Desert Island Dicks - GABBY BRYAN

Episode Date: November 9, 2023

Comedian and podcaster Gabby Bryan joins James to share who and what she'd hate to be stuck with on a desert island. Be sure to follow the podcast @dickspod and you can find Gabby at: https://www.instagram.com/gabbyisbryan/ https://www.tiktok.com/@gabbyisbryan Desert Island Dicks is sponsored by Love Honey! Use the Code DICKSBF now here: www.lovehoney.co/DesertIslandDicks_BF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hi, I'm James Deacon and welcome to Desert Island Dicks, the show that sees you marooned on a desert island after a plane crash with the worst people and worst things imaginable. Who they are and why they're a dick is up to our guest. And here to share their desert island dicks with us today is stand-up comedian Gabby Ryan. Hi, Gabby. Hi, I'm so happy to be stranded on this island with you. It's nice, it's nice out here. Yeah, okay, yeah.

I mean, nice so much as maybe right now, but you're going to live here for the rest of eternity, potentially. Right, but it has a Bahama Mama vibe, so I think I could get down with this. Okay, okay, cool. No, I appreciate that. Gabby, I'm just going to say, I think that you are,

I think you're possibly my first international record. I don't remember ever recording with anyone that was in America before. I could be wrong. Listeners, do not tell him. Let's claim to say that I'm the first international guest. I think so. And since we're in international waters, I think this works out so perfectly.

I think you're right. Yes. Okay, that's great. We spoke about it briefly before we started recording. How did you find putting together your list of people and things for the Desert Island? Yeah, so I put together my list at the comedy club last night. I have not looked at it since. I have really no

idea what i wrote and for the comics listening and even comedy fans you know that we're in sort of like a fugue state when we're doing comedy it's it's a blackout mentality and i have i can't even begin to guess what i wrote down so we will will see. We're going to find out together. Oh, this is great. Okay. I'm really into this. And we cut it up together. We can dissect these choices as we go through. So that's fine. And I think it's only fair to say, let's get started. Who's going to be your first choice for the desert island? The first person I wrote down is George Washington. And in parentheses next to him, I wrote too much ego. So if I'm going to have to go back in time and go into my brain, I'm thinking George Washington, right? America's

first president. Sure. We've all heard of him. I don't know if you know this. He was like 22 and hot famously. Whoa, that's cool. Yes. Oh, good. That's actually something we don't talk enough about George Washington is that he was famously hot, even though he also famously had wooden teeth. So you have to be so structurally sound to pull off wooden teeth. That's like a Matt Rife face, right? That he could oh he could crack a smile on their wooden and you're like i think i could get past that based on face and body so i'm i'm gonna assume that because george washington like just well he didn't even discover america he was just our first president um that now we're on this new island and he's going to want to be the first president.

Oh, wow. Right? Yeah, that's good. That is good. And I want to be the first president. You don't get to be the first president twice. That's not fucking fair. Okay?

That's true. This is such a good point. Yeah. So, too much ego. Too much ego. We don't need two politicians on this island together no true true i feel like the sense of entitlement from george washington that he is going to lead things right he's he's like it's a given that i'll lead this but you're going to be there being like hang on a minute i've got this yeah the times are different you know women can be in politics now

for all we know martha was Washington might have been a better politician, but she couldn't because she was too busy. I don't know. What did women do back then? I dare say. I dare say. I imagine. Bake?

Looking after the children. Get fucked? Like, what? No. It couldn't have been good. No, it's not good. Poor Martha had to marry a guy she had splinters in her mouth all day long for making out with a nightmare apparently she was yeah she was doing all right if he was he's hot stuff apart from the wooden teeth yeah I also read something and I can't

believe I know this because I know almost nothing about anything. Okay. But I read somewhere that Martha Washington was famous for a cake made out of black pepper. Right. Which sounds disgusting. It sounds grim, yeah. It's horrific. So that's how you know she was mentally unwell. She was baking her friend's cake with pepper in it. There it is.

I've Googled it. There's a pepper cake. Is that true? Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Sometimes as a blonde, I surprise myself by knowing anything. That's good. You're doing all right. Apparently, not only they made a pepper, they're aged for six months. It's six month old cake. That's not how cake works, my girl.

No wonder he had wooden teeth right oh my god they yanked him out he was eating too much fucking old pepper cake his dentist was like what's happening at home be honest with me i'm eating all this i'm eating all this fucking pepper cake i need some wooden teeth in there to get through it just like yeah okay this is good my wife is crazy okay so george washington yeah he's gonna have some really old school views as well he's gonna have some yeah he's gonna be extreme i think it's gonna be quite scary declaration of independence and it's like that didn't really work out so good yeah if he finds any aborigines they're dead immediately it's not let's be honest we know what georgie did and it wasn't great you know he's not going to be the leader that we need in the new world so i'm gonna that's the last person i want on my island and this is my island

now this is your chance to create your own hellscape of an island so it is your island and i can only imagine he had like you know back then they really were into those white powdered wigs and the outfit like he was seems really high maintenance yeah there's a lot of accessories happening that's true capris the little the high socks, the cobbly little shoes. That is a lot of effort. I mean, I can barely be bothered to put on a T-shirt and jeans each day. Exactly. How long has it taken him to get...

It's quite extravagant, right? It is extravagant. It's a little drag queen-y. It is a bit drag queen-y. We don't talk about how America was founded by queens. And God bless them I'm in like God honest pajamas right now at 10am in New York

I can't be waking up and George has to do a full skin care routine and hair style like he has to get hair and makeup done we have to find food we need to get food we need some wood we need to like we can't use your teeth so we need to like light the fire with something um okay also interesting that he's like

22 like that i don't think you need some 22 year old high horse energy on the island yeah it's like politicians are old as shit now george you're we've moved past it okay our president can't even open his eyes anymore listen we don't do we don't do young bucks around here no more oh this is good this is good okay i think we're gonna we can think about a little bit more about how george would be on the island when we introduce another person i think so yes what the interplay would be like so gabby who's going to be your second choice for the desert island so the next choice i had which does play into the first the first choice the shit i wrote down is truly like hieroglyphics yeah that's great um the next person i have down is emirata emily ratajkowski I can't wait for this. Please tell me why. Yes. So she is a model, as we all know.

She has giant tits, amazing body. And I wrote, I have to be the hottest person on the island because you know when the rescue boat comes, they're grabbing Amrata and leaving. They're leaving my ass there. If they see Amrata's tits on this island, they're taking her and leaving me to die okay and i want to be the hot one i want to get on the rescue boat and they're

like they put the captain's hat on me and i'm like they hand me an apparel spritz i have to be the hot one i love how you think the rescue goes it It's, oh, that is beautiful. They're like, get on here. I'm like, yeah. But then if she's there, if she's there, you feel like you're going to get second string. Okay. Oh my God.

They're going to be like, is that a new species of animal you found on this island? Amrata, are you doing scientific discoveries? Finding that ugly ass animal over there i'm like come on i'm a 10 in new jersey doesn't that count for anything they're like no you can't even you can't even be a woman near amrata it's over they're leaving you to die stressful that is stressful okay yes so that plays into that you know no hot people are coming with me on this island all goes exclusively yeah that's great

i mean we'll get into this in a minute but that that sets up your third choice perfectly i mean i can't wait because you've obviously classified this person in a certain way. Emrata, she has a podcast now, right? I mean, everyone has a podcast now, including me. We need to redefine what podcast means, okay? Yeah, yeah. The door's open. You can't just sit in a chair with big tits and have a podcast. That's what I do with no tits, okay?

You have to have no tits to do a podcast. That's how I feel. Oh, I need to go and work out, I think. Don't release this. You're not allowed to have this podcast. I don't want to see that hot of a person speak. That's not for you. Yeah, yeah, you're right.

I didn't grow into my head till I was 19. Yes. I'm the one who gets to speak now. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm with you. You be hot, I'll be hot in my late 20s, absolutely. Yes. But you be hot and go like this and have fun.

And then let us do the talking. Yes. I'm begging you. Okay. My friend and hilarious comedian, Hannah Burner, did her podcast. And it's an amazing episode. And watch it just because. Okay. I will.

Yeah. Yeah. Hannah is the queen of the punchline. And she kept asking Amrata if she shits. And it's literally the funniest thing. I mean, crude humor for a british audience but uh it is so funny emrata wouldn't couldn't answer like her her press was like do not answer okay it is really good it is really good look your reasoning behind emrata is i think

genius um anything else about emrata before we put her on the island? Yeah, also like speaking of podcasts, you know, I have my own podcast as a comedian called Le Podcast. We're on this island, right? I want to be the entertainer. Yeah, yeah. As well as the president.

I'm taking all roles. I want to be the one with the Desert Island podcast. If Emrata starts a Desert Island podcast, that's going to number one immediately and unjustifiably. So my podcast is going to be fucking hilarious. I'm going to be doing like coconut bits and I have like monkeys on, you know,

like it's going to be so much like logistically better than her podcast, but it won't get any attention because emrata is interviewing a rock for four hours yeah i'm literally juggling bananas like doing doing incredible comedic comedic comedy doing incredible comedic comedy can you tell it's 10 a.m here maybe this is saying more about it about you than it is about emrata is it i know i'm i'm sort of it's turning a corner now and i'm i'm being really attention seeking where i have to get i have to have every role on this island this says something about me but we're gonna fly past it because this isn't a psychoanalyst podcast

okay based on what you said in that choice i am desperate to hear who your third person is going to be from this island my third person um and this is actually i'm on a real kick right now with this person okay the third person is zach efron interesting okay another hot guy but i don't know if you're familiar um with his travel show oh oh i'm you're about to lose your life to this show okay zach efron who is god bless him so dumb right so so dumb and i hate to slander three celebrities i'm including that's great might as well do your career in one fell swoop yeah let's go yeah zach efron his marbles gonna miss it you know what i'm saying he's he's dumb visibly and and internally and um i am obsessed with him because of that and he has this show on Netflix. I think it's called down to earth or something like that. And he travels the world with this legit random guy is his co-host.

He is like co-hosting the show with his neighbor. Like it is a random guy. I think he wrote a book. Like the co-host is just like a white guy from la and they travel the world and they go to all it's like sustainable and they go to all these places but zach's so dumb that he can't have a conversation with these like geniuses who are doing like you know eco living and all this stuff so he's always just like whoa this is sick whoa this is sick oh Whoa, this is sick. Oh my God, this food's really good.

And it's like hours of this. And his co-host is like pretty knowledgeable about everything. So his co-host is always like, yeah, Zach, this is cool. So moving on. Oh, really? It's so funny. I've seen almost every episode.

I can't get enough of it. And then they have to, in post, they had to have Zach record a bunch of voiceover to explain what's going on because he doesn't do it in the episode. He just shows up at a place and he's like, I like your outfit. Whoa, that's cool.

It's amazing. So the reason I wouldn't want him on the island with me is because he has no tactile skills or there's no way he could help in any way and then when the rescue boat comes they're gonna be like sick zach efron and then grab him i'm i'm dead again yeah because you know every guy just like loves zach efron for some reason I don't know how that happened he was a little twink on High School Musical he was he's every guy's guy how did he make that I mean an excellent job we actually did not to bring up my podcast again we did a an investigation on Zach Efron as a as a theory and we have a whole hour episode where we dive in um to what we believe

Zac Efron is um to society but yeah I'm I'm pretty I'm coming off of that episode and finishing up his series what's his look like on the show does he embody some kind of like traveler type looking? Well, it depends. Are we talking first season or second season? You tell me. You tell me. I can't wait to find out. First season, he is very buff right now. Like almost too buff where you're like, how do you even pull that off? Like, are you okay?

Like his neck is like twice the size of his head you're like is there a spine in your body or is it like steel beams like like he's structurally so sound actually that it's wild there's like scaffolding around him at all times. So the first season, he's really like hippy dippy, like a man you would find in a hostel. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm with you. He's wearing like a drug rug. He has like an unkept beard.

Yeah. And like a flat rim hat. Oh, wow. Just horrific. He's in a lot of like skating t-shirts, but like not the hot ones, like Quicksilver, you know? Like his look is atrocious. It's like fully,

like someone off the rack packed son level look. And then the second season yeah he's going for sort of like a a johnny bravo look like he's in the middle of the woods but he's like perfectly shaven and like clean cut and in like a white t-shirt he's like hiking and jumping off cliffs in like a crisp white t-shirt i don't know not it does at least the first one made sense the second look makes no sense he's like in australia like a carving of a you know like processing meat in dress like he's in the streets of la it's it's so wrong that it's right. I'm obsessed with the show. It's not meant to be.

It's supposed to be like heartwarming. Of course. It's laugh out loud funny. Oh my God. Yes. Thank you. That is what I'm going to do tonight. It's there.

I'm there. That's great. I can't wait to see Zac Efron just looking confused in villages around the world. I mean, the thing is, who's even more confused in the show is the people he's talking to. And that's really awesome. Like, he'll be talking to, like, a villager who's like, oh, my God, Zac Efron. Like, this is awesome.

You know, like, everyone's like, it's like they're in the middle of Indonesia. And they're like, holy shit, Zac Efron's here. I'm like they're in the middle of indonesia and they're like holy shit zach efron's here i'm like why yeah they're all like what are you doing here and and he's he can't and then they can't even have a conversation with him because he's dumb as rocks so they're just like they all walk away being like well this was weird it sounds like everyone involved in this show is confused why it's happening and that yes and it's also really funny to like imagine him pitching this show to people like him walking into a room full of producers and being like hey hey my guys isn't the earth awesome he's like you know what i've noticed this planet's beautiful so you want to get out there

with me like yeah actually sweet let's go zach whatever you want we can do carry us let's go yeah yeah he's like i've totally noticed that outside is so crazy. Let's get out there together. Sweet. You're like, oh yeah, Zach, we're in. Amazing, amazing. Oh my God. Okay, so far you've created a very hellish item for yourself. But now, mercifully, among the wreckage of the plane,

there was some food and drink left over. Unfortunately for you, it's your least favorite food and drink in the world. What are and why are they so bad let's see what i wrote okay let's go let's do drink so what i wrote down is margaritas my my reasoning is i don't want to get too comfortable and have too much fun so when the rescue boat comes i'm like i'm good you can leave me oh yeah okay yeah yeah yeah i'm like too drunk and then now i'm having a good time and it turns into like a beach party and i just let the rescue leave me there because it's a blast yeah i can imagine you stood on the beach there's a rescue boat and then there's an airplane full of margaritas. And you're just like in between like, and then just stay.

Oh my God, guys, it's the Margs. I'm sorry I look like this. So it's definitely the Margs. Gabby, the Uber's here. I'm having too much of a good time. Just leave me. I'm good. I'll call one later.

That's so good. It's my night off so I'm going to stay here yeah that's fun margaritas does that to me too I would say and so I feel like it must be the tequila right

a margarita will have you will have you so joyous honestly really the Christmas angel inside of you you are having the best time and also the sugar mixed with the tequila you could stay up for 24 hours like it's like 30 red bulls yeah it's crazy like i have the best time if i have a margarita i actually i would say i have a best the best time if i have tequila and but having it in a margarita i actually i would say i have a best the best time if i have tequila and but having it in a margarita with the sugar combo is that is beautiful it ends i mean when i drink margaritas

i am like globe trotting like the amount of space you could cover on a margarita is is wild yeah you'll be like i don't need that rescue boat i'm swimming home do you know i mean i'll swim home i'm good i kind of like I feel like you're getting away with one here because having an island full of tequila would be great actually it would be fun but I like your reasoning that it would hinder your opportunity to get off the island yes okay this all makes sense it all it does make sense I even better than you choosing tequila and us talking about it is you trying to make sense of what you wrote down yesterday. That's yeah, it's good. I'm enjoying this. I swear to God, I wrote this in the dark and I have not looked at it since. So

I think this is really fun for all of us. Oh, yeah. I mean, I'm really enjoying it. Okay. So margarita is going to be your drink choice what's going to be your food choice the food i wrote down is hummus and then in parentheses it says we'll binge eat it so i think my my science there was like uh i i won't be able to ration i mean how can you not eat a whole tub of hummus immediately? It just goes. It's impossible to not. It goes.

It just goes. Yeah. So if there's going to be however many tubs of hummus, I'm binge eating that one day and then I'm starving. For the rest of my time on this island, I won't survive. It's so true. It is so true. I feel like you're kind of getting time on this island I won't survive it's so true it is so true I feel like you're kind of getting away with this imagine a night with constant margaritas and unlimited

hummus it's actually a good night you you didn't tell me that I can't spin the system and still have fun honest to honest to god I've got a lot of respect God, I've got a lot of respect for it. I've got a lot of respect for it. I feel like you've spun it to the right degree though, because the reasons are there. I can't stop that. Do you know what I mean? I can't say anything to that

because you have a reason why. You're going to eat all the hummus on the first day, but now all I want to do is go out and find a shitload of hummus and some margaritas. This island rocks. It's actually kind of quite good. I'm with three hotties and I have hummus and margaritas. I mean, I can't really contest your hummus that much.

I don't know what else to say. I mean, I can't say anything more to that. I'm going to put that on the island. So thank you very much, Gabby. Right. Fortunately for you, you won't be without entertainment on the island the planes entertainment system continues to work but just your luck it only has two working settings one is your least favorite film of all time and the other is your least favorite song what are they and why okay these answers are you

could tell i was running out of steam here okay because things are starting to make less sense all right the song i wrote and i quote i don't know question mark baby shark question mark i think that feels obvious it's a hellish that's a hellscape of a song that's awful that is awful the thing i don't understand about baby shark is as how as an adult with no kids how have I heard that song so many times? No, that's true. I am an adult with two kids and honest to God, it's so painful. And I don't know. I'm so sorry that the pain in your voice right now is palpable.

You love your kids, so you give them what they want. But really, I don't think I could listen to it again. Luckily, they grew out of it at one stage or another. But sometimes I go around friends' houses and they do have small children and you might encounter it but honest honestly it is the worst it is the worst when I was growing up my parents just played music they liked and then I sort of dealt with that as a child right yes because they are like we we clothe and feed you and house you so shut the fuck up so we listen to the fact that baby shark it has all of these parents in a chokehold

is so so sad and says something about society so we desperately try and get the kids to listen to stuff that we also like so like we've introduced them to some bands and some songs and they're like they like those songs and it's really good for us but we also do have amazon alexa in the house and they just put on what they want they just like go up to it and like the amount of times i've heard that song from that wednesday program is ridiculous you know you know i can dance, dance with my hands. If I have to hear that again, that could easily go on the island. Although it's not my island.

You know how we're so afraid of AI as a global society? I think the AI takeover has already happened the moment kids figured out how to work with the Amazon Alexas. It's already done. The takeover has with the Amazon Alexas. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's already done. The takeover has, the war has begun. A three-year-old knows how to work an Amazon Alexa. My Amazon Alexa doesn't even, doesn't even hear my voice for some reason.

I'm saying her name out loud. She hasn't even said what? But if a three-year-old walks in here, immediately she's like, what do you want? You know you know there's some they're going for the kids yeah she's learning she's learning it's the future we're in trouble we're in trouble baby shark on repeat for the rest of your life is that is horrific it is horrific and also i don't know if it's sort of like a swan song for sharks, but then there's a bunch of baby sharks coming to the island. I can't even take a dip because the water is filled with sharks

because their anthem is playing. And that sucks. Yeah, that does. But also, like, you're tipsy off margaritas yeah i mean you don't want baby shark you need something to dance to you need something fun yeah and that's exactly yeah it's that's hell baby shark goes on the island and what's going to be your film choice okay this is like very a personal another personal vendetta. I wrote Titanic for multiple reasons. For the obvious reason is like, it's a real triggering because. A bit too close to home.

A bit too close to home. Yeah. Yeah. Their boat crashed. My plane crashed. I survived. Then I'm thinking about Leo, Leo dying, you know, like it's all, but the, the film and, and reality are blending together in such a

demonic way. Also, I've never understood the hype around Titanic. And I'll tell you why. I recently saw Titanic for the first time last year. Whoa. I know. And it's because, and I don't know if you guys had this in the UK, but it feels actually very British. So maybe you even invented it. We had these films growing up called, they were the thumb films. Do you know what I'm talking about? No, it was like thumbs play different characters in famous films. It was like a child, a child series, but it was like rated r so actually do you know what i'm talking about okay i i know i can imagine what you're talking about but i've never seen it right

okay and so it's like it's like you know like thumbs it's like this but they have like little wigs on okay yeah yeah yeah yeah and there was Thumb Trek, and there was also Thumbtanic, right? And I saw Thumbtanic when I was like six, a million times. So by the time I was old enough to watch the actual film, I was like, I already know the plot points. I'm not interested. I already saw the better version of it, of the plot with thumbs which is awesome

you know why would i need to see this film version yeah um so that film has always haunted me because i think it's the boring version of the true story um what did you think when you watched it did you enjoy it i was like okay it didn't blow my top off like everyone else i mean it was kind of scary but also everyone was being so dumb like it's one of those things where you're watching a movie like a horror movie and you're like he's right behind you it's like ridiculous how you don't sense that he's behind you you know or like don't go into the woods right now girl probably not a good idea it's like that so watching titanic i'm like it's like i wish it was choose your own adventure because you'd be like hey just go down the other hallway and get on the boat you idiots is it because you didn't

have the internet back then you idiots oh this is good i love that that's what you took away that's brilliant i'd need to see the thumbtanic version i think i want to see it in six minutes i think titanic is a great also it's like three hours long it's a painfully long film it doesn't need to be that long and like you might have watched it once and you're like oh it also gives me nothing and then like a few days later and then you've got to sit through it again that's wasting a lot of your life it's tragic listen i'm on an island i want to enjoy the sites i want to go on a hike i'm like i want to be outdoors i don't want to watch this long ass boring ass film you want to go on a drunken hike

exactly and get eaten by a wolf immediately like just get this over with i don't know what island has wolves but i don't know but also all full of hummus do you know what i mean yeah it's not cute i mean i didn't mean i didn't intend the segue to be like this, but is there anything else about Titanic before we move on? I think everyone's ugly in it. Does that count for anything? I think everyone looks really bad except for Leo, and then you're like, he's the poor one,

but no one's being like, but he's so hot. You know, that's also right there. It's probably because everyone else in the film is meant to be British and he's the only American one. And they're like, ew, Americans are hotter than us. Fuck that. Kill him off. Yeah.

Get him off. We all have to have rosacea. Titanic goes on the island and um you mentioned wolves but um finally the island is overrun by the biggest dick of all the animals which animal is it and why hilarious way of saying that by the way um i wrote cat okay yeah and it's because uh they're not to be trusted i think we could all agree at this point that that cats yeah don't care if we live or die it's true yeah they're against us and they're conniving and i would even go as far as to say evil oh yeah okay and i'm gonna be surrounded by these

animals that i can't even trust okay okay And then I suddenly figure they all band together and figure out how to like take me down and eat me. You know, like I, I, I see a war of me against me drunken drink, like hammered on margaritas, trying to battle a million cats.

And they're so agile. Like I just, I don't think I stand a chance yeah i think you're right i think you're right it's true it's true i think they hate us i mean anyone that that is convinced that the cat loves them is in denial or just is looking for love in the wrong places yeah literally they're in a toxic relationship with their pet yeah the only benefit i would say to a cat rather than a dog is the cat just takes itself outside to go to the toilet whereas a dog you've got to walk it around and pick it up do you know what i mean right but if you're on an island the dog is

going oh it's true it's true you know it's true you can still convince a wild dog to love you they're man's best friend right have? Have you ever watched the show Alone? No. I'm giving you so much media. Yeah, I know. This is great. I'm going to watch. Yeah, I've got a podcast to watch, a series, and now Alone.

What's Alone? The show Alone. I got obsessed with the show during the pandemic, which is very fitting. It's on National Geographic or something. And they take like self-proclaimed survivalists and they drop them in the middle of, of like Mongolia or, or Canada or somewhere crazy. And they could have like three tools and they have the, they have their own camera, they camera and a satellite phone. And the whole goal is to survive as long as possible. Yes.

And then you win. But they're filming themselves. So they're fully alone for like months on end. I think the person who lasted longest was like four months in like some island off of Canada. And these people are going that, yes that they could figure out to eat some can figure out how to eat some can figure out how to stay warm whatever but the main ones that go crazy is for no like with no social interaction or love and they start spiraling oh wow and they're like talking to the camera like

yeah like i miss i just need to say hi to someone like i need to talk to someone blah blah like Hyraling. Oh, wow. And they're like talking to the camera. Like, yeah. Like I miss, I just need to say hi to someone. Like I need to talk to someone, blah, blah, blah. Like they're all going fucking crazy because they haven't talked to someone. That is nuts. Okay. I wouldn't have even thought that.

It's like, it's way more emotional than it is physical. There's one woman on this series who is like, she must be the luckiest woman alive. She's an herbalist, right? So there's like survival on this, this series who is like, she must be the luckiest woman alive. She's, she's an herbalist, right? So there's like survivalists who hunters there's fishers, whatever this woman is an herbalist.

So at first you're like, there's no way she's making it. Like she, all she has is like a, uh, what's it called? Pizzle of Malta. Yeah.

Yeah. You know, she doesn't have actual hunting skills. She hangs up one fishing net and catches salmon like every single day. She has, at one point she goes, I have just too much fish. Like, and people are starving to death. And she's like, it's actually really nice out here. And she ends up, she ends up tapping because she's like, honestly, I just miss my kids and goes home.

It's the best. That's great. That's how you want it to go. I mean, you don't produce the show, but surely this is a nightmare just in case, like how can they contact someone? Like what if something bad happens? Does bad stuff happen?

Oh yeah, some of them get really injured. It's crazy that this show exists Gabby this has been a lot of fun thank you so much for coming on thanks for having me this has been awesome it's been really fun so we spoke a little bit before we started recording so you're heading out on tour or you're heading over here to do some dates yes what's the plan i'm doing a london tour i i often go out and do a bunch of shows but this time i'm throwing my own show on december 8th at 21 soho i don't know the exact time but i'm assuming it's like eight seven or eight or something. And it is called slags versus sluts. And it's my, um, grand competition of who is sluttier Americans or, or girls from the UK.

And there's a bunch of hilarious comedians doing it. Um, Chloe pets, Horatio, uh, gold, Taddy McLeod Zach Senior my co-host it's a perfect fusion of Katie Green, Americans and British women competing for the title of Who's Sluttiest

that sounds really fun and it's stand up and segments and it's fun it's going to be great December 8th you you could get tickets in the link in my bio, baby, or on 21soho.com. And you mentioned before about your podcast. Where can people find your podcast?

Yes, I have a podcast called La Podcast with Gabby Bryan and Zach Signore, L apostrophe podcast. I know that's not how you spell it in French. We did that on purpose. Shut up, okay? It's available Spotify, Amazon music, Apple music, wherever you find your podcasts, you'll find it because we are pretty much naked on the cover wearing berets.

Um, you'll see that immediately. You could also find that in the bio of all my social media, which is at Gabby is Brian G A B B Y I S B RY-I-S-B-R-Y-A-N on TikTok and Instagram and I have a Twitter I don't go on it but if you want to see old tweets by me go ahead and see that it's a lot of it's about like salad

like it's not fun but find me on YouTube and TikTok and Instagram great thank you so much, Gabby. Oh my God. Thanks for having me. This has been psychotic.