Desert Island Dicks - LAURA RAMOSO

Episode Date: September 25, 2023

Sketch-comedian Laura Ramoso joins Dan to share who and what she'd hate to be stuck with on a desert island! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello, my name is Dan. This is Desert Island Dicks. I don't know why I'm saying it like that, but it is. And we have got a guest for you today, and her name is Laura Ramoso. And you might know her from Instagram and TikTok, where she talks a lot about her... Well, she does impressions of her German mother and her Italian dad, and loads of other funny things besides that. Let me tell you what what if you are listening to this right now on monday the 25th of september then you might still be able to get tickets to go and see her at soho theatre in london because she's here until the 30th doing a run at soho theatre but she had very good reviews for this show from edinburgh and for soho theatre so yeah

if you know her uh and like her stuff, or even if you don't, maybe go and check out some of her stuff. And yeah, that's that. Hey, talking of seeing funny people live, did I mention, I know I did mention, but I'm going to mention it again. We're doing Desert Island Dicks live

as part of the Cheerful Earful Podcast Festival. And we have got the wonderful, brilliant Jenny Eclair as our guest, and it's going to be really good. And you know what? It's actually only about, God, like six weeks away or something. I should probably, I don't know. I don't really know what I'm going to do. I was going to say probably prepare.

I don't need six weeks to prepare. It's not like I need a Rocky-style training montage. But it's exciting. You can get tickets style training montage but uh it's exciting you can get tickets from cheerfullyerful.co.uk they cost under a tenner which is i just think it's a bargain so go and do that come and hang out we can have a little drink and have a little laugh that's the kind of you know what's better than that little drink and a little laugh what a great evening it's a classic classic recipe i'm overtired and i'm talking too much so let me stop and instead introduce our

guest it is laura ramoso on desert island dicks from commutes that become learning sessions to dishwashing filled with laughs podcasts can help you make the most out of your everyday and when it comes to everyday spending you can count on on the PC Insider's World Elite MasterCard to help you earn the most PC Optimum points everywhere you shop. The PC Insider's World Elite MasterCard, the card for living unlimited. Conditions apply to all benefits. Visit PCFinancial.ca for details. Hi, I'm Dan Benedictus and welcome to Desert Island Dicks, the show that sees you marooned on a desert island after a plane crash with the worst people and worst things imaginable. Who they are and why they're a dick is up to our guest and here to share their Desert Island Dicks with us today is comedian famous for her German mother, Italian dad and much more besides.

It's Laura Ramoso. How are you doing? Hi, I'm doing really good. How are you? Good. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you for joining us today. I think you're a busy person, you know, just got back from Edinburgh and you're in the middle of a run in Soho Theatre. So I appreciate you making the time for us. Oh, my pleasure. Thanks for having me. Now, it's always nice to have international guests on the show. I mean, you are about as international as it's possible for a human to be, I think. I guess you could say that. I'm sure there's people who are way more international than I, definitely.

But yeah, I've had a pretty interesting upbringing. Yeah. So based in Canada, but you've lived in all parts of the world. So you have a German mother, an Italian dad, as lots of your comedy is based around. So you, I think, have a unique perspective on the world. Does that mean it's easy for you to sort of think of a big list of people you'd hate to spend time with on an island because you think so globally? It's definitely, it was easy to think of a category of people I would least like to be stuck with on a desert island. And yeah, obviously they are based on real personal experiences.

I'll let the listeners into a secret. We delayed this slightly, so I don't want to keep you waiting even longer. So let's just get straight into it. And let's see who your first dick is going to be on the island. Yeah, okay. So the first person I'd least like to be stuck on a desert island with is my middle school bully. Okay, Yeah. It was a terrible time as what 11 year old being bullied by someone who was also 11. I think that's really a bad situation. But wouldn't it be so much worse if you had to re-meet this person in your late 20s on a desert island?

Like they're probably not a good person still. I think it would revert back to that sort of middle school dynamic and I'd feel very insecure again and sort of I wouldn't want to team up with this person to like make shelter or learn how to make fire yeah yeah because the ideal is on an island you'd all try and find a middle ground and get along but you'd have to sort of have a long conversation about why they were such a horrible bully because I'd like presumably they'd realize unless it was just I mean most bullies know that they're making people's lives a misery I think and you know I like to believe we can all move on and people can change and stuff like that but you'd have to get past that first wouldn wouldn't you? And that would be horrendous and awkward. Yeah, definitely. You'd have to have that 11 year old conversation without a counselor this time.

And yeah, no, it would be probably a horrible time. I don't know if I'm allowed to say this, but I think I would just throw my body back into the ocean. You're very much allowed to say it. I mean, you can say you throw their body into the ocean if you want. Well, that would be okay. Yeah, I'll say that. I'll throw their body allowed to say it. I mean, you can say you throw their body into the ocean if you want. Well, that would be, okay, yeah, I'll say that. I'll throw their body back into the ocean. Yeah, I think, I mean, I've been fairly fortunate in that I don't think I had any real bullying, except I remember, I think when I experienced bullying was like when I was really young. I'm sort of like five or six, you know, but even now if I think about that person,

it sort of like makes me jittery and you know I'm 41 now so the idea of like somewhat like a you know if I imagine like a six-year-old now saying these things I just like who are you what I don't care yeah of course step on them yes but uh yeah the idea of meeting them is like that that's weird, you know? I know. It's very primal. It's like your first experience with that sort of dynamic and the first time you feel those feelings. And, yeah, it's PTSD. Yeah.

I think it's weird because in a way, you kind of think of like when you see kids and you go, I know you're capable of all this sort of stuff and you don't quite understand empathy and things like that. But at the same time, it's like, like I mean they're such vicious little bastards it's almost like I think you must understand it at some level because you're really good at like you know twisting the knife it's so true and then there's some kids who don't bully so obviously they understand um but don't they say that kids who are really mean are there's a reason for that

like a very sad you know personal or home reason for why they act out that way and like you know bad home life or something like that but um i guess when you're young you just don't really know yeah but i mean i've known people who wereies, who I've also known them well enough to know what their background was like, and Maybe I'll just let it slide. But I think it would come out at some point, wouldn't it? And so that's exactly what you would say, like back in whatever grade. Oh, definitely. And of course, the person who was your middle school bully, if you really slot them into a box, turns up to be, they probably sell essential oils on the internet now they're part of an mlm or pyramid scheme you know that's their whole energy so i really feel they wouldn't be helpful on a desert island anyway yeah i do think they have a sort of grown-up pyramid scheme energy

i think you're right yeah it's sort of like being able to loudly proclaim your success but still also kind of pressure people quite a lot. Oh, yeah, definitely. They're always on about their husband, who they married when they were 19, and their beautiful three little angels. I don't know. Yeah, I think if you post about stuff too much,

it's masking something. Yeah. Okay, well, yeah, a bully from your middle school goes on the island with you that's a good first choice who would uh your second choice be okay second i wrote down the guy who takes rec league sports way too seriously for for those of us in the uk rec league what would that what would the equivalent sort of be there's sports leagues that you can join as an adult they have different levels intermediate beginner intermediate or advanced and it's essentially What would the equivalent sort of be? There's sports leagues that you can join as an adult.

They have different levels, beginner, intermediate, or advanced. And it's essentially leagues that are organized by some sort of organization where they make teams and then they organize tournaments. And it's essentially a way to play team sports as an adult without having it be, you don't have to be a professional yeah i don't know what would the equivalent be here in the uk i mean i guess they do they have things like that so yeah i mean i think it's just i don't know if we have like a name for it or it might just be that i know so little about sports we do have a name for it and i just don't know so i'm sure you do i know that people you know like friends of my wife's play and play sports like

play netball and they're in a league so i think it they do exist but i just don't know what if there's a banner for them or something right no that would definitely be what it is is if you're an adult who plays a sport um and you're not a professional that's you're probably playing in some sort of recreational league yeah okay gotcha. Do you find there's any particular type of sports person that are worse than others? Or is it just like a general sort of grown-up jock vibe that's annoying? It's definitely a general grown-up jock vibe. I think the sport that I would most associate this guy with is, I don't know if spike ball became really popular here in the uk i'm not sure what

that is is that like a baseball but you hit it off a uh like a sort of little pedestal thing yeah so you hit it off of a net that's around and it sits on the ground and it's a small ball and it's kind of like i wouldn't say it's like volleyball but uh but essentially it's two versus two or one versus one or whatever and you hit it on to the net and then the other person has to lob it back up and hit it back onto the net and it sort of bounces off the net yes it bounces off the net and it's uh it became really popular at least in um in toronto this summer and and the stereotype is it's like dude let's play some spike ball man like that's the vibe that it got so i don't know if this translates uh here in the uk do you have a sport

that's that's more like that that kind of generates this kind of this sky this atmosphere um i don't know i mean that seems almost like a sort of a novelty sport that's become a bit serious yes right like yes yeah what would it i can I don't know what an equivalent of that would be. But I think it is especially galling if the thing they're playing is ultimately a bit ridiculous and then they're taking it very seriously. Oh, yes. Like Ultimate Frisbee.

I would associate that with this guy too. Yeah. Yeah. I know this sort of thing you mean. I mean, here, this isn't an equivalent but it's a similar sort of vibe so you know uh like lots of parks have set up little 5 10k runs you know every weekend so you can if you if you're a keen runner you can just go along and they'll give you a time so you've got a personal best and blah blah blah and there's you know a lot of

people go oh I started doing a park run at my local park did a 5k you know and all that sort of stuff and a lot of people just sort of have a go and it's nice to have someone time you and as a community and that sort of thing some people take it really seriously and I was in the park once uh when my my oldest son was just a baby and I was pushing him around in the buggy and like this this group of runners just came like hurtling around, really sticking to the racing line of the park. And there was another group of walkers in the way. And some guy got so angry. He was like, guys, look out the way.

It's a park run. And one of the stewards even had to say, yes, it's just a park run. Chill out. You're supposed to go around bystanders. It's a park run. Wow. Yeah. And I was like, mate, can't you hear yourself? Yeah,standers it's a park run wow yeah and i was like mate can't you hear yourself yeah you said it's a park run you didn't say guys get out the way this is the final of the olympic 200 meters you know and it's that sort of energy he's thinking what are you doing i know you want to get your personal best but you are in a public park you're not on a racetrack

so yeah that's hilarious that is the guy that's the guy um so i think we've we've we've nailed uh who it is and i just feel there would be way too much talking down and way too much stretching for my liking on this desert island um trying to get too many personal bests and organizing who does what i think in life ultimately like i like to practice something i call sort of positive nihilism you know which is kind of going you know like this thing right now is important to me but ultimately it's bollocks you know like you know you can take whatever seriously you know take your running seriously take your time in the gym or doing any sport seriously but like don't expect

anyone else to really care that much because ultimately doesn't matter you know yeah that's a great mindset but I think it works quite well when the world is on fire you know like you try and do your bit but also try and not worry too much every single moment at the time 100% doesn't always work I'm sort of testing it out but um yeah you're on the island with someone who's constantly taking things a bit too seriously or one day you're throwing shells into a coconut shell from a distance to pass the time he gets really into it you wake up the next day he's drawn out a like a rotor system or like a league like a tournament you know it just all escalates and gets a bit much absolutely he's found a head band and wristband somehow also just the shortest shorts

you've ever seen in your life and i mean they're very separate but i wonder how his kind of vibe goes along with the sort of school bully vibe because there's you know there's a sort of a weird they both sort of involve like a fixation on something and a bit of anger. Definitely. Oh, I think they're married. I think they got married. They're together for sure.

They don't talk though. It's a silent marriage. Yeah, yeah. It's very much on Instagram only kind of happy family. Exactly. I can see a lot of difficult interplay between the characters and you. And that's what I love to see on this podcast. Finally, then for the for the people, who's going to be the final person? Okay, so I feel like when I say this, some people might think,

why wouldn't you want to be stuck on a desert island with this person? But my third and final person I wouldn't want to be stuck on a desert island with this person. But my third and final person I wouldn't want to be stuck on a desert island with is your therapist. Right. Okay, good. Good. What are your reasons for that? I think that you think that you'd have a person to kind of talk to about this experience. And they obviously have the training and the understanding of what might be going on mentally, psychologically with what's happening. But they are also going through the experience. And I wouldn't want to be there for my therapist becoming a three-dimensional person with feelings as well.

Like I only see them. Obviously, you pay your therapist to talk about your problems. And I don't know that I want to know what they think and what their problems. I want to see them as this, on top of this pedestal I've put them on, of this person who knows everything and who is a comfort. And to see them fall into the same pit I am would be heavily destabilizing. And it's weird, isn't it? Because of course, therapists also have problems. But you kind of just imagine, like, well, you know, all the answers to stuff, and you'd be able to sort of self examine and go, Oh, well, that's probably my, my problem.

That's what this is coming up like this. And of course, they have issues and problems and fears and worries and concerns all the time. But it'd be quite weird seeing that from them oh yeah yeah and who am i supposed to call when we get off the island yeah yeah because i think a big thing for them as well as like you know like you have your time then the time's up and they go okay well we've got to stop there because blah blah blah blah and sometimes like i'm i just want everyone to be friends with me so i always kind of forget that like you know you shouldn't add a little kiss at the end when you text them or something like that you know it's got to be professional but you know we'll have a joke sometimes as well amongst all the other stuff going on but so to then try and live in a world where they're sort of like they're not your friend but you've got to get along but

sometimes they could be your counselor they know all your history yes you know it's like a friend of mine's an osteopath and you know that you're not always supposed to say can you just have a look at this pain in my shoulder yeah but sometimes you also want him to and he's there but you need to sort of go listen at some point tomorrow if you've got time could you just check this out yeah but i don't live with him all the time so imagine if you're like there with your therapist and you're like i would really like to just have an hour with you to talk about this yes but then we have to continue living you can't just like turn like you know like if it's online you can't just shut the screen and then go about your life so you have to navigate that i know the power imbalance too would be very um very stark yeah and you'd kind

of have to sort of go well you must know about all this crap like what do we like like what do we do is he an arsehole like i'm pretty sure he is an arsehole or is that me yeah and then when they're an arsehole i know have you seen um triangle of Sadness? Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes. I have seen that. OK, Triangle of Sadness. I feel like the therapist in this scenario would be the head of housekeeping from the boat who usurps the sort of submarine and has sex with everybody and and kills the girl at the end. Like they would just get hungry with power. I think that's the therapist in this scenario. Yeah, I guess so. So, I mean, you know, if we're going to talk about being able to play mind games, then, you know, they're sort of black belts compared to us,

I would have thought. Yeah, 100%. Yeah. Scary. I also wonder if you, because I don't know, it depends what you talk to your therapist about, but sometimes I just think, I hear myself talking and I go, bloody hell, I sound like such a fucking dick.

Yeah. And they'll kind of go, no, no, no, no, no. Because look, you've got this going on. Look, it's fine that you feel like this because, yeah, they were wrong to do that. But, you know, maybe you reacted like this. And you go, okay, yeah, cool. I'm not the dick.

But then sometimes on the island they go, you know that time? You fucking were the dick. You were the dick. And then sometimes on the island they go, you know that time you fucking were the dick and you were the crybaby and you need to pull yourself together. Stop thinking about all these things that happened when you were young. I know. It would rock your world.

It's not supposed to happen. It's not right. You should have your therapist on a desert island with you. Yeah, yeah. Okay, well, look, I think this is a really good setup so because also so the other thing i was just thinking like imagine seeing your therapist who you've trusted with all your

hopes and fears and worries and concerns and being so vulnerable with imagine they're just sitting there by the fire with your school bully just like having a laugh yeah you're like this is the person i was telling you about don't talk to them yeah i seem all right yeah i'm fine i think he was just joking you know oh and you're horrible skin yeah yeah no no no oh it's getting nicely complicated i like that okay we have the people uh it's in their starring roles um but mercifully amongst the wreckage of the plane there was some food and drink left over unfortunately for you it's your least favorite food and drink in the world what are they and why are they so bad oh my god okay my least favorite thing to eat is licorice it's oh yeah how do you feel about licorice i think it's one of those things that's like, we've got better confectionery now.

So why does it still exist? It's not the only thing you have on like your break when you work on the railway. You know, it's so disgusting to me. And I don't see how anyone sees any pleasure from it. But it just fills your mouth and senses with it kind of like smoke but not smoky but just just so strong and unpleasant I could not I can't even eat a little bit yeah there's things that taste of it that I don't mind that much like is it fennel has that sort of like that's sort of okay for me but like this thing that's supposed to be like a treat like a sweet is i mean this is madness and then in some countries it's extra hard and they add salt to it

salt oh were you having too much fun yeah yeah do you want to rip the first layer off your tongue and palate yeah it's terrible absolutely horrible yeah it's um like certain things like that and there's like certain kind of biscuits you get like over here in the uk there's a type of biscuit called rich tea biscuits and they're basically one step away from like the sort of crackers you'd have with cheese you know but they're supposed to be like a sweet biscuit and it's like why are you still buying these when there are nice ones with chocolate on? And what are you doing? Are you like some kind of, you know, like you see on YouTube, I think these days there's like a new movement of,

what do they call them? Like in sort of Greek and Roman times where people were sort of deliberately led a harsh life. Stoics. Oh, okay. Right. You know, where you're not supposed to have too much luxury you're a bit sort of pious and kind of like a spartan lifestyle of like not having too many things you know work hard just and i just kind of think i get it and maybe we're too comfortable in

lots of ways but but also just like fucking have a treat now it's why it's it's gotten life's gotten too good that you have to inflict this upon yourself is that's a problem just enjoy yeah yeah it's like everyone telling us to have cold showers all the time oh come on tell me about it it's hot water yeah yeah i know one of the nicest bits of my day is having a hot shower i know make it worse for me feed me licorice afterwards or people who climb who people who um climb mountains and then you know a nail like a that sort of tent bed onto the mountain and sleep on the side like a hanging like a hammock yeah like extreme climbing look why why do you have to do this i mean I would go so far as to say, why does anyone camp? But, you know, some people feel really strongly about camping.

I don't know. I can't do it. I mean, I don't mind a bit of like going in a tent with my friends and family when it's kind of quite easy. And like the kids can look after themselves and we can have a drink around a fire. But I'm not going. I'm very, very much not going off grid. Yes. Yes. Backcountry. Yeah. drink round a fire but i'm not going i'm very very much not going off grid yes yes back country yeah i mean i suppose that's the sort of thing where licorice probably did come about it's like

it's never going to go old you know it's like jerky licorice raisins all the dry dark foods they're yours for the taking nom Nomad. Yes. So dark. So, so dark. Okay. Well, should we give you a little selection box of the various types of licorice? You know, one is just that stick of licorice that people use to have and, like, bite off. Yeah. I mean, it's never really been that popular over here. We used to have, like, licorice all sorts, which was sort of, you know, I don't know if you're familiar with them.

I've seen them, yes, yes. yes yeah and some were a bit more fun like some didn't have that much licorice in basically and then others were more uh but yeah i think they're pretty much died out but then you go to other countries and they're still just bang into the hard salty licorice okay okay and what would your drink choice be what are you going to wash the licorice down with oh red bull red bull yeah yeah and it's not even um the the energy part of it which might come in handy on a desert island or or yeah but it's the taste it just it i can't it's tastes and smells like gasoline and um if if someone is drinking a Red Bull like two meters away from you, you can already smell it.

So, yeah, I could not, I can't drink a Red Bull to save my life. Yeah, it really has a smell to it, doesn't it? I find nowadays I often need to keep one in the car because these days like driving makes me really sleepy. I'm often going up to my mom's house which she lives three hours away i've got two small kids i'm always tired yeah but they do different flavors now so it's okay right so they do like a tropical version and that just tastes like a sort of fizzy sugary tropical drink right so again like with the licorice if we've got nice

flavors of this thing now like which we can use purely for functional reasoning yeah you know for reasons um why the hell are you drinking like the cough medicine version right yes good question and then they have bigger cans of that one and like people drink it on a night out vodka red bull i don't know I can't drink vodka either. But that just sounds like the worst combo. Yeah. I find now with Red Bull, I'll, you know, I might have like a cup of tea or coffee in the morning. I'll set off in the car, have an emergency Red Bull on the way sometimes. It's not even a long journey, three hours, really. But like, it's just something about driving these days as I'm older. You just need it. Yeah.

Yeah. And then sometimes I'll arrive and I'm like I feel insane like there's a fine line and it's just like if I've had a couple of coffees and a Red Bull I'm like oh I feel like I don't know how do I get rid of this I need to like right eat something or like like it's just so mad the amount of crap yeah yeah is your heartbeat really fast as well i just sort of never try and try and see because you know when your heart's beating fast and then you realize it's beating even faster yeah yeah yeah i see that yeah yeah um but uh yeah i mean that's your thing on the island so you're all just because now again just bored go, let's just have a Red Bull just for something to do. Oh, we're just buzzed on licorice and Red Bull.

Our stomachs are horrible. We're going to have a horrible time in the bathroom. It's terrible. School bullies on Red Bull. Oh, yeah. The guy who takes sports too seriously on Red Bull. Your therapist. Therapist on Red Bull.

Not correct. Okay. Well, that's a horrendous food and drink you've got there. So well done, well done. Now, Laura, fortunately, you won't be without entertainment on the island. The plane's entertainment system continues to work, but just your luck, it only has two working settings. One is your least favorite film of all time, and the other is your least favorite song.

What are they and why? Okay. film of all time and the other is your least favorite song what are they and why okay um i think the my least favorite film i'd like to i i'd want to see over and over again is um the absolute madness that is the polar express the animated um nightmare have you ever seen the polar express i haven't seen it i'm afraid but i know of it so um tom hanks is the voice of one of the characters tom hanks yes famously yes um and it's not so much the story it's the animation is very creepy to me anyway and um the way the characters talk and move just sets my, sets me on edge. And I think it became kind of a meme a few years ago on the internet.

Like, can we believe the polar express was a real movie? But I, it's, it's really scary. It's supposed to be this nice Christmas movie for, for children, but I kind of,

I'm like, play it on Halloween. This is no good. Yeah, so I've seen the trailer and I'm sort of vaguely familiar with it. Like, it came out around like 2004, but it looks much, much older than that. It does, yeah. The animation is dated, for sure.

But it's strange because I'm sure other things like Monsters Inc came out around that time it didn't look so weird so it looks like like the lip syncing and stuff is done really well as you'd expect from something from like 2004 but it's like got this weird fuzziness to it that's all yes it does it's like the an aura of like, scary. I don't know. It makes me feel uncomfortable. Do you think it's something to do with the story? Because it's something like he wakes up and goes on this strange train adventure or something. Is it supposed to make it a dreamlike state or something like that, maybe? If I had to watch that over and over again. I think, as I've already mentioned,

maybe I'm doing this too much, but I would throw myself into the ocean. So I've sort of, you know, I'm familiar with the aesthetics. In terms of the content of the film, what are we dealing with? Okay, so I was afraid you were going to ask that because I don't know if I remember a lot of what this movie's about. But in terms of the

content I know there's some sort of Christmas um there's a boy who who is living in a house and it's Christmas and there's a bell on his Christmas tree and um he can't hear the bell um so I don't know if he if it's because he doesn't believe in Santa or something, but like, see, he can't hear the bell overnight. A polar express comes by with Tom Hanks as the conductor. And it's this sort of invisible train to adults or people, or I, I, again,

I don't remember. I'm doing this movie very little justice. Not that it needs justice. I think it's a terrible movie, but he goes on this adventure on this train, meets a bunch of characters, and then goes to meet Santa or the reindeers or his elves.

And then at the end, he hears the bell. I think that sort of device is used a lot with Christmassy things where it's like someone doesn't believe something. So here's quite an elaborate production to prove to this one child that Santa does exist. And you think, I mean,

the idea of Santa, obviously, you know, he's got a lot of work to do in one night and we have to believe that. But then if you think of like the sort of infrastructure around him, where he's taking every, every child who doesn't believe in him, someone from his organization is taking them on this elaborate journey

to sort of really prove the existence. You'd think they could just sort of say, well, look, there he is. Look, I'll show you one Christmas. I'll show you him coming down the chimney. But then you have to promise to go to sleep and not tell all your friends. Yeah, that's insane. It would be much easier, wouldn't it? It would be.

It would be. All these campaign funds just being spent. Also, I would like to just point out, if anyone listens to this and says, Laura does not know the plot of the Polar Express, just know that I called it out before you did. I'm not pretending I know a lot about this movie. All I know is I don't like it.

I think there'd be something quite poignant though as well about having to watch a christmas movie on a desert island and never knowing what day it is yeah and always wondering if you're watching it on christmas oh oh oh wow how touching christmas this could be christmas you choose to watch it on christmas anyway because you don't like the film yeah it's just an added little edge to it i think oh at what point do you think that you could watch a movie every day forever and then would it at some point become enjoyable to watch again do you think i sort of feel like you'd have to like it at some point before you hated it and then for you to like it again at the end i think

if you started off hating it yeah you couldn't learn to love it maybe i don't know maybe it just become your little comforting thing on the island i think i'd end up um yeah i mean i think i'd end up focusing on one different thing every time i watched it like tomorrow i'm gonna watch it and i'm just gonna look at the top left corner of the screen the whole time. Stuff like that. Yeah. But imagine like the weird Red Bull infused dreams combined with that slightly dodgy animation. Truly.

Nightmare. Just getting really strange night terrors from it all. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. And what would your song choice be? Oh, this is controversial, especially because I live in Toronto, but I'm not a fan of Drake.

I'm so sorry. And so God's Plan by Drake is the song that probably I would choose as my least favorite to have on this island. Yeah. How do you feel about Drake? Well, I know very little about him, given what a huge star he is globally. I know almost nothing about him.

But every time I listen to him, I just cannot understand what the fuss is about. Thank you. I completely agree. I know with things like Kanye West, it's like, oh, you know, I don't know all his stuff, but I've heard some stuff of his and I'm like, okay, this is like, you know I don't know all his stuff but I've heard some stuff of

his I'm like okay this is like you know pretty interesting progressive stuff I've heard a couple of Drake tunes and I'm like like I've heard the one you mentioned and heard the Hotline Bling is it called that yeah I just think they're awful I was like what what is this like why you it sounds like I used to love hip-hop and now i'm old i'm in my 40s and i'm one of those people that doesn't understand new mumbly hip-hop yeah i'm like i can't differentiate this between like this and any other mumbly shit that i've heard i like what why are you a genius i don't get it there's just no part of the the the music that I enjoy like melody or lyrics or vocal performance or anything like that um yeah I don't get it either but I guess I can

respect it so many people enjoy it but yeah I just the way I've heard people talking about him I kind of expected it to be a lot more than what I've heard. I mean, I've heard like literally maybe two. I've probably heard more of him and not realized it was him. Sure. But when I have heard it, I've just been so confused. Oh, right. It's just like the sort of mumbly stuff with the vocoder on. Yeah.

Quite sparse. I know. Nothing really happens. Yeah. And like Hotline Bling as well it's like just i don't know it's all his stuff like that yeah i would say so i've had conversations with people who work in like music industry and i've just felt so old where i'm just like seriously it's not as good as it used to be though is it i mean come on is it come on golden era of hip-hop and this come on there's no like great lyricism or like good like it's not even like the instrumentals

go oh yeah i love that james brown tune and you've sampled that and yeah i mean like i say there'll be younger people listening to this going you've old prick but um yeah yeah i mean that sort of thing was so little tonal change forever on a desert island yeah so just not not the emotional catharsis you need from a song no there's just no sort of build or drop or light and shade it's just one note one note for sure yeah okay so drake and what's it called? It's called God's Plan. God's Plan. Okay, okay. Well, that's your entertainment sorted. And Laura, finally, the island is overrun by the biggest dick of all the animals. Which animal is this and why?

I mean, I'm sure you get this a lot. I don't doubt that you've heard this, but a cockroach is the most disgusting animal that exists on the face of the earth i hate cockroaches i'm not sure anyone likes cockroaches i think they're hated by everybody yeah i think like i think luckily in the uk i think you have to have a real sort of sanitation issue if you get them like they're very rare here do you get them much in canada um i think you get them more than you do here um for whatever reason but um there's different kinds and there's i just think any cockroach is a bad cockroach and yeah i've definitely seen them But sometimes they fly as well. And it's like the super cockroaches are big and they fly.

And they don't die. Like they're very, they would be, they would survive. Are they supposed to survive nuclear bombs? That's what we're told, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah. There's certain animal facts like a cockroach can survive a nuclear bomb. A swan can break your arm with its wing.

That's another one. These are like the sort of go-to things about animals. Because, I mean, they don't really do anything. They shouldn't be scary because they can't hurt us. No. So it's annoying that they're so horrible. Yeah, agreed. All they do is reproduce, so horrible yeah i agreed all they do is reproduce i think that's all they do that's disgusting because i have lots of family in australia so when we used

to go and visit when i was young i'd love it but even before i went i'd be worried about like seeing a cop because inevitably i'd have some encounter i remember once being in the shower with one and i couldn't i couldn't get out and i was like oh I remember once being in the shower with one and I couldn't get out. And I was like, oh no, someone in the shower with me. Oh, that's terrible. I think it's the way their antennas move in a very smooth way. Yeah.

And that's, I don't know why that's so freaky. It's freaky. The way they walk, they're fast and crunchy. Yeah, no, I can't handle it. Yeah, they are freakishly fast for their size and then and then some of them can fly as well yeah i think the flying ones you sort of often like they'll just fly into a wall or something so you hear a sort of oh you can hear their bodies yeah and then they sort of plop onto the floor and then they're just scurrying around. Oh, I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, look, I mean, it's a good thing to be on your island because we are making the worst island possible. So imagine having to wipe them off your licorice before you eat it. Oh, this is putting me off. I hate this. No, no. That would be horrible. Yeah.

The listeners won't be able to see the look of genuine panic on your face right now. But I feel like you are really living this experience. And it's time to sort of put you out of your misery. So let's move away from the island. Now. Let's talk about what you're up to at the minute. So as we're recording, you're just finishing off your your dates at the Soho Theatre in London. Yeah, at the Soho Theatre in London yeah at the Soho I'm having so much fun uh the crowds have been amazing it's really nice to be there and it's so cool to be in this sort of iconic space yeah I'm I'm loving it great great and then after that um you're heading back to back to Canada or do you have plans to do in the UK more um so right after London I'll go back to Italy where my parents live I'll just do another little um break and then I'll be back home to

Toronto after that uh until about Christmas so if you're listening to this now then you've very slight chance you can try and get a ticket and I definitely recommend it go and see Laura and Laura thank you so much for coming on Desert Island Dicks today. Thank you so much for having me. I really had a fun time. And I hope you managed to shake off the ickiness of what you've put yourself through. I'll try. I'll talk to my therapist. There you go.

Laura Ramoso there on Desert Island Dicks. We have got more coming up for you as ever because we like to keep them coming, baby. Straight off the production line. Yes, just another reminder that you can get tickets for our live show on the 2nd of november i didn't mention when it was it's the 2nd of november cheerful earful.co.uk to get tickets and it's at the bedford pub in ballam which is in southwest london and it's a lovely place uh to come and hang out and see a show. That's it. Desert Island Dicks has been a Sink Clap production.

It was dreamt up from the mind of James Deacon, who also produced and edited this episode. Thank you, big man. I appreciate it. And a big shout to Chris Attaway, who sometimes edits it as well. And always, always a big shout out to the big man, John Deacon. The Deacon family are a family of good people and he is the figurehead.

That's it for me. Bye bye.