Dice Shame - 126 | 'Last Night - Yes Men'

Episode Date: March 10, 2022

Red and Dorin find themselves deep in the underbelly of Silverymoon when they agree to say "yes" to anything they may encounter... Comedy, action and a whole lot of shaming come together in Dice Shame, an Actual Play Podcast of Storm King's Thunder by Wizards of the Coast! Join our GM Jo; her partner Harlan, his brother Alex & their best friends Justin and Rob as they tackle the daunting world of Faerun in this legendary adventure module! Dice Shame is a podcast that welcomes its audience to the gaming table. Like the games they play at home, they try not to take themselves too seriously. The show aims to be entertaining, inclusive, and irreverent, while still taking the rules (somewhat) seriously. Join us every Thursday morning for brand new episodes available on all major platforms including; Spotify, iTunes, Google Play and more! If you haven't checked it out yet... what are you waiting for?!? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Let's just start saying yes. Let's say yes to more things, okay? Yes. Those bastards! Ah, if they ever catch us, we're locked up for a long time, Maiden. No one will catch us. That cheers! You left without saying goodbye!

Think twice before you just tell someone that you can help them. You've heard of a bug bear in a china shop? I'm a dwarf in a drink house. Welcome back to Dyshame. This is episode 126. Last Night, Part 2, Yes Men. MVP this week is Vance Barnhill for their amazing effort in helping with malevolent and a few updates we've made to the show.

Don't forget to check out malevolent if you haven't already. You can find it at www.mlevelin.com. Thanks, Vance. The Cellar Letters is a weekly horror podcast that chronicles a cross-country move and the eerie feelings of settling into a house with reminence. of past occupants. Explore the house and learn all of its secrets one by one. It's a great show.

All right, should we play some D&D? Let's do it. The city of silvery moon seems held under some spell of serenity. The stillness is pierced by shafts of moonlight and spectral tower. and bridges carved their way through the night air of the forest city. Red and Doran, you find yourselves ambling along the side streets, leading down towards the docks. God, what a serene in simple city. Yeah, totally serene.

In fact, far more serene than I'm used to. Right? Can we both agree that that dinner party was a bit too serene? Yes, that's what I'm saying. And that's what I was trying to get to the bar when we first started. arrive. You know, we have a pulse on this town. Look, it's no yada. Red yells loudly, and I feel like it echoes in the street a little bit. Someone, like, shuts their blinds up above us. Yeah, absolutely. There's like a, shh, from way far away, shh. Yeah. We're in the library of towns.

You need to find a pulse in this damn city. There's got to be a bar, a club, something to give it a little bit. What time is it? I mean, it's six o'clock. Come on. We have met elves in the other parts of this realm that do party. So it's not something that they don't do. Maybe they've got it so deep underground. Let's just wander and meander through the city. Yes. Yes. Now looking around, is there anything open? No, most of the shops are closed. Like Mormons around here. Look, I agree with you. Let's just start saying yes. Let's say yes to more things, okay? Yes. Perfect. And from that, we can find a way to... What is there even a do in this town? All of a sudden, a ring falls down out onto the street from some window above you.

I feel like we walk over. We just stand there looking at it. Now remember, we did just say we would say yes to things, right? Am I wrong? Oh, this is true. And, and you yelled. So, so there's no way I shouldn't pick up this ring, right? We did say yes to anything.

If there's a better way for fate to say that I should pick up this ring right now, I can't imagine it. So it's not stealing. Look, here's what we'll do. I'll pick it up, and Red picks up the ring, but he doesn't put it on. I'll put it in my pocket. And if we come across anyone who lost the ring, or if we pass a sign that says if you found a ring, we'll give it back. Of course, of course. But if no one asks what's in my pocket, or says they're missing a ring, we keep it.

That's right. Deal. And Doran's like, and if nobody asks what's in my pocket, and he like leans down to his breast pocket with his mouth. and he's like, nobody has to know what's in my pocket. Do you want a little bit of my pocket, red? Did you take some red wine from Jack's mom's house? We'll give her back whatever.

Look, Doran, and I pull up my water skin. I took a little white. And I also slip down. And then so we cheers kind of in a very... Cheers. You know what? We'll make our own fun. First yes down, next yes to go.

Let's find some fun. Yes. You continue wandering the streets of silvery moon, and you find yourself back at the docks where you came in earlier today. A medium-sized cargo vessel is moored under the moon shadows of an overhanging pine tree. It's gangway out and a few crates stacked on the dock. On deck, an old man struggles with an oversized item that's wrapped in canvas. His gray hair is plastered to his face with sweat,

and he flips up an eye patch to scrub at his face revealing a hollow socket. He bends again and tries to shoulder the burden unsteadily grabbing for somewhere to find purchase on this item. Doran feeling a little bit now a little bit woobly and wobbly, not so much drunk, says, now look at this boat down here. That's not a small cargo boat and that's not a large cargo boat. That's more of what you would call a medium-sized boat. cargo boat when it's a schooner hey look at that man he's struggling we should help him shouldn't we and then we look at each other yes yes yes oh yes yes yes second yes of the night i will help him yes new philosophy i like where your heads at the yes boys cheers cheers and red hops over the like

half stone wall yeah you hop over it and doran like runs around to like Where are the entrances. Hey, old man. Hello there. Oh, hi. Good evening. How are you doing? I'm doing fine.

My friend and I couldn't help but notice that you were struggling a little bit. That's right. And, uh, and, well, I, uh, he like straightens up from his, his labor. He's like, well, I'm, I'm just, I'm not as young as I used to be. Let us help you. And Dern walks up and immediately gets underneath the box and lifts the majority of the weight off the man's, hands, allowing him to still kind of guide the box.

Actually, if you don't mind, do you have a minute? Of course. And Doron kind of stands there with it on his back. Can I set it down, maybe, or? Well, actually, if you don't mind, you can just take it straight inside. And he points at a storefront across the way, and it's got, its door is like, propped open. No worries, friend. We'll bring it right in for you.

Our pleasure. And Red sort of, like, gives him a little salute. guides the way as Doren carries this heavy box up the stairs, Redmond making no help whatsoever. He follows you concerned about this parcel that Doren is carrying, and he sort of like scurries in front of you to make sure that the door is open wide enough. Don't worry, my friend, we are capable. My friend here carried an entire giant ruin just earlier today.

Is you okay? Can I set it down? Actually, just one more. minute. It won't take long, please. Just further. And he leads you to a hatch in the floor of this shop. There's an unfolded wooden staircase that heads down to a stone corridor, and it's becoming more obvious that this brief favor is going to require more of you than you had initially. You know, Redd, that's okay. We're saying yes to things, right? Doran, it's fine. Yes, yes, of course. But, you know, you mentioned that big boulder I carried. I forgot. I carried that for so long. You're doing so great. You're so strong. This is a wonderful shop. Is this your shop? I don't recognize. What do you sell here? I don't...

He just kind of grunts at you and leads the way down into this narrow passageway. Right. Yes, down here. Come on. You're burdened with this heavy, awkward object. So you have to move single file into the darkness. He's like, oh, no, just ahead. He leads you through the passageway underneath this shop. And down, an expanding series of left and right turns. Oh, right here, yeah. You're doing great Doran, don't worry. I'll try to massage your cossicks. Are you helping it all, Red? I'm massaging his...

What's it called? Coxix. You mean his butt? Yeah. Yeah, okay. The coxis. Coxix? I got nothing.

You know what? I'm massaging Doran's butt. You're doing great money. He leads you through two different doors on which he knocked. and then awaits an answer before proceeding. And then finally, you come to a larger chamber. Here must be where we're putting it down. I feel like Doran is so distracted by the stress and the pain,

and Red is so distracted by just trying to keep Doran happy that we haven't realized how far and complicated our path has become. Finally, you come to a larger chamber that's lit by torch and candlelight, and he leads you into the chamber, and he's like, Just here, please. Oh, yeah, of course. Doran let it down pretty heavily. Good job, Doran.

Good job. Feel good. Yeah, relax. Okay, well, don't lie down here. Just take it easy. Look, there's a sack of potatoes here. Just sit down and relax. I tried to help.

I'm sorry. I'll tell you, Red, if it weren't for the drinks that we've had, I probably would be in a little bit more pain. And speaking of which... Yeah. Yeah, let's switch. You take some white and I'll take some red. Yeah, okay. You're standing beside a series of raised pools that reflect shimmering mirages of light up into the white stone ceiling of a large bathing house.

Some of the pools steam gently and the odor of a hot spring permeates throughout the room. There's about 10 people standing nearby beside a huge pile of boxes and crates. and as the old man nods his thanks to you, he hustles back off through the passage that you came from. Hey, hey, Doreen, and Red helps you up from the sack of potatoes. Maybe we found our party after all. You know, a soak and a scrub doesn't sound too bad, eh? Hey, no, it doesn't, especially on my sore muscular back here.

That hot water looks mighty relieving. I think we can get behind this. Look, we'll order a few more drinks, we'll stretch out, We'll have a little boy's night, maybe you have some... I like what you're saying here, and if we continue on with our saying yes, then I have to say, yes, let's do it. Yes, I'm in with you, bud.

A muscled half-elf man comes over to you, and he's like, holy shit, that's a big one. Great job, guys. Thank you so much for your help. Hey, yes, no problem. Good thing that you finally made it, hey? Better late than never, I say. Yeah, yeah.

What are they hot stones or something? Something? Like, what's, maybe those... Doran, one of those rocks cold and, you know, sarnas, they pull water on them. There's some next to them, I don't know. Oh, excuse me. Um, hot rocks.

Anyway, yeah, we're glad we could help. He turns to the rest of the people down in this huge echoing chamber. All right, you ugly bastards, Emeris's men have finally joined us. Wanted to just take a second and congratulate all of you on this hall. Y'all really outdid yourselves. Brunay reported very little pursuit on this one, so it looks cleaner than last time and the big cheer erupts in the room, someone pops a bottle and starts passing it around and as you look at the crowd of people, you realize that they look pretty rough.

I feel like Doran and I do a slow look towards each other. Yeah, and when he says Emeris's men, I feel like Dern and Red kind of look at each other and look behind us as if, and then we look at each other. You're waiting for Emers' men to come right? Well, we're not exactly. And red cups your mouth. Hold on, just relax. And they're like, oh, if they ever catch us, we're locked up for a long time,

Maiden. But they'll never catch us. I feel like a bottle of champagne is like thrust in front of us. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, they don't ever catch us. The dirty bastards. No one will catch us.

Cheers to you. And cheers to me. You guys too. Do you want to get a hell out of here. One of them like, grabs a crowbar and starts to try to open one of the crates and then the big half-elf man like swats it out of his hands

is like you know the rules unspoiled goods unspoiled it's not our business what's in here Doron just hang back and Red sort of takes like a half step into the shadows trying to avoid some of the and there's like a dude back there and he's like so uh so

your emeris is man eh yeah us and emiris we go way back how's he doing these days oh you know been a long time since I ran with him Well, you know. Oh, well, yeah. I mean, well, you got his hand chopped off. Yeah.

He did. Yeah. Oh, he did. Oh, yeah. Big battle with the wargs. And, uh, and works. Yeah. Remember?

But, but, but, but, not, not, it wasn't a bad battle. It was, it was, um, it's a bar, bar fight. Yes. Yeah. Well, it was a bad bet. It wasn't, I don't know if he lost it. No, no, no, I think I've lost it. Have you, have you had some of this champagne?

Here, try some of this. Oh, yeah, here. I mean, are you guys trying to bluff correctly? Yeah, I'll do a deception. Yeah, do a deception roll for me. That's a 19. All right, he just thinks you know Emeris, but you're very awkward men. Plus three.

That's a 22. Excellent. Good job. He's like, all right, well, tell him, I say hi. Yeah. Oh, we will. We will, of course. We'll tell him that you said hi.

Yeah, and we'll tell his hand to get better too. And I pull, like I pulled Doran aside, it's like, listen, a little course on deception. You don't add anything major to it. Just keep it vague, you know, be as vague as possible. Noted. At that moment, something zips through the room and impales a woman standing near you through the neck. Blood bubbles out of her mouth. And she sinks to her knees.

The room erupts in chaos. A figure drops down from some hiding place on the ceiling and lands wolfish in a pool of red and black cloak. The closest smuggler launches himself at her in a frenzy. His scimitar surprisingly well handled for some garden variety thug. But she spins with a long white-handled dagger in each hand and meets his fury, steel, screaming against steel, until she pivots and slides in right alongside him,

plunging the blade in smoothly between his ribs and pulling back towards his spine, dropping him. The white dagger, dripping in blood, she points the blade around the room and snarls. What have you done with my sister? The dark elf before you is dressed for stealth and the purpose of killing, with a cowl pulled up and obscuring the lower half of her face,

her red eyes flashing in triumph. She has little time to say anything else before her attention is redirected to the remaining thugs who close in around her. Everyone roll for initiative. Nice. Cool introduction.

All right, Harlan, would Red get? 15. Doran? End in 11. I kind of had this image that Doran's like already staring to undress and so like his bit too much. Because of the hot springs?

Yeah, yeah. Like he had already started unlacing his leather. I so want you to just jump in the water to escape somebody mid-combat. All right, so this chick goes first, this drow woman. She's surrounded by, you know, half a dozen of these smugglers. And she sheathes her white daggers, and she makes a flourish with both hands. And from these black bracers that surround her forearms, these two knives just spring into her hands and she throws them both simultaneously at two of the smugglers in front of her. Oh, that's cool.

Cool is right. She hits both of them, and they each have to make constitution saves because it would seem that her blades are coated with some kind of fluid, poisonous fluid. Some poisonous. One failure, one success. Poisonous, poisonous, poisonous. And they stumble back with these daggers lodged in their ribcage. All right, Red, what do you do? Red turns around and looks next to him, and I think he flips a table, and he pulls Doren

behind it with him as the two of them sort of like crouches these daggers are clinking off steel, and I imagine a guy with a dagger in his neck like stumbling back and over the table as we're keeping our heads down, and I'm like, Doren, let's just stay out of the fray until we figure out what the hell's going on. Yeah, agreed. And, you know, just keep an eye out for any rolling bottles of booze because, hey, free booze, right? We were looking for a party. Yeah, yeah. And Red takes a glug of champagne. Yeah, me too, bud.

Doran, it's your turn. Do you just hide? I hunker down. I kind of continue the conversation. You know, it's sometimes nice, not really having any skin in the fight. You know, just kind of watching what goes on. You know, I'm not going to say I'm really afraid. No, me neither. I'm more of just like, I'm unencouraged. to join the fight because really at the end of the day who really hasn't? And then maybe my conversation's interrupted by the

crashing of a person. Yeah, one of the thugs like jumps over the side of the table and lands beside you Doren he's got a dagger in his thigh and he's panting really hard and he's like come on guys, we need you. Yeah, you're doing great. Don't worry about it.

And he stands up and then he just gets a dagger in the neck and falls over dead beside you. Anyway, I agree, Doren. Ultimately, it's kind of nice to be a sidekick. Hey, but you know what? I am wondering. And Red sort of like preens his neck over Doran behind the crates. And he's like, maybe we should see exactly what we're getting into.

Yeah, I agree. And then Doran kind of starts to crouch and he turns back while he's crawling. Imagine it's just something like fish or like, you know, a container of wooden pieces? I mean, who's going to know? It's probably fish. Doran's going to try and stealth. But like crawling on his hands and knees is like, The fray is happening around him, yeah.

So I'm going to go for stealth, and I'm rolling a 16 here. Oh, not bad. That's pretty good for Doran. I'm proud of you. Good job, Doran. I can barely see you. You do like a little somersault, maybe?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He, like, pulls himself across, like, swimming in water, but on the concrete floor. Yeah, and then turns into a somersault and rolls half away. Like, as you make your way across the room, like a man just, Like, it's like thrown through the air. It's a little helm screamed out of it.

Yeah, exactly. Cool, yeah, you make your way over to these crates. You want to take a look inside one of them? Mm-hmm. You can hack it apart with Ork splitter if you want, or you can try to pry it open if you want it to be a little bit more, like, discreet. Doran discreetly butts one of the planks of this crate. With the butt of his axe, just like knock a hole in it, basically.

Crack one of these planks so you can pier these. Nice. God, I really want to say that there's geese in there. Geese, geese, geese, geese for sale. That would be so funny, imagine. So you bash open this hole in the side of the crate, and at first it's kind of hard to see. It looks like just mundane provisions.

It looks like just mundane provisions. Oh, well, then who cares? Roll an insight check for me. And that's going to be 17. Nice. Nice. So the way that they're bundled together, it's clear to you now that these provisions are meant to be handed out in parcels, like some kind of humanitarian aid. Come on back then. I got more champagne here. Wait a minute. They're not just ordinary provisions. They look like they're going somewhere.

So on the side of the box, Doran, as you crawl around, it says Everland, care of the baker. Red. What? And Doran continues to, like, stealthily crawl on his hands and knees all the way back across the room as there's bandits flying and falling around him. He gets all the way back behind the table and he says, I think it's, I think it's provisions going to Everland. It said, for the baker.

You know what that means? Yeah, orphans. What? That's right. Those bastards! Red says and stands up, revealing himself from behind the table. Those were provisions meant for the orphans. And I think I carried it all the way down here.

And I stand up with you too. Hey, Doran, let's kick some ass. Yeah. You stand up firing your eyes ready to address this horde of miscreants to find that they are all lying on the ground, bleeding in pools of their own intestines. Oh. Oh.

There is one standing figure, however, the drow woman, and she turns to face you. Oh, shit, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And we both put up our hands. Oh, look, look. Wrong place, wrong time. We just kept saying yes to things, and we are totally innocent. In fact, my friend just discovered that the provisions here are in large part due to us. Yes.

No, no, no, I mean, I don't mean that's why they're here. Well, I mean, we did bring them down here. Yes. But I mean that the reason they should be going in. That's right. She stalks towards you. daggers in her hands. Who the hell are you? My name is Redden. This is my best friend Dawn, and my best friend, uh, there's just two. There are not, there are two other best friends

aren't here, but, uh, you, um, we're good. Um, and we certainly have no affiliation with any of the, uh, the party that you just, uh, looking around, you kind of, well, you did a great job, frankly. We're very impressed. Something. In fact, work, it mires work. And, uh, believe me, we've done some work. Yes. Uh, what's your name? Salon Banrier. Oh.

Nice to meet you. Very nice. Why did you kill everybody? I mean, they did deserve it, but you mentioned something about your sister? You hear footsteps coming down the corridor and, like, far off, shouting. You can come with me, but you'd better not make a racket or we're all dead. Is that clear? Crystal, clear as glass.

Clear as water. I can be quiet as a mouse. Didn't you see me sneak across the floor there? You probably didn't, because he did it so well. That's right. By the way. I'm really impressed by me. Okay.

She's just standing there looking at the two of you, like, Okay. She walks off to a corner of the room and finds a grate in one corner and just starts kicking at it until it clatters to the ground. She ducks inside, not waiting for you, just heads off down this tunnel. We've got two options. Red turns towards the door where the footfalls are coming from. Don't know how many are there. We do know how many are in there.

Say yes one more time. Yes. Let's do it, friend. Yeah. Red climbs into the tiny little hole that makes him very uncomfortable. And Doran climbs in after, grabbing the grate off the ground and pushing it back up into the hole for maximum. You know what, Doran? Inspiration. Hey!

Cute. Good, great grabbing. Nice. Great good grabbing. Great, great grating. She leads you through a service corridor which reeks of salt and sewage through a complex maze of tunnels, her right hand grazing the pebbly surface of the wall. beside her absent-mindedly. Hey, Salon, wait up!

We're right behind you. I mean, wait up. Quietly. Yeah, come on, Doran. Shh. Hey, we just want to say, thank you for not trying to kill us, or at least hearing us out.

That was a very noble and kind thing to do. You must have a really good judge of character simply based on looks, because, really, we had our weapons out and everything, but you still didn't kill us. Yeah. You gave us the benefit of a doubt. Great trigger discipline there.

I gotta honor that. That was really respectful. Yeah, you have a lot of restraint. That's very important. impressive in a fighter like yourself. She turns around silhouetted against the dark background of this tunnel. She's like,

I reserve my judgment until we have some time to talk. But now is not that time. Totally fair. No, definitely. That was on me. Sorry. Normally, we don't have this sort of bad timing, but we're missing two party members. They're the ones that have the good timing and the forethought. They fill a lot of space

between conversations, so... Yeah, technically I think you're more the one to be reserved, Red. But I think... Well, I try to be, but it's only because Jack's... Are you drunk? No. Well, defy... I mean, it's such a...

For me to be really drunk. Exactly. How long do you see me drunk? Well, we've got to have at least more than one. Not really drunk. I'm more just more than this. She's gone already. She's gone again.

Oh, shit. Come on. Let's drink. Let's go. The architecture changes. The echoes grow more vast. The planes of the walls and floor become more rigid, exact. Perfectly. measured. A flat stone door opens to reveal a startling room. Four pillars support an arched ceiling

of carved stone done in ancient dwarven style. A set of double doors would exit the room on the opposite side, but for the makeshift barricade of an iron chest and toppled and broken stone statue would shore the door from the inside. Wow. She's already there when you make your way through. Yep. Hey, this is pretty nifty. What the hell is this place? I don't even have to guess. This is dwarven carvings, I can tell you, just by looking at it. Hey.

This is my culture right here in this room. She nods at the broken statue and she says, well, I'm sorry about that then. Yeah, that's pretty shameful. And looking at the broken statue lying on the floor, any idea who it is? You can roll religion. Don't tell me it's more than. That's going to be nine. Yeah, you're not sure

Maybe it was too long ago Or from some creed That you're not familiar with No Hey, at least you're not using the head In your fireplace to cook food on it That's right, hey This was out of necessity

I don't possess the muscles That your friend does Oh, he's not a practicing dwarf anyway So you're fine That's right, well, I mean, I do follow Moradin But this is not Moradin I can tell Like tangentially, you know This room is clearly being used by this woman

As a safe house There's a bed roll and a backpack on one side. She's got some clothes, like crumpled up. It's kind of messy in here, actually. She fetches a water skin and drinks from it. Would you like some light? I'm fine without it, but I don't mind if you want it. Hey, sure, little knight, my little, yes.

Sure, I mean, I'm fine without it as well, but simply for the mere fact of atmosphere. See, I'm a bit of an atmosphere type. Yeah, he always pushes out beds together. She casts some minor magic and a few orbs of light, just emerge and hover around the ceiling, casting a nice glow in the room. Well, that's sort of nice. She's lovely. You're a magic one.

We've got a couple of those in our crowd as well. Dark elves have innate magics. I'm not particularly skilled. Oh, okay. These are dwarven ruins. Doran, you said? That's right. And this is red.

Hello? They occupy much of the ground underneath silver. moon. The surface elves just built straight on top of them, and they've been forgotten. See? Did I mention this earlier? I said, I guarantee there's got to be something

underneath this city. I knew it. Yes, you're right. I owe you something, or other. And Red Walks over and shuts the stone door that we just left. Look, Salon, we appreciate that you, you know, brought us with you. We were a little bit in over our heads. Look, the truth of the matter is, we were just trying to help somebody, and, you know, it kind of got off the race.

I didn't realize that we were helping some bad people. You just go around helping just random people. Well, look, my friend and I were looking for a little bit of fun, and we decided to make a little game out of it. We were looking for maybe an underground party, and quite frankly, we thought we had found it until we realized that the party that we were involved with were a group of criminals, and then you came and killed them all.

So it sort of did work out well. I suppose it did. Yeah, we just wanted to say yes to him. everything. So we started saying yes to many things. I found a ring. We helped some people. We got in trouble and we followed you. Yeah, we followed you. Ended up all right. I'm glad that I came in when I did. That could have been a lot of trouble for you. Now we can handle ourselves. Well, I suppose so. Tell me, drow. What are you doing here? You seem to be hiding out. Are you living here? Why don't why don't you live above with the rest of your elven kind? Oh, those are not my kind.

Red walks over to one of the bed rolls and, like, sits cross-legged. She crouches down beside you, Red. You see that there's some blood seeping from a wound in her shoulder, and she starts digging through her pack, putting together a little pile of things as she speaks to you, a cotton bandage, sewing needle, some thread, ointment, and she starts unbuckling the armor from her left side to tend to this wound. She's like, well, I came here not long ago,

for my sister, as you heard. Her name is Istogal. And I feel like in this world, drow are kind of as uncommon as tabaxi, right? Maybe someone has seen one of them 10 years ago, but they're quite remarkable on the surface. So if you've seen another drow woman in silvery moon, it would have been her, you know what I mean?

I'm afraid that my sister is in some trouble. She's a member of the hand of Yarder, or so my sources tell me that she still is, and she was sent up here to investigate this missing cargo. It went by way of Yarder, and nothing goes through there without the hand taking a cut. The losers in the bathhouse obviously thought that they could pull a fast one and absconded with the shipment. I heard talk of another drow and silvery moon yesterday, but I'm worried that something terrible has happened to her. If she was still a free woman, those crates never would have been unloaded. So I have to find her. You said the hand?

That sounds familiar. Where have we heard that before, Doran? The hand. The hand, the hand, the hand. I feel like we have heard the hand before. Yeah, yeah. How familiar are you with organized crime? Um, we've come across it.

Oh, our friend, uh, well, friend, that's a bit of a stretch, but Zulkin, he was talking about the hand, wasn't he? That's right, yeah. And Yarder, that's the town with all the casinos and whatnot, right? Yeah, it's a great town. The underground casino? Quite an underworld, let me tell you. Yeah, we all got tattoos there, actually. You did?

Yeah. Can I see them? Well, sure. And Red Lake brings his up, because his moves, it's a magic tattoo. So he brings it up to, like, his neck. Just kind of crawls up his skin. See? And then it goes back.

That is well done. Yeah, we paid a hefty price for it. Dorn shows off his tattoo. And yours as well. Why, thank you. Do you recall the name of the artist who gave you these? No. You know, it's really too bad that you didn't meet us.

You know, we're not the named people. We don't remember. The other side of the party, they're the name people, were there? Are you adventurers? Yes. That makes a lot of sense based on how willing you were to get in trouble earlier. Well, that's just it. You mentioned about helping people, and quite frankly, that's sort of our vibe.

Yeah. She grits her teeth as she starts to knit her flesh back together with the needle and thread, having cleaned her wound. Your sister, you said that they were the lead that a shipment came through. What are you going to try next? I'm not sure. I'm a bit out of options. I should have kept a prisoner upstairs. Just to find out. Listen, we've been there.

Let me tell you. You always forget And then you're right there Too late Takes away What if we What if we walked back up around Took a different route out of here

I'm sure you've got one It's not a bad idea And we take a look at that ship And see if we can find any Remains pieces Maybe your sister left behind If she was on the ship Yeah

If she was part of the hand And Red stands up From his cross-legged position Under Bedroll The hand Will you part of them too then? I was, yes. I used to be about 10 years ago. It's a hard thing separating yourself from a criminal organization, and I couldn't stay in Yarder.

They would have killed me, so I went down to water deep to the Zentorum. There's some crazy shit going on there these days, though. You heard of the dark tide? It doesn't matter. They only hire changelings. All I mean to say is that there's a deep, dark underbelly to any town with more than 10 villagers to its name, and you'd better be careful where you end up lending a hand here or otherwise. You think twice before you just tell someone that you can help them, because you don't

know who they are. Well, you know, our style is more like help them and then get double-crossed. I mean, if I could tell you stories of Zulkin, you'd probably think we were bigger idiots than we are. Well, maybe I shouldn't, but I do trust you. I mean, you seem pretty straightforward. forward with why you're here. I mean, you jumped down, you killed a bunch of people. Yeah, you kill some people. You're good in our books, so long as the people were bad. He said you're looking for your

sister. I know what it's like when you've got family members in danger. Are you looking for someone, Doran? No. But I'll tell you, this guy right here, and he puts an arm on a hand on Red's shoulder. He's like a brother to me, and I'll tell you, if you went missing, I sure as hell would feel

pretty bad. I mean, I felt bad before. Damn straight. And if Dorn went down, he'd do the same. So you know what? Hey, we don't have anything tonight. And Dorn and I are still saying yes to everything. We're with you. We can help you trying to find your sister. We don't have to give up so easy. If you want two knuckleheads to help you out. Let's say yes this last time to helping somebody. Hey, Red, at least here in this town. Agreed. Look, we got some connections in town. Why don't we skiddle out of here? Maybe we can see what Jack's mom knows. We can try to find something. I'm sure somebody's seen something. something. Let us help you in any way we can. All right, let me just get my things together. Sure. And then the sound of something falling to the ground immediately precedes an explosion of flame and smoke that shatters the stillness, engulfing half of the room.

Red and Doran make a dexterity saving throw. Oh, man. Oh, no. That's not good. 16. All right, Doran. Four. No.

You die. Dora never came back Doren, you take 14 fire damage And red, you take seven Oh, boy So this like ball of fire erupts in the room And salon stuff is in the epicenter Her bed roll catches on fire

She like leaps from it like a cat Whoa! Red dives behind a stone pillar As the fire singes his hair What the hell's going on? Doran looks cartoonish and let his face is all gone sooty black and his beard is smoldering. Whoa. We have to get out of here now.

What? What's going on? I don't understand. They found us. We're not safe. Who the hell? The hand? No, the smugglers.

God damn it! The door starts to shudder and crash with the force of some battering ram. The rubble that's been pushed up against it starts to fall off and the splinters start emerging on the door. All right, Dorn. I'll take them as they come to the right. You get to the left. Oh, yeah. And Red draws his bow getting ready to fire out whatever comes through that door.

Salon is like, no, we can't hold this. She looks around the room, and then she points at a ladder that leads up to a hatch in the ceiling. I feel like there's a moment of hesitation. Red looks to the door, looks to the ladder. All right, come on, Doren. And he gets to the bottom of it to boost Doren. Yeah, and Doren places his foot into Red's hand and lunges up towards the ladder. Here we go.

Come on, Red. I'm right behind you, don't worry. And Red scampers of the ladder directly behind. Come on, Saran. Solan! Salon! Salon! Damn it! I'm doing it now. See, this is why we need Jack and Kraylaw there.

And then we see a sewer cover slides aside from the darkness within and outclim Salon, Red, and Doran. You're standing on the night streets of Silvery Moon again. There's stars glinting above you in the sky, and you're all just, like, charred. to shit. All right. Let's

uh... Jesus. Why don't we make our way back to Jack's mom's house because... No, you shouldn't be seen with me. It's not fair to get you caught up in this business. It's fine.

We want to help you. They shouldn't... Oh, quiet you. There shouldn't be the fault of one stupid old man with an eye patch that we decided to help. That's not your fault. It's our dumb faults.

No. Yes. We wanted an adventure. And she's like, did you say a man with an eye patch? Well, yeah. Yeah, I think so. I don't know.

Doran got a better look at him. That's the man I took the box off of. Yeah, he had a big old dead eye patch, and he was kind of old in a beard, I think. A human man. Yeah. Brunei. I can't believe it, that two-timing fuck. I think I know exactly where we can find him this time of night.

She starts walking down the street. He worked with a hand back when I ran for them. I'm surprised he's still alive if he's in the habit of smuggling for someone else. or maybe they've gone soft. Let's do it. Well, with you. And kind of following along, Adoran's like kind of eager now.

Do you think maybe you know where your sister is? Do you think if we find him, we might find your sister? Do you think... Look, if he knows anything, we're going to do everything we can to get information out of him, and I can promise you that.

Yes. And you can count on my axe. And my bow. Up one street and down another, Salon leads you to a large building nestled in the roots of some giant oak tree. There are lights on inside,

and the sign above the door proclaims you have found the new epic distillery. Yeah, all right, I'll take the right back, Dorn. The thing Red and Dorn are trailing behind still drinking from their wine skins. All right. Getting ready to battle. That's right.

I love being in battle drunk. Me too. We don't get to do it enough with a goody two shoes looking over our shoulders all the time. I know. everything just goes down so much more smoothly. You don't feel that pain the next morning. Agreed.

Wait, where is she? Oh, shit. She's like kicking the door in just as you guys like scurry up. Hold on, hold on, hold on, salon, salon, salon, slon. Listen, Doran kicks the doors in. Give him this. He needs it. That's right.

Stand back. And then should I roll for a string? No, you can kick a Doran. That's like your whole fucking thing. That's right. Come on, buddy. I'm rubbing your shoulders. I'm like, look, give this.

one good kick. And before you do, remember, don't pop the first thing that moves. Right. Show the restraint that she showed us. That's right. There might be a drow in there that needs a sister. And Doran takes a drink of his wine. Doran kicks the Doran. All right, everyone roll initiative. Ooh, 22. Salon rolled a natural 20. Oh, she deserves it. I've been rolling nines. That's another 11 for me.

Right, Doran. You kick the door in to this distillery, and you are greeted by a number of surprised faces, thugs who are sitting at tables in this draft house, who are hoisting beers surround you. There's probably about 12 of them all sit at tables, and there are these huge vats behind them, the workplace of the distilled.

Hillary. And a couple of doors lead out of the room. In the back, you see, there is a drow woman who is tied up and she's sitting at a table. The man is standing over her. It appears that they are deep in conversation. And the dude with the eye patch is sitting at a table, like right beside the door that you just kicked open. Well, I think this is the place. Salon rushes through the door. She shakes her hands again to, like, load daggers into her hands from these magical bracers that she has, and she flings them at the two nearest thugs. Um, yeah, she definitely hits both of the smugglers that she was aiming for and deals. Well, so any hit the drow assassin scores against the surprise creature is a crit. Nice. Um, so she, she just murders two people. Yeah,

One knife goes right in the guy's throat And then the other one gets him in the forehead And they'll keel right over Nice Red, it's your turn Red barrels in past the door Turning the corner with his bow Sees the guy in the chair

That we spotted at the boat And he draws back on his bowstring He says, You left without saying goodbye! And let's go of his bow As it like sinks into his one good eye Nice, roll to hit Oh, good one 18 to hit? For sure

16 damage Mm-hmm He drops his drink and he goes down. That's for taking food from off, you dick. And as he's down, I pull back and I shoot him again in the back of the head. With a natural 20. Yeah.

Red pulls back in the bone, he says, Bet you didn't see this one coming. And he lets the arrow loose as it sticks them to the floor. All right, Doran, what do you do? Doran wields his axe, but looking at Red and looking at Salon, they both are able to attack from afar. So Doran prompts his own quip, and he says, well, you've heard of a bug bearer in a china shop? I'm a dwarf in a drink house, and he barrels in.

Directly, I'm going to say directly, to the man that's talking to Salon's sister. Yeah, the man seeing you approach takes this defensive stance. He pulls a sword out from his scabbard. In a charge, Doran raises his axe above his head and attacks the man. Roll to hit. With 28. Oh, I love this. Vengeance, you guys are wreaking.

I love the idea that maybe you're between two large casks. Yeah. And like maybe you're using them to like jump between. Like you jump up on one on the other. Oh, like a Jackie Chan thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I do that with a 28. Yeah, 28 hits.

I jump and bounce from one keg to another keg. Like a wall kick. Yeah, wall kicking off the kegs and come down upon. on this bad guy with my ass. That's going to be 16 points of damage for the first attack. And then landing, after cracking my orc splitter across his skull, I hit him with another 21. Yep.

Doing another 10 points of damage. Awesome. Putting my axe head into his waist. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. He is terribly injured, but not down yet. You see the relief wash over this drow woman's face who's tied to a chair next to you. It is her turn.

She's going to use her turn to try to escape from her bonds now, seeing that her sister and her rescuers are here. Not bad. She manages to sort of get one arm free, and you can see her struggling against these ropes. Meanwhile, it's Salon's turn. seeing Doran's acrobatics and not to be outdone, she gets up on top of a table

and kicks one of these smugglers in the face. That's another natural 20. Nice. Fuck yeah. So, yeah, she knocks him unconscious, and then she pulls out her two white daggers from her waistband, and she just goes to town,

the guy next to him, plunging it into his sternum. That's another natural 20. No fucking way Holy shit That's awesome Good thing you're rolling on our team I know right

Yeah okay She's just a whirlwind of death Like stabbing the dagger over and over again Red it's your turn Red spins around and fires an arrow At the guy approaching Doran behind him With an 18 hit Nice

And I picture there's like a hand reaching up Holding a dagger that's gonna go into Doran's back and Red just pins him to the cask, his hand dropping the knife. And then, like, spirits starting to leak out, Doran spins around and, like, takes a mouthful, just... Yes, yes. Swallows hard, it gives me the thumbs up before I pull back on the arrow and peg the guy in the head with a 19 hit. Mm-hmm. And that's going to be a nine damage.

But it doesn't stop there, because as you're winding up to do your second amount of damage, Doran grabs a goblet off the table and fills it with the spirits and tosses it across the room in such a way that it very little spills only for Red to catch it. And Red catches it. Bottoms up, Doran.

And he takes it down. And Doran continues to drink out of the... It's actually the thugs turns now. Red, two of them jump on you with their scimitars drawn trying to slice you down. Bring it on, Dickweeds. Yeah, that's 22.

to hit you? 22 hits. 15 slashing damage. And then the other one. Ooh, that's another natural 20. These guys are attacking with advantage is why. That's a lot of natural 20s. Yes.

I really like this yellow dice with the black numbers. Yeah. 17 slashing damage, red. Ooh, getting hurt here. And then the dude who is interrogating the drow sister, he's going to try to attack you, Doran, with a 17 to hit you. I have a 17th, so it hits.

Yep. Five slashing damage. The alcohol helps. That's right. Oh, yes, it does. And then a 14 to hit, so he misses you. Yes, correct. Excellent.

All right. Doran, it's your turn. Doran immediately attacks the man that just attacked him, hoping to take him down so that he can go and help his buddy Red. And I think that's a hit with a 24. I should say so, yes. 15 points of damage. Yeah, you kill him.

Yeah, and I chop his head right off. I'm coming over there, Red. Blood sprays all over the cask beside you and just mix with the alcohol that's running free. It's kind of like sluces down the side. But Doran jumps up on the table and chops the rope that's got the woman's hands tied. Nice.

Nice. I'm coming, Redd, and barrels across the room and attacks the nearest person to him. Awesome. 14? Yeah, you do. Nice. These guys are only wearing hide armor, so. Thank goodness.

17 points of damage. Excellent. Good. Thanks, buddy. No problem, Red. We got this. It's Istagal's turn. She doesn't have any weapons, but she picks up the chair that she was tied to, and she

leaps into the fray with. ferocity. She is going to make some improvised weapon attacks. Yeah. She misses twice. Oh no. She's not used to chair. I don't blame her. Her hands are like numb from being tied up for so long. You know how that gets. Oh yeah. When you're tied up for a long time. Um, Salon's turn, she throws one of her ivory knives and it embeds itself into the cask beside where Istagal is. And her sister like yanks it out. So now she, She has an actual dagger. Nice. So there's two guys beside Red, and there's one guy across from where Salon is on the table. And she's just going to stab him right in the face.

Something about headstabs is bad. So satisfied. Especially from a drow. Yeah, drow headstabs are the worst. I rolled four, sixes, and a five. Oh, wait, that's great. On a D6. Oh, wow.

Wow. Wow. Something about my rolls tonight. I'm just, I'm on fire. And I can't explain. Yeah, so the guy is basically just dead. But there's something about the way you roll tonight. Red, it's your turn.

Red takes a shot with disadvantage at the man in front of him, the one that Doran hit. A, 18 hit. Yep. 11 damage. I grab the arrow and I jab him in the eye. And I keep saying, you're going to be like your friend, except he's dead now. Sorry. And I'm going to use my fleet of foot to move back five feet.

And then fire at him again. The first one killed him. Perfect. Well, then I'm going to fire out the other guy without disadvantage. And that would be a 16 hit. Yep. 25 damage. Wow, yeah.

He's going to try and run away. So Doren, you can take an attack of opportunity against this guy if you want, but he's going to make a B-line for the door. Doran attacks with a 26 to hit. Chasing him down. He's not going to get far. Normally, I don't like to stad people in the back, but... Yeah, you kill him.

He's dead. It's like Kill Bill in here. There's like blood all over the walls and the tables. Yeah. Red's panting covered in blood himself. He tries to step down from the bar and slips. And he falls like head first into a keg, breaking it open and pouring spirits all over himself. He stands up dripping with alcohol, shaking off.

This must be Estigal. Hello. The sisters are, like, talking quickly in a language you don't understand. Salon turns to you. She's like, thank you so much. Of course, of course. Yeah, absolutely. That was incredible.

Well, you know. No problem. And, hey, you know, this is what we were saying. We're trained fighters, us two. That's right. And we're saying yes. Yes, we are. Yes, to helping friends.

Would you like another drink, Red? Yes. And that's the best yes I can say all night. And would I like another drink too? Yes. Yes, I would. What about you girls? And they're like, they look at each other, these drow women.

And then they look at the two of you and they're like, yeah, all right, all right. The night's still young. Yeah, and you guys have a drink together in this disgusting bloody bar that's half broken. I feel like we get through one drink before realizing how terrible the crime scene this is. Yeah, you have to go now. Doran steals like a small keg of this stuff to take back to wherever we were. Like it's like a cask. Yeah, yeah.

Well, we'll meet you outside in a second. What, Doran? Well, I'm just saying like there's, if you look over there and Doran points, it's just big enough for us to take back to Jack's mom's house. And we could- Doran, Doran, Doran, Doran, Doran, Doran, what do we say tonight? Yes. Let's do it. Are you with me, Red?

All right. Yeah. And I put it on to Doran's back. Oh, yeah. I'll carry this. It's okay. You're fine. You're doing great.

Oh, yeah. Doing great. Oh, yeah. Okay. We'll bring it out. We'll just rest it in the alleyway. Come on. No, no.

Better if I don't put it down. I'll just carry it the rest of the way. So the women say good night to you. You're like hauling this cask awkwardly. Put it down for a second, Doran. Okay, fine. Look, it was really nice to meet you, both of you. And we wish the best of luck to you.

Is there anything we can do? Any, any. A favor we can call in to help you on your way. If anything, I owe you a favor. Really, I appreciate it. We wouldn't have been reunited tonight, and maybe not ever, if not for the two of you. So thank you for saying yes.

Well, of course. That's what we're all about, helping people. But we'll keep in mind your words of advice. Where are you off to now? I don't think we can go back to, Yarder. probably not back to Silvery Moon either. We'll be off to Waterdeep, but maybe we'll see you

again. Yeah, well, hey, we have friends in Waterdeep. Yeah, we sure do. Hey, look up a friend of ours at the Copper Cup. That's right. It's his place. Torren. Torin, that's it. Torin. It sounds like my name. We have a friend at the Copper Cup. You should check it out.

Farewell, Red and Doran. Goodbye, Saran and Islington. Of course. Farewell to you, too. And Doran, I feel like walks away, and Red's like, oh, hold on. And he skips back towards Salon and pulls her aside, just her for a moment. And he's like, hey, I'm sorry to hear about all the trouble you had with the hand and the dark tide. But you got one thing wrong. They don't just hire changelings.

Keep an eye out, just in case. Good luck. and Red turns around and skips on after Doren. Come on, let's go see if Jack wants to try some of this. All right. I'm excited, quite frankly. I'm excited to tell them that we got on a little adventure. Oh, yeah.

This is going to be great. I'm sure they had just as good a night. Oh, you know, I didn't expect to. I don't know why I didn't expect to see you, but hey, what do you guys up to? It's a small town. Right, Doren? That's right. Ha, ha, ha.

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