Dice Shame - 19 | 'Beggars Would Ride'

Episode Date: February 20, 2020

The team continues towards Waterdeep, stopping in Amphail on the way... Comedy, action and a whole lot of shaming come together in Dice Shame, an Actual Play Podcast of Storm King's Thunder by Wizards of the Coast! Join our GM Jo; her partner Harlan, his brother Alex & their best friends Justin and Rob as they tackle the daunting world of Faerun in this legendary adventure module! Dice Shame is a podcast that welcomes its audience to the gaming table. Like the games they play at home, they try not to take themselves too seriously. The show aims to be entertaining, inclusive, and irreverent, while still taking the rules (somewhat) seriously. Join us every Thursday morning for brand new episodes available on all major platforms including; Spotify, iTunes, Google Play and more! If you haven't checked it out yet... what are you waiting for?!? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The nice part about language is so long as he understood what I meant, I communicated properly. Also, does anybody have any sea urchin? That's right. No, he's parents not dead. My bad. But before you move on... You know, sometimes he can be fairly frustrating. But other times, he kills a giant. He don't feel so bad. Three massive figures Hulk out of the mist. I smell fresh dwarf.

Being home must be nice. We're actually heading back to water deep. By golly, you've got my socks all wet. Welcome back to Dice Shane, episode 19, beggars would ride. This week's MVP is Elizabeth Wilcox from Dimension Door podcast. She's been hanging out with us on Twitter. Check them out. This week, we'd also like to shout out to our friends at Tales of Asperon. Asperon is an improvisational storytelling podcast that also uses 5E, D&D.

Asperon is a world where no stars grace the skies above, and stellar rings hold the planet in its comforting embrace. It's a world of hope. Check them out at T-O-A-Podcast.com. Sounds great. Should we get into this? Yeah, let's do it. Let's do it. Welcome to episode 19, boys.

Woo! Oh, yeah. You were legally able to drink in Canada. Yeah. How was your week? Great. Yeah. I had a fantastic week.

doing? Let's check in. I'm so great. I'm so excited since last week because you left on the edge of leveling up, which is always the most satisfying thing in the end. And you've got to agonize over those choices too. Maybe there's less for the fighter or something. I don't know what your level six is, but certainly

it was like which spell do you pick? How do you decide? Oh, completely. And you know what? To be fair, it was hard for me. Because I have an ability score increase this at level six, which means I had the options to go ability or to do feats because we are playing with feats as an option.

So, Alex, tell me about Doren as a level six fighter. Well, and that being said, I did not take any feats. I did actually go to increase my strength and my constitution, which actually takes them both up a modifier level. So I went from a plus three. Oh, yeah. Strength of constitution to a plus four in both. Incredible.

Which then obviously affected my hit points. So my hit point now is a, I'm at 72. So Alex rolled his dice. Yes, I did, sorry. And your damage. My damages are higher. Yeah, and your plus-up. I don't have another, I don't have another attack.

To hit my attack bonus. Yes, yes, yes, yes. That's right. They're also increased chance. Very cool. Harlan, tell me a little bit about level six, red. Level six, on-earthed Akana Ranger is really exciting because I have greater favored enemy. And greater favored enemy gives me a plus two to my original plus two for my favorite enemy,

which means now anytime I attack human, I get plus four, and I get to add another enemy, and guess what option I can pick. Murphoke. Oh, oh, that's a great choice. Merfolk would have been a good second, but... So now I have greater favored enemy as giants, which grants me advantage to track giants

and advantage on information to giants, as well as plus four damage every time I attack a giant. That's good. Nice. Do you think it's going to come up? I don't think so. I also get a new language, which I am picking as draconic, purely because Red always knew it. He just didn't realize he didn't know it.

You just forgot you knew it. Just fake out I knew it. And I have the same level of spells and everything. But I am going to roll for my hit dice for the first time in this campaign. I think it's worth it. But I am using the very generously granted rule by our lovely GM by using this inspiration

that I was given last episode to roll 2D10 and take the higher of the two. So cross your legs. Your hit dice is a D10. Correct. And I got a nine. Nice. A nine and a what?

What was the other one? A five. Well, that sucks. Which one do you want to take? A five. A nine. Okay. All right.

So I'm going up nine hit points from my 34. So I'm at 43 hit points. Nice. I'm very happy about that. Rob, tell me about Jack as a sixth level wizard. So Jack is a sixth level wizard is going to roll for his hit points again because that's always my favorite. And I got a two, so I'm adding four hit points to go from 38 to 42. Okay.

And I get some more of that alchemical jazz, or that magical jazz as a lore master going on. So my new level six ability is called alchemical casting, and I can sort of goose my spells with spending other spell slots. So I can add an extra first level spell to add 2D2 force damage to all the damage one of my spells does. I can spend a second level slot to take the range that's already 30 feet and make it a mile. And I can spend a third level slot to upcrease the DC by 2 to take it from 15. it is now to 17. Hold on. You can take a spell range

that's 30 feet and spend a second level slot on top of it to make it a mile. Correct, yeah. Wow. That is... It's huge.

That's nuts. It's just jazz. I thought you were going to make a statement about how he used the word upcrease. Yeah, I was thinking of that too. The nice part about language is so long as you understood what I meant, I communicated properly.

Correct. I'm a big supporter of that. Yes. You're definitely right, Meda. Yeah, and I also wrote down two really interesting spells that he had. The first is Liamann's tiny hut. Never will we be sleeping, worried about the outside encroaching on us again. Cool.

It does some cool stuff. We'll come up next time we're camping. And Thunderstep, should I ever find myself cornered, Jack can explode and, like, be somewhere else. Badass. Wow. That's awesome. Yeah. And I think I'm going to break my two dice out of dice jail.

I got Roland and another unnamed die in there. And I want them back. Bust them out. Level six. Do you have to pay bail? I mean, oh, you have to make a sacrifice? They've done their time. They've done their penance. This thing is a revolving door if Chester's any sort of...

That's fair. Justin, tell me about level six, Kraloth. Kraloth is tossing and turning in his sleeve. His brow is covered in sweat. And he has taken back. He is in Borovia. The mists are surrounding him. And he looks up and he sees his three friends.

Even though they weren't there. He sees red. He sees Doran and he sees Jack. and they're all side by side, surrounded by gravestones. Kraloth tries to get up, to go to them, but he's stuck to the ground. He cannot move as he sees three massive figures hulk out of the mist towards the three of them. And each of them raises giant clubs. One is sparkling with lightning.

One is enraptured with flames. and one is sort of a misty swirl. And they go to bring them down, and Kralov holds out his hand and shouts, No! And he hears a voice that says, You could save them. Follow my will.

And I will give you what you need to protect them. And as these three different elemental clubs come smashing down on the friends, through an extension of his will, Kralov is able to have some sort of barrier appear before the three of them that takes the form of a sight and blocks the blow. For this level up, Kralath receives Sentinel at Death's Door. It's a reaction, 30 feet.

Whenever myself or an ally is the target of a critical hit, I can convert that hit to normal, and I can do that three times per long rest. That's pretty good. That's wicked. That's amazing. Very good choice, especially as a cleric.

Oh, well, that's actually just a domain feature. Oh, so I just get that. Oh, that's amazing. Cool.

So I get 10 more hit points. I'm at 63 hit points now. Nice. Beefy. 63. And what are you? 72. He's a fighter, man.

That's good. But wasn't he like 55 last time? He took an increase to his con. That's what I'm saying. It's such a great. Yeah. What are you at now? 43.

And you're 42. 42. Wow. Red. You have a dream tonight. sunlight catches a fine mist of salt water as it hovers over the craggy purple rocks barnacles threaded with algae clings stubbornly against the waves here and there interspersed with glistening crabs sifting material through their claws and into their bubbling mandibles this coast is a shattered jewel crowned by scrubby trees with vast leagues of salt water on all sides the sky is perlessent through the scrubland on the island on the island Island, three dozen humans walk an eroded path down to the sea.

Their skin is a burnished bronze. Their clothes whip and snap in the wind. It is a procession. At the trail's end, on a low cliff facing where the sun rises ominous, the humans gather. The sound of the ocean battering the island is deafening. Everything is crusted with salt, glittering and sharp. Three people step forward. Two men and a woman, each holding a child.

One baby is squalling. One is silent. The third is not a baby. A girl, maybe four years old. Her small face is pale and drawn. The humans take turns throwing their babies into the ocean. The waves swallow them. As the procession leaves the shore,

the morning sun glances at a man walking the meandering path back up to the land. His neck is ringed on both sides with ridges, raised and slitted, and gasping faintly against the morning air. And red sits up next to like the gray blue breaking dawn. You all right? You look over in Dorence in there cleaning his teeth with a frayed piece of wood. Oh, yeah. No, I'm all right. I just had a bit of a dream.

Caught me off God a little bit, to be honest. How are you doing, Doris? Don't say. You look like you're having a dream there. You're kicking your legs. Was it, I say anything? No, you didn't. I don't really know what came over me.

I'm sure it was nothing. Do you want to talk about it? No, no, not right now. Let it sit on me, and maybe in a little bit. The dream is starting to fall through your mind, like sand through your fingers. most of it leaving you, just impressions. So good morning, everyone, yeah. Welcome.

Good morning. Good morning. Do you go back to bed after that, or are you up? No, I'm up. Yeah, I think we don our armor and have some breakfast. Maybe, maybe, Red, you scale a tree and you grab some eggs. Oh, I don't know a bird test. It's like a bird eggs.

I love that. Come back down, crack them over the fire. Yeah. So cool. Got like a little cast iron skillet and we're just like, you know. For some reason, I think Crails. Loth is like a really good cook. I can picture that too.

Yeah, I see that. You know, give me more of this and that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Big Papa's cooking. Yeah. I'll get your bellies full. Oh, you're gonna love it. He makes the best eggs.

Mm, scrambled eggs. The trick is, is to use a spatula. Also, does anybody have any sea urchins? You're like breaking up people's field rations and, like, adding it, rehydrating it with some of your life. A little sprinkles of, like, mushroom in the woods. Yeah, red, you're finding herbs and stuff. Yeah, I need the one that smells like.

I know. exactly which one. Okay. And I run and get it and come back with like the right mushroom. Maybe at some point you'll let me cook for you all.

And then like you all kind of look up and then in the back of your minds you're thinking like burning gob and flesh over the fire. Everyone is sharing a thought bubble. Nah, nah, we all have the exact same thought. Like it's all like the bubbles.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think Jack's sitting kind of quiet. You know, he said his morning prayers to La Thander and now he's sort of considering Doran who's,

you know, like, hey, maybe I should cook. Dorn, so you were on your way back to the Great Peak Mountains? before we met you? I wasn't really on my way there or back. I had sort of arrived.

I was thinking of selling some wares. That's why I was there, but I never really started. And then, you know, and that's sort of when we crossed paths. Yeah, is there anybody back there who would miss you or you were gone on a big journey? You just felt adrift? Well, I'm the youngest child in my extended family, and most of my family is past now. Most of my friends are past. There's nothing really drawing me there anymore.

or many of my friends died in the wars. And others you see once every 50 years and... That's right. Closest you get. And then we have our fistfights and then we, you know, say goodbye and wait another 50 years or so. Why'd you ask? Just thinking about it. Sounds a little lonely.

Well, a dwarf is never really lonely when he's got, you know, friends. Alcohol. God? Blood beard. That's right. It's a popular saying. All of those. And I'm certainly a lot less lonely these days when I'm surrounded by folks that I,

know and care about. I love you, too. I feel the exact same way. Can I roll insight on my dream just to see if I can decipher whether it was, you know, an average dream that felt real or maybe something a bit more supernatural? Okay. Like, is it lingering with me in a strong way? Ten.

The island that you dreamed of is not one you've ever visited. And was there anything that particularly felt more tangible than this dream than compared to any other dream I've had? The scent of the sea seems to linger. on your fur red. As you go to feed yourself something from breakfast, you catch a whiff of it, some seaweed smell. Oh. And red sort of like looks taken aback for a moment, which is so different than him normally in breakfast. And this is right after him, like, being so excited about this. I think maybe something might have stirred me last night in a stronger way

than I expected. Last night, I had a dream. It's quite an interesting dream. A little more tangible than I've had before. It's a number of people, about three dozen walking along a sandy shore of an island that I've never been to before. Each of them sort of looked morose as if they were part of a processional. Three of them entered the water, each carrying a child, one sort of baby, another one the same, but the third was an older childish, a pale face drawn on. It's all hazy now, but I dismissed it as a dream originally, but I'm a bit shaken. I'm now taking a bite on my food and I can, I can swear I smell the sea salt on my hand. And I hold it out for, like, anyone else to, like, verify the smell.

Crayloff, can you smell this? I mean, it might just be some of the salt from the food that we cooked. I don't smell anything personally. Fair enough. I grab your hand. I'm not really sure. And I lick your paw. It tastes like an animal's paw.

It doesn't taste salty at all? No. You ever had a dream like that before? No, not that I remember. Mind you, it's a lot I don't remember. Do I recognize that ritual sacrifice as being from any island cultures or anything I know? What a history check, Jack? 19.

This does not ring any bells about any current cultures. It seems like it could have been something that people did long ago. Either way, I'm not too worried about it. I'm sure it's nothing important. Before you move on, did you see any animals, any creatures, what color was the sea? Like, Jack wants to get every possible geographic sort of detail down. Where was the sun? What time of day was it?

To just try and narrow down where on a map that could have happened. Don't worry about it. And, like, red sort of brushes it off. He's like, it's not that important. Dreams tend to, you forget them. If you don't write down and talk about the details, we might never know. That's all right. It was just a dream.

I have dreams all the time. I don't know if you do as well, Doran or Jack, from my God, that are passed down directly to me. And when I wake up, I am able to more direct. connect with my god it's happened five times already on this adventure it would be okay to be afraid no i'm not i'm just don't remember much of it if it happens again i'll make a note what i'm saying red is that it might be more significant than you're giving credit to maybe and red sort of like stands up and starts getting dressed like much else in your life you sort of brush it off yeah i think that's unfortunately just the way red handles this stuff i don't think i think he's like yeah

that was a cool dream, but like, and it's interesting, and this might be a point of contention between Jack and him, and I'm kind of playing into that, because I think Red would frustratingly be like, eh, and Jack might be like, no, I need to know this. Oh, no, what color was the sky? Yeah, exactly. Searches for knowledge everywhere. Exactly. I think that's kind of just how Red is about this stuff, and he stands up and he starts

dawning his armor, and he's like, anyway, the day's not going to get any shorter, and we still want to get a time fail before nightfall, right? I agree. Did you want a piggyback? Yes. Okay, all right, come on. And as you're chatting, you turn around and Doran's already got his pack on, and he's already snuffed the fire out.

And it's just like, well, let's go. Grey Hooded Sparrow, the elder from your... Did he ever have dreams? Nope. Come on, Trayloff. And I, like, point the direction of our coming. And I kind of fall back with Jack as, as Kraloth and Red take the lead. I look at Jack and I say, you know, sometimes he can be fairly frustrating.

But other times he kills a giant You don't feel so bad The duality of And I put a hand on your back Come on, let's make some footprints You head off into the scrubland It's another full day of travel for you Are you keeping the same marching order as before?

Yeah Hey, yeah dude Can you pull out that magical map That you'd make sometimes? Sure, Jack brings up a map It starts out big as the realms and sort of the whole round and sort of zooms in and zooms in until we've just got Amphel

sort of showing in this dotted line the path we've traveled starting at where we'd met and sort of the whole path where the dotted line where the giant took us just everything we... And like where we are. Yeah, where we are and where we're going and... Oh, this is so incredible. Forget cartography. I have to learn magic.

I mean, why not? So you see that Amphel is on the eastern border of the Sword Mountains, which lies between it and the sword coast, the sea. Wow. And over here, this is the sword mountains. There have been many a dwarven kingdom risen and fallen here. It's riddled with caves and dungeons. As you travel through the day, you crest a hill and see about a dozen humanoid figures. They are roaming the landscape

and they enter a small thicket of trees as you crest the hill. You're about a mile off. Um, a dozen, you said? Yeah. And can I decipher anything about them? Or how far away are they? A mile. A mile away. Yeah, they are running and they enter a thicket.

Either way, I think I'd signal to the others to just let them know what's going on. Can I do the perception check? Sure. Ooh, 10. You don't notice anything out of the ordinary, apart from the fact that these figures enter this thicket of wood. I mean, with a mile, I'm not too worried. I wait till everyone to catch up and I tell them, like, is it? A couple of humans over there, entering to a thicket.

What's the group consensus? Well, it's sort of in our path anyways. Do you want to just sort of head in that direction and see if there's... They might need help. Why don't we just send Kieran a little bit ahead because she's so much faster than us and we can continue walking and illegally pace, just in case we're walking into something very dangerous? Yeah, I might ask Kieran to fly ahead, sort of get a good bird's eye view. And once they've been over the area and maybe done a circle once or twice and had a good look at it,

and I sort of see them flying ahead of us. I'll summon them back so they can tell us what they've seen. And do the four of you want to continue traveling forward while Kieran does their scout? Or would you like to stay? A slow pace. It's a mile would take a while. Yeah. Slow the pace down, yeah. It's quite a distance away from you.

I don't think we would close within 300 feet. No, sure. So you get maybe about a third of the way there before Jack, you've seen that Kieran has made their way to the thicket of wood. Perfect. If they don't see anything interesting from above, they might go down and investigate. sniff around and I'll give them a minute or two to do that before I call them back. Sure.

Yeah. When they pop back into existence beside you, they have wide eyes and their fur is all standing on end. What did you see? There's a number of barbarians, boss. There's wolves, too. They're hunting. I was frightened.

I wouldn't go over there. How many did you see? I counted 13 and four wolves. They're tracking. deer, I saw them catch one. They ripped it apart. Did they have any symbols, any totem animals with them? The wolf.

Drawn on their clothing. Yes. Let's swing wide north and get away from them. As we swing away from this group of creatures, we hear the sounds of wolves howling from within the thicket. Is there any way, with my primeval awareness, the howl can be distinguished as what kind of, you know, is it like a, I smell meat in the air, like,

I smell fresh dwarf. You perceive these wolf howls to be celebratory? All right. I communicate that to everyone else. It's like the wolves are celebrating, so let's continue moving north. What sort of check would it be just to get a little bit of context of what sort of barbarians those are and what their deal might be? These are Uthgart barbarians.

They are probably the gray wolf tribe. They are a little bit farther south from their territory than you would expect them to be. What's the reputation of the gray wolf tribe? Bad. It's very strange. They've come this far south. They're usually much further north. There's other tribes that are generally in this area.

If this is humanity versus the giants right now, we've got to look after one another, but they might not feel the same way. And I mean, I'm feeling good right now, but I still don't know if it would be worth it to risk. Oh, I'm not interested in talking to them. Don't get me wrong. No.

I just think it's very interesting. It's about 5 p.m. when you make it to Amphel. The closer you get to the town, the more groomed the fields are. There's a lot of ranches. You notice herds of horses, especially, being kept here as livestock. Ah, there's the town. Just about time for a drink, a bite, and a nap.

Mm-hmm. I can hear your tumbling from here. Who's Beos' friend we're looking for? Alios Stonehenge. Amphail lies north of Waterdeep on the long road. It's on top of a hill, and you enter the town square. there is a black stone statue of a stallion. It's been vandalized.

It's painted in different colors, yellow and blue. And there are a number of bird droppings all along the top of it. Within spitting distance of the statue, there is a tavern. It has a wooden sign hanging off of the front door that has a image of a tankard of ale with two horns on either side. Just to get an understanding of this town, is it surrounded by a wall, is it just sort of out of crossroads? What are we actually walking into? It's surrounded on all sides by these ranches, and it's a smallish city. There's probably three or four hundred buildings here all clustered together on the top of the hill. I take it that since we've walked right into the center of town, there's no gate. There's no gate. There's no wall. There's no wall. Right. I turn to Jack. I probably should have asked this before we arrived here, but growing up in Waterdeep,

what should we be expecting from this town? Lots of ranchers, lots of farmers. It's another town on the long road, so it sees its fair number of travelers. It's sort of the gateway to some of those stuff further north. Also, rich Water Davians maintain, like, private villas here where they raise, like, show horses. Lots of the rich folk in Waterdeep tend to vacation out here have little villas and ranches that are a bit for show. You know how rich people

loves quaint small towns and then they go there and they make them like snooty? It's like that. Doran is staying in there are kind of perplexed. He's looking at the statue and he says,

it's a little bit confusing that you've got this rich area and this is obviously been vandalized and he's pointing at the statue of the stallion. Yeah, I don't understand

it looks like it's painted yellow and blue. So it's been gilded also by a prankster you would presume. Is the statue? more than a hundred years old? Yeah. And it's art, apparently. Jack, what do you say?

It's a statue, for sure. The Waterdeep's been around for a long time, and people wanting to get away from Waterdeep has been around for a long time. Like, this statue is a really significant landmark here. Yeah, you would know that this is the Great Chalarn. It's the Great Chalarn. It's a famous war stallion bred in Amphel.

One of the most famous war stallions. Sounds awesome. You don't say. The dwarven folk tend to stay away from animals, so it's quite interesting. It's like worn on its. back in a way you know when people always touch a statue that it gets kind of like worn down it looks like the saddle is sat on by people very often red's already on top of it like sitting it's so a little kid comes up and he's holding a rock and he's like mister didn't you know we're allowed

to throw rocks at the birds to keep the poop off of it oh i'm not a bird but i'll get off do you want to throw rocks with me no never all right hey kid who vandalizes um not me i'm a roll insight? Nope. Definitely not him. Hey, kid. Yeah? Who's in charge around here?

Oh, I am. Oh, sir. We're so sorry. I didn't mean to be on top of this horse. That's okay. You're so young to be in charge. Well, I'm the firstest, youngest mayor. Jack, is this the youngest male you've ever seen?

And I kind of put my hand around Red's waist and I say, because I can't really reach your shoulder. Let's just go this way. Come on. Bye, Mr. Mayor. He's not the mayor. Goodbye. We find it later he is the mayor.

Yeah. Could you imagine? And yeah, we enter the tavern. The Staghorn Flaggin. It's like your standard, cozy tavern. There's like two dozen tables altogether. It's a single-story affair. There's three people serving tables and whatnot.

And there's a gray-haired, middle-aged woman who is pouring some tankards of beer from a cask. Hello. Uh, hello. Oh, can I get you something? Sure. I think four flagons of your best ale, please. And a nice booth in the corner. That'll be a silver piece. Of course, and I reach in my pocket and pull out a silver piece.

You guys let yourselves into the corner booth. She walks over with the four tankards of ale and sets them down in front of you. Are you looking for a room tonight? Actually, we're looking for Alios, Stonehenge. Aliosah? Yes, sorry. That's me. Pleasure to meet you.

Well, hello. My name is Redd, and this is my friend Doran. Howdy? My friend Trayloth. Hello, hello. I'm Jack. So nice to meet you. Does my reputation precede me?

A little bit, actually. We just came from a town called Goldenfields. Let me guess. Miro Selprin. Quiet. Oh, how is he? The big furball. This one knows him better, and I pat Doren on the shoulder.

He's certainly a funny character. And he helped us there. And I'm looking around on my companions, not sure of how much to say out loud. It's been a rough day over in Goldenfields. They had a second giant attack two days ago. Oh, my goodness. I'm so sorry to hear that.

And he's all right, right? Yes, yes, yes. Yes, after losing his left hand. Just kidding, of course. Okay. We don't, well, he did just lose his parents. That's actually why we were in Goldenfield. Oh, that's right.

No, his parents are dead, my bad. To tell him about the horrible. thing that happened to his parents in Nightstone when that place was attacked by giants. We did save Relix, his family pet, and delivered it safely. So, your adventures. That's right. And we did slay the giants in Goldenfield. Yeah, we're a pretty big deal.

A lot of places being attacked by giants lately. You haven't seen anything giant related lately, have you? She pulls a stool over to the table to sit with you, and she gestures for one of her weight staff to bring her a cup of wine. She takes a load off a little bit. Well, so tell me, beyond the giants and whatnot, how's, how's adventuring life treat you? I must admit I kind of miss it. I used to be adventurer as well. Of course. And more than that, I've captivated the hearts of a few adventurers in my time. You're captivating mine right now. Oh, I thank you.

You know, adventuring. It certainly is fun in its own right. It's also a lot of work. Just to take you back. Do any of you have loved ones that you're leaving behind to go on your... adventures? No. No? No? Fine looking to Baxie like yourself? No, my love is all here. My love is here as well. And I take off my amulet and I hand it to her. Oh. I am a follower of Calimvor. Yes. One of my traveling companions was also devoted to Kelimvor. Oh, you don't say. Yes, kind of a serious man. Bringing about the balance can be a serious business, but in my style, doesn't have to be. I suppose. She hands you the amulet back. Oh, yes. Thank you. And yourself, Master Dwarf, do you have a loved one at home?

Well, uh, I was married, but it didn't really work out. I'm sorry to hear that. Yeah, we're just different people. That's fair. That's okay, though. Thank you for asking. And no, I've got my friends here. And this seems to be a very new thing for me, but I'm quite liking it.

Because when I'm done here, I'll be going back home, back to my simple life of boring. Ah, Smithwork. To the simple life, she proposes a text. To the simple life. Being home must be nice. We're actually heading back to Waterdeep. I grew up there. I've got some friends and family, and it'll be nice to be home for a little bit.

That's your home. Yeah. And are you leaving behind any loved ones to go adventuring, Mr. Halfel? I mean, it's sadly been the truth of it. You know, you have a life. Before, you know, this week I was more of an archaeologist than an adventurer proper, but there's certainly a lot of travel involved with that. You leave people you care about behind.

Of course. I had a few adventurer admires in my day. One of them gave me this. She pulls a ring out of a pocket on her apron. I've been carrying it around for so many years. It's kind of silly, honestly. He's long dead, but... But who's long dead?

Someone who was infatuated with me gave me this trinket and said I might like it. It doesn't turn you invisible, does it? Oh, no. Oh, good. Between you and me, I don't need any help with altering my appearance. As she's staring at the four of you, the color of her face changes from pale peach to red to purple to black, back to peach again. And she says, and that's how I know Miro's from the carnival. Wonderful.

Oh, yes. Anyway, she puts the ring on her thumb and flicks it at you, Doran. I catch it in midair. Do I know what the ring is? You do not. You can tell by touching it that it's magical. No, it is a wooden ring. Wow.

Well, what does it do? Well, it will grant a special favor but once. If you whisper the name of the romantic partner that I used to have to the ring, he will appear and point the way. Interesting. So the ring that you hold in your hand is wooden. It's carved. There are nymphs dancing around the perimeter of it.

And she says, his name is Keltar Dardrigan. I love that the magic ring where all you have to do is say a name is given to the one person who's, like, continually fucking up names. It's going to be like Ash and Evil Dead, where he's like, Clatu, Marata, he was a man who liked oddities, and from what I understand, before he gave it to me, he thought that I might like it to pursue my own adventures. So, you're telling me that this will grant me a wish? No.

No, it's just going to point the way. It's kind of like, Kellenvora has. this ability that he can channel through me that allows me to see a direction. Kind of like, it's called clairvoyance, as well. Ah, yes. I've taken to call it. And it'll point you in a direction that might be of use to you. At least, that's what I'm picking up.

Very much like that. I hope that it serves you. Tell me his name again. Keltar Dardrigan. I am making a mental note. And a physical one. And a physical one. Scratching it into his shoes.

He's got his little... The back of his shield. No, he's writing in his little leather-bound book. And he's Kel-Tar-Dar-Turkin. Is this an inn as well? Can we stay here? You certainly can. Well, why don't we take a little recuperation break?

Maybe a few drinks, a few lolly gags, and then we'll hit the road in the morning. Perhaps we could get ourselves a beast of bird in here. We sell the most fantastic horses in all of Fayrune. And I imagine, with supply and demand, it's inexpensive to buy a horse here. Um, we sell our riding horses for 100 gold pieces. Oh.

Each. They are of the finest thoroughbred quality. Hmm. You know what? We will buy horses. You don't happen to sell them, do you? I do not, but I do know people who will. Well, why don't you get us in touch with the best horse provider you can?

And I know you being a friend of us now would put us in line with the person who can offer us the best stallions. Not to put a damper on the conversation. and I do definitely enjoy the spirit. You are a man of Kelmvore. Well, just trying to balance the good things with the not-so-good things. Humanity is under siege. Pardon me. There have been several giant attacks all around Fayrune.

I am thankful to Kalimvor that there has not been an attack here, but I believe that it is only a matter of time before something, whether it's a giant or whether it is. some roving band of bandits who are taking advantage of the situation set their targets on Amphail. There was a tribe of Uthgard, Wolf Barbarians, like within a day's rider here hunting. I don't know what's brought them so far south, but it's... All I mean to say is that if you have a militia, if you have a force that can be rallied to protect the town, it would be better that they know that there is a threat than if they didn't.

I thank you for that. That's all the damper I'm going to put on this part. So about those horses Yes, yes I'm not really looking forward to this Even though I brought it up Are you afraid of horses? Deathly

Master Dwarf No You seem like such a stalwart adventurer I figured with all the blood in your beard That you're someone who doesn't shy away from He washed his beard I can smell it from here I don't know what it is

You can put me up against A goblin or a ghoul Or a bandit any day And he won't make me quiver, but put me on a horse. By golly, you've got my socks all wet. Oh, Doran. That with what?

It might not be a, it might be a thing of height. We could find you a nice pony. Now, hey, actually, Kralov hit it on the head. It is the height and a pony. Why, that sounds pretty good to me. And sturdy, just like yourself. Oh, let's do it. Duran is obviously excited and giddy now.

Well, this has been great. I think getting horses is a great idea. And you're sure you want a pony. want to share. Oh, absolutely. All right. In which case, then I think we should get some ponies, get some rest, and hit the road early morning. Cool. Yeah. With the horses, we can get there in a date. Montage? Yeah, a montage. You guys are in the stables. There's a man in overalls. There's a man in overalls, and he's wearing riding chaps. And we're getting our horses for the ride to water deep. We see the four of you in the stables. You're sizing up some horses.

what do the horses look like that you choose for yourselves? I pick a pony. Aw, tell me about the... I pick a pony. That is brown with a white, creamy white mane. Oh, so cute. It's like a light brown. Is it a girl or a boy pony?

I actually didn't think to look that far. You got to look at their junk. It's a male. What do you call him? You pony You pony Yippany Is it

Dyer rat sized Yes Exactly the size of a dire rat Shetland pony sized Dyer rats That's a reference to episode Five Red, the horse that you're interested in

I'm gonna go with a pure black stallion Just like my boy Kralov Yeah well Kralov's going with pure white No way Yep A mare or a stallion Oh a mare And what are their names?

My Stalin is named Asta. Ooh. A-S-T-A. Jack, tell me about your horse. Jack picks out a chestnut mare and just immediately connects with her eyes and names her Emakir, which is gem flower in the elven language. Wow. You can just tell the differences.

Hey, you pony and Emma Kier. And Red, you can talk to your horse. Yes, I can. In fact, I can talk to everyone's horse. I can see which ones are, like, happy to be here and which ones are pissed off. In fact, maybe that comes in helpful. Krayloth is, like, struggling to name his horse, and I walk over and I ask the horse what her name is. Oh, yeah.

My name is Glynn. Her name is Glyn. That is a beautiful name, and it fits you perfectly. Well, if your horse told you her name, well, why don't you ask what my pony's name is, then? Shit fart. All right, shit fart. Let's go. And I, like, struggle to get on to shit fart.

It's like an old-ass pony. And he's like, it's shit fart. Stupid fucking dwarf. As it says shit fart, it raises its tail and... It's, like, really happy about its name. It's beautiful. This gorgeous pony. It's got brown, it's brown with a creamy white mane and a creamy white...

Shit fart. And shitty tail. Like, like, like pattern right over its, like, tail underneath it. of like brown on the white. Children. So the four of you stable your horses, Glynn, Asta,

amakir, and shit fart. And you retire in the inn for the evening. Horses, horses, horses. Now we're riding in style. Thank you so much for joining and please consider supporting us on Patreon.

It makes this program and many other things we do very possible. See you next time.