Dice Shame - 2-173 | 'Dead Wrong'

Episode Date: December 18, 2025

A horrific creature chases down the party with murderous intent..._______________________________________________________________________________________________________________Imagine your best game of D&D. The shocks, the twists and turns, the moments that can’t be caught because you just had to be there. That’s Dice Shame.Join our DM Jo, her husband Harlan, their brother Alex & their friends Nic & Timm as they experience those unmissable, gut-wrenching, heart-aching, joy-filled moments.This legendary AP releases a brand new episode every Thursday morning at 1:20 am!Content Warning: animal death, swearing, violence, claustrophobia Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Wimmy, get in this fight. Do you got a roll for it, yeah. Fuck her! Plant one in his head. Ten? Get away from my friends. Run to us. He's like, oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, she's not here.

There is another item. And we're in a fight. That's what I'd be asked. Dinner for later. Back to back. Head to the tower. Well, at least get close. Anybody got guiding bolt?

I love this kind of, like, crunchy pedantic. Crunchy potato. Yeah. Natural 20. Oh, no. Killer. Dang it. Yeah.

But it's just, dang it. Welcome back to Dice Shame. This is Season 2, Episode 173, Dead Wrong. MVP this week is Scotty, who is an avid listener, good fan and great friend. Scotty is an avid listener and attends all of the Dyshame re-listens that we do every Sunday on our Discord. They're always the first to comment in the new channels, and their comments are always wonderful to read. Thank you, Scotty. You're this week's MVP. All right, should we play some D&D? Yeah, let's do it.

Woo-hoo! Finding yourselves at the Tower Stronghold that General Chaos Hammer had used as his basive operations, you'd encountered a scene of some terrible violence. And now with a creature advancing on Temeel and the rest of the party, let's roll for initiative.

Tim, what'd you get for Widdid's initiative? Unfortunately, even with advantage from the helm of alertness, I am still only getting an eight in all. Okay. Get the dirty rolls out now. Harlan, would you get for red? I rolled a natural one.

Oh! That's not good? Nope. We don't want that. Nope. An auspicious beginning. But very thematic. Red is obviously distracted and still coming down from his frantic memory.

Nick, what did Tamil get? A 14. Doran. That's going to be a 22. Ooh. Doran, it's your turn. Doran is going to see Timil appear. Yeah.

Running from this dwarf. and I'm going to yell back to Red using my commander's strike and I'm going to say, Red, that ain't Chaos Hammer. Plant one in his head. All right, buddy. And Red pulls his arrow and he fires

at the dwarf running. It's going to be a plus nine for your... It's going to be a 23 to hit. You do hit. Yeah, 27 damage. The arrow deals a heavy blow to this creature's body, but it doesn't seem to slow

it down as it basically runs down to Meal. It's not slowing down. Does it look like blood's coming out? Is it like... A spurt of dark liquid emerges from the arrow wound and slicks

the ground behind it as it charges her. It ain't blood. It ain't human. That's not chaos hammer. 26 to hit. I will silver-rebarbs that. Okay. It just means.

means that you have to re-roll. You have disadvantage, basically, on the attack. Fabulous. Let's find out. 16. Oh. Misses. Nice. Let's go. Worth it. Good call.

The creature's mouth expands to a disgusting size, and it tries to bite you. It's almost like it's a full knee-jerk reaction, that same lightning force that power static just kind of bursts forth from her center mass and there's just this kind of like flash of bright light that maybe even just kind of like lights up the night in this burst of light to meal you catch the expression on this thing's face as it tries to bite you and you know in the depths of your understanding that its eyes are Empty and soulless. Oh.

Okay. Mm-hmm. It is now your turn. Looking up, this thing illuminated. It's over her. Maybe she's stumbled back a little bit, so it's kind of underlit. It could not be more horrifying. And Tamele just mutters under her breath.

Well, fuck this. And she'll cast a mention door and land herself right next to her compatriots. Oh. Fabulous. I was hoping you were going to do that. Oh. Uh, right. so um that's not chaos hammer hello hello uh it doesn't seem to have eyes or a soul i don't know what that is

you didn't leave us of course i didn't leave you and dorin gives you a big hug i timil you realize now that you are within safety's reach that even though you were not bit by this creature it has snipped off a piece of your braid and it like bit some of your hair off she she's like talking I don't know what that thing. She noticed the brain. Motherfucker! All right. Fine.

That's how you want to play it. And now she's, um, she's like, more mad than scared. It's not human. It's bleeding black, eicker of some sort. Look, this thing is strong. We have to be smart. But if it's... It's a soulless thing.

It's not... I thought you could only detect living humanoid things. Well, then clearly there's a humanoid in that tower. All right. Then let's get rid of it. of this thing and find that one. Is that the end of your turn, Temeel? Yeah, that's the end of my turn.

Witted, you're up. Seeing that Tamele has teleported back to us, I feel like you see everyone, like, as Tamele teleports in, like, positioned in like a perfect, like, adventuring album cover, like, set up as we're embracing against this incoming monster. It's missing Witted,

who then appears in the sky right above everyone descending down as he's materialized. he's already pulled a stone off the ground. He's got some device that's held and attached to his armor by two hands, and it is some sort of gravity gun device that is causing a big rock to fly up, very much just the Half-Life II gravity gun, where it's just hovering there, sort of just swirling around quicker and quicker and quicker and quicker. And as the invisibility fully deer materializes,

there's just as kud-dunk as it then fires. This is the spell catapult, but I'm casting it at level two. I'm going to fire this rock for 48 damage unless he passes a dexterity saving throw. All right. Did you say 4D8 or 48? 4D8. Okay, still cool. There you go.

Still got a roll for it, yeah. Natural 20. Oh, no. Killer. Dang it. But it's just, dang it. This big, like, I yanked a stone out of the yard and, like, this huge, like, good, like, brick for a tower.

A dwarven brick goes hurtling through the air. Whistles right over the sky's shoulder, unfortunately. The old yanking heat. It smashes into, like, a far side of the stone wall and, like, takes out a big chunk of masonry, like, unimportant masonry. That is an important detail of the spell. Something took 4D8-10.

Hamage, but luckily The humanoid life signs just disappear. Yeah, yeah, you're like, oh no, my fucking, what is it? I'll hide in this little closet. No one will go. So the deck save is like jumping out of the way. It doesn't take half damage? There's no half damage for catapult, unfortunately it is all or nothing yet.

I like that. You gain some intel, though, through this attack. It's not a physical dodge. this creature seems to like melt sideways into some shadows and then melts back into reality. It's like a phase shifter? Fuck this there. And I just end my turn by hitting the ground

and I'm in the midst of everyone in the armor but in the armor's voice go get away from my friends. Red, it's your turn. Red panicked. Fear still on his face. He snaps his head to the creature and sees it barrel. barreling down, dodging, witted, rock like it was nothing, like some sort of amorphous creature,

and backlit by the moon over this massive field as he runs towards us. Red is stricken by fear. And then he hears like a chuckle to his left, and he turns and he sees Temeel. Her eyes locked on the man approaching, she readies static. And almost with a bizarre expression, he turns to his right and he sees Witted, saying, stay away from my friends the confidence in his voice and he sees Doran beside him pulling out his axe with a grim on his face and suddenly like being brought back to earth red sort of just feels this almost like a shiver wash over him and his fear just dissipates at the top of his head and he just sorry I I forgot where I was and who I was with he sort of says the nod and then

kneels down and takes two arrows out and plants them in the grass next to him and he says all right this fuck is going down and he pulls out one of the arrows and he nails him in the forehead with a 22 yes you hit and that'll be 20 damage okay and red will pull another arrow you're fucked with the wrong crew 14 a hit no that misses damn the arrow goes wide and sinks into the wooden door of the tower, 200 feet away. Wimmy, get in this fight! And Red stands up, and it's a bonus action. We'll put his hands on his friend's shoulders.

Cool. She'll join next round. Speaking of, top of the round, Doran Iron Fest. Doran's going to run his full 35 feet towards this dwarfly character. and he's going to use his action to call on his companions to fire a commander strike and he's going to yell back red that's not chaos hammer take a shot on it buddy and I'm going to suggest you just do it normal he's not humanoid correct that's right it's going to be 23 to hit 23 hits has he been damaged he has I'm going to use colossus slayer

Ooh, yes. Extra D-A. Doren, how much am I adding to this? Ten. Ten. Wow. Oh, max on my 10. Nicely done.

Doren, can I just say that Commander Strike ability is one of the coolest things, even especially narratively. I just love, especially for a Dwarven fighter where it's like the enthusiastic, like, I know, right? Like, I'm just a fan. I forgot that even exists in fifth edition. It's so cool. Thanks, dude.

That would be. 31 damage. Oof. Got him, buddy. Wow, that's a hefty hit. Red loses the arrow as it flies past Doran's braid and causes it to move slightly and pegs the creature right in the forehead. Yeah, you give Doran shivers. Yeah, you strike it mightily with the arrow.

A mighty hit. Nice. A palpable hit. Okay, so then with my other attack, I'll just whip out my crossbow off my back. I'll swing it around. Hell yeah. And that's going to be a kind of a pitiful. That's a 1D8 plus two.

That's a 9 to hit. Nine does not hit. So yeah, Doran kind of fumbles with the opportunity. He sees red shoot such a nice shot. He thinks, I might as well try that since I'm so far away. And he just puts the bow back on his back. Oh, good. Hey, don't worry, buddy.

We all have moments like that. He shoots the ground right next to his foot. He's like, oh, no, I'm not going to do that. Next turn. Fabulous. It's this creature's turn. Oh, no. Go on this creature.

Go off. Go off. Get close. Run to us. Yeah, the creature after being struck mightily by one of Red's arrows sort of almost spins off balance with the force of the projectile and then continues spinning sideways and vanishes. Uh-oh.

Um, something tells me that wasn't, uh, that wasn't an accident. Does anybody got guiding bolt? Could Widdid make an archa check just to confirm what that might have looked like in terms of did they disappear? or teleport or something like that. Witted, you can definitely make an Arcana check. 15 isn't my best role on Arcana. It seemed like, it didn't seem like a mundane teleportation,

as mundane as teleportation is. If you're familiar with a hag, the way that it uses ethereal jaunt to, like, change its place, It's not exactly teleporting. And it's not exactly like a hag either, but it's something flavored like that. It's, I believe, doing some kind of potentially phasing, dimensional shifting about really sure what it's doing here exactly. And it's like, I feel like in Witted's helmet, it's been like the helm of awareness like is zooming in on it. And the more he saw like its wounds acting in strange ways, there's just like question marks appearing on the sensors.

like does not you don't understand what are we looking at exactly here and it's like trying to like locate the area where the creature was and it's just got question marks popping up it's like the swinging chain when they zoom in on the goat in Jurassic Park yes yeah exactly exactly it's like what's going on here no we've seen something like that before i think hey don't yeah Tamil it's your turn Cool Set you up nice Does anybody have anything that can see

Invisibility I mean how high of like a perception check Would we need to be able to even locate where this thing is Could I do some sort of insight check to see Whether or not this feels like the kind of thing That might have like a frightening presence Or might have some sort of like Ability to

To discombobular us with with like fear or some kind of like charming effect yeah you can roll a perception or a nature check oh okay oh it's just a 16 when you were out close and personal with it you didn't really get that impression it didn't impose any kind of negative feelings upon you like magically apart from the ones that your character innately maybe had big scary to work yeah but the way that it its mouth changed shape to try to bite you was definitely a scary experience in and of itself. Well, then, I think that without an actual target and without kind of knowing what's going to happen next, I think that what I will do is I will use my gift of spite.

Ooh, Timil, it's good to see you by my side here. Well, I couldn't let you fight all by yourself and take all the glory. Well. So basically, what I'm going to do is I'm going to give Doran. this gift. I'm going to come up and as a bonus action, I will give him the help action. So for your next thing, that you can make in your next attack with advantage. Also, until the start of my next turn, the first time the creature you help, Doran in this case, hits a target with an attack, that target has disadvantage on the next attack roll it makes within the next minute.

So that's my bonus action, help action for Doran. And then I'm just going to ready an action with static. If I see the creature come out within 30 feet of me, then I will throw static at him. And that's my ready to action. And that's pretty much all I can do at this moment. You know, that's not going to happen. We work as a team here, and I've been, I've been, you've been just as effective as I have. I appreciate that, Doran. We can count our wins and norses once we've taken care of whatever this fucking thing is. Yeah, it's a scary-looking motherfucker.

Witted, it's your turn. Kill it, Witted. Okay, I am going to try to see if I can figure out if this will work. If I fly 25 feet forward, my full speed, where I saw the creature disappear is with it, like, if I have a spell that does 120 feet and hits a whole 30-foot area, I'm going to try to roughly, if it's moved, like, more than 30 feet away from where it was, this isn't going to catch it at all. In fact, if it's moved 30 feet away from where it was, this spell is not going to catch it. This spell hits a 30-foot cube, so it's going out 50 feet in every direction, basically. Okay, yeah. So from where the center of the spell is, where I'm like basically placing it right where that dwarf was,

I'm going to put a cube around that area, hoping he's still in that square maybe, for a hypnotic pattern. We see the weapon that he had offered as a weapon against Duke Zalto, but that would it never actually used against Duke Zalto, you see popping out of one of his arms this sort of like prismatic, colorful orb that's shooting out light in different directions. He fires it, something we never actually saw him do with a khtunk, and it arcs through the air a 120 feet towards this creature where it was a moment ago. And you see this explosion of scintillating colors start going off, being projected like from this drone. It looks kind of like the Luke Skywalker like combat drone where it's just shooting colors in different directions like

beep boop beep boop these beams are going off if the creature is in that area it would make a wisdom saving throw if it's not in the area nothing happens this orb is launched off into the night sky and lands perfectly in your targeted area as calculated by witted and the rave lights just start to happen and there's a 15-foot radius cube of party happening just off to the side of the walled-in area of the tower. And that's what we see. It's Wim's turn. Wimmy, let me go first. Wim nods at you and gestures like, be my guest. Thanks, Wimmy. Right, it's your turn. Red draws this arrow from his quiver. One that we've never seen before, it almost looks like mundane, as mundane as can be,

almost if you drew an arrow on paper, like the simplest arrowhead, the simplest shaft and feathers that basically do nothing. And he draws it into his bow and searches roughly the area that she just was and fires. And I don't even know if this will work. but I'm going to read the full text. I'm going to use a seeking arrow. Using divination magic, you grant your arrow the ability to seek out your target,

allowing the arrow to curve and twist its path in search of its prey. When you use the option, you don't make an attack roll for the attack. Instead, choose one creature you have seen in the past minute. The arrow flies toward that creature, moving around corners if necessary,

and ignoring three quarters cover and half cover. If the target is within the weapons range, and there is a path large enough for the arrow to travel to the target, it must make a dexterity saving throw. On a fail, it takes damage as if it were hit by an arrow plus an extra 1D6 force, and you learn the target's location. On a successful save, it takes half damage, and you don't learn the location. Okay. So it's not explicitly for invisibility. I think it's meant to be curved, but nothing in that text, to me, says that it wouldn't work for invisible or, right? Like, all it says is...

A creature you had seen, not a creature you can see. In the last minute. Exactly. So I'd seen it in the last minute, and it says it basically carves its path towards the creature. Sorry, I'm reading it again for myself. Tim is deciding whether he would let this work. Because I honestly don't know where this dwarf is. So, like, I'm...

It's conditional on, like, what is what this dwarf did. that can this thing reach it. It's really just a, it kind of goes. I like this. This is cool. Seeking you out. This would be so fucking rad. But also, because when I'm thinking about Blink,

and I don't know if Ethereal John is the same as Blink, you're actually not on the material plane. That's the question. Yeah, that feels like more of the crux. I agree. If this thing's on another plane, I have no reason to think a Seeker Arrow. The funny thing is, that's what I was thinking about. I'm like, will it go find the nearest port?

It flies all the way back to... It's like meole near like 40 days later. This thing just wings out of nowhere. I agree. But then in that context, it would be the same as if I fired guiding bolt at it. Like it would be like it's not on this plane. Yes. It seems like it would hit.

Which I'm happy to waste. But here's what I would like an official ruling on. Because I'm happy if this thing is on an ethereal plane. But I do think this would hit an invisible creature. Yeah. It's like that Guardians of the Galaxy area. Exactly. Exactly.

And also I think that explains the total cover omission because if you have a fully sealed area, then the arrow can't get to you then. Like it needs an opening of some kind to get through, but it will find an opening. I love this kind of like crunchy pedantic. Yeah. Crunchy pedant. This is true rules lawyering because I'm about to cite. a previous case. There is another item.

There's an item called the Seeker Arrow or the Seeker Dart or something. It sounds like we're using a modified version because I happen to know that, or at least recall, that one version, at least, of the Seeker Arrow required you to say the name of the individual.

I did not hear that's anywhere in the text. But that's the one that came out in Horde of the Dragon Queen where the elemental cultists had it. So I just know that they kind of show up in this adventure. I don't know where we got our seeker arrows from, but I know that that's like what they would use, basically, but it sounds like the text is different on your version.

What does it look like when it fails to find his target? I think it just acts like a normal arrow. It comes back. It goes back. Goes straight through and fires into the like the stone wall of the tower and just reverberates. It's almost like Red's magic is always very of the earth. You know what I mean?

Like the way he does his primeval awareness, where he senses, it's like he just puts his ear to the ground or his head to the ground. So I love the idea of the arrow not finding its target being almost like a stick trying to find water

the way that you would hold that like Y-shaped stick. The dowsing rod. The dowsing rod, yeah. And like he fires an arrow out to sort of find it. And when it doesn't hit, it's not like a,

damn, it's like a, okay, she's not here. She's not on this plane at least. Either that or you're like, oh shit, did I fire the right one? Or is that just a normal arrow? That's what I'd be asking. Oh my God, it turned into the tower.

For just a moment, a response to your voice, my computer just like zooms out to register the whole tower is the threat. Like, wee, wee, no, no, stop it. I don't know that that's necessarily what happened here. I think we've got a dimensional slipper on us. You see me like looking around nervously. Yeah, not only does the arrow not seem to strike a target, but it doesn't twist or bend in the air to seek anything.

at all. All right. Thank you missed. So then should I do something stupid for my bonus action? Does he see him? What about me

if I'm being special? I'm going to roll advantage. Do I see him now? What about now? What about now? What if I look real? What if I open my eyes like me? What if I put my eyes back

like the clockwork orange? I Tim have the lucky feet. I'd like to roll again. Yeah, he's invisible. You can't see him. I said I'd like to roll again. What about now? Slighting a Honda across the table.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I do have a surprise. I had a guy who had never played D&D once, and he's just like, no, no, no, no, what happens is this. And I'm like, oh, damn, oh, damn, you've beaten the game. You've beaten it out. He just didn't accept that an 18 hit him,

and I had no power over him. I was like, this incredible. It's like, let's pretend with a five. year old and the five year old's like no no now now we're pretending that you're the princess that's when you're like okay so now it happens yeah tell me in the next part of the story yeah they're going back to your place to eat popcorn red looks over his shoulder to whim sorry whim i don't i don't see him but he'll be back any second and he'll just sort of whiff his turn no bonus no second attack okay it's no whiff that seeking area was cool as hell

ah maybe he'll shoot at a rodent nearby dinner for later Roll the hit road. He shoots straight up. I want to roll lucky. I want to shoot straight up so that by the time she pops back in, it has a one chance to come back down. Do that. I'm going to sign a 1D00 number to all five of us and then see who it hits later.

It's like he can shoot their guns in the air. Oh, no. We did it. Yeah. That's my turn. Wim is going to prep. dimension door, I think. She's going to ready her action that if this monster appears within striking distance of her, she is going to use her reaction to get the hell out of dodge. And her

targeted landing area is back by the wall of the tower. So she's intending to essentially have an escape option for herself in case somebody shows up. I'm so smart. Doran is going to look around sort of stunned. It puts his crossbow back on his back. It says, I'm done fooling around

with that. And he hefts his axe up. And when that thing comes back around, I'll make it pay. And he's going to ready an action so that if it comes into space during this next little bit, then he's going to use his a axe to attack with advantage and hopefully causing some spite against this creature.

Fuck that guy. Thanks, Timiel. I love that. I pictured Doran like a baseball batter like swinging or a splitter like batter up. Sticking his booty way out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Adjusting his crotch a little. Spitting, yeah, more than a little.

A wad of something in my mouth. Bada, but da, blah, but a, like tobacco. Yeah. Some more nothing happens. God damn it. That's too much nothing. It's getting quiet out here. He's getting too quiet.

A little too red. A little too red. Same hat. Timil's turn? So nothing happens. You're looking at me really mad. No, no, no. I'm thinking.

I'm using the brain. Yeah, hard. Should we head to the tower? Should we just run towards the tower? Maybe... Look, it's more defensible, but there's only one target. I think being out in the open, at least for me, is definitely preferable. I would have a clear shot at it.

We could split the party. Bad idea, Doran. Remember when Jack died? But what about Chaos Hammer? And Doran points at the tower, following Timiel's prompt. Look, if he's in there, he's not any help right now anyway. He was hiding, so let's just... No, I mean, what if this creature just decided that they don't want to be around?

and we could be standing here for hours. Then we wait for hours, Doran. We're hunting. Why don't we make our way towards the tower? Because it wants us to. Well, at least get close. Not in. Listen, every dwarf that we've found that's dead is inside that tower.

Why do you think that is? There's no escape. That's why I said, not in, just close. Having 360 around us and multiple people focusing on one target out in the open when it pops back in is the best way to kill this thing. Is there no convincing you, child? I mean, listen, meta, if you think it's more fun to go in, sure. I just, I don't want to go. I just, dear, you listen to me?

Just go, I'm saying, let's go closer. If we move as a party closer to the tower, it might, it might push this creature to, like, show back up. Yeah, but also, there's no benefit moving to me. All right, let's stay here for another round. Let's just wait patiently, see what happens. All right. The end of my turn is going to undo the help action and the spite anyway. but I will ready a green flame blade for when this creature reappears.

Again, within, you know what? We'll go ahead and within 120 feet of me. So I've readied green flame blade and then I'll look over at you with my bonus action and I'll be like, Doren, we just got to lock in and get ready for when this thing reappears. And I will give you Bartik inspiration. Oh, only if it works for you. Don't do, like if it takes up spell spots or whatever. You know what?

I think this is, what do we need the consumable? in the spell slots for for fights and we're in a fight let's look at go let's go you guys started this one fresh do not worry my bardic inspirations refresh on a short rest please take the bardic done i'm not going to argue cool it's a d8 all right anything else to meal uh just sitting there ass clenched just so tight yes are you clenching too i mean how could you not i know we have no idea what this thing is where did it's your turn it's out there and very much joining in this like reverse huddle of all of us like back to back like looking out at wherever this thing might appear from uh whittit is going to ready a spell and it seems

to like reach back with his gauntlet and pull up this sort of gun weapon device it looks kind of like steampunk almost organ pipes it's not clear what kind of a gun this would be it doesn't look particularly dangerous or impressive more like a launcher of some kind and you hear here like this like rumbling start inside of it. So hopefully he'll get to do this. But he's looking around and you see the pipes rotating around looking for target. With a creature seemingly gone, you anxiously await for any sign of its return. Okay, now I'd just like to thank our dear Patreon supporters.

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we're going to take this clean and get it in one take. Oh, one take, Nick, here we go. You're great. Don't change, don't change a thing. It's me. It's me she's talking about. I'm just kidding. It's not you, it's him.

The hell? It's not you. It's me. It's not you. It's him. She harkens back to the last use of silvery barbs where she, like, spat on the ground in front of the hydra. And she just hawks a luggy directly into this thing's gaping maw. Ooh, gross. So gross. And now the serious one, though.