Dice Shame - 2-181 | 'Return To Haunt'

Episode Date: February 12, 2026

Something approaches as the party looks to survive...______________________________________________________________________________________________________________Imagine your best game of D&D. The shocks, the twists and turns, the moments that can’t be caught because you just had to be there. That’s Dice Shame.Join our DM Jo, her husband Harlan, their brother Alex & their friends Nic & Timm as they experience those unmissable, gut-wrenching, heart-aching, joy-filled moments.This legendary AP releases a brand new episode every Thursday morning at 1:20 am!Content Warning: animal death, swearing, violence, claustrophobia Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What's the plan? Run for the Von and Dodd? Get in there and get that thing working! Oh, no. You saw that too? No, thanks for asking. Keep pressure on these two that we're already engaging. We're not going to be able to get to it. Hold on, women!

I didn't go to four years of Shadowfell school. I'm not sure if I could do it. It's a more terrible beast than these giants all combined. There's no reason to let him go alone. We should move up as well and hold the position. No, we get it. You'd have to tell me twice. That's okay.

and let's go. Welcome back to Dice Shame. This is Season 2, Episode 181, Return to Haunt. MVP this week is Comedy Fan 1095, once again, for their submission to our Horse Names channel. They picked the name Horan, which ended up being our favorite. After all, it goes along with Doran and Orin and Lorin and Goren and probably a lot more. Either way, congratulations, Combin.

comedy fan, you're this week's MVP. We have a horse channel? We do now. All right, shall we do this? Yeah, let's play some D&D. Woo! Our party of heroes is in the middle of fighting. Some fire giants at the base of the Von and Dodd.

When they see another set of giants cresting the hill with fear in their eyes, it's top of the round. Whim's turn, I feel like this might change things slightly. Red shouts out from his invisible position towards Temeel. You see in this? What the hell is that mean? Well, it can only be one thing, one of two things. It's either something here to help us or something here to hurt us.

What's the plan? Run for the Von and Dodd? Tamil is very clearly torn. I mean, she's looking back and forth between the giants behind her and to Witted's approach. approach on the Von and Dodd. And I think that she's just going to scream out, Witted, get in there and get that thing working! A look of, like, desperation on Temeel's face as she kind of throws a glance back over to Red.

Yeah, Red sees it. There's no reason to let him go alone. We should move up as well and hold the position. And keep fire, keep pressure on these two that we're already engaging. Yes. Witted's voice comes out as the Bessie voice. Don't have to tell me. be twice. And then he just picks up speed,

bov, heading right towards the Vodendat. Amazing. I think Wim is, I mean, she's hidden right now behind this stump, maintaining concentration on Red's haste. But she also wants to move hopefully, like, safely toward the Von and Dodd, and she is not as fast as Red. I think maybe, I don't know, I don't want to burn a high level spell slot and Dimension Door is fourth level.

No, don't Dimension Door. Yeah, just fucking book it. Yeah. That's so funny. I was just about to be like, I'm going to run back in Dimension Door with her. I know, because if we have to fight the thing they're running from, we're going to need all of my guns. That's, I mean. It's probably the hunger.

Yeah. I mean, I can fall back on Marshall stuff, so, but. Oh, who's he? Marshall? My buddy. For what it's worth. Witt is also just trying to be almost conservative. Like it's a dangerous situation where he's saving spell slots at this point.

And he has fallback options for combat. I just thought that given the situation and his instincts, he would probably just be aligned it towards the Vodendod rather than fighting. No, for sure. Smart call. Hearing her allies make military plans across the battlefield with each other, whim nods to herself and breaks cover. She flees north. kind of swinging around the fire giant that right now is occupied with Tamil,

trying to keep some space between it and her, but also trying to approach the Von and Dodd as quickly as possible. So that's going to be her turn. She's just going to run. Excellent. All right. Red. Yeah.

As a bonus action, I'm going to cast fairy fire on this giant in front of Tamil and I. Noice. He has to make a deck save with a pretty low DC. Five. Yes, that's much slower than my DC. I'm really my crap. The DC was 14. Amazing.

The giant becomes outlined in red's sort of mystic aura, even though he wouldn't see it that way. But this sort of glowing outline appears upon him. Advantage to attack him and... He can't go invisible, right? Is that one? Correct. It would negate any kind of invisibility or concealment.

Also, you get to pick a color to the fire. To me, that's a very important detail. Red. The map is so huge and the token is so big that applying those tiny little designs does nothing. So I have to just put all of the colors on it and then that way I'll hopefully remember. It's like Technicolor Fairy Fire.

Yes. It's Fire Giant and the amazing Technicolor Fairy Fire. My favorite musical from Vastika. Amazing. I also do like the idea that you, picked a red for your fairy fire. It's like, quick, attack the one with the red fire. Damn it.

Cool. And then, yeah, I'm going to attack. With advantage, right? With advantage. Double advantage. A devontage. It's not really, but that is a 23 to hit. Yes.

And he's been hit before, correct? Correct. Then I will do my Colossus Slayer. That's 22 damage. I will attack again. 24 to hit. 25 damage. Nice.

And with haste, I'll attack a third time. Yes. Ooh. 19 hit. Yeah. Soo! Soo! Soo!

Sue! And that will be 21 damage. Wow. Nice. Great round for Red. Big numbers. Well, that ain't all. Red is then going to book it.

He's going to follow Whimmy's tail and actually move past her. He is going to use his feline agility, which will allow him to double his movement for a total of Oh, I'm hastened. Yeah, you double. So calculate your total speed and then just double it. So Red runs the Vonnegut. Great. But you're going to go around the fire giant so it's not to incur the opportunity attack.

I'm invisible without even incurring opportunity. Oh, yeah, never mind. No. I go right between his fucking legs. I get it right here. So I run 100 feet as the crow flies to the bottom of the Von and Dodd and then spend the next 20 feet climbing the fucking thing. Looking for a door for Witted to get in because I got the key. That is Redd's turn.

Redd, do you want to make a perception about this Von and Dodd being that you're right now? Thanks for asking. Great. Next up? Yes, I would. Yes. Did you imagine? I don't know, maybe you got other stuff to do.

I do, but that's okay. 18. 18. From your current advantage, I mean, you know when you get up, like right up on a big thing? It like fills your whole vision, right? Like, you cannot see a door. You don't, there's no, like, blinking arrows pointing, like, this is the place to put the key. Right.

So this is going to take some findings. Seems like a design flaw. Yeah. Okay. Red will spend a few seconds poking around. I mean, I have 20 feet of movement. Cool. So when I get to the Vonundot, I'll spend that 20 feet looking around for a door, like, walking in a circle, I suppose.

Yeah. You, you approach the. base of this colossus. And as I said before, it's like buried up to its high chins in mud still. And there are like these tract marks in the earth where the fire giants

were digging it out. Obviously this is unfinished work. And like just above you, the machine is like immense, impressive. Yeah. Raging. I'm like thinking of the square footage.

that you'd have to cover climbing this thing, looking for this door. Like, what if put the door on the left side, on, you know, around where his belt is? Or the door could be up. What if it's in its dick? Well, let's look at the obvious places first. Dick, but...

But it's the butt hole. It's a butt hole. It's a butt first. You go butt first, Tim? See, I would go dick first, but if you want to go butt first, I'm not against it. Let's find this out.

Doran, it's your turn. Jesus, Doran. Save us. Save us. Save us, Doran. Make it worse, Doran. Doren, turning to chaos hammer and seeing a look in his eyes, says, You saw that too?

They're running from something. I don't want to meet what they're running from. Is it making any sense to roll something here to see if I'm picking up on that, right? If you're picking up on what? I can roll for super eyes. I don't know. Everybody gets one super eyes. Sets or C or C or.

You want to use your super eyes here? Okay. Yeah, Doran. You want to perceive? Fuck yeah, you can perceive. Perceive the fuck out of this. Roll perception. Yeah.

Yeah. I do. I do want to perceive, okay? I want you to. And that's going to be an unnatural 20. Oh! Doren iron fist. Super eyes activated.

Super eyes activated. Form of weird dwarf. Yeah. Yeah, Doren. From over the edge of the ridge, these giants are like tearing down at you. It's hard when we're doing a six second per round combat where everyone has to take their turn to kind of illustrate that these giants are like running full tilt and they haven't moved past when I described them but they're still running. You know what I mean? No, we get it.

The crest of this ridge where the giants are appearing, mist is beginning to creep down into the valley with you. Oh, good. Additionally, Doran, you hear a terrible sound. that sets your teeth on edge because it is something that you have heard before. It is the hissing sound of steel

being quenched like a terrible harp string that just like almost reverberates in your bones. You remember hearing this sound before Kralov died. Right. Uh-oh. I remember that. This is the thing that killed

Kraylaught. It is only known as The thing that killed Kralov. Yeah. Yeah. And that's what the giants are fucking terrified of. Cool. You hear that? You hear that?

Yeah. That's... What is it? That's a more terrible beast than these giants all combined. Quick. Let's get to the Von and dot. Doran also jets. Cool.

Oh, you can make it there on one. Mm-hmm. Chaos Hammer follows you up on your heels and, uh, witted. It's your turn. Absolutely. This is setting up nicely where as people are getting to and climbing up the Vodnandad, it's going to fly right face to face with the construct. And there is very much this moment of like an image of a reflection, a tiny version of the Vonindad flying up to it and looking up.

Very almost like paternal like little creature looking up at big creature that's not moving at all right now, but almost looking and waving and then bowing down in this almost respectful way. A pleasure to beat you at last. Let's go. Gabbling on this, but hopefully mouth, and you see what it'd sort of try to examine around the front facial plate,

but really just try to look around the whole bone and dot, trying to find that entrance, but assuming mouth is a no-go is like, uh-oh, everywhere else is a worse eye. option. But consider the ball and starts flying around the vote and I'm trying to find that entrance. Would I be able to make like an investigation check? Yeah, please do. Absolutely. Let's go. Natural 20 on the dive for a 29 in all. We did it suddenly scanning through decades. Finding all of these ancient blueprints from ancient giant

kind like a Cthulhu style hunting through like reliquaries to find like the right scroll that would give him just a page of copied giant text of like what the Vodendod's butt might have looked like or something like that like a heist movie he's planned out every possible entrance he knows whether there is one or not yeah that's hilarious yeah that's exactly right Tim you now are almost like face to face with a lover or something like Like, you know the shape of his face, like, from your dreams. And. I caress it.

She was his face and. His butt. Two fingers of metal rubbing along the metal chin. Oh. The Vonen Dod leams forward and slams against the wall. Suddenly it's raining. We shouldn't. We should, though.

But by party. We should. It can never work. You were made by giants for destruction. God, that's funny. Witted, you are able to see up close and personal for the first time, these mechanical workings. You can see like the exhaust vent from the steam tunnels

that must exist within and how the pistons are attached in like this very specific, like, giant, but also there's probably some kind of gnomish inspiration here, maybe like proto-nomes from thousands and thousands of years ago. That was my theory. The spark of life that you want to see in those ruby eyes is missing. There's, like, some aspect of it that is dormant or not active right now. And tracing your eyes up and down the beloved limbs and torso of this figure, you don't see a door.

And then looking down into this fucking mud, you conclude that the door must be buried underneath. Oh, no. Oh, my God. It's in the legs, but the legs are buried in the mud. That's right. Oh, no. That's a good sound, right? Well, let's just say, I don't know if water walking is going to be particularly helpful for what we're trying to do next.

And he's like put his hands on his waist and is just shaking his head, looking up at the incoming giants, looking down at the mud. Desperately, recalculating, recalculating, like this is now a new consideration. Interesting. Even more than that, when you look at the approaching fire giants, whitted you with your vantage being up near the head of the Vonnedad you're able to see the pursuing monster taking almost casual strides but moving faster than what even seems possible a huge creature is pursuing these fire giants towering over them by a full chest shoulders neck and head crowned crowned by a pair of midnight-colored twisted horns,

and whose lithe black body seems to exude smoke and mist. Humanoid only in the barest sense with a torso arms bipedal, but it sees you. Its gaze pins you to the spot, almost like you are a dead moth on someone. taxidermy board and it has a collection of shining holes in what we will call its face instead of eyes. The creature is so dark that any other features are indistinguishable. Its long legs are bent backward like a goat's.

They end in cloven hooves the size of a tower shield. and it is this monster's turn in combat now. No. You guys are fucked. I love it where you say that. As you watch, anyone who is observing the fire giants on the cusp of this ridge leading down into the valley, see that the fire giant that's kind of bringing up the rear, the guy with like the flapping breast, plate, he just turns into black dust that floats away.

Whoa. Ah, and also, thank God. That's terrifying. Oh, no. Double-edged sword. Yeah, tactically advantageous. Tamil, it's your turn. Oh, cool.

Okay. Get over here, Tamil. Don't let it near the voted, Dad. It'll make it all dusty. Eek. Can I do some sort of... What would even want this be? Some sort of check to try to figure out how fast this thing is actually going.

How long is it going to take for it to get to the Vonundad? Ooh. Good cue. Well, I mean, it's only really whited who's gotten a good bead on this creature so far, because it still hasn't really crested the top of the hill yet. But if you see those horn. moving towards you as it's like climbing the ridge perhaps um it's like gliding in a way like it doesn't seem to be impeded by the ground perhaps floating or um moving in in that sort of aspect so you don't

have to really worry about it being lodged in the mud the way that like these fire giants are sitting ducks right they can't they're trudging yeah yeah yeah so it seems fast and probably flying I'll give you that. Cool. And I think Timiel's attention is probably also mostly on the fire giant in front of her and also aware of Wim who's running along. So actually the first thing that I'm going to do, she's just going to take some more shots at this giant on the move as she's running.

She's going to keep moving north as a way to get away from this thing that seems like it's coming. But she doesn't want to get close enough to the giant to give him opportunity attacks just yet. So she'll head north. with her full movement. First, she's gonna throw static one more time. And because of that wonderful fairy fire, she does so with a change, that 20, thank you. Yes.

Yes. Right. This is obscene. Yes. Too much. Okay, so that is, okay, so that's 4D6, so that's 15 plus 8, which is 23. plus another 2D8.

So 42 damage. Whoa. Static just goes through the neck and out the other side. The fire giant topples. Nice. Cool. So then the path is clear. Amazing.

She still has another, yeah, she still has another action here, sorry, another attack. And first she's going to just start closing the distance. she's going to give Wim the help action and use her gift of passage. So this is one of her gifts. The gift of passage, you and the creature you help each increase your walking speed by 10 feet

until the start of my next turn. Nice. So she gets an extra 10 feet to hustle, and so do I. And so go 40 feet. I picture you like speed walking. Yeah, yeah. Just like... Yeah, just that stupid-ass speedwalking.

Translates really well to audio, you know. We all just did a really enthusiastic, heavy in the shoulders kind of. If you're listening, they know. They know what it looks like. Power walking. Yeah, we're all doing it on the spot. Everybody stand up to a speedwalk. Here we go.

I'm going to go ahead and just, it's going to be with disadvantage, but I guess there's no reason not to just try to throw static at the other fucking. The northern fire giant? Yes. So there's one giant that's left. He's very far. He's within long range, but he's not within, like, the normal range of static. So with disadvantage, I will throw static one more time at this guy.

Just see if we can hit him. I got a 25. But let me, that's just the hang on. Oh, my God, I rolled two 15s. So I got a 25 to hit this guy. Nice. So 10 piercing and then. Whoa.

Uh-huh. Nice. 10 lightning damage. So 20, yeah, 20 damage on the far guy. Incredible. Eat it, you giant loser. Yeah. Static sort of like, the trajectory of static, like, passes in between, like, where

the Von and Dodd's arm has, like, a space between its body and just, like, perfectly aligns to skewer the fire giant and then whips around through and makes this way back to your hand. Meanwhile, you hear the sound of the fire giants crest the hill. They're panicked footfalls reverberating the ground underfoot. Do they see us, the giants? Oh, yeah. You guys are just chilling.

Not me. I'm invisible. So the fire giants move down into the valley over the lip. You watch as one of the two giants cresting the ridge, almost like clutches at his heart. and like this pulse of black energy, like runs through his veins. Oh, no. Takes like, takes damage essentially just from existing.

And then they move forward down into the valley. Oh, my God. He is having a rough time. A heart attack and running away from these things? Of all the luck. Poor guy. Uh-huh. Then he turns around actually in scobeyed.

whoops up a boulder and hurls it valiantly at the monster approaching behind him. Okay. Okay, good. Now we're talking. He should. 24 to hit. Yeah, let's go. Hello.

We cheer them on. It absorbs the rock. We always like the fire giants. We were just saying how much I love that fire giant. We're always on their side. And that's 20 bludgeoning damage. Nice. Let me just see here.

So the thing is made of it. Does he seem to take all that bludging damage? The shadowy figure stops at midair and crumbles it like paper. You know what? He's got vulnerability to rock. Really? No, I'm thinking. Hell yes.

Get the rocks. Right. Everyone to the rocks. Rock based strategies. I don't. Fuck these arrows. I'm going to shoot some rocks. Timil whips out of a guitar and starts shredding.

Oh, yeah. I love it. Yeah, I mean, I don't want to say the words DR, but DR applies here. I don't know what that means. Tim asked me if he seemed to take all that damage and I was like, no. Oh, doctor. I get it. Yeah, damage resistance.

He has a doctor. Yeah, he's not, I think he's a damage. He's got a doctor on board. Oh, he's a professional. He's a doctor. Doctor's scary. I didn't go to four years of Shadowfell School to be called Missing. Or monster.

Anyway, sorry. Shut up. You're a doctor of journalism. And I think fire giant number two is going to dash. So he makes his way a little further down into the valley, trying to get away from this monster as much as possible. Meanwhile, the fire giant that is just to the northwest of the Von and Dodd, sort of the one that's closest to our party of heroes,

who had just gotten ripped through by a jacking. Avalin still perceives our party of heroes to be posing a bit of a threat, especially since they're all crawling all over the Vonned Dodd now. Big a picture, man. Come on. So he's going to make his way down toward the base of the Von and Dodd. He lifts up a rock and throws it at Captain Chaos Hammer. What a jerk.

Doorn, your boyfriend. That's an 18 to hit. Chaos Hammer. However, ah, 18 AC. And so he takes 35 bludgeoning damage. Oh, that's chaos hammer. Doran exclaims as he gets bludgeoned by a rock. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I mean, he like spits out a tooth and he's like, it's all right, Doran, let's go. Jesus. Yeah. That's okay, Doran, let's go. Wasn't even his tooth. That's right. He just keeps a cheek full of him when he goes into combat.

He's one of my old orc teeth that I have. That's it. Top of the order. We got Wim. Run Wimmy! Wimmy has an extra 10 feet of movement, I believe. Yes, man. Fabulous.

She's able to make it straight away to the Vonadad. So she sort of hunkers down in its shadow and then smells the jerky that heralds her friend Redd. I'm here, Wimmy, I'm here. I mean, she can't hear you because she can't read your lips or anything. I touch her shoulder. Ah, she gives you a big thumbs up. And Wim has made her way down to the meeting point.

Meanwhile, Red, hasted, invisible. Red shoots his head up to Witted, who's still flying around the machine. And he shouts, where's the door? No door. No door. It's under the mud. We're not going to be able to get to it. We'll need to dig down.

I think this thing's going to hit it. us first though and he gestures at the incoming creature. Not if I have anything to say about it. And red saves the day. Oh? Oh, good. Few. What is the Von and Dodd?

Is it a construct? It is. Constructs are creatures. Red can cast waterwalk on creatures and water walk will make things that are underground move up at a rate of 60 feet per round. So red. casts waterway on the Vaughnandad.

It's true. Clava boy. Clava boy. I hear Google typing. Construct is a creature type. I know because I googled it. You're not wrong. I'm going to try to find every hole here.

Oh, is there a weight? Listen to this. If you target a creature submerged in liquid, the spell carries the target to the surface of the liquid at a rate of 60 feet per round. Yeah. Wow. I mean.

Wow. So Red wastes his second level spell, his last third level spell. Uh-huh. He puts his hand on the Vaughn and Dodd, and he casts Waterwalk. Come on, buddy, we need you above the ground. So you are ending the first instance of Waterwalk. No, I can cast multiples. It's just, it's not a, I can have it.

It's not concentration. Yeah, it's not concentration. Can you cast Waterwalk twice? I Google that too. Yes, you can cast Waterwalk spell multiple times in D&5E, either by using multiple spells lots, which I'm doing. Joe, of course. It's all buttoned up, isn't.

Because I know Joe, and I know I knew her questions. You want to hear my tabs? It's this. Haste, because I wanted to know, waterwalk. Then I wrote, can you cast waterwalk twice? And our constructs creatures 5E. Those are like four things. I was like, I know how our brain's going to work.

I feel like this is when you scoot to the back of the D&D manual, Storm King's Thunder. It's like, how do you get the Von and Dodd out? Well, one of the ways you can cast waterwalk on it. And it's like, I just thought it was on my turn. I was like, I wonder, I literally was like, I wonder if water walk out of work on it. And it did. So I think this is genius. Thank you.

I thought so too. So you apply your magic to the Von and Dodd and he rises at a speed of 60 feet per round. Was that what you said? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So entirely raises this construct. It's like Luke on Dagobahn.

And he's raising the axe wing up out of the. the swamp. Hold on, Winnett! Wim starts whistling like she's fucking R2. And thick rivulets of mud just run down the calves as the base of this Colossus is exposed now

and cleanly stands atop the quagmire in this valley. You're not able to immediately visualize where the door is, but it must be here somewhere underneath all this frickin mud. Great job, Red. Thank you. I mean, I think that's worth inspiration, Frank. Oh, thank you. Great job. Nice. Yeah. With the Von and Dodd in in front of him, Red runs and spends his next action and the movement on his turn to find the

door. Mm-hmm. Speedy Red. What are you doing to, to like, find the door? I would imagine that, yeah, it's caked in mud. So red is just, maybe he's grabbed his dagger and he's like scraping at the mud, like, trying to find like any sort of valley that the dagger would sort of get caught in. You know, he's like kind of scraping across to get the seam of the door beneath the mud. And yeah, he spends an entire action sort of searching. Cool. With that effort expended, with the hasted movement and, you know, using all of your cunning to find the entrance. Red, you scrape your dagger along what feels like an edge, a hard edge of some kind, and then it comes to a stop. And it's like there's a,

there's a seam and then a plate maybe. I think I found it. Over here. And Red will like scoop away the mud and like, I guess pry it open or reach for his key. I mean, probably prided open. But I hate to tell you that while you're doing this, you actually scratched it and devalued it by a boat. No. Yeah, the resale value is just.

We can't return it. Donodat, nothing is not fragile. It's not even a box. He just got it. Red, you scrape the mud away from this

suspect area of the Vonidod. and it's clearly a door of some kind. There's like a control panel type area, a keyhole cover, a door handle. It's like a pretty complicated set of maneuvers. It's not just like, oh, here's a key. Okay. Yeah, red starts fucking with that.

Yeah, great. Next up, Doran. When I was standing in front and like right against the Vaughan Dodd, is it silly to think that there was somewhere to stand or hold on to really easily when this thing started to rise out of the mud. That's not silly to think that at all. Like is there, it's covered in all kinds of intricate components and gears and pistons and like,

it's very elaborate looking machine. Well, I guess Doran would like to and hopefully try and convince Chaos Hammer in that moment when he starts feeling this thing shift. He doesn't know what's going on. but he knows that something's happening. And I think Doran grabs hold of the Von and Dodd and says to Chaos Hammer, hold on, you know, and we kind of like stand on a ledge. Would you please roll an athletics check to see if you can like grab and hold and kind of climb onto the side of this? That is going to be a 21.

Marvelous. Not only are you able to do this. You find like a purchase underneath your feet. some like some like almost pseudo platform that you can stand atop of and you rise to height of maybe 15 feet above the ground level.

Oh wow. Okay. Is that too high? You want to scale down a little bit? No, no, no. I thought we were growing 60 feet so that's actually good. Oh no.

Well, it's not going to float above the ground and it was only buried like calf deep in the mud. You know what I mean? It's not levitate. No, this is good because. It's just walking on the water. Yeah, yeah.

No, I didn't want it to be like death falling height. Yeah, when you inevitably fall. 15 feet's great. So then I think from this position, Doren, having just watched Chaos Hammer get crushed with a rock, is going to kind of take the sort of a protective action story-wise and maybe take a ready-in-action. Okay. For in case something comes into reach. Cool. Sounds great.

Well, I guess other than that, I mean, that's kind of my turn, eh? Looking around, is there anything else that's interesting? Yeah, from this perch you get to see the monster crest the hill as it bears down on these giants. It is, as you feared, the creature that killed one of your party members. Krayloff died to this monster's, I believe it just pointed a finger at him and he died. We're not in combat, right? We are in combat currently, yes. Are we in combat?

For sure. But we are currently in combat? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, we have been for the past one and a half recording session. Well, I know we have, like, I guess I was thinking. Yeah, yeah. Okay, never mind. Well, because we're still an initiative.

That's how you know. It's pretty funny, though. You've got to admit, Alex. That's a pre-fight question. I don't mean that. Yeah, I read about that. So are we? Fighting for

Like, what do you think? I know we don't have a minute Because a minute's 10 rounds. I think what Alex is trying to say is like we're not fighting this thing yet, right? Correct. I mean, that, I think that might be

You're right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was. I just, I love it. Listen, but you see your features. You want to use them. I get it. I get it.

Yeah, you got to ask. Yeah, sir. But it was. We're not in combat, right? Are we? Okay, okay. Suppose there's a little bit of panic that's starting to set in, watching how this thing is like taking the lives of these giants with only like not even touching them.

You see one like gripping its chest. Meanwhile, Chaos Hammer as he's rising up alongside Doran, gaining altitude on the leg of the Von and Dodd, points at red and goes, red, take a shot. Of course, on the archer, baby. Baby, I'm hitting the giant to the northwest, the one closest to Chaos Hammer. Fabulous. The one I'm assuming he wants me to kill. Sure.

The one that just pegged him with the rock. That makes sense. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know. I appreciate you. I'm just a baby. You're just a baby. Baby's first DM.

I just a baby. 22 damage. Fabulous. I presume you hit with some. No. Like it's actful. All right, that's Chaos Hammer's turn. Witted.

Widdid's going to start flying down there and as he sort of lands next to Red peeking around the leg almost like he's considering lining up a shot to Reddy against the incoming threat he turns and pops open the helmet and says I could ready a shot here I could help you guys

I'm not sure if I could do it Just get inside Wittitton don't worry about it bud you're more use in there and red is like got his back to Witted he just took a shot at this encroaching giant And, like, that's when Witted puts his gauntlet on Red's shoulder and, like, tries to really get his attention. Are you sure? And you feel Red's hand on the gauntlet.

He says, of course. I trust you, buddy. All right, I'm going. And he tries to feel around for the door for a way to pop it open. Yeah. Um, roll another investigation check for me. Oh, no. A natural one.

No. No. Shame. Shame. Shame. Shame. Shame. Shame, shame, shame, shame, shame, shame, shame, shame.

My flashed genius will not help here, I don't think. Not in any meaningful way, I don't think. Yeah, I mean, Witted. Like, how do you fail that? This is your whole thing. This is my whole thing. And I did get a 10, but assuming a 10 total still does not cut it. I am like, I think it's the classic, like, key horror movie.

I got the keys to the car kind of thing. keep dropping them. I'm making silly, stupid mistakes, just like panicking in this moment of being flustered that I'm with the Von and Dodd now. With a 10, though, Tim, you know what Witted does note something important as you are fumbling with the keyhole and the control panel? There's a sound coming from inside. The Von and Dodd. And it's not been happening this whole time. It's just starting. And it sounds like the beginning of a rumble. It's almost like the sound of like a jet engine like starting from far away. Witted just puts one gauntleted hand reverently, like very slowly onto the door and just looks up in awe. And like not I don't think he's able to speak. I think he wants

store and everyone and he just goes, uh, uh, what body, what? And just slowly turns then. He, it's awake. Okay, now I'd just like to thank our dear Patreon supporters. I screw all their names down here. Just bear with me. Okay, thank you too. Lita J. Christopher.

Colin Burkhart. Merlin. Adam Frey. Liz. Ruth Ann Reed. Trin. Lorelei Feldman. Merrick's Moon.

J.D. Scotty. Haley. Joshua Nance. Nicky. Queen. Shannon Waldner. Wren?

Cass. Joy Robinson. Melinda Curley. S.ray 96. Moon. Jeanette. H.D. Gabby.

Tow.Cettle. Izzy. Anna Lena, Gareth Bradshaw, Abriel, Mizra, Nibia, Nerd Fairy, Oakland, Abby Mae Birkin, Quinn, Manderpants, Stab, Volkentrol, Keely Hill, Pan, Axel, Rabid and Cheese, Absolute Ocelli Ocelli Behally, Danny, Seer of Time, Wanderer Fen, Luna de Maria, Feli, Bird, Starlight, A.K. Trash Panda, Amanda Nicole, Lockwork Phoenix, Lickrott, Kite, Alicia Duh, O.B., Marimo, Luke, Fisher, Knox the Nightshark, Sunny, Zill Street, Liz, Kara, Caspian, BeanFiend, Jagger Man Jensen, Roses of Envy, Karen Duley, Minty, Percy, This Guy Could, Hydrus, Martina, Celeste Jedlick, Lysanne Kleckner, Nick D, Slate Blue Flowers, Sparks, Marino, Ren Gillespie

Scoutgar Delicate Jaws Shank Sakura aka Cam Veritas Tell Laura

Jane Sasha Busing Star O3 Snicksnack Jinks Jaron Blair Nukwom Conzo Como

Trinity Morgan King Brona Lorrus Bart O WON Art Jacks Axe

Arrestu Libet Reed Madame Wiesel Salamandra, Ray Silver Tongue, T.K. Haste, Heather Newman, Marshmorrow, Mittens, Furn Ferguson, Harry, Immortal Dragon, Sarah Tonin, Decu Loves Hair, Dylan Ibb, Jesse, Rachel Isaacs, Red Wing Rising, and Milk. It's a good thing I have this all written down because I would never be able to remember some of these names. Have a great one and see you around the battlefield. From over the edge of the... Garden wall. Thank you.

I was joking. Over the edge of the ridge? Thank you. Yes. And it sounds like the beginning of a rumble. There's a raccoon in there. Yeah. Ladies and gentlemen, let's get ready to rumble.

You guys are such brothers. Does that Alex did too? Yeah. Yeah. Get a edge. Seriously? It's so funny. Idiots.

High five.