Dice Shame - 2-48 | 'On Solid Ground'

Episode Date: July 27, 2023

Imagine your best game of D&D. The shocks, the twists and turns, the moments that can’t be caught because you just had to be there. That’s Dice Shame.Join our DM Jo, her husband Harlan, their brother Alex & their best friends Rob and Alex as they experience those unmissable, gut-wrenching, heart-aching, joy-filled moments.This legendary AP releases a brand new episode every Thursday morning at 1:20 am!https://www.extra-life.org/participant/INVICTUSContent Warning: swearing, violence.Part of the Rusty Quill Network Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We get advantage on his ashes if we attack again. I singed those furs. Great teamwork. Drop a big a bowl to this time. Oh shit. It's actually the Red Bull Tribe. Loser terrain. Stick around for a while. I threw a hot water bottle at him. I guess we could shame it, but I don't feel bad.

Oh my god! Take that compadink. Why did you put me in here? But he's short, though. Ball bearings go up his butt. And the barbarian dies, and with his falling body, the cave shakes ever so slightly, and it's the lagtite falls on cure. Killing the dog

Kruel and unusual With my last breath I curse Kieran Welcome back to Dyshane This is season 2, episode 48 On Solid Ground MVP this week is Jam And they're on episodes

78. They were nominated by Anonymous who says the way that they feel about Torin makes them feral. Ooh, baby. If you want to nominate someone for MVP, swing by our Discord and fill out the Google form. Anyone can be MVP. Even you. Extra Life is coming back, 2023. However, we got the date wrong. We told you earlier it was October 7th when it's actually going to be September 23rd for us. Yes, it's a little different than usual, but we'll be streaming for 24 hours and aiming to raise 5. thousand dollars it all starts midnight on the 23rd right up until the 24th so stop by you can check out the link at extra dash life.org slash participant slash invictus it's going to be a lot of fun and a lot of work all right should we play some d and d let's do it would you rather be

lied to and told something that you are happier to hear, or would you rather be told the truth regardless of how difficult it might be to hear? Lied to. Really? It depends on how consequential it is. Right. Yeah, but I can't, if we if we can't say depends, I'd go lie to. Well, you could say consequential. I like where Rob's going. Oh, then absolutely depends on how consequential. I don't want you to lie to me about the broken tire in the car, but I definitely want you lie to me if you don't like my shirt and we're about to walk out the door. For a liar, I think there is an ethical burden of

is this truth going to do more good or more harm? Exactly. And there's a, you know, if you're already going to lie about something and you wanted to find another ethical line to, you know, walk down, that's the whole thing with, well, we've created white lies because that's a whole, you know, glue to keep society together or whatever.

And I guess my reasoning to say, lie to is, at least in my feelings and experience, most lies are stupid. Like, most lies, the vast majority, they're inconsequential stupid nothings. You know, it's rare that you have the wump of, if I don't find out the truth about

this, you know, my adopted child will never be, like, you know, so my incident, well, just lie to me because it's like, did you listen to my show? Do you like my shirt? Are these shoes good? For me, I don't care about that shit. It's the opposite because I feel like as someone who's been through a fucking

divorce, there are some things that you should probably not be lied to about, and they're very consequential. And I would much prefer hearing the terrible, honest truth and be able to make decisions based on that. I hate your fucking hair, okay? I hate it. I mean, yeah, that's the bottom rung of the latter, for sure, scaling up to stuff that I don't really want to talk about on a podcast. But, like, Like, 100% I would way rather always be told the truth. I'm with Joe on this. Even with some of like, there's, there's like, there's like the minors of minor stuff where it's like, you know, like, do you love it or do you love it?

And you're like, yeah, I love it. And you're like, it's fine, like in your head. And like, that's, that's one thing. But I'm like, even, even lots of the small stuff, I'd rather hear the truth. I'd rather just have the person be honest with me because if all that small stuff builds up and I find out that you've just been like humoring me for so long, that's going to hit with the same weight as if I found out that it was something big that you've told me because I've had people like, you know, like shitty friends do stuff like

that where you find it afterwards that it's just a bunch of bullshit and you're like, oh, okay, this whole time was, it was, the whole thing was a lie. So it's just like, I'd rather just know at the top. Rob. Oh, no, I was going to jump in with a story and then I realized I don't want to tell that story on the podcast. but yeah yeah fair they're listening to it there's a lot of stories and i'm like ooh let's not go there but then i was like oh i think that guy listens to the show oh oh oh i can't say that's oh no spill it rob name and shame i'm like say it i'll cut it out he edits the show too

we're calling you out jeff yeah you know bob he's like fuck it let's docks all these people yeah everyone who's ever hurt you we're going to lay them all out right now let's do it it was more about, I have a tolerance for people who are just bullshitting them if I can clock that they're just bullshitting me and telling stories and not doing anything. But I had a friend of mine who absolutely has no tolerance for that because it, whatever, his life led him to a place, just can't stand it at all.

So I introduced these two people one night in university and it was horrible. It was just the worst. Oh, no. You ever introduced two friends and it just goes the worst it possibly could? I don't do it anymore. Yeah. It was bad news.

It's like referring somebody for a job, you know, that you don't know extremely well. because if you like you're like oh they might work out here but if they don't work out then that's going to reflect badly on me and that bad idea overall but at my work I get $2,000 for referring people yeah that was very different you weren't referring friends you were referring students that you taught how to do the job that's called a recommendation I had a pretty good handle on whether they could fucking handle yeah exactly it's not like hey I don't know this this guy probably would be good at this guy hasn't spilled any blood at all

all. It's great. It'll be a bit, but he's looked it right up. No acid spilled. Dr. Acula. He's very intense. Loves night shifts. It's great. But yeah, I mean, in general, I definitely get the points about like, yeah, I don't, I don't want a lot of, you know, little things to build up.

But if the truth is only going to hurt me and if I'll never know it, it doesn't make a difference, I don't need to know. Yeah. See, that's where I'm at, too. Depends on the, on the magnitude of it, you know. And that's why, I mean, hey, when we're playing Duns and Dragons, lie to me. I'll tell you all what you need to hear. Yes, nothing more.

You can deceive us. Should we play some D&D? Yeah, let's do it. It's time. You see the form of this formidable barbarian, just wearing some like animal furs and his face and chest are daubed with this blue paint looking suspiciously

down the corridor towards you and then you watch as he approaches the edge too close. He puts a foot wrong and then all of a sudden he tumbles down the ledge who's acting first.

The minute he hits the bottom red lets his arrow fly. Okay, roll the hit. Natural 20. Whoa, way. Yes, way. Holy crap And also

because it's I have advantage on creatures that haven't acted yet I got no joke two natural 20s I demand I'm taking a picture right now I stand oh my god

Yeah that's going to be 35 damage Holy shit Damn and uh Whoa Good good first volley red Doren

All right That's gonna be a 21 one to hit. Hey, nice. And doing 13 points of slashing damage. Nice. Excellent. Yeah, Doren slices off a big chunk of flesh

from this guy's upper thigh as he hits the ground. With a flick of Dizan's wand, a firebolt launches across the room towards this barbarian with a 27 to hit for 15 fire damage. Amazing. Mari. She pulls the bolt from her coat and hurls it towards this guy who just looks already scorched. messed up and that is a 21 to hit absolutely and she does 13 points of damage i mean between the

four of you this man is pierced sliced sliced burned and radianted to death congratulations we get advantage on his ashes if we attack again if you choose to do so yes i love that it's all happening under the shroud of past without trace too like the sounds are muffled as we try to you know Mm, that's true. Let's do it again. Same thing, everyone ready up. Agreed. Great teamwork. Drop a bigger bow to this time.

Get the attention of the other one. Yeah. Jack scrambles up to the edge of the step again. It gets like a fist-sized rock this time and takes it as high in the air as he can, drops it to the ground, and moves to the back of the cavern, getting his firebolt ready to fly.

And again, Red readies his bow. Mari moves closer this time, sort of next to Doran, and she takes her walking stick and spins it once, and blue light shifts through all the carvings. So now it's a magical Shalili. You really like blue. Doran watches you do this, and he's like, looks at his own, own axe, and he's like, kind of spins it in his hand, nothing, no lights or anything, and he's like, huh. And Red sees this, and he casts minor illusion on Ork Splitter just a little bit to give you a little yellow glow on it. And it's clear that you know it's not normal and you look up at red

and he kind of winks and he's like you deserve it too buddy I'm like just a big smiley face on the blade of the axe that winks Murray does like a little like weapon bump like a fist bump like hey man cheers splitter splits your shillali in half oh shit and then like screams so loudly about it we hear a larger commotion as this bigger rock falls from the ceiling and again nothing for a second and then you hear footsteps accompanied by a female voice just talking to herself a little bit and just like the previous one she approaches

this ledge she's looking out down the hallway trying to figure out where what's what's happening and and that's when her foot passes through this elusory. to rain and I rolled a natural 20 on her dexterity save oh no yeah sorry guys so she um holds on to the ledge she flies away yeah she takes to the air um I kind of imagine like Monty Python like cut paste and it moves you know like it's not like movement it's like clearly yeah no so she she trips and fall but catches herself at the last second and she's holding on

by a hand and looking down. No! Yeah, I don't think that's going to trigger your action or you're ready to action red because she didn't hit the ground. Damn it. So let's roll for initiative, everyone. Okay, Mari, what did you get?

I rolled a really good five. Hey, excellent. That's a number. Jack, what did you get? I got a 22. Hey! Dorn, what'd you get? I also got a 22.

Did you want to go before or after Alex? Doren can definitely go first. Red? I got a 21. Nice. And Kieran? 10. All right, Doren.

It's your turn. Top of the order. We've got this barbarian dangling from the ledge in front of you. What do you do? Doran's going to attack their feet, hoping to chop off their feet. Hoping to chop off their feet. Slice and dice. That's going to, oh my God.

Natural one. Oh, no. Oh, no. All right, so I miss and my axe clanks against the wall, but my second attack is a 26 to hit. Hey, that's a good number. Doing 15 points of damage. Excellent.

So the next, I chop. off maybe a foot or some toes my Achilles All right Jack I point to Zon's wand at this barbarian And fling a fire bolt And get a natural 20 What is going on

You do not get those off is happening It's not real swingy today 21 fire damage as I try to light this lady up Excellent all right Red It's your turn I got a 23 to hit doing 21 damage. All right. And I will attack again, trying to pin her head to the wall.

Stick around for a while. And he lets an arrow go with a 28. Uh-huh. Doing 32 damage. Yeah, Red. You absolutely skewer this woman, and her corpse is just pinned to the cave wall here. She's suddenly poisoned by the rusty arrowhead. and tetanus and all of a sudden she dies.

Mm-hmm. Well, it was like 32 damage to her hand. Like, I was just like, you're like, how? No, I said head. Oh, head. Oh, no, I did say him the first time. You're right. Yeah, that's right.

Yeah. They're like, ah! But she is not alone in this cave, and you hear the running steps of another warrior. He leaps down off of the ledge, brandishing a great axe, and runs to attack you, Jack Page, recklessly,

with a 17 to hit. I would hit me, but in the last moment, a shield of force appears and turns the axe of side. Twong! Nice. That's the sound of an axe on a shield.

Twong. Well done. I mean, you're the sound effects guy. Yeah. And because of this reckless attack, you will all have advantage on your attack rolls against this character for the next round.

Nice. Oh. Kieran. Kieran, what do you want to do? Kieran's just going to dodge in their place. Excellent. Okay. Mari, it's your turn.

Mari takes her staff and she runs over to this barbarian. Come on, staff. Let's do this. I want a latte. And she swings it hard at this person's head. But it's got, also not only is it magic. It also has the thorn fabric on it. Oh, yeah.

So it's magical and it's sharp. So she, that is a 19 to hit. Yes. And she does 16 points of damage. Nice. Franks, I think so. Five points of bleed damage as well. Wow.

Thanks to those thorns. Letter bleed. So that means they're going to bleed for the next couple of rounds? If they last that long. Yeah, I think it's 1D6 damage. every round. Yeah, it is. Doran, top of the round.

What do you do? Yeah, so Doran's, you know, this guy's standing basically right in front of him. Yeah, he's got an axe, you have an axe. Yeah, we're like, axe enemies. There's a better clip there. No. Doran's going to attack with advantage.

It's going to be a 23 to hit. Yes. Hey. Doing 14 points of damage, slashing. And then a natural 20. Hey! Whoa, which, oh my God, could I roll any worse?

That's going to be eight points of damage. Okay. It's a bad crit. Jack, Jack Page. Well, this barbarian's far too close for comfort, and so I'm going to... What's comfort? Comfort? Listen, I...

Angled her comforting. So Jack calls himself. I've decided this barbarian is comfort, and they're too close for comfort, and so I'm going to try and fling comfort across the room. with all the strength of my mind. The biggest telekinetic shove I can right to center of mass to try and get them away from me. If they could make me a strength saving throw, please.

Absolutely. Get out of here, Compert. That's a nine. A nine is going to push them back five feet and give me a little bit of breathing room. And then with a flick of the wrist, Desawn's wand throws a firebolt their way with a 20 to hit. Hey, absolutely.

Take that nice. Comfort for a big three fire damage as I skirt the wall. trying to get some space. You threw a hot water bottle at him. Yeah. I mean, I singed those furs. He's lightly toasted. Take that compadink.

He's got a sunburn. Red, your turn. I rolled two natural ones. Oh, my God. No, word of a lie. Shame. Shame, shame, shame, shame, shame, shame, shame, shame, shame, shame, shame, shame. Get out of him.

Throw him in the job. Wow. So I roll two natural 20s previous and two natural ones. Already we've gotten through all the good rules. I think the majority of the roles that you guys have made this session have either been ones or 20s. It's very polarized. All right.

Anyway, for my second attack. That's going to be 23 to hit. Yes, you hit. Nice. Doing, oh, 28 damage. Hey. Red, what does it look like when you kill this guy? I pin this guy to the body still pinned to the wall.

The arrow flies through this guy's hand As he's holding up his great axe Pins his wrist to the leg of the woman And he just dies there hanging It's almost like you're making artwork here Redd You hear the sound of running footsteps from above And some low voices

Talking to each other in a language That you do not speak What are they saying? Kieran, it's your turn Kieran's gonna run back to join Jack And try and hide somewhere in the shadows Stop hiding behind me Mari.

You can't really see them yet, so she's going to just stand over by Doran to be ready when these guys come down to give them a bonk with the Shalili. She'd make it sound so deadly. Bong! Bong! A deadly bong! Give them a little bong. Give them a little... Bunk.

A little smackeroo when they come down. Blood and thorns. I also love the idea that the creature that's dead but still wounded is still bleeding, just... Oh, yeah, yeah, that thing that when she hit it with the... thorn cloth. It just sprayed blood everywhere. So like, but she's just got like this like smear of it across her face. It looks good on you. You fool. It only makes me look cooler. Okay. So Mari, you are at the bottom of this ledge and you ready an action. Yeah. So that if someone else hops down or falls down, you're going to whack the shit out of them. Excellent. Doran,

your turn. Doran's, uh, I guess just waiting. So doesn't make any sense. to do much other than ready in action as well. Okay. So if someone jumps down... Does it sound like they're coming close to the edge? Are they just... Are they stopping there? Does it seem...

You can roll a perception check, I guess? I'll do that. I'll do that. I want to know if they're going to come down the ledge or if they've been warned enough to stay back and if we should go up and meet them. That's going to be a nine. Probably not very much.

I mean, you heard footsteps approaching. It's impossible. You can't echo locate, unfortunately. No. It's not one of your Dwarven abilities, so you don't know. Okay, I don't really know. Then I'm going to stay and ready in action at the bottom of this ledge. Cool.

Jack. I'm also going to sort of hug the wall and ready in action for if one falls through this illusion or sort of gets there, I'm going to launch another firebolt at him. Excellent. Firebolt, fireball. Red. Red walks up to the bottom of the ledge and sort of just perceives them a little bit back and above. and he reaches into the bag of holding and he pulls out ball bearings that he grabbed a long time ago and he spreads them all at the bottom of the ledge and he winks to Doren we're going to home alone

this great and then he heads back um does it tell you how what the area is of the ball bearings it's a 10 foot square and then red heads back to his position and while he can't ready in action he smiles and laughs jack did you see what I did I saw. They're going to fall on the pubs. Whatever. Mari, she gives them a thumbs up.

Thanks, Mary. She's like, I'm into this. She likes a good little moment of slapstick, because she's got her slap and stick with her. Okay. You better fucking make them jump on those ball bearings. There's no reason they wouldn't. Well, if they don't jump on the ball bearings,

they're landing on Doran. It turns out they have wingsuits, and they are going to sail over them. These are the smartest barbarians out of five for no reason. Yeah, it's actually the Red Bull tribe. It's not the Blue Bear Tribe. They're ready to fly. Oh, my God, they made a flying contraption.

Oh, no. I just got that. Yeah. I was like, what? And it gives them wings. It's an old commercial, admittedly. So this barbarian approaches the illusory ledge and perceives the gore on the ground underneath and sees me.

Mari waiting there with her staff upraised. And missing Doren entirely because he has got his back against the ledge hiding under this illusion, figures, I can take this blue lady. She says in primordial is like, hey, I'm lost directions. Great. Which sounds to a barbarian's ear like a desperate threat. Now to mention the smoldering corpses, right? There's a lot going on down here.

This was like this when I found them. Right, right. So they're all pinned to the wall. It's a very discreet pile of gore. I mean, yeah. He brandishes his weapon and hops down at me, Mari, ready to cleave you in Twain. when his feet come into contact with the ball bearings left behind by red. Like red like bends down and does the Kevin McAllister like fist bump.

He's like, yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. What happens to a creature that lands on ball bearings? Must succeed on a DC10 dexterity saving throw or fall prone. It's not even really hard. I rolled a natural one. This guy is a second barbarian. He like does like the like whoopo poop, poop, poop.

I was just about to say that. Alex is alike. I guess we could shame it, but I don't feel bad. Isn't the thing. Awesome. And then he like lands on his butt and farts as well. And bells ring. Ball bearings go up his butt.

So he falls prone. And Doran's like, uh, hello. Which triggers Doran's ready to action. Doran does the Kevin McAllister. Hello. Because he's prone. You get advantage to attack.

There's a spider crawling across his chest. An iron falls on his face. Doran brings his axe down onto the... I rolled the exact same thing on both dice at 10. So that's a 20 to hit. Yes. And a natural 20. They're doing eight points of slashing damage.

That's my ready-ed action, so I don't get to attack again. That's right. And Mari, I believe you ready to an action. Would you like to resolve that? Yes, that's a 25 to hit. Nice. So she rears back, and she's like, I was just asking for directions.

And 13 points of damage, total. Three of those are bleeding damage. Nice. So she just cracks that thing down there, right in the guy's nose. Like, so his nose starts bleeding. Lely. Jack, you also readied your action?

I did, yeah. 21 to hit with a firebolt for nine fire damage. As I like to bugger up. Okay. Unfortunately, this guy does not have the sufficient movement to stand up. So he's just going to slash out at your legs, Mari, from a prone position.

Slash out. Say she, chickie. Slash out. He cut Marie. Slash out. 16 to hit. He cut her feet. All right.

First blood on the heroes. God, finally. That's a massive five slashing damage. You get those ankles. I do. And Mari's down. Yeah, and she's bleeding out. Oh, my God.

This is what happens when you come in with a level one character on this party. Why did you put me in here? We should have leveled you up. Yeah, no. You had 40 episodes. What's taken so long? It's worth it. You're not a level one, are you?

No. I was like, what? Hold on. Three seasoned adventures and a baby. It's a new TV show I'd watch that I would too Yeah same

As long as young Tom Selleck is in it Sure Oh of course Kieran does Kieran want to hide Some more Kieran's gonna continue to hide Behind Redd Thanks for helping Kieran

As he should Can he at least help me If he's just right behind me anyway Yeah he couldn't help you attack this guy He'd have to be up there But he can like give you moral support I'll take it Yeah do it

Give me moral support Kieran Jack recognizes that the more stuff He does with Kieran More likely Kieran's going to get killed? Yes. I'm saving Kieran to get killed later versus getting killed now. Like it's inevitable.

At some point Joe will be just like, I need to kick a puppy and it's going to happen. Wait until I'm frustrated enough or else I won't get the catharsis I need. Yeah, exactly. I love the idea of that. It's like, and the barbarian dies. And with his falling body, the cave shakes ever so slightly and a stalactite falls on Kira.

Killing the dog. It's like, cruel and unusual. With my last breath, I curse Kieran. God, I'm so torn between walking away and just continuing to beat this guy with a stick. Beat him because if you walk away, he's going to get an attack. I know, stupid disengaging. Yeah, Murray's feeling. Oh, I got a Nat 20.

No. How? I don't know. Nice. This is statistically improbable. Love it. Mari, how much damage do you deal to this poor, innocent barbarian? 24 points of damage.

Whoa. Yeah, she'll just absolutely cranks this guy across the face. Doran, you have this bloody barbarian at your feet. Yeah. Mari just cracked his head in. Yeah. What do you do? Doran's like looking down after watching everybody kind of attack this character.

And he goes, are you still not dead yet? Doran's going to attack with a 23 to hit. Nice. Doing 10 points of damage. What does it look like when you kill him, Doran? Oh. I chop his head off. Clean.

Whoa, head? Yeah, yeah, head. Off? Off. Clean? Clean off. Doran chops the head clean off. And then he looks down on him and he says,

that's for carrying around the Dwarven head on your belt. Nice. That's not this. guy, Doran, but I think the message is clear. And then he kicks it like a soccer ball off the ledge. Whoa. Yikes. No, no, that's too far.

Go pick it up, Doran. Put it back on. Do you want to do anything else? Doran, is there another? Yeah, so Doran looks, listens up, puts his ear up to the ledge, and he's going to try and perceive if there's any others coming. It's going to be an unnatural 20. You don't hear anyone else in the room.

Sounds pretty quiet up there, he says. Oh, there's only four bodies and there were five when I saw, right, Mari? Yeah, there were five up there. Unless one of them, there's no way that other one's still sleeping. Doran's looking around and he kind of counts the four and he hears what Red says. And so he climbs up the ledge. So climbing takes you double movement, right? So that's 20 feet of movement for you to climb up that ledge.

Yep. And then he moves into the room by 10 feet and looks around. I don't see anybody up here. Was there any exits from in here? There's exits, but the only way to get through there is to go through the rooms of the stone giants. Oh, well, we better get moving in before he alerts somebody else. Agreed, Red says. Jack, it's your turn.

Yeah, Jack pops Kieran into a pocket dimension and moves up to take a look at these smoldering corpses to see if there's anything that might be handy to grab on our way up and past them because he doesn't have an improvement to get up this wall. Smart. They're all carrying great axes. of varying quality. One of them has two spears that look very sharp. Apart from that, there's some personal effects. Nothing very interesting for a layperson, but for Jack, it's a treasure trove.

Yeah, Jack might scoop up the personal effects into his bag, although the weapons are less interesting to him. Cool. Okay, Jack, so you move up and you search a dude. Yeah. Red, it's your turn. Red runs past Jack and skis. amp us up the wall.

Using all of his movement, he gets as far into the room past Doran as he can. And I'm going to do a perception. Do I see any sign of where the fifth person might have gone? Yeah, Red, actually, you do spot him. You see the back of this barbarian as he's running into the room with the mud. Red pulls out an arrow and fires at him. Ooh, rolled a hit. You got this.

No, no, he don't. Yeah, you do. Got it. Don't say natural 20. Big numbers, big numbers. Get it. I want the barbarian to give me a charisma saving throw. Oh.

I'm not very charismatic. 17. 17? Yeah. I rolled. What? It rolled pretty good. They're not very charismatic folks.

This guy's the stand-of-comedian. But this guy's got it. I was going to say, that seems like, I'm the cut up at the office. Literally because I cut up people But also because I'm funny I get a lot of laughs around the blood cooler I get a lot of laughs around the mud bath Damn it

Well that was a waste of a special arrow But that's okay That's how it works Red misses the first arrow And then he pulls one out and fires again And that's going to be a 25 to hit Nice Yes

Nice hit 23 damage Excellent Yeah he takes the arrow to his thigh He's getting away. Come on. Red, you watch as the barbarian limps but keeps running. Mari, what do you do?

She scampers up the ledge, but I think that's basically all I can do. Yay, not just me. I figured you would. Just get up the hill. Great. Mari, you scamper up the ledge. Doran, what do you do?

Doran's going to use twice's movement and dash and get up. Close to the entrance of the next cavern. You do the thing that all toddlers do, and directly in the way. Well. But he's short, though. You can shoot over him at least.

Whenever we watch TV with Henry, he immediately stands right in front of me. Come on, man. Trying to watch my stories here. Jack, your turn. You are left alone at the bottom of this ledge. Struggling with these noodle arms, I pull my way up this cliff

just to get, like, standing beside Mari and just kind of panting, looking around. What are you all doing, guys? Mari kind of helps them up, but they're both, they're both just like, oh my God, I'm not designed to climb. Not seeing anything else to do, he's going to sort of make the rest of his movement towards Red and Doran. All right, Red's turn. Red pulls out his bow and fires at the back of this guy as he's running away.

Get him. Oh, that's a 25 to hit. Nice. No problem. Vent a sink. Thanks, Doran. Do you know Doran speaks French? Pard de problem.

27 damage. And I'm going to attack again With a much 12 to hit No, you miss Oh, damn it It's this dude's turn He's going to run for his life

And you run You run so far away Yeah, skirting the pool of mud This dude runs his full 60 feet He's about 20 feet away from the first ledge that's going to lead him out of the room

into the sunlight. Mari. So Mari's going to, she's going to run in and then I'm going to use guiding bolts to try to hit this guy to see if I can stop him. Nice. Excellent decision. Cool. That's a 28 to hit. Oh,

excellent. Blanking it. Yeah. Doing 150 damage. Whoa. Just evaporating this guy. I wish. 12 points of radiant damage. Nice. Beautiful.

It's a sunburn for you. Yeah, and now he's very shiny. Doren, what do you do? Doren takes out his crossbow and fires at the barbarian. Get him, Doren. Oh, a 10? A 10 to hit? No, you miss.

Damn. Doren is going to use his commander's strike. He yells to Red. Red. I am terrible. You take your shot. You're not terrible. What a fucking adventure.

Don't worry about it. How do you use these things? All right, I'll do it, though. How much damage am I adding if I hit? Uh, six. Whoa, that's nice. Ooh, 26 to hit. Mm-hmm.

Hey. 34 damage. Whoa. Yeah, this retreating figure is backlit by daylight, and he takes a few more steps. He's almost there, and Red pegs him right in the back. and he goes down Go to sleep

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Cecil Lee Wilson Jerry Rose Anderson Christopher Colin Burkhart, Crow, Casey, D.S. Dippity, Elizabeth H, Haley, Harper the Marks, Heather Nichols, Indian Thrifty, Jekyll, J.D., Joy Robinson, Jory, K.R., KM, Cade, Kirsten Wolf, Lizania, Last Ruth on the left, Leader J, Lizzie Demon, Lorelei, Loon, Matilda Rushing, Melinda Curley, Moon, Melissa, Merlin, Sam C, Reagan, Wren, Ruth Ann Reed, Scotty, S. Ray 96, Tony Pepperoni, Zander Morning Dove, and Zach House. Woo! All of your dice, you'll roll them twice and add your modifier. So you want to roll natural just like a bad girl

But a little problem is hanging around in your head Roll a 20 and you're creating now your mind is a whole world It's filled with numbers, stats and figures and the things that you read So, all of your dice, you roll it twice, and add your modifier, uh-uh, all of your dice, you roll it twice, and add your modifier, uh-uh, and when you can't remember the way that you roll, remember this song instead. All of your dice, you'll roll twice and add your modifier, uh, uh.