Dice Shame - 28 | 'Double Take'

Episode Date: April 23, 2020

The party sees double as they take on a mysterious monster in the dark forest... Comedy, action and a whole lot of shaming come together in Dice Shame, an Actual Play Podcast of Storm King's Thunder by Wizards of the Coast! Join our GM Jo; her partner Harlan, his brother Alex & their best friends Justin and Rob as they tackle the daunting world of Faerun in this legendary adventure module! Dice Shame is a podcast that welcomes its audience to the gaming table. Like the games they play at home, they try not to take themselves too seriously. The show aims to be entertaining, inclusive, and irreverent, while still taking the rules (somewhat) seriously. Join us every Thursday morning for brand new episodes available on all major platforms including; Spotify, iTunes, Google Play and more! If you haven't checked it out yet... what are you waiting for?!? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jack's back? We just took on a stone giant! I want the, I want the, like, top five Harlan Giant rundown. That's your third max damage roll? What is this? Is this an ogre? Dorn is nothing if not, not creative. It explodes. Jack's first thought is, what the hell are these things?

Thanks, Jack. Yellow dice, black numbers, you are on blast. They can see you coming. Don't even try. It's on you, Doren. And that bastard. Get out of here, you double-headed beast. Welcome back to Dice Shame, Episode 28, Double Take. MVP this week is Katie Orrett.

I got to play at End of the World with Katie during Invictuscon last month, and she's been hanging out with us on Discord ever since. Katie, you rule. Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, Dice Shame has started recording remotely, both for our safety and the safety of those we love. Please be mindful during these times. by staying home whenever possible, making minimal trips to the store

and doing your part to prevent the spread of this terrible virus. I'd also like to take a moment and thank those in the essential services, such as our amazing GM herself, for putting themselves at risk during this time. We love you, stay safe. Isolation is hard,

but if you're listening to us right now, I want you to know that we care about you. All right, are we ready? Let's roll some dice. Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to welcome Jack back to the party. Hey. Welcome back.

Arriving, kicking, would you believe it? Chicken, I don't know. Well, welcome back, Jack. Three weeks is too long to not have Rob's dulls at tones in our ears. Yeah, it was too long. That was tough. Yeah. But here I am.

Back again from the dead. The stakes are high, guys. I'm not fucking around either. These giants are formidable enemies, and you're going to have to use all of your resources and wits to stay alive, I promise. you. Yeah, I mean, Doran got thrown 60 feet.

It took 20 damage. Yeah. And that was just one of its actions. Yeah, he went down. I went down. Yeah. Don't fuck with giants. Don't fuck with giants.

Or do. Or do fuck with giants. Yeah, it's kind of the whole point of this campaign. We're stuck. We can all fuck with a giant, I think. At a time. Yeah. All of us against one.

I agree. Additionally, I think there must be a hierarchy, as all father says. But I think stone giants are probably high above hill giants at the very least. I bet we could order them. if we really tried. Let's do it. Let's bring out our job. Okay, we could do that.

No, but you know what I mean? Like, in my mind right now, just from fighting them, hill giants are on the bottom, stone giants are above them. So, in that you like hill giants less than stone giants or that they're just tougher? This is the way... I want the, like, top five Harlan Giant rundown. No, this is red like a stone giant is much tougher than a hill giant because their skin was tougher.

They had the ability to melt through stone. Additionally, though we haven't encountered one, I think fire giants are above them because they were covered in plate mail. So, I mean, maybe, but also just digging in the dirt, this guy's fingernail fell off. But it doesn't speak to the most robust. Sure. You know what?

And in my limited D&D time, I'm putting things together too. I'm seeing hill giants on the bottom, cloud giants up there, based on Zephros's intellectual degree. Yeah, yeah. I see that as, you must be pretty far up there if you're that, like, wise and intelligent, versus some of these hill giants or fire giants that are digging in the mud.

So are we just going around like reviewing giants, like auditing? Four or five stars. So yeah. We're going to see your number of kills per year. No, I love it. Stone giants, three stars. Would kill again.

We're going to be taking away some toughies. Tuffies. Formidable. Yes. Formidable. So you are. all standing in the bottom of a crevasse, and Jack

has just recently come back to consciousness. Jack! And Red throws his arms around Jack, and wants to kiss him, but he's not going. He's like, oh, thank you. We thought we lost you. And I think Jack freezes. He's, like, please.

And they're like trying to push you away. Not trying to push you away, but just like, everything is... You've been like suffocating. Yeah, everything is so claustrophobic. Yeah. Oh, for sure. Please. And Redd, like, fights the impulse but pushes himself away. And I think, like, Jack almost scoots across the ground for a minute, just so that there's, like, an arm's length around him. Where, where are we?

Well, we're in a crevasse. What's the last thing you remember? So we were on the road, and there were stone giants. Everything gets a little bit fuzzy. There was this giant, and she grabbed me, and I just, everything started flashing before my eyes. And then there was this pressure. It was just immense.

It was so... And then I don't remember much. I picture Jack kind of like Han Solo at this point in the sense that your eyes are still... I can't see. Yeah, you're like sweating profusely and your eyes are getting used to even the dim light. I think it's nighttime now.

It is nighttime. It's about midnight. Kraylov's got his goggles on. You were petrified. You... She reached out and grabbed you and turned you to stone. Then she melded you into her arm and we hunted you down and got your back, buddy. Yeah, and the...

Rob, did Jack experience anything during the time that he was melded? Crushing pressure was the first thing. And then almost like a moment of life flashing before your eyes. And then that's almost in that transitional moment of becoming stone. And then it was this unable to move, like conscious in a tight space that just all around you, this stone that's come in. and wrapped around every piece of view. And then it was just quiet and impossibly heavy.

And I think there's some part of him that's not sure what he's felt. I think that there's some of those memories were definitely taking him back to like all of these old digs he was on or all of these other pieces. And there was a flash of he once did this dig of a stone giant temple was on the other side of the world. It was stone giants from another place from more than a century ago, but there was this prayer that was on the wall that he couldn't stop thinking about while he was there.

I, I, Yelanis, may our crust be hewn from stone, but leave our hearts soft. And just that, like, phrase of this prayer to a giant god from a culture he doesn't really understand or know all of was this echoing piece through his head while he was turned to stone. And then the darkness cleared, and you're here with your friends. Well, I was so glad you're back. We got to do a little bit of dungeon delving as well. Doran took pictures for you. Yes.

I had to act as the map maker while you were petrified. And let me tell you, I'm very thankful to have you back, Jack. What day is it? Markenaw 13, going into 14. Look, we're all a bit shaken. We've also taken some damage ourselves. I think we should make camp, maybe right here in this crevasse, rest up a little bit, and gather our wits about us in the morning.

Can we not stay down here? It's just the walls. Yes. Of course. If we can't atop the crevasse, we'll be fine. Just somewhere with a little space. I'm also feeling quite drained myself. Something that that ghost did to me.

You haven't been looking well since... No. Yeah, it feels like some of my vitality's been siphoned. Kral! I like push Jack's face out of the way. Are you okay? I think I'll be okay. Just need a good night's sleep and a lot of coffee.

You and me both. I was thrown by a giant, Jack. Looking around now that Jack's had a moment to have his eyes clear, I know we're in a crevasse, what else am I seeing? Yeah, what does it look like? It is dark in here, but what starlight reveals is that there is a large corpse of a stone giant. Maybe part of her is broken off. So there's still like flesh and bone.

Yeah, stony flesh, stony bone. Yeah, so we want to go up and kill. camp. Should we check the body first just before we head up? Is there anything on it? There are still strange rocky protrusions from her flesh indicating her powers when she was alive. She was able to touch things and put them on her body, absorb them. So there's, I think I said there was an anchor that you can make out like the form. I don't think that you see any other humanoids. Can I do a perception just to see if there's any valuable things that are maybe stuck into your body? I might even do you one better.

I roll the four, that's no good. Can I roll a stone cunning? Please. Because this, I think, applies here, and it's whenever I look at stonework. Fucking natural one. Oh, no. Which it relates into, but I add double my proficiency, so that's like a seven. So early.

Still going to shame you. Oh, my goodness. Oh, boy. Poor shame. What did I name it? Deishama. Dishima. Anybody else want to take a look at these giants, see if there's anything of value on her?

I think Jack would like to stand up and just investigate the giant a little bit. Try and figure out, does she have any possessions? Is there any indication of what her deal is, why she was here, what she was doing? Okay. Try and just get a sense of what. As you investigate the corpse of this stone giant, you identify further objects that she is absorbed into her body. Okay. You see an old tombstone that seems to have been melded to part of her shoulder blade.

And there is actually, after some further investigation, another humanoid. That's what I was looking for. Around the rib cage area on her left side, you see the body of an elf. Should we chip them out? So before we do that, are there any dates on the tombstone? Is it clear? Is it an elf tombstone? Is it a dwarf tombstone?

Is it a human tombstone? Is there anything like that? Why don't you roll a history check? I would love to. 16. You recognize from the style of the tombstone that this is probably dwarven, but because the tombstone is not face up, there is no inscription on it. Perfect.

Did you see this door, and there's a dwarven tombstone here? Oh, my God. And there's a person right next to it. An elf, it looks like. I didn't see that before. I was looking at the body to see if I recognized anything. This is a dwarven tombstone. speculate this came from South Crypt.

As fascinating as all this stuff is, I'm feeling quite hungry. I'm going to go... I love Kralath so much. Camp with Oren, get set up, and I'll meet you guys up there. That sounds like a great idea. I'll see you in a bit, Oren.

Jack, it's good to have you back, buddy. Yeah, thank you. And Jack takes a minute to step back. He realizes he's, like, throwing himself into work to distract himself from all of the, like, claustrophobic was just turned to stone. trying to understand what that's like and where it's from. And, like, he's, there's, there's an element of him wanting to get lost in,

in something technical and pedantic in, you know, that, that overrides, because that's where he feels safest. I'm going to be looking at this elf person. Did you want to roll a medicine check? Please. Ten. They're not breathing. They're not breathing.

Come on. And I start giving mouth to mouth to the stone. Your whiskers get in the way. I guess we don't have greater restoration anymore, though. No, that's a one-time use. Jack looks at the elf almost more like it's a carving or a representation of a person than an actual one. Just trying to figure out, hey, the clothes they're wearing, are they modern elf clothes? Are they ancient elf clothes?

Would you even be able to tell the difference because their styles changed so slowly over time? Just trying to figure out, like, is this a person that got trapped in there yesterday? Is this a person that this Stone Giant fought 100 years ago? and it's been carrying around forever. Just trying to get a sense of... Really good question. This is why we need you here, Rob. This is exactly the type of stuff.

You could roll investigation or history. Let's do history. 13. The clothes look fairly modern. Fairly modern. Can I try to chisel him out? I'm just picturing us using Greater Restoration finally on him. It just him being like,

he like goes back from stone. He's just covered in blood from... Oh, man. Well, that's it. So if you want to try to try to... to remove this creature from this like form from the stone giant, you will make a strength check for me as well as a slight of hand check for me. Where in the stone giant is it again? I told you it was her left rib. I want to do, I guess, more an investigation as to how likely

it is that we'd be able to chisel out enough around the body as to not damage the person. You can roll with advantage on this investigation check. Oh, a three and a four. That's really Shise. So that's going to be a 10, just to investigate. It would be very difficult to estimate where you would be able to dig or excavate safely. Doran, even if we cut off a big enough chunk of rock, trying to hoist it out this crevasse, we don't have the equipment for that. It's going to be really heavy.

Let's mark it on the map. Yeah. And when we have the power to free this person, I don't really know how long I spent there. it was not a great experience, but it also was a little timeless. They're not going anywhere. That's true. We did wait three episodes to get you back. Mark it as a side quest.

This stone giant that we're looking at the corpse of, is there anything on her body that suggests a place in society that we, that would suggest to Jack a name he would write down other than just stone giant? Your experience would probably serve you well in order to try to classify this giant. Make up a name. Why don't we call her a stone giant petrifier? I think I'd like to roll information on stone giants

now that I have fought and killed one. Okay. I'm just going to roll to see if I can also determine anything about how stone giants function that will benefit us. That is a 22. Red with a 22. It occurs to you after investigating this stone giants corpse that it would be very common for stone giants to have communities that live underground, much like dwarves do. They would value living in and amongst their favored terrain, essentially, in rocky caverns, and that it may be disorienting for them or strange to be on the surface.

Interesting. So Red looks over the stone giant and as Jack is scribbling notes about its type and Dorn is starting to clamber back up to where Kralath is, he turns to Jack and says, you know, looking at this creature and the way it sort of functions and the way we fought it, I think maybe the stone giants might spend most of the time underground.

I wouldn't be surprised if part of the reason we were so successful in tackling it this time was because it was out in the open. Even though it's dark, something about it seems like they prefer underground. There's almost like color draining from Jack's face as he stops to think about, okay, being underground versus, yeah, I bet that feels very different for them. Maybe we're done here.

All right, let's climb up and eat some of Kralath's cooking. So we climb up. I think we enjoy some dinner by Kralath. Yeah, and speaking of that, I find some apples and feed the horses and stuff. And just as an experiment, can I try Sacred Flame? On the horses? On the apples. Like, could I, like, put them together and, like, mix in some of the, like, lembous bread and, like, a little bit of sugar?

What kind of damage does Sacred Flame do? Is it radiant damage? It's radiant. So it doesn't really cook them so much as just make them really radiant. Right. shine a nice spotlight on it and it gets toasty. Perfect. Well, I mean, we come back to the campsite, smells like apples.

I'm thinking we camp and I'm really still excited to visit this dragon at Crip Garden Forest. I think we should speak to it. Excited. Well, look, Jack's back. We just took on a stone giant. Come on, this is good. And there are only three of us. I mean, we're glad that you're back.

But, guys, we are here to shape the reordening. we are the most powerful beings in this party for and we need to put some footprints as Dorn would say it towards our goal that's right footprints let's let's go to bed then and let's start early in the morning everybody's asleep for a second that that night and suddenly Jack is simultaneously claustrophobic from this like magical bubble he knows is there and kind of lonely and like no I need to step out and go get Kieran for a minute I want I want my my companion back and spends an hour and everybody else is asleep

and you just wake up and Kieran is there sleeping on Jack's chest or something. Yeah, nice. So cute. So Marbonov the 14 is clear and cold. Puddles where rainwater had gathered are skinned with black ice and all the ground around you

is carpeted with yellow poplar leaves. You guys are waking up, doing your thing and getting ready to travel. As Red is packing up, the tent moving around. He's just going to be picking up particularly colorful yellow and red leaves and just storing them in the bag of holding. Just starting a collection. Just really like the brightest most colorful leaves that you can find. Yeah. Cute. So Jack, you're preparing your spells this morning. I am. Yeah. And a peculiar feeling comes over you. It's like pins and needles maybe all over

your body. All of your hair stands on end. That's very strange. Yeah, I think he's, He's going to freeze for a minute and just try and understand what's happening, just to, like, dive in there. Is this a, like, is this just pins and needles? He's, he's feeling a little numb. Is it, like, is he feeling sick? Is it? It's not a sickness so much as it is a feeling of being enervated. There is some kind of magical energy in your body that you did not have before today. And it's totally new. You're used to your magical powers coming from long. hours of study, memorizing gestures and learning lore. This is a feeling of magical power that is somehow innate to you. Interesting.

Would you like to roll Arcana? I would love to roll Arcana. Let's get rolling out on the field here and see where we're at. Rolling! 14. It occurs to you that your experience with the stone giant has maybe given you some kind of powerful energy. Ooh.

Yeah, I think he's going to digest that for a minute and not play around with it too much this morning, but definitely take a lot of notes about how it feels and how it relates to the other bit, maybe sort of mentally discussing it back and forth with Kieran as they're breaking camp. I think he's a little bit gun-shy to dive too deep into that in the moment. Cool. Yeah, and I think once we are all done our preparations, we map. mount up and start riding north towards Crypt Garden.

The sun is very low in the sky by the time you reach Cryptgarden forest. In the meadows around the woods, a low mist hugs the ground. The forest is dark and foreboding. Well, should we venture in the Crypt Garden at night, or should we make camp and head out in first light? I mean, I'm not afraid of the dark, but I know, Doran, you've mentioned a few times that the darkness makes you feel a bit spooky, right? I love the darkness. Well, I mean, Doran's just faking it. Let's, we might not want to.

Let's... Well, I mean, as long as Kralath can see, I mean, that's pretty much our biggest limitation to... We didn't tell you. Look at these. Whoa. Yeah, I got some goggles in that crypt there. That's right, and look.

And I, like, pulled Doran's Mithril armor up under his, like, leather to show you. This is Mithril armor. Wow. Yeah. If Krayloth can see in the dark red, it looks like we're ready to go a little further. Oh, and I got this. I turn around to show you the quiver on my back. Ah!

Yeah. Well, those are some fancy-looking arrows. What, arrows? Red knows their magic. You just don't care very much. That's right. That's fair. Yeah, they're cool, but look at the quiver!

Whoa, those are enchanted arrows, Red. Oh, I mean, they're pretty cool, yes. Are you leaving the horses? Oh, right. Oren, you stay here with the horses again, please? Yes, sir. And Jack, just get ready, because you weren't with us last time, but these waters are deep and murky.

If you see a moose o'er and you let us know. I'm going to try to pit it. Oh, God. Can I stay? Oh, fine. And yeah, I think we enter and start walking towards where we imagine the deepest, darkest part of the forest is. As you approach the forest, you begin to hear something in the woods. It sounds like voices accompanied by the now familiar thud and tremble

sound of huge footsteps. You're about 50 feet away from them, when two massive creatures emerge from the train. They stand a little shorter than the hill giants you'd vanquished earlier, and most notably, each creature has two heads. Each head sports long, tusk-like bottom teeth, small yellow eyes, and matted beards. The creatures stop arguing with each other and roar in the direction.

Roll for initiative. Ah. A natural one on Chester. Chester, come on. He's going back here. Why don't we start with Jack? 10. Krayloff?

Also 10. Oh, who wants to go first? Me? Sure. Red? Actually, because I roll with advantage, I'm a natural explorer, I have 19. Even though I didn't roll a natural one, I take the higher. Doran?

I've got a 15. So we're standing in some sparse forest here. You haven't quite walked into the forest. full density of cryptgarden, but there are a couple of trees around, and from behind one of these trees, two, two-headed creatures emerge. That's four heads! They see you, they recognize you, and they want to murder you. It's their turns.

So they're going to both charge toward you with their weapons raised, and they run directly at the party as they get within five feet of Red and Doran. But they are unable to act this turn. Red, it's your turn. Oof, I am going to disengage and I am going to use my feline agility to move double my movement, which means I'm going to move 60 feet back the way we came so that I have a good reach on these guys. Run away!

Red will! Run away! Run away! I'm dead! All right. Doran, these two monsters charge you and you will. look to your right and red is gone. What do you do? I kind of shrug, no bother. I lift my axe and I attack the, what is this? Is this an ogre? You don't really know. You've never

seen a creature like this before. It's a two-headed ogre-sized creature. I attack this two-headed beast with my pallid and die. Here we go, with a 22. Oh, yes. 22 to hit Oh my god adding full damage 14 14 damage All right noted

My axe My axe goes into his knee Under his knee cap He's like Owry And the other head's like Oh he also Oh and then I attack again

Okay And then I chop at the other leg And I hit with an 18 Yes you do And I do Another 14 damage Wow Wow

Oh, wow. Take out both his kneecaps. Shing, shing! Ah, my kneecaps. Kralath, it's your turn. All right, Kralath pulls out his mace and stomps across the mossy ground toward the big two-headed creature that Doren just hit. And he's going to try to smash it with the mace. Natural 20.

Oh! All right. That's awesome. You get to roll all of your dice twice. Nine points of damage. Well done. And then he's going to cast shield of faith on himself. Nice.

Plus two to AC. Cool. Jack, you see Doran take two brutal swipes with his axe and then Kralath join the fray. Jack's first thought is, what the hell are these things? And he's searching his memory for like two-headed ogre-looking, giant-y things, trying to like conjure any information he might know about them. Yeah, roll a nature? 13.

You've heard stories of Etten. This fits the bill. Jack sees these two Etons, these two-headed ogre creatures come out. It's Etton's. They've got two heads, which is the obvious thing. It's just what he said. It's Edens, they've got two heads each. These are literally all he knows about them, but that's, you know, it feels like it's the most important thing. I think Doran through labored breathing is like, thanks, Jack.

I think it's reasonable for Jack to make the long. logical leap that two heads means twice the awareness. Cool. They can see you coming. Don't even try. I mean, it's just this like his mind is firing. He's shouting what's coming to him. But he's also cooking on this spell in the back of his head.

It's a familiar one. He's bringing up these magic missiles from each of his fingertips. But he's given it a little bit of that alchemical casting, sort of empowering it with some force. Just this, you know, the shock of seeing these things is scaring the hell out of him. So he's adding some extra force damage to these darts. So he gets three of them, and we're going to go... The one that Dorn has kneecapped twice is getting the first dart. We could call it adrenaline that you're using.

Yeah, I mean, it's everything. That's eight damage to that one. Okay. The second dart's going to go to that one as well. 13 damage. And the third one is going to the one that's a little bit further back on the far side of Krala. The untouched Etton. The untouched Etton is about to be touched 16.

Wow, great stuff. Okay. And then Jack's going to move 30. feet south. Run away. Come on back to me, buddy. That's his move is run the fuck away. Start some shit.

Yeah. And Kieran's going to fly back with him. And so there's these powerful darts of force. They almost look inspired by Red's arrows now as they're leaving his fingertips. They're just these perfect shafts flying through the air. Whoa. Shaf! Whoa!

That's flash. I know. That's okay. I love it. And then, you know, when they hit, they disappear. But they're modeled after the way Red can bring down an ogre in one shot. That's sort of what he's... Listen to this, love.

I'm so smiling. It's the top of the round and the Etton's get to act. In one hand, a battle axe. In one hand, a morning star. Oh, my. Two heads, two ambidextrous animals. That's right. You think they'd go for some variety.

It's not very original. What he's got? So the eton that swipes at Doran misses both attacks. Doran is smaller than he was expecting. Am I able to do a reaction? You absolutely can. So I'm going to use my D8 to roll a superiority dye, which adds three to the damage. Cool.

And when a creature misses with a melee attack, it is my reaction to expend one and make a melee attack against that creature. so I do that. Doing another 22 to hit. Wow, yeah. Oh, 14, 17 damage. Nice. That's your third max damage role. Whoa.

Ladies and gentlemen, incredible. I was just saying before this episode started, how I was kind of disappointed that my roles weren't getting hits. Your axe sinks deep into the creature's thigh and it howls in pain. A flock of birds flies out of the tree next to you. Ah, I love it. to this guy. The eton that is menacing

Kralath moves another huge footstep closer to him. Boom, boom. And then swipes with both of his weapons. A 13 doesn't hit you? No. So he misses twice as well.

All right. Red, it's your turn. What do you do? I turn to Jack, who's 30 feet from me now, and I'm like, love your magic missiles, buddy. And then I'm going to say, do you think these creatures are magic? Not more than just having two heads. The only reason I'm asking this for the meta sense

is I want to know if I choose a magic arrow. Yeah, great. I think you can totally rely on Jack for that. And that's a no then. That's a no. And I'm going to attack with a sharpshooter disadvantage, the one by Doren. Okay, what's your to hit?

18 to hit? Yeah, buddy. That's going to be with Colossus Slayer. Dig it down. And sharpshooter, so you're adding plus 10. Yeah, really nice feet. And I roll double max damage. Oh, my God.

Maximum. Something about, oh. And these are not giants, correct? They're not classified as giants. They are. Then I add another four damage. 33 damage. Wow.

Wow, wow, wow. You hit the Etton square between one of the sets of eyes, and it wobbles on its feet, and then falls over dead. Yeah. I almost picture, like, the one head continuing to, like, lash out and talk and be like, ah, like, before it, like, fully dies. But then blood comes out of its mouth, too. Yeah. Wake up, Ronald.

Wake up. That's really sad, actually. Oh, it's got dark. Oh, boy. But, like, the visual for me is always the best thing. One head just goes out. The other one's like, like, bubbling blood from the mouth. Then what happens, Red?

I'm going to attack again. I'm also going to use. But this time I'm going to spend my bonus action because I'm within 90 feet to cast Hunter's mark on the other creature. Okay. Since I can only use Colossus Slayer once per round and I still want to do a little bit of extra damage. I will be rolling with a disadvantage again to see if I can sharpshoot this. Because Red's nothing if not a little extra. I am nothing to be a little extra.

Watch this! Yeah, that's going to be a 22 to hit. Yeah. 21 damage. Okay. Doren, it's your turn. Doren, um, runs over. over to the other Aten that is standing right next to Krayloth.

And I'm going to just, you know, take another swipe at its toe. Maybe I say something like, get out of here, you double-headed beast. Real creative. I'm just following a jack's footstuffs up. Dorn is nothing if not not creative. And 18. Straightforward. An 18 to hit.

Yeah, you hit. Doing with 12 damage. Okay, duly noted. You give him a bit of the nasty pedicure. And then, actually, I was thinking of his feet, too. And then I go to swipe again with a nine. You're thinking about his feet? That misses.

Nine misses. No, I was thinking, I want to swing at his toes. I don't know why. And then you said... Dioran's got a foot thing. Oh. He also likes goblins. Goblin feet.

I mean, what is an Eton foot, if not just a really big goblin foot? Krayloth, what do you do? Krayloff is going to mutter a prayer to Kellenvore and in the darkness that's now illuminated for him, he's going to cast sacred flame. So I make a dexterity save? That's right.

13. That is a save. It saves. It was just enough. Finally, finally my dice are working for me. I think you guys might vanquish these etton without taking a lick of damage. Jack,

it's your turn. Jack strafes a little bit to the east to get some cover by the trees and looks out at this eton and just squeezes his hand and tries to toll the dead. So if you can make me a wisdom save against 15. Not terribly wise. Oh, that's a natural 20. No. There's these wisps of necrotic energy that Jack tries to wrap around and pull through this eton, but it doesn't connect.

He takes a swipe at the necrotic energy as it approaches him. That's his action. That's its action. There's a reaction. And then what do you do? You just hang out. And so then he goes and gets his back behind this tree to the right of him just to to make sure he's got, you know, a little bit of cover or something.

Okay. So we have read way back in the darkness, then up ahead about 30 feet, Jack and Kieran both trying to secure themselves in this woody tree. Woody tree. I love it. And this treeish tree inside of Jack and Kieran are both sort of hiding in this tree. and right up in melee combat with the Eton, Doren and Kralov. It is the Etton's turn.

He's going to swing with his battle axe at Kralath. Motherfucker. That sounds good for me. That is a miss. And Morningstar at Kralath. God damn it. Shame, shame, shame, shame. I'm not so sad about it, but I understand why you might want to shame.

Was that a one or just really low? Three, and I haven't hit at all with any of my monsters yet this whole game. I'm just... All right. For shame. It's such a shame. Joe, it's such a shame. Thank you.

I feel for you. It's such a shame. Yellow dice, black numbers, you are on blast. The GM's a player too. It's fun for their dice to be nice. But not for... Not too nice. Yeah.

Red, you see this etton swiping ineffectually at Kralath. Affectionately at Krayloff. I'm going to roll with sharp shooter penalty, and I have Hunter's mark on this one still. Ooh, 16 a hit? That hits. Oh, man. 35 damage.

Oh. It looks like he's got about one hit point left. And I will fire, not with penalty. But 10? No, you miss. Oh, damn. It goes wide. It's on you, Doren, and that bastard.

Creatures bleeding from its nil. neck. And Doran winds up and takes a swipe and hits it with 12 damage. What does it look like when you kill this eton? Oh, my axe sinks straight into its stomach and its guts spill out all over the ground in front of me and it's like blah and the thing basically turns inside out. not like turns inside out but it's it kind of falls backwards content's under pressure little pieces fall through the woods like but what happens to your beard

it's grimy covered in viscera in fact it's like already covered in shit and then and then my face covered in blood I pull up my beard and wipe my face all right I think it's dead I say turning around let's keep going we gotta find this dragon Krayloff lowers his shield

and he's just got like a shield Like he's covered in gore like everywhere else. It just begins wiping it off. Yeah, good job, everybody. Great job, Doran. You're an MVP of this one. Thank you. Thank you.

We've got a dragon to find. Actually, and on that note, so we are seeing a dragon. We know that dragons like valuable things, i.e. magic items. We do have $100 worth of gemstones that we did find in the dungeon. So this is sort of what I was thinking we could use. However, when we were at South Crypt, we did notice that there were not many creatures around as well. maybe we want to bring some food for the thing if we want to scoop some of this meat into the bag

and dump it out in front of a dragon. We'd have to cut off like some nice chunks of meat. This dragon is brilliant. It's stupidly smart. If it was having trouble getting food, it would find a way. It's probably like it, these things are not. My thinking wasn't that it needs to feed.

More like, we killed something evil that was competing in your wilderness. Here it is if you want to feast on its bones. It's called gna bone. So Doran lutes the body. There's nothing of value. He reaches in and pulls out the heart. It's like cantaloupe sized.

Perfect. And he pulls it and it's kind of stuck. There's ten of this and stuff. He pulls out his dagger and just slices around it. And he says, here! And he tosses it to Red. Yeah, and Red like opens the bag of holding it falls right in over the like the really cherished gemstones and stuff. Just like knocks on a table in there.

And he's like, yeah, who knows? I mean, maybe Nambone wants a little bit of something to chew on while we talk. Or maybe he'll just appreciate we vanquished a two-headed at. Unless they worked for Nabone. I wouldn't mind giving them a quick look over just to see if there was anything like anything that we could tell about, do they have a relationship to anybody? Are they wearing any symbols? Are they, you know, were they clearly at home and just wandering through the woods and you're like, oh, there's food or like just trying to get a sense of what their context was before they. Yeah, one of them is wearing a shabby wool cloak.

Apart from that, they are largely unclothed. There's, they've got like underpants on sort of thing. I'd be curious if these etons have any place within the ordaining, such as they fall under hill giants or something like that. Obviously, they seem most like hill giants based on their smell. In fact, I know that hill giants have a very distinct smell. We've smelled them before. I have a great sense of smell.

Can I see if they're of a similar smell? Well, these are also of the giant subtypes, so you can definitely roll. Yeah, I'm going to roll for information. Ettenes. Two heads, four stars. 14. You would presume that these Ettenes probably occupy a space below hill giants in the ordaining. Something probably shared with ogres. They are, you know, smaller than hill giants, so probably less important in their society.

I share this with the team, and I say, and since dragons and giants have such a head-but history, I doubt that they were working for Norbone. I mean, the other point is they certainly used to have that place in the ordaining, who knows where they'll end up in the new order. True. But if we're debating the fact that Norbone might not like us appearing with the heart of one of these things, I would argue that since dragons and giants have such a torrid history,

she or he would be very happy that we vanquish some more giant subtypes in their forest. I think this is a good thing, Doran. I think this would be a great little piece of, hey, we come to speak and we have a heart. Cool. Yeah. And we continue moving towards where we'd imagine the deepest darkest part of the forest is, because

dragons always live in the deepest, darkest part of the forest. We all know this. It's a fair assumption. It is known. The autumn has done nothing to impede cryptgarden forest's oppressive and verdant beauty. As you begin to wade through the cold water between

the trees, you catch whiffs of acrid marsh gas. At times you're crashing between banks of rattling cat tails or taking a rest on top of a fallen log. You know when the camera is half submerged in water, and you see the water line across the lens. We see that, all bleary, murky green water on the lower half, and on the upper half, we see your party on one such fallen log. Your voice is

murmuring from a distance. The thing swims stealthily up to your party. From land, all we can see is this set of three protruding eyeballs with horizontal pupils half sunk in the dark water. Can everyone give me their passive perception, please? 16. 11. 13. 15. Cryloff and Red, as you are both sitting on the log, maybe ringing out some of your clothes and taking a rest, you notice these things, eyeballs,

and then you see tentacles raised dripping out of the water as they lash out at your party. Something stirring below the water. Oh boy, I hope it's not an alligator. Remember to join our Discord server and get into the fun. There's a community of shamers out there and ready to hang. See you soon. By the way, Harlan, I always love it when you make a song and you put it at the end of the episodes.

It always makes me so good. Those little Easter eggs. It's very cute. Thanks for that, by the way. Strong, Shaft. Can you dig it? They're the magic missiles that go flying through the air. Shaft! It's a complicated spell, but no one understands it but the wizard.

Shaft! Jack's Shaft!