Dice Shame - 30 | 'Water Under the Bridge'

Episode Date: May 7, 2020

The party speaks with the great Green Dragon and looks to what comes next... Comedy, action and a whole lot of shaming come together in Dice Shame, an Actual Play Podcast of Storm King's Thunder by Wizards of the Coast! Join our GM Jo; her partner Harlan, his brother Alex & their best friends Justin and Rob as they tackle the daunting world of Faerun in this legendary adventure module! Dice Shame is a podcast that welcomes its audience to the gaming table. Like the games they play at home, they try not to take themselves too seriously. The show aims to be entertaining, inclusive, and irreverent, while still taking the rules (somewhat) seriously. Join us every Thursday morning for brand new episodes available on all major platforms including; Spotify, iTunes, Google Play and more! If you haven't checked it out yet... what are you waiting for?!? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We share a common enemy. Who are you married to? Oh, it's not important, really. I don't really feel like getting into the whole conversation. Jack is just stunned. Oh, Warren! Look at all the blood. Oh, you should have seen it.

This is a sacred sight. You don't think that your ancestors could have installed some railings. Dad doesn't want a damn thing. One foot in the human realm. One foot in the elf realm. When Moradin stood on top of the bridge. Surprise! Welcome back to Dice Shane, episode 30, Water Under the Bridge.

This week's MVP is Jason Griffin. Jason's been hanging out with us on Facebook as one of our oldest fans. That sounds wrong. Legacy fans? Heritage fans? Yeah. Pepperidge Farm remembers. If you enjoyed Dice Shame and wonder how it all began, check out the Invictus stream on YouTube and wherever podcast.

can be found. We stream RPGs every Wednesday at 8 o'clock and have done so for the past six years. Right now, we're running the strain by Monte Cook Games. This is the precursor to dice shame. So if you enjoy the show, check us out live on YouTube every Wednesday night. Let's get to it. Let's do it. Remember when you were level one? Back when you barely had two hit points to rub together and you didn't have a single magic item? Yeah. Well, look at you jerks now! Yeah! It's level 30, guys.

Level 30. Level 30. It's six to 30. Episode 30. No, but you know what? That last battle was like we were in first level because we all ended up with under 10 hit points by the end of it. It's been a rough couple of weeks.

Oh, my. That's your tagline. It's been a rough level of time. Because it's so short of time. It's two weeks ago, I don't know, like 20 days ago. We were scrappy little nobodies trying to save a town. Now we're everybody's. And now we're slaying three-eyed frog.

I think now we're just traumatized in a number of ways. Traumatized from the fight, yeah. And now fear-stricken at the sight of a dragon that's just like what appeared, who's what, like double our size? Oh, no. She's easily three stories tall with a jawful of sharp teeth big enough to swallow you all whole again. Her whole body is covered in reticulated scales and spines. everybody make a dexterity save.

Oh, we're like right back into it. Okay. What'd y'all get? 8, 12, 10, 18. She raises up on her two back legs and beats her powerful wings. All of you are knocked prone from where you stand. And she screams at you. For those of you who understand Draconic.

Who sent you here? What do you desire? Have you brought me? Um, it's Turkic's ego. Yeah, for sure. I think I'd stay prone and just be like, we are sent here because we are trying to defeat the giants. We are here purely as servants of your glorious splendor. We have brought you the gift of an Etton's heart.

Please, please, we are here only to serve you. Show me this heart. Yeah, and Red would reach into the bag of holding and pull out the melon-sized Etton's heart and, like, float it in the water over to her or him. I don't really know what it is. Yeah, this, I mean, she's huge. She's bigger than the frog hemith was, as lately was.

She walks toward you surprisingly nimbly through the water, and she takes the heart in her jaws and just snap. it up. There's also a body here for you. Who are you? We are Jack and Kraloth, Doran, and Red, four who have been decided to reshape the ordaining. Uh, make a charisma check for me. Can I do it with advantage because I gave her heart? No. Persuasion? Sure. 23. She doesn't speak. She walks a large, slow circle around your group, around this stinking body of the frog hemoth. Her eyes narrow at you as she comes back around. Well, fair enough. And what do you want from me? Only information that you might be able to

offer, to aid us in our quest to vanquish what giants oppose this plane. Information I can give you. But I need more payment. of course we have these and I'm going to reach in and pull out the gemstones that we collected last time the rubies I believe there was a hundred dollar hundred gold pieces worth of rubies yeah it was just one one ruby so I pull out this large ruby and I present it up towards her the gray glint of light streaming through the trees sort of making it seem the same glint of light reflects off of each of her tiny teeth as she smiles at you and she says, Now that's getting a little bit better.

What else did you bring? Do I have the magic dust? No, I do. Okay. I turn towards Jack and in common, we'll just say, should we offer the magic dust? I mean, I don't really know what else we have to offer. That sounds nice.

She answers you in common. Yeah, Jack's kind of a kimbo in the top of this tree trying to... Oh, yeah. Yeah, you had been knocked prone while in a tree. You're like dangling. from branches caught on a branch of level below trying to like scramble up he's not a dexterous climber that's that's not his james i know that jack doesn't wear wizard robes but i love the idea of like him kind of being upside down and you know how like the robes kind of expose underwear when they

go outside i know he's not i know he's just wearing leather pants he looks cool but it'd be so funny jack will will fish around in his backpack and and pull out this bag of pixie dust she lowers her head to directly at your level jack you are staring in the face of this ancient green dragon. I know what it is. Great. She reaches out one huge hand, the size of your body, and delicately hooks a black claw through one of the drawstrings of the bag

and takes it from your hand. And she says, We share a common enemy. One which I am not interested in engaging. What are you interested in? We would love to know if you have any idea where we might go to vanquish such enemy. We know they have scoured this land. Of course I do.

She extends her long neck. Her head reaches up above the canopy of the trees. She folds her wings back down, shrugging her shoulders, and takes a more. casual posture in this marshy forest she sits back on her haunches and then she brings her head back down to a more comfortable level she's maybe her head's maybe 15 feet above the forest floor and she gazes around at each of you so you know you're against the giants but you don't know where they are or how to defeat them yes and This is why we have sought you out, oh great dragon.

And Doran just kind of exclaims, I've never seen such a magnificent, powerful creature in my life. You're incredible. That's interesting for Doran because Doran has like a blood feud with dragons. Yes and no, like fear, but I never really seen one right up close, like dealing with it personally. Yeah, right. I think he's someone who appreciates the awesome power of. whatever, you know what I mean?

Even if he fears it, I think he's still very much like, cool. Yeah, yeah. You have two allies in your cause. A harper mage in Everland has recognized the giant threat. Valharo. The second is a frost giant who wanders the north alone.

He vainly wears a helm made from a white dragon's skull. There is a temple at the spine of the world dedicated to the giant god anon you will learn what must be done to end the giant menace the frost giant will take you there thank you oh great powerful dragon we will leave your presence now unimpeded and i think we will skulk away there is no skulking out of a tree for me i'm just going to i'll help jack to skulk down like just got to freeze until the thing flies away uh yeah she she just starts eating the frog hemoth carcass like you know how when a dog is like super greedy hungry

like not even chewing just like oh yeah yeah sort of like throws her head back and catches scraps of this creature in her mouth dorin averts his eyes and just starts swimming back to where they came obviously in fear crayloff is still kind of um bewildered that he's is alive and he mutters a thanks to his God and... No problem. Oh, Kellenvore. Yeah, and he's going to begin, yeah, following

Red back and he's kind of limping. I'm imagining... Oh, we are bloodied. Yeah. And I think we're going to head back to Oren and the horses, and I think even though this great and powerful thing has stirred all of our brains, I think we're going to do it relatively quiet

because of the ass kicking we have just received. Oh, yeah, it's a limping, bloody retreat of like silent, Oh shit, we just faced death more than once in the last minute. Oh, yeah. Red might be one of those characters that the more that gets piled on him because he's kind of longed for adventure, he feels okay about it. And by the time we're out of the woods, I mean, it was a solemn walk back to camp and Oren.

I think Red is like, yes, and Oren must be just, I mean, he would have heard that thunder wave because it's a 300-foot sound, isn't it, when you thunder step? It's a big boom. So, at a big boom. A big boom. He must have heard that from where he is. happened to you. Oh, Warren! Look at all the blood. Oh, you should have seen it. Doran sliced this creature up from the inside

it, and we carved out in Edin's heart, and Grey-Oth got swallowed by a giant beast, and, oh, the stories you'll tell. This one makes such a good song. That's, oh, song, that's right, right guys? And I turned in the three of them, all under 10 HP are just like... Did you see a dragon? Did you meet him? Yes, we did. We did. Actually. Oh, no, it was glorious. We gave her the ruby and the magic dust, and and my gosh, she was so beautiful. She also told us that there's a few places we could follow up on. The Harper Mage in Everland, Val Harrow, I think, was the name.

The Frost Giant that wears a white dragon skull will lead us to a temple at the spine of the world. Wow. So many things that we can explore. Yeah, Jack's mind, he's been real quiet on that walk. He's definitely hurting. But I think he's been, like, putting those things on his mental map of, like, where he thinks Everland is and where the spine of the world is and trying to, like, remember. Has he ever heard of a frost giant wearing a white dragon helmet?

You know, has he ever, what does he know about Everland? Has ever heard of Val Harrow? Just trying to like place all those things in time and space and history. You definitely know Valharo. Awesome. He is, I would not say, friend of your family. Maybe something more like rival is appropriate. Okay.

But you know that he is one of the mages in Everland. In the meantime, we break down camp. Orrin prepares some eggs. Yeah, I think we'll do a long rest. I think we deserve it after that fight. And we'll use this time to cook, learn, and find out what we're doing in sleep. And we'll wake up early and make footprints. Everland is a city situated on the banks of the Ravin River.

It's north of the high forest. And Jack, you know that until recently, Everland was a member of the Lord's Alliance. Not anymore, unfortunately. there is a hall of elders where the city council meets to discuss issues affecting the city. You know that the most prominent edifice in Everland is called Moonglean Tower, which is a keep of black stone that serves as a Harper Stronghold. This would be where you would find Crohn Valharo, someone who is well known to your family and kind of antagonistic towards the house of wands. Yeah, I'm going to lean more on the like elf side of my family and not so much

on the like water deep noble house maybe if we're going there to meet them. Probably smart. How convenient. You know, it's the life of a half elf, right? You're sort of in two worlds anyways. You might as well lean into that. One foot in the human realm, one foot in the elf realm. Yeah, exactly. So you take a long rest there on the outskirts of the Crip Garden forest. Recover, lick your wounds. Everyone wants to rest. Take it easy. Yeah, absolutely. It dawns Maripanil 15. But it's a good 6 a.m.

We wake up. Again, red moves around the campsite, picking up the most colorful leaves in the area. So cute. A bright red one, maybe a green one on the edge of the forest. And as we're talking, so Jack, what do you think? Where should we go next? I have a few ideas, but.

So, yeah, I think Jack pulls up that map that he keeps in his head with the minor illusion and has all of the, like, different players and things we've seen on it. definitely now has a little dragon flying in a circle around the crypt garden forest and has the bodies of the etons and the crevice where the stone giant has this poor elf trapped in there and all of the little pieces of our adventure and now there's there's some new places that weren't on there before there's everland is now highlighted in this area and it's sort of up northeast of shadow top cathedral and and the high forest and doran has his little leather bound book that he's like opened sees you pull us up and he's like oh it shuts it puts it

back. Yeah. The map now extends a little further north to show the spine of the world in some real fuzzy details just to be like, they're here, but, you know, they're, and as I'm throwing on my quiver, I'm standing next to you, we all sort of congregate around the map. Jack, as you prepare spells for this day, you are again struck by this strange feeling, this goosebumps. You have some kind of arcane energy in your body that you didn't have before a few days ago. There's, there's this of him feeling those goosebumps and feeling just being very aware of his skin and and then immediately feeling a little claustrophobic and trying to push that down for a minute and and and focus on the like the map and this other task at hand and put that like something coming

inside him that is not in his control away a little bit well I think that Evelyn might be a good idea but it looks like you've marked it way up here on the north yeah well if we cut across the desert and valley here we could skirt the edge of the high forest and maybe maybe stop at Shadow Top Cathedral on the way. I'd love that. That's where Liferliss wanted us to go. That's right, to see that ancient ant and the giant killer. That's right. Yeah. So, we're thinking head to Shadow Top Cathedral and then up to Evelyn to speak to this recommendation by the Narbonne's.

I'm certain at the very least, Kroen would love to know that his name is falling from Nabone's lips as like a cautionary tale or something. And maybe that's worth a little bit of acknowledgement. Well, if he's also aware of the giant threat, he's an ally for sure. Yeah. Yeah. Well, let's start moving that way. Absolutely. Uh, shit fart.

Get over here. Hey. Come on, Asthma. We're going to start heading east towards where we know shadow top cathedral lies. Yeah. I think if we continue on this road, we'll probably end up going too far north and not far enough east. So let's just go off track. Let's go!

You travel across the somber hills for two days. This is grassland. Think Rohan from Lord of the Rings. Beautiful. The earth undulates in wide crests and valleys punctuated by rocky outcroppings and short cliffs below which narrow streams churn white. The wind is cold for the season and your days are uncomfortably chilly. Let's montage. Yeah, I think we do it typical.

I think red is up in the lead, scouting sometimes off horseback when we see movement in the distance. There are conversations, giant lessons. at night. Yeah. Yep. I think Oren is like collecting nuts, whatever he can find, like acorns along the way. Red is still every morning and after they break camp, is collecting very colorful leaves as they change.

Lots of reds and yellows. Is this your first autumn? No. Oh, you just want leaves. Correct. The day dawns bright on Marpinoff 17. Jack, it's your birthday today. Happy birthday.

Yeah, he's a little keen about it. He's, he's, you know, jacks up early like he normally is to say his prayers to Lithander. And as he exits the tent, Red specifically knew about the birthday and got up early. And all of the colorful leaves that he's been collecting are strung in like a streamer-esque way. There's red leaves and yellow leaves and green leaves, all in these sort of makeshift with bowstrings connecting them to the crops of trees surrounding us. and he's woken up Kralath and Doran before your prayers. And the minute you exit, you hear all of us, surprise! Happy birthday, buddy! Oren starts strumming the little guitar. And of course we sing Happy Birthday in Fyroon, which goes, Happy Birthday to you.

Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, dear Jack. You would, except for that horrible litch who'd put a copyright on that whole song. Yeah, yeah. I slayed that lich. Yeah, and we're all there. And, like, Red is so palpably excited.

Happy birthday! He runs up and hugs you. Jack will give Red a big hug back. Thank you. This is really touching. Thank you. Well, we knew it was a special day. We knew that you couldn't be with where you probably want to be,

but we wanted you to feel comfortable. Well, I'm happy to be sharing the road with you guys tonight. You got some presents. I don't know if you want to open them. Yeah, so I think in the back of his mind, he's thinking of the bottle of wine. He's like, well, maybe we'll have a little dinner tonight and I've got a bottle of something.

But Torin had also brought me something. I think he's waiting for maybe a private moment to open that one, just to... For sure. And I think we all know that about you. So it's like, the surprises here. And we're like, okay, we'll go do some things. Let's go find some nice. meet. Jack, as you settle down for the morning to do your prayers, a familiar glossy black

raven lands at your feet. This is Iston, your father's familiar. He clicks his beak regally and drops a message in front of you before taking wing back into the sky. So there's a whole moment where it's like, well, he remembered, that's great. Of course, he doesn't want to hear from me. Iston takes off immediately. He doesn't give a shit about any message back. Dad doesn't want a damn thing. He just needs to be like, do this. So there's like, it's like touching, but also enraging in every way to be like, fucking typical. I'm messaging you his letter. If you'd like to read it for us. I'd love to read it. I think it would be better in your voice than mine. All right. So the letters dated Suzail, Moonrise, Marpanoth the 15th, 1492. Johanna Sieveben page, wilderness between water deep

and elsewhere. I hope this letter finds you well. heard from your sister that you've taken off on a lofty quest, and I must say I'm pleasantly surprised. I began to worry you were going to settle both for the rote academia of Waterdeep and for the courtship of someone with half your talent and lifespan. Olinar manages to visit at High Harvestide, by the way. She brought a jar of candied plum she's crazy about. I should think she'd like to see you sometime. Why don't you drop in on her? For myself, I've been touring the Lake of Dragons lately, Dragon Mirror in the Cormoran tongue. Fascinating stuff, enough to furnish me with notes for at least my next two books. Did you know that Saruk are native to this region?

There are writings that mention a changing of the stars. I'm just finishing up on translation. Whoever said old men can't keep up, huh? I'm proud of you, Jack, for it seems you are finally, truly following in my footsteps and bringing your share of glory to the House of Wands. I can see myself in you, setting out to traverse the Wilds of Farron with your hirelings. Anywho, happy birthday, my boy, enclosed you'll find a note for a thousand gold pieces which you can convert in any decent city, as you well know. Though be sure to check the reputation of the place. First, Johannes, there are some really exquisite new spells out there these days that will invoke

such indistinguishable illusions. It would fool even your mother. May the morning lord light shine down upon you, Lord Mescar Wands. He folds it safely, puts it in his map case with everything else, and pulls out the little gift from Torin. gift that Torin gave to you, Jack, inside of the colorful paper is a small wooden box, skillfully made and closed with a silvery latch. A flick of the latch enables you to lift the lid, revealing a small forged silver instrument. It's about six inches long. On one end, two carved

ram's heads face away from each other with their horns interlocked, forming a handle. There's a seam just underneath this sculpted handle. And as you release the handle from its sheath, reveals two blunt silver prongs. This looks to be an antique cork puller. Yeah, so there's definitely a moment of like just all smiles on his face because of course Torin thinks of everything. He's a very thoughtful boy. And then... It's more than 100 years old. Beautiful. Do I know the silver smith who made it? It was probably crafted between 400 and 600 years ago, judging from the style, probably local to water deep area. You would think this may have been a piece by Bard Leone. That's incredible. Incredible. What a antique piece of history. Jack has just stunned. So he comes back from his prayers a minute ago, all smiles. And he was trying to be like, well, let's save this for later, but can't help himself now. As he sees, I'm sure, Kralath is making breakfast. Yeah, I think we've come back with some special meat, like a rabbit or something. Yeah, we come back with a skin rabbit. I'm like pulling the skin off it as we arrive. Jack, you've done your prayers.

Yeah, and a visit from my dad's familiar, so that had a letter with it, which, you know. That's nice that he remembered. It is. I'm going to take it for what it's worth there. It was nice of him to remember and bothered to sending a letter, so that's nice. You guys got to see this. And Jack goes into this whole spiel about Barrett Leone and some of the other famous pieces and some of like, do you remember we were in that place where the guards were?

They've famously got some of Barrett's pieces there. But anyways, I have one now, too. Here is this cork puller, and he pulls out. the box that Red was originally supposed to give to him today, but he got a little early and there's a, I think it's just enthusiasm as he opens up the... Yeah, and I think Red also has like, there's no bitterness or anything. There's like a soft smile on his face, happy that we all get to share it together. The piece looks very cool. Oh, this is gorgeous. You had said at one point in the note from Toran, what type of wine it was.

Yeah, so inside of the wooden crate stuffed with straw, there's a dusty black glass bottle with a yellow peeling label that holds a herbaceous liquor. The label is carefully scrawled with green ink. Elder flower brandy 1475. I'm sure this pairs beautifully with your breakfast, but why don't we try it anyways? And I take this silver cork puller and very carefully, you know, work the tines in around the cork on this brandy

and pop it out. Elderflower brandy from the year Torin and I met. Cheers, I'll sort of say it. That smells delicious. Take a swig right from the bottle and pass it around. Can't share it with it. Toran, but I am happy to share it with the four of you. It's delicious. You're overcome with nostalgia.

Theron, stop drinking. You drink it too much. Wow. I must say, you're certainly surrounded by people that care about you, Jack. Well, thank you. I mean, I'm really touched by the leaves and the decorations. That's really cute. Thank you. Well, I've got to hand it to Red because I certainly had nothing to do with that. Kieran walks over to you and says, hey boss, I brought you a present. happy birthday oh kieran thank you they drop a dead mouse at your feet if you're not going to eat that by the time that the bottle of brandy gets back over to me like cheers kieran uh harlan that was a very inspired and adorable decoration you've been planning it so i didn't do it for that but ah thank you for the inspiration i love that like tressums are like these super intelligent creatures yeah

but still believe that like dead creatures are be all this There's no question that Kieran knows how this is going to make Jack feel. Like, they're like, I'm going to do this because it's funny. Yeah. So, when do you guys celebrate your birthdays or have you ever? I haven't, no. I was born in a big litter, so we shared birthdays, so it wasn't really important for us to distinguish one or the other.

I think Red's birth was almost a frivolity, you know what I mean? It was very like, okay, one of 60, da-da-da-da. And that's, but it's not a sad point. I think in Tabaxi culture, it's just... I mean, if you ever wanted, it would be fun to have a day to celebrate you, Red. you if you wanted to pick one. Well, I would love to celebrate the day that I arrived here and wanted me. I don't have a birthday either, but I kind of like that idea.

Maybe we should celebrate the day we met. Birthday buddies? Dear! Oh, all right. Dear? Oh, deal. What do you say here over here? Total meta conversation right now.

I don't know if dwarves are born. Yeah. Yeah, they are. Okay. Because they were originally made. That's like Adam and Eve were made and then every subsequent human were. But I was still curious, like if something weird happened, like if we hatch from eggs. Like, I don't know, right?

I just never actually thought about it. So I googled dwarf births. Well, I got his own. That's awkward. So then I found one on dwarfism. So, Doreen, when's your birthday? Oh, I was born on 25 flame rule. Nice.

I'm going to be 109 this year, actually. Wow. Wow. Yeah, it's been a good stretch so far. A marriage in there and a friendship to boot. Oh, this is a short marriage, but. I thought you said it lasted 15 years. Well, yeah, sure.

I guess relative to being 1009, that's pretty short. That's right. I don't like to dwell on it because I'm getting a gray hair here and there. Who are you married to? Oh, it's not important, really. I don't really feel like getting into the whole conversation right. Fair. There's a bit of a story.

Listen, come on. We've got to get moving. Come on. All right. And I kind of winked to Jack. I'll fill you in later. The Desert and River splits the hilly plains of this valley in half, running north to south. You continue moving along the river, looking for a way to

pass. Wait, wait a minute. What? Do you think we could go in this direction? Is this this, this is the Dessoran River? Yeah, well, I'm... Go this way. There's something I want to see. Oh, and I'm going to hang back, and I'm going to let Dorn take the lead for a bit. Oh, yeah, so I lead

us along the river a little short ways, and then... Doren leads you up a small hill, and you see a wide plain of the Desert and Valley. The river runs wide here and shimmers with rapids. Stretching across it is a feat of Dwarven engineering that would strike awe into even the most world-weary wizard.

It's a marvelous, unsupported, two miles across and 400 feet at its apex, only 15 feet wide and conspicuously lacking any railings or safety barriers. This is the stone bridge. Oh my God. What is this? This.

This is a sacred site of pilgrimage for many of us dwarves. Many centuries ago. Moradin actually appeared atop of the bridge. And he rallied the dwarves of the Iron Star clan against a horde of orcs. Look, up there, I never ever thought that I would lay my eyes upon this incredible feet. Look at it, it stretches for two miles. Wow.

At the highest point, it's almost 400 feet. And Doran points up to this massive granite archway. That almost disappears into the clouds, like, you know, the sunny clouds of the day. And you see as this massive, beautifully crafted, smooth stone bridge just, it goes, it's immense. It's it's a sight. It's beautiful. I'd like to find where the bridge starts. And so I do.

And we kind of follow it. And we find where it begins. It's just the way across the river? Yes. Well, look at that. Doran, this is magnificent. You don't think that your ancestors could have installed some railings. They didn't need them.

We're sure-footed. And in fact, there was battles that took place on this. And our foes were sometimes thrown from the edge. Well, our foes as well as some of our own. For example, the founder of the ancient Dwarven Kingdom, Bessilmer, Toril-Lam-Tong. He died fighting a hill giant, right in the middle of this bridge. It was an incredible sight

and stories tell of Torild doing this. Well, and Basilma, the name of that place we were heading. Yes, in fact, I think Torild Flamedong was buried there with his great battle axe. Interesting. But this is, oh, this is so exciting. Look, and as we approach the... Dorn, like, runs up it.

Yeah, as we approach, like, the gradient that seems to slow. out of the ground where there's patches of grass and then it starts and it slopes up there's like a big carved imprint of Moradin's symbol on the ground. Yeah, this is a holy sight. Don't worry, Kravath. I'll stick right beside you as we cross. There's lots of space in the, if you don't go near the edges, there's lots of space to walk in between. Doran runs ahead and he and he starts to climb up this somewhat steep slope. And I bring shit fart behind because You got off and ran up the minute. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Come on, shit, fuck. But it seems to go up and up and up, and it just goes up, and it seems like we're already to 300 feet. That's a lot of D6s of damage. And you're sure it's stable? This thing, and I stomp on it. There's not even, like, not even an echo, no sound, just like a, of your foot on solid stone.

Do I have an engineering. Kralov. Say, Dornan, you see. said Moradin, your god, appeared on here? The deity. Yes, he stood right in the middle as he raised his hammer in the sky and a flash of lightning came out. Well, at least I imagine, you know, it was such an incredible sight.

I would have loved to be here to see Moridian. Oren starts strumming his lute. Is that a strungible instrument? Yes. He called it a ditherd at one point. That's a, I wish that we have re-recorded that. Because it made me sound really dumb. It's a sither.

I know, it's a sither. There's no dither? No, that's what someone does when they make a stupid sound. They're dithering. Oh, yeah. Works out. That's what I was doing when I said that word. Oren pulls out his lute and is like, yes, in fact, there's a wonderful ballad about Morden on the stone bridge.

Could you potentially sing it? It would be nice to get my mind off of the 400 feet of it. Of course I will. When Moradin stood on top of. the bridge, and he raised his big iron hammer, and he hailed to the gods, and he hailed to his foes, and all the dwarven they took over. Clammer? Nope.

What else rhymes with hammer? That's how the ballad goes. Goes on to just talk about all the things that fall off the bridge. And rocks and shoes, and people and shoes, and more rocks and other shoes. And like the next verse is about the wind whipping across the bridge and almost Yeah, yeah And the humans did fall

He fell so far He was so bald Of the people that fell It's mostly about shoes There was fog off the brave And pylow the sad And so and dend and da And he goes on and on and on

Yeah And Crayloff is just like Humans and one was the grave cleric I had to say this excites me so much Because not only not only is it like obviously an ancient Dwarven pilgrimage but you know just the size and the magnitude even in real life like myself

Alex I get so excited about seeing these things and just I like I love seeing Doren get excited about things yeah right I picture that him with his little body like shaking up and down his little beard bouncing once we get up to the higher archways we see like there's a huge gusts of wind that come whipping across your cloaks are just snapping in the wind your hair

your beard all of it the ponies mains and tails I think instinctively red would dismount Asta and walk her I don't know why but I feel like it makes more sense yeah I think I think that's Jack's instinct too is to to walk Amic here across just to lower your profile so you're not tipping over

something about the higher profile yeah it feels like you're gonna get win so he'll be walking shit fart and Asta Doren 25 feet ahead just Like, I picture him walking a few steps, spinning around, walking a few, bending over, like, touching the stone, standing up, looking around. Like, he's just so busily. Every score on the earth being like, whose footprint was that? Was this one more than his footprint?

Maybe it was that one. And then I kind of hang back, so I'm alongside Kralath and Robin, which is like, God, look at it. He's so cute. When the wind starts blowing, I think Krayloth is going to reflexively cast a spell, and he's going to cast Enhanceability. Okay. He's going to cast bull's strength to increase his ability to hunker down and... Can you cast that on yourself? Touch a creature and bestow upon it, magical enhancement.

Choose one of the following effects. Crayloth touches himself for the second time. Happy birthday to me. The real reason I wanted to stay behind. Bull's strength. Wonderful. How long does that last for? It's up to one hour.

Wow, okay. So hopefully until I get across the bridge. Well, it's two miles across, so... As you approach the midpoint of the bridge, you watch another traveler moving towards you. They have an animal of some kind at their side trotting along placidly. Doren, turn around and come back. It's not until you're about 250 feet away that you can see the creature clearly. It's a heavily armored fire giant, carrying an enormous great sword.

It is striding in your direction confidently. What? Oh boy, I'm all fired up, but this battle will be without Chester. Let us commemorate his departure last week with this Limerick written by friend, fan, and fellow podcaster Elizabeth Wilcox from the Dimension Door podcast. There once was a die we call Chester, who happily rolled for Equester. His high rolls gave him fame, yet he also earned shame. Now he'll never escape sequester. Thanks, Elizabeth.

See you next week. Thank you.