Dice Shame - 66 | 'Blood Will Have Blood'

Episode Date: January 14, 2021

A moment of respite is interrupted by the return of an enemy thought to be vanquished... Comedy, action and a whole lot of shaming come together in Dice Shame, an Actual Play Podcast of Storm King's Thunder by Wizards of the Coast! Join our GM Jo; her partner Harlan, his brother Alex & their best friends Justin and Rob as they tackle the daunting world of Faerun in this legendary adventure module! Dice Shame is a podcast that welcomes its audience to the gaming table. Like the games they play at home, they try not to take themselves too seriously. The show aims to be entertaining, inclusive, and irreverent, while still taking the rules (somewhat) seriously. Join us every Thursday morning for brand new episodes available on all major platforms including; Spotify, iTunes, Google Play and more! If you haven't checked it out yet... what are you waiting for?!? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I shoot Doren in the leg. Good. Roll a hit. The imagery in my mind is this axe winking at Jack. Doran, don't get close to us. Old one two on one of these. Bingo, bingo, buddy. Take your aim and shoot at this foul dead bastard.

He's trying to get ready to swing his mace at it and he keeps on hesitating. Grayloff, no! Is that another natural one? The third dive rolled today. Wow. And that is three natural ones. You are shook to your core. Welcome back to Dice Shame, episode 66, Blood will have blood.

MVP this week is Elisa Ellie, who's just joined us from Discord and Patreon. Welcome, Elisa. Welcome. Looking to show your support? Dice Shame, as well as our sister shows, Malevolent and the Invictus stream, all have merch available now. stickers, shirts, tote bags, and more. Head to DiceShamepodcast.com slash merch to check out our continually growing selection. We got something for everybody.

All right. Shall we do this? Yeah, let's do it. Everyone roll for initiative. Oh, my God. Rolled two dice tonight, and they have both been natural ones. Oh, bummer. Shame it.

For shame, this beautiful, clear, pink dye, dice chain. Gone. Shame on you. All right, Red, what's your initiative? 16. Doren? Also 16. Oh, who wants to go first?

Twiddons. Red can go first. Jack? Five. Okay, Kralath. Natural one. Oh, no. Shame that dice.

You know what? Shame it. I haven't shamed to die in a long time. You do it. Liferless has rolled me. many natural 20s. Oh, for shame, one, natural one, too many.

You know, it's all about in the clutch. We showed off and we're a little braggadocious last time, so we're in trouble. I got a feeling. It just goes to show you that no dice is safe from being shamed. Except for the ones I'm not rolling. Because I remember Liferless did you real well, real well on the path.

I'm talking like 20s all over the place, but nobody is safe from the shame. We have some combatants on the field. If it wasn't clear from my exposition, these are undead assailants. They are riding horses. And four of them pull out longbows and fire at you, Jack. I don't run from you. You got two knights of the Eternal Order here.

By the light of Moriton. 23 to hit? Yes, that will hit. Six piercing damage. Yeah, natural 20. Oh, no. Kralath is going to use his reaction to stop that critical from being crit, y'all. Fuck yeah.

Stop that critical from being a crit. Get to deal crit damage. But you got to deal at least three in a combat for it for me to run out. Or get us out of range. So that's another six piercing damage, Jack. Oh. Damn. Ow.

These arrows just whizzing out of the darkness from these undead creatures atop their horses. I am rolling great here. Yeah. This is another 23 to hit. Well done. I rolled a 19 at 20 and then another 19. So that's eight piercing damage to you. Oof, okay.

The final arrow zings through the darkness and misses you, Jack. Thank you. Interestingly, this is the first time that we've had a combat that thematically, if Jack died, I think it would be okay. Yikes! I don't mean that I want that to happen in any way, but like every other combat... But thematically on a story level. You know what I mean?

Like, this idea of it's real chill, it's after a wedding, he just had this really emotional, like, uncovering of love and stuff like that. Like, if this were a story, this would be the first time if I was reading, I'd be like, oh my God, Jack could die here. I hear you're saying. Just saying that. The final creature on horseback that has its long sword extended at you drives its horse forward Jack until it's about 20 paces from you.

And then it glares. Oh, scary. I'm glaring at you. Make a wisdom saving throw. Oh. How do we love a seven? Oh, you don't love it. No?

In fact, you are paralyzed. Perfect. I love these fights. Paralyzed on turn one. They're my favorite. Yeah. Yep. Paralyzed turn one. This creature has it out for you. It's weird. I wonder why. Can you think of a reason why these creatures might be super interested in murdering you, Jack? Me personally. It's like I might have done a slight to them in some fashion. Maybe some kind of fireball. I mean, it's interesting because only four of them have long bows and one of them does not. It's curious. In fact, those long bows that they're wielding look very similar to the long bow that you have strapped to your back red. These are some kind of, it looks like maybe some kind of version of the hunt lords. They don't have the same corpses that they used to. These are fresh.

These are bleeding, postulating corpses. Oh. Right. They were in the Iceman Dale episode. No. No, these were the guys that he fireballed, remember? They're wearing the same armor, but they have different corpses. Yeah, they're one of those funky undead spirit swap body bullshit, is my guess.

Spirit swap, body bullshit. Jack, you fail your save. And so this creature stares at you from horseback with its long sword pointed out, and you can tell that you are its quarry. There is some kind of understanding that reaches the deepest recesses of your brain that this thing has been hunting you for days. Yeah, that's chilling. And there is a satisfied look on this corpse's face

as its tongue lolls out, as these flies crawl in and out of the gaping wounds on its body, that it will never stop hunting you. And you are frozen with fear. Yeah. And you're paralyzed. Red, what do you do? How many hit points do you have, Jack?

30 out of 50. I turn to Thera and I say, get out of here, take the horses and find somewhere safe. B, you follow after her with Oren. Yeah, and she grabs the reins of the horses and takes off into the trees. Red is agape. He looks over to Jack, paralyzed beside him. And then I shoot my eyes back towards this lead hunter. Do I get the impression that they're going to keep pounding Jack until he's dead?

Or are they going to maybe go for the rest of us now that he's paralyzed? Roll insight. That was a good roll. Guys, 24. I'm proud of you. Nicely done. As a hunter with hunter's mark, you know the look of a hunter. And the fire that burns in this undead creature's eyes tells you that these things are here to murder Jack and that's it.

Interesting. Shit. Okay. Well, then, Red looks towards the lead hunter and looks towards the other four guys and says, I'm sorry, guys. and he pulls out a headless arrow from his quiver, and he's going to cast Fog Cloud. God damn it. No!

I have to. I take back everything I ever said. There's no battle. I mean, it's the only way to give us cover in a place that doesn't have cover. I mean, is that a bad idea? I feel like... No, it's great. I love it.

They don't have tremor sense, right? They have Trevor sense. They can sense any trevers within 30 feet. Maybe I'll say that. Should I give us some cover? I can cast fog cloud. I get the idea that they'll still be able to hit him even with it. All right.

So don't. Oh, oh, stop it. It would probably prevent them from targeting any of you, but Jack would still be... I'll do what I do best. Kill the motherfucker, and I stand up, and I am going to move. I'm going to move 90 feet towards the nearest tree. I'm imagining that there are trees around us. There are, yes.

You're still kind of in the depth. of the high forest. Perfect. So I'm gonna move to the nearest tree and if I can try to scale it to a branch to give me some height. Is that possible within 90 feet because I do am I feeling agility?

Yeah, there's, let me see. I mean, there's probably a tree within like 30 feet of you. Perfect. I'm gonna use my bonus action to cast fairy fire. I'm gonna aim my bow and I'm gonna use my bonus action

to cast fairy fire. So he needs to do a DC save of 12. And I'm gonna do it on the main one that's pointing with the sword at Jack. Right. And you know these are not humanoids, correct? Correct. It's a five. Nice, dude. Way to go.

He is bathed and fairy fire. We now have advantage on every hit we do to this lead guy. So this creature is just like outlined in red fire. Nice. Nice shot, Red. Jack, you can barely manage a grunt. And I am going to attack first with my sharpshooter penalty. Hit him dead on the eye there, Red.

Oh, 23. Do it. You hit him. So good. That's 16 damage. Wow. Yeah, great. And I'm going to fire again, this time, using Colossus Slayer. And I even forgot to roll with advantage that first time, so this time we'll be with advantage. Here you go. Hey, ho. 16?

Yeah, you hit. You aim through these skeletal branches, devoid of leaves, and your arrow just slides right through them right on target. 22 damage. Beautiful. Wow, nice. Whoa. And I'm just going to step. behind the trunk as much as I can to try to get covered from the other bows. Clamber from branch to branch just to give yourself some cover. Doran, you look across the fire through the flames of these creatures that are just

approaching the campsite from all directions. They're kind of in a semi-circle and closing in. What do you do? I see from across the fire the one mounted horseman, undead, whatever he is, approach Jack and suddenly the instinct inside me boils over. Doran jumps across the fire and rushes into the face of this mounted dead man. Yes. And brings his axe across into the chest of the dead man. Hopefully. First, before you do any of this, roll acrobatics for me to see just how great a job of Jack be nimble situation you do. Um, acrobatics is a 14.

Not bad. Yeah, you jump clear over the flames. They lick at your feet, but you suffer no damage and the smoke parts. This cannonball of a dwarf just sails through the darkness and collides almost with this undead. And you attack with your axe? Yes, I do. Do it. And that is going to be a, an unnatural 20.

Easy. How much damage? Actually, 22. I just can't count. um doing nine damage slashing yeah you land a hit on its leg yes i hit his leg and i bring my axe up again to hit with another 22 beautiful yeah 12 more damage excellent dorin you're like standing chest high at this horse this huge slavering heaving animal who's clearly been just ridden almost to exhaustion and you sink two healthy hits into this undead creature. Jack?

So, I'm paralyzed with fear. Yes. I'm wondering if that means I can still think. You can. I would like you to make another wisdom save. I would love to. How about a, that's better, 16. Jack, you can do nothing but watch as Doran launches himself over you and lands two heavy hits with Ork Splitter into this undead creature. and as you see the glint of this magical steel in the moonlight

and you hear or expletor going, ha-ha, fuck you! You are enervated with courage and you recover from your fear. So you are, at the end of your turn, you recover from your paralysis. Cool. The imagery in my mind is this axe winking at Jack. Yeah.

Am I aware enough to like look at this thing over and see if I know anything about it? Sure. Yeah. Yeah, you can roll a religion check. Holy balls. That's a one. Is that another natural one? The third die I have rolled today. Wow. And that is three natural ones. Wow.

Hatateek. Shame it. You are shook to your core. I don't think you've ever been hunted before. No. The notion and that this thing would maybe continue to hunt you even beyond the events of tonight, regardless of whether you devastate this creature's body that it might somehow rejuvenate itself and continue hunting you is just more than you can even conceive of. It's got some implications that I'm not comfortable with. That's for sure.

Kieran is going to skedaddle. I think they're going to get 60 feet away. Cool. Kralath. It's your turn. Crayloth sees that Jack is slowly coming to, but he sees the other hunt lords pulling their bows again, ready to attack him. And Crayloth runs in front of Jack and slowly lowers him to the ground. He says, looks like our boys are back, eh? And I'm going to lower him so that he's prone. And he's going to have, everybody's going to have disadvantage on ranged attacks against him. And as I'm lowering, I'm going to cast warding bond on him.

Very smart. Love that. Nice. So you get Jack into a position that you know from your military training is going to be challenging for these creatures to hit him. And you cast boarding a bond. Very good. B is also in the initiative order.

She looks around the firelight on her face, and you see she looks back over her shoulder at Oren, who is kind of cowering away from this fight in her shadow, and she kind of grabs him by the, shoulder by the haversack, and she just drags him backwards into the tree line to where Kieran is sitting in the branches of a tree and tucks him away behind a fallen log. These creatures all draw back on their bowstrings and attempt to pierce Jack with their terrible arrows once more. So with disadvantage now, let's see how effectual they are, tend to

hit? No. Seven to hit? Nope. Oh, 19? So can I take reactions? You can. Yeah, you are no longer paralyzed. So Jack raises his hand. Like, he finally comes to and raises his hand and a shield pops up in front of him and it starts to deflect the arrows as they fly towards him as he sort of regains himself and clutches, like with his underhand searches around his neck for the knights of the eternal order symbol that Kralath had given him and sort of holds it in the other hand and

nods to his friend who just cast a spell over him. Okay, we can do this. The final arrow bounces off of this with a six to hit and your shield is effectual. Doren, the other hunt lord that you just attacked looks down at you with these fiery eyes and it occurs to you that perhaps you could also become quarry for this hunt.

Make a wisdom save. You can look at me with those fiery eyes. but you're not burning me. Furi eyes. See the magic between you and I. An 11. You fail, Doren. This notion shakes you to your core and you are paralyzed.

I say that, and then our eyes connect, and I'm like, Oh, oh, you're scary. Red, it's your turn. You watch as Doren is about to swing again, and then the axe just stays in his grass. Doren, snap out of it! I shoot Doren in the leg. Good. Roll a hit.

I'm going to attack the... Don't do that. What? Don't do that? What? I am going to attack the lead hunter that is outlined in Ferry Fire. Roll with advantage. Roll with plantage.

Well said. That is a dirty 20. You hit. Nice. 25 damage Wow Good one Holy

Bang He's still standing Oh yeah He's still standing Better than he ever did On the back of a horse I think we are worried guys All right

I'll attack again All of our different lyrics I just get muddled I hate Dice with symbols on them Because I've rolled a symbol And I don't know if it's a one or a 20 Let it be known

It is a 20 So I'm a natural 20 But My joy has been sucked I Oh boy I do not like dice With symbols on the 20s

Who's sucking on your joy Roll all of your damage dice Twice my love No I'm gonna cancel it No just just joking There is your joy back 20 damage You are single handedly

Almost killing one guy Yeah it makes me worried. Pat's on the back, my brother. It's almost like they've been imbued with some kind of strength. Red looks angrily at Jack. It's my fault, I know. Jack's just laying down. Doran, what do you do? You are paralyzed. Doran's going to try and roll to unparalyzed.

He's going to try and shake himself. Make a wisdom save. Oh, it's a natural 20. Hey! There you go. So I snap out of it, but I don't get to act on this turn. It's at the end of your turn, yes. Doren's like, oh.

Yes, you unparalyzed yourself. and now you are free and feeling good about it. I'm feeling good, but also afraid. Jack, it's your turn. Jack staggers to his feet, and he's got the tags from the Eternal Order in one hand, and he fishes into his pocket to pull out his spellguard spear. He pulls out a bunch of gum and some transfers.

I mean, he finds it eventually. He's a little disheveled, but he pulls out his arcane focus, and he holds it up and channels a whole. whole pile of radiant light into it and this streaking ball flies into the middle of the cluster of three of these monsters and explodes in holy light and it's it's he's twisted the spell with everything he's got to sort of pull their attention to it to sort of trick them into looking at it every every sort of like a maze that draws the eyes eyes towards the center of us and then explodes in a way that burns their brains out so a a fireball that I'm gusing

turning to radiant energy and making it an intelligence save. Cool. I mean, fireball. I got some weird bullshit I can do because I'm a dude. You are a dude. It's a guy thing. So I'll come up with a casting, which I spend an extra first level spell slot to add some force damage in there. So I would like in DC-15 intelligence saves from those three horses and those three men so that they cannot be put back together again. the furthest from you undead creature atop its horse fails that intelligence save and has the fireball burned directly into its undead slippery brain mass the other two save

so 48 damage wow nice 10 of its force and 38 of it is radiant um all of those horses die nice so you murder three horses Fuck them. Jesus. So rude. Well, I feel like they interrupted our lovely camp evening. The horses? Yeah. They were guided by these bastards.

Wonderful. Okay, Jack, so this huge spire of flames just licks up out of the ground where these undead are riding the horses, just singeing Doren's beard as it narrowly misses him. It does, yeah, yeah. I'm standing there shocked. Jack is going to stand. stagger back towards Kralath to sort of try and get back to back with him. He's, you know, taking some of his movement to stand up, but he gets standing beside

Kralath and the fire and looking out at the forest that's been burned away by the radiant light and the forceful blast that he just put out there. Yeah, everyone's fucking eyes are just smarting with this bloom of flame that interrupts the darkness. And Kralath says, just keep doing that, Jack, and we got this. I don't have so many of those left. Kralath, it's your turn. He's going to cast sanctuary on you as a bonus action, which is a concentration spell.

So my concentration is up. But anything that attacks you has to do a wisdom-saving throw or forfeit their attack or change target, which could be me. And then I'm going to shout to Red. Hey, Red! Yeah, buddy! Old one two on one of these. Bingo, bango, buddy. Which one?

Let's do the one of the North. It's too far, Red. I can't make it. I mean, you can run. I'm just going to focus on defending Jack. I'm going to take the defense, the defend action. Awesome. So, it is these undid creatures' turns, top of the round.

The one that's directly in front of Doran no longer atop its horse sort of steps clear of the horse's burning carcass, and then tries to stab you with its long sword. Of course it would. 20 to hit. Okay. So that's eight slashing damage. All of the other.

Undead, close in on you. Here they come. And you feel their eyes on you. Jack, Kralath, I want each of you to make two wisdom saves. Yikes. You got a plus one on your saving throw, remember? Oh, I do. Yeah, yeah. All right.

I got a 16 and an 18. Hey, you're good, Kralath. All right. I got a 20 and a 23. You're good. Jack, both of you just kind of cast your gaze aside as you feel these piercing eyes just bore into your soul and you know that they are coming for you, but you stand resolute against this fury and fear.

Not again. Don't you guys know when to quit? Red, it's your turn. What do you do? I'm going to kill the guy in front of them, the one that's bathed and fairy fire. You see these creatures closing on your friends and you draw back on your bow. And now I draw back on my bow. That was a fart.

Excuse me. I rolled a natural one. Oh, God. But you rolled with advantage. And a natural 20. Holy cow. That's awesome. I was waiting for you to say that.

The suspense. Isn't that crazy? Alex didn't take the bait. I didn't. He's too good. He knows me too well. How much damage do you deal? I'm going to roll this twice, so.

29 damage. Oh. Well done. Very nice. I will attack him. again. 18 a hit. You do. You hit. Hey, nice. Max on my damage dive. Let's do it. Put them down.

22 damage. Yeah, the arrow sinks deeply into this corpse's skull and you knock it off its feet and it just falls to the earth and expires. And I say, go back to being dead, you fuck. For now. For now. For now.

For now. For now. For now. For now. For now. And I step back behind the tree. Doran, it's your turn. you do. Doran strides over the fallen dead body of the dead horseman and approaches the other dead unhorsed horseman. How many dead can fit into this sentence?

Dead horsemen. Over the dead horseman. He takes the horse size dead horse. He winds up his axe and he takes a little big swing only to fuck off a natural one. Oh. No. No. There's no advantage on that one either, is there?

No, there's not. Brutal. You whiff it. You know what? I'm going to use my luck. Hey, there you go. Yeah, he's got luck points. Hey, good job.

Alex, you remembered your luck points. Wow, haven't used that in a while. Luck be a 20 tonight. A 27 to hit. Holy fuck. Yeah, that's what we like to see. Quite the difference. Doing.

Do it, coward. 13 damage. Well done. Yes. Going to hit it again? And yeah, same guy. I'm going to swipe again. And that's going to do 17 to hit.

Well done. Okay. Doing all right, full damage. That's 18 damage. Fuck, yeah. Crushing it. You're fucking door and iron fist. Split this like an orc.

And this whole time, Ork splitter's like, Yeah. I'll use my action surge and perform one additional action. Oh, yeah. That's a 25. to hit. Uh-huh. 10 damage, 10 more damage.

All damage is good damage. Yes, I agree. Jack, you watch from beside the fire as Doran strides over to his new target and just starts hacking at it like a tree. Yeah. What do you do? Jack wraps the symbol of the Eternal Order

around his sphere, and so now it's this crystal sphere wrapped in chains with the dog tags dangling from it, and he holds it up up above his head, and it starts to glow like the sun until six rays of light shoot down three at the one in front of Doran and three at the one that's just to the north of Jack that way. And these radiant missiles of light fly out at them. So we're going to do some magic fancy missiles.

Nice. 11, 14, 17. Great. 42 damage. Nice. And yeah, I think he's got it holding above in his head in both hands. And as the beams of light fly out, Kieran sort of flies back over to him and stands on his shoulder as Jack's now like up and ready

and bathed in this holy radiant light. Cool. Kralath, what do you do? Kralath standing in front of Jack. He sees these two undead horsemen approaching on their mounts and he looks behind him and he sees the other undead on their feet

crawling forward and he shouts to Red. Is it time? Ah, you son of a bastard. The old one, too! Get ready, and I'm going to use my channel divinity and use Path to the Grave on the Huntsman to the North. Bingo, bango, buddy! You got this.

It's the creature's turns. They walk slowly, ever closer to you, with determination. These guys is dumb. Yeah, like who walks? They should be jogging at least. So the two to the south, still on horseback, ride up all the way. close to you, Jack, Kralath. And each of them swipe at you with a long sword. So I need to make a

wisdom save in order to target Jack, correct? Correct. That's a 15? Yep, that's fine so they can hit. So the creature attacks you, Jack, with its long sword, sneering 15 to hit you. That will miss. And you deflect it with your powerful wizardly magic. It's the shield of faith that Kralath provided, actually, that makes the difference. between a blade that would have stabbed my heart and the warding blonde that saved me.

Your ring glows a bright white. Yeah. The other creature stabs down at you, Kraloth, from its mount. It's a 23 to hit you. Oh, that's going to hit. He's been stabbed with a NASCAR blade. Basically, these are absolutely like which king shit.

Two-handed slashing damage. Here we go. Ooh, that's max. We got 12 slashing damage, Krayloff. The other creature that's menacing you, Doren, right up against you. Yeah, let's see it. Takes a wild swing at you and misses with a 13. I'm going to use my repost then.

You dance back out of the way. Great reaction. I picture you like kind of doing like a spin. Yeah. Like deflecting the blade and then coming back around kind of behind it. Yeah. Let's see if you're blushing as you attack. But you're a little pale.

14 to hit. You do. Nice. All right. 20 damage. What does it look like when you kill it? Oh, yes. I'm like, you attack me?

I attack you and I take its head right and like clean off. Yeah. So his tongue goes lopping around. The other creature walks up to behind where you're standing Kraloff and takes a final swing at Jack with this long sword. Wisdom save. Again, that's a 15. That's going to be good.

He can swing. And a 20 even to hit, Jack. Yeah. Seven slashing damage, Jack, as you take this cut across your shoulders. My skin glows white and the platinum ring slows the blade down and, you know, prevents some of the damage. Red, it's your turn. You hear the tightening of a bowstring from the tree as Red takes aim at the back of this

one's head, the one that has been cursed by Craylot. I am going to, as a bonus action cast Hunter's Mark to add a D6. I'm going to be using my regular D8 plus a colossus slayer. I'm going to use my inspiration to roll with advantage. And as it takes this shot at Jack and you see the flash of its long sword in the firelight as it attacks your friend, you let the arrow loose. 16 a hit. That hits. Oh, yeah. Nice.

Do some dams. Yeah. Damn him up. Or we go the other way. Do some midge. Really midge them up. 52 damage. Yeah, that's a nice number.

All right, yeah. So it takes all 52 points of damage. And I'll roll again without advantage just to see what hits. This time I will not use my sharpshooter penalty. Nice. Yeah, 23. That hits. 11 damage.

Good midge. Such good. Emma. Stupid. Doren, your combat training allowed you to dispatch this undead creature in front of you. Not even on your turn. It is your turn now. What do you want to do?

Doreen, don't get close to us. Just wait till after me. I got a good shot out of, Dorn, if you want to give me a turn. I listen, I hear Rob shout out and I know what's going on. Fuck. It's Jack. Jack's his name. It's just in the forest.

Hey guys. You didn't have a guy? I hear Jack shout out. So I point over at Red in the tree. And I say, Red, take your aim and shoot at this foul dead bastard. And I use my commander's strike to advise you to ask. had a full D8 damage to win. Nice.

Oh, yeah. Rock and roll. I will not be rolling this with the penalty. All right. That was a natural one. Oh, come. This is fine, because guess what? I rolled a one on every die I rolled.

I rolled a one on the D20, a one on the D-6. Is that all one set? You got a shame that set. For shame. You need to just burn the house down. Hold on. I also rolled two natural 20s this game so far on this die. Did you say we should burn the hose down?

Yeah, a fucking hose down. Bad luck. It's not just the die. These die needed to get rid of it. It was further than that. Well, that's sucked. Sorry, Dawn and I missed. Jack, it's your turn.

What happens now? I was thinking of Kremloth. Jack takes the glowing orb in his hand kind of like a football and puts it next to Kralath's chest and, like, gets him in a bear hug. And then they both explode in a shower of light. It's a huge thunderous boom as we get the fuck out of this place where we're surrounded by undead nights

and leave an explosion of radiant light in our wake. Cool. So that would be some constitution saving throws for DC-15. And we're going to move, where do you want to move to? Kraylath, we get 300 feet from wherever you are. I can show you the world. Let's go to...

300 feet off the mat. I'm rolling rocks tonight. I would say not too far away. I mean, yeah, to the north. and we'll have like a consistent front against them. Yeah. So all of the undead creatures pass their saves and both of the horses fail. No.

Wow. How much damage do you deal? 42. Hell yeah. So that's 21 to our saves. No more level one spell slots. That's no good. I like those ones.

Damn it. Both of the horses just explode in a shower of horse blood. Smell that? Smells like horse blood. You hate horses. Krayloth, it's your turn. All right. So, um, Krayloth now back in a different section of the forest reorient himself and takes a couple steps towards these last few.

And he's going to cast sacred flame on the one that is closest to him that has already taken some damage. Excellent. I'm going to make a deck save for you. Yes, you are. 14 DC. Hmm, that's an 8. That is going to take some damage then. 2D.8.

Ooh, an eight and a one, the extremes. So that is nine radiant damage. What does it look like when you barbecue this fool? Fuck yeah. I, oh yeah, he's just lit up in this beautiful radiant white flame, and he kind of staggers around a little bit before his bones collapse. And the flame kind of lifts into the sky a little bit. Like there's like a, ah.

Ooh, I like that. Cool. As the flame lifts up. Cool. Barry. Kralov, these two remaining creatures both pull their. bow's back off of their shoulders and aim at you. Bring it.

Both of them miss as they fire into the darkness at your form. I love that. Yeah, you just use the shield and just deflect these arrows. Fred, it's your turn. I'm going to aim at one of them. That sounds so determined. Which one? The one I want to hit.

All right, the one I want to hit. I'm going to do this without the sharpshooter penalty to start. 22? Yeah. 18 damage. Great. Nice. You're going to take another shot?

Nice. Yeah, I rolled really well. Cool. This time I will use my sharpshooter penalty. Flap flutter planarly, which probably won't hit 14. Yes, it does. Ah! Ah!

19 damage. Good. The arrows sing out of the trees. Zfunk. Doren, you watch as your friend Jack and Kralov. Just, whoa. Duran darts across the ground. Duran darts towards these guys in attacks.

Like, what am I trying to say here? I don't know. I move an attack. I move here. I attack them in front of them. I like your vocabulary. With a... Axe time.

14 to hit. Yes. 13 damage. Marvelous. And then a second attack doing 18 to hit. and nine more damage. Yeah, and as you just swing your axe at this creature, you're chopping off these big hunks of rotten flesh

and you just follow the ground with a noise. Nice. Jack, it's your turn. Jack's fired up. He's got this orb. It's wrapped in chains and got dangling dog tags from it, and he's going to issue forth from it another sphere of radiant light to explode slightly behind these two,

such that the final wave of light that comes back. stopped just short of singeing Doren's beard but catches these two undead creatures in its wake. For sure. Let's be real. He's a little singed. Well, I mean, it's tanned, actually. He's quite brown at the end of this. Dexterity saves. He smells really bad. He's actually already brown-skinned. Yeah, he is.

Doren's always described himself as darker skin. What's the Dex? Is it a Dexiever? Fifteen decks. They both fail. 40 damage. Wow. Awesome. Wow. Those are some D-6s. Blammo.

They are. Krayloth, you see the undead creature in front of Doren just take this massive damage. The other one beside it, similarly crisping. What do you do? Kralov is going to run forward. Full heartily. Towards the one, yep, full run towards the, not the one that Doren is engaging, the other one. Sure.

Mm-hmm. And he is going to try to get its attention. and say, you got an easy opening, red, and he's going to use the help action. Cool. I'll give a red advantage on the next attack. You approach this undead creature that just reeks to high heaven

of singed, rotten flesh. Make a wisdom saving throw as it stares at you on your approach. Right, right, right. You see this corpse now up close. Part of its skull is blown clean open and you can see clear through to rotten brain. Well, that's pretty disturbing.

I did actually get a 10 on my saving throw, so I might not clinch it. You have become paralyzed. Oh, okay. Rendering your help unuseful to your friend Red. No. You say that still. You're like, I'll help you red.

Then you just go paralyzes fall over. You just stand there. He doesn't go prone. Actually, Kraylaw, it's better if you don't stand in the way. It's tough to aim around your head, bud. It's not tough for you. You can fucking hit anything you want. So the one creature just paralyzes you with its terrifying visage.

And then the other creature tries to hit you, Doren, with its long sword. Sure, sure. Natural 20. Oh, no. Is your ability based on your being able to not be paralyzed? So if I'm not allowed to take reactions. That's right. then that 20 connects.

That 20 stands. You get one, Joe. You get one. You get one. This is your one chance. Thank you, everyone. Couldn't pick a better person. I'm so pleased.

Do not miss your chance to blow. It's opportunity. Comes the ones in a lifetime, Joe. Spaghetti. I just want to talk about how happy I am now to roll. The spaghetti on your spaghetti already. 15 slashing damage. 15.

That's right. Nothing. Hey. Hey. I mean, way to go. So good. Red, you watch as Dorn takes this mighty blow. And I'm going to do this one first with a sharp shooter penalty.

Daddy 20. Oh! That's the one in front of Kralath? Yes. It's a good thing I helped you. 24 damage. Nice. And I'm going to do it again without the sharp shooter penalty this time.

14 damage. Nice. Can I roll some? something on them to see if they are not taking my damage in a particular way? Sure. Yeah, roll perception. 17? Yeah, it seems like maybe they're regenerating.

I mean, you attacked trolls previously that had kind of a similar quality where you dealt damage to a creature and then the next time you looked at them, you're like, oh, wait. I thought they were bleeding from that arrow hole. Now they're not anymore. Doran, it's your turn. I'm going to attack full-fledged with a 26 to hit. and doing 16 damage. Great.

On the one in front of me. And then I swipe again, doing a 21 to hit and 14 damage. Yeah, you hack it to pieces. All right. Hack, hack, hack, hack, hack, hack, hack. Jack, it's your turn. Yeah, Jack is going to step forward a little bit. He's got his spear in his hand.

And this time, it's going to light on fire in his hand and then almost roll out like a bowling ball around until it's this big, five-foot flaming sphere that's that's right behind the the monster that's behind kralath so there's this ball of fire behind him uh so dexterity saving throw 15 or take some fire damage that fails 14 this big sphere of bail fire starts to cook that creature for eight fire damage kralath it's your turn you're standing in front of a creature that's standing in front of some fire okay kralov is going to try to snap out of it. That is

a 13. You fail. Oh, my goodness. Yeah, you continue to be paralyzed. I think that Kralath is seeing a former squad member in this. Ooh, interesting. An old friend of his named Jackson.

And every now and then, this shambling corpse turns in a way, whips of hair floating in a way without similar to Jackson. And he's trying to get ready to swing his mace at it and he keeps on hesitating. Okay. It's the

creature's turn. It's going to attack you with a critical hit automatically because you are paralyzed. Yes, it is. Deals 14 slashing damage to you, Kralath. And then as you take this painful blow, you are

restored so you are no longer paralyzed. Okay, good to know. Nice. Red, it's your turn. You watch as your paralyzed friend just gets totally macerated with this evil long sword. Greyloff, no!

It's okay. I'm fine. We're still in this. The thing ended its turn within five feet of my sphere? It did. I would like another dexterity saving through then. You certainly can have one. That's five.

I rolled 10 damage as the fires of the flaming sphere continue to cook this creature. Mm-hmm. Red, it's your turn. And then I say, Kralov, no! And I reminisce about the days when Kralong used to go down like 50 fucking times. Almost nostalgic, right? Yeah. And then I go, ah, actually, he's not even down yet.

This is barely a serious battle. And I take aim and I shoot at the fucking thing. True. 14? Yeah, you hit. 14 damage. Great. Yes.

Good shot. Nicely done, Red. 21 to hit? Yeah. 15 damage. Nice. Doren, you see these arrows just puncture the creature. Doren gets right up next to him and attacks this foul beast with a 14 to hit.

I'm just on that cusp every time, eh? 13 damage. What does it look like when you kill the final undead creature? Yes. Team awesome boys! My axe drives in one of the arrows that Red had already shot in it, drives it through it. Team awesome boys, yes. And as you stand weapons in hand, breath panting out of your lungs

and these ragged gasps looking around in the darkness, these corpses just mangled and smoking. The mist that had gathered around your ankles through the woods disappears and you are alone. I'm sure we won't see them again. Thanks to our wonderful Patreon supporters, Christopher Ryan Evans, Mitchell Cadwell, Colin Burckhardt, Daniel, Doug, Katie Orrett, and Merlin. See you soon. Uh, I'm going to do that math right now.

Do it. Do the math. Do it. Do it now. Do it out Do it To the bath To the math Do the math

To the math To the bath To the bath To the math To the bath To the math Ah Uh

Do it To the ma'a-a-a-ma-a-ma-a-ha To-Hoo-Hoo-H To-E To-E O-O-U-O-the-Mah-A-ha-ha To-E Oh, ooh, ooh, uh, uh, ma-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-2.

Hell yeah, so that's 21 to our saves. But Fender's Light, you will no longer curse me.