Dice Shame - 70 | 'Close to the Chest'

Episode Date: February 11, 2021

Things get serious as the party struggles to navigate a very sensitive situation... Comedy, action and a whole lot of shaming come together in Dice Shame, an Actual Play Podcast of Storm King's Thunder by Wizards of the Coast! Join our GM Jo; her partner Harlan, his brother Alex & their best friends Justin and Rob as they tackle the daunting world of Faerun in this legendary adventure module! Dice Shame is a podcast that welcomes its audience to the gaming table. Like the games they play at home, they try not to take themselves too seriously. The show aims to be entertaining, inclusive, and irreverent, while still taking the rules (somewhat) seriously. Join us every Thursday morning for brand new episodes available on all major platforms including; Spotify, iTunes, Google Play and more! If you haven't checked it out yet... what are you waiting for?!? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Tell me your level. I'll see that tan gold. Um, so we're down $3,000. God's damn, the world needs more people like you. What is this? A book? Fighting giants. It feels good. Can I borrow a set of dice? I said I meant no disrespect, and I meant no disrespect.

Cranlaw, if I get the impression that these dwarves... Wait, one second. Taste this. Yeah. I still admire you, and I thank you for what you've done. Have you never seen a giant? They're not 80 feet tall. I mean, some of them are. Ha, ha, smart ass. Welcome back to Dice Shame, episode 70, close to the chest.

MVP this week goes to The Hymbo from Limbo on Twitter for their kind words. Thank you so much. Thanks. Dungeons and Pop is a variety show-style podcast with different campaigns that are released in an arc style. If you want to hear PCs hanging out in a pizza parlor for two episodes, check them out. Also, if you're looking for a chance to... to play some RPGs with our lovely community. We're hosting InvictusCon 2021 over the last weekend in March.

Check out our website or social media for all the details. www. www.dyshamepodcast.com. All right. Should we do this? Ah, yeah. Let's do it. It's just beautiful outside.

We've got a fresh blanket of snow here in the Toronto area. I love it. It's chilly. We had a snowball fight. Did you? Yes, we did. Oh, my God. I think it's kind of nice to be playing D&D in a season that matches the in-game season.

Yes. There's something about, like, looking outside while you're role-playing and seeing the snow covering the ground. It definitely makes me want to stay home. Do you know what's coming up? Valentine's Day. Valentine's Day, that's right. Now, Cupid is a ranger. No way.

He's got a bow. Yeah, but I think fighters can have bows. Lots of things could have bows. You think Cupid's a fighter? Yeah, Cupid is a fighter Just a big stupid fighter That's the big stupid fighter That's the

It's a big stupid fighter Cupid No, Cupid's thing Isn't shooting a bow He's not like expert at perception Or anything like that He's, it's all about charming people So he's some sort of

That's right It's bard I guess But doesn't half the time Cupid's arrow goes wide And it hits somebody They don't expect And then there's a whole shenanigan That has to happen

Yeah so they're a terrible archer That's like Shakespeare version of Cupid Okay, but Justin's right, charmed. So it could be barred. It could be like a bard with range. Could be cleric. Could be arcane archer.

Can clerics charm? Yeah. Clerics can charm prison at level two, I think. Trickster cleric. They're a trickster cleric. Oh, trickster clerics. Gotcha. Does that mean like the Easter bunny is really like

some sort of magician in... No, Easter bunny is a wear druid. They're like a wear rabbit. I'm here to spring. Obviously. The Easter bunny is a weird. rogue. St. Patrick is a halfling cleric, right?

Or paladin maybe, saint, because it's like religious. Yeah, yeah, true. High constitution. High con. Highland. Great drinking. And the tooth fairy is your son, Henry. Oh, yeah, that's true.

He wants to be when he grows up. Oh, that's a fun job. Yeah. It's really sad because he's like, Dad. Grandpa wants me to be an engineer, but I don't want to be a tooth fairy. I want to be a tooth fairy. He was crying.

Oh, no. I mean, it's not so bad. This is the real-life equivalent of, I wanted to be a dentist. Yeah, for real. Do you think Santa is like a wizard or a warlock? Or what class is a... He's a fay creature.

I think he's definitely one of those, like, you could have a warlock, a fay warlock dedicated to Santa with the spirit of Christmas. Is it like a fay artificer? Artificer? Yeah, like he induced... No, because then that would mean... that the toys we get are magic and they're not. That's wrong.

They are. They're super magic. Now, what is he? I think he's just a normal guy. I think he's a human fighter. Santa's a fighter. He's just retired. He's got a lot of time on his hands.

He's a monk. He's obviously a bard. A bard? Yeah. Oh, you know what? Maybe he's a bard without an instrument. Like he's an eloquence bard or something. Oh, maybe.

He's going to town. But he definitely does have like, a mystical spiritual aura, you know, like when you roll a constitution save or be charmed for 10, 10 rounds or something like that, you know? Or be holly jelly. He does have high constitution. All of the cookies and milk that he eats. I mean, his bones are incredibly dense. He's just big bone. Oh. No, I think maybe he's a druid. He's got animal companions with the reindeer, right? Yeah, good point. He's a druid. I think he's an Arctic druid. Dwarf. Of toys. Maybe he's a frost giant. Speaking of Santa

And that too fair Non sequitur Here's a segue Here's a segue Let's do it again Here's a segue The town of Jalenthar Is a strange sight to behold

The majority of the homes and buildings Are dug into the ground Emerging half-crowned with dirt mounds And planted over with grasses and shrubs Looking like a pod of whales breaching through the surface of a winter ocean. The raucous noise of dwarven drinking song echoes from somewhere, accompanied by the aggressive sound of breaking glass. Doran, this is a hero of the war that you fought in, someone who you knew both by reputation and by his deeds on the

battlefield. Falling snowflakes land on his bare chest and melt into water droplets that hang from his plentiful dwarven chest hair. He's solidly built, totally ripped with muscles, but less like a bodybuilder, more like an athlete. His golden breastplate discarded somewhere. He's only partly armored with a richly embroidered skirt,

gold greaves, heavy boots, and vambraises. Not only did he help lead your battalion to victory, but he was a war hero renowned in the lands by your brethren, by

most dwarves who still drew breath after the battles. Doran's eyes go wide as the flashback plays in his mind. I can't say I'm not incredibly pleased to see you. Do you remember the last time we met? He like puts a hand down on the roof and hops down off, surprisingly nimble and strikes out a hand to meet yours. Can't say that I do, but it's nice to see a friendly dwarf in face. Too many of those around me are drunk with the spoils.

And Red shoots a look to Krayalath and Jack, like, what the fuck? Like, this is the bad guy. What do you mean, it's been a pleasure to see you? Like, just totally flabbergasted the three of us, expecting you to chew him out. And you're like shaking the guy's hand. Captain, Nur girl, Chaos Hammer. I'm out of loss for words, because when we approached, I didn't know who I was expecting to meet. I'm pleased that it's you, such a respectable and known figure.

These are my companions. This is a Tabaxi warrior. He's incredible with his bow. His name is Red. Hi. I'll explain in a minute. This tall man here, this is Kraloth. He's incredibly wise and strong and very powerful with his clerical skills.

Cleric skills. He's great up paperwork. Not so much. What is this? A book? And this powerful. mage is Jack Page. Gentlemen, this, this captain, I fought alongside in the last great wars of this land. You don't recall, but you saved my life. Oh, iron hammer. Iron fist. Yes, you honor me with

your flattery kinsman. Please be welcome here. Well, I wish welcome is what we came looking for. I'm ready to follow Doran's lead here. I'm a, the eyebrow raised. Yeah, Red's a bit like flabbergasted. Jack's going to try and get Red's attention and be like close to the chest, right? That's how we're playing this. Right, right. And he sort of swallows hard.

Captain, I'd like a word with you in private. Have you got quarters here? Yeah, of course. Come on in. And he leads you into the keep that he had just been repairing the ceiling of. As you enter, it's clear this is a really rough-shodd building. In fact, he was not the first to name, a shield to create this ramshackle roof there's like old weapons and shields all kind of just plastered together along with some strange corrugated iron sheeting and he leads the four of you into this building and uh the dwarves on the outside sort of nod at him as he enters but otherwise show him no salute or deference to his rank and he sort of gestures oh i'm sorry we don't have

furniture here but uh the floor will do for me if it'll do for you listen i'm a bit taken aback that your your infantry show you no respect no salute these are tired men and i don't require of them to be honest these are different times than they used to be to not ask simple respect from warriors below you i mean i'll be honest it looks a little weak and i mean that with all due respect that may be doran that may be i digress we share in similar Cray, you see. We too have been taking down giants. Well, that is fine game to hunt, my friend. They are.

Very fine game. But you see, we are approaching it from a different perspective altogether. And Crayloff leans forward, and he says, we did see how you guys were taking down these giants, and I gotta say I'm awfully curious.

How were you luring the giants to you? These farmsteads are perfect places to create traps for hill giants, especially them being, and I'm sure you know, the greediest of the giant kind. They're lured to livestock like bees to honey. So you procure the farmhouse, you get some livestock, you lay it out, and then you just wait. That's it.

Any chance they're running from Gredhog now that Chief Goz dead? Don't know anything about that. Mainly just dealing them on a first come, first serve basis. We mostly are serving death. Do you happen to know, do the, do the giants have a den here nearby, or... I don't have enough dwarves at my disposal for there to be like a squadron of scouts or anything. Do you have information about a hive of giants? Recently, the hill giant location down south, south of Goldenfield, was taken out.

It was, it was destroyed. We defeated Chief Gah. Yes. Well, I would buy you a drink, but there's no tavern here, so... you'll have to just accept my praise. I mean, I guess not if you hadn't kicked out the people running it. Do I detect a note of... Passive aggressiveness.

We're reaching the point. This was the subtle approach. Oh, no, Jack's shitty at it. Yeah. I think Kralath is going to step in again and say, it seems interesting for your tactic. You see, here you are. You are clearly fine hunters.

And you want to take down the biggest game. These giants are massive, they're threatening foes, and you've been able to take them down at every stop you've gone to. You have a very skilled band. If you're so talented, which I know you are. We saved those people. Yesterday they cried because of us, because we put them out of their houses,

but they'll weep sorry your tears. After being met by giants, I promise you. Of course. They're alive, thanks to you. Those giants would have come either way as long as they had life. They're well on their way to safety. of city walls and guards. Can I just say that I love the juxtaposition

between flattering a wizard and trying to flatter a dwarf? Because it's so clear the dwarf's like, what the fuck you're talking about? It's really cool. We've only begun to meet the tide of this terrible evil. King Harnoth would have us sit idly by

at the citadel and watch the wave of giant's crest overall Fayroon before attempting to mop up the aftermath, but I refuse to allow your folk to take the brunt of this wave. I am a tidebreak not some scavenger.

Aye. Let us end this before it truly begins. Aye. And I pull up my fist and I give him a props, you know. Yeah, he fist bumps you. Doran, you know war. Let us together circumvent this genocide. A farmhouse will not prevent the morbid persistence of a giant.

Let the country folk flee to the cities while they still have time. Now don't you feel that maybe there is a way to go about it without being so forceful, throwing people out of house and home. I mean, these giants that plague the land are also going between the people that are heading towards these walls. We are soldiers, Tabaxi, not diplomats. We do what we know best. We get people out of harm's way, and we take care of the threats.

And your king sanctions this. No. Nurgrel, I need to say this. You're giving us a bad name. They don't deserve this. And yet here you are, like a bandit, like sands. some sort of, nar-girl, you're ruining the regard that we've built for ourselves when we won the wars of this great land. Let us take on these giants together. Let us go to them, take the war

to them, destroy their home, not the other way around. No, Doran, I can either sit in the citadel at my king's bidding and do nothing and wait and see and hold my breath, or I can come out here on the plains and address the giants where they hunt. How many giants have you killed? They number in the dozens now, friend. And how many farmhouses have you destroyed? How many families have you put out of their homes? This is bigger than home.

He's 100% right. I don't love all these people losing their homes because I think ultimately everybody here is trying to save people. But fuck, it must be frustrating for King Harnoth to be holding you back when what should do best as fight giants out in the field. God's damn, the world needs more people like you. Thank you, wizard. Children like this have never seen war. They don't know what's coming. And yes, we may have made refugees of them sent them for the safety in the walls of the city, but at least they're free to run now, with roads unspoiled by hordes of orcs and rocks from the sky. They don't even know what they're running from yet. But right now they're free to run.

We need information. Yes. We've got pieces of this picture. more pieces of the puzzle than you do. And, you know, I'm hoping we can leave this meeting trying to fill in the gaps and trying to sketch the bigger piece of the puzzle because we need folks like you. We need folks like you to be talking to the folks in Waterdeep and to be talking to the Harper's and Everland

and to be working together to defeat these giants because no one of you alone are going to do it. If we could meet tomorrow and try and come up with a plan where we can work together, and at the end of the day, we've set a little fund up for the refugees back in Everland, if at least tell them to go see the baker. He smiles, wryly, and nods.

As if that means something. Whatever happens, I still admire you and I thank you for what you've done years ago on my behalf and for our kin. I just hope that we can attain the grace and honor that we've worked so hard to build. Would that be so, Doran? Would that be so? And he leads you all back out into the sunlight. Doren, you can honestly think that this guy is someone to follow. I mean, look at them. Besides looking gorgeous, I mean.

It's that chest hair, I tell you. I believe you, to an extent I agree. But this is like stopping a boulder from running down a hill. It's very difficult to do, especially he's got all these dwarves to back him. I think the only way that we can really possibly have any chance here is to simply guide which direction the boulder goes in, so to speak. I agree. He's a weapon.

We just need to aim him in a direction that's productive. You think you can aim him, red points, at this, like, flowing-haired, barrel-chested dwarf, who's, like, in a beam of sunlight. He's carrying this golden hammer, this weapon with such ease, like, practiced, you know? I mean, his heart's in the right place. We heard him. He wants to do good. He doesn't want to sit around because King Harnoth tells him to.

He wants to figure out where the giants are and punch him in the lip. And I think, you know, that's a productive impulse. Just, you know, less destroy the countryside and disrupt all the people and scorched earth it. That's the part we got to tamp down a little. I know strong personalities and they're not easy to persuade. Red sort of makes a look towards Jack and then towards Crayloth and then towards Doran.

But I mean, can this force even be wielded at all? Are they, are they an army? Are they more of just a group of bandits, as Doran said? You can roll insight if you'd like. Happily. I'm going to roll with my brand new official red dice that I got for Christmas a long time ago. Nice.

By hummingbird dice. And they rolled me a 22. Fuck yeah. Hey, not bad. So you see them, and they are drinking. There are some tankards of ale lying around on the roof of this house. And as you watch and you pass by tailing Captain Chaos Hammer, one of the dwarf shoves the other dwarf, and they get in a bit of a tussle.

It seems to you that they want to fight no matter what. Whether they're fighting giants or each other, there's definitely, a lot of simmering aggression in this crew. Yeah, and Red just turns back to Jack and just like, look, if you think that we can guide this boulder, he says just stream to Doran, then I'm all for it. But I feel like you're going to have to put up a convincing argument to make these people follow any sort of plan. Yeah, I mean, I've seen this before.

If these dwarves weren't led by Chaos Hammer, I would think them no different than bandits. Let's not lose sight of that. you come to the outskirts of the town where a squadron of four well-armed dwarves is waiting at lazy ease near the entrance where the two hill giant heads decorated on pikes stand on either side of the road in their midst five men stand three humans one halfling one elf they're uncomfortable looking all around the town at the dwarven occupants And Captain Chaos Hammer is already interrogating these dwarves when you come upon the scene, trailing after him. And where did you find these captives again? Yes, all right.

Well, bring them in. And this crew of dwarven soldiers begins moving these humanoids into the center of town. And he nods at you guys as you come up on his rear. Lauren looks at Jack, Kraloth, and Red, and with a knowing glance, jogs up and catches Captain Nurgirl. Kind of continues to walk with him. What's going on here? These captives, they don't look like dangerous folks. What's going on?

What are you doing? These men were found alongside some other townsfolk in a cave system northwest of town. They volunteered to help us clear the area of giant activity. I wonder, Captain, if I could bend your ear for another moment. And I kind of wave back to my companions to catch up with me. Sure, yeah. So he pauses in the middle of the road and waves his retinue of guards on into the center of town ahead of him. You know, in sort of a way I want to show Captain Nurgirl the advantages that he might have with us.

So, you know, Doran turns to Jack and says, hey, Jack, pull up that map of the ear girl. area if you don't mind. Jack snaps his fingers and a map is projected in between us. And I make it as big and as fancy as I can. So it's really like five feet by five feet showing as much of the area as I can. And as we, and just sort of having it zoom in, showing our whole adventure and then coming down to this like just the spot where we are now. Yeah. Can I roll insight to see if he's impressed at this? Sure. Dirty 20. Dirty 20? Yeah. He nods in appreciation but isn't like, Whoa, wizardry, you know. This is a man who's older than all of you.

You see him nod and appreciation, and he kind of like dry washes his hands a little bit, maybe out of impatience. Right. And that's when Doran turns to red and he says, now red, within the five mile radius of here, are there any humanoids that you might pick out to be of giant size? Red rolled in sight, which means red is aware that he's not impressed. Unimpression. Yeah, yeah.

But Red is kind of like, yeah, well, you know, we definitely have an idea of how many creatures could be around. Dora, it'll take me a minute, though. So Red lays on the ground for a full minute. And Chaos Hammer is like looking over his shoulder at his guards, moving deeper into the city. He's like, is there anything else here? Captain, please use us as you will. Let us show our prowess in battle when the Giants come. Wizard.

create a map of the town. Done. There are some men here, keeping watch. I've got four on patrol. There's another option. My magic can move an awful lot of dirt. And maybe I'll even snap my fingers and have a five feet pile of dirt appear beside me

from a whole, you know. We can build a berm or a wall or something defensible awfully quickly if we've got some time before they show up. Is there somewhere you'd think is more defensible that we'd like to build a bit of an embattlement. Now that's what I like to hear. Some real strategy.

All right. And he starts laying out on the map with one stubby finger exactly where he would love a trench to be dug. Done. It's kind of in a semi-circle around this keep in the center. I'm going to have the captives on top of the keep. Chaos, hammer. I'm a pretty sharp eye.

If you'd permit me, I'd love to be in a place, maybe center town, and I could be attacking anything that might be coming. Excellent. Archer, then. You stay on top of the keep with the captives. That red light kind of beams a little, looking at the other. It's like, I have a job too, guys. I have some ways to keep your men alive. If you put me on the front line, I can keep them protective from the giants.

If we can have this trench dug to the south of the keep, the road comes in north here. We're going to have most of the men stationed toward the north. You can be there, Cleric. And I mean no disrespect, Chaos Hammer. But you said that these dwarves are soldiers. But I still haven't seen any one of these soldiers show any form of respect to their leader.

We need to rally your soldiers. Put us all on the same page. Put us all in the same mindset. Just because you say no disrespect, Doran Iron Fist, doesn't mean that none is taken. These are men whose abilities are tested by many decades on the battlefield, under my command.

And just because they're not done talking yet, young Doran, iron fist. And that's when Doran also gets confrontational and steps right up nose to nose with Nergirl. And he continues. He's like spitting on your face a little bit as he's yelling. He's like, just because you haven't seen these men in battle doesn't mean they're not going to swing circles around you on the battlefield. I said I meant no disrespect and I meant no disrespect. Then stop spitting on my face.

Well, I only do it out of respect, Chaos Hammer. And he clangs his axe against his chest plate. When I say rally, I mean rally. How are the other dwarves that are standing around reacting to this? You look around red and you see all eyes on you. No one has moved around to encircle you or anything, but everyone who is sitting on the top of a house, on the top of the keep, they're all watching.

I think I tapped Doran. I'm like, Doran, Doran. No, no, but I... And I'll follow you, Chaos Hammer. I will. I should hope so. I feel eyes on me, and I turn, and you all should too. This isn't just any dwarf, and I raise my axe, and I'm pointing around at all the other dwarves that are watching us, and I point at Chaos Hammer.

This is not just a dwarf. This is Captain Nergeral Chaos Hammer. And I say we raise arms and stand beside him, not as rabble, but as one. Who's with me? Captain Chaos Hammer turns away from you and starts walking down the road and then he looks back over his shoulder and he says, be ready.

Doren, you shouldn't have done that. I don't think they know what's coming for them. I have a feeling they're underestimating what the giants are going to send. It is what it is. I think it might be up to us to come up with a plan just in case these giants attack on multiple sides.

I can get a five-foot deep trench and a five-foot-high berm in about half an hour. You know, now I've got to move at 10 feet. I can get a 10-foot one in, you know, maybe an hour and a plus. Or given two and a half hours, I can get 15 feet of trench and a 15-foot berm for us to stand behind in like two and a half hours. Let's move some dirt. Let's move some dirt. Rob's done some quick math. I think Red sort of hangs back with Kraloth and says, look at these men.

I mean, they've killed giants. We've killed giants. I mean, this isn't golden fields, despite what it looks like. These aren't famas. These are, and I would imagine, are these, like, level seven-ish? Like, are they of our ilk, or are they weaker? You can roll persuasion. Persuasion.

I'm sorry. You can roll perception. Tell me your level. Persuading the G. Okay, can I just say these fucking red dice have all rolled above 12 so far. There you go. Nice. 20, dirty 20.

So these orc, these orc, these, uh, secret orcs. So these dwarves look battle-hardened. They are covered in scars very similar to the way that Doren has scarred forearms, scars on his face now from the devil that he fought. These are dwarves that have seen some significant battle. They do seem a little bit weary, a little bit less alert than you. you all are, maybe less aware of the threat that is going to accost to them. They also don't have any kind of magical equipment. They're very basically outfitted. They have great axes and heavy crossbows sort of nearby. And yeah, Red says to Kralath, maybe they don't know what's

in store for them, but this is different. This is a group that has a plan. For better or worse, They have a lure, they have an idea where they took over this town to do this. I feel like this is one situation where following their lead might be beneficial for us. No, no, I agree with you completely. I simply think that there is some hubris here. Maybe we should take a poke around just in case, you know, while we're waiting on this time. I'd like to sort of see some of these dwarves in their action moving about. See if we can't sniff out any other hubris.

And on the hubris point, I agree. I think hubris is on both parts here. I think we came in this thinking that we were going to be the biggest fish in this pond, and it's very clear that we are the smallest. Indeed. And Kralath is standing. He's petting his new black tressum. I was wondering what you were doing.

Good Jackson. All right. Well, let's take a poke around. Lead the way. Doran is already kind of walking in the direction of where he might believe there's a... Is there a blacksmith? or some form of a sharpening wheel? Yeah, so one of these hovels,

if you poke your head into a number of different dwellings, one of them has a series of chimneys on the top of it, and inside you find a rudimentary forge. All Doran's going to do is cleaning up his own weaponry. He's going to sharpen Ork Splitter. That tickles. Caught me by surprise entirely. I was not expecting Ork Splitter.

Yeah. And maybe there's like several little things that Doran fixes upon his own armor and he comes out looking almost polished. Jack, you spend the next number of hours digging this trench and building a berm. Jack's really excited to throw his mind into a technical challenge because his thoughts are really worried about Torin. This whole situation that he knows he's out of his depth to try and influence people. So he's he's all about like, okay, let's build a big trench. we're going to put a wall of dirt on the other side of it. We'll sort of step it back so people can man it. I think once you start building the berm beyond eight to 10 feet tall,

chaos hammer's like, what are you doing? The giants need to be able to see the bait. That's the whole point. Wizard, were you not listening? Yeah. Well. Have you never seen a giant? They're not 80 feet tall.

I mean, some of them are. You haven't seen those ones? Smart ass. Just kind of shakes his head. If the bait needs to be taller, we can sort that out too. Yes. As Red and Kralath are sort of moving throughout the encampment, I don't think our usual tactics about blowing smoke up his ass

or even being confrontational necessarily work for him. He's definitely someone who values strength and power. But I think part of the reason that all of this rabble don't really pay him much mind might be because of that same sort of experience. He's a hero for sure, but not one that seems to need the limelight. Well, he may not be coming from a place of balance in this, but maybe we'll learn a thing or two from them. And Krayloth has stopped and has started setting up a little fire and a big pot,

and he's throwing some stuff in for soup. As you start setting up this cook fire, Krayloth, One of the knights comes up to you. He's like, oh, so you're making some food, are you? Oh, yeah, I just looked around and thought you guys might be good with some warm soup in your bellies. Nothing that a dwarf likes more than having some warm soup. We've got some rations with us. Do you mind if we bring them over?

Yeah, please do, please do. Chaos Hammer asked us to do this, make sure the troops were fed. Well, that's a good plan, can't fight on an empty seat. stomach and all that. All right. Just just hold your horses. And he goes off and returns with some food. Kralov nods to red and acknowledges. Okay. He understands. He brings a sledge with some boxes on it, some wooden crates. Roll perception for me. Okay. I got an 11. All right. As you're prying open some of these crates with the dwarf, You recognize that some of these boxes are trade boxes.

One of them is marked for Everland as a destination. So they're not only putting people out of their homes, but they're stealing trade food as well. And actually, one of the other crates, something a little bit smaller, but it's containing cured bacon, like cured meats. It's marked for Citadel Feldbar. Giving sort of a nod to Kralath, like playing at Koi, Red's just like, oh, these were from Everland. I guess you guys needed some extra food, eh? Well, it's hungry work. Of course, of course. How did you go about grabbing this one?

The river's just there. Trade boats come up and down all the time. We just take what we need. Right. Chaos Amor is a smart leader. Nothing smarter than keeping your army fed. You have to do what you have to do. Obviously, you let the trade caravan go, the people. who were driving in. Well, if you've got this one...

Oh, this is Kralath, and I'm red. Wonderful. If you've got the food, Kralov, would you like to play some dice, red? Sure. Of course. Wouldn't say no to a little dice? So we leave Kralath slicing up

thick pieces of bacon and onions to put into this soup for the troops. And I kind of, as the dwarf heads forward, I sort of hang back a second and I'm like, I'm going to see whatever I can get, but I'll play it real cool, don't worry, and I continue on. Yeah.

Red comes back fully nude, lost all of the gold. Um, so we're down $3,000. Yeah. If you'd like, we can actually do some gambling here. Ooh. Sure. So this is a mini game and anyone who's interested in coming by can come and play. Wow.

I know that Jack is busy playing in the dirt and Doran is sharpening his weapons, but there's always some time for dice. And the best part is, you know, Red has the bag of holding with everything in it. So he's definitely the most trustworthy to keep. Right, so he can put everything on the line here. He's never told you guys a single lie. Yeah. How do we play?

You have three opponents who are sitting on the dirt basically drinking together. They're all dwarves. And they have dice. You watch them for a round maybe just to get a feel for the game. You see that they have these dicing cups and they're rolling bones, D-6s. Nice. They have four in a cup and they roll them and then dump the cup out in front of them, keeping them hidden. They pick out one of these four dice and they reveal its number to all of

their gambling buddies. So they're rolling 46. They're picking one out and showing it to everyone. And then it goes around the table, kind of like poker, where you just progress clockwise and everyone bets or decides that they're going to be out of the game. And then once the bets are settled, you reveal your three hidden dice, the person with the highest total wins. Cool. I'm going to... Can I play as an NPC? As an NPC?

I don't think Dora would be down to play Dice right now. Hell yeah, you can absolutely dice as an NPC. Why not, Alex? Cool. So Red, you want to sit in on this game. So Red sits down and he's like, oh, right?

I guess how do I play? And they explain it. It's like, okay, can I borrow a set of dice while I play? I mean, I don't have any. Oh, sure, you can borrow this pair. And what is this dice? Yeah, these are like legit bones.

They're bone dice. made from their it's kind of grizzly there it's why don't you roll nature is there at least one there's got to be at least one tooth in there natural 20 holy shit kidding me these these dice have been rolling so well i think she probably waited them for you literally grisly these are dice made from bare bones oh my god so roll 46 and then Alex and harlan and I will all show what do we got on our D6, I rolled a three on the one I'm showing you. I rolled two on the one I'm showing you. And I rolled a one on the one I'm showing you. And I think maybe we'll just be two dwarves and red playing. I'm going to start by betting 10 gold. 10 gold on this hand. I'll see that 10

gold. 10 gold. 10 gold here. Over to you, cat. Oh, sure. I'll do 10 gold and I'll raise you three. Three more gold. Raise a three. Raise a three. No problem. I'm in. Oh, fine, I'm in. Three gold more. Sure. So the pot's at 39. Show him, boys.

13. I've also got 13. Oh, wow. I only have six. Well, then we split the pot. Well done, guys. Oh, right. Red, you lose 13 gold.

All right, now I get it. Let's try one more time, and Red shakes his dice and throws them down. I got a one, Red says. A two for me. Oh, now I got a six. I guess I'll start that. apart at, well, let's say, 20 gold this time. The dwarf looks back and forth between all of you.

All right, 20 gold. Oh, well, I'm going to raise it to 40 gold. Oh, all right, 40 gold. A little rich for my blood. I'm out. Well, if you're going to put 40, I guess I'll put another 10 in. All right, 10 more gold, and I'm going to raise it again up to 20 more gold. That's 70 for you and 70 for me.

You know what, let's make it, let's make it an even hundred. Whoa. Okay, fine, an even a hundred. I like the way you play. You're not afraid of my six, eh? You know what, I'd like to, why don't we raise it and bet the pair of dice that I'm playing with? They're pretty cool. Okay, but that's my favorite set.

All right, let's do this. So the pot is 220 gold right now. Woof. This is a little crowd gathered around? Let's see what you have. You raised it last. I have 15. Wow.

Oh, damn, I have eight. Oh. I'm trying to bluff you. And red pulls 220 gold forward. And my dice. Hey, the cat took my dice. Wow. Well, thanks, guys.

I stand up with 210 gold and the other two just fuming. I feel robbed. Now you feel jacked. Usually we don't bet that much of money. You're just trying to seem like a big guy, you know. It's your fault. I know. I always do this.

This is why my wife left me. Red stands up and he's like, I feel bad for taking all this money. That's okay. It's just kind of how the game works. Yeah, that's pretty fun. Have you never gambled before? Yeah.

Say, what do you think of Chaos Hammer? He's pretty cool. I mean, got us out of Citadel Adbar, so got that going for him. And I mean, man, he's a war hero. Yeah, but I mean, is that the consensus among everybody? Yeah, it does seem like people don't pay him much mind. Nah, that's just your opinion.

You're an outsider. You don't know how dwarves are. Can I roll insight on that? Sure. 21. Yeah, he's respected because of his battle prowess, his strength, but they're also pretty casual, probably because they have spent a lot of time together, you know?

Cool. So it is just a casual technique. It's more, like, friendly, you know, rather than, like, he's my boss. They respect him for sure, but they don't necessarily, like, bow down to him or defer to him. Yeah. If this escalated to an all-out war,

how would you feel? He thinks for a minute. I could do with the war. Yeah. I wouldn't mind it, frankly. I mean, I'd never thought about it before, but it's kind of nice to feel like I'm needed. Like, I got something to live for and die for.

Yeah, I mean, even if all the giants are done, there's plenty more that you could do. I mean, this town's pretty nice. Yeah. It's nice right now to have a reason to get up in the morning, you know, fighting giants. It feels good. Right. Thanks so much.

And take care. And Red heads back to Kralath and sort of bends down next to him. Kralov, I get the impression that these dwarves want. Well, one second. Taste this. Yeah. And I hold out a soup. And I hold it up to your lips.

Oh, hey, that's pretty good. It always tastes better when it's stolen. Yeah, there was some spices in that, that, from Feldfar. are quite nice spaces too. Jack, by this time, I'm sure you're finished building your wall and you've navigated around to where the fire's at. I'm very proud of it. Maybe a little too proud.

Everyone comes back around. Doran, you smell bacon being cooked. Yeah. Oh, hey, everyone. I won $200 from that dwarf over there. Dollars? Sorry, I want $200 gold from that dwarf over there. Oh.

Hey, everyone, I want 200 gold from that dwarf over there. Really? How much is that in dollars? Yeah. That's incredible. And I got this awesome set of grisly bone teeth dice. Ooh. They got 200 gold just lying around in somebody's pocket.

They could be buying supplies and they're pirating them from the river Rowvin and stealing from places. Oh, you notice. I haven't told you any of that yet. I don't know. And I tell them basically everything Krayloff and I, and I alone have learned so far. You're right. I didn't think about it that way. This, what they're doing.

And I kind of gesture to Doran, what they're doing here. is not sustainable. They're going to consume the land around them and it's just going to bring more and more aggression towards them. Right now it's just the giants, but and I tap on the Citadel

Feldbar crate, it might be more than just giants soon. It sounds like though, Kralov, that's kind of what they want. I talked to a dwarf over there and he said even when the giants are done they would be ready for a war. They need a sense of purpose. They need something.

You hear the sound of a dwarven horn cut through the early evening. And then a voice rising above the town of Jalandhar. Orcs! Orks! Coming from all directions! Two arms! Orks! Oh shit.

Everyone roll from your shit. Ork splitters like, Wee! Things are about to get real. Thank you once again to our wonderful Patreon supporters. Christopher Ryan Evans, Mitchell Cadwell, Colin Burkhart, Daniel, Doug, Katie Orrett, and Merlin. See you soon. Robot.

Robot, beep, beat, like a robot. Beep, boop, beep. Beep, be, boop, beep, boop, beep. Zero, zero, zero, one, zero one, one, zero one, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero. Like a robot.