Dice Shame - 80 | 'Knock Back A Few'

Episode Date: April 22, 2021

Trouble is brewing at the Copper Cup Fest Hall when a few bad apples decide to show up for more than just a drink... Comedy, action and a whole lot of shaming come together in Dice Shame, an Actual Play Podcast of Storm King's Thunder by Wizards of the Coast! Join our GM Jo; her partner Harlan, his brother Alex & their best friends Justin and Rob as they tackle the daunting world of Faerun in this legendary adventure module! Dice Shame is a podcast that welcomes its audience to the gaming table. Like the games they play at home, they try not to take themselves too seriously. The show aims to be entertaining, inclusive, and irreverent, while still taking the rules (somewhat) seriously. Join us every Thursday morning for brand new episodes available on all major platforms including; Spotify, iTunes, Google Play and more! If you haven't checked it out yet... what are you waiting for?!? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Listen here. I haven't been violent yet. This might be the most dice have ever rolled. I might be dead. Kellenvore's got your boy. Take that, you bastard. Kieran, go fly towards the invisible creature. Take a route. I could die here.

Make a saving throw against death. This is free beer here. Get Torrin out of here. I got to get in there. In true Doran fashion, not just once, but a few times. Show us fog cloud. And he turns to red and he says, I'm going to run around back, see if I can get him through the kitchen. Kreleth, this isn't a time for food.

It's all right. I have a plan. Welcome back to Dishame. This is episode 80, knock back a few. MVP this week is Adam Kodega, who tweeted us the other week, thanking us, amongst others, for helping him with his first time GMing. Well done, Adam. We want to hear all about it. If you're enjoying Dyshame or our other shows, the Invictus Stream or malevolent, please consider supporting us on Patreon. We've got rewards for every tier of support.

from guaranteed seats at convention RPG tables to hearing your names as an MPC on the show to insider video content and advanced access to episodes. Take a look. And thanks to everyone who's supported us so far on our journey, none of this would be possible without you. Thank you so much. All right.

Should we get down to business? Blah, blah. that some of you have different habits in terms of maintaining your character sheets. Maintaining? What? No, I have no habits. It's the lack of habits. That's actually kind of true.

I am a big supporter of, like, digital. And I know you and I, Joe, differ on this because you like filling it out with a pen. It's very tactile for me. For me, I'm the total opposite. I like having it completely online. I've even edited the PDF so it sort of suits my needs. Yeah, you customize it.

to form fillable PDF. Oh, yeah. I have like bubbles that I can cross out for counting my, you know, Ranger uses in a day and things like that.

That's me. And then what I do is in my folder of game files slash red-handed Robin, there's like version 1.1, which is level 10, version 1.2, level 15.

And I just constantly update it and then print off the latest copy. Why do you have a level 15 red-handed Robin? Oh, dreaming. He's a little bit beyond you guys. He does his own thing. Those are his aspirations.

Yeah. I should say episode. I usually go episode and level. So I'm like, as of episode 60, this is what Red's doing. When I say that I don't have habits, it's kind of actually accurate because I've just got, so I've got all my numbers and things, and I've got plus threes and stuff and pencils and then added feats, added on. And then I also have just random names written around the page. Tell me what they are. We got Airglass, we got Farah and Turley, we got Shaxel, Avgar.

Jeff. Just like random names. And I also, I don't even have my character level right. It's six and it's crossed out. And then I have seven. Question mark. So, I mean, there's a difference because we were, we started playing in person. And so I had to set it up so that I could bring it in a folder to come and play in person.

And so I do have printed sheets. But I've also got like a word document that's got like titles and, you know, headings and things that's got all my god you know what you gotta know what's in your component pouch versus your regular pouch versus your backpack versus on amicere you you just need to know where your stuff is yeah yeah definitely right you're right about that uh and then i've got a a google photos drive with all my spells and stuff i don't know i it's that's amazing rob that's so cool that's pretty cool it's over the top just like jack yeah no i think that's really really fun. The amount of thought that you put into it is really inspiring, actually. It is. That's a good way

of putting it, Justin. It's inspiring. What are your notes, though? Are your notes, like, do you handwrite or? For a while, I was handwriting them and then, like, trying to transcribe them into something that was in character for the first, like, handful of episodes, because that was a fun way to sort of play while not playing. But I've mostly just gone to handwriting them and putting them in my binder, so I've got a binder full of handwritten notes from all the other stuff. For in my notes, I have just a Cambridge book or whatever that I, like, write out all my leads. Spiral bound. So that I can, yeah, spiral bounds so that I can just tear it out.

I'm also using Cambridge to find products that they offer, but this is a scratch pad with terrible pages that I have. Yeah, these are terrible as well. Not, like, awful, but. Oh, man, those terrible pages. Yeah. Alex, what is your notebook brand? Microsoft Word 97. Oh, nice.

Also, I just realized my pen is called Stabolo, and I'm pretty into that. Oh, Stabolo. Hey, Stabolo. It's a pretty good, I'm into it. Stabolo this page. That is funny, because we did recently talk about a Pentrans. Yeah, that's right. A pen trans.

So, welcome to stationary chat part two. Yeah, they got in contact with us and offered us a sponsorship. That's right. They said they loved what we're doing. What I didn't tell you is that pen trans, it's somebody I know. So it isn't just random, random, but they were like, here, this is one of these random gifts that, you know, people will connect with you and say, here's a sample pen. So it's a gift pen. Yeah.

Maybe they're an RPG fan and maybe one day they'll hear this. Well, they're not. But I'm going to let them know that. How do you know? How do you know? Do you ask them? Maybe. Oh, no, I know them really well.

And they're not. Maybe they don't know they're an RPG fan yet. I mean, maybe you've got a duty to run a game for them and make them an RPG fan. They're like a couple in their 60s. And they're in their 60s. You know, that's your work around the coffee table. Maybe you do that.

Hi, Linda, from Pentrans. Do you mind if I come over and run an RPG? Funny, it is, it's Lynn. Oh, that's good. Oh, good. How do you keep your notes, Alex? I've got my folder here, SKT for the Storm King Thunder, and I've got all sorts of notes.

I've got maps and, you know, pictures of, what Doran looks like, as well as Doran Ironfish character level one, two, four, seven base, seven printed, seven printed for play, and then seven printed for play, recent episode. And I just always use the recent episode

because that's the one. And I'm like Harlan, I'm all online and I'm using, you know, like an acrobat PDF. And for this, I'll just go in and add little tidbits of information here and there. And I've also got circles, like literally these O's that I put a little X through for the number I use my combat superiority.

I should clarify that the reason Alex does this is because I put his character into my edited PDF and then sent it to him. You know, I'm convinced it's been a year I can probably move entirely online also. It would probably be how I'd prefer to do it. I should clarify that I'm not entirely online. I do print out my sheets. I just keep the files online. Like, I put everything on my sheet as I get it, and then I update it at the end of the episode with my online.

Alex's many iterations on the level seven character sheet, though, have me thinking, we've been level seven for quite some time. Too long. Yeah. Some might say. Months. Is that a foreshadow? Or a five shadow? Oh, my God.

You read my mind. We're the same person. Well, the adventure is milestone leveling. So because we've been jam packing so. much content in we just haven't hit the milestone where you guys are going to level which is why I gave you those feats earlier so that you're still feeling like there's some amount of progression in your characters I think we're okay though this to me this is not about the goalpost this is about the journey along the way I'm happy to play 100 episodes at level seven so long as we're

being interesting and stuff I I feel like we're at a good point too where we feel powerful enough to be able to tackle a bunch of things and not so powerful that nothing you throw at us is the challenge. I mean, that ice fight a few episodes ago, you know, where literally Dorn and Kralov went in the drink. Oh, yeah. And that was just a few episodes ago.

That was a good one. It was a good one. Regardless, in order to level up, we must play the game. Let's do it and play the game of D&D. Don't hate the game. player hate the game. Don't hate either.

No, I don't. I don't. It's just the same. But I guess my last comment about the notion, I'm very much like like, Justin. I've got like these random names. Good. All right. Now let's do it. Thank you. That makes me good. Okay, let's do it. Let's do it now. The whole thought was made.

I'm sorry. That's so Alex. I am not a smart dwarf. Back at the Copper Cup Fest Hall, It's coming up on noon. I think Torin and Jack are, like, smiling and laughing as all of their in-jokes feel, like, really natural. Like, there's that, like, moment of, oh, okay, they're doing a thing together, and there's that, like, we've never been a part kind of moment where it's, it's just like, you know, every other thing is a, uh, some sort of celebration of doing a thing together.

It's almost like a rush of, like, having to cram in as much jovial time as possible. And maybe neither of them want to stop and think too much about it and just, like, enjoy the moment. So you and Toren are tackling things on his to-do list all morning. He's going through the entire inventory of different exotic liquors behind the bar right now with you. The two of you opening every unsealed bottle and, like, smelling the contents and tasting it and, like, sampling them. And you realize, like, some of these were fucked with, essentially. so it's like kind of fun work where you're like this one's got imp shit

yeah you take a sip and you're like this is full of salt that's awful I can't believe we were serving this to people you know what I mean like clearly it's like April Fool's Day joke type shit like none of them are poisoned but he'll like pull a wry face at one and set it aside and be like

oh yeah this one's fine Jack totally to try it and like do a spit tape And there's definitely a pile of, these ones are for Doran. And the ones that, like, he won't even notice. And the ones that are like, this one might be the prank I'll mix in. But there's... Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's only a few patrons in the tap room at this time of day,

considering the recent downturn in business. So Torin, knowing that you and he will be able to easily tend to the few people in the bar, Torin's asked the few remaining staff to attend to other people. matters upstairs for the moment, and you've seen his to-do list, like repairing broken furniture, sewing up the ripped drapes, locating the source of a foul smell, all kinds of imp-related, imp-derived mischief that needs tending to. The front door bangs open, and six figures crowd the entryway looking around. The man in front, a shorter, pasty-skinned man with a thick neck and a heavy axe poking over his shoulder

makes a beeline for the bar. Pint are your strongest for me and my crew. Sure thing, friend. Welcome to the copper cup. Torin straightens up. He starts helping you, Jack, slide pint glasses of dark brew over to the six new customers. How do you feel about this table just over there by the window?

It's got right by the fire. Seems perfect for you. The other members of the group, ignore you. They fan out and make themselves at home throughout the bar. Teafling woman with her cloaks hood thrown back to reveal her curling black horns retrieves a pint glass and delicately rests her tailbone on the edge of a nearby table. A set of twin men with sandy brown hair and roguish grins flank the bar. A dark woman with green eyes in a black silk vest ignores the drinks entirely and quietly ascends partway up the left staircase. The final dude,

A half orc, who must be seven feet tall, remains in the doorway with his arms crossed. The pasty-skinned man with the axe drains the end of his pint and scrapes a muscle-bound bare forearm across his mouth before banging the glass loudly on the bar. Do they look like locals or are they from out of town? They have the clothing that look like they are cut from Water-Davian cloth and fashion. Delicious. Excellent. Just what I needed. What do you think, lads? The twins smile even more widely. Saboke, you agree? Who's in charge here?

You? What's his about? How much for the whole place? Looks a little rundown, a little quiet, a little down as luck, maybe a little, how should I say, ripe? We're in the market. Torin straightens up, wary. The Tifling laughs at him.

The copper cup is not for sale. This festall has been in my family, many generations, so it's just. Lad, everyone has a price. You can even name yours. How do I start about the bidding? How do I, about, how about a hundred gold? And, and, we'll spare your lives.

Hell, we'll even throw in the lives of your staff. And you nods at Jack and your customers. What do you say? Fair bargain? Jack snaps his fingers and there's this illusion of fire licking off of his entire person. You don't want to fuck with this bar friend. It's the wrong day And the wrong century

Why don't you just turn around and fuck off? Everybody roll for initiative. All right. Rob, what Jack get? He got an 11 for initiative. Us too? I would like to take everyone's initiative because at this very moment

our crew of intrepid adventurers are actually right across the street from the Copper Cup making their way here. So, uh, Justin, what did Kralov get? An eight. Alex, what about Doran? A 19 for Doran.

19. And Harlan? Dirty 20. Nicely done. Dirty. All right. Jack, you started this fight off with a little bit of prestidigitry. Yeah.

Why don't you roll an intimidation check for me? I'd love to. Can I get advantage on it because it's all usury and badass? Probably not. I think real fire is scarier than fake fire. Oh, I just meant to be like, you're not fucking with a bartender, you're fucking with a goddamn wizard. That's the intimidation.

That's the implied threat. It's not about the fire. It's about the magic. Anyways, I got an eight. It's not about the fire. It's about the magic. That's a T-shirt. That is a T-shirt.

The T-Fling, who is resting her tailbone on the very far side of the table, close to the bar, responds in kind by multiplying. She laughs at you, Jack, snaps her fingers, and she, becomes four T-Flings. Ooh. Can I identify that spell? Why don't you roll Arcana? 20.

List for me your second-level spells that you have in your spellbook. Flaming sphere, gust of wind, levitate, misty step, shatter, suggestion, crown of madness. This is probably an illusion spell. You're not sure exactly which one, but you don't think she's actually created extra companions to fight with her. My intent was just to, because I want to counterspell it. That's where I'm going with this. I wanted to like just say no.

But I wanted to make sure it wasn't like a cantrip that she was fucking around with that it was, you know, worthy of the counterspell. This is not a cantrip. I think I'm just going to look at her and say no and counterspell her magic. All right. So the spell is not greater than third level. So automatically you do counterspell this effect. And as you see like these multiples sort of popping out of her body and occupying spaces beside her in the tavern, you just easily sort of brush them aside and these illusory multiples disappear. I'm telling you, this is your last chance. Get the fuck out.

The shorter pale man in the armor that's kind of ripped, he's like pulled the sleeves off of this armor so that you can see like his. big biceps. He responds by launching himself over the bar at you, Jack. Okay. He vaults over the bar and then in the same action draws his great axe off of his back and he attacks you with it. That's going to be 16 to hit. A 16 will hit, yeah. You take eight slashing damage. Okay. And then he attacks you again. Yep. 22 to hit. I will hit. You take 13 slashing damage. Oof.

Yeah, that's not great. Sounds like he lands a couple of serious blows with an axe. He does. He does. It's Torin's turn. At this, Torin grabs some of the bottles from the bar behind him and throws them at the captain to defend you. He's going to make, I mean, he's not a fighter.

So these are all going to be like attacks with improvised dwell. happens with which he is not proficient, but he throws a bottle at this captain, this bandit captain, and he misses with a four, unfortunately. And then he's going to, like, move behind one of these bottle racks and kind of take cover. The woman who's ascended the staircase on the left side of the copper cup leans out over the railing on the staircase. And she's got a crossbow trained in your direction, Jack. And she just says, you're outnumbered. Yep.

Torin is like, Jack, what do we do? Just hang tight. And she's going to hold her action. Jack, it's your turn. I'm going to do Joe's favorite. I'm going to cast FogCloud. Hey. Of course you are.

Good use, though. Good use. It is a good call. Good answer. Good answer. Show us Fog Cloud. Yeah, so I think, Jack says, yeah, I am outnumbered, but I'm not outclassed, and I'm just going to snap my fingers in the room fills with fog.

It starts to. The room starts to fill with fog, and then you hear the teethling laughing again. And similarly to the way that her illusory forms started to exit her body and then were dispelled, this fog starts to rise from the ground, and then just vanishes. as your spell is also counterspelled. Well played. It's a wizard battle. Could you imagine if there was an entire fight of counterspelling?

It's kind of cool, actually. It's just back and forth, like you can't do anything. Oh, yeah? No! Counter, counter, counter. Yeah, I think Jack keeps a steady face and sort of mentally instructs Kieran to dash over and get Torin out of here

and have the familiar sort of go with him, take the defend action while he can, and sort of urge them to get the... Get the F out. It's the rest of the rabble's turn. So we have our half orc by the door who remains there in place with his arms crossed. He like peeks out the window. And actually, as he does, he spots a couple of adventurers making their way up the street.

Doesn't think too much of it. Waterdeep is full of a whole assortment of different kinds of people. A lot of people looking capable in a lot of ways. But this guy is, he's walking. watching the doors essentially. He's just keeping a lookout. And Kralath, Red, Doran, you see that the doors of the Copper Cup Festall are closed and you spot a tall figure standing in front of them. Meanwhile, in the bar, the twins with the sandy brown hair, these other bandits who are flanking either side of the bar, one of them, quite like his captain, sort of vaults over the

top of the bar, spraying glass and liquid everywhere. And he comes up on Toran, and he's going to try to grapple him. Toran's got to make a contested strength check. Ooh, that's a natural one. I'm sorry, Torin. Oh, no. The bandit grapples Torin, so he's got him in like a headlock. And the other bandit comes around and tries to do the same to you, Jack.

Sure. A bunch of bullies. Ooh, second natural one. So how do you do on this grapple check? I got an eight. You squirm free of this bandit's grasp, someone who had underestimated you and your nimble qualities. All right. Top of the order.

We got our Tiefling Mage. She is going to reassess who the biggest threat in this bar is, and she vanishes. Yeah, I'm going to save my reaction for Shield, I think is my plan. I guess you wouldn't have Mage Armour on either. It lasts for eight hours. kind of well here's the thing actually you didn't sleep last night oh you don't have a long rest jack as a character who has not performed a long rest someone who chose to obviously go and rescue his boyfriend from jail and investigate the hall of serenity and try to find out as much as you can about what was happening

from foregoing your long rest you have accumulated one level of exhaustion gotcha so you're going to be performing all of your ability checks during this combat with disadvantage. Wow. Drink coffee, quick. So the Tifling goes invisible, you presume, vanishes somehow. Next up

we have the bandit captain who is menacing you, Jack. He's just slashed at you twice with an axe and you've dodged his companions advances on you and he growls at you. He's going to... Seems like a real

bully this guy yeah they're all bullies um he's going to menace you and he's going to try to intimidate you into submitting so he brandishes his axe at you maybe he tickles your chin with it a little bit backs you into a corner and he says come on now we don't have to show your boyfriend what the color of your guts looks like today let me roll an intimidation check this is the third natural one on this green dice. Shame, shame, shame, shame. With gold numbers, I'm shaming it. All right, so he says all that, and obviously you're unimpressed, Jack.

You've just put a wizard in a corner in my boyfriend's bar, and I care about this place, but things can be replaced. So if it's going to go down, it's not going to be pretty for any of us. I'll show you how not pretty something like this can get. and he swings his axe at you twice. Sure. That's a 17 to hit you? Yeah, we're going to bring the shield up

and just look at him and close my fist and have this energy come around me and just, again, like with the other magic, just say, no. I love it. And then a 20 to hit you, I believe. A 20 will hit, yeah. The 20 hits.

So you bring up your shield and his axe just clangs off of the shield. The second hit, though, he sees what you've done here. He runs with a mage. He knows what shield looks like. And he gets the act head up underneath and sort of just slashes at your thigh.

You take six slashing damage. So it's not a big hit, but he draws blood again from you. Sneering. Red. You are outside of the Copper Cup Festall in the street. You're maybe 15 feet away at this point.

I think red, like we're very casually walking up to the front and he like puts his hand over the front door and he stops he's like, you know, Jack and Torrin have been through a lot. Maybe we should give them some space. Plenty of bars down the street. But we don't know the owners of the bars down the street. Come on, this is

free beer here. And not only that, but I get to see Torin. I haven't seen him in a long time. Come on. Kralath has his hands full of cupcakes and he says, and I've got to pitch that idea to Torin about calling it the copper cupcake hall. That was a good idea.

All right, I guess we'll go in. And Red opens the door, and what do I see the back of this big orc? No, you see like the side of this big orc. He's keeping one eye on what's going on in the fest hall, and he's keeping one eye on the door. So, you know, you appear to him as a patron, and he turns to him and he says, Barr's closed. He tries to close the door in your face. And Red puts his foot in the door.

Oh, no, no, no, we know the owner. Torin's a friend of ours, and I sort of push my way in or try to. Yeah, why don't you make an athletics check? For like a dodge or to push the door? To push the door open. Well, I think I would like let it shut if it was that. Yeah, he's like closing the door on you. And I'm like, well, no, can I roll perception from what I maybe saw when the door was open?

Absolutely. 16. Yeah, you get a good look across the bar. You see Jack and Torrin against the wall behind the bar with a bunch of dudes, like, real close. And red flashes to the other two, heat in his eyes, and. anger. And he says, Doran, kick the fucking Doran. And I ready my action for when Doran kicks the fucking Doran. I mean, it's Doran's turn next. I know. So you just wait and then Doran, what do you do? Not even. Red pulls out his bow, ready's an arrow and aims it directly at the

head of the guy on the other side of the door and then nods to Doran. Doran's adrenaline immediately begins to start rushing as soon as Red says something. Without hesitation, Doran pulls his axe from his sheath and then charges the door. Let's do a strength contest. 22. You put your shoulder to the door and with a creak of wood and a confused from the other side, you like slide this half-orke bandit back on his heels as you make a dwarf-sized crack in the door.

So it opens like a good foot and a half red. You can see him through it. The minute the door cracks open enough and I see this orc sort of tumbling back, red lets loose an arrow. Yeah, I rolled a hit. 15 to hit? That hits. 28 damage.

Your arrow goes through the side of this guy's head, as if he's wearing one of those arrow headbands, but without the headband. Like, threw one temple out the other, and he falls to the ground dead, leaking blood everywhere. Red then, readies another arrow immediately, and fires again at the first combat, and he can see. There's two guys behind the bar,

one beside Jack, one beside Torin, and then there's the captain. Red fires at the guy beside Torin. He's like grappling Torin. You can see he's got Torin in a headlock. Torin's face is starting to turn red a little bit. 11. No, you miss.

Damn. So the arrow just like smashes a bottle next to this guy's face. And Red just screams out. Charge him, Doran. So Doran, you moved 10 feet to get up next to the door where the bandit was. Now is slumped against the door. Yeah. What do you do?

I dashed into the room, 60 feet jumping. over tables and land about middle of the bar and look around to get my bearings. There's some real visible relief that washes over Jack's face to see Doren like hook it into the bar. Yeah. I mean not only that imagine the scene when like this orc standing at the door gets the door bashed in on him and arrows straight through his head. He falls over dead. Then Doren runs in. It's a cool scene. Like a fucking

avalanche, this dwarf. Not only that but Doren lets out a cry. What's going on here? As another combatant enters the bar, the woman on the stairs in the dark clothes, she swings her crossbow to address this new threat and fires. It's a 19 to hit you, Dorn. That hits. Ooh, you're going to take some serious damage. Actually, this is kind of decent for you, though.

So it's nine piercing damage. Okay. And then something courses through your veins that makes you feel sick and queasy. However, as a dwarf, you have resistance to poison damage, correct? I do. I do, natural. Make a constitution save. Saving throw is a nine.

So, unfortunately, you take full damage on this, which as a dwarf is only half damage because you have poison resistance, which is great, because that would be 26 damage. Oh, wow. So you take 13 damage. So she swings her crossbow from pointing behind the bar to pointing towards the doorway and looses an arrow that drives deep into your shoulder. It's Torin's turn. He's struggling with the bandit that has him in a headlock.

He is going to do his best to escape this grapple and to run. Let's see how he does here. Okay, that's a 16 to escape the grapple. And the bandit, 11. Fuck yeah. Torin scrambles out, just makes his shoulders real small. just like pops out from the headlock. He's going to take an attack of opportunity

as this bandit tries to stab him with a knife that he has in his other hand. Torin takes three damage, which is, I mean, he doesn't have a lot of hit points. We'll put it that way. Listen here. I haven't been violent yet. This is your last chance

to walk out of here with your lives, friends. What is that? Like the fourth time you said that? I'm not going to do another last chance. The bandit looks over his shoulder at you and you see that Torin's taken a knife between the ribs as he makes a dash towards the door. Torin sort of limps as quickly as he can to behind where some casks of ale are stacked. And Jack, you know that there's a back door back there. Torin is trying to get closer to the exit, if not flee entirely.

And he looks at you with like pain and fear in his eyes. eyes. Jack, what do I do? Just get out of here. Get safe. This is Jack. Always pushing me away. It's like, it's the assassin's turn. The woman on the stairs, she's going to take another shot at Doran as he advances into the bar. She wants to keep hold on this situation. Here she goes. She's going to try. 24 to hit you. Yep.

Four piercing damage. Make a constitution saving throw. 15. Oh, great. So you saved against this poison, which means you're taking half of your half. So you take five damage only from this arrow. All right, Jack, it's your turn. You see Doren coming into the bar. He's getting peppered with arrows from the second floor. Torin gets stabbed, but he staggers away, bleeding. What do you do now? Yeah, I'm going to say, watch out for their invisible mage. And going to have... Threaten them again with a last chance. Do it again. It's not

going to work. Now we're getting, now we're getting serious. It's getting spicy in here. Jack grabs the spellguard sphere from his pouch, and it fills full of energy, and these bursting rays of sunlight sort of goost with all of his magical, alchemical know-how

coming shooting out in magic missiles into the face of the two folks in front of him. Wow, okay. Cool. Sounds great. So you hit them with these glowing, magical rays. Yeah. Two on one and one on the or how many rays are we talking?

Four darts shoot out at the captain for 58 damage and the other two go out to the twin beside me for 22 damage as these, you know, six bolts of radiant, lethandrian force come shooting out of them around the chain sort of lashing out and wrapping around these folks. It's spectacular to behold. Your body just starts shooting these missiles of light out

at the two dudes who are fighting you. The bandit captain takes. four of these missiles of energy to the chest and he stumbles backward a step, blood coming out of his ears and he braces himself against the bar. He's still up, but he's not doing good. The bandit who was menacing you, trying to get you in a headlock earlier, he just collapses in a pile of ash. Whoa. Dully smoking. I reach to my belt again and pull out the decanter of endless water and has a bonus action pointed at the captain and say, Geyser. And just This huge spurt of water flings right at the captain who could make me a DC-13 strength save, please.

All right. Oh, yeah, no problem. 15. He just gets roll wet. So he braces himself against the spray of water from the decanter. Are you done, Jack? I am done, yeah. Could you have Kieran land near the invisible creature so that I could fire at it or something?

Oh, fuck, he can see invisibility. Yeah. Dude, yeah. I didn't even think about that. As Jack moves towards the captain, he mentally communicates to Kieran, go fly towards the invisible creature. And I'll shout to Red, Kieran's marking the invisible mage. So Kieran flies over the bar and sort of does like a little tight wheel in the air just above the farthest corner of the bar, indicating the mage is like right adjacent to them. Good turn, Jack.

We're seeing some fury here. And you catch just a glimpse of Torin as he peeks out from behind the cask of ale that he's hiding behind. It's like this. That poor boy. There's like, it's fear and admiration and love and injury all like warring on his face. Kralath, it's your turn. You are outside the bar. You watch his red fires in.

Doran runs in. You hear like the familiar sound of magic missile. Oh, yeah. I know it very well. It's like hissing, exploding. What do you do? Kralov slings his shield off of his back and he turns to red and he says, I'm going to run around back, see if I can get him through the kitchen.

Kralov, this isn't a time for food. It's all right. I have a plan. Okay. And he's going to take off at a sprint. Great. So you dash around the side of the bar, like through an alleyway, ducking underneath laundry, vaulting over some like discarded crates.

And I make it along the wall and I'm going as quickly as I'm. can. Good. So I can get to the window. So I can kind of see in the window. I can kind of peer around it. Yes. You dash through the alleyway and you can see through kind of a dusty window, the action unfolding in the bar as you sprint. All right. And Kralov gets to this window and he leans in and he leans in and sees Doren running in and taking these arrows. And he whispers a few words and a shimmer of light surrounds Doran as I cast shield of faith on him and continue to run forwards and as I do I whisper, hang in there, Jack. The final member of the rabble, the bandit who had been headlocking Torin, decides to help

his captain. So he moves forward to menace Jack and he tries to stab him with his scimitar. Consider not. You kill my twin brother. I don't want you to, so just... You cut them. I mean, that's fair. He raises his scimitar and then brings it down on your head, Jack.

Oh, my God. That is 16 to hit you? That will hit. You take five points of slashing damage. Oh, no. Yikes. Oh, no. It is the mage's turn, wherever they may be.

Hint, hint. We don't know that. no way you can know where a mage is. She's got magic missiles of her own. Cool. Jack Doran, you watch as these missiles of force erupt from

a spot beside the bar. One of them strikes Kieran for five damage. Yeah, Kieran is knocked back spinning and just erupts into a puff of leaves from the forest that drift down to the ground and then evaporate into

magical dust as they are destroyed. Mm-hmm. No! So the mage destroys you're familiar. Then a bolt of force sears through the bar and explodes on Doren. You take five points of force damage, Doren. Okay.

And a third dart of force curls over the bar around the bandit captain. And Jack, you take three points of force damage. Oh. Next up, the bandit captain. He is going to disengage from you, Jack. He's going to climb atop the bar. And he turns toward the assassin on the stairs, and he starts berating her.

What are you doing? Over here. Don't you see there's a mage? Coughs up blood from that busted lung. So he directs her to whom he would like to attack next. Red, it's your turn. Red bursts through the front door and sees the scene before him, Doran's standing in the center taking hits from this woman on the stairs

with the crossbow and Jack being grievously injured in the back. He readies his first attack to take out the woman on the stairs. I'm going to move so that I can cast Hunter's mark, so I'll be within 90 feet of her. Cool. So you like rush in between these two tables on the floor. He pulls out the scone from his pocket and stuffs it in his mouth and looks at Cradle off through the window, give him a thumbs up.

Then he fires at the assassin on the stairs. And I'm going to use my inspiration on this. Yeah, let's do it. Dirty 20. Yeah, you hit. 28 damage. Nicely done. Nice.

Yeah, I'll attack her again. 19 hit. Yep. 20 damage. Great. Doran, what do you do? Doran, here's the captain say, you know, take care of the mage or whatever. And Doran's adrenaline amps up even more.

because he realizes that they're attacking Jack. Doran charges in, and he goes straight for the captain. And then he's going to use his action surge, which allows me to perform an additional action. And I leap over the bar, maybe through this captain's legs, you know? Oh, I like it. And I slide onto the floor, essentially sitting right beside Jack and this sandy-haired twin. And I guess sort of like a soldier in a trench war, I kind of land on the ground and I say, I'm here. Just in time, Doran.

Pulling my axe, I ready to attack on my next turn, whoever is closest by. I love it. It's Torin's turn. He's going to stand up from behind where he's hiding, grab another bottle from the floor beside him, where Jack and he had been. sorting things before this whole terrible ordeal even started. He grabs a bottle, hefts it, and takes aim, and throws it at the bandit captain who's standing on top of the bar. Yeah, unfortunately, that misses.

So the bottle just shatters at the captain's feet. And then Torin, again, ducks back behind the barrel where he was taking cover. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. Why did I do this barefoot? It's the assassin on the stairs' turn. She did not like taking those arrow hits from you, Red. She ducks behind the banister and hides as a bonus action. It's a natural 20 to hide.

Better than a natural 20 to hit you, darling. So she is going to attack and also deal sneak damage at you with her crossbow. If she hits. That's a natural 20 to hit. Oh, gosh. Two natural 20s in a row. I might be dead. Path of the grave?

Are you within? Nope. I am not within range. Crayloth is around the side. Joe, save it happened, but he can't do anything. You get a net,

you get a crit. I mean, it's a lot of dice. This might be the most dice I've ever rolled because it's a 1D8 for her crossbow damage. Then I've got sneak dice and poison dice.

I'm doubling everything. Oh no. Shit. Yeah, it's a lot of dice, my friends. All right. I could die here. 17 piercing damage and 30 poison damage. Make a Constitution saving throw.

Oh boy. Here we go. 16. You make it. Fuck yeah. So only 15 of that poison damage gets through as you steal your resolve against the effects of this poison. Beautiful. Not bad.

That means I would have had one hit point had I failed it. Jack, it's your turn. You watch as red. takes this awful hit from a lady wielding the crossbow on the stairs. Doran's right beside you, breathing heavy, smelling awful. If only Kieran was here to really savor that smell, but sadly... So Jack points the decandre of Endless Water at the twin standing in front of him and shouts Geyser and blast him with water.

That's an 11 to save. That'll fail so he can take 1D4 damage and fall prone. All right, I got a 4 on that. Beautiful. That's what I want to hear. Nice. Jack's then going to slowly back away to get under the stairs so that assassin can't see him. Okay, the bandit's going to make like a wild swing with his scimitar.

Attacks you with disadvantage for opportunity attack. That's a three to hit. That's going to miss. So Jack gets under the stairs and has now his spellguard sphere from these chains he's wrapped around it hanging, which glows and now thunders this big humming ring as he tries to pull the life of the captain who's standing on the bar. out of them. So that would be a saving throw.

What kind? Wisdom saving throw. I got a five. That won't do it. And since he's already injured, he's going to take 2D12 damage. Whoa. Which works out to 23. From your position under the

stairs, Jack, with your spell guard's fear in hand, your spell lances across the bar and sucks the life out of this captain. He collapses in a dry, withered husk and slumps off the bar. His corpse hits the ground with a dull smack. And I think Jack's still like one hand on the geyser, the other hand on the sphere sort of

looking around, almost like he's looking for his next target. Crayloth, what happens next? Krayloth keeps running. I'm coming, Jack. And he moves 60 feet. Yeah, you hug the corners. You bashed through the door with your shoulder. I look around. I take in my surroundings. What do I see? Yeah. Right in front of you is the kitchen. There's some appetizing smell. Something is being roasted in the oven. There is no cook in the kitchen because all the staff is probably cowering upstairs. And you see Torin, who's hiding behind one of these barrels. He's finding his next projectile right now. And he turns, looks over his shoulder at you as you bust in through the door. he's like, he like flinches away from you, not sure if your friend or phone.

It's okay, Torin. It's going to be all right. You stay down, though. And I can see the wound in his gut. Kralath. And I'm going to cast Sanctuary as a bonus action on him. Cool. Thank you.

Good one. Yeah, it'll last for a minute. The bandit beside you, Doran, who was just beguisered, stands up with half of his movement, and then he swings at you with his scimitar. Of course he does. He's going to try to. That's 11 to hit you. And he misses, like a pathetic loser.

How do you really feel? You block, maybe using the haft of orc splitter, and his scimitar is harmlessly rebuffed. You call that an attack, you weak scoundrel. Oh, you know what? I'm going to repose. Hey, I like it. So that's going to probably hit with a 19.

It certainly does. And so 14 damage. Wow, yeah. So he swings at me and his scimitar goes over my head and sticks into the side of the bar and I swing my axe wildly back at him and I hit him right in the gut with the end of the orc splitter. Wow. Fuck yeah. Okay. I can't believe you're still living after that.

He looks down in his stomach. He can't believe he's living either. Doren, as you attack this bandit and nearly cut him in half, you feel something come over you. Make a wisdom saving throw. Straight up 19. Straight up. Wow. Nice.

All right. Dorn isn't smart, but he is wise. You were nearly enchanted and you shrug off its effects. Something's going on funny here. There's something magical. Some magical presence I'm feeling. I yell out loud. Next up, dead captain.

Let me just strike that from the record. Dead captain. He releases his bowels. Ew, Justin. He shits all. I'm sorry, it's what happens. Red, it's your turn. I'm not cleaning that up.

This is nature, Joe. It's beautiful. Decomposition. What do you do, Red? Red is going to kill this chick on the stairs. All right, let's see it happen. That would be an eight to hit. You miss.

And I'll attack again. 13 to hit. No, you miss. Damn. And then Red is going to move back so that he is in full cover behind the wall near the front door. Nice. Cool. It's Torin's turn.

I think seeing. that the bar is largely being protected by his boyfriend and his boyfriend's friends, he's going to carefully run back through the back room to where Kralath is standing, and he's going to hang out in the kitchen for a little bit, and he's just going to, like, recover his stamina because that stab wound did not do him any favors. Give him a scone. Kraloth, there's a, there's a mage that's invisible somewhere in the bar. There's one more bandit and there's an assassin on the stairs.

All right. You're going to be okay there? Yeah, I'm fine. Okay. I mean, he's putting on a brave face. It's going to be all right. We'll take care of it. Here.

And he just reaches into his pouch and throws out some bandages. Yeah, like the cleanest gauze or rags or whatever that you have. Yeah, yeah. Awesome. Yeah, and he starts bandages. himself. It's the assassin's turn. Because Red was able to hide himself away from her, she's going to have to stalk. She stalks down the stairs and starts hunting around the bar for other targets. She casts her eye at Jack, who's hiding underneath the stairs, and she aims her crossbow

at him. This is the end. Throw down the sphere. Uh, sure. You roll it towards her? Yeah, I'll toss it In the ground? Yeah. She picks it up. She's got your arcane focus now. One of them, yep. And then she fires an arrow at you. All right.

24 to hit. Oof. A 24 will hit, yeah. You take seven piercing damage. Mm-hmm. Make a constitution saving throw. Fifteen. Ooh, you save.

So you take a total of 11 poison damage as she fires a poison dart into your side. Jack goes down. And then with her remaining five feet of movement, she continues to walk towards you intending fully to find out what kind of cool trinkets you got on your body. Good ones. Jack, make a saving throw against death.

Three. Oh! That's one fail. No, Torin doesn't see any of this because he is hiding in the kitchen with Kralov. Signs in the kitchen with Craylon. Crayloth, it's your turn. You've just handed Torn some bandages. He's told you to take care of his love.

Don't worry. Opens the door. Oh, shit. shuts the door. Torin. Crayloth hears the familiar twang of a crossbow. And I got to get in there. And he runs past Doren, bursts through the doors.

And immediately, he sees. this assassin stalking towards Jack. Yeah. And he immediately casts hold person. Don't move a muscle. Oh. I love it. Nice one.

How does that work? It is a concentration spell, unfortunately, so you're going to lose your AC. Alex. It's okay. Thank you. Choose a humanoid that you can see within range. The target must succeed on a wisdom saving throw or be paralyzed for the duration at the end of each of its turns.

Target can make another wisdom saving throw, blah, blah, blah. Here we go. That's an 11. The wisdom save is a fail. Nice. Old person is in effect. So this creature is now paralyzed. And a paralyzed creature is incapacitated, can't move or speak,

automatically fails strength and dexterity. Attack rolls against the creature have advantage. And an attack that hits the creature is a critical hit if the attacker is within five feet of the creature. So Kralov does this and says, Red, take her down. She's vulnerable. On it, buddy! Nice.

It's the rabble's turn. The bandit stands up with half of his movement and tries valiantly to down the dwarf that's in front of him. Good luck. Swing and a miss. Doran turns and takes a swing of beer on the bar casually. Maybe I should just do another repose. Fucking do it. You're a hero.

You're a hero. You're a hero. Use those actions when you got him. There's no reason to save it. So he does. You swing at me. You're going to get it. And that's.

A 22 to hit. Yeah, you hit. Doing 16 damage. What does it look like when you kill this man? Got him. As he stands up and tries to swing, he misses me again, hitting almost the same spot. Oh, I imagine his scimitar just, like,

cuts heavily into the bar, and he's, like, trying to pull it out. And Dorn pulls his axe out from the stomach of this guy and puts it right back in with a little bit more force, cutting his spine in a half. Gross. watches this person Not fully fall apart There's still skin and guts

Holding the two halves of his body together But his spine is fully severed And he kind of like collapses in a broken heap Gross, I love it Take that you bastard I mean The T-Fling comes back into view Yeah

Just pops into existence As she casts a spell at you, Doren another one. This one, I would like you to please make another wisdom save. It's going to be a straight up 13. Straight up.

No, you fail. Oh, unwise Doran. Doran's not a smart dwarf. Or a wise dwarf. Doran, all around you, there are manifestations of your deepest nightmares. Oh, God.

What do you see? What is the illusory image that starts to plague your consciousness? It's right there at the forefront of my mind, surrounded by my dead wife and her dead family. She's dead? Yes, as well as my dead friends that died under Danlin's Peak. And they're like all pointing their fingers and saying, it's all your fault. It's all your fault.

It's all your fault. It's all your fault. Yeah. You take this psychic assault, seeing the bodies of all of your friends and loved ones that you face. that you killed inadvertently or advertently. No, no. Crawling towards you from underneath the bar, tables, their faces reflected at you from every pint glass.

I don't look anywhere. I curl up into a ball and start crawling under the bar. Red, it's your turn. Red steps out from behind cover to see the two women in the center of the bar, one frozen stiff, the other casting on Doran. He sees Jack down. Kraloth panicked looking towards him.

Red puts one foot on the head of the fallen orc in the front door and pulls the arrow out, wiping the blood off on his pant leg and readies it and fires at the woman who is paralyzed. All right. No sense wasting an arrow on you. That will be a 23 to hit. You do. 27 damage. Nice.

The arrow sinks deeply into the space between her shoulder and her neck. You see, like, a spurt of blood just hit the wall. And I'll fire again. Mm-hmm. He'll turn his focus towards the mage and attack her for this next attack. All right. 15 to hit? You hit.

Nice. Doing 20 damage. Okay. Great. And red moves back into full cover. All right, Doran, it's your turn. All right. So, am I just shocked still, or am I okay to move?

Ork Splitter starts whispering in your ear, and she's like... Doran, Doran, don't worry about it. Doran, we can kill anything. We can kill anything. You're right. Fuck, yeah. And the bodies of your friends that died in your care just start, like, smiling at you and, like, winking. And then they like, slowly.

Right. Yeah. You're right. They just slowly disappear into the floor. You are immune from the spell, essentially, because you are not frightened of this person. You're, you're right. Doren shakes his head and isn't frightened of this spell that this mage is cast upon him. He stands up, looks around with his eyes just barely peering over the edge of the bar, and he leaps across the room. Ork Splitters, like lending you all this bravery.

Yeah. Yeah. Ha! Yeah! This fucking standing leap up onto the bar. I leap across, and with a foul swoop, I swing my axe while mid-air and attack the paralyzed assassin. Rule to hit. You have advantage to hit her. 25. Oh, shit.

And it's crit, auto-crit. Oh, it's auto-crit as well. It's an auto-crit. Because we're within five feet, Alex. Because we're within five feet and she's paralyzed. Great. So, Doran, you leap through the air, orc splitter at the ready. You land directly beside this assassin who's paralyzed.

you still see like fear reflected in her eyes seeing her quarry now directly beside her and how do you put her down? I say, you should have split. And Ork splitter

in your hands, you chop her to pieces. In true door and fashion, not just once, but a few times. I want you to make a wisdom saving throw with advantage. Okay.

That's going to be an eight. Oh. With advantage? With advantage. Oh, yes. ikes, okay. So you are not frightened, but you are going to take 21 damage. Yikes. Oh. Damn. Psychic damage? Yeah. Jack. Make a save against death. 16. Nice. All right. That's one save, one fail. Kralath. Your turn.

Kraloth sees the assassin go down and he also sees Jack bleeding out on the floor and he runs towards him. And when he gets within 30 feet, he's going to cast Spare the Dying as a bonus action. Nice. So Jack is going to be okay. And then he turns his sights on the remaining teafling. And then I'm going to shout to Red the old one, too, and cast Path to the Grave, which is going to make it so that the next hit against her does double damage. And I'm also going to give Red my inspiration. Oh, beautiful.

Oh, right. Take a route. I love it. It's the mage's turn. She casts lightning bolt on you, Justin. Oof. So erupting from her hands, she jolts you with this bolt of electricity.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Lightning bolt, lightning bolt. Between you and me, you've had enough lightning for one day. Make a dexterity saving throw. My specialty. You're gonna rock it. You got this, Kralath. Four.

Yeah, you fail. Oh, no. I can't imagine. You are hit in the chest by this bolt of lightning. It throws you back. You take 22 lightning damage. Jesus. The lightning also ignites a table nearby, and it starts crackling into flames.

And as you shake your head hard to get yourself back in the moment, back in the fight, you hear the voice of your captain. He walks out from behind the bar. You see this ghostly figure behind the mage, like 20 feet away from you. And he just says, get back in the fight, soldier. Yes, sir. Red, it's your turn. Red walks out from behind cover and approaches, so he's within 90 feet. As a bonus action, he moves his hunter's mark onto the mage.

With advantage, he's going to roll using his colossus slayer. And he is going to down this mage. Roll to hit. 16 to hit. Your arrow flies true, but then a shield goes up and your arrow flies off to the side. Yes. That was with advantage too, eh? Yes.

I don't have advantage anymore, yeah. That was inspiration. I got another inspiration for you. Yeah? Sure, take mine. I'll take it. Here we go. Red takes another arrow.

This one, a special arrow made with the Liferlis branch. Yes. He's been holding on to these for a while. Come on, buddy. The branch of the Lefellas. 18? No. No!

Yeah, so this translucent, shimmering shield deflects both of your arrows red, and she smiles at you from behind it wickedly. Doran, it's your turn. Doran, it's your time. Killer. I mean, any damage to her, does it, so. Yep.

Yeah, and run forward. Yeah, and I'm going to swing my axe wildly. Do it. It's the old one, two, three. Do it. I'm going to use my inspiration for this. Yeah, do it, Doran. The old one, two, three.

That's good. A four and an 18, so that's going to be a 27 to hit. Oh. 27 to hit? Yeah. Yeah, it lands true. Nice. So you double damage because it passed to the grave.

The next time you were an ally hits the cursed creature with an attack, the creature has vulnerability. So Doran, roll damage, and this creature takes double whatever you deal. Okay, so 34 damage. Oh. So as this mage has her shield up and busily deflecting arrows from red, Doran, you see your opportunity and you stride forward and confidently with strength, Barry axe splitter deep between her shoulder blades, and she goes down on one knee, and then she collapses. Uh-huh. Good job, guys. Just like your friends.

Good job, guys. Jack, I run over to Jack. Oh, but there's a fire. There's a fire. Torin, get a bucket of water or something. Torin runs out from the kitchen with a bucket of water, throws it on the table, and then sees you all gathered around Kralath. Where's Jack? And then he sees him underneath the stairs, and he goes running to him and holds him in his arms.

Kralath. Kralath. Thorin, Torin, like I said, it's going to be all right. Kellenvoy's got your boy, and he's going to cast cure wounds on Jack. Jack, you come to, you're looking up and like the blurry rafters of the bar come into focus and then you see your friends standing around you and Torin, this is worried face. It's all right. It's going to be okay. Don't you ever scare me like that again.

Torin, and Red puts a hand on Torin's shoulder. Just wait to hear what Kralath wants to call the Copper Cup Hall. That was quite the fight! Thanks once again to our wonderful Patreon supporters Christopher Ryan Evans, Mitchell Cadwell, Perrin Caristie, Mary Karniske, Jessica Orrett, Colin Burckhardt, Daniel Doug, Katie Orrett and Merlin. See you soon.

Do do-de-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. Who is he? He is called Ven-N-Mortis.