Dig It with Jo Whiley and Zoe Ball - 57: The Garden Story That Floored Us

Episode Date: January 19, 2026

There’s advice for juggling work, study and physio, a moving message about love, ageing parents and a final day spent in the garden.SUBSCRIBE TO OUR FREE NEWSLETTERStay up to date with Dig It — new updates every Friday straight to your inbox.👉 https://digitpod.substack.com/subscribeGET IN TOUCH📧 Email us: [e-mail]📱 Text or Voice Note: 07477 038795💬 Or tap here to send a voice note or message on WhatsApp:⁠ ⁠https://wa.me/447477038795SPECIAL THANKS TO OUR SPONSORSThis episode is brought to you by QVC &  Ancient + Brave✨QVC – Click below to discover QVC’s range of wellbeing products and support. And don't forget to use the code QDIG10 for £10 off your first purchase (minimum spends apply, see QVC website for full terms and conditions) https://www.qvcuk.com/content/health-and-fitness.html?cid=PR-IF-Digit&e22=janwellbeing ✨Ancient + Brave – This January isn’t about being “good”, it’s about having energy that actually lasts. Ancient + Brave’s True Creatine+ supports strength, cognition and steady energy without the jitters or crash. It’s neutral tasting, dissolves easily and fits effortlessly into real life. They’re also a certified B Corp and members of 1% for the Planet, so it’s good for you and good for the planet too. Subscribe and save 20% on your monthly wellness rituals, plus get a free ritual scoop. Head to ancientandbrave.earth to get started.CREDITSExec Producer: Jonathan O’SullivanAssistant Producer: Eve JonesTechnical Producer: Oliver GeraghtyVideo Editors: Danny PapeDig It is a Persephonica production

Coming up on Digits. Although we couldn't be there to say goodbye to her, it just felt that that was where she needed to be. What a beautiful story that she was out feeding the birds. That's so lovely. I tried to do the gratitude thing today because I was feeling quite stress. Oh, did you? I'm still really worried and anxious,

so I'm not entirely sure I've got the handle on it yet. We will get Joe Wiley to understand gratitude. We will. My dad called me a sh-h-h-this weekend because he'd watched the podcast. All of that, right after this. Happy Monday, Joe. Happy Monday to you.

You're right. I'm all right, my darling. Do you have a lovely weekend? Yeah, it was okay. I went to a pantomime. Oh, no, you didn't. Oh, yes, I did. It's very late for Panto, isn't it?

Yeah, I went to see Rapunzel. But they do carry on for a really long time. So shout out to Nathan, who was amazing as the very charming prince in Rapunzel. So, yeah, did that. did a lot of telewatching, that's pretty much all I did. That's what January is for. Yeah. It is, it's, you know, the dodgy weather, it's chilly, we're all recovering.

We should use this time wisely. I have always said that I could hibernate. I seriously, I have bear-like qualities, sloth quite tight qualities as well, sloth. I could quite easily come through New Year, fill a little burrow, with seeds and nuts, chocolates, possibly, and a bit of telly, and a nest underground and come up in the spring with the bulbs. I could do that.

I am such a bear. I'd happily do that. It's hard. January is really hard. The one thing I think is to set goals, which is what we spoke about last week. And I mentioned the London landmarks half, which I have now officially signed up to.

And Cass has already got three runs in. So my idea is I'm supporting him, as he's doing a run. But he's already done three runs and I've done nothing. So I'm just sitting here feeling really, really guilty and knowing that after we do this today, I've got to get my trainers on and I've got to do some attempt at running, which is going to be very, very painful. But it's got to begin somewhere. It's in April, so I haven't really got long to go. Oh, I'm so scared. I'm so in awe of everyone who's started their marathon training as well for all the marathons. Oh, so people are so good. I was thinking about being couch to 5K, but then I've realized my hip is still

really bad. And my other hip is now playing up. So I don't think running will be for me. Walking is tricky at the moment. But I am going to go back to a really fab trainer down here and see if he can help me get my hip strong again. Sol. Come on. Better call soul, as they say. Oh, I've just realized I had a steroid injection in my shoulder on Friday. And is it starting to work? It's starting to work. I mean, I click in every bit of my body. But it was so, painful afterwards for a few days and I was like, what the hell have I done? But I can move it now. So there you go. Nineties anthems,

I'll be there. Oh yeah, and you're coming to Brighton, aren't you? I am, yes. A Friday night. I, fingers crossed, I might be late, but I will be there. Okay. Because I've got to go to Birmingham to do a telly show. I'm being a judge on a cooking thing. Just a one-off, which I'm quite excited about because you get to say, can you cook this and then they cook it.

And as a non-cook, I don't really feel like I've got a to judge at all, but I do eat a lot. So that's much. But so I've got to come back from Birmingham. I was like, oh my God, that's the day Joe's in Brighton. But I will be there front and centre and I can't wait. And I'm probably, I might even come on my own, Joe. You know, because you talk about all these people who come to, you know, United Anthem nights on their own. So if you haven't got anyone to go with, I'm going to come and watch my friend and dance all night and I can't wait. You won't be on your own. You'll have disco, Steve? Is disco going to be there? Yeah. Of course you will. Yeah. You're fantastic. You're sure he's not going to be filling in at any point trying to play Mariah Carey?

Because Steve, it's a bright and crowd. Come on. It'll be fun. Diggers, by the way, if you are listening right now, we need your help. We need some ideas. We need some merch ideas. So what we would like is, because we did these wonderful Christmas cards, and they were so cool and so great. And we got lots of really cool cards from you lots.

We know you have the creativity. We know you've got the ideas, and we know you're really funny. So what should we do? Do we do a dig it hat? Is there a mug? Slogans. We need a slogan, what it should say. We need slogans.

Yeah. What do people use a lot? Yeah, what do you want? Because, I mean, I don't look good in a hat. The fuck off I'm gardening hat has been taken by a brilliant company who've done that. So we can't do that. And also, I don't look good in a baseball hat. No, I don't either.

I'm all face. So hats, you know, it could be. Is it a T-shirt? Is it a sweatshirt? Is it a mug? is there something else that people use a lot? Is it a tea towel? And what goes on it?

Is it a slogan? Yeah. It won't be pictures of Joe and I because we can't stand that. So don't worry. Don't worry. But if you have any advice on what you think would make good merch for us all and perhaps some slogans that we could put on it, we'd love to hear from you. How do they get in touch, Joe?

Oh, it's all in the show notes. Simply, all in the show notes. Go there and all the details. What do you need in your life and what slogan do we have on? it. That's what we need from you. And perhaps what you don't need in your life. If you're like, please don't send me another dot dot dot dot, but what I do need is dot dot dot. Maybe we should do some seeds as well. It would be such a lovely idea to send out some seeds because seeds are really easy to send out and they're really easy to give a go to and we're all sort of in that mood at

the moment and you don't need a huge amount of space to grow some seeds. So maybe we could do that with whatever the merches. But anyway, thinking caps on. Please, everyone. If you would like each brand new episode of Dig It ready and waiting for you, all you have to do is hit follow or subscribe wherever you get this podcast. So simple. Okay, we have our first question, which means I have to put my glasses on to read this. So this is Lauren who said, I was wondering if you had any advice for me. I'm a 28-year-old woman working three days a week, university placement, two days a week, physiotherapy appointments, and soon to add another university unit. People talk about work. study, life balance, but honestly, I'm struggling. Any tips or advice on how to manage it all? I can just feel this tension and this stress building up in my body. It's hard, isn't it, when there is just so much to fit into your working day, your living day, and it can be quite overwhelming. Like you can get up really early in the morning, you can try and fit things in. I, if ever I have a

really busy time coming up, I make myself get up a lot earlier. I know I'm more productive first thing in the morning, so I'll get up and I'll just try and rattle through. as many things I possibly can and get them out of the way. Eat those frogs. But sometimes there is just too much of it into your head more than anything and your body takes its toll. Like all the tension just builds up and all the

lactic acid builds up in your muscles and you're just full of aches and pains. And then it affects your sleep as well doesn't it because then you're lying there and you're worrying about it and you're going to get everything done. Yeah. Lauren, you sound like a brilliant dynamic woman and you're 28 and there's a part of me that always I think it's a great age 28.

So don't forget that. Because even though you're really stressed and you have got so much on, late 20s are a really amazing time as a human. Add on another 10 years or so and another 20 years and everything starts to hurt even more, Lauren. So maybe appreciate this wonderful time that you're at. And you are obviously achieving big, working, doing university placement. and the physiotherapy so much on your plate there. But how wonderful. Maybe sit back a little minute and look at that and go, I am freaking brilliant. I am doing all these incredible things. Look how capable I am. Look how strong I am. Look how much I can get through. So first of all, appreciate yourself, Lauren, because you're amazing. Okay, you're doing a hell of a lot there. And in years to come, you'll look back and go, God, I was so cool. But you might not give yourself that. moment right now because you're just busy surviving and getting through it. So just take that on board that you are brilliant and that you're balancing a hell of a lot. Joe, you're probably

right. It's probably the planning is a good thing, isn't it? Yeah. And are you getting any time to just sit sometimes? We talked about it with Dr. Rongan. You know, it seems impossible sometimes to give yourself any time because there's not enough time in the day. Yeah. But it is so important. And whether that is five minutes to yourself in the morning, if that's 10 minutes having a cup of tea and making some notes, I always find that getting out of my head onto a page is really good. So whether that's a list of notes in my phone or a book next to the bed where I'm like, right, I could do that and I want to do this thing and I want to do that. And perhaps not putting too many things on a list. You always talk, Joe, about eating the big frog. The worst thing,

you're dreading doing that thing first. And I'm not one of those people who does like a massive big hike, but I will find if I just walk down to the seafront, which is 10 minutes, it is 10 minutes down there, breathing and out, come back. Oh my God, I can be so much more productive. And I feel, you know, just that breathing is so important. When you're struggling, sometimes you're just, you lose sense of calm and it's the calm that you need to help you cope with the busy schedule that you've got. So it's, yeah, like Zoe says, just either being outside, breathing in some air or sitting down having a cup of tea, which again, we have talked about before, but it's, it's, it's, it's, It's really important.

And there are lots of things that I've learned to do. Like I do my, I do a Pilates app, which I do at home. I don't then panic about, well, I won't get to the class because it's over there and I can't cross town. It's like, I've got a little app. Yeah. On my phone, it's 20 minutes. I've also, you know, I love the Calm app.

The Calm app has helped me so much through the years. They do daily meditations, which are 10 minutes. I used to tuck myself into bed. I was doing this during the breakfast show. Tuck myself into bed. literally pull the duve over myself, put on the 10 minute app and the calm app and I would just listen to this little meditation. Sometimes I would fall asleep and have a little power nap. Sometimes I would hear it.

And then that was just 10 minutes rest and it just stops you think about everything else. And you can hear those thoughts coming in and out of your head. And it's amazing just that 10 minutes afterwards, you can jump up and you're ready again. You're really energetic. And it's a good gifting yourself that time. So yeah, try that. see if that helps, Lauren. I tried to do the gratitude thing today.

I was, because I was feeling quite stress. Oh, did you? And I thought, right, okay, I'm worried about so many different things because everything's coming back into my life. And I've had the little bubble of Christmas. And now all of a sudden, I've got to get out there again. And so I was panicking. And I thought, right, I'm going to do the gratitude.

What am I grateful for? And I started to do it. And then I just don't understand how it works. Because I was like, I know I'm grateful for my kids. I know I'm grateful for my family. I know I'm grateful for my job. But I'm still really worried and anxious. So I'm not entirely sure I've got the handle on it.

yet, but I'll persist. You know, we'll work in different ways, and it might work for some people and not for others. I think it's just simplifying things sometimes. And in a way, gratitude is just giving yourself a little bit of time. Okay. It's sort of, because I think what you're trying to do is change your brain thoughts. And you're trying to go over there and go, that's really good. That's really lovely.

And isn't that wonderful? So there are three things that are really, that are wonderful, you know, that might be. My kids, my health, my warm home, my duvet, whatever it is, just those little tiny things. And you're just, I think you're just breaking the brain path. I was feeding the cats at the time and then pulling back the curtains and doing about three other things. Maybe that was not what I'm supposed to be doing. That's what you're doing. You're multitasking.

And, yeah, and that's what everybody does. But yeah, we will get Joe Wiley to understand gratitude. We will. Just to watch this space. And on that point, I think we'll take a quick break. If you'd like these episodes, ad-free, become a subscriber to the Potting Shed. You'll get ad-free and early episodes. But most importantly, you'll be supporting the show. Thank you.

To subscribe, head to digipod.com.com. Or tap the link in the show notes. Can I also just make it? I have to make this point. Yeah. On behalf of my parents, they'd like everybody to know that they are alive and kicking, and they're doing okay. They're just a bit slower than they used to be.

My dad called me a shit this weekend because he'd watch the podcast. I was like, oh, my dad doesn't really swear very often. So I felt properly told off. So anyway, yeah, they're fine. They're doing okay. They welcome all visits and all the shepherd's pies that keep coming their way. But they're actually all right. I did feel for you.

I wanted to get it. It's difficult because, you know, sometimes on the, on the socials, we put out little clips of the podcast. And a lot of the things we talk about are bigger conversations. And sometimes you get those little clips. And then some people are like, oh, I can't believe you're being like that about this. It's like this is a bigger conversation. And, you know, I know you love your mom and dad so much.

And also in families, there is often a lot more going on than can meet the eye for all of us. And we share a lot on here. And I know our lovely diggers share with us. Yeah. But often there is more to it all. Yeah, we can't share it all. I was going to jump on and defend you last week. But I thought actually, so many people commented on how they'd had difficult Christmases.

or they appreciate some of the things that we have been talking about. We've discussed. Our parents getting older with our families, with crisis, with grief, with so much that we're all living with, everybody has. And we try to sort of shed a light on some of these things. And so, you know, Joe, I'm really proud of you for talking about lots of things you talk about because it's, you know, it's good that we have these chats. And it's good that other people feel heard and seen.

I think the wonderful thing about this podcast is the sense of empathy that is coming. from everybody who listens to this podcast, the amount of conversations you and I have and our guests as well. And then everybody piles in and they're like, oh my God, I feel seen, I feel heard. This has been my experience. And I really care and I'm really grateful for somebody discussing this thing. And there is just so much warmth and empathy from all the diggers, from all the people who listen to this podcast.

I think that's the greatest thing about it. And thank you. I do feel really privileged that people share. So, you know, some really heartbreaking stuff with us. With both of us. People are going through so much. Yeah. Yeah.

It really are. And also we talk about cock rings. You know, we've got the light. You talk about cock rings. I don't talk about them. I am obsessed with cock rings. No, I'm not. Now, as ever, you've been in touch, which we love.

We love our voice notes. And this one is from Leila. Hi, Zoe and Joe. I loved your episode on mum guilt and imposter syndrome. As a triplet mum, I experienced such intense mum guilt. My boys are three now. But when they were newborn, the mum guilt was just horrendous. There was never enough.

to go around. Love that you're talking about these taboo topics and encouraging us to do whatever fills our cup. Also, I'd love to send you guys a little thank you. So let me know where best to send it. Keep doing what you're doing. Absolutely love it. Thank you, Leila. Layla, thank you for our fuck mum guilt t-shirts, which we frippin' love and have worn with pride much to the comments of my children. And you are a mum to triplets. How incredible. are you? Oh my goodness me. My brother has twins and I always thought I love my pop in Elizer. I love them so much. But I remember when he told me he was having twins, we were all like, oh my goodness me, you're going to be okay. So I know how difficult it can be

with two, yet alone with three trying to be a mum to three babies. That is quite incredible. What a lass you are, Leila. Yeah, thanks Leila. I've got the t-shirt turned up and I was like, oh my God, this is genius. Where did this come from? So, Leila, thank you. And the imposter syndrome, I mean, there are lots of people going back to work after having time off work. And you work, whether you're a teacher or whatever your job might possibly be, you walk into that office or you walk into that workplace. And you just have those thoughts of, I'm simply, I don't know what I'm doing. But actually, you can do it because you've been doing it for quite a long time.

So, yeah, Leila, you and everybody else in the same boat at the same time. So, yeah, I'm glad we reflect that. And do please always get in touch. Show notes is where you head to. if you want to leave us any kind of message, whether you want to leave a voice note or send us whatever your thoughts are. Just head to the show notes. It's all there. And you can always do it anonymously. You don't have to tell us your name. If you've got, you know, really sensitive, emotional stuff you want to share with this.

You don't have to give you a name. Give someone else's name if you like. We really appreciate all the messages we have the funny ones and the sensitive ones and the moving ones. We also spoke to Dr. Rangan about talking to strangers and so many people got in touch. Gaynor Deacon said, I'm famous for talking to anybody. It comes from my mum. also my Welsh and Lancashire background helps. I'm working on the young man who is behind the counter at the local garage where I get my takeaway coffee.

He doesn't want to talk to me, but I am not giving up. I'm getting through. I wasn't improv while because I was ill and when I went back for a few days, he asked how I was. That is so lovely, isn't it? That is so wonderful. I have to say the lady who works in the garage at the end of my road gives me life. She is so funny. Whenever I go in there, she's always got a gag.

she cheers everybody up. She is one of my favorite humans. I don't know her name. I need to find out her name. Sammy T. 72 commented, I had the most amazing conversation with a stranger yesterday. She asked if it was okay to sit next to me

on the bench in the sun. 45 minutes later, made my day. Isn't that incredible? Because you're just thinking, oh, if you need that space, I won't sit there, and then you just get talking and you sort of learn so much

about a complete stranger and that could really have turned the day around for both of you. So that's beautiful. Coco the other day said that she had had a conversation with her headmaster. And he's been at the school for, God, I don't know, a year or so, maybe a longer. But he was making a cup of coffee while she was making a cup of tea somewhere. And she's incredibly social. She would talk to anybody and everybody. But it's not very common, I don't think, to talk to your head teacher because they're like these figures of authority.

And she said, oh, I saw my head teacher. and I just said to him, how are you today? And he said, oh, I'm doing, I'm doing okay. I'm about a five out of ten. No, she said to him, what are you out of ten? I'm a seven out of ten. And he went, well, I'm a five out of ten because it's hard being a headmaster sometimes. And then they had this whole conversation about how you feel on a daily basis.

And she said, at the end of it, I said, sir, I hope you have a better day tomorrow. And I was like, oh, my God, I'm so proud of you. What a great thing to have done. Just talk to a head teacher like they're a human being, which they absolutely are. and they have really, really hard jobs to do. They really do. They have to make so many terrible decisions, don't they have to be so hard? Yeah, deal with so much stuff.

Yeah. Yeah. And your girl, Coco, she's a cracking lass. Showing him a bit of empathy, I think, which is very, very important to do on a daily basis. Sue 1084 says, I used to work as a supermarket checkout assistant. And many people that came through to my lane lived on their own. I was probably the only person they would speak to all day. So I would always take those extra few minutes to have a chat.

I'm retired now and actually miss my job and some of my lovely customers are still in touch. Oh, it's wonderful. It costs nothing to make someone's day with a smile, chat. And how are you? Just like Coco did with headmaster. Thank you, Sue. My mum and dad used to run the village post office and shop, as I've mentioned before. And when they stopped doing that, I know my mum found it really hard just to not be a part of people's lives.

And suddenly your life was just the full walls of your house. and whoever came in. So yeah, it's an important part to play. So thank you, Sue. Our final comment is from Friend of the show, Die from Somerset. Hi, Joe and Zoe. It's Die from Somerset and just wishing you both a really happy new year. I just listened to the latest podcast and Joe, I was reminded of the last Christmas of my mum's life. She was a wonderful woman and spent every Christmas traveling around, you know, between her three kids, going to spend time with them and all her lovely grandchildren. And she did this with great grace, you know, sometimes pushed into bedrooms that probably weren't appropriate for her. And she was always worried about putting somebody else out.

But she came and she was always great fun and very generous and we loved her dearly. The Christmas, just before she died, she was a very much. 90 years old and she had decided that she was tired and she really didn't want to go away for Christmas and she wanted to spend it in her own home. Us three kids were a bit upset and very concerned and thought, oh my God, you know, she can't spend Christmas Day on her own and one of her lovely neighbours who lived just up the road said, look, die, don't worry. You know, she can come to us for Christmas lunch. She's very comfortable with her. She's very welcome. And I will make sure she has a good time. So that's what happened. And I remember FaceTiming her and she was having

a ball and it made me realise that sometimes she just really did need to be with her own friends, you know, and not always travelling long distances to be with us. And she had a great day. And I think, you know, when Jo, you said about your parents finding it difficult to get around your house, it sort of reminded me that sometimes she wasn't. always as comfortable as she could be. Very sadly, she died a week later. I think the tiredness was all a sign that, you know, her body was starting to fail her.

And on New Year's Eve, she went out, she put a coat on, went out to feed the birds, and just slipped away in her garden. Her garden was her pride and joy. She loved all the wildlife that visited it. So it really was. for her, the perfect Christmas and the perfect death, which might sound a bit creepy, but to her, she was where she wanted to be.

And although we couldn't be there to say goodbye to her, it just felt that that was where she needed to be. As you can probably tell, my voice is cracking a bit. I feel very emotional about it all, even though it was five years ago. And I miss it dreadfully. Anyway, hope that 2020 is a great year for everybody and hang on to those people that you love and let's make this a good one. Thanks for now.

Bye. Oh, die, what a gorgeous message. Well, that's it. But everything you'd share there is your mum sounds like one amazing lady. And, you know, I often talk with my family about I joke in my kids about having comedy death because I'm like, can I have a comedy death and it won't be sad, you know,

and the piano falls on my head and everyone will be like, that's the way she wanted to go, you know, or something. But what a beautiful story that she was out feeding the birds. And that's so lovely. So lovely.

And, die, yeah, those memories are wonderful, aren't they? Yeah. Those memories of them. And, you know, hearing you say, how much you miss them five years later. Yeah, it's, I'm with you there totally. We miss our lost loves, don't we? So, so much. Thank goodness for having them in our lives and everything they bring into our lives. Oh, my lord. All of you who listen to this podcast, your stories are beautiful and die. What a privilege that you get in touch and you spoke so eloquently about

your mom who you love so much indeed. And thank you for understanding where I was coming from and sharing what it was like for you. I really, well, we do. We all really, really appreciate it. Thank you. And she sounded wonderful and much, much loved. And wherever you're listening, if you are having a big old cry now, do you know what? Sometimes it's a really lovely thing to have a good cry. You know, I went to see Hamnet and that really made me cry. And that was so good and died. You just spoke with such love there. And I think we all felt that. It was really wonderful. And here's to your beautiful mum. And you're right. Here's to a, special year. And thank you for sharing with us, Di. Yeah. Thank you. And that is it. As I ring out

my hanky. But of course, you know, if like Di, there are things that you want to share with us. We, we really, really, it's important to hear from you. Show notes are where you get all the information about how you can do that, how you can share the stories about things that are going on in your life. But we'll end it there today. If you want even more answers or questions, then become a member of the Potting Shed, and you will get longer episodes where we can deal with all these things. We're looking at doing a sleep special soon because we're sort of picking up lots of our diggers struggle with sleep. So we would love your questions on sleep. If you have trouble sleeping, or perhaps you have had trouble sleeping in the past, and you've learnt some different ways of dealing with it. We would love to hear from you.

My mum has a lot of trouble just with chronic pain trying to sleep and get into the right position. I know lots of people who have had various operations from what. whatever reason it might be. Sleep and how you manage to that, how you literally get into a bed, how you sleep throughout the night is actually a really big issue. So that is the kind of stuff that we would like to hear from, please. Details on how to subscribe to the potting shed

and how to get in touch are all there for you in the show notes. We will see you on Wednesday. Goodbye. Digit is a Persephoneica production.