Dig It with Jo Whiley and Zoe Ball - DIG IN: I Love That Throbbing Feeling

Starting point is 00:00:00 Coming up on Digit, I had to host a big breakfast of my arms out because they were in agony. Never waxed them since. I love that throbbing feeling. And I found it really traumatic. I just, I cried so hard. Couldn't breathe because I was crying so much. I just couldn't bear the thought of the family dynamic changing. Do you know what?

Starting point is 00:00:18 I can't believe that people listen to this and back on stuff that we do and say. That's really made me so happy for all the reasons. All of that's right after this. Hello diggers, welcome to dig in. Hello, Joe. Hi, nice see your face again. Lovely to see your face. I'm okay. Have you remembered? It's the 21st of September. It's Earthwind and Fire Day. Any excuse to play that song. Any excuse to listen to that song. It's the one day that it was written about. I wonder going back in the history of Earth Wind of Fire, why the 21st of September was so important to them. I must look that up. Somebody must know somewhere. I'll find out. Also, how is it already? the 21st of September. Also, can I point out a really funny meme that made me laugh? And it was, I said, sweat of weather, sweat or weather, not sweatier weather. It's too hot for September. I don't like it. I need to be getting into my winter woollies. I want to eat stews. I want to like the fire. It's, no, you can do that in November and not December. In London, it's like 24, 25

Starting point is 00:01:30 degrees. I don't want this heat anymore. Yeah, but September often is, Indian summer. I'm over it. I like a season change. I like it on the day. I want to be warm. It's autumn equinox. It's happened. I want to be cold. If you're loving Diggett so far, hit follow or subscribe and that way you'll get brand new episodes as soon as they're out. First of all, shall we kick things off? We've got a question from Helen who says female body hair. Let's talk about this. Who decided that men can grow what they want when they want, but when a woman does it, it's seen as unfeminine. This is proven by the fact that when musician Phoebe Bridges was pictured at the Venice Film Festival with hairy legs, it was actually made into a headline. Like, people were talking about it like it was a thing.

Starting point is 00:02:19 Wouldn't it be just amazing if the perception of women's body hair was exactly the same as men's? It would save us a hell of a lot, more time and money. Would love to hear your thoughts, ladies, and that's from Helen. Yes, Helen. Where do you stand with this? Well said, do you know what? I used to tidy myself up, and I actually like, my new song is, let it grow. let it grow, la la la.

Starting point is 00:02:41 I was like, I can't be. Well, firstly, the good thing is, as my eyesight goes, as I get older, I can't see how hairy my armpits are. That is genuinely a thing. It is a thing. And also, on my legs, I can't be bothered to, I shave them and I blink and they've grown again. So I kind of, I, my lovely mate, Sammy, staying with me.

Starting point is 00:03:01 She's been my roomy sometimes. And she was saying, oh, you know, you've got to shave every other day. I was like, who bothers to shave every other day? That's another thing I love about the seasons change. I'm going to be wearing trousers. I'm going to be wearing long socks. I'm going to be wearing tights. I don't have to shave my legs anymore.

Starting point is 00:03:17 Arm pits I do once a month, possibly. Area, lady area, I do if I think I might get lucky, which is not that optimal. I don't know. Mine has just literally stopped growing. I think we said this before, but underarm hair is a thing at the past, which is fantastic. When does it stop growing? I want that to happen. I don't know.

Starting point is 00:03:38 I think maybe, maybe I had it waxed because I was very religious about having it waxed all the time. Your armpits? No. You just normal. I had that done once when I was hosting the big breakfast and I had to host the big breakfast and my arms out because they were in agony. And I've never robbing. The throb. Oh, my God.

Starting point is 00:03:56 Never waxed them since. Oh, no. I used to really like that. I love that throbbing feeling. It was very red. So I think I just wax it so much that now there is no hair and that goes for pretty much everywhere, apart from on my legs. And I do think as a fairer person,

Starting point is 00:04:11 I have it a lot easier. I can see with my girls who are darker than me that it does bother them. And they do shave and they do care about getting rid of the hair. But hopefully, you know, they can be liberated by seeing people like Phoebe Bridges, who is extraordinarily cool, not caring. And Julie Roberts as well,

Starting point is 00:04:27 do you remember when she was at a film premiere and she had armpit hair? Why would you not have armpit hair? I know. Everything has changed so much. Because when we were younger, you just didn't have hair. It was not the done thing.

Starting point is 00:04:38 So I think we're conditioned to try and get rid of it all the time. Even now, my legs are a bit hairy and I'm thinking, I really would prefer not to feel the hair. I would prefer them to be nice and silky smooth. And that doesn't make any sense at all, but it's how I feel inside. I don't know. I'm very much Phoebe Bridges these days. And I love that she's just like, who cares?

Starting point is 00:04:59 No one's the goddamn business. Everyone has to have hairy legs. I feel like there's so much else to worry about. shaving my armpits of my legs is one thing that just goes by the by. And, you know, I do, I did actually go and have my walrus face sort of threaded the other day. And by one of the lovely, lovely lasses at brow, what's it called brow? Blink brow bar. It took her about 25 minutes to do my furry face. What was that? That was the sideburns and the moustache and the beard. The goatee. The goate. Because, hey, oh my God. The sun, I think, you know, just having been out in the sun, I had got furrier face. I'm more concerned about my furry face than furry legs and armpits. The rest of them, let it grow. Face does need a bit of tending now again, I will say.

Starting point is 00:05:48 Women get hairier and men lose their hair. I mean, where is the sense in that? But body hair is still an issue for the men in my life as well. Like Steve, when we go on holiday, oh, is he going to kill me for saying this? Anyway, he gets really obsessed with his arm hair and his shoulder hair. So we will have this thing where he'll get the VET out. It used to be called IMAQ back in the olden days. Now it's called V.

Starting point is 00:06:12 Still smells the same. No matter how much they say, it doesn't smell. It stinks. It does. And he'll be like, please, will he do my arms and my shoulders? And I'm like, no, no, Steve, you know that doesn't happen between us. I will never do that for you. So then we have to get India in who loves it.

Starting point is 00:06:27 She loves, loves, loves getting hair and squeezing spots. So she'll come over and she'll do her dad's shoulders and arms. But then we always have the thing of where do you stop? When a man's got hairy arms, it's like he's like he's got sleeves. And it's really difficult. He's going to love you for this. Yeah, yeah. Well, some men are hairier.

Starting point is 00:06:46 Yeah. Where do you take it down to, the forearm? I'd actually prefer if Steve did have hair all over his arms and shoulders. I find it more attractive than being silky smooth in a man, to be honest with you. But for him, it's something he has to do. If any man ever asked me to do hair removal, I'm up for it. I've got my wax strips. I'm like, yep, sure, I'll do that.

Starting point is 00:07:06 I kind of love it, especially when you get to pull the wax off. I'll do that for anyone who's asking. I am very like India as well. I am happy to squeeze a spot. I'm happy to do nostril hair, ear hair. I do trim eyebrows, squeeze spots in ears, squeeze spots in backs. I love all that stuff. I'm like a monkey.

Starting point is 00:07:26 I am so simian. I am basically a beast. And I love that. I love that stuff. You and I think India is probably your daughter, feral weeing, squeezing everything, all this hair obsession. She's so like you. Oh gosh. Yeah, I know. It's funny, isn't it? How different siblings are as well. I just, I love that. How, you know, our kids will take certain traits from us, but then they've got their own ways about things. And you think, how can you be my daughter? And everyone's different. Like, yeah, Cass has more body hair.

Starting point is 00:07:56 Jude has no body hair at all. We've always had a thing about eyebrows. And I'm just like, girls, don't touch your eyebrows. Maybe the strands in the middle, but don't go too much in the middle. But let your eyebrows just be natural. And I think they're both going in that direction now. It's just all about having nice thick brows, which is a really, really lovely look. Speaking of body hair, do you remember we had Janine when we were talking about bikini waxing before? And she was a waxer herself.

Starting point is 00:08:20 And she sent us a voice note telling us not to worry about getting nude. She was like, we've seen it all, strip off, it does not matter. So that was her message before. Well, she's been back in touch. And she said, I just listened to your podcast about change and how people change in their lives. And I thought I'd write in and let you know about my big change this September. Zoe, you'll relate to this. I'm starting the RHS Level 2 course in horticulture in two weeks time at one garden in Brighton,

Starting point is 00:08:46 which, Zoe, do you know? I do know it. It's beautiful. You know that place. It's near Stammer Park, this really lovely garden centre. It's amazing. Amazing. Janine said, I've always loved gardening.

Starting point is 00:08:57 and I was actually inspired by your podcast a while ago about changing careers. I'm a bit nervous, but if you don't give these things to go, you will never know. Do you want to say the line? Janina's gone from. From bushes to bushes. That's the one. From pruning to pruning. Oh, I'm so proud of you, Janine.

Starting point is 00:09:14 It's a big step to do something like this. But you're absolutely right. Give it a go because you might love it. I haven't met many people who've changed to gardening and not loved it from whatever they're doing and are constantly meet diggers who have made that change and they are all loving it, whether it's gone from office work or, you know, teaching or, you know, some crazy high-powered job or like Janine, you know, pruning men and women to a career in gardening and you're in the great outdoors and you're learning about nature. I just, I kind of think if I ever had a career

Starting point is 00:09:49 change, that's what I would do. And that may well happen, you know. Oh my God. I can't wait for a our gardening company when it comes out. Yeah, and let us know how you get on. And, you know, if you need someone to wax in the meantime, I'll find you. Next up we have a question from Kat. She says, my daughter left for her first year of uni on the 11th of September. Although I'm proud and excited for her, my feelings are bittersweet as I will miss her terribly as well as worry as she navigates life on her own. I'm sure I'm not the only day. I'm not the only day. with this happening at the moment. And as you both have older kids, I wonder what advice you might give to a mum who find herself in this situation, partly dreading, partly celebrating this new

Starting point is 00:10:41 milestone, the one no one really prepares you for, much love from Kat. Oh, Kat, we have both been in this place, haven't we, Joe? Yeah, it's really hard. I think people are talking about it more now. I remember when India went off. Nobody had prepared me for that at all. I hadn't heard anybody else talking about it. And I found it really traumatic. I just, I cried so hard. Couldn't breathe because I was crying so much. I just couldn't bear the thought of the family dynamic changing of her not being in the house anymore. And yeah, I just had such bad panic attacks. And I'm better at it now, but still dreading it. You know, Coco's going off to college next year. She's in her final year. And I'm, I think about it all the time about, oh my God, when she's not here, like, it'll be so

Starting point is 00:11:25 awful. And we all kind of, we all want the best for our children. We can all be very, very, big about it and magnanimous and say it's amazing and it's a great adventure and I really want them to experience these things, which from the heart are very genuine, but at the same time, you're going to dread it and it's going to be something to get through and it's weird. But they do come back. That's what I'd say, Kat. They do come back. I see India all the time. I see Jude all the time. I see Cass all the time. And it's that boomerang thing. You let your kids go and they come back. And it's absolutely fine. It's never as bad as you imagine it's going to be. Yeah, I think the initial month is the hardest, knowing they're going, getting them ready to go and then going. And they're scared too because they're going to have to walk into a place and make new friends and be brave and take risks and you just want them to be safe and you want them to meet new buddies. And they do and they thrive. And they thrive because they know that you're there for them if they need you. And they're going to need washing done and they're going to need. And they're going to need washing done and they're going to need.

Starting point is 00:12:27 need, you know, advice and they're going to check in. And that might get a little bit less and less. And it's, I always think it's harder for parents because you're the ones at home. You know, I, Woody went off and I'd often be found crying on his bed, you know, and I still miss him. He still has a bed at mine that he's very rarely in. Yeah. But when he does, you know, this week, I was telling everyone the last week how he got stranded in Amsterdam and who does he call, he calls his mum. He calls his mum. And so that is the thing. They're always going to need you in a slightly different way. And Kat, I send you so much. I've got lots of friends whose kids have gone off to uni this year. And it is, empty nest is a big thing. And it is tough to get through,

Starting point is 00:13:12 but you will get through it and you miss them. And, you know, aren't we lucky to have kids we miss rather than, oh my God, are you here still? You know, it's a time, it's a time of adjustment. I think practically, just because you can feel a bit lost. I remember walking around the house and just were like weeping every time I walk past India's room. I think filling the house with noise. Getting some comfort from the radio is a really, really good thing to do. Or just listening to music, having the TV on, just some kind of a distraction, meeting up with friends who are in the same situation or just going out and doing something,

Starting point is 00:13:46 you know, going and doing something sporty, going out for a walk. Just keep yourself occupied. Do stuff, try stuff that you don't normally have time. Yeah. So if you don't have time for normally, just go, oh, actually, I can go to the gym. I can meet up with that friend. I can, I don't know, go and join that club. I can go to the cinema. Just be busy. Be busy. Keep things lively around the house. Keep it noisy. Yeah, that really helps. Don't wallow. Don't wallow. Although you are allowed a bit of following. You've got to have a little bit of wallowing. Yeah, you can cry. But yeah. And just, and hopefully they'll check in with you. I have to say my kids are much better at checking in with me than I ever was with my parents. I left home and that was it. I just, I didn't go. home. I didn't call home. I was, you know, I was hopeless. So when I'm giving my kids a hard time about checking in, I always think, I can't, I'm pretty hypocrite. But now I realize, and I've sort of said to my dad and my stepmom, die, I'm like, I'm so sorry that I didn't check in more back in the day, because I really was just like, way, life is out here. I think also having a house where they know

Starting point is 00:14:48 they can come back to and they're going to get fed and they're going to get washed and they're going to get loved and that you're going to go and buy them pants or whatever it is that they need. You can also go and visit them. Yes. Take them for food. Yeah, for them as well. It's nice to know that in three weeks time or four weeks time, whenever the time is right,

Starting point is 00:15:03 that they're going to have a weekend visit from you. And you can have a lot of fun together. And you can stock up their fridge and you can buy them whatever they need. But it's good for you both to have that to look forward to, just little milestones that keep you going. Yeah, I remember my dad coming to Manchester and just taking me out for some food because you're broke as a student that's the thing

Starting point is 00:15:22 you've never got any money and you're living on very weird food that you can put in your fridge you know and soup and hummus and rice what are you talking about much than pot noodles

Starting point is 00:15:33 but although I did quite like a pot noodle loud again they're very similar but it's quite a nice thing I remember my dad come in and being like shall take you for dinner and he take me to a pub

Starting point is 00:15:42 like oh my God a meal yeah a really good meal King and Queens in Brighton we used to go to my dad used to take us there I remember that so well. It's such a good thing. But obviously, you don't want to be rocking up on their doorsteps every weekend.

Starting point is 00:15:54 They'll let you know when that works for them to get a quick hug and take them for a pub lunch. Brilliant. It's the important stuff, yeah. After our dig-in special with relationship expert, Karen Doherty, Rebecca sent us this lovely message about later life love. She said, my mum lost her husband in their 70s. One year later, she was out shopping. She bumped into a guy that she worked with 25 years before. His son contacted Mum on social media and set up a coffee date, which moved on to an evening meal date.

Starting point is 00:16:30 Then lockdown happened and things kind of sped up. He moved in with her. They made their life plans and they got married as soon as the world opened back up. It's just the most beautiful lockdown love story. Mum was in her early 70s. He was in his late 70s. And that is from Rebecca. I love that story.

Starting point is 00:16:48 Doesn't that give you faith? Doesn't that give you hope? Oh, it really does to find. someone later on in life because you just want people to be happy. You want people happy and you want it's it's a lovely thing to have someone to share your, share your life with if that's, you know, some people never quite get over the love of their life and are happy to just be with friends and stuff like that. But if you are looking for love, don't be put off by your age because, you know, you could find someone out there. And that what a lovely wage, they just ran

Starting point is 00:17:18 into each other after 25 years and some good work from the kids there. I love that. The kids going, right, I'm going to message and we're going to get you two together. That's gorgeous. Thank you, Rebecca. No, it's wonderful. Because it can be very lonely, can it be in later life to see the later part of your life. So the idea that people actually find love and happiness together is just the nicest thing in the world. And finally, Claire sent us this voice note about a funny digger interaction she had recently. Hello, Joe and Zoe. It's Claire here from Kendall. I work in Kendall and I took the dog for a and on the way past the book shop,

Starting point is 00:17:55 I thought, I'm going to call into Waterstones and I'm going to get that book that Joe recommended the Smolin on the podcast. I couldn't remember the name of it. I couldn't remember who'd written it, but I remember what you said it was about. So I walked straight through the door with the dog, went straight up to the young guy on the cash desk,

Starting point is 00:18:14 and I said, I'm really sorry, but I don't know what book I want to buy, and I also don't know who wrote it, but I can tell you what it's about. And all I said was it's about Instagram and tradwives. And straight away, he said, I know the one you want. And he went to get it on the shelf, a hardback version, brought it back to me, scanned it. I bought it.

Starting point is 00:18:34 And on the way out, there was a lovely gentleman. And he just said to me, Joe Wiley recommended that one this morning on a podcast. And I put my hand on his arm. And I said, I know. Are you a digger too? So it's just brilliant So I've got the book I'm going to gift it to my daughter

Starting point is 00:18:54 because I think it's right up her street and thank you very much and it just proves that we're all out there somewhere lovely Thank you carry on doing what you're doing That's made me cry Oh God Claire I know that's totally

Starting point is 00:19:09 I love that I can't believe that people listen to this and back on stuff that we do and say That's really made me so happy for all the reasons. All the reasons that, you know, loving that Claire, you know, like me, you can't remember the name of something or what it is, but you can go in somewhere. And then just I love this now because we meet our diggers out in the wild. But now diggers are meeting diggers in the wild.

Starting point is 00:19:38 And that is a beautiful thing. Oh, Claire and Kendall, I love it up there. The book is called Yesteryear, just in case you missed us when we were talking about it before. and it's by Carrow Claire Burke. But the main thing is, it's a big hardbacked green book, and it's called yesteryear. And it's, yeah, I loved it and hopefully you will too. Send your questions, comments and rants, and any outside diggers running into diggers stories to questions at digippod.com. You can WhatsApp us on 0747-038795 or slide into our DMs on Instagram at DigitPod.

Starting point is 00:20:14 It's really, really nice to hear your voices. some people you'll be thinking, oh, no, I'm too shy. I can't possibly do that. But it's really nice. We chat away. It'd be really nice here, you chatting away as well. So feel free to send us your voice notes. Have a great week. Anything exciting going on? Just work. Work. Loving it. Lovely. I haven't got anything else to tell you. Sorry. No, me neither. Oh, no, I'm going to a wedding in Portugal. I am. I have got things to talk about. You're going to a wedding. Who's getting married? Owen, lovely Owen and Ziggy, who Owen looks after my gigs, my 90s anthems gigs.

Starting point is 00:20:46 So he's become a really important part of our life and Ziggy is just fantastic and they're getting married in Portugal this never happens to me it only ever happens to younger people who go to exotic weddings in other countries so it's going to be really good fun how exciting

Starting point is 00:21:01 yeah it's going to be good me Steve and Coco send some pictures and have a lovely lovely time yeah we'll do love you guys love you diggers

Starting point is 00:21:10 love you all bye yeah take care diggers same time next week have a good week Digit is a Persephonicah production.

Dig It with Jo Whiley and Zoe Ball - DIG IN: I Love That Throbbing Feeling

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