Digital Social Hour - Biggest Fears, Sean Kelly's First Podcast & Moving to America I Joel Brown DSH #423

Episode Date: April 19, 2024

Joel Brown comes to the show to talk about biggest fears, Sean Kelly's first podcast & moving to America APPLY TO BE ON THE PODCAST: https://forms.gle/D2cLkWfJx46pDK1MA BUSINESS INQUIRIES/SPONSORS: [e-mail] SPONSORS: Deposyt Payment Processing: https://www.deposyt.com/seankelly LISTEN ON: Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/digital-social-hour/id1676846015 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5Jn7LXarRlI8Hc0GtTn759 Sean Kelly Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/seanmikekelly/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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All right. Very special episode, guys. It's here today. The first podcast I ever went on eight, nine years ago. Joel Browns. He's the one who got me in this space. Man, I was so nervous that interview, dude. But I really appreciate it, man. How's it going?

That's the best way to do it, bro. It makes you pay attention. It's an important moment in your life. Your first in anything is that turning point. It's either going to inspire you to want to do it again and go bigger or you learn from it and say, Hey, you know what? I don't know if I'm going to do that anymore. And that's good because that's new information to work off. It's good. And at that age, I lacked a lot of self-confidence, honestly,

as a teenager. And I feel like a lot of guys do around that age. So that was good to kind of get me out of my shell a bit, dude. I appreciate it. Oh, I'm happy that I was a part of that with you. Yeah. And you were in the game early, man, podcasting 10 years ago. Did you see this industry taken off like it did? I totally underestimated it, to be honest. I really did not think it was going to go on the trajectory that it did. When I started, I think you're looking at like 2013. I created a website called addicted to success.com about a year or two before that. We reached so far, we're at 372 million website views. Obviously people don't look at websites as much as they used to. So our heyday was up until about seven or eight years ago our traffic still runs you know

through the site but it's not the level it was but what really helped it to to rise to the level that it did was the podcast and i think it's because when people listen to a podcast they feel like they're there with you you know it's crazy i'll be at an event speaking somewhere and someone will come up to me and they're like oh you're a vegetarian or you're they'll say something to me and i'm like how do you know and they're like oh episode 26 i'm like wow i didn't even sometimes they'll say things to me that i didn't realize i said because there's on a podcast conversation so it shows you that people listen to the podcast in their car going to the gym running errands, getting

ready in the morning. It's very personal. And yeah, it's a great way to build rapport with your audience. Interesting. I didn't know you were a vegetarian. Let's dive into that. Is that for spiritual reasons? Not necessarily. No. When I was seven years old, I went on a school excursion and we went to a dairy farm, right? And I'm a pretty rebellious person, even to this day. I don't like rules. I tend to push back on them quite a lot. It's sort of in my entrepreneurial spirit. But the teacher said, don't go over there. We need to stay together as a group. So me and two of my rebellious friends decided to jump a fence and run over to this other warehouse. And it was an abattoir, which is a meat house.

Whoa. And I saw a cow hanging upside down. It was like chopped in half. No way. Blood everywhere. I freaked out. So I came home and I said to my mom, why are they killing animals? And my mom's like, oh, it's for beef.

And I'm like, what's beef? And she's like, that's cow. I'm like, well, what's pork? And she's like, that's pig. I'm like, why do they have different's like that's pig I'm like why do they have different names for it right and it's it's actually a good question right because it's like hey we we change the name of things so we don't associate to it why we're eating it so we're not put off sorry if I put anybody up wow that's a good point yeah but but my mom's like

hey you don't need to if you want to you can have vegetarian food I was like well what's that and uh at the time she was trying lots of different dishes and she said, well, I can start making things without meat and see how you feel. So I was that annoying little eight-year-old in a restaurant that would have to ask the chef if they can take chicken out of things or beef out of things. And to be honest, I'm not as stringent now. I do have a bit of fish. So I'm a try hard vegetarian, a flexitarian, I guess I call them or pescatarian. But yeah, man, I'm not so hardcore with it now. I like to have a little bit here and there.

But I feel that it is interesting to see. Like I was part of that a long time ago. I was part of the podcast space before that blew up. So yeah, I don't know, maybe I'm pushing some curves here, trying some things before other people get onto it. And a lot that is like just uh timing in general plays a big key in success absolutely yeah i believe that too yeah yeah and that's a little bit of a luck piece yeah i'm not very big on thinking everything is is going to be built off luck i'm not very big on the whole law of attraction thing i think that some people have skewed the understanding of it

but i do believe that you want to matchwed the understanding of it, but I do believe that you want to match the frequency of what it is that you desire. But at the same time, I'm a very big advocate for the law of intention, which is set it and get it right. You had to do it with your business. I had to do it with mine. It's when you write it down, you get clear on it, you absorb your mind into it, you strategize and work out your priorities and you get into action and you just keep forging forward. Visualization and manifestation, but also actually putting in the work. Yeah. Things manifest when you show up. And I believe this, you know, as a saying, you don't get in life what you think you deserve. You get what you negotiate. Wow. And I don't believe that you just negotiate through your words. You also

negotiate through your actions. So also negotiate through your actions. So when I'm coaching my clients, sometimes someone will say, yeah, I'm doing this and this and that, and it's not working. I'm like, you're not negotiating hard enough. I'm like, what do you mean? I've said this and I've posted this content. And I'm like, yeah, but you're not actually showing up and doing the work that that goal requires for you to be in the action of in

order to attain it and so we revisit it and look at what is your priorities because strategy is just another word for priorities and a lot of people now have this thing in their hand you know their phone and they're just so distracted heavily distracted and so their strategies fall by the wayside no phone case man that's how I know you're different. No phone case. Yeah, it's got a few cracks on it. That's what happens. No, I love that, though. Sorry to interrupt.

What were you saying? No, no, I was just saying, like, I think a lot of people nowadays are just not understanding that it's going to require from you to really be disciplined, to stand out from the rest. Because, and I know we're probably going to go into this conversation around AI. I think AI is an incredible tool. I think there's some really awesome things. And I also have a concern that we're going to see more and more parroting and more and more copycat behavior. And so anyone that can practice showing up for real, they are going to be seen, felt, and understood as somebody that's more authentic in the marketplace.

Yeah. That is a valid concern, though, because you see students using AI to cheat on their tests and stuff, just copying answers and not actually learning. Yeah. I don't think we have an information issue now. We're at the point where we've transcended the depths of the information age we're moving into a very interesting age now and i think that we have an accountability problem i think people don't know how to take self-accountability and show up right i think discipline is going to be the bigger conversation that comes back in the mix like my granddad he

fought in the wars right in world war ii and another war and one of my other my other granddad he fought in the war too and i remember my granddad said to me you're a pussy you know this little kid i'm like what do you mean and he's like you don't understand hard work you don't understand what it takes you know and he's out there like gardening and growing food like fruit and everything and i was just like this guy is just grumpy and old but now i get it i'm like man he had to be disciplined in those days to support his family and to build what he wanted to build he had to overcome so much more like i can sit behind my laptop and feel comfy on my whereas he was out there in the trenches and saw some of his best friends get killed in front of him you know what i mean yeah so i don't take that lightly man my you know grandparents fought for

me to be here today if he died off and didn't have my dad i wouldn't be here right and so i really honor that and i think that you know we can easily get distracted in social media and we can get distracted in comparison. But when you're focused in your own lane and you have your own vision, you don't get distracted with what everybody else is doing and you get to work and you prioritize and you stick to it and you see amazing fruits that comes from the effort. Absolutely. Discipline and effort is so key. And I've noticed it's actually gotten harder because of social media to stay locked in. Even when I'm working now, I want to check my phone. I'm like, damn, this is such a bad habit. But that's what they're programmed to do to

you. You know what I mean? Yeah. It puts you out too, bro. I don't know if you, maybe you'll start paying attention to it like I did. I heard somebody say that you drop off 20% focus every time you look at your social media and try to go back to your task, you need to spend 20% of the time that it took for you to get into it again, to get back into traction. And if you add it up throughout the whole day, you're losing sometimes like an hour or more out of your day of trying to get back into traction. Yeah. It's nuts when you think, and that's on average for most people across the world. Some people are better at putting the phone away and putting it on airplane mode. I've had to practice it, but I've become aware of it.

And I think self-awareness is a huge key. I think that people are very poor observers. They find it very hard to observe themselves or their actions. That's why it's good to have a coach. That's why it's good to practice self-accountability because you have somebody there that can spot your blind spots and say, hey, I don't know if you know this, but you've wasted an hour and 20 minutes today on your social media. Do you know that? If that hour and 20 minutes went to two sales calls, you could

have brought $10,000 in. Absolutely. Yeah. I look at my screen time at least once a month and always find some interesting stuff and ways to save time there for sure. When it comes to coaching your students, are there any that stood out to you, powerful lessons you've learned throughout that process? Yeah, I would say there's definitely a pattern. When I can support my clients to overcome their procrastination, I see so many things shift. And a lot of people think procrastination is a time management issue. Time is only a very small fraction of it, right? And the way I look at time is time is a calibration of change. That's all it is, really, right?

The question is, what change are you creating in the time that you have? And a lot of people are wasting it. So there's not much change that's happening in their life. What procrastination is, is this. It's when you're caught between the history and the mystery. What I mean by that is if you are stuck worrying about repeating patterns of the past or you have a perceived pain of the future, you put things off. So if I can bring people back to the present and get them to reconnect with their goals, get them to heal whatever wound is going on within them, whether there's some childhood wound. And to this day, it's still like a mirror reflected in the present.

And they're associating being rejected on social media as being rejected from their father. If we can heal that and we can bring them back to the present, get them to realize today's different. Today isn't 31-year-old you who just had that massive heartbreak. You're 38 now and you're not having to repeat the past. We can do something different today. Today isn't the 7-year-old you that was criticized by your mother and told that you aren't enough or you're not good enough right so when people are brought back to the present and then they restructure

and they actually can understand that it's a lie right because what we have right now in the present is the truth it's just here the the future hasn't happened yet there's no perceived pain yet but we we do that when we fear either rejection or I'm not good enough or failure and mistakes are bad. Whatever story we tell ourselves, it's going to keep us stuck in a procrastination pattern. So yeah, I have identified, there are six procrastination types and one is the obsessive idealist, which is like the high achiever, the perfectionistist most entrepreneurs are that right you have the dreadhead which is the opposite to the obsessive idealist the dreadhead tends to be

scared to come out of the comfort zone right so they just like shrink back in like turtle back in we have the diversion junkie which chases chases entertaining distractions in high pressure times. We have the stargazer, which they're very good at visions and ideas, but they have millions of ideas, but they don't have a well thought out strategy to achieve it. And we have the radical defiant, which is super rebellious, but almost to the point where they can never build a team. They can never partner with anybody. They just try and do everything themselves.

And then they end up getting exhausted because they're constantly trying to do everything themselves. And then the last one is the angry altruist, which is the people pleaser. Wow. You know, so you can actually go to doquiz.com. It takes like three minutes. Super quick, nice and easy.

Doquiz.com and you just take the quiz. It will tell you what your type is and you get a full analysis report on how to be able to repattern that and heal those patterns from childhood or from teenhood. And you start to get into more action. What made you go so heavily into coaching? Did you have a coach on your journey and that sort of inspired it? Yeah. So I built addictedtosuccess.com right at the time. This was like 14 years ago when I started it. At the time, no one was really creating personal development websites with how-to articles. So we crushed that.

We got all the quote articles in there, all the quotes that you see online now. We did that back in the day when no one was really doing that. And I really am just a very curious individual. I used to study people like Michael Jordan. I know you're into basketball too. I got this book called Rare Air, which is Michael Jordan's biography. And I just remember studying it and going like,

what makes Michael the best, right? Because he wasn't as muscly and as big, but he was better than the other players so I was like there's something he knows in his mind you know as a young kid I just was thought laughing something he knows right and yeah man I've always just been obsessed with personal development but I think the greatest approach in business and as an entrepreneur or a content creator or an influencer is to create what you would love to create and share that with the world right it's actually quite simple a lot of time people like oh i need to really like try and understand this and that about these people and

what would be the best money move you can insert those things in and test them out but what's going to sustain over a long period is what is it that I have such a deep passion and a magnificent obsession for? And if I love it, there's going to be other people out there that love that too. Right. And your people will find you, but you got to keep showing up in it. So for me, I did that. And then I got to a point where I started getting asked to speak at events. Yeah. And, you know, I had my whole fear of public speaking that came up the first talk i did at a company it was like 360 people i almost tinned you know i ended my 20-minute speech at the 16-minute mark and then from there i realized like okay some people in the audience actually enjoyed it they

got value from it and so i decided to go all in with speaking. And the way that I became a better speaker was working through my own trauma, my own wounds of not feeling good enough. My Superman complex of trying to do everything myself. And I just fell in love with the art of transformation. I wanted to also return the favor to people because other coaches had supported me in that too. And it was like a patchwork. You know, I took a little bit from one coach and another coach. I had a breakthrough when it came to love and relationships. Another one healing my... Are you interested in coming on the Digital Social Hour podcast as a guest? Well, click the application link below in the description of this video.

We are always looking for cool stories, cool entrepreneurs to talk to you about business and life. Click the application link below. And here's the episode guys. Mother and father wound another one around like religious trauma, another one around productivity. And I just piece them together and I went, cool. I think I want to support people to do this. Wow. So I genuinely love coaching. I'm not just calling myself a coach. I love the art and craft of coaching and I train coaches, you know, I've trained over 200 coaches have been certified through me. And I love raising up leaders in the world to create impact because I've only got so much bandwidth, man. I can only do so much, you know, just like you, you got to be able to have a team or other people, foot soldiers to get out there and make an impact too. Absolutely. Wow. That's legendary, man. I want to dive into

that religious trauma actually, because I know you do post a lot about God and stuff. So where are you at in that journey right now? Yeah, man. I mean, you probably hear a lot of Christians nowadays say it's about relationship, not religion. And it's quite easy to say that. But then I do also think that even when Christians say that they still have a very deep religious binding that's happening, right? Because it's so embedded in our culture. There are some great things about religion and there are some terrible things about religion. When it comes to power-mongering, control, manipulation, the lies, things that happen in certain church organizations, it's terrible.

You've got people in every field that are charlatans, right? Not just in the church environment, but other environments too, in entrepreneurship and the coaching world and wherever else. But I'm a very big believer that if you go to the source, then you don't have to worry about the distortion. And I think that religion was a vehicle that was utilized over the top of truth, like a template that was laid over and it was scribbled over for its own agenda. And so I think us having ritualistic practices in the sense of praying, getting in the word,

praying for others, having community, all beneficial things. But when it comes to the fear-mongering aspect, we're all sinners, man. We're all fallen short of the grace of God. And who am I to sit there casting judgment and shame on somebody that maybe they haven't even had the experience of having a personal spiritual connection with God yet or a relationship with God? We all have our things that we struggle with. I know pastors that have had affairs. I know pastors that are addicted to you know, maybe not right now, but they have had that and they've had their battle with it. You

know, so, uh, I coach and I've coached thousands of people. And so you get to a point where you realize we're all screwed up. Uh, you just, some people were just trying to hide from it more than others. And I always ask like, what are you hiding, avoiding and pretending not to know? And I think that somebody like Jesus, man, like he just spoke the truth, bro. And I love that. We need that in this world today. There's so many lies. There's a saying that the truth is often surrounded by a bodyguard of lies. That's the value of truth. The truth is so damn important, right?

So it's going to have manipulation. It's going to have distortion all over it. And people are going to take advantage of it and twist it for their own agenda. Truth is so powerful. And I used to lie a lot, honestly, growing up every day. Like lying to others or lying to yourself? Both. And it took me years to break that habit dude yeah and once i broke it i i barely lie now now it's only if it i think the other person

will uh sometimes the news is a little too harsh so it's like a white lie almost okay i see yeah you just sort of soften the blow yeah but other than that i try to just be direct and some people don't like it you know what i mean some people get offended and at least I told the truth in my eyes. Well, that's good. It sounds like you overcame a wound of not feeling good enough. I felt like that for years, dude. We lie when we want people to accept us. Yeah.

But you're like, hey, I don't need to do that anymore because I already accept me. Yeah. I don't need someone to like my social media post. I already like me. Yeah. I felt like I wasn't good enough for years because this girl told me I was ugly in fifth grade. No way.

Yeah. So I didn't look in the mirror for like eight years. And my mom had just very strict standards in academics and everything. And I felt like since I wasn't doing well in school, that I wasn't good in life and business. You know what I mean? Yeah. It's so interesting, man, because we call this in the coaching world overcompensationary

success. I did it too. I'm Mr. Addicted to Success. You know, my business is called Addicted to Success. And I have a very healthy relationship with success now. I told my wife yesterday, success to me is defined in a very different way. One of the greatest achievements in success for me is not my business. It's does my wife feel loved? Does she know that I care about her? When I leave the house, does she know that she has nothing to worry about? To me, because I want to feel that from her too.

It's a fair exchange, right? And one day when we have kids, I want them to feel that love too. To me, that would be the ultimate success. To me, to maintain my relationship with God and not fear the world or fear man, but to actually have a respect for God that I trust his word over the world's word, that's a great success too because it's very hard to do that. Yeah. We were talking before this podcast about people that are just so easily bought. They brown uh they they try and get popularity votes right

because they don't want to tell the truth the truth rattles cages yep right but in the way to be able to be set free is to rattle a cage until it comes unlatched then you can leave the coop you know yeah a lot of people are stuck in cages man and i think part of what we do is we're inviting people to come out of the cage come out of of the cage, man. Come over here, try this over here. Are you sure? Is it safe? Yeah. Well, I mean, I'm standing here, it's happening, right? But we live in many cages. I call them the labyrinth, right? We live in this sort of maze. And in the business world, we're constantly told, go chase the cheese, go get the cheese, the cheese, the cheese. So we're like in this maze trying to find the cheese. And what I've found through my relationship with god in the way that even christ was teaching was like come out of

the maze completely you know he broke the matrix he carved the path through the matrix and showed a way out that's why he says i'm the way the truth and the life yeah right we need that there's no no doubt we're stuck in a matrix right now absolutely if you want to call it that it's a you know a societal construct a slave-like system and a lot of people are asleep to what's going on in the world and you don't have to have all the answers i think sometimes people can get so addicted to needing to know everything that could be a conspiracy or what is the government doing or what is this politician saying or how is this person going to get in because we want certainty that's what we want so that we feel safe if i know what's going on i feel safe uh so i would just say just go back to

the raw truth of the word man like god already told us there's over 4 000 prophecies in the scriptures right 87 of those prophecies have come true already. We only have 14% left. We are in the time of revelation. We're in the book of revelation. You know, if you look at the book of Daniel and revelation, they are cross references, symbolic and literal, metaphorical as well for us to understand where we are on the scale of time, you know, and Christ says in there, come out of her, my people. He's referring to Babylon. We know of the ancient civilization called Babylon, which was one of the greatest, which is actually in Iraq, if you trace it today. But he's saying, come out of her, my people,

come out of Babylon. What is Babylon? Babylon is Babel. Babel is confusion. Come out of the confusion, come back to the truth. We're living in so many layers of templates now from the original design that God had created that it's tough for us to see through the murky water. So interesting. I wonder if money even played a role back then because I spent six years of my life chasing it.

That was the number one priority for me, and I was so unfulfilled, honestly. And now I'm at a place now where it's like secondary it's not the main focus dude i wake up every day pumped like it's insane yeah well that's the difference between ambition and purpose you know that right so you have ambition which is kind of like this going out to the club drinking people you know might take drugs or do whatever right it's you got to get it out of your system. And then you get to a point where you're like, hey, I don't want this anymore, right? I felt like that when I first started chasing success. I had multi-million dollar success.

I had offers for addicted to success, spoken on stages around the world, stayed in penthouses that kissed the sunset, the luxury cars, all the things, man. I've lived in so many different countries around the world. I've traveled to over 54 different countries. And you know, that's cool. Great experience, but it was ambition. And when you reach this mature success, it's like a new dimension. You realize it's actually about purpose. Purpose is I don't work for my money. I make my money work for me. And my money works for me because of the systems I've created. James Clear, who wrote the book Atomic Habits, great guy. I've had him a couple of times in my groups and on my podcast. And he says something so profound. He says,

you don't rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems. Wow. Yeah. You don't rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your system. So you can write all the goals you want, but if it's not systemized, you're constantly having to like hike back up that hill every time to launch again and to repeat the process. So systemize it. That's smart. That's mature success.

I want to systemize so I can spend more time with my wife. Right. You know, my family or my, or whatever it may be. I want to systemize so I can be able to 10x my income so I can contribute whatever, 10%, 20%, 30% to philanthropic ventures. That's smart, man. That's purpose. That's what we were put on earth to do is to multiply. God already gave us all the abilities. People don't multiply because they're coming from lack and scarcity.

They don't see money as a tool that can be multiplied through wise investment. And so instead, they're constantly chasing the cheese in the maze. Chasing it, yeah. Were you sacrificing your health, your time with friends and family early on in your business career? Yes. So yes, and I think I got to do that so that I was able to realize what hard, focused work is. So I could create a contrast and weigh up at some point, which was many years ago, this is hard work, what's smart work, right? And if I can compare, like bind the two together, whenever you start a business, you know this, the first year or two is going to be hustle. It's hard work, right?

But if you systemize enough, it becomes smart work. So I needed to do that when I was younger. It actually stopped me going out and taking drugs and getting involved in all those things. My friends, I'll tell you what, man. I used to work in a sales company in Perth, Western Australia. I would hang out with my friends on a Friday evening after work and we would sit there drinking away at this bar. I went and achieved a lot of success. I'm addicted to success. My friends would say like, oh man, you're a pussy. Why don't you come out to the club?

And I'm like, no, no, I'm working on my dream. And they were like, laugh. We grew apart, different levels. But I still have respect for him, him still love him and so I came back to Australia this was about eight years later and I'm sitting in the same bar they sort of renovated it but everybody's sitting in their same seats and same spot

no way yeah it tripped me out you know like that moment where you have that moment of like realization yeah I'm sitting there

and they're talking about the same managers and the same people at the workplace no way and I look around they were all still working the same company and i was just like this is crazy and they're like joel what do you think and i said you know what i think i've come out of the fishbowl and i think you guys have been bitching and moaning and complaining about the same people uh ever since I can remember. And I said, you got three options. You either get a pay rise, so you stop complaining. You get a promotion, so you work somewhere else in the company, or you leave and you start your own business. Whatever you do, stop complaining. And I got up and I paid for everybody's pizzas

and beers. And I didn't do that to spite. I just did it because I felt so empowered. Like, Joel, you know what? You made the right decision. You went out there and took a shot. And out of the eight guys that were there, two of them came over to me and said, hey, man, I want to start my own business. I want to do my own thing. Wow.

And they have. And so it's just a good testament to show, like, at any point in time, you can make a new decision. You don't have to keep repeating the cycle. Sometimes people have their sort of local thing that they're a part of and it feels safe. But I think the biggest risk is not actually creating what's truly on your heart because that's the thing that sets your soul afire. That's purpose, like what you're living now.

That's not ambition. That's purpose. Absolutely. Yeah, once I switched to a purpose-driven life things just everything started getting better health money amen just feelings like it's great dude but it's been such a fun episode man anything you want to close off with or promote nah you know it's 2024 a lot of people uh had such a shift in their mindset i spoke to people before new year's i i was doing sales calls and bringing clients in and i told some of them like why are you going to wait till the new year right why do we do this why do we follow this calendar day you know and then we had people that jumped in after

and it was like i was talking to completely different people and i was like what's wrong with this world right now but you know i would just say act as if calendars don't exist don't be that person that waits and says like oh oh, I'll just wait till 2025 now. Just do it now. Like if you truly love something, do it because you just never know when you're going to go, right? I'm going to leave you with this real quick because we're wrapping up.

You have a 21-year-old young kid, right? In a year from now, he's going to walk out on the road in a horrific accident and get hit by a bus and die. You have a 46-year-old that dies of natural causes, dies in his sleep at 96. Who's older? Is it the 96-year-old? No.

Why? It's a 21-year-old that's going to die next year because time is a calibration of change. As I said earlier in the episode, he only has one year left in his life. The 46-year-old has 50 more years left to live. And the question that I'm going to follow up with this on is, do you know when you're going to die?

No. You don't. So we don't really know how much longer we're going to live. So why wait? Just action it today. it happen powerful man i love that dude thanks so much for coming hey man thanks for having me bro thanks for watching guys as always and we will see you tomorrow