Digital Social Hour - Sexual Communication: The Future of Good Sex I Dr. Tara DSH #462

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Starting point is 00:00:22 Merchants Bank is a proud member FDIC. I ask that question all the time in my class. And I teach sexual communication, 16 weeks of like sexuality, starting from history of sexuality to the future of sex with technology. I always ask my students like, okay, let's rate your sexual wellness now. How good is your sex life from your own opinion from one to ten people are always like well like five wow there's a lot of people that are not having good sex wow this episode is presented by ps guys are you sick of using products that aren't effective or even good for you? PS has created products for men

Starting point is 00:01:05 you actually want to use. Go to psgoodtimes.com and use discount code PODCAST10 for 10% off your order. All right, we got a sex expert here today. I'm excited to learn from you. Dr. Tara, thanks for coming on. Hi, are you having an orgasmic day?

Starting point is 00:01:19 No today, but looking to have some more. So nice. I'm about to get enlightened i think how did you uh get into this kind of work um well i'm a sex professor how i got into this kind of work is i got my master's got my phd and then you know i landed my dream job as a tenure track professor at cal state fullerton and then earned tenure as one of the youngest professors on campus. And now as a tenured professor, I started my private practice for sex and relationship coaching and started doing content and the TV show last year.

Starting point is 00:01:55 That's cool to see the university let you do this content because I feel like back then that was the kind of look down on. Yeah, well, I'm tenured. So what does tenure mean? So you're there for a certain amount of years, no matter what? That they can't fire me. Yeah, so... I didn't know that.

Starting point is 00:02:11 Yeah, the tenure system is around the world, but it's enacted much more often in the United States where you have professors that are doing research, publishing, and are teaching and doing service, like advising students and graduate students and those are typically tenure track professors and then there are like lecturers and adjunct professors that kind of just come in and teach so um in a university system like the bureaucracy or i guess the ladder that you go on that you climb is the tenure track right and then getting tenure and promotion would be what

Starting point is 00:02:46 professors um want to achieve i love that so becoming a professor was always a goal of yours when you were growing up you know no i was uh always into business i was gonna go home and back to thailand and help my family with like business but um I came to the, well, let's like, I'll start from, I grew up in Thailand. Yeah. And I grew up, you know, very religious as a Buddhist. And I was going to all girls private Catholic school. And there I was experiencing like a lot of shame towards like being a girl. And like covering my body because in our

Starting point is 00:03:27 schools you have to cover your knees you have to cover your wrists um in order to not like provoke you know men or uh be sexual yeah so like i grew up in that kind of environment but then after i finished middle school my parents um sent me to finland so i went to high school in finland and that was when i was exposed to a much more um sex positive and body neutrality uh in finland because people just get naked and go into saunas like you can see your grandpa's balls and it's fine wow yeah it's completely normal because they practice like body neutrality it's not like celebrate all bodies like we're all beautiful it's not like that it's very stoic it's very like bodies are just bodies we don't care yeah and they all go into saunas naked together

Starting point is 00:04:15 men and female yeah yeah and family so like you can see your grandma's balls and it's normal uh so that was when i was exposed to a more like sex positive, like body neutral environment. And I loved it. I love the freedom. I love the exploration. Then I came to the US and I did my higher education in the US and I first lived in LA. I love it because LA is one of the most like sexually liberated places in the world, minus Amsterdam. Right. But LA, New York, amazing. People are open to exploration, open to talking about sex.

Starting point is 00:04:53 So I was inspired. But really what truly changed my life was basically my rock bottom of getting a divorce and going through a sexless marriage. It was then I realized, like, damn, this is not the life I wanted. And I wanted to change. I want my life to be fulfilling. I want it to be fun.

Starting point is 00:05:22 I want it to be explorative. So I was like, you know, I have to get a divorce. And that was everything changed after that. I decided to experiment with like everything, studied everything. And you really just like dive into the ocean of sexuality. And here I am, you know? Yeah, here you are. We'll dive into some of those stories. But I want to talk about how you got to a sexless point in that marriage. Was it the day you got married or was it kind of a gradual buildup? Yeah.

Starting point is 00:05:53 So this is what I always want to tell people that are currently dating. Like lists don't matter. I had a list. I found a man that matched everything on that list, but we never had chemistry. We never had sexual tension and i was blinded by my cultural expectations of marrying a quote-unquote good man and i didn't think about like having that passion was going to be so important for me i just thought i just need a good man and i need to get married because i was in my late 20s and my parents are like you should get married right being asian and my friends from back home

Starting point is 00:06:25 they're all married at like 25 so you know by like 27 i was like oh i'm late i gotta get married and being someone who loves like achieving i'm like okay this is the part of my life that's not going the way that is expected so i must get married i met this guy my ex-husband on tinder and like six months later we're married damn i was fast because he checked every box but i again i was blinded to the fact that like you do need chemistry and that kind of like unexplainable attraction right which we never had yeah because you can make as much money as you can make but if you're not physically attracted to them you won't have sex so exactly and that's like sex is such a huge part of like human experience amazing sex changes everything um and when i say amazing sex it's not just like bam bam bam orgasm like it's not like

Starting point is 00:07:19 that it's very like soul based experience and i think that that changes everything. And with my current partner, with my husband, the kind of sex we have and the kind of exploration we get to do is it's unlike anything I've had. And I was a serial monogamous my whole 20s. Like I've dated so many people to know that like I have falsified all the things already. So now I know that through falsification, this is my choice. So you were a monogamous. Are you still a monogamous? No, we're monogamish. What's that?

Starting point is 00:07:52 95% monogamous, 5% non-monogamous is the easiest way to say it. We're emotionally, socially, romantically committed to just each other. So we're socially monogamous. But sexually, we are allowed to play with other people so that's so that's kind of my setup and it's always been my dream setup i just was never able to find a partner who was like on the same page as me until now wow so you can let him sleep with other women and you won't care if i'm there yeah if oh if you're yeah okay so same way with you he has to be there yes another guy yeah yeah and i'm like i'm super turned on by him like you know getting

Starting point is 00:08:33 pleasure so it's not necessarily people always ask me like how do you deal with jealousy and i honestly think like i have like a gene and i talked about this with other sex therapists and experts too like i think i have a gene that's like i just have low jealousy um and i think that there are people there should be like a more scientific study on this but i think there are a lot of people who have that gene or yeah if you were born with it it wasn't like a childhood thing that triggered i feel like i just was not like super jealous ever okay yeah wow i wish i could say the same i think i used to be very jealous but as i've matured it's it's gone away so so like right now let's do you have a partner yeah fiance yeah oh fiance congrats um how's how's your sex life been from one to ten i'd say like eight eight okay

Starting point is 00:09:23 that's amazing i love when people that have a good sex life say eight because they know that there's always like improvements and exploration if you say if you say 10 is probably fake it's cap yeah there's no one out of 10 i'm the same way when i eat at a restaurant like i'm not just giving out tens you know really there's always room for improvement okay what's a restaurant that's 10? I mean, none. You know what I mean? I'm David Portnoy out here at restaurants. Like, I don't give out 10s. Interesting.

Starting point is 00:09:49 So, yeah. When I ask that question all the time in my class, like, I teach at Cal State and I teach sexual communication, 16 weeks of, like, sexuality, starting from history of sexuality to the future of sex with technology. So, I always ask my students, my students like okay let's rate your sexual wellness now like how how good is your sex life from your own opinion from one to ten and um people are always like well like five and i realized like wow there's a lot of people that are not having good sex i think that's why i really wanted to start my social media to like spread more sex

Starting point is 00:10:25 positivity and reduce more shame and help people have better sex in general, because it permeates into like every aspect of your life. Absolutely. So a lot of people answering low numbers, what are the reasons you're seeing why their sex lives aren't good? Well, I teach Gen Zs. So with Gen Zs, I do think there are a couple of reasons why that I can theorize. And there's also research on some of them already. I think the first reason is being addicted to social media. Right. And not necessarily spending a lot of time and effort into like developing sexual connection with other people.

Starting point is 00:11:03 And that would be the first one. The second one is a lot of anxiety like when you have general anxiety you will have like tenfold sexual anxiety because you know like sex is vulnerable like you're naked your is out your is out like how can you feel even more confident in a sex sexual setting no you won't so um the general anxiety that Gen Z is feeling is affecting their the ability to establish sexual connection. And then I think the third reason is possibly, you know, technology like consumption, like overconsumption of and the inability to just develop like social relationships. I could see that. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:11:48 I mean, people are glued to their phones and anxiety is at an all-time high. So people get performance anxiety. Maybe they can't even get it up. A lot of people can't get it up. Yeah. Yeah. Like one in three men will experience. Damn.

Starting point is 00:12:00 Yeah. One in three men will experience ED at some point in their lives. So it's a normal occurrence at this point. Yeah. And that's men will experience ED at some point in their lives. So it's a normal occurrence at this point. Yeah. And that's just people that admit it. So it's probably even higher, to be honest. Exactly. And I mean, once you pass a certain age, like let's say 45, there's testosterone issue and all of those things to lead to ED. But not only ED, also low sex drive and sexual desire. you know you see a lot of older men that perhaps just don't want sex that much but what I'm seeing though is young people

Starting point is 00:12:31 experiencing ED like people in their early 20s it's really the time where your should be hard all the time like you know you're in your early 20s like from the age of 15 to like 25, like I think with young men, like, you know, all you want to do is, but there's a lot of, uh, young men that are experiencing ED due to anxiety,

Starting point is 00:12:54 but not to say all Gen Zs are addicted to their phones. You know, I teach amazing, amazing group of people. So I'm always interacting with like brilliant Gen Z and I do love them. That's so cool. Um, one of your most viewed videos on videos on Instagram was about friends with benefits. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:13:10 And I feel like those rarely work out. You're like the only person I know that's pulling it off, to be honest. So congrats. Thanks. What's your advice? Probably because of that low jealousy gene. Yeah. So your advice would basically be to monitor that jealousy aspect of it.

Starting point is 00:13:23 Because that's why they always end, the jealousy part. Right, yeah. If you're highly jealous, don't get into one. Right. Like a friends with benefits relationship is a very stoic and pleasure-based relationship. It's not like a relationally connecting relationship, you know? You're not going to be establishing like deep emotional bond. It's a friend. Like it's a friend that you really like that you enjoy hanging out with and sometimes.

Starting point is 00:13:49 So it's not necessarily a good type of relationship to pursue for anyone that experiences a lot of jealousy and anxiety. Yeah. You got to be built different for those. It creates even more anxiety, I would assume. Oh, for sure. And low self-esteem. Yeah. Because when your friends with benefits leaves you for like a different person, then that, you know, your self-esteem could be like crushed. Absolutely. Your most viewed video on YouTube is about sexual meditation. So what exactly is that? Sexual meditation is like a regular meditation practice, but it focuses on sexual thoughts, feelings, and sensations in your body. And in my guided sexual meditation on YouTube, I guide people through different types of journey. One of them is physical sensation. So it could be, you know, taking deep breaths and

Starting point is 00:14:36 then like massaging your nipples, massaging your pubic area. Another one is more sexual empowerment. So it's more like sexual affirmations like i am an amazing lover i love my cock i love you know i love my body so it's just for um they're all for sexual wellness but hitting at different points because something that experiences um something like body sensations versus um feeling good about your own sexuality is different, right? One is more cerebral. You think about it as thoughts. And another one is visceral, like body.

Starting point is 00:15:15 It's super cool to see you bringing this mainstream because sex was such like a taboo topic, especially for Asians and like just growing up. Barely anyone talked about it. Yeah. I mean, I get messages on TikTok all the time because that's my biggest platform and I get messages all the time like thank you so much I've never seen an Asian sex positive person and I'm like yeah that's true though yeah Kazumi probably the only two Asians I know talking about it yeah well you know there are other of us but like it's hard to become mainstream, either as a sex educator, or a star from our background. It's a shock sometimes, because like, I'll have, you know, Chinese fans that are in China, that DM us. And it's like, oh, you know, I've like, I cannot believe there is a Chinese,

Starting point is 00:16:06 like an Asian woman talking about these things and it helps them. It helps them feel less ashamed of their desires. It helps them feel less ashamed of wanting to pursue like, you know, sexual wellness. Yeah. And speaking of Asian men, you made a video about Asian guys and their dick sizes. oh oh where did you think i was going with that that's funny but um is it a myth or is it

Starting point is 00:16:32 true from what you've personally seen about what asian sizes asian sizes yeah um statistically speaking if you're comparing like uh sizes in asia and like let's say the men of like congo there is going to be statistical difference of the length of sizes because that's just data that's out there like you can google this it's just national institute of health data but my personal experience is i have had i have had sex with a lot of Asian men with like very nice and very, you know. This episode is presented by PS. Guys, are you sick of using products that aren't effective or even good for you? PS has created products for men that you actually want to use.

Starting point is 00:17:19 These guys have done a ton of research and it shows. They got thousands of five-star reviews across all their products, condoms to supplements. Not only that, but they've somehow found a way to make big jokes appropriate at their office. Go to PS good times.com and use discount code podcast 10 for 10% off your order. It's big. So personally, I think it's,

Starting point is 00:17:40 it's definitely how you use it rather than having the size. Because I have had sex with people that have huge *** that just didn't know how to move their hips. And like moving your hips means everything. Wow. So that saying is true. It's about the motion. Yes, it is the motion.

Starting point is 00:17:57 Well, you know, but like I'm going to be real here. Like if you have a micro ***, it's going to be hard for me to feel anything inside. That's like the one exception. But yeah. If you have like four inch. Yeah yeah know how to get it really hard you know like i can help you get really hard like then hell yeah we can we can rock and roll but like if you have a micro there are there are things that you can do giving hope to guys out here watching

Starting point is 00:18:19 love it did you did you have that sex ed class in high school i did that was a joke right well mine's probably worse than you really yeah mine was just like reproductive system oh like how women have babies you didn't have the banana demonstration did you with the condom yeah were you like oh that banana is uh i mean all the kids were laughing no one took it serious do you always use condoms i do nice even with your fiance yeah really yeah wow you're such a good boy i know right wait you don't know uh no i mean i have sex with my husband okay yeah if we have sex with other people yes yeah that's why i asked because when we explore other people yes but with my husband no okay well speaking of condoms sts are at an all-time high.

Starting point is 00:19:06 What should people do to stay protected? 100% stay protected. You have to. If you are having casual sex, there is no reason why you're not protecting yourself. Wearing a condom is super simple. It takes you five seconds to pop one in. Why not use it and protect yourself from forever something that you could have absolutely we got these ps condoms right here

Starting point is 00:19:30 yeah they're 30 thinner than uh i saw one here okay so no rubbery smell i like that because hate rubbery smell that was like the one thing that turned me off in my early 20s i used condoms back then but still i didn't like the smell is pretty strong yeah yeah um non-toxic ingredients 100 vegan love exceptionally thin don't we love that because like we gotta feel the car yeah when it's too thick if it just feels like i'm not a sex like robot yeah have you seen those male sex robot no my dad had a your dad has a male sex robot that was a weird way to word it no my dad had a female sex it wasn't a robot it was like a toy i guess yeah oh i love this packaging yeah it's pretty sleek let me see oh oh wow it's like an apple like iphone box makes you feel like a baller yeah slip into something more comfortable that's so pretty yeah i also like that it's not

Starting point is 00:20:34 too like masculine like it's it's cool like women can buy it and feel good having it in their selves you know are you big on toys and stuff i love toys yeah i love sex toys i love exploring i love um just trying different things and being you know a sex educator uh every brand sends you like a pr box so i have like 200 vibrators that's a good life right it's fun and my partner loves seeing me like come so sometimes he will just watch me use one of these tools and just like watch me come and bone and yeah he loves it there's a word for that isn't there um if you're thinking a cock that's not okay that's watching your partner have sex with someone else. Okay. But he does that. Edging?

Starting point is 00:21:26 Oh, edging. Yeah. My husband edges often. He's a huge fan of like breath work and meditation. Same. Yeah. So he will do breath work and hold his breath for a long time. And sometimes he feels like he's about to come through breath work, but then he will

Starting point is 00:21:42 like edge, like not come. What? Yeah. You can come from breath work? Oh, yeah. Lots of men can come through breath work but then he would like edge like not come what yeah from breath work oh yeah lots of men can come from breath work i've seen it many many times and my husband is one of them what's the technique because i do wim hofs yeah and you you hold your breath yeah but i don't ever get like at the end oh maybe you have to focus on your pelvic you have to like send you know energy there Interesting. So you're big on like sexual energy transfers? Oh, 100%. I'm like a, you know, because I'm Western trained for my PhD, but I'm like, I'm an Eastern girl.

Starting point is 00:22:12 So all the things that I grew up with, like all the energy stuff, superstition, like all the things, you know, from my culture and religion is definitely infused with all the stuff that I learned from the West. So I'm like a Western girl on the outside, Eastern girl on the inside. So I love both. I love that because, yeah, I truly believe when you have sex with someone, there's some energy transference. Oh, yeah. And you can like inherit some of their traumas and some of their energy.

Starting point is 00:22:37 Yeah, yeah. That's why like if I'm going to have sex, if I'm going to play with other people, like I need to kind of know who they are. Okay, so you want to do randoms um at at some point after like talking to someone i wouldn't consider them random right like you know like talking to you knowing you and like researching you like i know you a little bit you know so you wouldn't be a random okay yeah do you go to uh no i feel that i feel yeah i meant like a one night stand i guess

Starting point is 00:23:06 i've had i've had some of those in my 20s i had fun but i wouldn't say it was like an amazing orgasmic experience where i like come multiple times and squirt yeah because i love squirting but yeah i wouldn't i would say it was like the best one night stand i had was like seven out of ten damn you know do most women squirt i believe every woman can squirt okay but whether or not they want to interesting because some people are still like afraid that it's pee which i'm like who cares wasn't that busted though it's like 90 something else yeah fluids from like skein's gland yeah yeah but still even if you you know when you it out, even if there's a little bit of pee in it, you're so into it, you don't care. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:23:51 There's some pee in a pre-cum too, right? Yeah. And it's hot. Like, you know, pre-cum in my mouth, go for it. Damn. Yeah. My partner like loves, loves receiving. I give him BJ's weekly.

Starting point is 00:24:05 Wow. Yeah. I give for, for Valentine's last year, I give him BJs weekly. Wow. Yeah. For Valentine's last year, I give him BJ coupons. And he can just use the coupon. Damn. So he's just stacking those. Dude, happy husband, happy life. Nice.

Starting point is 00:24:16 What about golden showers and stuff like that? I'm down if it's in the bathroom. If we're taking a shower together, he wants to pee on me. Sure, that's kind of hot. It's warm. It's liquids from him. Okay. I'm down if it's like in the bathroom. Like if we're taking a shower together, he wants to like pee on me. Sure. That's kind of hot. It's warm. It's like, you know,

Starting point is 00:24:27 liquids from him. I'm down. I'm a freaky girl. Yeah. Yeah. My students are always like, Oh my God, Dr. Tara,

Starting point is 00:24:35 I can't believe you said that. I'm like, why not? Why not say these things? It's so cool. I like them. Yeah. It's cool to see the college not give you any slack and being able to teach no my dean the dean of my college follows me on instagram no way yeah

Starting point is 00:24:49 where do you say tara is in cali cal state fullerton in orange county i didn't know they even had a class like this in college yeah sexual communication i wrote a textbook on it damn yeah you're like the pioneer of this space kind of yeah yeah it's it's fun it's really nice to be the person that like gen z's look up to as like a role model for sex positivity because i think that it's hard to fix older people but it's easy to influence people that are younger to live the sexually fulfilling life that they deserve yeah yeah yeah that's so cool people open up and like i think a lot of girls get shamed in social media today's world at least just like high body counts what do you see you know there's so much shame just anything women related because like even me

Starting point is 00:25:38 my cv is like 30 pages long there's still comments on my videos like shut your mouth yeah i'm like you know excuse me like who are you even get out of here like it's just shame for anybody and everybody that are female and are talking about sex in a positive way which sucks because i don't necessarily want to leave these haters behind because they need help the most you know whenever i see people like canceling men right like like these fucking men they don't know what they're on well they're all they do is attacking women like cancel them cancel them like get the out of here i'm almost like on the opposite side i want to show empathy and show you there is a sexually fulfilling life where you don't have to hate women where women can where women and you can be in love and have a good relationship and

Starting point is 00:26:33 i don't want to leave these people behind like my some of my students are like do you have incels on your page and like probably and i welcome i welcome them like come on come to the come to the bright side come to the you know the sunny side life's great yeah i think a lot of the hates projection from personal experience yeah and they just want to hate from like an anonymous account if everyone's coming then the world is better yeah no it's a serious issue right now reproduction actually uh testosterone's at all-time lows yeah women, I'm seeing a lot of studies with birth control now. Have you been following that? Yes.

Starting point is 00:27:09 Yeah, that's concerning. Actually, it's interesting because there's hormone issues, but for men, I saw a recent statistic that show one-third of infertility cases is due to no sperm or like sperm health issue. Wow. Yeah. So 30% ish is due to like either lack of sperm or like sperm that can't swim. Yeah. And it's all like you're drinking your water from glass model.

Starting point is 00:27:41 It's all like microplastics and all these really unhealthy habits that we have through like 20 years like from from you know when you were a child until now so now there's a lot of men that are in their 30s trying to get pregnant didn't realize like what is wrong with us what is wrong with us like you know the woman gets tested okay maybe she does have like low amh level but like a lot of times it's men and they didn't realize it. Yeah. Yeah. No, for real. I know so many people that had issues. I measured my testosterone kind of low, to be honest. So I had to raise that. And it's like, wow, the average 25 year old man has the testosterone level of our grandparents, which is really scary.

Starting point is 00:28:21 It's tough. So what are you doing as remedies uh i'm all natural so i know there's people that inject it the trt but i'm not a fan of anything unnatural i try to be as holistic as possible that's why i'm kind of against birth control too to be honest just because there's a lot of studies now on how it's affecting their mood and all their like health so it's yeah interesting if you're tracking your period you can use that method of birth control yeah like just natural birth control yeah i think the problem is a lot of girls don't take it at the same time or whatever so it just they cycle it and then it's and like i don't know about you growing up were you exposed to like plan b uh actually no i got no pussy in high school in college so not really but my friends were

Starting point is 00:29:06 yeah my friends had some scares um so you didn't have to like do like 2 a.m plan b okay so i know that they're claiming that you know it doesn't it doesn't affect like female fertility yeah in the future but i also like i don't know if that's true you know like they have the money to bury any study against it so yeah who knows yeah because those are really harsh medicine yeah to to kill it like right then and there one pill like that's pretty harsh for your body yeah i know girls that have taken like five times and like many many times throughout their life until they were ready to have a baby and then they're like oh what's wrong with my body like yeah maybe it's all that you know medication it could be yeah i saw one of your videos uh use coconut oil yes in the bedroom i'm a big fan of coconut oil so you use it as a lubricant um yeah i use it for i use it for like my i use it for

Starting point is 00:30:07 i use it for when i give my husband a because coconut oil is antibacterial and it also like tastes a little better for me um i use it for rib jobs like damn yeah wow do you eat no not yet you recommend it what's good about it it's pleasurable there's a lot of nerve endings around the butthole so it's like it's a pleasurable body like oh in the guy right yeah well both men and women oh really yeah okay yeah yeah i love when my partner like goes down on me and then go a little further like you know do a little around around the butt yeah i i like eating his like it's it's it's a pleasurable sexual act that's very honestly like very bonding because it feels taboo and and there's nothing wrong with it when you clean it really well it's

Starting point is 00:31:00 just a skin it's just skin yeah i guess if you're showering before and cleaning it i could see it but are you going like right after a night out or you know what i mean like i think there's levels to it uh i mean i would i would be down i'm one of the i i'm really into like smell um and i'm so into his scent like his natural scent and he does for me too because we don't really shower that often what both of us i shower like once every five days whoa yeah that's the least i've heard for a girl yeah i've heard of guys doing that but well my husband sometimes doesn't shower for two weeks damn yeah you don't smell it like no it smells great he doesn't he doesn't have like bo he just smells great he also doesn't use like shampoo. It just smells great. He also doesn't use like shampoo or body wash. Okay, that I agree with.

Starting point is 00:31:49 Do you use shampoo? Yeah, but it's mostly natural. Yeah. So I try not to use the fake stuff. But why do you only shower once every five days? Because I really don't think we need to. I don't think we need to. I think that my skin, my skin is amazing. Yeah. For someone that doesn't shower. I don't think we need to i think that my skin my skin is amazing yeah for someone that

Starting point is 00:32:07 doesn't shower i don't like scrub it like i don't use all those products that are advertised for women to use right you know all the scrubs like my face i don't use facial wash like i just use water your skin does look good i will say thank you it's all natural because i just don't shower wow yeah i try to use very minimal everything yeah yeah i rent my clothes because I just don't shower. Wow. Yeah. I try to use very minimal everything. Yeah. Yeah. I rent my clothes, like, so we don't have a lot of clothes. Wow.

Starting point is 00:32:31 Yeah. Deodorant? Nope. So your armpits don't smell right now? I don't think so. Nope. Wow. You are lucky.

Starting point is 00:32:38 You must have some good genetics. I have to shower daily and use deodorant twice a day. But you use the natural ones, right? Natural deodorant. Yeah. The other ones. That was a huge study, like, finding, remember? Yeah. shower daily and use deodorant twice a day but you use the natural ones right natural yeah yeah other ones that was a huge study like finding remember like about five years ago seriously why'd you wait 20 years of my life to tell me i know when i was young i was using those like degrees yeah degree uh old spice we're probably gonna get sued or something but yeah um even

Starting point is 00:32:59 toothpaste now it's crazy well they now have all natural products obviously yeah yeah do you do you use one of those tablet toothpaste no what is that have you seen them oh is that the chewable tablet yeah and then you like put it in water i've seen that yeah but even the water like the top water you gotta dodge so many things so many things yeah i think that's why i love coconut oil because i know if people put it in food in their their coffee, in their drinks, like then I can use it in sex. Like then it can be in my pussy. Then it can be in my mouth. Yeah. Yeah. That's interesting. I actually love coconut oil. I do oil pools. So I can see that. Oh, what does that mean? You just swish it in your mouth for 20 minutes. It makes your teeth super white. Just coconut oil or like with like charcoal?

Starting point is 00:33:42 There's one I buy on Amazon. There's something in it, but coconut oil is the main ingredient really yeah it's really good for your teeth your teeth are pretty white though so thank you it's from all the with coconut oil oh so yeah you're already getting that oh yeah yeah that makes sense well dr tara has been fun anything you want to promote or close off with um just you know make sure that you take care of your sexual health because sexual health is a part of your overall wellness and wellbeing. And you go to my website. If you ever are curious about sexual exploration, learning more about your sexual profile, I have a quiz on there that you can take. If you take this quiz, then it's a good start on where to go and what kind of conversations you can have with your partners, with your dates

Starting point is 00:34:25 about your sexual well-being. Nice. Comment below what you get on the quiz, guys. Until then, see you tomorrow.

Digital Social Hour - Sexual Communication: The Future of Good Sex I Dr. Tara DSH #462

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