Dinner’s on Me with Jesse Tyler Ferguson - Gaten Matarazzo — saying goodbye to ‘Stranger Things’ and growing into himself

Episode Date: November 18, 2025

'Stranger Things’ star Gaten Matarazzo joins the show. Over sushi and cappuccinos (yes, really), we talk about his remarkable journey from child performer to seasoned Broadway star and Netflix favorite. Gaten shares what it was like to commute from New Jersey to perform in Les Misérables as a kid, the surreal audition process that led to his breakout as Dustin in ‘Stranger Things,’ and how it feels to say goodbye to such a defining project. He also opens up about living with cleidocranial dysplasia (CCD) and how he’s using his platform to raise awareness and empower others. This episode was recorded at Lure Fishbar in SoHo, New York City. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Ranger Things. It's Gaten Matarazzo. I was doing the musical The 25th Animal Pud and Kenny Spelling Bee, which I did in senior years. Did you really? I was Coney Bear myself. Shut up. Yeah, I did. This is Dinner's On Me, and I'm your host, Jesse Tyler Ferguson. The last time I saw Gaten was on stage when he played Tobias Rag

in the Broadway revival of Sweeney Todd, but I have been following his career since everyone else has, really, since he was on Stranger Things. It's Dustin on Stranger Things. I love Stranger Things so much. I could not believe how brilliantly they captured the 80s era. It was such a throwback. It's like comfort TV for me. I absolutely adore the series. And I'm kind of sad that it's coming to an end. But I'm so glad that I get to have my buddy Gaten on to discuss how impactful that show was. to him, I certainly can relate to, you know, being on a long-running show with a very tight-knit group of people. I'm tucked into a booth at Lour Fish Bar in Soho where stepping inside feels like

boarding a yacht that just happens to be serving some of the best seafood in New York City. You have to walk down some stairs to get into the restaurant. So the windows are all very high up. It's got this glossy wood paneling and these windows like portholes almost, a golden light making you feel like you're cruising in style, you know, minus the seasickness. Lura is a city institution known for oysters so fresh that chef Preston Clark taste test them daily. Clark comes from New York food royalty. His father is the late Patrick Clark, who's one of the city's most celebrated chefs, and he's also the first black chef to win a James Beard Award.

He's carried that legacy forward with a menu that sails far beyond oysters to include Whole fried fish, sushi, and seafood dishes that balance sophistication and comfort. It's the perfect place to drop anchor for a conversation with Gaten. Oh, I see him coming down the stairs. All right, let's get to the conversation. I want to make sure this is off? No, keep it on. If you have a call to take calls on them.

My favorite thing to say is like when the ushers are, you know, at the theater and they have all these signs. and they're really aggressive now. And, like, if they even see you, like, turning off your phone, they're like, turn off your phone. You're like, I'm doing it. My favorite thing to say to Anastro, though, is, like, if I'm, like, turning off my phone and they're, like, they're turning off your phone.

I was like, no, I'm expecting a call, though. I'm going to need to take the call. And they're like, they don't know what to do with that. But one time I was seeing an opera in Los Angeles that Patty Lepone and Audra McDonald were in. And my phone slipped out of my pocket, and it was behind. I was in, like, in the last row, and it was behind between my seat and the wall. and oh no

I hadn't had a chance to turn it off and I couldn't get it and like this show had started I was like I was just like all right let's white knuckle I was like pray to God it was not I was like I think it's off I don't know what happens and I had an alarm set no and the alarms will be like I'm pushing

through like even if you have an alarm set during the show I think it was for I don't know honestly I wish I could tell you Gaten I but it started to go off and I'm like of all people for a cell phone to go off in front of it's Paddy Lepone. Yeah. She's notoriously famous for like, you know, which is

terrifying. But it was like kind of muffled enough and I was in like the balcony so I was far enough away. Did the people around you though? Oh, around you hurt and I was and I acted like it was not me. Yeah. My grandma did that. I was like I don't know I don't know where's coming from. My grandma did that and my brother like my one of my brothers said hers was just blaring through the house. Her's was just like full ringtone out and about and I see it lit up in her phone and she has a little panic shuffle and then I think it was like a defense mechanism to like claim it wasn't hers because she knew it first and then the denial was better yeah yeah yeah yeah she started to rummage and then she was just

like that's not me nope can't deal with it yeah my god i'm so paranoid about it now yeah i also notice like certain shows like when i saw lion king i'm like oh we're gonna see your phones yeah yeah and children and children commentating yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah i was okay but that's okay that is okay ultimately i'm like oh we have to know what we're seeing and that's yeah and that That's fine. And there's a few rustles and buzzes here and there. Like if you go see the radio city music hall, Christmas Spectacular. What are you doing?

That's there to take emails. You've got to expect like a whole Verizon commercial. Yeah. For sure. Yeah. I did a tour of that when I was like 10. Did you really? Yes, I did.

It made no sense. Wait, did you do them as Rob was still you, Keen and Bulger? No. No, I didn't. Okay. But also. Yeah. But maybe.

No, I don't know. I was like 10. Yeah. And there was, like, 40 people in that cab. And you're like, I don't remember any of you are. So my name is Octavia. Welcome to Nur. Thank you.

Thank you. There's something that I can help you with drinks. Oh, I'm good with water. I just had a coffee, so I need to, like, calm down. Do you have coffee? Yes, I have a cappuccino, latte, Chris. Ooh. Can I do a cappuccino?

Do you want ice or? Oh, hot would be great. That's amazing. I'm so excited. I've also had coffee, but I, I can't ever stop. I'm fascinated with the fact that you have done

land as well up with people and you don't remember doing it. But I guess it makes sense because you were 10 when you did that. I remember doing the show. You remember doing the show but you remembered your parts. Oh, of course.

I know the show like the back of my hand. Sure. I mean, almost like 95% of humankind did know that show. It's like, it's the classic show of all time. And also every high school does it. Do they now? It's always been a high school club.

The school edition, is hilarious to me because it's not like sometimes school editions are like really really censored and lame is really isn't like lovely ladies is still the same really why is there a song about horse yeah it's not like pretty people not at all they don't change a single thing wow no they must right i don't think what else like the ternardier like the master of the house song with in there with our drinking booze and like talking about getting DJs and stuff? Yeah.

No. It's great. And it's still three hours? It's still three hours. Yeah, of course it is. There's no way to make that show not three hours, I don't think. You can't do like a Phantom thing with Les because Phantom's 90 minutes now. Okay, just to give you a little history of me, I was obsessed with Phantom of the Opera when I was a kid.

Of course. Like that was my jam. Cool. So when I finally got to New York to see it, it was like a big moment for me. For sure. And I even like for my senior, you didn't go to like Popper High School, did you? I did. Public school, yeah.

Did you do in your senior year, I don't know, for the yearbook, we got to, we had to, like, take photos and, like, tuxedos for our senior year photos. And then we also could do, like, a more casual picture. So for my senior photo, they were, you could do a more casual shot, and you could also bring, like, props or, like, other things. And I, or sometimes people would just, like, do a photo with a group of friends. Yeah, yeah. And I was, like, I brought a Phantom of the Opera mask. Oh, that's awesome.

And I took a series of photos that are so earnest and so serious. And I really was taking myself very seriously. Oh, no, it was a big deal for me. It's the only way that these kids do it. And Gaten, I think my senior, did you have senior quotes? I have a bad one. Okay, I want to hear you guys. Mine was, I kid you not, turn your face away from the garish light of day, which is a

which is my favorite line. I love it. I love that line well. That's how much I love. First of all, what was your senior quote? I went with Opportunity is not a lengthy visitor from Into the Woods, which I was like, watch. That's not like indicative of like how I vibe.

I don't think it is at least. I guess I chose it. You look for the war, you celebrate opportunity and it felt appropriate for graduating. It wasn't even a thing that like wore like I thought it was good then and that I like cringe at later. Like I knew it was bad then and I went with it anyway. I didn't have to have a quote. Education, thank you so much.

Oh, yay. I'm so excited. So you like for starters, we have the crispy sushi. We have with tuna, tamachi, uni, or second page? Oh, second page, yes. This one. I see, thank you. And state tartar also.

The shrimp and putre is very good here. Okay, great. The Kampachi sashimi is very good. Salmon tiradito. Do like a light starter. The whole eggs with caviar and oysters, fry oysters are very good also. Oh, okay.

You like the Kampachi sashimi? I saw how they flip for them. I'll do the Kumpakis Sashimi, please. That sounds great. I appreciate that. That with a cappuccino is a bold mood. Yeah, the fish. I love it.

I love it. It's normal, yeah? It's so normal. It's brunch time. I just had a four-shot Ice Cortado, okay? And I'm about to wait for it. Could I have the yellow tail? Oh, no.

Sushi please? No, no, no, no, no. No, sorry. You can try some of the sushi. I'm going back. I'm going back. And when good is with the spicy tuna. And then, um, what are we gonna have for food food? Oh, that's a great question.

Yeah. Do you like to try the sushi? I mean, I kind of want regular sushi. I do sushi? Ooh, I'll do the Shazam roll. That sounds great. I just like the way it sounds. It's so, there's panache to it.

There is panache. If I got a combo, would you want sushi or sashimi or a combination of both? Combo. Okay, let's do the sushi and sashimi combo. We're just fishing it up today. Perfect. Perfect.

That sounds great. That works for me. And for hungry, we'll get more. Always. You can always get more. My eyes are notoriously bigger than my stomach. Same. And I always bring it home and I never eat it.

It's hard with sushi, though. It's hard. Sushi's like, it's out. Like a piece of lasagna that I bring home is going to get eaten. Right. I do that with like, yeah. By the way, I, yeah. By the way, I went to have, I had dinner with my mother-in-law who was in town.

And we went to one of my favorite restaurants, Don Angie, who I've done an episode of this podcast there. And they have these, this is lasagna, and it's like in little rolls. And there's six pieces. And I took a piece home. And I had a piece of it before a show. And I thought as I was eating it, I was like, hmm, tough call. Maybe not the best call, but I'm hungry and I'm going to go with it. I'm fine.

And so in the play, at one point, I take off. I changed clothes on stage and I'm in my underwear for like, like literally four and a half seconds. But it's long enough. When you're in front of 2,000 people, even a second is like too long. I check for when reading things like, I hope not.

And I feel pretty good about myself right now. I'm like, I'm okay with it. And like I'm secure and all that stuff. But it was the night I had lasagna. And I do remember telling myself, I was like, this is maybe not a good idea. And the minute I took off my robe

and I was in my underwear for like literally a few seconds, I heard one person go, ew. And it was like, all of my decisions came back to haunt me. It was just like one person. Do you think that the lasagna was like spilled over into like that territory of someone who's just ew? Or maybe they were just like, I don't want to see that guy from modern family with anything other than a full suit on. Like I don't know what it was. Not you.

Ew. Oh, that's tough. Now for a quick break, but don't go away. When we come back, Gaten and I learn one very specific thing we both have in common. It involves theater, and he tells me how he bombed his stranger things audition. Doesn't seem to matter, because obviously he got the part. Okay, be right back. This time of year always makes me think about the small gestures that mean the most.

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Okay, you started high school before you got Stranger Things, right? So you were already in the public school system in New Jersey. Yeah, I like jumping into eighth. grade is when I started. Okay. Yeah. What was the response like with your friends and classmates that like maybe weren't a part of the industry? It was fine. It was it's a small town and everybody there I had grown up with. So I've known them since I was, especially everybody in my like in around the same grades that I was like the kids that were like either two years old or two years younger to me like and in the middle like they were usually pretty

chill about it. They more just, like, make fun on me more than anything. Really? Like, yeah. In, like, a kind way? Oh, of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They were very playful about it because it was obviously very unorthodox, and they had been used to me, like,

I had to leave early when I was doing stuff in the city, when I was, like, in lay miss, which I did for a year, I commuted every day from South Jersey, which was like a two-hour drive. So to make the 7 o'clock shows, I'd have to leave school like half an hour early so i'd always get like called down to the office and like the class would like oh there he goes oh god he's off to plague a brush yeah yeah yeah no one cared like most of it didn't know what i was doing also i mean we just said you know let mizrob is a very long show

so as a kid you know you are leaving school early to go to the city to do a show at starts to seven and then you're like probably getting home at like one in the morning i was getting home at like 1.30. And having not a full night's sleep and then waking up. I think health-wise, like physically, that was probably not great. But anytime the conversation came up about like ending the run or taking a break. Because also what became an issue, it was easier in elementary school. But homework was like addition and subtraction and maybe like a coloring book.

And then I got into middle school and high school and the workload gets bigger. and you take a little bit more solo responsibility, you're going to different classes, and it just gets harder naturally, as it should. And that became hard to balance with the show, because the time that I would have needed to focus on my education was taken up by what I was naturally prioritizing,

which was doing the show, and doing it the best that I could, because I loved it greatly. And it was a true passion. And at the time, it was so frustrating every time my parents would sit me down, I'd be like, you need to work out. Because in seventh grade, when I was finishing lay-mise,

which was too old to be doing that show. I was approaching the end of, like, the second cycle of that, and it wasn't looking like I was going to stay. And before we got the call that they weren't going to renew, we had made the decision that we were going to not renew anyway. Right. Because it was just getting too much, and we were going to decide to take a break as a unit

and focus on my school, and then a month later, the audition for Strater Things came through. Oh, my gosh. Which is such a different thing. You know, I'm always always fascinating with the kids on Modern Family who, you know, we'd have them on set for a little while. And then in between setups, they would go away and they'd go away from school and then they'd come back in. But, you know, they've worked on their school within the confines of our work days. So, like, you know, they got to have, I think, you know, full night's sleep and like all this stuff.

It's just different with theater. I slept better when I was doing school. I was going to say. You know, it's such a different structure. Thank you. Hi, thank you so much. Come on there, please. I can put stuff out of the way for you.

Oh, that was so good. Thank you, thank you. Thank you so much. Oh, this is just delightful. How was your school situation like? Did you go to L.A. for the second half year studies? Because I know Amda had that, like, Bicomacol.

No, I went, the only reason I went to L.A. is because I was, when I was doing the musical, the 25th animal, Pudman, Kenny Spelling Bee. Which I did in senior year. Did you really? I was Coney Bear myself. Shut up. Yeah, I did.

Did you ever tell me that? No. Maybe I did. I don't know if I knew that. That was the new year. You're welcome. Oh, thank you so much for all the info. How was your transition into, you know,

but also, I mean, you were not in L.A. You were in Atlanta, which is... I was never in L.A. Kind of a bubble. I've never lived out in L.A. Really? I've never worked there. I've never even seen a palm tree.

Never seen in the Pacific. One thing that always struck me was that, for me, I mean, I'm a kid of the 80s. Like, I was born in 1975, and, like, all these things that Stranger Things was referencing was stuff that I deeply resonated with. Cool. And it was, like, wonder what that feeling is. And I was, you know, I mean, I got to meet some of you on, like, you know, at these different events and stuff.

And I was like, oh, my God, they were nowhere. near being born at that time. Not even close, yeah. But what was it like for you, like, embonding that era? It was kind of an easier transition than I think it could have been because of our parents.

Oh, yeah. They were, I think even before that show came along, were so, my dad specifically was locked into the idea of me watching all the stuff he grew up watching. Because he was kind of one of those dads. What did you watch, E.T. Yeah, E.T. The Goonies, Stand By Me.

Those are all ones. that I loved prior to the whole process of filming the show or even auditioning for the show. Where they did, it was really cool when the process, casting, when the casting process narrowed down to their last, probably like, 10 or 12 kids that they were gonna like,

like the process for the boys was different than casting for 11, because there was only one girl in the group at the time. And so they were like, that was Millie who ended up getting that. But the guys who were all like, interchanging which roles we were auditioning for, I read for Mike once, I read for Lucas once, and that was a weird, that was a, I don't know why I ever did.

I read for Cameron. Did you? Yeah, I did. Did you, were you ever in for like Phil or anything? No, no, no, no, no, no. Okay, cool. Just cam. Yeah.

What was that? Like, how weird? And like, I knew what I was wrong for it. Like, you just said, it was like, this is not the right thing. There's no way I'm going to get this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I butchered my first audition. Did you really?

It was the worst audition. Did you, were you reading for the role that you got or for someone else? well I don't think I was ever really in from Mike but they really only had Mike written I remember I blanked on so many of my lines I just had my script right in front of my face and I just kept looking down and I kept looking up and it was the weirdest pauses ever and I was mortified afterwards and I was like what I forget about that one and also it wasn't very big so it was like at the time I was like ah you know next one and for some reason I got a call back and I asked them why what did they say they were like I don't know

It just clicked. We just, like, we knew you wanted you back after that one. I'm like, why? Sometimes being cute just gets you really far. Truly. You're like, you were riding on your cuteness is what was happening. It was tough. I'm still terrified.

There was a spark. They saw something. Maybe. I don't know. I mean, that's also nice to hear it because, like, you know, with rejection a lot, you know, I always think about what did I do wrong and, like, what did I do right? And, like, why did I get this or why didn't I get this? It's such a, I think, formative time of figuring out all your own insecurities.

It's the first time you're actually like aware of yourself and aware of your perception. When you're seven, you don't care. Yeah, that's true. That's not something that settles in. And so it was actually easier to like let it roll off my back when I was young. And I didn't start getting more self-conscious about why I wasn't booking or hearing less than forgiving notes about things you can't. Like, whether it's like a look. I remember when I had all my dental reconstruction issues, which I'm still.

going through, but at the time it was kind of the only reason why I wasn't booking a lot of things. We're like, ah, it's not really what we're looking for. And that was fine for a long time growing up. And then as I got older and it became more noticeable because a lot of seven-year-olds don't really have a lot of teeth yet. And as I approached my teenage years, that became more apparent. And I started to get more self-conscious even after I finished Stranger Things. And that was weird to grapple with. Now for a quick break, but don't go away. After the break, Gaten tells me about his feelings on stranger things coming to an end.

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How did you forget about the platter of sushi? I forgot with your cappuccino. Oh, that's why I'm mixed brazzled. This is great. It's selling a tea. Oh, this looks so good. Sevas, tuna, yellow tail, salmon, and fluke. It's same here.

I'm here. And this is a chast and roll. Thank you. Thank you. I appreciate it very much. We got a little soy sauce? Get in there, yes, some soy sauce. I, uh, thank you. Of course.

I'm shaking from my caffeine. I literally am. I can't keep still. I don't know why. You were right. Like, the one cup I had at home was enough. Listen, I mean, people always ask me. It's so funny when I was thinking about all these questions to ask you. Because obviously, you know, I want to talk about your whole career, but, like, very into things that's such a formative thing

that happened to you. It's the largest chunk of it. And, you know, I think about all these questions that I want to ask. I'm like, God, this is the exact same stuff that people want to know about modern family. Yeah, I'm sure. I couldn't imagine.

Just there's something, because how long, was that? How long, you were 10 years you said that you were? Nine, nine years, like, working on it. Yeah. I booked when I was 12. And so I guess 10 years since it was released, or nine years since it was released

and about 10 years since we started working on it. Yeah. What was it like meeting? I mean, were you all put together in an audition? Never all together. Never all together. On set. The first time all of us were all together was on set for the first day.

I knew Caleb, who plays Lucas, before, because he was in the theater as well. He was in the Lion King while I was doing Les. And so we were like treading the boards at that point. And Finn was a little Vancouver. I met Finn before. I can't like we did chem reads together just me and him

they hadn't found their Lucas yet so it was like chemistry reads for those you know Of course In the biz Kemp's yeah There was really everybody Sorry sorry sorry sorry Wait is Finn

Who you were roommates with Okay Yeah I live with him for a year this past This past season Which was the only season that I was out there By myself And it was really really fun It was great

It was kind of like a little bit of like a college experience Yeah Really similar to it We were the same age, and it was the first time, like, I would look around, I would look around, like, three months after we lived together, and, like, this place is disgusting. What are we doing? Who is messier?

We kind of matched each other's energy a little bit. And also, we got along so well, and had been so close for so long, that we didn't really, like, hold each other to, like, a standard. And so we were kind of just like, ah, fuck it, whatever, man, we'll get through it later. And then the wake-up call came when, like, we would, when, like, we would, when. to go out and so we were like all right we'll just meet you at yours and both of us would be like no do not come 10 feet to our home and we're like oh if there's a real panic paint a picture of like your living room for me I don't know in a picture of a shared space

I want to actually I need some more details our room that's my thing is that initially we're like you know what our rooms can be messy as long as our shared space and the living room is fine and that maintained itself for a while okay and then like little things like clothes would clutter laundry hadn't been done and dishes would pile up. Was there art on the wall? And it wasn't ours. We had rented this place. Okay.

And so there was a little, there was some art on the walls, but there was like design before we like, it was like a, so there's a personal touch is. Like an air being, like a long-term Airbnb got it. Got it. Got it. This company called Minty Living, which is Atlanta based, I think. Yeah. It was nice.

It was very nice. But it got grosser and grosser. It sure did. And the dishes was tough. The dishes. This was tough. You didn't have a dishwasher? We did.

You just didn't use it. I mean, listen, I hate loading a dishwasher and I hate unloading a dishwasher. I like it when it's running. And I know it just doesn't be clean of that. That's the best part. But what do we do with it? What do we do before we get there? Yeah.

No, I get it. It's really funny. I was like, we got to figure this out. Well, it's for the best. It was for the best. And we learned. And like, towards the end of it, we got better. Yeah.

But you enjoyed the actual living together part. It was so much fun. Yeah. And that was kind of scary because you never know, like, when you move in to, he's one of my closest friends, and when you're moving in with one of your best friends, you never know if you're going to live together well. Because sometimes that kind of like...

Yeah, that could ruin things. That could ruin, that could ruin friendships. It ruins, like, a dynamic. And, you know, if you're mature enough, you can be like, oh, this isn't working for us. So, like, for the sake of our friendship, we should end this. And it was great. You are so great in Sweeney's hot.

I am a massive Sondheim, fanatic. I know I said Phantom of the Opera is my favorite, but I mean, really like Is that still your favorite? Would you still say? No. No. I mean, I like it. It's like nostalgia for me. Like when I went to go see this immersive production, I was like, I'm into this.

I mean, it's the great gift of being able to do, you know, what we do is to like be able to move people and use our whatever platform or spotlight we have. I mean, I know you've done a lot of really great work around CCDE.

Would you explain that to me? It's a, so I have a condition called cladocranial dysplasia that is a genetic bone disorder that affects skeletal growth. Like visibly, it usually affects skull growth, dental, it affects you dentally. And things don't grow. I'm missing bones and things. And I have a bunch of supernumerary teeth that I had before my surgeries. And it's a pretty weird thing.

It's very rare, and I've had a spontaneous case, so it was kind of something that nobody really knew how to approach when I was younger, and we weren't really even able to know anybody with the condition until after Stranger Things came out, because they had me talk about it for a split second on the show, which we thought was kind of just like an in-passing thing, like, yeah, we'll do that, and then it kind of sparked a pretty exciting process of community building of people with it, who I had never met. and for so long most people who have had who have it have not met anybody else who have it

I mean before the show that was right right right that was the case and now since the show has come out we've kind of people worry about I even like things on like Reddit and Facebook you were like I saw this show and there's this kid who has this and I do too does anybody else have this and it was the first like kind of beacon that people could use as like a reference point because if you just went about that on Reddit without like attaching it to something

bigger people, it probably just like went into like the, you know, ethos of the, of the, yeah, algorithm of the internet, of the internet, no one had really seen it. And so kind of since then, it was kind of felt like a responsibility to use that, use that opportunity to kind of build something that hadn't been built before. And so I helped to co-found an organization called CCD Smiles. And it's been a really incredible process. It's weird. It's so weird. But the one thing that's been consistent and almost easy to do is to build the community around it. Because there was such a...

I'm sure there's a hunger for it. There was such a hunger for it. And it was something that nobody had ever expected to experience. And something I'll never really get to experience is that real booming joy of finally developing a community with it. Because there's so many people who are in, maybe the 50s or 60s who have... never met anybody with it and all on a whim now there's a community built there and that's got to be the most incredible thing it's got it's pretty it's pretty nuts I have a really mild case comparatively to a lot of people with it and unless I really would

tell people that I had a condition it wouldn't necessarily usually be noticed but when you meet people who have the condition as well it becomes it's very clear and it's very easy to see the similarities between us and that was really cool to experience but even when I was younger my parents were very good at building a really positive outlook on it and I always thought a lot of it is a defining trait that I was always really excited to talk about and I never had an environment in my home in which I would ever want to not talk about it I had cool party tricks so I could like push my shoulders

together and it was a fun fact about me like anytime we'd there be circles in elementary school to be like tell us something about yourself and that was the first thing that I would do and before I started acting that was like my thing and I was always so excited to talk to people anyway from a young age I was kind of just a textbook introvert I mean extrovert and I think I've remained that way and I think because of that condition because it was always instilled in me to be excited and be honored about it and teach people about it and if people are mean, you have an opportunity to help them grow by teaching them about it and making them and educate them. And that was always really, really fun. And I'm lucky to have that experience. I understand why

others don't. I understand why others had a way different process. I think the outlook on something like that back in the 80s or 70s or 80s was way different. I think there wasn't much of an incentive to really try to thrive in it, as there would have been now. And so my outlook has never changed, but I have heard different experiences from others. So I'm really honored to, like, share that part of myself and always have been. So nothing's really changed for me. It's pretty incredible. Thank you.

Thanks for letting me talk about it. I really appreciate it. I think it's great. I mean, it's a role model for, and not just for that specific condition, but I just think for, like, embracing differences in one another. And, like, you know, I think when you see people like that who embrace this thing that's unique about them, it inspires other people to embrace things that are, that make them different from other people. Yeah. Those are the things, like, I always say, like, when we're kids, we really want to blend in with everyone and we want, we want to fly under the radar. And then as adults, like, we're always looking for things to set us apart from the people.

The difference between kids and adults with it is remarkable because adults are so bad at letting go of their own insecurity when meeting people. Adults are so hyper-fixated on saying the right thing, not overstepping, kind of just like testing the waters, whereas kids will always be like, do you want to be my friend? Yeah. They go, do you want to be my friend? And that is so fun. It's pretty exciting. It's great. We're pretty stoked for it.

Yeah, she's really, really proud. Ooh. It's great. I am. Thank you. Another thing that people always ask me about with, you know, modern family ending, and I'm interested in hearing your story about it, is what that last day of shooting was like for you? It was, it didn't feel like a day on set. Okay, yeah.

It felt more like a precedent than anything else. Same. Yeah. Yeah. There's cameras. For us, did it feel like this for you at all? Did you feel like a funeral in a weird way? Like, where people showed up that you hadn't seen him like...

Like forever? Oh, dude, absolutely, dude. I was like, where have you been? I've never thought of it as like a funeral. I haven't seen you in six years. Where did you come from? Did like past cast members come through? Or was it just executives?

No, like executives haven't seen. No, like people from the office buildings that came like, hey the respects. Yeah. It was so weird. But also, I noticed it was like anybody who had ever. never worked on that show in any capacity, if they could, was like huddled in to the sound stage, which is probably a fire hazard. But there was a lot of people in that room.

Yeah. But what was really good, all of our parents were invited back. And that was like the most grounding, wonderful thing. Because as we grew up doing... You're talking about your parents of the show, not the parents. No, no, no, my actual parents. Or your actual parents. Our actual parents. But because they hadn't had to be on the set because they were... We were all adults at this point. Got it, got it. That's sweet. We had a lot of family on set, too. Yeah. I'm so glad that they let it happen. Because there was a world where, like, we weren't sure

if they were going to let family come and see everything. But they did let our parents come because they were there from the beginning. They were all there. And they used to, like, they all got close with each other. And anytime we'd stay cut and go over, there was always, like, a section for the parents. Yeah.

And we'd spend time. And then seeing the section for the parents again. And, like, all of them, I love them greatly. But, like, it's been, like, a decade. So, like, seeing them look a little grayer. And, like, a little bit. Like, it was, like, the craziest, kind of, like, grounding experience ever like being able to go back over and like they were watching on the monitors

and being able to give my mom a hug like I usually would after takes I didn't like and ask if she liked them and she would be so encouraging and just the same thing so that felt normal around like a huge like there were also like these tarps up on the ceiling that were full of what were clearly balloons for the when they announced the rap that's cool but it was almost like when you like see a surprise party before you're supposed to see it. You see like Taylor Swift waiting in like to bubble up a bum. I see she's where she's coming up.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. She's doing trills. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's funny. It was a weird day. Yeah. And it was a fun day. It felt like a graduation.

And for you, yeah, for sure, absolutely. I mean, you're getting to experience something that we didn't get to do because of COVID where you wrapped and then you get to have sort of like a little extra. extra addendum with their with their cast and like did you not did you have like a pandemic wrap we had a pandemic wrap we we wrapped the show we were able to to shoot it but then we but then the we shut down for COVID three weeks later so like all the press around the last early 2020 yeah yeah way we barely made it we barely made it that's and uh and then we didn't get to like be with each other for any of that press leading up to the finale virtual yeah we're something You were on Zoom.

I was like literally on Kimmel with boxes. And we were all, it was like, and we were using it as like an opportunity to like reconnect. I remember like, for sure. We were like in the waiting room to go into Kimmel because they put you in like a Zoom waiting room.

And like they could not get us to stop talking because we were also excited to see each other. It was like all the six adults. That's worth that. That's better. Yeah. That's better anyway. Yeah.

I think so at least. I wish we could have been together. I do. How was the, the few years after. How did that go over? I mean, I want to ask you about what you're anticipating. But like for us, again, it was COVID.

So it was like a weird time to be away from that. But like the excitement of, and I'm sure you understand this about doing something for so long in the same role. And obviously growing with that part is exciting. But like the idea of getting to do something different. And yes, you've been able to do Sweeney Todd and, you know, theater things. things that excites you, but, you know, to know that, like, really that chapter's done, anyway, who knows, you're going to get, what's going to happen next is you're going to be 10 years of people ask you, if there's a reunion.

There's a reunion coming, yeah, it's already happening. We've already get those questions. Yeah, guys, we haven't even, it's not even out. I know, I know, get ready, get ready. And it's going to happen more for sure. But it is, it was an exciting time, but also it's a time of readjustment. It's destabilizing. I oh that's definitely it's a weird conversation to have because during the whole process of working on strange things like throughout most of it it was a it was very rare that there were things that we could work on between seasons because early on they wanted to crank them out and then that stopped very quickly because there was just so much we for the last two seasons we had huge hiatuses and pandemic was one of them and then the

strikes were another. So right after four, the strike started as we were about to start shooting five. So the writer's strike started, what was that March? February March. And we were planning on going back in April. And that was the start of like being excited about what might come after and let me ask you what would you, what would you, what would be your ideal? I don't know. Next step. Just consistencies is kind of just like I really could not care about the eyes that are on a specific project. I would just love to do the things that I love to do. And I would love to step on stage consistently as much as I can. I live here in the city. I'm actually between spots. I'm in Jersey with my family for the summer. Excuse me from your roommate. Yeah, he'll just come here. He's like

refuses to be out here in New York. Wait, I saw photos of you looking for an apartment together and you guys were holding hands like Jason Bateman and Will Arnett. Yes, of course. That was your info. I remember we always said like if, I was looking for spots there. I was with my girlfriend because it's up because my girlfriend is cropped out of those pictures, which is the funniest part. That's hilarious. She's standing there next to me, and we always said that if we ever see one, we're going to recreate that. And we see him down the street, and he goes, oh my God, oh my God, it's happening.

Hold my hand. Hold my hand. It's so good. I was so excited. Were you actually waiting to recreate? Yeah. Because sometimes when they're in the city, when I'm in the city by myself, when we're all by ourselves, nothing, we never get.

The minute you're in groups, people. But the minute we pair up, it's like a beacon. goes out. Yeah, I know. I know. I don't know how or why. It's so funny. It happened. Same area. Like I was, I grabbed lunch with Sadie one day and the same thing happened. I'm like, how do they know? How do they know that we're going to be together

at this specific time? By the way, I mean, you're young and you've been in like a very long-term relationship. Yeah. Unusual. It is unusual. For someone your age. Great. You love it. It's so great. Your relationship guy. I think so. Yeah. It's, uh, we've been

together since we were 15. Which is nuts You've been dating since you're 15 Yeah What's that like to like You know It's unreal There's such big moments together

I think like that's what Has kept us together for so long Is that we have so many shared experiences It's such a formative time And it's also such a normal time For people to grow apart and change And that's usually why those relationships don't last Which is completely fine

It just did for us We just thrived in the distance which is hard to do we did really well and we started like you know when you're 50 it's like we went like bowling and like held hands

and like my stepmom drove us to our first date like cute shit like that but getting to like experience those like fun high school you know like Did you go to prom together? Yeah

we went to prom together it was but also she was a grade below me so she was a junior when I was a senior But she started the process of being an actor around like 15, around that same time. So she was just starting. She was just starting at that point.

Wow. And that's where we kind of got along and kind of had like some, like, you know, shared experiences there. And getting to see her start that process and thrive herself has been unreal. Because it's so hard to do. And she's anything she puts her mind, she like, locks in. The way she went about it was. Does she ever seek advice from you? No.

Not even a little. She's like, do not talk to me about it. Good. The most I do, when we do tape, like, if I'm the only one available to be her reader for tape, she's like, do not look at it. Like, turn around and read at the wall. Don't make choices. Like, anytime we read together, she's like, why are you making choices?

It's just like yours. It sounds like me and my husband. I forgot, I forgot, I forgot. My husband is so judgy. And he helps her up an audition. He's like, is that how you're going to do it? Yeah, yeah. Get out of here.

You need to go. And we've gotten good at like that of like, my job is to, Like, we'd like a robot at the wall while she makes her choice. That's hilarious. Yeah, it's been one of the better consistencies of our lives. I love that you've had that. Yeah, me too. Yeah, she rocks.

Thank you for doing this. Thank you, I really appreciate it. I appreciate it. Sorry, if I extend it over the time limit there. Yeah, you did it. This episode of Dinner's On Me was recorded at Lour Fish Bar in Soho, New York. York City. Next week on Dinner's On Me, you know her from HBO's Big Love as Snow White and Once Upon a Time and reprising her role as Judy Hopps in Zootopia, too. It's Jennifer Goodwin.

We'll get into her diverse roles from prestige TV to Disney animated Oscar-winning films, marrying her Prince Charming and how she balances her career and her family. And if you don't want to wait until next week to listen, you can download that episode right now by subscribing to Dinner's On Me Plus. As a subscriber, not only do you get access to new episodes one week early, you'll also be able to listen completely ad free. Just click try free at the top of the Dinners On Me show page

on Apple Podcasts to start your free trial today. Dinner's On Me is a production of Sony music entertainment and a kid named Beckett Productions. It's hosted by me, Jesse Tyler Ferguson. It's executive produced by me and Jonathan Hirsch, Our showrunner is Joanna Clay. Our associate producer is Alyssa Midcalf. Sam Baer engineered this episode.

Hans Dale She composed our theme music. Our head of production is Sammy Allison. Special thanks to Tamika Balance Kalasni and Justin Makita. I'm Jesse Tyler Ferguson. Join me next week. This week on dinners on me, I sat down with Real Housewives of Salt Lake City icon Meredith Marks at Boteca-Louie in West Hollywood. which, by the way, is not where I expected to find her less than 12 hours after DJing at a club literally down the street until like 1 a.m.

I rolled in with my coffee. She rolled in with sunglasses, serenity, and zero hangover. We ordered salads because we're responsible adults, but the conversation that was completely unhinged in the best way. We talked about loyalty, public feuds, and what happens when your real life becomes reality TV content? And then she dropped this. Everybody's marriage or children is going to be huge, like, always. Understandably. You know, but now I'm deciding consciously just so everyone knows,

and if any of my castmates are listening, you guys should know this too, and my producers. I have decided not to let that ever trigger me again because they weaponized it one time too many. Elegant, chilling, slightly therapeutic. So if you're into emotional growth served with the side of housewives-level honesty, the Meredith Marks episode is out now.