Dinner’s on Me with Jesse Tyler Ferguson - Wendie Malick — on success after 70 and getting comfy with on-screen beau Harrison Ford
Episode Date: May 20, 2025'Shrinking’ and ‘Night Court’ star Wendie Malick joins the show. Over tuna melts, Wendie talks about her iconic characters on ‘Just Shoot Me’ and ‘Hot in Cleveland,’ including some behin...d-the-scenes moments with Betty White, and why working with Harrison Ford on ‘Shrinking’ is like an old pair of jeans. This episode was recorded at Huckleberry in Santa Monica, CA. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Hi, it's Jesse.
Today on the show, you know her from Just Shoot Me, Hot Cleveland,
and most recently, from the Apple TV Plus series Shrinking, it's Wendy Malek.
We're down to two horses and a miniature donkey and two dogs.
A miniature donkey?
Come on.
People come over just to make out with him.
He seems so fucking beautiful.
This is Dinners on Me,
and I'm your host, Jessi Tyler Ferguson.
Throughout her career, Wendy Malick has made a habit of playing women who have it all,
or at least fake it fabulously.
With sharp wit, impeccable timing, and a killer wardrobe, her characters juggle ambition and
romance like seasoned pros.
Proving that success doesn't mean shutting the door on love, just, you know, maybe slamming it a few times first.
Whether she's strutting through a newsroom as a delightfully self-absorbed Nina Van Horn in Just Shoot Me,
clinging to fame and martinis as soap diva Victoria Chase in Hot in Cleveland, or trading dry banter and real emotion as Dr.
Julie Barham in Shrinking, Malik brings humor, heart, and humanity to every role.
Her characters resonate because they refuse to choose between career and connection.
They flirt, fall, flounder, and do it all in heels.
Through breakups, breakthroughs, and Botox jokes, Malek shows us that women can be complex,
confident, and still open to love.
Preferably with a side of wine and sarcasm.
Now as someone who grew up watching Just Shoot Me, Wendy Malick's character, Nina Van Horn,
was everything I thought a sitcom character should be.
Glamorous, hilarious, and whip smart.
Getting to guest star opposite Wendy on Hot in Cleveland Years Later was surreal for me.
We'd met before at a few parties,
but spending that week with her and her element
only deepened my admiration for her.
She was just as warm, funny, and magnetic in real life
as she is on the screen.
So I was thrilled when she took me up on a meal, on me,
after one of her days of shooting.
Hey!
Oh my god, it looks so good.
Hi.
How are you?
Good, how are you?
Good, how are you?
Good to see you.
I brought Wendy to Huckleberry in Santa Monica.
Now for any Angelino, Huckleberry has been a morning destination for well over a decade.
What started as a Santa Monica farmers market inspired pop-up at sister restaurant, Rusta Canyon, quickly morphed
into a brick and mortar that would get folks lined up early for their pastry case full
of biscuits, tarts, donuts, and so much more.
It's cozy, delicious, no frills vibe, felt like the perfect spot for my friend Wendy,
who looks like a model but lives a very low maintenance lifestyle out on a ranch in Topanga.
Cozying up over some coffee and sandwiches
just felt like the perfect treat.
We also got a delightful surprise
of some of Huckleberry's heavenly cakes and tarts,
and now I'm already planning my next visit.
Okay, let's get to the conversation.
I was doing some research, I was like,
oh, Wendy's been nominated for a lot of Emmys.
And narrative won.
And she's been around forever.
No, and never won.
That's actually shocking to me,
especially for Just Shoot Me.
Yeah, that was the one.
That should have been, I think.
Yeah, 100%.
And La Ha in Cleveland.
Yeah, that was fun too,
but that was almost like a derivative version
of Just Shoot Me.
I mean, Nina was the, I think that was,
that was probably the one that put me on the map the most.
Oh, that's how I first got to know you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, because you're too young for dream on.
No, no, I'm probably 50 this year.
You were a child.
I was, I was an adult.
What was that 1990?
Yeah, so I was- So, 90 to 95.
I was in high school. Yeah.
But I did watch it.
No, actually that was your age group was the one
who all thought, oh, this is exciting
because it's so raunchy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.
Have you been here before?
Yeah.
You live in a neighborhood, right?
I live in Topanga.
Were you okay with the fires?
They were all around us.
It's so surreal.
How long have you lived over there?
Three years.
So basically the entire time you've been married.
And you kind of live off the grid, right?
Like you have land.
Well, we did.
And we do have land.
We have a ranch.
And the first, when we lived in our little cabin
while my husband was building the house,
we were totally off the grid.
People would come over and go,
wow, it's a lot of nature.
Where's your real house?
I go, this is it.
And if the sun doesn't shine, I don't blow dry my hair.
I mean, that's the way it is.
But it's beautiful.
I mean, and we've got animals.
What kind of animals do you have?
We're down to two horses and a miniature donkey
and two dogs.
A miniature donkey?
Come on.
People come over just to make out with him.
He's so freaking beautiful.
What would you do in the fires
if the fires had been more threatening?
Well, because you can get stuck in there.
Yeah.
That's the scary part.
So the Tuesday night when things were really insane
and we evacuated the horses, we took them to Pierce.
So the two horses and the donkey.
And it never really came into Topanga.
Just tiny little bits of it.
And we were a little worried, but they got him out.
And it was surreal.
I mean, it was like the world was on fire all around us.
Yeah.
It was so scary.
We have chickens now.
And I was like, I didn't know.
Are you in the country or are you, no.
No, I'm in Encino.
But you have a good yard where you can do that.
We have enough space. I have a chicken coop.
But you don't have a rooster.
No.
It's too loud.
No, no, no roosters.
I also don't want them to procreate, you know.
I'm like you.
I want my chickens to be like you, no children.
Well, I actually, I have a daughter, an adopted daughter.
Oh, we ought to know this.
I do, I do, yep have a daughter, an adopted daughter. Oh, we ought to know this. I do, I do.
Yep, no, she's technically my niece,
but she, we adopted her
because she's lived with us since she was five.
I didn't know that.
Yeah, yeah.
So she's 23, lives in New York City,
singer, songwriter, actress, biochemist.
So we can say she's technically your niece.
Yeah.
She's your brother's daughter.
Okay, got it, got it, got it.
That is the daughter that's in Chiris 5.
Oh my gosh, I had no idea.
Yeah, yeah.
What I was reading is you were talking about
how you decided not to have children.
Well, I mean, you didn't have children
technically through your body,
but I always have found that interesting
when people make that decision,
but also have such clear motherly maternal instincts as well.
Do you think I do?
I feel like you have maternal instincts.
I always had maternal instincts about animals.
Yeah.
I mean, that was like a no-brainer.
So easy to love them.
They love you forever.
They forgive you everything.
And so I've always had dogs and since Topanga,
I've had horses and donkeys and-
Yeah, right, right, right.
Interesting to get to this point in your life.
I know, for sure.
It changes things. We'd sort of tried kids initially and to this point in your life. I know. Sure. It changes things.
You tried kids initially and it wasn't in the cards.
I thought, well, that's the universe telling me that I'm
going to have kids in my life in a different way.
Then this came along and it was probably
the best lesson I've ever had in terms of how you have to make room for
somebody else in your life.
We had some challenging times.
She was kind of a wild kid the way I was when I was that age,
but I got away with it because my parents had no idea.
You were an only child, right?
No, oldest of three.
Oh really?
Yeah.
Okay, yeah.
You said that as if there's a type who's an only child.
Do you think there is?
Well, I'm an oldest as well, but for some reason,
I just felt like you were an only child.
I don't know why.
I got all the attention.
There it is.
Hi.
Guys, how are you guys doing today?
Good.
I'm hungry.
Welcome to Huckleberry.
Do you guys have any questions?
No, I think I'm going to have your tuna melt on the multi-grain.
Is it multi-grain toast?
Yeah.
Yeah, I'd love that.
Thank you.
That sounds really delicious. It's really good here. They make excellent tuna. It's actually our sourgrain toast? Yeah, yeah, I'd love that. Thank you. That sounds really delicious.
It's really good here, they make excellent too.
It's actually our sourdough toast.
Okay, that's good, I trust you.
Okay. Completely.
You know what, I think I'm gonna do the same thing.
Yeah, that sounds really good.
Can I show you guys with something to drink as well?
I'll do a lemonade please.
Thank you.
Yeah, of course.
Appreciate it.
So do you miss, like, having the schedule of a series?
Yes.
Isn't it amazing how that just sort of book ends your life
in this way and it also, what I'm realizing more and more,
and especially in this last year,
which seems like it's been six months since Christmas.
Yeah, truly.
But to have a safe place to go play with your friends
and get out of reality for a while is such a gift.
Just such a gift.
I shot an episode of Mid-Century Modern with Max Muchnick and Nathan Lane and Matt Bomer.
Linda Laven, I got to do the last.
And she died.
It was the episode that we shot right before Christmas,
and she passed away over the holiday.
I know Bruce Grayson does my makeup on Nightcore,
and he just loved Linda so much.
And he was stunned, absolutely stunned,
because she was so on her game and the whole thing.
So on her game.
I had great conversations with her.
I saw her at Sarah Paulson's 50th birthday party,
and she was just, you know, like the life of the party.
She was doing so well, and this all happened so fast.
You just don't know, do you?
No, no. Just being on that set reminded me
how much specifically I love doing multi-camera.
Well, you need to come do Night Court if it comes back.
I would love to.
Oh, they'd love to have you.
Yeah.
I'll tell you.
I would love to. I mean, also Night Court,
I loved that growing up.
John Lerquette, I loved it.
He's quite amazing.
Yeah, I watched a few episodes, he's fantastic.
How did it feel to go into something that was a reboot
and has that history?
I was so stunned that they invited me
because I had done a guest thing.
I did a couple of guest things on that
where I played a criminally insane woman
that John had put into the slammer many years ago.
And then I came back for another one,
and suddenly they said,
well, we'd like to make you a regular.
And I said, how?
I'm criminally insane.
They said, no, no, no, but it's Project Second Chance.
It turns out you were a lawyer before you went to jail.
And they went, oh, this is like dynasty or Dallas or something.
So good.
I mean, they can make anything work on TV if they want to.
If you die, they can figure out a way to, you're a twin now.
It's hilarious.
But I'm just so happy.
I'm always grateful for the work.
I love to work.
Also, between Night Court and shrinking,
I feel like you're being given an opportunity
to do things that you haven't really gotten to do before because we worked together on
Hot in Cleveland which was an absolute dream and I want to talk to more about
that because the episode I got to do had that big Mary Tyler Moore reunion
which was just an insane thing to be a part of. Yeah. But you know I feel like
with that that character Victoria and then Nina, you were saying it's sort of a
also a version
of Victoria, they're kind of like Russian nesting dolls
if you were like to put them in the same pool.
But like you sort of-
Going back to the same well.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Before, just give her a little twist.
Now she's an ambitious sub-op actor.
Well first of all, you're really good at playing
these types of women, you know,
these very sexually vivacious, you know-
Neurotic. Neurotic, but also they at playing these types of women, these very sexually vivacious, you know. Neurotic.
Neurotic, but also they come from
these sort of glamorous lives.
Nina was a former model, and Victoria was a soap opera star,
but they were also very self-possessed.
What I was always struck by is how self-assured they were
and how they really took care of themselves.
And sometimes their love life even took a backseat
to what they wanted.
They were very empowered women.
Well, I think that it was weird because with Nightcourt,
I thought, well, the thing that would make this character
interesting for me is if she's on, when she's on her meds,
she does a really good job,
but she doesn't stay on her meds all the time.
So there's a little danger in her
that could go off the rails at any time,
which they've been pretty good about.
And with Shrinking, that's probably the closest to me a little danger in her that could go off the rails at any time, which they've been pretty good about.
And with Shrinking, that's probably the closest to me
of any character I've ever played.
And it's just showing up and just reading the script
and it's all there on the page.
It's like the relationships they've built
among these characters.
I think it's the genius of Bill Lawrence and-
Bill Lawrence is so great.
Yeah, and Brad Goldstein. I mean, those guys are so good at finding the heart, the funny,
but also making you care enough. And those are always, I think, the ones growing up for
me. I remember watching Taxi and thinking, how amazing in 23 minutes or whatever they
give us for a half hour comedy. With commercials.
It could bring you to tears and make you laugh out loud.
And that was really extraordinary.
I think that was the first show where I watched and I thought, wow, you can run the whole
gamut in a little comedy, a sitcom with an audience.
That's a really tricky thing to do.
It is.
It's something I think you have to earn the trust of the audience.
You can't start always,
although Modern Family, I guess,
tried that a little bit at the beginning, but you know.
But over time, and it was what you were saying before
about shrinking, I think that people,
it took the first season of that show
for people to sort of get past the bigness
of these characters and to find out the little quirks
and the vulnerabilities in them,
and then it's so much more satisfying to follow them down whatever road they're going to take
you.
And you're invested.
And, you know, in your show, in Modern Family, you started to really care about these people.
The more time you spent with them, the more you realized that they were fragile and they're
outrageous sometimes, but also just with huge heart.
And it goes back to the heart.
And I think that's what really develops deep,
like relationships between audiences and cast, you know?
Now for a quick break, but don't go away.
When we come back, Wendy explains
why working with Harrison Ford felt like slipping
into an old pair of jeans.
And we share some outrageous behind the scenes tales
of Cloris Leachman being hilarious and chaotic
on the set of Hot in Cleveland.
Okay, be right back.
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Some of my favorite episodes of Dinners on Me
are episodes that happen over a good glass of wine.
Patricia Clarkson, Keri Russell, Margot Martindale,
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They definitely opened up.
I mean, maybe it was the food or maybe it was the wine,
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And we're back with more Dinners on Me.
I mean, speaking of Shrington specifically, you have this wonderful relationship with Harrison Ford.
You're his therapist, right?
I'm his neurologist.
Neurologist. That's right. That's right.
He has Parkinson's.
He's kept some secrets about his health from his loved ones.
And Harrison Ford's a therapist. And you have this beautiful budding romance.
And it's these two people in their seventies, like dating.
I just-
Oh, he's in his eighties.
In real life, right?
I see him playing his eighties.
I think he's supposed to be 70, yeah, late seventies.
Yeah, I know.
He's like, he's in his early eighties.
Yeah.
But I think it's just so refreshing also to see
a relationship. Old people getting it on.
Old people getting it on, yeah.
But also just like what that means and that late in life love.
I mean, how has that been for you to explore that with Harrison?
So beautiful.
Yeah.
Wonderful. I had done another series for Bill Lawrence.
He said, I've got a nice role for you to
play Harrison Ford's neurologist and and you have this great chemistry,
and I'd never met him before this show.
I thought, that's a lot of pressure.
But he was from the beginning so lovely and put me so at ease,
and we just got each other,
and I felt like, I said,
you're like an old pair of jeans.
That's how comfortable I feel with you.
We have a really good time,
and I just feel very safe in that relationship
and that we can take it wherever we need to.
Yeah, yeah.
It's really nice.
He's not, you're known for incredible work in comedy,
but you know, when you think of comedy,
you don't think about Harrison Ford.
He's really funny.
But he is hilarious.
Oh no, he is so dry and loves to sort of play the curmudgeon,
but he's a sweetheart.
It's been just a gift.
Everybody in that cast is like bringing it
and it's been really, really lovely.
I couldn't have asked for a sweeter job right now.
When we first started Hunt in Cleveland,
I was turning 60, Jane and Valerie were turning 50,
and Betty was turning 90.
And I remember thinking,
I don't think I could have made up a better situation
for me to be in at this age.
Cause that was really scary thinking,
oh my God, they say you go out to the desert
when you're 40 as a woman in this business.
And there I am about to turn 60 and I thought,
oh my God, this woman is having a Renaissance
and she's going to be 90.
And it just made me think of it in such a different way.
It was like, you have a whole other act.
Yeah.
That's right.
This act has been really sweet and I think one of
the best things about it is you get to
a certain age and you don't sweat the small stuff so much.
It's like what's really important to you?
What do you love? What brings you joy?
What's the best part of you you can
fan out into the world every day?
You just don't waste time on bullshit
that is really meaningless or is not bringing you some joy.
Right, right.
Well, what do you consider a full life now?
I mean, is it beyond career?
Is it?
Yeah, I think the balance of career.
So I used to say yes to everything.
It didn't matter if it took me over to bumfuck,
you know, I didn't care.
I just love to travel and experience.
I just played Santa Claus in Toronto. I say yes. I've still
seen it saying yes.
I got it, honey. You're much younger than me. I get it. I
get it. This is fairly recent. No, but all of a sudden I'm
thinking, damn, it's much, much harder for me to go away now. I
say, you know, I have an older husband, I've got old animals.
I've got a beautiful ranch and friends,
and I'm just so grateful that I get to do most
of my work here.
You're very lucky, especially right now.
Very lucky.
You're very, very lucky for sure.
You've been working pretty solidly
for a long time, haven't you?
I think so.
I mean, before you did Modern Family,
was it much more irregular?
Well, I did mostly theater,
which is, you know, just in and of itself irregular Modern Family, was it much more irregular? Well, I did mostly theater,
which is just in and of itself irregular because.
That's true, could be opening night, might be the end.
Exactly.
Thank you.
Oh my God, this looks incredible.
Thank you, thank you.
So good.
Okay, so I did two shows right before Modern Family.
One of them was The Class with David Crane.
David Crane, who you did Dream On with.
But I had ups and downs.
I still feel like I have ups and downs.
I mean, it's interesting,
because you say I've been working consistently,
and I guess when it's you and it's your career.
You don't know the dark nights of the soul.
You only feel the moments where you're not doing anything.
And it's also weird, because people will see stuff
that you did maybe a year or two years ago
and think that everything is current.
Someone just said, you know, I love your show.
And I'm like, I'm not on a show.
And I was like, well, of course they mean Modern Family
because maybe they're watching for the first time or.
And reruns.
Yeah, reruns, yeah.
But, you know, for me coming out of Modern Family,
and I talk about this a lot with the rest of my cast,
but it's that challenge that you're faced with
after leaving a show that you're known for,
of reinventing yourself or making sure
that the industry is still looking at you with fresh eyes.
But I feel like there's that ability
to sort of lean into a thing that you do,
but even that is scary sometimes,
because you think, well, I'm just gonna be pigeonholed
as this one thing.
And it seems that you have not pigeonholed yourself.
Or you've been really successful.
And probably that is where theater really helped you,
where you were able to like really branch out
and do other things and people know you theatrically
and so many of the whole much bigger range.
And that for me, sometimes doing plays and also doing little indie films.
That's been such a great,
I mean I played Amelia Earhart.
It was a wonderful little movie and done on a wing and a prayer.
But things like that just bring me so much joy to get to play
this old kind of bird who's sort of tough and lost.
Yeah, no, absolutely.
I want to talk about Hot Glee Lin for a little while
because truly that episode I got to do,
Sean Hayes, who produced it, called me and said,
we have a part for you if you want to do it.
It's so hilarious.
It is, it is...
So ridiculous.
It was a ridiculous role.
I had web tans.
I don't remember too much more about my character
other than the web tans.
No, you had web tans and the year before,
it was our, every year we did a year we'd set each other up on dates.
And my dates invariably had some physical creepiness.
You had the Web Tans, another year somebody had a nose
coming out of his head, and then the other one
was conjoined twins.
That's amazing.
So, you know, it was sold to me as like,
he has Web Tans, this is funny. But also, in you know, it was sold to me as like, he has wet hands, this is funny.
But also, in this episode,
it's basically a Mary Tyler Moore reunion.
With Mary Tyler Moore being a guest actress on this episode,
Boris Leachman, Georgia Ingle, obviously Betty White.
Is that it?
No, and who died?
Oh, Valerie Harper.
Valerie Harper as well.
That was like one of those pinch me moments?
Yeah, I want to hear your perspective on that because
Betty White is a regular on the show.
So this was her day job.
Then all these people who come in from her past,
and I'm sure she has different relationships with
all these women as we all do with people who we work with.
I think at least for me,
it was such an iconic moment seeing all these women together. all do with people who we work with. And I think, at least for me,
it was such an iconic moment seeing all these women together,
but then also to observe the nuances between them
and seeing like, oh,
Flores Leishman kind of gets under Betty White's skin
and like, you know, all these like-
She was so naughty.
So naughty.
She came in one day brushing her teeth.
Oh yeah, but you were there that morning.
She showed up and said,
oh, I'm so mad at everybody at home.
And they lived in Topanga, she had a daughter
and they were doing work on the house.
And she just ran out and had a fight with her daughter
and got in the car and the driver brought her in.
And she said, I got a toothbrush,
I had to leave home in my pajamas and my robe.
Yeah, but she just always needed to have attention,
but she truly is, was one of the most talented,
amazing women.
Oh, incredible.
She was a concert pianist.
Yeah.
I remember, I was at a few different events with her,
and just before you go out on stage,
she'd come up and just mess your hair up.
Yes.
And she did that to Mary,
and I think Betty took her aside and said,
knock it off, because Mary, this was towards the end,
shortly before she died.
And I think it was the last time she was ever on camera,
but she had diabetes and her hair was so fragile.
Everything about her was so fragile.
And Claris just can't resist, you know,
she was one of those people who needed to get attention
and got very mischievous.
Yeah, I remember she was coming up
and she was inserting herself into this scene that I had.
I just remember she was wanting to do something.
She wasn't part of the scene.
She wanted to do something with me.
And I'm like, I'm not going to talk to Laura Sleespen, no.
But surely someone of a higher power is going to stop her.
And Georgia Engel finally came up to me and was like,
you can't let her do that.
She's an Oscar winning actress. She knows better. I was like, you can't let her do that. She's an Oscar winning actress.
She knows better. I was like,
I'm not going to do anything.
I'm going to let someone else tell her that she can't do that.
Eventually, the director came over and was like,
let's maybe not do that thing you were doing.
Yeah. Andy Cato, probably.
Yes. Yeah, probably.
But one thing I remember so specifically,
there was a moment where all of
those cast
members were sitting around a table together and they just started reminiscing and talking
about different cameraman on the show or do you remember so and so.
And the cameramen of Hot Cleveland just put their cameras down and we all just like let
them catch up for a little while.
And people started slowly taking out their phones and recording. I have footage of them just catching up.
Then at one point, Betty White was like,
what are we doing? Can we move on?
Like she was saying, again, this was her job.
She came in every day and it was fun for her to catch up,
but she also wanted to keep the ball rolling.
Yeah.
We had so many of those days,
like the Don Rickles with them,
and with Tim Conway.
One of my favorites was Carol Burnett played my mother.
I know.
I just kept thinking,
I never in a million years,
when I was a kid and watched that show every Saturday night,
thought this woman someday is going to be my mom.
There's a great blooper of when she was on and you
entered into the scene and a recreation of the famous Bob Mackie.
Her name is wearing the drapes.
Yeah, the drapes.
And she just loses it.
So fun, so much fun.
Did you guys ever do a, you never did a live show, did you?
Not from Modern Family, no.
We did like live table reads for, you know, what they do like for your consideration events
and stuff.
And that was always really fun for me because I love that immediate response.
But that was the closest we ever got to doing a live show.
Do you think that show would have worked if it was multicam?
I think it just would have been a different thing.
So much of it was the fact that it was a mockumentary, although we never explained what this was.
In a very early version of Modern Family,
they had written in the character of
a foreign exchange student that had stayed with Mitchell,
my character, and Claire when we were young.
He was coming back to do a documentary about
this family he lived with when he was a kid.
He was a foreign exchange student,
and the title of it was My American Family.
And they ended up cutting that character
and then renaming it Modern Family.
But you know, the construct of like,
it's still being a mockumentary was there,
but we never explained why.
And then like, you know, in the very early seasons,
we would really try and hold onto the reality
that we were with a film crew.
It's funny, because I don't even remember
thinking about that.
But if you watch early episodes, they're like,
oh, it actually is feasible that this is a reality show.
Yeah.
And then like, you know, season five, six, it's just like,
we're opening our doors, coming home from like getting groceries.
And there's a camera crew in our house.
Like no one questions that. Yeah.
Now for a quick break, but don't go away.
When we come back, Wendy shares how she and Betty White bonded over their love for animals,
the blunt advice she gave David Spade about dating a certain celebrity friend of mine,
and how she nearly ended up as Harrison Ford's on-screen love interest 30 years ago.
Okay, be right back.
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And we're back with more dinners on me.
Do you think Just Shoot Me,
you said Just Shoot Me was really kind of
what put you on the map, right?
I mean, I know you'd worked before.
Dream On sort of launched my career.
Right.
But hardly anybody saw it because it was on HBO in the early days.
Right.
Around what age were you when that happened?
I didn't do Dream On until I was 40.
So in my 30s, I was just knocking around doing guest things and Movies of the Week and some
off-off Broadway
and stuff like that.
I'm a very light bloomer is what I'm saying.
That's why I'm still working because I started so late.
So I didn't use up all my acting lives.
But she went to college for acting, right?
Yeah, I was a fine arts major with a minor in theater,
but that was mainly the idea.
It was either be an actress or be a veterinarian
and I wasn't terribly good at science.
So that decision was made for me.
Yeah, but you still have that love of animals,
obviously it's still so important to you.
Yeah.
When your mom was modeling,
was it like kind of, was it the 40s and 50s
that she was modeling?
Yeah, probably 48, 49 and there,
and she was in New York, and she was beautiful,
really beautiful.
And my dad went and said,
you need to come back and marry me.
They had met at University of Buffalo,
and he was nine years older.
He was there on the GI Bill.
So much happened though during that time, specifically in that industry.
When your mom was modeling, the idea of what a woman was in the household was so different
in the 40s and the 50s.
And when you were modeling, it was the beginning of the sexual revolution
and such a different thing.
Did your mom ever talk about like what it was like
to sort of be in that industry?
She had a blast.
And my mother, it was funny, when I first saw Mad Men,
I thought, boy, this is so not like what my mom
and her friends are like, because they were really fun
and they were kind of bodacious and...
Interesting.
Yeah, I just used to listen to them
and I'd imitate them all the time.
I've stolen shamelessly from my mother
and all of her friends for characters,
but they were really funny, great senses of humor,
but they just laughed all the time and she was gorgeous,
but I don't think she ever really knew she was.
So she was not at all full of herself.
She was very, very grounded.
But she was working as a model.
Yeah.
Yeah.
People were paying to take photos of her, yeah.
But she loved being a mom and she just was a very,
a very happy human being and seemed to embrace
every stage of her life.
Most of my good qualities come from her.
I love that.
How long did she live?
94.
Wow, that's a great life.
My dad was 101.
Oh, that's a great life. My dad was 101. Oh, that's incredible.
I am.
He was half Egyptian, so I blessed his heart.
He gave me good skin and longevity.
Yeah, he did.
Yeah, and she gave me grace and humor.
I've been thinking, I mean, I'm turning 50 this year
and I've been thinking a lot about, you know,
just you start doing that math of like,
where you're gonna be, you know,
especially if you have children,
like how old will I be when my kid's my age?
I have two kids now.
A four and a half year old and a two year old.
And you know, my mom passed away in November
and she was 76, which is so young.
But you got to meet your kids though.
She got to meet my kids, yeah, yeah, yeah.
What do you do, have a boy and a girl?
Two boys, yeah.
So when I hear people living to 101, I mean, first of do, have a boy and a girl? Two boys, yeah.
That's so great.
So when I hear people living to 101,
I mean, first of all, that just fills me with so much joy
because I kind of hope that for myself.
Like I love the idea that if my mom had been able
to live that way, she would have had a whole fourth act
of her life.
Oh, absolutely.
You know?
Yeah.
Yeah, that's incredible.
That's incredible that your dad lived that long.
But we never know.
Yeah, you never know.
We never know.
George and I used to do the New York Times crossword puzzle in the morning before rehearsal.
And then he would flip to the obituaries and go, oh, they're calling my class.
And I thought, man, that's what starts to happen.
I think we have to savor every day that we have here because if you let the noise make
you too insane,
particularly with things that are out of your control for the most part, it's like you have
to really be surgical about how you're going to engage and how you can meaningfully start
to move the needle, but you don't want to give up whatever this is every day.
It's like I have to start my day every day with a gratitude ritual of thank you for what remains.
Thank you for the beauty of this amazing world we live in.
And thank you for those I love and send out healing
and for us to be kinder to each other.
And just to reset and with an intention
of not squandering what we have left.
Right.
You seem so grounded and.
Well, I'm insane some of the time.
But...
In what ways are you insane?
But I'm much better than I used to be.
I mean, every once in a while,
I'll just start to spin out
and just it's all too overwhelming.
Oh, same.
And my husband is so good at going,
okay, take a deep breath.
This is not your fight.
Just kind of putting it in perspective a little bit.
Your husband's a carpenter? Is it?
He's a builder.
Yeah.
And how did you two meet?
In a slum in Tijuana.
Wait, say that again?
In a slum in Tijuana, Mexico.
With this group from Brentwood Presbyterian Church, and my ex-husband and I had split
up, and Mary Kay Place, who was a dear friend, said, you need to get out of your own way and go do something
with somebody else.
So why don't you come on this trip through this church.
We got there, they were the rowdiest bunch
and they were singing around the kumbaya,
around the campfire, but it was a really great group
of people and Richard was like the foreman.
And one night we were all sleeping in a field,
this farmer's field with tents and stuff,
and I went out to pee in the field
in the middle of the night,
and I went behind what I thought was a rock
and it was Richard.
You peed on him.
You marked your territory.
Well, I'm right behind him.
That was the beginning.
And then the next day he said,
"'So what's your story?'
And I went,
"'Well, I don't know, what's yours?'
And by the end of the weekend he said,
"'How would you feel about learning how to ride a motorcycle
and going to Africa with me this summer?
And I thought, that is like the best invitation
I've ever had.
That was so different from any guy I'd ever known.
And he was handy.
So we learned how to ride motorcycles
and went to Africa the next summer.
And I said, can we go to Paris sometime?
Yeah, yeah.
It's been 30 years.
Did you just celebrate your 30th anniversary?
It's gonna actually be this December.
Oh, happy anniversary.
That's incredible.
I know your ex-husband was in the business
and you said you dated musicians
and actors and people in the business.
I mean, what was, because when you met him,
you were doing really well.
You were on a show and you were a famous actress.
What was that like for him?
I think it's a tricky thing
when you're someone in the public eye.
And I think it does take someone
with a good sense of themselves to be able to live with us.
I don't think it's easy.
Yeah.
You know?
There's a lot of sacrifices that have to happen.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I also feel like there's something
to meeting someone later in not the 40s is late in life,
but like, you know, you've had-
It's all relative.
I think there's something about your independence feels
like it's more sacred.
So like going away, I find that going away
and spending time away from Justin is so healthy.
Do you want some coffee?
Yeah, can I just have a black coffee?
Black coffee?
Of course, like.
Could I do a,
could I do a decaf coffee?
Decaf Americano's okay?
Never order decaf.
Decaf Americano's great.
Okay, awesome, I'll be right back.
Thank you.
I wanted to ask a little bit just more about Betty White
because she was such a, I mean.
She's getting a forever stamp.
She's getting a stamp?
They're doing a forever stamp of Betty.
Oh, no way.
Yeah, we were supposed to all go and speak
but I'm gonna be in Canada.
Pretty great.
I mean, truly.
They do a big thing at the zoo.
She used to be the president of the zoo.
Yeah, she was a huge animal lover.
Did you guys bond over that?
Yeah, I'm sure.
No, she used to do this thing
where people would come to her and say, can I show you a picture of my baby?
And she'd go, oh yes, I'd love to see it.
And then she'd go, no, it's a child.
Oh, she's so good.
Yeah, she was.
I mean.
You know, the other thing she said she always wanted to be,
her parents took her camping all the time.
But she was thinking she would have been a forest ranger
if she wasn't an actress.
Really?
Yeah.
She loves the outdoors.
That's incredible.
She came over to my house for lunch.
She loved to be around the animals
and she came for lunch and I'd give her a tuna sandwich,
red vines, diet coke.
She lived on hot dogs.
She liked hot dogs.
Somebody said, oh, maybe somebody should talk to her
about her diet or something.
He said, are you fucking kidding me?
This woman is like 90.
She's still working.
She's gorgeous.
She's hilarious.
And she's brilliant.
Yeah.
No, she, she was the best.
What a gift to have that time with her.
Truly.
Yeah, it really was. I mean, I was lucky to have that week,
but thank you so much.
Thank you.
It's very good.
When you were doing Just Shoot Me,
I think David Spade and Julie Bowen were dating.
Right? Yes.
Oh yeah, he was pretty smitten with her.
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
She speaks so like highly of him.
She absolutely adores him.
Obviously that relationship did not work out, but like.
I think he screwed it up.
That's what she said.
That's what she alluded to.
We were all kind of thinking, don't mess this up.
This one's smart and beautiful and she got your number.
And I think he realized it.
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Was she around? Did you? She was. She came and she did a guest thing and I think he realized it. Yeah, yeah, was she around?
Did you?
She was, she came and she did a guest thing on Just Shoot Me.
Oh, she did?
Yeah.
And yeah, I think that was when I first met her.
And she was adorable and really funny,
and yeah, I just remember thinking, stupid idiot.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I love that, I love yeah. I love that.
I love these stories.
I have a few of them myself,
but like parts of you auditioned for that
that you didn't get and Diane and Shears is one of them.
I bet every woman my age auditioned for that.
Do you know if there was like significant interest?
Were you like in like callbacks?
I was called back.
And then when I saw her, I thought, well.
Shelly Long.
She's way went to totally different way.
And she was brilliant in it.
Yeah, no, that was one that got away.
And then I auditioned for,
I had done an eccentric commercial
when I was first living in New York
that was like one of those gifts that keeps on giving.
You know, where you're thinking,
oh my God, my master card or my American Express thing is,
what was that?
What danger, what fresh hell is this?
What are you doing to us?
Oh my God, they keep coming.
What is that?
Is this every dessert on the menu?
So the famous one that we have is a chocolate pudding.
We also have a peanut butter and cookie.
That looks delicious.
This is a peanut butter cookie?
Oh.
Peanut butter cookie, the jelly inside,
so like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
It's so dangerous.
We also have our polenta cake, it is gluten free.
That's polenta cake?
Polenta cake, that looks good.
And that's not too sweet, right?
It's not too sweet, no.
And then we have our fresh fruit tarts
with our raspberries and our grapefruits,
with a little bit of pistachio on top.
Insane.
Fresh fruit tart, that's what they called me in high school.
Okay.
Oh, it's gorgeous.
Thank you.
Thank you.
That looks gorgeous.
I might have to have a little bit of each.
Die, sugar die.
Oh, but anyway, so I did this eccentric commercial
and every time my rent would be due
or something was happening,
you know, I was waitressing on the side,
these wonderful residual checks would come in.
And apparently Steven Spielberg used to watch
a lot of commercials, and that's when he would get ideas
of who he wanted to see for things.
I get this call, Steven Spielberg,
who I don't think I knew who he was at that time,
and this guy George Lucas want you to come in to meet them.
They'd love the way you have a headache.
I had a fabulous headache.
I was on Valentine's Day, and I remember I was wearing, from Only Hearts, They love the way you have a headache. I had a fabulous headache.
It was on Valentine's Day.
And I remember I was wearing, from Only Hearts,
I had a red hoodie and red jeans on, with hearts
all over the front of them.
And I didn't know what I was going in there for.
And they said, we just saw you at a commercial,
and I think you might be the right type for this character,
Grace, in the first Indiana Jones movie.
And I went, really?
And we just talked and they put me on film
and they just interviewed me and stuff and we laughed.
We had a lovely time and I was there for, I don't know,
like 45 minutes or something and they said,
okay, so they'll send you sides and you come back on Monday
and we'll do a screen test.
I said, cool, happy Valentine's Day.
And I went home, I got completely snockered that night.
I think I got stoned, I was drinking, I was just like,
ah, this is it.
And then they called me like the next morning and said,
can you go in like now?
Because they have to go to London like tomorrow.
And I hung over.
Oh yeah, and I wasn't prepared.
I hadn't done anything.
I was at my boyfriend's house.
I didn't have the right clothes.
I didn't have anything.
And I just really sucked at that thing. And when I saw the prepared. I hadn't done anything. I was at my boyfriend's house. I didn't have the right clothes. I didn't have anything.
And I just really sucked at that thing.
And when I saw the movie, I thought,
that I would have killed him.
You would have killed that.
I totally killed him.
I mean, Karen's lovely,
but I just was really pissed off at myself.
So that was the one I blew the nose really sad.
I told Harrison that story.
He goes, really? I was gonna ask if you had told Harrison, yeah. But I was the one I blew the news really sad. I told Harrison that story. He goes, really?
I was going to ask if you had told Harrison, yeah.
But I love those moments too though when those, when you come back around to that and like,
oh, now I'm actually working with Harrison.
Yeah, it just took a while.
Yeah, it took a little while.
It just took me 15 years.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But I feel the same about, you know, Diane a little bit because you ended up on Frasier,
you know, working with Kelsey Grammer and like, yeah, you know, sort of coming at that world from a different way.
And John Mahoney.
John Mahoney.
Did you ever work with him?
Never did.
Huge fan of his.
No, John was so dear.
That was really fun to be part of that last season of that show.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's TV history.
We have overlapped a lot with the people we've worked with, between Steve Lottetam and Chris Lloyd and David Crane.
I feel like I'm on the right track because you've done really well.
I feel like you have a future in this business.
Do you?
Do you write too?
No, I direct a little bit, but I don't write.
Did you direct any Modern Families?
I didn't.
I was too scared because-
Would you rather direct something you're not in?
I think so.
Although I feel like I regret not taking the opportunity
to direct an episode of Modern Family
because that crew was so, they were my family
and it would have felt so comfortable doing that with them.
They would have taken care of me.
I know all that, the camera crew, the DP,
like they're all just so lovely
and I should have taken advantage of that.
Julie Bowen directed an episode, two episodes,
and she did a great job.
And seeing how well she handled it made me wish I had.
I just had this like nightmare of me telling Ed O'Neill
what to do after a 10 year relationship that I had with him
that I cherished so much.
I didn't want him to like have any ill will toward me.
Don't tell me what to do.
He wouldn't have because he is so respectful.
I had so much fun with him that day I worked with you guys.
I know.
I know he's the greatest.
He's hilarious.
He's the greatest.
I mean, and he truly is so supportive of me, but yeah, I never directed one and I wish I had.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
When you are looking back on, you know, your career
and the eras that you've been able to move through,
I mean, how do you think about Hollywood and ageism now?
And like, how do you think that they've changed?
Because I feel like you've done a, I don't know if you've just been lucky, but it feels
like you've been very supported by these roles that you've been able to play.
But I don't know if that's just luck or if that's just tenacity.
Like what, I don't know.
I think part of it is luck and timing, you know?
And then if you do get the opportunity
being incredibly grateful and leaving it on the mat
every time you get a chance to play.
And it's really surreal because for me,
the last couple of years, I've had more work
than I've ever had in my career.
You're literally jumping into TV shows.
I'm on three.
Oh, that's right. That's right. That's right. The one in Vancouver.
Yeah.
Yeah. And it's like an embarrassment of riches. I feel a little bit embarrassed
about it. Like when I, and so then I think, okay, well, I'm on, I'm on these
shows and now I just have to get my friends on these shows. And that's what I
do is immediately find out, okay, go to the casting people, the executive
producer. These are the people we need to get on the show. Yeah that's what I do is immediately find out, okay, go to the casting people, the executive producer.
These are the people we need to get on the show this year.
Nepotism.
Yeah.
Ever since I met you when I first came to LA,
like you've always just been so kind
and so lovely and generous.
And why wouldn't we be?
We caught the brass ring.
I know.
There's so many people, and I'm sure you know this,
it just aren't.
I know, I know.
And I tell people too, just remember, we were going to put a sign up on Hot in Cleveland
on the set saying, leave your diva at the door.
Because thank goodness, they all were really good women.
But I think there's something about being generous when you have an opportunity
to like be in a great show.
It's like when we have guests,
I go up to the guests and say, welcome.
We're so happy to have you here.
Because I know how much that means to me when I say,
because we're still little kids
and it's the first day is cool.
When you're not a regular on something
or if you're joining a film or a play
and things are up and running,
it's you're kind of like,
is anybody gonna sit with me at lunch?
I mean, I still think about that.
Like, I wonder if they'll be nice.
That's right.
But if you believe,
I think that we're all either canine or feline.
Okay.
And I'm definitely canine.
So you realize, okay,
some people are gonna sit back and watch and wait to see what they think. That's the feline. I'm not saying I'm always canine. So you realize, okay, some people are gonna sit back and watch and wait to see my face.
I'm not saying I'm always outgoing,
but I know I'm more canine than feline.
So if it's up to me to be the first person to say,
hey, I'm Wendy, how are you?
That just can be enough to soften somebody
and like let them know I'm lying on my back,
my paws are in the air and I'm not going to threaten you.
And I just want to sniff your butt.
I just want to sniff your butt.
But not in a bad way.
In a friendly way.
Thank you for doing this with me.
Oh, it's my pleasure.
I really love you so much.
I love you too.
And dinner's on me, don't worry.
I know it is. Hahaha. Hahaha. This episode of Dinners on Me was recorded at Huckleberry in Santa Monica.
Next week on Dinners on Me, you know her from the Netflix series Three Body Problem,
and more recently starring opposite Aaron Paul in the sci-fi flick Ash, it's Eiza Gonzalez.
We'll get into her journey from teen stardom in Latin America to breaking into Hollywood and what
she's learning working alongside stars like Erin Paul, Natalie Portman, and John Krasinski.
And if you don't want to wait until next week to listen, you can download that episode right now
by subscribing to Dinners on Me Plus. As a subscriber, not only do you get access
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Dinners on Me is a production of Sony Music Entertainment
and a kid named Beckett Productions. It's hosted by me, Jesse Tyler Ferguson. It's executive produced by me and Jonathan Hirsch.
Our showrunner is Joanna Clay. Our associate producer is Alyssa Midcalf.
Sam Baer engineered this episode. Hans-Dale Shi composed our theme music.
Our head of production is Sammy Allison. Special thanks to Tamika Balanz Kalasny and Justin Makita.
I'm Jesse Tyler Ferguson. Join me next week.