Dissect DJs - Mickey Avalon - My Dick (feat. Dirt Nasty & Andre Legacy)

Episode Date: April 1, 2025

Episode 134 breaks down the ultimate dick-measuring jam with Mickey Avalon's 2006 classic "My Dick".  We open up the Dissect DJ soundbox and put it to work as our rating system to judge each dick joke bar for bar.  Which line is best, and is this the all time dick track? We go through all the top contenders, let's DISSECT! Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

D.D.D.J. My dick. Cost a late night fee. Yo, dick. Got to HIV. My dick plays on the double feature screen. Yo dick, we're straight to DVD. My dick, bigger than a bridge.

Yo, dick. What's going all, y'all? We've got to talk some shit today. But in the meantime, let me introduce myself. I'm DJ. MCJJJJJKJKJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJ. What up, Steve? Better talk some dicks.

We're about talking some dicks. Straight dick up in here. in here. What? Yo dick. Let's do it. Because we are the DJs that like to spit it, mix it, throw it back, and talk about dicks in it. And dissect that ball, my God.

In today's song, we got My Dick by Mickey Avalon. It's a funny one, guys. It's a good one. This song takes me right back to 2011. Even though it says it was actually created in 2006. Okay. But I have memories of it. and like right around like maybe it was like 2010, 2011.

It's hard to say these days exactly where you were at a specific time. But I feel like it was around that era that I remember this being a regular in my rotation. Maybe I discovered it late. I don't know. But Mickey Allen, he had a run in that time period. And nobody ever saw him again. Nobody ever saw him again. Now, I heard this song for, forget what movie, unfortunately.

Was it a Harold and Kumar movie? I feel like it might have had. It might have been a hero. It might have had a run in that. One of my times where I was over, you know, doing my thing on Netflix and trying to find a song. And then I put a movie on. This song came on. I was like, that hit.

That song hits. And then you listen to the words and it's funny as shit. But I never actually listen to all the things he actually says about his dick. But I just know out the gate somehow he has HIV. But no, he doesn't. That's not what he says at all. He says, your dick. Oh, your dick, yeah, that's right.

It's the second one that he goes here. And then he's the charger. his dick big as big as the chargers. Okay, we're going to go through. And your dick is as big as a 14 year old or something. Here's what I want to do today. We're going to go through the lyrics like we always do. But I want to play a little game.

I would like to get some sound of X involved. So we're going to go through each one of these and we are going to rate them based on three different levels. Okay. If we think it was a hilarious bar and a good bar like top top of it, we're going to play this sound. Not that sound. Not that one. Okay. Okay, okay.

That's going to be the one if it was like a weak bar. Like, I'm not feeling that one. That's also in the weak bar variety. I thought that was like a swing, like a stick. How about this one? Ooh. That's it. That's the one.

That's the one that was like, okay, that one. That one crushed it, Mickey. I like that line. And then we got to have a, and all right, all right. And then there was also a medium bar level that I'm afraid of trusting Justin with because he seems to be not on the same page with me right now. All right, what is it?

No, that was also in the week. Any of those can fall in the weak category. Why does it go so long? I'm going, I apologize. The soundbite's too long. It went like two seconds longer than a native. No. What is that even?

It's a medium. We're talking for medium? Yes. There was a medium one that I told you it was good beforehand. It's the, um. No. That's that. That sound like, that somebody had a run in the 90s.

You remember that? It did. What was it? If you heard that song, a movie you're about to get... They used to play before, like, every movie theater. It, like, yeah, that, it made you feel like, this is what sound can be. Yeah, yeah, THHX.

That was it. I like that as the medium one because it's kind of like... Yeah, it was like, you try to joke. All right. It's somewhat landed, but, all right. So, let's start running right through the top. What about if it sucks? What about...

We went, like, any of the first three, played. You can literally just make it any of them. Okay, if it sucks, we're going with this. We're going with bo.

Yeah, okay. Booh. Okay. I agree. I sign off on that. So just officially, if it's a good dick. Good dick joke.

Good dick joke? That one. If it's a medium dick. If it's like a eh. And if it's a shitty, shitty dick. It's like the ooh,

but more extended like, uh. It's actually a good boo because it's not like aggressive. It's not like a hate-filled boo, but it's like we don't like what you've done here. Yeah, all right. We don't want you in this piece. All right.

And if it's a really bad dick, we go. Sure. Cool. I don't know if we'll need that. But we'll see what happens. Okay, so should we run through the lyrics? At least for the start, the ones that we already did. Yes, yes.

Yes. So basically Mickey Avalon, by the way, it doesn't have at least. Oh, wait, no, it's Andre Legacy. Beautiful. Mickey Avalon, Andre Legacy teamed up on this one. Literally did a whole song just about comparing my dick to your dick. And, you know, it's a hilarious concept. Real quick, if you follow our YouTube, I might show my dick in this episode.

So watch for it. The subscribers through the roof. We're trying to push the subscribership. I just show my dick right now. Can you see it? And then if you think that dick costs a late-night fee, hit a subscribe on that. Hit a subscribe. Give us a rate a follow, a subscribe, and a comment.

Just please never go, never. Don't. But if you think that dick got the HIV, that's a fucking bold one to start with. With the whole, like, gameplay. Like, you know, they wrote a bunch of these. Yeah, they were like, dude, they had a list of them. And they were like, go. They did this.

Before they put this together, it was a whole, like, pro versus con. Pro dick comments, cons. And then the first one he started with is HIV. Can not let me get it. Not feeling that one. Not off to a great start, Mickey. But then he goes, My Dick plays on a double-feature screen.

Yo, Dick, went straight to DVD. Ooh. All right. I'll give it to him. That one's all right. I would have gone like... Oh, you went, you know, okay, you went with. Yeah, that's pretty good.

It's pretty good. All right. Andre legacy, you do Andres. All right, you don't have the lyrics. I'll keep the lyrics going. Just do both. Yeah, I'll do the sound effects. You do both.

My dick. Bigger than a lot. bridge. Yo dick look like a little kids. I will say, yeah, it's just basic. That one's basic. That's simple. Especially bigger than a bridge.

It's like, okay. How big is the bridge? The bridge can go many sizes. It could be golden state or it could be, you know, the local bridge over the freeway. Is it? Maybe it's a bridge on like a Lego set. There's a lot of ways. A lot of ways of bridges.

You didn't say what kind of bridge. Did not explain. It looked like a little kids is very big. All right my dick large like it charges the whole team I was so good the whole team That's my favorite I love the way just threw the whole team in there that that's my favorite Yeah yeah that's probably with the bench. It is It's a bag man yo shit look like you 14 kind of the same jac

Focing on the kid kind of the same joke you made twice in a row on Trey kids having small dicks which I did have one as a small kid and always was like When is this thing going to do its thing and and realize oh, I'm a grower What is my thing going to do its thing? And realize, oh, I'm a grower. That's why it never did this thing. It has to get, you know, it has to get, it has to turn into the, Tell me you have a sound effect.

Tell me you have a sound effect. It has to grow. Has to show you what time it is. I have this vision of like you take it off a robe and then suddenly like the light, the shut, the light just turns in like a bright fucking like the sun's too bright and it just holy. Like they're looking at the fucking Holy Grail I'm like Jesus

But yeah I had to find that out That's why So yeah I had that one I liked Just because Look large My dig large

Like the charge is the whole team I just like the way Through the whole team in there It overcomes the fact that he basically Made the same joke About your dick twice Where do we leave off though No just keep going

We'll keep going Just name off a couple more And then we'll get back into it My dick Locked in a cage Right yo dick suffer from stage fright. Okay, I see what he did there.

I don't know what he did on the first one. Locked in a cage. Right. And then he threw it right. Yeah. Well, he just had the epic charger line right before that. Oh, this is going back. Oh, no, this is Dirk nasty.

There's three people involved here. All right. This is a fun song to get three people involved. Let everybody have a chance at fucking binging up their dick. I will say kind of a complex song. Kind of like, if you feel like you need to make a whole song, not just bigging up your dick. but also like calling somebody like,

no, it's not even enough that I tell you about how my dick is. I'll tell you how bad your dick is. Your dick suffers from stage fright. Your dick looks like it's 14. Yeah, your dick sucks. Your dick's got HIV. Like, significantly better. I have a significant better dick than your dick.

And let me. Standing on stage, they'd be like, my dick's the best in the room. Like, almost guarantee if you need to do a whole song about singing about how your dick is better than everybody else's dick. With that said, I... Probably not a great dick. I don't know.

Your dick might look 14. I just pulled my dick out. If you guys are watching the YouTube, you would have got a glimpse. Play the sound. Of what? The pull your dick out song. You already did it. Ooh.

Not that one. The THX one. Oh, yes. Oh, Ryan performed that like a master improv class. The editing job that Castle is going to do on that. It's fantastic with my smile and his performance. Watch the YouTube. I pull it out my dick.

Probably just screen. All right. Let's listen to a bit. Let's do it again. Let's get the beat going. Let's get it back again. My dick. Cost a late night fee.

Yo dick got to HIV. My dick plays on the double feature screen. Yo dick. Went straight to DVD. My dick. Bigger than a bridge. Yo dick. Look like a little kids.

My dick. Large like the chargers. The whole team. Yo shit look like you 14. My dick. Locked in a cage, right. Yo dick. Some up from stage.

Like my dick, so hot it's stolen, yo dick, look like Gary Coleman. My dick, pink and big. Yo dick stinks like shit. My dick got a season. Dude. Hey, you didn't finish the bar. Finish it. Let him finish it off, though.

You were just... See that whole thing one more time. I'm going to repeat the whole thing. Here we go. Let's see it. That the whole thing, just the last. I got a season dude. Yo dick needs a tweezer dude.

Peak. All right. Where do you put that? Your dick. My dig pink and big. No, wait, we, before that, we forgot to get to. My dick so hot. It's stolen.

Yo dick. Look like Gary Coleman. It's pretty. So, some of these, it's like, hey, you kind of, I'm not sure we're going with the first part, but you landed the plane on the second half. Yeah. You land in the second every time. The second one's come hitting hard.

Give me the sound bite for it look like Gary Coleman. I got it. No. Why didn't I put you in charge of sound effects? That wasn't... Oh. Yeah, there it is. Okay.

Okay. My dick... Shing! Swing! My dick. Pink and big. Your dick stinks like shit. That's so good.

You think that's good? It stinks. shit. Personally, I would give that a fucking... You're giving that a shit? You're giving that a... Pink and big. Yellow shit. Stinks like shit. It's simple, effective. You get a good visual. Both sides. You get the pink and big.

You're like, ugh. And then you're like stinks like shit. Like you... You know, I don't know, man. I'm liking both of those. The fact that one came from Mickey Avalon is a little bit like... Yeah, you could... Are you sure that you're doing that? It's pink and big. Are you sure about that one?

Okay. Then he follows with, my dick got a seizure do. Yo dick needs a tweezoo. Wait, what does a Caesar do? I feel like I'm going to Google it. Okay. Because I want to, it sounds like it's like a hairstyle, which if it is, is a funny bar, but also kind of makes my point about why, I don't know if he should be calling out other people for,

Wait, is it this? It looks like it's like a crazy like shit across fade, which I don't know why your dick looks like that, sir. You might want to get that checked out. He has a fade, huh? Maybe it's a pub situation. I don't know. I don't know.

But the tweezer dude, I don't know. You know what? I skip past that. I don't even want to give a sound effect. It's confusing. Your dick, your dick commentary needs to be straightforward, one that we can understand, register and laugh at within half a second, which is why.

Still, the king of the mountain is the San Diego Chargers, the whole team. Andre Legacy, let me hear what you got. Wait, before we go there, can I just tell you one of my favorite dick songs? You want to talk about dick songs now? I just want to show you one of my favorite. Justin has a whole playlist called Dick Songs. We have never asked why. If you ever come to my club, when I'm DJing, you will get a dose.

There's a certain crowd that he looks out at and he's like, you will get a dose of dick. Let's go, let's go Dick playlist right now. Is that why this fucking weird play-lilet video has been playing this whole time? Yeah, exactly. It is such a distracting video. Can you just break it down with me? Yeah, they keep showing this like huge guy in a speedo.

I play this at the club almost every single time I DJ. Let's get to the words. Let's listen to there for a second way. You need some fucking tweezers to put that little thing away. All the dick I have ever seen in my whole life. Get the fuck out of. Einy, weeny, teeny, weeny, shriveled little short. All right.

first of all that video was the most like 1993 shit I'm just glad that we got to a point eventually that there was an era there in like the early mid-90s specifically early 90s where they really liked like putting dudes in speedos

for some reason remember that? That was a thing I thought it was a thing I used to wear speedos at that time of my life thinking they were the thing never let that come back I was eight thinking it was the thing and it was not yeah like I feel like

Like back then, if you watch like MTV Spring Break, it would be a bunch of like dudes coming out with like a speedo and be like, like, yeah. They're like dancing in that fucking song and shit. American gladiators. Well, they just kind of had leotards and shit. Same thing, dude. But, you know, it's a difference when you're like parading out there in a fucking straight up speedo. Like, yes. Look at my fucking dick.

You think this is a short dick? Why is you called it a short dick? Nobody's ever referred to a dick as short. It's either small. It's big. It's like, you know, economy size. You know, there's other, there's other as big as a bridge. Or like, you know, it's, that'll work.

There's a lot of ways you can fucking refer to a dick. Short, that's not a fucking term. One of the few reasons I play. Are you laying down? Just be like. Well, one of the few reasons I play that song. Tell me you think my dick is tall. You can, while DJing this song, you can point out anybody that does have a short dick, why they get uncomfort.

me I'm okay I got the average dick I know I got the average dick and I'm okay with the average dick so when the song comes out I'm like don't want no short dick I'm like that's not me this is exactly

I don't want no short that ain't me this is exactly why she made this song because her whole concept was like anybody doesn't like this song has a short dick that's why but here's my issue with the song fucking sucks dude it's not a good song I don't that song doesn't make me want to

at all it's annoying it's got that like annoying 90s sound where it's like the singer sounds annoying and they think that's gonna make you be like oh but you'll get used to it it'll be like eventually you love it all right well let's go to the late 2000s and do another dick song that one of my favorites by tea flea you remember him who teafley I don't know who that is She won't fuck me Well, I'm trying to fuck her too So I give her this dick Yeah, I give her this dick

Yeah, she want this dick She gonna get this dick Yeah, I give her this dick Yeah, she want this dick She's gonna get this dick Yeah This one's talking about See, that's what I mean

She don't get this dick You don't get this? That's a celebration of dick right there I like a song that has a good celebration of dick that's like, Let me show you how my use this. I'm going to put this to work, you know what I mean? Give me a good beat.

They can rap about it. That song did it so much better than the last song did, okay? What other dick jams you got? Last one. I'll say that old dance and... I'll say that song was doing nothing for me until it got to the part when it was like throw that out

no don't do that then I was like all right this is pretty much jam but like before that I was like this song is boring and don't care about it

but yeah it got I got there's another dick song that I used to listen to it was called that good

but I can't remember the artist was it was it was it glasses malone or something I was trying to remember I used to have a run

on my playlist probably about like 13 years ago yeah I Wait, play for the beginning Oh, he wanted to be in the Yeah, that whole beat

Because it's got the Warren G Purshine division, baby Dollar Sign, That good dick Playing what that shit do Dollar sign The label, baby The whole team been getting paper, baby

President Tronis in the bread bottoms Anything teased a bitch You know I got it You know I got it See, there's a way to do it There's a way to make a good dick jam I don't know man Short dick man is my favorite dick man

It's my favorite dick song. I'm giving short dick, man. My favorite. The last one I listened to are the ones that we just played. Just because it just sounds like shit, dude. It's an annoying fucking song. It's like that, uh, is that the lover where she's doing like, Puky, porty, meady, meady, needy, nah,

it's the same song, right? Don't want any, teeny, teeny, teeny little short dick. Meanwhile, in the music video, there's the guys that literally got to play, like, the short dick man. Like, she's like, got a fucking magnifying glass. out and it's like a guy who's like a nerd like imagine getting that fucking acting gig. We're looking

for a kind of a small guy who's like, no, just getting a little. Who are you going to be? You pull out a magnifying glass. Who are you going to be? You're going to it's going to it'll be too big for the. Set that shit on fire. Did you land on it's going to be too? You're not as

sharp as this as Dirt Nasty or Mickey Avalon or Andre Legacy. No, I'm not. Should we listen to them some more? My dick. Let's go My dick Is like

Super size Yo dick Look like Two fries My dick More mass than the earth Yo dick Half's death

It needs work My dick Been there and done that Yo dick Sit sit with Ducks cap My dick VIP Yo shit

Needs ID All right You got some bars Right there to go over I feel like We need to like Rate these With like a sign

For our YouTube audience We got the sound effects We got the sound effects. That's even better. Okay, so Andre Legacy comes back with my dick is like super size. Yo dick look like two fries. I'm going to give that one of these. Are you giving my thumbs? You give me another.

No, fucking. Jesus. Sure. Sure. I think that one's pretty good. He's going with a fast food theme. Those are the two ways I would go with the fast food references. The dick complements each other.

Go ahead. What else? My dick. All right. Now what I'm talking. Let me go Dennis on you. My dick will mess than the earth. Yo dick, half staff.

It needs work. Yeah. Okay. I see what he's doing there. I get, you know. Okay. Sorry. I like how it started.

My dick. I'm back to dirt nasty. My dick. Been there, done that. Yo dick. sits there with a dunce cap. Did he insult his dick at the beginning of that, though? That didn't sound like a fucking...

What did he say again? My dick, been there, done that. Is that an insult? Yeah, he's basically like telling him his dick is old. You're like, yeah, no, you don't need to deceive my dick. You fucking, you've already, you've already had something comparable to its nature. So, go ahead to your dick, which sits there with a dunce cap, which actually... I would give that a...

My dick. VIP Your shit Needs ID That's a good one I like that Can we give that a big old Ooh

See I like the themed one I like when he keeps the theme From like joke to Like insult You know what I mean Those are my kind of jam What's the next one All right

Then all three of them Come in with It's time That we let the world know Dude You gotta let your girl know D S is the best In the business

P.S. We got Dicks like Jesus Yeah Dicks like Jesus like Jesus. What's just happen there? Don't worry about it. It's time that we let the world know.

Dude, the best and the best. You think, big, don't even function. My dick served a whole luncheon. Yo, dick, look like a size of a pumpkin. Yo dick look like McCulley Coking. Do you think Jesus had a good deal? Dude, big like a pumpkin. I don't even know what.

Big like a pumpkin. He went right to do. Does Jesus have a good day? They called it out. I didn't say what they said. Big like a pumpkin. I was imagine. Your dig looks like McCulley Calkin, dude.

Now, is you talking about like Home Alone McCoy? Definitely talking about it. Drug addict McCollie Cokin? Or current McCollickin who actually saved himself and is actually doing quite well. They're clearly referring to Home Alone McCullochal when he was like eight. Oh, and he was like, ah! Yeah. Ah!

Yeah. Yeah. We skipped over. My dick needs no introduction. Yo dick doesn't even function. I like the rhyme. It's whatever on the references. It's kind of...

I can't explain it, but that was actually the most appropriate sound bite you had of all the lot. My dick served a whole luncheon. Yo dick looked like a little munchkin. It's pretty good. Yeah, that's appropriate. I'm getting the hang of this sound like to have a whole luncheon. We're getting there. We're figuring it out.

You can't start me off and fresh and expect me to be legit. It's not going to happen. I have to take some... We're learning on the fly. We're learning on the fly. My dick doesn't know what it's doing. Yo dick looks like it's in a canoe. Never mind.

You didn't follow it up with canoeing. It was right there on the table for you. Cano is not a word, but canoe is not... Sure it is. Yo dick, big as a canoeing. Yeah. Yeah, it doesn't work, right? It doesn't work.

All right. Good, good love and yo dick, good for nothing. My dick, it's like a M-16. Yo dick, we got some good ones in there. They came with some bangers in that one. See, that's what I'm saying. They got some good ones that you buried in the second verse. And you let off with your dick got HIV.

Fuck, man. Okay, so we already went over size of a pumpkin, your dick, like my colleague Holokin. Yep, yep, yep, yep. Pumpkin, weird size for a dick. Weird, that's what I was trying to say last time. Say that out there. It's large. It's bulbous and round, and I don't think that's what you want your dick to be, but.

By the way, I always thought of rotunt. It's a rotund. It's a great word to describe that. Mickey comes back. in with my dick good good loving yo dick good full nothing could we just say that micky's lines are probably he's just the worst every time his doesn't have any creativity it's like literally just like my dick is good yours is bad your dick is not like yeah they're just not yeah his is the worst Andre legacy i think is actually saving the song what's he got my dick bench press 350 yo dick couldn't shoplift

at thrifty and for all you you youngest that no thrifty was a store that we used to shop at and had delicious ice cream and had ice cream at it delicious ice cream i always knew it as the grocery store with ice cream is right aid with ice cream yeah they always had like a full-on like baskin robins like spread and it was like i forced my parents to give me ice cream every time we went to thrifty so they would avoid thrifty i remember going to thrifty after like soccer games if i like won the game they'd be like yeah let's get some ice cream and i'd be like fuck yeah they got the cones with a little like yeah and then they would go

get their prescription. More affordable than Baskin'Rubbs, so they're more happy to go there. And they had the same flavors, except for they would have, like, Baskin would have some of those crazy ones with being like, crazy sugar. They had 31 flavors. Dirty had eight. They had the basic ones that you wanted. They had cookie dough. You know? It was good. They had the Rocky. What else? What else? Sherbert.

Where the fuck that was? Rainbow Sherbert. Got some of that in the freezer if you want some. I just randomly remembered it last week that I loved out as a kid. Haven't had it since then, but we're about to run out. Dirt nasty comes back. My dick, pretty damn skippy. Your dick.

Hungry as a hippie. That one sucked. I didn't like that one, dude. Give me a sound bite on that one. I got vicious on that. Yeah, that was weak. That was weak. Here comes Mickey again.

My dick, don't fit down the chimney. Yo dick, like a kid from the Philippines. Classic. Swing. Swing. Dude, so good. That's Mickey's best. wine yet yeah he read it but and we're not making fun of you babe I know you're

Filipino and your parents are smaller and all right go ahead Andre comes back my dick like an M16 your dick broken vending machine what I do like how they ripe it's a good rhyme we're talking from the bar standpoint gets up the two differences. It's like, this one's fucking crazy. And then this one's really. When you're doing this the way we're doing it, though, like you're constantly like actually like comparing to like,

okay, how is that describing a dick? Broken vending machine. So it's a large metal structure that doesn't accept dollar bills right now. Is that what's happening? That M8 doesn't work when you press it so you can't get your Doritos. What are we trying to say here? Legacy. Okay, Dirt Nassie comes back.

My dick. parts the seas your dick parts and queens it feels like something you would like have to go one I do like the Moses reference on that yeah yeah alright wait I found one more dick song

you don't know this one hit it up such a sadness I was gonna freaking little kempson I am ooh la who I do I

go A lot of faces All hell I've been With different races A white dude His name was John He had a B. Roo's tattooing in his arm.

He asked me if I'd be his date for the prom, and he'd buy me a horse, a portion of farm. From down south used to like me to spankling, but it's now. And Thorny, he was a thawing. He didn't give a fuck, that's what I liked about. He ain't my pussy from dark to the moment.

Call this girl up and told her we was boned. Puerto Rican Bobby used to be a deeke, but now he'd be sucking me off on the weekend. And this black dude, I call King Kong, he had a big ass dick. See, right there. gonna cut off right there well that's where that dick I realized midway through that she actually

wasn't talking about dick except for except for that guy that had a yeah but you can even get to the part where it's like that's Cisco part yeah but it's like how many licks does it take it's not even talking about dick talking about a vagina you know I realized after but still listen to this part one more time he had a big ass dick and a hurricane tongue

he had a big ass dick and a hurricane tongue it's bringing a lot to the table there really was the only dick part of that song after and the rest is mostly about Foxy is that Foxy is that Foxy That was a little Kim. Little Kim. He's, he's going to confuse them both.

Their songs always sounded very similar. That wasn't the song I was looking for. This is the one I was looking for. Magic stick. Once I get hit twice, I'll hit the baddest sticks. Showed it on, believe me to call me the night. And I showed you magic. What?

Magic stick. There it is. That's the dick with the magic stick. It's just a little less directed. I think I'm learning. My Dick. If you want to have an ode to Dick's song, It's got a Lenin hip-hop.

I don't really want to hear any other genre touch it, man. Yeah? It's got to be a dope hip-hop song because they just seem to know how to do it right, man. I should there's anything else I can find that might be. Don't, hey, be careful with your search on that one. I see. Rep songs about dick.

Dick, Dick, Sorrow, man. Don't Google him and search it. What, do we get to, my dick, rumble in the jungle, yo, dick, touched by your uncle. I don't think we got that way yet. That's a good one. Let me get the sound bite. Of what?

You got to be on the same page with me, man. I just said it was a good one. Wait a minute. I got this. Ooh. Yeah. You know what? There's a Dick song from Back in the Day.

Do you got a Back in the Day? You know what I was just thinking? Nobody does hip-hop like... Chuck Barry. What? Chuck Barry does not have a dick song. Oh, yeah. Are you ready?

Here we go. I'm so ready. This song's going to be about dicks. When I was... was a little beep she told me i love to play with my diggling i stand by my take that these need to live in hip-hop because everything else that tries it what the fuck was that song even trying to say i don't know it's that song about like his mom who gave him his diggling or something shit i don't know is that about like touching your shit as an adult what the fuck was i mean as a

kid what the fenging what the fuck was that i feel like he just made a song about like his first little get himself off experience no but his grandma gave it to him a man that means that It makes it weirder. Everything about that song was uncomfortable. And I have a feeling it, like, played on the radio or something. Oh, that was a top 100 for sure. I'm imagine just, like, families, like, riding in their fucking car when all they had was radio and, like, songs were probably. And then that just song came on.

It wasn't supposed to make the whole family uncomfortable. Yeah. That was the worst song we've played yet. My dangling. I can't think of a single setup that would make that song, like, a good, except thing to play in any regard. What kind of party would that actually work? I don't want to hear.

I'll download it and I won't mix that shit. You will clear your dance floor. My danglely, my dangling, my dangling, it would be a dope remix. I like that you always go to the exact same beat when you're like, oh no, I'll just remix it. I'll be like, there's two beats you go to. It's do, do, do, do, do do do do do do do do do.

Either does that, either does that, or. And I'll tell you what, neither one of those work with that fucking song at all. You're so... Let's finish his dick song. My dick, rumbling to jungle. Yo dick got touched by your uncle. My dick goes to yoga. Yo dick.

Fruit roller. My dick. Great A beef. Yo dick. Made a geek. My dick. Sick and dangerous. Yo dick.

Quick and painless. My dick. Nuff said. Dick loves for it. It's time that we let the world know, dude. PS is the best in the business. That dicks like Jesus. P.S. is the best in the business.

P.S. We got dicks like Jesus. Dicks like Jesus. Dix like Jesus. They actually call out D.S. Got the best in the business. P.S. We got dicks like Jesus. I believe that D.S. could stand for Dicex.

You got to think about it. And we do got D. like yo my shit be hanging on a cross like a crucifix it'd be like whoa whoa whoa too much went too far there too far get dipping my dick turns water into wine your shit cries the whole time oh damn my dick looks like turpentine yo dick wants to be like mine my dick feeds the hungry yo dick begs for money I'm staying on the Jesus trip. I'm trying to think of what would Jesus do? Feed the hungry.

That's a dissect. DJ's dissecting dicks for you. Can I tell you about my Mickey Avalon experience? Yeah. It's a basic one. I one time was at an American junkie over here in Hermosa, and he was performing there. And it's kind of cool when you're at a place like that

that's kind of like a little small room. And I've seen it a few times there where it's like, I was a pretty known artist. And they're doing a performance right there for like, you know, maybe 100 people tops. Sure. And that was when this song was like in my rotation. And the other song that he always did that I, he had like three songs at one time that I was like,

these are all kind of jams. You remember Jane Fonda? That was a, that was a banger for a while. Vagely, play it. I had a baby named Jane. She could shake that thing. Said her daddy used to hang with Johnny Coatrain. She sang a sole train with a friend named Jen.

Her booty was bigger than a Mercedes Ben. Jen was a herty, girty, dirty, dirty. little girly. I heard it from a birdie she could cook a mean turkey with gravy. Baby, baby, baby was Jen's best friend and maybe. If you were lucky, Mickey Mickey. More junk in the trunk than a Honda. I know you want to do the Jane Fonda. One, two, three, four, get your booty on the dance floor. Work it out. Shake your little mama. Let me see you do the Jane Fonda. Five, six. So that's a unique way to work it out

Work your little mama I know you want to do the Jane Kondo So that was fun A unique way to make a dance song That's easy going with a fun little guitar rift About an 80s icon who ended up marrying the owner of the Turner Network So I 100% could see why he was like He was here and then he left Yeah, yeah, okay, so you didn't let me finish my story.

Or I threw it to the song. It wasn't you. It was me. But yeah, it goes along with it. So the thing is, it's cool when you're like right there and the stage is right here. Like he was literally like five feet away from me. You're like, oh, he's performing these songs I know. Mickey Evalon.

He's hard to get into when you're watching him perform because I don't know if you've ever seen. Never seen it? He's really fucking gay. And I don't mean. Like it's like just his movements It's not like he's like the whole time First of all he never has a fucking shirt on So he's always kind of like not wearing a shirt

And he's just kind of always moving like He's like grinding and like no It's literally That sounds sexy It's like he's trying to be sexy But it's just coming off as like Sleazy and like I don't I don't think you're nailing it like you think you are

It's just kind of weird and he does it the whole time. And it's also kind of like, also like me. Sounds like me every time I'm banging. It's also a little bit like, I think put your shirt on maybe. I don't think he. The shirt off.

The shirt off isn't working. It's not, it's not like, sometimes you just got to know if you got like, I perform on my shirt off all the time, body and he's just, yeah, he's just kind of like, you just ain't got it.

And also combined with the way he dances. Uh, yeah, I'm going to say I kind of get why he, came and left. I think he struck old with that song right there. The Jane Fonda one is really what put him on the map. That's what got him. And then I think my dick

one was a good fucking follow-up. Like held him in there. Yeah. And he got Andre Legacy and Dirt McNasty. Jump on it. And it was funny and it definitely has legs and lives on to this day because we're still fucking dissecting it. Throwing sound bite grades on it.

Did you see any in there by the way that's worth bringing up? I saw it my dick does yoga your dick fruit roll-up aren't fruit roll-ups like extraordinarily long no no they're like 20 feet if you like unroll no fruit roll-ups only like a foot long I'm thinking of fruit by the foot yeah yeah is that commonly common mistake I used to always confuse those too fruit ruleups were like they have have little carved out pictures that you couldn't even tell what they were they probably spent way too much time trying to figure out designs of that none of us can tell what the fuck you take it out we shove that shit in our mouth and like one

None of us were like, oh, I think it's Mickey Mouse right there. I don't know. That's Launchpad McQuack. My Dick, Great A Beef, Yo Dick, Made a Geek. We're still doing sound effects here? Yeah, I can. Give me just a lame one for that one. Give that one up, you know.

Yeah. And then the last one, My Dick, Nuff said. Yo dick loves Fred. He dropped the mic on that one. That one goes on too long. That's how they ended it. That's the end of it. Wow, they could end.

Well, then they go back to it's time and let the world know, dude. You got to let your girl know. DS is the best in the business. We got dicks like Jesus, which I have to say is a, ooh. I don't know why that's good, man. Jesus had good dick, man. Jesus had a good dick, even though he apparently didn't use it because he was a virgin, I think. And then he was also, you didn't know where he was in his 20s because he disappeared.

and then you why is that there's like a whole because he went to egypt to study and then he maybe he was off using his dick i've been using his dick might have been using his dick might have it now we're getting sacrilegious now we shouldn't do it why can't we talk about jesus like a person ever okay yeah because he wasn't he was a whole thing it's a whole thing more than that he was our savior he was a person at one point though i don't want to talk about it yeah you're you're making it weird Slaps and snaps about dick. We're doing a song that says P.S. We got dicks like Jesus.

About my dick. Slaps and snaps about my dick. You gave it a fiver? Oh, yeah. You gave it five? You asked me to give slaps about my dick. Oh. You give it yourself?

That's what I did. You gave your dick a five slapper? I did what I did. Want me to rate this song? You want me to rate the song? Yes. By Frankie Amvalon or Mickey Avalon. My dick.

Slaps and snaps I just didn't I think that I was about to do Or I'm back I'm back Now the reason I gave it a four Four and not a five

Is because this song Reminds me of my dick I've said Yo dick Loves Fred All right My dick's a four out of five Just like this song

Small fries Small five What do you got? What do you got? My ranking for Mickey Avalon of my dick. Yeah, I love that. Ooh.

Yeah, it says it all. I love that this song exists. It was hilarious at the time. I remember loving it when I first heard it. I think I remember hearing it in Harold and Kumar, which was one of our favorite movies in college. And it was just like, you know, the beat, we haven't talked about the beat enough.

The beat is so basic, but all it needs to be and, like, it works. You know, like, it's literally... It's just hard enough. Talk about a repetitive beat that just, like, only... That's all it needs to be. That's like a whole song. I love the idea of these guys. come together hey guys let's make a whole song about how my dicks the shit but yo

dicks like a little kid and that's gonna be the whole premise we don't even need to say anything else that's it except talking about our dicks being like jesus and we gotta make sure we add that and like 20 years later these guys are gonna dissect it give sound effects to rake it and d s is the best in the business because p s we got dick like jesus nix