Distractible - Bob Doesn't Know

Episode Date: August 22, 2022

Instead of dual hosting, Mark and Wade compete in a secret game of their own, leaving Bob in the dark. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Good evening, gentle listener, and welcome to Distractible, a Wood Elf production. This week, Bob goes solo, but is the target of a cunning game within the game. The gents discuss their understanding of Europe, covering Michelangelo, Da Vinci, Italy, and especially, witchcraft being ended by being stoned. Yes, it's time for Bob Doesn't Know. Yes, it's time for Bob Doesn't Know. Now sit back and prepare to be random. Random hosting. Well, we're hosting, which is random as it is. We're both hosting.

So we decided that instead of letting Bob even have a remote chance of participating in this, we're going to have a little competition in between ourselves. Indeedy-do. We're taking Wade's secret words and we're blowing it up to epic proportions. Yes. Not only do we have secret words that we're competing against each other to get bob to say but also we have random topics that we're going to be picking we have to keep the conversation to those topics if at any moment that the other person is not getting the

topic of conversation in the topic they can blow the whistle and reset everything anybody's game anybody can win everybody can lose especially bob what he gets for not picking a winner yeah that's what he gets people nerd anyway the first topic of conversation is cruise ships. Are you okay with that one? Perfect. Cruise ships. And then I'm rolling my random word. Hardware.

My word, qualification. Great. Can't wait to see how this goes. All right. Well, let's get over to bob hey bob hey hey guys no intro huh welcome to distractible welcome everybody to distractible the game where stuff happens and people get points and then they win uh the world's first distractible double hosting that's not true we'll call it the first. First time. We hosted before, Mark.

Why do I have no memory of the first time happening? I honestly don't remember it either, but I know that that happened. I don't either. Is it a Mandela effect? Was it real? Did one of us? I have no idea. I thought that I declared you both the winner at one point.

I'm pretty sure that that happened. Yeah. Very strange. I don't have any memory of it. Let us know in the Reddit, guys. Let us know. We don't remember. But either way, we decided to chill out this episode and just boil it down to some nice

topics of conversation you know kind of like in anything goes we did an episode like that you know no one roast us for doing the same thing uh but we felt like it was it would be nice just to boil it down and have a chit chat i'd like to talk about how we're getting older well no you can do that next time you host okay good i will i'll keep that in the chamber that's a good topic seems like a great one for you i feel like i really want to do that one at least three or four times well you gotta get your numbers up those rookie numbers i'm just getting started so wait till i launch my own podcast about how we're getting older. Wow. Every episode. I'd really love it if you had like a horrible appliance delivery and like we could hear

a whole episode about that. I've been considering buying more appliances just to generate content for this podcast. Oh man, we would really appreciate that. Numbers are down. Maybe they're up. I actually don't know, but I'm going to say they're down. Yeah, I was going to say, you don't check the numbers. You have no idea.

Well, how have you been, Bob? Since we're both hosting, we can only care about your small talk. The host doesn't get to have a small talk. I don't recall that being a rule, but I'm great. I'm good. Great. My parents are visiting. They're retired and they have an RV and they drive across the country and they made it

all the way from Ohio out to California. So they've been on the road for like a couple months now and they're visiting so that's fun that's good and it's been really nice out the weather's been really perfect it's been nice to be outside a little bit that is pretty cool yeah any more small talk um i reorganized the closet in my room i got some of those cloth storage bins the one foot by one foot bins on Amazon, Amazon Basics. And then I just put this stuff that was just on the shelf in those and then put those on the shelf. Did you have to use some tools to assemble those or did it like, you know?

It kind of just unfolded. What do you, what? What's up? You okay, Whit? Now, now, now. Interrupting my small talk. This is riveting small talk i did uh i needed to make sure we were in the present i got really confused whether we were in the past the future or the

present so you just walk around your house now now now past past past past now now now future future future once in a while i just have to make sure i know where i'm at and when i'm at and now now now is when i am no no no no so if you ever walked up to me and you're just like then then then that's a problem that's a bad situation yeah you know that's not present me past me's come back to haunt us you push the person you're shouting at into the past then then then then you gotta go back bob you gotta go back to go weird like a weird witchcraft thing then then they're getting younger like what is happening i'm uniquely in the position of deciding when people belong i've always been told i have a correctly aged soul i was born in the right decade you know that you were that you were anyway speaking of decades

specifically the word deck that's a good segue to our first topic right uh-huh good yeah i know what a segue we're professionals at this is this scripted no it's a free-form topic of conversation yeah we're talking about pretty much anything oh okay we just i i then then then mark and i are now now now ready to uh talk about the same thing we just have the same idea and that is that's your cue that you were supposed to finish what am i supposed to finish that yeah we're the same way right remember cruise ships that's the name of the episode we're talking about cruise ships today i've been on a few cruises actually i'm pretty i'm pretty lucky oh that's great that's great do you just want to

roll right into it do you think it's better to talk about cruise ships if you've actually been on one i mean it's probably easier to talk about cruise ships if you've actually been on a cruise but everyone has seen like pictures and stuff i'm i'm sure you can imagine it's kind of like if you're on a big boat it's just really big man how big does it get i don't even know how you'd build that like what kind of tools you'd use i i think there's a lot of welding mark i don't know welding rivets welding who knows on who can build that like a cruise ship has to have some pretty specific regulations you have to have a certain uh what's the word i'm looking for uh like degree or something to be able to do it you have to be an engineer i guess that's one of the

um things yeah requirements oh man you know decks uh like you said deck that remind me when i i used to build decks when i was in high school like i had um and you know recently i was working with a corridor crew to redo their workshop um but the the tragedy was all their tools were strewn about everywhere you know they didn't have one designated place for all the various tools right bob i don't see how that relates to cruise ships i don't either anyway i don't think he has the the requirements to talk about cruise or uh what's the word not requirement do you guys want to hear about the cruises i've been yeah i'm jealous about them i will say cruising is not the best sort of vacation if you're trying to like experience a place if you want to see like a city or a region because you really dip in and out for

like a day like less than a day sometimes but if you want to see somewhere like alaska was really cool because there's a lot of like scenery and you can see a lot of like coastal glaciers and stuff and yeah it's really pretty yeah there's a difference of like scenery and you can see a lot of like coastal glaciers and stuff and yeah it's really pretty yeah there's a difference between like seeing it on computers which is like equivalent to software um versus like the opposite hardware yeah exactly hardware yep okay anyway that's enough cruise ship talk for today yeah i agree i agree i think we're done with that that was a good conversation uh i'm gonna award some points uh okay i'm gonna award some points i had i had better stories if you i don't know how many points i got but i i didn't even is anyone competing with

me or do i just win anyway do i win we're just interested in hearing your opinion we want to hear your opinions okay yeah just everything you know we want to hear that's so ominous cruise ships are great they really are and i'm so glad you've been on them i've never been on one but that's fine but you know where we have all probably been supermarkets oh yeah yeah yeah yeah sure sure okay my word offense or offense my word triangle nothing quite like a good old supermarket or am i right yeah yep i love i've actually been talking about this with my parents lately i heard a thing i live in i live in the bay area right so i live in california we have california's stores up here and around us the nice grocery store is like safeway oh yeah it's like a nice place it's pretty cool and i've always thought that that was like the nicest of the

normal grocery stores because like whole foods has fancy stuff you don't want to buy normal groceries at whole foods because that's weird no no, no, no, no. That'd be super weird. But I heard someone in public who was like, oh, we got to go to Safeway. Trash. Safeway is the worst grocery store. And I was like, what even is around here? Yeah. In the city we live in, there's like three Safeways and maybe one lucky California. That's really not very nice.

Yeah. Anyway, I think that's weird that there's like good grocery stores and bad grocery stores because I feel like that is a thing. It definitely is a thing. That definitely is a thing. I think sometimes when I think of like the grocery stores in the Cincinnati area,

well, it's not really a supermarket or a grocery store in general, but you remember the Tri-County Mall? Yeah, sure. Yeah. I watched a documentary about that. I always wondered why it was called the Tri-County Mall. Is this because there was like three of them or something like that?

Or like there were three counties split up at that one point? It was at like the intersection of three counties, right? Yeah, yeah. Near it. Yeah, I always thought it was like due to the shapes and the tiles on the flooring there. You know, do you ever see that? I think they had like regular tiles. Yeah, no defense, Mark, but I don't think that's really relevant.

Do you mean no offense offense yes yes i do yes i do i really do are you trying to start a thing no no defense oh my brain i was just thinking about sports i guess and i had like offense and defense on the brain yeah he always thinks about sports a lot yeah he does that he does it a lot you know but that's probably enough about supermarkets it was nice to reminisce yeah that's enough about supermarkets we got way off topic and we don't want to do that here we want to kind of like how passive-aggressive that is instead of telling them that you don't mean any offense you're like don't take offense at this but you're an ass no defense well sometimes there is no defense can try. Way weirder way to put that, I guess.

Uh-huh. Yeah. Oh, well, how about the next topic? I have an idea. Did I get points for that? I barely even... Oh, someone gets points for that. Yeah, we'll worry about that later.

Who else? Okay, that's... Don't worry. Yeah, points have been assigned. Feeling good. My word, transition. My word, shareholder. All right, so I think we should move on to special occasions.

You know, those moments in our lives. The seasons are changing. You're taking down decorations. You're putting up other ones. It's a flux state, you know. Special moments in our lives. You get all of that money coming in from relatives, and you can just invest, invest, invest.

It's not really a special occasion oh so let's okay let's keep it to the top of conversation here of course yeah i was thinking more like weddings and and holidays weddings special occasions that's the thing yeah exactly you have any moments that that are that are very special especially ones that where you where you elevate yourself from one moment of your life to another when you journey like from one position to another as of maturity in your life i mean when i got married i feel like i'm i got that was a big step yeah big step and then i got married we're adults now even though basically i feel like the same person but you just spend a lot on a wedding but you also get lots of gifts and stuff in return and man can you put that money into other things and become a

um you know a part owner of i don't know different companies and stocks and things just you know really bank they're not really pertaining to special occasions here let's let's keep it on the topic we definitely did not make money on our wedding and we did it like yes like mandy did a lot like everything for our wedding by hand she made made stuff. I helped a little bit, but I'm not very helpful. That's expensive, man. I can't imagine how expensive it is if you have a fancy, in a big ballroom or a crazy fancy destination or something. It's crazy.

Yeah, I can't imagine that either. Yeah, that would be nuts. That would be nuts. But what special occasion besides your marriage stands out in your mind? I mean, Christmas is always big for us because the whole family gets together. As we got older, you know, like smaller holidays, you didn't necessarily come home from like college for whatever. But Christmas was always one where it's like everybody comes home, everybody gets together

kind of the one time a year. Passing of the torch, changing of the guard, you know. And funny thing, getting older has so many words that rhyme with it. Like, imagine, like, being a bear and getting older. What rhymes with bear and older? Bear older. Bear and older? You know, bears love life and sleeping.

Are you thinking of the word boulder? I think he was, yeah. It was boulder. Yeah, very good. Berolder. What about when you... Special occasion. What's more special than puberty?

Puberty. Okay. When you go from a young lad to a teenage Bob, you're in a chrysalis. You're like in a cocoon. You're blooming tell them about that the blossom i mean i was definitely in middle school i don't know you're blooming you do middle school you sure did bloom back then but now you're an adult and you got to start

thinking about retirement what special occasion retirement would be oh let him speak his peace i'm blooming i'm i'm becoming a man i'm not jewish so i didn't have a bar mitzvah but like i'm blooming what what is school learning no a special occasion no special occasions talking about just telling about your special occasion the dances the dances are you talking about dances dances oh i love when they change songs. Like homecoming dances and stuff? Yeah. Dances are fantastic. Everyone loves dances. School was fine, but I don't know. My favorite part of school was like band probably because that's where all my friends were.

You ever take any like accounting classes or learn about stocks? Yeah. I mean, I went to law school. I learned about securities and I took a specifically I took some accounting classes, learned about that stuff. Not the most interesting. Are you a part owner of any businesses? I solely own my own business, technically.

Yeah, you would never hand that over to anyone. There's no something of power. I can't remember the word. A transition of power? Yeah, that's the one. You're so smart. Okay, man. You're really smart, man. You're really good. Yep, that's fantastic. You're so smart. Okay, man. You're really smart, man.

You're really good. Yep, that's fantastic. I'm really happy. Enough, enough. No more special occasions. Special occasions are annoying. Yeah, we got off topic anyway. We got off topic anyway.

Man, let's talk about, I don't know, what's popular. Famous people. My word, circul people. My word. Circulate. My word. Infection. I don't know too much about famous people. Oh, that's okay.

I just can't believe you don't know about famous people. Some people would say we're famous people. Don't you know yourself? Oh, no. I know a lot about mark oh that's me that's me well there is a lot about mark uh uh going around what's the word uh going around on the internet uh circulating oh man yeah that's it uh that's sure you know i'm getting what's that not it i can't tell if you're happy at me or mad. I'm so confused.

I'll just say, you know, we don't have to talk about me, guys. That's an uncomfortable. How about we change the topic, you know? I'd hate to just get into a topic and then prompt it oh so poorly. Let's not do that, you know? Oh, man. That'd be a sure shame if that were to happen. Uh-huh.

Well, let's just agree to make sure that these topics are not treated that way. Man, you were the topic and you're offended by it. All right, what do you want to talk about? Uh, yeah, I just, I don't want to dominate the conversation. How about desserts? Everyone loves desserts. Great. Yeah, perfect.

Good stuff. My word, aluminum. My word, express. All right, I love it. stuff my word aluminum my word express all right i love desserts man you're picking the topics why is it so funny we're not laughing oh man okay well i'm just hearing things then it's a it's distractible it's a laugh a minute you know you get you get okay lot bang for your buck anyway there's just so many funny desserts that's why we're laughing i love dessert i mean that is true you know what's a really funny dessert you guys ever had baked alaska no no it's crazy it's it's ice cream on the inside and then like cake on the outside or something and then they like light it

on fire what whoa but then when you get it it's still cold ice cream inside it's really crazy actually how do they ship that around or can you only get it there no you have to like get it at a restaurant where they make it because it's like one of those things where it's like you have to make it all real quick so the ice cream doesn't melt it's crazy yeah man if they could ship that to you real speedy that would be awesome i don't think overnight shipping is even fast enough for that i would imagine well they ship it in. Like what kind of container? Some kind of like metal can or something? Well, like a cooler with a lot of dry ice.

If it stays frozen solid, I guess maybe. But then the cake might be ruined. Well, I mean, okay, which shipping company is the fastest? You got DHL. They're probably slow, too slow for it. They wouldn't put enough dry ice in there. You know, you got UPS. DHL is slow.

Yeah, it's slow, right? VATEL is always like it's the next day or further. They're never accurate with their predictions. If only there was a shipping company that put fast in the name. UPS was a universal postal service. That's boring. It's not speedy. There isn't a shipping company that has fast in the name, is there? There may be some synonym of fast i don't know yeah that's fair you know what else is really slow what does fedex stand for i don't know you should look it up oh no no no no no while you're while you're thinking about that you should think about uh just google it uh those iron cans that they uh they put food in oh it really stands for federal express it sure does it sure does and i bet they would put dry ice in that bad boy and

they would get that baked alaska to you in a jiffy in a jiffy i guess i'm a little embarrassed i didn't know that i don't know what i thought it stood for my word execution my word conclusion i guess i always mix fedex and like fedex Kinkos together because it used to be Kinkos and then FedEx bought Kinkos and then they're all. So like it's not like even a shipping company to me anymore. I know. I know. And you know what?

Who cares about shipping anyway? Shipping is boring. Oh, okay. You know what's not boring? History. Well, specifically Europe. Let's just talk about Europe. We were there.

We did a tour in Europe. Let's talk about Europe. I know. I know several facts probably about European history, maybe. Okay. Good things? Mostly about World War II, so I'll say probably not that good. World War II, there was a lot of things that happened there.

If you don't know enough specifics, just make sure it has a good ending. You want to stick the landing, right? Sure. Sure. Yeah, you really want to finish the landing, have proper finishing of the landing right sure sure yeah you really want to uh finish the landing have proper finishing of the landing did i ever tell you guys that i didn't know how to spell the word finish correctly until i was almost in college no i think i actually did tell that story on this podcast once yes then anyway i apparently for my entire life i spelled it like as in the nationality to finish with two

ends in it and then so so like spell check never told me that was wrong and then it was like senior of high school i was working on a paper with my best friend and i had a i had that word was in it a bunch of times and he read it and was like oh these are all spelled wrong and i was like oh that's how you spell finish and he was like oh buddy that's not how you spell finish i'll bet you you wanted to have the same fate as uh marie antoinette when that happened didn't you i'm sorry you're just so ashamed and embarrassed in that moment you were like please just go ahead behead me or some other form of uh god killing what are you trying to say wade like why don't you reach the uh the ending of your statement i'm saying that when you're embarrassed sometimes you just want like someone to pull the lever cronk you know yeah you just want to like you want to escape that moment yep i wasn't that

embarrassed but I guess. It was just kind of a dumb, you know, like a whoops. What's really embarrassing is that none of my teachers who I ever turned papers into with that misspelling in it caught it either. Not a single adult human who was trained to teach children about the English language caught that mistake. That's really pure, really pure, really poor. Oh God. My brain just shut down because i misspoke letters

that's okay we can move on uh yeah no it's like all of that is just like a big it's a big con you know it's a con everyone's trying to like oh we're doing inclusion but it's a con you know it's a con i guess what's a con about that no it's just an inclusion con you know where the the witch trials did those happen in europe and the u.s or was that just u.s that was in uh that was salem oregon that's not on topic i don't know if that's true either mark well west of salem oregon it was a small town with nothing around it for a long time uh but there were lots of witches there what that's the truth yeah that's the truth that is the truth 100 weren't there witch trials in europe too i'm pretty sure there were not ones that i

learned about in american history class well yeah not in american history but you never had to take like a world history class sure did did. I'm pretty sure I... Oh, did you guys know that in Europe in 1984 was the world's first Clue convention? And it was actually a Clue Fusion convention. They had a really clever name for it. Clue Fusion? Yeah. I don't know what Clue Fusion even means.

No, it's... Are you talking about Europe here? Is that board game and subsequent movie clue exactly and it was both combined like collusion but a convention collusion con oh so i think that was the name but not quite that doesn't sound right yeah collusion con sounds great what do you think happened to all the people that were convicted of being witches, though, in Europe? They were probably stoned to death or something or burned at the stake. I don't know.

Oh, it's super sad, yeah, the way they were stoned to death. Or some other form of... I don't know. They hanged them. They probably did other stuff. Let's not jump to Sumpersons or something like that. Jump to collusion cons. Yeah, let's not jump to collusion cons yeah let's not jump to

collusion guns oh man i what was this topic europe oh history europe europe right okay let's talk about the witch trials in europe there's no witch trials in europe i really sincerely don't remember a single thing about witch trials uh between the years 1500 and 1660 80 000 suspected witches were put to death in europe interesting does it say if they were mostly like burned or hanged or beheaded or whatever uh 80 of them were women um apparently most of them were uh um life removed what's the word in germany uh in germany apparently germany had the highest uh witchcraft uh? Apparently Germany had the highest, uh, witchcraft, uh, kill rate. Maybe they had the most witches.

You ever think about that? I mean, stands to reason they must have had the most witches, I guess. That's the only, uh, that's the only answer. Yeah, I mean, I guess that's what they thought, at least. Seems pretty horrible. Anyway. Yeah. Yeah.

We haven't reached the end. This isn't the ending. There's a lot about europe we haven't touched on no nah yeah okay good um yeah i know more about stuff what's your favorite country in europe oh italy probably italy italy uh man uh lots of great art you know lots of really cool that uh what's his face like michelangelo was pretty good and uh that genius guy uh da vinci he was there he was italian and like lots other ones that i'm i know the names of i'm just not saying because i don't want to make anyone feel bad

i think at one point there was some like religious persecution in italy that's probably i mean probably that just sort of happened all over yeah and all kinds of crazy torture devices uh how oh do you know many italian words uh uh vespucci uh uh uh rigatoni i mean what would be a fancy way of saying like ending to a big occasion in italy like finito no no not that another one uh uh uh uh conclusionary no yep yep no yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep that's it i looked it up that's how you said is that is that really how you say conclusion in Italian?

It's close enough. Especially a guess. It actually, it's conclusione. It's actually literally how you say it in Italian. I'm not joking. It's conclusione. Okay. So you got that right.

I'm really proud of you, Bob. You did that and I'm very, very proud of you. I don't know if that's exactly what I... I'll take it. Why question away? I think you said that right. I'm really proud of you, Bob. You did that, and I'm very, very proud of you. I don't know if that's exactly what I... Yeah, I'll take it. Why question a win? I think you said conclusion. Points for me. Give me the points.

He sure did. All right. What points? I was just saying, you got it. What do you mean? Well, I'm assuming there's some sort of game by which you're... You seemed really satisfied with that, so I'm assuming that I won somehow or something. I'm not satisfied with that at all, to be fair.

Dude, when you reach a good conclusion,'re very very very satisfied i wish i was switching places with marie and twin at about now all right let's talk about europe europe sucks how did she die what do you die in some weird way i don't know uh yeah she fell off a bridge um anyway let's talk about coffee we know some people who have coffee my word mutation my word ministry i mean i have weird opinions about coffee too i guess but i'm really you guys are giving off a weird energy today can i say that oh man you know i feel holy great do you think if you drink coffee while you're like pregnant it could cause the baby to come out with different like um uh what superpowers or weird like extra limbs or something like too many limbs yeah i don't know i mean i know you're not supposed to

drink caffeine when you're pregnant it's bad for the baby or whatever but yeah what does it cause though what does it cause the baby to have i would assume it causes like potentially like a mutation or something it sure would i think it sure would that sounds fantastically terrible and i would never want that to happen okay that's i'm really happy about that it's just kind of inappropriate but that's fine i yeah there's just something about i don't know hearing hearing you say that that really just it makes my fears come true don't drink caffeine while pregnant everybody that's your that's your uh your advice from me of the day yeah if only there was some government department to wash over that yeah who cares we've talked enough about coffee some sort of administration let's talk about something else let's talk about something else. Let's talk about swimming. Oh, okay.

My word, rescue. My word, legend. Damn it! Oh, man. What's happening? Swimming is just so fun. Dude, I love swimming. Mom, quick question. What do lifeguards

do? They watch you swim they sure do they're creepy aren't they what what if you're drowning they jump into the pool yeah and then what ones that save you become real and they rescue you yes they do yes they do nothing not a damn thing yes they, they do. They rescue you. Well, I won that one quick, huh? Yeah. I'm figuring this game out. Yeah, that was a lightning round. A lightning round.

A lightning round. You're really building up the points. Oh, hell yeah. You're really building up the points. My word, desire. My word, column. All right, well, screw swimming. Oh, okay.

Yeah, it's about birthdays. Okay, we all have birthdays. Did you know that in Korea, they don't celebrate birthdays just on the day that you were born? Everyone celebrates at the end of the year. Oh, really? It's like you're all stacked in a certain category and you're just like, boom, you're a year older. Line up, get in file. Kind of a cool idea, boom you're a year older line up get in file kind of a cool idea but that's a lot of people all have birthdays all at once i know the best

thing about birthdays is you kind of get what you want you get the things that you crave uh the things that you um covet uh things that you um things you desire what is there you're getting at what were you about to say what was i I about to say? No, Bob. Desire? Yeah, things you desire. Exactly that. Exactly that. Okay. That's not how I feel about my birthday, but that's fine. Like our next topic, things you might desire that are taking place, I don't know, maybe

out of this world, like in space, for example. Yeah, in space. My word, question. My word, outside. The topic is things that happen in space? Yeah, exactly. I mean, it's like the ponderations of looking up at the stars. The feeling of questing that you see in your soul when you look above you know

where do you go to look at the stars you can't see them from inside the house well i mean you go to an observatory of course you go to an observatory yeah of course absolutely you go to an observatory that's pretty fun ex planetariums are good too because the better part is you can uh you have experts there and you can go up and you start talking to them all of this in in a planetarium in with the experts when you could just be uh i don't know not in well i said you could go out in the yard yeah you could be out yeah you could go out you could go out but when you need to go into the planetarium and you need to like seek answers like bob do you have any experience with that seeking answers in the planetarium yeah i mean the ones

i've been to is more like a pre-recorded show like it starts in the cameras like in the planetarium and then it zooms outside or something and you're like yes it sure does okay well i wasn't done but that's fine oh god i love being outside what did i even excuse you it's not your topic of conversation i just want to say it's my turn. That's fair. My word is tycoon. My word? Advance. Wow.

All right. What do you want to talk about? I think comic books. Bob, were you a comic book guy? Did you have a kingdom of comic books? You were the domino of comic books wasn't the kingdom of comic books you're the the domino of comic books the kingpin of comic books that's me the kingpin of comics you're going comic crazy no i did i never really got that into comic books i appreciate them more now but i've i'm lazy i

just rather watch tv or whatever they were expensive as a kid it was hard to get a bunch of comic books like i don't know when you didn't have a lot of money to try to collect them all that was tough like maybe if you got some money ahead of time like you got in uh uh money well uh wade just can't think of the words that he needs to think so i think we should just move on to the next topic conversation when i got comic books as a kid it was uh spider-man i got spider-man sure i remember also you know it was the same era i was playing a lot of like crazy games about roller coasters and theme parks and stuff like that but you know that era all blends together right never that bring any memories of the memory jar like roller coaster tycoon yep i do that is the one i mean you like spider-man yeah spider-man's good cool good all right i'm satisfied

superhero or anything buddy no i'm satisfied i don't want to hear any more about it spider-man's great and you just landed him we should talk about something else i'm satisfied my word vertical my word complain i'm gonna do a favor i guess for uh mark here we're gonna talk about uh something he's more familiar with let's talk about sports he has a whole podcast about sports my favorite sports team you know i do i do bob i'll give you a bonus point if you've listened if you've listened to go my favorite sports team uh yeah i've listened to go i listened to the most recent one i listened to is the non-competitive sports one where you talked about marching band and cheerleading and stuff i thought that was interesting go on it's just a complicated thing and the the ultimate

conclusion that you guys landed on uh spoilers you talked a lot about how it's like the issue of if marching band is a sport because i did marching band and i i would say for me personally it does seem like a sport it's very competitive you're both competing against yourself to get better at music at the performance both physical and like, you know, artistic, but also you compete against other bands. My band would do, I don't know, probably half a dozen or more competitions over the course of a season.

But you guys ultimately were like, it doesn't really matter if it is a sport or isn't a sport. It's kind of a personal classification. I think it is important that it is a sport though, because marching band is something that enriches kids' lives and it deserves the respect in terms of institutional respect from the school and the district as a

sport for funding purposes, as well as for like, I don't know, for like standing purposes, because the band program and the arts programs in general get denigrated a lot, right? If you get a big budget cut, the first thing that's going to get cut is the arts, usually includes orchestra and band and it frequently means that oh we can't do marching band anymore because we don't have the money for it or oh we can't feel you know now we can't have flag corps members which is a big part of marching band that makes it look you know more exciting and interesting and like part of that is because oh it's not a sport it's just the arts but i think it's important for things that are sort of on the fringe if it was a sport if it was funded by the athletic boosters or funded by the district in the same way that

football basketball the big popular sports are it would enrich the experience for the hundreds of kids in each district thousands of kids depending on how big your district is who are in the music programs who might be in marching band or might otherwise be performing. And like sitting on stage performing music is not a sport. Clearly that's an art, but marching band being a sport just buys more legitimacy for it. And I felt like that was a really important thing that you sort of in Tyler's conclusion, sort of he dismissed because he was like, oh, it's not a sport. It's not very competitive, but I would say it arguably is. And that there's importance beyond the definition of a sport and why it should or should not be a sport that i think that's an important thing about it that's just my opinion i don't know if that's right but i thought that was a very interesting topic i always find it

weird that people whine and moan about like what is or isn't a sport because like even on esp and things like world series of poker and stuff would play and it's like okay well if that's on there what isn't like i guess the difference between competition and the sport is kind of lost on me but there's a lot of great discussion about that especially in that episode the non-competitive sports episode of go my favorite sports team yeah and in like some of the primer episodes and stuff that's a whole other podcast that we don't have to delve into i just thought it was interesting yeah but what about how high they jump in band yeah what about how high they jump they jump a little bit probably not super. How can they be a sport if there's no testing for their jump height?

Your jump matters more in basketball, but in basketball, the first thing I think about is how much people moan and groan and whine and whatever to the refs. Like, oh, this was a foul. This was a foul. And then they don't get the call to go their way and they just keep going. I always think that's silly. All sports do that, but some like soccer, especially like European soccer, they're so bad about that.

About what? Moaning about everything that happens to the ref. Yeah. Just like crying or taking a dive and then being like, what? He didn't touch you and you fell down. What do you want? Then after the game, they're just sitting there at their press conferences, like talking about like the ref's call, the lack of a call.

And they're uh making excuses really yeah yeah yeah if only they jumped higher i'd be jumping higher certainly might avoid getting fouled i guess i if that's what you're getting at mark yeah i think there's a correlation what do you do if you jump high you get fouled and like the ref doesn't see it what do you do to him you jump higher same thing you complain i guess oh you sure do you sure do god it helps a lot i'm sorry did i say the wrong thing no you said exactly the right thing that's what people do why do you sound so sad i just think you're dismissing the jumping conclusion what about the jumping yeah what about the jump well i'm just saying if if uh if you know

marching band people jump more they you know they'd be better well might lose more teeth we spent a lot of time on this topic it was a good topic but i think it's time to move on okay i i do i i think that uh you go listen to my favorite go my favorite sports team if you guys want to listen to more about go listen to my favorite sporting events. Whatever the hell that podcast is called. Go listen to my favorite sports team. My word, virus. My word, helpless. Wait.

Wait. Are you guys in the same room or something what's happening we are very allergic to whatever just yeah it's it's oh man all right great anyway all right i think you you know, we never approached this topic of conversation on this podcast very much. But I think now is a better time than any. Is it? Politicians. Hate them.

All politicians bad. Let's move on. They're like a plague, right? They're like rats. A disease. Sure. Right? Yeah, generally, sure.

You can't help but feel like a certain way about what's going on in the world because it doesn't feel like they like take care of us right just that feeling of um not being able to take care of yourself yeah i remember feeling that when it was during the uh the the covid bacteria pandemic isn't it the covid bacteria it doesn't matter it doesn't matter listen no it's a viral infection mark really is it yeah yeah that's right that's right thank you bob yeah the covet 19 is a virus i'm pretty sure oh you're right it is it really is oh man i was wrong i said it was a bacterium are you punking me what is that sometimes i feel pretty much like people can't help take care of me here oh no no you're not helpless wade this is probably a bit too spicy for our podcast we

try to keep things pretty chill let's talk about something else yeah yeah let's uh let's pull things off a little bit and talk about the season specifically winter i love winter it's gonna get cold fast i I love winter. It is my favorite season. What is happening? My word is foreigner. My word? Eyebrow. Am I just like winning so much right now that you guys can't believe it?

Oh, God. Well, you're certainly not losing. When you talk, it's so engaging and fascinating. It's not, but okay. It's just like when I step inside your world, I'm just, I'm a visitor. I'm immigrating into your domain. I don't like that. That's creepy.

I feel like Bob is going to raise an eyelash looking at you right now. I think that he has lovely eyelashes and I love the way they look. More than one eyelash even. I'm going to raise many of them, Wade. Just you wait. That you wait that's good that's good that's great he's got those exotic looks to him you know i don't know about that and two fuzzy little caterpillars above his eyes look at those little babies each one unique and special winter am i right oh winter's really cool it's cold which i like because i'm really hot generally i'm very i'm a very sweaty person so i wear shorts a lot in winter i do i like it to be cold you prefer the cold and i've heard so many people moan about like oh you don't like winter

usually wearing cozy clothes and blanket no the hell i do not you will never see me in more than a light jacket unless it's like a blizzard or we're in antarctica you literally laid on our bus when we were traveling doing the tour with the window broken like freezing air like hitting you and you were fine that was the best you were so comfortable we were driving through the midwest in january and it was like 20 degrees out we were going highway speeds so i had just 20 degree air blowing up my ass it was my favorite the best sleep i ever got best sleep you ever got with ice and all of your different facial hair i didn't have facial hair yeah we had our passports you have hair on your face well eyebrows i guess yeah i i have eyebrows still. I don't have any other facial hair. Yeah. Do he?

He does. Do he? He does. Yes, I do. What's up? Let me check. Yeah, I have eyebrows. There you go.

Double check. Great. That's good enough for me. Is that good enough for you? Apparently it is. Apparently it is. And that means it's good enough for me. My word is content.

My word was also content. What? Huh? No way! What's so funny? Oh, nothing, nothing. I just love what we do, making videos on the internet. It's just nice that Mark and I agree and work together on things.

Yeah, we're video creators. You know, we're pioneers. Of history. We're part of history now. Yeah. We are part of history. We're part of history. That's pretty grandiose.

I don't know about that. People will look back to watch all of our continents one day, and they will be like, wow, look what they made. All of your what? Continents? Nah. What? No, not not that do you mean content we sure do we sure do don't wait mark are you okay what the fuck is happening man what the goddamn what is what you're having a stroke and then when i correct you you've loosened your shit no no i'm happy mark are you happy maybe maybe just don't correct him don't correct him you know you shouldn't correct

him and anything i won't then i won't correct anyone anymore anybody anymore during this episode hey for once he and i are both in agreement that we are really happy that you are happy with our content. Yeah. I feel at peace inside my soul. Okay, good. Kind of like the next thing we should talk about, which is, man, that fluttering sensation we feel inside right now where we are just flying. Yeah. I mean, we all have flown before.

It's flying. Flying. Flying is the topic. My word is training. word alcohol have you what when you think of flying what's the first thing that comes in your mind uh being uncomfortable oh no i'm fat so how do you get comfortable like if you're sitting in first class what can you do to get comfortable no such thing i have flown first class there is no such thing as being comfortable on an airplane for me i'm both too tall and too big around i am always uncomfortable and no one else on the airplane ever seems to give a single shit about anything people take their shoes off and put their stinky feet on stuff people just make noise people talk loudly people let their

kids scream. That's more of a joke. I don't hold that against you parents. But it is annoying. Kids, if you're ever on an airplane, just chill out for like a few hours. Stop screaming. Stop kicking things. It's all right, man.

We're cool. It's all right. You know, it's almost enough is to make one want to abandon planes altogether and go about uh on rails there was a better way to travel than airplanes i would but trains boats all of it is garbage in this country yeah i know right uh i mean go on mark nah uh uh-huh. You were agreeing with me, sir? Yes, I was. Because I think that trains are an underappreciated thing in today's society. You know what you can do on a train and on an airplane to help the experience be better for both?

Work out. Fart. Just spite everyone around you. Or drink a little bit of, you know what I'm saying a little bit of beer beer is one option I like singing I like dancing I like riding

on the train one could say I think Mark is going insane and I'm not going to correct him. I would agree. What is happening? Why are you singing?

What is that? Did you know there's an incorporated company about trains? An incorporated company about trains. Yeah. No, there is definitely not. We should move on immediately. I don't even know. Are you talking about Amtrak?

No, no, no. He probably is. It's much simpler. They got the. I don't even know. Are you talking about Amtrak? No, no, no, no, no, no. It's much simpler. They got the website domain early, you know. Trains.com? Is it trains, trains, trains? You're so close, but we should talk about planes. It's about flying. The topic is flying.

Right, flying. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I got off topic. Well, it's kind of about how much I hate flying. Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. Just get you a nice liquor or beer or other type of drinky drink. And I pretty much would only do beer or like a whiskey and Diet Coke.

Yeah. As opposed to other types of what? Like what's the alternative? I don't even know of drinks. I don't know. They have all kinds of stuff. Well, I mean, what if instead of being on a plane, you were able to just flap your arms really hard?

Like I was a bird? Yeah, I think with enough practice. There's got to be like a special program. Your alternate form of transportation suggestion is become a bird? Well, not right away. Not for everybody. You know, there's got to be some practice beforehand. Yeah, but if you end up getting hurt while practicing for something like that

and you get like a scrape, what are you going to do? You got to put some rubbing stuff on you. You put some Neosporin on it, yeah. Yeah, Neosporin helps reduce scarring. Everyone knows this. Rubbing. What were you talking about? Rubbing stuff?

Hydrogen peroxide? That stuff that foams up? No, well, it's like not the drinkable version of like liquors and stuff, but like the, it's got that really strong smell. It's clear. You put it like on the little fuzziesies you don't put rubbing alcohol on a cut oh right you are right you are that's a terrible idea good call good call oh man mark don't react like that to anything i ever say again what is happening he's very right mark you shouldn't put rubbing alcohol on a cut

that was he's right yeah he's right he's right he's right he's very right mark you shouldn't throw me alcohol in a cut that was he's right yeah he's right he's right he's right he's right my word calendar my word highway am i winning can i get a points check how many points do i have oh so many uh you have i can't count them there's so many i mean i guess i'm not competing against anyone but it'd be nice if you it can't be that many that you can't count that high no no it's not but you know flying is not as ubiquitous as i would say driving in north america like north america really is all about car culture and i think that like it's it's good to probably finish this off with a topic about North America. Oh, okay.

Including Canada. That's fine and all, but you can't drive around all times of the year. You know, you really got to pay attention to that thing that shows the different months. Actually, you can. You can. How can you not drive around at all times of the year? Unless you live somewhere where- Bad weather. Just, you know, rainy storms, mudslides, horrible things.

That's why it's really important to pay attention to the best times of year huge budget is allocated towards road maintenance like and there was a huge project that was initiated way back in the early 1900s that built infrastructure for all of this that's true yeah it's very true are you talking about the interstate project uh yes i am technically speaking that was very much it's funny because we don't know a world without interstates, but that basically changed the face of the entire country. It went from being state routes and two-lane roads that didn't really connect to literal huge highways that are connecting everything. No, it didn't.

It didn't. It did. It did actually, Wade. It did. Sorry, Wade. It did. Have you seen the highways? didn't it didn't it did it did actually wait it did sorry wade it did though there uh have you seen the highways i'm you're familiar with 70 71 75 yep and i think uh what forget it north america we we one more thing we should talk about oh no no no we should talk about anything else uh based on my calculations we probably should i don't i think we're out of time bob you gotta be tired you know people were saying on the subreddit

that they they like the longer episodes so i mean we don't have to do it but you could say screw you to the people who were like oh i like this it's longer it's fun uh but they you know people were like oh i'd listen to two hour long episodes well then let's get one more great all right okay all right let's talk about something we all know and love and are part of a lot and that's the internet all right hey we're all part of the internet my word operational my word pollution we are part of the internet are you embarrassed about your internet presence wade are you ashamed of what you've done sometimes sometimes sometimes i feel like i'm just not functioning at maximum capacity like i'm shut down you know yeah it's like the tubes are clogged with smog you know

you hate it you know when you go outside and you just like can't even breathe that's what it feels like on the internet these days. There's just this fog or this cloud. I love your analog intuition about the internet, Mark. I try to break it down so people can understand it at home. Is this hackers? Are you hacking the mainframe right now by flying through it in your internet spaceship? Yeah.

Side note, Bob, did you see Darkiplier vs. Antisepticate? That video I made? I saw it way a long time ago when it came out once. yeah uh side note bob did you see darkiplier versus the antiseptic uh that video like i saw it way a long time ago when it came out once do you remember what logan paul's character was i really don't you don't damn it uh do you remember star wars remember palpatine no there like you can see this on the internet you can look this up if you don't remember when palpatine's sitting there like our weapons are fully working now no no look up this is star wars is the old news this is really topical because the internet not when did dark applier come out dark applier for xanadiceptica you should go to

uh recording right now you can watch it after yeah you can watch what i talked about no here look at uh timestamp 329 i'm looking at the fan wiki right now to learn about dark plier versus antiseptic guy yeah look up all the crazy characters that were part of it i'm so glad about the the wikis that people make what if you looked up anything else this came out in 2017 that's not relevant what do you mean the internet is always relevant the internet's old man i would agree that is not relevant you know what came out more recently star wars look at look at logan's character it's so funny logan how palatian no most no you're mispronouncing it what is that supposed to be i get that it's like a dark name i think it's uh logan pollen i mean i have i i've commiserated some kind of flowery seed or

something i don't know is it supposed to be logan pollution yes there was a play on words to be logan pollution isn't that great but i mean i guess that's how you pronounce it but that's every thrust of his hips logan pollution. All right. Enough about this. What if we just have two more topics real quick? Two more. No, I think we're out of time. I can't believe this is how I go down. Bob, good job. You win or something.

Thanks. Okay. All right. It's time to come clean. Do I? How? How? Why do I win?

I win. Is that it? Are we actually done? Well, we are done. I is that it are we actually done well we are done i mean yeah we're done we're done okay that's ominous we are done what do i find out how many points i earned i'm tabulating the points here and i'm thinking i've got this right if okay so uh in in second place is wade with nine points i thinking. How is there second place but not third place? There is a third place. There is a third place.

There is a third place. Oh, okay. And second place, Wade with nine points. Third place, Bob with zero points. You said you'd give me a bonus point if I did something. Sorry, one point then. One point. Excellent.

Also, you always reacted like I got a bunch of stuff. Yeah, you did. You did get a bunch of stuff, but they weren't for you. They were for us. They were for us, yeah. What? And then in first place is me with 10 beautiful points. Yeah.

Well done, Bob. You can't. You're the host. This podcast is not fully operational. Uh-huh. No, literally. Okay. I know we've done shenanigans before but literally how could i

have earned points i earned one bonus point what did i fail at to fail at earning points how could i have won this well maybe if you'd given me more points i could have just declared you the winner because i would have won well okay bob let's let's let's be fair about this you didn't have any the rules didn't have any subsections to allow you to gain points. That doesn't make any sense. Well, we're the hosts and we decided it. Here's what we did, Bob. You host.

You said it. You're the host. You remember how we recycle old ideas all the time? Now you're going to take jabs at me? Yes. Getting older. We sure are. Well, I'm not.

Classy. I'm upset at you, Bob, because you got more of Mark's words than mine, so, uh. Maybe if you had made it fair. Well, it was for us. It just wasn't for you. Oh, yeah. Very fair. In fact, it was so fair that it was ten to nine. It was very close. It was very close, yeah. It was very close. Except for you. You are nowhere near winning.

Anyway, so we had random words and random topics, and you said the words. And whoever's word you said first was won. Each of us had a word. We had to get you to say our word. I sort of figured that was the game, but I thought I was winning by getting to the words

that you were trying to get me to say. Well, you got to the wrong words, so no, I'm glad you lost. Yeah, right words, actually. You said there was no way I could have won. Well, yeah, but my words were better words, and maybe I would have made you the winner if I didn't feel like hosting the next one. I would have had that power, but now I'm going to give it to it to mark so i don't feel bad i don't even remotely believe you you made this unfair dumb broken ass thing we

made this unfair you are the hosts you two are responsible for what just transpired i'm proud of it you declared us the winners so technically this is your fault yeah that's that's true yeah uh somebody declared me the winner previously so technically it is your fault. Yeah, that's true. Somebody declared me the winner previously, so technically it's their fault. Who hosted the first one of these? Mark hosted the first one of these. No, Wade did. That's not important. But Wade hosted the first one of these. That doesn't matter right now. What matters is that we're all here together. All of this is Wade's

fault. Yeah, actually. I look forward to your comments. Thank you everybody so much. As the winner, I'll make my winner speech the outro here. We really appreciate you listening. We have a YouTube channel with highlights and beautiful thumbnails and merch store. You can find Wade and Bob, Minion777 and Bob Micecrum.

Bob, do you have a loser speech? I'm not even the loser because it turns out I didn't even compete. You still lost harder than me. Wade's the loser. I was just a participant. All right, Wade, you... Give me my participant trophy, and I'll leave.

All right, here, take it. Yeah, okay. Thanks for listening, everybody, and I'm glad I at least placed ahead of Bob today. That only works on me. I wasn't even doing a voice. I was grunting. Being the best loser is still better than being the worst loser.

Well, thank you everybody for listening. I look forward to us recycling this idea in six months' time. Podcast oust. Podcast oust.