Distractible - Distractible Travel Guide: Cincinnati

Episode Date: April 4, 2025

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The Ford It's a Big Deal event. Visit your Toronto area Ford store or Ford.ca today. Good evening, gentle listener, and welcome to Destructible. This episode, bumbling Bob builds his March Madness and the terrific triad, Trade Tour Tips. Wishing Wade stocks up on Scout Snacks, parades Babel Coasters, Crackers, Ballers and Ass Chilly.

Monstrous Mark the Render Ranger gets railed by the Power People. Misty's Tyler favors Phantoms and rags La Rosas, from Sartorial satisfaction to plush parks. Yeah. It's time for Distractable Travel Guide, Cincinnati.

Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show. Hello and welcome back to, for some reason, another episode of Distractible. Couldn't tell you why, it just keeps happening. My name is Bob, I'll be your host for today. I'm the host because I won the last one and the way this works is, the host is the winner.

Oh, and the winners for this one are gonna be either Mark or Wade, because that's the other part of how this works. Others in the host is the winner, like laying the foundation for you to win. I win because I'm the winner. Oh and the winners for this one are gonna be either Mark or Wade. Because that's the other part of how this works. Others in the host is the winner like laying the foundation for you to win. I win because I'm the host. I'm the host because I win. I host this one. I win this one. I host the next one. I'm the host forever because all I do is win win win and so on. What a tautology. Can I comment on something? The listeners are going to weep because I'm gonna mention another visual thing but our shirt color combination is just very pleasant

Hmm. It's very striking. It's more colorful than we usually are and yet they match up quite nicely I think that this is going to be maybe our best episode ever because of that We have like a red Scott as well as an aqua and then a a burnt orange. It's almost a traffic light blue means go everyone knows that It's more it's green to me. I said almost I'm not yellow Obviously blue almost means go everyone knows that editors turn us into a traffic light. It's good to be back on top boy Perfect I do have to agree with you mark. I like the colors of our shirts. I'm just gonna throw this out there. This is accidentally day three of this shirt. James was up in the middle of the night last night so I didn't go to bed till four o'clock. Accidentally

slept in, had to go get the dog's medicine, didn't end up getting the dog's medicine, still wearing the same shirt. Life is going really well over here for me. So and for the listeners out there, I want to comment. We sound really good today. I might sound completely different. Do I sound different? You guys I'm on a new mixer. I got I'm on the beacon setup now. I got to say Mike, but I got the things that I sound any different, better, worse, happier.

Honestly, I didn't notice a difference. I would have to have an AB comparison. I don't have... My goal was to make it basically similar. I will say Sam, our lead editor, texted me and said that my mic has been clipping in the last few recordings and that he asked me to check that and so he already clipping during today's episode. It's because I'm incompetent and I don't know how to set up my microphone. And it's all Sam's fault. Sam will fix it.

Anyway, how are you guys doing? Small talk? Tired. I'm good. I have an update on my many hobbies. Which one is it? 3D guns? 3D guns?

Ammo farm? Where are we going? Look, it's about the render farm farm It's been working delightfully finally after four floor air conditioners two wall air conditioners That's some bitches actually staying at a steady time But the harsh realities of operating a render farm you built a freezer It's not that cold man even with all those I woefully It's not that cold man even with all those I woefully underestimated how much cooling was necessary But I have another problem entirely I

Got my power bill Did the seven air conditioners raise it slightly It's been up and down because we've been testing it, but we haven't been running it So the past month has been the first time it's been like running every day chugging, you know, beautiful renders My power bill was three thousand dollars Is your solar working or? Yeah it is It is Hahahaha Hahahaha I bet you wish you were a man with

five ovens instead of a man with seven air conditioners now don't ya I opened up that letter You know how they show a bar graph of your like monthly usage It was like oh and it's trending up as I'm testing. And then this past month was just astronomically.

Somehow it like comically goes off the paper. You just look at it, just like, you're like, what the fuck? I don't know what the power company thinks is going on at this place. You know, this place being a bathroom. You're gonna get raided by SWAT for a render farm, dude Yeah No

DEA is gonna show up and be like the power company thinks there's a grow farm here or something something crazy is happening So it must be drugs. Oh, there's a farm Find seven 3d printers a server farm 7 AC units and a bunch of 2d guns There's like a big wooden crate with like the rack in it and then just a bunch of pieces of paper with hand drawn AKs on it. This man's planning to raid the Looney Tunes. I got a gun safe and they're like,

oh for this safe, I'm like, all right, I'll open it. And just the avalanche of papers, you know, mask style with all the dollars coming out. For some reason they all have hand drawn serial numbers, but then their hands scratched out. For some reason they all have hand-drawn serial numbers but then their hands scratched out. Yeah, so that's my update and it's only going to, not gonna go down much in the next few months. So they didn't say anything about that though?

Cause like I, when we lived out there, we had, there was one summer where the really, one of the really bad fire summers happened and like we had all of our shit closed and sealed and we were running the AC just to try and keep positive pressure on our house because it was like toxic outside and our bill jumped by like 250% and the power company sent the bill and then they called and we're like are you guys okay are you good and I was like yeah there's fires and shit like I don't know it's been awful but they no one they just saw your bill and we're like alright.

Well if they did call I didn't answer but yeah I feel like they're probably more more into that. They're gonna think you're a render dealer and call you El Servo. I had this idea a long time ago Before I started building it a long time ago It feels like a long time ago like a year ago because with the Mac Studios Apple silicon it's very power efficient and I did some paper math that was like the power efficiency of this Cost over a period of time the cost of this like computer going on eBay and finding random stuff and the math showed me a year ago that the the power cost of the actual server grade stuff would be astronomically high and i'm like i must be doing my math wrong that can't be right and now here i am my math was right

congratulations oh dude 36 000 a year on power? You're saving so much. My yearly power bill is gonna be $36,000! Good math, I can tell ya. It's okay, you're getting that back, cause the server farm is very profitable, I assume. Oh, well technically it's saving me money. Technically. I think I'm deep. I think I'm deep in the red.

I have like, I don't wanna go and do the red. I don't want to go and do the math. It would have been so much better if I just hired another company. Oh man. Oh man. You factor in maintenance cost. I'm sure you're going to be well into the green. Well, maintaining it. I'm not hoping to do that. I'm hoping that when it dies it dies and I will just... Because there's no company I can send it back to. I've got it from eBay so and and it's not like I don't think I can sell it back again. So you spent a year working on this, getting it to work, you installed 70 air conditioning units, you're paying 3,000 a month and your idea is... When it dies it dies. I even now I'm like buying a whole room full of Mac Studios might have been the better option

How much globe or salt do you need for it to die in a tragic? Globorsalt accident very little if I go by that one guy on reddit Thought of what I was gonna do which was shove glob or salt inside the computers and immerse them So very little anyway, sorry sorry I gotta weep a little bit here. I understand, I would too if I had a $3,000 power bill. I will say to people who live outside of California, I don't know if it was the same, we lived in the Bay Area, your power bill can get out of hand pretty quick. I think the biggest single month power bill we ever had was like, I wanna to say it was like 700 bucks almost.

And we did not have a server farm. I did have two computers that I ran. I, that was during the period where I was streaming like eight to 10 hours a day. And we had, and it was like a hundred plus degrees for the entire month of July kind of deal. And so it was like a lot of usage, but three grand is a lot. Yeah, it's a lot. It's impressive.

In Ohio, that'd probably be like 600 bucks. It's that beautiful clean coal. As long as it floats over to the air around another state, it's clean here. Take that, Pennsylvania. Well, Wade, how much money have you wasted since the last time we talked? Okay, is it a waste if it's something you want

and you're enjoying it? Well, it's also pretty mean to say that Mark's wasting that it's not a waste but Girl Scout cookies arrived Alright vector. How many Girl Scout cookies did you buy? Nine-boxes That's not even that how much do they cost each? Okay. I actually bought 13 But I did that thing where you donate like four. Oh, I was like, I ate four of them so fast. So last year I went a little overboard and I had like six boxes of thin mints, like five boxes of the, what are they?

Dosey doughs or whatever they're called. The ones that kind of tastes like cinnamon toast or whatever, they got a little icing on them. I forget those are called, but they're really good. Molly likes the lemon ones. I got ones that are kind of just like a sugar cookie this year But last year I went a little bit too insane. I toned it down I only got nine boxes this year, which is still a lot. I mean has to last you a whole year That's really not that crazy Like like you buy you buy a lot and you keep the thin mints in the back of the freezer or you know

Whatever you just keep them around and Mints in the back of the freezer or whatever. You just keep them around. Thin Mints are so good. They are. Frozen Thin Mints on a hot summer day, not much compares in terms of cookies. I never like coconut in any other capacity than a Samoa. Yeah, Samoa. Those were my favorite and still are in my top three of all time. When I was a kid, those were my absolute favorites. Especially if they get warm because the caramel gets kind of soft.

Listen, Girl Scout cookies are like the thing to look forward to in spring. Can I just say, I've never gotten over the feeling of it, when it's Girl Scout cookie season, you know how they'll, every time you go to like a grocery store or anywhere, there's like a table with like a mom or a parent and like three girls and you walk in and they're just like, girl scout cookies and they're all like shy and adorable and stuff. And I know I like I try not to buy them. Is it possible to walk past that and not just feel like an asshole? I've never done it.

It's not a personal thing against those specific girls. I just probably already have the ones I need. The bigger update. Mm hmm. Car decision has been made. I just probably already have the ones I need. The bigger update. Mm-hmm. Car decision has been made. Is there a car parked somewhere on property that you won't? Cause that's really the litmus test.

I don't believe, I don't believe you. You've had decisions made before, so why is this different? Yeah, well, okay. This is hopefully, so I've got a meeting Thursday to try to see what we can do to actually get the car. It's not comp you buy it Yeah, but they never have no one has cars on lot anymore. It's all like order last time We got a car. I found a car on the lot on the internet

We showed up we test drove it that car was ours within five hours It was a long time of paperwork and bullshit, but we bought it same day because I picked it out online I was like, this is exactly the spec I wanted and but we bought it same day because I picked it out online and I was like, this is exactly the spec I wanted. And then we bought it because they had it and I knew they had it and we bought it. Well, I'm hoping we have a similar experience because I called the dealership and I told them,

I was like, I want one of these, can we find it? And he's like, I'll see what I can do. Let's meet. Then we started meeting for Thursday. So we'll see what happens. We'll see what happens. If you don't get a car, I don't know if I'll ever be able to trust you again.

I, listen, I'm going to find one. Goon-da, I'm going to find one. You have found one. You goon-da already. Yeah, but they didn't have the one in stock. I test drove a different model that was similar because they didn't have one on the lot. I'm hoping they can find one and actually get it.

I guess we'll see. I don't believe you. I don't even slightly believe you. At this point, I think you just make up the car thing so that you have something in your life to talk about that's not Hanabi, Path of Exile. Wade, are you sure that and look around you that there isn't a car in a box still in your office somewhere? Oh, that could happen. What if all the times we tried to get a Lexus, they actually did send us one and I just never knew because I'm cardboard blind, I can't see cardboard. It's actually the Lexus experience. They ship it to you in a beat up UPS box.

I got mine through Amazon, they just chucked it over the fence, I was so mad I ordered mine through team who showed up and it was it was a child-sized car was a fully functional complicated car Which is small. I got my car from wish.com I'm better at cracking jokes during mark segment than my own. I'll serve it was pretty funny. That was pretty funny News out there still depressing. So, you you know there's really nothing to say. Marsh Madness is going on I haven't watched any of it. I am so solidly in the middle of the pack of the family bracket challenge that my father-in-law set up. I'm killing it. It's the best I've ever done. I have Duke winning it all.

They're still in it as far as I know. They are. I don't think that's likely, but it's possible. Aren't they, aren't they well seeded? They're a number one seed. They're just not, uh, Houston. This seems to be the one everyone thinks is going to win. And Auburn is an outside shot. I don't see anyone talking about Duke winning.

The number one seeds that like everyone thinks are going to win often crumbled to pressure and it's one of the other ones that does win it. So we'll see. Pressure does get the teams eventually. I don't know anything about basketball. So I'm solidly in the middle of the pack is like basically top tier performance for me. So it's a family thing, right? So it's like family and a couple of family friends and stuff.

Almost everyone is in a similar area and there are definitely a couple of people who clearly knew something or got lucky and like are in the lead pretty solidly, but poor, uh, man, Mandy's poor brother, I don't know what he did to choose. I don't know if it was random or if he, he's not like a sports guy, but his, so our, right now where it stands is we all have somewhere in the neighborhood of like 45 to 50 some points in the way the points break down. Mandy's brother picked a team to win that's already out and has 22 points somehow,

and has only picked correctly 19 times out of 40 some games. Did he understand that the higher the number, the worse the seed? I don't know if he chose all underdogs or what. I don't think he even cares, but if he does, sorry, bud. He's like 16 is bigger than one. 16 is probably gonna win. It's not even like funny. Like, ha, you suck. It's like, damn, how did you even, how did that happen? Like shit. It's cause he tried to think about it. The reverse bracket, every game wrong. One of the things about brackets is as it goes

on your, your total amount of points you could earn, if all the rest of your choices were correct, is like, it lowers, right? Because every time you get one wrong, I can still earn 160 points on my bracket. That's the max score I can get. His max bracket score right now is 62 points, which is barely enough to compete with the people currently in the lead of our bracket challenge. So you're saying there's a chance. That's not what he's saying. That's not what he's saying at all. We rewind, we cut to him like actually like mad

scientist going through each team's roster like seeing their potential draft status and he's like trying to create he's like this is gonna be the best bracket we've ever seen and he never put more effort to anything in his life. And this is the result. It doesn't bode well for him that who did he pick to win it? He picked, Oh, he picked the Zags. He picked on Zag to win it, which is not a completely insane pick, but they were an eight seed. They're a good tournament team.

Like they're traditionally they're a good tournament team, but what was their seed this year? They were an eight seed. It's a bold strategy, but there's a chance no mark how's your bracket oh man if I did one this year well I've done one for the past few years and I've done it completely by random and each time I've beaten Tyler's bracket not lying multiple times I can't remember if it's every time. I'll bet that goes over well. But yeah, I just purely by random chance and I- I don't just win.

I crush- I crush him in points. Just absolutely destroy. I'm gonna put down better at sports than Tyler for a point for Mark. Yep, that's- that's true actually. I'm surprised you guys didn't do one for Go. He's gone. Oh Oh Where'd he go? He's gone Honorable how many times have I started a rumor that Tyler's dead?

At least one now I forget where this is all a delay because I forgot where he's going He told me many times, but he's not here I know where he was until the middle of the night last night That's very specific bird the porn guy if you guys remember the porn guy from the porn episode I found out that he had to take Tyler to the airport last night That's weird because I know where bird lives and it's not near where Tyler lives It is not meaning that Tyler was in fact gone Maybe that should be the the topic of this episode we need to get to the bottom of this

ASAP if we find out where he is by the end of this episode. We need to get to the bottom of this ASAP. If we find out where he is by the end of the episode, do we get a point? Yeah, you can have two points if you find out where he is by the end of the episode. Everybody starts texting Tyler, hey, where the fuck are you? I'm debating whether I text Tyler or do I reach for the Girl Scout cookies? Do I want the points or the sugar? All right, let's say we can't just text him directly. That would be cheating.

Should we get into the topic for today's episode? I gotta be honest, I looked and I'm only mediumly sure we haven't done something that's fairly similar to this, but I just sort of want to talk about it. I'm calling this episode probably, not maybe, something like Distractable Travel Guide Cincinnati. We have talked about Cincinnati and we have talked about like top 10 lists of things and whatever, but specifically what I want to talk about is travel guides. I have the sort of like a general list of things travel guides, travel books will give you recommendations on.

And I kind of want to just go through those normal categories, but I want to get the distractible insider recommendations. We know Cincinnati. There's any three people that know Cincinnati, know her bowels, where she buries her bodies. It's us. Interesting. So yeah, I just wanna, we're just gonna, this is a good resource if you're traveling to Cincinnati,

this would be a great place if you need family activities, if you're looking for, you know, where to stay, where not to stay, food to eat, you know, that sort of stuff. So I just wanna do that. We'll just run through all the categories. First one I feel like is gonna be easy. Cincinnati attractions and activities. This is like historical sites, museums, natural

wonders, festivals, anything that's like fun. Like a thing where you go and maybe you buy a ticket or you like go for the day and it's like the thing you do. What you guys got for me? You're assuming that when I was in Cincinnati I actually went out and did things. I know that you did lots of stuff in Cincinnati, Mark. We lived together. You were coming and going at all hours, not just sitting on your computer playing wow 18 hours a day.

Yeah, you know me. I was a real, real, real, whatever you call someone that goes out and does things. I was a real one of those. A real Mark. That's what I call it. Leaving a mark. Yeah, you left your mark. That's good. Not, not, I'm not gonna get a good point for that, but then it is close. Uh, and if you don't have any ideas, you have to give me something. So if it has to be made up, that's fine. But uh, no one else will know. Real activities are worth waiting. Yeah. No one's going to know. No one's going to use this. There is no way you don't have

any. I have, I have, I I have something are you plagiarize enough my list cuz you had zero two seconds ago I saw it on your face how where how is he seeing your list what's happening I have one Kings Island that was my list I was hoping I was hoping that would make it in here yeah yeah Kings Island it's basically theme park it lost a lot of theming back after the Paramount days ended but now they have Snoopyland? Do they have Snoopy? Is there Snoopy there? I think that still exists or Peanuts? Yeah, Peanuts stuff. They have Viking ship so that's pretty themy. And then they

have, I haven't been there in a bit, but they have not the Phantom Menace, the, the, the, the Phantom. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do. I love that land at Kings Island. Is it called just the Phantom? They have Danny Phantom, the ride. Is it a coaster, are you talking about like the

Phantom Theater, which is no longer there? No, it's the one they built after the Son of Beasts broke broke down which was the tallest fastest and only looping wooden roller coaster Onlyist loopiest wooden coaster they had like fire bird or something, but they closed that one That's the one where you like you're on your your stomachs like hanging out or whatever the whole time your stomachs hanging out You lay on your tongue you like lay on your back at first, but then like you're hanging so it's like you're dangling, but I think they closed that one.

I never got to do that one, so. My favorite one is the one that used to be called Top Gun, and now it's called like Ace or something, but when you're standing in line all the sad old speakers are still like do do do do do do do and playing like the Top Gun music, but it's like de-branded. The danger zone. Banshee! Banshee! There you go, we were just stalling so you could get there.

I liked Banshee, but I can't write it that much because it's like all corkscrews and loops and I get very motion sick very quickly because it's just like, flub-a-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du-du- DUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUDUD there was lore. Oh yeah, oh yeah. Oh damn, I didn't know that. But now the Son of Beast was plagued by problems from its inception. Nothing good came out of that roller coaster. Many people had like whiplash and just shaking up spine syndrome, you know, that syndrome. I do get it. I like a wooden coaster. I thought that was, for a while when I was younger, wooden coasters were one of my favorite kinds of things,

but they're so violent. Like, I think it's funny that people who are wooden coaster enthusiasts are like, oh, this one's my favorite. I almost died. It shakes so violently. It dislocated my spine in three places. It's the best.

It's like, I don't know if that's, like it's fun because it's kind of a different experience But I don't know if the most violent wooden coaster means it's the best wooden coaster I mean streak up at Cedar Point was my favorite for a while. That's a good classic wooden coaster Kings Island's get slowly becoming that I mean they were bought by Cedar Point So every roller coaster they add they get closer and closer to God They're getting taller man, They're gonna reach them eventually. What's the really tall one that they put in like 20 years ago?

Top Thrill Dragster. Are you talking about, yeah, Cedar Point? No, no, Kings Island. Oh. I'm just blanking on the name of it, but they actually finally just put in one taller than that one now too. Are we talking about a drop tower?

We talking about a roller coaster? No it's just a roller coaster that was the tallest roller coaster they had to like the last five years they put in a bigger one finally. I gotta be honest I don't know the coasters at Kings Island as well as I do at Cedar Point. Yeah it's been a long time since I've been there. The Tallster! Oh that might be it.

Oh I do know what you're talking about! Yeah the Diamondback. Diamondback. Diamondback, yeah. The seats on Diamondback do not make you feel like you're locked in. It's like a little bucket seat, and then there's a single small pole with like a little pelvis-sized handle

that like comes towards you. Oh, those are the best. That's the thing that makes it exciting though. The seats have nothing on the side So it's just like open air everywhere and you're on this little seat that's separated from the seat next to you Or it's like one by itself and man Oh, man When you start to go down a hill and you feel your body lift up and the only thing holding you down is this little

rickety yellow pole It's thrilling but also kind of like it would be so easy to die here Yeah, well, you're not supposed to try to get out but I wouldn't but I've No, that's the thing. I like that's the thing I like more than coasters being like violent or lots of loops or whatever the the minimal restraint feeling is one of the things That makes it most exciting to me I forget what it was but there was some coaster or it was like a wooden coaster and it was literally like a little seatbelt. Like you get in and you just go click and snug it down. And that's what held you in. And then you go and the

whole time you're on the coaster, you're like, I'm barely in here. Holy shit. It's awesome. Cause they would definitely not design it in a way where you could get hurt. That never happens. Right? I want to feel like I'm in a tank when I'm on the roller coaster, like a convertible tank. That's not exciting. Yeah. What's the point of that? If you can't actually die, it's not even exciting at all. Big blowy, big safe. You know, I could just have a leaf blower and you could close your eyes and I could just blast you in the face. You know, the kid where there's like a video of a mom with their baby and they're like on a chair and they're watching a video of a roller coaster and the mom is like, I can do that for you. I would let you have fun.

Giant Wade sitting on Mark's tiny little short legs. No, he's on a chair. Your little homunculus legs. What? Homunculus is now like a tiny like a hat. Yeah, your homunculi- legs. Yeah, okay, cool. I want bouncy. Wade, what's your attraction or activity in Cincinnati?

I'm gonna go with one that I don't know that we've mentioned here before, but that is pretty like, I'm sure there are other museums like this, but we have an underground railroad museum because back in the day that was a thing that happened was Kentucky was part of the South, Ohio was part of the North. The underground railroad came through here, so we have an underground railroad museum. And I guess whenever you live here and you just have that,

you kind of don't think about it as something that like not many other places do have, but there probably aren't that many of them, I would think, I don't know. It's a very large museum and it's in a very cool, it's down on the banks, but where like the sports stadiums and stuff are, it's very cool.

It doesn't take super, I mean, you can take your time through it, but it's not like it takes hours and hours and hours to get through. So you can like make a nice day trip down to downtown, walk around or go to some of the parks and you can go to the Underground Railroad Museum, cause there is a lot of cool stuff around it too. It's super easy to, in general, when you live in a place to take for granted stuff like

that, like museums and educational stuff, that Cincinnati Museum Center is also a fantastic museum and a very cool building because it's Cincinnati Union Terminal, it used to be, and now it's like a big museum. It's great, cool. It's what's it art deco the main place where you enter it is like a three-story dome half dome thing that's got a huge Mural all over the wall. Well, I guess I can't say that one as an idea now. No one's so obvious mark Shut up. It's not that all right fine. What was that your idea though? Was that your I was gonna say that yeah There's it's it's you know, but whatever there's the Ohio River

There is you like water get in there start this motion You like water that can light on fire Is it still like I know that's the that's the thing about the Ohio River, but is it actually still that bad? I don't know. No, it's not like actually it'll light on fire at any given moment right now but it's pretty gross still in general I think so I like you know we've heard that for years and years but I know there's a lot of traffic there's a lot of barges and things a lot of like transport that goes on so it's probably not the cleanest but actually don't know

how bad it really is I would love to have a comparison of like seeing what the river looked like before People came around and started building big fire generating Facilities aiming their poop tubes into the river rooting their feces down in there Yeah, like is the Mississippi the Ohio thing dumps into the Mississippi, right? So is the Mississippi clean? If the Ohio's clean not clean, I wouldn't assume that. Apparently it's not great, not advised to swim or recreation in there because of bacteria, algae blooms and general contamination,

though some sections are monitored and may be safe at times. It doesn't seem great, but are you gonna trust these scientists or are you gonna get on that pontoon and are you gonna start boating what's the opposite of enlightenment I feel like that's the era we're in in darkenment are you gonna trust science and knowledge and literature and facts they would know where the endarken mid era anyway so yeah there's that which is weird because not many people know this but Cincinnati actually has some Of the cleanest drinking water in the country. I don't know if that's the case anymore. It was when I was growing up

That's surprising. I don't know what they do to treat it But if you guys remember we had that big train accident like Eastern, Ohio near Pennsylvania and like they had the big chemical spill And they were like oh, it's gonna contaminate the water It was tested here in Cincinnati, and I remember they were like, um, I mean, we put more chemicals in, but like we tested before we did that and our chemicals already pretty much neutralized everything. So there was never really an issue. So whatever they do to treat it, apparently they were ready for nuclear waste or whatever the heck got in. I don't know what the spill was, but. I remember there was this joke on, um, the Colbert report where he was making his own

bottled water and he was touring around the country being like we filled this glacier and then this Spring and they went all around the country and they said and we finish it off with a A little dollop of cincinnati tap water and everyone in the crowd went But it was one of the cleanest so they didn't know they didn't know Actually, I'm looking at the ranking right now, and I think Cincinnati's dropped quite a bit. Is it bad news? Well, it's not bad news, but instead of being up there. It's now a hundred and ninth out of 50 states Yes, the great state of Cincinnati. I know some of Cincinnati uses like the Miami or Little Miami River.

Some of it uses the Ohio River, so on and so forth. It's not bad. I mean, generally water and tap water in Cincinnati is fine. It's a little hard, you know, got the got the minerals in it or whatever. But I guess I shouldn't talk too much. I still drink bottled water. But there's some places in Cincinnati where I like to tap water. You don't drink, you don't just drink,

don't you have like a fridge with a filtered water thing in it or anything? We don't have a fridge with a filtered water thing, but we do have one of those filtered water things on, You don't drink that? Our kitchen sink thing. I do sometimes. It's okay. It's good.

I like the bottled stuff better, but it's not bad. Weird. That sounds like a judgment against you. I've just always found that confusing. Bottled water for me was always, just the way my parents treated it was like a thing where it's like if you're in an emergency or if you're like out on the boat on the lake or something you drink bottled water but otherwise we just drink tap water you freaking you weenies or well water we drink a lot of well

water when we went like camping and stuff well water is funky it didn't hurt me as far as I know so I didn't drink a lot of water like I went like camping and stuff. Well water is funky. It didn't hurt me as far as I know. So I didn't drink a lot of water. Like I feel like I always had pop in my hand. I always had Coke or, like growing up, I was very bad about drinking just caffeine products. So I had to like make myself switch over to start drinking a lot more water.

And like, I don't know if it was like the holding something in my hand, like a can or a bottle that helps, but like getting a bottle of water is actually would help me break my like caffeine habit. No, I don't know if it was like the holding something in my hand, like a can or a bottle that helps. But like getting a bottle of water is actually help me break my like caffeine habit. No, I definitely get that. I what I'm trying clearly I'm not right now. But when I'm trying to cut out caffeine, one thing that helps me is what the fuck is that murder, murder water, death water, liquid death, murder water cans of liquid death, because they're kind of they're

this same kind of can that like energy drinks come In and stuff having those as a thing where it's like I go crack one of those open it like replaces the physical stem of When I have my energy drink in my hand and that so I get that I do get that man I haven't had caffeine for like a month and a half now. Ooh, that's getting into the good part. You're finally through the bad part maybe. I mean, there's probably traces of decaf that I was drinking. You like the AI generated stupid mug?

This was a gift from one of our family members and they didn't know it was AI. It's just like this stupid, it's a library. Sure, sure. Anyway, so yeah, I haven't had caffeine for a long time and I miss it. Do you feel the benefits yet though or still meh? Yeah, I do.

I do think that it's generally more even, I don't have that slump of energy and I never thought that it actually gave me energy and awakeness, but on a day like today where I've only gotten like five hours of sleep last night because I've been I've been working and I just I really want it. Well I think it was Socrates who said the uncaffeinated life is not worth living.

Okay so we've got attractions. Got one each. A couple. Mark had an Ohio River and. No I just mean Mark and I have been really stalling this episode out. We're afraid. Because you only have so many good ideas you want to keep them- I got it. Well, that's okay. Now's your chance. Dining options.

Specifically, I'm gonna say, not budget, but like reasonably priced family dining options. Okay, I got you. But not chains. I mean, you can do a chain if you want, but like interesting Cincinnati stuff, yeah. Imagine you throw open the doors and you're like, oh, this isn't a restaurant. This is like a store. And then you walk through the store and you realize, wait, there's a restaurant in the back.

They got a big fireplace. They got all this shit on the wall. It's beautiful. Sit down in these lovely wooden chairs. Oh man, it's so decorative. Like it's so decorative. Do you not know where this is going yet, Wade? No, I think I do.

I just didn't like the description of shit on the wall. They make the best chicken and dumplings you've ever, ever eaten in your life. Just, mm, ah, so good. I order that sometimes with green beans, corn, extra dumplings, maybe biscuits with like some blackberry jam, you know? What is this magical place called, Mark?

Ah, I barely remember the name. I only visited it once or twice. Is it that place that originated in Lebanon, Tennessee? No. Oh, okay, good. No, it's not. You stupid. Tell us about this since any place. God, what is that name? Hmm. Uh, oh well, can't remember the name, but really good right outside of Milford you get off the highway there

There's a also a movie theater next to it. We should buy that No, it's really it's a really good info for a travel guide a vague location No name just start going into places and once you find one that matches the description, you'll know you're there. How did you end up here with all the Cincinnati places? How did you end up in a chain that goes around the whole country? That's just where he wants to go.

Every time Mark is anywhere near Cincinnati, he's like, what if I can get to Cracker Barrel? I need more dumplings. Oh, it does sound, actually I kinda wanna go there now. I'm not headed in a minute. I haven get to Cracker Barrel I need more dumplings oh it does sound actually I kind of want to go there now I'm not had in a minute I haven't had Cracker Barrel since the last time all of us were at one together and I don't remember where that was it was like on the tour or something that's weird I was just I could picture the restaurant like I can picture us being there didn't we like stop on the west coast leg of the tour at a Cracker

Barrel along the highway somewhere and had like Cracker Barrel all of us at one big table. I think so, yeah. It was like a travel day. It was like we didn't have shows. We were just like on the road all day sort of deal. Yeah, I remember. That's the last time I had it. There isn't one like close enough to our house where it's like a thing that comes up. Cause you know, you're always like, oh, we should go out. Where should we go? And the closest Cracker Barrel is like maybe the Milford one, which is not very close to us. Are we doing one round of this or multiple rounds of this don't ask questions I want to throw out so many names well pick a starting place, and then we'll see how many more I let you say Whenever you're feeling good and hungry

It's skyline time Gather together with friends and family It's Skyline time. Listen, I don't know why you're suggesting the not Cincinnati one, or, you know, Gold Star. Gold Star Chili, this is Cincinnati flavor. Cincinnati flavor, right? So it's the Cincinnati flavor. How is Skyline, which is the entire thing, is the skyline of Cincinnati, not a Cincinnati thing.

Oh, that's not what it's named after. This is the man that picked Cracker Barrel, which originated in Tennessee, as Cincinnati flavor. Its logo still is the skyline of Cincinnati. I don't think so. Oh, you're right. I'm going to give Mark a right point. Oh, you got to go with skyline.

If you're feeling it, one. I mean, La Rosa's pizza is apparently controversial. I love La Rosa's pizza, but... La Rosa's pizza? I agree with Bob. I've never liked La Rosa's pizza. I think it's just not a good pizza. I don't like the experience at the restaurants.

Never eat at the restaurant. Yeah, I just... If I could pick any, any pizza, La Rosa's would be at the rock bottom. I would still eat it, but I would not be happy about it at all. I do still eat it. It's not like I see it and I'm like, ugh, inedible,

but I would rather have almost any other chain pizza. If I had to pick an Ohio specific pizza joint, is Donatoatos popular enough? Is that Cincinnati? Exclusive? It's, I think it's Columbus, but it's like an Ohio thing. I don't know if I've ever had Donatos. The name is familiar. Their thin crust is very good. I thought that was a national chain. I didn't realize that was local.

No, that's, that's an Ohio thing. Donatos in Columbus is a lot like La Rosa's this year that our Donatos was like sponsored my youth baseball team and we would go there after you know after a baseball game or whatever and when we did like give it out the trophies to everyone we go to Donatos and you have Donatos pizza and it's the whole thing it's like that kind of place but I much prefer that to LaRosa's but I ate LaRosa's recently it was bad as I remember I really like it but people do seem very divided on LaRosa's for some reason I really do like it I think it depends if you grew up with it I did grow up with

it just like you they sponsored basketball and stuff so I had it a lot of events I don't think LaRosas is bad enough where it's like oh I would never like I'm never eating there again but it's not better than just like Pizza Hut or somewhere oh wow I disagree with that but it depends if you grew up with it I think because there's definitely stuff that I grew up with that is objectively not the best I still have not had blue-ash chili. That's the so we're talking about chili places that we haven't compared So I haven't tried blue ash chili. It's one on my list to try I want to go there and have it when we go out to eat. We generally just pick somewhere like, you know else

Obviously, there's a Brazilian steakhouse. We found here that I didn't know existed called Texas State Brazil over in Kenwood. Thank you, Bob. Sorry. We've done reading there, you know, when we go out to eat we pick somewhere else. Yeah, I guess you do, don't you? It'd be weird if you picked Blue Ass Chili and ended up not ever eating there. You never picked a place to chili and ended up not ever eating there you never picked a place to eat ended up somewhere else I mean probably that has happened, but not repeatedly. I don't know. That's a weird situation

We get in the car like today's the day we're making the blue-ass chili. Is that a melting pot? We gotta go there You know, we've not had five guys in a minute better pull in here Texas day Brazil is really good. It's relatively new It's very good. My only qualm compared to like a foco is their salad bar doesn't have any fruit. I didn't even notice that I don't usually go for the fruit. I don't know why but I like having fruit like so if I went there looking for pineapple or something there was none. I actually just had a Brazilian steakhouse experience in Austin that left me bewildered. It's after we do this little shoot in Texas and Amy can attest to this we sit down And we were gonna have more but then two other people cancelled so it was like a smaller table, but it was bright

Super bright sterile bright like it's a department store just bright in the restaurant And it was it was not a photo with some other Brazilian steakhouse. And it was confusing to us. Everything didn't make sense. It was so bright. The walls were just pure white. You could see everybody, everything. And they had candles on the table that were on, but it's like you couldn't even tell they were on. It was so bright ever. So we actually asked the waiter, like, is it supposed to be this bright and it's like no Let me go check and then they we they take the knob and they go

You know like the tiniest picked out and I see the banders looking up being like you know I'm like, it's too much cranks it back up And I'm looking over at the other side like there's a bar area over there and it's so moody and dim it's so beautiful and so we asked the waiter like hey since we're not gonna have a big table it's a six-top here let's just go over to one of those smaller tables and that'll be great like okay no problem we'll move you over there and we move over they sit down and then the bartender's like oh people are here cuz no one else was seated so he reaches over to the light switch and raises the light and turns to the light and it's so beautiful and booty and he goes like shhh hey listen I got you guys

does everyone there need like a brow lift is there like eyebrow just hanging on their lids and keeping their eyes closed and they're like I can hardly see I have no idea like everyone knows or at least I think everyone knows that if you go to a restaurant it's kind of nice when it's dim you're not that way you're not looking at everybody else in the restaurant. It's not like a cafeteria where you're just like trying to be there. It's nice, you know?

You get this little isolated pocket of darkness, you know? But no, that place was anti-that. I like to think that when people come in, they're like, oh, we had a party of three, you're by yourself? And they just sit someone at your table with you, like. Oh, you mean like at hibachi restaurants. Oh, yeah Yeah, I guess so yeah about you though you kind of you expect it a little bit because the way it's designed

But no I hate that it's awful. It's the worst if I don't have a party of ten for hibachi. I'm not interested Oh, I don't mind Molly it drives Molly nuts, but I'll converse with anybody Oh God if I if someone is at the table with us for hibachi they fucking better not talk to me. They better not acknowledge I exist. I read the room I do just focus on who I'm with but if someone else is like obviously like chatty and looking for it I'll give it to them. Conversation I mean. Good I'm glad you clarified. I love Cincinnati. All right, Mark, do you have any other restaurant recommendations for our travel guide to very valuable Cincinnati information? Oh, do I? No is an acceptable answer.

I'm just checking. I was asking a question. Do I? No, I do not. All right, Wade, what do you got? This is a really good opportunity for you to get more points here. Montgomery and Jeff Ruby's,oto Soto Soto's greater size cream United Dairy Farmers.

Oh my God, we have so much. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What about you? UDF is a restaurant that you'd recommend. I guess you mean for dessert. Yeah, the ice cream. Yeah. They have a little ice cream parlor. It's a gas station.

Look, it is cool. It is. It's a gas station. Let's not put that foot forward when we're putting out places we want to recommend people to go visit when they're here. He might be in the right because at most of them, there also is a seating area. Of like three little two-top tables wedged in the corner by the ice cream bar. We had a- so it's actually- I'm glad I don't work there anymore because they've added so much stuff that people there have to do. You can now order like crazy drinks.

You can have like sandwiches and chicken tenders and stuff ordered at some of them. What? They have nachos and cheese. We had like a little grill where you could get like sausages and breakfast type like hot dogs, things like that. So people would come in there. Sometimes sometimes they get breakfast, which I found weird to come to UDF, get like a coffee and a hot dog. I mean, 7-Eleven also does often have those things things but I wouldn't think of 7-eleven as a restaurant So saying that for UDF is kind of generous. It's not a restaurant. I will not call it a restaurant

Okay, but I've heard about Cincinnati things that have food that is good I do like UDF ice cream graders is obviously the superior ice cream place But UDF has so many more flavors that it is good ice cream. It is good ice cream. It just feels, that feels like, if you come to the Cleveland area, make sure you have a nice dinner at Sheetz. It's like, yeah, Sheetz is cool, but also it's a gas station. I am pretty sure that the one place whenever I went to do an AbleGamers event with Craig years ago, I'm pretty sure the one place he said I had to have on the way was Sheetz. Oh, Craig is very pro Sheetz.

But that's because I think large part Craig is vegan. And Sheetz is one of those places where you can order it yourself. You walk up to a little screen and order it, and you can fully customize it. So for him, that's like a wonderland because he can get all kinds of, he's not just like, give me plain potato

because everything else for some reason has meat in it or something I took him and Mia to Bogota chow years ago because I completely forgot but they were so happy because the salad bar was so good but I remember we went to sit down and I like looked at him and smiled that was then it like hit me before we ordered it in a before we went up to Get our whatever and I was like oh No I just brought vegans to an all you can eat meat buffet you guys excited for meat sword restaurant I love meat sword, but admittedly the salad bar is really nice, so no that's true the salad bars are top-notch Yes, it's true. The salad bars are top notch. Yeah, Cincinnati. Cincinnati doesn't have a FOGO.

Texas State, Brazil, go there. The salad bar is not as good as FOGO, according to Wynn. Around the only not dying mall left in Cincinnati, which is Kenwood Mall. Dude, all the malls are really depressing. Frye County, gone. Eastgate, Eastgate is on its last leg, I think. It's not looking so hot. It makes sense. I mean, it really does.

I know a lot of people are depressed and nostalgic about it because of like, yeah, I do enjoy a mall, but at the same time it's like, it doesn't make sense now in today's age where you don't need- Kenwood's still bustling. Like Kenwood Mall feels like the way malls felt. Kenwood, yeah, Kenwood is still really nice and busy and stuff a lot of the time

I feel like that one's bustling because it's so central like all the other ones are on the outskirts So a city nowadays like this is the thing Not all of the stores are gonna just go away like the people that think that aren't gonna be brick-and-mortar stories in the future Ever is are stupid and wrong because people still walk around in the living world Rick and I think said Rick and Morty, that makes more sense. Rick and Morty. The Rick and Morty stores, you know. Oh, go Rick and Morty! But Kenwood Mall is great because it's central and I think a city still wants that.

There should be that because it's like people want to go there, number one, just because it's kind of nice to have this big building with a lot of little stores. It's fun to walk around and do that window shopping. It's a different experience. So people still want it. It's just they want less of them. There doesn't need to be five malls in a city limits when there can be one in the middle that people can go to.

Admittedly, the parking's hell. Kenwood is a nightmare of traffic. No, that's the thing. So I will say one of the other malls in the Cincinnati area that's doing okay, Liberty Center, you guys know Liberty Center? It's over on like the Northwest side by us kind of. It's one of those where part of it is an inside,

there's like a smaller inside part. And then part of it, a lot of it is outside where it's like there are little streets and you can, all the shops are outdoors, but it's like there are there are little streets and you can all the shops are outdoors but it's still basically like a mall area. It's very cool and I feel like that's that's a type of mall that I could see being successful in the future more than like an old school mall but it's still such a pain in the ass. There are stores that are there and only there and will still for me it's still like, I really need this.

Do I am I up for going to Liberty and trying to find parking and then trying to navigate through? But I even though I like it, it still is like that. And Kenwood's like that, too. Every time we have to go to Kenwood, it's kind of like Kenwood. And then you remember you have to fucking go drive over to Kenwood and park somewhere. Are there still ever events where people have like the GameStop midnight release lines or new console release lines?

Is that a thing of the past? You just order it. If people who care that much, do you either download it digitally or you order it and it arrives, you know, on or after release day or whatever? They don't they don't. I did. They don't do that at all the same way they used to. Even like for iPhones, they don't really do that anymore. I think the last event that probably that happened

was for the Vision Pro, and that was just because it was a new thing, people wanted to try it, but they didn't even sell out of those, so. There is one event I saw that was similar. Kenwood Mall had a thing where, I don't know if it was a singer or who it was, but there was some celebrity that had a pop-up

clothing line store that was in Cincinnati for a limited time, so they opened a, they called it a pop-up store where this person's merch was being sold for 48 hours or something, so people were crazily in line trying to get in there while we were there one day. Did you ever wait in line down in Clifton by UC for any of the games? Oh yeah, no I think it might have been Modern Warfare 2 down in Clifton. I did them in that release for.

Did you have the people dumping water on people from the front line? I actually lived in UPA when that happened so yeah I knew those guys. It never hit me but like I was there watching it happen. I lived on the corner so I was not one of the apartments where the water came from. But, but I knew, I knew those, I knew those guys who did that. I knew one of those apartments where they did that. They thought it was real funny. I tried for so many years to get a job at that GameStop in Clifton, dude. I wanted to be a GameStop employee so bad. Oh my God.

I applied there too at one point. Never heard of it. The poor guy who managed that store, I can't imagine how many college nerds he had every day come in and be like, hey, are you hiring? You need a, I play video games. He's someone who knows video games. I play at least three. I mean, it is kind of nice, I guess, if you were an employer and you had a constant stream of semi-qualified people always on hand.

Oh, we weren't qualified. I said semi-qualified people always on hand. I wasn't qualified, we weren't qualified. I said semi, I said semi-qualified. That's still pretty generous. All I wanted was the employee discount. I wasn't there to do anything else. Like approaching a drug dealer, like, hey, can I be one of your dealers? I use your stuff every day.

Can I get an employee discount on these drugs, please? Please? Just don't do a background check What they did they did they're like hey this shows you got got some backed up parking tickets I don't need that on my staff. I don't need that in our organization. So we're gonna have to pass Thank you for your interest. Please remain a loyal customer I imagine a lot of people are Apple employees because I believe there's an employee discount there. You have to be pretty, isn't working at an Apple store like a whole pain in the ass though?

You have to be pretty serious about that. It's like there's like trainings and that's one of the places. Walking into an Apple store, we did that recently, it feels like it's the 2000s in there. Like in most stores, I feel like the direction in the last couple decades has been less employees, more just let the customer sort of self-serve. There's maybe there's an employee somewhere if you need help, you can find them. I feel like the Apple store, they had more people working there than there were people in the store by a huge margin. There were so many fucking employees at the Apple store.

That's why they charge $100,000 for every product they sell. I mean yeah I guess they have the margins for it but it's crazy. It feels like it feels even though it's new technology it feels somehow like retro almost at this point where it's like just a swarm of people you go in and there's just everywhere there's someone who's like hey do you need help with that? Hey you need help finding you looking at headphones? Ah, ah. There's always the one security guard who looks like he's relatively chill,

but also like he really wants an excuse to tackle somebody at the same time. Oh, he's desperate. He's waiting. Well, actually, I don't think they actually stop people from leaving because they're like, we track all of those devices, they're ours, so.

That's true. There's not much you could get away with with an Apple product. They'd just be like, yeah, this serial number, just turn that off. That one's stolen. It's either one or the other because you go to Best Buy and you can't find a soul in there. It's hide and seek with the employees. You see one and they look at you and they go. One of the many refrigerators we've bought in the last few years was we went to Best

Buy first because they had like a refrigerator they had like a Partnership we couldn't find a person we had to go to a different store because we were literally like we want this fridge Is there a per we couldn't get a human being to tell us a refrigerator? It was fucking we and that was a few years ago at this point. That's four or five years. It's weird That is always the case you try to get a TV you try to get anything at Best Buy am i half-baser is that like that's how stores are now I don't do a lot of shopping so probably I usually get help at the Lego store under the Lego store a couple times there's like two employees at the Lego store what store Lego they actually have

been in that Lego store every time we go to Kenwood I feel like I need to check it out so I do I've got like three Lego sets I still need to build but whenever I go there I'm still like I gotta go to the Lego store. Yeah well you want to have them backed up. It's like if I'm good while Molly does the actual shopping I'm allowed to go to the Lego store. Well I feel like our travel guide is pretty comprehensive but last chance yeah last chance you guys got any extra bonus stuff to chuck in at the end of the travel guide here Just in case one of the things that I Neglected about Cincinnati when I lived in it that a lot of people probably would overlook is there is a stupid amount of parks and they're too big that

That's not a problem really, but it's just, even where I was growing up in Milford, like there's just park over here, park over here, just big field, you know, it's not even a park, but there's just a big open field here, woods there, stuff like that, in the city, outside the city, just parks everywhere. Like in Milford, you're talking about like Miami Meadows,

which is the bigger park there. It's gigantic, it's too big. I didn't even realize how big it was when I was first there. They have the whole field when you first pull in. They've got, I think they tore the skate park down, but there was a skate park. There was the basketball hoops, soccer fields.

I guess they had the football field, the whole playground, baseball cages, well maintained. The Midwest and Cincinnati definitely is on this list, loves a big, gigantic, ridiculously oversized park and they are generally very nice and well maintained. I don't know if Mark's reference is this, but we lived in the Bay Area, right? We lived outside San Francisco. Huge parks. California has awesome nature, like parks everywhere. It was great. Every time we ever went to a park, even in the middle of the day on a weekday when you're like, nah, no one will be here. Fucking packed. Humanity in every direction,

bicycles on all the paths. There's no like, there's no, in California, my experience was never you go to a park and it's like calm and empty and you can, you can do whatever you want. It's like, if you're going to the park to play in the playground, the playground's busy. You have to wait in line. If you're going to the park to walk on the path, there's like a hundred people and some of them are going twice the speed of light and some of them are going slower than you think is physically possible to walk. So you're like weaving traffic. There's bicycle.

Like the parks in California are generally awesome, but they're so fucking busy that they're not very fun. A lot of the times to be at in Ohio You go to a park that's the same size or bigger than some of those ones We went to in California, but there's like two other humans in the entire thing and you're like I've never had to wait for anything Yeah, there's everything is open. You could go you could you don't have to like wait or be like, oh, that's busy Let's go over here. Anything you want is always available. It's amazing. Even when the basketball courts were slammed, it was like there was enough room for everyone to play.

There's even an open pickleball court on a Saturday morning at parks in Ohio. God forbid you want to play pickleball in California. Fucking there's a three hour wait of people in line to who are next up on the pickleball court no that's a good one I like them wait city good city good okay who said the streetcar who said sports teams who said the Cincinnati Symphony Orchestra is one of the best in the nation among the best in the world beer lots of best in the world. Beer, lots of beer in Cincinnati, people love beer. Oktoberfest, big deal.

Taste of Cincinnati, another good one to hit. Any of that stuff. This is technically not Cincinnati, but I've gotta give it a shout out. Newport in general is honestly like, if you're a teenager or like a young adult, Newport's actually a pretty cool hangout place. It's basically Cincinnati. I mean it is, because it's right across the adult, Newport's actually a pretty cool hangout place. It's basically Cincinnati.

I mean it is because it's right across the river but it's Kentucky. No it's not that's Cincinnati stuff. Cincinnati reaches all the way out to the airport because Cincinnati airport is with the fuck in Tinktucky for some reason. So all of that is clearly Cincinnati. I do not know what CVG stands for. Cincinnati Very Good Airport. I think it's Covington? Like so many airports are just like MSP, Minnesota St. Paul, Cincinnati, CVG, ah yes, Svaginati,

Svaginati, that's not good. Covington Kentucky is what that stands for apparently. That's not good. That's a bad one. That's a bad one. That's a bad one. That's a bad one. Covington, Kentucky is what that stands for, apparently. CBG is just Covington. Yeah, no, Ohio's airports are all confusing because Columbus, the airport used to just be Columbus International, so it was like CBI or something like that. Now it's John Glenn International Airport. So the Columbus Airport's initial is like J-G-A-I

or some shit where it's like, what the fuck airport is that? Where is that? I've only flown into Columbus like once because obviously I don't know why I would, but. It's not exactly a big airport or anything, but that's growing up there, that's where we flew out of a lot.

It's very confusing. I don't know that any of ours are. Cincinnati is actually a very small airport. We have two terminals. Cincinnati is at least a Delta hub. Not that that means anything because our flight options even on Delta out of Cincinnati are pretty garbage these days, but it is. It's technically a Delta hub. All right, Wade's thing is the airport. Got it. Sure. I said Newport, but I'll take airport, you know, I guess. Newport has the aquarium. I should have said aquarium. Hey, Newport Aquarium, if you had said that,

that would have been very good. Oh man, the zoo, the Festival of Lights. The zoo is also good. Cincinnati Zoo and Botanical Gardens, excellent. One of the best zoos in the country. Cron's Conservatory, we have that. Is that the place you guys got married? No, no, that was, yeah, Cincinnati Nature Center, I believe.

Anyway, whatever. If you come to Cincinnati, I feel like we gave you any number of acceptable quality places to check out. At least three, including Cracker Barrel. No, I was thinking of a different restaurant. Welcome to Cincinnati Bucket. Anyway, that's the end of the episode. I'm going to read you why you got points and then we're going to spin the wheels and then

someone's going to win, I hope. Oh yeah, you got to add then we're gonna spin the wheels and then someone's gonna win, I hope. Oh yeah, you gotta add to the wheel too. Wade, you got points for... El Servo, Girl Scout Cooks, Lying About Your Car Again, Underground Railroad Museum, Goodrec, Skyline, uh, we usually pick somewhere else to eat,

a lot of restaurants listed, and... airport? Question mark? That's wrong, Colin. Mark, you earned points for traffic light. Don't remember why that was points. Our shirts. Our shirts. Oh yeah, we're a traffic light.

There you go. You know, the old blue, orange, red. $3,000 power bill. Better at sports than Tyler. Kings Island. Not Cracker Barrel. Being Right, Rick and Morty stores, and big stupid parks. The score is close, but it's time for the wheel. I don't know what the score is.

It's close. I'm gonna roll a three-sided die and I got two. And I am going to add... Well, this one feels like it's just a bonus star for Mark, but my initial thought was most travel since last episode. That's 100% gonna be Mark 100% of the time. It will always be him though. Sometimes he's... No, it will pretty much always be him.

Well, I mean, if I don't... Sometimes I don't go anywhere. Like I don't even leave my house, but then you do too. Yeah, if Mark happens to not have traveled and one of us happens to Have traveled coincidentally. That's the only shot we've got Here we go two spins That's a bonus point for the shortest I've not stood next to him in a minute it could have changed mark Do you contest on Wade's behalf?

I don't know why I asked it like that. Yeah, sorry. Mark is definitely the shortest. If we're allowed to make fun of him as much as we do for that, he gets that point. No questions asked. And spin number two... Oh no. Got the biggest laugh. As we said at the beginning of this episode.

So did we, are we sticking with El Servo got the biggest laugh? Did it get a bigger laugh than Mark's traffic light colors? Cause that was also pretty funny. I mean, if you want to argue against your own self, that's fine, but no, I'll accept it. I accept a Servo. I will say I, what I would throw out as biggest laugh for me was definitely we haven't eaten that blue-ass chili

because we usually pick somewhere else to eat that's true but that's still Wade so that's really stupid that I said that. Anyway, with those points added, Mark is the shortest. Wade got the biggest laugh. Wade, you finished with nine points. Yes! And Mark, you finished with nine points. Oh boy! Oh boy!

Oh boy! The one man show. What percentage are we supposed to be at for this? It's gonna be 12 I think. It's gonna be 12 though, yeah. Okay good. I'm sure this will be fine for me. And here we go. Oh no!

Okay, okay! Alright! I know, I was really clenched up there for a second. Oh no! Okay, okay. Alright. I know, I was really clenched up there for a second. Mark wins! That's me baby! And the next one man show wheel spin will be 14%. We're really climbing up there.

What's 1 in 6? 16? 17%? What's that? 1 in 5 is 20%. I know that. I don't know what 1 in 6 is. Because I'm too stupid at math. It might be 1 in 6, I think. I survived! And Mark wins. Congratulations, Mark. And no one accidentally said the un-f-word. Un-fucked? No, he said it. Flip the coin, see who gets fucked.

(*laughter*) Anyway, congratulations, Mark. Wade, you lose. Talk about that. Look, I tried to confine my ideas to Cincinnati favorites, Cincinnati locations, but it turns out the thing that I think pushed everything over the edge was Cracker Barrel is great. Love Cracker Barrel. Not Cincinnati Exclusive, but we do have one and it's always been very good. So shout out to Cracker Barrel for really just putting me in the ground today. I don't want to be that guy, but if you're talking Cincinnati Exclusive, Skyline is not either. It at least originated here and is mostly confined to here. I don't even know if that's accurate. There are definitely multiple Skylines in Columbus.

That's still Cincinnati. Columbus is anything, it's Cleveland. You deserve better than that. No, we don't. Mark, you win. Congratulations. Thank you. I feel like I did.

Cincinnati had to service. Me winning this episode is a shock, not only to me, but everyone in Cincinnati. As the one not in Cincinnati winning this episode about tour guide of Cincinnati I feel like fate it runs in strange ways Maybe this is gonna compel me to go back to Cincinnati once and for all Probably not just like with since in the school with blue ash chili

I always intend to go there and I just end up going somewhere else It just picked somewhere else to eat just pick somewhere else to eat. Just pick somewhere else to live. That's so crazy how that works out. You're just like, in your moving truck, I'd you right here and you're like, man, Indiana, what a great random place to stop. I keep trying to move back to Ohio, but I just keep picking somewhere else to move.

Anyway, congratulations, Mark. That means you're gonna host the next one. Thank you for listening and or watching. I was gonna try and send a message to the listeners only, but the watchers can hear also, so, um, that's not gonna work. Make sure you follow us on our socials, Markiplier, LordMinion777, and MySkirm. Make sure you follow this podcast. Hit the little plus thingy or checkmark or whatever the hell button it is, cause then you'll get notifications when episodes come out.

Make sure you watch the video version of this podcast, available on Spotify and also on YouTube now. So we heard you, some of you complained about that. A small contingent. We're very interested in that. It's over there. You can go watch it now. There is no merch. I won't get your hopes up. There is no merch and maybe there never will be, but maybe. Thank you so much for watching and listening. My name is Bob, this has been Distractable, and this is the end. Podcast out.