Distractible - How Do You Know?

Episode Date: January 15, 2024

Bob, Mark, and Wade reflect on the times when they instinctively knew what to do. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

So let's be clear. When it comes to shipping internationally, can I provide trade documents electronically? Mm-hmm. The answer is FedEx. Okay. But what about estimating duties and taxes on my shipments? How do I find all the... Also FedEx. Impressive. Is there a regulatory specialist I can ask about? FedEx. Oh. But let's say that... FedEx.

What a... FedEx. Thanks. No more questions. Always your answer for international shipping. FedEx. What? FedEx. Thanks. No more questions. Always your answer for international shipping. FedEx, where now meets next. This episode is brought to you by Tresemme. Want silky smooth hair that's still full of natural movement? The Tresemme Keratin Smooth Weightless Collection is your simple solution.

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Forget it. She complained about her sunburn the whole trip. It's only $14. $14? Now that's a vacation I can get behind. Deals so good, everyone approves. Only at HomeSense. Good evening, gentle listener, and welcome to Distractable. This episode, bustling Bob loves car porn, advises roof hats,

knows his bikes from his motorcycles, and quits music. Waterproof Wade watches Mark mount things, loved and lost the war, and is confused by transubstantiation. Mindful Mark mentions inflatadics, chainsaw art, and shows off his marching powder. From lens erections to inspiring mammoth maulers. Yes! It's time for how do you know now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show

hello and welcome to yet another episode in the podcast that just won't die this is distractible i will be your host for today my name is bob it. It's not funny. We persist, dammit. I'm your host, Bob, and I'm joined as always by my two competitors for today's show, Wade and Mark. Hello. We are still on life support and Humana. That's not what it's called. What's the company that comes to your house

to take care of you? This episode brought to you by Humana. We won't let you die. What's the group that comes? We tell you about in-home... Hospice! Hospice! That's not what hospice is. But, shut up. If you've never seen this show, uh, the

points are made up and they don't matter. It's like that other Drew Carey thing. But I am the host and the judge and I will pick a winner and the winner hosts the next episode. We had some shenanigans during the last episode because Wade felt uneasy for some reason. Wasn't that two episodes ago now? No, but the last one you made us all host because you were all weirded out that you

were hosting. I shared. It was sharing. Sharing is caring. I did it out of love. It seemed like you did it out of like spite fear. I'm the host. I have a topic, but we'll get to that later because we want to do a small talk.

Mark, what's up with lenses? Huh? Any new camera lens stuff? All right. So I got a fun one for you today i want you to see something okay bob pick yourself or wade to describe this for our listeners oh it should definitely be wade wade has good descriptions oh it looks like a button on its side that has a little mini jail cell oh it's uh three metal bars underneath a little small camera with a big lens that he's turning side to side and now his lens is getting erect it's like an accordion getting horny it's like interesting but also kind of terrifying it's bigger than i would have thought

also makes the same sound as an erection as it got bigger. Oh wait, I only described that. You guys heard that. Wade walks into the bedroom. Click. Turns on. Let's get it on in the background. Weep. Weep. Weep. Weep. Weep. Weep. Molly looks over excitedly. I know what that sound means. You know that's a thing. God, that is

totally forgot that that was a thing. No, I'm dead serious. That's a thing. God, that is totally forgot that that was a thing. No, I'm dead serious. That's a thing. There's a surgery that they replace the what's it called? The spongiosum in your penis with an accordion with an inflatable balloon. I watched Grey's Anatomy. I know what you're talking about. So you have to get a blow job to get a blow job.

You have to blow it up. There's a squeezy pump in your ball sack. That was it. I wasn't sure if that was just a joke someone mentioned on top of it or if it was a thing. They give you inflated dick and they put the little squeeze bulb in your sack. So you've got kind of a third testy going on. Dude, that is like having a fidget spinner attached. I would always be messing with that.

He's here quietly in the courtroom. Squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak. Yeah, I would always be messing with that. Is he quietly in the courtroom? Squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak. Yeah, I'd like to get a job. Squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak. Pop! Ah! God. Wade's sitting like taking an exam or something. A silent room.

You just hear... Who's playing with a blood pressure cuff? Anyway, yeah, so this is, they call this an auto bellows. So it's a lens where the main body is not a solid shaft inside of which the lens slides around to make it focus. It's lenses that slide closer and further apart with just some fabric holding them together. Yeah. So basically the idea is that this allows you to customize your focus, right? So it's for macro photography, really.

You can line up something, you put any lens on the front of this, and then you just adjust this until it goes into focus because most lenses have a minimum focus. We discovered that this lens has a really close minimum focus, but not all lenses are like that. So this one is it's from the 70s. It's kind of like if your accordion penis was on crutches. Ow. Expound.

No, 100% correct. Needs no expounding. All right. Thank you. I defer to the judge. Points for correctness. Yeah. So you take the this is actually the lens part and this is just the mount and there's

another equivalent mount on the back of it here. And it's just kind of a cool thing. It actually is useful. It's very useful because if you can put, you get an adapter, you can put whatever lens on this and then suddenly you can turn any lens, most any lens into a macro lens and you can get really close with it. Did you just mount it like that? Yeah.

If you guys want to see Mark mount something live on video watch on spotify oh he's screwing it too his accordion penis just got mounted right in front of us don't crash your car dude camera lenses are very asmr what about lens caps nah you know what i i sold you short wade i'm reevaluating how i treat you on this show after the subreddit's reaction to one of our recent episodes. And I got to say, I did you dirty. Okay. So yes, lens caps. Very good. Very good. You know, subreddit, you guys need to be nicer to Mark and Bob. They can't handle the mountain of criticism that befell them after their complete massacre of my great arguments, which one person's like, Wade had two chances and still fucked it up.

Yeah, no, I like that. I told you guys the subreddit was all for Wade and one of the current most recent posts is that one where they're like, man, Wade really can't argue, can he? Mark and Bob each have one like total on all of Reddit and both of them were that post. Yeah, that's pretty neat, Mark. How obscure is the mount for that? Does is it a sony mount or something like is it no so it's a minolta mount it's known as an sr mount or an md mount um basically so there are plenty of adapters and things for that yeah i got a whole shelf of adapters for every basic thing so how do you

actually use it in practice what do you do with the little prison bars part? Well, this is also an MDSR, Minolta mount, basically. So you put that on the camera. You put this, your lens on here, and you turn your camera on and you go. Okay. So you just attach to a camera and the little bars don't get in the way of attaching. Yeah. The bars are for stability for the mechanism. Yeah.

You can put like a brace, you know, they make like structural supports off of the front of the camera yeah you can you can put like a brace you know they make a like structural supports off the front of the camera if you need it but you know only if you got a really heavy lens on here do you really need it i like the thought of attaching it to nothing and just getting a tripod just having that standalone as it is uh wade what's up with you how's philosophy what even is philosophy man how do i begin to answer how is philosophy when i'm i'm good sorry involuntary involuntary it's not you it's philosophy i am actually finally in the process of car shopping no i don't believe it i don't believe it yeah we went and test drove and now we got like two or three more trips we're gonna make out to look at things before we make a final decision and you've never been to this stage of the process before no we have not we've not got a test drive

i've gone and they've told me they don't have the car i want to see and they're like yeah we'll call you back whenever we get it in and then they don't call me they ghost me but didn't you order one i thought you had a deposit on that car that never showed up without test driving it you mad man no i test drove that but that was so long it doesn't count oh so you just lied in the previous statement no no once you go three years ago it's not it's a whole different time period i also test drove that but that was so long it doesn't count oh so you just lied in the previous statement no no once you go three years ago it's not it's a whole different time period i also test drove before i got my first car but that also doesn't count here but we are in the process here's the problem with trying to buy a car right now we've been asking literally everyone we know for advice i'm like oh what kind of suv you like and everyone has given me a different brand of car

they like and different reasons and the one i'm like high on the next person's like i don't go that way that one's got this problem okay are you willing to talk about specifics because i would love to hear about what cars you're considering you name a seven-seater suv it has been in the discussion i want a seven-seater because we have company visit on did you drive a volvo xq90 i have not yet however a couple people have told me the one which owned one that uh they weren't a huge fan and they didn't recommend it. Was that Tyler? Tyler was one.

I think I told you that I liked that and that I thought that was an interesting one. Literally days after I said that to you in a recording for this, I was watching a Consumer Report something or other, and they were like, oh, what are the top five worst and most expensive cars to own and maintain for at least reliable that one i i appreciate your text follow-up to tell me that because i was like well i knew you were gonna buy it it's uh it's fine it was on the list i was like you know i trust bob maybe we should go look at that i did a little bit of research i was like this doesn't look so good huh and then i just talked to tyler about tyler's like there were

things i loved and there was a lot i hated and it had a lot of problems and i was like this doesn't look so good huh and then i just talked to tyler about tyler's like there were things i loved and there was a lot i hated and it had a lot of problems and i was like oh okay and then i talked to this i who i talked about the other one they were like yeah i would never go with that and i was like okay great so literally i mean that has been the process and i'll be like yeah we're looking at uh the new lexus we're looking at the escalade we're looking at this and someone's like no you don't want that. I don't. Whatever you think. Bob wasn't trying to prank you. He wasn't trying to get you to buy a stinker lemon of a car. That's not what was happening. I just wanted to ride in that. So I wanted a friend to own one because I miss when when Tyler drove one of those. It was a nice car. Either every person we know has been trying to prank me or every person we know just has

subjective tastes in cars and has reasons to dislike other brands other cars and their points are valid wait so what did you actually drive toyota highlander lexus seven-seater whatever it's called x lls 550 or whatever the shit it's called i what's the honda called it might be a pilot yeah pilot and or passport are the seven-seater hondas uh we drove a chevy something or another we drove tahoe uh and or suburban we drove an escalade too because i just i've heard about it i was like okay what makes this car so much more expensive i will say the escalade drove like butter and the features were just but its price is just so expensive and its gas mileage is like 14 miles per gallon it

gets like 1970s era gas mileage which is really funny with the some of the problem with the seven seaters is like when you're looking through the rear view mirror and you're driving something that's like as long as a goddamn limo you can't see anything through the rear wind window they have like a feature on the mirror maybe a lot of cars have this now but i've not had one since 2015 a new one rather you flip a little thing on the rear view mirror and it's just like a camera view of the back and it's like you're it's it's like the closest view of the rear view I've ever had. And it's like, oh, my God, that's so nice.

And it has a camera on the front. So like if it's a big car, it's hard to see like, oh, where's the front of my car? There's a camera like on the front that you can have like where your speedometer is and you can see right where you're pulling up to. And it's like then they have the features. Now, I guess a lot of have the features where someone's like in the next lane over like your side mirrors yell at you. That's not new. I don't know't know well my car didn't have it my my 2012 ford fusion had that that's not a new feature you can forego the car completely okay this is the year of

2024 amphibious apc and you're thinking too far out when the oceans rise and we're all underwater Then you'll need that But right now E-bike Yeah Just train a bunch of kiddie trailers onto an e-bike You can have as many seats as you want Let me think of the reason we're looking at SUVs Snow and ice Lots of passengers

I'm about to show you what the e-bike is going to solve and how I hope you show me a bike that has like eight side cars Yes Does that hold one passenger what do you mean one why are you both thinking it holds one wait what are you looking at one additional passenger is i think what he meant no bob you were right it's a train yes no see that's what i was hoping it you can continue to add more seats in a row. You know, I was on a jet ski with Molly years back

and we both leaned left at the same time. We fell in the lake. What happens on this bike? Jet skis don't have the gyroscopic procession effects of many, many spinning wheels. Again, centripetal force and gyroscopic progression. I said that progression, you know, these things, these things, there's things, Wade.

I don't care what that smooth brained moron over at Veritasium says. Bikes work by spinning wheels real good. A hundred percent. What about when it's cold and snowy, icy, rainy? Jacket, gloves, a hat. Thanks.

You know, Mark, I got to say this is the one recommendation i haven't gotten yet for suv oh that's that's the little parky metal i thought it had pedals i was like oh wow so you pedal too no yeah no it has pedals what's what's the e on it then do you not know how e-bikes work no i've not had i had a mountain bike until i was like 28. Okay. It's an E bike and not an E motorcycle, specifically because it does have pedals. If it's just an electric motorized two wheel vehicle that has no pedals and just foot pegs, that is not an E bike. That is an E motorcycle.

On most E bikes, when you pedal, it will assist you with the motor. So you can pretend like you're pedaling and going 30 miles an hour even though you're just you're just moving your legs and the bike is making you go 30 miles an hour but also you don't have to pedal because it's more fun and less exercise that way no have you never been on an e-bike when i own an e-bike you should come over it it's it's very dangerous but fun when you don't understand how it works well it's really rainy the chance of maybe some like snow or ice today why don't you bring it over you do you not own a waterproof coat i shouldn't have asked i shouldn't have asked he does not he does he does not is everything you own his hand-me-down stuff no hair and a hand-me-down gloves you must be a

weighty we've solved wade's car problem wait you know what you're a conundrum about picking which vehicle you should buy and all that stuff you were talking about it brings up an interesting question by which i mean it brings up my question that i want the topic of today's episode to be about how do you know how do you know something is the right choice how do you know how you feel about something how How do you know what you're doing isn't completely insane? How do you know? There are three basic ways that you can know something, right? Empirically, you can test it using science. You can observe whatever, an experiment. You can know something creatively because you know that it's a thing because you invented it

or thought of it or whatever. You can know something because you rationally figure it out. You think through a problem and you think, okay, well, this must be because I know this information. So this follows off of what I know. I mean, those are straightforward answers, but I think you can break it down further. I also think there's another answer that exists, but it's like kind of a cheesy answer and the fact that you don't know it's like you kind of fake it till you make it kind of answer like you really don't know but it's you're

taking a stab at it based on what you think or what you feel which i guess falls into one of those categories but the truth of the matter is you just don't know yeah i i kind of agree with that because as an offshoot of it it's it's also my philosophy that being right is largely a matter of perspective. What is being right? Yes. Yeah, exactly. It's kind of the thing where rightness isn't something that the universe really cares about. There is what happens. And I feel like people get caught up in the decision-making of what is right. And I think we can get into the specific scenarios down the road. But when it comes down to making decisions, it's more important just to do something and then have an answer of whether that was right for your specific situation after you did it.

Right. So many times with ADHD, I find myself impulsively jumping into hobby after hobby. Hence why I'm surrounded by lenses and why I'm juggling these hard drives. These hard drives, actually, speaking of, to go back to an old hobby, these are against everything that I believe in. Why? Because they have a proprietary connector that only works with the ecosystem that these come with. They don't plug into anything except the things that you get, but they were crazy on sale because everyone hated them and no one was buying them. So I was like, well, if they're that cheap, that's two terabytes

is still two terabytes. I don't care if like it's there. So I just wanted to see like it's it's in a weird way. It's the wrong answer for what I need. But it was such a freaking deal. I got two terabytes for eighty nine bucks. They have like an external housing or something. You just connected. Yeah. So it's like it comes with a proprietary.

I don't even have the dock yet. That's coming separately. I had to find it. This was just this deal. So I don't have the dock. So I can't use I can't even have the dock yet. That's coming separately. I had to find it. This was just this deal. So I don't have the dock. So I can't use, I can't use them. And so this is in every way the wrong answer, but it was such a steal.

I couldn't turn it down. So there's a spectrum of correctness then. There's like right down to like, I can make this work down to not really down to no. It's like a speedometer of right. I love the huge gray area of I can make this work. Because in there is so much potential. When you're waffling going back from side to side, if you just make a decision, you're

going to land, your chances of landing, maybe the right is like a very small. If you have a big wheel spinner. We know wheel spinners, right? Exactly. Like eight out of the ten are gray. I can make it work. One is very wrong. And maybe two is very wrong, but whatever, add it up to 10, whatever you want. And these right now are sitting in the not real, very close to being wrong. But in that space of, I can make it work is learning. You can find out more things. You can discover new things discover new things you can uh like this can lead you to other things so many things that i've done in terms of anything in my life and career uh it

has been the wrong-ish answer but it led me to discover something that was the right answer so yeah or at least right for me we're still debating on what that is so how do you know like yeah it's like what was wade was saying is like yeah i kind of don't it also depends on what that is so how do you know like yeah it's like what was wade was saying is like yeah i kind of don't it also depends on what the question is if the question is something like a hard drive versus like a spouse versus like the medicine you need to save your life there gets to be less and less of that great like it really depends on the question that you're asking that about too uh so if we're asking in general i think there's like okay going back to bob's thing i guess your gut reaction like sometimes we trust our guts if we don't have time to do research

It's like we come to a path in the woods It's a chainsaw man chasing after us we go left or right one leads to safety one will lead to the certain death My gut says go this way. It's like how did you know? It's also like how did you know one would lead to safety at all or one would lead to certain death signs? would lead to certain death. There's signs. There's big signs saying, what are these?

It's safe. What are the signs written in? Blood? Does it look like the chainsaw man carved into the trees? Like, this way. Thumbs up. Either that or like a coppery colored paint. I don't know.

Copper paint? Someone just carrying around buckets of copper. There's red paint, okay? Maybe it's the best option available at the time maybe you don't know but you're only presented with a handful of things to choose from so maybe it still ends up being wrong but at the time it was the least wrong all this is boiling down to i can predict the end of this episode it's boiling down to the lens cap of fairness so okay that's another that's another answer a spiritual or religious one the lens cap

is our god here at distractible so maybe you feel like something divine has guided you to a decision there's nothing more confusing than as a kid like i didn't go to church very often as a kid but i do remember going and being told like this is the blood of christ and i was like i don't am i sure you want me to drink that like it's a confusing thing to be told whenever it's like this is blood like vampires no there there really is there's very little more metal than like the true i think it's mostly just catholics that truly believe that it's really blood and flesh but are you saying catholics are handed a cracker and they believe that it's skin that is i believe that is um how that works yes and it's in in a lot of protestant like religions it may be viewed more as metaphorical right this is in in catholicism i think this might be incorrect

i'm not a scholar but i think literally the official stance is and when it is blessed and then given as communion it is the body of Christ and the blood. Like it is. It just it actually is. I forgot to silence my phone. Mark, do you hear like a choo choo train or something in the background? Is that what it was before? I just never have my phone off silent.

So I never know what it sounds like. Your house is shaking. You're choo choo. Man, what is that? Oh, my phone was on vibrate too. Anyway, sorry if we angered you Catholics because I'm pretty sure that's correct. What I was going to say is

it's from a bird's eye perspective. There's nothing more metal than that. You go every Sunday to a ritual where you drink blood and eat flesh. It's, it's pagan as fuck and it's awesome. Navigating adulting isn't always easy. You're not just working,

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do what life throws your way and smell like you didn't. Find Secret at your nearest walmart or shoppers drug mart today what were we talking about how do you know i guess a follow-up on this and this is like rhetorically a stupid question because i i'm asking it out of curiosity what your answer is not because i think you have a different answer necessarily but why don't you just change your mind every time you learn new But why don't you just change your mind? Every time you learn new information, why don't we just change our minds? How do we still know?

Do we still know that we're right? Or do we decide that we're right despite the new information because we've already committed to something and we're like, I'm not changing. Is that thinking that you're right? Or is that ignoring that you're wrong? This is actually a part of neuroscience that I'm not an expert in, and I can't for sure quote it perfectly. But to simplify it, you can think of it like a left brain, right brain kind of thing where one side of the brain is responsible for maintaining the self of

identity or the self identity. It has the perspective. And this is such an oversimplification, so please do not take this as truth, but one side is responsible for maintaining the ideas that you have and the beliefs that you have, and the other side is open to new ideas, right? And so when you get new information, one side checks with the other side to check how it balances to what you know. And for different people, one side is stronger than the other side. And so some people are more naturally predisposed to maintaining their core beliefs and rejecting new information. And some people are more balanced towards taking in new information and adapting it to the other side. And so these two, again, simplification, the yin and yang of the mind is a constant balance where this new side is responsible for taking in. And then you argue internally and then one side has to win. And being in that crisis state of beliefs

is what causes a lot of anxiety for people and the dissonance inside your mind, yada, yada. This is getting beyond what i know but that's that's a part of the study of the human mind right now and how it works it's not the same as the dual mind hypothesis of the two the bicameral mind and whatnot um but it's like that that is that is an interesting part of it like what separates the self from new information and like the art what goes on when an argument challenges what you know. So biological reasons are what you're going with is like it's a biological thing that we are inclined to stick with our choices. We are the simplest matter is we are just biological, like we're neurons firing inside of a skull.

But I don't know how that expands to there's so many other different avenues of take. know how that expands to there's so many other different avenues it take but it is just all i'm saying is like it is a study and there is some preliminary research to showcase that there is a core self and in part that's open to new information and there is an argument process some people are weighted more towards one side i also think it depends again on the question because if you have a spectrum of right to wrong and there's like that gray area in the middle i mean maybe it's not you're not wrong enough to be worth the effort it would take to change it. Or maybe you can't change it.

Like you're on the fence about having kids. You have a kid. You're like, man, I wish I hadn't had a kid. It's like, well, too late. You have a kid. Get married. You're like, oh, this is the wrong person. But it's, you know, do you divorce?

Do you deal with like, there's a whole can of things to open when it comes to something like that. You make a car purchase and it's like, it's not so easy to change because let's say you bought a new car. You didn't. You already lost all this value off the top once you bought it or you bought it and it's now more used and worth. I don't know.

Ultimately, you're losing money by getting rid of it. It's like, well, it was the wrong car choice, but now I'm here and I don't want to lose more money. So I'm just going to deal with it. We striking a nerve, Wade. You're right. It's you. You don't have to buy a car if you don't want to i'm just thinking it through man

i'll make a choice you know what doesn't lose value you know what doesn't e but oh your mom you're right you're right wade you're right i should call her but also lenses right up there with my mom. These bad boys, if you take care of them, aren't going to lose a dime. Mark's hierarchy of value. Mom and lenses at the top. Skip a few rows. Everything else.

Don't tell mom, but it's actually lenses, mom, certified deposits, everything else. Oh, and don't forget the e-bike. The e-bikeikes up there god i love cds did you guys see where a phone fell out of like a plane and was still usable after it landed i did see that bob did you see that i didn't was it taking video no unfortunately there was a plane that like something went wrong and like a hole ripped in it or something like it opened up while they were flying and someone's phone went out and they managed to find the phone and it was still working after falling like i forget how many thousands of feet it folds it fell 16 000 feet the email that they were reading was still open

are you talking about the the boeing max uh max 9 where the the plug door blew out yeah who i bet it's all the case manufacturers are scrambling to find out what case that was because they're like it wasn't ours please tell if it was ours what they did was they found their high school physics project and they surrounded the phone in peanut butter and then put marshmallows around the edge and then put it in a box ethan is that ethan's phone yeah mark you should definitely ship your lenses in peanut butter nothing suspicious about that to the uh to the carriers well i do worry about that i have shipped some lenses already um and i put in these silica gel packs and i know that's common for like all shipment around the world yeah i think i think people know what desiccant packs

are but the ones i bought was because i was trying to ship it and last minute i so i i got instacart uh to get some from some storage store i felt terrible because I don't even know why it let me do this, but I ordered these like silica packets and it picked a store that was an hour and a half away and someone drove an hour and a half to give me them. I tipped them so much. I felt so bad. I didn't realize till later, but the silica packets I got do not look like the normal ones. It's a big unmarked plastic bag.

Well, you should call and have that guy return them but it is literally a big i can go get it hang on it's worth you seeing because you'll see what no i think hold on i'll be right back is he rolling out his chain why is he walking like that Is he rolling out of his chair? Why is he walking like that? Is that drugs?

Is that one? This is one. Oh. So I got three, right? Because it was a three pack. This looks so suspicious. Is it powder? Wait, why does it look like crystal meth?

No, that's the thing, right? It's silica gels, I think, in here. So what you do is you ship the lens in a briefcase with those. I mean, basically, that's what that looks... This is a lens case. It's basically a briefcase. Maybe put a straight blade in there with it. For those listening, it's a white bag, like a kind of like a paper thing with like what looks like

a semi-powdery crystal substance in a plastic bag that is supposed to keep things dry. How did I know they were going to arrive safely? That was another thing I just had to bite the bullet. Bite the bullet? Where does that expression come from? Back in the day, in order to prepare rounds of ammunition, they actually had to put like part of the bullet in their mouth and then like jam something in order to stick it together and that way they could load it up and shoot it i believe that i know the actual answer during the civil war uh severely injured soldiers on the battlefield would have to have infield amputations and they would take lead shot because it was little lead balls right where the bullets back of it and the nurses or whoever in the field would give them

a bullet and be like bite down on this, this is gonna hurt and so you bite the bullet because you're about to do something that's gonna really suck I believe that, 100% in the revolutionary war, they would take arrows snap them in half and they'd call them like little mini arrows, but they were like what do we call this, it's like, kind of like a bull's horns

because of the tips of the arrow, they're like just bite this bull lip, it's like a little bull they'd put it in their mouth bite down on it from battlefield medications during the french revolution cavalry riders would frequently fall off of their horses on muddy battlefields and uh the the french word for painkillers was actually boulet. And so the French nurses would run around to the fallen cavalry riders and be like, bite the boulet. And then English people were like, bullet? Bite the bullet? And that's where that comes from.

How did Mark become the host? What's happening? Points all around. How did you know Mark was the host i mean didn't you know didn't we all just suddenly realize mark was the host even though it was completely unspoken uh no so i guess the the other question i had around my original topic is can you think of a decision like in a what could be an important life decision it could be an important turning point in a specific thing or whatever the for me, and I've told the story, for me, the decision to drop out of music school and change my degree in college, I was in music school for a whole year, like a year and a quarter, basically. And the whole time I was really struggling. I didn't do that well. Like I enjoyed it, but it was really difficult.

And it literally, I didn't know, I didn't realize that I probably should switch what I was doing until the moment. And it wasn't during the conversation, but it was, I talked about the story. There was a moment where I went for a lesson and my professor was like, yeah, we're not going to play tuba, right? Let's go get some, let's go get some lunch. You want to, I'll take you out for lunch. When he said that, and I knew that we were about to have a discussion about that, I feel

like, and maybe this is rewriting my own history right but i feel like now my the way i remember it in that exact moment i was just like oh shit oh i know what i should do i shouldn't this isn't you know i need to switch my major this isn't what i should be doing i couldn't tell you why and that might not be how it was in real time maybe it was but like you know do you have do you why. And that might not be how it was in real time. Maybe it was, but like, you know, do you have, do you guys have decisions that felt like that where something triggered, something happened,

something switched. And you went from maybe not even realizing, cause I wasn't even thinking about, should I Twitch? And I went from not even asking myself the question to immediately, like, I know the answer. I know what I should do.

Wait, do you remember the conversation way back when, like a few months into me doing youtube on the balcony we talked about it before but it's like that was that was a situation where it's like where it's like i just gotten demonetized and you know i was like man it's so hard to get back up like i don't and i don't even know if all this is worth it like i don't know if it's gonna go anywhere and i think you convinced me just being like, it's it's it is it's worth it. And, you know, it's it's it is one of those things where you don't know.

But sometimes just talking with friends is all you really need. You need that conversation needs to occur to really kind of get it out. Even if you're even if, you know, you're talking to someone that doesn't fully know the situation or like doesn't know. And I'm saying you didn't wait, but just getting it out of your head, saying it saying it out loud even if it's to yourself can help you contextualize it and have that conversation we had two different conversations the one on the balcony was whenever you were first starting and um there weren't a lot of people that were supportive of you trying it but then i think later on there was another conversation after your first channel got demonetized which was not that was after the balcony it was a different conversation whenever you'd lost your first channel because the first time you talked to me about it was

whenever you were first starting off and you were just telling me about what you were doing it sounded genuinely interesting to me because after my breakup i was watching youtube videos to help kind of just survive the depressed period afterward and i was like oh that's awesome because i'm actually getting a lot of support by watching youtube videos right now so i was supportive of your endeavor at that point but later on whenever your channel got demonetized and you kind of came to me and you were like do i give it up do i you know start over what do i do here and i don't know if i i mean i think i told you i would start over but i think you probably already knew that's what you were going to do i think you were just looking for

affirmations that was the right thing you were trying to make sure that was the right decision but those were two different conversations but i mean similar effect either way on my end i had completely forgotten about this until you brought up the tuba thing again, Bob. But I was pretty sure from like junior high. In fact, I was 100% sure in junior high and high school that I wanted to be a lawyer. Like I knew that's what I wanted to do. I wanted to be like a judge, Supreme Court justice, maybe even one day if that was possible for a state or, you know, US, whatever. I had this naive belief that the judicial system was truly nonpolitical. Like I was like, you know, it's weird that the judicial system was truly non-political like i was like you know it's weird that the president appoints justices but like i'm sure they can't be political like

they can't lean one way or another they they're gonna be judges they can't have bias so like i steered as far away from politics as i could throughout junior high and high school everyone was debating you know al gore george bush or you know whoever whatever and it was like not even gonna get into it i want to be a judge one day. I got to stay away from all that. Whatever I think has to be separate from this. When were you in high school? Al Gore, George Bush. Wait a minute. I feel like that was, that was earlier on, but like, I feel like that discussion, who did Bush run against the second time? Uh, does it matter? It didn't really matter to us back then because we couldn't vote or anything anyway,

but I try to stay clear of politics. I'm thinking that that's what I had to do to become a judge. And I did mock trials and stuff in high school that I thought was really fun and exciting. I went to different forums. My mom helped pay for me to go places that she couldn't afford to send me, but she did anyway because she wanted to see me pursue my passion. I got to college and I went to Miami University for a little bit before I switched to UC. And at Miami University, they had a mock trial program. And there were people I'd known from some of the forums I'd done that were part of it. And I was super excited.

I knew people. I knew I would love it. I was excited. I went to the first meeting and I was super amped. I was like, finally, I get to go do some real mock trial stuff. This is gonna be really fun. And after the first meeting, everything went very well. There's nothing that went wrong.

I was excited. And I got home and I was like, everything went well. And yet I feel less enthusiastic about it. And that was like the first shaky time I'd ever had with anything law related because I'd always been super passionate and nothing happened to change my mind. It was just, I went to the meeting and it was like, this wasn't as exciting as I thought it would be. It just didn't quite live up to the hype of what I expected. And then like throughout college, I was like, whatever, I'll'll shake it off i switched majors from political science to philosophy went to uc and i got my degree i took my lsat and i knew like each year it's like i got

further and further away from that wanting to be what i what i did after i took my lsat which i scored well on i don't remember what i got at this point but but I think it was 160s. Is that a good thing? Yeah, I think it's 170 or 180. So like anything 160 and up is pretty good. I just kind of lost my passion for it. That for some reason, that mock trial meeting, which again, didn't even go poorly, just started the like, I don't know if this is right. But what do you know? It was wrong.

Is there a turning point? Whenever I got my LSAT score back and it was good, and then I had no motivation to apply to law schools. Or was that the right answer? And there's another universe where Wade is on the way to becoming a Supreme Court justice. People look at that guy and they're like, he's 34, he looks 25. Instead of going to get my haircut and my Russian barber telling me she thought I was in my mid 40s. She was so bluntly honest. She was sweet as can be, but so bluntly honest.

And she's like, I'm in my low 40s. I thought you were older than me. And I was like, I'm not. Damn, you're missing out when going on private jets, flying to your buddy's big mansions on the coast for free vacations that you don't have to report to anybody that are not gonna affect how you feel about any cases you might hear

do what she told me she told me because of my genetics she's like you should avoid having any i swear to god she told me avoid having any asian friends because they will make me look even older and i was like god damn it damn shit god oh fucking korean jeans making me look like shit that's very specific but uh cuttingly honest you know well she was born in russia and i guess she a lot of her friends are from like she's a lot of friends from like the asia region and she's like they make me look even older than i am and i was like i got one too whoa what are you listening to this for wait who's talking you know you're driving a 2024 I got one too. Whoa, what are you listening to this for?

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Keep it fresh at michigan.org 2023 was the year of people coming to my streams or posting on youtube they're like oh man i remember watching you when i was in elementary school i just retired and wade you look so old this is so sad to see i loved watching you when you were young look if they were an infant when they started watching you and then they just retired, I think you would look great for the literal age you should be. You look young, dude. For a man of your age, you look like you couldn't be a day over 43.

We're the same age, you assholes. You gotta stop saying things like, when I was in high school when Bush was facing off against Gore, you gotta stop saying things like that. I can't remember! Okay, you know what? Who did Bush? No, not enter yet. Who did Bush? Who Bush run against 2004?

Oh, it was John Kerry. John Kerry's a Democrat. We're idiots, Mark. You know what? I feel okay not knowing that because I tried to avoid being political back then. So I'm going to say, man, I did such a good job. I didn't even know who the Democratic nominee was. Can I just ask, did you, was it the circles that you traveled or something, Wade?

Were your friends in high school really like talking a lot of politics? No. Okay. Cause I was aware of politics a little bit, but I, all my friends in high school could have fucking cared less about anything that was happening in politics we just like you know played halo in each other's basements and we had a few i don't know mark if you remember but we had a few people in our class that were very political oh yeah yeah so we had some very outspoken people on both sides of political spectrum at our school um And my family did too. So like trying to avoid politics was tough.

Plus with the name George W, kind of hard for me to avoid being talked to about politics. Ha ha. That reminds me of like when I was, and no disparagement to this girl that I did. But it was, it's not even a thing where I was like you, Bob. I didn't know a damn thing about politics. I barely had an opinion to myself,

but then again, I was a teenager. So I didn't really have any damn thing about politics. I barely had an opinion to myself, but then again, I was a teenager. Uh, so I didn't really have any strong stance about anything. And I remember there was like this politics or government class or whatever it was. I think it was government and people were told to stand up in a semi-circle depending on the question of, do you think George Bush is doing a good job or a bad job as president? There were people that were slammed all over on the bad job side. Uh, the girl I was dating included. And then, you know, there was a couple people over on the good job side and most people were just in the middle of just being like, um, and then after that, I think it sparked a discussion between me and this girl. And she was

like, you don't really think that George W. Bush is doing a good job. Do you? And I was like, well, I was in the middle i i don't know i'd have to meet him before i knew that's what i said i remember i'd have to meet them all yeah and just like i remember that was just like a big oh no like like uh that made me feel terrible because as as a kid i was just like oh man is there something wrong with me i don't know but it's like no who knows except for like, oh, man, is there something wrong with me? I don't know. But it's like, no, who knows? Except for like the new generation. Now, of course, there's much more involved in the political and world spheres.

This is an aside to everything else we've talked about. I can't tell if it's good or bad that I am not interested in public political debate. Recently, I watched Oppenheimer, which I hadn't seen yet. watched Oppenheimer, which I hadn't seen yet. And in the, one of the things in that movie, aside from the science stuff is, is taking place at a time when communism is like a big issue. Uh, and there, and part of the movie is very like, people are getting together at a house, like at a house party to just talk about politics. Like they're just hanging out, chatting about politics and they're talking about like communistic ideas and that used to be like a part of society was it is it is that the past equivalent of how people get on social media today and just scream at each other about politics because all of that sounds just awful to me and

not to say that i don't hold beliefs i do think things i have beliefs i do think about politics and about when i have to vote who i'm'm voting for, that sort of stuff. But I have just minimal interest in like debating other people about it. Is that good or bad? I end up getting in trouble with everybody because whenever I hear people discussing politics, typically what gets me involved is not what side they're on necessarily, but it's whenever they say something as a fact that's not, or they say something that's just like philosophically untrue, or they make claims like this and it's like well actually there's more layers to it it's not that simple i get involved whenever people are just like stating something

they've heard clearly from like a news outlet and they just splash it out like it's a fact and it's like okay it's a little bit more nuanced than that we gotta if you want to deep dive into like the breakdown of how this stuff's sorted out and like just, I'm interested in the philosophical side of even politics and it never gets me any brownie points with anybody. Weird that no one likes that. I don't think anybody likes to argue a justified confrontation. I'm all about, I am ready for it. And it's just part of this. I think that if if you if it is a discussion it shouldn't even approach argument there's so much common ground between people uh that there it should almost always be a civil conversation but the problem is some people don't want a civil conversation some

people just start itching for a fight they they just really want to get into that fight because they they like it. It feels good. They get dopamine from it. And I'm not saying that's entirely inherently wrong because it depends on what you're fighting for, but it's a fine line, right? You can't let people shout without restraint because like complete tolerance, even of intolerance, leads to so many problems. But it's like moral responsibility of the individual. That's a completely different subject matter. But some people are just itching for a fight.

The problem is when people disagree, they never actually get to the point that they disagree about. They get to like subtopic be like if they're debating, I don't know, gun control or abortion or one of the hot button things. They get to like one thing where they're like, you're killing babies, you're taking away women's rights. And they'll just stop there and start name calling getting mean instead of boiling it down further to what is life? What is right? Like I know it sounds cliche and philosophical to get to, but it's an interesting question if people ever actually get to it and debate it. The problem is, is whenever someone doesn't get there, like someone doesn't listen to you and change their mind and be able to believe what you're saying

after a certain point, it feels like instead of continuing to deep dive and figure out where the disagreement actually is, it becomes, you're fucking stupid, you heartless monster. No, you're stupid, you evil.

It becomes that. That's where political discussion becomes like this because people don't actually debate the issue. They get one layer down and they're like, oh, you're stupid. You're evil.

And it's like, just dive a little bit deeper. Get to the crux of it. I have a big statement that's going to be controversial. Who's ready for it? Yes. Distractible stands behind you. I'm willing to stand. All of us here are here to say some people are not qualified to make the argument they are arguing.

I'd go a step further and say most people aren't qualified. I would say a lot of people. All people are not qualified to argue. I'm not qualified for half the shit I debate. There's a few ellipses and then a yet at the end of that, because you can get to the point where you are qualified, but not many people even know where that line is and this applies to pretty much anything that can be argued there is

in all cases the peak of mount stupid and the valley of ignorance and the long climb to uh knowledge and most of us stand on the peak of mount stupid and are willing to shout from there because it's the highest point you can get to the quickest. So a lot of the arguments is made from those perspectives and people making these arguments don't know enough to be in the argument in the first place. Well, I think it comes down to like people are raised right, like parents and friends and stuff give a certain influence and you kind of like adapt a lot of times the same opinion to those around you, especially if you are close to them and you're like-minded and news sources stuff like that like they'll give a very shallow explanation of like sides they'll explain like

very basically what things are so no one is ever really taught like again for me i was very egotistical i i thought of myself as being like king fucking tut in high school like i was like dude i'm like the smartest fucking person i know everyone around me is so stupid why was that what king tut was known being the smartest i don't know man i'm speaking from ignorance here just let me go with it i thought of myself as king fucking kong smartest man on the outside of the empire state building king kong number one physicist but i swear to you philosophy was the most humbling thing I ever did in my life was taking philosophy classes and learning how little I knew and how to find out what kind of questions to ask to get deeper to figure out how to get anywhere close to an answer

but people hear the word philosophy they're like oh god what is life okay who cares there's that reaction to it where it's like the eye roll but it truly is a way to look at even some big hot button issues and actually get deeper to figure out where the disagreement lies rather than everybody just being like this that and no no no bob don't that no no no bob i have one more i have one more okay okay okay so on the on the side, there's always this question of like, can someone fight a bear and win? A grizzly bear, right? Oh, it's possible. It's possible, right?

Now here's the thing, because I'm all about like, yeah, a lot of people speak from ignorance. They don't know what they're arguing. But we, as a species, need that guy or that girl who is full chested. I can take on a grizzly bear. And here's why we need that guy or that girl who is full chested. I can take on a grizzly bear. And here's why we need that. It's because go back in history to when mammoths were walking around mammoths, even bigger, probably more dangerous than grizzly bears. But at some point you needed someone to look at that mammoth, the gigantic beast and go, I bet I can kill that. You need that. You need that as a species. You need that confidence because it's not about whether that

one person can do it because very likely they can't alone. But that that confidence is inspiring. And that is like the fundamental basis of leadership is making people believe in things that they they they don't believe they can do, causing people to set their sights a little bit higher than what they were expecting. And by constantly maintaining the like, oh, I don't know enough about anything will leave you in a place of indecision. I've done many things in my life that are not equivalent to fighting a mammoth or a grizzly bear.

But I often say things that I can do that I'm not sure that I can do. But I need to believe in myself because I need to be able to know that there's a mountain that is not going to scare me. And I need to go in with confidence because I need to be in that gray area of I'll figure it out. I guess I'll figure out how to kill this grizzly bear because it is inspiring. And that is an important quality in humanity. I'll take it one step further. We need to support that guy.

We need to give that guy a spear, have him go at the mammoth, so that while he's being impaled to death, the rest of us can escape. Exactly. No, absolutely. Because at the bare minimum, you just got a spear.

You may, it progressed the argument, right? It's just like, okay, you think you can? All right, buddy. We're going to try to make sure that you can have it, but I'm not going in there. Even that's a little support. Even that causes action to spill over. Fight your mammoth and then you'll know if it kills you, you couldn't have done it. And so it doesn't matter that you're dead because you were wrong.

That's the powerful conclusion of this episode. I mean, it depends on your perspective. It's like a lens. No. Okay. Listen, I have in my head the person that I think won this episode. And it's honestly very close. And I will just, if you guys want me to, I will just say who I think the winner is.

And we can call it that. Well, before you say, how do you know? I don't know. I'm just going to say it anyway. But what I was going to say is if you would like to, if one of you wants to host the next episode, I'm open to negotiation. If one of you wants the other one to win, try and claim it for yourself. I'm open.

If you will buy me a car, I will let you give Mark the win. Pass. Pass on that one. That's a no for me, Doug. I think that what this boils down to is not only will I graciously accept the win with humility, I will give an incredible winner speech thankingade for his competitiveness and then also i will host the greatest episode of distractible that we have ever had in the very next episode wait are you interested enough as i am to maybe just go ahead with that and see what happens you know what is

winning is winning really just being handed the participation trophy being able to host or is winning coming out with more knowledge than you went in with despite the outcome of the event winning is when you win the episode mark i'm not going to commit to anything i want to i want to test give the winner's speech and we'll see how it turns out life is a journey a long journey with tough decisions facing you every step of your life you're going to face another decision another path could split off into another universe where possibilities are endless. It is up to you to dive headfirst into that darkness of uncertainty and feel out with eyes closed where your destiny lies. And in the same way, I went through this episode not knowing where my future lied, but I believed in myself and I believed that my opponents were going to be

extremely competitive. And Wade put up an incredible fight. And the fourth member of this podcast, the who shall remain unnamed, is always lurking in the darkness, ready to strike and take victory from our jaws. But thankfully, the fourth member did not strike. And Wade, although he fought bravely, as intensely as he ever does, and he deserves all the credit in the world, he made a few more mistakes than me. And he deserves all the credit in the world. He made a few more mistakes than me. And that's all life is. You make as few mistakes as you can,

and you hope and believe in yourself enough that you can see yourself through to the other side. And here I stand, the victor. Uh, here's, can I give my winner's speech? If you want to. Trying is making mistakes, and making mistakes is learning. That being said, life is a highway. I want to ride it all night long. If you're going my way, well, I want to drive it all night long.

I have to say, you had me in the first half. I was really hoping you were just go, life is mistakes and mistakes are learning. And learning is books and books are made paper. They just go on and on. And when you didn't do that for like half a second, my brain was like, oh no. But then you gave an even better speech than I could have imagined. I don't know where you came up with that pure poetry,

but that might be the most beautiful sentiment I've ever heard. I like to call that poem Rascal Flat. I wish that I could hear that every day of my life while a red race car drives around a cartoon animated track over and over and over again. Well, perhaps my son, if I'm lucky to have an own son someday, watches it because his literal favorite movie in the world is Cars. And the only scene he likes is the one where Life is a Highway plays. For hours and hours of my life.

And because I didn't know when I let you both give your speeches, but now I know for a fact who the winner is, I do have to say congratulations, Wade. This was a come from behind victory that I couldn't have possibly foreseen. When I gave my winner's speech pseudo-sarcastically, I thought, you know, after hearing Mark talk with words, I'm done for. So I'm just going to take someone else's words.

And what I have learned today is that plagiarism is truly the path to victory. Depends what you mean by victory. Okay! Thank you everybody for listening. Wade's winner speech counts as a winner speech. Mark's winner speech now counts as a loser speech. Very gracious loser speech, Mark.

Thank you for watching the video, if you did. Only available on Spotify Podcasts. And, yeah, it's been a great episode. Thank you, competitors, for competiting. Wade will be hosting the next one. My name is MySkirm. Wade is LordMinion777 or Minion777. Mark is Markiplier.

You probably know that already. If you don't, you're welcome because there's lots of good stuff on at least two out of three of those pages. And that's it. Thank you so much, everybody. See you on the next one where hopefully I am really smart and I win because I'm good at things.

Podcast out. This is ridiculous!