Distractible - Kids Are Stupid

Episode Date: August 2, 2021

The guys trade stories about how dumb kids can be: from inventing stupid games, to playing with banned toys, to somehow making it through all of it without a scratch. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Good evening, gentle listener, and welcome to Distractible, a Wood Elf production, with your hosts, Wicked Wade, Marvelous Mark, and Bodacious Bob. This week, the tittering tripartite, elucidate one of life's many conundrums, the existence and acts of Stardust Hedos. To you and I, that's stupid kids. Please prepare for snot bubbles of mirth and enjoy the show. Hello and welcome to Distractible, the podcast where we talk about whatever we want to talk about, whenever we want to talk about it. And, uh, that's not the intro. What are we even talking about? That could be the intro. What's wrong with that intro?

Welcome to SmartList, everyone. Welcome to SmartList. Welcome to literally any other podcast but our podcast here we talk about uh certain subjects of which i will bring the topic up at in a few moments here but um something about points uh i literally have forgotten you're all right man uh jesus christ we talk about uh certain subjects and then we discuss them and these two fine gentlemen that i'm joined with this week maybe not next week we don't know we might have other people rotating in and out oh um are bob and wade how are you guys doing today um well concerned now that's not that's news to me when i'm the host you'll always win from here on out, buddy. No worries. Yeah, same here. Oh, it sounds good. That's 10 points.

Just don't fire me, please. Don't fire me from your podcast, sir. My podcast, you know. Please, please. It's got my name on it, right? Yeah, something like that. If you rearrange the letters of distractible, you'll get...

Trick-dow-bley. Trick-de-bley. Trick-tab-bley. trick doll play trick to play trick tabla which we all know is Mark's actual name trick doll play I be dis rat we know

anyway I'd like to give a shout out to the people that have established the distractible subreddit there's only a few hundred people right there right now but if you are listening to this and want to join the subreddit, you can do so because the people there

are already attempting to be funny, so if you can lend your funniness to them and make us laugh at jokes about the things that we talk about on the podcast, we would greatly appreciate it. We won't link it because you're listening to us on a podcast and we can't link anything and you can't click on it,

so you gotta find it for yourself. Good luck. Do that thing where you spell it really emphatically. Reddit.com slash Lars. fuck reddit.com slash large slash distractible you're mocking of me fell apart at the seams yikes i shouldn't go for it i can't do it i can't do it on purpose when i need to so why am i able to do it then i don't know i don't know man i don't know the subreddit's on reddit right after that one i just heard them yeah it's r slash distractible on reddit oh okay got it okay cool yeah so everyone listening at home go to reddit if you don't know what reddit is probably stay away from it because it'll suck you in and it's pretty much not worth it

i have to burp but it's not burping yourself i can't How? Pat your chest. What do you mean how? It's not working. Harder. It's not working. Harder. It's just making more carbonation appear in my stomach. Harder. How?

What do you mean how? More force. Get some more muscles. Yeah, that'll do it. Oh my god. This is agony. This is the worst intro to an episode we've ever had. You know what you need to do?

You need to jump up and down. That'll help. Jump up and down. Bob, do you think we should stop letting him win after how horrible this has been? Yeah, Mark, this is why you never win, because you can't... Oh god, I feel... I'm gonna throw up. I feel like I'm gonna throw up. Jump up and down and it'll save your life. Or do some somersaults. Do some somersaults. This is terrible advice.

What about a cartwheel? I know you can cartwheel. 13.75ersaults. Do some somersaults. This is terrible advice. What about a cartwheel? I know you can cartwheel. 13.75 jumping jacks. Oh, God. It'll come out eventually. I'm just trying to accelerate the process of it coming out. All right, I'm going to jump up and down, I guess. Have Amy or someone beat you in the back of the broom.

I can't hear you guys because I took out my headphone. Good. I'm excited. Oh, God. Do it. Yes. If we hear him vomit, I might actually have to leave for a minute. It's not helping. It's forcing it down.

Relax. Relax your muscles. Did you relax your muscles while you were doing it? Because that's really... You know what I mean? You need to relax your muscles when you're jumping. Just, you had a deep breath and then jump. Only engage your legs. Let your core flop around like a raggedy doll you're like a fish out of water the top half and the bottom half you're just jumping i'm gonna not do any of that

no i actually feel awful can we fix it i feel 100 terrible all right well we have our fault yeah all right cool anyway uh Anyway, I legitimately feel terrible. Okay. So take two of that intro. All right, take two, yeah. Let's just pick it up from here. This is Distractible, where we talk about conversations. Bob and Wade, would you guys like to know the topic for this week's episode?

Sure. Yeah, usually. All right, so the topic for this week's episode? Sure. Yeah, usually. All right. So the topic is kids are stupid. I really want to touch on ideas and stories from either your childhoods or you witnessing terribly stupid kids because we all know that kids are dumb. My childhood is filled with horribly terrible decisions that I have made as a child and as almost not a child.

What age limit do we have for kids? 11 and below. Okay. Let's get out of teenage years. Just wanted to be clear. No teen, no preteen. 11 and below. It does eliminate a lot of dumb stuff.

Apparently a lot of my dumb behavior was in my teenage years. If you guys need time to think about it, I can do a little mini story that I have from my childhood. Yeah, did you have one that inspired this? Oh yeah, when I was a kid, I've told you guys how stupid I was multiple times, but I'm focusing on the things where I almost killed other people. Cool. Because that is a strangely common thing when you're a child. You just put other children in horribly dangerous situations, or yourself. It's either you're about to die, or some other kid is about to die. So me and my

brother, we like to go into the woods a lot. And one time we go out there with a saw because we saw this vine on this tree that we were going to cut down and we're going to swing on it because we love swinging on vines. And so we get out there and we cut down this vine. We unwrap it from the tree and we tug on it a few times. We're like, yeah, that's sturdy. Yeah, that could definitely hold us up. And this other kid was walking through the woods as well we knew them because you know we we often went in the woods together and there were kids from all the neighborhoods that like just wandered the woods which nowadays seems weird but like that's just such a cherished childhood that i had so this kid came over and what me and my brother saw

was a perfect test subject for the vine and the the problem with this vine, or what made it so great, was that it opened up over this kind of ravine. Or as a kid, it looked like a ravine. Probably now it's just a hill. But it looked like a ravine. And at the bottom of this ravine were just a bunch of thorn bushes. So we talked to this kid over here, and we're like, hey, check out this vine that we just cut.

And I remember the kid asked, oh, did you swing on it already? And me and my brother went yeah of course of course we did your turn go ahead and so uh this kid uh he swung out on the vine and it didn't break it was great and uh he came back and he was like oh that's awesome and we're like oh this is so great it works perfectly everything's good and then he goes again he just gets a running start on it. He goes way back, swings as hard as he can, swings super far out. And, like, at the apex of his swing, the vine snaps and he just plummets right into the thorn bushes.

And we just hear him, like, hit. You know how kids sometimes squeak when they make an impact? Oh, God. I just remember hearing this like a squeaky toy oh no okay we hear him like start crying in the bush because he doesn't know whether to move to get out of it or like because every time he's moving it hurts and to us it looks like he just went into like the jaws of like spinning blades of death. I'm sure that, like, childhood brain made this much more distorted.

He, like, managed to find his way out. Like, he's crying as he's trying to crawl out. And then he just, like, gets out of the bushes. And you see, like, thorns sticking out all over him. He's got, like, little trails of blood running down. He's like, I'm gonna go home now. Like, okay, bye. And so me and my brother thought we were in so much trouble

that we decided to bury the saw because we didn't want anyone thinking that we did it. What the? Like, legitimately, there's a saw buried by a tree in the woods, like, by my childhood home. If anyone finds it it you know what happened there and you can't tell a soul so that's a little mini story the bearing of the saw is a concerning instinct that's a very murdery instinct yeah man i don't know man we're kids we didn't know what to

do we thought we were in trouble best to hide the evidence fair i guess but like damn i think the kid's alive who knows the squeak is a very identifiable thing yeah i'm pretty sure i i did a lot of those squeaks when i was a kid yeah oh not not to dominate this episode but there's actually another there's another simple thing it's a it's a much quicker story go for it yeah so when uh me and my brother were slightly older we were staying over at my mom's apartment, and the apartment complex has a lake outside, and it's the middle of winter, so the lake is kind of frozen over.

Oh, hell yeah. So me and my brother were like testing the edges, and we step out a little bit, and it's holding our weight, and it's holding really well. The only problem is in the center, we definitely see that the center is not frozen, so we stay away from the center.

But over time as we're playing, we get a little closer and a little closer, you know we're sliding around we're having fun throwing snowballs and whatnot and this other kid comes over and he's like hey you guys playing out there and we're like yeah yeah come on it's safe and so he comes out and he's playing and it's fine at first and then you know we're he asks us like if it's safe near the hole in the center. And we're like, yeah, it's good. It's good, man. Definitely good. What the fuck?

So the kid goes near the center. And he doesn't go even close. But he gets kind of close. And he just falls right through. Right? And so me and... It's kind of like the squeaks thing again. Because you just hear him go like...

And then he's down beneath the water. But he comes right back out. Me and my brother do nothing to go near him. He comes back out. And he comes down beneath the water. But he comes right back out. Me and my brother do nothing to go near him. He comes back out, and he comes out of the water. And I know this seems like we're absolutely terrible, but remember we're kids. And he crawls out, and me and my brother are just like, we're looking down at the ground as if the ice is going to break beneath our feet at any moment. Like there's going to be that huge glacial crack in the ice that's going to chase right to our legs,

and then we're going to look at each other and go, and he comes out, and he's just dripping water. And and then uh he's like i'm gonna go home now like in a very it might have been the same kid from the thorn bush i'd like to think this is the same guy every time anything stupid had to happen that kid would come around and you and your brother looked at each other and you were like you know what we have to do and you started digging a child-sized hole and you were like just lay down just lay have to do. And you started digging a child-sized hole. And you were like, just lay down, just lay down. And he was like, oh, okay, I have to go.

I'll just lay down. I'll warm up. And he buried the kid and never went back. I know how it goes. The funniest thing was, like, he walks away. And, like, this guy apparently had been watching us from his balcony. This, like, old man was like, hey, you shouldn't play on the ice. And then we met my brother, and just like, oh, okay.

As you're leaving, you and your brother are just like, oh, thank you. Thank, thanks. You really saved us. Appreciate it. Yeah. God damn it.

So anyway, sorry. Didn't mean to dominate the opening of the episode, but just wanted to give you time to percolate those paint a really those paint a really interesting picture of you and your brother being like those like demons who try and lead other children to their death yeah like you you just you're doing something that looks fun and some kid shows up and like like, hey, hey, is this safe? And you and Tom are just like, yeah, it's safe. Come on. Look, we're doing it.

Here, swing on this vine. It's safe. And then you just stand there watching, just like. Well, I mean, you got to understand, like, me and my brother's childhood was the same thing, but just to each other. Like, it was always the same. That's how we had that how far up the stairs can you jump off contest. That's how I broke my arm

because it was like we were on the monkey bars and there were other kids there. It just so happened to be my day to fall through the ice when it was how far out the monkey bars can you jump and grab a rung.

And I fell and broke my arm. It was just like, you know, every kid takes his turn. You never know who's going to be the one squeaking on the ground when they hit i think i actually never had like a severe injury as a kid and kids are pretty bouncy but like i probably should have but i think i don't think i've ever actually broken a bone in my body never i don't think so i think i might have broken a toe as an adult like a pinky toe or

something but i never broke like a bone or had to wear a cast or anything growing up either i had to get stitches twice but both of those were like freak accidents i think you assume a lot about what all kids do mark no but every kid is dumb and gets in trouble or gets hurt in some way like you know i'm looking for these kinds of stories it doesn't have to be you guys i can. It doesn't have to be you guys. I can think of like a dumb thing my brother did and I can think of like a dumb thing I did, but they weren't like necessarily super dangerous. Well, it doesn't have to be super dangerous. The topic is Kids Are Stupid.

You can get anything if you have your story. I'm ready to hear the titles. I award a thousand points to myself for my incredible story. The problem is they're both really short tales. Like, they're not very long. Sounds like a bunch of excuses. Bob, what do you got? got kind of in the same situation i have a couple stories in mind none of them is like particularly a whole story but i do have a thing about a dirt bike track that i feel like it's promising i think i'm gonna lead with that if you want to just make this a an

entire episode of us sharing stupid stories that are random snippets, because none of my stories are long either. Let's just do that. Probably. I've got Picture Day and The Enemy's Treehouse. And The Enemy's Treehouse? Those are good. Let's just forget the titles.

These stories are so short. I came up with one, but alright. I've got titles. Don't leave me out of the points. I've got The Hurt in the Woods and Yard Darts Should Not Exist. I want to hear Yard Darts because I just have a feeling. Yeah, I can hear Yard Darts too. All right, five points. All right.

All right, let's hear about yard darts all right so i grew up in the same house for basically most of my childhood we moved there when i was like four years old and i grew up in the same neighborhood and so i sort of you know how you get to sort of know the people in your neighborhood most of the guys in my neighborhood were bad were like not good friends to me they were all like football players and basketball players and i was a jock at that point i mean i wasn't really i was always a nerdy little kid but i played sports so i kind of knew them from like football or whatever basketball soccer when i was a kid but so behind my house there's like a cul-de-sac that curved around so basically there's another street behind my house the neighbor directly behind me was a kid in my grade and then across from his house there's another kid that was like a year or two younger than us and they were i don't know if like bullies is completely the right word but

they were essentially like my bullies but also as a kid you can't really go anywhere so they were like the main friends i had to hang out with at that point. So if anyone out there doesn't know what yard darts are, so people our age and older probably do, but I don't know if they exist anymore. There used to be this, it's like a backyard game. It's like cornhole or like that thing where you smack the ball on the little trampoline and it shoots around like crazy. I don't know what it's called. It's like a backyard game, right?

It's meant for like fun, casual hanging out and play the thing. don't know what it's called it's like a backyard game right it's meant for like fun casual hanging out play the thing yard darts were very heavy very large versions of the kind of dart that you throw like a dartboard yeah they weighed maybe a few pounds and they had metal pointed tips on them the the idea being you set up like two areas kind of far apart that are basically the targets and then you toss the yard dart through the air and it gently arcs and sticks in the grass you know it lands point down and sticks up and you can see any and you get some points or something it's a very simple sounding game yeah but i feel like just from that description can you tell why something that weighs three pounds and has a metal pointed tip and is meant to be thrown

probably shouldn't exist around six to 10 year old boys. Yeah. Yes. I can kind of put two and two together. And apparently that they were banned by Consumer Product Safety Commission in 1988 for the record. Yeah. Well, they're incredibly fucking dangerous.

Yeah. Looking at the pictures of them. They look dangerous. Even adults who are doing it safely, you could get a yard dart through your foot if you're playing in sandals and someone hucks one, you know, a little too far. It's so dangerous. They are literally responsible for the deaths of children,

which is why they got banned. Yeah, exactly. Fun game. Ar arrows that you throw it's great throw them hard kids up in the air big heavy arrows you throw towards other people super fun i'll catch it with my teeth ah yeah just imagine cornhole but with like spiked cannonballs just like yeah got it so anyway that existed and the neighbor who was probably the most like sort of bully to me he's not a nice guy and he treated me really poorly but we hung out all the time he owned the yard darts and also since we're all football players there's this game

that uh football players and a lot of people i guess probably are familiar with called like 500 or other names of it where a group of kids stands together and familiar with called like 500 or other names of it where a group of kids stands together and one person is like it they have the ball and you throw the ball up in the air and you say like 100 points and whoever catches it gets 100 points and the first person out of the herd of children to get to 500 points then becomes the thrower right yeah and there's all kinds of rules you can make it dead or alive so it's like oh even if it hits the ground you can still get the points so it's a dead scramble and everybody elbows each other well so imagine that game mixed with like the yard dart game except the only reward is you live if you don't get hit by the dart you live that's motivating uh and that's it and so whoever is the

biggest piece of shit takes a yard dart and whoever is the dumb idiots who hang around with their bullies all the time group up at the other end of the yard and the bully is like all right don't move till i throw it it's not fun unless it's dangerous. You got to stay closer together, closer, smaller target. And like literally this kid would just throw yard darts at us. And I think I got hit once on like the calf. It was like a glancing blow, but it still made a big gash on my calf. But that's just like the dumbest thing. One, who would do like that kid?

If he had hit one of us in the head throwing the yard darts he's a murderer he is an eight-year-old murderer and he has absolutely no concern for that but like all of us were participating i heard him be like all right what we're gonna do is we're gonna play 500 but i'm gonna use these yard darts and you guys just get out of the way right just don't let it hit you and i heard that and I'm like, all right. And continued to do multiple times. We played that more than once. Oh my God.

Anyway, I should be dead. And kids are terrifying. No, no, man. That just reminds me of all the different like childhood toys that are now banned just because they were too incredibly dangerous. Like I'm looking up some of these, like the old, uh, I don't, I don't know if they do these anymore you know those like uh you make candy in like this big science lab type of things and like the candy was like this gummy stuff that you flow through test tubes and all this shit and apparently it

was horrific choking hazards that actually makes me physically gagged I mean the candy was fucking awful no I know I remember and it's just like a kid can't differentiate between what's a toy and what's a piece of equipment and like the crafting of said candy oh my god I'm just looking at some of the toys recently that were banned like there's Avengers like Black Panther claws with like

actually sharp claws so of course a kid put his hand in it and just fucking tore up the other kids. Oh, my God. I don't feel like this is that dangerous, but my favorite toy that I believe has been banned. You remember Sky Dancers? They're like little fairy ballerina figurines. And it's kind of like a Beyblade, except it flies instead of being on the ground.

It starts on a thing and you pull the cord and it spins and flies like a little helicopter. Yeah, of course. Except they get sucked into wherever the air currents are going and if there's a fire the air is being drawn to the fire and then up and out the chimney yeah so if you do them in like a room with a fireplace that's on it just gets sucked into the fire and kids are chasing their new skydancer toy into the fire yeah yeah there's that like classic meme of the girl it's like christmas there's a christmas tree and she has the obviously new toy and launches it first time and it just goes right into the fire like two seconds and she's just like no oh my god there was

a toy called the clackers i don't know if you guys have ever seen this but i vaguely remember this being in like random like uh daycares or shit. It's like this kind of thing that you just, two plastic balls and you just like slap them together and they go clack, clack, clack, clack, clack. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so apparently in the 60s and the 70s, they weren't just like plastic. They were made of acrylic and they were just on two strings. acrylic and they were just on two strings and so you clack them together and at some point the acrylic could explode and it would send jagged shards of acrylic surging into people's eyes and like oh my god and what fun clacking two balls together oh boy oh slap bracelets oh dude

oh i remember those yeah slap bracelets aren't dangerous dude. Oh, I remember those, yeah. Slap bracelets aren't dangerous. Those are awesome. Yeah, but, like, people slap so much the metal gets exposed, so it's just a sharp metal edge inside. A razor you're meant to slap on your own wrist all the time. Yeah. Easy-bake ovens went through a couple. I don't know if those are still a thing, but people would get their fingers, kids got their fingers stuck in the door,

and then they had to replace it with, like, a thing with a grate, and I think that still caused more problems. Oh, definitely, I believe it, it yeah i just looked this up apparently there was a toy called atomic energy laboratory that contained actual traces of radioactive elements a lab set released by the ac gilbert company 1950 intended to create a kit so that children could create and watch chemical reactions get inspired to pursue careers in science but the kit had to be pulled in 1951 as it actually contains samples of uranium whoops hey you got something we can put in this kit that glows oh yeah i do you have some uranium here kids i know just the thing dude i had a bunch of these

i didn't know i didn't know the Burger King Pokemon balls were banned. Those were good, man. Oh, I thought you were talking about the radioactive kit. I played with this all the time. No, no, no. But magnetics, man. Magnetics were banned. No, I love magnetics.

Magnetics? Oh, no. It's like, you've seen those? It's kind of like building blocks. It's kind of like erector set. It's like panels with've seen those? It's kind of like building blocks. It's kind of like erector set. It's like panels with magnets on the corners and then you connect them together with little balls, like little bearings that you can build.

No, yeah, no. It was a big freaking problem. Kids will eat anything, like literally anything. And that was the problem with like water beads, you know, the things that just like absorb water and they grow bigger. That will explode your stomach. Exactly, kids eat them and then just like fucking, and they grow bigger. That will explode your stomach. Yeah, exactly.

Kids eat them and then just like fucking, I mean, an eight-month-old ate them and had to get surgery. Because they just kind of swell up big with water and you have water in you. So. I didn't know about this one, but in 2007, I guess Hannah Montana had a card game come out. And the card game was pumped full of lead. It had 75 times the safe amount of lead in the card game oh oh well i would assume that would be zero so it's impressive they got 75 times zero amount of lead 40 parts per million is i guess the amount you cannot have more than so it was 75 times 40 parts

per million god i don't know why that's so funny hannah montana came out with a card game 14 children died like just like jesus christ the jump from one to another is so fucking oh i had never seen this but this is amazing have you guys seen kite tubes yet no kite tubes no it's like an inner tube that's designed to be pulled behind a boat which normally it sits on the water you sit on top of the tube you pull it with the boat super fun this is one of those that's designed to generate aerodynamic lift oh no and it would just go like 10 20 feet in the air but it's you're not strapped into that you sit on top of those and hold on to a handle holy so you just have your kid up on a tube 20 feet in the air above water going

20 miles an hour then they slam down oh they don't just drop it probably just whip some straight oh my god three people died oh my god oh no i mean honestly though i kind of want to try it like i'm not gonna lie i mean it fun, but it does look incredibly dangerous. Yeah, quote, it just all depends on the conditions. It's okay, but you've got to be careful. Anyway, lawn darts are terrifying and kids are morons. And I can't believe I'm alive, but I did it. I survived lawn darts.

Good God. This Gilbert company had another dangerous product where you could blow glass, which had to be at 1,000 degrees Fahrenheit to blow. Here, have some uranium and molten glass, children. Gilbert. Wait, I'm seeing another. God, Gilbert is Aperture Science of the 1950s. Another Gilbert. Gilbert Castor Kit Jrr casting lead figures you create molten lead

and then pour it into cast to cast figurines out of lead what the hell man oh no god damn the picture is a kid with no safety gear whatsoever no mask of respiratory stuff just pouring molten lead into a cast and laying with it gilbert what the fuck dude oh my god okay so this kind of goes deeper alfred carlton gilbert was an american inventor athlete magician toy maker and businessman but he was best known for making the erector set which is like metal connects or something like that. Oh, yeah. Erector sets dope. Yeah. God, he founded Misto Manufacturing, a manufacturer of magic sets.

I think this guy might have just been a wizard or something. Like he was just trying to hide in plain sight. Like, good God. Nickname, the man who saved Christmas. I think this dude might actually secretly hate children. Like he's just sitting there like, all right, what else can we have these stupid fucking kids do? Molten glass, uranium.

Crystal meth. Everybody loves crystal meth. Let's make a kit where you use your parents' oven and the appropriate chemicals to refine and then create crystal meth. And then the kids can sell it and make a little money to support their family yeah wow this guy also won gold in the pole vault in the 1908 london olympics wow he had

a movie made about him no a biography the man who changed how boys and toys were made yeah god damn yeah give a little uranium they're made different after that. No, there was a movie in 2002, The Man Who Saved Christmas the Movie. Saved Christmas? The Man Who Saved Christmas. Oh my God. What?

Blow some glass, little Timmy. TV movie about AC. Oh my God, Jason Alexander plays AC Gilbert. What? George Costanza from Seinfeld. Jason Alexander, the actor, plays AC Gilbert in that movie. Also starring Kelly Rowan, Ari Cohen, C. David Johnson, Jane Eastwood. I'm knowing these people in decreasing extents but freaky jason

alexander was in the movie wow that is something special i kind of want to watch that apparently burger king had to recall their pokeball toys from the pokemon stuff back in 1999 apparently people choked like the suction from the pokeball gets stuck to their face and a couple of kids died from that i didn't know that one either yeah i had those i love those toys i think i still do somewhere yeah with the one with like that had the gold plated pokemon cards in them or something like that i think those might have been the later iteration the one that's pictured at least is just one that has like one of the fat pikachu models in it like a cheap looking plastic pokeball yeah god oh man watch this movie yeah i'm gonna watch the movie i'm looking at

things like that they're just like dumb shit that kids do and do you guys remember like i didn't do it as a kid but i imagine if i had known about i would have and maybe even talking about this is terrible you know what i'm not going to talk about this we are not advocating here on distractible anything that kids don't do stupid shit i feel like you have to talk about it now what the hell is that no it's it's probably everybody knows. It's where you like bend over and you like breathe really heavily and then you like take in a big breath

and you stand up straight and you like squeeze as hard as you can. It'll like make you pass out or something like that. Like just like passing out is not a hard thing to do. Like, cause I sometimes squat down on the floor and then I'll stand up and I'm about to pass out. Like it's not a difficult thing to do, but it's just like, why as a kid, is it just like up and I'm about to pass out. Like it's not a difficult thing to do, but it's just like,

why is a kid? Is it just like, holy shit, I can pass out. And it's like, why, why, why is that like a desire?

I don't know. I guess. Did you see it happen in a movie or something? Like, I mean, that's cool. I wish I could do that. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. I guess I got to go through my stories, but real quick before I do. Yeah, let's bring this back around. There was an actual flubber. Hang on. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. This is related to their toys.

You're out of line. You're out of line, man. You're out of line. You're out of line. Don't you dare. Hit me. Don't you talk back to me. I want you to hurt me.

You don't even have any points. You have zero points. Take some away anyway. And it could stay that way. It could stay that way. I don't want any points. I don't want your points. They're tainted points. They're have any points. You have zero points. Pick some away anyway. And it could stay that way. It could stay that way. I don't want any points. I don't want your points. They're tainted points.

They're like Gilbert points. Gilbert was a hero. An American hero. And we all know that. AC Gilbert saved Christmas, you blasphemer. Go blow some glass. Anyway, Bob, 50 points. Good job.

Oh, thanks. You're welcome, man. You're welcome. How do you like it? Nothing so far. But that depends on how good your story is. Well, not all that great So I guess the shorter one so it was like the day before picture day I was probably well, I guess we were prior on the same age so we were probably like fourth fifth grade and my brother was probably like first grade and

My mom had taken us out to get like haircuts get cleaned up made sure we had clothes for picture day because it was always a big thing because you know picture day meant that that was a picture is one of the yearbook and then you got all those little pictures that you give family and the bigger ones you put in the family frames and stuff like that and we got home I think my mom was working on dinner I was hanging out playing video games it was like time to eat and my mom calls us in like hey guys time come grab your food so i come in start dipping up she's dipping up and we're like huh where's zach that's my brother my little brother and zach nothing huh maybe he went and like fell asleep we go down the hallway toward

his bedroom and the bathroom door is closed and we're like oh okay maybe he's just using the restroom and we hear like a it was noise we didn't really we understood the cutting noise the other one we didn't really know we're like zach and he's like i'm busy we're like what what are you doing in there nothing and at this point my mom's opening the door because she knows that he's up to no good and she opens the door and even though he'd just gotten a haircut he's got a pair of scissors and he has his hair cut all kinds of weird and uneven. And he's got a permanent marker that he's marking all over his face the day before picture day, because I guess he decided he wanted to be a native American for

picture day. So he was trying to give himself some haircut. I don't know. He thought he was cutting his hair to look like a, I don't know what. And he was trying to give himself like facial tattoos with the permanent marker which, you know, as a kid, what he did was just squiggle permanent marker all over his face. How old was he? First grade. First grade, you said, right? First grade. Okay, so really young.

Yeah, yeah. Very young. I wish I could... I mean, I don't have the pictures on me, but I wish I could show the pictures because my mom had to shave his head. So I had to fully shave his head and we couldn't quite get the permanent marker gone. So they were not great pictures. That was a really minor story that I remembered. Yeah, yeah.

I lived on a street, I guess it's around the same age, maybe a little bit older. I was probably more like eight or nine. And I lived at like the beginning of my street. And then about, I don't know, 13 houses, 14 houses at like the beginning of my street and then about I don't know 13 houses 14 houses down was the end of the street where I had a friend who lived there and we used to go to each other's houses all the time we had like those razor scooters we would ride around and sometimes I'd pack up like I had a playstation I'd pack up like in a plastic bag which probably wasn't very safe in hindsight just ride it down to his house on my scooter but neither one of us

really had a great yard for a tree house we had like one tree in our yard and he had a bunch of trees but they were all like the branches were way too high for us to do anything with but we really wanted a tree house and halfway between our houses there was a house on the left that was hidden behind just a row of pine trees and those pine trees were real easy to climb up into like the branches were low they were nice and thick sturdy we'd go climb in them sometimes and hang out so we decided we were going to grab all of the big sticks and limbs from our yards and take them to our neighbor's yard and build a tree house so on our scooters we made like it had to have been 10 to 20 trips

back and forth from our houses just bringing our dead limbs to this neighbor's yard. And we started trying to construct a treehouse with no nails, no nothing. We just literally laid sticks across different branches and tried to build this treehouse. And eventually, I guess the neighbor caught on that something weird was going on because he came over and we had just a mound of garbage in their yard. and we had just a mound of garbage in their yard and uh all of these limbs laid across a couple branches that we were trying to stand on that were definitely not thick enough to be stood on oh god and the dude uh basically just comes out screams at us to get the hell out of there we never went to his yard again again this isn't like a super high end story just a stupid thing we did of trying to build a tree house in a neighbor's yard so not a climactic ending other than getting

yelled at but in hindsight trying to build a treehouse in a neighbor's yard so not a climactic ending other than getting yelled at but in hindsight trying to build a treehouse in a neighbor's yard not our finest moment that i mean i've done tons of stuff in in neighbor's yards that we weren't supposed to do i mean it was like this one our neighborhood one house had like a hill like a good hill and so we would always sneak over to that house and we would go down that hill and everywhere we can the winter was sliding but in the summer that didn't stop us so you know those red wagons the red wagons that apparently everyone has oh yeah we would just like take that up all the way to the top we would take off the sides you know we didn't want those getting in the way and we would ride that bad boy down the hill and when i say hill maybe this is kid brain but i'm pretty sure

it was like a 50 degree drop down this hill like by the time we got down to the bottom which was just trees by the way so we had to try to stop before we got to the trees which we would hit and so like we would just like like go down there all the all the time and oh the reason we took down the sides is because when we wiped out which we did because that's the only way to stop it it really hurt when you hit those wooden sides so we'd like our collarbones would like like across across the red and we'd just be tossed out and like i imagine the neighbors looking out and seeing these kids just screaming down there like and then like they fling out and i bet our limbs like just like cartwheeling through the air

and then we sit on the ground for a second get back up and then push the cart back up the hill to do it all over again like it's just god man being a kid and being invulnerable was great i mean that sounds fun no i'm just saying that sounds really fun i mean i'm into that we had a swimming pool a little bit later on and uh i remember we decided that doing belly flop seemed like a good idea but we thought we'd up the ante and my mom had these like pool floats that sat just on the top of the water to where if you were like laying on them a layer of like water would go on your back too but you'd still like be floating and we were like those are perfect and i remember we tried to belly flop on those a couple times and it hurt like no fucking other because you jump off the diving board.

Of course you didn't just jump off the side. You had to go off the diving board and then belly flop onto a mat that had like just a thin layer of water on top. And then it was just a fucking mat. Oh, that was another dumb one. Speaking of swimming pools. So I had some, I forget if it's family or friends of family in Michigan, we would go up for like, that's where most of my family was. So we'd go up to Michigan all the time in the summer for holidays and we had this one house we would go

to that had like one of those above ground circular pools yeah where it was like it wasn't that deep and it wasn't that large you know and inevitably when enough kids got in the pool that thing would happen where someone was like let's all run in the same direction and turn it into a whirlpool and like i'm a big kid but i was always like one of the younger kids in this group so all the teenagers would start doing this and i'm like my head is above water but i'm like standing on my toes like barely above the water as it is and i'm like down i'm the whirlpool is fun right there was always the same progression of the whirlpool for me as the one of the smaller kids where it starts and you're like i feel it like if you stop moving for a second it still pulls you along and you're like yes it's working but all the teenagers

are like faster come on like they're all like you know puberty roided out teenagers are like i can go faster they're going like full speed there's always a turning point where like i'm running i'm running my feet aren't touching the ground anymore i'm kind of floating now i'm in the center spinning and it goes from like being in a fun thing that everyone's doing to the teenagers making a toilet that's flushing the small children into the center and and all the small kids are like bouncing off each other in the middle just like oh this is fun like and you're like you're probably not gonna drown but like as a kid you're kind of like oh oh fun but scary oh mostly scary oh man but like i'm not

gonna tell him to stop that's not cool yeah I don't know why I just remember this. Wade, were you there? Tyler was over in LA one time and we were over at the pool. And then he was like, Tyler was like, hey, let's all run in a circle around the pool. And I was like, super cool. Like, yeah, but the pool was way too fucking big to do this. It was like an apartment pool. And so we're just like, and there's only like five of us.

So we're all like running in a circle around the pool like yeah yeah we're gonna get to work it's gonna great and i just remember like i'm having an out-of-body experience of this memory like did we look like fucking idiots to all the other apartments that must have been looking down yes absolutely 100 were you i don't think i was there for that one unfortunately no that's 100% one of those situations where it's like a TV show right one shot is you down in it and it's like sloshing and you guys are looking at each other making eye contact and running and then

cut to like the third floor balcony someone sitting there having a coffee just looking just like wow fucking idiots wait I might have been there oh god this memory i thought i'd blocked out just came back of us running in a but i mean like i don't know why now i'm looking at and thinking that it was dumb because at the moment i remember being like oh

yeah we're gonna make a whirlpool but then like we tried for like 30 minutes or something and it was like not moving the water yeah there were like five of us total in the pool and it was a big like public pool we didn't do anything i know i know and i'm like i'm not knocking tyler for the idea we were all on board with it but now i'm just like gosh were we idiot did we look dumb we needed like 13 more people for it to even be possible to start that thing 100 there were like three people who either watched you for a while or saw you at some point and walked away and were just like oh my god these idiots if this is the place i'm thinking of it was kind of like later in the

evening or night too so like yeah no that was exactly yeah that was exactly oh good time fun stuff man fun nice pool yeah no not bad i was like you really enjoyed it did you guys so mark you try and hurt yourself i don't know what your deal is wait did you ever have anything that happened to you when you were a kid that like you should have like broken your spine or something because i have this memory of i think it was maybe my birthday i don't know i got this thing it was essentially a boy's dollhouse right it's like a castle but it like opened up in the back and you had little figurines and you could

play in the castle and like the drawbridge would go down it was like a whole play set sort of deal when i was a little kid like i was maybe in second or third grade so it was like if i picked it up it was taller than my head it was a few feet tall and i was a short littleish kid and i was maybe in second or third grade so it was like if i picked it up it was taller than my head it was a few feet tall and i was a short littleish kid and i just got really excited i was playing with it in like the family room where everyone's hanging out and at some point i'm just making a huge mess being really loud and annoying and at some point the adults are like hey buddy why don't you bring that downstairs why don't you clean that up why don't you bring that downstairs once you clean that up once you bring that cool toy away from us and i just was like so hype about this toy that i had that i just hooked everything inside i closed up the

castle thing and just picked it up and was like okay and just went to run downstairs and i swear to god i tripped six inches before even taking the first step down the stairs to the basement and went head over heels, tumbling around the castle and landed in a heap with it on top of me at the bottom. Just like I didn't even move. And I was just like, am I dead? Is this, am I dead? And like my dad came down and was like, what the hell? Because all the adults heard was, you know, insane racket of a child falling downstairs.

But, but then he sees me and it's a whole thing. Not a scratch. I laid there for a minute and then dad looked at me and he's like, I don't know, call the ambulance. And I stood up and I was like, no,

I think I'm fine. And just went and played. And like, if I did that as an adult, I would be fucking dead. If I fell down a half flight of stairs in my current physical condition, I would never be the same again. I would be ruined. Oh man. I don't know why I just thought of this, but there was one time when I was a kid where I wasn't stupid. It was like the first

time I made a cold calculated decision. And I know that sounds weird, but I was like nine or 10 or no, I must've been like 10 or 11, somewhere in range right at the cutoff but my dad was dating this terrible person who i have no problem saying is a terrible horrible person awful terrible human being wow rough if we read the morning newspaper comics before them they would they they actually they discovered that we, and then they burned the comics after they read it every time. That's how terrible this person was. That's a weird reaction. Children. If we read the morning comics before her, she started to burn them after she read them.

That's how terrible this person is. What a monster. And that is just the most minor thing that she did. And so one day, she's driving me to the grocery store, and I want this, like, toy, like, little dart gun. You know, it shoots little sticky darts. Yeah, like a cheapo little suction cup pistol, right? Yeah, a little pistol, got little suction cup things on them.

And so I open it in the car, and I shoot it to the front windshield. I'm in the backseat, and this person does not like this very much. So they turn around, and they say, like, you know, they yell at me, like hey, don't do that. And so like, I point the gun at her and then she's looking at me like with this expression, like, and she says, you won't shoot me. And in my head, and again, I'm 10 years old at this time. I look inside of myself and I ask myself, to myself and I ask myself am I prepared for all of the unbelievable consequences that this action is about to unleash upon me and the answer that was tossed forward from the back of my mind was yes I am and I pulled the trigger and shot her dead between the eyes it didn't stick i wanted it to stick on her forehead so badly but it didn't and then she was like so pissed we're at a stoplight and then she just fucking spins the car around in a u-turn for some reason i guess to go back in the parking lot so that she could scream at me for a bit but the

whole time i was just like that might be the first cold calculated decision i've ever made and i was in so much trouble i was in so much trouble after that one. Was it worth it? Oh, God, yeah. I'd do it again now. I would get like a dart minigun right now. I would just blast it. I know that she's probably extremely old and or dead right now,

but just like... Terrible person. Stole my dad's car. Stole your dad's car? What the hell? Yeah, after they broke up because, you know, they were terrible. So, stole my dad's car stole your dad's car what the hell yeah after they broke up because you know they were terrible so stole my dad's car god damn just a really horrible human being anyway well you asked me if i did anything stupid where i should have like died or broken a

bone i don't know what age i was so it might be a little bit older but i do remember um i had a friend who had these like exercise balls i think his mom like used exercise like balls to like you know I don't know what the hell you do on them because I don't really know much I think you sit on them and I don't fucking know but we decided that the best way to use them was to go into their family room where they had like a coffee table and all this like wooden furniture with a lot of jagged edges and a brick fireplace and to compete to see who could jump land and stand on them the longest and try to maintain their balance. And, I mean, just to cut to the chase, nothing terrible ever ended up happening.

It almost did many times because this is something we did on not one occasion, but probably like five to ten occasions. But yeah, we got more and more brave the less anything bad ever happened. And it got to the point where we would do like sprinting starts, run, jump, try to hit our head on the doorway Land on one of these balls balance ourself and would always end with like bouncing off or going flying somewhere and we'd hit our back against something like oh But you know to be tough. It's like oh, I'm fine. I'm fine. I can do it again right now

But in hindsight looking at all of the sharp things the glass the bricks Just the thought of you know Bouncing off and landing on our backs and things like probably should have broken something probably should have cut something needed stitches been murdered don't recommend anyone doing that but at the time it was really fun and we had zero consequences and never learned anything from our actions done super fun oh god you know someone's got to get hurt someone's got to get hurt by the way speaking of getting hurt guys do you want to play lawn darts with this thing that i just found for some reason the lawn dart launcher it's a stinger dart it's a tactical i love the word tactical in anything

tactical ballistic dart gun launcher blaster no stinger tactical ballistic dart gun launcher blaster sure sure these images are terrifying comes in four colors they're beautiful those are safeties oh those are long slender darts yeah that is a murder dart that is a five pronged murder dart or five murder darts there are five separate ones it looks like a yeah yeah yeah wow yeah no i think we should play essentially laser tag but but with those. Everyone gets one on each wrist, so you get 10 shots total. Just release us into a warehouse full with rusty pointy stuff, and last one standing wins. This whole website is just a nightmare.

Yeah, so what? This is bladeaddict.com. Oh, man. Look at all these things that look really good. Oh my god. I want American flags on my tomahawks. That makes sense. Oh, I love the sword section. There's a sword section.

So many good swords. Oh my god. God, I I've never imagined myself as a sword guy. I just don't see appeal. However, I do have bed knife, which is a sword guy i just don't see the appeal however i do have bed knife which is a sword i got from the renaissance festival these are way too cheap 35 bucks for a sword they're probably like cast aluminum or something like what do these say what they are it says high carbon steel for 50 bucks i don't believe you no way that's a 440 stainless steel blade for 35

dollars for two 23 inch like machetes well you know the middle ages are over so deflation is probably in effect but an 18 inch full tang machete the metal for 25 bucks the metal alone costs more than that i feel like we're doing a sponsorship These prices are so unbelievably low if you use the code distractible you might as well be getting it for free No, I think we were talking mad shit about this company I kind of want to buy one of these now just to see how garbage it is This feels like the soldier store of knives like this whole thing I'm not gonna lie. We haven't done a soldier update on

this show but man we should how are you doing wait you had a soldier update recently didn't you uh there was one like a few days ago let me see what it was it was nothing too crazy it wasn't like episode worthy for a whole episode but uh dude this is the website where you get butterfly knife combs from i always wondered about that. Did you know, did you guys have that friend when you were kids who had like a switchblade comb or like a butterfly knife comb where, you know, it looks like a knife, but then they're like, and then it's just a comb for their hair.

But every teacher ever would see that and be like, no, no, you do not bring that to school i'm keeping that till the end of the day and the student was always like a bitch oh man the comb i fucking love the comb god this is where you get that this is that website where all those well but so i always wondered that right because this didn't exist like what do kids now have access to that we didn't have access to because there was the one place that i knew of as a kid where you could get like a knife if you were just really desperate to have a knife because kids like that for some reason there was a local like game shop it was right next to like a chinese

and asian cultural shop where they had like you know lucky cats and and tea sets and just like a variety of things from like pacific asian sort of countries and i didn't know anything about it but in the back of that shop they had one glass case with all these like pocket knives and switch blades and things and that was the place where they didn't give a fuck how young you were if you walked in and had the cash and you were like that knife here's the cash the guy behind the counter was just like all right here's your knife supposed to be like 18 that guy don't care business is business and business is good yeah 40 bucks is 40 bucks and he doesn't care these knives are cheap from china knockoffs he paid five bucks each give me the cash oh my god this is beautiful anyway sorry what is the

soldier update all right so he spent two hundred thousand dollars on a car a maybach truck maybach is a pretty high-end brand and then started complaining about how ugly it was and how much he disliked it so basically he spent yeah he dropped 200 grand on a truck just to talk about how much it was a terrible truck and not worth buying and i guess he had some kind of showdown uh versus battle i don't know with bow wow which he almost got canceled because of uh something that happened with security I was trying to like I was trying to catch up on all the news here No, seems there's anything else every like day. There's a soldier update of some kind

It's just a matter of digging deep to find the juicy bits in there It's always up to something man if you did daily vlogs he'd be great. I mean he invented Logan Paul I don't know if you knew that he invented That's crazy. Why did he do that yeah back in 2015 he took a photo with him which made him the logan paul he is today apparently my god he's the reason existence itself occurs whoa he is logan paul's true father yeah who knew god does that explain a lot or is that making more confusing? I don't know I've got like 30 articles hoping different different little tidbits about Soulja Boy just to get those sweet juicy nuggets Oh my imagine though spending $200,000 on something. They'd be like I kind of hate it

Wait, I don't sorry. This is just so weird. I don't want to click on this website, but the headline is Soulja Boy heavily dating Kim boy heavily dating kim kardashian heavily dating heavily dating me wow what is heavily dating me oh my god well you gotta click to find out i don't want to make it so many viruses i'm clicking on it here i go i'm going in heavily itavily dated. It's fine. Oh, it's not. Oh, it's not fine. It's not fine. Oh, it's fine. It's fine.

There's a lot of ads. It looks weird. This website feels wrong. I'm linking to it for you guys. It seems safe. Thanks. I'll let you talk about it. It looks safe.

No, it's fine. It's fine. But the font is weird, and the sizing is odd, and everything is wrong. You're not convincing me to click on no click on it's fine oh whoa what happened i know it's weird this is like if an ai made a news website it's strange i don't get it what's wrong with this website through ben through single reason must certainly face many proposals for minimum the approach is identified that of soldier boy is undoubtedly the most offbeat to date so the boy trolls again i invented logan ball i don't know dredging quite heavily the future

dredging dredging quite heavily the future ex-wife of kanye west wow maybe that means something i don't know what it means but i don't think any person should dredge another person it doesn't sound good i have to say I didn't know Kimye had broken up. I didn't either. Is that real? Yeah, I think so. This is a brand of news I don't dive into all that often, but when I do, I always feel like I'm in over my head. Alright. How'd we go from kid accidents to

Soulja Boy? I don't know, man. That is the essence of Distractable, my friend, and I will award points for getting us there. Hell yeah. Oh wait, you're hosting? I'm hosting. You guys should have a versus battle. Okay, it's time to tally the points because this episode is running a little long. This week's episode I'm going to award points based on how

distracted we got and how many tangents we walked upon. Bob, I know that we went on several tangents and we got to the interesting territory of Alfred Gilbert and discovering about his life and the man who stole Christmas and the movie thereof. Or the man who didn't steal who saved Christmas. The man who stole Christmas! AC Grinch life and the man who stole Christmas and the movie thereof. Or the man who didn't steal who saved Christmas.

AC Grinchbert, the man who stole Christmas. I want to add that I brought up the two Gilbert products. Yeah, you brought up one of the Gilbert products for glassblowing. I think the other one, the chemistry... No, that was Bob, was it not? Nope. I brought up the lead smelting one. Right, the lead smelting. You brought up the

radioactive one. Okay, so I will give credit for Wade on that one. That is a Wade credit. Thank you. So there's a point for each set. That's two points. I'm wiping the board clean of points. Everyone has zero points. Oh. Wade, two points for that. Getting to Alfred Gilbert is another point. Bob, we went on many tangents there.

I discovered the dart gun thing and there was several other that I'm going to give you one point for the... No, you keep your point for the first story and the title. I am so lost on these points. No, let him keep going. He's getting there. I'm getting there. I'm getting there. So, Bob, you get a point for the first story.

You get a point for the story itself because it led to talking about toys instead of kids just being dumb, which opened up a lot of things. Wade still gets those three points. I have kids just being dumb, which opened up a lot of things. Wade still gets those three points. Bob, you get another point because of the somehow something you said got me to the dart blaster gun. Lawn darts, that was it. Lawn darts for the dart. Soulja Update gets a point.

Bob, your stories were more substantial and had conclusions. So I'm going to give you two points. All right. So it's 42. That's what I've heard. Bob's a winner. I disagree with that part, but I agree with the rest. I agree with Mark's math. I'm grading purely on tangents alone. And I think we went on more tangents with Bob. If anybody on the subreddit can help us calculate the math that we just heard, let us know. I'm going to come up with a nice grading system for like number of tangents for each like branch

off and either one of you can do it. I'm going to actually come up with a nice grading system for like number of tangents for each like branch off and either one of you can do it i'm gonna actually come up with a better grading system that's like for every branch it's a point like as farther away we get is like total distance traveled it's like a pyramid scheme of podcasting yeah exactly i'm actually gonna need a notebook and be like okay one branch one branch branch branch wait how much money did we earn then from the scheme oh you didn't earn any oh oh yeah no is that why the? Yeah, you're at the bottom. You're the hypotenuse. You lose. Yeah, sorry, man.

It's just the way it goes. I thought pyramid schemes were like equilateral triangle pyramids. Oh, it's not equal. No, no. Oh. All right. Well, congratulations to Bob on your big win. Thank you.

Everybody at home can... That was just me doing Wade's voice. It's okay. That was really impressive extra point for that. I was totally convinced. That was just me doing Wade's voice. It's okay. That was really impressive. Extra point for that. I was totally convinced. That sounded just like him, right? Yeah, that was pretty good. So I guess Wade, don't even show up next week because Bob can take your spot and do both parts. Oh, hell yeah. I'm going on vacation.

Get some lawn darts and have a party. You can find us here every Monday on your favorite podcast platform. Subscribe, join, follow, or whatever it is to keep up with these, or just show up on Monday at midnight when these release. Thank you everybody so much for listening to us. Hope you had a wonderful drive or whatever you were doing at work.

Hope we were able to entertain you for a little bit longer. And if you don't follow this podcast, then we will come find you. And we will subject you to all the horrors that we experienced as a child. I didn't have any. Podcast out! Yeah, Mark, you forgot the outro. Damn. Right as a child. I didn't have any. Podcast out! Yeah, Mark forgot the outro damn. Right I did I did I did. Is that an extra point? Do I win now? No, I did my Wade impression. That was my, that was my. Oh, yeah, that was good. It was a little gravelly. It was good, right? Man, you guys really don't need me. I've been like replaced.

Are you even real? I don't need to be anymore. No, that was me. Well, I don't need to be anymore. Sorry. Me again. I don't think it works anymore. No, that was me. I don't need to be anymore. Sorry. Me again. I don't think it works as well if you actually talk. I don't need to be anymore. I don't need to be anymore. Yeah, you know, I don't need to be anymore.

All right, fine. Podcast out.