Distractible - Mark's One Man Show (Part 2)

Episode Date: April 20, 2026

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Good evening, gentle listeners or watchers, and welcome to distractible. This episode, belittling Bob cleans his micro pond, while Wacked Wade prowls car, and hurts from playing with his balls, then they double-team to ban. Multi-talented Marks salaciously slays spires, notes, nymphs, moose mice, power paints like Picasso, and talks backwards like a titan. From facing foils to Wade's terrible. translations. It's time for

Mark's One Man Show Part 2. Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show. Hello.

Bob, you come in. Oh, okay, yeah. Hey, welcome back to another episode of Distractable. I'm your co-host for today's episode. And I'm your co-host for today's episode. If you missed the last one, you should go back and watch because it was a real Ripper. And it ended with Mark getting the winner's wheel and landing on the one-man show.

And therefore, Bob and I had to do a lot of work. Hours spent by a candlelight, moonlight, and a little bit of other light source. Mark's least favorite kind of light. Moonlight. Oh, God, not moonlight. Man, this whole Artemis thing was happening, and I just had to turn off my teeth. Maybe unplug my cable. Internet, I was just like, I can't deal with this moon nonsense.

Oh, yeah, it marks the competitor. We usually, I'm introducing us feels so stilted now. Like, I get that there might be people listening to this. Like, they're probably new listeners, blah, blah, blah. But it's like over 400 of these things. If you want an introduction that makes sense, go watch one of the early ones. We really had a whole script as a whole thing. Anymore?

What's the point? You know? Especially today. usually there's one judge and there's two guys and they're competing out the window. Today is Mark's one man show. It's all about Mark. It's, yay.

Yippie. So ready. It's going to be a celebration of things that Mark enjoys and that Mark is very good at. See, I know both of you when you're judging, you put your thumb on the scale because you're like, it's a little too close to a tie here. Let me just. No, me, I face it down. I phase it down.

I've had a number of winter wheel spins lately. What do you mean? That's true. That's true. But for my story, I'm going to keep saying this. Oh, no. Craft the narrative. Yeah, sorry, sorry.

Craft the narrative. Yeah, because there's no other people here so I could lose as many points as I want. So I'm free for the first time in our entire podcast history. Yeah, you've never been a cruel dictator before or anything. Never, ever. I don't recall that happening in explicit detail Never Wait, we were going to still do small talk, right?

Since we only do these so rarely now The podcast episodes, yeah I feel like we have to do small talk Otherwise, no one's going to understand what's going on In our very busy and exciting lives I agree and we have so much to talk about That we didn't want to skip a week Because then it's like, well, it'll be gone by next week

We'll never remember it happened I just took a trip to Cincinnati That was fun just to visit our Cincinnati or? Yeah, we were all hanging out. Oh. Who's we? We, you, me? That other guy? You, me and Molly's husband? That other guy. Not a good start, not a good start.

Yeah. James, is that you? What do you think he got it? It's a good city. It looks really nice. Smells great. Tastes wonderful. There's really, no comparison, no comparison to the, the Sincey, as they call it in the Sinci. The Sinci.

That's true. That's catching on. Copyrighted phrase. You owe Mr. Cincinnati $5. Is that like the red guy with the baseball head? No, that's Mr. Red Lakes. Oh, okay. Mr. Cincinnati is our glorious founder and leader, and he's the one who invented the catchphrase, the Sinci. But he also has a baseball for a head, but that's coincidence. Coincidence.

It's a tragic childhood accident. Not a fun baseball mascot. Don't get them mixed up. But other than that, you know, besides the things that you guys, talked about it's been nothing but Slay the Spire 2. That has been my life. It's been so nice. Everybody already knows this because Slay of the Spire 2 was like the number one most played

games. It's apparently running on it. I just open steam. It's running right now. Are you accidentally playing it somewhere? Oh, I think it might be open on my laptop or something like that. It's very, very fun. I'm not going to make any videos about it because I don't need it, but it's just like it's just

so stupendously good. So simple but complex, it's really, really nice. However, there's some, this happens with games like this, whenever there's an update, and they're like, we're nerfing this and we're going to balance this. You know, gamers just go like, low review. Would they nerf? Tell me.

I don't know. They've nerfed a bunch of things because what they don't want is for builds to easily just go into infinity. And I mean, I know it's possible. I've never done it. But it's like, you know, some people, instead of playing for, you know, fun and a casual thing, you know, some people need like, I gotta be the most powerful ever in history forever. My dad, when he was working on doing layouts of computer books for yada yada, for Wiley or whatever, Wiley and Coyote Books Company. Acme? Yeah, he would take a break by playing this game called Mice Men.

And let me tell you, there's no progression. There's no rogue like. light or anything of the type. It's just you have mice on the side. You pull them up and down and they walk and if they jump on the step on the other one's heads and kill that mouse. And then you win by getting the most people

to the other side. And it's, it never changed. Didn't get it. Well, I guess it didn't get patches, but, you know, he played that and he was happy. He had to go uphill with those mice both ways. These ungratefuls, you know. Spoiled.

Spoil is what I say. I was expecting the mice soapbox today, but I didn't expect it to be so good. Ah, man, I just Googled the Mice Men game, and wow, my memory was perfect. Because I used to watch my dad play that all the time. And just the way the mice turn and look at you when they're like, we're trusting you with our lives here. It's a DOS game. I forget, I don't even know. When was it first made?

Oh, wait, I know this. Yeah, this is like unlocking a memory. Oh, 95. Okay. I also played this. I did not understand it because I was a child, but I was like, wow, look at that. They walk around. Yep.

No, I could not win at this. Don't they eat cheese? Wow. I'm going to find the IP for this. I'm going to make the Mice Men movie. Make a billion dollars. That'll show us all. Yeah.

But all of the mice are just Mark standing there and they look over at you at the same time? Six years from now, there's going to be an interview with Mark, and it's going to cut back to the clip from This is like, I'm going to find the IP for this and come back to Mark in real life. He's like, well, what can I say? I have vision. Everyone thought I was joking. I used more cheese than any director before me. The most fake cheese on a set in history.

Mark in the hospital with a yellow, orange eyes. I had a cheese accident. I don't know how. but it'll all be filmed in the NACMO. These are funny. See, that's good. Yeah, Wade, you just need to warm up with those few bad jokes. Not that you've ever told a bad joke in your life, but...

No, it's all I needed. Thankfully, no one saw. Unless they did. I don't remember. Anyway, that's the news. If I had news, I said news. It's also, people don't care, but I'll say it anyway. A lot of NAB news came out just today when we're recording it. And it's the most exciting day. like video-related tech

you could possibly imagine and I'm stuck here doing my stupid one-man show instead of reading all the delicious, delightful news. We all love the national ass butts. I don't know what stands for. Well, you got it.

That's it, man. I thought I thought he was wrong. I was going to throw my answer out there, but he got it, first try. The new amazing but nothing came to mind. You could say butts again. You've butts. No, no. I was trying to do a real techie. What's a techie? Where's it to be? Backlog.

Yeah, backlog. That's it. You guys have got me, though, where I've been playing Slate Aspire 2, and, dude, I have been plowing, Carl. That sounds weird out that way. Dude, you've just been giving it to Carl? Whoa. I've just been giving it to Carl. Oh, my God. I'm like half three quarters of the way through Bedlam Bride now I'm just I'm tearing through

It's crazy huh? I feel like I say that every time you give us a A dungeon crawler update yeah like you guys even though with you guys telling me this I'm like Okay, they're saying that but like it has to have some chill there gonna be some amount of chill Are you out of the first phase yet are you into the second phase? I just got to where It officially says part two I think dude it gets so crazy No So much crazier. You have no idea.

Part one was crazy. How can it get more crazy? You have no idea. You have no idea. I don't. Every time I think I do, the wrenches, they come flying. It's like patches from dodge balls throwing wrenches at me nonstop, and I can't dodge them. They're all it.

I know, right? Oh, I have been battling our pool. We have a pool in the backyard. I think the way you say that, pool. I have been trying to get it balanced so that it's not toxic And I think the last people who lived here didn't take very good care of it is what I've been running up against Because I thought I think I did research and I thought I've been doing it right And it just every time I do something it like makes it worse

But I think I'm on I think I'm on the right track I thought it was right I think I had too many dissolved salads I'm racing to get the pool open because every day I'm out there like pouring crap in the pool and cleaning it And James is just looking out the window like oh, when did we get to pool? Dad's playing with the pool. I want a pool. Why do you have to rush? What kind of time windows does chemical reaction have?

Is it like organic chemistry class where it's like you really need to precisely? I mean, everything you do is kind of like see where it's at the next day, right? So I'm like, I'm doing research and like, okay, this is the problem. Can't get any free chlorine. It means there's still too much stuff in the water. All right, I need to shock it again. Put the shock in, leave it overnight. come back the next day.

Now it's cloudy. Oh, why would that have made it cloudy? Do a little research for it. And it's like, all right, the pH is too low. Maybe I need to raise the pH and then try to get... I don't know, man. I don't know about pools. It's a whole thing.

I don't know shit about chemistry. But yeah, I'm just standing out there like scooping gunk out of our pool and trying to get it working. And James is standing in the window just like, I want to go to the pool. It's so bad. Oh, God. I know, man. I know. I'm working on it.

I didn't pool, but I played basketball for an hour and a half yesterday, and I can barely move today. That's impressive? Maybe. Ow. I was filming for Cloak, and I barely did anything. This is how out of shape I am, so I understand the feeling here, where all I'm doing is hauling a camera around with a tripod, and I'm like getting in some angles. And I'm not even doing a lot.

We're just like, they're in one place, you know, just needed to move things around. I was so sore in my hips, like my outer hip muscles, just. heart like er ache i've never had an ache there before but i forget how physical it is when you're just trying to lug a camera around do you have like a dolly for the tripod or do you have to pick it up and wiggle it i pick it up yeah even if you i imagine it's quite a heavy serious tripod because you don't fuck around with cheap equipment anymore no i don't i don't but still i could if i thought about it a little bit they make a tripod wheel base where you can wheel it around and click it locked.

And I don't have that. There's a lot of things that I could do. So just in my old age, NAB releases are happening right now. What if they have the new super tripod deluxe? They have an AI powered wheelbase. You just say what you want to film and it moves to where it thinks you want it to be. And then you actually move it to where it's supposed to be.

I'm thinking about filming from like the one third on this one. But what about the one sixth? I think that's a great idea, Mark. Let's talk about ideas as we make this happen. Thanks, tripod. What? You know, this guy thinks he's a filmmaker. He doesn't know about the one-third and the one-sixth.

Oh, man, I got so much to learn. Don't you do the two-eighth? This is all the fractions. Yeah, two-eight. You don't want four. The two-eight. I know you could technically simplify, but it's eight boxes, so you still have to say the two. It's a lot of fractions in movies, Mark.

You got to catch up. My dad was filming under the car, and he was like, I said one-third, not one-sixth. He throws a tripod at my head. How do you think I'm going to capture this macro shot? Oh, good times. Classic. That being said, do you think it's time, Bob?

Time for the one-man show to begin? One-man show time. You guys are like full frame in your cameras, and I'm always like way down to hear it. I look so tiny. You can aim it. No, you can't. There's nothing you can do about it.

I forgot. Waits cameras built into the wall. It doesn't aim. I forgot. You know, the one thing. thing I never thought about. I was like, no, it's really mounted on the desk. I could move the monitor back and then I could have more space to tilt it down. Yeah, don't you have giant monitors? They're very big. If I'm thinking about it correctly, I'm pretty sure all of that stuff moves.

We're a very not mobile household here. Maybe, maybe I shouldn't do it right now. Yeah, I don't know if right now is the time to get it to do it. No, do it right now. I forgot that all three of my monitors are now on one stand and they're very big and heavy and a slight movement. How are they on one stand? I found some custom third party stand that's not meant to hold monitors this big, but I made it work. What do you mean you made it work? Sketch. The way you protect your investments is hilarious to me. You bought like the most expensive monitors in the known universe and then bought a $12 Amazon special stand to put them on. What do we know? It was a very expensive third party stand. But it was for the, why do you buy an expensive thing for the wrong purpose?

I didn't understand when I bought it. I didn't know size mattered, but stands. I don't understand you. I thought it was a one size fit all kind of thing. All right, Mark. Yes. We're going to need you to open Microsoft Paint. All right.

And you're going to be sharing your screen, but you get it all configured how you want to be doing it. The first game for today's show we have played before, but you have always been on the delivering end and Wade and I have been on the receiving end and we thought we had so much fun with that that we wanted you to do it all right that sounds good I don't mind that that's great like your your description about what happened at the red carpet the Oscars was so iconic you're clearly much more talented at this drawing in MS paint than we are type stuff well should I do the calligraphy brush or should I do the natural pencil oh you can could do however you so choose, bud.

Oh, that's pretty, but I don't know if that's going to work, right? I do want you to set it up correctly. You're going to want a double tall canvas, as if you needed room to do one painting, and then beneath it, another painting, all on one big canvas. Wait, do you remember the order that we had discussed for these? I know my order. Do you know your order? Does our order matter, comrade?

I think I know my order. Yeah, I've got the order situated properly on my end, I believe. Or if not, then it's the order I'm deciding to do now. I'm going to flip a coin. Heads is tails. Nope, nope. Hang on. Hang on.

Whoa. Heads is tails. Tails I win. All right. Here we go. Hed's Wade. Tails is me. It's a lady.

We got the heads. Okay. So Wade is going to go. first and what's about to happen is that Wade and I are both about to send you an image. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, we're not. Oh, no, that's the other thing. We're about to not send you shit.

Yeah, don't do that. Don't do that. Hold on. We're about to describe to you an image and you're going to draw it. We're going to send you an image, you draw it. Oh, God. Yeah, I'm functioning. I'm a full blast here. That's all I got.

And Wade gets to go first, and Wade gets to go first, and Wade has 30 seconds to work with you on this image. Okay. And then I'm going to have a timer. The timer's going to go off and it's going to be my turn. We're going to switch to working on my image. And we're going to go back and forth. You get a total of four minutes, but it's in 30 second chunks working with Wade than me,

then Wade than me. Each of us does four mini sessions. The goal is to end up with two pictures that look exactly like what Wade and I have pulled up on our screens in front of us. Oh, I know it'll be that way. I'm sure it will. I know it will. You're a great drawer, I believe in you. And Wade, I guess whenever you're ready, I'll just hit my timer and you just, and Mark, I assume you're ready.

Yeah, I'm ready. Always. Whatever, just tell me when to go, Bob. Just start, just go. All right, so Mark, quick over. We're going to have Santa standing in front of a white bed sheet background. Like he was filming a threatening video or something, but the background is kind of like a wrinkly white bed sheet.

Winkly white bed sheet. What? Santa's mouth you can't see because of his beard. He looks very surprised facing the camera. Well, okay, okay, hold on. He's wearing minion goggles. White on. and his coat is open,

exposing a white t-shirt underneath. Okay, hold on. Wait, hold on. Say all, wait, okay, what the fuck? Background, white bed sheet, wrinkly, Santa facing the camera. Yeah, I got that. How do I draw it?

It's already white. Booty, booty, booty, boob's turn. All right, Mark, we have a race horse running from right to left. It's a grass, like, track, and there's green hedges in the background, and there's a white fence behind the horse. The horse does have some details to it, but yeah, it's like a brown horse running from right to left.

Kind of in the, yeah. Yep, just like that. Yep. That's what horses look like. Uh-huh. That's kind of what horses look like. Hold on. Wait for it.

No, that felt, that felt mean, but like that is, that's pretty, that's better than I could do for a horse. I do have to give that to you that. And it does have a saddle. It has like socks, has like white socks on its legs, but then the rest of it's brown. White? White. White. Okay.

Done. Oh, took time. Okay, continue. All right, Mark, back to Santa. Santa, uh, minion goggles. Thick minion goggles. He looks very surprised. Believe it or not, he's not all beard.

There is a face tucked in where the eyes are. The minion goggles are black. Uh, fucking. Santa jacket. Open, expose him the white t-shirt underneath. The white t-shirt. Perfect. Great.

This is a big belt. And on its goal. It's got to be gold. Oh, Bob Stern. All right, so we have a brown horse. We got a brown horse. White socks on its legs that come like, you know, they come up the first part, I don't know, his shins, whatever. And the rest of the horse is brown and it has a saddle that's a little black seat on a primarily white, sattily bit.

A little black seat on a primarily white, sadly bit. Yeah. So that's, yeah, yeah, I like that. I love that. That's good. Primarily white, sadly bit? It's primarily white. just like a little black seat on the top.

And time. Okay. All right, Mark, you need to fill in the, fill in the hat. The little white ball is definitely there at the end of Santa's hat. So put that in. Yep, it is. It's there, man. All right.

His arms are to his side. They're drooping down. All right. Drooping down. You can see a little bit of red under the little, you know, the vesty part of of Santa's thingy. There's a little bit of red on the right side. A little red on the right side.

What, what the, what the, His nostrils are a little puffed out a little bit. Yeah, perfect. You can't see his mouth. All beard. Bigger beard. All beard. Yep.

Okay. Hold on. All right. Back to the horse. Oh, fuck. I really want to work on the background here. We got green grass. We got a white fence behind the horse.

And then we got green hedges. It's a lot of green. It's very green. I would love, yeah, yeah. Green grass. I love where the horse is at. So I think this is a good thing to spend some time on here. Green hedges.

And the hedges go all the way to the top of the frame. They're very tall hedges. Okay. All right. I see. Oh, you even got the gap. I was going to say, there's a gap around the horse's head in the, in the hedges. Perfect.

Oh, yeah, there is. On purpose. And then the only thing you're missing is there's a white fence. It's like, not right now. There's not. Time's up. All right. Okay.

Let's get a bigger beard for Santa and fill in that jacket a little bit. It's huge. What do you mean? I'm going to be bigger. Perfect. We need a bigger beard. It hangs down over his chest. I'm working on it.

Great. All right, awesome. There it is. Asking you shall receive. Now cover that belt up with more white. There's no belt. No belt? Cuts off his belly button.

He has a belly button out? Is his belly button out? No, no. His shirt's covering his belly button. Yes, it's hidden under the shirt. You can barely see it. Is he bare chested? It's a white shirt

All right, I gotta build this I gotta build this guy layer by layer man He's gonna white shirt, red jacket, beard, face The thing Wait, right, just fucking, oh no No, no Oh, is that supposed to be Santa? Cause I, man, how many fingers?

Is this AI Santa? Meadley, needily, needily, My turn, back to the horse. The horse is great. White fence, right? White fence, yep. It's like a third of the way down from the top It's like the horizontal part of the fence

And then it has like every 10 feet There's a stick. So not a lot of sticks, you know? Okay. Yeah, yeah. Yep, white fence. All right. I would say the only note I have is the horse is brown. It's all brown.

And then he has like a black nose. So if you want to fill in the horse a little bit, oh, that's so good. They have the white socks. Good catch. Good catch. Yep, yep, yep. Beedlily doodoo.

Back to meat. This is the final round. You've got to really polish up the details on Santa we gotta really tone up those eyes and nostrils a little bit Santa's gotten hit by the cloud of smoke uh huh

I mean he's got that's a beard what do you mean cloud of smoke? Oh whatever it is I want to make sure I see those those little nostrils the nostrils yep all right honestly no notes that's pretty good that's pretty much him put a little white ball at the end of his hat you can have it on the right side of the head no I got you I got you

that. All right. I'm just going to stop there. I'll send you the picture. Wade's done. Wade's satisfied with this. Are you yielding the remainder of your time? Doesn't matter.

It's up. Back to the horse. It's looking great. It does have a black like nose mouth area. Yep. You're already on that. Uh-huh. The socks are good.

Look at this cocky smile on him. Look, I thought I was going to leave this out. But he has like black shin guards on his front legs. So he does have like with the black shin guards like that? Just like the front part. Yeah, perfect. Oh my God. On the back ones? No, just on the front ones. Just on the front ones. Okay, gotcha. Um, and I guess his feet, like his hooves are brown below his socks still. I just, we're just in the details now, really here. Time's up. Oh. I love it, Mark. All right, here's the images, Mark, so you could share him. There's mine. Okay. All right. Can't wait for this. I started off with a simple of his images if I could. I want you to know that. Why didn't you tell me to start with a gray background? It's a white sheet. It's just dark.

Oh, aspect ratio. Oh, Santa. It's the same picture. I mean, the nose, actually? I got to be completely honest. Wade, this is substantially your fault. I can't be really honest. The bit here is to laugh at Mark struggling,

but man, every time it was your turn and you started describing stuff, I was immediately like, why is that what you're telling him? More white. I don't know. It just felt right. It felt right. Ultimately ended up pretty good, minus the arms. Just wait till you see the comparison with them one I was working on.

You're going to shit. I'm going to shit. Wait, let me get to the toilet first. Oh, man. Everybody listening and watching. It's mostly watching probably, actually, if we're honest, watch out. Oh, that's actually really good. It's fantastic.

Wow. You know what? You're killing it. He actually even nailed the left leg perfectly. I know. When he started drawing the horse, I was like, oh, how do I describe the position? And then he, like, he was doing it. And I was like, I don't have to describe anything.

Mark knows what horses look like, I guess. I wish he knew what Santa looked like by default. That would help me. This is a horse run. I've never seen, you know. I couldn't possibly imagine what that could be. I think I did pretty damn good here. I think that's fantastic.

I think you, mine is the winner, which means I get a point. I'm not writing it down, but you can. Mark and I get a point. Who's competing? I don't even know. I mean, it doesn't matter. You did a great job, Mark. You killed that one.

Thanks, thank you. Thank you. Plus, your horse looks so happy. Your Santa looks like he fell off a roof. His arm was broken. It looks like he's laying in a seat. snow pile on the ground below the roof he just fell

off of it he's just like I hope Tim Allen shows up soon so I could die To be honest though my Santa looks like he's been kidnapped and he's filming a video begging for his release That's true yeah Both of these have their merits

Yes it's true Excellent work Excellent work That's clearly a gray background It's clearly gray Yeah it's very clearly gray I gotta give that to you, Mark. Given that it's directly next to

a bunch of white. Look, I didn't go to art school. I didn't learn all these fancy colors, okay? It's wrinkly white. I only know the three primary colors. Black, gray, and well, wait, no, you don't know gray. Nah, I fucked the whole thing up.

Yeah, see? You don't even know the primary colors. No, I know the two primary colors. Black and white. All right, new palette. I think that was a lot of time. I think Mark was very comfortable. Oh, boy. I think we could take five seconds off and do 25 second timers.

Don, you want to go first this time? Oh, yes, absolutely. Hold on. I'm going to work in negative space here. That's going to be good for this one. It's happening, so just bear with it. You get reset however you so choose. I'm not going to judge your process.

I just feel like starting from, you know, not white might help wade a little bit. A lot of artists start with a sort of a solid background color, often a dark color, something to really work off of to create, you know, gives you something to contrast with. Oh, Bob, I just looked at my last images. This is going to suck. No, it'll be good. All right, wait.

As soon as I start, click the timer. We're going to do 25 seconds. Yeah, ready to go. Because that was just too much time. I think the Wade's problem was that he felt like he had a lot of time. And he was screwing around too much. Right, right, yeah. Uh-huh.

So anyway, Mark, are you ready? Yes. Okay, here we go. I'm going to give you an overview first. It is a picture of two people sitting on a bench with their two bicycles parked to the left of them. The green grass is underneath the bench on like the bottom fifth of the screen. And then it's blue sky up above. Hold on.

Okay, wait. And it's a kind of cloudy day. So green grass, yeah, yeah. And then there's a bench with two people and they're facing away. sitting on it. Hold on blue sky. Yep. And there's a bench. Bench with two people sitting on it. Nope. Time's up. Oh, okay. Okay. All right, Mark, there's a railroad that hits the side, the middle sides of the screen, like it starts at the top middle, real small. It expands toward us. The railroad's coming toward us. Okay. All right. This is perfect. Is it white or black?

The rails are like a really dark gray and there's some like real dark wood. A little bit bigger, but that's fine. We'll make it work. On the middle of the track, there's a puppy facing to the left side. Elyle, little, little, my turn again. All right, the bench is on the right third. It's centered on the right third. Uh-huh. And it's like a wood bench.

Yeah, you're perfect dead on. It's like a wood bench. Okay, two people are sitting on it. Two people sitting on it. They're looking away from us at some beautiful vista or something. Looking away from. Oh, I see from the behind. Yeah, we're standing behind them.

This is like a, yeah, yeah, perfect. Leidelita, leetleetle! Okay. All right, so Mark, the railroad tracks between each of the track things is gravel. It's like rocky gravel, like light-colored rocks in between all of them, okay? I see we're going for the same color palette again. A little bit of grass growing, but not much. It's just the sparse grass.

Sparse grass, got it. Golden Retriever puppy with a black collar looking wet, like a wet dog facing the left in the middle of the... No, close to the middle, close to the front of the track. This is not a gold... this is grass. This is grass, sparse grass. Yeah, I figured, I was hoping so. Okay, Golden. What do we got?

Golden Retriever puppy. Wet Golden Retriever puppy. Sitting there looking to the left. Looking to the left. Okay, got it. And there's like a sidewalk on the left of the railroad track and more gravel on the right of the railroad track. Sidewalk of the left? Pied, ladle, little.

All right, Mark, you're killing it. I like the person on the left does have their arm up like that. Like, I don't know how you knew that instinctively, but you were dead on. There are two slats on the bench behind their back. So the two wood slats. The only thing else that there is is there's two bicycles to the left of them. Like they rode their bikes here and they parked them. And then the sky is a little cloudy.

And at the very top, there's like, it's like we're under a tree taking the picture. Leet, a lead, a lead, a lead. We'll get to it. It's going to be great. All right. Sidewalk on the left with a little bit of grass in between. Just a little gap of grass in between. Sidewalk.

Oh, look at that sidewalk. I love that. Gravel to the right of the track. This is a gravel gray. It sure is. Puppies wearing a black collar with a little black nose, little dark eye. Uh-huh. Hey, loodle, a little.

All right, Mark, you got one bicycle. All you need is one more bicycle. And then it's literally just a little bit of clouds, a little bit of leaves at the top, like a tree is dangling above us. Like a tree is dangling above us, okay? Yeah, yeah, beautiful. Yep. Mm-hmm.

The bicycle. I love that. They are different colors. And the left one is a darker color. I don't know how you're just reading these things instinctively from what I'm giving you. Tree on the left. Tree on the left. Tree above.

It's like we're standing under a tree branch. You can't see this. Leet, a little, a little, lead. No, you good. You're good. Are we doing more? Are we stopping?

One more, right? All right, one more. I wasn't keeping track. I didn't count this time. All right. Coming out of the rails, just a little bit of like blocks of wood where the red is. So it's like a little bit of wood before you get to that metal in the middle. So just put some like dark, you know,

whoa, not the whole thing. thing. What? Just little blocks, like a little, it's like a brick. Like a brick is sticking out from the side of the rail like that big. Yeah. There? On each side for each rail. Yep. Perfect. Perfect. I got no more notes. I'm feeling pretty confident. Kedl, it'll, ladle, little. All right, you can't see the tree trunk. I was misleading you. It's just green leaves, just like wispy leaves. And then it's just some clouds. It's kind of a beautiful blue sky, but a little cloudy, like nice summer clouds. That's it, baby. We have a couple more clouds. A couple more clouds.

Are they cumulonimbus? Yeah, the cool kind. The cool kind. Yeah. Oh, man, I love cloudy trees. Watch this. Watch this. I don't think I could even add any more notes if I wanted to.

Leita, lead, a lead, elite. You killed it, Mark. Thank you, Sense. Here, here you go. Here's your fur. Here's my. Oh. I told you you absolutely slayed this one.

I see. I see. I see. Oh, my. Oh, my God. Oh, that's a big image. Biggest picture ever taken. You know what?

Damn. Yeah, I put the clouds too high, but that was my assumption being in the sky and all. I was not going to get hung up on that because at the end there, we were tight on time. No, I like, and the lady has her arms up, and you have your arm up. It's around the other person, but like, and the left bike is black and the right bike is white, but you have a dark blue and then like a gray. That's a, you know. Wow.

I think that's a great recreate. I think you nailed it again. I feel great. I feel great about this. All right. There's puppy. I see what you were trying to describe now.

Wait, the fucking... I don't know what else to call those. I'll be see. They're like little bricks. He made them. They did the bricks. I think that's a river to the left.

I don't think that's a sidewalk. I think it is. It's very fuzzy and I'm very old. But okay, you know, actually, I was prepared to be like, What an idiot, this guy can't describe anything. This guy's the worst describer in the world. I was ready to be all like, this guy's never even seen a railroad. But no, you know what?

You defied my expectations. Thank you. Thank you. It's just little bits of grass, mostly on the left, but there is some on the track behind the puppy's nose. I get it. I get it. Yeah. No, I think actually, especially if,

If it was like cropped in a little bit so that just the train track was bigger, I think what Mark captured there is pretty spot on. Yeah, I was trying to begin to describe that it hit the side of the frame, but like that's hard to just, it's hard to describe when you have 10 seconds to do it. See, I knew he'd be good at this. Is this enjoyable, Mark? I was thinking you'd enjoy this. Yeah. Oh, God. It's super fun.

Yeah, for me. Because we've played this game a couple times, but you were, you were always on the, you were the describer. Yeah. And I feel like Wade and I are not good drawbacks. which is not your fault. I don't know if I'm good at either end of this part, but I'm going to keep doing it. I can't disagree. All right, one more.

I do feel like we had a lot of time on that one. We're burning through more time. Should we just do one more image, Bob, or should be? Yeah, let's do one more. Let's do one more. I think we should knock 10 seconds off of there. Oh, are you sure? I think we should bump it down to 15.

I have a simple one. Why's there no bucket tool? Oh, there's a bucket tool. This can be really with the blue background. All right. I love it. What? Do you want a different one?

No, no, blue? No, this is perfect. Honestly, perfect. No, no. Okay, good. Oh, I just say it like, this, you blue idioter. This blue background loser. Because when Bob and I were thinking about describing our image is what we were thinking

on, we started with a blue canvas. Well, I can change it at any moment. Bob, I'm skipping to number four, which is really stupid of me, but I'm skipping the number four for myself. Yeah. No, okay. So we'll do 15 seconds. I think I'm my first this time.

Your first this time. How many rounds do you want to do at 15 seconds? Yeah, I think maybe we should do five rounds. Give an extra round here. Gets some time to polish it up a little bit. Mark, whenever you're ready? All right, I'm ready. Okay, Mark, imagine you're sitting in a passenger seat of a car

and you're looking at the rear view mirror. And you see in the rear view mirror reflection of the car, but then around it you see sky, a couple towers, and a bit of road under the mirror. I don't want to be this guy, but I think he means side view mirror to begin with, but Oh, heidel, ital, ital, ital, et al, oh, fuck. This is a close-up picture of a bright red twisty slide. It's about halfway up.

It's a picture of the twist. The whole frame is the slide. Okay, whole frame is the slide. A child is going down the slide wearing blue shoes. All you could see is their feet because they're coming around the backside of the twist. Dital-a-l-l-l-l-l-eat. Okay, okay. All right.

Side view. side view mirrors, just erase that. Erase it? Are you sure? Yep. Side view mirror coming out of the left side of the frame. Coming out of the left side of the frame. Yes.

So like, yes, perfect. And there's like a reflection of the road and like a bus coming up from behind, a dotted white line. The sun is in the, the middle of the rear view mirror on the horizon. And it'll wait a little, little. Okay, okay, okay. All right, Mark, you're getting really close already, but there's a kid wearing blue shoes coming down the slide. and all you can see is their feet going from left to right, poking around the like bend, right?

Because it's a swirly around slide type of situation. Yep, hold on. I think you're killing it. I see where you're going with this. Lead a little, lead, a lead, oh, fuck. All right, so a car. You see a reflection of the car in the left side of where the sun is. So put a reflection of like the window, a door handle.

What colors car? Can I ask that? What? What colors car? It's hard to tell. Probably like a dark orange, like a rusty colored car. I feel like that's an important detail. It's hard to tell, man.

It's really actually hard to tell. Lidal, ladle, ladle! All right. Yeah, you're killer. I like where we're at here. It's like a swirly around slide. So like all you see is the feet in the middle of the frame kind of peeking around going from left to right. Going from left to right?

Yeah, so it's like swirling around, right? So they're-Leedle-Leedle-Leedle-le- Oh, fucking hell. All right. Draw a little bit of a horizon below the sun. So like a flat line. Perfect. Now put a dotted line in the middle of that going down. Dotted line in the middle of that going down.

Yeah, that's the road. And there's a bus on the other, the right side. The right side is there's like a bus coming up. Perfect. And now outside the mirror, there's two towers. Oh, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo. Okay. I basically got like blue jeans.

Just going to be like, all we see our legs, right? Always see our legs. Yes, perfect. That is exactly right. That's so perfect. And the background behind the side is like trees, but they have like a little boca. Like they're very out of focus trees.

It's just a little, just a little green. Lidl, Lidol, lead, elit. All right, Mark, so we need the horizon outside the window here, outside the mirror here. And then there's two big, like,

radio towers coming up on the right side, and then more road underneath. Yep. You got it. Two towers, a little bit of grass under the towers,

and then it's road. Oudel, loodle, little, little, little, little, little sparse some or other. Yeah, it's just, It's just like there's a bunch of trees in the background. They're just kind of out of focus.

Boca. Yeah, Boca. Boca them. Boca dees nuts. Boca. Boca. Leet, a lead, a lead, a lead, all right. So a little bit of grass.

No, that's it. Nope. Done. Oh, that's it? I thought that was four. Is that five? That was five. I was checking them off.

I left one off. All right, we're done. I don't feel so confident about this. The slide situation is crazy right now. That's exactly what it looks like. even worry about it. All right. Here you go, Mark.

Oh, man, you're right. It was hard to tell the color of the car. Yeah, it's surprisingly difficult to tell the color of the car. I would guess black. Yeah, it looks like a dark colored car. It's a look like it's got a little bit of rusty colored around the mirror. It's the only reason I said like a dark orange. That's just the sun glaring on the plastic because it looks like a plastic mirror

surround. Well, yeah, but it could be any color that's a darker color or like a, yeah, it's hard to tell. Okay, I see what you're going for. Yeah, I get it. I think you nailed it. I thought this guy was like fully out of the window looking in the side. But then I would have seen him in the reflection. I should have from the context clues, you know, I should have known.

Our goal was to start off with the simple of an image and then go much more complex. So this is the most complex one I had. I feel like my image got simpler. I just honestly couldn't figure out how to explain it in a way to get to get it across to Mark very well. I think it was on me this time for my image. Oh, okay. All right. I was not able to imagine this, but I so get you. Those legs. I don't know this slide shape very well, because I don't know, I haven't been to a playground in a while. You mean me going like this wasn't enough information for you?

Oh, I wasn't looking at you. I wasn't looking at that. Go on, man. Come on. This is the, uh, the cursed, mine is the cursed slide that makes you long. It's a wanka slide. It stretches you out and makes you wobbly. It looks like the Wicked Witch's legs if the house lands on her, but then she went down to slide afterward,

like, I lost my slippers. I'm going down to slide. A lot less tree than I thought, a lot more slide than I imagined. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I gotta say, I think Wade, yeah, Wade has it, but I'm not the judge, so what do I know?

Oh, I don't disagree. I think Wade definitely took that one. I think that was, I think that was Wade. Our middle round were both pretty good. First round was definitely Bob. Man, there's so much going on in these. Like, Bob's image, it's all about how complicated the slide is. Mine, there's just so much shit in the image to describe.

See, these don't have to be a punishment. No, they're delightful. That was stressful for Mark. That was stressful. Should we save our other images, Bob, or should we share what we were going to give them? Oh, I'll share mine. I honestly couldn't decide for sure which one of these last two I had left was worse. But that was the last one I was going to go with.

Oh. Oh, God, the hands. Oh, God. Yeah, the hands. I don't know how he would have described that. I think maybe, but oh, it would have just looked like a wash of brown. I feel like you either would have got it, but it would have been hard to draw, or I would never have been able to explain it to you,

and you would never even have understood what the fuck was going on in that one. Yeah, I don't think I would have. A ring of hands grabbing wrists of the hand nearest. There's six hands. I would have said there are six people who are all grabbing. grabbing each other's wrist, creating a hexagon of hands. Let's see, if you'd just said people, I would have zoomed it out in my head very far. I would have drawn people.

Ah, yeah, yeah. There are six hands. There are six hands grabbing each other. All right. So the next thing we have. Do you have your words? I do. I just pulled them up.

We have words. I have found three words. Wade has found three words. We're going to send them to you, and then you have to get the other person who doesn't know the word to guess. it. And you get to decide how you give us clues. You have to say it backwards or you have to give us more direction. And I alternate or, uh, so Wade goes first because he has found the shortest word, but then we just go back and forth. So Wade goes first giving you the word, which means

I go first guessing. Here's your first word mark. All right. And you can either say it backwards or let him pick a word and then you say more or less or whatever. I feel like this would be easier if I just say it backwards. I'm here for it. Okay. Aramac. Aramaic. Camera.

Yeah. Perfect. Wow. Easy. Easy. That would take it forever if it was guessing which way the words go. Oh, God. Yeah.

Well, given that Wade and I discussed how difficult we wanted to make these words, I feel a little bit worse about the words that I have decided to choose. Oh, mine get worse. Don't worry. Once again, I started off. We were warming up, but it gets... Maybe mine just start bad and stay just as bad, and it's totally doable. Mark, there's your first word from me.

He's never going to know what that is. Sorry. He might. He knows silly words. Okay. Wade, you ready? Yeah. Lebesage.

One more? Lebesage. Wea or leh? Le. Le. Buzedge Lebezege Jezebel

Jezebel Jezebel Beautiful Ha ha ha See? There he goes I told you he knows Goofy ass words

All right Okay good That's nice Am I crushing it Or are you guys crushing it? I mean it's got to be Mark crushing it Bob

Are you ready? Oh I'm ready I'm gonna just stick with backwards Because otherwise We'll be here all day All right Okay I'm sounding into my head

and this is going to sound like I'm joking. I'm not. Ketchup. Ketchop. Ketchup. Ketchup. Ketchup. Ketchup.

Pach tech. Ketchup. Pachu. Ket. Ketchup. It's definitely Ketchup. I'm going to done it wrong. I was so stuck on the ketchup.

I realize that might be leading you astray. I mean, you could say it more times backwards. Can I? He gets a other shot, right? Yeah, you could, I think you can keep pronouncing it. Kets yep. Ketch yep. Ketch yep.

Paycheck. Yeah, there it is. Yeah. See, see? All right. I gotta be honest, I tried to pick one that I thought you couldn't say backwards. Because I thought that you would want to rely on the saying it backwards. saying it backwards. And so I try. This is purposefully one that I think it's going to be

really fucking hard to say backwards. Ready, win? Oh, hit me. Are ye lofty? Laftus. Are ye lofty? Sit folia. I. What is Deju? What is Deju? What are you typing this out? Yeah, it helps me.

Ah, e. Ah, ye laughed soon. Shit, shit, failure. Shit, shit. Is it shit? I laughed too. I laughed zz. I laugh. So.

I do think it's good at the beginning Usefulness Oh no no I love to I don't know what What do you do it just do it backwards man Ziu Uwis Oh fail useful Oh no no

I loft so I loved so I loved so Outs Ose, Ose. Ose. This turned it so promising. What happened?

This is a word that has been the focus of previous episodes. This is a word that is related to us. I laughed so. Osefulia. Us. What, how, what are you? Ose. I'm just going to tell you, you're converting that part wrong when you're saying it backward.

I love to. I e Lof Soos Lihah. God, this is making me angry. I loft so. I loft so. Ah, e, loft, so. Instead of so, we're ose.

No. How are you doing that? So. W. Woss. I-e-loft-sov. I laugh so. Uh-huh.

Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Whoa. Whoa. I laugh Siu. See. So. Whoa-e, stuffalia.

Whoa, woee. Woo-y slough. I don't know if we could count that. Yeah, that was really. close but... Weesphalia. Oweecephalia. Oh, what?

West, Westphalia. Oh! Holy shit. You know, that treaty or whatever it was? Oh, my God. Yeah, my brain was not going

to Westphalia. Give Bob a hard one. Give him a hard one. Yeah, no, let's do this. First guess. Let's go, Mark. I feel like I want a harder word than what I had picked.

I wasn't that, mean. Yeah, get a hard. That's what I was saying. Hey, get him a hard one. Yeah, hold on a second. That's a word that we've talked about on multiple episodes of this show. And have never gotten right when it comes up.

But you reference it all the time. There have been so many bits where there's like, oh, I can't remember the Treaty of Westphalia. You're right. You're right. I did think that one would be hard to say backwards, but Mark actually did a pretty good job of it. Yeah, thank you. Are you finding a new word, Wade? No, I'm keeping mine

I wanted to but I'm looking I'm like I'll just keep mine Alright alright alright Alright man I guess here Have it on easy mode Okay here we go First try Mm-hmm

Regra besiech Holy monkey Cheeseburger Yeah Yeah To be fair when I chose these words I thought some of them would be the other version

of us getting to them, but well done. That's fair. That's fair. That's fair. Yeah, I guess it was my mistake for letting, uh, letting Mark choose. Obviously, one of those is way harder than the other, I guess. Although I feel like when we did the saying it backwards the first time, it was like fucking pulling teeth the whole time. And then this time magically, me guessing. Well, you are guessing, though. And you've done a pretty good job, except for the Westphalia, but that was a hard word. That was a hard word.

This one is so hard. I can't tell if I'm spelling it right. Hang on. Oh, God. I really don't know if you could do this one saying it backwards, but it's up to you, buddy. I got a bonus one for Mark to send you. All right. You ready? Oh, yeah. Ginninoyed knockri. The fuck?

He's casting a spell on you. Don't look him in the eyes. Ginninuitid na cray. One more time. Gennon oitidnachry. Yarkin titgaining. Yarkin titning. It's not even English.

It's an old Norse word or something. Yeah. Gennonoitidnaugrey. He didn't actually get it, though. That felt like you might have believed that. Okay, we got Ray at the end. The opposite of Ray is yarr, right? Oh, man.

I think we learned the last time my brain works different on this than your guys does. It does. It really does. It really does. I hear Ray, I think R-A-Y, so I'm like backwards, Y-A-R. Whereas you guys are like, the way you think about it is different. Like Mark ended cheeseburger with a I would never have done that because it's H-C.

Okay, it's, you know, I see where your logic is going. But, you know, there's other options too. I'll just say that. Okay, so the array, be air? air air conditiening air conditioning

there it is there it is I love the way that you just say it just slightly wrong and you're like air conditianing that's not a word okay I got there pretty quick from that one all right no you did

it's just so fun to watch here here mark bonus one for Bob oh I have a bonus one all right First guess. All right, yeah, I'm ready. I'm ready. Bob, I went up in letters more. Okay, good.

Okay. Obatiripakna. Oh, man. Can you say it one more time? Obottyri pachna. Obokniripata. Is it start with an L? L?

I can't. I don't think I can give those kind of details. But I believe phonetically I'm doing it as it should be. I will say. I think the third syllable in what Mark's saying is the hardest part to pronounce. Yeah, Obatairi Bachta could be more accurate.

This is where I always worry we're going to summon a demon by doing this game because just randomly we're going to say a demon's name. And we're saying it so many times, like we're chanting it. Cool. Uncarborated. No.

No, fuck. Old Bat diary, Pakna. The first bit is really fucking me up. I can't tell what the end of the word is. Yeah, I, if, yeah, if you, it's not a word you would use casually in day-to-day conversation. That's for sure. I don't know if I can get this. Uncabin.

Pachna. Pachna. Uncap. Pa-oh. Pa-paw. Pa. Uncup Oof

Un... Pock Pock Puck Uncop Uncop Oba dear Tyree

Uncomplicated No Uncom Obat Tyree Pock Oba Tyree E

Tyree Right Right Right write, albatair rewrite, tabl. Oh. Uncopyrightable?

Yay! That's a very difficult one. Oh, that is a long word. All right, I do know that word. So how did you pronounce it backwards, Mark? I just want to say how Obattyri Pachna. Here's how I would have pronounced it backwards

because the way my brain works. I would have said Elbath Giri Pachnu. No one would have gotten it. But see, for me, that's how I think of it. You're trying to actually read it backwards. Yeah, because then I'm like, okay, L-B-B-B-H-H-B-H-T-A-B. So it would be backwards.

It would be H-T-A-B. Like, that's how my brain processes it. I'm just trying to emulate what it would sound like if it was actually backwards. And then obviously the editors should play it forwards or my backwards, backwards. You might be actually phonetically pronouncing it backwards. But for me, I'm like, oh, okay, this is how I'd say it if it was backwards. I see, I see. Just the way our brains work differently is interesting.

Anyway, I think we can all agree. Mark wins. Hey! Yeah, boy! I wrote down points. Seven points or just dashed dot and line points? Although those are definitely seven, that's seven points. Oh, that's pretty good.

Seven and nothing. Mark wins. All right. Mark, do you want to give your winner's speech? I thank you for this opportunity to showcase my amazing abilities of both pronouncing things backwards and drawing. I will retire from this podcast henceforth, because I can go no further in my abilities as a betterterter and presenter.

And I think exiting with grace is the only thing right for me at this time. I now hand it off to me for the loser's speech. Ah, you didn't lose. If anyone lost, we lost. I was going to be like, I'll never give up. Ah, I may have lost this one, but I'm going to come back stronger next time. Cut out my interruption. Let him do his bit. All right, look, I may be beaten this time. And I may have lost horribly, but you know.

know one thing about me, I never give up. I never quit. I'll be back again next week for that crown. And until I get that crown, I'm never giving up on myself or you or this old podcast. Oh, you can bet on me being here every time because I am not ever going to quit. Don't do the outro too. I don't know if we have anything else to add at this point. Yeah, that's the end. It's time for the outro. That's how this works. Mark will be hosted next week. I feel like we've turned a new leaf on the one-man shows. I've got to be honest. I thought it was Instead of being us torturing Mark, I thought it was a real showcase of Mark. I thought that was lovely.

I had a lot of fun. If I'm not having fun, what are we doing here? Why are we even on this planet? Life's about fun and nothing else. Yes, great message. Yeah. Make sure you follow the podcast so you know when the episodes come out. We're down to one a week right now, but that might change.

You got a lookout. Also check out the merch. Distractable store. Shop. That's not right. No. Distractable. dot shop. Yeah,

Distractable. That's the one. Still haven't learned it. Follow the guys. Mark Blyer, Lord Minion 777, Remenian 777, 7. I am Ice Kerm. Mark hosts the next one. I think we all know what it's gonna be. We all know for sure.

Prison tattoos. No, that's not, it wasn't a perfect crime. Yeah, prison tattoos. We're giving each other prison tats. Uh-huh. I want a dick butt on my butt. More on my dick. Ooh. Anyway, until then, that's the end, and I'm not going to let Wade participate in the outro at all.

Podcast out! It's too late. Can't do it.