Distractible - Rage

Episode Date: June 9, 2023

Mark urges the guys to dig deep and find moments in their past full of unbridled rage... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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That's just $267 bi-weekly. Cash value of $40,294. Plus, eligible Ford owners get a $1,000 bonus. For details, visit your local Ford store or Ford.ca. Good evening, gentle listener, and welcome to Marketractable. This week, the gents bravely drop shields about their shadow selves. Mark judges, chides Wade's sandwiches, and asks the gents to discuss their Hulk-out moments. Carnivorous Wade hams up his hyper-lubricated throat but opens up about his one berserk battle.

Bob defends condiment usage but is deeply irked by Californian circumnavigations. From mayonnaise ass, Ed, to defeating inner darkness. Yes. It's time for

Rage. Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show. of what we talk about, and I will be judging the entries and stories of my fellow, well, not hosts right now, but fellow podcasteers, Bob. Hello. And Wade. Hey. Hi. You almost just bestowed host powers upon us.

That would have been quite the misstep, I have to be honest. That would have been great. Can we have a triple host episode? Is that even possible? I mean, yeah, I think they just call that a podcast. No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. That's not what it is.

No. This is how all podcasts run. They revolve hosting. It is kind of an interesting conundrum to him. People don't know but us like rotating the host was like a very last minute idea when we were brainstorming what the actual like quote official podcast would be and i think it was like we would just take turns we were originally going to be like specific roles in the podcast one of us is going to be like always host and the others

are going to have supporting roles yeah story like story, like story getter or something. I think you want to be story. I was going to be researcher and I would do it live. But yeah, no, this is better this way. I like the ramshackle thing. Yeah, absolutely. Slapped together. That's our style. It's more us.

Yeah. But we could make this. We could change it now. I'm the host. I could decide what we do from here on out and then I can make it forever that we do it in perpetual host. Me as the perpetual host. Me. As the perpetual host. Well. I could declare that.

Or you could. We could put a pin in that one. We could just undo it next week. I could. But you could. No, because you won't be host next week. I'll be the host. Wouldn't I always be host if I was perpetual host? I would always be host. I'm perpetual host. If I declare that I'm perpetual host. Yeah, I'm perpetual host. I will always be host. I will

always be host. I will always be host. I will always be host. I guess we did give you that power. Yes, I have that power. That means Bob and I would never have to come up with topics. Yes, and then I would be the arbitrator of everything that we do. Beautiful.

It would be... Show up and phone it in. Mark Attractable and Friends. Mark Attractable and friends. Markiplier is your welcome distractible. Yes, exactly. Yes. All right, fine.

It seems like you guys aren't into it. Maybe the rest. Markiplier is your podcast. I feel like it's only halfway there. There's just some more brainstorming we need, you know? Maybe we need to take turns hosting. What about that? That's something. That's something. need, you know? Maybe we need to take turns hosting. What about that? That's something.

That's something. Anyway, how are you guys doing? I'm having the weirdest case of Deja Mustard right now. How are you guys doing? That's a lot from DBZ Abridged. I'm good. I'm doing good. I'm having a good day.

My office is not hot. I don't know if I talked about this, but I have a spoiled bottle of mayonnaise with me and i i just don't have the wherewithal to get rid of it you know no you haven't carried around with you or just in your office uh it's in my office okay i thought maybe you just carried it around you couldn't bring yourself to get rid of it because you'd been through so much together no it's right here i have a fridge in my office it's only mainly for drinks but i brought this out because i had a snack out here the other day and i was like oh put some mayo on that and i for

some ungodly reason brought this to my office and i put it in the fridge and then i didn't close the fridge so i came back to my office the following day to a fridge that was like 80 degrees and mayonnaise i think probably is no good no more. I would not recommend it. Unless. Unless. I haven't tried it. You know, I. Hold on a second.

It smells like mayonnaise. Wait. How. I thought you just ate some like flat straight up. Wait, wait, wait. When you buy mayonnaise, it's not refrigerated. But it's sealed. Yeah, it's airtight sealed.

Once you open it, you introduce other things into it, potentially. It's like that old experiment where the guy had meat, and he was like, oh, flies just appear on this meat. And the meat that was sealed didn't have flies, but the meat with the hole got flies. It's kind of like that kind of thing. Yeah, I've got fly mayonnaise. Commercially produced mayonnaise, as opposed to homemade mayonnaise,

does not need to be refrigerated even after opening but that's horrific why does it say wait bob the thing should say does it say on it keep refrigerated does it say does it say refrigerate after opening it would say if you had to 12 fluid ounces picture of a baby that's why i bought it because i have one of those okay i have one of those i like mayonnaise look at this since 1919 cupi mayonnaise that's not the one that we need ingredients contains eggs refrigerate after opening do not freeze but it says food scientists find it's because mayo undergoes strict testing and its acidic nature slows the growth of bacteria associated with foodborne illnesses. I mean, this is a very common, Kewpie is a very popular common brand, but it's not like it's Duke's or like Hellman's or something. It's a different kind of mayonnaise, right?

It has a two-way chef cap. What if that's too fancy to be unrefrigerated? But that's the thing, right? People, I have this perception that mayonnaise, if you left it out, it would become horrible very quickly. But it wouldn't. Chug that bottle. Chug it.

Chug it. Go for it, man. I'll give you 10 points if you chug it. Okay, I'll chug the bottle. Here we go. Ten points if you chug it. Okay. I'll chug the bottle.

Here we go. Oh, so much mayonnaise. Okay. So I'm got in my mouth. I don't like that. Wow. You should be an actor. So I'm definitely got in my mouth.

How'd it taste? It's kind of like I ate some mayonnaise while I have a Jolly Rancher in my mouth. Do you have a Jolly Rancher in my mouth how did it taste it's kind of like i ate some mayonnaise while i have a jolly rancher in my mouth do you have a true in your mouth because yeah i do i i wasn't quite we hit record and you were like let's go and i was like oh i'll finish this jolly rancher as we start the episode it's not gone yet i've been trying to tuck it under weren't you prepared to eat man i mean i should show up prepared to chug mayonnaise. Yeah, we all should. So that is on me. It's one of those things where it's like,

if it did taste like there was a dollar entry, it would prove that it was spoiled. But I think because it tastes like mayonnaise, I don't think mayonnaise spoils. And I think this is a divisive issue. I think a lot of people think you need to refrigerate a lot more things than you really do. Probably. Because if you go to restaurants all the time, ketchup and mustard is left left out but where do people put their ketchup in their home usually it's in the fridge well the fridge is convenient but i've seen people keep ketchup in the pantry ketchup and mustard are very acidic like a different level of acidity than just mayonnaise

are you sure about that yes because they have like vinegar in them as an ingredient. What do you think mayonnaise have? Mayonnaise should be a fat emulsified into another fat. It should be egg yolks emulsified into an oil or something. The ingredients for this mayonnaise are soybean oil, egg yolk, water, distilled vinegar, salt, sugar, mustard, flour, rice vinegar. Mayonnaise isn't supposed to have vinegar in it. Mayonnaise is an egg yolk. That's a corkscrew mayonnaise. That's homemade mayonnaise. No, homemade mayonnaise is an egg yolk emulsified into an fat,

an oil of some sort. What does emulsified into even mean? It means you blend it into it, and it becomes a suspension where the fats mix together because they are not naturally attracted to each other so you force it by blending it to be mixed into a homogenous mixture the emulsification that's how you know how salad dressing can like separate when salad dressing is all mixed up it's emulsified but it can separate because the oil and the non-oils are not naturally attracted to each other. So homemade mayonnaise would be that, but apparently preserved with a stir-fry mayonnaise.

But that's normal mayonnaise. You don't put vinegar in normal mayonnaise, do you? Mayonnaise needs an acid. It's lemon. You put lemon in it. It's an acid. It could either be lemon or vinegar. It's either one of those.

It just needs an acid. I don't like it. I don't like it at all. This is what it is. I'm not saying it's wrong. I'm saying I don't like it. I don't like it at all. This is what it is! I'm not saying it's wrong. I'm saying I don't like it, Mark. I'm allowed to not like things, aren't I? Yeah.

I'm with Bob. I also don't like mayonnaise. You heard it here first. Mark Potter says you have to like everything he likes. That's true. He is the perpetual host. As judge, I declare that you must like what I like. Well, I don't.

So what about that then? Well, I think that you must like what I like. Well, I don't. So what about that then? Well, I think you're dumb. Well, I think you're a very nice man. And this is out of character for you. My day was fine. Thank you guys for asking. Wade, what do you think of mayonnaise? I don't really care for it.

My family likes mayonnaise. I don't. But, you know, it's... Well, you don't like anything. What do you like as a sandwich condiment, though? I like ketchup. Uh-huh. Ketchup. You don't have, like, mustard? You don't have, like...

Ketchup is not a correct answer. If I have a ham and cheese sandwich, it is bread, ham, and cheese. If I go crazy, I might do, like, a ham and turkey and cheese. Why don't you just eat scoops of sand? Jesus Christ. That sounds like the driest, most unpleasant food

I could imagine eating. A sandwich without a sauce on it. Bob's right. It doesn't have to be mayonnaise, but it needs a sauce, Wade. Do you have like a hyper-lubricated throat or something? How do you get that down? I have a beverage with my meal.

If I ate a sandwich with just bread and fillings in it, with no lubrication, no sauce or anything, I would choke on that. I would get halfway through the sandwich and be like, I must have a wide-ass throat, because no, I don't need any of that. I just eat the sandwich. In fact, I usually eat two sandwiches.

Do you dip it in water? I'm not opposed to two sandwiches. I love two sandwiches. Here's what I in water? I'm not opposed to two sandwiches. I love two sandwiches. Here's what I do. I get a slice of bread. I put meat and cheese on it. Put the other slice of bread. Eat.

Or maybe I go crazy and I have a PB&J. I mean, sometimes I just go bonkers here. Those are their own sauces, though. That one totally makes sense. You don't need anything for that. Yeah, that's normal. That is fine. That's fine.

That's fine. That's acceptable. Meat is kind of wetty. Meat? sorry meat is not a sauce are you sloppy you get like a ham you slopping up those steaks you putting water on your lunch meat ham ham is like moist if you have like leftover chicken and you like slice to put on there maybe your chicken is drier after being like you know baked and then whatever but like if you just buy deli meat no deli meat is adequately moist to go forgo any sort of sauce on the sandwich you need some mustard i don't put anything on my burgers other than cheese and bacon i don't put anything on my sandwiches i just like the i like the flavor of it

by itself it doesn't need more but you miss out on a world of flavor there's adaptability i think you conceal some of the flavor by burying it with too many other flavors we've been down this road before and we need to let wayne enjoy what he enjoys but that honestly just sounds so dry and unpleasant a sandwich with no sauce on it sounds just awful to me yes i love a good ham and cheese sandwich with just you defend this is like that that clip from that show is like this is your man that you defend. This is like that clip from that show. It's like, this is your man that you're going to stick by. He's like, that's my man.

Look at me. I'm doing great. I look great. I enjoy food. So do you eat chicken wings with no sauce on them? Just dry, crunchy, throat-destroying wings? I have. I prefer buffalo sauce, but I'll eat them plain.

You have? I'm concerned that you made that choice one single time ever. I can't handle too much heat. I like hot sauce, but it has to be a little bit of it. So a lot of times when I order wings, I order them well done so they stay crispy, and I also get them with light sauce so they're not drowning in sauce. Sometimes they go too light on the sauce, and it's like eating a plain wing, and it's like, this could have used a little bit more, but I'll eat it.

It's fine. You know, they make non-spicy sauces parmesan garlic is possibly one of the best wing flavors that exists i like some of those but i do like a little bit of the buffalo taste without having like the buffalo drowned and like it's stuck in your mouth your lips are burning your hands are burning your you're crying you're like so good you can have the flavor without drowning in the pain i'm generally with you i will say there's something about the sweet spicy korean barbecue wings that this korean place has near us where i don't like spicy food but i eat those and i get thought that i'm all oh god it's so hot but i want more oh there's something about that flavor that's specific Korean. I think it's gochujang, something spicy, sweet, something.

But yeah, the buffalo could be. I'm with you. I'll give you. You know what? I'll give you your chicken wings. Fried sandwich is too far for me. That's a lot. That's too far.

All right. Burger. Plain burger. Okay. That sounds awful. Burger with no aioli. Burger with no ketchup, mustard, relish. Burger with nothing interesting on it.

That's bacon. I'll put some bacon on it that's bacon i'll put i'll put some bacon on it i mean that is good i i'm moving on for now because we could be a whole episode here and i don't want to stick around on this topic forever in the small talk round bob you earned five points i gave you some bonus points for actually tasting the mayonnaise and then wait i gave you three points i didn't deduct anything but i want you to know i should have i should have i really should have thanks anyway would you like you should just say that you like food even if you don't just so you can earn more points on the podcast i'm too really killing honest i know whenever i'm walking into like you guys have like a punching glove extended and I see it spring

loaded I'm like all I have to do is walk around it wait do you like mayonnaise it's like just break it oh no listen it's okay if you don't like mayonnaise I 100% respect that dry sandwich is a lot I'm not even saying that's wrong I'm just saying I can't imagine that that's pleasant I love ketchup I just don't want it on my burgers and stuff because it's like, I don't know, it doesn't do it for me. I couldn't tell you why. Well, then what does it go on? You just eat ketchup on French fries and that's it? I like fried foods with it.

Like if I get like chicken tenders, chicken nuggets, fried fish. All right, no, you know what, Mark? I did the opposite of what you were trying to do. You did the thing. You did the thing. I need to let it go. I need to let it go. We're moving on.

All right. So fries. But how could you? No, I'm sorry. I need to let it go. We're moving on. All right. So. But how could you? No, I'm sorry. I'm going to. Today's topic. This is a good segue because today's topic is moments of unbridled rage. I want to talk about the moments in our lives when we have been at our most angry, whether

it was justified or not, or whether it lasted a long time or not whether we broke something or not times when the unfettered emotion of rage exploded through our very core and uh either resulted in some tumultuous times or otherwise was justified i feel like one of the most rage-filled moments of my entire life is actually captured memorialized as an episode of this podcast so that's a good that's a good one if you haven't listened to the bobs oh you're killing wayne i gotcha i gotcha well i gotcha if you haven't listened to bob's fridge episode uh that's up there for me but I would say the other one that comes to mind

is on the bus in Vegas. I love that. I wish we had that on film. I cannot believe that recording didn't work. And we've talked about that before, I think on this podcast, so I don't have to go into it. But that was completely unjustified rage,

I think is why that stands out to me. Because I don't even remember why i was so mad i was so fucking mad at you guys but i don't remember why it was stupid i don't remember either we'll never know it's gone forever i can't believe it but there i definitely have some like daily rages i have some little ones that come up that i think might surprise you guys cool i have one major one i'm gonna throw it back and we're gonna do titles again so you that come up that i think might surprise you guys cool i have one major one i'm gonna throw it back and we're gonna do titles again so you gotta come up with a clever title we've got bonus points on the line i have a title what's the title all right i need to like wrap

myself up for this i'm gonna it's a rage title right so okay oh great I'll just go around! Alright. Okay. That's good. Wade? I'm not going to say the title with rage. I'm just going to let it speak for itself. I should be in prison. That's very intriguing. That's really intriguing, Wade, but the passion with which Bob delivered his title, I have to go with that one. I'm not excited to talk about this story. It's an awful moment for me, so I don't even want to win. But it's a fitting topic, and I'm too honest.

I'm walking into the glove. I'm excited. I want to hear this. I'm interested. I don't think I know what story you're about to tell, and if I do, I've already forgotten it. So I'm excited either way. So it's my turn. I go?

I'm up? Yes, Bob, please take the floor. Okay. All right. Great. I'll just go around. So this is not, this is a, I'm going to say this is like a summary of a thing that happens that is one of the most quintessentially California things about living here in general.

California things about living here in general. It happens a lot in the car, but it also happens everywhere else. Anywhere humans are moving, this thing happens. And it's a thing I never experienced in Ohio. I lived in Ohio for a long time. North Carolina, lived there for six years. This did not happen. I've been to lots of places around the world and you know traveled to europe and we were very lucky to do the tours and stuff never experienced this as in the same way that it happens in california is the instinct that californians have the moment anything stops you're driving in a lane of traffic you're walking down an aisle in the grocery store you're walking down a sidewalk if a person in front of you stops in california the immediate thought without a moment of even hesitation without slowing down

every californian just thinks ah i'll just go around like there's not some reason that the person in front of you just stopped if you're walking down an aisle at the grocery store and I'm in front of, I'm walking down an aisle at the grocery store and there's a person in front of me grabbing a thing off the shelf and I'm like, oh, I'll just wait. It's a busy aisle. There's people going both directions and it's, I'll just wait a sec.

This person's just grabbing a thing and then they're going to continue. If I stop moving forward for even a millisecond, every other Californian in the entire world is like i'll just go around he's stopping for no fucking reason i'll just go cut him off and they and it's the thing that makes me mad is like they do that and it's like okay well just be patient they do that and then there's like oncoming traffic right someone is trying to walk around me in the grocery store and there's carts coming the other way. So there's no room.

The person who has pulled out into the wrong, you know, the oncoming traffic, so to speak, they're the one who gets like indignant about it. They do this and then they're like, oh, excuse me. And I've seen it happen where the people who are just walking down the aisle from the opposite direction back up and let the person through who's just going around and i'm like don't do that you're rewarding stupid behavior but it happens everywhere and it happens most specifically in traffic if you're in a parking lot my favorite is the the series of oh i'll just go arounds that happen if you're in a parking lot and someone's like waiting for a spot right there's a car backing out you're waiting there's like one guy stopped and then one guy will be like oh i'll just go around but he'll get stopped because the car is backing out and now there's two cars and

a third guy comes and is like i wonder why these two cars are stopped i'll just go around and it's you end up with people like pulling around and around and you like this shit just happens everywhere in california and no matter what context it happens in i am filled with rage but if i'm alone in my car i scream at them because no one can hear me i literally if i'm driving alone in my car and someone does that i'll just i just look over i'm like oh great just go around cool i don't flick them off or anything but i scream at them because it's so cathartic to be able to address the fact that no one in California knows what a line is for or how to wait for five seconds. It's a little thing, but it honestly fills me with rage on a daily basis.

Going out in public. I get pissed just listening to this, dude. You get this everywhere in California. Everywhere. Grocery store. DMV. Really? get this everywhere in california everywhere grocery store dmv you could literally be waiting in a line to check out at a store and someone will come up and and think to themselves like

huh are you in line there's a little tiny gap between your cart and the heels of the person in front of you maybe you're not in line maybe you're just stopped in this aisle for some reason i'll just go around so i can get in line in front of you i have confronted people i'm not like a confrontational person i've confronted people in person where like they did that they tried to cut around me and i was like excuse me why do you think i'm waiting here i am in line please get in line behind me if you would like to and they were always like oh oh i'm sorry if i offended you and i'm like how am i the one who's an asshole in this situation you gotta be fucking kidding me everywhere in california constantly

happens it sends me off on a whole thing like blows my mind there's like three people in ohio that do that and they're always like shamed flipped off and screamed at for like they must be people that are visiting from california i guess yeah because like they're that's kind of rare here and when it does happen that person is very obviously an asshole who has no idea what they're doing and honestly probably deserves to be crucified but you know we don't do that people who are assholes i guess it's kind of an exaggerated punishment but in my brain it's what i want for them oh my god i'm evil so So yeah. Oh great Just go around. There's my thing that I hate this topic mark. I hate it. I love who I love

About I don't love talking about it, but I love hearing about it Wade I can't wait to hear why you should be in prison Dude, I okay. This, okay, this is a story. This is a tale because there's a lot that builds up to the reason. Growing up, I have three siblings, an older brother, an older sister, and a younger brother. And my older brother was notorious for getting into trouble when I grew up. He wasted money, in my opinion, buying, like, the cool gang member car that had the hydraulics, had the big base in the trunk that you could hear from 10 miles away.

The police were called on him for you named the reason so many times growing up. And he and I mean, he and I are starting starting now at this point in our lives. I'm 34 years old. And for the first time, we've had like several civil conversations with each other. And it seems like he's maybe trying to turn his life around finally. But growing up, I hated everything about his existence because he caused our family so much pain and misery over the years. And when I was a teenager, he had moved out and he was doing his own thing.

And it's like, okay, I have to deal with his shit when he comes over. But otherwise, he's gone. Breathing room. Something happened in life where he had to move back in with us when I was in high school. And when he moved back in, all of his bullshit came back with him. I don't want to get into all the specifics because it's kind of like, you know, my family's business and I don't want to air it all out. It's not all my laundry to share. But ultimately, he got into more trouble and his trouble became our trouble.

his trouble became our trouble. And just as a teenager, your hormones and testosterone and everything else kind of fluctuating. And you're more prone, I think, to like emotional outburst. At least I was as a teenager. It's like I had more like moments of unbridled rage feelings that were kind of exaggerated. But with him, it had been a lifetime of buildup. And I remember he'd gotten us in trouble or he'd gotten in trouble and my mom was having to deal with it and she was always very stressed out and stuff and seeing her stressed out pissed me off to no end and there was a day where he came in and she was confronting him about something he had done and he like screamed at her and yelled at her or whatever and it looked like she was on the verge of both killing him and crying and I don't know what had happened to me that day but it was kind of like when Gohan

goes Super Saiyan 2 and Dragon Ball, there was just like a snap, where like the room got dark, there was just a red line going across, and something in me snapped, and I had just had enough, so I went and I got into his face, because I'm also not very confrontational, but I went and I got into his face, and I was like, you need to get away from her, blah blah blah blah, I'm sure I was not saying pleasant things. I'm sure I was cursing, whatever have you. I don't know what I said. But I got into his face and was basically just, like, trying to get him away from my mom.

And whenever I got into his face, I think he thought I was coming in to, like, attack him. So he put up his hands to, like, defend himself, thinking I was going to swing. And when he put up his hands, thinking I was going to swing, I thought he was putting up his hands to swing. So then I put up my hands, and then we started, like, fighting. it was the only fist fight i've ever been in in my life and of course i don't know how to fight so i'm all like in my mind i look like rocky balboa but in reality i'm like

stop go away despite what it looked like stop in my brain my thought was the staircase to the basement is right there if i get him over there I can throw his ass down there and just fucking break his neck and finally be rid of this fucking problem. I hate him. I want him dead. I just have to get him to that staircase and all of this can be done. And like my only thought in my head was get him over there and end him. And thankfully, my mom and my sister intervened and they separated us, which wasn't hard because

neither one of us knew how to fight and we were both terrible at it. But that moment taught me that I probably in the right circumstance could kill somebody. And I'm a very moral person. I like to think of myself as a good person. And it was like, that haunted me that moment fucking hot. It still haunts me because it showed me that I could be pushed to the brink of like, just there's no thought. There's no like thinking ahead in that moment. It was like I had one instinct and that was kill, get rid of. And if they hadn't intervened, I mean, I don't know that I'm strong enough or could have actually thrown him down the stairs, but all I wanted for, you know, let's call it three seconds of time was to get him there and

throw him down and just see him lying there motionless and the sigh of relief I was looking forward to having. And like, it's such a scary, horrible thought to have. And I cannot believe that I had it. I've never had it since. I never had it before. But just a lifetime of buildup of him and the stress he caused, the financial stress, the mental stress, the legal troubles, everything about his existence growing up to me was a negative. All of that feeling of people like going around and that rage you felt, everything he did from the smell of his cigar body to the sound of his music to the way he dressed, I hated everything about his existence. And just in that moment, something in

me snapped and I was just done. And if I had the opportunity to kill him, I might have. And my entire life would obviously be very different because I would probably be in prison right now. And I'm pretty sure I would have not even tried to fight. I'd just been like, yeah, I did it. And, you know, I'm gone, but at least he's gone too. And I think I would have been satisfied with that in life at that point. And for us to be talking right now and trying to work things out a little bit is honestly a miracle. Because, I mean, for 33 years, I've known nothing except for contempt

for this man. And this is really personal thing to be talking about public podcast. But when you said unbridled rage, it was the first and only example that really came to mind because it's the only time in my life that I have snapped beyond any kind of thought. There was nothing. I mean, there was no rational thought it was literally just attack and it was my first thought was i'm gonna go get him away from my mom but the moment his hands went up it was just blank it was a blank slate of i see the stairs i see him whatever he hits me whatever get him there and it's such a mind fuck to think that i could have maybe i don't know if i would have you know obviously and thankfully i don't i won't know but that is all i wanted in my mind and i have never been

able to successfully rationalize in my brain what happened that day and how i felt and what i wanted brutal that's very serious very serious so you i'm 33 years you popped out the womb angry at that time i was like 17 i think i was probably 17 when that happened gotcha okay i see well that was a great story i i know this is a very jokey podcast but like this is a moment that like i probably should have talked to a therapist about at this point in life because it just it truly eats away at me it kind of sounds like it yeah it sounds like it's a serious like all for you in terms of how you view yourself well it is because we all we all rationalize our behaviors and thoughts because we have behaviors and thoughts but to have a moment where you just completely blanked and all you could think about was doing something like the the worst criminal moral thing you could possibly do

but you like it was like a lust like a blood lust for it was like i was salivating at the thought of getting to do this and it was just like it was like a different person had taken over me like a werewolf or something it was a wild experience and thought and i cannot ever forgive myself for even feeling it it's a very difficult emotional thing to uh to know that boils inside me oh i think you could eventually forgive yourself for it it's it's something that i also didn't even do anything but it feels unforgivable you can forgive yourself for a thought but that's like again like i would encourage trying to talk about that therapy but only when you're ready i should i really should yeah no i would say i think it's very

different but i feel like it's connected is since we had the baby I have struggled with him in ways that I did not expect and I have not had like the violent thoughts like that's a specific how you see that how you feel might be different from how I feel but I have struggled to feel like I'm loving the baby in some ways like you don't I didn't bond with him as much as i thought i would which people say happens but i i kind of blamed him for mandy's health problems right it was the birth was really scary for me we did an episode where i talked about that and like i resented the baby because he is what caused mandy all this like scary health stuff he almost you know caused a serious issue where he may have

died mandy might have died it took a long like in the last month or month and a half maybe it took that long and he's uh five and a half months right now for of me talking with a therapist about this and talking to mandy about this and seriously like looking at myself because it poked such a big hole in how i viewed myself yeah and i didn't understand why i felt that way and like i said this is not the same thing but i feel like this connects somehow it's i i see the connection you know how how you say how it affects how you feel about yourself like yeah it's startling i would recommend talking about it because i was very shocked when i started to really talk about it and like identify and say out loud the things what i was feeling why i was feeling that and why it was directed at the baby because for a long time i was like i just don't like babies i i can't stand

this kid why is it like why am i a bad person it's not that i don't like babies and like he and i get along really good right now and it's been a huge 180 but it came from a thing of like it was had to do with how i viewed myself because i couldn't i don't know it's complicated but i would highly recommend it i i talked to a therapist and it helped a lot actually i think well i even blamed so in a similar vein after that happened and i like couldn't believe that i reacted that way and felt that way i didn't even blame myself for that reaction i blamed him for it i was like well he did this to me he made me feel this way this is all like that's very easy to do we rationalize shit all the time our bad thoughts behavior whatever it's like oh no someone else you know whatever whatever rationalization we have to do

to make ourselves look better in our own minds we can't be at fault and you find ways to outwardly blame yeah i've had a lot of time to process this i've had half my life to process that moment well that's some serious shit there's probably still more processing to do there probably is just like i i also like i'm big big proponent of therapy um i am too you know people usually see my videos and they're they're like oh the funny haha rage moments but then i talk about like i'll talk about like no i don't like playing rage games because i don't like being angry and it's not just like i don't like being angry i don't like tapping into that side of myself or even feeding that side of myself because the last time that i got really angry on a video was during unisonis when i punched a hole in the

wall i remember that video and yeah we edited it around it and we edited it in a way that was like oh ha ha funny funny that moment was not funny in real life when we were filming like ethan was about ready to leave because he was like oh there's no fucking way uh like it was just like oh i don't know what's what the fuck is happening it's like i don't know why i was so angry because it was like right before we were doing the bike ride totally fine something in the bike ride about what ethan was doing was just annoying me but he's annoyed me before and that's totally fine but something about like my anger that i like usually like to keep under wraps just got tripped there it had something to do with if i like talked to a therapist about it was like to do with like my insecurities about athleticism that tie into like how I was in high school and

like how I was looked down upon for a certain athletic events. And it tied into like my lack, my inability to perform at the level that I expect lots of different things that ties into, but it could easily just be blamed. Like, oh, I snapped at that moment. It was like, sometimes if you look at it in like reality, like that moment for me was not really something that should have led to that much anger. And yet it did. And there was evidence like, man, I should look into this. But that's why I don't like to go into those places in the first place, which is also fine. You don't need to dig up everything you're past.

There's something about like actors, like a lot of acting classes will teach you like you gotta tap into your most painful things i'm like that's horribly damaging and also incredibly disrespectful to your own past and the experiences that you had if you choose to use it that's fine but just like if you if you abuse it in ways to exploit emotions for acting purposes i don't know if that's the best way to go about it but yeah no rage is like real and and i think everyone experiences it at some time or another and it's like yeah we we as humans are just capable of incredible moments of outrage and and just rage because rage is an emotion but i also talked to a therapist recently about the fact that you can't purely deny your rage because the rage is also much like sadness a useful emotion when it's

justified being angry about something it is exploited in today's age in terms of media and everything like that but anger is a real emotion and cannot be fully expunged which is something that i tried to do for a very long time which led to even bigger outbursts at random moments but it's it's a fascinating balance which is why i like talking about it i'm glad you guys are sharing um yeah i want to differentiate before i forget so when we play games like uno like barbara is famous for me right the barbara rage or whatever but that is so different when i get mad at a video game it's like you get mad i think sometimes mark when you play rage games where you actually feel like ragey like i get mad with playing uno barb or whatever like when shit like that happens it's

like i know that i'm making content rage where it's like i know going in that shit like that could happen and i wouldn't say i fake it but i definitely like you know i play up the rage and i lean into it it's like oh god because you feel frustrated right whenever something you get screwed over in a card game or something it's like that sigh but i like lean into that sigh for like making content and stuff like that. I've only actually gotten super angry making content. Like I think once I was recording G mob with people and we recorded for like an hour and a half. And I just, the way it went down, I was actually angry. And the moment it ended, I deleted all the context. I was just so angry.

That's happened one time where I've actually gotten mad making content. The other rage is like a different, I don't know how to qualify it or quantify it. It's a different thing that I tap into for that. It's a real feeling, but it's slightly exaggerated and played up. And it's like, I'm frustrated. So I'm just gonna scream, Barbara, like, you know, stuff like that.

But the rage that I felt that one day with my brother was very different. And I know that that's in me to get there because I've gotten there now at least one time, but I've only ever actually gotten like to the point of being super mad, like actually angry maybe twice in the last 10 years where it's like, I've had a moment where it's like, I'm actually pissed. Like I'll get angry. I'll get frustrated or whatever, but it takes a lot. I've got a pretty high tolerance, but whenever I get to a certain point and like something actually like snaps me to where it's like i want to punch a hole in the wall or throw a chair to

something like that it is super rare like after that moment i can think of actually one moment since i was 17 where i got that angry and then i didn't really do anything about it i just went off and huffed and calmed myself down but i felt that not the same degree of rage but just i i got there i got to the point of like i'm so angry right now i can't even have a conversation i need to go be on my own for a few minutes just to process and i'll talk after mad that's happened like once so i don't get there very easily very often it takes a lot but whenever i do get there and after my brother it's like seeing how scary i can be or at least how i can feel it's like i try everything in my power to never let myself

get there so it's like if there everything in my power to never let myself get there so it's like if there's a problem I don't sit on it you know we'll talk it through we'll work it out if I'm mad at one of you two or you know if I'm Molly and I are disagreeing about something it's like we can have a few minutes to cool down but then we're going to work it out we're not going to go to bed mad this is not going to boil over and become some big thing because with my brother it was a lifetime of build-up that all came out in one moment and it's like I can't ever let things get there again because that buildup whenever it finally released It was just like seeing someone else take over your body in mind and just not I wasn't even trapped in the corner

It was like just after it happened. It was like I Couldn't believe I was standing there like with my arms up in the air looking like an asshole who doesn't know how to fight But also just the thought process. I don't't know very different it's very different than like gamer rage for me it's a completely different ends of the spectrum on how i feel about things i don't get that kind of mad whenever i make content of any kind fair enough all right that's the end of round one congratulations guys you did great uh i assigned many points to that um bob got the bonus point uh wade you got a certain number of points but i won't tell you what it is just because i'm gonna keep it secret uh but hey fair fair great job that round all right bob all right who's ready for round two

yeah i don't know man i don't have a round two but two, but yeah, let's do it. Let's do it! I want to hear more rage. I don't have a really serious story like, Wade, is that okay? Oh, it doesn't have to be. God, you don't have to bring down the mood like Wade did. Come on, give me some content rage.

No, no. I'm like rocking in my chair over here like, why did I do this? Sorry, Wade, it's Bob's turn to talk yes mr markiplier of course mr markiplier yes sir mr markiplier yes yeah yeah um uh oh uh title what's the title yeah who's got an idea titles all right uh i uh i think i have a title you could do your title first if you want this time wait i'll give you a minute to think oh of course yeah i have a if you if you need time to think get out of my house okay i thought of a moment i titled it okay improv but it's a real

story all right i uh mine my title is i i i i will fucking throw you against the wall. Don't threaten me with a good time. That's pretty good. Get out of my house. I will throw you against a wall. These are pretty good. Wade, can you say yours with more passion? Get out of my house.

I pick Bob's. Wow. I just want to do it like throwing against the wall the bait and switch yeah well uh i i gotta say the title i knew it was coming but i indulged anyway the title might be the best part of mine but this is one that gets me i i am a pretty tech savvy person when this job that we do there's a lot of tech bullshit that happens windows updates and it ruins all your sound settings and all this sort of stuff and i get frustrated with that but like like a reasonable amount and i'm pretty good at fixing things i'm usually able to get to a solution something that gets me and this is like a very

boomer take but something that gets me is i love smartphones i love where phones are today they are fantastic it's cool that you have the entire internet just available in your pocket. The way it works is awesome. I love it. And I don't really struggle with how they function. I'm comfortable navigating smartphones, using apps, whatever. I'm not that old. But a core thing about a cell phone for me is it fucking needs to be a phone when I fucking

need a phone when i fucking need a phone the whole thing about the cell phone is you don't have to go find a payphone you have a cell phone and in the world we live in today there aren't payphones because everyone has a cell phone like if you're in any sort of populated area there used to be payphones on the corners or in front of you know gas stations or whatever totally common thing go put a quarter in make a phone call whatever if today's world if your cell phone doesn't work you're fucked you mean hopefully you could just ask a stranger to borrow a phone or whatever i don't want to do that but my phone does all kinds of mystical shit my phone has an ai also i got the got the case, by the way, Mark.

Oh, you did? We talked about this in a previous episode. Oh, you like it? I do. It's actually, it checks a lot of boxes. It's not like perfection, but it's pretty close. But that's another thing. But anyway, my phone does all kinds of crazy shit.

It has AI in it. It can do all kinds of nonsense. But sometimes it's not a phone and it makes me so mad there have been a couple instances in my life where and they were the they were in the past when smartphones were a little less good a little less modern but still basically wonders of technology right basically a magical access point to the internet that lives in my pocket and i can do anything i want but i was like i my car broke down and i was like oh i don't there's not an app or whatever i need to call a tow company i need to call someone to come help me my car's broken down i don't have a spare

uh fucking i just need to make a phone call and i happen to be in a place where like the coverage was bad when i was like between cell towers so i couldn't use my phone to make a phone call and it turned into this thing where i was like well maybe if i just walk up the road a little bit i'll like i'll get better cell service didn't man i was like well maybe i'll i'll just dip into like a gas station or somewhere and like borrow their phone or whatever it was all like private businesses right it was like lawyers offices and places where you're not you're not really like you don't have a reason to go in there and so most of them were like locked doors not really storefronts where you're invited in as a random person i had to walk for a mile and a half to

find a place where i could borrow a phone to make a phone call and like it's it's unreasonable because technology doesn't always work and it's not perfect. But the amount of actual rage I felt at my phone, and this has happened a couple subsequent times as well, I have almost thrown my phone away. Like, just like a movie character just been like, and thrown my phone just into the street or fucking wherever. One time I did throw my phone i spiked it it had a really nice case on it uh and uh the case actually was just testing military grade drop protection uh and it had a pretty good bevel protection it was fine the phone was fine i didn't break the phone but i made a dent in the hardwood floor which a little embarrassing oops but like that

that specific thing where it's like you could do all this magical shit but you're not a phone when i need you and in the one emergency i have every three years where i just need to make a phone call that does get to me and i i have thrown my phone i didn't throw it against the wall like the title implies but i spiked it like a football on the floor you did say i will throw you against the wall so yeah no it's it's a threat i've i'm like white knuckle gripping it like i will fucking throw you into the abyss so yeah i mean not like the craziest rage but one of those times led to me standing next to my broken down piece of shit car just screaming in a public place just like ah fuck god like that psychopath

on the side of the road it's just like yelling at his car because i i was like late for work or something right it's a thing where it's like oh i'm gonna get a write-up for this i might get fired if this hat is you remember my volkswagen mark it broke down all the time that thing was a piece of garbage today's episode is sponsored but uh anyway i don't know that feels hollow after such a serious discussion no no that's fine this is all about a random instances of unbridled rage i think they're real things happen to me too guys i have hardships it's not all smartphones and and uh and uh others you know it's, it's real rage.

Man, I was trying to pull up something because I was so curious if it's still there. It's something where I was so unbelievably angry, but it was at YouTube or specifically YouTube customer support way back in the day when my original channel was demonetized and so this was um it's a it's a phrase that i will remember for a very very long time because it sticks in my mind and i've actually heard this phrase before when i get angry because i'm trying to get help with something uh and it doesn't happen when i'm speaking to them about like okay why is it banned and they were like we can't tell you i'm like why can't you tell me why it's banned and it's like because it's banned and there's no point in it and i'm like well then how am i supposed to be better in the future and they were acting like oh why would you be here in the

future you've been banned and i'm like but i can what what is this like after a while of back and forth and i was getting angry and there's an email chain i remember hearing or seeing the words this conversation is no longer productive and i was trying to search in my email for this one but it doesn't seem like it exists anymore but no phrase has ever gotten me so angry so quickly than being told this conversation is no longer productive and i go bitch this conversation was never productive you didn't do anything you didn't tell me anything you didn't give me anything you have only left me darker in deeper darkness than where i was before you think i wasted your time like what do you mean your customer server you're supposed to help like being told to calm down yeah exactly i didn't even yell

at them i was not cursing i was trying to find information of like well this is only um a cool thing that I could do and maybe my future I don't know and I I still to this day I talk about that like god I want to know who the fuck that was because like just where I am now and I'm like if if just if if that is all it takes to stop someone from making something and i'm here at this point it's like ah and we talk about that wait a lot we're like as soon as it has entered the chat room and you know the funniest thing it was her the whole time the funniest thing is i can log into my old markiplier youtube channel monetization's back because that whole system changed so i could i could go back to that channel if i really long live the channel the channel's back

get the same haircut i should make the same haircut and relaunch the channel god at least for april fools you gotta make a video where you look like old mark and you like long live the channel monetization's's back. Oh, wow. I should. Oh, the dream, you know? Dude, that would be so good. You could use AI to DH yourself and it'll be perfect. You're right.

You're right. You're right. You don't have to do the talking. There's Mark voice you can use. Yeah, old Mark voice even. I think one time I did like streamed on my old channel channel just randomly one time just for fun. And people were so confused. You should make weird knockoff Markiplier content on that so everyone is like,

Wait, is this like an AI Mark channel? What the fuck is happening? Intentionally make yourself look like... Wow. Oh, dude. There's so many of us.'m jealous i wish i had a mark you got so much free time you should put your you should really put your mind to that i bet you could i bet you could actually make something if you focused you're right you're

the movie on a shelf you need to make old 2014 mark that was even 20 that was like 2012 2013 yes 2012 that was the first year. Yeah, okay. Yep, that was back in the good old days. Back when YouTube had your own thing that looked like a channel, not this silly one-page crap. You remember when you could customize your borders? That was great. Dude, sometimes I use like the Wayback Machine or whatever it's called, and I go back and I look at like just the way YouTube looked in different years it's like i never in my brain remember it looking like this like some of the

different versions oh well it doesn't exist to me and yet there it is ah the good old days well i had a story too what was your title i don't even remember now anyway that's the end around get out of my ah right uh get out of my round all right what's up what's up what's up wade what's up wade all right it's not even it's not it's not nearly as good as the first story that's the that's the one that truly sticks out in my mind but i guess i have some pet peeves that i don't really consider or think about but like in hindsight i do and one of them is just like mutual respect. When I go to like a friend's house, I'm very respectful. Like as a kid, even I was like, okay, this is my friend's parents' house. I want like them to like me.

I don't want to like be a douche. So if I make a mess, I'm going to clean it up. If I, you know, I'm going to be respectful of their rules, whatever they say goes, yada, yada, yada. And in my brain, it's like, it wasn't even a conscious thought, but it was just like, well, of course they'll be the same way in my house, right? Like if I'm respectful of their house, they'll be respectful of mine, like whatever. And I remember one of my friends came over, a friend that I was over at their house all the time.

And I don't even remember what they did at this point. I can't remember what they did, but they did something that was like either disrespectful to me or my mom's house or whatever it was. And I was like, I confronted them about, I was like, that's rude. What are you, what the fuck are you doing? And they were like, they like brushed it off or something and the moment they did that like the disrespect i felt like i don't it again that that moment where it's like bitch what excuse me you you think you're better than me your response was something other than i'm sorry i won't do it again

what did you say because in my brain you said i'm sorry that won't happen again dude whatever you know my bad uh but that's not the words that came out of your mouth you want to try again and we almost got to the point of blows we didn't like i said i didn't i was not really that confident you fight a lot this is another instance that what is this this is a new side we never came to blows but we did get up on each other's faces and i will you know i was taller than him So it was more of a You want to get in my face please do I will use you like a fucking

Step ladder and splay your entrails across The fucking driveway if you ever disrespect Me again you know that's why my brain works and I'm angry Um Yeah no okay Ultimately we got each other's faces and it like It looked like we might fight And another of my friends intervened was like dudes just chill and i was like no i'm not chilling that is just

fucking disrespectful get out of my fucking house and i remember he like looked at me like for real and like i was not playing around and he left we eventually like after i don't know how long it was let's call it a week or two like talked talked it through, whatever, worked it out, explained our sides of things. And we were friends and we were cool. But like, that was a big moment in our relationship that it was like, we'd been friends for years. And for like that to have happened blew my mind. Cause it was like, I have always been so respectful over like your place. What in the fuckity fuck shit are you doing? And I don't know. I didn't want to forgive him at that moment at all. I was like, I never want to speak again and i don't even remember what he did it probably wasn't that big of a deal but just being disrespectful was a pet peeve i didn't even know i had until like someone wasn't

and it was like i didn't even want to talk to that person because it felt like such a betrayal of our friendship for some reason if you think about it that's probably the same reason you were mad at your brother it's a disrespect dude if this was a therapist office man this would be a 16 hour session to go through the issues i had growing up with some family members it was uh i had a good childhood but i also had some aspects of it that were oh god i have to give every penny i've ever made. Can I pose a question? I'm just curious. Sure. Have you guys had like fist fights?

I know, I don't think any of us has really been in a fight and didn't, we weren't like big fighters. Have that, has that been a thing that's been around you? Like growing up, did you see fights a lot? Do you have certain friends who would just fight each other frequently? Cause I, I've only ever seen one fist fight in person in front of me and that was the most surrealistic shit i've ever seen in my life i i hmm i've i don't want to get too in depth you can go no no go i'll tell mine last yeah well i'm sort of just gauging

like how do you how do you how does that affect you does that freak you out is it normal like where does that fall because it seems insane to me i've seen things because i had drugs and alcohol in my family and when people are not themselves they do things that are very regrettable so i've seen some shit throughout my life but as far as like just two sober people fighting it out my brother and i the one time that i talked about a little bit ago, and then like my other siblings have kind of fought a bit, but they were either intoxicated or on something else when those kinds of things have happened. So I've seen that kind of thing in those instances. I had a weird one. There was one weird moment when I was in college. I can't remember if this was at Miami University or down at UC, but I was walking on a sidewalk

and I don't remember if I was looking at my phone or what I was doing, but I was just walking on a sidewalk toward class and this guy was walking on the sidewalk toward me So I kind of scooted over to the right to make room for him to pass me and he just Beelined at me and bumped into me like ran into me and jammed his shoulder into my like my chest elbow or uh shoulder region And I turned around and looked at him and the dude like got up in my face Like he wanted me to fight him and I was just like what the fuck and then like we stared at each other for a minute not really knowing what the hell was gonna come next I think he

wanted to fight like I think he was I don't know what he was doing then he turned around and left and I just kept going about my way but like that's the closest to like some weird kind of fight situation I've ever been in was this dude just like moved out of the way to some weird kind of fight situation I've ever been in, was this dude just like,

moved out of the way, walking down, and this guy, Beelines, just rammed his shoulder right into this region of me, and then I turned to look at him, and he just like, he's like, what? What are you going to do about it? That was like, I don't know what to do about it. What the fuck do I do in this instance?

That was really weird behavior my guy i'm unclear what comes next and in sports i played a basketball game where this guy and i were having a very physical match the entire game i played center so it's like very physical down in the paint and this dude i were like bumping elbows kind of like fighting for position the entire game and something happened where this dude got pissed and it looked like we were going to come to blows and he goes to like what i think is to punch me and he stops and pokes me in the eye and i also was left completely fucking confused because what is the response back if i punch him i'm overreacting if i poke him i think we're flirting so i don't know what the hell to do. So I did nothing in that instance either. But this dude I thought was going to punch me and he stopped and just like right in my eye just poked me.

And it was like, that's really weird. Ow. But also, what the fuck do I do to you in response? Because I'm pissed. But I don't know what the response is to that. Nipple. Nipple tweak is the response to that. I think.

Yeah. So I had two weird instances personally where that kind of i mean i saw shit with other people but two instances in my own life where it was like do i elbow you back do i punch you do i poke you do i ball knee you do i cry what do i do like i don't know so yeah that's i hope that answered your question i don't remember what it was but that's where we are oh that's fascinating that reminds me of the time that we were at whatever it's like some pax party and it was like this pizza place wait i think you were there uh oh i was there that was in seattle that was pax west yeah and then the the waiter there like i went to get the waiter's attention because one of our friends was not having a good time and wanted to get out i'm like hey you know you got a bag or something they're probably gonna puke and they're like you need to get them out of here and i'm like yeah i know

that's why i'm yeah that's why i'm here and then he's like well what are you doing about it eating your pizza and i'm like you you sell this pizza but i was pissed at the time like in my head i'm like you gave me the pizza why are you mad at me but i was just like livid in my head so i just dropped the pizza on the floor and that was like all right you're out of here and as soon as his hand grabbed my shirt i was ready to kill that man like it's it's a strange thing not quite to your level wade but it was like oh i know exactly what's happening now. We're about to fight. And it was like all of you around just like suddenly six hands on this guy.

I think I've told this story before. That was such a horrible situation all around. And I remember that dude being a total douche about it. You were just like, I need help. And he was like, yeah, what are you going to do to help? And it's like, I don't know because I need help. I don't know why he was confrontational he was such a very very confusing the whole thing because like we if you have a third party he

watched it and didn't know you yeah they would be like oh what did that guy say what did that half korean looking guy say to the waiter to piss him off but why we knew what the exchange was and it was like what an inappropriate response from the waiter like what him off but i we knew what the exchange was and it was like what an inappropriate response from the waiter like what the fuck is happening here my friend's sick and needs help yeah well fucking get out of my restaurant you piece of shit yeah well help them then and i'm like i want to help me help you help that was so weird like no help you help me help them no yeah yeah anyway i'd forgotten about that entire event until you just brought it up and that that was so

that whole situation was so bizarre watching adult men fight in any context is pretty weird to me but out if it's not like an organized fight where it's like you know a competition of mma or boxing or something it's super fucking weird that happened one. I was in a situation where I was hanging out with a guy that I kind of knew and then some of his friends that I really didn't know. And we were just at a bar having some drinks. Everyone was not super trashed, and we headed home. And they just started throwing punches at each other. And it was just four of us, right?

So two of them are fighting other guys there, and they're fighting in front of me and I'm like, I feel like I should be stopping this, but I don't know these guys. Like if I jump into this, they're just gonna, it's weird. It's fucking surreal. Any adult who feels like fighting is a natural response has either been through some serious shit or I don't know, needs to work on themselves because that's just wild. I went to a bar with some friends.

Well, I knew a couple of the people, again, same situation. I knew a couple of the people and we went to a bar and they were like oh i've got some friends from college that are going to come with us like okay cool whatever and we were hanging out chatting and we go back to someone's place afterward we're all just going to crash at their like apartment or whatever it is and um one of the guys was really drunk and really hungry when he got back so he grabbed like a pizza box he went and laid on the couch and started eating pizza and he just fucking passed out on this couch like the pizza box on his chest and one of the other dudes that was there i don't know what compels some guys to be like this but he was like huh look at this guy passed out with a pizza box on his chest and he walked up and just fucking

drilled him in the nuts just punched him in the balls sure and the dude heals like this you know pizza folds up falls on the floor dude falls on the floor afterward and the guy just laughs and like goes back to his room and the other dude's just like writhing on the floor in pain and that was the exchange and it's like some things don't connect with me like there was no part of that exchange that seemed necessary funny good it was all just like i don't know either of these people so again what do i do do i help like how do i help him he got punched in the balls i know what that's like there's nothing i can do i think you gotta go hold his nuts for him so that they don't hurt so much the thoughts in your head are like do i get him an ice pack do i go punch the guy who punched him

that'd be stupid do i sit here and stare stupidly and do nothing because that's what i'm doing guess i'm gonna keep doing that one hey your friends are weird yeah they're just like that all right time to sleep hope i don't get punched in the nuts for sleeping here and that was my thought process as i drifted off was hope i don't get punched in the nuts for falling asleep. Well, that's what you get for falling asleep. Yeah, that's your fault. I guess so, even though that was the pre-arrangement. Why would you think

it was okay to sleep there like that? Fool. The predetermined arrangement was, hey, you guys want to come crash back here afterward? Yeah, that sounds great. Alright. Well, we've been pretty angry this episode. I feel like the rage has consumed us but i feel like we've let it out yeah i feel like we unleashed some things i feel like shit

thank you for sharing guys and thank you everybody out there for listening remember if you've been angry it doesn't make you a bad person wait i'm back if you've been angry it doesn't automatically make you a bad person okay um i think what you're trying to say a bad person no look no abandon that part mark okay anger anger is a natural emotion feeling anger is a natural response to different things that might happen to you and around you. It's okay to feel angry. It does not mean anything about who you are as a person or your morals. But you might be a bad person, is Mark's point.

Yeah, it could be. I'm not excluding you. You might be like just the worst. I think if you give in to that feeling and do things you'll regret, that might make you a bad person. That one, yeah. That stuff. So I was almost a bad person, but thankfully I was stopped.

I think what Mark is trying to say is that the episode is coming to a close. Yes! And I'm going to pick the winner. Great. Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do. Wow, how's your desk calculator working?

Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do. What are you actually looking at? Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do. You're clearly... Oh, hang on! Did I win? Man, I was calculating the points. Huh?

Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Skies are blue. All right.

With 13 points, Bob, you came in second place all right wait a minute wade had 16 whopping points 16 with all of his accessory stories his inserts in between conversations he didn't win a single bonus point for the titles, but he came in and he dominated this game. Oh, I didn't realize it was a volume thing. I could have definitely talked more. Oh, he did not only just talk more, he had more heartfelt, rage-fueled stories, and he had the advantage that every time I hear him speak,

I get angry, which coincides with the theme. Congratulations, Wade. I didn't feel good about winning, and now I somehow feel worse about winning. So thank you. I didn't even tell the story about how rage-filled I was on tour. I almost killed you in your bunk, Mark. What about that?

How many points is that worth? Oh, uh, wait a minute. I'm just saying, don't sleep in the same house as me, and it'll be fine. Here's the photo evidence of me with the garrote wire. Oh, interesting. That's pretty ragey, right? Yeah.

But anyway, Wade, would you like to give your winner's speech? Well, maybe it should be loser's speech first. I'll loser's speech second. Wade, go first. What? Wade, you're a victor. you're victorious i don't feel like a victor this was a good topic this is a really good topic but it also makes you confront parts about yourself you don't necessarily like and stuff you like to try to forget about but i guess

it's good not to you need to remember and try to be better so i don't know i try to approach things in a healthier way that that moment helped me realize I needed to, which is why I've changed how I address people whenever we're not getting along. But, no, I thought it was a really good topic, and I think a lot of people could probably relate to having those kinds of feelings and interactions and whatnot. Maybe not as severe as the one I went through, but

that kind of shit happens. So, if you go through it, yeah, talk to a therapist. Try to redefine life. Find new ways of confronting issues to maybe help contain that feeling or keep it from happening to a therapist try to redefine life find new ways of confronting issues to maybe help contain that feeling or keep it from happening to begin with so thanks for hosting and um i hope you all still like me after finding out i'm a terrible person well there's some things to unpack in that last sentence uh bob your turn for losers beach oh well i feel like i've given a lot

of these in recent memory but uh i'll try i'll try and make this one unique uh no let's i will say i um i have a i struggle with processing emotions my instinctive response is to try and repress them and push them down and not experience them and that worked for quite a while but that is not really i'm learning that's not really, I'm learning, that's not really a healthy way to deal with it. And with anger in particular, experiencing anger doesn't make you a bad person. Feeling and thinking things towards other people

or about other people is not something that makes you a bad person. The thing you control is what you choose to do, how you choose to act. You can think all kinds of stuff in anger and rage because that can kind of blindside you and come out of nowhere but you control how you act and if you can maintain control of your you know actions and decisions outwardly that is what defines you know who you are and whether or not you're indulging those bad thoughts that you have

so i that's a big thing i've learned because i am in the same boat as Wade. I have felt very negatively about myself when dealing with and learning how to deal with anger and other emotions. And it's tough, but you can figure it out. You can learn how to feel good about yourself, no matter how you might feel in any given moment. So I would encourage people to talk about it with anyone who would talk to you, who will listen, therapist, whomever. I've talked to many people, and many people have helped me in different ways. So even though I'm a loser and that hurts, I don't have a second part. I'm a loser and that hurts. That's it.

There's no redemption. I'm just a loser. I feel much better about winning now hearing that. Thank you. Okay, well, that was a little depressing. But all of this has been a little depressing. Hey, it's a loser speech! What do you want? What do you want from me? You said at the beginning

that you could have it with grace, but alright. No, I said I would make it unique. I didn't say it with grace. Right, right, right. I thought I heard grace, but I must be wrong. I'm sorry. But thank you, everybody for listening. The morals as we have laid out, are as thus. You might be a bad person.

It was better morals. We don't know. We don't know. We don't know. That's it. That's the moral of the story. You might be a bad person. Thanks for watching.

You should look into that. You should check on that. You're the only one who can know that, so figure that out. So thank you so much all for your beautiful faces, and take care of yourselves, and check out this podcast. More! Or we'll be mad at you. You just learned how violently angry we can be.

Don't piss us off by not listening and following this podcast. That's the moral of the story. Podcast out. Good one it is. Oh, I jumped all over you. Will, cut me out. Oh, no. Mark's getting

enraged. Podcast out!