Distractible - The Bait Debate

Episode Date: October 10, 2022

Today the guys troll specific media fandoms by giving them hot take bait. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Good evening, gentle listener, and welcome to Distractible, a Wood Elf production. This week, Mark stirs the pot and dons the crown of the Troll King and puts a target on all of the gents worldwide. Bob dunks on Snape and throws shade at Mickey's Palace and then Robot Chicken. Wade absolutely rampages about the existence of Prince Charming, shipping angels, and hits K-pop and SCP. Yes, it's time for The Bait Debate.

Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show. Hello and welcome to Distractible, the only podcast you could ever hope to listen to in this moment of your life. And then when the episode is over, it will leave an emptiness inside of your soul that you can only fill with sadness. Unquestionably. Yay. Unquestionably yay unquestionably yes absolutely yay my name is markiplier also known as mark i am your host for this evening morning or afternoon or if you're playing this in the middle of your sleep that is an odd choice

but we do not judge here i'm joined by bob nightmares nightmares nightmares just in case you're sleeping that's for you sleepers pay attention and ed wade uh boobs uh sexy nightmares hot nightmares to help them be less terrible okay uh-huh this is gonna be a weird night's sleep for you uh sleep listeners sweet dreams uh if you're sleep listening uh wake up before you forget this and write it down that you were so that we can not believe you and no one will ever believe you. This episode never existed. We are your dream weavers.

And if you're listening to this, you need to wake up from your coma. This is a message. You need to wake up. You have to wake up. Elizabeth needs you. Who finds their family member in a coma and be like, you know what? I know what will help them and they put on the distractible podcast it was our first episode hair like i'm in a coma teratoma teratomas i'm awake teratacoma i'm in a coma in tacoma teratacoma

teratacoma we should make a podcast called dream weavers where we specifically are episodes designed for people sleeping and or in a coma. That is actually a fun one. I do enjoy that. And ours is as crazy as that could be. Speaking of dream, no, not Dreamweavers. There was a better thing. Teratoma hair.

How's that better? No, it is better because it relates more. Okay. How wonderful is that? That hair might save your life. Wait, what? Not me yeah i know right yeah i was gonna say you get free hair constantly but oh god well i'm sure hair from other parts of your body would work and you got plenty of that i'm saved it doesn't even have to be your body have you guys heard of a sl sloth? Heard of the animal sloth? Yeah, I've heard of it.

I'm familiar, yeah. Did you know that in their hair is millions of different microorganisms? No, but that doesn't sound like a thing I want to know about. Yeah. Oh, you do. Sounds concerning. Okay. Oh, you do.

And in these microorganisms living in the cracks, they were investigated by biologists for the first time, and they discovered species of algae and fungi which have not been found anywhere else in the world. That's really weird. That's good and or bad and or neutral. Oh, it's good. How is that possible? Are you saying they evolved or something and developed in that sloth alone and that's all they know? Yes, exactly, yes. How long do sloths live? Well, it's like the human gut biome. You know, it's tailored specifically to humans.

It existed and evolved alongside humans. And in sloth hair, they've finally been able, with advancements in technology, been able to study these microorganisms and found microorganisms that could possibly be used for treatments for malaria, Chagas disease, and even breast cancer. Okay, that's pretty wonderful. I'll get on board with that. Sloths have been holding out. They have been.

Sloths are over here grubbing all their weird little algae and fungi, and they're holding on to the secrets. They've been trying to share it with us. They just move real slow. One sloth is somewhere in the middle of South Georgia. Just like, I'll get to D.C. someday. It's like, you know, the story about the snail. You get to live forever, but there's somewhere in the world there's a snail chasing you.

There's also a sloth trying to get to you to save your life. Like, then they're both racing to get to you. It gets there first how slow would they be because even if they got to you could just step away at that point right yeah you'd think that's just the imminent threat it's just living with the thought of a sword hanging over your head and an unwavering knowledge that if you stop moving for just one second too long, the snail will find you. Or anyway, we'll close the last couple centimeters. That would make sleep a little terrifying. Exactly.

Well, you think it's on the other side of the world, and so you rest easy for a few nights. But then after a few months, you start to think, maybe it got there. Maybe it managed to crawl onto a plane to get closer to me. God, the snail built a snail boat and sailed across the ocean to get to me. Exactly. That's the snail built a snail boat and sailed across the ocean to get to me. Exactly. That's the terror of the snail. Wouldn't you say he snailed across the ocean to get to you if he built a snail boat?

I think I did, but I think I stutter, stutter, stutterated. Sure. Sure. Rather than intentionulating it. I like the idea that as you're being cursed,

the witch or whoever is like, saying the spell and is like, and it happens. You're like, and then the snail appears in front of you and then a guy on a scooter just comes along it's like and you just like and you're like ah sick well i guess he's not moving i guess he's not chasing me anymore no no it's unkillable that's part of the curse oh okay it's an invincible sale. Okay, fine. And anyway, so sloth fur could contain cures to diseases we don't even understand.

That is pretty wonderful, actually. That's pretty sweet. That's pretty wonderful. Wait till they get the chipmunk fur. Yeah, how many animals do we need to shave now to finish this research? Where are we going to get all this fur? That lady down the street's black cat's fur. Yeah, the truth of health in the world is to make everything bold.

So honestly, you were on to something. Join me. And for that, I'll give Wade one point. Oh, point well learned. But I'll also give Bob one point for having hair that might contain microorganisms that are useful. Ooh. He's got face hair he doesn't have that could contain microorganisms. I got stubble.

He's got stubble. It's because it's not as manly looking and cool. I got a full graying jungle over here, graying from the healthy bacteria that live in it. Gross. Well, I'm glad you guys are already animalistic and at each other's throats because that is going to be the theme of today.

Okay. Great. I love it. Yes yes welcome to the great bait debate so how this is going to work you guys have been on the internet for a very long time correct over a year we've been working on it for 10 years on it since longer than that you are both correct on that uh how you guys have seen a lot of things on the internet right oh yeah we have yeah we have quick name the worst thing you've seen on the internet there's a tiktok account that's a guy

coming out of a door going oh what a wonderful day to come outside and then it's usually followed by someone getting horrifically injured. I hate it. It's always awful, but I always have to watch. I saw some videos of like horses and animals, like shoes being changed when they have like foot injuries. And that was pretty awful to watch. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

Well, we're not talking about that either, but we are trying to stir up the cauldron of hate that is the internet. On the internet, there are many people that troll. The person who makes that TikTok account is actually probably an example who makes videos for the explicit example of getting a rise out of people or catching people off guard with a thing to get a reaction or get their attention. It's kind of the embodiment of any attention is good attention. And today, we together are going to collectively stokes the flames of our own fandoms and fandoms across the

world because apparently our opinions suck and everything we believe in is terrible and wrong so why not dive deep into that pool the cesspool of nothingness that we apparently have stirred over and over again with our horrible restaurant and game opinions and we're just gonna go ahead and straight up attack people okay all right i've it. I have no concerns about this. Let's go. What concerns could you possibly have? So there's going to be some basic rules here.

There are many fandoms across the internet. I have a list of some of them. I know there's going to be someone mad that I don't have their fandom to roast. I want it to be mine. Why didn't you uncloneose us people are never mad when we do videos that leave something out that they like yeah i know right imagine but it's not just a straight up roast right because that's not elegant that's not the whole crux of it really when it comes down to the bait debate is to say something that you know will cause a fight but is

specific to that fandom so you have to have knowledge of that fandom to be able to get a rise out of them correct okay everyone understanding this so when i when i give you what what i'm just wait just remember that he doesn't know things about stuff listen man i already get enough hate as it is now i'm asking for it this is terrible you can voluntarily abstain from a selection but only one of you can okay because the other will then be given an opportunity and they could make a very weak bait and it doesn't even have to be good and they'll get a point automatically okay if you want a point in that round you have to say something but you can volunteer to say nothing okay okay so it'll go down the list and there might be something that you know you don't know try to like give a bait and uh we will alternate turns so first up i'm

gonna flip uh i don't have a coin anyone got coin you can google coin flip and it will be right you're right or ask jeeves or bing wait no i'm going to use my ai that i have here and i'm going to ask it to come up with a picture of a coin and whether it's heads or tails what if it's perfectly sideways american quarter is what i've got a picture of a bush on it i don't know but i'm putting in an american quarter and i'm seeing what it's going to do and it's a head it's hands great what does that mean oh what does that mean oh man that solves everything. I'm glad that we did this.

Well, go ahead. All right, someone call one. It's flipping. It's flipping in the air. It is like two halves of a coin, but it's more heads than it is tails. I'll show you the picture. I'll show you the picture just so you know.

It's definitely, you'll see. It's definitely more heads. It is, it is. You'll see. see it's definitely more heads it is it is you'll see i don't know what this coin flip is even for so i don't know if i've won or lost as to who goes first oh good me so yeah it's mostly heads all right fair wait where did you say did you text it the dm and discord oh i see i see i see yeah okay so you're gonna what give us a prompt and i gotta say something that's yeah you have to say basically you're trying to get into an argument or get that fan base specifically to be mad at you in a way that

isn't a generic insult to anybody else right sure yeah all right sure we're gonna start this off with something that you both know probably and that you both understand at least to some extent to make it fair wade you are going first excellent the fandom you're trying to get a rise out of is harry potter okay yeah easy enough uh magic isn't real and being obsessed with it and this little world of wizards and whatnot that get to summon their little spells and have their little relationship and save the world it's all fake and you know what the person that wrote it pretty terrible too so if you like it you're also terrible i'm gonna rate that as a weak one i'm gonna give that like a like it could be a lot better because

it wasn't very narrow and very focused that that would probably make the fandom go like okay you're weird that's what i would say if i was a harry potter fan i am the harry potter fan and i'm like yeah whatever all right bob you got a better one. Snape was lying. That was all an imaginary sequence of events he created to rationalize his unbelievable betrayal. He never loved Lily. He was just trying to get Harry onto their side. He was trying to change his mind, weaken his resolve so that he could betray his friends the way that Severus Snape betrayed everyone in his life except for the bad guys who he was cool with I want to rebut you want to rebut yeah I don't I don't know I'll leave it we got to agree what is a rebut what is

this he wants a rebut now that I've started what you go I want I want another chance at a day I think if we were to do another one, it would be another round. Yeah, we could go again. That exchange, I Bob soundly won. I could see people just... The teeth of whoever is still a Harry Potter fan in this day and age. Okay, I got one. I got one here.

Okay, all right. Dumbledore was a terrible father figure, and I'm glad he died. And I wish he had died sooner in the book series so harry could have grown a pair before six books in that's pretty good i mean maybe about the being a terrible father figure is okay because i don't think it was great but yeah i think that's pretty good that's much improved thank you thank you the characters in the Harry Potter universe that are meant to be demonstrating elements of magic

that are hard to comprehend. Professor Trelawney and Luna Lovegood were not cool, sage, wiser than they appeared characters. They were fucking crazy. They were out of their mind. They were not telling the future. Luna is not a wise and beautiful young girl. They're just crazy as shit.

Stop worshiping them. They're crazy. That feels so awful to say. That is so specifically targeted. I know. I know that there's a subset of the fan that really really adores the quirkiness I am a Harry Potter fan. I've watched all the movies and all those the creature what the hell the creatures the new ones Oh, I haven't seen the new ones with

Where to find them magical creatures and where to find them whatever the hell it's called I'm a huge fan get you tell that Just awful to say cuz I like both of those characters quite a lot. This is awful. It's just like the Dursleys were right. Harry was an awful kid, and he should have conformed. He deserved the treatment he got. Mrs. Dursley was right.

Harry's room was too big. I got to say, like, wait, that was much, much improved but just how how focused bob's dig there was it was so it was like a laser into someone's heart someone is raging so i hate it so much i gotta give the second one to bob as well well now i've got an idea of how how deep we're going so we're going right for it dark wade awful we should be getting like threats from these our opinions here at distractible don't represent our opinions because i don't think i feel this way this is all for a laugh okay i probably don't believe anything i i definitely don't believe anything i said and i probably don't believe the word i'm

gonna say don't either but man look guys this is what it's like don't worry see it doesn't matter how much we justify it no matter what we put an opinion out there i know we're both so we're embracing it's like the cancel this episode where people take these audio clips out of context and they end up on like cbs news or something that was literally the inspiration i really i was talking to amy i was like what's great what's an episode that could be taken so badly out of context? It's like just sound bites that could be extracted. I'm like sitting here itching myself. I'm so uncomfortable with this. Let's do more. What got me really thinking about it was Amy and I were talking just last night because I have an ongoing theory that most of the posts on Reddit are absolutely fake. They're completely 100% fabricated because we thought of something to post on a subreddit

that would have been unbelievably confusing it's like the same thing about how on reddit it's like the subreddit today i fucked up is just today i fucked up when i was boning my sister and i blew my over yeah in the middle of dinner you know just like that's exactly like that whole subreddit is just like made up bullshit i know that it has to be because it's just that asinine there is occasionally truth but it's just going on out of your way to believe that everything is on the internet is a lie is going to save you a lot of trouble however this reminds me that philosophy document on bullshit everyone should read it is it is it is that real no it is no there's a document called on bullshit in philosophy yeah oh so it's a modern it's just. It is. No, there's a document called On Bullshit in Philosophy.

Yeah. Oh, so it's a modern. It's just the title is just referential. It argues that bullshitting is more dangerous to our society than lying or truth telling. Oh, I believe it. I absolutely believe it. It's an excellent read. Yeah, it is.

It is a book. Who's it by? What's the other name? It's a paper. I want to say his name is like William Frankfurter, but I might be wrong. Frankfurt. Harry Frankfurt. Harry Frankfurt.

Yeah. Interesting. So anyway. All right. But you don't get a point for that way i'm sorry okay that was true so that's worthless i'm sensing a trend with today that's fine you're kidding me you're more ruthless than me all the time all right how about you say the most savage shit out of nowhere that's just me being me whenever you try you're worse than i am it means more coming from you no matter what you say when you're mean it means more deeper yeah no matter what i say today it's gonna seem worse whatever you say because you're usually the nice one in everyone's eyes because i'm the nice one it's fine it's fine it's fine you'll get there wade because the next one is something that i think everyone

can have a gripe against no matter what our own communities no there's nothing I don't know what you're talking about I had a good one for that I'll go we're going to Disney right so Disney is a very broad fan base it's like some people like the park some people like the movies you can pick a specific movie you can pick a specific type of person, a super Disney person or whatever. And Bob will go first for this round. Remember, you can abstain. Wait. Excellent. Okay.

Okay. I've got one. People like to talk a lot of shit about Disney adults. Disney adult people, you know, millennials, people like 25 and older who go to Disney just for themselves. I've done that a couple of times. I hold nothing against them. It's not their fault.

It's their parents' fault. Maybe if somebody had loved them, they wouldn't need to relive the childhood they wish they had in their adult years. But the truth that undercuts everything that Disney adults are trying to achieve is that the Disney parks are not that fun. You can see through the thin veneer of bullshit, to the sad character actors, to the run-down, painted-over, slapped-together finishes, to the less-than-exciting rides in the park. You could see through all of it if you just took those rose-colored, parent-loveless-relationship glasses off.

There are better things to do with your time. Live the childhood you wish you had i believe in you ah i hate this so much i'm like i'm like a super robot oh i'm sorry god no it's so funny god it's so that was so it literally hurts my insides while i'm saying these things but however however however i that was wonderful. But I completely agree when it comes to the parks, right? There is a certain charm about it. But really, in all honesty, I've been to the Disney many times now. The rides are okay at best.

The rides are all right. They are fine. They are not worth the lines that people sit through for hours. And then just like the changes that they make to the parks are so asinine, they remove any charm. So that they've devised a system, especially with the new FastPass system, where people are looking at their phones more than they're looking at the actual environment around them. So it doesn't even matter because they're trying to cheat the system to get the fastest times to get to these mediocre rides. Maximize the fun, Mark. Yeah, maximize the fun at everyone else's expense.

But, okay, Wade, it is now your turn. All right. To all of those out there that grew up watching Disney movies and you saw the Disney princess try to find their prince charming and live their pampered, spoiled, bitch-ass little lives, just know that that's fake. There is no prince charming out there holding your fucking shoe waiting for you.

Life is about meeting someone. You find mutual interest. Maybe it works out. Oftentimes it doesn't. There's no dream, magical, happy fucking ending. We're all miserable in this shit together. So get over your little dreamy, I hope this happens and he finds me bullshit. And you're not going to find your princess out there either.

It's just people with fucking flaws. And maybe you make it through life together maybe you get divorced and you live alone and miserable that's life i feel good about that one man i felt good to get out i know what you're trying to bait and i also know who you are from that one that's a divorced dad on a disney soap red. That is right there taking out the anger. That's a dad looking at the happy memories at Disney, you know, the photos that are still on his nightstand and he's

on the internet. That was like less bait and more just unleashing anger. They both kind of were. I felt the purity of the rage and I could see the backstory in Wade's more. I have to give Wade the point for that one just in the intensity of it.

Man, winning these feels worse than losing them, I think. I know, right? And if you at home want to come up with bait of your own, feel free to write terrible, horrible Oh man, the subreddit is gonna be such an awful place for a while

now. Oh no, I'm so'm so sorry look it's all in good fun everybody but at the same time we're doing this to help you there are people out there that really have no care one way or another about your liking something but they that's most people get over yourself okay calm down there's no point sorry guys channel is something no points. I'm sorry, guys. Channel is something. But there are people on the internet that literally just troll for a living because they get something out of it. They like responses. So be aware of it. We're educating people in terms of how to steal their souls.

Not steal their souls. Steal S-T-E-E-L. Everyone with your crushed dreams out there, you're stronger for it. Get over it. Do you guys have more Disney or do you want to move to a different one? Oh, i'm good i'm fine with that resolution i don't know if i have a stronger disney one all right here's an easy here's an easy target here's an easy target twilight wade you're up first but take your time

to think about it twilight it's the punching bag of fandoms it is as much as like even i have watched all the movies amy loves the twilight movies i can't but not because they're good and i think like this is a fandom that might be a little more self-aware i'm gonna go the opposite route and i'm gonna go after everyone who hates on twilight including myself here i've never read the books i've never seen the movies but whenever people liked twilight god it was so easy such big, strong move to jump on the bandwagon of fucking pussy shits that were afraid to say anything and actually go watch it because the cool thing to do was to hate on it.

Wow, look at you. You're so tough. Never gave it a chance, but oh man, better love story than Twilight. Ha ha ha. Laugh it off because you're in the popular crowd. You just walked right on over and somebody enjoyed something something had to dare to enjoy something that other people criticize easier to hate on them and pick on the little guy oh it makes you such a big strong person doesn't it no you're a bitch give it a chance watch it read it don't just jump where the popular crowd

is my god way to take the easy route fucking lazy pieces of shit i love the reverse bait angle because it reads just like a copy pasta you know the what the fuck did you say to me you little shit i'll have you know i'm an american sniper with over 300 confirmed kills like you sound exactly like it's just it was too it's too easy to go after twilight because that's all i've heard my entire life so the more challenging bit for me was the like okay what do we stand up for i don't know i just that was my muse my inspiration i went with all right that's fair bob would do you have one take your pick dude i know a little bit about twilight but fuck twilight and all the things I've never read or seen.

All right. At the heart of a lot of discussions surrounding the Twilight franchise is the asinine debate between Team Edward and Team Jacob. It's not a debate. It's not even close. Edward is a piece of shit.

Edward is controlling, domineering. Edward doesn't love Bella because he wants a life partner, companion, someone to share things with. He loves Bella because he thinks he can manipulate her. He thinks he can control her. He thinks that she will do whatever he wants. He's a prick. Welcome to real life relationship, Disney princesses. This is my bait.

Welcome to real life relationship, Disney princesses. This is my bait. The only choice that should have been made was whether or not to ever speak to Edward again. Because they did have a child. And I know that that whole thing is weird. Jacob is who Bella belongs with. Is he a kid? Jacob is the one who cares. He's warm.

Also, he turns into a dog, which is adorable. And not only does he defend, he protect, whatever. He also attack. He's big. He's scary. He can save her. He can keep the family safe. Edward is an asshole.

Plus cold like the vampire he is on the inside. You convinced me. Team furries. All right. So, Bob bob that was wonderful because not only was it targeted not only did you pick the underdog literal side you also came at it from a place of ignorance and like you dug your heels in and made old meme references it hit so many of my criteria for good bait that you'd be debating if you wanted to you would have a thread of comment

replies in reddit like a hundred comments deep that is that is definitely a winner for twilight all right i went after more people i want to jump in with my own just to feel like because i like i want to contribute please no we'd love for you to throw your career away with us i want to say edward is a 100 year old creep who for some reason sticks around in high school just to hang around a bunch of high schoolers he is over a hundred years old or even or close to it and oh no true love with a junior in high school i'm pretty sure it smacks of that quote from whatever that movie was where the guy says high schoolers that like, I may get older, but they always stay the same age. That's Edward. So your team, Edward.

I have another one for Jacob. Jacob is equally as creepy. He fell in love with a baby. And there's so many things I could say wrong about that i would just love i just don't even want to think about it anymore happily ever after so anyway that is uh you guys got more twilight nope i think i'm driving after what i wanted to go after me only half of that fandom approximately maybe is gonna come after me so maybe less i don't know how popular jacob is most people are in that fandom right so no one will come after me for that oh absolutely not absolutely not excellent all right you guys want to move on i got another one please oh please yes no who went first on that last one i can't

remember was it wade me okay my idea wait i got one that i think you're gonna like because it's one that has been prevalent and standing staying power supernatural okay yeah so wait i know you've watched supernatural and i know you were a big fan of it like and i know that it ended a few years ago bob i'm sure that you have you watched supernatural bob no okay i'm googling i. I'm going to put one together. I'm not forfeiting this. I can't say that I've ever watched an episode of Supernatural, but I'm going to try to summarize it without actually Googling anything. There's two dudes.

One of them is a dude. The other is an angel, question mark. And they're a crime fighting duo who try to stop. Uh-oh. Wade's face is dropping. You want me to describe it? No, no, no. I got it. I got it. And they're a crime fighting duo who try to stop. Oh, it's me to describe it. No, no, no,

I got it. I got it. They're a crime fighting duo. Whenever there's bad demons that come up from hell, they got a band together, wrist to wrist and deport them back to hell. It's a, it's basically a side story of Constantine.

You know, Constantine, you want the real description you want you know constantine with yeah give me your version wait i'm just curious i know i know about constantine i'm just curious the show is about two brothers who grew up hunting different supernatural creatures in the world after their mother was killed by a demon when they were young along the way they attack bigger and bigger threats affecting not just like locals or individuals but the world as a whole and they meet angels demons and make allies and friends with people on both sides ultimately culminating in some ending i've not gotten to yet

because i quit watching it after season 12 isn't that the story of full metal alchemist i don't know i've never seen that as That's two brothers whose mother dies. I've got a criticism ready, but I went first last time, so I don't know if you want me to wait, but I can go for one. Yeah, yeah, vamp, vamp. I'm working on it. Alright, so Wade, you'll go first in this one. So the reason, even before you started speaking, this is the one I was going to go after. You said it was about two individuals, a man and an angel, right? about two individuals a man and an angel right because one of the biggest talked about things in this whole fucking show has nothing to do with anything that happens on screen any of the great

acting any of the great writing which you know got a little bit tougher after season five because they finished their story but they kept going for the views is people who could not get over shipping dean and castiel castiel wasn't even a character in the show till season three. He's a funny like, you know, side character becomes a main character. He's great. But everyone, everyone, even the actors at this point are like, Destiel, ship Dean, Castiel, they belong together. The show's about these brothers, their journey through life, having to constantly sacrifice themselves and put their lives on hold to make the world a better place. But all you can think about is hope there's some dick between those angels wings tonight

because you're obsessed. You're gross. Get over yourselves. That's not what the show is about. Who gives a fuck about your sick fucking mind and the weird thoughts you have? Move on. Enjoy the show for what it is and go write your own little weird fan fictions and keep them to yourselves.

Because God, I don't need to hear the word destiel one more goddamn time in my fucking life you're gross and you're weird and no one likes you i fear wade i fear that you have risen to the bait i fear that you have become that which you seek to destroy i don't actually mind it if someone said one word in a post it was like destiel that that ramp would be the that which takes the bait however i do appreciate the intensity of the rant thank you it comes from a place of knowledge and i appreciate misha collins who plays destiel actually supports it and he's like actually yeah i think that that's canon so they've not in the show but after the show the actors are like yeah sure that's canon why not bob you have a you have a very easy opening here a very easy

counter this online research type of doing has been very unhelpful all right i i have an angle i think okay dear fans of supernatural yes i'm. I don't mind that you enjoy the show. I think it's great that you have something that you love so much and are so passionate about. I'm sorry that there are only really five decent seasons of this show that you care so much about, even though there are somehow 15 total. I don't understand how that ratio works. I don't know why it wasn't canceled. But no matter how much you love it, despite all of its flaws,

I have a secret to tell you. It is not a pop cultural icon. Do not mention this show you love so much in the same breath as Breaking Bad or Game of Thrones. This show is nothing. When history remembers awesome pop culture moments this won't even be a whisper of a thought in the back of the mind of history nobody cares how much you love it it's great for you but it is not a moment it is not an icon it is a tv show that lived a good childhood and died a slow drawn out low budget death i don't know anything

about this show but i feel like that's a way to cut at them pretty good i think most supernatural fans would agree that the last 10 seasons didn't live back up it was originally written for five and they kept extending it and everything was great and actually production went up but the writers wrote themselves into a hole by having like the ultimate villain in season five and then they were like this guy what do we attend season more he thinks it belongs in the upper echelons but it doesn't the first five seasons do don't kid yourself that's not how this works shows are remembered in their entirety you're taking the bait you're taking the bait the bait where i have to i'm going to the reddit no i i think i think just from the sheer cutting of that,

like, I felt the anger about Destiel, and I was wondering if, Bob, you were just going to go like, Destiel is real, and that would be your only bait. I would have given you the win. I would have given you. But I think just like,

despite Wade's advanced knowledge, and he rose to that bait, he did. Even if there's a slight slip, I got to give it to Bob again, like, with the points. Okay, yeah, easy there's a slight slip, I got to give it to Bob again, like with the points. Okay. Yeah. Easy.

Just give me a topic I know nothing about. And it's easy to be really mean about shit that you know nothing about. I'll tell you what, I feel way less bad about that one than I did about the first couple. I don't know if I took the bait because I agreed. I mean, I agree with you. You said, but you said the first five seasons were great. Then after that, it really just died off. The first five seasons, like a paragon of of tv history is it a show to be remembered

man it's hard to remember like at the time i feel like i probably felt that way but after seeing the other seven seasons that i have seen like my passion and love for the franchise definitely wore off the point i've not even finished the show so it's hard to put myself back in that mindset of after seeing the first five i don't remember how I felt at that point. It sounds like someone rising to the bait I can hear it in your voice longing Anyway, do what you do give him the point. We're gonna We're gonna know so the mark likes me better. We're gonna move away. We're gonna move away from TV shows Statistically mark lets you win more than we've seen that's all we know

I've been one of the most even haven't I been the most most even? We've all been pretty even. I don't remember. I just wanted to say that. You took my bait, Mark. Is that a point for me? You fucking took that bait quick. You got me there. You got me there, man. I'm going to give you a point.

You're right. I jumped right on that. I'm sorry. Oh, yeah. See, that's good bait because it's so quick. You don't even notice that it's bait. I think that's definitely a great example. It was unintentional on my part, too. Yeah, see, it just happened.

So we're going to move to a different topic because we've talked about this just recently. We're going into video games. Yes. Minecraft. Oh, yes. Fans of Minecraft are abound. topic because we've talked about this just recently we're going into video games yes minecraft oh yes fans of minecraft are abound it has been around since way long ago our history is in minecraft then it fell out a little bit and then suddenly oh it's back again like everyone's just discovering it new and all of a sudden couldn't be more popular well i think it's actually on the fading

but it's been huge for a long time though yeah. Yeah, exactly. So I think, Bob, it is your turn to go first. OK, prepare as much as you'd like. And then whenever you're ready, deliver the bait. Chum the waters, if you will. You can't deny that Minecraft has sold millions of copies, however many. It's insane. And you can't deny that some very smart people have done some incredible things, making computers and contraptions and using the

technical stuff in Minecraft to do very cool, effectively very inefficient and clunky programming of various different kinds. But what I think is the most asinine thing that people tout about Minecraft is that it's any world you want it to be. It's all these worlds. You can build your own world. You can make mods and you can have all these rules and monsters, anything you can dream of. As long as you dream in one meter by one meter by one meter cubes, it does not represent a world. It represents a visualization of your stupid imagination. You're effectively a four-year-old playing in the sandbox,

imagining that a little shit pile of damp sand is a castle and that you have a magic cape that allows you to fly around your sandbox kingdom and build whatever little shit piles of sand you want. It's nothing. It is nothing. It does nothing. It only allows you to reflect your own idiocy back on yourself. does nothing it only allows you to reflect your own idiocy back on yourself it's a play thing to occupy the dim mind of idiots so enjoy your stupid pointless world i'll be out here in the real one having experiences that matter that was quite a rant it's not really personal i don't like that so much anger in there all right right, Wade, your bait. Sure.

Minecraft has changed so little in like 10 years. And they just re-released. You know why it has so many sales? Because they did the same shit Grand Theft Auto 5 did. Oh, Minecraft. Minecraft for the Switch. Minecraft for the PlayStation 3. Minecraft for the PlayStation 4.

Minecraft for the PlayStation 3. They sell the same shit to the same people on different platforms.'s how they get their sales the game hasn't changed and people that still enjoy minecraft in 2022 are the same people that high school was the best time of their lives and the rest of their lives are they can't move on to bigger and better things because they think they've found the epitome and they're so glued to their love of their blocky worlds that they have forgotten that new games come out new things are out there to be enjoyed, and they don't need to just keep enjoying those cubes Bob was referencing. There's more out there. You have more life to live. And if you're enjoying yourself so goddamn much in a game that's 10, I don't know how fucking old it is at this point because it's looked the same for over a

decade. So enjoy yourself. I'm glad that that's the epitome of your life while we're out here enjoying newer and better things. All right. This is a lot of hate and anger. I feel like it's deviating into a roast more than bait. Okay. I'm going to enter into this round myself and I'm going to throw some bait. Oh, please. All you Minecrafters out there, bedrock is better than Java in every way, period. End of bait.

Don't even know what that means. Sounds great though. I guarantee you, Minecrafters know. Do you want to know why? I know the difference, but I don't understand why what that means sounds great though i guarantee you minecrafters know do you want to know why i know the difference but i don't understand why that's bait i guess what's the difference it would be equivalent of me saying bait of minecraft got better after microsoft bought it okay that makes sense but it's the same i'll give you like a tenth of a point for that myself trust me when i say as far as bait goes bait in in terms of getting people to respond angrily to you i think like the best bait comes from place of almost like passive aggressive haughtiness you

think you're better than them or you say something with such confidence and so succinctly that it is so incorrect that people have to be upset at you in every way possible so minecraft i would say like minecraft isn't the best game in the last decade minecraft won't even the best game the people have to be upset at you in every way possible. So Minecraft, I would say like Minecraft isn't the best game of the last decade. Minecraft won't even be the best game the year it came out. That would be bait. That would be good bait. Excellent. Also, I could say the people you met in Minecraft aren't actually your friend. They don't mean anything to you and they will never mean anything to you because they don't actually care about you. Wade. Interesting. No one you've ever met on Minecraftcraft means anything wow

you're right dude oh my wife shit is that bait molly's gonna come after me i just baited my wife no yeah i'm gonna call that a wash for now uh if you guys would like to try another one in minecraft or we can move on to another one do you want to try all right move on oh if you want to no i was just asking i can move on because i got another really good one for you all right move on oh if you want to do no i was just asking i can move on because i got another really good one for you all right okay the battle ripe with potential with a fan base it is ready to gnash and wail of teeth okay five nights at freddy's oh okay five nights at freddy's the legendary game has spawned maybe even spawned my resurgence, my rise. I'm the king of Five Nights at Freddy's. I guess I've got one. Yeah, wait, you're first, right? I guess. To be succinct,

I'll say the same thing about FNAF that I said about Minecraft a second ago. FNAF is not a great game. It's not a great game franchise. It wasn't the best game of the decade. It wasn't even the best game the year it came out. It did something something new but the reason people cared about FNAF was because they couldn't put their story in a coherent manner So they were curious what the fuck was going on and because of overreacting Let's players like us three who put things on there got scared and you got to laugh instead of having to play it and be Scared for yourself FNAF is not interesting the story at this point if you go even try to comprehend But the stories at this point, it's so stupid and convoluted it's not even mildly interesting so game writing and everyone just wants to know what the happened and that's why it's maintained interest for

however long it's been out pretty succinct I can't disagree with any of that Bob what do you have to say all right well Wade focused a lot on the lore of the game, but I think any lore beyond the first game in the franchise is all bullshit. You know why there's more than one game in the Five Nights at Freddy's franchise? Because Big Daddy Cawthorn realized he could milk you morons for millions and millions of dollars. There's nothing. He made it up as he went along. It's meaningless. You know what it is?

It's dollars in his bank account. You know what it is? His dollars and his bank account. That's what it is. Fair enough. Fair enough. Fair enough. All right. It's tough to decide between the two of those. I think that Wade, by sheer quantity of different targets,

hit a lot more that could get a rise out of a few more people. Because I'm trying to judge this purely on how many people are actually going to respond to these i think that with bob the animosity towards scott cawthon like at this point in it might not get as many people angry as wade did so i'm going to give wade the point for that one nothing to say you're not happy about that i'm just happy to take my win you didn't seem very happy if you like fnaf you have bad taste it's pretty straightforward dude that's a bait that's such a more succinct bait that's such a good one the contest is over you can stop well at the end i thought of it just just pretend like you already lost and when you

start and then say what you want to say then when you're really angry yeah you just wrap it up so my my bait alarm goes off at the end that's when the ideas come i told you you're way more savage than i am you just gotta turn it into a quip and that's what it's gonna be he's gonna be so quick i know but i can't just like the way my quips work is they come out naturally in conversation i can't just think and be like, quip. My quips just come to brain. Well, you imagine a lot of conversations with yourself in your head. Just imagine a conversation before you speak. I don't waste time in my head with FNAF.

That sounds bad. That's another bait, I guess. Damn. Turns out Mark is king of nothing. Sorry, Mark. You want to take the bait again? You about to? Come on. Security breach is the best Five Nights at, Mark. You want to take the bait again? You about to? Come on.

Security Breach is the best Five Nights at Freddy's, hands down. Which one is that? Is that the one where there's ghost kids inhabiting animatronics? Or is that the other one? No, that's all of them. Security Breach is a great one with 3D and free roaming entertainment. In them. Five Nights at Freddy's, the Freddy Fazbear pizza plex.

I think I know which one you're referencing with Security Breach but isn't there another one where you can freely roam and do like little RPG battles? I have no idea. The only game with a more confusing series of sequels than Five Nights at Freddy's is Kingdom Hearts. FNAF World? Was it FNAF World? Wasn't there one called World?

Is that a fan game or something? I don't know. No, it was like one that came out and everyone was confused because it's like an RPG or something. I don't know. Whatever. Five Nights at Fuckboy's was better than Five Nights at Freddy's. That's such a good bait. That's such a good bait.

Came to mind now. I used it. You're making gold, man. But we're not in the round, so no more points to be awarded. Come after me, Adi. I'm just putting daggers in my own coffin here at this point. I think Wade actually hates Five Nights at Freddy's. He might actually sincere yeah might be do you guys want to try again or move on no wade one wade one again already my quips are out man i put my dick out there now it's already ready to be sliced all right so this next one might get you

in a lot of trouble this one actually could get you people coming after you. If you play your cards wrong here, you could actually get people to, uh, thank you. Great. Okay. K-pop.

Ooh, get some good K-pop bait out there. You're first. And it could, let me, let me, let me recap the things that K-pop people have done to attack uh i know off the top my head that they have done a spree of doxing people they have exposed people for past dirt that has been buried

deep in the earth they have under the guise of doing good they have tried to unearth crimes in the past and i believe that more than one has physically attacked people for their bad K-pop takes. And me, as a half Korean gentleman, I must try to defend my honor in this moment. I like how you literally lead us to the firing squad and the audience. The muskets are like, Bob and Wade, say something to get shot. You can abstain. I said from the beginning beginning you can say nothing i've got balls i'm ending my career for this i will win if it costs me my life

they're imaginary points for the privilege of coming up with the next idea no is it worth it i don't know fuck my dreams fuck my nightmares i'm gonna win all right bob end our careers and maybe our lives no bob you could abstain too no i'm doing it i got one all right okay oh is that right oh you like a k-pop star okay you like one of the guys let me guess is he tall really skinny and adorably cute okay fuck i can't i can't even i don't know about k-pop man god damn it oh man i can't i don't even know the name of a k-pop star like i know that some of the group names ted k-pop oh my god i don't want to just be like oh k-pop is bad it has to be something to it or otherwise what am i doing here we're going on a great path i do

appreciate you trying to like put more spin on it i will like you could finish it out let's stick the landing man come on oh you like one you know is he tall and skinny and cute oh what does he wear very fashionable clothes does he make little hearts with his hands and love everyone in his audience even though he doesn't know who a single person is outside of his bandmates and handlers. Wait, did he get a haircut? Oh, gosh. Tell me more. Fascinating.

Please go on. I love the handlers, because that's a little real. That's good. All right, wait. They're on the way to kill Bob right now. The fandoms of K-pop, as you've mentioned, are pretty ruthless. They're pretty bad. The treatment of K-pop stars by their management, the things that they put them through,

the contracts they have to sign to basically not have lives outside of their job, pretty bad. You know what's worse? The final product that they make. I think he's done. All right, my address is... Dude, you don't know how you started that. Like, because you said,

I get it, the fans are bad. And you just dug your grave at that first sentence. You know, I figured I'd go right for it. Yeah, bad, worse than the worst. And I wanted the... Okay, I don't'd go right for it. Yeah, bad, worse, and the worst. And I wanted to... Okay, I don't want to derail the episode. Yeah. And I'm not in any way trying to curry favor with the people who want to kill us right now or whatever.

I need that. Do you know enough to understand what the fuck is up with K-pop fandoms? Because, like, there are plenty of totally rabid fandoms out there that are overboard, that will go in on anyone who says a bad word about the thing that they're a fan of but the k-pop fandom is it just so big that like there's more you know people on the outliers who are you know maybe have weirder ideas or are willing to do crazier things to defend something they love so much because like k-pop isn't a thing that is like insane k-pop is cool i generally enjoy the music and i get it why people like it but there's also been some really crazy shit that people in that fandom

have done like you said it's just weird i think it's a combination right it's a combination of of certain things happening and overlapping at the same time the rise of the internet and social media on the internet a very intense fan base that feels passionate about a small underdog of a thing korea as a country as a strategic move to push korean culture and get an export of entertainment like emulating what america does in terms of pushing out entertainment they called it halloo which is like the korean wave as it pushed out into the rest of the world, all hitting at the same time. And then the explosion of these boy band groups in terms of like their performative ability and the demands, it is an intensely competitive field in terms of like these things.

So, so the performances themselves are actually incredible. Like if you've watched K-pop stars and bands dance and do their routines yeah they are like olympic level athletes in terms of their ability to sing and dance on stage it is an incredible performance which lends a lot of energy to the crowd who go to these things it's a really entertaining thing and it's all of these hitting at once creates like this fervor in the fan base to be aggressive about it and then given that there is this push to push it on to the rest of the world the fans that grab onto it they want to push it in to other people's view and so that rabidity gets a lot of push back of like what is this i don't you you keep shoving this down my

throat and so they get more rabid and it's like this constant battle and then there's this righteousness that they feel because the k-pop stars themselves are trying to like be good examples and like relatively not all of them of course like no one's perfect no no one ever is perfect but generally the idea is like good morals and trying to push that out so it creates this fervor of righteousness a lot of that's they're forced to do right their contracts are supposedly pretty rough that they have to sign to be part of these bands like some of the bigger ones it varies a lot yeah but i will say for the fandoms i love when there's like a horrible hashtag that's trying to trend and like the k-pop fandoms come in and they just take over the hashtag that's so good so like instead of like some racist thing being like

getting popularity it's just like all the k-pop clips and things like that's actually a pretty cool thing yeah i actually am trying to save my ass with that comment but it's not true no it's like it's true it's true there is a there's a lot to like about there's a lot of criticisms to make and i think like it's it's perfectly okay to say something that is critical of the K-pop or entertainment industry as a whole. There are always parts of it that are negative. However, that's not why we're here. Okay. I hate to say it.

We're all tied up. Who won that one? Wade did. Because like the pure death that is coming for him. Yeah, yeah. You remember what he said. Dude, you remember. Okay, so we're going to do this one,

and this might not be something that you guys are well-versed in, but it is one of the newest fandoms that is out there on the internet today. Okay. And it is kind of spilling over between games and entertainment. Okay. And it's kind of like a ripe for some good old-fashioned bait, and that is the backrooms. The entire fandom that revolves around the back rooms,

the people that consume it, the people that make content about it. It is a new game that is hitting big or it's not even a game. It didn't start that way. Basically another creepypasta that is a rose. And I believe it is Wade, your turn to go first. Okay.

People that like the back rooms are the same people that are obsessed with FNAF and they're just looking for the next stupid thing with no lore and lots of confusing things and lack of interesting plot to latch on to. I love it. It's very short Sweden to the point. You would get a lot of people arguing with you with that one, Bob. I didn't give you a lot of time to think about it, but you can take more time.

I literally don't know the first thing about the back room, so I'm just sort of... I've played it and I don't either. That the point looking at it wait your turn's over your turn's over yeah you're coming out i talked yet i'm still taking it man i'm stabbing multiple times one dagger wouldn't i guess you could keep going while bob's looking up if he's not ready i have one i have one i have one i think all. Okay. I'm pretty happy with what I had. Okay. The Back Rooms is the robot chicken of today's video game culture. You wander around, random shit happens, but I'm sorry to tell you, it means literally nothing. Is that cutting?

Is that good? That was pretty cutting. So long as people know what robot chicken was. Okay. Isn't it still on? Are they still making new robots? Is this still on? It's re-airing.

It's not new episodes, I don't think. Yeah. Oh, man. Both of those were great in different ways. I could see just because the cleverness of saying it's the Robot Chicken of the new media. It's just, it is very cutting. That's a compliment to me. I liked Robot Chicken.

Yeah. Also, I know that a lot of people like Robot Chicken, but it's just an accumulation of random eight second ideas it's nothing no that's what makes that's what makes your thing beautiful because also robot chicken fans would be mad at you i know well yeah so it's ill it's tight who you could have us go again i guess i guess if you think it needs a tie break it was pretty close but uh do you guys got another one? I have another one. Kind of. You can go first that time and I'll go after you then.

I will weigh all of the roasts. If we do another one, I'll weigh all the bait together from both. If you guys want to go again. I got one. I got one. Okay. All right. Okay.

I finally figured out why people are so hyped up about the back rooms. It's because it's just as stupid, if not more asinine, than all of the SCP games. Oh. Oh. Oh, that one hurt me. Don't fall for it. It's a bait, Mark. Oh, man. Okay. me don't fall for it it's a bait mark oh man okay so you took part of what i was gonna say

which makes it tougher but i say whatever you're gonna say it's hard to even want to criticize the back rooms because of shitty horror franchises like fnaf scp and now the back rooms it's not even really worth criticizing because there's nothing there to criticize half the game you're wandering around alone in the dark and then whenever you do an encounter an enemy it's not even really worth criticizing because there's nothing there to criticize half the game you're wandering around alone in the dark and then whenever you do encounter an enemy it's just a recycled fucking scp from another game woo glad they decided to put them in back rooms which means what what is a back room just a room in the back terrifying way to waste my time with this topic and with the game and all the other bullshit y'all have made about it let it die like it should have been from the start. All right. These are great.

Boys, you have done a wonderful job providing me with incredible bait. I will be avoiding the Reddit for the next foreseeable lifetime. I thank you for your contribution in somehow driving our fan base towards toxicity instead of... We don't have any K-pop fans in our audience

because man, oh man. Like the responsible stewards we are yes people who watch and listen to this remember usually we try to encourage goodness but i have to assign a winner here to the most toxic of you not because he went first of the idea but because it was more succinct and cutting in the very end and made my soul hurt and made me want to rise to the bait i grant the winner to bob honestly i'll take the loss on this one i'm okay i don't think i said anything that bad i think if anyone has a problem with what i said today they're just a big baby ah delicious delectable tally another win in the bob column for mark everybody out there keeping

track shocking it really was pretty even way i don't know i used to it would the last time it was tracked he had like two or three more picks for me than for you which is pretty even considering that he had like 18 picks whatever you say man i'm surprised you're not more angry that mark wins more than either of us well we try to keep him happy so that we can keep the show running listen guys listen guys we can't rise to running. Listen, guys, listen, guys. We can't rise to each other's bait. Now can we? No one listens to Distractible for Wade and Bob.

They listen for Mark and Friends. So we got to keep Mark happy. Awesome. Thank you. We're acknowledging it. All right. The bait that Mark's like, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, but I like this bait.

All right. Well, thank you, Bob. Do you have any parting baiting words for people? Or would you like to try to redeem yourself? I don't know. This whole thing seemed pretty pointless. I think if you enjoy podcasts, you're probably just low IQ. I'm not sure. Whatever.

Thanks for the win, I guess. Thank you. Wade, would you like some parting words of bitterness? Here comes the best bait of the entire episode. Go. No pressure. I think that this episode made me realize how our careers

are all dependent on kind of people liking mindless bullshit like the games that we play and our commentary which is the same as every other person's basically commentary. Let's be scared and react to horror shit. Let's make dumb penis jokes and then say goodbye and act like we know every single viewer that we have out there who probably doesn't care about us that much and while they think we care about them you're all fucking money in the

bank y'all jesus i don't think that was bait i think it was just that was real that was the realest shit you'll ever hear i don't't know what that was. You know what charity streams are? Tax write-offs. Fuck y'all. Fuck the world. There it is. See? It's always at the end. You could have won it, Wade. You could have had this.

I don't want to win it. It was there all along. I'm going to lose with my dignity intact. Anyway, thank you so much for being a part of it. If you listened to the end of this are you really uh can you say you're any better than us hmm can you yeah probably you probably can anyway remember to follow this uh subscribe to the youtube channel check out our merch store store.distractablepodcast.com you can find bob through my skirm he's now on twitch so

you know direct all your hate there uh wade you know, LordMinion777 or Minion777, you know where to find him. I am completely anonymous. I've never existed. Fuck you, Markiplier. And thank you all so much for listening. We'll be back maybe again next week if we have not been driven off the platform. But we will keep trying every week to be driven off if this one doesn't work with Bob as the host. Thank you.

Podcast out.