Distractible - We Might Have Started The Fire

Episode Date: June 21, 2024

Wade desperately seeks help from the guys to update Billy Joel's classic hit. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Good evening, gentle listener, and welcome to Distractable. This episode, workhorse Wade forgets the brilliant burls, assigns anger acknowledgements, and asks for a handy with some lush lyrics. Babysick Bob the Stupendously Stickless crushes computer voids and gets behind Chris Rock. Madcap Mark has fan issues, tanning tension, and gets thoughtfully thwarted. From Bred, Fred and Furbies, to three pins. Yeeees! It's time for...

We Might Have Started the Fire. Now sit back and prepare to be distracted, and enjoy the show. How's it going, everyone? Boys are back. Welcome to another episode of Distractable. Yay. I'm today's host, Wade, joined by Mark and Bob, who also faded in with me.

How you guys doing? Good! I was trying to match the energy. Was that not the energy? I'm stupendous. That's good. Anything new? I might explode.

Oh? I will give you ten points if you explode randomly on camera. I don't know if edited in counts. Editors, can you make that bathtub Mark needs to be in explode again? So there was a day a while back now where Mark and I recorded Bread and Fred because Bob I think you couldn't be here, you had to leave earlier or something. That's a good game, yeah. Mark posted it recently.

I was reading the comments on the video and everyone was like, oh my God, Mark's finally not in the tub anymore. And then someone was like, no, Wade posted this a minute ago. This was before the tub. Mark might still be there. Half of the comments were just obsessed with whether or not Mark was ever leaving the tub. Man, people really love the tub. You should get a tub in your house, they're good. Yeah, have you ever had a tub in the house you live in, Mark? Never, never. I have no

evidence of a tub existing in my life. I'm not 100% sure. I think one of the fans in my computer has just misaligned and is now buzzing against the frame. Oh, sick. Well, it's too bad you bought such a cheap computer, you know? If you had gotten a nice name-brand one, you wouldn't have this sort of problem. Everything else, like, technologically, that was fine. The annoying thing was, I had committed this morning to waking up and meditating. Last night, I had read a big thing about how important meditation was, and I've said it before, and I fell out of it with all the Work that I was doing I was so ready

I've been getting good sleep finally for a first time in a while got in a back home yesterday Like this is the start of the brand new me Oh, no, I got bad news for you. I gotta wake up and I slept in a lot I slept in which is ordinarily great But about 930 I roll over and look at my phone and I see text from these bozos over here We're like mark you good mark you good. I didn't say it last night. Did I I didn't say I was good last night No, you didn't which is why we harassed you this morning Or something cuz I didn't see it cuz I just rolled in No, you didn't, which is why we harassed you this morning. Double texted or something, because I didn't see it,

because it just rolled in yesterday. I'm ready to start my new life. I'm like, oh shit, ha! Yeah, I hate whenever I have a driving thing I've gotta do, and then my phone just doesn't get the texts. It's wild how that happens. Like your phone's just like, well, you had to drive today.

You couldn't possibly have text to read. Oh yeah, the automatic like, do not disturb stuff. It's like, I shouldn't know, but the thing is like for the past four months, I've had the luxury of not having to wake up, not early. Nine isn't that early, Wade. It's pretty early, Judge, Wade. I get up at 9 a.m. Pacific.

You don't though, you complain about that that's still early sometimes. It is, but I live dude Hawaii If I was in Hawaii, I would be like a 10 a.m. Riser. I'm a Hawaii You could tell by my tan dude if you lived in Australia, you would have been up yesterday That's true. I was getting in tan just from just from being on the road The Sun has been a brutally intense not only is it, but we're at a place of peak activity. You can even see on my forehead because I was wearing the the headband.

I've got a tan line. You've got a headband tan line. You can see like it's slightly more tan here and slightly less tan here because driving driving back, you know, going west, you I always forget. I don't know how, but I always forget that you've got the sun just blasting in your face for the last part of the day. And there's a lot of like solar activity today. You know going west you I always forget I don't know how but I always forget that you've got the Sun just Blasting in your face for the last part of the day And there's a lot of like solar activity today And I have no idea if that actually increases the amount of like UV rays pumping out of the Sun

But uh it was brutal was I saying there was something else so I had another point to this you started your day wanting to meditate Right fuck you guys Yeah, how dare we do this thing that we've been doing for like two or three years the same day It was problematic because I got up and it was like the morning of interrupted actions because I was like I gotta go Well, I take care of the dogs. Oh shit. I gotta go bathroom. Oh, man. I gotta make a coffee Oh, no, Amy's making coffee. All right, I'll take care of the dogs. Oh, she already got the dogs taken care of So it's like there's nothing that was going wrong in my life, but I felt really aggravated

because there was so many little things that just like, oh no, I know that feeling. Is there a word for that feeling? I feel that exact feeling a lot. Yeah, it's something about I go to do something and it's already done. That should be a good thing or it's like, it's a little thing trips up what I was doing

It should be okay, but it was like And in my mind I was like you didn't meditate you didn't meditate you didn't meditate And it was like I got here I these guys can attest I was pissed off when I arrived I was all He hopped into the call and initially he couldn't hear us and we couldn't hear him he hopped into the call and initially he couldn't hear us and we couldn't hear him. He hopped into the call and was literally like, disappear. Oh man, that's a good start. Well, he said something, he tried to say something, he popped in, he was like, and then click. For those who are only listening, Wade looked in the camera with a half a smile and then frowned and then left and that's what I did. Oh, yeah,

dude. It went from like, I'm kind of annoyed, but like I'm here to motherfuck like gone. So are we doing small talk? Is that we're doing right now? Yeah, yeah. What's up, guys? We inspired a book. The tree poachers by Zack bolt? It was inspired by the I think it was a bonus episode we did about the burles and the dedication says for Mark, Bob and Wade of Distractable. Hello, Mark, are you taking the longest drink of coffee in history or are you frozen? Hello. coffee in history or are you frozen? Hello? He's gone!

Hahahaha Hahahaha Hahahaha Hahahaha Hahahaha Remember that noise Mark was talking about his computer started making? I think something might have just

gotten horribly wrong Hello? Hi! Okay, alright, yeah that I think something might have just gone horribly wrong Hello, hi Okay, all right. Yeah that that was super weird my Ethernet adapter just failed I've never had that problem ever and it just started working again Or did you have to like go into the device manager or something? I switched to Wi-Fi if I go into my device manager My Ethernet is now appearing and disappearing and the whole adapter is like on and off. And what's weird is that's a motherboard integrated ethernet adapter.

Yeah, that's not great. I don't like that that happened. Then I heard that weird fan whirring. That might not be a fan. That might be the power supply. Yeah, you might be in trouble this episode. Hey, you know, Mark, I think Corsair actually released a new version of the Corsair one. You remember how you liked those so much might be time to might be time

for a new computer. No, because I'm so mad about that. I'm glad you brought that up. Wait, wait, wait, wait. So can we finish what I was saying before, though? The book. How much did you hear about the book? Because you were you froze taking a sip of your coffee and Bob one boy just like I was, oh, I talked for a solid minute and a half and then you were still taking, and I was like, Mark, are you gone? Or are you just taking the world's longest sip of coffee right now?

Cause you were just literally like, like, anyway, fuck God. Wade and I laughed the whole time you were gone, with you, not at you. Good, I'm glad I'm providing the yucks. Anyway, this book is fiction based on historical events where people try and poach pearls from redwood trees because they're very valuable. That's hilarious.

And it's dedicated to us because this author listened to that episode where we talked about that and was like, oh, cool, and then wrote a book about it. That's awesome. I'm going to buy a copy of that book. I have not read the book. I'm just going gonna throw that out. I'm not endorsing that I like this or anything. I plan to read it. Clearly I bought it. It's available on Amazon. But I just, I was, I got it in the mail the other day and I was like, I have to bring this up. This is very cool. And once I'm done reading it, I'll tell you if it's good or if it sucks a big ass. I hope that they also give credit to the original article that we

were talking about because I shamelessly was reading the story from the the original article. Let me actually say it right now just so I can. I will say part one of the book is called when shit hits the fan so I'm into that already. I just bought a copy of the book because like I need that in my life. It was so funny I want to make sure that it gets credit because it was just a really really funny article I didn't even find it first. I was a lead researcher Pam in the field I couldn't tell you what a burl is or was the fact that you guys are referencing this and remember it I have zero recollection of this ever happening

You don't remember us talking about the burls and the- I remember the word cause I was like that's a funny word But like I remember literally nothing else literally in the discord We're called the burls because of that episode and that's Yeah, I don't know what it is. Okay. Listen, you guys can laugh but like it's actually like one of those parts of my memory that makes me nervous is that if the fact that I cannot have I have no memory of that discussion. I just peeled to the back of the book because there's an acknowledgement section and there's

a paragraph where this person talks about how they grew up watching our YouTube videos and the sentence reads, their grasp on me go even further back to when I was a kid watching Mark play turbo dismount, watching Bob play I am bread and watching Wade be bald. Literally everywhere, even in the most serious of acknowledgments, Wade. I wasn't even bald to like three or four years. That's true. They were a kid, what, yesterday? Anyway, I'm looking forward to reading this book. I was, I kind of, can I refund my purchase? Oh, they also have stuff about cannolis in this paragraph.

That's a real listener right there. Anyway, I'll read it and I'll report back. On a similar note, I have a little something here that is a one-off. We will not do this for everyone, but this is a throwback to something that happened at conventions a while back. Derek Schultz, you're fired. Yeah.

What? What? You heard him, Derek Schultz. You're outta here. Your boss sent me a nice email and asked if I could do him a favor and it turns out you're being downsized So get your crap out of the office and turning your keys. You're out of here. What was your thing? Was that not your thing Wade and Kayla Mantone Kayla Mantone if you're out there say yes to marrying Felix Dizla Dizla

This is not we're not presenting an option. We're just telling you to say yes I don't know if that was what I was asked to do, but I am ordering you to say yes, so hopefully you're in a happy relationship and you're wanting to, but this is now an arranged marriage or something, I don't know. But you're welcome, got your back. Felix, I'll take payment through the normal ways. Probably won't be doing that for anyone else, but this was a special request. It reminds me of the proposals we used to do. You know what I proposed to Molly? You two know this.

I did it on stage and the same day there was another proposal request that we did at the same time and I always think about that. But we used to have a lot of proposal requests at conventions. But you just had to do yours first. I see how it is. We were walking around like we were constipated. We had to get that out of our system. We couldn't have done the panel otherwise. Who's we? What's happening? We as a collective were not on our a game

You might have been the most collected but like Sean Mark and I were all walking around like we had a stick shipped up our ass and it was very obvious in the video I had no sticks in my ass. I was fine mark. Do you have anything else you want to talk about before I jump into my stuff? I haven't talked about anything. I could remember because you had your long coffee sip. I Was gonna go into the spiel of all the hardware that I've come back to and talking about that and talking about the latest thing That's gonna make people so mad about me talking about it. I can't wait for people to be pissed off Is it a render farm? I forgot a drink You can't say that word in front of him. Render

farm? Did render farms kill his family? Yeah, probably. I'm going to go with yes. You ever swallow and immediately know you did it wrong and you're fucked. Did you just do that unrelated to me saying the word render farm or was that completely unrelated? I was just taking a sip and my body was like, I should breathe that! I do that all the time. I discovered that my brother also has the same issue. We both have trouble with swallowing sometimes. We like always, always get... You have a drinking problem? Yes.

Hehehehehehe But anyway, stop distracting me. Corsair 1, piss me off. You know why? Cause they're quitters. Because they couldn't do it. What does that mean? I feel like they just released a new computer. I confused what you mean. No, no, no, no, no. If you look at that new computer, you see what's wrong with it is it's double the size of the previous Corsair Ones. And if you look at it, oh, wouldn't you believe it, it's exactly the same as a normal small

form factor computer. The great thing about the Corsair ones is that they were a novel form factor, that was a pillar, just a pedestal, it had incorporated the liquid cooling so that the board on either side were split and two radiators were pulling air in and shooting it out the top. It was such a great design. It was probably hard to engineer and they quit and made this other one that is even more expensive than the one before. I bet they were losing money on the Corsair ones. I mean, that's a lot of engineering to make that form the original form factor. So prop.

But they already did the engineering. Have you seen how big 4090s are? This says that they come with Core i9, 4900Ks, and 4090s in them. Those things alone, the motherboard and that card, are bigger than the space that the original Corsair 1 occupied. But they're actually not because the board itself, the actual just the board, is not much bigger. Well, so what,'re going to custom design

a liquid cooling block and make an AIO liquid cooler for the graphics card and include that in it? That's what they did. I didn't realize that. I thought that was air cooled still. That had a liquid cooled graph. No, no, it was a custom water block for, and here's the thing.

Okay, well that's cooler than I thought it was. It's still a water block AIO in this new form factor. still, it's still a water block AIO in this new form factor. They did all of the steps up until making the fucking pedestal. And I get it. I'm not making products out here, but they made the product and it was great. And I loved it. I carried. Oh, there's a lot of dead space. And if you look at the chassis cutaways, there's a lot of empty space in there.

I know, and that's what's so tragic about it, is because you guys know I carried that... My old Corsair One. I carried it everywhere, because I could. I was using it all the way up and in when I was making this movie. I recorded all of my stuff on the road for the past few years on a Corsair One. And now this piece of shit comes out and it's Exactly the same as enough like I have to look elsewhere for a small form factor computer because they just didn't want just go bigger Mark have you tried a gaming laptop?

Not all good things come in small packages mark sometimes bigger is better like with penises it the density. It's about, it's not about girth. It's not about length. It's about density, right? Fill it up with like some foam or something. Put some of us in there. Look, I was totally not on your side until they show the there. If you go to the website, they show the inside of the case. All the extra space they added is just emptiness. It's, and I'm not saying it would be easy to just compact that all into the same sort of form factor as the first ones were, but it would totally fit. That's, that's entirely doable based on the amount of dead space. And I wonder if the thing was they would have needed a custom motherboard design or something? No, because they used a mini ITX, which is which is a standard size for those motherboards.

which is a standard size for those motherboards. Do mini-ITXs have all the channels and bandwidth for shit that you need for things like a 4090 and like- Yeah, cause it's still a mini-ITX in there. The motherboard is still the same size as what they had before. The graphics card, I'm not sure if it's exactly the same size, but it's a very similar size. And even if they didn't go with a 4090, why not just put a 4080 in there

They didn't do any of the the newest generation cards and my last Corsair one has and does not have a 3090 in it It has a 3080 and I'm fine with that because it's for the road. I didn't even need That's yeah, that's not why people buy these if you buy this computer It's because you want it to be as small as physically possible clearly You would not be bothered if you had an 80 series instead of a 90 series and something like this. They could still rectify this. They should come up with a Corsair point five. That's half the size. They should come out with a Markiplier edition.

Really small and angry. I would love it. And angry. You can turn your computer on just like, what the fuck you want? I'm trying to meditate Well, it starts to get really hot and the fans really start ripping it that gets to give that voice clip of mark where he shifts Gears while he's screaming. It's like OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Get up, guys. No, you know what, buddy? I'm sorry I brought it up. You're absolutely correct about that.

They are quitters, and I know exactly what you mean now that you've explained yourself. It's just disappointing, because for three generations now, they've had a better solution, a solution that I liked, and people started to enjoy. And the worst part is no one in the reviews called them out on this. No one in the reviews ever called them out on this.

No one mentioned anything about this different form factor. They were like, oh it's got wood paneling. I'm like you all are paid off by this company to like this and no one's saying the truth and I'm saying the truth and I like Corsair. Don't get me wrong. I like their stuff. I usually choose their peripherals and their modules when I'm building computers which I haven't done in a while but recently I have. I'm not a huge Corsair fan. I've had bad luck with some stuff like random bad luck, not their fault. That I just bought faulty RAM sticks and stuff.

The Corsair One was a thing I thought that they particularly did a really good job coming up with a product that's like that's not a widely needed use case, maybe necessarily, but that was a very specific use case that only that one thing occupied. There's nothing else like the Corsair One, the old Corsair One, that is available currently. You could custom build maybe something that's kind of that small, but it would not be as convenient and as good of an engineering package if you did it yourself. Yeah, absolutely. And it's just disappointing. That's really all it is. It just amounts to it being just disappointed. And I know what people are

gonna say is like, hey, if you build your own computer it's gonna all it is. It just amounts to it being just disappointed. And I know what people are gonna say is like, Hey, if you build your own computer, it's gonna be cheaper anyway. You can do a small form factor. It's like a lot of people don't have the technical know-how to make a small form factor computer. It's relatively easy to build a regular computer, because it's mostly nowadays plug and play. You plug this into this and it doesn't go in any other way. As long as you have enough physical space, it's not a big deal.

Yeah, small form factor takes some actual technical know-how. You have to de-shroud cards. You have to put it in a certain way. You have to get a case that's specifically for it and get cards specifically for that. And it's not just about getting a 4090. There are many vendors that make 4090s and their boards are different sizes. But could it be that heat's an issue? No, it wasn't in the first one. When it's water-cooled like that and the way they did the radiators, it actually worked.

It was an excellent solution because they had dual watercooled AIO radiators on either side. One for the motherboard and CPU side, one for the graphics card. It pulled air in from the sides, exhausted it out the top. It took advantage of the fact that hot air rises in thermal exhaust. It's what the Mac Pro, the trash can one, its whole concept was that it exhausts out the top and it's better. They still do that now with the Mac Studio, they just don't advertise it that way.

But when you orient a computer's fans and cooling system so that it- It confuses me that that's not the normal way all computers are set up, but I don't wanna talk about that right now. I, dude, I don't know, man. Whenever I see a top mount radiator with fans sucking in and I'm like but heat rises where's it gonna go? Like out the back down out the back obviously like heat likes to do. Yeah you know

heat likes to go you think heat only rises heat's complicated sometimes heat wants to go sideways backwards you don't even know. Sometimes heat relapses and gets cold. We've designed a system that frustrates the heat in the computer to the point where it gives up and gets cold. We call that Apple frustration. Yeah, man. I don't know. I apparently I'm the only one in the world that doesn't like RGB because I fucking I've hated RB RGB on computer peripherals since like 10 years ago. I've never liked it. I've never wanted it.

I don't want rainbows shooting out of my computer. When I go to bed at night, the last thing I want is my computer to- BWAAANWEEE! And I know like, I usually- people are probably like, you turn things off at night? It's like, uh- Even back then I was doing folding at home, So I like to keep my computer running and I like the idea of my computer working when I'm not using it Um, so I often keep it on but I just never never get the RGB stuff. I don't understand it I want my computer to be as quiet and unobtrusive as possible. Just shove it away. Don't have me even know it's there. Like, uh. I have a dream of building like a, like an airtight box in my office that has a, an intake pipe and

an exhaust pipe that pipes air outside, like out the house or out into the, out the window or something to where my computers don't even share the same air as my office because I hate how hot everything gets. And I want like a computer refrigerator cabinet that is like isolating. No, absolutely. You could probably tap into your dryer's exhaust vent because the house does have exhaust vents and you could probably do that. That that's not a bad idea. And I think it could totally be done. Well, so I, this is not my office long-term.

I'm going to be moving to the basement in this house at some point in the year, actually pretty soon. You have a basement in your your house? We do yes. It's currently occupied by our roommates that are living with us but moving out soon but there is a basement in this house but I want to like just exhaust my computer heat out into like the unfinished part of the basement and keep my like office. I have dreams. Dreams Mark. Well get rid of those dreams. Shove them down. I thought you were the host for me. I was like, oh, what's the topic?

But I forgot that's me. I will have a plumbing update, but I might save it for the next episode to give the update. I have plenty more small talk. I'm trying to space it out. Anything else y'all want to cover, need to cover before we jump into the episode. I'm sick.

Can I get pity points? Yeah, you can have points here. It's just a little baby cold. James got a little baby icky I think I spelled baby B. L. E. Y But close enough is Bailey sick if I ask what that is later. It's supposed to be baby Today's episode is something I like to do I don't know if you guys like to do it But I want help because it's hard for me to do this by myself I'm not playing mobile games with you no you're gonna help me masturbate you guys know how I go on

episode title is just is it a circle or a triangle do you remember guys wait do you remember the syndigo sketch where you guys were in robes and use the the unholy circle jerk just a quick cut away There were some that never saw the light of day that I wish to God did there was the dad skit The what the dad skit were like I was wearing short shorts and like weird goggles and like a tight shirt We were like sexy dads that just like looked at the camera did like dad things We were dressed like why didn't that come? I don't know. It never came out. I think that was also the one where you were smoking

a cigarette dressed as an angel or something. Oh right. Oh yeah. I forgot about that. Holy shit. I remember how long it took to get that shot. Cause they were like, there's that spiral staircase and we were all, and then it's in,

it's in that video for like half of a second. Oh, it's such a good cutaway though. My favorite part though was remember when we were in the parking garage at the place where you were living there And we were like screwing around filming around cars and people kept like coming home to their parking garage parking and seeing us In robes like jerking each other off getting in and out of cars just being like I fucking hate this place I hate everyone that lives here. You guys suck I'm pretty sure that's the how to be a youtuber uh sketch with Ross Which for some reason people really didn't like and that's a really funny sketch. I know it's the funniest shit

Yeah, you like fucking checking off on sonic's quills. Yeah Like fucking fucking a donut the more you say this the more i'm convinced. I wasn't a part of this I don't think I was there for that one I think it was before you were in town I like got there and or after before or after you left or something and Ross just came over and just did some funny shit for a while. What's crazy about that is, is people back then, you know, I, I often think, you know, people think today people don't have any context schools about the

internet and people like can't understand when something's a parody and something and I get it's totally confusing now, but back then I thought everyone could understand like that's a skit. that's not who this guy is. It's a bit. It was so good. No, we have to be careful. Everything we say as we've learned on this show is taken very literally by the internet

and we all really fucking hate each other and then we don't and then we do. And then we actually survived a meteor for those ads. Like there was really a meteor, the world ended. Things are taken very literally here. Of all the stuff we've done, I've definitely had some things where I couldn't stop trucking and like it was very funny

and I found it funny while we were doing it. That bit where we're just sitting on the couch and Ross is just talking, is one of the fucking funniest things I've ever had to be on camera for in my entire life. Like literally he just walks in is like, yeah you fucking game grumps, you fucking heard of us? I'm Ross from fucking game grumps. You fucking heard of us. I'm Ross from the Game Grumps.

You are beneath me. But he's just like, he just did that. It was unprompted. I'm pretty sure we just sat down and you were like one of the Cineo guys. Someone was like, all right, so you're teaching us how to be YouTubers and you're be kind of a dick. And then he just did all that shit. And it was like like what the fuck

yeah, I think all he had was a notes of just like one-line ideas of things to talk about like the coming on Sonic's quills That kind of shit, but everything else was completely you like fucking your mom. Yeah Ross is funny. Check out Ross. Robert Ross on Twitch. He's also very talented, very talented artist and like he designs levels and stuff. No, no, no, just funny.

Okay, nevermind. But today, you guys are going to help me write a song. Do you guys know how I like taking songs and like rewording the lyrics to be something else, but it's like the same tune? So I'm not, I'm not creative enough to write my own music, but I can take lyrics and change them. Can we just, can I just throw this out? Cause I, I'm, and I'm not this going to sound accusatory and it's not cause I have an AI open

in front of me right now waiting, ready to go. Cause I didn't know what we were doing. Can we do no AI for the lyrics? I literally, I never do. Yeah. But Mark and I do all the time. Oh no, I'm doomed. Yeah, so let's do this. So I don't even want you guys necessarily have to like write lyrics.

I need help finding ideas because the song I'm working on, you guys know the Billy Joel song, We Didn't Start the Fire, where it goes through the history of like 1949 to 1989. And it's in chronological order where it's like, you know, Bernie gets, children of the little my dude

dude so I started doing this and fallout boy wrote one fallout boy made a sequel we didn't start the fire but it's not in chronological order they just have events kind of splayed all over the place and that upset a lot of people just like well I want to do this like and have us do it I started by myself actually a little while ago can I share this with you all? Probably. I've got a list down here. I wrote down some stuff like, you know, Obama being the first black president was a big deal.

Dale, Dale Arnherts dying, Columbine shooting. They're not all pleasant things, but these are all like the type of stuff that was in like the first song, right? They were like big events or important people or movies that changed the culture and stuff. You know, Read My Lips, which was George Bush, because he said that before 1989 or 1990, I believe believe but the actual tax thing where he betrayed that I believe came out in 1990

So I put that in there. So basically starting 1990 working my way down and this is man. This is This is one of those things where I guess I didn't hear the lyrics I thought it was a happy fun song and I'm sure a lot of people thought it was the same way Let me bring up his lyrics. I've got those too. Yeah, wait, give me a brief for this one. Cause all I, cause I'm, there was a recently people talking about, are you a lyrics listener or are you like a beat listener? I guess I'm just a listening to the beat.

Cause happy, happy, happy, happy. Oh, no, no, no, no. The song just goes through history. And basically the premise is like, there's always been shit that's going on. We didn't start it, but like bad shit happened during our time too but there was already bad shit. Like that's the premise of the song. It's like we didn't start the fire. We tried to fight. We didn't light it. We tried to fight it but we didn't start it. It's always been burning.

So what date range are we? Are we starting in 1989? Is that the thing? I believe so. 1989 I think is when this song came out. So I think 1990 is where we start I've got some stuff here through 1995, but again, this is really rough So like 1994 was whenever oj simpson's trial was where he was found not guilty That was like a big event bill clinton won the presidency back here the Batman animated series So you're looking for just more events to add into this? Anything and everything we can do to like work on a sequel that we're happy with to the song.

So you guys can come up with lyrics. You can tell me that some of these, these are not good. Like these lyrics I wrote were just kind of like filler to move on, but like they're not good. This is the first pass like. Well, I've got more events. Let's start, let's start with like kind of like a brainstorm. I've got more events. Let's start. Let's start with like kind of like a brainstorm I've got some events sure. Okay, so events people big songs shows movies

Anything that like if you were looking at a time capsule of the era you feel like would be worth representing that time period Yeah, let's go Bob. What you got 1990 Nelson Mandela is released from prison in South Africa 91 the Soviet Union is dissolved. End of the Cold War. Cold War says goodbye was a lyric I had. You're missing a big one. 1989, Markiplier is born. Oh, me too, me too.

Oh man, it's too bad we start in 90. Ah, biscuits. Because I was also born in 89, despite looking like the cryptkeeper, because you fucks, but. Should you come out the womb, cryptkeeper I'm like I'm like the Benjamin Button what's the Robin Williams movie where he ages fast that's that's me Jack yeah anyway to continue the 97 Hong Kong is handed over from the UK to China okay I haven't really done 1997 yet I've got I think I had Enron on here when Enron collapsed I had Titanic came out in

1997. That was a big movie, I think at the time. 1999, Euro is introduced as a currency. Do you just want one thing per year? Not necessarily. I feel like the way I've kind of done it is it's almost a line or two per year and then it kind of moves on. But not always. Like some years are more compact than others. It's more so like we have limited numbers of lines to work with here so I just copied and pasted this we don't have to keep the same chorus but like I find the shit fun I don't know if you guys find it fun I don't know if the audience finds it fun I find it really fun to take songs and try to like do them this is the probably the hardest one to do because it's just like he does it so compactly he starts off

it's Harry Truman Doris Day read China Johnny Ray South Pacific Walter Winshell, Joe DiMaggio, Joe McCarthy, Richard Nixon, Suda Baker, television, North Korea, South Korea, Marilyn Monroe. That's like how his first line goes. There's so much in there and he does it with like one word, right? Like a name, North Korea, South Korea. It's like, oh, okay. I know what that means. But there's just so much compact there with like just a name or a word. Whereas, you know, I've had a harder time. So it might have been like McVeigh and OKC, OJ Simpson, not guilty. It's like, does it work? Yes. Is it great? No, it's

rough. But we're only starting from 1990. Yeah, 1990 because he covered basically 1949 ish, I think to 1989. I'm compiling a list. I have more years. So what years do you not have? So I had stuff through 1995, like typed out up here. Again, this is not a final copy. You can see what I've written. It's okay. It doesn't flow off the tongue very well. So it needs editing, but I've got through 1995 and I've got some other events here.

Like I've got 1997's Titanic, 93 was Jurassic Park, 99 Star Wars Episode I. 96? 96 was one of the largest cicada events. That was the last time it happened. It was, wasn't it supposed to happen this year too? Wasn't cicada supposed to annihilate us? There's different broods of cicada. I think what you're referring to is the one that covered like most of the Midwest, right?

There's a 13 year one and a 17 year one. 96 was the last time that it synchronized, so both of those occurred at the same time. So I believe 96 was Cicada apocalypse. I'll put it on here. I don't know if that's a world event or more of like a us event, but I'll put it on there. It's an America event and we're the world.

1996 is when the Port Arthur massacre happened in Tasmania, Australia, which led to very strict gun control laws in Australia. Way on the other end of the spectrum there. 1999, the record for the mile was set at 3 minutes and 43 seconds and.13 and it hasn't been broken since. Do we have anything from 1997 other than the movie Titanic? Princess Diana died in her car crash in 1997. That's a huge one, yeah.

In 2000, you could have something about Gourvy Bush, Dimple Chads, Hanging Chads, election stuff. Ooh, I got a 94 one. Do you want one for 94? Yeah, we can put it on here. Amazon was founded by Jeff Bezos, July 5th, 1994 a book company Stupid come on Jeffrey. You can do it. Come on Jeffrey get him Yeah, so one of the fun things if you listen to Billy Joel's version

He does fun stuff like whenever he does a Billy Holly He introduces Billy Holly, but he does like one of Billy Holly's classic like noises He makes whenever he mentioned psycho it has like the psycho stabbing noise. So he like, he does do things to like reference the material that he's covering sometimes. Like there's an occasional like nod to stuff like that. So you could do something like that. Sure. I feel like I need to copy and paste.

I have one thing for every year and some of them are not so good, but it's a lot of them seem fairly usable. So here's the other thing I was trying to do. I was also trying to mix it up between songs, people, world events, athletes, actors, actresses, stuff like that. So like, I would find a world event for each year, because like there's literally like, you can just go to like a Wikipedia and find like a year,

and then it lists events and stuff like that. But I was also trying to be like, okay, well I wanna do what kind of Billy Joel did and like put also like pop culture things, music things, movie things, theme park things, big news, world news. Like I was trying to find a mixture of things that were representative of that time capsule era. Katrina was in 05.

The iPhone released in 07. That was pretty substantial technological thing. Global financial crisis 2008, a classic. Who could forget that classic classic 2010 deepwater horizon oil spill ah damn. He's got all of them. He's crushing me um Unfathomable damage irreparable harm to the environment imagine 2012 our YouTube careers drunk minecraft Not me well actually that's I guess I was in that. Well, if you want to talk, YouTube was founded in 2005. That is pretty notable.

That led to a lot of this. I love putting YouTube right next to Hurricane Katrina. That's a good combo for the lyrics. Listen, we're brainstorming. No bad ideas. No bad ideas. No, no. I mean, it truly is like that in the song.

They're like, there'll be something like good right next to something bad. 2013, Snowden leaks NSA documents. 2014 Russian annexes Crimea. 2008 Bitcoin was founded. Bitcoin got its start. Oh, Silk Road. Old school crypto back when it was just for buying heroin. The 2019 Notre Dame Cathedral fire. Just national world landmark heritage site. You guys remember anything important that happened in 2020? I feel like that's a real empty one. I've got something written for that year, but nothing too big.

Uh, something about a cold or something. Unisonis! 20! That, wait, listen. 2019, it started! That end of the Unisonis live stream lives in my head rent free forever. 2016 would have been Trump takes over the presidency, right? Yes, Trump elected. I did not know

that this happened. 2023, India officially surpasses China as world's most populous country. I did not hear about that. It's it's I think with India, the issue was it was very difficult to get an idea of just how many people they did have because a lot of the country, you know, wasn't as modernized. There was like a rapid modernization, but it was occurring like in waves going out to the extremities of the country. So it probably passed him a while ago. It's really hard apparently to get a solid metric of how many people there are when there's a billion people. It's kind of hard to count. You just count like a hundred and then estimate, right? What you do is you look at the country, you count how many people are stacked up vertically,

and then you count how many people are stacked up horizontally, and then you multiply it. December 2nd, 2001, SEC begins investigation into Enron. Oh yeah, all of us didn't mention another big event in 2001 that would probably... I thought that was already on the list. I assumed it would be on the list. I didn't look. I did kind of assume that would be on the list. I mean, it should be. I just didn't. I didn't get to the 2000s when I was making this. We have nothing on 2002 or 2004 right now. Oh, I had one for 2002. This

is maybe not that interesting to other people, but I didn't know this. The ICC was established in 2002, the International Criminal Court, which is a place where countries can bring suit against other countries in regards to like acts of war or war crimes or inhumane treatment of people and that's cool. Okay, we're missing 2004, 2006 and 2007. I have a bad one for 2004. There was a tsunami in the Indian Ocean that killed almost a quarter million people. That's something. 04 Facebook launched 2004. I also had Google in 1998. I don't know if you guys brought that one up, but I already had that on here.

So one thing we don't have any time after like 1999 right now is any like big music things or movies, shows. Like Game of Thrones would probably be worth putting on here. That was a pretty big one when it was like in its heyday. 2004, even more important than Facebook is during the halftime Super Bowl, Justin Timberlake and Janet Jackson had a wardrobe malfunction. A wardrobe on purpose, if you ask me.

Yeah, did anyone ever actually reveal, what, it's so long ago now that I don't even remember. Didn't she have like a pasty or something covering her nipple? She had what is described as a nipple shield on, which I don't know exactly what that is. Is that the official term? It looks like a metal pasty. Which makes it seem like it was something possibly planned. Yeah, I don't think you would wear something like that under an outfit that wasn't designed to potentially come off. Oh, 1991, the World Wide Web publicly debuted. Oh, you said that already.

I think I do have it on here. I had to call it World Web I put on here just to try to fit it in lyrically. That's the other hard part is you take all these events and you have to fit it in these lyrics where it's like three or four events per line. Buddy Holly, Ben, her, space monkey, mafia, hula hoops, Castro, Edzel is a no-go, U2, Singmen-ree. Can we use any of those lyrics? Can we steal anything from the original, I mean borrow anything, be inspired by from the source material? Did any of that stuff happen again later? Like I don't know what they all even reference for sure, like California baseball, what happened

in like the 60s that was California baseball? I don't know. They discovered baseball in California? They were digging for gold and they just found baseballs. that was California baseball. I don't know. They discovered baseball in California. They were digging for gold. They just found baseballs. The richest vein of baseballs. So another big one in the last few years was Roe v. Wade being rescinded. That was a big one, I think, because I think Roe v. Wade's in his initial one. Did you actually put like the pandemic for 2020 or? I have COVID marked down for that, yeah. I think we need more like pop culture-y stuff between 2000 and 2024.

You know, Bitcoin, crypto, YouTube, those are kind of pop culture-y. All right, you want pop culture? I got pop culture. 1990, The Simpsons debuts on Fox. 91, Nirvana releases Nevermind. 92, the first McDonald's opens in China. 1994, Friends premieres on NBC

1995 DVDs are released as a format 1999 the Matrix is released 2003 Futurama cancelled 2013 Futurama cancelled 2014 Futurama cancelled 2023 Futurama's back Definitely not gonna be cancelled 2003 2013 2003 2013 2014 Futurama's back! Definitely not gonna be canceled. 2003, 2013? 2003, 2013, 2014. And then it's back in 2023.

I just think throughout the song, you know, having it canceled, canceled again, canceled again, and then like, it's back 2023! Survivor premiered in the year 2000. Survivor's big for a lot of people. That's still going on. There's like 9,000 seasons of Survivor. 2002, Kelly Clarkson becomes the first American Idol. I'll just put Kelly Clarkson because honestly, we could probably just put her name in there and that'd probably be fitting enough. 2008, The Dark Knight is released.

2009, Michael Jackson passed away. That was a very large cultural moment. Is 2008 also the year that Heath Ledger passed away? Yes, I suppose. Yeah. Because he passed away before the movie came out. January of 2008. A Game of Thrones premiered in 2011. You had mentioned maybe that would be a good one. Yeah, we don't have anything for 2011 or 12. In 2012, the Avengers released, which was kind of a milestone in the MCU. Yeah, you'd probably say like Iron Man was probably where that started or you could do

the first Avengers, I suppose. That was also like what 2008, 2009-ish was Iron Man? Iron Man released 2008, May of 2008. Okay, I was trying to find a specific year of when this first came out because I believe Heath Ledger passed away because of sleeping pills, right? What always makes me sad about that is it's only recently that melatonin as like a dietary supplement has been prevalent. I was trying to find when it was first released as a product because it's,

it's, it's as fascinating that sleeping pills were so incredibly dangerous. That's, it was very easy to overdose on them and basically suppress your body's ability to breathe with the way it worked. And now melatonin is available and definitely a safer alternative. So it's just sad to think about. All right. This is making me feel really old. Do you guys remember what year the ALS ice bucket challenge was?

Was super viral. It does not feel like it was that long ago to me. 2013. Okay. Well it's 2014, but yeah, a decade ago was the ice bucket challenge. Can you fucking believe that? It does not feel like a decade ago. God damn guys. We're getting older 2016 DiCaprio finally wins an Oscar. Everyone had been talking about that 2017 Despacito takes the world by storm 2018 Black Panther 2019 was when endgame became the highest grossing film of all time

Okay. Well, this is a good funny one. All right, Woody Woodpecker. In 2020, Tiger King had a moment. That was hilarious. Animal Crossing also came out that year and was like the thing everyone did during the pandemic. Remember when there was talk shows on Animal Crossing because everything was fucking terrible for a while?

Oh, 2021, 2021. Squid Game. Everyone learns about Korean television. No, that's not Korean. Is that Korean? Yes. Yes, Korean. I don't know. I just had like the biggest moment of self-doubt. Which they're still working on the next season of. They're still. It's apparently been a huge, problematic filming process. Like, I'm sure it will be good, and I hope it is.

Everyone remembers Squid Games as like a cultural phenomenon. So many people are gonna watch it without like rewatching the first season or without really being, and just be like, ah, the first season was better. The only thing I have for this year so far, I know there's been a lot of news about nuclear rearmament. Apparently the US is being accused of like,

building up nuclear arsenals and stuff again. Oh, that sounds illegal. I don't think, I don't know. Well, it's the back and forth between like the US is being accused of like building up nuclear arsenals and stuff again. That sounds illegal. I don't think... Well, it's the back and forth between like the US, North Korea, China, Russia. It's like, you know, that whole dynamic of no you, no you. I want to do more fun stuff. I'm pretty sure there's one that's not playing right. I'm pretty sure of that there's one. I mean, I don't disagree with you.

I don't disagree with you. Hey guys, you remember in 2022 when Will Smith slapped the shit out of Chris Rock at the Oscars? That'd be a fun lyric, Will Smith slaps. Can I be honest with you guys? I've still never seen the clip. Oh really? Oh really? I've never seen the clip of the actual slap.

I've seen edits and memes of him slapping literally anything but Chris Rock. It's exactly what it is. The clip itself is mostly just like, oh shit. But yeah, the memes are much funnier to watch for sure. There's nothing particularly notable about the slap other than the fact that like it's on a stage in public and just kind of like that actually happened. Like that wasn't planned. Before people accost me, I've only seen pictures of it, is what I'm trying to say.

Is I've never seen the video itself. I've seen memes of still images, never the actual slap. You know what I will say? It's totally, like if you're at all interested, or if it ever comes up, it is worth watching if you can get a clip that includes a lot of the after. Cause I think the slap is a slap, and it's like shocking Chris Rock's reaction,

and the way he like maintains, like he's still's still hosting right and then he like keeps it professional and he's kind of just like oh okay I think his first line is like oh wow The way Chris Rock deals with it is worth watching because it's pretty funny He's like even he's everyone is shocked and even he's got like holy fuck anyway Ahem ahem Holy fuck! Anyway... Ahem... We have nothing for 2015, we have nothing for 2006 right now. The Force Awakens came out in 2015.

Wait, Harambe, when was... was that 2015? 2016! Oh, Harambe, but you gotta put that down. Yeah, Harambe is quite the moment. Oh, wait, the dress! the blue, the blue or black, the black and blue or white and gold dress thing was 2015. And then the follow-up, the recent court case where those, the people who posted that dress or the guy, they were in court for some reason for abuse, I believe. I can't remember, but that came up again. No, yeah, it was not good things that the person who made that was in was in in trouble

for I did not remember the details either, but he had been accused of doing some bad things. Oh, 2015. Oh, 2015 is also the year that both Jon Stewart and David Letterman retired from their talk shows to two long running shows that I feel like defined a lot of the discussion around pop culture and political stuff for America. Yeah, the Stewart's back now, but yeah. Yeah, but he only hosts like once a week. It's not like it's his show or anything. It's different. He's changed!

No, actually, he's pretty much exactly the same. He's getting older. He did an episode about it. Guys, Sane left One Direction in 2015. Oh, no! We don't have a whole lot of music stuff here either do we just had one direction other than that Okay, there was one thing that happened 2006 Pluto lost its planet status in 2006 Oh snap I was gonna say apparently myspace became the most visited website in the US in 2006

With users and this is a great callback users like Tila tequila and soldier boy gaining great fame on that site Borat came out in 2006. That's kind of a thing. Oh Taylor Swift. We don't have on here snooki. We don't have on here Steve Irwin died in 2006 That's sad. He's worth putting on here man. He'd be for when affected the world That's sad. He's worth putting on here man. He, Steve Irwin affected the world. Justin Timberlake brought Sexy back in 2006. That's great! On Future Sex Love Sounds, the album whose name is hard to read because it's all one word with a slash in it. It's worth putting a lot of different things on it, like the more stuff we have to choose from, the better we can try to cram it in lyrically later. When did Taylor Swift start getting popular? When was her first album released? Does anyone know?

2006. Is that true? Yeah. Good, good remembering, Wade. I knew a secret, Swiftie. Maybe. What other years do we need? Who else did I just say that we didn't have on here? Taylor Swift? I said someone else. Snooki. I said Snooki. Snooki. Yeah. I never watched Jersey Shore. Jersey Shore could be a thing in general. That was 2009. What's the other thing? The the situation? Is that his name? You know, old situation. I think you're right, but I, I, it's really funny. Like if you're not right, they call me the situation. I'm different than that situation, fellow. I'm the situation for copyright purposes. Um, 1992 CD's outsell cassettes for the first time in history. Oh, nice.

1995, Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is opened in Cleveland, Ohio. The heart of rock and roll. 1997, Elton John's remake of Candle in the Wind is released, honoring Princess Diana, comes a best-selling single of all time. There's another one for 2008. It's Blu-ray beat HDVD in 2008, but it's because of porn For I love that as an association with that. I love that for us

1999 Britney Spears debut album, baby one more time releases. Oh Britney Spears is a big one a 2001 the iPod came out. Oh That was yeah the beginning of the resurgence I had a buddy who had the original iPod where it was four buttons and then the circle thing underneath it What a time to be alive man and the beginning of Apple's like resurgence They would not be where they are today without that no longer But we're at one point the most valuable company in the world now I think both Nvidia and no with with with Apple's latest WWDC, Apple came back! They're number two again! Alright! Yippee! Good job everybody! 1997 was Buffy the Vampire

Slayer. That was a big one at that time. 2008, Single Ladies came out. Beyonce. Ooh, okay. Beyonce is... Yeah, she deserves a spot. 2011 Adele's album 21 comes global success, launches her huge career. 2012 Gangnam Style. First YouTube video to reach a billion views. What, you're right. 2010, all I have right now is oil spill. 2017 was the fire festival, guys.

How do we forget that? Oh, right. Man, you're crushing me on this. 2017 was the fire festival guys. How do we forget that? Oh Right, man. How man you're dude. You're crushing me on this. I how many points do I have daddy? Oh, man I've been keeping track diligently definitely not just typing here So lots you've got just lots of points 2019 was when Lil Nas X's Old Town Road broke the record for longest-running number one single on the hot 100 Old Town Road Was 2019? Yeah. 2020 was when Billie Eilish, Billie Eilish, Billie Eilish became the second artist

ever in history to sweep the big four awards at the Grammys, which I don't know 100% what that means, but I assume that's like- I was typing Old Town Road, so I missed the year you just said. 2020, she swept the big four awards at the Grammys, only the second second artist ever in history to do so who's the first and what year was that? Fucking what do you want from me use your own Google bar? I gotta give you harder tasks so mark can catch up. No. No, I'm winning. Oh, all right. Here we go, Wade

I've got you. This is gonna be worth triple. Here's some good in 2001. Shakira won her first Grammy. Ooh. I mean, that's for me. I don't know if that's for the world, but I mean, I'll take it. Okay, Mark, I got Shakira 2001. What else did you have?

That was it. Oh, okay. Okay, got it. It's just worth a lot. I mean, does, if for 2023, does Taylor Swift's Era Tour count as like a cultural thing? That was, it broke Ticketmaster. It's gonna lead to like anti- cultural thing? That was it broke ticket master.

It's going to lead to like anti-monopoly things against. I've got one. I've got one. I've got one. 2015. Open AI was founded in 2015. You know, open AI, the hilariously closed AI company. I got to put Tom Brady on here. Tom Brady has to make it. Patrick Mahomes has to make it right. Why? Why do they have to?

Because Tyler will hate that. Tom Brady is like the- has won more Super Bowls than most franchises will ever win, so like it's pretty nuts. Okay, all right, this guy. When were memes invented? What year can we say that that happened? Because they've been around for a long time. And also, I- that- this is an Unisonus clip, but it's not- it's just Ethan showing. Do you remember the meme thing that Ethan showed you in Unisonus? Where it was like,

what memes used to be like, okay, I'll take this cute picture of a gecko and I'll put some colored background behind it. And then it's like, what memes are now you take a dark hallway, you put some shadow creatures in it and then you put some text that says something like me and the boys at 3 a.m Looking for beans looking for brains Yeah, but that wasn't us. We didn't do that. I got a bunch of show premier years That's not that exciting 98 sex in the city premiered 99 the Sopranos premiered LeBron was drafted in 2003 Lord of the Rings return of the King came out in 2003 won 11 Oscars including best picture 93 the what no way wait The Backstreet Boys were formed in 93. That's a way

Whoa, and sync was formed in 95. No, that would be more in the range I would have guessed why why do you is that do you think that's earlier than you expected or later? I thought they were early 2000s. I could have sworn. The Backstreet Boys, one of their big albums was Millennium. It came out because of the Millennium. I guess I didn't really pay attention. No, no, no. It came out because they were founded in the Millennium. Oh, okay. Got it. Uh-huh. Yes. Get with it.

2014, Frozen and Let It Go takes the world by storm and parents everywhere gouge their eyes out. Yeah, aren't you glad you didn't have a kid then? I, we still watch Frozen anyways, doesn't fucking matter. This dude loves Frozen. He likes the Olaf, the snowman and the reindeer. What's his face? Christoph's reindeer.

What the hell is his name? Sven the reindeer, Sven the reindeer. Sven the reindeer. 2017 is when the best picture at the Oscars, they mistakenly announced it was La La Land and when it was actually Moonlight. Very funny, very funny. Which is like, if it was, what I don't understand is they opened the card and looked at it. It's not like they would have both names on there. Yeah, I'm not sure what names on there. I'm yeah I'm not sure what the format well

I'm sure it was one of those things where the person was just like don't say don't say it don't say La la land don't say it don't say la la land He was doing his warm-up in his head Oh, I have another more serious one for 92. The video of Rodney King getting beat by LAPD officers was released in 1992. It sparked the LA riots and- That's probably an important one to put here. Yeah. That's worth putting on there because that was a big event. Some of the 90s are like the early 90s are represented up here too. So we've got early 90s. So starting from 95. 96, we've got Cicadas and the Port Arthur Massacre.

So 96 is kind of weak right now. 97, we've got Titanic, Princess Diana and Buffy. 98, we've only got Google. 99, we've got Star Wars Episode I, Columbine, and the fastest mile recorded, and Futurama. This is an interesting one. 96, 96, what do you got for 96? Port Arthur Massacre and cicadas.

Here you go, Tamagotchi. Tamagotchi was founded in 96. Ooh. And then 96 was also when Pokemon was founded, weird. Ooh, Pokemon's a big one. Independence Day released in 1996. George R. R. Martin published the first book of the Game of Thrones series for the first book

of the Song of Ice series for the first book of the Song of Ice and Fire actual books. Popular slang included words such as boo-yah, psych, and fly. The Motorola StarTac, the world's first flip phone, 96. The 1996 Olympics in Atlanta featured the world's first gold medal for women's soccer. I can incorporate some of the slang in the 1986, That'd be fun. 97, I've got Titanic, Princess Diana, Buffy, 1998's kind of weak. Like I said, only Google. 2000, all we have is Gore v. Bush. We have a lot for 2001, but 2000 and 1998 are kind of weak. I'm sure that there's some like big stuff that we're just not thinking of that people are just screaming out there. If you're

screaming, let us know. 93, Beanie Babies. have i still have some i've got them all like in a i wish i still had some i could go grab them right now 98 furby oh furby furby 98 in 2000 98 we got a couple more 2000 still weak i'm working on 2000 right now uh 2003 i've got LeBron and Futurama canceled. That's all I got for 03. 2005 we have Katrina and YouTube. 2007 I've only got iPhone released. And in the year 2000 demand for US sperm was on the rise. What? 2000. What website are you looking at?

Just doing some Googles, you know. I don't know if Billy Joel would have sang about sperm, but maybe we should. What website are you looking at? Just doing some Googles, you know? I don't know if Billy Joel would have sang about sperm, but maybe we should. The Internet Underground Music Archive, an alternative music website, gave 10 entrants $5,000 each who named their babies I-U-M-A, Ayuma, and then gave them $5,000 for that. Speaking of music, 99 Napster was founded. Hey, that's a real one I'm finding some weird shit. Ooh American Psycho came out in 2000 I don't know if that's really World of Warcraft came out in 2004. Oh Y2K guys

Oh, yeah, the Millennium right the Millennium. We gotta have Y2K. What year was that? 2000. Need sperm! Demand on the rise. Technology's gonna kill us! More sperm! Gorr V. Bush. Need sperm! Not enough sperm. Deviant Art launched in the year 2000.

Oh, boof. Tiger Woods became the youngest player in history to win a Grand Slam. Boooo. Boooo. Boooo. Uh, the final Peanuts comic strip ever was published in 2000, marking the end of an era for Charles Schulz. The Millennium Bridge opened in London, but closed two days later because it had a resonant frequency that made it fucking terrifying looking and it wobbled back and forth like it was going to explode. That's fun fun mad cow disease was real big in 2000 whoa it's still an issue but it

was very popular in 2000 you guys hear that bird flu is potentially coming back did it did it ever leave no but means like on the rise again or something apparently it's got a much higher mortality rate this time around fucking birds well listen you can't just throw out extremely concerning things like that without expanding upon it. You're going to give people this is what gives people anxiety. In the year 2000, phone ringtones had generated two billion dollars in revenue. You remember when you had to buy ringtones for your phone? Can't you still do that?

I've never bought a ringtone. I mean, you don't have to. You could just have a ringtone on your phone. I actually never did, but I used to like go find midis online and then plug my jank phone into my jank computer and get jank mini ringtones. There was one on my old, you remember Singular? The phone company Singular? Oh yeah, Singular Wireless, baby. Yeah, I remember I had my like victory, do do do do do, like the default ringtone. It was always my, whenever people would call me me to say victory and I was like, yeah

We always had T-mobile growing up. So I grew up with that sound the 2002 was a little bit light 2007 we only have iPhone. Hey, you know what else happened in 2007 Bob Myskins met mark fish box as college roommates That's a big one. The internet was never the same Bob Miskins met Mark Fishbach as college roommates. That's a big one. The internet was never the same. I'll definitely put it on here. Also, Wade was alive probably.

I mean, I graduated high school. What year did we start Distractable? Should that make it? Distractable? Distractable had to have been like 2021 or 2022. Here's a big one. Everyone will remember this. The website, I Can Has Cheeseburger launched in January of 2007. Oh website I Can Has Cheeseburger launched in January of 2007.

Oh, I Can Has Cheeseburger. Who doesn't remember where they were when that happened? Google Maps and Google Street View were launched in 2007. Those are pretty important now. Those are pretty big. Those are big. Aww, this is a big one. The finale of The Price is Right hosted by Bob Barker aired in 2007. Bob Barker

officially retired from the show, replaced by Drew Carey who's still doing it. And recently, I saw this on TikTok, I think recently someone literally guessed $1 off of the showcase showdown and won a double showcase and they won like $84,000 worth of stuff. That's cool. Very hype, very exciting. I feel like if I just think there's gotta be some events that we'll think of in our lives, they're like, man, I can't believe we didn't think of that. Cause like going through this year by year,

you get very like targeted, but like there's gotta be some other big stuff that we're just like, dude, how the fuck? Everyone is on the subreddit right now, commenting all the very important and obvious things that we missed, being very upset about it. Yeah, maybe I call it here and we give the subreddit some time to contribute.

If you guys out there want to, you know, make a thread or a post, like maybe just one and then reply to it. The mods do episode posts. Go to that one. Yeah, yeah, do that and give us some ideas. But also, if you think of fun little lyrics, like if you can think of, you know, actual ways to rewrite or write some of these lines feel free let's make this a group effort that'd be cool can you imagine if we actually wrote this like as a community can you guys make the show for us this is a pain in the ass yeah wait aren't you gonna sing well

I don't know if I'm the one to sing this but what if we actually made a song like collectively like that'd be kind of cool everything's good when you make it by committee well maybe not everything but, I don't know. Has it been done before? Has there been like a community song made like that? I like probably in the world, but I not that I know. I mean, this will be the distractable first. So give us some thoughts if you if we got anything wrong,

like, you know, correct us. Let us know if we got a year wrong or if I mean, I could have gotten stuff wrong too. You can read the stuff I've got here. Probably you can see that. Give us your input. We'll maybe revisit this in a later episode whenever I'm hosting again. But let me wrap this one up

because we've been going for a while and we'll probably do something different next time. But this was fun for me. I enjoy this kind of stuff. I enjoy this kind of brainstorming. I wish we'd gotten to the lyric writing so you guys could just see how annoying the lyric writing is compared to like thinking

of these things or coming up with these things is one thing. Fitting them into a song that has like a somewhat rhyming pattern and organization. Can you share this, if we're gonna actually do this again, can you share this document with us in a way so that I can- Yeah, I have no idea how to do that. So once I end this episode, talk me through that and I'll do that.

It's like, it's, you know how to send an email, right? Just like save, I'll hold your hand through it if you really need that. So how many points did I win by? I just want to know. I'm not saying that I outshied Mark so aggressively that you can tell it's not even close. I don't know if we knew that. Feeling pretty confident right now.

Let me go through the points here. During our small talk portion, Mark, I've got you on here. You've got, uh, no meditate, mad, coffee face, PC Banshee? Yeah. I don't know what it actually says, but I read PC Banshee. Then you've got no, like really mad. Let me go to Bob for the small talk portion Bob I've got didn't say F you tree poachers oh yeah good oh good laugh and Tim good laugh and times Tim Tim Tim is sorry calm is Bailey soda that's what I told you to tell me what it was it It was baby something. Is baby soda? That still doesn't make any sense. So side is baby side.

Anyway, a small talk, Bob, you had nine points, Mark. You had eight points. Bad start for Mark. And then I wrote down Bob. So dot many dot points slightly less points. By telling this at the end, Mark, slightly less points. So? By telling this at the end, Mark, you did get bonus points for Shakira. Oh, that could come in the head into play here. But based on, man, so.mini.points, I think Bob kind of still took this one.

So Bob, you are the winner. I will say it, Mark, we're supposed to document exactly what the points are for. I'm not trying to throw away my own win, but Mark, I do feel like if you think about what the Constitution says, and I know you know it. We do not have to mark every single point down to a T. You guys have not- Yes, that was the whole point. You're supposed to have a justification for every point. You can't just write points and then be like, that's worth 19 points.

I can. I'm the host and I just did. uh I'm just throwing that out there Mark I'm just throwing out there. So many points has more things than Mark as the justification. I I would throw a flag but I am out of flags. If you didn't say that he wouldn't remember. I throw a flag. Do you just really not want to host? Like if you don't want to win you can give them your win. I will allow you to give away your win if you don't want to host. can give them your win I will allow you to give away your win if you don't want to host wait I'm just saying I'm just saying I give you a win you're like Wade what if Mark challenges you because you fucking suck it's like take the fucking win you goddamn peasant thing number one doesn't feel very good when you're the host and someone does

this to you does it thing number two you're the one who won't stop talking about how unfair things are and then you're gonna go ahead and just perpetrate this obvious unfair act against Mark. I'm just trying to maintain decorum in this podcast and keep it cool. I think we got to the end and you very clearly know you had more things you said than Mark and you're like, how much did I win by?

And you know I was typing up this fucking document the whole time, so it's hard to mark every point when I also have to type every single point. So I think we can understand as a goddamn community that I did my best here. I'm not even arguing with you that I deserve to win. I just felt like making a big stink about it because I feel like the last time I hosted,

I was in the exact same position. We were getting along so well. Were we? Was it good? Was it good for you, Wade? I thought we were. I thought this was going well. Well, thanks for letting me win, I guess.

I didn't let you. You kind of just won. Yeah. That feels fair. That feels real fair. I think it should. You know, honestly, I think he doesn't want to host next one that he's trying to get the loss. I have an idea, the best idea, and you'll see it if I host very unfairly. Wait, I think you should just make him the host because he's just one of you. You guys really don't remember this

No, I do we did the whole stuff We have that whole skit together in person where I thought we'd like smooth things over other things were good I think they're fine I'm this is I'm just doing the bit from the other side now and then you're not okay, whatever Fuck you Clearly kicked Mark's ass, so. Ugh. All right, but I'm just saying,

if you wanna give Mark the win, you can. Nah, I'll take it. All right. I don't know, does your protest your winner's speech or do you have like another one you wanna give? Oh, now I have to give a speech? No, you can defer. Mark, give my winner's speech, am I allowed to do that?

If I say no, it'll be against me in the Constitution. If I say yes, it'll be against me in the Constitution. I'm just gonna say, you do whatever you'd like. Bob, Bob, Bob, give you the floor. Say whatever words you'd like. You can honor his request or not. I'm just here, man. I, Robert, whatever my middle name is,

Myskins, close enough, do here solemnly swear that I will uphold the constitution of Distractable as host and will do it fairly and justly. I take this authority that is granted unto me with great somberness and heavy hutzp and lots and lots of OOOOOOOH I am so enamored with myself and I love winning. I have a baby! That's good work. Um, Mark, do you have a loser's speech?

I, Mark Shortfishbach, will do solemnly swear that I will do all that stuff that Bob said that I couldn't be bothered to remember and I made a movie. Okay, I don't know if Mark deferred his speech to you, but I guess he didn't stop you so that's fine. Can I just say Wade being on this side of it? I kind of get why you do this. It's fun. This position is very fun. I just- Why do you think I do it on other people's live streams people people have clued into it Started to anyway But I can find go on other people's live streams or if I'm at some event that I want is this hosting

I play the asshole because it's a fun role to play and also it keeps conversation going it is it is kind of fun I get it I I don't I don't like it still when I'm in the position that you're in right now And you don't look like you like it right now I was just it just kind of came out of left field was kind of like dudes We did this. We gave him some ideas. And I looked around and you were just like, wha bam.

And it was like, oh shit. Yeah, no, I know that feeling because like whenever I did it, there was a protest. What was Mark hosting and I protested in the middle of the episode and then it came back. This was just kind of like the yeah, Bob had more ideas. Bob one and you were like, what did I win? How the boy so it's kind of like just the shock I think I'm in shock no I don't

know so I'm saying I get it it's it's fun I might keep doing that forever I would give you points for that but like we've already over you already won did I though did I really sorry it's too fun congrats of you guys haven't already go check us out Bob at my scream mark and markiplier I'm minion 770 lord minion 777. We have merch at distractable store comm you're right I just I just because I wanted to say store that distractable podcast whatever the hole that used to be my brain always defaults to The old URL so I've got to like stop myself tractable store comm I don't know what's there

Maybe there's a boat or a hot tub. Maybe a shirt. Maybe nothing. I should definitely sell a hot tub I'd be fun. This one go to the hot tub business You won't open a movie theater with us, but you want to go to the hot tub business now there Hey, there's a new hot tub place that just went out of business somewhere Probably that we could find or we just make our own. I don't know why someone else has to die for us to be birthed but it seems to be the way that we go like we could literally just open a theater I don't know why we're like man we really need a theater to die so we can swoop in no no that's not that wasn't the legally binding conclusion that we made I don't require them to die for us to do that but if it happens

it happens I don't remember anything we said about the theater at this point it's gone from my memory just like the constitution just like everything else that we've decided is important and worth keeping track of because one I just don't care And two I don't know none important for me to remember but I'll do my best to uphold it anyway Probably that's it podcast out