Do Go On - 188 - Michael Malloy; The Man Who Wouldn't Die

Episode Date: May 29, 2019

In the 1930's, Michael Malloy somehow survived multiple attempts to kill him. How?! It still doesn't make any sense. But this is a wild story of a group of men being very persistent and very stupid.Support the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: www.patreon.com/DoGoOnPodSubmit a topic idea directly to the hat: http://bit.ly/DoGoOnHat Twitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: [e-mail] out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/References and Further Reading:https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/the-man-who-wouldnt-die-89417903/https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Malloyhttps://allthatsinteresting.com/michael-malloyhttps://ireland-calling.com/mike-malloy/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Melbourne and Canada, we got exciting news for you. And we should also say this is 2026. Jess, what year is it? 2026. Thank God you're here. Right now, I'm in Melbourne doing my show with Serenji Amarna, 630 each night at the Cooper's Inn Hotel, having so much fun. We'd love to see you there.

Canada, we are visiting you in September this year. If you've somehow missed the news, we are heading up Vancouver, Calgary, Montreal, and Toronto for shows. That's going to be so much fun. Tickets for all this stuff, I believe, are online. And I'm here too. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates.

Hello and welcome to another episode of Do Go One. My name is Dave Warnocky and I'm sitting here with Matt Stewart and Jess Perkins. Hello, Dave. This is an outrage. This is an outrage. You're sitting here with Jess Perkins and some old man. Yeah, that's true. Hello, old man.

Oh, hello, Greg. Yeah, he's not on Mike today. It's good to have you in the corner. one of there anyway. Oh, I just high-fived Greg. Yeah, on you, Greg. Greg with three G's. One start, two at the end.

Yeah. Like all good Greg's should. Yeah, yeah. He's actually the inventor of Greg's, the bakery in the UK. Yeah. His full name's, Gary Greg. Greg's his surname. When I met him before, I said, hey, Greg, he said, my father's name was Greg.

You can call me Gary Greg. Wow. Yeah. So I don't know. And still I disrespected him by calling him Greg. Sorry about that, Greg. I disrespected by calling me an old man. I'm so sorry, Greg.

I didn't know your name and I panicked. And so I identified you by your age. Yeah. Anyway, Greg, thanks for sitting in this week, but we will try not to refer to you too much in this episode. I do feel like I'm being watched. Yeah, you are. He's staring right at you.

Yeah. Yeah. I think he's feeling inspired for a new kind of pie. There's something about your hair. Yeah, he's going to call it a cutie pie. Greg, my eyes are up here, please. My eyes are down here. I'm looking at my head.

So this is a show. It's called Do Go On. And on it, we rotate between the three of us, Jess, Perkins, Dave Warnarki. Close enough. And me, Matt. O'Necki. Thank you. And me, Matt Stewart.

And what we do here is one of us researches of the topic through the week, usually being suggested by a listener. And then we bring that report in and tell the other two all about it. This week, Jess Perkins is doing that report. We don't know what the topic is, Dave and I, but Jess is going to get us on the topic with a question. Jess, what is this week's question? This week's question is,

Who was also known by the following nicknames? Multiple, okay. Okay, I know nicknames. That's one of my strong suits. The Juggernaut. Okay, that's Gary Gregg. Mike the durable. Okay.

Iron Mike. Mike Tyson? Or Irish Rasputin. Oh, okay. Mike Tyson? Mike Tyson? Michael Collins I don't know if this is one you would have heard of

Michael so it's an Irish Michael It is a Michael I'll give you that I'm out from all my Michael's Is it Bono? Michael Flatley? It's not Michael Flatley I wish

Have you heard of Michael Malloy No Mickauloy I've heard of Often no this is Malloy Oh Malloy He's often referred to as the man who wouldn't die Or the Irish Respute Yeah.

Or Iron Mike. Or the man who wouldn't die. That is such a badass nickname. It's great. I wonder where he got the Rasputin thing. I wonder if it's because he's got a magic dick. Yeah. Did the Rasputin have a magic dick?

That's all I remember about it. We talked about it on episode 100. God, that was so long ago, though. We were also good about his dick. It was a magic dick and then apparently people, when he died, kept it in a jar. Oh. If you get it in you, you're cured. Yeah, I imagine that.

He would say. Of what? Has I and Mike eaten Rasputin's dick? Look, I will not confirm nor deny. The man who wouldn't die. The man who's still alive. Is he a... Yeah.

What does that make you a... To dick in? If you put a... If you put a... Rasputin's a dick in. Anyway, it felt like there was something there. Hey, not all instincts are good. And that's okay.

I'm here to prove that. This has been suggested a few times in the... hat, which you can, like, there'll be a link in this episode's description, or you can go to our website if you want to put in a suggestion any time. Anyone can do it. Well, these people did. Owen Fitzpatrick, Nittish Bat, Jeremiah Bang. Amazing.

Nittish Bat. Nittish Bat. You skipped over Nittish Bat. Nittish bat is so good. I swear we've spoken to Nittish before. Well, Jeremiah Bang. Bang. Bang.

And also by Marcio, too. Wow, so it's relatively, are they all Irish? I know Owen is, and I'm sorry if... Owen sounded very Irish. It's E-I-O-N, which can either be like Owen or like Ian. Okay. So Owen slash Ian. But we definitely know the pronunciation of Nittish bat.

Yeah. Let's just say that. Yeah, true. So, you know, take one for the team, Owen. Thank you. Or Ian or iron. Or Ian's earring. The year.

It's actually Owen Mike. What? No. Instead of iron. He's Irish. Can I just start? A bit of wordplay there, everyone. Don't worry.

We'll warm up really soon. Can you edit all that stuff out? Jess, please. Don't make it look bad. Absolutely not. I'll make you look worse somehow. So when you're listening, if you're listening to that before and thought, God, that was a mess. That was my editing skills.

Okay. The year was 1932. Oh, a good year. The Great Depression was in full swing. The greatest of years. And life was pretty bleak across the board. Michael Malloy was a regular at Tony Marino's bar, where he'd drink until he passed out.

No one knew much about Michael Malloy, other than that he'd come from Ireland, this is in New York, and that he was originally from County Donegal. He moved to New York, where he worked as a firefighter. Fortunately, he enjoyed a drink a little bit, too much and lost his job due to his unreliability and erratic behavior.

Did you just say fortunately that happened? Unfortunately. Oh my goodness, I was going to say. Fortunately. Yeah, but don't worry, when he was passed out, someone put a winning lottery ticket in his pants, and that would have happened otherwise. All right. No, so he used to work as a firefighter now.

He was unemployed, presumed living on the streets, and nobody really knew anything about him. He had no family or friends. No definitive date of birth. most people guessed he was around 60, but who knows? Right. And he didn't have a job other than occasionally collecting rubbish or sweeping alleyways. One night, Tony Marino was at his speakeasy, speaking to his friends, Francis Pasqua and Daniel Kreisberg.

And Marino confided in his friends, the business was not going well. Despite the fact that a guy drinks until he passes out every night. He was a good customer. That's the thing. Marino was about 27 years old. and he would be lucky to get money from his customers. So tabs were opened but rarely paid. He's not very good at the business.

No, he's not good at business. Make people pay for the drink when they get the drink. Don't open a tab. I'd never thought of that. I've never thought of that. Just opening a tab and bailing on it. I normally thought of charging someone up front. Right.

Yeah. It's a real game changer, to be honest. It was tricky back then. It was all checks and stuff, right? I'll write you a check. Yeah. Now, you'll find out that I don't have any money in my bank next week sometime. Trust me till then.

It's all bootlegged whiskey as well. It's all bootlegged alcohol because prohibitions are happening as well. So they're like underground sort of hidden speakeasies. So it'd be like, you give me this non-genuine liquor. I'll give you this non-genuine money. Yeah. I'll pay you in good wishes. So business isn't going very well for him.

And his friend Pasqua, who was 24, and was an undertaker by trade, said, why don't you take out an insurance policy on Malloy? There was an amazing article from the Smithsonian, and this is a little passage from that. He says, Pasquin knew he'd pulled off such a scheme once before. The year prior, Marino, had befriended a homeless woman named Mabel Carson. He convinced her to take out a $2,000 life insurance policy, naming him as the beneficiary. One cold night, he forced-fed her alcohol, stripped off her clothing, doused the sheets, mattress with ice water and pushed the bed beneath an open window.

Medical examiner listed the cause of death as pneumonia, and Marino collected the money without incident. That is the most horrific thing I've ever. What the hell? What? Can you kill someone that way? Well, yeah, she would have, like, it probably would have been something like pneumonia. Her body would have just shut down.

Wow. And so she was so drunk she didn't know. Yeah. Well, she wasn't conscious to, oh, that's pretty messed up. Yep. I thought he was going to douse her in petrol and said her and that was terrible. Somehow I'm even more shocked. Yeah.

Because it has to look like an accident. Oh. Yeah, that's, whoa, that's full of. Whereas, like, I doubt she would accidentally douse herself in petrol. Oh, no, there's the petrol. Oh, no, there's a cigarette. But if she's just found really cold in bed. And that doesn't burn down the whole building as well.

Yeah. So. I mean, that is, it's kind of ingenious, but also the worst thing I've ever heard. Yeah, and I have a little note here that I said, So we're talking about some very nice people here. Pasca, you dirty dog. Well, that was Marino. Marino did that.

Oh, Marino had done that. Pascal, like, he suggested it to Marino knowing that Marino had gotten away with it once before. Like, he's too much of a wuss to ask people for money for the beers. But he'll just kill people. Yeah. So Marino. I could ask him to close their tab, but. It's probably easy to just kill them.

Why don't I just kill this woman? Why don't I just close the tab? have on her life. Cash in. Open a window, close the tab on her life. Yeah, wow. Wow, that is nice.

When one window opens, something, something, something. One woman dies. Yada, yada, yada. So Marino thought about Pasqua's suggestion. And looking at Malloy, he figured he ain't got much, he ain't got much longer to go anyhow.

The stuff is getting him. Yeah, the stuff being the alcohol that Marino was giving him. So. Fantastic. Three, I guess. Not yet. But that does happen. The third man, who was Daniel Kreisberg, he was 29 years old, he was a gross aide,

he was a father of three, and he thought about the plan, agreed in the hopes of coming into some money for his young family. I'm not really sure what, like basically there's a group of them, and I'm not really sure what much he actually does. But anyway, he was like, yeah, I'll do it because if we get some money out of it, then I can, you know, feed my kids. Jeez, you would be so suss on this guy offering you a drink. What, if you knew?

If Malloy, any of these people around him, would be like, Malo's going, oh, this one's on the house. Oh, what do you got to plan for me, Maloy? No, Maloy's the Marino. You think you're Marino? Oh, Marino. There's too many names. Pony Marino.

Oh, there's going to be more. What? In a couple of resources, I read, they claimed that Michael Malloy signed the insurance papers himself, tricked into signing a form that said he could have unlimited free drinks at Marino's speakeasy. Sign here, I'll give you a puppy. Okay. However, I'm not sure I believe that.

I read this account, which I feel is probably more likely. So Pasqua paid an acquaintance to come with him to meetings with insurance agents. This acquaintance would tell the insurance agents his name was Nicholas Mellery and that he worked as a florist. And Pasquare had a colleague in the funeral biz falsely verify that, yes, this guy's a florist. I've worked with him at funerals. So then that's how they took out insurance policies. But there's a different name, though, too.

Yeah, but they were just going to, like, use the body and be like it's Nicholas. Oh, right. Okay. It's a different time. You could just use other bodies. Oh, yeah, no, that's my mum. But then why make it a name similar? Yeah, that is strange, isn't it?

Yeah. Yeah, that's my dead body. I've died. Yeah, I'm dead. Now, can I have my money? Money, please. Yeah. Yeah, so I won't be coming into school today.

As you can see, I'm dead. So, yeah, that homework will be. not be done. It really was a different time. The Great Depression. Why do they call it that? It sounds amazing. It sounds like opportunities were endless.

It took Pascoe five months, but eventually he got three different life insurance policies, all offering double indemnity, which means double the payout if it's an accident. On this guy, Nicholas Mallory's life. It doesn't exist. Two of the policies were with prudential life insurance company and one was with the Metropolitan Life Insurance Company. So one company insureds the same person twice and both of them don't exist.

Yeah, correct. And they're both set up to double. So there's two of them already. They've doubled it and then they'll double it again if it's an accident. Yeah. Four times of money. They have to pay out four times for one man. Yeah.

The same company. Yeah. One man who doesn't exist. This is a good scam. Yeah, it's pretty good. They thought it through. It would be even better if the body they needed was just like a bunch of potatoes or something. So no one even had to die.

It was just a rug? There he is. There he is. No, don't look at him. Have you ever met him before? You don't know he's not a rug. How dare you. That's him.

He's a rug! And he was the best goddamn rug I ever knew. My living room is so empty right now. And my heart. It's an open casket. It's a rolled up rug. Everyone has to kiss the rug. Kiss the rug.

Pasqua, he also recruited another acquaintance, who was a bartender at Tony Marino's bar, to act as next of kin and beneficiary for this fictional Nicholas Melry. And all he would need to do would be to positively, positively identify the body, falsely positively. Yeah, that's a rug.

it and the money would be theirs. If they pulled off the plan, they would split $3,500, which was about like $66 grand today. So it was a fair bit of money. It's a lot of effort for $66 grand, isn't it? Yeah. Like, you're risking it a lot. A lot.

You're murdering a man. You're murdering a man for a split of $66,000 too. So that's not even their cut. You get a third of that each. Yeah. Oh, my God. Remembering that is the Great Depression. That's also only if there was only three of four.

them. They get more people. So it's now December of the 1932, and a few extra men were added to the group. The press would later call them the murder trust. The people who were added were petty criminals John McNally and Edward Tinier Smith. He had a fake ear, but it was not made of tin. It was made of wax. No idea why anybody called him tin ear, but they did. Okay.

Edward Tinier Smith, and there was also Tough Tony Bastone. and his submissive sidekick, Joseph Maglione. Joseph the carrot-noles Maglione. He was a snowman. So like I touched on before, part of the plan was giving Malloy free drinks. They thought, he's a big drinker. Part of the plan. Molo's like, I never paid you anyway.

Yeah, I've never given you any money, but they're like, take it free. They sort of figured he was a big drinker, he'll just drink himself to death. Easy peasy. I actually, I don't know, that's less nasty than the freezing water one. That's borderline ethical. It's not. It's definitely not. But I think they wanted it to, you know, like, you can certainly drink yourself to death over many decades.

You know, cause so many issues. I think they wanted him to, like, drink himself to dead right now. Like tonight. Can you drink yourself to death tonight? Could you? I bet you can't drink 30 bottles of vodka. Child accepted. Oh, no, I could.

I could. They also giving him, like, high fat meals and cigarettes. I'm really going to go. You can't exercise anymore. Nobody loves you. They're also trying to beat him down. They put multiple old mobile phones in his pockets. Yeah, mate, that radiation, over time,

it's going to lead to some issues, possibly. Come stand near the microwave. I'm putting it on for eight minutes. Don't move. That'll be enough to kill him. So, yeah, they wanted him to just drink himself to death. And that way it would also look like the death was an accident. You know, like it just happened.

It wasn't any. anything suspicious. But do you think that's double indemnity? Do you think that counts as an accident if someone has drank themselves to death over their lifetime? It's not like something, like, you got hit by a car or something fell on your head. It's like over several decades, like you were saying, he drank too much accidentally. Yeah, he didn't know.

You can drink yourself. You can get alcohol poisoning, right? Yeah, that's what I mean. That's what I mean. That Bond Scott went out, isn't it? I think so. Yeah. Choking on your own bomb.

Yeah. That's a real rock star way. In a car. Really? Pretty sure I was sitting. He's in a car. He's sleeping in a car. Oh, that's sad.

So, yeah, they thought, look, we'll give him free drinks. He'll be dead this week. But this went on for weeks and weeks, and Malloy would always turn up the next day to take his seat at the bar and start all over again. This is the week. We've got him. How funny, you know, like cheers where everyone knows your name.

Hey, Norm. Yeah. Oh, fuck. Maloy. You're back in again. Maloy, you're still here. Oh, yes. Still alive.

Give you a cup of methylated spirits last night and it hasn't done the trick. Dave, you are so close. Oh, really? The murder trusts were at a loss. Day after day, Malloy came back into the bar and enjoyed his free drinks. And the trusts were always like huddling around like they're about to play in some sort of big tournament. Yeah, they're like getting a game plan, hyping themselves up. Murder trust!

He'd always, he'd have his drinks, he'd stumble off and he'd be back the next day. Growing increasingly patient, tough tone. suggested someone just shoot Maloy in their head and get it over and done with. That is tough. That is tough. That is tough. Donnie. I got a carrot nose.

But Murphy recommended a more subtle solution. Is that tin ear? Yeah, no. Chopping off an arm. Let him bleed out. No, I don't even remember. Sorry, sorry. Murphy, what did Murphy want?

Murphy said, well, what about if we swap out his whiskey and gin with shots of wood alcohol? Wood alcohol Which is basically methanol So it's like close to 100% proof or whatever Yeah it's used in automotive antifreezes In rocket fuels and as a general solvent So they thought Here we go

Like in drinks containing just 4% Wood alcohol could cause blindness And by 1929 more than 50,000 people Nationwide had died from the effects Of impure alcohol So their plan wasn't just to serve him Like shots tainted with wood oil But straight up wood alcohol

Wood alcohol. This is starting to get a little less ethical. Yeah, they're like, let's just straight up poison him. So Murphy bought some wood alcohol at a local hardware store, took it back to the bar, and Marino served Maloy shots of cheap whiskey to get him feeling good, and then they made the switch. And this guy's just like, keep him coming.

Yeah, I love the idea of cheap whiskey. He's like, oh, I'm king of the world. Don't even have to drink wood or solvent today. Cheap whiskey, holy moly, this is meant to be done. drunk. You got a new cocktail. It's called Rocket Fuel. You're going to love it.

The gang watched on as Malloy down to the drinks. Everyone is like in the whole bar is just staring at this guy. You wouldn't be suss at all that these people are staring at you very intently while you're having a drink. All holding big bottles of valvillane. You know what I mean. They must be. I mean, he must be so pissed all the time. He's not noticing any of this behaviour.

Yeah. He's just like, ah, my boys, it's my mates. My friends. Hey, it's a murder crew. That's a thing. Why do we call ourselves that again? So they're watching him and they're like, here we go. But their enthusiasm didn't last long as he never showed any signs of illness.

In fact, just kept drinking. No. He certainly got drunk, but he did not get dead. Night after night, the scene repeated itself. Oh, this is a little question. from that Smithsonian article. Night after night, the scene repeated itself, with Malloy drinking shots of wood alcohol

as fast as Murphy poured them, until the night he crumpled without warning to the floor. The gang fell silent, staring at the jumbled head a heap by their feet. Pascal knelt by Malloy's body, feeling neck for the pulse, lowering his ear to the mouth. The man's breath was slow and laboured.

He couldn't hear it was his tin ear. They decided to wait, watching the sluggish rise and fall of his chest. Any minute now, finally there was a long, jagged breath. The death rattle, maybe. But then Malloy began to snore. He's just gone to sleep. And then he woke up several hours later and asked for a drink.

All of a sudden everyone's like, they were back of the drawing board. Yeah. He would pan out. And all of a sudden he's standing in the edge of the shot in a dressing gown, brushing his teeth. Hey, fellow, what'd have been up to? Sorry, passed out before. Going to grab a drink? They're all on the house for me now

Just poor moan. Is that cool? Anyone want to drink? Yeah, Valvalim? Anyone in? It's so good. He just started snoring. So they're like, we've got him. He's dead.

He's mad. He's just falling asleep. More deadly poisons were added to Malloy's drinks in an attempt to finally break his immune system. They tried turpentine, horse liniment, and even rat poison. But he still kept coming back. Holy moly. But they put, he drank rat poison. Yeah.

Yeah. That is seriously. Wow. And then they tried raw oysters, which was Pasqua's idea, knowing that Murphy enjoyed seafood. Isn't that, don't you eat oysters raw?

No, but they'd like, they'd soaked them in something like wood alcohol. Rat poison. And then given it to him. Yeah, well, the wood alcohol didn't work. No, they weren't raw. They were like off. Oh, okay.

Okay. But incredibly he's right. system seemed to be able to cope with that as well. Iron guts. At this point... Iron Mike, I get it now. At this point, their murder attempt was costing them money, because between the bar tab, the wood alcohol...

About $66,000. And the monthly insurance premiums that they're paying. Three times. Four, yeah, three. They were running up a fair bit of debt with the plan, and nothing seemed to be working. And he's just having a great time. He's like, this is the best.

I've got some new friends. I think so much for looking after me. I don't know. why but I really appreciate. Now, they're seafood? It's the best. It's a king. I just didn't know you guys were paying so much attention to me.

It's so nice. I mean, you're a grown man could have friends like these. Best birthday ever. I didn't realize this is his birthday issues. This is so cool. It's so lovely. Thank you so much. Shots all round.

They're like, no, we're good. Give me some more rocket fuel. Okay, so Murphy had an idea next. He let a tin of sardines rot for several days, mixed in some shrapnel. What? He's not going to notice that there's nails in these fish. This is pretty crunchy sardines.

Slaughter the concoction between pieces of bread and served Molloy the sandwich. I probably just assumed it was like a whole meal, like a multi-grained bread. Yeah, like you get bits. You're going to get bits in that. Any minute they thought, this medal's going to start slashing through his organs. Instead, Maloy finished the sandwich and asked for another. That was great. That, guys, that was really great.

Rotten sardines. I also read at one point it had like drawing pins in there. He's just eating it. How are you not noticing? It's insane. So then they realised that if they really wanted to kill Malloy, which, oh boy, they did, they'd have to do it a different way.

They had tried poisoning him with everything they could think of, and nothing had worked. And Marino recalled his success with Mabel Carlson and suggested that they ice Malloy down and leave him outside overnight. So that night, they waited for Malloy. to inevitably pass out drunk. They tossed him in the back seat of Pasqua's car,

and they drove in silence to Cretona Park. Out of respect. And dragged the unconscious man through piles of snow. They stripped off his shirt. They dumped bottles of cold water on him, and at no time did he wake up during any of this. So you can only imagine how shit-faced he is. And then Marino and Pasqua left him there in the park to freeze to death.

They go back, they go home, go to bed, sleep easy. And they're like, all right, we did it. The next day, Maloy returned to Marino's bar. No, no. Laughing about waking up in the snow. Guys, I must have been wasted last night. I don't even remember walking through the snow or taking my top off. Exactly.

He had no idea how he'd got there. He's like lying in the snow. The last time they did it on a bed with a window open. Yeah, he's in the snow. No shirt and cold water dumped all over him. so his body is just so cold. They must be thinking about cutting their losses at some point. Surely, but...

Or thinking that he's some sort of spirit or something. Yeah, he's made a deal with the devil. He can't be taken down. If there's one thing they have, though, it's perseverance. This is crazy. So he, Malloy spent the day laughing about it with his bemused friends over drinks. He's like, isn't this fun? Oh, God, I am wild.

I am wacky. What am I like? What am I like? Am I right, fellas? Best friends? Are we all getting matched in terms? Tats, let's do it. So another month had passed and another insurance policy payment was due.

So the murder trust were growing more and more impatient. Someone suggested they just hit him with a car. So they recruited the service of a cab driver friend of theirs. So another person's being cut into the deal. But only for like a one-off payment kind of thing. He's not getting a whole thing. I think they were going to pay him like 160 bucks. His name's listed as two different names in a couple of different sources.

And he has to destroy his cab as well. Yeah, his name's either Harry or Hershey Green. It's definitely green. Let's go with Hershey because it's great. It's great. That feels like a bad deal for him. 160 bucks to kill someone. Yeah.

And ruin your car. Which is your, the way you're doing. You're lively. And if you work for a cab company or whatever, you've got to be like, yeah, I killed a man last night. Yeah. And I don't have a car. Can I borrow a car? It was an accident.

Certainly that's what we'll be telling the insurance company anyway. I've said too much. So you might think that they just. get green to wait outside the speakeasy until Maloy left and then follow him for a bit and hit him. Like that would, to me, that seems... That's what I'm thinking. I'm still assuming that right now. That seems pretty logical. But no, no, that's way too clever.

Apparently what they did was once again let Maloy drink himself until he was very, very drunk. And then they all piled into the cab together with a drunk, Malloy, passed out lying across their legs. And they drove a few blocks and they stopped. And two of them dragged... Maloy down the road. They held him up, kind of like crucifixion style. I was holding him up because he couldn't stand because he was that drunk. So they held him up.

And then Green gunned the edge. And he starts racing towards them. Everyone's braced. From the corner of his eye. All of them are in front of the car. I know. So what? They're going to jump out of the way? I don't know what their plan is. But out of the corner of his eye, Maglione saw a woman turn on a light in her room and he worried that she'd witness the incident. So he, like, called out to stop. So the cab screeches to a halt Everyone's sort of like

Oh man And then they're making sure the coast is clear Once they're like, yep, we're all good She hasn't seen anything She's just turning on a light They prepared for round two She's gone to bed Is it in the same spot?

Yep, they didn't move Oh my God Malloy managed to leap out of the way Not once but twice What? They're holding you up And he jumped out of the way He's like, hey, fellas, why have the odds of this? Twice in the same night, someone's trying to run us over

and be sitting in the middle of the road. Oh, that was lucky. Anyway, should we, yeah, let's continue the conversation. Back in the middle of the road. Anyway. I feel lucky to be a lot. Oh, my God, there's a cab. Quick.

Well, I need to go home. Cab? On the third go, Green, raced at Maloy at 50 miles or 80 kilometers an hour. and he hit him. Molloy bouncing off the hood of the car and falling to the ground. For good measure, Green backed up over him again, just to make sure. This time they'd done it.

The gang was sure. He was definitely dead. But another car was coming, so they fled the scene so that they weren't seen. There were no witnesses. So about a week later, Joseph Murphy, pretending to be the brother of Nicholas Mallory, this fake person, called all the morgues and hospitals in an attempt to locate his missing sibling. but no one had the information. There were no reports of a fatal accident in the newspaper.

And five days after that, when there was still no record of Malloy being dead, Pasca and the rest of the gang were getting so desperate that Pasca was plotting to just kill any other drunk he could and pass him off as his fictional Nicholas Melry. And then, lo and behold, in walks, Malloy. Boy have I got a hell. He's pretty battered and bruised.

I think he'd fractured his skull and some sort of injury to his leg whether it was a fracture or a break or something like that And he was still at the bar a week later It was about four weeks later It was about four weeks later It was a month away by in this whole time Oh my God

And he was so keen to tell his friends About this wild story Oh my I know All he could remember was the taste of whiskey The cold night air A flash of lights And waking up in Fordham Hospital

That's all he can ever remember I know. They're doing this the wrong way. They could make money out of this guy alive. Like, tour him around. Have your best shot. You can run him over to whatever you like. He can't die.

He will not die. Just charge per-ticket tickets. Drinking competitions. I will drink anything. Yeah. I'll just gamble. Anyone put up a bet. They could make way more money using him for good.

But you have to explain to him. How do you know that I can drink methylated spirits and not die? Well. Well. You see. Funny story. Didn't really start out as a conventional friendship. But we like you now.

Yeah, I'm not going to kill you now. We've grown fond of you. Now I just want to make money off you, of your alcoholism. Finally, though, Maloy's luck had to come to an end. Dave, as you would say, all good things, sadly must come to an end, including Molloy's luck. And this long torture of a poor man.

On February 21, 1933, Seven months after the murder trust had first made their plan They once again waited for Malloy to drink himself into an unconscious state They then took him to an apartment building less than a mile away from the speakeasy And this is fucked They put one end of a rubber tube from a gaslight into his mouth Wrapped a towel tightly around his face And then poisoned him with carbon monoxide

This time Maloy did not make a miraculous recovery And he was finally dead He made two miraculous recoverings. A friend of the group, who was a dodgy doctor named Dr. Frank Manzella, filed a fake death certificate stating that this was Nicholas Mallory and that he died of pneumonia. I mean, this murder group now has like half the city in it. Each of them get $3. It's really pointless at this point.

Plus, by the time you're covering the costs of the insurance policies and how much alcohol he's drank and how much the tins of the tins of, the tins of, wood alcohol they had to keep going getting from the hardware store. A new cab. Yeah, a new cab. I often think about that with like criminal stuff

that takes so much time and effort. It's like, great, you've got dedication. Just use that dedication for something legal and you'll go really far. Yeah. It's so much time and effort. For something legal. Yeah.

Like if you were just, and you're not murdering a man. Yeah, but there's like, take that tenacity and apply it. Wedding planning. Somewhere else. Yes, exactly. You'd be great. You're a real planner, attention to detail. Exactly.

You know what they can and can't drink? For example, oysters. It doesn't even have to be specifically weddings. Just events. Yes, event planning. Event planning. This is a man who has grown up in the Aflnese who believes everyone's got an equal shot. Do you think these people in the Great Depression could just start a wedding planning company?

Event planning, please. Oh, sorry, event planning. Yes. Oh, yeah, of course, yes. Thank you. Certainly. Sorry, I missed that time. People have to plan their great depressed event.

Not everyone was depressed I'm sure the mega wealthy was still okay Do you think the Great Gatsby organized his own stuff? He had an event planner Oh my God Are you kidding? His lavish parties They were so lavish

Exactly Of course he must have had a planner A staff in fact He would have had several planners The themes to his parties Yeah they were often like 1920s theme Yeah so fun Yeah I love that

I love that I love like the frilly skirts. Flappers. Flappers. They flappers? Flapper dress, yes. They're fun. And you wear a little like a headband.

Yeah. It keeps your hair in a weirdly flat place. Yeah, so good. Well, you know, and then Poirot, the old David. Dave, are you familiar with the David Soucher version of Poirot? No, I'm more of a John Malkovich fan. Okay. But David Souchet, yes.

His assistant in their first few seasons, we had that weird hairstyle where the fringinging Mislemon. Miss Leman. Look, and on. I'm like, what are you doing here, Miss Lema? When was this a thing? Yeah. She looks great.

Circles of hair on your forehead. Hate it, not a fan. I want to go back. If I had a tire machine, that's where I'd go back and I'd say, stop it. Stop it with that hair. Would I kill baby Hitler? No. I would go to the hairdressing salons of the 1920s.

And say, ladies, enough. Shave it off. Get rid of it. You look ridiculous. Jump back in the Dolorian and, you know, the history's changed. Shave some heads. Hitler probably never became, you know, the guy was

if I'd change that little bit at the 19-20s. Yeah, you're right, butterfly flaps at wings, etc. Yeah. Think about that. Flappers. Yeah, butterfly flippers. Is that where that term comes from? Yes.

Yes, Dave. They made... Read a book. I know. Sometimes I don't connect obvious things. You're the smart one. Well, yeah. Well, you play the role of the smart one.

We lived in the curtain bit here, but it's actually Jess and I. We are mega-smart. Yeah, you're controlling me. I'm a puppet. I'm a puppet man You're a puppet-sized puppet How convenient They said do you want it like man size

Or is it absolutely not No that'd be suspicious It must be puppet-sized Could we get it in the size of a boy Do you want it to be like a big strong boy? No no no no What have you got in puppet size Oh puppet-sized puppet?

We want a weak little boy I want to be able to put my thumb an index finger around his bicep, tiny little boy. Then we also had to develop different voices because that's how we talk by naturally. On Mike, we talk like this. Like this. Honestly, I hate it. Yeah, it's gross.

I hate it. I hate it. But, you know, it's all part of the brand. Yeah. But I do miss my authentic self. Yes. Me too. No, no, no.

Me too. I've lost my now. Sometimes I get so lost in the character. Get lost in the Caribbean. I lose me. No, no, no. Dave, please don't project onto me. The puppets projecting back onto its master.

Ha, ha, you admit it I'm your master. Master, master. Clean the floors, Dave. Yes, sir. Okay, so now, this is a relatively short report because it's a pretty fantastic story. I like, I mean, two people have been tragically killed, but I love it so much.

Yeah, it's so wild. Now it was time. to claim their cash. They've finally actually killed Malloy. Now they've got to get their money. They get their three-fitty each. They only got $800 from the Metropolitan Life Insurance Company. They're hoping for about two and a half, was it?

I think so. No, three hundred. Sorry, it was going to be three grand in total. So let's say on average a grand from each. Okay. So they get 800 bucks. And that was they said, oh, it's because you've clearly killed this person who is not the person you've said it is.

Yeah. We'll give you $800. How's that? We love a body's a body. What do you do with the body at your insurance company? Finger to the mouth. With chloroform. Apparently Murphy and Marino each spent their share on a new suit.

All they had to do to get a new suit was killer guy. Oh my God, over seven weeks. Why not steal a suit? Seven months. Seven months, they paid... For a suit. They paid insurance premiums. They paid for wood alcohol.

Marino runs a bar. His bar lost money instead of putting that money back into his bar. He hasn't fucking charged anyone. He bought a suit. So they're incredibly intelligent people. But now I look great whilst I'm getting ripped off by my customers. Pasqua arrived at the prudential office, confident he'd collect the money from the other two policies.

But the agent, Spanner in the world. said, well, when can I see the body? And Pascal was like, oh, it's already been buried. And that caused some suspicion. And the insurance company alerted the police. And in May of 1933, Malloy's body was exhumed for investigation. It was found that he had not died of pneumonia. Green, who was the cab driver we remember, was not happy with his cut.

He started talking. And so I assumed back then they just had no way of finding out. Like they hadn't sought this through at all. Like just looking at the body, they were able to find out it wasn't how he died. Oh my God. They were a little naive. I was so naive. Just steal a suit.

Steal a suit. Steal money. Like, yeah, you've got months. Use that months of planning to plan one night of a suit shop heist. Not even. Do you know what? Spend that amount of time. Just trying to improve your business.

You know what I mean? My main thing here is, why didn't they? just put him on the street and run him over? They tried that. Why do they hold him up, though? Yeah, it is weird. He could have just been like, oh, I'm a cab driver. I came around the corner. I didn't see him because he's a drunk guy passed out on the street. That's an accident. Well, I still don't think green is going to be like, oh, officer, I accidentally hit him. You'd like hit and run. Not that I'm saying that's a good thing

to do. Oh, my God. I'm saying some true colors here. Hit him and run. So anyway, green starts talking. Oh, old Herschel Green. Hershey glass lips. Police discovered that a homeless woman had dieted Marino speak easy under suspicious circumstances and that Marino was the sole beneficiary of her life insurance policy. That is weird.

Weird. So not only of these... They've absolutely cooked this bad plan, but it's also uncovered his last bit of dodginess. Yeah. Silly boys. Then I read, and I don't have much detail. Also, this story, obviously, is from a very long time ago.

And there's a few sort of articles written about it, but not a heap of information. It just said that on a separate matter, tough Tony was shot dead. And Joseph Maglione, his sidekick, was charged with his murder. I don't know if he actually shot him or if he was just falsely charged. Don't know. It would be funny if that one was a genuine accident. Yeah. Yeah.

I was just showing him how my gun works. Look at this. It goes bang. Oh, no. Not again. I'm losing all my friends. Not again. I just want to impress them with my...

Not again. Not again. Always funny. I'm just going to make a call. I love that. That's a good bit. Carry the one. These are all the best bits.

Use them in any scenario. Any scenario. They're all funny. Any. Read a book. Read a book. Before long, there was enough evidence to arrest the remaining murder trust. Frank Pasqua, Tony Marino,

Daniel Kreisberg, who we haven't heard much of, but he was there the whole time. Joseph Murphy all appeared at the Bronx County Courthouse. First, they tried to plead insanity. All of them. But when that didn't work, they tried to implicate each other in the murder. I'm either insane or they did it. Yeah, I'm crazy.

No, you're not. Okay, it was him. Yeah, he did it. Then that didn't really work either. So then they tried to accuse Bastone, the guy who had died. that's where they should have started. Of Malloy's murder. They're like, the guy you can't question.

Yeah. It was him. Why didn't we say that first? Yeah, we should have said that before I said, I was cooking. Because I'm insane, that's why. I'm insane. What am I like. What am I like.

It didn't work. And in June and July of the following year, 1934, Pasquare, Marino, Kreisberg and Murphy were executed by the electric chair at Sing Sing Prison. Harry Green, the cab drive, was the only member of the murder trust to escape execution and was instead sent to prison. Right. So how many people were executed then?

A lot. It's quite a body count on this episode. For Pascoe, Marino, Kreisberg and Murphy were all. All electric chair. And then Big John got shot. Tough Tony was already dead. I don't know what happened to Magdalene actually. Harry Green went to prison.

Right. You'd never get in a business with a group of people who were willing to kill for a small amount of money or any amount of money, right? As soon as it happens, I don't think they're the most trustworthy people, especially when you open up to a huge group. Yeah. I'd say the moral of this story is, try not to kill people, please. That is a good moral, yes.

Had you seen that? Read him between the lines. I reckon it's in there somewhere. Try not to kill. Yeah. Also trust no one. Oh. Thou shall not kill.

Thou shall not trust. Yeah. People called Bad Tony. Perfect. But yeah, it was kind of a pretty. memorable, obviously, case because he survived at least five attempts on his life

before they finally got him. But that is my story about Mike the durable, or I and Mike. The durable. It's such an understated I know. Irish Rasputin. What's the Rasputin thing? I don't know. I actually don't. I know, Rasputin, the story goes that he wouldn't die. Right.

Right. Yeah. shot him and then stabbed him. I remember the part about his dick. Yeah, right. No, they shot him and stabbed him and threw him in the ice. Oh, right, okay. Yeah. And also, I think also poisoned him as well.

He also, they'd been fed. Shrapnel? Arsenic or something like that everyone would die. And he was like, yep. Yeah, delicious anymore. And then, yeah. I just, yeah, I feel like they really missed a trick by not using him as a, yeah, just as a Kearny sort of show guy.

I think there was. There was something about it. Like, the case was one of the very first cases to be investigated by the New York City Medical Examiners Office. Like, it had just been founded. Right. And so then it sort of like, it was a historical case anyway. So it was unlucky for the murder syndicate, really.

That is unlucky. Yeah. Yeah. It was a bad time to be. God, if he died six months earlier like they wanted, probably would have got away with it, too. If it wasn't really pesky examiner. Just fucking do. the first time.

Yeah, anyway, it's funny because I had this written down a little while ago as a topic that might be good for a mini report. And then I started researching, I was like, there's definitely enough for a full report. It was actually a fairly short report there. It's good to have short report sometimes. There wasn't heaps. There's not heaps and heaps and heaps of information

and nothing that you can really verify a lot. But if you want to read it, there's a very good article, the Smithsonian, which I reference, it's probably my main reference for this one because it sort of had the most information. But anyway, that is the wild story, Michael Malloy. I'm so glad you brought it to the group because I'd never heard of it and I love it. So fun.

The man who wouldn't die. I really wish he just kept living. I know. I'm sad he did die. I thought it was all over when he got hit by the car, though. Yeah. And I wanted you to think that. I wanted you to think that.

Did well. Four weeks later walking in. It will not believe. Because we've all got that friend, especially when we're younger, we've all got that friend who always has crazy stories from, like, the weekend. They come into work and they're like, oh, God, did this. And you're always like, you're so crazy. But in this case, they're like, for fuck's sake, Mike, please just die.

It walks back in, none of you visited me in a hospital. Yeah. You got supposed to be my friends. You would not believe the month I've had. I told you everything about me. I told you I'm approximately 60. I told you I love seafood. Oh, yeah, I forgot it was 60.

Well, yeah, they think. But also, like, he's also been living pretty much at Adelon Street. Like, he's been homeless for quite a while and is a big, big drinker. So he could be younger and he just has not aged well. He's 32 years old. Just built up a real resistance. Yeah, it seems that way. Wow.

But maybe, like, too much. But yeah, anyway, isn't that crazy? Crazy cool. Love it. Did you have fun? That's so much fun. That's all I want. That's what it's all about.

That's all I want. Well, that brings us to the segment of the show that the people love. The people want, the people need. I need it. The main event, if you will. Yes. Now that we've got the entree out of the way. It is time for the fact quote or question.

Now, Matt, this comes from a Patreon supporter. And if people want to support the show on Patreon, where do they go? They go to patreon.com slash do go on pod. And... Damn, right. And in exchange for supporting the show, if you want to keep us rock and rolling, you can go there and get a couple of bonus episodes every month

that no one else hears, access to ticket pre-sales. We've got a Facebook group and stuff that no one else is involved with. We'll give you a shout-out, which we'll do in a couple of minutes, but also one of the Sydney-Shineberg, rest in peace, deluxe package tier members, gets to submit a fact, a quote, or a question, and give themselves a nickname that Matt reads out. And this week, the fact of the quote or the question, it's a fact, comes from

Johannes, Johann, I'd say. What an O with an umlaid on top? O, oh, or Uwool? Maybe. Johann Uwool. I love that. And he's given us this fact.

And like I'd say most weeks, I'm reading it for the first time. So be patient, please. He says, I had a hard time coming up with a fun fact for you guys. So I decided to Bing Google and then Google the wall. word fact. Instead of finding an actual fun or interesting fact, I chose the Wikipedia page

about fact as my fact. So this is a fact about fact. Yes. And he quotes, I guess there's a quote from Wikipedia. A fact is a thing that is known to be consistent with objective reality and can be proven to be true with evidence. For example, this sentence contains words is a linguistic fact and the sun is a star is a cosmological fact. Further, Abraham Lincoln was the 16th president of the United States and Abraham Lincoln was assassinated are also both facts of the historical type. This is like, there's a lot of many facts in this fact. Yeah.

It might be a little bit like cheating for my part since it technically includes several facts, but I just thought it was funny how they kept mentioning more examples as if it wasn't clear enough what a fact actually is. If you deem this message to be too long to read out, then just choose one of the facts mentioned above. I believe they're all fine facts. They're fine. As a title, I would like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, since that is probably my favourite title. It's a great, good film. I haven't seen it in ages, but I loved it at the Yeah, likewise. It is a good film.

Good film. I wonder if it holds up. Let's rewatch it. Let's do it. Let's do it. Let's get out the bean bags and I'm matching PJs. Yes. I'm going to make a hot cocoa.

That sounds so good. I love that idea. I love marshmallows. Me too. Why you still have marshmallows? I haven't had marshmallows a long time. I was trying to play along, but I... Should we try marshmallows again or should we just let them go?

I hope you think so. Do you like them cooked or do you like them on a row? It's got to be roasted on a row. Yeah, they are better roasted. But I used to just eat them raw. Oh, yeah. That was someone fun about being like you toast the skin and then pull off the skin. Yes, and there's not kind of gooey inside.

Bill on a stick. And then go again. A bush stick from somewhere. Yeah, you just keep burning that goo. Slowly creating a coating of goo. I think lathering your body in it. And then jumping in the fire. And then going to school.

Yes. Good morning. And the other thing we like to do with patrons, if people who have supported us on Patreon, dot com slash de Gaon pod is we'll thank some of our supporters each episode. We will do that. We do it every time. We normally do it with a bit of a game. A little bit of a fun game that we play.

Jess comes up with some sort of a game. I always call it a game. It's not at all a game. What is it? Just a bit. It's a bit. It's a bit of the show. Should we name their gang?

Okay. You know how they were the murder trust, but they don't have to be murderers. We can tell them what their, like, philosophy is. That's great. But their gang of friends, what, they called? I love that. I love that so much.

Do you? Yeah. And kicking off. Oh, no. What does this mean? What have you done? All right, let me Google what this address is. Oh, no.

I've looked ahead and there's actually some incredible ones this week. Oh, no. What have we done here? Oh, no. Oh. I see Gothenburg and Sweden But obviously that's not how

Swedish people say it It looks at Gutenborg Svurg Svourage Is that how Is that Sweden Do Swedish people call Sweden's

Sferidge? Sferidge I didn't know that Gutenberg Svieterich Svdurge Svurge Svurge Well I apologise for all of that

And who are you actually thanking apart from the whole country. Obviously, we love the sport of the Swedes. Mikhail Medin or Mikhail Medin or Michael Medin? How would you, can you say that? How would you say that? I think you definitely nailed it at one of the three. All right, thank you so much, Michael, Michael.

It's so cool. This one's in Gothenburg, Sweden. That's sick. That's awesome. So you got got got got got got there. What's the gang? Is it a gang of emo gang? Yeah.

The emo emu. They're all Just is not into it at all Dave's not into it either That was not good Emus are an Australian animal Come on Yeah but this is

Do you say emu or emu Definitely It's American say emu But what do they know No There's about emus No Don't bring up the mayor

thing again No Because I think I was proven correct In that one No but And I will I'll say this again You weren't saying it

in an American way You were saying like John Mayer. Mayor. You were going, you know, mayor, as they would say. But you were again, you're arguing with all the Americans who messaged in saying, yeah, Matt was right. They're the ones you're arguing with now. Americans. You're telling Americans how they're pronounce words.

Yeah, we say it like mayor. And you were going, Mayor. Mayor. You said everyone says mayor. And I said, no, that is not right. No, not everyone says mayor. I'll admit defeat there. But you were also saying it incorrectly.

Mayer. Well, no, the point is a lot of people said a lot of different ways. One of the ways some people say it is incorrect. Mayor. Yes. Mayor. Please to meet you, Maya. Now, I feel like this, we've overshadowed the thank you to Michael Medin from Gothenburg, Sweden.

I think that we should say he is part of the Batman Boys. That is so much worse than emo emu-emus. That's terrible. That's bad. I'm going with Batman Boys. Batman Boys. Thank you so much. What are you talking about? You've really lost. Matt, you can have another go with the next one.

I think, again, people are going to back me up on Twitter. And they probably will, and that's fine. They're right? Yeah, but once again, I should probably remind them that this comes out a few days after we've recorded. And as soon as I leave this room, I've forgotten everything. So I'll have no idea what you're talking about. I'll know what you're talking about. They get around.

So at Matt, I don't. Vote one Batman Boys. They get around in Gothenburg City wearing leather jackets. with emo emus on the back. It's sick. You're right. We didn't hear Sandy there and we should have because we're a team. Emoemos.

That's just another example. I'm literally trying to do it right now. Another example of being let down by my so-called friends. I'm backing you right now. I'd also love to thank. Matt, I'm not backing you. Unbelievable. Where is this place?

Yeah, there's a few amazing places. I'm guessing this is Finland. This is Finland. Wow, from Lati in Finland. I'd love to thank Henri Strong. Henry Strandman Omri Strondman Strandman

Henry Strandman And his gang Is Finland the land of a thousand lakes Or 10,000 lakes? Lots of lakes do they? Yeah, like I've got I think 10,000 is actually an underrest I think it's actually tens of thousands

Okay, I've got it Then his group of friends are the Lakers Lakers That is cool! That's cool I'm cool with that I hate it. I think we should do something else because I'm a mean person.

I backed you. I'm a big mean. You did not back me. Rewrite history. Mean people. Okay. All right, man. I can't believe I came here today feeling good about myself. You never feel good about yourself.

You feel like an email. That's your mistake. Yeah. So the Lakers. Yeah, that's great. Good one. All right. Thank you so much, Henri.

Yeah, good one. Yeah, good one. Good one. Dave, do you want to thank some people? Yes, I would love to thank next. We are moving across the countries here. Well, we moved east and now we're going back west. From Trondheim in Norway now.

Oh, great. Well, we have landed all in the same area. Can we just say we thank the people in order of their pledges? So I don't know if that week in that part of Europe we suddenly took off or something. Yeah. But thank you so much from Trondheim in Norway. Alexandra Simonson or Samonson. Alexander Simonson from Trondheim, Norway.

Dave, we've both thought of something. You came up with the terrible Batman Boys. Yuck. The worst so far, I'd say. See if you can redeem yourself. I came up with the Lakers. That was fucking sick. That was really great.

Thank you so much. When I think of Norway, I think of playwright Henrik Ibson. So Henrik's heart throbs. Oh, actually, I don't know. I don't hate it. You're on board with that? Matt, what do you think? I mean, feel free to have a crack at me here.

I think it's fine. One of my favorite songs from a couple of years ago was Bergen to Trondheim by Sun Kill Moon. What did you say? Can we merge the two together? Henrik's heart throbs. Oh, no, that's great. That's a dance, too. You're sure.

It's a really good story, but it is interesting. I'd never. Thank you so much. I never. I appreciate you being genuinely nice. I quite, I did not. I knew that song, and I know, He wrote it, I think, on a journey between these two cities,

but I never knew that that was where that was. So it's in Norway, Trondheim. That's cool. That is pretty cool. Very, very cool. Thanks so much, Alexandra. I've never been to any of the Scandinavian country. I haven't been in that area at all.

I love to. I've been to Sweden and they are as beautiful as everyone says they are. Yeah, I bet. I've got to get there someday. My cousin Finn, when he was about, oh, he was only like five. or something. He was very little. And they went to Finnland

and he just had the best time because he was like, it's my land! He just walked around like, my name's Finn! That's me! And he was so cute. The closest I've been

is seeing children of Bodom laugh in Melbourne. They were like a Finnish metal band. Very silly, fun band. Very long hair. Yeah, and a lot of long key keyboard solos. Love that.

Real fast key solos. Love a key solo. All right. Thank you now to still, it's honestly still impressive that you are listening in New Haven, East Sussex. In England, I'd like to thank Peter Denia. Peter Denia. Yeah, I like that. Sounds like a, like you're replying to something.

Peter Denia. Oh, okay, yeah, I like that. Great to meet you, Peter Denia. Peter Denia. All right, Peter Denia. Peter Denia now. Oh, Peter Dania. That's what it sounds like.

So some sort of maybe like the line. Rafiki's somethings. Ah, Rafikis Ruffigans. I like it. Rafiki's Ruffigans. Matt does it again. Wow. Jess is really trying to win you back here.

Yeah, it's got into patronising sort of levels. You're not letting it back into your heart. I cannot win. Peter Dania. You know what you did. Refikis. Ruffigans. Ruffigans.

Thank you so much. That is good stuff. Hey, can I thank some people, please? Take us home. I'd like to thank also from Great Britain, Andy Conduette Turner. Conduette. ACT. Oh, the Capitals.

The Capitals. That's good. Now, Andy, the Australian Capital Territory is Canberra. And so we sometimes just call it ACT. And I just wanted to clarify, because you're in Great Britain, you might be like, why you call me the Capitals? That's why. And you know who does it? work up in the gals, what are the clowns up there?

Clowns up in Canberra. Where's the comedy? I thought the comedy festival was over. But yeah, up there in Gambra, you know. The capital clowns. Capital clowns. The other symbol is definitely a laughing clown. But like a scary looking clown. Yeah.

Like a bad clown. Like a clown who definitely knows where drugs are. And holding a what of money. Yeah, money and then a baseball bat in the other hand. Well, three-handed clown. I don't know they got money in one and baseball in the other. And the other one, and his third hand's given the finger. Okay, well, he's got three, then he has to have four.

So the fourth one's holding drugs. Okay. Just some sort of size. Or a cigarette at least. Yeah. You know? Of drugs. A cigarette, a drug cigarette type paraphernalia.

Speaking of a drug cigarette type paraphernalia, I was at the airport yesterday morning, very early, about seven o'clock in the morning. Too early. Too early. I swear to God, when I was in the bathroom, I looked over and someone was washing a bong. Amazing. Washing out a bomb inside the air. Well, yeah. You're not going to put that in your checked back.

bag are you, it'll get wrecked. No, we've gone through security. So it's obviously been come up through the, being scanned. They've seen a bong gone, no worries. Now he's washing it out in the toilet. My bag got pulled up. It's not legal, right? Yeah, but it just seemed like a strange place to wash your bong.

My bag got pulled up the other day because I had tweezers in there. And did they throw them out? No. But they just, two pairs of tweezers had gotten tangled, so it looked a bit odd. And they're like, we've got to go through this whole bag. Tweezer Kings. I was like, you get tangled. You guys need to calm your farm.

Anyway, so thank you. and finally, bringing things a little closer to home from Christchurch in New Zealand just across the pond, I would like to thank Sam Philip. You were talking before Jess about wanting to get a dog and naming it Sam. Yeah. So maybe there's some sort of a dog. Dogs of war or something.

The war dogs. War dogs. Warthogs. Warthogs. They've done it again. Sam Philip. Warthogs. And the ward hogs.

Remember? Oh, Sam Philip and the wardhogs. You're also a bad. You're a front man. Yeah. You're welcome. Love that. Thank you, Sam.

Thank you to everyone for supporting us. That's amazing. All six, none from Australia then. Yeah. Wow. Three from countries we rarely thank. So good to thank all of you. Very, very cool.

Very, very cool. And is it all of you? That would be great. Do you have three couches? If so, why? Why? In 25 words are less, tell us why. Why have you on so many couches?

That's crazy. I've got one. Can we just sit on a spare bed? Yeah, it's the first bed. We've got many beds. But you asked for couches. So we bought them. So we bought through a couch.

I own a chalet. I have many rooms available for you, but you asked for couch. You may sleep in the foyer. I don't know what accent I'm doing there, so it can't be effective. Well, it's a mix of all six of those accents we talk about. Brilliant. God, you're good. I am the best actor in the world.

Thank you. And thanks for everyone that supports the show. If you want to be one of those legends, you can go to patreon.com slash do go on pod right now. Right now. Do it. Do it. There's a heap of different rewards,

including bonus episodes. You get two per month as well as a chance to vote on topics. Oh, I forgot that one. Yes. Yeah, you change the history of the show. So two out of three, the topics are voted on by Patreon's. Even though anyone can suggest them. So if you are a listener, you're not a Patreon, you can still suggest topics in the link below in the description.

You also get shoutouts, obviously, on this podcast and also on a book sheet, Dave's podcast about books where he reads the classic novels so you don't have to. That's right. Check it out. Latest episode, what's the one? I did The Tempest, Shakespeare's magical play. Lots of magic going on in that one. And my guests were Nick Mason from the Weekly Planet and Sam Loy from Human Ordinary. Great podcasts.

And also primates is my podcast about primates. It's a popular culture. And last week, and I did the original Aladdin with the guys from the Total Reboot slash Mike Check podcasts, Alexi and Cam. And next week, or tomorrow even, I'm going to do the brand new Aladdin. So see how it stacks up against the old one. Oh, fantastic. Yeah. See how Will Smith comes up against Robin Williams.

It's a tough battle, I tell you. Yeah. But I've heard good things. I haven't seen yet. I'm going to see it over the next. well by tomorrow I guess 10,000 years will give you such a crick in the neck

Yeah it's a good bit Why don't they bring that bit back Bring the bit back So I talked all about that Robin Williams' performance last week And how he ad libbed most of it Seriously? Wow, what a guy

He was probably an absolute nightmare to work with That would be really hard He is a lot And other rewards including You got a weekly newsletter are usually and access into a Facebook group. So we're always there hanging around chatting. But other ways you can get in contact with us

is go into the email address, which is Do Go OnPod at gmail.com or our website Do Go OnPod.com. And that's got links to everything. Everything. Including our YouTube channel, which is YouTube.com slash do go on pod. And there's all episodes are up there, including live episodes. And most of those have been videoed with a video camera. So you can see it's moving.

We've got the cam quarter out. Yeah. You can see what our faces do. The pictures are coming to life. Yeah. Like some sort of magic. I still think it's, you know, magic. How do they do it?

How do they do it? I don't know. I don't get a little. That's the science point of it. Anyway, we'll be back next week with a brand new episode with me doing the report. I'm really looking forward. It's a great topic. I'm already head deep in.

Head deep. Head deep. Did you dive in or? Yeah, like an emu. Like an emo emo emu. An emo emu trying to drown themselves. In a topic. Yes.

And it is very interesting. What is it? I'm willing to say. Dill he got him. You were thought about it. It's crime related. That's all I can say. Anyway.

I say more. Said too much. It's about humans. I know. On the wrong side of the law. Whoa. And we'll see you next week. Yeah.

But until then, we'll wrap it up and say goodbye. Later's. Bye. Got it. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. I mean, if you want, it's up to you. Don't forget to sign up to our tour mailing list so we know where in the world you are

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