Two In The Think Tank - 219 - Horace de Vere Cole (the Original Prankster)

Episode Date: January 1, 2020

Born in the 1800s, Horace de Vere Cole lead a life full of pranks aiming "to prick the pompous and the vain", recorded live at the Wardrobe in Leeds, we hear about his greatest hits.Matt is performing his new show MONKEY HOUSE is on in HOBART on January 9th and 10th, BRISBANE March 10-15 and MELBOURNE March 26-April 19, find more details/get tickets here: https://mattstewartcomedy.com/gigs (use the code 'podcast' for a special listener discount)Support the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: patreon.com/DoGoOnPodSubmit a topic idea directly to the hat: dogoonpod.com/Submit-a-TopicTwitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: [e-mail] out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader ThomasREFERENCES AND FURTHER READING:https://www.thevintagenews.com/2019/04/20/horace-de-vere-cole/https://www.nytimes.com/2006/04/01/opinion/a-fool-there-was.htmlhttps://sniggle.net/cole.phphttps://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1088790/King-pranksters--uproarious-story-Prime-Minister-8217-s-brother-law.htmlhttp://ahistoryblog.com/2013/05/21/william-horace-de-vere-cole-1881-1936-a-man-of-few-parts/https://www.express.co.uk/expressyourself/228767/Privileged-prankster-who-died-pennilesshttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dreadnought_hoaxhttps://web.archive.org/web/20180509133131/http://blog.nationalarchives.gov.uk/blog/bunga-bunga-great-edwardian-dreadnought-hoax/https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Horace_de_Vere_Cole

Hey everybody, Jess and Dave, just jumping in really quickly at the top here to make sure that you are across all the details for our upcoming Christmas show. That's right, we are doing a live show in Melbourne Saturday December the 2nd, 2023, our final podcast of the year, our Christmas special. It's downstairs at Morris House, which usually be called the European beer cafe. On Saturday December the 2nd, 2023 at 4.30pm, come along, come one, come all, and get tickets at dogoonpod.com. Most weight loss programs are short-term fixes, but managing your weight needs a long-term solution,

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This episode is brought to you by Progressive. Most of you aren't just listening right now. You're driving, cleaning, and even exercising. But what if you could be saving money by switching to Progressive? Drivers who save by switching save nearly $750 on average, and auto customers qualify for an average of seven discounts.

Multitask right now, quoteote today at Progressive.com. Progressive casualty and trans company and affiliates, National Average 12 Month savings of $744 by New Customer Surveyed, who saved with Progressive between June 2022 and May 2023. Potential savings will vary. Discount is not available in all safe and situations. Are you working way too hard for way too little? There's never been a better time to consider a career in IT. You could enjoy a recession-resistant career in a rewarding field, with plenty of growth opportunities and often flexible work environments. Go to mycomputercareer.edu and take the free career evaluation. You could start your new career

in months, not years. Take classes online or on campus, and financial aid is available to qualified students, including the GI Bill. Now is the time, mycomputercareer.edu. This episode of Do-Go on is brought to you by me, Math Stewart, and my 2020 live comedy show, Monkey House. I'm bringing it to Hobart for fringe at the edge of the world, at the Republic, called Pub There, on the 9th and 10th of January. Then I'm going to the Brisbane Comedy Festival in Brisbane at the Powerhouse from the 10th to the 15th of March and back home to Melbourne for the Melbourne International Comedy Festival at the Victoria Hotel from the 26th of March until the 19th of April. You can

grab tickets to all of these shows, come to all of them, why not with the Discount Code podcast for our Matstewordcomedy.com slash gigs. That's matsjewordcomedy.com slash gigs. Anyway, on with the intro. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. Welcome to Do Go On. I'm your host Matt Stewart.

This is a show where we tell you stuff about things and we've got a bloody crack in episode coming up today. It was recorded live in Leeds at the Wardrobe. A fantastic venue there in the north of England. And we had a great time looking forward to you getting to hear it. And I'll be checking back in with you at the end of the episode to give you some more facts, some quotes, some questions and shouting out to a few patrons. That sort of stuff.

But in the meantime, enjoy Dooga on live in Leeds. Good evening ladies and gentlemen! In all of Leeds! People who have definitely haven't already seen me tonight! Are you ready to podcast? I'll thank God that it's so good to be scared of now. Are you ready to welcome the stage all the way from down Australia to ring people and calling myself?

Please welcome, then won't you just break the match to your own studio? Oh, good evening ladies and gentlemen, Lee, tell you're doing tonight! That's what I'm talking about. Thank you so much for coming out and joining us for another episode of Do Go On. My name is Dave Wonke, and I'm standing here with Jess Perkins and Max Schueren! Hello! Hello, everybody. What a pleasure to be here.

All right. I've been cheated, everything you said. And then there was Aurekin. I made a couple hundred people silent, just by being polite. You know, I was just, everything you said. And then there was a reckon, I made a couple hundred people silent just by being polite. I don't know what these people want, those fucking idiots. Okay, I get it. I get it now, you dick fuckers.

We're really, that was mixed. That was a mixed response, though. Setting the tone in there really? Great, let's sit down, let's do this. LAUGHTER Thank you. Now, we're just like you. Seated. Dave, normally to kick it off, you explain the show a little bit.

Have you seen the show before, sir? No. I don't know what it was about you, but I just knew. No. I don't know what it was about you, but I just knew. No, I don't know what it was. And it was the confusion on your face? That shot. At least it's not disdain. Which is what I'm aiming for tonight, so... There was in the front row, too. There's always someone in the front row

who has no idea what they're doing here. And I respect the hell out of that. You as well. Thank you so much. You hate him for that. Oh, man. May I have any beers if you got stacked up there? Forster. Forster.

That took you way too long to count to four. Oh, my God. Well, thanks a biggie. Well, let's get to know you as a group now. On the count of three, give me a round of applause if you've ever heard our show before. If you have heard of it. Oh no.

Oh no. Oh no. You didn't count to three. You said on the count of three and then you just said. Thank you so much. It will take me way too long to count to three. I'm much like this man here. Other end of the scale now, don't be shy.

Let's not make this man feel like he's the only one. Give me a round of applause on No Can of Three if you have never heard our show before. Couple people. So you had the grace to sit over there. LAUGHTER Wait, that really felt like you were having a crack at this man. Oh, her. Oh.

LAUGHTER As long as the target was clear. Wait, that really felt like you were having a crack at this man. Oh, here. Oh. As long as the target was clear, front row center. Honestly, that seat should have been for a true believer. No, thank you very much for coming. You've obviously been dragged. And if you need help, you let me know. If he's had a few too many beers. Count him.

Once he can't count him, we'll get you to a safe place now. I went dark. I'll shut up for a bit. Well, for the people that haven't heard the show before, the few people here, what we do here at the Dugawon podcast is take it in terms to a report on a topic often suggested by a listener. And tonight, it is my good friend Matt Schewert's turn.

Oh, you think of me as a good friend? Oh, that's nice. That's not. I'm always nervous when it's my report, and the crowd are going to be like, oh, fuck. They were very polite about it. And with you on this, we were all with you. All right, great. Well, the way we get on to topic, Sir, is... I'll ask a question, and then they try to to answer and that'll get us on to the topic. If they don't know, maybe someone in the crowd will,

will, and will. LAUGHTER The question is, who was the original prankster? LAUGHTER LAUGHTER I also thought of the offspring straight away. LAUGHTER A song that I gave way too much credit for when it came out and upon re-listing it's no good.

Jesus. Jesus. Jesus. That's a good answer. Just tricking. Gotcha. No, it wasn't. But that would be a real funny way to do it.

Do a report on Jesus. It was the actual prankster. I'm keeping that one in the back of my mind. The next time you asked the question, who was the original prankster, well, no, you're doing the Jesus Christ report. 100% that's going to happen. The Jesus Christ?

Yeah. Yeah, originally. The Jesus Christ reported the end of that sentence. So it didn't make sense Originally he was the Jesus Christ until Justin Timberlake came along and said drop the thought So you get that social network anyway When you explain it's a good call. That is pretty funny if you get it. And I did know. I'm confident you probably don't know this name because I've never heard of it.

Before does anyone have any guesses in here? Is it a Roman guy? Yeah, look to be honest, it wouldn't be the original. It's from the late 1800s, but someone probably pranked pre him but I don't know what you think pranks are but I'd call what he's done a little more than a prank allegedly Allegedly. Allegedly. Allegedly. That is important. This one goes public then. I need to move. That covers you legally. I'm feeling a little bit stressed up here, and fortunately I'm not able to sweat, so you can't see that.

I was in the Forkland sport. I could always cue cumber, never sweat, never... I'm a Brooklyn Swole. Cool as a cucumber, never sweat, never... Never sweat. It was not Prince Andrew, but it was in fact a man named Horace DeVe Kohl. Horace DeVe Kohl was my guess. You always get it! That was it! Yeah, well done. Can you use either name again? Errr...

Horace DeVe Kohl. Can you say the name again? Oh, hi, sir. No. Horus de Verve Cole. Is that close enough? Close enough, yeah. What do I miss? Are you out of the... Did I? Anyway, I was suggested by Callum McDonald and Alistair McGregor.

A couple of macas. All right, here we go. Horus de Verve Cole. So now I'm gonna start telling him about something. He probably would have picked that up, but I don't wanna leave any man behind. All women.

Wait, I'm confused by the heckle, but I liked it all the same. I'm telling you, I'm confusion. What he've done. I've given him confidence. It's the worst thing a heck look can have. Horace. Horace DeVirke-Cole was born on the 5th of May 1881 in County Corp. Oh, thank you.

A very good one, OK? 1881, a very good year. Fantastic year. Wow. So it's born in County Corp Island. His parents were William Uting Cole, a British Army officer in Mary DeVier. Uting.

Uting. Love that. His father William, the Uting one, died of cholera in India when Cole was butter boy. Butter boy. It was a little phasier, he thought he'd be a superhero, but go out of it. Cole's family was full of movers and shakers. His mum was from the D'ia family, or Diver, depending on how it's actually pronounced,

that once held the now dormant title of Earl of Oxford for centuries. They held it for like centuries. Yeah. And now it's dormant, will it erupt once again? You never know. His dad's dad got rich in the quinine game. It's pronounced quinoa. Quidditch quinoa.

It's apparently it's the flavour of tonic water and maybe a malaria medication maybe. Yeah, that okay. It's a scientist in, so that's handy. I just fear I didn't tonic. Okay, I know what is the word quinine. Quineine, it actually doesn't come up again, but thank you. That's come on Just in case personal knowledge It's good to know

The clothes under UV Don't we all Holy fuck, you all sound the same What you doing? Is that you? Don't want to yours? Oh. I'm so sorry for you guys. You sound like me.

Socked in. His sister Annie would go on to marry future British Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain. Yeah, a few Chamberlain heads in. Yeah. His great uncle was an Irish poet of note named Aubrey Devere. Yeah, damn. No, have you or you just like willing? His paternal uncle Alfred Clayton Cole would go on to be the governor of the Bank of England. Wow, this is your Kennedy family.

Yeah, this is amazing. Sorry, everyone in the family seemed to do something big. According to the express.co.uk, very good source, he rebelled against his posh upbringing, becoming a socialist and fierce critic of anyone who took themselves too seriously, or wielded authority unfairly. His stated aim was to prick the pompous and the vein. Despite this, Cole was educated at the prestigious pompous Eton school.

That's a Prince William school, is it? Yeah, apparently it's famous for having produced 20 British PMs, including Pitt the Elder, who is my, I would call the best of a British man. And also the second best ever Prime Minister, Boris Johnson. Yeah, how do you feel about him here? I feel about him here. I'm not going to talk about that. Honestly, my favourite is the one from Leeds. Not every city has a prime minister.

What do you mean? What? After Eaton, Cole became a lieutenant in the army and rose to the rank of acting captain during the Second Ball War. On the 2nd of July 1900, he was wounded and recovered in hospital over the following months before leaving the army due to his injuries. He was given 1800 pounds for his disability pension, which he donated to a fun for war widows and orphans.

That's very nice. Was he able to sweat? Never again. Never again. Did he ever take his daughter to a pizza express? Allegedly. Allegedly. I mean, we can't confirm that he definitely went to a pizza express. Very controversial thing for a royal to do. The most controversial thing I've heard associated with that with him. Is that right?

Well, don't read any further. In 1902, Cole went to Trinity College of Cambridge. This was the setting for his first great hoax, or prank. I totally forgot what we were talking about, prank. Yeah. I was like, I was talking about, prank. Yeah. I was like, when does this guy get interested? Here we go. Cole read in a newspaper that the Sultan of Zanzibar

was visiting England. So along with his chum, which I assume is what he calls his mates, Adrian Steven, they hatched a plan to fool the town. To set it up, they sent a telegram to the mayor saying, quote, the Sultan of Zanzibar will arrive today at Cambridge at 427 for a short visit. Could you arrange to show him buildings of interest and send carriage?

And sorry, he was turning up at 420. I knew you couldn't let that go. You can't get there two minutes earlier, or just wait three minutes. I don't know if he can control the trains, man. You're the Sultan of Zanzibar. Yeah, he can control the trains. You can control the trains.

I think something's been lost in translation here. He's pretending to be the Sultan of Zanzibar. What? So the groundwork was done, and Colin Steven got dressed up in the most Zanzibabarian garb they could find Getting robes and turbines from a theater costume guy named Willie Clarkson Probably was one of the best in the biz of course To complete their look they wore what one article called heavy makeup, which is code

What for theater makeup or what or what's that code for? Yeah, don't get theatre make up. Theatre, yeah. What about that right? Dark shade of theatre. Just a make up. I don't know if she doesn't exactly match your skin tone. Right.

Right. A lot of shades. Yeah, black face. Black face, yeah. Oh. Right. Right, a lot of shades. Yeah, blackface. Blackface, yeah. Oh! Stephen dressed as the Sultan while Cole poses his translator. Oh, no.

When they arrived, according to The New York Times, the Cambridge town clerk or clerk met their train at the station and escorted the Royal Party with full pomp to the Guild Hall where the mayor gave them a formal reception. I didn't think it was weird that the Royal Party was too do's. I thought the Sultan would just travel with one friend. Yeah, surely he would have brought Turtle and E and the rest of their gang. I read somewhere that they brought a few friends along but I like to picture just the two of them. They then spent the day receiving a guided tour of the university, including their own

college. Oh! There's pictures of them on the wall, they're like, oh! Just leaning strategically. During the tour, they were seen by friends. But somehow, we're not recognized. Wow, the black face was dark. Like, black face doesn't...

It looks like white people. It doesn't look like black, you know, it doesn't... Yeah. It's not convincing. You said this guy was the best in the biz. He transformed them. Yeah, it actually worked. People were convinced that it was the saltmobzanzibar.

I can't believe they wouldn't just be so over the top that it's like, this isn't real. Apparently the English are pretty gullible. Down south. LAUGHTER APPLAUSE Oh, fuck, that was close. LAUGHTER

At another point, they were almost caught out when an elderly woman wanted to talk to the Sultan in his native tongue. But according to an article in the Daily Mail, the quick thinking diver Cole, averted disaster by explaining that she could only address the Sultan if she became part of his haram. She declined the offer. Probably, probably a good call on her butt, yeah. Soon after, with less than an hour after arriving, they asked to be returned to the train station. You know, as all royals travel.

At 527 they were back. Sorry, sorry. So dumb. It was less than an hour. It could have been 5.22, 5.21. It could have been any of those numbers. 20 would have been great. No.

But they didn't want to commit to the bit and catch the next train of London. So they ran out and a side exit, jumped in a cab and went to a friend's place to get out of their costumes and returned to school before the 10pm curfew. LAUGHTER Nuts. LAUGHTER The hoax received media attention in the following days after Cole gave an interview to the Daily Mail.

He was like, yeah, I sucked him in. The St. James Gazette called the joke a most audacious practical joke. Feeling embarrassed, the mayor, after the mayor sort of looked at all these photos with him and she'll let him round himself, the mayor was pretty embarrassed by it. He wanted the pranksters to be punished and thrown out of the school, but the Vice Chancellor was able to convince him that it would only lead to more negative attention and embarrassment.

The mayor didn't take any further action, meaning the guy's basically got away with it, Scott free. Was it actually the vice chancellor? Was it the son dressed up? No, I don't think we should be punishing them. So that's one of his better known pranks, one of his first big ones, but it's only one of a very long list. So you just got to wait long enough and then they'll feel awkward and then one of them will try to get an applause going, I won't pay off but... But they'll try. Yeah. His pranks tend to be the expensive people he viewed as pompous, often figures of authority or other pretentious types. People call for what needed to be taken down a peg or two.

One such prank occurred at a theatre during a performance of what Colesaw is a pretentious play. Bit of a wankfest probably. The way the story is told varies based on the source. But the gist is that Col gets hold of some tickets to the show. These tickets for seats in strategic locations, which he then distributes to a bunch of bald men. From the balcony, the bald head spell out a rude word.

LAUGHTER Do we know the word? It's reported differently, the bollocks or shit. Depends on how many bulls are there. How many bulls are available that day? The end of the show is us turning around and you see this swear word shaved into the back of our heads. I reckon that'll show those cross the oldents. Bollocks, oh dear.

Another time in London, Cole organised a dinner party, spending a bunch of time deciding who to invite. It's very particular guest list. And once the party kicked off, he left, letting all the guests interact with each other and introduce each other. And they soon figured out that all of them had bottom in their last name Chan hello Lord side bottom. I'm Johnny rear bottom

First thing you thought of. Any re-bottoms in tonight? Yeah! How did I know? In January 1910, Cole's chum from Eden, all of a locker-lampson, was elected to Parliament. Cole was with locker-lampson when he challenged the newly elected Parliamentary into a foot-race down a London street.

To sweeten the deal, Cole offered to a foot race down a London street. To sweeten the deal, Cole offered the MP a 10 foot head start. Of course, being a Horace DeVir Cole story. I lost control, that's a hard name to say. Horace DeVir Cole story. It wasn't a simple foot race. Prior to running, Cole quietly slipped his gold watch into

locker-lampson's pocket. Then, as the two men began running, with locker-lampson 10 feet ahead, Cole started yelling, stop thief! That's so good. And this is a newly elected MP, yeah. So a policeman promptly stopped Locker Lampson and it was in the process of arresting him before Cole came clean telling him, it was all just a joke, I'm the original prank that I'm not aware about. I don't know if he. I didn't even handle it with business cards.

After the cop realised the, uh, released the politician though, Cole started waving a stick around like he was conducting an orchestra. It's a real man, dog. This was enough for the cop to change his mind and he arrested both men. He was, he was holding a stick. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. What's the charge conducting without a permit?

Apparently, it was, he was seen to be moving his stick around in a dangerous manner. Lager Lampson was released without charge, though, while Cole was found guilty of a breach of the peace and fined five pounds. Ridiculous, which in today's money is probably a little bit more than that. 15, 20? Well, I think you can pick around. Yeah.

That's so dumb. This all brings us up to his most famous prank. Oh, my whistle has been wet by these early pranks. Yeah. A couple of little old derves to get us ready. That same year, Cole pulled off his piece of the resistance horse, which is French for peace of resistance. I'm pretty sure that's true.

Anyone speak French? No, so we'll never know, so we'll never know the truth. I'm pretty confident. It's what is now known as the Drednaut hoax, as well as being an Australian heavy metal band. Drednaut was also the name of a new class of ship in Britain's Navy in the early 20th century. Britain's Navy in the early 1900s

was apparently the envy of the world and one of the foundations of the Empire's strength. The Drednau built on this foundation with the new ship being described, according to the BBC, as the most deadly fighting machine ever launched in the history of the world. Yeah, God bless. God seen, Gareth. You've not seen, Gareth. I'm not, I can't. And then a very tall skinny man did this. I've seen Gareth. You've not seen Gareth. I've not. I guess. And then a very tall skinny man did this. Yeah, I'm shit scared, Gareth.

You've not seen Perkah. All right, I now know how the show ends tonight. May killing Gareth. His name's Garith. I'm scared. Not Garith. Release the Garith. Yeah, I can't hear it now.

That is scary. The Britannica. All right. The Britannica. The Britannica states, the dreadnought immediately made all preceding battleships obsolete. Wow. See, let it battleships. Yeah Wow. See a letter of battleships? Yeah, it'd be one of the previous ones.

Is that the way all the way through the entire? Yeah, this is one ship left in the whole world. That's kind of nice. The Dreadnought became a powerful national symbol for the British people. This is you guys. Yeah! Woo-hoo!

And he dreadheads him. It's unveiling Drew and an enormous. I had a second anem. For just to really underline how enormous it was. Ananonymous. It's unveiling Drew and Ananonymous. Crowd. And this power was even harnessed by advertising executives. Historian Jan Ruger has listed examples of...

Jan Ruger has listed examples of John Ruger. Sorry, sorry. Matt missed an accent on her name, so. I forgot how much talking I was going to do. I've overestimated how many beers I can drink. So according to historian Jan Rueger, there are plenty of examples of where the dreadnought was used by marketing types, including for oxo stock cubes, where they used the slogan, drink oxo and dreadnought.

That's pretty good. Is that a pun? Yeah, yeah, so what's a play on words? Yeah. Oh, yeah. He calls everything a pun. I'm right, I know. It's more nuance than that. Is it? Is this the time to have the combo? Can anyone like, can I honestly explain what a pun is to me?

No, I don't. Yeah, that is a pun. It's a wordplay. It is just wordplay. And puns are wordplay. I don't play all wordplay. Oh. So I think it's wordplay, but this is a play on words.

And I think there's a difference between this and that. I forgot that your culture is actually built around puns. I love them here. Yeah. Woo-hoo! Does everyone actually go to the Christmas pantomorms? There's, so we see signs of them everywhere. It's so nice.

Oh, yeah, that's so nice. Oh, no. I don't know how I get it. That is good fun. Oh, yeah, that's true. I don't know how I get it. That is good fun. I could do that every year and still enjoy myself. Yeah, no one can lessen it. This is where Shakespeare was wrong. But, yeah, that was a lot of Shakespeare too.

Was it really? No. Fuck. Yeah, it was both of them you have to suspend a lot of belief. Okay. And disbelief? I got to suspend belief. You are not dropping us out.

Suspend your belief. You will not disbelieve what you're about to see. You will not disbelieve. Is that a pun? No, I know it's not. I know it's not. Ah, this guy's curious. He needs people to understand what puns are and aren't. And their wordplay, not play on word. Anyway, a tailoring business also used a slogan around that time. Well, let's find out. Dread naught and wear British clothing.

It's basically the same pun. What a vague advertisement. Wear British clothing. Yeah. Any, any. As if you want it. Oh, yeah, soft sell. I love it. Yeah, yeah. Negum, you yeah, soft-sale. I love it.

Yeah, yeah. Negum, you know, like, Negum. You were in those shoes with that hat? Good luck. Anyway, I want to make out. Am I doing alright? I only read the first chapter. You were in those shoes with that hat. Am I in the right bullpark there?

Which one is this, is this the secret or is this the game? Doesn't matter. Two very good, good reads. The game. The game. Hey, don't hate the... Yeah! The CF Martin Guitar Company released their top of the line acoustic guitar around this time,

calling it Dreadnaut, after the ship. That's why it's relevant. After a ship. Yeah, because it was big and top of the line and a world beater and the ship. That's why it's relevant. After a ship. Yeah, because it was big and top of the line and a world-bater and the bass. And it couldn't acoustic guitar. Is that why last night, or early, I can't remember what it was,

we're driving along today and in Glasgow, there was a guitar shop, a picture of a guitar, and Martin acoustic guitar. And he said, you know what kind of guitar that is? What style? And I said, I think it's a dread note and he just went, yeah. And then he goes, yeah, then he went kind of quiet at the backseat and went, honestly those two things are not related. Since then, it has been mimicked, that style of guitar has been mimicked by most other acoustic guitar manufacturers. This style of guitar is now known as Dreadnaught, regardless of the manufacturer.

Fun fact early, huh? Yeah! Jeez, look at them having fun out there. A smattering of applause, thank you so much. That back pocket, they've got my back. These front motherfuckers, no. Yeah. He's up to six.

Thank you so much. Someone has said you got this. I was a huge rig. He was a guy drinking. May you got this. I was so curious about drinking. I got this. Anyway, point is the dreadnought was an important ship to the British Navy and guitars and whatever. And also the British people. And what we were talking about. Pranks! Yes. I think something is going to happen to the dreadnought.

Were you talking about the the Australian Metal Band? Yes. Yeah, that's true. They're going to have mild success over many years. This episode is brought to you by Progressive. Most of you aren't just listening right now. You're driving, cleaning, and even exercising. But what if you could be saving money by switching to Progressive?

Drivers who saved by switching saved nearly $750 on average, and auto customers qualify for an average of 7 discounts. Multitask right now. Quote today at Progressive.com Progressive casualty and trans company and affiliates National average 12 month savings of $744 by new customer surveyed who saved with Progressive between June 2022 and May 2023. Potential savings will vary.

Discount is not available in all safe and situations. Are you working way too hard for way too little? There's never been a better time to consider a career in IT. You could enjoy a recession-resistant career and a rewarding field, with plenty of growth opportunities and, often, flexible work environments. Go to mycomputercareer.edu and take the free career evaluation. You could start your new career in months, not years. Take classes online or on campus.

And financial aid is available to qualified students, including the GI Bill. Now is the time. Mycomputercareer.edu A Kia SUV is capable of taking you far. But when you use it locally to help your community, you go even further. Whether that's carrying cargo, bringing your team with you, ready, or navigating your terrain. Power up your capability with the right Kia SUV.

Do more with the Kia Sportage, Kia Telluride, Kia Sorento, or Kia Saltoves. Kia. Movement that inspires. Call 800-333-4-Kos? Kia. Movement that inspires. Call 800-333 or Kia for details. Always stripes safely. Um, so yeah, the British people love this dreadnought. Does anyone here old enough to remember

when the dreadnought was king? I am him. You am him. You am him the ship. I'm going to stop asking you questions. So the British people found it very important so much so that someone like Horace... Oh my God! What is wrong with you?

Well, that's two of us that aren't driving on. Horace Verdakoul might see it as needing to be taken down a peg or two. He's going to take the ship down. Oh, no. Duret. He's going to take it down a notch, mate. This ship's got a really good. Yeah, oh, yeah, big time. Do you remember Adrian Steven from just before? Yes, he's Chum.

Yes. His sister, Adrian Steven Sista, was Virginia Steven. Oh, close. Later to marry a man named Wolf, making her Wolfy Lady, man, Virginia Wolf. Famous for being portrayed by our Nicole. And the film hours or something. Haven't seen it, but they did Nicole Kidman, National Treasure.

Yeah! They hate Nicole. She wanted Academy Award for that portrayal. It's so boring! It's just very beige. Like, she's got something in her basement, you know? But beige for you is a serial killer? What?

What do you mean she just has storage? Yeah. Bage paint. Oh, God! She should not fuck with Nicole Kidman. She could not fuck with her. Oh my god. I'm so sorry Nicole.

Nicole. Oh no, we're in Nicole's basement. We didn't know. It's like that movie that she's in where we would go saw the long or something. LAUGHTER He's talking about Tony Collette in the sixth cent. No, what am I talking about? The other one!

The other one! The other one! Oh, I cannot understand what he's saying. The other one! Oh, the others, yes. Holy shit, it sounds like they're saying something else. All right. It sounds like we're saying the others.

Oh. I fucking love your accent so much. Thanks for translating. Was that an echo? It makes you old. It went, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, Love it so good Leads girl are you out there Cartier Stand up I am standing Anyway, so Virginia Woolf is Adrian Steven sister in 1940 Woolf spoke about the origin of the dreadnaught hoax, remembering

that some officers of the dreadnaught and another naval ship, the hawk, had a bit of a feud saying, quote, Coles friend who was on the hawk, had come to Col and said to him, you're a great hand at hoaxing people. Couldn't you do something to pull the leg of the dreadnaught? They want taking down a bit. Ships don't have legs. How the fuck do you prank a ship? It doesn't give a ship. That's a pun! That's a pun! That is a pun!

This is the only country you get away with that in. Try and tell me that's not a fucking pun. In Australia, honestly, that would get a boo in Australia. I love that kind of thing here. That would take away just this comedy license for that. So this man who went to coal ended up saying, couldn't you manage to play off one of your jokes against them? This must have been music to Coles Ears is because he started planning a big old prank.

And it pretty much resembled the earlier Zanzibar hoax. He dressed up as a ship. Did he know it's me, the dreadful? He's wearing grey face. Yes, I am made of metal. And I was really awkward because he accidentally had book two ship dates that same night. I'm either side of the dock. To do so, he recruited a group of friends including Adrian Steven, Virginia Steven, later Wolf.

Future Barrister Guy Ridley, soldier Anthony Buston and painter Duncan Grant. Grant, wolf and Stephen were all associated with the influential Bloomsbury group. If you remember that. Mmm. Yeah, modernist people. Yeah. The costuming skills of Willie Clarkson were again employed.

No. Turbans, fake bids, and yes, blackface. LAUGHTER Once again used in an attempt to a resemble the Abyssinian Royal family. So, you say Abyssinian. Abyssinian. Thank you. LAUGHTER

Apparently, the stage makeup was fragile, meaning the group couldn't eat for fear of it rubbing off. How the fuck did they eat? They... My little cats. Is that how they do it? Yes. A telegram was sent to the commander-in-Chief of the Home Fleet, writing Prince Maccolon of...

What did you say? Abacinia. Abacinia. And sweet arrive at 420 today. LAUGHTER Wamous. He wishes to see Dreadnaught kindly arrange meet them on arrival.

Despite the message misspelling Abacinia, miss one ass, that's probably what I was pronouncing wrong. The message seemed to work. There's an interesting note in Peter Stanksky's book, the discuss the events, saying that Cole found a post office staff by women I have women only to send the telegram. Telegram? Is that the telegram? I've been here like four days, and I'm already speaking like them. So his logic was that women were going to be less likely to ask questions. And he was right, they didn't. And I can say that as a feminist. Cole dressed in a top hat and tails went along with the fake Abbasinian entourage to pattington station in London, telling a staff member

at the station that he was Herbert Commondelli of the foreign office and that he needed a special train to take them to Weymouth. The station master obliged, arranging them a VIP coach. Imagine that, we should try that. Yeah, then it had a spare train sitting there. Arriving in Weymouth, they were greeted with a naval on a guard. According to the Daily Mail, once they arrived, the naval top brass suspected nothing, and the royal guests were Julia Shutterboard for a full tour of the ship and its famous guns.

In response to descriptions of the dreadnoughts awesome firepower, the visitors reportedly nodded appreciatively and replied, Bunga Bunga. Remembering they're still in blackface. Virginia Woolf is in this, Virginia Woolf in a beard and blackface is going around saying Bunga Bunga. She's one of your most famous writers. And also was played by Annacole. LAUGHTER LAUGHTER Things got nervy on the ship when the group were invited to lunch. Oh, no.

Knowing that this would spell disaster for their makeup, a quick thinking Adrian Steven, posing as the interpreter, explained that eating would be unacceptable on religious grounds. And they accepted that. We don't eat. We don't eat. We don't eat. We're religious. If we eat, well, the chef will have to join our haram. I'm afraid.

That is a rule. They also showed their appreciation to the naval officers by attempting to give them fake military honours. I guess it was attempted. The military didn't accept a military. No, thank you. No, thank you. No, thank you. Adrian and Virginia's cousin,

naval commander Willie Fisher was present throughout. But failed to recognize the close relationship. You lost your Willie Fisher. The cousin was in the tour. He didn't recognize his two close cousins. That makeup dude is really good. Did you knew what was wearing a beard? Yeah, she was pretty well hidden.

Yeah. It wasn't until later that the prank was revealed, with Cole sending a photo of the group in costume to the Daily Mirror. Looking at the photo, it is wild to think that they won't uncover it. The prank led to much embarrassment and ridicule for the Royal Navy and much like the Cambridge Mayor, the Navy demanded the perpetrators be arrested. But as they hadn't technically broken any laws at the time, they once away got away with it. Barring a symbolic R-spanking by junior Royal Navy officers. I mean, they fully got away with it except for just a tiny little wallet.

Does your Navy still spank people? Is that a... Allegedly. Allegedly. I mean, yes. Yeah, I was spank so harder than AVI lost the ability to sweat and... Isn't it amazing that nothing they did there was illegal fooling the navy by pretending like impersonating a royal and being in blackface

all of that was above board apparently um that was his grandest prank probably but throughout his life Cole also performed much smaller pranks including this one is told by the daily male a regular prank was to wander the streets with a cow's utter poking through his fly. LAUGHTER Do you just mean like a little teet or a full utter? LAUGHTER

I was picturing just a teet, but full utter. Oh, what's happening there? LAUGHTER At the moment of optimum outrage, he would then produce a pair of scissors and snip off the offending protrusion. He sounds like one of those friends who's really fun in small doses. You know, you're like, oh, it's a bit of fun, but sharehouse, but thank you. Yeah, does not turn off. He's on. He's always on.

Future Prime Minister, Neville Chamberlain, was later asked by Colesys to Annie, what he thought of her brother. He later recalled, I was obliged to say what I did think. But fortunately, it appeared that her opinion was the same, and she was not all inclined to be proud of her brother's exploit. It appears that he is 28. I think he must be a little mad. In 1918 when Cole was 37, he married an 18-year-old Irish-Ares named Denise Lynch. Good instincts there. Yes, it is creepy. Yes. Oh, right.

Well, are they doing it? Is it because she's Irish or? That's waiting until it's 30. To take a younger bride. No. Maybe. Let's wait, let's wait, we'll be a better man. APPLAUSE Don't you paint me like that. So would you call that paint you in black face?

I'd prefer grey face, thank you very much. So they were married, 37-year-, 18 year old Lynch, and on their honeymoon in Venice, Cole left his bride one night to perform another prank. Just go on out for a prank, see you in a minute. I got you a thing. He went on their honeymoon, he couldn't hold it back. Take a fucking holiday buddy. It's good job.

He's got to get a driller hole in a gondola or something. and hold it back. Take a fucking holiday buddy. It's your job. He's got to get a drill a hole in a gondola or something. Imagine. This is hilarious. When the moon hits your eyes. I don't know a real Italian song, so I just sang that one. Well, I'm actually one-eighths with a time, so... I think it's one-sixteenths, sorry. So I could tell you a few, Valbenne Amore, Céz, Senor, Rorator.

There are a couple of big hits, but it's a beautiful language. It's a beautiful language. Ah, lasagna, la beautiful. This is Borderline Races. I did tell him I was one- one-sixteenth Swiss Italian. Yeah, but they can hear the sound coming out of your mouth. That sort of gives a different impression, if I can be honest. Ah, va bene va bene va bene. Ah, la la. The prank this time-ben-i-va-ben. Ah, Laura. The prank this time on his honeymoon was to travel to the Italian mainland

to purchase horse manure before returning to Venice with it and sprinkling it around the town under the cover of darkness. His wife is now sleeping. He's taking a boat back to the mainland to buy horse manure. And back. And back.

Sprinkled it around town. Ha ha ha ha. He has got them. So Venice was a city without horses, you see. This is the prank. So locals would have woken up the next morning confused. Why, all the horse poop? And he would have been there going, psych.

And that would have been saying, sorry I know... Dispouched, no English. Comment to Kiamil, Mikiamil Mateo. It's one of the phrases I remember from my childhood at the Swiss Italian boy. Cole and Lynch had a daughter named Valerie together,

but when Cole's property investments in Canada went sour in 1928, the marriage fell apart. She dropped him as soon as he went sort of bankrupt. OK. But she was rich. Kids are my wife. Wasn't she an heirous? Yeah.

So why don't you need him for the money? Well, I guess, you know, that's all he had, I don't you eat him for the money? Well, I guess you know that's all he had I don't know Probably also he went pranking on the honeymoon Colt Colt moved to France kind of it kind of exiled himself he moved over to France and at the age of 50 He married once again this time a little older a 23-year-old A little older, a 23-year-old. Oh! Relatively younger, but, you know, literally older than the 18-year-old at the time, but actually younger than her now. Yes.

Her name was Mabel Wright, but as the daily mirror writes, and also the daily mail, which is more accurately what this one is called. In this marriage, the joke was on him when his second wife gave birth to a son. The child had turned out, had been fired by another man, the artist, Augustus John, a friend of Coles. Jokes on you, the hair. The ultimate friend. The prankster of him. The prankster of him.

The prankster of him. The prankster of him. The prankster of him. The prankster of him. The prankster of him. The prankster of him. The prankster of him. The Maine! Got him. The New York Times also cruelly points out that, in the end, even the strategies of subterfuge that had seen Cole through a lifetime of practical joking began to betray him. The ordinarily restrained dictionary of national biography reports that Cole's, quote, advanced deafness prevented him from realizing that his carefully timed coughing was inadequate to cover his explosive breaking of wind.

We've all tried to cover a fart in the cough. But all good things must come to an end. And in 1936, at the relatively young age of 54, Horace DeVir Cole died of a heart attack. A year later, his brother-in-law, Neville Chamberlain, would become the PM, and the Daily Mail observes, what a pity for that bleak era in British history that vertical was not around to lighten the mood. Ah, yes. The end.

That's true everybody. I like to finish on a real high note. Yeah. Remember when he pretended to an utter was his dick? And then cut it off. Did he start screaming when he did that? Yes. Yes he did.

That does sound fun. We have the day off tomorrow. Want to go pranking? Yeah. Anyone got any spare udders? Are we in utter country? What's lead's as big thing? Adders, yeah.

Great. Well, we've come to the wrong place. That looks really well. And also, of course, Mark Varduka. But not the other one where I've been told I should not mention the other Australian leads player. Nicole Kittman. Do not say that.

Harry Kew. Apparently he's a real dog. They don't give a fuck. I forgot that our audience doesn't give a shit about sport. But from that guy. I think the show's over now. Oh, it's behind you. Thank you. Thank you. Leave, leave, leave, leave, leave, leave, leave.

Leave, leave, leave, leave, leave. How we doing on the back? No, she's dead. She's gone. That's her bedtime. She had a 10pm curfew. Thank you so much for coming out, Ledith and we're going to say thank you very much one more time and until next time I'll say good bye

Bye Cheers Well, what a fantastic show Compliments to the chef there We had a really fantastic time and leads, and really on the whole UK and Ireland tour, would recommend doing it. So as if you ever do, you get the chance to tour a podcast

across those fantastic aisles, you should, you really should. But before I close out the show this week, I've got a few fun things to tell you about, including everyone's favorite segment of the show. It's the fact quote or question section of the show. And to get in on this action, you can go to patreon.com. Thank you. I almost forgot patreon.com slash do go on pod.

And you can spot the show there in a number of ways, different levels get you different awards, there's things like bonus episodes, we do two a month now, you can also get in on a private Facebook group where there's a lot of chat every day about different do go on-ish subjects and a bunch of other things, including shout outs. But this one, if you're on the Sydney

Sharnberg Deluxe Memorial Package level, you can rest in peace, you can give me a factor quote or a question, and that is exactly what the following two people have done. Firstly, long time fact-quotal questioner, Kevin Ulysses, Packrad, and you also get to give yourself a title, and Kevin has given himself the title of an ordinary man, except I'm actually a bagel. Whoa, you sound delicious, Kevin. And he is offered us, not a fact, not a question, but a quote. And this is that quote. I don't read them until I read them. So in case I fumble, that's my excuse. Kevin writes, Kevin the bagel writes, this is one of my favorite quotes

from the Wes Anderson film, The Grand Budapest Hotel. Please read it in a fancy British accent. Okay, can do, you plan on my strong suit there. I'm the man, not only for a thousand noises, but I also do 17 different voices. So that's a lie. I do about six, six different voices, but here's one of those. Let me get that quote back up here. You know, a memento. Okay, what did you want? A fancy British accent. Okay, here we go. momentum. Okay, what did you want to do? A fancy British accent. Okay, here we go. Mm-hmm. Been watching a bit of the crown. I've finished

season through the crown. So I'll merge all of the characters from that into one voice here. Mm-hmm. You see there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse. It's kind of a bit television there. That was once known as humanity. Indeed, that's what we provide. Oh, Churchill. That's what we provide in our own modest humble, it's significant, I have fuck it. That's a quote from Gustav H.

I think I appreciate everyone listening through this part of the show. I'm sure that everyone's still tuning in and would have really enjoyed what I did there. I was kind of imagining if Winston and Lizzie had a like a South African child. And there's nothing fancier than that in terms of British accents. Thanks so much, Kevin. Hopefully that is what you were looking for. So I hope I'm saying it a bit distracted there. I've zoomed in too far on my screen. I can't get it to shrink,

shrink, damn you shrink, but it won't. Anyway, I'll get through this. I've gone through tougher times, even when having too much zoom on my screen. The second fact-quotal question comes from RT. And he's or she's given themselves, or she's given themselves the nickname, also the title, Alien Overlord Welcomer. And again, a quote, another quote, fantastic. The quote is, oh, they say, hi, I'd like you guys to read my favorite quote. It's from Terry Pratchett's Nightwatch, and I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Terry Pratchett, I've been keen to do a Terry Pratchett

episode of Primates at some point because the librarian, a bunch of people have told me is an orangutan. And there's also maybe a bee-cooler if we can get a bookcheek. Anyway, it doesn't matter. This quote from RT is from Nightwatch, Terry Pratchett's book. And it goes like this, mm-hmm.

You'd like freedom, truth, and justice, wouldn't you, Comrade Sergeant, said Reg encouragingly, I'd like to be a hard-boiled reg," said Vimes, shaking the match out. There was some nervous laughter, but Reg looked offended. In the circumstances, Sergeant, I think we should set our sights a little higher. Well, yes, we could. Said Vombs, coming down the steps. He glanced at the sheets of paper in front of Regg. The man cared.

He really did, and he was serious. He really was. But, well, Regg. Tomorrow the sun will come up again, and I'm pretty sure that whatever happens, we won't have found freedom, and there won't be a whole lot of justice and I'm damn sure we won't have found truth but it's just possible that I might get a hard boiled egg. It's good quote. It's a passage. That was fun. I didn't I don't know if I fully took it all in as I was reading it but I'll read that again privately soon.

But yeah, no, that is true. You, um, freedom and truth and justice, I'm likely to come to you overnight. Hard boiled egg. I mean, it's all about keeping your expectations in check, I suppose. Fantastic quote. Thank you so much, RT, and new alien overlord, Welcoma. quite. Thank you so much RT and new alien overlord, welcome. Someone else we like to do in the the end section of the show is to thank a few patreon's

and this week we normally do a game that just comes up with. I guess it would be appropriate for us to us being me sitting here by myself to do some sort of prank related thing. Maybe I'll give each of the shout outs a certain prank starting with. So I forget that we had a few holes in our system, the way that Patreon sorts the names by date, seems to throw up some random holes. So I've been going back through and finding all the people who have missed over the years. So I've just got to go find who it is. Okay.

So this week, I'd love to thank longtime supporter, waiting very patiently. I'd have to assume from Bingham in Nottinghamshire in Great Britain, it's Benjamin McRobby. So he's been waiting a couple of years, I really appreciate that very much, Benjamin, and maybe what's your prank, okay, maybe your dad, right? Benjamin's got his dad's hats, and he put them all in a bag, and he put the bag of hats up above a door and then when his dad goes through that door all the hats fall down on his dad.

And it was a pretty good break. Oh, that is very good Benjamin. I wish I was there to see the look on their face as those hats came tumbling down. Quite a collection too, as I understand it, so many hats, many, many hats, but not where they should be up on the hats there. No, no, no, they are all falling all over the dad. Very good stuff. Well done, Robbie. I love that one very much. Thank you so much for your support over these many years. Who else have we got here? Who else have been waiting patiently?

So scroll down here. Okay, from two harbors in MN, USA, MN, I'm gonna guess is Minnesota, Minnesota. I'd love to thank Nathan Hanson. Nathan Hanson, you bloody legend. And your prank, of course, quite actually, I think it made the papers when you took one car. You took just the one car to start with. You got to start small. And you tipped it on its roof. And all the people came out and they were like, what was that car on its roof? And the thing was, you were still inside the car and you were asleep.

And that through extra confusion into it, even you didn't know how to explain that part because you really should have got away from the prank but no. You remained there at the scene of the crime asleep inside the car and I was spinning around on its roof and the person whose car it was, who was your third cousin, was pretty upset. But you still, you don't look back and laugh now and that's the main thing and thanks so much for your support Nathan Hanson, your bloody legend from two harbors Minnesota or somewhere at least in the United States of America. I'd also love to thank another patiently waiting supporter of the show from Dundee in

Scotland. Dundee, I know there's a Stuart, my name's Stuart, a surname Stuart is actually a Scottish name as Scottish Roots. And Dundee, there's a Stuart whiskey there, Stuart's Dundee Decanta. I've never been able to get my hands on one. Scott, if you're down the shops and you see one, feel free to grab it and I'll pick it up off your next home, I'll be in town. Did I say your name?

I'm saying Scott, as if that's just the, I mean that is where you're from, you're a Scott, but your name is also Scott McFarlane. If I didn't already say that, Scott McFarlane of Dundee and Scotland, your prank course was you went for a swim and you told everyone you were going for a swim and you did go for a swim, that's not the prank. The prank is hopefully gonna be the next thing I say and that is that during the swim, you just kept going.

You kept going and going, you said you were just going out for a little swim, you're going to surf back, but you kept swimming and you swam all the way to the neighboring Isle of White, which I believe is somewhere in the vicinity of Scotland. And that is quite a prank. You should have seen the looks on their faces, which you couldn't because you were some miles away. Anywhere from a couple of miles up to hundreds of thousands of miles depending on how good or bad my geography is. Anyhow, thank you so much, Scott McFarlane. Your support, and I don't mean this lightly, means a lot to us.

It really does. It means a whole bloody lot. Maybe that's enough for this week, just the three, because I'm only one man. You don't want to hear me just doing a bunch of these, rambling on. So we'll get back into that next week when the whole crew around my superior offices, Jessica.

And, I was going to call it Jessica Simpson, Jessica. What's her surname? Perkins and David Warnokey. I can't wait to see him again. I'm feeling a little lonely. The other last thing, actually, I was almost going to get out of here before my time because the last thing we're going to do is thank a couple of members,

welcoming them into the Triptitch Club. These Patreon supporters have been supporting us now for over three years. This is a couple to be entered into the club this week, and they are from Australia's capital city, Canberra, and Akasey, and also from Leeds in West Yorkshire, Isaac Smith, who we also thanked belatedly last week. So Isaac, geez, all your Christmas is have come at once, which is nice because it was around Christmas times, that does make some sense.

Thank you so much, Anna and Casey, or Anna Casey, and Isaac Smith, Anna and Casey, Isaac and Smith, you two, the body tops. And Dave've starting to say that he's not going to do it, but I'm going to hold him to it. He said he would put all the trip ditch members on a plaque thing on our website, maybe in gold writing, maybe not, but you know, probably in a relatively fancy font. Anyhow, I can imagine you are not enjoying me, Anyhow, I can imagine you are not enjoying me drawing on, so I will wrap it up now.

Thank you so much for joining us again. I hope you enjoyed that episode. We will be back again next week with another fun, bloody time, and I can't wait. For one, I for one, cannot wait. And we look forward to seeing you then, if you wanna get in contact us with us, you can do via do go on pod on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram.

And you can also email us at do go on pod at gmail.com. And you can also just look at your window longingly and imagine we're there in the middle distance, either in all of those options of Bible. But until next week, I will say goodbye and later! This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit Planet Broadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mateses. I mean, if you won't, it's up to you. This episode is brought to you by Progressive. Most of you aren't just listening right now.

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