Do Go On - 255 - The Transy Book Heist

Episode Date: September 9, 2020

On the 17th of December, 2004, Transylvania University librarian Betty Jean Gooch was waiting for her meeting with a man named Walter Beckman - within hours, a crime was committed that is now listed among the F.B.I.’s all-time most significant art-theft cases... it was also one of the most bungled. Listen to hear what went down!Support the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: patreon.com/DoGoOnPodBuy tickets to our streamed shows (there are 8 available to watch now! All with exclusive extra sections): https://sospresents.com/authors/dogoonCheck out our web series: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2TuMQ31VXvqqEus9Bo6FZW-dDY5ukEuh Submit a topic idea directly to the hat: dogoonpod.com/Submit-a-TopicTwitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: [e-mail] out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader ThomasREFERENCES AND FURTHER READING:https://www.vanityfair.com/magazine/2015/02/transy-book-heisthttps://web.archive.org/web/20110210225111/http://transy.edu/about/name.htmhttps://people.com/movies/true-story-behind-american-animals/https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_Animalshttps://www.kentucky.com/news/local/crime/article212180224.html

Melbourne and Canada, we got exciting news for you. And we should also say this is 2026. Jess, what year is it? 2026. Thank God you're here. Right now, I'm in Melbourne doing my show with Serenji Amarna, 630 each night at the Cooper's Inn Hotel, having so much fun. We'd love to see you there.

Canada, we are visiting you in September this year. If you've somehow missed the news, we are heading up Vancouver, Calgary, Montreal, and Toronto for shows. That's going to be so much fun. Tickets for all this stuff, I believe, are online. And I'm here too. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates.

Welcome to another episode of Do Go On. My name is Dave Warnikey and as always I'm here with Matt Stewart and Jess Perkins. We're here. Oh, hello. I genuinely just stopped for a second and be like, oh no, this is where I meant to talk. Wow, I can't believe that was going to be the record of me fucking this show up, do you think? time-wise. Seven seconds in.

I forgot how to do a podcast. He's that good. Well, luckily, Matt, you're in charge today of the report, so it's not like you'll have to have too much input on this episode. Okay, great. Can have a timeout at any time if you want. All right. Well, I think I've already used that token up.

I really want to just get straight into it because it's a longish one. Are you guys up for just kicking in? Yeah. Cracking on? Hell yeah. Rolling up the sleeves. Let's get stuck in. Get stock in.

How does this show work again, Jess? Well, how this show works is that one of us, and there's three of us, we take it in turns to research a topic and we read lots of articles about it and we watch documentaries and we write a little report about it. We bring it back to the other two who respectfully listen the entire time. Oh, that's the best bit. And this week, it's Matt's turn for us to respectfully listen to him and not interrupt or make any silly jokes.

And we usually get onto topic with a question, Matt. We do. I think people, if there's one thing people tune in for, it's the respect. Yes, absolutely. And the friendship. Yes. The respectful friendship. Yeah, we're so respectfully friendly.

So the question this week to get us on the topic is, where is Transylvania University located? Okay. This feels like a trick question. Question. Transylvania, I believe, is in the place, is now Romania. That's true. Do they have a university there?

And this is, in fact, a double trick question. I'm going to say Pennsylvania. Oh, Jess is closer. It's Lexington, Kentucky. Hey, we would have got there eventually. I don't think I would. So this is from the university website. It explains not that Transylvania.

Good, this is a good start. I love this already. It says, Our Transylvania is a friendly, top-notch liberal arts college located in Kentucky's beautiful bluegrass region, not the region that many people associate with dark castles and legends of vampires in Romania. Even so, we have fun with our name. Their mascot is definitely some sort of Dracula, isn't it? Oh, I haven't looked that up. I hope so, surely.

It's just a drop of blood. It's a little blood droplet dancing around. I want to suck your blood. Nah, just kidding. Come in and study science with us. We'll teach you how to take blood. Apparently, Transylvania is a Latin word meaning across the woods. The heavily forested territory of Western Virginia that became Kentucky in 1792 was originally

called Transylvania. And it became our name when the college was founded in 1780, which is, I believe, Dave, you're a bookman. That's well before Dracula and Transylvania was written by Ram Stoker. Yeah, yeah, that would be beforehand, 100 odd years. Wow. Yeah, I think that's about right, 100-ish years. So they're like, yeah, I imagine maybe they wouldn't have picked it otherwise. And finally it says, our nickname is Transi, which reflects the congenial spirit of our campus. Okay. Okay. Don't you think that just really reflects the congenial spirit?

Yeah, it does sound congenial. Yeah, big time. Yeah, a word I use often and definitely know what it means. If I could award a university the miscongeniality ribbon or whatever, I'd give it to Transi. Yeah, big time. It's funny because it's like, that's totally what that university would be called in Australia. You'd call it Transi Uni, probably. Yeah, yeah.

And I'm like, oh yeah, everyone in the world does that. It's something you hear sometimes Australians talk about it when they're talking to people from overseas. They're like, yeah, we like to shorten words. I'm like, I don't think that's our thing. I think people around the world shorten words. I think we take it too far, but we're not the only ones who shorten things, of course.

It's like anybody else in the world named Michael has never been called Mike. Yeah. They're like, what do you mean? That's interesting. But we do, we go too far, I think. Think of an example. Servo.

That's too far. Arvo. Dameo. Yeah. The big three. You know? We put it all the end of things essentially. Yeah.

Well, that's true. Maybe we do more O's and America does more ease. Transi, yes. Dame E. So. Servi. God the survey. Today's episode is about a particular.

event at the Transylvania University, the Transylvania or Trancie book heist. A book heist. A book heist. I love a heist. Dave loves books. I know. Wow. I mean, this is the perfect cross-section.

The perfect crime. This was suggested by Colin Salvatore Cattaldo from Florida in the United States. Santiago Lopez from Whittier in Canada and Max Edwards from Bristol in somewhere. I'm not sure where he didn't say. probably England. Probably, but there could be other bristles. There's got to be other bristles. Surely.

I call it Bristow. Anyway, on the 17th of December, 2004, in the library at the Transylvania University in Lexington, Kentucky, librarian Betty Jean Gooch was waiting for her meeting with a man named Walter Beckman. Betty Jean Gooch. Betty Jean Gooch, fantastic, man. Betty Jean, fantastic. And would go with nearly any service. her name, but Gooch is fantastic.

Oh, yeah. I think she's easily my, my favourite person in this whole story. Will you refer to her as B.J. Gouch? Yes, that is her nickname, and that does come up shortly. B.J. Gouch. And she was meeting who?

Because he had a good name, too. Walter Beckman. Walter Beckman. Love that. He sounds like a businessman from the 1930s. Oh, I was going to say he sounds like he's written one of, you know, the Great American novels or something. Yeah, either the Great American novel or he's, he makes the

great American box chocolates. Yeah, yeah, Walter Beckman's boxer chocolates. They weren't so good with naming shit back then, even though they had all the options. They liked to keep it very clear. What was on the box? That's what they did. And it was chocolates. It was a box of chocolates.

Yeah. You know, here we'd call it, you know, Beckman's chockies or something. Yeah, boxo chockies. Yeah. But, you know, that's just what we're like here. What we like. It's a cultural thing. Yeah, you wouldn't understand.

So you might remember Lexington, Kentucky from another oddball crime story we did not too long ago? The Andrew Thornton and the Cocaine Bear episode. Ah, yes. That was also based around this place. Remember those two guys where the Kentucky, that weird Kentucky shop? Yes, yeah, yeah. That's in the area. Oh, in the mall.

If we ever get around to our US tour, I mean, Lexington's got to be on the map. Probably not for a show, but at least for a stopover. I think at this point our US tour is going to take us about a year. 50 states, 50 weeks. Yeah, 50 stops in every of the 50 states as well. Busy weeks, to be honest. We're moving over, okay. Gouge had never met Beckman previously.

Spoken him over the phone and he set up the appointment via a Yahoo email address. It was 2004 after all. Love that. Everyone communicated via Yahoo. Gooch was the guardian of the Transylvania Uni's special collections library. According to the Lexington Herald Leader, the collection sits above the first floor of the library in a glassed-in room that is always locked. It has its own stairway and is not visible from the library floor. Right.

I imagine when you said it's like it's on the first floor in a glass box. I thought it was like a floating room or something. Something that David Blaine might do a tricking. The collection included a folio edition of John James Audubon's Viva-Paris quadrupeds of North America and a double elephant folio of his Birds of America, a book the size of a small table, and as heavy as one too. Serious rare book collectors would have known the value. In 2000, a double elephant folio was sold at auction for $8.8 million.

Holy shit. Is double elephant, is that a size measurement? Yes, I think it's a big size measurement. A double, I've just written, yeah, just finished my first double element, guys turned it into the publisher last week. I think War and Peace might be a double elephant. That's a double, double elephant. Let me just double check.

The double elephant. That's the size. So, you know, A4 goes all the way up to double elephant. It's 678 millimeters by 1,016 millimeters. So over a metre tall. What? And you're meant to be able to read that? Yeah, well, I mean, it's a book of artwork as well.

So it's really, it's a, yeah, it's just like a strange old school way of displaying art. So it's kind of like it's a coffee table book that's bigger than your coffee table. Yeah, exactly. Well, it's the size of a big coffee table. You put legs on it, ready to go. Seinfeld, didn't Kramer come up with that idea on Seinfeld? The coffee table book of coffee tables. And it also is a coffee table.

Yeah. That is brilliant stuff. That is brilliant. That must have been made a reality at some point. So yeah, so 8.8 million. So that's just one of the items in this collection. So, and probably the most expensive one, but everything else is also worth thousands, tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands. Wow. I don't want that responsibility of being in charge of that. You don't want to be in BJ Gooch's shoes. God, no. Most of her she had smaller feet than me and it'll be very uncomfortable. Ow. She lovingly looked after this collection though and she took people through on tours.

Students from inside the university, but also outsiders could make appointments like Walter Beckman did. And she'd tour them around and explain everything that's going on. Wow. I've seen interviews with her. She just seems like a rad lady. When Beckman was setting up the meeting, he had requested to see Audubon's book, the one that's worth millions, as well as other items, including a first edition of Charles Darwin's on the Origin of Species, which you might know as it is the one that sets out his theory

on evolution, which is one of the things he's famous for, I think, Darwin. You heard his work on evolution? I've heard it, yeah. I've heard his podcast. I've subscribed, but I just haven't downloaded yet, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's sort of like, it's one you want for like a road trip. Yeah, for sure.

I can't listen while I'm doing something else, but it's perfect for road trips. It really keeps you awake. According to an article in Vanity Fair by John Falk, which I'll refer to a lot in this report, wearing a heavy coat, gloves and a wool cap, Beckman signed the visitor's log. With a long, thin face and bleached blonde hair and sideburns, he appeared younger than Gooch had expected. He was also less cordial and more agitated in person, asking Gooch soon after arriving if he could invite a friend along to see the books. She agreed. A few minutes later, a short, dark-haired

young man, also dressed in a winter coat, cap and gloves, entered the library. He said his name was John. The two men followed the librarian into the rare bookroom, and John closed the door behind them. As he was heading towards the display case, Goochfelder tingling on her right arm and collapsed to the floor. Oh my God. She's been bitten by a spider. Out of nowhere. While she's trying to give a tour, that would be so embarrassing. Oh, sorry, I'm going down. Oh, no, I know we've just met, but can you call an ambulance please? I'm so sorry.

Is that, do you think that's going to be an issue for people? I know I've just met, but would you mind just making a phone call to save my life? I just be more embarrassed if it wasn't someone I knew well. Yeah. You know, if I collapsed and it was you guys, I'd be like, oy, shitheads, call an ambulance, you know, because I'd, you know, we're casual like that. But people I don't know, and I'm trying to make a good impression, and now I'm vulnerable, and I'm tingling. I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm all, I'm okay, anyway, so right this way, thanks.

It wasn't a spider, unfortunately. No, it was Beckman who had taken her down. With what? With a stun pen, like a stun gun, yeah. But a pen? What? Yeah. Does that exist?

Wow. Apparently so. Wow. They've dressed very suspiciously, long coats, gloves and a hat. Yeah. Yeah. But no alarm bells were ringing until she was on the ground past hell. Well, I mean, she loves the books.

She just, she loves showing people the books. She sees all sorts of people all the time. Maybe she thought it was a bit weird. But, you know, your instincts, I don't think normally tell you. And she'd never had an issue before. I think something really fucked is about to happen. I think people just normally make things make sense in their mind because nearly always it isn't something crazy about to happen.

Yeah. That's me like, you know, trying to get inside their mind. But I feel like that's what I would have done. I'm like, oh, these guys are dressed warm, warmly. It's not that cold out. The leader continues. They took 20 pencil sketches drawn by Audubon for the Octavo edition of Birds of America.

The first edition, Darwin, a two-volume natural history from the 1500s called Autus Sanitatis, or Garden of Health, and illuminated manuscript from 1425 and the two large folios. You know, the two massive double elephant things. Oh, wow. Library director Susan Brown saw the men leaving, and according to affidavits, told them to stop. They had to get down the stairs when she saw them. They dropped the two folios.

They were so heavy that they were battling to get them out. Oh, because they were like a table. Yeah, clearly struggling to get them out. They dropped them, bailed on them. Easily the two most valuable parts of their heist. And they ran to a grey minivan where two other men waited and drove off. That's at least what Susan Brown thought. She thought they ran over to two other men.

I don't know if I'd stop for someone called Susan Brown either, you know. Maybe I'd stop to yawn. Susan Brown the head librarian I don't know I like it They quite They were specific about what they were going in for Like they knew what they weren't just grabbing anything You know

They knew what they wanted And they knew what they were looking for Yeah that's right But they did not anticipate how heavy the books would be No it sounds like that is the case Wow Can I just say it does seem a bit weird That there's two getaway drivers

And only two people going in When you need more people to carry shit that guy in the front seat and the passenger seat, he is a, I assume he is a waste of space. Yeah, he's useless. Well, so much so that he didn't exist. There wasn't actually two people in the minivan. There was only one driver.

But somehow she, yeah, that's what she told the police. She thought there was two. So that there was a team of four. So they've dropped both. Is there two of the big book? By dropping those two, their payday has taken a significant hit. And also, what are you going to do with it? It's got to be black mark.

Anyway, I'm sorry, you'll probably cover this kind of thing anyway. I will, I'm intrigued. I will cover all of that. But you're right. And something I forgot, I didn't write into the report, but I read elsewhere, Susan Brown, she was brave as. She chased them all the way to the van. She got so close that she keyed the van, apparently.

Whoa. And was lucky not to be run over by them. But she went after him. Good on you, Susan. You still have a shit name, but good on you. Within a few hours, the university had police officers everywhere. This included, as Falk describes, campus police, uniform lexicon police, plainclothes detectives and forensic teams,

as well as local news crews covering the developing transy book heists as it was becoming known, a crime that would one day be listed among the FBI's all-time, most significant art theft cases. Whoa. Yeah, it's amazing. It's a funny little haphazard-looking thing. where they didn't account for their weight of the main thing they were trying to steal,

but it was still, it still ranked as such a significant art theft. At this point, all the police had was very little to go on. There were no fingerprints, very few witnesses. What Susan Brown could tell them wasn't super helpful in terms of their appearance. There was no video camera surveillance. Right. The police were told they were looking for four Caucasian men in their early 20s. Gooch, still shaken by the incident, obviously.

Yeah, was she okay after the stunning? She was okay physically, relatively okay, but, you know, it was obviously very traumatic. Yeah, for sure. So soon after she was still shaken when she was talking to the police, and she described how she'd been struck by a taser-like weapon and that her hands and feet were bound with zip ties and her eyes were covered with a woolen hat.

Whoa. So this is a woman in her 50s, works in a library. You know, you're not, this would just come, you know, like to anyone this would come as a wild shock. But she's not working as a security guard in a vault or something, you know, where you'd be expecting such things. She just wants to show people cool books. I know.

Breaks your fucking heart. Yeah. One other detail stood out to her, though, and this is Dave sort of brought this up before, despite not recognizing the men, one of them called her BJ, which was a nickname only friends and colleagues used BJ short for Betty Jean. Uh-huh. But she remembered one of the men saying, quit struggling BJ, or do you want to feel more pain? That's weird.

Hmm. That's very weird. This is a bit of a clue that these guys must be somehow connected to the whole scene here, but not sure how exactly. The Lexington Police got their commercial burglary squad on the case. Police were on the lookout for the getaway vehicle, the grey minivan. Airports were notified and the FBI was also called in. But the thieves evaded capture, at least for nearly two months.

Oh. Here is their story told March part to journalist John Falk when he interviewed them at the Federal Correctional Institution in Ashland, Kentucky. Funnily enough, it was four men. The fourth man was on a roof, though. She wouldn't have been able to see him. But the four men were Warren Lipka, Spencer Reinhart, Eric Borsuk. Charles Allen the second.

No good names. No good names in that at all. I need to hear them again. Sorry, one more time. Warren Lipka. Ugh. Spencer Reinhardt. Eric Borsuch.

And Charles or Chaz Allen the second. Nah. Eric Borsuch is pretty good. Eric Borsack is probably the one. Sounds out a bit there. They're all kind of interesting looking, but they don't quite work, do they? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

They just don't have the X factor. That's all. They're fine names. I don't have a certain. I don't know how do you say it. I can't think of a phrase. I say a BJ Gooch about them. They are no BJ Gooch, that's for sure.

In any way, these guys are no BJ Gooch. I'll tell you that much. So these four men, they're all 1920, were college students who all grew up in the same Lexington neighborhood. They were former soccer teammates and were named in Kentucky's Allstate High School soccer team a couple of years prior. Spencer Ryan Hard and Warren Lipka grew up

together as neighbours in the south of Lexington. And according to Falk, in high school, Warren, a lanky six-footer with a mop of brown hair, was a popular jock and a class clown who delighted his classmates by bear hugging his nemesis, the dean of students for graduation. That crusty old dean. They got that crusty dean with a hug. We showed him. What a prank.

He hugged the principal. Yeah, in front of the crowd. That would have got him. He got you. But did he crush him or something? Yeah, and I just hugged him. Nat just said, he hugged him and said, thanks for all your support. And everyone was like, he fucking got him.

You got him. You put like a kick me sign on his back or something? Like, what's the prank? Dave, I don't think you get, Jess got it. It was a bear hug in front of everyone. He hugged him. Oh. So imagine, imagine, right?

Imagine. Matt's been bullying me for years, right? And then at our graduation, I just go up and I hug him. Yeah, that's good. Do you get it now? Yeah. It's very funny. I think I get it.

That's very funny. Sorry to use you as an example there, Matt. Obviously, that was just, that was not true. No, you'll never hug me. And I'd never hug you. Spencer, meanwhile, Spencer, who's Reinhardt, meanwhile, was a short, wiry, distant, and in many ways, Warren's opposite. it, an over-scheduled, over-achieving diamond-tipped drill of a kid who excelled at whatever

he set himself to. He focused above all on painting, gaining admission into prestigious Lexington Arts program. So that's how he got in to the uni. Very good at art. And drilling, it sounds like it. Oh, like, he was like a diamond-tip drill personified, whatever that means. I get it.

I love. Sounds like a compliment? Well, that's what the work of folk is so good in that way that sometimes you're not. exactly sure what he means, but you know what he means. You're reading between the lines. Yeah, he get the vibe, for sure. Despite the differing temperaments and the disapproval of Spencer's parents. So he refers to them by their first names a lot.

I'd do more of our classic surname thing. So Spencer is Reinhart, Warren is Lipka. Yep. The two were best of friends from the age of eight, a friendship that revolved largely around soccer. So, yeah, Spencer's parents apparently were not keen on this because Lipka was the class clown. Though they attended... Oh, you don't want your kid to be friends with a funny child.

You do not want that. Get in with the wrong crowd. Yuck. Oh, the class clown, you say. Makes everyone laugh, does he? Not in my house, he doesn't. Probably from a slightly less good area of this very wealthy area. Yeah.

Yeah, I think we talked about it on the cocaine bear episode, but this area is like, it's a lot of, you know, horse country. Right, okay. A lot of horses. Horses are in charge? Horses are in charge. Yeah, horses is a horse. It's actually, yeah, Bojack Horson is based on Lexington, Kentucky.

Yeah. Uncredited. The mayor is called Buttercup. Yeah. And all the police are Clydesdales. Whoa. They're big, they're big, big, big scary horses. So they attended different high schools.

but both were varsity captains, both made all state in their soccer teams, or for the state soccer team. In their senior year, the two became local celebrities after a dramatic photo appeared in the Lexington Herald leader showing Lexington Catholic star goalkeeper Lipka and Tate's Creek forward,

Reinhardt battling mid-aird during a playoff game. They became local celebrities because of a photo showing them playing soccer. Whoa. So there's a lot going on in the town. Hey, you're that soccer kid. Whoa. Oh, that's the other soccer kid.

Whoa, you guys know each other in real life? Whoa. I can't wait to tell my mom. Quick, do the photo. Do the photo now. Do it. Reenact the photo. Do the thing.

Do the thing. Okay. I like to think that folk isn't just exaggerating. And they literally did start doing like you know, chat shows and stuff. Yeah, yeah. They had a booth at all the finest clubs. They're getting free food from the bakery.

In the autumn of 2003, Spencer Ryanhart was accepted into Transylvania uni on an art scholarship, and Warren Lipka was accepted at the University of Kentucky on a full athletic scholarship. The two universities were within a couple of kilometers of each other. So if they wanted to, they could still hang out and that sort of stuff. So we got Lipka, class clown, lanky, goalkeeper, that's not so relevant.

And you got Ryan Hart, quieter, arty friend. He got the scholarship. Yeah, with the scholarship. They've actually both got scholarships. They've both got scholarships. Yeah, just for different things. Yeah, one for sport, one for art. I mean, you know, yin and yang, isn't it?

Yeah. Imagine liking both. That doesn't make sense. That doesn't make sense. Ryanhard was keen on a career in graphic design, and Lipka had vague ambitions to enter politics, apparently. But neither had a great time at uni, with Reinhardt telling folk,

in all my art classes, I was the only guy, in with a bunch of girls who didn't have any idea what they wanted to do. All these girls I could draw better than when I was in sixth grade. Oh, yuck. Okay. You suck. Oh, I'm a young, I'm a teenage boy, and I'm in a class surrounded by girls.

What a nightmare. That sounds absolutely awful and that is the exact reason that I enrolled in drama. Yeah, I was just thinking that. You would have been one of few boys in your course, I'm guessing, Dave. Yeah, you goddamn right and it was very fun. And I could draw better than all of them. Yeah, were you around girls that you could act better with when you were like six? Yeah, I've been doing a family tap and ballet shows for my family since I was six.

So I'm very advanced. These interviews with Falk are not too long after the high. So they're still in their early 20s. And I think I've seen interviews with them into their 30s. And they do seem like better than that. Like at least right. They've matured. Ryanhard does just come across much better in the interview I saw with him when he was 30 than this one.

Because that line just sounds like an idiot. But it sounds like a very young man. You know, like, yeah, it sounds kind of appropriate for the age he is when he's saying it. But it's still fun to take the piss off. Oh, no doubt. But yes, it definitely makes, yeah, you kind of go, yeah, you're a young dickhead. Yeah. You're still figuring yourself out.

Which is totally true. And that is something that I do. Like in my head, I'm picturing these guys who are planning this house. I'm thinking, I'm picturing them being like a bit older than that. But it's so weird to think of 19, 20-year-olds doing something this. full on, which is patronising, I suppose. Kids can make huge mistakes too. Yeah.

In fact, they often do, because they don't think consequences through quite as much. So Reinhart wasn't enjoying his arts class with all these girls who... Who couldn't draw, which obviously impacts him. Yeah. You know, because he can draw very well. So he's getting good marks. But all these girls are doing terribly, and it's impacting me. Me.

How? Was there a group assignment where he's the one going, come on, let's get our heads in the game. We're going to draw this picture. Come on, girls, let's draw some flowers. You love your little flowers. The Lipka, on the other hand, the class clown, he was also going through a tough time early in uni.

His parents were getting divorced, and that was, you know, they were parents were not getting on. He wasn't really getting on with his parents. His mum was soon to kick him out of home. and according to Falk, when not at soccer practice, he spent his time smoking pot, watching Comedy Central, and reading German philosophy. The big three.

Lipker quit the University of Kentucky soccer team in his freshman year, meaning he forfeited his scholarship, though he remained enrolled, sort of, but now he didn't have a way to pay for it, so that didn't last too long. Around this time, He met someone a shady type of figure who was earning good money in identity theft and making fake IDs. And he recruited Lipka to start selling fake IDs for him in the university dorm rooms.

Then Lipka sort of went out on his own a little bit. He recruited another freshman, his old high school soccer teammate Eric Borsak to work with him. Borsak, please. Call him his right now. Okay, Borsak. Borsak. Borsuk would provide more of the technical help. He had the relevant software and equipment and would mock up the IDs. Lipker, I think, was more of the, you know, he was the salesman and the, the,

he had the gift of the gab, so to speak. By the end of the year, they were making money selling these fake IDs for a hundred bucks a piece, as well as offering other similar identity tweaking services, which they didn't go into the details of, because I guess they were never busted for it, and they didn't want to give it away. The two made great money together until an argument over cash split up the partnership. This left Lipka's dodgy business in tatters without Borsick's technical know-how. Yeah, money always gets between friends.

Yeah, apparently two grand went missing from a drawer. Okay, that's a fair amount. Yeah. Yep. So this is when Lipka reconnected with his old mate, Reinhart, who had the graphic design skills. Did either of you ever have fake IDs? A couple of times to get into over 18 concerts, use my sister's friend's ID who had the same hair cut as me. I thought you were going to say your sisters.

And I was like, no, Dave, I don't think anyone was buying that. Your sister's friend. Okay. Yeah, but to get into gigs, that's cute. Yeah. I never did. I never really wanted to. But also, it's less of a thing here because we can drink at 18 anyway.

Yeah. You know, if you're already at college but you can't drink until you're 21, fucking everyone should have a fake idea. Yeah, you get them when you enrol. Yeah, you get your student ID, you get your key to your locker. I thought everyone's got a locker and here's your fake ID. Here's our seven passports for different countries, the different names. Memorise them.

And $1,000 in five different currencies. Man, I love when like Jason Bourne agent types open up like a little suitcase and there's like all this different coloured money and passports. Love that. I was watching a video the other day. There's this, I think it's wired to do a series of an accent coach who picks apart different performances of accents. And I love him. I love that.

And they did another one recently with a woman who used to be in charge of disguises at the CIA. And so she's sort of going with like plot points in movies and TV shows and stuff. And in like that scenario, she's like, there's no magic box of passport. Like they take their painstaking to make and we don't just sort of have them in bulk and you don't just have a safety deposit box full of cash. And I was like, oh, you're ruining the illusion. But I mean, that is why I'm watching the video to ruin the illusions. I mean, but where are you getting your passport from them?

Your fake passport or they don't get it. No, if you have to have one, they make it like for that case and then it's probably destroyed or something. It's all made to order, Dave. Yeah, it's made to order. There's not a warehouse somewhere. I'd say it. Yeah, you don't just have some stockpiled and you're like, oh yeah, who will I be today?

It sounds to me like she's trying to throw us off the sand. Yes, Dave, 100%. Yeah, there's several lockers full of passports. I know there is. I'd choose to believe there is. So Lipka lost his business partner in Borsick. And this is when he decided to reconnect with Ryan Hart, with the graphic design skills and the artistic skills.

The two had drifted apart slightly. since the beginning of the school year. They were attending the different universities. They were nearly two kilometers apart. Pretty insurmountable sort of barriers in between their friendship. How would you even travel 2Ks? I don't know, unless there's a bus. Is there a bus or something they could get or like a...

I looked up on Google Maps. It estimates it as a 23-minute walk. Oh, no, you couldn't. You couldn't do it. Oh, that's sad. Yeah, no friendship is worth that. Sad to drift apart for a 20-minute walk. And that really sounds like they could have used each other's support

because they were individually hating school. Yeah. Maybe that would have been good to talk to each other. And I guess that's what happened because when they reconnected and Lipka suggested getting involved in this fake ID business, Reinhard jumped at the opportunity. When the two were hanging...

Did he jump up and reenact that photo? Yes. The goalkeeper. They said one last time. Because obviously there was a crowd milling about. Hey, it's the soccer guy. I thought they'd never be together again. So when the two were hanging around together,

Reinhard let Lipka know about an orientation tour of the Transi campus that freshmen undertook, which took in their library's collection of rare books and manuscripts. He told them of the John James Audubon work, and how they were told on that tour that another copy of it sold for millions of dollars. 8.8 million, to be exact. Although I think Reinhart remembered it as 12 million.

He's already disappointed with eight. Yeah, that's true. Only 8 million. I'm broke. Oh, throws it in the bin. Lipker, as they discussed, Lipka wondered to Reinhart, what kind of security is around the collection?

Oh, boy. And according to Falk, between studying for his first semester's finals, working out and painting, Ryan Hart made time to scope out the special collection section of the Transi Library, reporting back to Warren Lipka, weeks later, that there was zero security other than an old lady named BJ and having to sign a fucking book. That's a quote. I'm honestly not sure. BJ's in her like 50s, isn't she?

Yeah, I know. She's not an old lady at all. I guess to a 20-year-old maybe. kids these days. To me, she's a youngster. Yeah. By hitting the ball back into Warren's court, Lipka's court, Reinhardt thought he would keep that thrilling flicker of criminality burning for a bit longer,

while fully expecting there to be an insurmountable obstacle somewhere down the road. Even if they did steal the books, for example, how would they ever sell them? I love that he's looking for an insurmountable obstacle for this big heist, but he's so good of finding insurmountable obstacles. nearly two kilometers walk. Yeah, I'm poor. But he underestimated his mate, as Lipka was busy working out how to make it all happen.

He'd been in contact with his shady figure friend who gave him the fake idea idea in the first place and inquired about how he might be able to sell some rare artwork and his contact hooked him up with a guy in New York. Falk explains, after several phone calls, Warren managed to arrange a meeting in New York. The contact, who identified himself only as Barry, stipulated that Lipka had to bring $500 in good faith money.

Late one Thursday afternoon in mid-February, the two friends bought a bag of weed and drove the 700 miles to Manhattan in Reinhardt's Acura Legend. It's about a 12-hour drive. They checked into the Hilton Hotel in Midtown, with Lipka signing in under Harry Balsani, a name backed up with one of their fake Kentucky driver's licenses, and they paid in cash. having seen their fair share of heist movies, they knew how dangerous it was to leave a paper trail. The meeting was scheduled for the next morning on the southern edge of Central Park near the Plaza Hotel. Barry described himself as an older man with a long ponytail and said he'd be wearing a green

scarf. The meeting initially hit a snag. I mean, he's already pretty distinct looking. An old man with a ponytail, but just in case, I'll be wearing a scarf. He gets there and there's all these old men with ponytails in multicolored. scarves. Three different shades of green. Which shade? What do you say? Which shade of green? Is it emerald? Lime? Is it lime? The meeting initially hit a snag when Barry was put off by the boy's youth. But he said he put on a deeper voice and after an awkward back and forth,

Lipka finally handed the man the $500. In exchange, Barry slipped him an email address with instructions to sign off any communication with the name Terry. So he met him and he's like, oh, hello, sir, I'm the guy. And the guy's like, you're a bit of a kid. And then he's like, oh, I mean, hello. Oh, nice to meet you. Sorry, I had a little frog in my throat just before, but here's, here I am a normal man. I'm a big boy.

I mean, I mean, a little man. I mean a normal man. I don't need my mummy to cut off the crusts on my sandwiches. Not anymore. I cut my own crusts. So is that sort of what you meant that? He put on a deep voice after the guy. That's what it sounds like.

Or at the very least, the guy sort of looked at him like, oh, you're a bit young. Before he'd said anything, maybe. And he went, oh, now I'll put on the deep voice. No, no, don't worry about me. So this is before they've done anything. They've just gone to met someone and given him $500. Yeah.

These kids are fucking idiots. And then that means they've got his email now. So if they ever want to sell anything, they just have to email this email and say, love Terry. Yeah. Well, they don't have to. They can say love Terry.

They could say regards, Terry, kind regards Terry, cheers. Fuck off Terry. Yeah. Well, that'd be a roll of us. No, fuck you, Terry. So they've paid $500 to get a man's email address.

Good faith money. Is that a refundable deposit? I don't believe it is. If we don't sell any artwork through you, will I get my $500 back? I think it's the kind of thing where they gave them the money. And if you had a second thought about it, is actually the goal of it to say,

said, what money? That kind of scenario. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They drove back to Lexington and set up a Yahoo email account, and as instructed, sent off an email to the address Barry slipped them. In it, they said they had some rare books to sell and signed it off as Terry. So far, so good. Perfect. Then they played the waiting game.

Ah, yes. But the waiting game sucks, so they played hungry, hungry hippos. Great game. A week later, they received a reply. It said if they wanted to sell books, they'd have to do it in person, which was fine. Only problem, in person meant Amsterdam. Okay. So the ponytail man, he left that detail out that this email he was giving him was for some book buyers in the Netherlands.

Great. Right. Okay. So these kids who don't have a lot of money, one of whom's just lost his scholarship, so obviously they're looking for some cash. They've just spent $500 to get an email address. They stayed at the Hilton, paid in cash, and bought a big old bag of weed beforehand as well,

which can't have been all that cheap. And now they need to steal these things and somehow get them to Amsterdam, which I would assume would be flying to Amsterdam because you're not just going to post it, are you? Yeah, that's right. And then how are you going to pack it and fly to Amsterdam? This is a bad plan. Yeah.

That's just my take early on. Well, let's see how it ends up. this could all end up really well. They're probably still living it up in the Caribbean, which was one of their plans if they, if it all came off. What are you mean? You're just going to fuck off to the Caribbean?

Yeah. What? I would. You're like 20 and you don't explain to your mum why you've moved to the Caribbean and never coming back. Oh boy. This is dumb.

Anyway, they were excited by the response that they had to go to Amsterdam until it dawned on them that they would have to travel with a passport. And their rule was, let's not leave a paper trail. And that gets hard with a passport. I mean, they've already left a digital trail by emailing this dude. But from a made-up email address, you know, it can't be connected back to them. They sent the email from a public computer and that sort of stuff.

Okay, that's, all right, that's good. So they've been pretty clever about it so far, you know, in some ways, I guess. Jess has also picked a few holes. Why are you defending them? They have made some pretty good decisions, I think. You've read the whole thing. You know how this ends. And you're going, no, no, but good on them.

Well, some of the dumber things they do are yet to come. Okay. So I'm like, oh, you're picking at these things. Just do you wait? I can't. I can't wait. So, yeah, so they realized that they were. were going to have to probably get a fake passport.

And to Reinhart, they're like, this is the insurmountable problem. We've had fun, dreaming about this, but we're done now. Of course, Lipka was undeterred. He again went to his shady mentor, mate, and he let them know that he needed to leave the country, and they needed the documentation to do it. He said that they had the skills to make fake licenses, but a passport was a little bit of a stretch for them. So they were told to wait a couple of days, and it would cost them two and a half

grand each. To cut costs, they decided only Lipka would go. And it was as easy as that. They got their passport and return flights a few days later. And Reinhart drove Lipka to the airport. And Falk takes up the story from here. Lipka touched down at Amsterdam's Shriphole airport on a Saturday morning in early March 2004. He took a cab to the dam square, an old hippie hangout in the centre of the city he'd read about on the internet. He scored a joint before checking into a hole in the wall and falling asleep. First thing you do in Amsterdam, you don't check in, you go straight. Hello, can I have some marijuana place?

And they're like, yeah, all right. They would do that on the pillows, like instead of after-dinner mince at the hotel. Just a little joint? After-dinner joint, love it. I've got a menu. Is this post... Is this post heist? Like he's already got the book and he's already flying down.

No, no, this is all pre. We haven't got up to that. So is this to set up a meeting or something? Like, why is he going early? Yeah, this is for a meeting. Right. What? But he's also playing it like he's got the books.

So he's just making sure before they go through the heist that he has a way of selling them. It is kind of clever, you know, I think. Clever, but also you're dealing with some pretty serious people and telling him you've got something that you don't. Yeah, exactly. And you're spending money you don't have to fly there as well. Oh, but it'll be easily covered by the $8.8.

Yeah, yeah, I'll be reimbursed. For the big, heavy books I'll definitely be able to carry and others. Far out. Also, I didn't think that the passport was going to work and it obviously has. Can you still get a passport for, like a fake one for $2,000? Yeah, that feels like a bargain, right? I guess mates rates used to work with him. Yeah.

Like, do they actually, I didn't think you could actually fake a passport like that. How naive of me ever since just. told me about the Jason Bourne video. My first passport I got in around that time, and it was definitely more primitive than the ones now. It didn't have the chip in it, and it didn't have all sorts of things. So I imagine it would be way harder to do now.

Yeah, of course. But 2004, maybe that was right at the end of this being possible. Wow. Yeah. But I'm no passport expert. I should put that on the table. Thank you. Thank you for terrifying.

I did have follow-up passport-related questions, but I will leave them. Eyes have to be open. No, glass. glasses or hat in the photo. I look like, I can't, mine expires next year, I'm so happy because it's a dog shit photo.

I think that's the rule. It has to be a dog shit photo. You can't look good. You can't. If you look good in that, then. I mean, Dave probably does. Dave looks good. Well, I had, by my first attempt was rejected

because I went to an old man at a chemist who looked like he was older than photography was. He was so old. That's old. And he's standing there shaking his hand while he's like, taking the photo. He printed it out. I thought I looked quite good.

I was like, mate, thanks so much. You've really gone above and beyond. You've really captured my essence. Yeah, thank you so much. Yeah, I shouldn't have questioned your methods. You obviously what you're doing. Well, then when I send it to the passport office, a few days later, they got back to me saying that it wasn't good enough quality

that the photo wasn't good. So I had to go and you're like, no, God, that's my head. No. And then I came back. Basically, I think their problem was that I looked too hot. Yeah. That was their problem? They hate that.

Yeah, the very insensitive. secure the people at the passport head office. Very insecure. Oh, check out this dull face. Check out this hotie. You definitely, there's no reason you can't smile. They're just like, just don't let them. Surely it's more information of anything.

You know, you're showing your teeth. Yeah, I've got them. I've got all my teeth. Yeah, that's right. When you die, they always check your bloody dental records for matching, don't they? Yeah. I've been, from TV, I've seen, yeah. Yeah, well, I watched a wide video that debunked that.

Where do they get dental? records from though. What does that mean? They check your dental records. Yeah, I think the dentist keeps records. I mean, I got an x-ray of my teeth last month. That'll be on file somewhere. Right.

So they just sort of, they would go, well, this body still has its wisdom teeth. And we can see that Jess had hers out so it can't be hurt. Or the killer somehow put them back in. Gross. Whoa. And honestly, they were causing pain. They were causing pain. don't want them back in there.

Serial killer, okay? There's a reason I had them surgically removed. Ow, stop. This hurts. Oh, my God, I'm so sorry. Oh, sorry. Oh, so sorry. That did get the cops off the scent, though.

So, you know, in essence, quite a wise move by the killers. Yeah, interesting, interesting. But he accidentally puts the left hand side on the right hand side, and that's how they know. And they're like, well, this could be not many people. How many people are born with their left hand? wisdom tooth on the right-hand side. How did we get on to this? I'm trying it was passports.

Oh yeah, fake passport. Yes. He's in Amsterdam. So he's in Amsterdam. He's at a joint going to bed. The next morning, this is still folk. The next morning, all nerves, he left for the meeting site. A cafe within walking distance.

Probably needs another joint then. Yeah. Well, he's going to a cafe. I think they'd probably sort him out there. Cafe with a K. They'll sort him out. He was told to look for a bearded, heavy-set man in a solid blue sweater.

When Warren arrived... What color scarf? No scarf. So that was... He should have just said, I'm the guy without a scarf. Everyone else. Got all these different shades of green scarves on. Trust me.

Everyone had I said, got a scarf. I'll really stand out. So when Lipka arrived, he saw a man fitting that description seated with three other men. He's like, oh, that wasn't part of the plan. Undeterred, he introduced himself as Terry, firmly shaking hands before sitting down. like Barry, which I'm starting to think wasn't even that guy's real name. No. Like Barry, the men were immediately put off by Warren's youth, Lipka's youth,

and even more so by the fact that he hadn't brought any of the books with him. They're like, what's this meaning for? I thought you're going to sell us some books? He also didn't have any photos of the books, nor photocopies, documentation of any kind, or even the slightest of bit to intelligently discuss the books. Oh, well, I've given you a list of names of books. What more do you need to know? So he hasn't done any research on them at all.

They knew he was wrong when he couldn't pronounce the author's name. Well, him and me both. And, you know, one of those big epholump folders. Effolum. It's a double ephalum. It's a double efflump. So can I have $8 million now, please? You give me the money first.

And I'll send the books. You give me the money now. It's a show of good face. faith. The meeting lasted no more than 15 minutes. Long flight over. That's not good. That's not good. But still, it was a turning point because the men explained to Warren, Lippka, that a crucial step of selling the books, stolen or otherwise, is that it needed to be appraised by a legitimate auction house. That's something he didn't realize. He's like, I thought I'd just sell it to him, but even dodgy buyers, and they're like, if you can do that step, and I think they were probably thinking, he's not going to do that set. We'll never hear from this guy again. he's full of shit. But they said if you can do that, then you got yourself a buyer.

So he's like, sick, one step closer. I'm fascinated by the ethics of the auction house. Because if somebody comes in with books like that, you'd be like, and they're like a 20-year-old, you'd be like, oh, you've obtained these in a not-so-good way. So what are you supposed to do? Just appraise them and go about you. Like, what are you supposed to? What's the ethics there?

Well, we'll get to talk about that soon. Oh, man. Sorry. No, I love it. Love how your brain works, Bob. Yeah, I've had three hours sleep. Hey, Bob, your brain is your value. Thank you.

Sorry, if that was a bit, if that was a bit off. No, it was just a bit touching, a little bit unexpected. I needed to hear that today. Bit rude to her heart, but anyway. Oh, yeah. It knows what it did. My heart's no good. So now they knew, all that to do is get the books, get them appraised, get them,

then smuggle them out of the country to Amsterdam, and then they could sell them. So they were feeling good. Things were happening. What? I mean, honestly, they're the same steps away from success as we are, away from success for this plane. Yes. But now they and we both know. are the steps. They didn't even know the steps first.

Dave, they walked so we could run. I know, that's right. You know, now we know. We know the steps. Don't go to Amsterdam without the stuff to sell. Or at least some pickies of it, you know? Or a vague idea about them. Yes, no, what it is you plan to steal. Yes. Do you reckon as he walked away from the meeting, the three men were just laughing about him? Like, what a fucking idiot.

Yeah. Or, yeah, I wonder, depending on the kind of character, because they were, they're either laughing or they're going, should we take him out? I don't like that he knows who we are. They did not expect to ever hear from him again. No, I don't reckon. So when Lipka returned to tell Reinhart the good news, they were excited.

What good news is? Something that they thought would be difficult to find for stolen books worth millions of dollars. But they found it. They found a buyer. So that was really, that was, you know, ticking off one box. It just created a new box or two that they had to tick now. They had to get them appraised. And like I say, they also had to get them.

Yeah. That feels like a big tick. That is one of the biggest boxes, I reckon. You're going to need a real thick mark and to tick that box. Lipka got straight into researching online and he settled on Christie's in New York. No.

The number one Google result. He's like, well, this seems fine. Probably the most famous and notable option house in the world, right? There's Christie's London, Christie's New York. It's an old, ever like, I don't know anything about this world and I've heard of Christie. Oh my God. So the plan is to go to Christie's, get them appraised and then say, oh, sorry, I'm not going to sell them here. I'm going to take them away now and then take them to answer them.

Wow. So this is what they thought. they thought, a couple of freshmen wander in to Christie's in New York and not raise any eyebrows. So, Reinhart is sort of like, he's, Warren Lipka is like, he's a wild man, all in, gets excited, doesn't necessarily think things through all that much. Ryan Hart's a little bit more contemplative and, but still gets dragged along by his mate. Can I just quickly to say, so is Lipka, is he the one that the parents were like, I don't want you to be friends.

Right arts parents. They were right. Yeah, they probably were a bit right. They were right 15 years old. Okay. Honestly, your parents usually are. My best friend, and I say that in inverted commas, in primary school, by the time we got to grade four, my mum had a chat to the teachers and said,

can you put them in different classes next year? And then I was very sad that me and my friend weren't in the same class anymore. But then weirdly, I started to enjoy school a little more. and do a little better. And turns out she was just a bully. Oh, my God. Wow. And mum was like, she's not too good for you.

So your parents are often right about this stuff. Oh, that's so good. Cheers, Mom. Good on your mind. Annie, what a lady. That's the best lady. Sorry, I just get really emotional again today. She actually reminds me a little bit of BJ Gooch.

Oh, same kind of vibe. Although, Dave, your mum's the librarian, right? Yeah, that's right. So maybe My mom loves books Maybe BJ Gooch is all of our mums Yeah Now I'm even more protective of her

I would kill for any of our mums Yeah I reckon I would Thanks Jess I'd take a bullet Wow you'd kill or be killed for any of our mums I wouldn't die

Oh you'd take a bullet To the shoulder or something Hopefully I mean If my aim is good But I'm directing my body In front of the bullet Not the heart.

And shoulder. Right arm, thank you. You're like you're seeing the bullet mid-air. Is that what you think? And choosing not to avoid the bullet, you're putting your shoulder into it. Yeah, yeah. Well, I'm telling, you know, if I have the choice of moving so that it doesn't hit my heart or something or an organ, but maybe grazes my arm but saves a mum.

Yeah. Okay. I regret bringing up. I lose an arm, but I save a mum. Beautiful. That's beautiful. Wow. Anyway, later recounting to folk, Brian Hart said,

and this is of the idea, Lipka's idea of Diana Christie's, I was kind of skeptical, but the way I rationalised it was, it's the biggest auction house. If we go in there, they're not going to suspect that we stole these, because no one would go to Christie's with stolen books to get them appraised. It's so dumb that they'd be like, well, this is so dumb.

I mean, come on. Who's this? It's the hiding in plain sight kind of idea, which is my favourite way to hide. But yeah, this is, he goes on to say, that's how we did a lot of stuff. Like, we would smoke weed directly under the security camera on the Transi campus, park a car right underneath it and then smoke for like an hour. We figured the more obvious we were, the less likely we would be suspected. Okay.

I don't like these boys. I don't. I understand they've grown into men. now and they're maybe a little more mature. But still, I don't like them. Yeah, well, you know, they're more mature. They're coming from a certain level. But, you know, I'm trying not to be too judgmentally the way.

But yeah, if they didn't fuck up BJ Gooch, I think, you know, it would all feel pretty harmless. But unfortunately, they traumatise an innocent woman at the heart of all this. And so it makes it, every time I start to think, I'm like, you know, they're just dumb boys. It's like, oh, it's a pretty, you know, it's tricky. You don't want to like go, you made a dumb mistake early in your life. You should be hated forever.

But you're also like, I mean, you did kind of make this woman's life a lot harder. And there's no point to what they're trying to do. You know, it's just for shits and gigs. That I don't like either. Well, something they talk about a lot is that it's, they're trying to, they feel like their lives are mundane and they're trying to break out from that and try to do something. Gooch explains it pretty well in a film that she's briefly interviewed in.

She says they wanted to do something extraordinary, but they didn't want to work for it. I mean, it's so much work, but it's still like somehow doing it the easy way, but it's so much ridiculous work at the same time. It's not easy at all. You hear these stories off and you go, imagine if you put all this effort into something more positive. Yeah, imagine if you just, like, were nice to the dumb girls in your art class. Maybe you could make some connections and, you know, just connect with other humans. Maybe you could just travel.

You've already flown to Amsterdam. Just have a look around. You know, you don't have to steal some art for it. Matt, you stay neutral, but I'm going to judge the crap out of that. That's all right. I think that they're great young men. Yes. I mean, what's better?

A book being locked up in some sort of glass cabinet, or should it be free to be sold to some guy in Amsterdam? Like the birds depicted in it. Send them free, let it fly. And then I would assume that man in Amsterdam is going to free the book back into its natural habit. A library. Be free, throws it into a river. I did it.

I'm a hero. Everyone's like, no. He's just an eccentric billionaire who just keeps buying expensive books and throwing them into rivers. He believes that's where they all came from. That's where books come from. Look it up. Read a book.

Oh, you can't. Throw it into the river. What's that you got there? Book. Think. Anyway, what started as a wild idea between a couple of high teenagers was starting to look like it was maybe a goer. No, it's not.

this planning stage, they realized they would need more people involved to pull it off. So Lipka called his old business partner Eric Borsick. Oh, Borsak. They met up and made up at a pizza bar. Although it's interesting with these interviews, so they've been interviewed about this a few times since, and the details change of it has been made into a film as well. And so in this article, closer to the time, which makes me sort of trust it more. Lipka said they met up at a pizza bar

but in the film it's talked about like it's a Japanese restaurant I think or it's another kind of cuisine anyway But it's an eating establishment It's not a pizza bar though Yeah that's Hollywood for you Yeah really juzzing it up Pizza

It's been done What about Japanese? Is that the sushi one? Yeah let's go there Was it sushi? The sushi one. Might not have been sushi.

Anyway, now I'm doing what he's done. I've added a new cuisine of the list. Tarcos. Everyone loves tacos. So they made up and then Lipka started pitching him the book heist plan. Or in the movie as they reenacted, he says, you got to tell me you in or out. And Borsick's like, in or out or what? He's like, I'm not telling you until you tell me if you're in or out.

He's like, I need to know a little more than this. And anyway, he ends up being in, and he tells him the highest plan. You're an idiot. And basically the plan is, hey, we've got buyers for these books. We just got to get the books. They considered stealing them under the cover of darkness. But I think Borset came in and he said, the likelihood of alarms being tripped makes under the cover of darkness harder.

It would be smartest to do it during business hours, you know, yet again, hidden in plain sight. which meant they would have to wait till after the summer break. The summer break was spent dreaming of what they would do with all that money. Falk rights that they were, whenever the three of them hung out, Lipka would frequently conjure up fantasies through billowing clouds of marijuana smoke of post-hast life for them in the Mediterranean, complete with sleek catamaranes and topless women. I said the Caribbean or Caribbean, but it was actually the Mediterranean.

See, I'm doing it. doing what they did. And do you know what, too, none of those topless women can draw better than him. There's an audition. He's like, I'm not hanging out with these, topless women. The day he finds a woman who can draw as well as him

is the day he meets his wife. That's beautiful. That's the perfect woman. And she doesn't exist. He's that good. Is that good, you guys? He's the best artist on planet Earth. He's the best artist in the galaxy.

Which is, I mean, you'd think that he could make it without stealing stuff, but sadly, he can't. He can't. Because the world isn't ready for his art. Someone that talented. We're all like, what? Because we don't get it. Me, mortals. We don't get it.

They, Lipka and Borsik, lived together along with a third uni student acquaintance. Chaz, Alan, the second. That's right. I was wondering where Chaz would come into this. Alan Borsick also ran a lawn care company together the previous year. Chaz seemed to be like a bit of a go-get it. The way I read it, maybe he comes from the wealthiest family of the three of them, as well as being their housemate. He also co-owned the house with his parents. So he was kind of like their landlord and housemate. And they're 20. I forgot that these. guys don't come from poor families. I mean, I'm not saying their parents are all millionaires and so, you know, but they're okay.

No, that's totally what it seems like. They've got a fine support network. They're not at all. I don't think they're like loaded, but they are, they're described as middle class. So I think, I think they're, you know, comfortable. According to the Herald leader, Alan co-owned CTA investments with his parents, the company, The business owned three Lexington properties, including the Beaumont House. And according to court records, they were valued at about half a million bucks.

I would love to go to the American property market. Whenever I see those sort of shows where they're buying a house in America, I'm like, it feels like I could almost afford a house over there. Yeah. Do you know what? Matt, you know how much I love house hunters? I was at work overnight and House Hunters was on TV. and I was like, fuck, yes.

And it was House Hunters International. I was like, yes, love this, because it's often people moving to different parts of the world. Yeah, the Spain ones are always great. I love the ones where they're going to a sunny place. Yeah, and it's like, even Island Hunters is very good. So I was excited for something a bit exotic, but it was actually a young couple moving from a place in northern Western Australia to Perth.

And so they were just looking at suburban houses, red bricks. In what way is that international? I guess it's interesting. international to people not in Australia, but I thought international... Yeah, but they weren't even moving internationally. The point is the house hunters are moving internationally, I thought. They're running out of ideas, Jess. No, were they like, West of Australia is so big.

It's basically made in countries. How did you describe it last week, Jess? It's fucking huge. He's fucking huge. It's honestly so fucking big. The Herald leader also says that Alan worked for his father's real estate company as well. according to the financial affidavit. His father, Tom Allen, is a part owner of Thompson and Riley,

a prominent Main Street auctioneer. And in the past, Charles Allen had also done appraisals for his father, according to court papers filed in connection to his father's 2003 divorce. So maybe he have a few skills in the old appraisal world. Let me just say, they go underutilised. Oh, so they're still going to Christie's. Fuck. Dumb.

So these kids. are just absolutely bored. They just want some kind of adventure. They just want a thrill. That does feel like it's a big part of it, yeah.

Just go skydiving or something. Go to a theme park. They did that for their six birthdays. He'd be like, let's go skydiving, but we'll land in a bank vault. We'll take everything and then we'll bungee jump out. When told of the plan, Alan derided the others as diluted

potheads. But once fully aware of all their prep work and the dollar value of the highest, Alan was in all their prep work. Alan was in as well. So it sounded like... No. Jazz, come on.

Chaz, you've got your whole life ahead of you. Everything's going really well. It really sounds like things are going well for Chaz. I mean, it sounds like he was born with a head start and he was making the most of it. He was starting up a little couple, like he had his little lawn care business and other things. Yes.

You're running businesses. you co-own your house, you've got your dad's business that you're learning stuff about, like, you're doing fine, Chaz, you're doing very well. For someone your age, you're fucking killing in my friend. And he's getting involved in a big crime with people he calls diluted potheads. Fucking hell, these kids are so bored. It just, yeah, yeah, uh, anyway, um, the other three don't like him that much either. So the interview with Falk, he was the only one that declined to be involved.

So a lot of what I'm talking about is from the other three's perspective more than his. And it does sound like he was at the start and remained the odd one out of the foursome. He got pretty frustrated with them the whole way through. God, I was frustrated with him from the first. Yeah, I think he sort of might have lived that the whole time as well. Like, guys, this doesn't make sense. You're doing this the dumb way. But he still went along with it.

I mean, that's the thing. So you sort of say on those maybe Reinhardt got involved with Lipker and that was bad for him. But it's like he did go along with it. They're adults. Yeah, they've made their own decisions. They're just dumb decisions. From me, a mature woman. I mean, I've always been a bit of a go with a flow guy.

So I'd hate to think. But I also, yeah, I feel like I probably would not have done this. You know, I don't like to sort of support you or build you up on the podcast. And I do it very little in real life. But you are a go with the flow guy, but the good kind. And you're also smart. So I don't honestly believe you would not be involved in this. I'd like to think I wouldn't be.

You might enjoy the conversation. And once you realize they were serious, you'd go, I've just got to go get something. I just slip out of their lives forever. Yeah, you would just sleep out and not answer their calls. Leave all my stuff in my room. I'd move out under the cover of darkness. Just non-confrontation. But you people are fucking idiots.

So I'm just going to go. So as the school year went back after the break, the group went to work surveilling the library and its staff, making detailed maps and taking notes of the librarians' routines. So they'd sit in their cars or on the roofs around and go, all right, librarian number two has left for the day again. And they'd keep these diaries day after day. And would they go into the library?

Some would be in, especially Ryanhart, who's the only one who actually goes to this university. So, Ryanhart's a trancy student. The other three go to the uni up the road, which is an insurmountable distance away. So they're all in there. Ryanhart even does another tour of the. by himself this time of the rare books room. So he's really scoping it out. He's drawing the map.

And obviously that's his skill set as well. And according to Falk, they climbed onto dorm roofs where they'd stake out the library for hours at a time, marking down the comings and goings of the teachers, students, and security personnel. They also did considerable research on the internet using such key terms as auction house appraisals, stun guns, and Swiss bank accounts. Oh my God. What are you doing?

For inspiration. What is it about Swiss bank accounts? I think they're just, because chocolate is such a stable commodity. I think Swiss bank accounts are a safe place to put money. Yeah, okay, that does absolutely make sense. And I feel a bit silly. I have no idea, but I assume it's like extradition treaties and stuff. Is it a non-extradition thing?

Yeah, that's it, isn't it? Right. But I don't know exactly. It would be something like, for some reason, It's less likely for your government where the money's been stolen from to be able to get it back. What a funny thing for your country to be famous for. Yeah, we ate it about criminals. White-collar criminals, usually.

I looked it up because that is really intriguing. The Swiss Banking Law of 1934 made it criminal for Swiss banks to disclose the name of an account holder. So they're a lot more confidential. Oh, okay. Falk also says, for inspiration, they watched Haist movies like Oceans 11 and Snatch. So they were doing their research. Research.

They were doing their research. Okay, we need to get a little guy who can do a backflip into a box. What for? I don't know, but I mean, all the movies have it. I've watched one. In late October, Lipka had written out a detailed plan and he presented it to the other three. Falk outlines the plan as follows. The day of the heist would be Thursday, December 16.

one of the last days of final exams. The library would be nearly empty, he said. Lipka, under an alias, would make an appointment with Gooch for that afternoon to view the books they wanted to steal. The plan for the actual robbery sets out three distinct phases. Phase one. This begins at the bungalow where they live, where three of them live, when all four get into what Warren Lipka designated as the GTAV. This is what he calls it the whole way through. It's called the GTAV.

Get away vehicle. The go-to and away vehicle. No. Not get-away? The go-to and away vehicle. The GTAV. That's what we're calling it. I make the rules.

And it sounds like he insisted on calling it. People are like, hey, where's the van? Uh-uh-uh. The G-T-AV. If the Cups hear us, they'll know what you mean by van. If they hear GTAV, that'll be. they'll be bored and stop listening. The go-to and away vehicle.

What the fuck? It's a good question. Another detail that you aren't aware of yet. They're all going to be disguised as old men. Phase one ends when the GTAV is parked in front of the library and the four are in first position at the bottom of the stairs of the library. That's a direct quote from his plan. Phase two involves the actual theft and begins when Spencer Ironheart takes his position

at the upper floor window of the nearby Athletic Center where he will be on lookout. Because Spencer was a transi student, he risked being recognized in the library, so he had to stay out. Lipka. Okay, that's the first clever thing we've done. First of many, here we go. Now it's when they get real smart. Lipka and Chaz, Alan, go up to the rare bookroom on the first. third floor and Warren Lipker brings Gooch down hard and fast. That's another quote. That's how he described

it. Bring down Gooch hard and fast with a stun gun, making her a quote, non-factor throughout the operation. Lipker and Alan then let Borsuch in and they begin wrapping the Audubons into bed sheets. These are the double heffalumps and put any smaller books in backpacks. The three then take the staff only elevator down to the bottom floor and escape at the West Fire exit. Phase two ends when the loot, let's quote, loot, is loaded into the GTAV. Still funny. Phase three is the escape,

which involves switching the GTAV for a second vehicle at a secret location, which, according to Warren Lipka and his plan, is used to transport the team and loot to temporary resting place, end quote. After the heist... Are they dead? Yeah, they've killed the books.

They've all shot the books and they've buried. them. They're never going to let them swim again. After the heist, since it is certain that the stolen books will be entered into art theft databases within a week, they have to get the books appraised at Christie's in New York immediately. The group all agree to this great plan. Okay. Further demonstrating how inspired Lipka was by cinema, he allocated each member of the team a codename, much like in Reservoir Dogs.

Ryan Hard was Mr Green, Lipka, Mr. Yenai. Borsick, Mr. Black, and Alan, Mr. Pink. Did he complain about it? Just like in the film, Alan hated being called Mr. Pink. You're kidding. That's a... I have to be Mr. Pink. There's so many colors.

He's definitely done it to fuck with him. I know he said he's... You haven't used blue. Orange? Is it blue? There's no blue? No. Green, yellow, black and pink.

Yeah, it's just to fuck with Alan. He could have used any color. But it's also funny. Like, this is 2004 when... boys would be offended by being associated with pink. Yeah. I feel like the world's moved on from that now. They're like, you know, there used to be a running joke

where people like, people would be offended if you're like, oh, I like your pink shirt. It's not pink, it's salmon. You remember that? Yeah, yep, yep. Now people, I've seen so many men wear pink and. I love it. And men are like, it's not salmon, it's pink, God damn it.

I'm Mr. Pink. Can I be Mr. Pink? Oh, I don't want to be Mr. Green. Please, he always gets to be Mr. Pink. No, you're Mr. Salmon. No, I'm pink. It's baby pink. Thank you very much.

And it brings up my eyes. I'm willing to compromise and we all get to be a different shade of pink. I'm hot pink. I'm Fuchsia. I'm Power Ranger Pink, okay? Each member had a different job to do. Lipka locked in in the appointment with Christ. using the Walter Beckman pseudonym.

He also emailed BJ Gooch and confirmed their December 16 appointment. He used public phones and campus computers to avoid the correspondence being traced back to him. Lipka also ordered four stun guns online. I'm sure why I needed four, but I guess it's good to have backups. Borsak was in charge of organizing the GTAV, which he did, organizing to borrow a friend's car. The friend was unaware of what was planned for it. What? So it's not even like a hired or stolen car or something.

They switched the number plates on it though. Oh, okay, okay. Yeah, okay. Because if you hire a car, like you've got a show ID. Which they could do, but yeah, just then maybe there's CTV footage in that shop and all that sort of stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah, sorry, I was thinking that they were just going to use their friend's car and then their friend would get arrested and he'd say, oh no, No, these four people borrowed it. That's it.

Oh, okay, thanks for that. No worries. Yeah, that's wonderful. Yeah, they shouldn't be far away. They've only just dropped it back. He also organized, this Borsuch, also organized the zip ties, bear cheats to cover the books, and the woolen cap that would cover Gooch's eyes.

Right. Being the artistic one, Reinhardt was in charge of disguises. He organized fake beards and other facial hair, gray wigs and costume glue. According to Falk, on the morning of December 16, Lipka's carefully scripted plan began to unravel almost immediately.

Borsuch couldn't get hold of his friend's car, leaving Chaz Allen to borrow a Dodge caravan that his mother was fortuitously selling the next day. The stun guns Lipka had ordered never arrived. So he drove around town and finally found a black cobra stunt pen. to buy and then he had Reinhart Zapp him and Borsuk to test its knockout power. Oh my God.

Oh my God. What are you doing? Did he get knocked out? Yeah, I guess it worked well enough so they kept going with the plan. When they arrived on campus in the replacement GTAV, still called a GTAV, they couldn't find a parking space anywhere near the library. They're just doing laps? Remembering how heavy the books are?

It's so important that it's just, it's great. close as possible. Dave, they're just gesturing out the window and are you... Following anyone who's got keys in their hand? You're going to it? Oh, no. Are you straightening up?

No, no, no, no. Oh, good. Oh, you're just putting stuff in your car. Okay, yep. No, right. Thank you. Cool, cool. Thanks, so.

Once they were inside the library, students stared at their ridiculous old man disguises. They wouldn't look... So heaps of witnesses. And they look... They're the ones who are saying, like, the more obvious we are, the better, like, as in, you know, but now they're going, hello, my name is Walter.

Oh, that's so bad. That's so, everyone, yeah, because you're right just with the witness thing. Like, everyone's just like, oh yeah, I remember those men, exactly. Yeah, I watched them for a while because I thought they were a bit odd. The ridiculous old man disguised were particularly ridiculous because Ryan Hart had to do a rush job on them because his art history final had run long. He had an exam that day. They all did, which I think they thought, you know, this will put them off the center

even more, as if people doing their exams are also going to do a heist that same day. Unlikely. They also noticed a group of people lingering in the rare bookroom, which they weren't expecting. I mean, after all, Walter Beckman had an appointment. So they're going up the stairs. I want to call him Lipka. He's going up to the stairs who's going to play the part of Beckman, and he sees this big group of people in there.

They quickly have a meeting in the library. They, what do we do? And they decide to abort. They all leave, jump in the GTAV, and they head back to the sharehouse. What? Right. Gooch later said that she noticed the group in their costumes,

and just assumed it was theatre students fooling around. They looked so ridiculous. They're just like, oh, they're just goofing around. It's the end of the semester or whatever. Lipka called Gooch to apologize for missing the meeting and rescheduled for the next day. Apparently his excuse was, sorry, I was out of town on business.

Oh, my God. That's something enough. An old man would say. Yeah, so funny. Oh, sorry, I was out of town on business. I mean, he was about to walk into the meeting with hastily glued on facial far out so but anyway now he's rescheduled for the next day and they revised the plan they

scrapped the old man disguises deciding they'll only wear you know the winter clothes instead they decided also that only lipka and borsuch would enter the library lipka would go in as beckman for the meeting then call borsick when he was ready for them to start hauling the books out of there basically when he'd taken care of bj With business. And then that left Alan the second as the GTAV driver. So he was sitting in the van. They had to get it all done by 1230.

This is the following day. Alan had to get the Dodge Caravan back to his mum in time for her to sell it. Oh, my God. Obviously his mum did not know about it. So it couldn't be like, Mom, the heist went long. And what about, so how are they going to get to New York real quick after? Well, they've got other cars as well. They just didn't want to use their own cars for this part of it.

Gotcha. On top of that, Reinhard and Borsick had to go to their exams in the early afternoon as well. I love, I think Borsick's exam was tennis. And he told Fogg, he's like, oh, it was actually hard than I was expecting. There was all these trivia questions about tennis or stuff. I didn't I wasn't expecting this. How many times has Pete Sampras won Wimbledon? I want to go to this university.

He had a tennis exam. Yeah, no, I've never heard of that as well. well, that's pretty fun. University tennis exam. Wow. I have a degree in tennis. On what sounds like a spur of the moment decision, and you'll remember this from earlier, Lipka bleached his hair with a thought it would give him extra anonymity.

Remember how one of the heisters at the start had bleach blonde hair? That was because Lipka, at the last minute, decided to bleach his hair. Oh my God. So at 11am on the 17th of December, things got off to a much smoother start. Alan scored the perfect parking spot for the GTAV. And then... Someone was just backing out. Then Lipker...

He whacked on the indicator. Shotgun, that's mine. That is my spot. Lipka went up for the meeting as Beckman and he got there bang on time. The next bit, you know, we already talked about at the start of the episode. Lipka knocks out Gooch with the stun pen. and Borsick ties are up with the zip tires and covers her eyes with the woolen cap. And it's around this time that Lipka said,

quit struggling, BJ, do you want to feel more pain? Falk takes the story from here. Once Warren had pulled, Warren Lipka, sorry, had pulled the cap over Gooch's eyes, the two laid a bed sheet on the ground and began piling on the seven audubon folios they intended to steal, which was the four volumes of birds of America, plus three volumes from another Audubon series.

The books were much heavier than the boys had projected, and the pair could handle only three at a time. They stuffed some of the smaller books Gooch had pulled out for them into their backpacks, with each taking one end of the audubans. They made their way to the staff-only elevator, as planned. We told BJ as we left, we were going to make an anonymous phone call, so they knew she was up there, Borsick said. We felt bad.

They were feeling bad about it before. beforehand and they said they were going to do all these things and they tried I mean but it sounds like they didn't they didn't do that they I don't think they made that anonymous phone call they didn't need to because someone found her but um it's like they were sort of telling themselves that they weren't so bad you know what I mean doing this thing that was they clearly knew was going to be traumatic but we're like we'll try and make it as as as easy as possible by not leaving her up there to be found we'll get someone to find her on this sort of stuff but And we're going to be millionaires after this.

They also have said, I believe, that they had plans of just sending her anonymously a bunch of cash, which obviously she would have not been able to accept. Otherwise, it would have looked like she was in on it. Exactly. So it's all a bit naive, at best. Oh, they're so dumb. Lipka and Borsick rode the elevator to the basement. I mean, this is all high stress, obviously.

but they couldn't find the fire exit in the basement. It just wasn't where they thought it was. They went back up the elevator, accidentally stopping on the main floor. So the two of them holding these huge books. Oh, they're so stupid. The doors slowly opened and they're realizing they're on the main floor going, shit.

The main librarian, Miss Brown, who we, Susan Brown, sees them. She doesn't know what they're carrying, but she's like, where do these kids come from? Borsick remembers. So we go back down to the bottom floor just to get away from her. I guess when we did that, she went upstairs to check on B.J. Realizing that the only way out was through the main floor, they took the elevator up once again and carried the books into the back stairwell that led to another exit. As they scooted down the stairs, their arms gave

out and they stopped to catch their breath. Borsick had propped the folios on the steps with his foot when the librarian appeared at the top of the stairs beside herself with rage after finding Gooch Hogtide in the rare bookroom. Oh my God. She's Susan Brown by name, but she's a fucking badass by nature. So she's coming for him. Yes, Susan. Borsick drops the books and Lipka made a run for it.

He just ran off in a random direction. He's panicked and he's run. That feels like him. him, yes. Ryan Hart is outside watching this all happen. They're taking a bit longer than than expected. And this is what he remembers. He says, I see Warren and Eric bust out the back door. This is Lipka and Borsick. They were 20 steps ahead of the librarian. Chaz Allen backs up the van and almost hits the woman as Eric Borsick comes around to the door. Lipka had run up the side of a hill and frantically run off. Borsick calls him and so I see Lipka go back. They jump in the

van and peel out around the loop. So he just frantically ran away, forgetting that he had this whole, he had a getaway car that he named this weird name. He still forgot about the GTAV. And when they're yelling out to him, are they yelling out Mr. Green, Mr. Green, or are they yelling at his name? I think they're, I don't know, but I think they're yelling at Mr. Green. And also, is there now a Mr. Brown and a Mrs. Brown?

No, there's no Brown, but that is great that the Brown got involved as well. She's part of the group Alan dropped off his two passengers on a random street corner He needed to get the car back to his mum So Lipka and Borsick are there with their backpacks They've dropped the most valuable part of their Highest anyway And they're just sort of on the

In this suburb of Lexington That they're not super familiar with What? He's like, I've got to get the car back to my mum I'll come back in another car and pick you up later. So they're just supposed to just stand there. Apparently there was some local guys that took a dislike into him

and they were being chased by some locals as well. What? Who Falk described as thugs. Yeah, I've been, he's going off of their stories. Lipka feels like he tells a wild story anyway. So according to Falk, Lipka and Balsick got out of the GTAV believing that they had escaped with next to nothing. In fact, wedged in their backpacks was nearly three quacks,

quarters of a million dollars worth of books and manuscripts. So they were hoping to get, you know, 10 plus million worth of stuff, but they still came out with a lot of valuable stuff. What they had was an 1859 first edition of Charles Darwin's on the origin of species by means of natural selection worth $25,000, an illuminated manuscript from 1425 worth $200,000, a set of the two volume 15th century horticultural masterpiece entitled Hortus San Francisco. a tartis worth $450,000, $20,000, $1,000,000, $1,000,000,

and audubins, a synopsis of the birds of North America worth $10,000. So, yeah, they thought we fucked it, but they still got all these things that just shoved in their backpacks, ended up being worth quite a bit of money anyway. Yeah. But when you've mentally already spent $8 million,

and now you're only going to get, like, a few hundred thousand, imagine being disappointed in that amount of money. Imagine. I think it's like 200 grand. What? Back at Warren's later that after, this is still folk, back at Warren's later that afternoon,

the boys were transfixed by the local coverage of the Transy Book Heist. According to the news, it appeared that neither Gooch nor anyone else was able to provide the police with an accurate description of the boys. The librarian who chased them out of the library did tell police the correct total of four thieves,

even though she had only seen three. She was just such a, fucking bad ass. Yeah. Yeah. Susan Brown by name. A witness had written down a license plate number, but it was way off, and it was based on a stolen plate so there's anyway.

They tried to come up with some lengths the cops could make between them and the theft, but they couldn't. In the early evening, they say they smoked some celebratory Kentucky bluegrass weed they had stashed away for the occasion. For something different, yeah. Yeah. Just something special. So they're like, I think we just got away with a book heist.

But you stupid little fucks. The next part was and they had already planned it out. They were heading to New York, baby. We're going to Christie's. We've got an appointment already made. So they made the 12-hour road trip, the four of them in Borsick's four-wheel drive, telling their parents they were heading away on a ski trip.

It's like they're still having to tell their parents. parents there. Alibis and stuff. Yeah. They arrived with plenty of time to spare, getting into town on the Sunday morning. So they had a Tuesday appointment. They got into town on Sunday. According to Falk, that night they had dinner at a Japanese restaurant.

Or maybe this is where the things were conflated. Followed by drinks at the hotel bar, where Warren chummed up to an Iraq veteran, Spencer almost started a brawl. That's Reinhart. Am I having to keep doing the, you know, Warren's Lipka, Spencer is Reinhart. So Spencer almost started a brawl after knocking a table of drinks over, and Eric picked up a middle-aged Brazilian tourist. They're living there.

What a weird night to do. I guess they're nervous about it all and they've still blown off some steam, but it feels like they all had very different nights. Or at least what a weird way for folk to break down their night. One of them met an Iraq veteran. One of them knocked over a table of drinks. One of them picked up a middle-aged Brazilian tourist. It was a big night.

And all it took was that she just drew a little picture on a napkin. I like how Reinhard said it, but you're just assuming they're all... I'm doing it for all of them, yeah. I just can't quite get past it, so I'm bringing it up as often as I can. When I put it in, I'm like, Jess is going to really love and hate this little tidbit. Yeah. You're right. You know me, well.

Lipka and Alan left the other two and stayed. to the nearby China club, a tacky Westside Night Club, which they knew about from the famous Rick James episode of Chappelle's Show. So they're doing a bit of Chappelle's show sightseeing. The next day, while hung over, they visited Ground Zero, then went to scope out Christie's ahead of the meeting before heading back to the hotel for an early night. So there's a bit of a sightseeing trip as well. It was decided that Lipka and Reinhart would attend the meeting while the other two would wait in the car around the corner. I think in hindsight, surely you send in the guy who's got some experience with appraisals.

Yeah, right? Yeah. That's kind of a deal. They've got him assigned as basically the getaway driver. That's really all he's done and sort of bust their balls a bit. Yeah, he's furious with them when they get back in the car anyway. So the other two wait around the corner, Lipka and Reinhardt went in. They knew they had to dress the part as to not look suspicious to the Christie's stuff.

And according to... Oh no, tuxedos. Oh no. But also old men faces. I mean, you're sort of in the ballpark. According to Falk, dressed for success in a tailored dark blue suit his parents had bought for special occasions and future job interviews, Lipka cultivated the young conservative look, using a wins a nod on his red tie and giving his wingtips a last-minute buff.

Spencer Reinhardt assembled his outfit with even greater care, starting with the 1970s Pierre Cardin, a canary yellow blazer that had belonged to his grandfather. He wore a dress shirt with an ostentatiously large collar and a gold silk scarf. For footwear, he went with white, clean sneakers. And for pants?

Not at all. He's wearing a bright yellow blazer. With a massive collar and then an ostentatious scarf. I love it. What a... What a look. Oh my God.

The other guy's just gone for like, I'm a young businessman. And this guy's like, I'm a billionaire. Hello. I'm an eccentric billionaire. Hello. These books mean nothing to me because of my net worth, but still, I praised them. They arrived and let reception know they were there for Beckman's appointment with Thomas Lecky, Christie's rare book specialists. Instead, Melanie Halloran greeted them and took the meeting.

She said that unfortunately Lecky wasn't available. They introduced themselves as Mr. Williams and Mr. Stevens, the sole representatives of Walter Beckman, who recently inherited some rare books, which he wanted a praise. It sounds like a relatively solid cover story. I guess so, yeah. But they must be pretty good at detecting if people are, because they'll get in trouble too if they sell stolen shit.

So they must be pretty good at getting around that run. They would have to give it. the money back, right? And the possession. So, and it would just be bad for their reputation, all sorts of things like that. Halloran went through the items, asked questions and took notes. After 30 minutes, the meeting ended with the pair being told they'd hear from Halloran after she chatted to her superiors, probably Lecky.

Reinhardt gave her his mobile phone number to call. When they got back in the car, Alan was like, what the fuck you, all you had to do was come out with the figures. you needed a sheet of paper. Instead, you've left behind your own mobile phone number. He was furious. Yeah. Yeah, because they don't want to actually sell it.

They want just that paper that says this is what they're worth, take it to Amsterdam and then sell. So now they're connected via this mobile phone number and they didn't get the thing they wanted anyway. And now they're not in the room with her and who knows what the conversations will say. Their best chance was just to do it quickly. I don't know how likely that was,

but Alan seemed to think it was. as possible. At Alan's insistence, they stayed an extra night to try and see Thomas Lecky the following day, the rare book specialist. They attempted to call Lecky multiple times in the morning and in the afternoon, left messages with reception, but he did not get back to them. So, Oh, he's on to them. He calls their bullshit. They returned home to Lexington. What a rough 12-hour car ride that must have been. What the group didn't know was that Halloran found them super suspicious. Oh no.

And she told her boss Lecky that she recommended that they don't follow up with them and just leave it though. She didn't say let's get the cops involved. She said, these guys are dodgy. Let's just let it be. In the meantime, the Lexington police continued their investigation. They were able to trace the email from Ben, Beckman to a computer lab at the University of Kentucky, which led them to trawling through hours of footage of that computer room, but they couldn't find anything.

So they still had no idea, really. Then in mid-January, Yahoo delivered all the data they had relating to the Walter Beckman Yahoo email address. They got a federal affidavit for Yahoo to release that to them. And this is what would unveil the group's biggest slip-up. as well as the phone number, they also used the same email address to both set up the initial book meeting for Beckman at the library,

but also for the meeting at Christie's. So now the cops are like, oh, these guys, they've gone to Christie's, and they've done it on this date. Let's get in contact with Christie's. So the FBI went and interviewed Halloran, and according to Falk, she described one of the young men as about,

about six feet tall with bleached blonde hair, well dressed in a nice suit and very talkative. The other was short and quiet, wearing a yellow jacket, two sizes too large, and a matching scarf. Quote, And no pants. I could see everything and I was very uncomfortable. Quote, he looked like he was dressed from a thrift store. Oh. He was trying to look rich and he didn't.

He didn't quite nail it. The FBI were also able to get CCTV footage of Ryan Hart. and Lipka at Christie's and the phone number Reinhart left with Haller and she still had and she passed it onto them as well. Yeah. So they just called it and said, who's this? Whereabouts are you? Not too far off.

They found out that the phone number was registered to Spencer's father, Gary Reinhardt, and then they called the number and they got the voicemail, this is Spence, leave a message. Oh, fuck. Oh my God, Spencer, you dumb shit. I don't know why he didn't change it. Obviously, yeah, maybe he didn't realize that he'd slipped up there. I would change my eyegoing message to, hello, this is eccentric billionaire. I can't hear you.

I'm not wearing any pants right now. Leave a message of one of my many secretaries might call you back. I'm incredibly busy. Good day. I guess it would have been, either way, they would have just gone to his dad and gone, who's, who's this phone? Oh, your son? Oh, he looks like this guy on this CCTV. T-T. C-T-T-V footage.

Damn it. So what did the FBI do? They did an internet search of Spencer Ryanhart, Lexington, and it brought up a bunch of hits, including the photo from the Lexington Herald leader of Ryanhart and Lipka playing soccer. It's a soccer guy! And they said, geez,

these two have a real sharp resemblance with Mr. Stevens and Mr. Williams. from Christy's appointment. So they were done. They just found them on Google Images. They found them on Google Images. Oh my God. In the meantime, Reinhardt made the stomach churning realization

that they'd used the same Yahoo email address for both appointments and knew it was only a matter of time before they were arrested. The FBI didn't arrest them straight away, though. Instead, they had them followed. Trying to live as normally as possible, they just went, we're going to live on with our lives, but it sounds like the pressure was breaking them. All of them got done for different minor crimes in that time.

One for drink driving. One for stealing a frozen dinner from a supermarket. One of them, they were pulled over when Lipka was riding on the roof of a friend's car that was speeding. Hey guys, let's just try to lay low, get on with our lives as normal, not bring attention to ourselves. Want to ride on my car roof? Sure. See, this is the kind of adrenaline rush they've all been looking for, and instead they went on a book heist.

Oh, no. Then one day, Reinhard, Lipka and Borsick went to the cinemas to see Oceans 12. No. No, Matthew, no. Please tell me, that's what the FBI arrest them. Please. That would be so amazing for the rest of the audience members. I'm afraid not, but they did loudly comment along as they watched.

According to Borsick, it was just fun. because we've been in a lot of places that they've been. Like, they were doing something serious, talking about the heist going over the plan, and somebody would make a joke. So we would see these parts, and we'd be like, oh, this is just like us. And they talked like that through the whole film.

What they didn't realize is the FBI agents were sitting behind them. No, why? Okay. So I'm just going to say, in my mind, I was kind of trying to work out whether this is the dumbest heist we've ever covered because we've done a few

we've done the dumb and dumb of bandits which they got caught very very quickly there's the Loomis Fargo heist where they were taking money back to the bank that still had the wrappings of where they'd stolen them

from the truck and I thought there's no way it could get dumber than those two but talking about the crime you've done loudly during Oceans 12 in a public cinema that might be the dumbest thing

we've ever heard do you know what that would have been for those FBI agents that would have been best day at work ever. Because you'd be sitting there so smug, listening to the whole thing, and just look at it like, these fucking idiots. This is the best.

Also, can I have more popcorn, please? It would be hard not to laugh out loud as they were talking about it. Yeah. And then just say, sorry, Brad Pitt's very funny, isn't he? He's always eating for some reason. Anyway. So funny. Then within a couple of days, on the morning of February the 11th, 2005, a SWAT team broke

down the front door of their sharehouse, and were all arrested. This is from Falk. Cop centred the basement, a dank pit reeking of marijuana, and found Lipka sprawled out on the mattress. He was whisked into a squad car. In a duffel bag by his bed, an FBI agent discovered the stolen books, all undamaged, as well as the five-page type plan for the heist, an accounting ledger, wigs, instructions for opening a Swiss bank account, and the stun guns, which apparently arrived after the robbery. And also a signed confession. So they didn't even try to hide all this shit.

Yeah. Put it in a box and lock it up or something. It sounds like Ryan Hart said that he figured it out and he said, oh, we've made this bad mistake. It's a matter of time. I don't know. Surely you go, all right, what do we do here? Maybe we return the books.

We own up. Surely, you know, you get ahead of the game. You confess. Yeah. That'll bring down our sentences, maybe. I don't know. I'll go right on top of a car. Ryan Hart was arrested in a simultaneous raid on his dorm room at Transi.

All four were brought to Lexington Police Headquarters and individually interrogated by FBI and local detectives. Faced with overwhelming evidence, they all eventually confessed. Apparently three of them did first and I think Borsick said, I think I'm going to need my lawyer. And then his lawyer got there and I guess he went, I confess. Yeah, his lawyer went, what are you doing, Dickhead? Just confess. You, like, you've laid it out. Everything but signed the confession, you've done it. As the Lexington Herald leader reported at the time, court papers alleged a plot that seems more slapstick caper than high stakes crime, thieves who barely escaped, dropping the most valuable books as they ran, who used the same email account to set up the heist and sell the goods, giving the police an electronic trail.

But the elements of the crime, a stun gun, a tied-up librarian, stolen goods worth at least five and five. thousand dollars means that the four could spend up to ten years in prison if convicted and there was during the court case there was arguments made from each side about the two eight million or the eight million dollar package they'd take they'd taken it out of its place but they didn't get it off the property so uh prosecution argued that that should count in the amount and the bigger the amount the heavier the um sentencing could be all right but they were like oh no they weren't stealing the big So we're just moving them in sign library. Feng Shui.

Yeah. In the end, the judge or the magistrate or whatever did say, did accept that, that they weren't actually stolen. They weren't added to the cost. And they were ended up sentenced to seven years without parole. None of them dogged each other. They all had the opportunity. Hey, you, you talk in court about them, you'll get a reduced sentence.

And they all sort of stood by each other in that way. I thought for sure you were going to say that. it was argued as to whose plan it was to try and be like, they're the ringleader. I was just driving the car. I didn't even know what I was doing. You think they'd all blame Alan because I hate him anyway. Yeah, either they all just throw Alan in it or Lipka,

who it does feel like it did do a lot of it. I mean, in more recent interviews that I saw in the film in particular that I want to talk about soon, I was made about it. He did say, he's like, people are making me out to be the ringleader, but we're all in it together. He sort of doesn't see it that way. And it's interesting how their different memories of it contradicts some little bits and pieces as well. So this film, I don't know if you've heard of us, from 2018, so it's pretty recent.

I watched it last night. It's a film about the heist called American Animals. The film features real-life interviews with Lipka, Reinhardt, Borsick and Alan. And the Sundance website describes it as both a thrilling heist film and an existential journey of four misguided young men searching in all the wrong places for, identity, meaning, adventure, and the kind of life that movies are made about. Oh. It's a really good film.

Yeah, it is really, really good. And, yeah, Lipka in it, he's very charismatic, as you'd probably expect, you know, the class clown guy, great talk and all that sort of stuff. And then I found Ryan Hart very likable as well. And yeah, something about Ryan Hart was like, oh, I'm like, oh, I really kind of like this guy. Right. Yeah, they're all kind of likable. Does he still have his yellow, black?

No, it just looks like a normal, it looks like a normal guy now. He's grown into it, basically. Still wearing the yellow blazer, but it now fits in. And they're still young. Yeah, so they're just in their early 30s now. And did they spend the full seven in prison? Yes, they all spend a little over seven years in prison. Oh, my goodness.

Do they talk about that experience at all? Not too much. I mean, in that interview that I've been quoting from a lot, Lipka was still sounding real like it ends with some kind of cringy comment like, this isn't the last you've heard of us, we're going to do big things. Oh, wow. I decided to leave that out. Now I put it in.

In the film, though, I want to talk a little bit about Gooch, because I'm a big fan. In the film, the theft scene is super brutal. And I think that's kind of changed my vibe on this whole story. I'm just like going, at Hammers' home, it's like, this isn't just a goofy thing. They've traumatised an innocent woman who was just going about her business. And that scene is long and it is a hard watch. As the Herald leader writes, The notorious moment in Transi's history is now portrayed in a new movie American Animals,

which makes it clear how central Gooch was to the whole story. The heist, the trial, the prison time, the magazine pieces, the books, and now finally the film. Gooch's ordeal took what would have been a simple heist into the realm, into the realm of serious violent crime. She found herself unable to talk about it for many years and has never before spoken to the media. The trauma came not just from being tied up and threatened,

but the added violations of two sacred things, the workplace she regarded as a home and the special relationship she had teaching students about so many Transe's treasures. Gooch was initially nervous about seeing the film, but she told the Herald Leader in her first public interview that she watched it in her home with director Bart Layton and that it, quote, helped her heal and even reach a place of forgiveness.

Oh. What a gun. I mean, she definitely has no, there's no responsibility to forgive in my mind. Absolutely not, no. In the film's interviews with the four men, they talk candidly about their boredom with their privileged Lexington lives and the need to make a mark with even the most ridiculous of plans. Leighton also interviews Gooch in one brief scene at the end,

in which he concludes, it makes me wonder if they really know why they did it at all. I thought he did a wonderful job, Gooch said of Layton. I was very nervous about watching the movie. Then I changed my mind. I think he was so successful in interviewing the guys. I came away with a fuller understanding of what made the guys tick. It helped me close a door on it and have a more forgiving attitude.

I think it was good for me to see the film. It was therapeutic. Forgiveness is a work in progress. I have good days and bad days, she said. The bottom line is, I don't bear them any ill will. I really don't anymore. The bottom line is how can you get on with your life if you wake up every morning with this huge grudge,

filled with hate and all this? So she went straight back to work, but then realized, you know, she's in there alone and it realized that it had affected her quite badly. So she needed to take a leave. And, you know, she's still feeling it, but she's getting better as time goes on by the sounds of it. Wow.

She's still working that job. Wow. What a legend. And what about the boys? I don't know if you're about to say this, but did they have genuine remorse for the violent part of the crime? Yeah, well, that does. I mean, the way the movie goes about it,

it shows that they do feel bad about it. It does feel like they have genuine remorse. And they're all sort of now out of prison and trying to get on with their lives. Alan, who, you know, probably would be a multi-millionaire by now. Maybe he is anyway. But I think he's working as a gym trainer. You've got the only one still in Lexington is Ryan Hart,

who's making a career as an artist. And I saw some of his paintings. He is very talented. Is he more talented than girls? Have you seen any talented? female artists? Me either. Oh, they're like girls into art class now, huh? Borsick is trying to make it as a writer and Lipka as

he's studying film. He's trying to work in film. Coincidentally, a copy of John James Audubon's Birds of America sold at Christie's the same year the film came out. So we got an update, updated price. on its value, now just short of 10 million US dollars. Damn. 9.65 million. Wow.

And I thought maybe just to finish on it, I think this is a kind of a cute thing to finish on, the same article, which was the first interview with Gooch, says that Gooch recommended the film to friends and family, even though it was pretty traumatic retelling, but she thinks it's really good. Turns out that BJ Gooch, Guardian of History, is also a pop culture junkie, who already knew of the young actors, Evan Peters and Barry Kean, who played Lipka and Reinhardt. She's also a huge fan of the actress who played her Anne Dowd, most recently in a Handmaid's Tale, who has appeared in countless other movies.

That's sort of fun. That's cute. Yeah, that would be so good. It's like, oh, I'm getting played by an actor I really love. Yeah, that would be a thrill. Oh, Gooch sounds like a legend. Yeah, big Gooch fan. I think that library sounds sick.

Gooch and Brown. Brown and Cooch. Oh, my God. What a partnership. I want to visit that library. I really want to, yeah, I'm like, I want to reach out to. I imagine so many people would have sent her emails and stuff since. Like, hey, Gouge, you fucking rock.

You're all Gouge. It's a sort of, it's a very satisfying ending because they didn't get away with it. And also, obviously, Gooch was hurt and traumatized, but there was no sort of deaths or anything like that. and they've all served their time. You know, it feels satisfying that I'm not like, oh, they got away with it or something, you know? Yeah, I think as far as how these things can go, this is pretty good. You can never undo the, you know, the trauma and all that.

But as good as the system works, I think it seemed to work in this case. I wonder if, and I hope they learned to because just for, they were just looking for a thrill, basically. And they just had classic white boy confidence that they could pull off something like that. and then they didn't. I wish I had classic white boy confidence. You do, you just don't even know you have it. Oh my God, do I? That's the thing about white boy confidence.

Oh, that's so good. Dave, you've got it too? Yeah, I pulled off several hires. Yeah. Why do I doubt myself about everything? Or is that what white boy confidence is? No, it's just worse for everyone else. Really?

That is so funny that you can get inside my head like that. And know how I feel. One other thing I should say in the film it made it out an interesting thing that doesn't come across in the articles they read at all. But there is some doubt in Reinhart's mind now that some of the things that Lipka said were true at all. Like he's like, I mean, I dropped him off at the airport to go to Amsterdam, but I didn't see him get on the plane. And then he's also like, I mean, the man with the ponytail, is that just how we're. you told me it happened or did I actually see it? I'm not even, I'm not sure now.

Maybe he just took that 500 bucks. He's like, maybe he was just making up all that stuff, which would be pretty incredible. That's not clear either way. And then Lipka's like, you'll just have to take my word for it. That all happens in the film as well, which is a weird, weird twist. And the way they do it in the film is that sort of they go back to those scenes and just tweak them a bit. And they play with that a bit because they're using real interviews. into the scenes.

Two of them will be confused about where a conversation took place. So they'll show it occurring both in a car and at a party because one of them remembers it at a party, one of them remembers it at a car. So yeah, it's kind of some fun little techniques like that are used. Yeah, sounds really interesting. Yes. Sick. Well, that brings us to everyone's favorite section of the show, I do believe.

And it has a little jingle that goes something like this. Fact, quote, or question. Ding! I always remembers the ding. The way to get involved in this is you sign up at Patreon.com slash 2Gon Pod on the Cindy Schaumburg Deluxe Memorial Edition level and you give us then a factor, quote or a question, and you get to give yourself a title,

and you get all sorts of other bonuses like bonus episodes, voting rights on topics. This topic was voted on by the Patrions, and this topic won on a landslide. I put up three different heist. options. And this one got nearly 50% of the vote. Anyway, here are some facts, some quotes and some questions from some of our Patreon supporters. This one is so close to a question that was asked last week. I'll see if you have any

fresh ideas for it. It comes from Sasha Eisenstadt, who gives herself the title of Tour Guide of the Do Go on Universe or the Do Go On Universe. And her question is, what is the strangest story you have from a job you've worked? Hang on. Was that the exact question from last week? Yeah, it's so close. What was the most weird experience at a job was what was asked last week by Nick. Oh, wow. Gosh, I feel like I really burnt some stuff here.

But have you not had anything weird happen this weekday? Oh, Dave, you should tell the story of booksheet. That is strange. To me that's strange. It's infuriating more, but it is also strange. I didn't put out my episode of book cheat this week and I still haven't. Well, maybe by the time this comes out, who knows? Because I recorded with two guests, but one of the microphones of the guests when recorded, for some reason, is about 7% faster than everyone else's conversation.

So I've had to manually edit each sentence that they say and it is absolutely killing me and twice the project is fucked up. So I've gotten over half. I've spent over six hours of my life editing this and I still don't have a podcast to put out. So who knows if we'll ever see the light of day? I don't think you can really count yourself as a successful podcast until you've lost an episode.

You know? All the greats have lost them. Although you're going to say, I don't think you can really count yourself as a successful podcast until you've actually started putting him out regularly, Dave. This is not good enough. So who knows? It's King Lear.

And honestly, listening back, when it is in sync, I think it's very fun and funny. That's why I do want to save it. But is it going to happen? I don't know. Is it salvageable? How about you guys? Is anything weird happened in your lives this week?

It's your job. No, this is my job. We haven't done anything strange today. Yeah, this story, I don't know if I've told before, but I used to do some community TV in the mornings. I used to, for a 10 weeks, I hosted this show called Get Searle TV with Alistair Trumb. Bertrand from doing the think tank.

And at the same time, I was working full-time selling air conditioning. And so I'd go in there, I'd get up at 5 or whatever go in and do the TV thing and then I'd go to work for the day. And then one time, I'd sold this job. And it was the installer that the plumber was putting in this system. And he was trying to figure out who drew up the floor. plan and size up the job and everything. That's what I did.

And he's asking the client, he's like, who can you describe the guy? And he goes, uh, sort of, yeah, I don't know, like kind of tall, lanky guy. And, and then Andy the installer goes, kind of seems like he's stoned. And the guy goes, yeah, yeah, that's him. And then he goes, actually, he's that guy there. And he pointed the TV and I was on TV at that time. You're kidding. That's awesome.

That's amazing. That's great. I think that was pretty strange. Did he clarify, he's not stoned. He just looks like it. I promise you, he's definitely not stoned, but he gives off that vibe. Yes, this is a vibe thing. It just has a dumb voice.

It's a dopey voice. He's sorry. He's sorry, can't do anything about it. Thank you so much, Sasha. You don't have any, you haven't been a Triple J lately? Oh, last night. but nothing strange happened. Yeah, you watched an episode of Escape to the Country

where they didn't even move country. How weird is that? House Hunter's International and they moved in the same state. Come on. Bullshit. Now that's strange. There you go. That is strange.

That's good. Thanks so much, Sasha. Great question. Sorry, I mean, it's impossible. We should be known that these questions would have been submitted before last week's one was read out. So it's impossible to know. Yeah, of course.

But it was a question so nice. They asked it twice. And I love that. That's a good question. This next one comes from Gary J from the UK. Gary J. He's given himself the title, Knock Knock, who's there?

Owen. Owen, who? Owen, the Saints go marching in, I suppose. Gary's giving us a fact. And this fact is, percentages are reversible. 8% of 25 is the same as 25% of 8. And one of them is much easier

to do in your head than the other. Ain't maths fun? Yes, they are, Gary. That's a fun fact. I wouldn't have been able to, yeah, that makes sense I didn't know that. I think, does it? Well, let's just use an example then.

Okay, here we go. Mr. Abacus at work. Yeah, no, that makes sense because 10% of 100 is 10. And 100% of 10 is 10. Okay. That's great. I didn't know that. I wouldn't have been able to tell you that.

So Gary Jay, you have blown our minds. Well done, Gary. Give out maths the math magician. Thank you, Gatti, Jay. The next one comes from Michael Killon, who's given himself the title, Director of Scones, Clotted Cream and Strawberry Jam. Well, it doesn't specify an order. But I mean, let's assume the order that he set it in is the order that he lays them down. Scones first, clotted cream, then the game.

I think we actually probably can assume that. We can also assume that he's incredibly wrong. Sorry. Sorry, Michael. No, you can't call him wrong now. This is his time to show him. I know. That's right.

All right. Michael has asked the question. Aside from the excellent books on book cheat, do any of you have a favorite nonfiction book? For example, a motivational or self-help book? The courage to be disliked has been a personal favorite of mine recently. Love the show team. Keep rocking on. Okay, so non-fiction. Is there a book out there called How to Be White Boy Confident? Because if not, there should be. That really annoyed you, didn't it? Sorry about that. No, I didn't know.

I just thought I was a little funny callback there. I'm trying to find the name of it now because somehow I forgot it even though I only read it very recently. The book that was written that I used as a reference for the Real Lord of the Flies book written by Rutger Bregman. Okay, I'm Googling as I go and I'm stalling. Okay, I'll talk for a second if you want while you're going. Google?

Yeah, sure. I read the Leonard Cohen, sorry, biography, I'm Your Man a few months ago, and I loved it. And what first self-help? I don't, I did go through a phase of reading a few,

a couple of years ago, maybe like, back when I was, working in a air condition, my boss was riding in him, so he got me on a few. But then I read, a friend,

got one that I read, I sort of flipped through a little bit called Tools of Titans by Tim Ferriss. Tim Ferriss. And I think, I mean, there's some stuff in that. You know, those books are halfway between cringy and helpful. I can never quite know what to feel about it. Yeah.

There was some good stuff in it, I think. Have you found your one, Boppa? Yes, thank you. The one that I was talking about is humankind, a hopeful history by Rutger Bregman. It's quite nice and it is hopeful and it's sort of stories of how people people, you know, it's always portrayed in movies that in times of disaster, humans act in really terrible ways, you know, but in actual fact, when bad things have happened throughout history, humans have been really good to each other. And it's quite nice, especially at

the moment when it feels like the world is ending. It's nice to be like, oh, maybe humans aren't so bad. And I'm currently also reading Claire Bauditch's book, which is called Your Own Kind of Girl, and it's a memoir and it's very nice. I'm enjoying it a lot. So, yeah. Sick. Very nice. As for me, I don't need self-help books because I am white boy confident.

So I don't really read a lot of non-fiction or self-healthy type stuff, I must say. I do love my copy of the guide to every episode of The Simpsons. So there you go. Oh, cool. Do you work with Claire Bode? She works out of ABC radio, doesn't she, Popper? I think so, but I haven't. I haven't met her.

I have seen her once we were at the same nail salon, but I didn't feel like that was an appropriate time to say hello. So I left it. She looks open for a chat. She's getting a pedicure. I'm getting a manicure. Here's a time to form a friendship. That's a good question.

Thank you, Michael. And finally, the last one is from Nathan Damon. And he's written in brackets pronounced. Nathan Damon spelled the same way. Very good stuff. Good to check. Good to check. Nathan's given himself the title

Senior Executive Partner of the Saints is now my second team division of Shetland Incorporated. Oh, Nathan, bumped up to second team. Nathan's an Eagles fan, I'm pretty sure. So he doesn't know pain or suffering.

Nathan's what I would call what boy confident. He's given us a quote. It's from Nathan. He writes, puns are the highest form of literature Alfred Hitchcock Now can we verify that Dave

They are the highest form of literature That's true Wow So Hitchcock was on the money That seems like a fake quote to me But Dave's looking at me like I would never doubt I would never doubt

The word of Nathan Yeah well if puns are the highest form of literature Well then Nathan truly is domain All right If we could have that bit edited out. No, please get him in. Thank you. It's coming up.

There's a YouTube video here of Alfred Hitchcock. I obviously can't play it because we are recording the show. But Alfred Hitchcock, it just says puns of the highest form of literature. And then there's a photo of him. So I think it might be. That sounds about right. Well, that brings us to the next part of everyone's favorite section of the show where we thank a few more patrons.

And Jess somebody comes up with a little game for this. it's somehow related to the episode. What do you reckon this time around, Bopper? I was thinking of what they could steal. Oh, yeah. Fantastic. What are you going to heist? I think that's a bit.

Why don't they talk like that more? I'm going to go heisting. Yeah. You know, use it more like a verb or whatever. What's the difference? At the end of the day. You know? Yeah.

Between a heist and a theft. Yeah, like someone mugs you on the street. Oh, I've had my pockets heisted. I've been heisted. Officer, I'd like to report a heist. In my pants Well if I could kick it off If that's okay with you two

I'd like to thank from Kanaara in W.A. Carol O'Malley You've been at Kahnara haven't you, Bob? Yeah, I think so. You perform there? I don't know On that tour that you look back on fondly. I'm not sure.

I don't know if I was in Kanaura actually. I don't think I was. But who can say? Probably me. I should be able to and I don't know. But I would like to mention that Western Australia is fucking huge. So big.

And so free right now. Yeah. Just so free to get about. Yeah, they can just go anywhere they want. At any time. It's very exciting. But Carol, of course, and her gang heist at a pharmacy. Oh, so they're getting, we're talking behind the counter?

Or are they just heisting from the room? Just shampoo. Conditioning. Jelly beans. Vitamin C tablets, the chewy ones. Some very cheap sunglasses. Yeah, but then some like very expensive like hair dye and stuff. So, you know.

Yeah, what else do they got in there? They've got all sorts of stuff like. Raps for injuries. Yes. And ice packs. Yep. You got it all. Yeah.

Those CPI's done. So much of the stuff you need to perform a heist is on the floor in there. So they're going to have to do a hise to prepare for their hires. Hmm. Double hice, Carol, that's what I'm thinking. Thanks so much for your support. You've been supporting us for over a year now. Bloody legend, as has from Cran Lee in Surrey, Great Britain, George Royal.

Oh, my goodness. What a name. George. Oh, George. George has, of course, conducted a heist of royal family memorabilia. Whoa. So not like the Crown Jewels type. stuff, but like little commemorative plates and all those sorts of things.

Yes. Love that. And yeah, just like a memento versions of all these things. Crown jewels. Yeah. Key rings. He's got like a little figurine of it. Yeah.

Key rings, yeah, yeah, of a crown. Fridge magnets of, you know. Kate and Will. Yeah. From their wedding. Harry and Megan T-shirts. He's got postcards of all the kids. Oh, George.

What a whole. That's a whole. I mean, you're not too far away and sorry from making that all happen. What's stopping yet? What's stopping you? I'd love to finally thank from Footscray in the wonderful western suburbs of Melbourne, Jessica Elise McKee. Oh, fantastic.

And I believe Jessica is going to organise a heist of the Melbourne Aquarium. Oh, get yourself a dolphin. They don't have dolphins there. I'm going to ride the dolphin to victory. Oh, that is definitely got the setup of bad botched heist written all over it. He didn't realize how heavier shark would be. I thought I could wrap it in a sheet and carry it down the stairs. And he's just got like a pump water bottle just sort of squirting it on the shark for a bit.

Why is it stopped moving? This shark sucks. Your shark's broken. He takes a shark back to his school and says attack. Attack his bullies. Oh, that's good. That's a good one. I don't know if it is.

Oh, the aquarium, yes. our acting out of it. No, I love. I'm loving picturing. I mean, animal cruelty aside, I'm very much enjoying that. Bob, do you want to thank a few of our great patrons? I would absolutely love to. I would love to thank from Aylesbury, somewhere in Great Britain.

It's a bit of a mystery. And so is their surname, but I would love to thank Macy. Oh, great name, Macy. Thank you, Macy. And Matt, what is Macy heisted? Maisie has gone into the big flower show here in Melbourne. So she's flown out for it. Where's the big, no, it's in Canberra.

Where's the big flower show? Somewhere in Australia where at the same time as a comedy festival. There is one in Melbourne, yeah. All right. She's gone to the Melbourne Flower Show. And she's left with bags and bags of fertilizer and mulch. Whoa. as well as one of those prize flowers that only blooms once a century or whatever that one.

Oh, the one that smells like a rotting horse flesh, that one? Yeah, specifically horse flesh. Wow. Mazey, you're an evil mastermind. You're going to make a lot of money from that. Great haul. Congrats. Congrats with that hall, Mosey.

I would also love to thank from Cana Windra in New South Wales. Wales, Kate Bain. Oh, Bainz. Nice. I reckon Kate Baines. She goes in to, and this is the perfect crime, during a big football match,

she goes in and it's a tight match, so everyone's out there watching, she goes in and steals all the hot dogs, sausage rolls and hot chips. Oh, wow, but she leaves the pies alone. Good on her. That's a hero right there. Amongst thieves.

We don't touch pies. And does she try and sell them back to the public? She goes outside where her accomplice is waiting with a little stall and she sells them all slightly cheaper and makes a killing. Because, you know, I mean, there's no point in stealing hot chips for later. Everyone knows they're useless. Oh, soggy and cold. Yeah, no good.

No, thank you. So thank you very much, Kate. Finally, I would love to thank from Newport News in, what's a VA? Virginia. Thank you. Why can't I remember? Anyway, because I'm still doing that thing every night where I'm going to all the States. That's why, Jess, is because you're probably doing something with your time, and I'm not.

I'm watching Marvel movies and playing the Sims. So, you know, we're both using our brains in different ways. but I would love to thank Zachary Ganesoszowski Genizzii Ganesuski maybe You know what Dave came over the top there

with a little bit of white boy confidence in pronunciation You're goddamn right And did I nail it? Thank you He needs that confidence No I'm saying the white boy confidence was misguided there

As it often is I'd say Sorry Zachary But thank you so much for supporting us and of course for heisting what Dave? He's robbing IKEA. Oh, that's a good haul. But then you've got to build it. Yeah, for sure.

I think, honestly, and I've just realized I've just ordered one more flat pack thing that I'm going to have to build, which is very annoying. But I think I never want to build flat pack ever again. Wow. Okay. I hate it with a passion. She'd rather just solid.

What's the opposite? I don't know. I don't know. Just things. coming already done. It's already been built for you. Do you like jigsaw puzzles and stuff? Fucking hate them. Yeah, right. I think I quite like puzzles, so

I kind of don't mind putting together things like that. But do you know what I've just bought myself, even though I'm so confident I'm going to hate it, is like a little mini, it's like a little mini dollhouse thing that you build, but it's a greenhouse. So it's got all these cute little mini plants in it and you have to build the walls and stuff. And I've just ordered that, even though I know I'm probably going to last five minutes. That sounds sick though.

It's going to be very cute if I ever finish it. It's a good time. Is it a good time a year for plants? Because someone was saying that tomato plants are good this time here. So I'm going to get a little tomato plant. Great. For a bloody summertime of tomato goodness. Yeah, it's spring.

I love that. I'm questioning whether spring is a good time of plants. It's spring a good time for plants. Even my indoor plants, which have all been just doing nothing in the last few months. and now I'll just like, hey, I've got some new leaves. And I'm like, okay, welcome new leaves. What's up? Okay, well, I killed a little plant.

I've got a small courtyard and I piss on one of the plants. Because I thought that was good for them. It is full dead. And before I started pissing on it, it was thriving. I think you need to maybe get your piss, check. Why are you pissing outside? Was it a lemon tree? I think you could piss on lemon trees,

but I don't think you just piss on everything. If I'm out working the shed, what, are you going to go all the way into the house? What are you a maniac? If I'm out working in the shed, what are you doing? Fixing the car, are you, dad? We're recording a podcast. You didn't notice as I popped out for a whiz halfway through? That's funny.

Dave, do you want to bring it home? All right, let me bring it home with three of the bloody best here from Dronfield in Great Britain. I'd like to give a big shout out and thank you to Chris Whig. Oh, Whigsie. I wonder if he's got any connection to the Whigsphere. Knoxville, what a place. This episode was about Knoxville. No, was it?

No, that's Knoxville, Tennessee. What was this one about? This is Kentucky. Lexington. There's an X in Lexington and there's a K in Kentucky, and that was enough for my brain. And a little bit of white boy confidence, and I just went for it.

I reckon you've got to keep doing that U.S. state thing before you get to sleep every night. Yeah, I got a lot of work to do, I think. But Chris Whig, Matt, what is Chris Whig heisting? Chris Whig heisting priceless diamonds. Wow. Wow. Because they're worth nothing.

No, not the ones we were talking about. The ones that are actually, you know, the few, the top end, the 1% of the 1% of the 1% of diamonds that are actually valuable. Wow. That's what he's taking those big rocks. Cool. Hollywood-type diamonds. Not talking about mum and pop shop. Holy shit. Good on you, Chris. Weig actually heisting up a storm there.

Yeah. He's kind of putting everyone else to shame. His stuff is actually worth something. Sorry, everyone else. Sorry. On you, Chris, I would finally, no, not finally. I would also like to thank from Frederick in Maryland in the United States of America, Victoria Brun or Victoria Brun. Victoria, I've got to tell you, Maryland is the one that trips me up a bit.

It's one of the eight M states. That's the one that I will forget sometimes. But it's always so satisfying when I remember. It's got a great state flag. Does it? Yeah. A lot going on. Love that.

I'd have to give that a look. No, you won't. That sounded so sad. I'll have to give that a look. Just sound like a bored dad. Oh, yeah, I'll have to get that. Anyway. Well, actually, it's funny that you mention that because Victoria is heisting

miniature flags. Oh, wow. That's a cool one. The ones that go on the end of limousines. And that's where she's getting them. Yeah. Every time there's a... Well, that's dangerous.

Yeah. She's just like... Because there's always like... like CIA agents running alongside the car, obviously. So she just sort of runs along as well and just yanks. She gets it. She dresses up as a CIA agent. She's nearly got the whole set.

Whoa. How many countries are there again? Hapes. $1.996 or something? $196, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Four more. Can we make a few more countries?

Come on. Western Australia. It's that big. They've wanted to. The good news is that there's a bunch of other countries that no one else recognizes this country. So, Bob, if you personally want to recognize them, you could round it up to $200.

The moon! Yeah. I'm afraid that's an unincorporated territory of Denmark, So, God damn it. What about that one? We did a bonus episode on a while ago. Can we count that? Sealand.

Yeah. Sealand. But I was talking about the bonus. The South Australian one? Yeah. The Western Australian one. Hut River. Hut Valley.

Hot river. I've already forgotten. I only did that a few weeks ago. I talked about it on the radio a few hours ago. No, that was a while ago. We're in the same room together, I remember, Bob. That must have been a bit. Oh.

Good old days. Been a while. All. Been a while. I'd like to thank from a praisely in Scotland. Craig Mowett or Craig. I'd like to praise Lee like I should. Craig Mowit just in case.

I'll praise you. Of course, he is a heisting Fat Boy Slim memorabilia. Wow. What does that mean? There is a lot. There's a bubblehead. So not albums or anything, but all sort of the bullshit other stuff. I think Fat Boyer's.

He collects things with like smiley faces on them. That's one of his things. So he's stealing his collection of that as well. Oh, right. There's a poster of Christopher Walken from the film clip he was in. Posted notes that say stuff like things to do for Fat Boy Slim today. And then like dot points. That's all part of the collection.

Stolen by Craig from Scotland. Wow. Craig, you're a wily operator and I love it. I appreciate your own art form. That's a niche market, but he has got it covered. Good job, Craig. What is that song called that Christopher Walkins in? Weapons of mass destruction, is it?

Yeah. A weapon of choice. Weapon of choice. Craig Moward's weapon of choice. Heistin. So, Nick, does that bring us to the end? Oh no, we've actually got a few, just a couple of triptych inductees to come in this week. If you are signed up to support us for three years plus on the shoutout level, then you get inductees.

into the Triptitch Club. It's a very exclusive club where Jess normally comes up with a cocktail. She's behind the bar. I'm there assisting. I do the shaking part. Yeah. I don't do any of the stuff that measuring and stuff because I'm too much. I love free-pouring.

Can we do a free-pour one tonight, Jess? Yeah, all right. And then Dave's always booking a band as well. What are we drinking tonight? Tonight, well, we're eating Kentucky Fried Chicken. because this was set in Kentucky, right? Nice. Yeah, good.

Have I forgotten that already? Dave, help me brainstorm a drink that would go with chicken. Beer, probably. Or like something lemonade-y, like pub-squashy type of thing. Ooh, yeah, okay, yes. Like a vodka pub squash. Love that. Vodka lemon lime and bitters, so refreshing.

A lemon rushie. Yeah, a lemon rushkey with Kentucky fried chicken. Oh, this is great. Good stuff. And who are we going to be while we're chowen down? Well, you would not believe it. We've actually got Craig Mowett doing a DJ set where he's playing stolen Fat Boy Slim Records. Oh, all night.

Whoa. Wow. That's cool. Craig Moward on the decks. He's not even in the Triptage Club yet. So he's just in as a guest. Well, guest performer. Wow.

And then we, you know, we shuffle him out the back. As soon as you set's over. So he doesn't see anything. No mingling. That he's not yet to see. So there are, and Dave normally also works, not only books the bands, he also works as the hype man as you run in to the club, I'll lift the velvet rope.

Dave hyped you up as you come in. So we've got just the, hang on, what day is it today? Okay. Christmas Day? Carrie, the two. It is the 9th of September. Geez, the time moved so far. So we've got two inductees today from Stony Stanton in Leicestershire, Great Britain.

It's Nick Thompson. Oh, did somebody nick my unhappiness because you're here? Just in the nick of time. I mean, that's too good. Do you understand, Jess? That's too good. Yeah, sorry. I feel like maybe Jess takes over this role next week, Dave.

No, no, no, no. I've been told. And secondly, you've got nothing to work with here, Dave. You're fired from Homestead, Florida, and the United States. It's Aaron Land. Can't wait to take off. All right, fine. Fine.

Okay. Well, I thought that was pretty good. That is good. That is good. Dave, are you forfeiting the role? Yeah, Jess, if you want to do it. No, I don't want to do it. I don't want to do it.

I love watching Dave. It's the best. Come on Dave. I'll give you another run up here. How many more? How many more? This is the last one. From Homesteads, Florida.

In the United States, it's Aaron land. Touchdown! Is she land? That's fair. Yeah. All right. You got the job. You can keep it.

Mainly because Jess doesn't want it. But still, that brings us to the end of the episode. Thanks so much for listening. This was a bit of a longer one, I think. This could be the longest one ever, do you think? No, I think, oh, I don't know. Anyway, but it's been fun. And we've learned a lot, we've laughed a lot, we've lived a lot.

Great story. A wild story. Thank you, Matt. Well done. Thank you so much. I think once all the ums and ours are edited out, this will be down on a nifty 45 minutes. And, yeah, I guess, Dave, people should just stay tuned on the bookcheat feed. Hopefully you'll have one coming out soon.

Yeah, that's right. Primates still coming out with recaps. of the Umbrella Academy where me and Evan are going back and watching those episodes. And the new episode of Listen Now will have just come out about the classic dad rock band accidentally came out on Father's Day evening, diastrates, and their album Brothers in Arms. And yeah, that was a real fun episode. So check all that stuff out. It falls on the social media.

Where are we again, Bob? We do go on pod on everything and at gmail. and dot com. Yes. Can't get her on. With that seamless explanation, you should be able to find us very easily. There'll be links in the show notes.

It's the same with the YouTube channels also do go on pod. It's all do go on pod. Anyway, what a pleasure it's been. Always so good to hang out with you two, my obvious friends. Dave, boot us out. Boot us home.

Well, thanks so much for listening. And until next week, I will say thank you and goodbye. Later. Bye. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. I mean, if you want, it's up to you.

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