Do Go On - 268 - The Guinness Book Of Records (With Cameron James & Alexei Toliopoulos)

Episode Date: December 9, 2020

This week we are joined by our friends / the 16th and 17th best investigative journalists that the ABC has, Cameron James and Alexei Toliopoulos! Their new podcast, Finding Desperado, is based on a fact Cam found in the Guinness Book Of Records, and he's come in to tell us about the origin story of that wonderful, weird book. This is a super fun episode with an array of characters (played by Alexei) and a lot of moments that will make you go "...what??"Check out Finding Drago/ Finding Desperado: http://bit.ly/FindingDragoBuy tickets to our live streamed shows:https://sospresents.com/catalogSupport the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: patreon.com/DoGoOnPodBuy tickets to our streamed shows (there are 8 available to watch now! All with exclusive extra sections): https://sospresents.com/authors/dogoonCheck out our web series: https://www.youtube.com/user/stupidoldchannel Submit a topic idea directly to the hat: dogoonpod.com/Submit-a-TopicTwitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: [e-mail] out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader Thomas Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey everybody, Jess and Dave, just jumping in really quickly at the top here to make sure that you are across all the details for our upcoming Christmas show. That's right, we are doing a live show in Melbourne Saturday December the 2nd, 2023, our final podcast of the year, our Christmas special. It's downstairs at Morris House, which usually be called the European beer cafe. On Saturday December the 2nd, 2023 at 4.30pm, come along, come one, come all, and get tickets at doogawonpod.com. At Nordstrom, you can shop the best holiday gifts for everyone you love.

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Multitask right now. Quote today at Progressive.com. Progressive casualty and trans company and affiliates, National Average 12 Month Savings of $744 by new customer surveyed, who saved with progressive between June 2022 and May 2023. Potential savings will vary, discounts not available in all safe and situations. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. Hello and welcome to another episode of Dugo1. My name is Dave Warnke and as always I'm here with Jess Perkins and Matt Stewart. Hello, I'm Jess Perkins.

Hi, I'm Matt Stewart. It's so good to be here and we're not the only ones here are we Dave. No, because you're Jess, you're Matt, I'm Dave, and they are from Finding Desperado, I guess this week, it's Cameron James and Alexi, Tolly, Yopolis, hello. Hello, hello, hello, and hello, Alexi. Hello, I'm Alexi, the other guy was Cameron. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Thank you for having us on your podcast, and I don't want to like tell too many tales outside of school, but it was a real struggle to get started I come on half an hour to figure out so I really appreciate all the work you guys have put into this and it takes half an hour Every week we've done this for 260 weeks That's like half our lives in the studio

Calling Evan plugging in, plugging in, calling Evan. Well, at least it proves that you guys, you may be beautiful podcasters, but you're not freaking nerds, okay? The text side does not come naturally. No way. But I know how to dunk a basketball. That's exactly a fucking chess quarter. That's hell.

That's the two coolest thing. What's the third coolest thing. What's the third coolest thing? Do it on Ollie? Wow. Who's Ollie? That is cool. That is cool.

Sex and sexism. I probably think... Kami probably don't know this. But Jess and Dave are virgins and they often try and sort of fake it till they make it, but try and cover up a lot. No, I've done it. I have. Me too.

No? Well, Alexa and I are famously sluts, so this makes for an interesting combination on the podcast. Yes, so much to learn. As Lotharios around our city. Sordman. Yes, we are. We are known as the legendary pantsman of this Australian podcasting industry. So watch out.

We have got some interesting tales about our tales. That's not a front or a point. Oh no. Oh no. And you test the lead. They're all extremely true. No, we can't ruin this podcast. We're both such fans of this show. We don't want to ruin it with smut and film.

Jess and I also have a podcast called Desperado. It's about something completely different. You do make some of our favorite podcasts, but the one you've been working on lately, what's it's deal? What a wonderful question. It's called finding. Finding. Desperado. Finding? Desperado. I've listened to the first episode three times because I was drinking and I just could not remember when I, what happened after? Listen to it again and then, yeah, anyway, I don't know why I'm telling you that, but I remember enjoying it each time.

Just don't remember any of the details. Well Matt, we're so flattered. Thank you so much. We'll listen to the podcast three times. Yeah, we specifically designed this series for sober listening. So in fact, there's a warning at the start that says, if you have any alcohol in your mouth, you have to spit it out before the podcast starts. It's not appropriate. We jam stuff in.

We jam info in. We jam jokes in. We jam in references to Ray Romano, we're getting it all in there. That's what we really wanted to get the word out about Ray Romano. But the new series is, it's another true crime, Esk podcast without a crime, and it is all true.

And we are trying to track down the elusive mysterious filmmaker Sydney Ling, who once held the Guinness World Record for World's Youngest Filmmaker of a feature film. But in our research, we begin to suspect that this film that won a Guinness World Record does not exist. There's no evidence that it exists anywhere on the internet. And that's when things start to get a little bit freaky and it's touch deaky. We border on the deaky on this new series. And it's really exciting for that reason. And it's on the same feed as your first podcast in the similar vein.

That's right. Finding that. They desperately. What was the name of the dragon? Very similar name. We picked, we picked a word that was similar. Yeah. So people would be like, Oh, cool. Must be a brand recognition. Yes.

And the recognition. Exactly. So people, people aren't aware of the new one. They may as well go back and start from the beginning because you can definitely listen to one and then bang out the second. And you'll be glad you did it this way because I'll listen to both as they're coming out and it's brutal waiting week to week for the next episode. If you're going to, they're all out and you can binge them. I'm very jealous of you.

Wait, you know what? I think by the time this podcast comes out, they will all be out. So people can binge it. And they can binge drink after they've bingeed it. Do not do them at the same time. You've already seen how that does not lead to success. But feel free to get smashed afterwards. I think the way, the way, maybe I remember is one of you said, and this made me laugh real, in bed, late at night,

a bit drunk, and one of you said that Leonardo DiCaprio was your favorite Italian actor. LAUGHTER Well, that was me, and that is a line that I stole from. I went on one of those star tours in LA, you know where they're like, you get in a bus and they, you know where they're like, you're getting a boss and they drive you around all the Hollywood homes.

And the guy that was doing it was giving trivia for all the actors before he revealed their names. And he was like, this next guy, he lives with his mother, he's the most famous Italian actor in the world. Anyone guess who it is? And everyone was like, Robert De Niro, like just yelling at Italian. Robert Ovenini, like yelling at all these names. Ray Romano, Ray Romano.

He lives across the road from each mother, but maybe they moved in. And then when he said Leonardo DiCaprio, I was with Naomi Higgins at the time, and we both lost our minds, just like, what? They had never occurred to me that Leonardo DiCaprio, probably the most Italian name, is an Italian man. And ever since then, I've paid my respects to the man. Yeah, you got to spread that information. Is the best Italian actor in the biz. It all came out of a Guinness World Record entry.

Is that right? Yes, yes. Both of us actually were quite obsessed with the Guinness Book of Records when we were kids. It was just one of those fun stories around. Did you guys have them when you were like, yeah, so many. I definitely have the, getting one year,

the 1999 Guinness World Records for Christmas. Oh yeah, it was a classic stuff. You get it on Christmas day and auntie would give it to you or something and then you'd read it all Christmas afternoon and then never touch it again as long as you would. I never owned one but they were a hot item at the primary school library. Yeah, for sure, for sure. I think it's one of those things where they say that they actually hold a record itself as the most stolen book from the library. Really?

That's how popular they are. I don't know if thought people would be stealing like porno's or something. Yeah. What library are you going to in porno? It's a library that's just like, it's a tom floor of a little shop in the city and it's just one guy that works there

he's a librarian. Do not go downstairs it's really weird. I actually know what the most stolen book from Australian libraries is. What is it? It is looking for Alibrandron, the my favorite book. Is that true? That's true. It's stolen from the most high school libraries. I've seen, I stole my copy from my high school library as well. That's one of the reasons I know it. How many copies did you steal to get the numbers up? Just that one, babe. Didn't need my help. It did on its own. You stole it and then you got Mollie. Did you get Malina my cat adab sign it for you? Yes, and PM Miranda. I got my Bible sign by Jesus and God.

Do they still say like property of whatever? Yeah, it was actually a little embarrassing that that's the one copy I had. So, uh, you said you called yourselves fans of this show. So you probably know how it works, but for new listeners, there's probably plenty who follow you guys around the podcast scene. They listen every podcast from. So we might have a few new listeners who are here, big Lex and Cam fans. And for them, the way this show works is normally one of Jess Dave and I does a report on a topic

of research, the other two don't know much about. But this week, cam's come in and he's gonna give us a report on a topic, I know what it is, but I don't think Dave or Jess do. Oh, no. So we normally, I don't know if you've organized a question, Cam, no stress if you haven't, but we normally get on a topic with a question

about the topic. Okay, I have a question that will hopefully give a little bit of a clue as to what the topic is. What is the most stolen book from Larmans that isn't looking for Alibrandi? Pawn. Oh, I'm kidding. I forgot I was born. Now I'm gonna be right the review. Hang on,

no, no, no, I am gonna tell you what the answer is. The answer is of course the worldwide publishing phenomenon Guinness book of records. Awesome. It's so funny because I thought you're gonna do it about the beer, but this makes more sense, actually. It makes a lot more sense. It makes more on bread, isn't it? Yeah. Did I, sorry, sorry, did I accidentally give away the fact that started this, you know,

whoops, sorry about that. The most dull thing, sorry about that. I had no idea what you were going to talk about. I tried to throw you off the scent. I tried so hard to throw you off the cent. But, you know, I ran out of Alabrandi facts very quickly. Yeah, we got the name of the book, the name of the author, and one of the actors from the film,

nothing else can be said about it, unfortunately. No, we're going to go deep on the Guinness Book of Records today, guys. I want to tell you everything about it, because Alexi and I obviously our new podcast is a little bit about that book and about a specific record from that book. But also we have very strong opinions about Guinness that we have not been allowed to put on our own podcasts. Have you been silenced by the big dogs?

We have been silenced by not only Guinness, but tragically the Australian Broadcasting Corporation have said that we are not allowed to be libelous or slanderous towards the Guinness organisation, but you are absolutely happy to bring that libel suit to our podcast. Absolutely. I think it's fine coming from you guys. You know, this is Indie. We can't do it from the government, from the Gulf, but we can do it from an Indie label like you guys. That's okay. I think we just cover our asses.

I mean, I just did my ABC defamation training just the other day. So I think if we just say allegedly a lot, we're fine. Okay. Allegedly. That's good. That's good. That's what Kenis can allegedly kiss my freaking ass. No. That's true. They can allegedly kiss my frickin ass. Oh! Oh!

That's true. They can allegedly do that because we have been up to our frickin eyeballs with Guinness over the last like year basically. And I want to say that they have been a very allegedly very very difficult organization to work with. It kind of all started because we very before we even started recording the podcast, we were reaching out to them to ask them about this specific record that we wanted information about. And I went legit first up.

I went straight to the PR team and said, can you give us some information about this? I asked them below specific questions and they just pretty much wrote back straight up, no, we do not give out any information because of data breach. We don't want to give out any of our data and all this kind of shit. Just like absolute.

Oh, absolutely. Allegedly they suck. Yeah, absolutely. Pish posh coming from these guys. So then we did a little bit of investigative journalism They suck. Yeah, absolutely. Pish posh coming from these guys. So then we did a little bit of investigative journalism and we found the name of an adjudicator for Guinness because her name was in an article in the paper and I stalked her on social media.

Allegedly Cameron stalked them on the channel. Good. I want to cover your side too, Cameron. Yeah. And try to get in touch with their own like all platforms. She ignored them. But then a friend of ours in the biz tracked down her phone number. We called her and she was very polite over the phone. We're like, hey, we're podcasts. We're from the ABC. We're doing a podcast about a Guinness record. We know you're in a judicator. We'd love to pick your brains a little bit. And she was very polite. And she was like, Oh, I'm just in the middle of cooking dinner. I'll call you back after dinner. And can I just say the call never came back? This is a lady time. It's very, very confronting. So then a few days after that,

the PR team reached out to us again. So obviously she's gone back and snitched to them and been like, look, these fucking nerds. They're totally lost alone. They've lost a meal with my social media and somehow got my phone number. And the PR team are like, we'll try and collaborate with you.

So give us any more questions, any more, any way we can help we will. We wrote down a very specific list of things we wanted, and they wrote back again, basically saying, no, we cannot. So that's when we realized that the only way to ensure contact with Guinness is if we apply for a Guinness world record, that way we'll have to talk to these fricking guys. We have to go in on the inside.

And what was the record we were going to apply for, Alexi? We were playing for me to be considered for World's youngest podcaster. And we looked it up. There's way younger podcasters out there. But they did not try to go for the record. Yeah, there's no record for it. So if you go in... I'm setting the bar.

I'm setting up. And it can immediately be beat by the nine year old that has a podcast in Canada or whatever. But if you start it, you know, exactly, you get something to work towards. Exactly. Have any of you guys ever applied for a Guinness World record before? I have. Oh, for your show. I did your show years ago.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. So that was about five years ago. At the Melbourne French Festival, I applied to do the longest ever variety show that I hosted with Adam Knox. We had a lot of people come perform. Thank you so much for donating your time.

Unfortunately, so it was this whole thing we have to reply. They give you all this rules or this criteria. And we had guys here from stupid old Evan and Beck came out they had to film everything so there was no breaking the tape You have to send them a massive file. I think it ended up going for nearly a 13 hours or something and there's all these rules like as MCs We could only be on for four minutes or so. So you can't go up and just do an hour long Yeah, you got to keep change you keep changing keep changing and just do an hour long. You've got to keep changing, keep changing, keep changing. And unfortunately, it takes so long for them to assess the record. By the time we got the footage and everything over there, they said, oh, sorry, someone in New York just did it for 24 hours. I'm a little bit of a priest.

Probably Chris Gethard or someone like that, who just snaked it from you. Yeah, it was allegedly they do so. I remember doing your, it was during Melbourne Comedy festival, I think, you had the World Record show and I went for most temporary tattooed man. And you went off into a little bathroom for about 45 minutes throughout the whole show, bringing you one at the end and you would discover in these crappy little cheap tattoos that we'd supplied you. And it wasn't that impressive because you had like, you had like a hundred sheets of these things, but they still only covered just my chest and back, I think, nothing else.

So it wasn't that impressive. I'm sure I've got a photo somewhere, I'll post that in the screen of you. I think there's a couple, at least a couple of new faces. Yeah, you're right. I think I've got that too. And from memory, oh no, maybe this is a tale out of school, but I heard, is it true that Greg Larson went for a record first person to spontaneously? Do you remember? It was, um, fastest time to get an erection without touching yourself and then playing Baker Street on saxophone.

Andy Matthews, who Adam and I also co-hosted at So With, is very handy that we all know that and he built a, a soundproof booth that Greg sat in on stage which covered his lower half. It was like watching someone sitting in a shed and he was sick to see the audience with the whole show watching this guy. Trying to wheel and erect him without touching himself. And then he just had to kick down the door and start playing. And then he played it and then he just slung back into the shit and closed the door. It was so funny. Oh my god.

So he made it happen. Yeah, well he made something happen. I don't know if he called it a full erection. We paid it. Everyone's a buddy, critic, right? Yes. Well, they're very difficult to deal with Guinness. We did the same thing.

We went through the application process, which takes forever. And you have to pay like five pounds just to apply. And then they say to read your assessment, we'll get back to you within like six months or something. It's something absurd, like this long period of time. But then they go, or we will get back to you in nine business days if you pay this fast track fee, which is $1,000 non-refinable. Oh my God. So you can do that. Did the people at the ABC pay? We asked them. Flat out, God, I know. Flat out.

Oh, come on. And I even put in that first five pounds and they still put in the rest. Yeah. Oh, that's it. It was a thousand dollars US or something too, wasn't it? It was something great. So it was even more. And then even then if you get fast tracked with that grant, non-refundable, they can still

get back to you in nine business days and say, we're actually doing good. That's good. There's a nine-year-old kid that has a podcast in Canada, so you know, it's not going to happen for you, dude. Like an insane. There are allegedly quite a racket. So we want it to kind of give you a bit of a thorough history of those guys today. And hopefully that will give your listeners and our listeners

if they're listening to this. A full portrait of what this company is and what they stand for and why they suck a letter. That's what we're going to do for you guys. Do they have nothing to do with the bird? I'm so glad you asked, because that will be answered in my report. Okay, great, fantastic. And you get all the way through and you just say,

nothing to do with the game. But don't show it now. You're like with sedatives. I'm looking forward to this. I know, I really know nothing about it. No, better. But you do like the beer. Yeah, it's okay.

Okay. Allegedly it's an okay beer. No, that's right. I mean, I like stout, but I don't know. It's bad, it's very full. It's just such a full, full beer. It's a meal. It's a meal.

It's a meal. I like it. I own occasion, but I preferred nearly all other stats because I we got that on the record because if that's going to offend some of the some of the Irish listeners probably someone someone had a girl with me once I posted a photo drinking a stout in a glass and ego he commented if you if you if someone served a stout in that glass in Ireland they would be killed If someone served a stout in that class in Ireland, they would be killed. Wow. Maybe during the troubles.

But I don't know what's going on. I don't know if any of this is going on. People who are wrapped up in some pastry and cooked in the oven eat it like a pie. A daybornicky style. Yeah, I have that. The best thing about Guinness is a Guinness, a beefing Guinness pie. Oh yeah. Absolutely.

That's a great cooking ingredient, no doubt. So I've got two of your opinions on Guinness, the beverage. Yes, what's yours? On the beverage? Yeah. It's fine. Great.

I think I've had a sip. I've had a sip. I've gone, oh, yeah, but done it. All right, should I launch into the report? Yeah. Let's do it. Are you, should I launch into the report? Yeah. Let's do it. Are you guys ready? It's so ready.

I'm prepared. Alexia, are you ready? I am. I actually have been waiting quite some time for you to start reading Cameron. Okay, here we go. Okay. The pale sun rises on a chilly autumn Irish morning.

The morning is Irish because we are in Ireland. I've written this more like a short story than a report. That's not that short. A long story, if you will. A blessed part of this earth that is equal parts prehistoric rock, smoky Celtic mysticism, and also the place where the band U2 is from. A thin mist, lingers hesitantly over the frozen ground, like the foamy head of a tall pint of Guinness. For shadowing? Almost certainly. Where are we?

We are in a place called North Slob. An area of mud flaps at the estuary of the river Slainy. And a place that definitely could have had a name rethink. North Slob. North Slob area. I have a lot of mud flaps at the same sentence. My God, I'm in heaven right now. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, 1951. Six years after WWII, five years before Elvis Presley first swiveled those hips on Ed Sullivan, all in all, a time when music and culture officially sucked us. The Irish Morning Silence is broken by a solitary gunshot. Piyu!

A flutter. wings take off from the reeds in panic. The bullet hits nothing but thick Irish air. We're in Ireland. The bullet came from a nearby shooting party, a group of upper-crust, wealthy gentlemen who regularly participate in the hyper-masculine activity of strolling around the countryside shooting guns at little birdies. The men in the party all begin laughing in unison. All except for one man. That man's name was Sir Hugh Beaver, the managing director of Guinness Breweries. So Matt, that should answer your question. Yeah, they're involved. His name is one letter of huge Beaver. Okay, you're definitely not a virgin.

Not like that. Thank you, that's right. The actual first Guinness World Record was for Worlds biggest vagina. And actually, it was just gone. Worlds. You mentioned it. And again, the patriarchy took it. So it's typical of 50s. The fellas were all laughing at Sir Hugh Beaver because he had missed his shot at the easy target of a nearby golden plover, which I've read as a type of bird.

Sir Hugh, every inch the absolute rich can't you're imagining, it can instantly furious at their mockery and started an argument. For the remainder of this report, the part of Sir Hugh Beaver will be played by Alexei Toljopoulos. Let's see that. Your line. How dare you laugh at me. I'm one of the best shots not only in this part, but in all these mud flats.

I only missed a shot because the Golden Clovers actually the fastest gamebird in the world, okay? Someone else popped up saying that they believe the red grass was actually the fastest gamebird in the world, but so he replied, no, no, no, it's definitely the golden plumber. The other guy said, no, it's the red grass. Absolutely not. It's the golden plumber. That's the fast bird in the land for goodness' cakes.

And that's the only reason I missed a shell, okay? I promise you that. And the other guy said, no, it's actually the red grass and they went back and forth. I mean, this is the kind of argument that only rich people can have. I don't know if any of you guys have ever argued over grass versus plumber speed wise, but it's never come up in my life before. Not in relation to speed, no. Oh, okay.

To plume it, of course. To plume it, of course. To plume it, of course. To plume it, of course. To plume it, of course. To plume it, of course. To plume it, of course. To plume it, of course. To plume it, of course. To plume it, of course. To plume it, of course. What about in your family? Oh yeah, the plumage and the The

Big Most fucker Yeah, yeah, well it's pick us the jyna on the It's Actually a cloaca and they're all incredibly humongous That's true and the cloaca Alexi is what exactly? It is the both features, both holes on the birdadainous and the punani. So you got a bit too technical there, you lost me. Oh my god. So they're arguing.

Refusing to back down, so Hugh dragged the entire shooting party back to the nearby Castle Bridge Manor and insisted they spend the afternoon looking up reference books and ornithological texts in the vast library in order to prove once and for all which bird was the fastest. Imagine if you were at this party, what an absolute piece of shit is going. Completely railroading the whole afternoon like no, no, no, back to the library. Well, Lexi would be sitting there with like the reference book, but inside it looking for Alibrandi's. Wow. We're looking for Alib brandy, but we found a friend.

They didn't find an answer, but so Hugh Beaver found an idea, an idea that would become a worldwide publishing phenomenon, which is a phrase that I've already said, and is also a phrase that the Guinness World Records website says over and over again, like five or six times on every page, there are for themselves as a worldwide publishing phenomenon. So Hugh Beaver exclaimed, Eureka, I have an idea for a reference book

that will feature all the answers to questions that people argue about over dinner at the pub, or while shooting little birds. And they're friends. This will be an encyclopedia, but before facts and trivia. It will be a book of records. That was wonderful performance. Thank you so much. I've been doing a lot more acting this year, so I don't have management, but just DM me on Instagram or Twitter and I will likely act in your TV show, but no, she films. So Hugh knew instantly that he was on to a once in a lifetime stroke of genius idea.

This sort of thing didn't exist. There was no trivial pursuit. There was no Ripley's believe it or not starring Dean Kane. There's no way that this wouldn't be a hit. He was so certain of his ideas, potential success, that he instantly forgot about it for four entire years. That is... That is quite... That is quite Olympia. That's right. That's right. And you know, I don't know what he did in those four years, but there's a huge gap on the Guinness history page and everywhere.

I looked everywhere and it just doesn't tell you what he did in that time. Not a lot of birds. It would have been shooting birds. Yeah, you know, he went back out by himself and just shot. He took it out on all those golden plums. Yeah. They got fucked up. Oh, no. They're actually out on all those golden plums. They got fucked up.

They're actually extinct now, strangling them. Four years later, so Hugh Beaver was in yet another argument. This time inside a pub, this time about who the fastest marathon runner in the world was. He exclaimed out loud, if only there was some kind of book behind the bar that could settle this argument once and for all, a book that would settle all pub arguments, a book that people could read while sipping a delicious foamy room temperature, Guinness beer, and be amazed at the strength of the human spirit. After he said this, he remembered that he'd already thought of this idea. And

he decided then and there to finally make his dream project a reality. I'm going to take a little side by here for a second. This is something that I think maybe Matt would be interested in. You're a bit of a big guy. You love getting up amongst the hops and the ale and the barley and the sugar and the bolts, the bones. And glasses. The glasses. The drinks. Yeah, I love you.

Yeah, yeah. I'm out of the tap. I pour them out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap.

I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out of the tap. I'm out a beer tap. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You love that sort of stuff. I love that some of that stuff, yeah. Now, I don't know if you know this, but Guinness as a beer company back in the olden days, they didn't have their own venues or pubs

or anything like that. Did you know that, Matt? I didn't know, I didn't know that. Well, maybe you should have read for it. I'm a poor and absolute lesson today. Maybe you won't run your mouth so much next time. I'm not. About Guinness.

They did not. They didn't own any pubs or license venues at all. So whereas other beers at the time, they could sell their own product in their own pubs, Guinness relied exclusively on advertising to try and get people to drink their disgusting, thick, dark, good, that they call a beer. They used, I had a lot of crazy advertising back in the day

that had a two-can drinking a beer. Imagine that. That's pretty fun. Yeah. I guess it's just, you still see all their old ads around for some reason. You've seen that? My goodness, my goodness.

Yep, that's one of them. Yeah, yeah. You see it around, like people's, like how like you know my parents sort of friends age How they all have these kind of things? Yeah, I'm probably extrapolating from one person I mean to that generation it's the height of wet to have a little Guinness slogan up there. They think it's extremely funny.

It is funny. That was funny. There's one with an ostrich with a Guinness glass halfway down its long neck. Oh my God. That's a lot of animals trying to drink beers and they're advertising. To be honest, that is actually funny to me. To imagine an animal drinking a beer is pretty funny.

They're most famous ad at the time was a giant billboard with a drawing of a pint glass on it that was empty and a slogan in all caps that said, Guinness is good for you. And I just love back then when you could just say whatever the fuck you wanted it and add and people like okay. No, not out of 10 doctors agree. That's sort of like smoking yourself. You're at some shit. Yeah, amazing. They don't have actual doctors on on TV. So smoking will and they'll say it in their doctors labs or whatever. They'd say to people, if you're pregnant, you want to go menthol. Give that baby a little cool breeze down south from the middle cigarette. So Hugh Beaver thought, if he could put a book of pub trivia with the Guinness logo on the front cover in every pub, it would be free advertising and they might even make a

couple of bucks from drunk idiots who'd buy the book. He knew that he'd finally come up with the greatest idea of his life, an idea that could eventually become a worldwide publishing phenomenon. He was so determined this time that he only forgot about it for one more year. He only forgot about it for one more year. Again, there's another gap here on the, I don't know what happened in that year. Not a full Olympiad, so I don't know what he did. Commonwealth game. Yeah, they do those every year, I reckon.

It was on. Okay, let's skip ahead. We're skipping ahead a year now. The camera. There was a, there's another universe universe where Guinness World Record book was called Beaver's Big Book of Facts of Summer. They're not like, he must have thought of that going it for himself. He was big book of facts. And it was just him making up shit that he believes. It's all just, he says like you may think that this is the strongest man in the world,

but actually the Golden Plumber much stronger, okay? Golden Plumber was the most perfect bird. It was a Barmi October English evening. The evening is English because we are in England now in the story. So we've moved locations for those of you who can't keep up. I'm a little lost cam. We're in England. Okay. And it's London calling or something like that. So we know where we are. So I note to your producer, I'd chucked in London calling here, or maybe some back or back or something. or maybe some back or act or something. Yeah.

So Hugh Beevil was at a dinner party where he had a chance in counter with not one, but two experts on facts, figures and records who could be the perfect people to help him bring his dream book to life. These two men were Norris and Ross McWirter, two straight, two twins, and nerds from England. The McWirtor twins.

The McWirtors were nationally known sports journalists in the United Kingdom. They were sort of the Ray Barone of their time. Ray Barone is a character that Ray Romano plays in everybody loves Raymond. Alexei Tolyopoulos now is going to give us a little bit of a backstory on Ray Barone. Thank you, Alexei. Born October 9th, 1958, Raymond Albert or Ray Barone is the titular and main character of everybody loves Raymond and the show thus focuses with centrality on Ray.

He's the husband of Deborah, the brother of Robert, the father of Ali, Michael, and Jeffrey. Who are twins like the McQuirter brothers? And he's also the obedient son of Frank and Marie Barone. He appears in over 210 episodes of Everybody Loves Raymond and one episode of The Nanny, where he plays a former high school colleague of Fran Dresher. Do you want me to do one on The Nanny as well?

Tolkien, I can't believe I have the context of the Nanny. The Nanny is a show starring and credited by Fran Dresher. It takes place in Queens for a few minutes of the first episode. Then from there, she's taking taking home her work as a product shop and leaves, flushing and then becomes a nanny cat, the Sheffield residents.

The Sheffield is our family that is one dad, three kids, a butler and a friend of the family that works at the house as well, called CC. There is no mom, I think she's dead. Thank you. Thank you. So yeah, the McWhorter twins are kind of like that. The McWhorter's?

I get it now. Yeah, sort of like Ray Barone. And the McWhorter loves these guys. Yeah, everybody loves them around England at the time. The book could have been called McWhorter Beaver's Big Book of Fast. Yeah, this is like, it feels like a lost opportunity. Oh, come on. Oh, bro.

The McWirters were known for their previously published sports trivia book, their photographic memories, their knowledge of all world history, and much later for their conservative politics, which would tragically lead to one of the twins being assassinated by the IRA. But don't worry, I won't get into that part of the story. So Hugh Beaver invited the McWorders to his stately manner for a luncheon. The table is set with silver tankers of piping hot Guinness

beer and potions of sherry. They're boiling. They bring it to the boil and then they pour it into a silver tank. Delicious. I'm generally driving a Guinness right now. I don't know if it's your descriptions or what, or just knowing how, how much they've fucked you guys over recently. Better put the kettle on, Put a kettle on your stomach.

The juicy steaks are served with mountains of mashed potatoes, gravy, onions, and fresh beans. This was only two months after the end of rationing in the UK. So the McWorders are eating like kings for the first time in their lives probably. I mean, these are humble sports journalists. They don't normally eat stuff like this. So if you beaver, however, only eats a single apple during this luncheon. Instead, he watches these two twins gorge themselves on his sumptuous feast. He didn't know it at the time, but by watching two twins eat mountains of food He was unlocking a kink within him that he could never put back in the cage

I mean I've taken creative license with that. I don't know. He did apparently only eat an apple during the lunch But in my mind. I'm a power move Beg a pardon. Do you think that was a power move? Beg a pardon? Do you think that was a power move? I think so. He's like, yeah, you guys eat all this shit. I'm just gonna sit here and munch a crisp apple in front of you guys.

Is there anything in his future that points to the fact that a kink was unlocked there? He makes mukbang videos on YouTube. Yeah, he invents mukbang shortly after this. Alexey, you're talking to two thirds of a room of versions here. Then I'm going to understand what that means. Explain it for their benefit. Well, it's a YouTube phenomenon that I dream of one day taking part in, where it's just people gorging themselves on lots of different

foods, and there's some sort of a rhodicism around it as well. Yeah, is it erotic? Like, are they being sexy when they do? Incredibly so. I mean, though, not particularly, but, you know, people watch videos on the internet, you can't blame them for what happens to them, and they're chemicals within their body, you know? Hmm, yes.

I mean, if Greg Larsen can conjure an erection, she will power. And Lord knows what fellow could do with a mukbang video. Okay. Before the twins have even had a chance to digest their first few bites of delicious angus beef, so Hugh Beaver begins launching questions at them and and much to both of their surprise, they answer them all correctly. Alexi is going to play so Hugh Beaver and both of them were to twins for this moment. Okay, I'm going to try two different voices for these. Okay. So this is Mr. Beaver asking the

questions in the voice that I've already given to this character. Who gave the longest filler buster, Wayne, more than 24th, 19th, 23, 22, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, 23, on Instagram or Twitter. I will act in TV shows. I will not do any student or short films. How about feature films? I would do a feature if it has a budget, but if it's just a couple of mates pointing at me for one and a half hours while I eat my phone style. Have you guys done and you I don't think you have. You should do an episode on flagpole sitting. That was the record that Alexi just said there

is the McWerters. Did you know that was an actual trend in the 20s? It was like, it became popular for people to climb up flagpoles and just sit on the top of them and see how long they could last. And did it, was the record there 50 days? Yeah, one guy got 51 days and 20 hours. The previous record, remember?

That was 13 hours. He smashed it. That's embarrassing. Wow. There was a song in the Noonies or a Black Cross. It was a heavy danger. Is it a heavy danger? Yeah, so I didn't know that was, didn't realise what that was referencing.

Yeah, the popular trend flag ball sitting. How shit did the 20 sound? We have come across that a lot in the show where we'll talk about something happening in the old days and the whole town turns out for it. Whatever it is. It's like some kid has been lost for a couple of days. He's found the whole town turns out there's fire twirlers and stuff like that They wait like six days in the snow to see a train go by for eight seconds

Oh my god Yeah, once there were with triplets or whatever the fire version of triplets is and yeah people came from around the world to see him Sorry, the We're seeking you are the the fire version of triplets. Yeah Is that 15 or? Hey, you got what you got? You know, single kids, you got normal. You got normal. Triple 50 and normal.

Double. I put it on two. Double kids. Double kids. Then you got triples. Yeah. Then you got quadrupeds and then you got the five version of triplets. Yeah.

Yeah. Actually, now that you've said it, I realized I don't even know what the word is for the five version of triplets. Yeah, actually, now that you've said it, I realize I don't even know what the word is for the five version of triplets. He's a quintuplet. Quintuplet. Quintuplet. Wow. One of my favorite directors. A bit clunky. The twins run phased by this grilling and successfully answer every single question. So then, so Hugh Beaver brings in his entire board of directors for the Guinness company, and they all start firing off questions while the McWord is moved on from steak and veggies to probably trifle and custard or boys and very cheesecake or macarons or something fancy. So that's all they, well, are they waiting in the wings to come out?

Yeah, there must have been in another room. And he opens up double doors, I'm imagining, and then like 10 people file in, and they all have their own questions ready to go. What's the most exciting movie of all time? What's the coolest movie? Donnie, okay, Donnie Darko. Go it written down now. Yeah.

But Norris and Rosmic Wurto didn't miss a beat and got every answer correct. After the last sloppy scraps of jam, cream and scones were gone, so she, I'm making up what they ate. But those scones there, what was the order? Did it go, scone then jam then cream? Now I think you do, I mean I'll tell you what I do. I do jam first and then I pop dairy on top. Am I correct?

Fantastic. Correct. Absolutely. Give us one record for my perfect scone. Thank you. Yeah. People that put cream on first, I think you're just fucking the knife up and I don't, I don't really like that one bit.

Thank you. Yeah. Probably a cream quality issue. Cam. So that's probably what's happening. Do you cream first? Get a thick, get a thicker cream. That's crazy to put jam on last.

No, Alexi, do you guys have scones in Greek? Yeah, we do. Okay, we put freaking yogurt on them. Okay, not cream. We do yogurt and honey, okay? It's quite numb. That makes it that same word. That sounds awesome.

That sounds delicious. After the last sloppy scraps of scones were gone, so Hugh Beaver was convinced that these two know-it-all freaky-deaky twins were just the guys for the job. He told them to make their way to his accounts department at Guinness Head Office and ask for as much money as they wanted to get a book out within the year. I just realized how scary it is that there's these two twins that just know everything. That's scary wasn't twins that just know everything. That's scary. That's a big one. They know the answer to every question

and they just share this knowledge between them. That's more suspicious to me that there's something like a theory on otherworldly going on here. Yeah, and the IRA was so intimidated that they blew one of them up. Yeah, a little bit later on. We'll get to that, but I might skip over it, because it is a bit sad.

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Hey Dave, you're ready. Since we founded Bombas, we've always said our socks, underwear, and t-shirts are super soft. Any new ideas? Maybe sublimely soft or disgustingly cozy. Wait, what? I got it. Bombas, absurdly comfortable essentials for yourself and everyone on your list. And for those facing homelessness, because one purchase equals one donated. Wow, did we just write an ad? Yes. Bombas, big comfort for everyone. Go to bombas.com slash a cast and use code a cast for 20% off your first purchase. and use code ecast for 20% off your first purchase. They officially started the company, Guinness Superlatives,

one of the great business names, and opened an office on Fleet Street, London, and embarked on an exhaustive 13 and a half week research phase as they put together what would become the first Guinness Book of Records published 27 August 1955. Now, everyone, I want you to go around the room and guess how many copies they've sold together what would become the first Guinness Book of Records published 27 August 1955. Now everyone I want you to go around the room and guess how many copies they sold on the first run. 30,000. Not bad. 15,000. Just as the closest They're called zero copies

So we'll be The idea that he would give every copy away to all the pubs in the UK at the time there was 82,000 pubs in the UK Which you'd like, Might you're a beer guy? LAUGHTER That's right, up your alley. My whole personality. LAUGHTER Then they reached out to bookstores and asked if they would like to stock it.

Bookstores were suspicious of this strange little trivia book at first. Like, this kind of thing didn't exist at the time. In fact, one retailer, WH Smiths, predicted that it would be a disaster and only ordered six copies of the book for the entire United Kingdom. They sold all of them out within an hour or so. Later that morning, they up their order to 100 copies, then 1,000 by the afternoon, and then by the end of the week, 10,000 copies,

all by word of mouth from these drunks at the pub that raved about the book. The second run they sold 70,000 copies. They reprinted three more editions that year, and by December, they were at the top of the British bestsellers list with 187,000 copies sold, not including the 82,000 that were given away at the start of the year. The Guinness Book of Records was officially a publishing phenomenon. I can say it now. Yeah. Wow.

Yeah. And again, I just want to reiterate that's not like a statement on how good the work of the McWorders and Beaver were. It's more just like how shit culture was in 1955 that a trivia book blew up. The team settled into a rhythm of one edition of the book per year, released around October to coincide with Christmas shopping.

Over the years, many incredible records were made, including Alexey. This is where I'd like you to give us some amazing records. I've put together my favorite and most scary records from when I was a kid. One of them is for the smallest waste in the world for a living person. This is Kathy Young. She has held the Guinness World Record for most of our lifetime.

And I would do want to guess what object her waste is the same size as. Oh, I'm scared. I'm great. Oh. Oh. Too great. Okay. A two-letter bottle of solo.

Matt, you're actually quite close. It is a Jav May and A, it's just what she says, her way to the size of. And she is currently 87 years old and she still wears a corset every day because she can't do anything else about it. This is her lot in life now. She must wears a corset every day because she can't do anything else about it. This is her lot in life now. She must wear a corset every day. Right. So she corsets herself to the sides of a into the size of a jar of mayonnaise. So she has got a normal size chest area, an extremely tiny waist area that has been corsarseted down, and then she has a regular size underneath that

area as well. To claw out of the female pool. So ribcage and everything would be like, would have just slowly changed out was because of the coarseness. Yeah, that's what coarsets do. I don't think I understood that. Yeah. They're made to make you actually change permanently your shape. Well, if you wear them that often and that tight with that purpose, I'm sure that's what happens. Oh, yeah. If you just chuck it on to do a little burlesque

number here or there, probably we'll do too much. But you can find out more about her on her website, kaffeeyoung.com, but check it out soon because she uses Adobe Flashplay which goes out of business very soon. And then we've also got the Ramos Gomez family and they are known as the largest hairy family. And...

Yeah, I remember that. Yeah. These are a Mexican family that have the entirety of their family of 19 people that span five generations, all suffer rare conditions called congenital generalized hyper trickiosis, which means they are heavy everywhere, including the face and the torso, including the ladies. The women are described as being covered with a light to meet him coats of hair, while the men on the family have thick hair, approximately 98% of their body, apart from their hairs and feet.

Oh, fuck. Yuck. Just imagine that. That's what your knowners were, the hair, were the hair is family in the world. Well, I'm getting like, like they applied to beat have this. Yeah. That's right. They're not, it's not like they're telling him get us to fuck off. Yeah. I was like, no, people must know. Get us turned up on their doorstep with a certificate.

Yeah. Yeah. Your name is nominated. Yeah, yeah, your neighbor's nominated you Another one of my favorites who always terrified me is Kim Goodman And she has the record for farthest eyeball pop Stay often put her in the promo material right? She's everywhere you can find videos of her online, on Ripley's Believe It or Not Everywhere. Do you know this lady? You know her because her eyeballs pop quite far out of her head. I don't know if you've ever seen a normal photo of her,

but if you're imagining a lady with eyeballs dangling out of her head, that is her. She can pop them out 12 millimeters. Is this what, is this what Bavar wanted? Is this what, when he started his dream, is this very short, Gowick? Can you imagine someone going up to those twins, okay? Okay, who has the biggest eyeball pop, Kim Glubin.

She can pop out 12 in the middle, is that sort of a head. Then it take long for it to go for like fastest bird to sort of such a freaky? It seemed like it happened kind of in about a decade and a half. It sort of ramped up very quickly from sports and history and like agricultural facts to amazing bodies. To, yeah. It feels like facing bodies.

If they're smashing one out every year, like a lot of those records probably wouldn't change every 12 months. So that's got to keep expanding. We have finally records. Perious people. Perious people, yes. Yeah, the bird, there's no evolution. That bird is the fastest game bird until you kill every one of those birds. And you've tapped into something very apropos right now, which is that the book does begin to change

over the next little while, specifically over the next two decades. I'm gonna skip over most of the 60s, but to catch you up a little bit, it was a very groovy time, very shaggedellic. So Hugh Beaver passed away in 1967, tragically. Whoa. It's the same year that Dr. Evil got frozen.

Yeah, yes it was. He was survived by two daughters that he had with his wife, Jean, who was also his second cousin, Freaky, Freaky staff. Wow. This is, does same like appropriate time for the beaver to be around. Yeah. The beaver, he checked out, he checked out in 1967. He said, I've seen enough.

I'm alone. The beef, he checked out, he checked out in 67. He said, I've seen enough. I'm alive. The McWorders became like famous in a weird way. In the UK, they hosted a TV show called Record Breakers that started in 1972 and ran through to like 2001. They stopped being on it in the 80s, but they were like these two freaky twins who people would quiz on world records.

And they would, it sounds like the worst show of all time. People just asking them questions and they're answering. I'm actually going to show the show's so strange. So I've been watching a few this week that, it's like they don't, the contestants don't seem to know the cameras are rolling. It's just like, they're doing it like half asleep. It's so weird.

It's, you know, like they'll have like all these shiny things going on and then people weren't camera ready in the 70s and 80s. They didn't know, but now they're all stars. And then like I mentioned, one of them was assassinated by the IRA, but I don't really want to talk about it. I mean, you've brought up three times now. It's okay't really want to talk about it. I mean, you've brought up free time. I don't know if you do want to talk about it. It's okay if you want to talk about it. I refuse to talk about it. It's incredibly fascinating, but it is also incredibly sad. Anyway, because this one I said, they have like, you said political opinions. It's not because they were on this quiz show where people were annoyed at them or something. No, people weren't like, we need to stop these nautical twins. They're not too much.

No, they became political conservatives. Anyway, it doesn't matter. But was that an IRA type accent there, Cam? I just kind of tried to pick generic different accent to me. And then it's sort of, I don't know what it ended up as It sounds like captain babo so something We need to kill the McWarters You best start believing in fairy tales. You're in the Guinness World Records

Let's skip ahead a little bit Slick rain falls on a super gray English morning. The morning is English because we are still in English. But it's fine. I tend to call and form the underground. Just say one of those. Yeah. You can replace that with like the actual track when you go out of this.

Yeah. But more important than where are we is when are we? Where in September, in the year of our Lord, 1999, and the first run of the Guinness Book of Records, 2000 Millennium Edition has just hit the shelves. What's significant about this edition you ask? Well, I'll answer. This is the first of the books as we know them today.

A book made up mostly of pictures and illustrations with less printed records than in previous years, all bound with an eschemoring silver lenticular holographic embossed cover. Wow. Yeah. Right. That's the only kind of version I think I know. So I assumed they were always like that. They were previously very holographic in the 50s. That's an event hologram technology for these book covers. Wow. Yes. This is the beginning of a new era for Guinness, one that will focus less on fact finding and record keeping and more on flashiness, commercial appeal to families, and most of all, corporate synergy.

That becomes a huge part of this part of the report. During this decade of the next, Guinness will continue to sell roughly one million copies a year, which is nothing to sneeze at, but there has been a significant drop off during the 90s and the world of publishing is undeniably in a state of turmoil. Sorry to everyone who works in print media, but tragically, you are circling the drain right now. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed, fighting this for a row, positively in print media. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. We hope you're using your final words to be in praise of us. We hope that you re-skill and find a new medium. Even podcasting.

Yeah, podcasting is forever. I agree. Around the same time, rival record setting companies like Record Seder or popular YouTube channels like dude perfect pop up to take away a Significant bunch of eyeballs from the once-unique Guinness brand the only eyeballs that have stayed loyal to Guinness are the bulging eyeballs of Kim We've heard about earlier. I actually found out that she discovered her popping eyeball talent one day which was hit over the head and then her eyeballs popped out much further than usual and ever since then she could pop them out on her own free will. Further than usual. Further than usual, you know when you get hit upside the head and your eyeballs slightly pop out?

Her's didn't further than usual that time. pop out, Hurst did it further than usual that time. During the 2000s, Guinness makes a deliberate move to change the business model. A move that shifts away from celebrating the achievements of everyday human beings, like us, and towards highlighting the incredible feats of big companies like Yahoo, Intel, United Biscuits, Red Bull, Nissan, Richard Branson, DHL, Pepsi, Subway, and Sony. Finally, we didn't have to hear about the triumph of the human spirit, and we could watch multi-million dollar corporations get their moment in the sun for once. Thank you, Guinness. General Mills gets the record for the world's longest line of tacos. For example, United

Biscuits gets the record for the longest game of dominoes. Yahoo! Did the world's longest yodel. And Bill Gates got a world record. That's son of a bitch. Actually, his is pretty good is for the world's largest donation to AIDS research, which is weird. I mean, it's good that he did it, but it's weird to get a world record for that. Yeah. He definitely did it for the record. He asked, what's the current record? I'll beat that by $1. It was an obscene amount of money, but good on your bill, but you don't need to be in the book for that. The way the business shifted is like this now. So, a accompanying, say Red Bull, will hire Guinness to consult with them on conceiving a new world record that they can create and then break for publicity.

The team from Guinness will work together with Red Bull team and they'll come up with something like the Red Bull stratosphere jump or something where the extreme athlete attempting to become the first person to break the sound barrier in free fall. They'll train for that. They'll publicize it. Guinness will send an official adjudicator, probably like the one that we tried to contact and stalked online. And if you DM me about acting, I will give you her personal details. In fact, I saw a photo, anyway, it doesn't matter. In fact, I saw a photo, anyway, it doesn't matter. So she'll show up and so will the press. Red Bull will break the previously non-existent world record because they made it up and received lots of media attention

for their brand, all with the help of, and legitimacy of Guinness's prestige being attached to it. Guinness will do this for multiple companies every year. A service that Guinness has valued at $330,000 per record. So this is why you can't get hold of them. Yeah, we don't have $303,000. Your £5 isn't quite going to cut it. Yeah, so it seems like even that $1,000, that's chump change to Guinness. They're happy to take it because it means nothing to them. Guinness World Records has stopped being a worldwide publishing phenomenon and has effectively become an advertising firm seamlessly mingling content with marketing.

But that is not all. This is a little bit of info that I've actually pilfered from John Oliver the comedian and I guess he's kind of an investigative journalist like Alexi and I as well. Yeah, kind of. Yeah, it's funny, but we're exciting when we do stuff like this as well. Yeah, are you jealous of John Oliver? I actually am jealous of John Oliver's success. I wish I had it.

I wish I hosted a satire news program. I don't know how my side for sure. Yeah, I would tune in or I'd like, you know, I would get you to ride on the cam. All of us would be riding on my program about me taking the Mickey out of the news. Okay, so this is a little bit creep from John, although he reported it a couple of years ago on his show. It's not just big companies that are paying top dollar for Guinness experience, but also authoritarian governments like Turkmenistan, who is dictatorial leader, holds multiple world records, including worlds largest indoor Ferris wheel, highest density of buildings with white marble cladding, world's largest marble horse head statue, and the world's longest single line

bicycle parade. So they go over to Turkmenistan, they give all these world records to this like dictator basically. They've also were big fans, we're big fans of Turkmenistan. Oh yeah, sorry. We sorry. We did an episode about the previous one. This will be the current guy who got the job because he was the old guy's dentist. Wow. Yeah. It's a lot of past on his dentist by now. No, it's still the same dentist.

The dentist is still in charge. He was in the news last week. Oh, is it the same guy? He built a giant gold statue of a dog. Oh, yes. Yeah. Well, the good people at Guinness are there to thank for it. They've also worked with the oppressive regimes

of Saudi Arabia who have the world's largest flagpole and the world's largest cake and the Dubai police force who hold 11 world records, including most consecutive formations formed by an unmanned aerial vehicles, which is just a bunch of drones that they fly around into a bunch of shapes. It's all very scary. Cameron, and I also just watched the movie Hannibal on our movie podcast Total Reboot, and there's literally a scene in it where Clarice Darling gets the Guinness World Record for most kills by a female FBI agent.

Yeah. Yeah, I don't know if they actually give that world record out in real life, but it's in line. Someone turns up in the uniform and hands Clarice like the big frames to do that. She gets it in the mail. She opens it's like, God damn it, I just got the Guinness World Record. That is actually in the movie. What?

So that has a history of working with people like this. Oh, where do I get this? They're part of Big Hannibal. That's right. Okay, so what does all of this mean? Now look, Alexi and I are just humble comedians, but we are also critically claimed investigative journalist for the Australian Broadcasting Corporation. And we're not humble about that. We're not that humble. We're not that humble about the comedy, the rest of it, I'm very proud of.

Very proud. And it is our professional opinion that what all of this means is that Guinness is fucked allegedly. They began life as a drunken argument by a rich guy who is bad at shooting birds, they evolved from a book of pub trivia to a TV show to a worldwide publishing phenomenon in the 20th century that showcased real people achieving real world firsts. Since then, Guinness have devolved into a glorified advertising agency that specializes in lionizing

already ubiquitous and borderline evil brands like Coca-Cola and making custom-made propaganda for authoritarian dictators for undisclosed fees that must be in the millions. A lot has changed over the last 65 years to this day, but one thing has remained constant. The world record for the fastest ever game bird is held by the golden plover. Oh, he was right all along.

Was he or did he just make this whole thing to fucking stick it to his mates from beyond the grave? So that is the story of the Guinness World Records, a book that made the record for the most best-selling, copyrighted book, selling over 100 million copies in a hundred countries in over 37 languages a fact that I read in itself and They refused to speak to Alexi Knife for their podcasts so we fucking hate them. Thank you Thank you so much. What a great report. Oh, yeah, that was great

So do they still make the book at all? Was that printed annually anymore or not at all? They still make the book. You can check it out at your local demics or borders. To establishments that I don't think exist anymore. That's how all these things are bought a book. The new one comes out just in time for Christmas every single year the 2000 and 21 edition comes out right now and no we are not in as well as youngest podcaster We did not wait to come this year. We did not I just remembered the scariest record when I was growing up Alexi was I came into that they had a TV show in the the 90s and 2000s and They had an interview with a guy who was on there because he had

the world's most deadly flesh-eating bacteria. Oh my goodness. And it had both these legs and possibly an arm amputated. Oh. There was only way to stop this thing. And it eaten a ways like in like a fort-aird house, something. And the only thing you remember doing, because he was just an American and he just got it, was he banged his leg on a table at home on the dining table. And I was watching this as the seven year old,

thinking, well, I can never touch a dining table again. Oh my God. Did you rent the coffee table in front of the TV from now on? Oh, good Lord. Yeah, honestly, the scared me a lot. They just shouldn't put that on television, I don't think. Especially on a skit show.

So before calling an ambulance, he called Guinness. I got a spoon in it. See, freedom for an answer. Right now, Senator Judicated to me, I've got the scoop. Well, legs disappearing in front of my very eyes. He thought that his parents just didn't mean in time in the 1950s at a dance, but tragically, he was a flesh-sitting bacteria. That's horrifying stuff. That is so good. Now, before we normally do a whole Patreon shout-out

section after this, but we will not make you hang around for that. Before you head off. We'd love to hang out for the patreon goes about half an hour Yeah, cool Alexi will stick around for Oh Well, we weren't even gonna invite you cuz really We like you too much. Thank you. Thank you, but thank you to all the Patreon supporters from Cameron and I, the beloved creators of Finding Disparado. Yeah, which is a great podcast. Justin, I didn't drop in before we had Matt saying,

he only listened to the first episode but three times. Justin, I listen every week. Yes. And we love it. I'm saving the most current episode. Because I told both of you with Finding Drego that I was saving it for a road trip I was going on. So I listened to Finding Drago, like, a little too late, but

I was saving it. This one, I'm still saving for car trips, and I listened to the first three episodes driving to the beach with my partner, and now I can't listen to the next episode until we're both in the car together. Oh, no. I'm sorry. Because now I can't listen without him, or I'll get, no. I'm sorry. Because now I can't listen without him or I'll get I'll be that asshole. All right. Well, it looks like it's last man standing. I'm your biggest fan. I was in everything. Oh, wait. Yeah. I said, I just said it took, took me three guys who isn't the first one. I've listened to all models. Yeah. Just over took a couple of false start. That's all. Yeah. I think unfortunately Matt is still number one fan because he gave us those

two extra plays on the first episode. And that means a lot to the ABC. They said get a couple of friends to listen to the few extra times. About them. I'll be. Yeah, it gets it up the chart. We, and I've got to say we love great names on this on podcasts. We come across people from history with great names, for example, Hugh Beaver Beaver absolutely goes down in there but why don't you say every week on your show and I love their work the music on your show is fantastic but I get excited everywhere I've never met this person but you say music by Luca Baroni Peters and that name gets stuck in my head. It's a great name. He's a great guy He's one of my best friends from film school.

And he has made music for me very often. It's so, the music is so good. Love it. Awesome. It's a beautiful sounding show. Yeah, production on it's awesome, guys. But it's not, it's not your only hit podcast show. You've also got Total Reboot, which is a weekly show

where you go through the reboots and the remakes and repart. We did the original Disney Aladdin movie with you. Oh that's right yeah we did a crossover event. That's where in primates and put a reboot. We're talking about the gorgeous monkey aboo. Oh beautiful. He's a handsome little fella. What a handsome and cheeky monkey. Yeah, very cheeky. That's the big. One of the most cheeky monkeys. But yeah, that's our pop-up.

As show we've talked about on this probably not for a while we just talk about a fair bit. We all love mic check. Is that still hanging around in the background? We keep saying we're gonna do, because Mike Myers, but he kinda doesn't know if this is, we had a podcast all about the films of Mike Myers and we went through all of his films and then some.

But he came back last year, he was in two movies. One of them was Bohemian Rhapsody, which we wanted to never see because we don't like the director. We think he's not a good guy. He's not a good guy. We'll go on the record allegedly quite a piece of shit.

Oh no. Is it Brian Singer? Is that his name? Yeah, it's Brian Singer, right. One of the worst guys you can... You've just ruined old X-Files. No, X-man movies. Yeah, I know tragically you can't go back. But the ex files are still like ex files are still better

than ever actually. We love the ex files movies. We love the one with Billy Conley. That one is so good. But yeah, so I've watched Bo rap because Alexi said I had to watch it because we were gonna review it the following week And then Alexi just never watched it. So we've never we've never reviewed it and now I've just seen this fucking movie Cameron's gonna lock then ready to go once I pull the trigger and watch a bow wrap There will be a whole new mic check episode out, but I really don't want to watch it so it might be some time episode out, but I really don't want to watch it, so it might be some time. And it was the podcast, of course, that inspired primates. I sent Alexia a very earnest message asking for permission. I kissed the ring.

Yeah, I still remember the email. We were just like, hey, I want to do a podcast where I talk about monkeys in movies. Is it too similar to Mike Jack? I'm like, what the fuck is talking about? I'm like, maybe Mike Mice is a phrase of freaking monkey dude? Maybe two or 10 is, but not Mike Mice.

Oh my God, I don't even know if Mike Mice has even been in one movie with one monkey. He has been in a sketch with a monkey, date. Yes, of course, date of course, the host of Sprockets, He loves to see touch my monkey, touch it. Yeah, that's a little bit monkey. Oh, well, maybe there's a future primates episode there, but I, yeah, no, I think it was because I just directly was inspired by your show that I thought, I can't, I am, I in my head,

on you, I was ripping you off, even if it's not that clear from the outside. So I felt guilty about it. I felt guilty even having the idea. I needed to get your permission. Well, we absorb your, your guilt. You may begin that podcast that you've And we wish you all the best on your podcasting journey. Thank you so much. Thanks so much for joining us. It has been an absolute pleasure. Thanks for having us.

So we love this show. I listen to this show when I'm driving the car. So I'm much like Jess Perkins. Yes, I've always said that. Yes, but I never drive to the beach. Only because it's just a story throw away. We walk to Bondi Beach every single day and we absolutely love it folks. We surf with all the other Aussies and we love it here.

Can't wait to check out Millbourne next time. I was even thinking of going up to Brisbane. All right, we're going insane. Thank you. Thank you so much, guys. You can check out all your podcasts, including Fighting Desprato and all the podcast apps. And I believe you've convinced everything to let you go on Spotify. So I can graduate. Yes. We're one of the first ABC podcasts to be allowed on Spotify.

Fighting Desprato is on Spotify and Apple Podcast and Google Podcast and Pod Spotify, and Apple Podcast, and Google Podcast, and Podbean, I believe. I don't know what that is, but someone has said Podbean to me, and I thought it sounded very funny. Yeah, what you're doing, podcatching you use. And whether it be podbean, or one of the more mainstream podgages,

you can list it there. Every six months, I say, we get an email from Podbean saying, someone has commented on your podcast. Oh, yeah. About 20 years, it's a real thrill. Thanks, Podbean. It's really.

Thanks so much for having us guys. Really appreciate it. Thank you so much. Well, now it's time for everyone's favorite section of the show. And I knew that was coming. It wasn't just because Dave pointed at me dramatically. It's the fact quote a question section, which has a jingle,

I think, because it's a little something like this. Facked quote a question. Ding. Anyways, remember the ding. And the way to get involved in this is to go to patron.com slash do go on pod and you can support us on the Sydney Shamburg Dox Memorial edition level rest in peace.

The great man. And if you're on this level, you get all the delicious goodies from the levels below, including... Um. ...Bray bonus episodes per month. Yum, yum, yum. Yum, yum, yum. You get a newsletter every week written by Jess and with bits written by me and Dave.

No, we'll lap it up. You get Facebook group access. and with bits written by me and Dave. No, we'll wrap it up. You get Facebook group access. You get voting rights. You get other things. Once a year we'll send out a Christmas card. Those already been sent, but get in for next year. Yeah, you've got to get in now for next year.

Thankfully, Christmas, it keeps coming. Thank God it does. I love Christmas. No, you do it keeps coming. Thank God it does. I love Christmas. No, you do. You love it. Love it so much. But let's get into the facts, the quotes, and the questions. This is what you get if you are on the Sydney-Shan Berg level.

You get to give us a fact to quote a question. You also get to give yourself a title. Firstly, this week, we have Siraj, who has given himself the title of Chief Sorter, do you go on hate mail and complaints department? That's, that's handy. I mean, I don't think your job's too busy. Hopefully Sriraj is it?

Well, have you been diverting or from now? He's that good. We've been seeing that many. Thanks so much. You only pass us on the top shelf hate. You know what Sriraj does pass on though? Or he did at a recent live stream. He sent in, I don't know if you realize this,

because I ate most of them, two boxes of donuts. Mm-hmm. Oh yeah, I enjoyed those things. You said my Sriraj. One of them I cut, I took home and cut open later, and I didn't know what was gonna be inside. And it was like a cheesecake. What?

Billing. Cheesecake inside of a cheesecake. What? Billing. Cheesecake inside a doughnut. Yeah. That's crazy. It was. Crazy good. Yeah. So Sirarch has offered us a fact this week

and his fact is, you've made 2020 enjoyable or at least bearable. Thank you so much, Sirarch. That's a great fact. Oh, I thought I was gonna lead to something like that. No, no, you're right. Thank you so much, Saraje. That's a great fact. I thought I was going to lead this on with that. No, you're right. He does continue on. I don't read this until I read him.

So I didn't realize. Now that I scroll down, I say it does go on. Okay, thanks, Saraje. I thought that was his fact. Me too. I was like, we're on a great fact. Just wanted to say thanks to all of you for always being a bright spot in the week

or day for those of us catching up on back catalogs. And helping us get through this monstrosity, even more so than Matt Skons of a year. Thanks. Oh, hang on. Got another little side swipe of my Skons. Second time a problem. I know that's right.

I'm just episode. I wasn't gonna touch it. Because when he talks Skons, I'm like, uh. Here we go. I'm not, I know he probably doesn't belong, but I'm not going to. If you were to me, people are doing it wrong. If them are jarring, you're doing it wrong. Are they doing it wrong? Wow. Most people do do it wrong. Oh, you're going to, oh, sorry, Dave, you're telling me what the number one

song this week is the best song. Yes. The popular. Vatute. Hack mentality. All about it. What do you guys think? Yeah. That's me. Hack mentality. I'm all about it. Thank you. What do you guys think? Yeah. That's me. I disagree. No, no. Oh, yeah, you would, you can try and prick.

Yeah, you could, you could try and prick. I mean, I genuinely do like, with cream on first, and then the little dollop of jam. I feel like it changes up the texture, but I don't mind switching around every time. It does make it taste a little bit different somewhere. I don't understand how. Maybe because it's not soggy from the cream soaking in.

No, it's not. What kind of creamy, are you using, what kind of creamy? Are you using milk? Are you seeing a creamy from Vermont? Yeah, I'm just putting milk on it. It gets all soggy. No, cream shouldn't make it soggy. Well, well. Bikiniol cream. Should make it soggy. Well.

Bicken your cream. Should be thicker than plaster. It should be solid. It should be solid. Yeah, ideally it'd be quite solid. Blender plain on it. So I used to say when I worked as a barista, skinny milk really froths better than full cream milk.

So if you're making a baby chino, for example, you're gonna use some skinny milk there. And what you do is then you froth it, bang it on the table, let it sit for a second, and you go learn to play it on that and everyone around you laughs. That's great. How many times you use that?

It's four times a day. I didn't know that you worked as a brister. There you go. So you know you weren't no way around a coffee machine really well then, because for me, as a non-coffee drinker and non-coffee maker, I'll look at that thing in awe. Yeah, that looks really hard.

Yeah, I mean, I mean, it was a long time ago and for a short period of time. So I don't think I'm not, I can't do like cool latte art. You know what I mean? But I can make it coffee. Yeah, the most important part is that it looks good. Hey, you drink with your eyes. I'm gonna do the way I'll do it.

I don't know a lot about coffee art, but I know what I like. Delicious coffee. Pouring it in my eyes. Oh god, it hurts so good. Come on baby. Thank you so much, Suraj. That was very nice. What a nice fact. He's a love Saraj. I was so nice. I was blushing You still are it's embarrassing. Is it too much to say that I'm I'm in love with

Oh, yeah, that's too much. Okay. Well, I won't say it Double check just double checking first this align and you would have crossed it, but you didn't oh, thank god It was a very close call glad I clarified The next one comes from Sophie Chuta. Well, Chuta, she has corrected me on this. I always said Chuta and it's not that. So I'm going to say again, Sophie Chuta. Great.

No. I thought it was Chuta. Maybe I'm... Well, Sophie, I'm so sorry. You've done both there. You covered. We covered all of this. Yes, Chuta.

Pick which one's right. I reckon it's Chuta. Sorry. Sorry. You covered it. Okay, right. We covered all the way. Yes, Cheetah. Pick which runs right. Orange is Cheetah. Yeah, sorry, sorry. I threw it through a spanner and they really did. Sophie has given herself the title of Lady of the Principality of Zealand. Melody. This is genuine. Thanks to a birthday present from my husband. Yes. Hey David, her husband has come through with the goods. Yeah, look, Australia Post just doesn't know what they're doing anymore.

For those that don't know, after we did an episode about C-Land and Dave won too much money for locking Puyers, he promised that he was going to buy Jess and I titles from C-Land. Yeah. And he has not come through with the goods. Both of our birthdays have been in Goon. And when he for the right special occasion. Well, Christmas is coming. Yeah, Christmas coming up. Oh, yeah. So that would be great. I'd be awesome. I'd love that for Christmas.

I'd love that too. The thing that you promised this. I'll get you a Guinness book of world records. I don't I love a Christmas present too. I get you one every year. Yeah, he does. You do. And we forget, we forget every year. But Dave always remembers and then we go, fuck, he started again. Yeah, I kind of feel of feel so and he always goes oh no, you know, I just saw that us But he like you know he went shopping specifically for us. I'm gonna get you something this year No, I'm gonna I'll get you the titles It just looks more all right Dave. I'll get you something as well, but Matt. Let's not get it. Tell there anything I love that

This is from I love that I'm happy to do it either way. I love it either way. But if you don't want to, I'm not going to force the present on you just to embarrass you. Oh, you actually met? You weren't going to get me. Sofi writes another fact here. If you eat about five large carrots every day for a couple of months, your skin can start to turn orange. I think this is a science experiment that Matt could and should try out. I agree. I want to do that too.

I love carrots. And I would love to get a bit of color in my pale, pale complexion. Orange is the color. Yeah, it matches the beard all the way up. Five a day is a lot though, isn't it? Is that a lot freaky, you think? Yeah, I could, yeah, I would probably way up. Five a day is a lot though, isn't it? Is that a lot fricking you think? Yeah, I could, yeah, I would probably eat

about a carrot a day now. So it would be taken up, well, five-fold. Five-fold. Five-fold, ish. Oh, yeah, I mean, I have to check the maths there, but I think it's better. I don't think it's every day, but there definitely be days where I might have three carrots.

How are you eating them? It sticks. Yeah, I'll have carrots and some hummus as a little snack. That's a good point. And then there might be a carrot in my dinner. You know? Okay.

So I could get you to three. Someone brought a carrot in my dinner. Wait a minute, there's a carrot in my dinner. There's a carrot. Thank you so much Sophie, great fact. And yeah, if there's a carrot producer, everyone's to sponsor me. I will eat five of your product a day.

Absolutely. I don't know how long I have to do it for. Two months. And does it go away again? Cause I don't want to, I don't want to be permanent. Yeah, I got one. I'm sure that reset, yeah. Thank you so much, Sophie.

This next one comes from Rob Demand. He's put in brackets, Damien or Damien, if you're feeling silly, well, I am. I am Rob, and Rob's given himself the title of director of getting down and being proud. All right. Okay. Live your best life.

Rob writes, oh, this is a fact, quick, Jess, called David Dickhead, pause, huh? Rob writes, and this is a fact, quick Jess, called David Dickhead, pause, huh, I bet Dave did not see that coming. Wait, quick Jess. Will you give me a chance, say it again? Quick Jess, called David Dickhead. Dave, you're a dickhead.

What? I bet he did not see that coming. I fucked it up, not, it actually says Paul's and I didn't. You read Paul's, though. Yeah. That's because when I listen to music with the Paul's and I say Paul's, you love saying Paul's. One of my favorite things to hear in the distance is Matt go, Paul's.

The in excess episode of Listen Now Sam and I both did it at the same point. I'm like, oh, maybe it's a family thing. That's beautiful. It's a beautiful in excess pause. And we both went, pause. That's a beautiful moment. Beautiful moment. Rob continues.

Oh, he continues. Sorry, I did not see that coming. I don't know if you're get it, but he writes, I live in mid-Minnesota, Minnesota, big fan of the show, found you guys through the weekly planet pod. Hey, shout out to those guys. Love Mesa and James.

I was listening to an old bookcheat this week. I had James on it, and I'm like, how good is that guy at podcasting? He's so good. As is is Claire who is also on oh We're talking Sherlock Holmes or Talking about Sherlock Holmes. Yes Because I've just listened to the audio book of Stephen Fryte on that story and I'm getting you to recap it I thought right cuz you would bring talking about it and I said oh I've done that on the show. Yeah the

Something in Scarlett that is in Scarlett and then I the something in Scarlett. Daddy's in Scarlett. And then I, um, because I had been, and I still am, was in the show like, as I'm going to sleep each night, and that night I'm like, oh, listen to Dave, and I was, I'd listened to half the episode, I'm like, I'm less, I'm further away from sleep than when I began.

This is too motherfucking stimulating. I'd had to turn it off and put some boring old Stephen Fry back on. That's the power of Mr. Sunday movies. Yeah. Clear to Auntie. Anyway, I digress. Rob continues.

I work in construction and I mean, a very loud environment all day and I've been binging your pod for the last couple of months. So thanks. Keep up the good work, Dave. Keep laughing, Jess, and keep showing up, Matt. Oh, no, I was the punchline. Oh, no.

Did you not see that? I did not see that coming. What was in construction? Is that not what Tony Suprano used to say? Just saying. Oh, hello. Wow. Wow.

Wow is what I will say. Wow, is a lot I will say. Wow. He says update on your column. I mean, we haven't got to affect yet, I don't think. I mean, there's probably plenty of facts in here. It's a fact that he got to us through the weekly planet, et cetera, but. Great fact.

Update on your column murder episode, Brian Wells, was not in on the robbery. There was a dock on Netflix now. It's pretty heartbreaking. Yes, right. That Netflix a docker on Netflix now. It's pretty heartbreaking. Yes, right. That Netflix, it was, I never watched it. Did you guys watch it? Yeah, I watched it. The collar bum highest was the episode. Was that me until I did that report? No, I did.

You did the report. Was it not, I know, the documentary came out after. Yeah. Not long after, yeah, right. And that's why on our YouTube episode version of that episode, we got a few views and a lot of people not enjoying us, not taking it seriously enough. Yes, but I have been reliably informed that they do not mention the cheese or butter rooms. Yeah.

In the Netflix show. And I just think that's poor journalism. That is poor journalism. What the fuck is the point? If you're gonna tell a story, tell all of the story. Exactly right. Why are you leaving out important facts? Come on, she's got a butter and a cheese around.

Very disappointing. Rob finally says, in Arizona, it's a league, oh, I get this is the fact. Oh, Rob. In Arizona, it's a legal for a donkey to sleep in a bathtub. In the 1920s, a local dam broke, flooding a ranch as home. The ranchers' donkey had become accustomed to sleeping in a bathtub, which filled with water and whisked him miles away. After working to rescue the animal, the town

passed a law that prohibits donkeys from sleeping in the tub. Wow, but if he likes doing it, it cares where he sleeps. He's accustomed to it. That's right. And so imagine that the town just not going up to the Donkeys owner and say, hey, can you stop doing that? Is it some reason it affects us?

They say, no, we're taking this to the town meeting. We're gonna ratify it with town council. We're putting pen to paper. Wow, that's a wild fact. I love, I don't know if you know this about me, but I love getting in that bar tub. I'm a bit of an ass, if you know what I mean. And finally, we've got Vincienzo, Vinny Giovanni Bonadonna.

I know a dog called Vincienzo. Oh, fantastic. Not this guy though. Vincienzo is no dog. No dog at all. And Vinny asks a question. He's got a preamble. Since it's almost thank-giving when I'm writing this, has it passed? It's passed now. What a time this comes out, yes. When I'm writing this, I would like to say I'm thankful to things that exist in my life. One, voice acting such work. Two, watch Mojo top 10 videos. Following on from that, I don't understand what that means.

Does that make sense? Do you guys, or are they just genuine things he's thankful for? Yeah, I think it's just me, like a countdown series on YouTube that I think that they're a fan of. Gotcha. Oh, actually, maybe he does the voice work for Mojo Top 10 videos. Is that... Oh.

Sorry, in Chenzoe, it's getting late here, and I'm already slow to begin with. In Chenzoe, continue, starting with number two. I don't really care for watch Mojo videos anymore. Okay, maybe I was wrong with it. But I found Mr. Sunday movies through them and that brought me to Planet Broadcasting and a plethora of great podcasts.

And at number one, at a young age, I enjoyed radio talk shows and things like that as well. I enjoyed different accents. I found that the Australian accent is most pleasing to my ears in the podcast slash radio form. I feel like I've butchered every inch of that. Do you, you're following what I'm saying? I'm now, I'm looking at WatchMojo is a YouTube channel that they're top 10 lists on music TV film and video games. We publish four or more top 10s daily and they have 23 million subscribers so they are very, very popular.

But obviously he's not that big fan of them anymore. But it did deliver him here. Anyway, Vincienzo, Vinnie's question is, what accents do you guys like or enjoy? Or whose voice is in particular? I wish in Scottish, very nice. Oh, absolutely. I love a beautiful Spanish voice. Yeah, I love the New Zealand accent.

Yeah, New Zealand's really nice. I love staying with the Spanish specific people. I love Rafael Nadal and the new press conference up for a tennis match. That's a good one. South African one, I'm a fan of. It's also, it can be very funny, but it's also just like, I think it's a nice accent.

I need Donna, use it pretty well in their, in their sketch, Netflix series. I don't think there are any, I can't think of an accent I don't like. I like accents. Yeah. Because you always find other accents interesting. I don't really think about Australians much. I love it. England's got so many and you know, sort of small amount of space. Yeah, that's amazing how different they are. I also love many of the accents from the Caribbean. Oh yeah, beautiful.

Oh, like the Caribbean? Yeah, from the Caribbean, sorry, so correctly. Yeah, I think both acceptable. But I, and it's the same in America, they've got so many accents as well. And in Canada, right? I mean, Canada is in America, if you think about it. Second. So, thank you, Vincienza Rob. Sophie and Saraj for those faxas, quotes, and those questions. You can get involved

with that. Like I say, Petron or Comsache to go on pod. We also like to thank a few of our other supporters and just normally comes up with a little game before we do that relating to the topic. We give them a record. Oh, that makes sense. What do you reckon? Oh, great.

Made for it. Well, if I could kick things off, I would love to think from Ermsworth in England. I imagine they have fantastic accents. I'd love to think Adam Osborne and Daniel Reed, double power, bit of a power couple. Oh, what can they do together? Um, about worlds longest tandem bike ride. Oh, that's nice. How long they ride for? Like all the way around the world. Good, fast. They've only got onto a ferry.

They're peddling the whole time. They rode up into like a something that caught the wheel and then it's to the peddling. That sounds awful. Oh, well, how do I get that? That'll be brutal when you know you. It's not actually helping you move. Or is it powering the ferry?

Yes. Oh, okay, now I'm in. It's also powering your own sense of self-satisfaction. No. Wow. So no breaks. Oh no, it's one of those records where it's like, they went around the world, but it took them 11 months.

Right. Oh, that's down. That could be nice. Yeah, so they've seen every contest. So they do stop to sleep and eat. Yes, but they sleep and eat on the bike. Oh, no, that's not true. Yeah, okay, great.

Thank you so much, Adam and Danny L. You could walk on the bike. Oh, no, that's not true. Yeah, okay, great. Thank you so much, Adam and Danielle. Good luck on the ride. I would also love to thank from Agora Hills in California, yeah, in the United States. John McName, John McName. John has the record, like I've started this sentence with no idea where I'm going. With the most eyebrows. Most eyebrows. Multiple eyebrows. Yes.

Whoa. So there's like, you think you've got eyebrows, you've got two. I've got two. I would have thought I'm club escalator so far. No, John has three sets of eyebrows above those. Oh, so like. So eight and a half. Added us. No, added us stripes plus one. Yeah. Oh, so like, add it as, no, add it as stripes, plus one.

Yeah, the kid going up. So if he shocked, you're like, holy shit, he's shocked. Oh, he's shit, that guy is shocked. Let me tell you. Whoa. That's, yeah, that's a great record. And how, and did he have to shave them in? Like, you did he have just a, a pat of hairy-

No, it's natural, but he only discovered it when he was hit over the head. Oh, wow. Okay, I love that. Thanks so much, John McNamy. What a fantastic record you hold. And I would finally love to thank from Sutherland in New South Wales, Australia,

Benjamin Luke Waters. Luke Waters, you'd think he'd have a nickname, warm, right? Luke Waters. Yeah, absolutely. Warmy. Do you think you've been known as warmy? Yeah.

That's the record for most consistent temperature created by his mouth. Right. He's like blowing... Blue-warmer. Blue is blowing bubbles in a water and it keeps it... Is that the Miller temperature? Whoa. Miller degree.

Miller degree. Whoa. Miller degree. Miller degree. Yeah. Miller time. Wow. Yeah, he keeps it right on the same temperate. What temperature is it? Beautiful temperature of all. 69 degrees.

69.6. Yeah. May. Yeah. It's enough at two for two. There's not. Oh. Celcius.

Probably Fahrenheit. Celci not Celsius that's very That's a quite warm. It's really a dragon. That is too hard for a spa. Yeah, it's too hard for a spa. Oh yeah, I reckon I'm not quite hot enough to boil the kettle. No, okay. You really are barista. Yeah, I know. I don't want to get shit boils that. It feels like we're running out of puff. It's quite late at night. Come on, all right, let's keep this going. I would like to thank now. So thanks, those legends.

I would like to thank from Kitchener in Ontario, Canada, Justin Goddally. Oh, okay. World record for longest vertical swim up a waterfall. Wow! Amazing, like a salmon going up. Yeah, he's like a salmon. Wow. The human salmon is what he's marketed as. Amazing. Just and got to leave the human salmon. That's incredible. All the way up.

The salmon, yeah. And he swam all the way up. The highest one. So fun is only the third highest waterfall in the world. He's still attempting to top the first and second falls waterfalls. Which are K1 and K2. The only thing that number one is the angel falls and then it is weller.

Yeah. Number two. I'm curious nerds. I'm one'm curious. I call that K1. I cure a big old nerd. Who knows about that? I don't know. What are you one of the bloody McQuirter twins? Yeah, go ahead. Dave McSquirt are over here. McSquirt and facts that is. He's tiny Tush. Yeah, I squirt out my Tush. Thank you to Ryan Godly, so Justin Dudley.

I would like to thank now from Watford in England, Damon Reichroft. Damon obviously has the world record for the most convincing impression of Dwayne the Rock Johnson. Oh, that's so good. I was good, anyway. I was thinking, honestly. No, can you save it?

Or can you, okay, no. It was going to be world's best impression of Shane Warren. Can he do both? Oh, yes, absolutely, yes. He's very good. Got two records, actually. If you smell what Damon Reichroft is spinning. Chain wand. Yes, Spin Bola.

Spin King with a shake of twig. Great nickname. That is a good name. That is a good name. Great nickname. Minds the scientist. Thank you so much to Damon Reichroft. I would like to find out. That is a good nickname to the scientist.

No, scientist. I'd like to think from San Diego in California, Todd Gladden. Oh, that's a great name. It holds the record for the world's longest umbilical cord. Oh, he is? Yeah, yeah, he. Or Iron Rolf. Oh, no, he, it's his and he has not cut it off.

Really? So I still, he's sort of on the leash. So speak from the neck. Turn up, fall off eventually. No. I think they're meant to. I mean, but this is the longest one ever. He's like a glute.

He's like, it's 48 meters long. If I'm picturing this right, if he followed that back to its source, it would be up his mum. And less it's been detached from his mum. And he's just walk around with a Russian umbilical cord. 40 I met a long umbilical cord. Yeah Dave, this was a great one.

But when you said, still attached, you meant to him. I thought, yeah, I thought both. So he could go bungee jumping on that if you meant to him. I thought... No, yeah, I thought both. No, it's... So he could go bungee jumping on that if you wanted to. It's up to you, mom. Mommy and her time. Mom grabbed that little shrub. Mom, if you got a good grip on it, grab the shrub.

Oh. Just look on your faces. You're going, if he followed that, yeah, there'd be a piece of mum. On your card. Thanks, Todd. Is it my turn? Oh yeah.

Hooray. I would love to thank from Edinburgh in Scotland. I'd love to thank Clara O'Shea. That's an Irish name. I'm a big fan of it now. That's an incredible name. That's an incredible name. Oh, it's an Irish name.

I'm saying chickens and eggs. Yep. They love these. They love egg-related records. They're often smashed in with their heads, but not in this case. This is the world record for the amount of eggs matched to the mother hen.

Wow. She gets, she gets emolgy as well. This is that hen's, and she returns them all to. How many hens? It was actually 33,462 million. Wow. So, hen, so many eggs. Well, to a pace, you do the sums.

I can't, I've forgotten the first number. 66 billion or something like that. Yeah, it's got a few. Wow. Wow. You match back like an entire year supply of eggs. Yeah, it was, yeah. It was a big undertaking.

What percentage of accuracy? Oh, within, within zero point four, one percent. Yeah. Oh, wow. That is incredible. Why is she not a household name? I don't know. I have no idea. And the question you ask makes me furious.

Why isn't she a household name? It's wild. She should be. It's bullshit. It's absolute bullshit. I scream and I'm from the rooftops. I don't know. I've heard. Clara Shade, matching them eggs and people got shush. Yeah, it's a middle of an all.

Like a huge shush. Yeah. If you start sitting around the dinner table saying, I'm Clara Shay, this Clara Shay, that, then I will shush. Yep. But until that day, I will be yelling away. Mm-hmm. Doing Gold's work.

I appreciate that. And so it-hmm. Doing God's work. I appreciate that. And so does Clara. Thank you, Clara. I would also love to thank for a mashem in great bread. What about that? Yeah, like that too. I just thank Stephen Hiddley.

Mashem, Stephen from Mashem. What about our world's wobbliest wheelbarrow? Oh, wow. Must be really wobbly. What a stephen down here. Stephen? Stephen under being clued. Oh wow, must be really wobbly. Now what is Stefan Don, he... Stefan... Stefan, what is Stefan under being cluded with? He loses the wheelbarrow.

And he's lived to cope with it. Oh yeah, he knows how that is. He doesn't spill a thing. He's done over his entire garden using the wobbliest wheelbarrow. That is good. Wow. Now he's really impressive.

Fuck you. No. Now he's really impressive. Fuck you. That's why you are the Panmaster. No, but a master passed down to a king. What, what, please, Wilbur? I mean, come on. That's very good. And he's done a really good job. He's done a great job. Don't take that away from him. No, no, no, no, no, come on.

What do you think? He's losing some wheels. I didn't realize words for at least scale. In the book, there's a photo of him next to the wheelbarrow at least. Yeah. Kind of have a wheelbarrow. He's blurry because he's trying to hold on. And they just, whoa, whoa, whoa, amazing. Most people would fall over, but he, amazing balance. Anybody else get pushed around at a wheelbarrow? A lot of us are kids. Oh, I love that. Oh, so fun. So wobbly. Yeah. So wobbly.

It's a bit dangerous. But the wobbly is possible. Oh, my goodness. Gracious day. That's the Paul Man's Unicycle. Yeah, me too. Probably there. Yeah.

Maybe it's the other way around, actually. Well, yeah, if you can't afford a bike with two wheels. I think of wheelbarrows, really, the rich man's unicycle, because it's actually useful. Yeah, you can put stuff in it. The trailer, that was on I remember that getting the trial before a holiday, push it from the back to the front, you'd have to sit on the back to counterweight. So what a thrill. That 20 meter rock. Oh, man, I felt like, you know, the world was full of possibilities for that five to ten

seconds. Anything's possible. What free! Like Dad, take your time. Do a loop. Oh my God, Dad, please do a loop. Thank you for giving us that opportunity to go down memory lane, Stefan, with your wobbly wheelbarrow.

Wobbly, the wobbly wheelbarrow. Wobbly wheelbarrow. Wobbly, world, the wobbly wheelbarrow. This is a really fun to say. And finally, from a little close at home, in Marambina here in Victoria, I'd love to thank David Seris. Might be series, Seris, probably. Marambina, where his and play their first ever concert,

is that where Duncan McKenna reserve his? I think it is. Dave, you know, all sorts of bullshit. Look at the area. I think yeah, yeah, Duncan McKinnon, really. Yeah. That's funny. What about, um, record holder for, um, world's most value got at an all you can eat buffet. Oh, so he did a skip the bread rolls. Yeah, oh, no, he went for only value density. So he went straight, he went in for the lobster. Yes,

food stains. Stake a very expensive. Raffles soup. French and Indian soup. Yeah, very expensive soup. A bottle of champagne. It's a very fancy. Yeah, got the gold ring, lobobob, lobobob, gold ring lobobob, did not fill up on bread. No, absolutely no bread, no pizza, no very little carbs at all. No bottomless soft drink. Basically none of the good stuff. Yeah, all the delicious stuff. Garlic bread within within three plates, they've gotten like $700 worth of food. Oh, yeah, that's good. Pretty good stuff. Very impressive, yeah.

Well done. Where is this buffet with lobsters and... Pizza Hut. Pizza Hut, Marambina. Oh, wow. Let me be now. That's a hidden gem. Yeah.

I don't know. Nothing Melbourne has still had a din in pizza, but Marambina. Marambina. I mean, if everyone knew about that, they'd be out of business. Right. They are giving away gold-plated lobsters in their, all you can eat, but it is really bad with you. And their business idea is not to tell people about it, so they don't lose too much money. That's smart business. That's not important.

It's a word of mouth, kind of. Exactly. If you know, you know. Exactly. It's like a speak easy. If you know, you know. Exactly. It's like a speakeasy. You gotta know the code. You gotta know the code word is I know Ducky. Ducky, what a guy.

A guy from the Australian Pizza Hut ads in the 90s and early 2000s. Remember one time he asked for a tip and they guy said, he said, work hard, be good to your mother. And that was a big hit ad, big hit ad. I'm like, ah, that's not what he meant, mate. He meant money. He went to cash, cash money. Can I have extra money, please?

All right, well that brings us to the last bit of business we do, thanking our brilliant Patreon supporters. If it wasn't for our supporters, this show would not exist, so we can't thank you enough. These next people being inducted into the Trippage Club, I'm standing at the door, you got the Velvet Row, but we're ready to lift. I've got the clipboard in my hand.

I'm going to read out four names this week. After I read them out, Dave will hype them up. So they're coming into the club feeling good about themselves. Dave's not always that confident in the way he hype some up. So Jess then hypes up Dave. Thank you. Dave's also booked a band. Jess got some or Derves or food of some sort and a drink.

What do we got on the menu tonight? A Guinness. Oh yeah. Great one. I get it. I get it. Ballmas. Oh.

And soda bread. Ah. Then Irish theme. I love it. Oh, French soda bread. I don't know what it is, but it sounds like bread. When we were in Ireland, we stayed at that very nice Airbnb in Dublin, and they had made some bread for us.

That was bread. That was a nice bread. Bread was great. I forgot about that bread. You like soda bread. I hate most of it. Did I say that to you then as well? I'm like, what soda bread? Yes. Yeah, sorry. No. My memory.

But I just knew that you'd had it and liked it. And so I was like, I can remind you of this exactly. I remember it. Yeah, I loved that little, whatever we had there, four nights in Ireland and Dublin, loved it so much. Beautiful. And I did say, I don't like Guinness earlier, I get it, but shit, I don't mind it.

I just prefer nearly every other stout. That's all. I like it enough. Yeah, that's fair enough. It's just not, it's different to every other stout. Yeah, it's very unique. Yeah. And I don't mind, I just couldn't, you know.

I mean, you're not gonna be smashing back eight points of it, are you? No, I had a point of it the night we did the Irish live show. Yeah. And it was great. People always said the Guinness have in Dublin taste fresher, and that didn't turn out to be the case. That was interesting. A taste of the exact same to the ones I've had in Melbourne and elsewhere.

But anyone who was offended earlier, though, when you said you didn't really like it, it's not still listening out of here that apology that backpedaling. Oh, well, when I get angry message, I'll say, well, listen to the end of it. Yeah, actually, I completely backpedaled. So Dave, who is performing? Well, I think we're the Irish themed. No, we've got you two.

I knew you two. But instrumental. Oh, no, I'm not sure. I cannot be making it, but you know who will be there? Cream! So he will be playing the character of Cream whilst the band play and look at him with bemused looks. Going, what are we fucking doing up here?

That might have been one of the hardest laughs I've ever had in my life just because we were so tired. We were so tired. And thankfully- We were going back to the live island episode, the one about, I don't remember what it was called, but it was about the- Dublin Whiskey flood and other Irish tales.

And there was a rift that we did in the Patreon section about characters that Bonona had played. Yeah. And but if you want to just find it out, out on about Baron Irish listeners, John has actually Dugo-onamated that. Has he done that one? Yeah, there is an animation about the movie that's been

We shouldn't say it on the pod because we haven't. We mentioned that we're nominated for an actor, or actually, by the time this comes out, we've probably already lost an actor, it to be nominated and yeah, John was the big part of that He did the animations for it and they've got people loved those and we thought yeah We thought they were absolutely awesome. So yeah, check out John's great work And we got to meet John on this night. We're talking about Inod. Anyway, so beautiful Irish theme night here tonight.

I'm lifting up the Velvet rope, and I'm reading the first name off the list is from Taupeau in the Bay of Plenty New Zealand. It's Fraser Cameron. Bay of Plenty, plenty of good times tonight. Welcome in Fraser. I'd also love to welcome in from Redcar in England in Great Britain shone Oliver. Oh I'm just like showing this on me in all of a red car red car He's got fast. Oh please sir. May I have some more of you cuz you're the best

Okay, all of a twist. Yes, no, it's got five. Please sir, may I have some more of you because you're the best. Nice. Okay. All of the twists. Yes, no, it's good. Woo! Thank you, Joe. I'd love to say to welcome in from Croydon in Sorry Great Britain, Adam Knight. Well, you know, it wasn't gonna be a good night.

It's gonna be a great night, man. Yes! For Adam. And finally from Thatford, sorry about the pronunciation there, probably in great Britain, it's Philip Greer! Welcome in! Woo! Bring it up to Greer!

Am I a best man? See? See? Thank you so much. Believe in yourself. That is your best one in months. Bring it up to Greer. He was the last entrance. What do you mean? Thank you so much. That is your best one in months He was a lot of time trim what do you mean?

It wasn't gonna be a good not and now it is gonna be a good I mean that was also very I'm not that tag big of a compliment It is that was your best one in months It's the worst thing I do in my life? These two minutes away. Yes. I don't know how I've absolutely painted myself into this corner. I'm so glad to do it. I'm so glad to do it.

Oh, yeah. It's all good stuff. Oh, very good stuff. I think that's hype, Raoul. Come on. That brings us to the end of the episode. What a fun silly time of ad. That was, and thank you so much again to Cam and Alexi.

All of the podcasts they do, you've heard them, if you've never heard them before, you instantly know that, just really fun, funny dudes. So funny, honestly, my face hurt from laughing, that was really fun. Really fun. Yeah, so it was a real pleasure to have them on the show, but yeah, definitely check out Finding Drago and Finding Desparado. And if you haven't heard of either, I would go back and just start out Finding Drago and Finding Desparado. And if you haven't heard of either, I would go back and just start from Finding Drago

because they mentioned it in Desparado a couple of times with minus spoilers. Saurik and... Yeah, start from the beginning. Start from the beginning and really... Really is scripting. It's one of those things you will smash it out in a couple of days.

Yeah, it's really great. And so funny and interesting. It's great. Just listen. Okay. So good. So Dave, but this baby home. Thanks so much for listening everyone.

We'll be back next week with another couple of episodes. I think maybe even next week you might even be a Christmas special. Oh. Which is pretty exciting. But you can get in contact with us at anytime, dogoonpod.com is a place you go there. You can find our merchandise. Yeah, we are now sending back around all over the world.

Anyone can get a t-shirt or a badge. I sent one to Brazil the other day. That's cool. That is cool. First one to Brazil, pretty cool. I love that. I love it. Anyone can suggest a topic for our website,

dogoonpod.com, and that's where you'll also find our Patreon. We'll also link to our Facebook, our Twitter, our Instagram. We've got a YouTube channel where you can actually vote up the Colourbomb Highest episode if you want to give that a bit of love, because that's the one where people have cracked it out. And, yeah, email us, dogoonpod.gmo.com, but yeah, thanks again for listening. And until next week, I'll say thank you and goodbye!

Bye! Bye! Bye! Bye! Bye! Bye! Bye! Bye!

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