Two In The Think Tank - 282 - P.T. Barnum ; "The Greatest Showman"

Episode Date: March 17, 2021

Surely a man depicted by Hugh Jackman was a great guy .... right? Well, that's a little questionable. But you still have to admit that P.T. Barnum fit a lot into a lifetime, and made a lot of money along the way. This is the story of the REAL "Greatest Showman"Get tickets to our live shows this March/April:Prime Mates: https://www.trybooking.com/BPEUIBook Cheat: https://www.trybooking.com/BPEUEMatt Stewart - Nostalgia Was Better When I Was A Boy (discount code 'dogoon): https://www.comedyfestival.com.au/2021/shows/nostalgia-was-better-when-i-was-a-boyDo Go On: https://www.trybooking.com/BOMAA Matt’s New Interview Show: ‘Matt Your Heroes’: https://youtu.be/VVsVGkzVNZQ Support the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: patreon.com/DoGoOnPod Buy tickets to our streamed shows (there are 12 available to watch now! All with exclusive extra sections): https://sospresents.com/authors/dogoon Check out our AACTA nominated web series: http://bit.ly/DGOWebSeries​ Submit a topic idea directly to the hat: dogoonpod.com/Submit-a-Topic Twitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: [e-mail] Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates:

Hey everybody, Jess and Dave, just jumping in really quickly at the top here to make sure that you are across all the details for our upcoming Christmas show. That's right, we are doing a live show in Melbourne Saturday December the 2nd, 2023, our final podcast of the year, our Christmas special. It's downstairs at Morris House, which usually be called the European beer cafe. On Saturday December the 2nd, 2023 at 4.30pm, come along, come one, come all, and get tickets at dogoonpod.com. This episode is brought to you by Progressive. Most of you aren't just listening right now.

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Take classes online or on campus, and financial aid is available to qualified students, including the GI Bill. Now is the time. Mycomputercareer.edu. Hey everyone, before we start this week's episode, we're just going to tell you that we are doing some exciting live shows. I'm talking podcasts, stand up, and more podcasts. I didn't.

I did not agree to it being exciting. When you say let's do some live shows, I specifically said I will not excite. Oh, don't worry, because do go on the one that you're part of, just will not be excited. Oh, okay, very low key. Those are, I would say, if people are, want a non-exciting show? Yeah, do it in a non-excite show. 8.30pm, March 28th, April 4th, April 11th, April 18th. So four shows, less than 10 tickets left to each of those shows.

A weird thing for me to ask. So if you want to get a group of 11 together, I'm so sorry. Ditch your 11th favorite friend. You don't need Darren, sucks. And get the last 10 tickets. That'd be smart. Yeah. Yeah. All fall on your sword and let 10 people go have a good time and then you can go get a margarita. Yeah. Yeah. I've probably have margarited, tristiclisten. Yeah. So that's Duga1. We're also doing the first ever live primates podcast. I can't believe it. It's been, I don't know how many years in the making,

but a few centuries. Centuries, yeah. I mean, we've evolved to this point. But it's on the fourth and it's on it maybe two o'clock. Yeah, two o'clock, Sunday, April the fourth. Beautiful afternoon session. Good. And it's gonna be you Matt your hosting you're the host of the most But you'll be joined by Some say the greatest guest of all time they call this the dream team and I can't remember if I coin that term or if I listen I did but either way I believe it

It's Nick Mato Mason from planet broadcasting's the weekly planet got it also Mason from Planet Broadcastings, the Weekly Planet. Got it. Also, uh, Cast Page from Sans Pants Radio. Yes, and also... Evan Monroe Smith from GAMEY GAMEY GAMEY. That's right. How did you know?

So that's you guys. That's your secret. Hit the stage, fantastic primates. Then that will basically go straight into... I should say Dave, if you don't know primates of the show or anything about primates, it doesn't matter. It's just going to be a fun, it's going to be a chat. You don't need any pre-existing information. We'll give you all you need.

You'll give out a little pamphletics, my next story, previously on primates. So that's a two-click, four, fifteen. So basically straight after the same venue I'm doing my first ever live book cheat podcast with guests Ben Russell and Michelle Brazier would be disappointed if no one rocks up in a chook outfit. Oh I would love to see the chooks. Please. If I it would be great when I hit the stage, if the audience could go, Buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, b You can listen to that during your meal break and then you can go say Matt stand up show the Victoria Hotel Which is just a couple hundred meters down from the European beer cafe at 6.55 p.m Matt's doing his stand up fantastic. That's all the way through the festival 6.55 on Sunday 7.55 Tuesdays to Saturdays and yes 22 shows bloody hell. It's gonna be good. I reckon

So you should come and if you use the discount code to go on you'll get a discount And yeah, 22 shows, bloody hell, it's gonna be good, I reckon. So you should come. And if you use the discount code, do go on, you'll get a discount. Fantastic. And finally, on that Sunday, the April 4th, which is the biggest day in our podcasting lives, at 8.30 we'll be hitting the stage

for that non-exciting April 4th, do go on podcast. Thank you. Less than 10 tickets left for that one. It's a bit of a chill, you know? And all of the others. Can you do me a favor and both remember to eat something in between? Yeah.

Well, I won't be, I'll only be watching Bookcheat, so I'll loudly munch away. Like someone did at a Brisbane Comedy Festival show at Miron 1, so I'll bring a packet of minties and I'll hand it out to everyone else in the front row and loudly chew them. I would actually laugh if someone did that. So yeah, we hope to see you there. All those shows are on sale now and the tickets are in the description, the links in the description of this episode. Hope to see you there! Hello and welcome to another episode of Dugo on my name is Devonagi and as always I'm here with Matt Stewart and Jess Perkins. I'm Jess Perkins!

Who are you? I'm Matthew Stewart. But before we hear more from them, hear more from me, telling you that this show, if you I'm Matthew Stewart. Before we hear more from them, hear more from me. Telling you that this show, if you haven't heard it before, we take it in turns to research a topic often suggested by one of our good-looking listeners. And we take that topic. We raise it to you.

We're all hot. Thank goodness. This has happened a bit. That high average out there. Take the compliment. So go away, research the topic, bring it back to the others. It's Jess's turn to bring us the info. Matt and I don't know what the subject's gonna be,

so she's gonna start with a question. The question is, who was known as the greatest showman even before Kid Rock? Oh, that guy that Hugh Jackman played in a movie? Yes. Hugh Jackman. No. Wolverine. No.

No, Van Helsig. Not Van Helsig. What's his name? It's like PL Travers. Oh, PT Barnum. PT Barnum. He's out of town. He really did an assistant.

That was a great. Thank you, Mr. Gays, for the assistant. Now where he's Mr. Copeland. Yes, PT Barnum has been suggested by many, many people whose names are, has follows. Fantastic. Alex, Nick Viderosa, Braden, Andre, Jared, Jared Schaefer, most of these people, don't have a name. Is that two separate Jared?

Sorry, no, just Jared Shaffer. Kerry John Jones, Jordan, Teneal, Odie Matthews, James Clark, Stephanie Keller, Keith Ross, Chris Brown, all those crazy. The Captain and Teneal. I don't think I've heard of another Teneal apart from the Captain End, and I'm not even sure what the Captain and Tineal is. Is that ringing any bells? I can't know if I'm a little girl. Is that something?

So, sir. Is that an album or an artist or something? Yeah, maybe. My question is, is this like a topic you don't want to be associated with? Because more people than usual just gave their first names. And I'm wondering, is there some twists and turns in that you embarrassed to say all right do

PT bottom I'm trying to Google Captain to Neil Captain and to Neil is a Captain John American recording artists whose primary success occurred in the 1970s husband and wife team there you go husband and wife cap imagine if your husband or wife was called the captain. Captain Darrell Dragon. Oh my God. He's the last him he's dragon and they didn't use that. Born August 27, too. Wow. And his wife Tony Taneel. Tony Taneel's fantastic. So he used her last name, but not dragon.

What? Surely dragon and to Neil Captain to girls pretty good pretty good anyway an early Side track, but Dave that is a very good point This a lot of people suggested this around the time that the greatest showman film came out in 2017 right Obviously painting PT Barnum as you know somebody who just wants to put on a show and make something of himself and a lot of people in their suggestions were kind of going, the movie really glorifies a not a great dude. Oh right. I didn't see the movie so I don't know anything about him.

Not from the fact that he sings any dancers. That's right. Any plays with elephants. And I thought in a good way, but now I'm wondering if it was. Playing with a couple of trunks. Um. Hey. Sorry. Have you seen the movie Jess?

Yes. Because I have not. Oh, okay. Um, I mean, I don't want to. Shit, I don't know if people really love it. It's a fine film. It's like a hungover Sunday kind of film. Because it was like a surprise hit, wasn't it?

Yeah, I think it was, it was very popular. And the soundtrack was like the biggest selling album of the year. It was really. It was so millions crazy copies. Yeah some of the songs in there are really great. Was Kid Rock on it? Unfortunately he there was a clash and he's schedule. So he builds himself as the greatest showman doesn't it? No he had a he well he's got a song and I think he was doing a show, like a tour that was called The Greatest Show on Earth. And... God, yeah.

He was sort of like threatened to be sued by a group of circuses who were the greatest show on Earth. So he had to change it. But that just made me laugh, so I thought I'd squeezy. It's funny that you can copyright. The greatest show. Calling yourself a good show. Yeah.

Yeah. I don't like circuses. I'll put that out there early. As in the ones, any or the ones with animals. Because of their copyright. And I think any. And the ones with animals are probably worse. Have you seen Cirque du Soleil?

I saw the Beatles Cirque du Soleil when I was in Vegas. That's right. Yes. But it was the end of a five-day Vegas trip and I was not in a good way. Yeah, it's fair enough. I bought an oversized Beatles Cirque du Soleil beer and I could not, I couldn't hardly, I was falling asleep. Yeah, anyway. During the show there was a power outage. Oh no. For like 15 minutes it stopped and we're all like oh this is part of the show and they're like this is not part of the show and we're like this is part of the show oh no yeah this all a power outage in Vegas yeah it was real strong that's ruined vacuists yeah Vegas lost 12 billion dollars in that 15 minutes but you know I mean that was it was was fun, but I've got this weird thing where I see people doing

really impressive stuff. I'm like, yeah, I assume you can do that. You know, you're in a circus. You're on a trapeze, yeah. You know what I mean? If it was you up there, I'm like, we're going down to see Jess. See if she can do a trapeze. I'll be like, oh, this will be fun.

And that, I would find that fun to what. See, because I want to do a trapeze, I'd be like, oh, this will be fun. And that I would find that fun to watch. Because I wanna do a trapeze so bad. Really? So Matt sort of prefers like who dares wins or the like fear factor. Yeah, more than Cirque de Salle. Well, I just want, I mean, if they're definitely gonna, like they never fail in those things.

But they defy physics. Yeah, but I mean, you know what I mean? The expectation is they're gonna do it. So I've just, I don't know, my brain is annoying with that stuff that it's not excited about. Right, but if someone comes up to you on the street and says, hey, wanna see your magic trick, you're like, I am so, yeah.

I'm like, who are you? Have you learned magic? And they're like, I've never done magic before. You're like, yes. Can I believe in you? Here we go. You pull this off. Sorry, weird question. I've never you? Here we go! Can we pull this off? Sorry, weird question.

I've never done magic before. Do you want to be the first person to watch me try? Are I going to do it? Okay, well it's good to know whenever I decide to take up magic. Well, I'm glad we got into this episode quickly. Yes, I do.

Who would? I'm easily impressed. I love magic. I love tricks. So I'll be happy to hear about this. Look, I will say that this guy packed a lot into a lifetime. But let's start from the very beginning. We're going back to the 1800s. PT. What do you think that might stand for? PT Barnum. Personal trainer. Personal trainer. Barnum. You're a P name.

Patrick. No. You won't get it. Philip. All close. Philip. No. Philippineus. No. Patrick. No. Pringles. It is. Finneus Taylor. Oh, great name. Great stuff.

Finneus Taylor Barnum, born and Bethel, Connecticut in 1810. Bethel, that's great. Bethel. I couldn't find a great deal about his early, early life, apart from the fact that his father was an inkeeper, a tailor and storekeeper. And inkeeper. And I was like,

Are you going to be talking about Bethlehem? What, Bethel? Would you say Bethel? Do you mean Bethlehem? Bethel, Bethlehem Connecticut. And inkeeper. Yeah. That sounds ye oldie.

Tom Morris are the jobs, Taylor. Taylor and a storekeeper. Oh, a sober name. And that young Phineas was close to and quite influenced by his maternal grandfather, Phineas Taylor, who was a legislator, Justice of the Peace, and Laurie Schema. Oh, Schema. Yeah, that might make a full sense later on. That's interesting, so he was a law man and a Schema.

Yeah. Well, that's in the business car. Yeah, absolutely, but much smaller print. Under legislator and Justice of the Peace. I'll read this, Bill. Yeah, don't worry about it. So the only other thing that I found out about PT as a kid was that he was a natural salesman and was peddling snacks

and cherry rum to soldiers by age 12. Wow. It's a different time. He was 15 years old when his father died and the support of his mother and his five sisters and brothers fell largely upon his shoulders. So he had several businesses over the next few years, including a general store, a book auctioning trade, real estate speculation, and a statewide lottery network. Didn't go into a lot of information about any of these,

but they all sound interesting. I mean, he's like a doogie houseer of like statewide lottery. A real estate speculation is kind of fun too. Like, I reckon this could be worth something. You're not gonna be able to find a stand what that means. Just got around, going,

I reckon one day that could be worth a bit. I reckon that one's got three bedrooms. Oh, it might be a pool in that bag, man. Gambling against people, all right. You and me, look at this house. We both have to guess how many bedrooms that is. If I'm right, you give me $5. Say, it's one of those terrace houses, but it's two stories, and it could go really far

back. That's right. That could be very small. At the front it looks really old, but they've got a fantastic loft conversion. Could be a two bed up, we don't know. Could be a trick. So after holding a variety of jobs, he became a publisher of a weekly newspaper

in Danbury, Connecticut. Newspaper was called Harold of Freedom. And I believe he started the newspaper. So pretty easy to get a job when you make the job up. Yeah, he's like a real go get a tour. Yeah. A lot of self belief by the same thing. Maybe too much, but yes, definitely a lot of self belief.

I mean, I assume that when he starts a new business because the old one has failed. Yeah, probably yes. And to be able to do this many different businesses, they're failing quickly. Okay, well I gave it a go. Well, 17 I've had 80 business. Yeah, this is in the be able to do this many different businesses. They're failing quickly Okay, well I gave it a go. Well 17. I've had 80 business. Yeah, this is in the space of a few years So yes His editorials against the elders of local churches led to libel suits and a prosecution which saw him imprisoned for two months But some people say he enjoyed the notoriety

So he's you publishing, Elder Jerry Smells Bad. Smells real bad. They're like suing him. Yeah. Did this make the movie? Let us know when the movie starts. The movie is like, oh fuck, I mean, it's been a little while, but I remember Hugh Jackman, yeah, working in a,

you know, going into work and the whole place is being shot down and he's like suddenly out of work. Right. I hope that after I die. Yes. The ultimate compliment in 200 years later is the huge acumen of the day playing you.

Right. Yeah. You're getting cast by an absolute top guy. Lovely man, super hot, can sing, dance, act, like. Australian. And then they're like, yeah, exactly, I love that. Love that.

If you could just want to play me, I feel good. Do you think he's nice? He looks same as nice. Do you think he'd be friendly? I think so. Yeah, I think he is. That's nice. I listened to a podcast interview and he was talking

about how he loves puzzles. And he had a puzzle brand that he recommended. It's a really great quality puzzles, and they really clicked in a place in a satisfying way. Wow. I mean. He sounds fun. Either that or he just has,

he has a recommendation for everything. Yeah. He's got one thing. What? He's talking about puzzles. Oh yeah, I've sent it in my puzzle gun. Well, keyboard, cassio, great brand. Yeah, he's got a guy. What? He's talking about puzzles? Oh yeah, I'll send it to my puzzle guy. Well, keyboards, cassia, great brand. Yeah, he's got a guy for everything, for sure.

On the 8th of November, 1929, the same year he started his newspaper, Barnum married Charity Hallet. Wow. Incredible name. The couple would have four children together over the next 16 years. They had their first kid pretty early,

and then it wasn't like, it was like 10 years before the second one, and then it was like 234. But he was busy, he was working, he was hustling. Maybe he wasn't around as much, who knows. So aside from being a husband, father, and newspaper publisher, things really started to pick up for PT in 1835, when at the age of 25, he began his career in showbiz.

Okay. Okay. Let's remember this is 1835. So he and charity had moved to New York, and PT had tried a couple of different jobs once again, including more newspaper publishing, but it all changed when he met Joyce Heth, an African-American woman, hell as an enslaved person by John S. Bowling and exhibited in Louisville, Kentucky. Exhibited. Yes. Jesus. And this is what they were calling show business. Yep, 1835. She was sold to promoters R.W. Lindsey and Coley Bartram. They also don't want to give their full names.

Yeah, yeah. So shake from that. And R.W. Lindsey, due to Joyce's appearance, which I'll go into in a sec, introduced her as having been the childhood nurse of George Washington, making her over 160 years old. So it was kind of like, come and see this very old woman.

That was the whole point of it. So she was obviously fairly old. I think she was having issues with her eyes. She was, you know, at least part of the lines. Yes, 160 isn't fair, that's very old. I don't want to sound rude. She had some issues with movements, certain parts of her body, she had a very small frame, very deep wrinkles, no teeth, had really long fingernails that were said to have resembled talons. But lacking success in getting audiences to get tickets to see this incredibly old woman,

R.W. Lindsay sold her in her old age to PT Barnum. Well, not sold, actually. Slavery was already outlawed in New York, but PT exploited a loophole, which allowed him to lease her for a year, for $1,000. Right, so he couldn't sell people, he could rent them though. Yeah, you could rent people. What?

I'm not buying it. You can't sell them. That means someone has to own for you to be out of the league. Yeah, but own from a different state. So it's fine in that state, but I'm renting here to New York. Wait, when was slavery abolished? Ah, that's a good question.

I'm not 100% sure. I assume it was before the 1800s. But didn't it happen in kind of a staggered way? Oh, no. It wasn't just like an all in one. Right. I thought that was a Lincoln thing, but I'd regret. I don't but I regret, I don't know.

No, I don't know either. John M. McGougill. Yeah, but I think you are right about stagging away. I think some places are bothering. I remember that from 12 years of slay. Early on, but then I think there's not the whole issue of North first South type thing. And that's why they had the big war.

And that was in the 1800s. I think 65. Yeah, no kidding. I mean that's just like from the first Google, I am pretty sure it sort of happened in New York. Not that I mean I know there was just like Australia had awful stuff well beyond that. Absolutely. So I'm not meaning like as a judgement thing, it's just I was I'm surprised by that but

yeah, absolutely. So I'm not in a glass house over here Oh God no, we've yeah, we've done some horrible. Oh, we're fucked. We're real fucked and like more recently fucked So yeah, he's leasing her for a year thousand dollars for a year not too shabby if we're talking about a car We're talking about a person. It's fucked. So he actually had to borrow $500 in order to make this purchase. He didn't even have enough money. So a lot was writing on it, succeeding for PT. I say succeeding because it's still gross.

So for seven months, Joyce was a traveling exhibit for Barnum, telling stories about Little George and singing a hymn. I've really changed my opinion on you. I'm not saying. He's not coming off well. Is this from the movie? No, this is absolutely amazing. He wasn't singing a little song about this part.

No, he didn't rent a woman. This wasn't on the soundtrack Hugh. But he did make this film and write all of this stuff out of it. I mean, I guess it's probably less of a feel, good film or the sudden. I mean, I was going to say it's loosely based on him, maybe the film, but I'm just defending a film I don't actually care about.

And it's not that loose, like. Because it is his name and stuff, right? Yeah, and even the wife and children's names are the same. So it's like, okay, it's not that loosely based on it. Yeah. But yeah, they don't tell this part. A writer named Eric Lot claims that Joyce earned PT Barnum $1,500 a week, which is a very big amount in that year. If you think about he's paid $1,000 for the

year and he's making it back in a week. Wow, okay. And then some. And thus, Barnum's career as a showman took off. Right, because the other people were obviously doing the same thing exhibiting this poor woman, but they were not making any money. This guy is very good at marketing. Yeah, okay He was like I think I forgot I didn't write it down But it was something like he was referred to as like the Shakespeare of marketing Basically very good at it. He could get bumps on seats. So far the greatest showman is just renting a woman and making money at people looking at her.

The greatest showman in the world. We got to remember that this is the past, the same people that would gather to see a train. Yeah. Oh, and they do. Oh, and they do. And you get to impress. So there were rumors and doubts about Joyce's real age. People going, I don't reckon she is 160. That seems a bit unlikely. No, she is. No. So Barnam did what anybody would do. And he announced that when she died, he'd have her publicly autopsy.

That would put everyone's minds at ease. By the way, she wasn't dead or dying at this point. She was like, what? Yeah, so I didn't agree to that. And everyone's like, nobody wanted that. We're just saying like birth certificate or something. No, no, probably everyone got the round. I'll cut her open. We're doing it in the town hall, town square, get more in.

Okay, you're gonna get a doctor will do that? I'm doing it. I'll do it myself. I'm the greatest showman and or topsy artist. Yeah, I'm calling it the greatest doctor. That's fucked. So yeah, that is what happened because a year later when Joyce Hath passed away in February of 1836, true to his word, Barnum set up a public or top. Public, I did not think I was actually gonna have it. And I was hoping that it's gonna be like rings of a tree. Yeah, I'm gonna say how old this woman is.

I mean, I don't know now how they can just tell how old someone is, but back then I'm imagining their understanding of the body and technology was even more... Uh... Yeah. Unbelievable. Yeah, sure. Unbelievable.

Believe it. Unbelievable. What am I trying to go for? Unreliable maybe? Who knows? This shit. What's this shit? I'm not sure how you tell how old someone is. They check with leeches. Oh, bones. Bones. Now? Okay. Now or then? When I... Did you miss your first TV show? I had to tell I had to... Oh my god! To record bones? Oh my god. I don't want to miss it. Emily, you touched an owl. Oh, I had to tell him to record bones. Oh my god.

I don't want to miss it. Emily, does she know? I want bones. When I got braces, because I was young for braces, I got them when I was 11, they x-rayed my hands to see how much growing I had to do. Because you start with heaps and heaps of bones in your hands, and as you grow, they form and you have less bones in your head. All right, so a hundred and six year old woman in theory would just be one solid bone.

One big bone. That's why she couldn't move all that well. Right. She's one bone. She's one bone. You explain to me that again, you've got more bones in your hands as you get older. You have less bones. When you're a kid, you've got like lots and lots of little bones in your hands. Oh, like baby bones. Yeah, like baby teeth.

Exactly. And as you grow. You lose like baby teeth exactly and as you grow you lose them they fall out they fall out I can't think of now so I get the bone the bone ferry comes yeah that's $50 a bone it's pretty good sex with your parents they've come in behind yeah yeah yeah yeah I'm the bone ferry gunning and forming bone ferry is this like, kind of sweaty hairy guy. With wings. On the boat fairy, no questions asked. All right, let's do this.

It's all good. Come on, I got a 730. Let's get this done. It's a living thing. It's a cigarette thing in out of his mouth. Just a mentioning, Barney Gumball and these dresses like crusty the clown he just looks terrible. Yeah. And you don't have to tell me if I'm wrong about that.

Barney Gumball is the perfect bone. Yeah. The bone fairy. The bone fairy. So Barney Gumball gets a surgeon on board, Dr. David L. Rogers, who performed with the autopsy on the 25th of February 1836 in front of 1500 spectators in New York City, Saloon. Okay, so the thing we were joking about before, that's what actually...

Not what God. 15,500 people came out to watch a woman get autopsy and PT of course charged 50 cents admission. How you saying step right up sort of? Yeah, 100 cents. You're seeing the rating? 750 cents. Do you want a bit of MC work?

Yeah. Mexican waves going on. Yeah, he's got a Madonna mark on. Well, he's. Ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much for coming down today. He's interviewing people. Hey, wherever you come from, why they've got like the sore opening the page.

Oh! Yeah, I don't like him. Yeah. Is that okay? No, it's absolutely fine. Is it a classic judging someone on today's standards? Yes, but also, I mean. That seems like it would have been fucked even. Yeah, that seems fucked even then.

I feel like there's a point in this report where you kind of forget some of the fucked stuff. Right. And then I'll remind you again. Looking forward to his like six or seven years of charity work. Well, you're like, what a guy. Not quite. In the autopsy, Dr. Rogers revealed that shock horror, this woman wasn't 160 years old,

but was in fact more likely around 80 years old. That was PT like shut the fuck up. Oh, you know, he did. He insisted that the autopsy victim was another person oh my well I I Why do you and then he said he believed it obviously oh my god I assumed he was gonna like Pay off the autopsy that's what you know whatever or just fake it. I can't believe he He obviously thought she was 160 and he he said, it's another person.

Joyce Hath is alive. She's on tour in Europe. Wait, why? And then later admitted it was a hoax. What a weird lie. And he is now. I'm sorry. No, she didn't actually die.

I've done this to prove that she was older, but I faked it in a bad way with a woman half her age. No refunds. So strange. So strange. So weird. Just awful. But what is true is that I did work with Paul Woman to death.

Yes. 10 to 12 hour days she would work. He's making a lot of money off her. And his career as a showman is often running. All thanks to his exploitation of an enslaved black elderly woman. Very, very cool. Is this the part where we forget what he did? No, that will come soon though. Well, no actually. So over the next year he had mixed success with a variety show that he put together. You're so right. He's just like trying businesses, they're failing.

He just does something else. He does not give up at any point. So he's got this variety show that is put together. It's called Bannon's Grand Scientific and Musical Theatre. Catchy. Yeah. There are so many catchy show names through this. Truly remarkable. So what is it, Grand Scientific? Grand Scientific and Musical Theatre. Well, you had me into a musical theatre. Grand Scientific. Grand Scientific. I mean musical theater. Well, you had me into a musical theater. Grand scientific. Grand scientific. I mean musical theater. So is that I mean that's why you never would watch this movie because it's is it a musical? Yeah. I'm picturing Hugh Jackman singing his way through some of this awful awfulness. Yeah. And he said there's a real savior because he's sort of like giving all these people

who are different a safe place and a sense of family. And maybe... Exploding them. Yeah, oh, absolutely. Maybe there was a small sense of that for some of these people, but you look at it especially through today's lens and you're like, fuck an hell, man. So then the panic of 1837, which was essentially a great depression with a much better name. The panic?

Oh, the panic. Love that. Did he? And you knew that was coming up in the movie because he said, it has been a pretty rough day. And then the band come out behind him and he sings, we got no money, got no money, we'll go and went to a panic today. Hey, we got no money, we got no money, we'll go went to panic today. Hey, we got no money, we got no money.

And then there's people sort of like wearing like chimney sweep outfits or clicking down low to the ground. Is that? And then one of them does a tap solo. Yeah. And there's people dressed as 50 dollar bills and then somebody cuts them in half. And they made that sort of stage. Oh, yes. Yeah. But then one of them actually gets cut in half. Yeah, that's deep symbolism. They were sued. Really? Yeah, wow.

And this was only a couple of years ago. Yeah, 2017. This is every time. There's some about musicals that I'd find. I nearly... Oh! Bob just just held. Just as well.

Elbow, Dave's mic. Alright, final. I'll start talking. You wouldn't even talking. You wouldn't know this day because you don't watch musicals, but yeah, they sort of talk there. They're talking and you know they're about to do a song. Yeah, because the music starts.

Then you're like, oh fuck, here we go. The first one whenever you, I watch a movie because the collective side. Whenever I see a movie and I don't realize the musical I'm like That that first song that that's happening like oh you fucking kidding No, no have a phone. I got to read the blurb I can't get up and live I can actually apart from Annie of course Oh, yeah, I was indoctrinated into that I can actually. Apart from Annie, of course. Oh, yeah.

I was indoctrinated into that as a kid or something. You loved Annie so much. Daddy wall bucks. Why do I smell wet dog? Oh, I've never seen the movie, but I think about that line a lot. Yeah, when your dog is wet. Yep. Yeah, they do smell.

So the character's name is Daddy wall bucks. Yeah. I mean, if I was soft for the first time now, I would hate it. But because it's gotten nostalgia all over it, because it was set in the early 1900s, which was, I think, when I was going through my third divorce. Sharon! I missed your Sharon! You're a third wife, Sharon.

Yeah. We did talk about Sharon. Thanks, please. Sorry. a third wife, Sharon. Yeah. We don't talk about Sharon. Thanks, please. Sorry, Birmingham, Sharon. Yeah, a great depression. It made Showbiz life a little difficult. I'll do you.

So it looked around for something that he thought would be a little more stable than a traveling variety show. And somehow, outmaneuvered wealthier bitters to acquire John Scutt's American museum in New York City. A five-story marble building filled with stuffed animals, taxidermy animals, wax work figures. Not a little teddy bear.

Yeah, I don't. Stuff, I kept reading stuffed animals, I'm like, okay, and they're like, oh, taxidermy, okay. Wax work figures and similar conventional exhibits. It's a museum. During a great depression, people don't have disposable income to spend on watching a person as you know a prisoner

For a bit. Yeah, but they do have money for saying dead animals. Yes, I've And just sitting and paying admission obviously, you know where all guards are a pretty tough time But we still got a taxi dummy budget. Yeah everyone goes to the see some dead animals once a week Yeah, obviously Sunday church taxi. Yeah, obviously. Sunday, church, taxiduma. You kidding me? The kids love it. They love it! We get fro you!

They love it! Only two industries do well in depressions. Yeah, taxiduma. An alcohol. What a combo though, right? Great combo. I love to get drunk and taxiduma. What's that?

She used to you, alligator. Was that license? The venue? Yeah. They go hand in hand, don't they? Oh, I'm going to go see a lemur. Yeah, can I get a ticket to the lemur taxidermy enclosure and a couple of bruises? A couple of bruises. Need to take the edge off. Much better audience to watch stuff lemurs if I've had a couple. Absolutely. I am much better to the lemma. So he quickly transformed the museum into a carnival of human curiosity.

Sorry, I think that might be. Yeah, but I'm pretty sure it's pronounced carnivala. Carnivala of human curiosity. Yeah, that does mean... That does mean... Means freak show. Yeah, okay. Well, actually, it means human beings.

Yeah, not respecting... No, sorry, I forget. We've been real soyboys here, aren't we? He's giving him a place to fill family. Beautiful five story marble building. People can ogle them. Yeah, so it's not just human curiosities. There's also dramatic theatricals, beauty contests,

and other sensational attractions. Of course, renaming it, Barnum's American Museum, loves to put his name on shit. This is a quote from Britannica. It says, playing upon the public's interest in the unusual and bizarre, Barnum scoured the world for curiosities, living or dead, genuine or fake. By means of outrageous stunt, repetitive advertising,

and exaggerated publicity, Barnum excited international attention and made his showcase of Wonders a landmark. So he's very good at marketing and he searches pretty far and wide. I even read in one article that there was an Australian guy, an Aboriginal guy in the show at one point. Okay. I'm like, oh wow, that's a long way to go to get someone. He was like the best tightrope walker.

Yeah, really interesting. Anyway, but I only read that in one article and I didn't find a lot of information about where Barnum found lots of different people. So I was like, so the museum hosted a changing series of live acts and curiosities that were added to the exhibits of taxi-dermyed animals, including jugglers, magicians, exotic women.

Not sure what that means. I thought is that juggling women? Yes, juggling exotic women. Detailed models of cities and famous battles. Something for everyone. For the next of the exotic women. A menagerie of animals. Fuck, I love that word.

Stuffed? No, real ones. I don't like stuffed ones. And probably the most fucked, people with various conditions such as albinism or dwarfism. Oh. The museum was hugely popular. Between 1842 and 1868, it attracted 82 million visitors. Over how many years?

1842 to 1868. That's crazy. Huge. People came from all over to see the attractions that Barman and Provided. I read that the roof was transformed into a strolling garden with a view of the city where he launched hot air balloon rides every day. You could get a hot air balloon ride

from the top of this museum. Wow, he's really transformed it. Yeah, big time. Yeah, and just squeezing everything into a puzzle. It's like he designs a museum like Homer Simpson designs a car. Yeah. He's probably approaching it a museum like Homer Simpson designs a car He's probably approaching it a bit like like a Disneyland kind of thing obviously Disneyland didn't exist But you know what I mean just like anything we can do to make it bigger and better and spectacular and whatever

Do I have laser tag obviously Dave that's a given dodge them cars? Yeah, it's in given. Dogemcast, do your cards in the basement. Love that shit. Love it. Wackamoll. It's from, from... Wackamoll isn't meant to be a play on Wackamoll. He always assumed it was a play on words, apparently not.

Really? What a waste. Is that really what you down as the punking? That's how I like to say it, I say. That would be a pun. Hey darling, pass the Gwackamoll. Look at a really Gwackamoll, you know what I mean? That's how I like to say it. That would be a pun. Hey darling, pass the guacamole. Look at a really guacamole, you know what I mean?

I've got some corn chips and they're a little dry. Were you at the time zone or whatever as a kid calling it guacamole? Yeah, that's what I thought. I was assuming that's what it was. I can't wait to play guacamole. You know, like a play on guacamole. My favorite food as a child. A lot of them, it's a bit spicy, too.

I love it. Honestly, would have been a brand new food to Australia, but I don't know how to do it. It's guacamole. Guacamole. Wow. Wow. Geez, get that out of my house.

Let's go back in time. Well, honey, how large a dough. Okay, you know, some of the brotha guacamole. Do I put it into it. Tony, how loud do you do? Someone's brought the guac. Do I put it on my chops? What do I do with this? This is from Wikipedia. In 1842, Barnum introduced his first major hoax, a creature with the body of a monkey

and the tail of a fish. Oh, this is a, an exfiles episode, I'm pretty sure. Did they call it a VG mermaid in that too? Yeah, they do reference things like that. Yeah, I think that yeah The VG mermaid. I think I think that's right. I didn't know that was him. Yeah, or is he? Well, he leased it from a fellow museum owner named Moses Kimball Kimball It's the kind of thing that like a molder has like a a poster or something on the wall Yeah, right. Yeah, I'm sure that would yeah, there's some sort of reference to that I think I don't know about this molder

And I mean it was obviously a hoax But he justified his hoaxes by saying that they are advertisements to draw attention to the museum He said I don't believe in juping the public But I believe in first attracting and then pleasing them. I don't believe in juping them. Fooling them? Yes. Yeah, but juping, I shall not. Making our souls of them sure, but I'll never jupe.

He followed the mermaid by exhibiting Charles Stratton, a little person called General Tom Thum, and the tagline was the smallest person that ever walked alone, who was stated to be 11 years old, but was actually four years old. Oh, okay. It was a toddler. He was just a toddler. The young boy was taught to imitate people like Hercules and Napoleon.

He was drinking wine by age five and smoking cigars by age seven from the public's amusement. Just a very brief tangent here about childon as well, because he had an amazing life. I looked at his Wikipedia briefly and like, yeah, wow. So he did his first tour of America at the age of five. Then a year later, Barnum took him on a tour of Europe and he quickly became an international celebrity.

He met Queen Victoria, two at Europe for three years before returning to America where his start and continued to grow and his popularity and celebrity surpassed that of any actor within his lifetime. He was huge. It was a massive star. Charles Stratton. A general Tom Thumb was like the character at a stage name. He was one of the most famous people on Earth at the time. Yes, and he was a child still. Right, oh yeah, he's the toddler. Yes.

So I got slightly distracted because I found the episode. It's called Humbug. Yeah, well, okay. Season two, episode 20, Molda believes the murderer to be the mysterious Fiji mermaid, which Scully argues is only a hoax, a mere humbug. Huh!

Peter Adams referred to as a humbug a while ago. Ah, right. There you go. Yeah. So, from Wikipedia as well, Stratton's first performance in New York marked a turning point in the history of freak show entertainment. Before Stratton's debut, the presentation of human curiosities for entertainment was deemed dishonorable and seen as an unpleasing carnival attraction. However, after viewers were introduced to Stratton

and his performances, he was able to change the perception people held towards freak shows. Stratton's lively and entertaining performances made these types of carnival shows one of the most favored forms of theatrical entertainment in the United States. So it's interesting that we're kind of going, oh, it's a different time. Maybe people are interested in this, but it seems like people won't for a really long time. They're kind of like, oh, that seems a bit unsavory. It's not a nice thing to do. And then people like Charles Stratton kind of turn that around.

Yeah, right. Fascinating. See, yeah, he's a turning point for the kind of entertainment that the Barnum was peddling. And the two were actually lifelong friends. Under Barnum's management, Stratton became a really wealthy man. He owned a house in the fashion or part of New York. He had a steam yacht.

He had, you know, fine clothes. Wow, steam yacht money. Yeah, he's got steam yacht money. Oh, no dream reveal. Oh, wow. But that is interesting, because I was fearing that it was gonna be all that money was going to burn him, but.

Yeah, he's. I bet you he's still taking more than his fair share. Probably. He's got four steam yachts. But they were like very good friends and later in life when Barnum got into financial difficulty, Stratton bailed him out. There you go.

Yeah. So it's a very strange situation because Barnum took a toddler and exploited him and made a lot of money off him. But Charles had a very full life and a long career and didn't seem to have any animosity towards Barnum. So it's sort of like, I can't speak on your behalf and be like, this guy sucks, because it seems like you were probably friends. But it feels as an outsider, a little bit fucking weird.

Yeah, especially because I mean, maybe it, you know, as a toddler, maybe he's never knew any different. But yeah, exactly. Yeah, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, Yeah, who knows, maybe, because it doesn't sound like the best life being a well-known celebrity to me. Yeah, I know.

The pap in you all the time, was he in PAPT? Getting PAPT? Oh, so many PAPS. They're like, hang out with a long lens and watch him on the steam yacht. Yeah. All full stuff. He's in Woman's Day every week. Catch him at a horrible moment where he looks really like he's lost, you know?

Yeah. Too much weight or the other way around. Right. Just one of those, just shadow tricks and then they're like, front know. Yeah. Too much weight or the other way around. Right. Just one of those. Just shadow tricks and then they're like front page. Yeah. Got him. Can't believe you do it. Yeah. This stuff like, is this toddler packing a bit too much weight? That sort of stuff. Puppy fat. Yeah. So stuff like, great. Here we go. GQ Magazine. Is that one of them? You bloody terms. That's not, that's not I kind of make a magazine. So the European to

I can think of a single trash mag. Woman's day. Woman's day. I did say that one. All right, great. So the European to is making Barnum a lot of money. And it's opening doors for him and he's able to acquire dozens of new attractions and even buy up more museums He's buying multiple museums like he's got investment museums at this point He's really proughing everyone else out of the museum What a way to live for it's got a museum cartel. Oh, no, yeah This is not how I think of museums. I think a museum is maybe evolved a bit over time

They don't normally have hot air balloon rides at the top. Well, I mean, maybe if Melbourne Museum had a bloody hot air balloon. They do have a lot of, they're used to be at least in the Melbourne Museum of Big Taxidermy Room. Yeah. It's shut down this year. What? Yeah, there are a few people up in arms because their kids love it.

It is Australia. I've only went to it once. It was a very odd space. The room full of, there's a large collection. I've only went to it once. It was a very odd room full of large collection of really old taxi dummy animals. I don't remember the places we went, but there was when we were in the UK last, I went to a museum and there was, yeah, rooms and rooms of taxi dummy. And I was like, I mean, it's interesting because I've never seen that animal before, but also gross. You don't think you've seen it before, it's just bad taxidermy.

Ah, yes. I was like, ha, a street cat. Oh, wow. Okay. The koala with like really big eyebrows and a, hmm, human ears. We lost a few of the bits we have to make do.

Ha, ha, ha. You get the idea. Also during this European tour, Bannon became aware of a Swedish soprano, oh that's fun to say, Swedish soprano named Jenny Lind, often referred to as the Swedish knighting girl, who was gaining a lot of popularity. Barnum, who had a keen eye for an opportunity and had never seen Jenny perform, approached her to sing in America for a thousand dollars a night for 150 nights, all expenses paid. Wow, that's a big commitment.

It's huge. He's never heard of singing. Oh, dear. But he's just like, she's popular. I've got a, I'm gonna jump on the, you know, the ground floor. And then she arrives and he goes, sorry, that money was a hoax, but what I do is I bring you in

and then show you a good time. And a sense of family. Oh, you have a family. I've leased you now. Yeah. Sorry, I own you. You're gonna be over there. Mind, mind, mind, mind.

Jenny had a reputation for morality and philanthropy and apparently could sing. So he saw it as an easy sell to the American audience. I can sing. I can sing. So he saw it as an easy sell to the American audience. I can sing! She insisted on having Julius Benedict, a German conductor, composer and pianist, with whom she'd worked in England, and the Italian baritone Giovanni Bolletti as assisting artists. Because at the time, solo recitals were still an un... they weren't a done thing to American audiences.

Okay, you need a support band. Yeah, exactly right. So Benedict's fee was $25,000. Beledis was $12,500. All told, Barnard had committed to $187,500. So approximately $5.7 million today. Oh my goodness, he's never heard this woman sing. All of that to bring Linda and her musical truth to America,

he's never heard her sing. She asked for her fee up front. Clever. Very, very good. Which he wasn't used to and he did not have. So he borrowed heavily on his mansion and on his museums, but he was still short. So he persuaded a Philadelphia minister that lend would be a good influence on American morals. And the minister lent him the final $5,000.

So there's a lot riding on this. Yeah. He has not heard of seeing most of her feet. So she's asked for like about four million bucks up front. Yeah. Oh my God. I love to know that ministers are just sitting on a stack of cash as well. Five grand. You know, like Jesus would do. So lend and a small company sales to America in September 1850, but she was a celebrity even before she arrived because of Barnum's months of preparations. So like I said, he is King of Spain, he's very good at marketing and he's sort of like built up some hype. Close to 40,000 people greeted her at the docks and another 20,000 at her hotel.

Wow, that's a good sign. If they could all chip in three bucks each, he'd be absolutely loving. Absolutely covered. I'm sure he was charging tickets for the standing on the streets. The press was also in attendance and Jenny Lind items were available to buy.

He's already got merch, no one's heard of seeing. The Jenny Lind barbie out. When she realized how much money Barnum stood to make from the tour, she insisted on a new agreement. She smart, which he signed on the 3rd September 1850. Well, I did not expect him to do that.

Yeah, that's, yeah. I mean, you are underp and also, by the way, everything that she's making is going to charity. Oh, right. That's interesting. Sorry, what? Yeah, that's why she's fighting hard to get more money. She's like, making is going to charity. Oh, right. That's interesting. Sorry, what? Yeah, that's why she's fighting hard to get more money. She's like, this is all for charity.

Because I feel like she's like, I'm happy with that amount of money. Oh, you're doing a really good job at marketing me? Well, I want more than. Yeah. Tricky, but yeah, that's, that's fair enough. But it also like, if he's, I mean, she's doing people there to see her, she should be paid accordingly. That's true, yeah.

You know, it should be, I mean, yeah. I guess the initial agreement, yeah, isn't that the part point of the promoter is they're the ones wearing the risk so they make. Oh, exactly right, yeah. But I think the fact that yeah, she's doing it all for charity, I'm like, yeah, no, good on you. Yeah, I did not, that's amazing. Oh, yeah, look, I don't, I don't know if I've come

to a strong position on this. No, no, no. And I just realized I'm sticking out for this real piece of shit. Yeah, I think maybe I'm more on who side, just because he's a person. Yeah, what about you, you're gonna mat back the guy that's enslaving people or the woman who's singing the charity.

For sure, yeah, and yeah, like Jess says, the performer should be making the line, she didn't think. So yeah, they come up with a new agreement. This gave her her original fee of $1,000, plus the remainder of each concert's profits after Barnum took five and a half grand management fee. Yeah. Anything that made it by that profit she gets. Yeah, that feels like more that profit she gets. Yeah, that feels pretty good. So yeah, she's just determined to accumulate as much money as she can for charities.

The contract also gave Lynn the option of withdrawing from the tour after 60 or 100 performances, paying Barnum $25,000 if she did so. So she's doing a minimum 60, hopefully 150, but she's got two points where she can jump off if needed. Right, so like on Who Wants To Be Millionaire? Yeah. Got the guaranteed point. Yeah.

That's locked. You've got that guaranteed. Yeah. Will you risk it for the biscuit? Lock it in. It sounds like it was a pretty wild time as well. So her first two American performances were given as charity concerts in New York City on the 11th and 13th of September in 1850.

At Castle Garden, now better known as Castle Clinton, tickets were sold at auction two days beforehand, 4,476 tickets were sold at a total price of $24,000. For one concert. Yep. With the theater packed to its utmost capacity. Wow, okay. Just packed out completely.

Tickets for some of her concerts were in such demand that Barnum sold them by auction, and public enthusiasm was so strong that the press coined the term, Linde Mania. That's amazing. He's invented this. Yeah. This is all out of nothing. Yeah.

Like, she wasn't known there at all. That is incredible. No. He'd never heard of a scene. No. She didn't feel that comfortable with the commercialization of the ticket auctions and asked that a substantial number of tickets be available at a reduced price, like a $1 or $2. A lot of legend. She's been to the ballot.

She's awesome. That is also hurting the money she's making for charity, but she's trying to let the... Yeah, but what's the most soothing, the average person in? Yeah. What's going to help money or hearing her sing, are true. This is from Wikipedia, so this is like a review from one of the shows. After Linda had left the platform to tumultuous applause, Barnum took to the stage, and although she'd asked him not to do so,

told the audience that she was taking no fee for herself and donating her entire fee of $10,000 to 12 New York charities. A reporter commented, the deafening shots that followed the speech were absolutely indescribable. They're really staunch, capitalists over there. They would have hated it. Boom!

This sentence is fun, though. Many, even among the male portion of the audience, weeping with emotions. Whoa! Men! Weeping! Never heard of it. It's a different time. It's possible! I've heard of dogs crying.

I only recently heard about that before we start you nearly cried yourself at the concept of dogs crying I can't believe dogs can cry. Oh, it is tragic. Yeah, it is and you're like, I know you just want food That's my dog. He's like, oh You're in a room I can see you in I see you in. Oh, how strong. And one day they're gonna invent a machine that lets dogs talk and they're gonna be like, release us.

We live in pain, we don't want to be pets. But say it. No, they're gonna say, can I have a treat? I love you, I love you. Can I have a treat? It's fun when we go outside. Can we do that now? Whenever we go outside, I assume you're gonna release me. I'm gonna be okay. I'm you. No, I'm sure you. It's fun when we go outside. Can we do that now? Whenever we go outside, I assume you're gonna release me.

I'm gonna go. I'm mad. You always make me come back. Your backyard is like a prison. I don't just watch me in the shower. Okay. There's a kind of bit of a poo. Gooses are poo.

I like to call him a poo. All right, poo, get it out of it. It was following me into it. My bedroom was like, it dressed. I'm like, get it out of there, pear. Get it out of there. So look at me like that. Stop it.

I think it's such a, like, he's got no expression on his face. I'm like, are you disgusted by me? I don't know. That's when he's crying. It's ugly. I know. Please, please put some clothes on. Please, it's so white.

It blinds me. It's so white. Look at it, my naked body is like looking directly at the sun. It burns. So that's for all you pervs out there. Don't try it. That's right, people. I will hurt your eyes.

So anyway, people, even men crying. I can't, I can't picture it. They, at the thought of her giving the charity. They absolutely loved her. The tour was a massive success. I mean, she was a very talented singer. Luckily, I personally would have wanted to hear a sing before booking her for 150 shows, but that's just me.

Yeah, a bit of an audition on the street. Um, so wherever the tour went, Barnum whipped up publicity. Largely thanks to his 26 journalists he had on his payroll. Oh, that's clever. He's got journals on a retainer. The best he's writing, press releases and published them. Absolutely, yes. Yeah, yeah.

He's got journals and no surgeons though, for his all-tops. Yeah. He probably does by now. Yeah, He's got one surgeon on retainer. Yeah, because the first guy, he was like, okay, now I know, bribe them first. So he marketed various Jenny-Lind branded products, including songs, clothes, chairs and pianos. Oh yeah.

He official Jenny-Lind chair. Yeah. He's still on Jenny-Lind. I also read there was even more marketing material made and I'm not sure if this was him or like other people profiting as she sort of came to town. Yeah, like an English geezer on the street with a pile of t-shirts and chairs. Well, yes, there were chairs. I opened the jacket with a chair and thought, go on, have a seat on that. Have a seat. Have a seat, you toy.

Take a load off, you toy. Take a load off you toy. Fuck. Five squid. They say squid over there. That's one of the cool things. There were Jenny Linde shirts. Jenny Linde Cravettes. Jenny Linde Gloves.

Jenny Linde Pocket Hanker Chips. Jenny Linde Cotes. Jenny Linde Hats. And even Jenny Linde Sossages. Made from real Jenny Lindt, mate. Yes. Wow. Wow.

After New York, the company toured the East Coast with continued success, and later went through the southern states and to Cuba. At one point, traveling by a ship to Charleston, South Carolina, a short but perilous voyage during which they came close to being sunk by a storm. The ship at one point was reported lost. Oh, it's like this crazy journey there on. Wow, and it was supposed to be a three hour tour, a three hour tour and the red, genuine. She'd be making the man cast. So, yeah. Wait, why did you say Ash about to Charleston? Yeah.

That feels like an inland place. Yeah. But I don't really know that. Where's South Carolina, Dave? It's East-East-East Coast. But were they going from Cuba or something? Maybe, yeah. So were they call it a wet border?

They have a wet border. Are they wet? They do have a wet border. OK. They are they are they're not Gopped by sea, but they are near it. They got a flank you right Dave. They must have been coming from Cuba. Oh right. Thank you for that because I was like I'm just accepting what I've read Um, there were lots to see online I know lost on land and they found their map again. See you I never lost on land and then I found their math again. Sea land. Sea land.

There were lots of sea land. There were lots of places. Sorry, I've misread there. There were lots of sea land. Doctor Damon, very busy there. Doctor Damon. Fritz of the sea. Doctor Damon.

That was their website. That was a lot of fun. That was a lot of fun. Fonulist, as that was an episode about the, what do you call it? Micro Nation of Sea land. Sea land. A very popular episode and I don't know if I announced it publicly on the podcast We are posted on social media. I did finally come through and I have made Matt and Jess Lord and lady. Yeah, yeah, Lord native sea land. Thank you so much. Yes. So those certificates. I mean

Perkins of sea lands sort of made above your bed maybe yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes So, Lind and Barnum parted company on the 9th of June, 1851. It was amicable, and they remained on good terms afterwards, but Lind had weirdo of Barnum's assertive marketing of her. She's like, this guy promotes too hard. I feel like he would be a bit much. Oh, 100% yeah. He'd be a lot. I'm even the give Hugh Jackman, I'm like, here, I'm a bit much.

Like someone, he's taking seven phone calls at once, can't I? He seems like a small dose is kind of guy. Yeah, yeah. You know, he's fun. Super lovely, like mate, but then if you have to have a meal with him, it's like, fuck me. Oh, you're a lot. You're a lot.

Yeah. Here, I'm good in age, you know, just part down. Yeah, sorry to you. Unless you listen to podcasts, um, I'm listening to this right now, or a friend of yours is listening, and as poor did you do do it just being a bit funny there and I love you.

You're a national treasure. Let's have dinner. Let's do dinner. We'll cook. We'll cook. We'll cook. You bring a bottle of something else. Yes, that's all we ask.

I'll bring a puzzle. Dave will bring you love puzzles here. We do love puzzles and Cassie OK, boss. Matt, what's your specialty in the kitchen? Uh, uh, drawing. Matt, what's your specialty in the kitchen? Uh... Uh... Drawing. Okay.

You wash, Eldra. Okay. You wash, Eldra. That's not a pun. I think that is, I'm sad. But I'll climb that one. I'm Arthur, hand it again. We have huge act, but I hope we can make him do that.

Well actually, yeah, fuck, he's a person. Yeah He's a fucking royalty he we tap dancing away He'd sing while he does dishes I You know, yeah, and I tried to sing along and go oh no, I'm very bad and we're doing it We're like we'll do the we're probably time to start clean up He's like I'll help and then he's singing a dance like anyway. You're a tea or coffee Nightcap yeah, no, do you want to tea or coffee? Yeah. Nightcap. No, I'll grab another beer. All right, cool.

Cool, cool. Come here. Come here. Right with the house lights on. Ooh! It's done. It's got the y'all's. It is a big day, isn't it?

I've got another big one tomorrow. Oh my god, is that the time? You've got a big day too? Oh great, yeah, me too. I'm on set in the morning, but I love to run some lines with you. Tell you a bit about it. Fucking hell, you get out of my house.

Hugh Jackman is still here. Yeah, I have my house. Hugh, it has been so good. Yeah, thanks so much for having me. I'm having a great time. Yeah, what should we chat about next? Oh my God, Hugh, you are stretching. Yeah, you are stressed, like leave.

You know what we should talk about? Our favorite modes of exiting my fucking house. Oh, is that a board games cupboard? No, no, you were housed in there, just housed. Oh, a fold them. Oh, we can make a pillow for it. Out of these towels and pillows, yeah. They're pre-folded, huge.

They're all good to you. They claim I've put them away for a reason. That's why they're in the cupboard. I've actually got a great app. It's a trivia app. We could play off of my phone. Oh, oh. Hey, have you seen that YouTube video

where the kid falls over? It's really funny. I've already spoiled it, but I'll play it for you anyway. Do you have Chromecast? What's going on to you? What's my phone? What's my phone? Yeah, my phone's down at the moment.

Yeah, and I can't see YouTube. Actually, I'm YouTube blind, so. Re-condition. I can't see you. Just fucking leave you! All right. That's how it happened. Matt and I just... Are we doing a scene? I'm not. Fuckin' leave you! All right! That's how it happened. Matt Knight.

Are we doing a scene? I feel you're not a Dave. Just, Dave would snap. Because you wouldn't think it'd be here. No. All right! Turn eyes! Jesus!

I never had this problem with Russell Crowe. He knew I'd have fuck off. Ha! Ah, yes. Okay, so she's like, this has been a bit much. I'm gonna, she continued touring America, but just solilo. She's like, I'll handle it. I'll take it from you.

So she gave 93 concerts in America for Barnum, earning her about $350,000, while Barnum needed at least a half a million equivalent to 15 million now. Fucking hell. He made a lot of money. Well, since she obviously gave a lot to charity. Yeah, yep. So he really liked this gamble

that's paid off big time. Yes. Because he even mortgage the mansion. Yeah. You know, it doesn't get much bigger for a gamble than that. Yeah. Morgan the man.

Morgan the man. So, do you do, are you so casual with it that you have a phrase? Just got to mortgage the mansion. Yeah, I got to mortgage the man. Yeah, I'd have mocked the man. Ha ha ha problem was you let me buy a man. I know, you fool. I kind of bought a man. Oh no, you sh- Now I've got a Morgan.

With a 0.05%. Do you know what happened to the minister? Did he get his cash back? Did it, was he- Ah, I was going to see you say. Was it an investment from him? Was he making profits? Surely.

Oh, I don't know. I don't know. It could have been a donation. Surely that would be fucked. That would be annoying if you donate to help, because you're like, all right, I'll help you out. Sounds good. And then you say they're making millions of dollars.

Wanna pay me back? Yeah. I'd want that with some interest. Bit like those companies that received job paper in Australia and have somehow made hundreds of millions of dollars in time. Yeah. Anyway, good fun.

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Now is the time, mycomputercareer.edu. So okay, back from this gigantic tour, what do you do next? Well, he wanted to change public attitudes about the theatre, which was widely seen as the den of evil. Oh, oh. That's gonna be another way, Rela, he had have been dead against theater. Like, you might like theater, but I'm gonna ruin that.

I'm gonna shit in every seat, and then you're gonna go in and go, wow. This smells bad, and I sat in some shit. I never going back to the theater. Luckily, it was a great show. Normally, that'd be a deal breaker for me, but not in this case.

So does he do it and does he become the Shakespeare of the theatre? Is that the nickname of the game? Yes. The Bar of the Boards. It's almost something. That's almost something. He wanted to change the perception of theaters

to be respectable middle class entertainment. The den of evil. He built New York City's largest and most modern theater, naming it the moral lecture room. Okay. He hopes that this would avoid CD connotations and attract a family crowd. Right, before it was called the sex pit.

Yeah, and he was like, hmm. I think that we could rebrand here. Let's call it God is here. God is in the house. God is in the house, it's nice in here. Is it, so is this on Broadway? I don't know. That sort of sounds like maybe this is early Broadway

or something, not that I understand how old Broadway is or anything, but you said New York. Is that where Broadway is? Yes, it is. Hmm. Hmm. So what's Broadway is? Yes, it is So I want to look it up moral I'll save the moral lecture and is till running today Probably got cast So he started this is weird he started the nation's first theatrical matinee's to encourage families and lessen the fear of crime.

Okay. Come to his show in the middle of the day. How are you going to get robbed in the middle of the day? No one's ever been robbed in the middle of the day. No one, not one. So he opened with the drunken, a thinly disguised temperance lecture, as he himself would become anti-alcohol since returning from Europe. He followed that with melodramas, fasses, and historical plays put on by highly regarded

actors, so he's getting good people in too. Okay. So moral lecture, theatre, anything? Nothing. Nothing's coming up here. Interesting. Interesting. Oh, okay.

Oh, okay. No, okay. Oh, I thought that you were about to say something. You haven't done it. No. No, okay. Oh, I thought that you were about to say something happened to it. No. No, okay. But like, oh, that might not exist anymore because dramatic fire.

That was a sinkhole. There's no earth there anymore. Turns out he imagined it. And that is now Central Park. Yeah. Thank you, PT Barler for Central Park. From Wiki as well, it says, he organized flower shows, beauty contests, dog shows,

and poultry contests. But the most popular were baby contests, such as the fattest baby, or the handsomeist twin. The handsomeist twin. How fucked is that? Why are you giving me a kid a conflict? Is that a competition of two? Against the twin.

Of the two, you are the handsomeest twin. Not you, ugly. I was pointing at them. What? What? What? That's weird. It said has a 50-50 shot.

I'm taking out of the process. And whoever loses gets adopted. Oh, wow, that is a high stake. By PT Barnum, it's gonna put you in a cage. Yep. The fat is baby's hands dangerous, so it doesn't it? Yeah, because people are still fat. Not their baby, yeah, that's not healthy.

Just feed the baby, you know. Yeah, if they naturally got a bit of baby fat, that's okay. Oh, the best. Not a big fan of baby competitions at all. Really? Let's keep the babies out of the competitions. What about the bonds baby search? Thank you. Well, that's one that comes to mind. They've also doing dogs now.

The dogs baby search. Bons, yeah. I mean the dogs are now sponsoring their own baby search. These hungry dogs. We're dog. That's right. We can only bet dogs could talk. Dingo. I like Dingo's sponsoring. Sorry. And what do you reckon Humphrey's voice sounds like? Hello. And the first thing he says too is I wanna eat that. I like to eat a baby.

I feel like I'm turning that voice off now. Sorry, sorry. It's hard to think about QD. If that's what he's saying. Humphrey is Dave's dog. Oh yeah, not my baby. Hello, I'd like to eat another baby. So.

My twin, my ugly twin. So, but so, Bont have a dog search now. Yeah. Wow, there you go. Okay. Oh Dave's, why don't make a note in your phone. He's Googling it. I am not Googling it.

Dave, we don't have Tom Fee to sign up his own shirt. No right now, we can do it after this. I've already bothered you both to like it. I'm not going to treat. He also decided to get back into the publishing game starting the pictorial weekly newspaper Illustrated News. God, that's a shocking title. Yeah, it's real bad. There's another bad title coming up illustrated news. That's bad. Ricken No, the whole thing the pictorial and illustrated all that is that a description or the name of it description Oh, sorry. I thought that was all no, it's just called illustrated news Okay, I thought it was what was what was this in the described it pictorial weekly newspaper illustrator That does kind of sound like how I used to nice thing

Honestly, yeah, the amtabulous Yeah, great buzzword buzz buzzword, buzzword product. This one is just illustrated news. Okay. I do feel like that. That's pretty good. And he published an autobiography the following year, which sold more than a million copies.

It was creatively titled, Life of PT Barnum. Wow. I like that. That is flat shoe. Fabulous construction. Watershoreman. He really knows how to sex something out. Yeah, he knows it's a king of marketing.

So, but a million copies, that's huge. Massive. I've just seen a photo of him. He would be stoked that he's quite a champion. He's not, he's quite a champion. Oh, look, you know, not his value. His value is how he comes up with titles. Comes up with titles and he.

Oh dear. He. But also, we've talked about this before. It's pretty pippa-poly. It's so hard to have any concept of, because people talked about him as being he's a fairly charismatic, I think. He's a tight-ass, but had bright, blue eyes, a little bit balding, a little bit of a pop belly,

but, you know, he's quite tall, he's like six to... He's got a strong look. I'm not saying, I'm just saying, he's no Hugh Jackman. But who is? By modern, but Stan. Who is? Ryan Gosling.

Okay. Ryan Gosling, the modern Hugh Jackman. Hugh Jackman. Canadian Hugh Jackman. In the mid 1850s, financial strife struck Barnum. Well, that was fun to say. He had an investment, he'd invested a great deal of money in the Jerome Clock Company to help him develop

the East Bridgeport and Connecticut area. But the company went bankrupt in 1856, taking his fortune with them. Shek, his fortune was huge. Yeah, well, he's lost a lot. He's not a quitter while he's a head kind of guy. Or not like a, I've made so much money. I want to put a chunk of it away as little buffer. Yeah, he's all in every time.

No buffer. So this started four years of litigation and public humiliation. Some people pity them, some celebrated his misfortune because he's like, he's not universally adored. So you don't devise? Yeah. Devise it even back then. Yeah. But as of him back then.

Yeah. But as I mentioned earlier, Charles Stratton or General Tom Thumb, his character name, stepped in and the two of them went on another European tour to make some cash. You know what I reckon would have been real divisive about him? How he just sort of broken a song all the time. Yeah. Fuck that would be annoying. I'm out of money.

Yeah. Oh, there he goes. Here he bloody goes. I'm out of money. Yeah. There he goes. Here he bloody goes. Feeling blue. Oh no. Oh please, I will honestly pay you to stop saying. And that is how he built his fortune back. Every street gone, he starts singing people on.

Shut up! Shut up, PT! And that's who does it. He also started a lecture tour, mostly as a temperant speaker, like abstaining from alcohol. Oh, right. By 1860. Sounds like a lot of fun. What a fun guy. Yeah, fun dude. By 1860, he emerged from debt and built a mansion, which he called Lyndon Croft. And he resumed ownership of his museum. So he just bailed himself out within

a few years. So he's fine. Back on his feet. Yes. These kind of guys, like a normal person goes bankrupt and goes, fuck, I shouldn't be so reckless. I'm just gonna, I had a shot, I didn't make it. But then the guys who end up, you know, all the super rich people, they've gone bankrupt

a million times. And they come back and go, well, I came back. Yeah, and they, I could do it again. Yeah. And yeah, it's sort of like he just, he doesn't quit and he just keeps going. He's got this tenacity for doing what he does. But, you know, if you'd forgotten some of the fucked stuff

he did and were happy that he got himself out of financial ruin, well, strap in because he does some more fucked stuff. Okay. So in 1860, Barnum introduced Man Monkey, whose real name was William Henry Johnson. He was an African-American little person with microscethally, a medical condition involving a shorter than normal head. Man Monkey spoke a mysterious language, up by Barnum and was used as an exhibit in Barnum's shows. So there's a linguist now? Yeah he's making up languages

for this man monkey. Oh my god. No it's so fucking gross. And then this is what kind of interesting, he went on to create America's first aquarium and to expand the wax figure department of his museum. That part's less interesting. First aquarium though. Yeah. That's kind of interesting. In the world.

American. Wow. Okay. It's a bit interesting isn't it? So that beat Melbourne's aquarium. Let's see life aquarium. Let's see life aquarium. Well he was that built.

Oh shit. They might have just picked them. It was just picked them. Well, he was that built. Oh, they might have just Pept him. He may have just piped him. Yeah. Wow. I know. I always sort of maybe that was the first in the Southern hemisphere. Yeah. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah. Someone the other day described Melbourne Comedy Festival as the biggest in the Southern Hemisphere. I'm like, I love that. I love claiming because it's actually the third biggest in the world so which is way more impressive. That sounds huge isn't it? But I love frame. No it's bigger than the Cape Town comedy festival. Yeah. Holy shit. I know. And if actually I would argue that anybody of water isn't aquarium. Oh wow. Yes. If and your eyes are windows. Whoa. So you could look at fish through windows anytime you want. Just stick your head in a bucket.

Your eyes are a glass bottom boat. If there's a fish in the bucket, stick your head in there. If you're upside down in the water, your body's a boat and your eyes are a glass bottom. Oh my god. Think about it. Wow. If you've got a glass tush,

which I know. You've already got a glass bottom. So yeah, kind of cool. America's first aquarium, but let's exploit some more people. In 1862 he discovered giant s, Anna Swan, a Canadian woman who was seven foot 11. Wow. That is very tall. And Commodore Nutt, that's a good name, isn't it? Another little person to replace his original Tom Thumb. So he's just kind of, I don't know, it feels so weird to exploit people

for the things that make them different. Yeah. Yeah, just make, yeah, that's right. I mean, that's literally what he's doing. Right, he's making money out of people. Yeah, for just being who they are. But, I mean, you said the film sort of sold that as... He was accepting of them all and they didn't have places they could be.

So, he was giving them... Because it was a different time. Yeah. But I make, like, I don't know. Maybe there was a little bit of that, but it also still feels gross, doesn't it? Jess, I really need you to give us a definitive answer here. Unfortunately, my time machine is in the shop. I did not get to go back and interview them as I normally would, of course.

That's why this podcast has such expensive overheads. You did chat to me, though. I chatted to you. What did you say? Oh my god, what didn't you say? Oh my god, what did you say? Oh my god, fucking house. And I was also like, why are we at my house? You know, you're a huge fucking Jackman.

Yeah, can I go? Even if you don't live in this city, if you're like, stay, if you're here, you're staying in a penthouse somewhere. Why are we at my shitty apartment? No, the problem is you have to morg the merch. Morg the merch. He's more he's mooging his own merch. Yeah, that's tragic. It is. It's pretty bleak for you. Yeah. Yeah.

I tell you what, it was pretty bleak when the old undertakered to mow the morg. Mocking this morg. Is that anything? I'll add it out. I will not. I'll add it out. Oh my god. I was just looking up Hugh Jackman to see what he's up to now and it says people. Where is he now? Look at the live camera. But it says people also ask, number one is what is Hugh Jackman worth. The second one is, is Hugh Jackman a nice guy? Oh, what's the answer? What's the top answer?

With over a decade and a half of experience, Jackman is acquired the label of nicest guy in Hollywood. He's not today. This is the old story. A decade and a half experience of being a was acquired the label of nicest guy in Hollywood. He's not today. This is the old story. A decade and a half experience of being a nice guy. Yeah, what was that? Who is Hugh Jack was best friend? Who was it?

It's one of us. It's one of us three. Oh, hang on. What? It's in that guy that goes to cricket. Things. He was shitting all over Gus at the dinner party we had. Oh my god, he couldn't say a nice thing about it.

I'd change the subject. A lot of vitriol. Yeah. It's awkward. Do you even mention Magneto? Stop talking about Hugh Jackman. He doesn't need our free publicity. No.

He's making a motser off this right now. Which he needs because he had to mock the man. Munch, I'm the merch. And the rest. Yeah, he's like, just take it all. During the Civil War, his museum drew large audiences seeking diversion from the conflict. He added pro-Unionist exhibits, lectures and dramas, and he hired Pauline Cushman in 1864. I got the Cushman in 1864.

I got the Cush, right? Get. Who had served as a spy for the Union to lecture about her thrilling adventures behind Confederate lines. Oh, that union. Right. I was wondering if it was the CFMU. So hang on, so he's pro-union, but he is essentially enslaving people.

Yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah. So he was like a yeah. Yeah. I don't know. Yep. I suppose he's the kind of guy that's like which one will make me more money. I'll be honest. Probably. Barnum's unionist sympathies were obviously not appreciated by Confederate sympathizers. Barnum's American Museum burned to the ground on July 13, 1865 from a fire of an unknown origin. I'll do you. Barnum reestablished it in another location in New York City,

but this was also destroyed by fire in March 1868. So first one burnt down in July, he somehow moves it, reestablishes it within six months, and then it burns down again. That's better last week. That's the next year. Sad is unlucky. Although having a run.

I was not the next year, sorry, it was three years later, my bad, I read that wrong. Watching those wax figures slowly melt. No, the George Washington figures just melting in the world. No, no, no. No, no, no. Ross, everyone's third favorite character! Ross is not my third. You want to put...

Top three? Ross. Top three. We probably talked about this on the first episode. We have talked about this on the first episode. I have talked about how I think Ross is probably my favorite episode. Ah, right. I think Rachel's actually underappreciated.

She gets funnier. Yeah, right. Anyway. I like Guntha, is probably what I would have said last time. Apparently. What a funny person to say. He's in the coffee guy. He's a coffee guy.

So yeah, he is the coffee guy. So I know, yeah, I've watched it a few episodes. Yeah. He's a coffee guy. He tells the coffee. Anyway, so yeah, it's burnt down to few episodes. Yeah. He's a gov-go. He says a gov-go. Anyway, so yeah, it's burnt down to strobe my fire again in March of 1868.

The loss was too great the second time and Barnum retired from the museum business. He's done. Oh wow. It would be, you'd start to go, it is going to burn it down. I'll probably cut my losses. But that's what they want, unless he was one of those,

that's what they want me to do. Yeah, and also he doesn't seem to cut losses really well. I'm just gonna make it less flammable next time. Hmm, hmm, gonna make it all out of asbestos. That'll show him. Nothing can go wrong from here. I'm gonna hand cut all the pieces. So by this time it's 1868,

he's in his late 50s, surely just a quiet retirement. Sure, he'll die next week. He does seem like a real quiet retirement guy. No. At the age of 60, he entered the circus biz. Oh yeah, right, I forgot that that's what he's famous for. I was thinking that maybe the sort of the museum in setup was Circus, Circus, Circus- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And I was like, oh, he's already done that, but he hasn't done that bit yet, right? So he established PTA Barnum's Grand Traveling Museum, Managerie Caravan, and Hippodrome. Oh, that's with Hippos. Oh, what a Hippodrome is actually. Did anyone know that it's? It's got to be Hippo, I think. He's seen that video of the Hippo jumping out of the water after running. Fuh.

Yeah, Hugh Jackman showed me it four times. Okay, it says the hippo name was an ancient Greek stadium for horse racing and chariot racing. Why cool, it's a horse-o-drome. Come on, Rome! Horse-o-drome! Oh, there's Greek, so you said Greek. Fuck. Same, did.

Oh, that was great. So you said great fuck. Same, dude. Across the next decade, it changed names many, many times and none of them catchy. P.T. Barnum's traveling world's fair, great Roman hippodrome and greatest show on earth. What? Oh, they were three titles or one, but... That's one. No, no. Why are there ends in there? That's the biggest thing on a poster you ever see. And P.T. Barnand's greatest show on earth

and the greatest London circus to say, Sanchez Royal British Managerie and the Grand International Allied shows united. Surely the greatest show on earth is enough. That's enough. Then you're going to like, the next one is the greatest something in London. It's like, well, you've already done the greatest

in the world. Yeah, why are you downgrading? We all assume there's a managerie in the greatest show on earth. Yeah. And the other thing. And a hippodrome. Hippodrome, all the great shows of a hippodrome. All the great shows of a hippodrome.

Hippodrome. So in amongst this time, Barnum's wife Charity passed away in November 1873. They'd been married for 44 years. The following year, he remarried. His new wife was the daughter of one of his friends, John Fish. Nancy Fish was 40 years younger than her new husband. And a real fish. With the body of a monkey. Now he loved her. And still the show must go on and the money must be made.

In 1881 his circus merged with James Bailey and James Hutchison, soon shortened to Barnum and Bailey. The show's first... Hutchison really got the... I know. Such a short straw there. Barnum Bailey and Hutchison, sorry mate. We're going for a little ration here. Yeah.

We're trying to keep it snappy. Some of the feedback we've had is the titles are a bit confused. They're a bit long, sorry. Because of that, we're giving you no money. Thank you. The show's first primary attraction was jumbo, an African elephant that Barnum purchased in 1882 from the London Zoo.

The Barnum and Bailey circus still contained acts similar to his traveling menagerie, including acrobats, freak shows, and general tom thumb. Barnum persisted in growing the circus in spite of more fires, trained disasters and other setbacks. And he was aided by circus professionals who ran the daily operations.

He and Bailey split up in 1885 and they came back together in 88 with the Barnum and Bailey greatest show on Earth. Yes, stick to that! Yeah, we're getting close here. But have you stopped there or is there more? Yeah, that is it. There's more.

Later, Barnum and Bailey circus toured the world. So they're keeping it a bit snappier now. If you think he's late, he's in the 70s now, isn't he? Yeah. He's late 70s. Barnum and Bailey merged with Ringling Bros in 1919 and the company only went to funk a few years ago in 2017. So it ran that entire time.

Obviously in a few different forms, but the world has gone past circus, right? Apart from the whitey said, do so late, which means circus of the sun. I don't know if that's true. Certainly. Cirque of the sole. Yeah. Thank you. I sure I sure I saw the show, Ozo, about an egg. Oh, wow. It was a big egg. They're really specific. They've got one about everything, the Beatles egg.

I hate eggs too. Why did you get that? I gave you that. I did a bunch of good stuff. Cheap tickets to my then workplace. Right, egg. Egg. It was great.

I was meant to go last year for the first ever time. Take it for Christmas from a sister. What happened? Canceled. Why? They canceled. Yeah. Frosted right. I was meant to go last year for the first ever time. Ah, what happened? Take your Christmas from a sister? What happened? Canceled. Why? They canceled. Yeah, frustrating.

Very flaky. Why? Some sort of world event, I'm not sure, or some interrupt at them. Whatever, liars, which can be fucked. Ha ha ha. So he's done publishing. He's written a book.

He's two of the world and publicized a singer. He's guessed how much a house costs. How many rooms they have. He's done that. Museums, circuses, whatever. Now, obviously, next step, politics. Of course. But I'm claim that politics were always distasteful to me. Yet he was elected to the Connecticut legislation,

legislature in 1865 as... That's a connecticut. As Republican representative for Fairfield and served four terms that politics... How long are the terms? This is in the into his 70s. Yeah. He ran for Congress. Four years. So he's in there till pushing towards Naani. Well, yeah, he ran for Congress in

1867. Also, he's jumped back slightly. Yeah, that's your tomorrow. He's not 100 years old. He's trying to wreck his own record. He's in the circus. This is the world's oldest politician. How weird is this though? He ran for Congress and lost to his own record, he's in his circus, is the world's oldest politician. Yeah. How weird is this though? He ran for Congress and lost to his third cousin, William Henry Barnum. Oh. How funny is that? I suppose, I mean, I've got a lot of cousins.

I'm sure one of them would pit me to the post for Congress, Pricks. A third cousin's the kind of ones that you have like hundreds of. Probably. And I think they're the ones you can fuck. Oh my God. Jess, why have you looked into that? I haven't.

That's why I said I think. Wading on an email, but. But. Maybe my cousin Barry, you're wading on an email. Think it's crossed emoji. Sometimes I speak and I'm like, shut up. Shut up, Jess. No, this podcast would be way worse. Never shut up. In 1875 he worked as a mayor of Bridgeport, Connecticut, the... Like a female horse. In the overdrive. This was a town that he was like trying to invest all to money and sort of building up and

developing this town. He was the mayor of it for a while. Can you say it just for the American side, how they say it? And for my benefit. Mayor. Mr. Mayor. I do declare Mr. Mayor. Okay, American.

They say most words better than us.er. Okay, American. They say most words better than us. Maya, I love that. Water, that sucks. Water. We both say with the D then. Water. Yeah, we say water.

And what do they say? Water. It's a more subtle difference, I want. That's not even the you Ellen DeGeneres in depression. You're doing the other words than that for me? No. Boss bottle. Sorry to anywhere because we got very confused at the channel of change.

Oh my goodness. The local radio. Is that Ellen? No. You're saying Alan or Ellen. I'm not Ellen. Ellen. Who?

Is that Ellen DeGeneres? Is that the man? Alan! Alan! Is that Alan DeGeneres? Is that the moment that Alan? But anyway, all questionable things must come to an end. Oh, don't say it. So he hasn't lived. He hasn't lived.

He could be about 160 right now. He's got so much more to give. So many more careers to fortune failure. Sadly, Dave, I'm so sorry to tell you. Your hero, PT Bard. No, not Phineas. Whatever the T-Stan for. Taylor.

T-Stan, Taylor. Died from a stroke in 1891 at the age of 80. Oh, fucking packed a lot into life. The same age as his initial. Yes, a choice. Slave performance. That's right. And just an interesting little fun fact.

Oh, that's a fun, probably a bit grim. He's buried, Matt, you decide. He's buried in Mountain Grove Cemetery in Bridgeport, Connecticut, a cemetery that he designed. No, that's a fun for all. That's a nice idea. Well, you know, it's fun, it's not grim. All right, great.

Do you think people at the time when it was been called in Peite for his initials? Peite. Peite. Peite. No, I think they're called in Peite, Barnum. Oh, but you're saying, Mr. Alex, and I think in America, they say Peite, Barnum. Peite, Barnum.

Peite, Barnum, I do declare Mr. May. It's the May. The May, I pay tie. And that is the story of maybe not the greatest showman. I feel like the greatest, well not even the greatest piece of shit, but just a piece of shit. Yeah, it's a very good on him. It's so hard to look at these things,

because it's so long ago as well. It's not even like it was 20 years ago. It was a different time. This is a hundred, like it's so long ago. Nice, cancelled. Yeah, fucking. Really? I don't think Hugh Reddy's Wikipedia page

before he gets to the character. What are you thinking, Hugh? Let's have a chat to him next time. Honestly, it was a different time, but you know, there's things can be, you know, they can be, they can be complicated. You know, it's not black and white. There's areas of gray in between. Yeah.

He was a piece of shit. Yeah. Who had some success in business. That's right. You know, he can be both of those things. Yes. And he wants to, he wants to be everything this guy. Yeah.

That was a fascinating report, Jess. I knew nothing about the guy. I Jess. I knew nothing about that. I got it. I knew nothing of that. Sorry. I'll do the glory. Thank you. I had no idea what you were talking about.

Yeah. What are you? What's he saying over there? So thank you very much for bringing that to my attention. Well, thank you to all the people that suggested it. I had to do a little bit of digging around in the hat to find all the suggestions. Some people had sort of said the greatest showmen, other people had talked about the circus more specifically. So if I missed you, I'm sorry I tried to find everybody who suggested that, you know,

broad topic. But yeah, it's a bit of an interesting one. The film is, I would say it's fine. If you're in the mood for just something kind of easy to watch, like I said, hang over Sunday. Get the songs. Unless that's what you're into. something kind of easy to watch, like I said, hang over Sunday, get the songs. Unless that's what you're into. It's not that pretty good. People quite like songs.

Not everyone hates it when they go, ba-ba-da-da. Like, oh, I'm happy. You hear the strings sort of floating in, you're like, fuck, and here we go. Yeah, maybe we should say we probably don't say it all that often. The way to suggest a topic is there our website do go on pod.com, there's a button you can push submit a topic.

Anyone can submit a topic, you don't have to be a Patreon supporter or anything like that. Anyone can suggest a topic and if your topic comes out, you will get thanked unless you just come find your name. Well, that's really more on you than on me. You've probably written it a weird way. Findable. Yep. But yeah, that was fascinating. New nothing of him.

All I'd never heard of him before that movie came out. But yeah, it was obviously quite a big deal in his time and in his country. I mean, he made so much money off other people's talent. Yeah. He's a good marketing or yet, a total gamble with Jenny Lindt, but paid off for both of them, so. During his life, Jess or Dave, what did America go through in his life from 1810 to 1891?

What kind of things were happening over there? Well, the Civil War, we talked about. The Civil War was in that time, right? Yeah. So it was a pretty hectic time, I mean, this through. Yeah, it's just, it's interesting to get the other side of that, because we often will talk about like, so called conflicts or stuff of that sometimes, but then to be like, and this is what they were doing for fun, you know, and their spare time, they go watch a singer they've not heard of

and fight for tickets. Oh, and watch her arrive on the docks. Yeah, that is interesting. Well, Jess, I do declare that that brings us to everyone's favorite section of the episode, the Fact Quotal Question section. And the way you can get involved in this is, or I should say first, there's a little jingle, I believe. Facts quote or question. And the way to get involved in this, the reason it's everyone's favorite section is because

listeners or patron supporters give us a fact, a quote or a question. And they're always great fun. And the way to get involved in this is to go to patreon.com, such do go on pot or do go on pod.com and support us at the Sydney Sharnberg level, Dr. Memorial Package Rest in Peace. She's already graded the same at longer at the start. Now I do it every time. I'm going back, I'm just shortening it again. The Sydney Sharnberg level and rest in peace.

Rest in peace, Memorial Edition. So yeah, you can get involved there. There's heaps of different rewards if you want a supporter to get There's three bonus episodes per month on one level and above you get to vote for topics like just as topic today Was voted by this level you can also get another Facebook group which people often call the kindest and most positive corner of the internet There's a weekly newsletter that just puts together all sorts of different things. But anyway, for this particular thing you have to give us a fact to quote or a question. First up we've got Sophie Schuter.

Now she's corrected me on the pronunciation now Dave's giving me the thumb. Oh, and that's right. Great. So thumb up I should say. Thumbs. It's giving me the thumb. It's giving me the thumb. Oh, that the way.

That side thumb, which way's it gonna go? Ooh. Ooh. Sophie Shooter, who's the, given herself a title of head of administration, Swap's division. Oh, of course. That's course. There's another fun thing that a bunch of our supporters do

with Sophie's guidance. She's organized two different swaps. From listeners from all around the world. One of them was a book swap, and one of them was a snack swap. Pretty cool stuff. It was great seeing all the photos of what everyone sent each other. I think that's why it's just a nice place where they're often doing fun things. We pop in and out, but mainly it's just supporters chatting to each other and whatnot and it's very nice. So Sophie has given us a fact and I don't read this,

I'll read them out. So here we go, this one's a fact from Sophie. On the day this gets read out, I'm going to launch the next swap on the Patreon Facebook page. Oh, you had it here first. So I'm just using my powers here to tell everyone, sign up to the key ring swap, going live soon. Ah, key ring swap. The obvious next step. I love a key ring. Done books, done snacks.

Key rings. Obviously. I think it's a good idea. That's fun. Great work. So if you want to be involved in that, sign up to the Patreon at any level, any level you get in there.

And then once you sign up, you get a message with instructions about how to join the Facebook group. And then I've got to go in and manually let you in. But just put your email just in there and then I'll cross check it and do that, which is great fun. I love admin. So yeah, get involved in that. Sophie Shooter, what a legend.

Say hi to her and look out for her post if you want to get involved in that. I love that she's also confident that she's going to be listening on the day. Like she must only listen on the day of that they come out. Or she's true. I hope it hasn't caused her any stress. She just keeps the report now. Let's go to this bit. Nope, it hasn't caused any stress. She's kept the report now.

It's starting to this bit. No, no, you're right. Thank you so, Fierce. That's a great idea. Love it. I'm looking forward to seeing photos of people around the world with a key ring from somewhere else. Beautiful.

I reckon the Saints online shop, saints.com.au would be great. It's great. Spot to get some key rings. I'm sure they do some official saints merch key rings. The next one here comes from, do we do key rings? Why am I plugging a different... We should do key rings. We should do key rings.

We've got to get in on the key ring action. Speak business out here. PT would prove. How else do you like keep your keys in one spot? Exactly. The flyin' all over the shop. This next one comes from Carolyn Slater, who's given herself the title of cabin crew responsible

for Inflite service delivery and checking that you were feeling okay. A great and important job. Thank you, Carolyn. Thank you. I would love a couple. Please don't like me to check that video. It's almost like I'm fine. Are you okay?

You're up. Well, I was. I was having a beautiful dream. Yeah, well you are screaming loud Carole and I'll say a question and here's the question my question is for Matt. Oh, that's me. How well are you sleeping? I can remit I can't answer for Matt. Oh, that's me. How well are you sleeping? I can remit. I can't answer for Matt. Oh, how funny. This is how funny after what we just said. I said, my question is for Matt. How well are you sleeping? I can't answer for Matt, but nighttime sleep is a struggle for me. And I'm interested in any good sleep tips just after we're doing that night

mess screen. At the same time, I love to sleep. I love sleep. I love a nap. If I could nap every day, I would. I'm on board with it. Caroline, you sound like me. Yeah, I sleep through the night.

I just wake up tired and I suddenly figured out why it's possibly because I don't breathe properly through my nose That's what one doctor said. I might be getting an operation on that Is this oversharing now, but but basically I um Yeah, I'm sleep. I feel like I'm sleeping okay, but I'm not actually getting good quality sleep So but still looking in a different things and trying to fix some stuff. But any good sleep tips, what I've started doing, I've really been mainly to ask just about this, because you're the king of this, the eye mask. I bought one recently online that's an eye mask

with a like a headphones in it. Ooh. Which is really good. And I did have a wireless one, but then I read that they're not real sure if that's a good idea to have Bluetooth tech on your head for long periods of time, like say eight hours overnight. Sure. So I've stopped using that and I got a plug-in one,

which has been good, but now the mask slips down my face and it, about three nights ago, I woke up gasping for it and the mask was covering my mouth. And like I said, I can't breathe through my nose very well, so. Well, I'll see you again in an audio-opening. Into my cheeks. So, I mean, generally, I think it's a good good idea because it helps just take out the light factor because I don't have great quality blinds,

something I'm looking to, but light comes in, I'll fair bit so, where those, but did you have a tip on a good quality eye mask? No, mine is from Kmart, it makes me look like a unicorn. Oh great. I saw one recently that I wanted to get that was made of silk, I thought that'd be quite soft on the old eyes. I've got a silk one, says Bob on it.

Is it nicer than a cotton silk? I don't use I'm asked that much. I tend to just drug myself. Okay, and is that a good tip? Probably not long-term. No, takes a melatonin. Now, if you're in Australia, you're going to want to order that from overseas. Okay. Anything you get over the counter here is too low a dose. You're going to want 10 milligram. Actually, 10's a little high. You probably want five.

Take one of those healthy skin dyslipidia. What we're saying here, is that legal? What we should say is speak to our medical professional before you order anything medicinal in any way. What does melatonin do? It's a it's a natural thing we create melatonin anyway. Oh right. But if you take it too regularly you can feel a bit blues that you're supposed to balance it out with vitamin D. Oh my god no it's bad. That doesn't sound good. It's not good. Suddenly you shoot up and then yeah it's like one thing leads to another, and you're gonna need a little heron to even out that.

That's what you're gonna need. You're gonna need an upper and a downer. And then you're gonna sleep for 18 hours, and you're gonna wake up feeling pretty average. You wake up in a prison cell. Dave, do you have any tips that people can follow? Are you a good sleeper Dave? I think I would know, actually no,

I wake up choking a lot. And not because of an eye mask. I love to hug a pillow. I cannot talk up hugging pillows enough. Do you have one of those pillows that's got like a fake arm coming off of it? Yeah, never boyfriend pillow. Yeah my girlfriend's like, what are you doing? I'm right here. No, I just have a regular pillow that I hug, and then what I find is in the morning when the light comes in, I just pull it up a bit and it covers the wall. Oh, that's good.

So then I'm hugging, and I'm in the dark. Right. Hugging in the dark. Because I'm so good at it. What a virgin thing to say. I love to hug. I love to hug. I don't know if I'm ready for that,

but maybe we could do a bit of hugging. You don't know. Nothing right? Nothing wrong. Nothing wrong. That's all right. That's great that you felt comfortable saying that, expressing that.

That's really important. I'm not trying to tell people to dope themselves out. That's really important. I do. Yeah, no, I was just, yeah. No, that's true. Don't listen to me. What works for you?

It's just funny that the conversations you do have like with other night shift workers is, that's how it goes. All right, what you're gonna wanna do is, so I was told to do that from a paramedic friend. Oh, okay, well, that feels pretty legit. Yeah, she's like, can I get the good shit in Australia? You want 10 million dollars.

That's when I started feeling a bit nasty. The good shit you're importing, you're like, you can't get it, you definitely can. You probably need a prescription, but it 10 million dollars. That's when it started building a party. The good shit you're importing, you're a good one. You definitely can get it. You definitely can. You probably need a prescription, but it's all right. I think all the tips that I would have are like things that everyone would probably already know, and they're just hard things to stick to.

So for us, I would. Like, don't eat too close to bedtime. Yeah. Go to bed. Like it at the same time. And an earlyish time. Don't try not to have screen time just before those arthing is the clock sticking and we've got to still record a bonus but I try. Don't worry guys, we'll be in bed by 10. My lifestyle means that I can never

do this. But the, but that in lockdown I was getting into a pretty good routine, trying to get to bed at 10, after having not looked at a phone or a screen for an hour before that and leaving my phone outside the room. That's great. And eating, you know, sort of like trying not to eat a couple hours for the last couple hours before bed. Yeah.

And sometimes you just want to snack. Yeah, it's tricky. Just trying to like doing a little bit of exercise, go for a walk or something just to, you know, all those sort of normal health things. But it can be hard to keep up with all the options. Especially when life gets in the way. Pod life, that is. Thanks, Carolyn. Sorry if that, I don't know if that was good answer or not, but I am with you. Love sleep, I just have not figured out how to do it well yet. In all these years I've been alive. You've done it both nights for decades, centuries in your case.

So you give no answers, but then you guys are like, Jess, stop telling them to buy drugs online. Hey, I had an answer, how could I fucking pillow? I had too many answers, they were just boring answers. Yeah, mine was at least interesting. You're the only one that gets results. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Thank you, Carolyn. This one comes from David Loring,

who is the minister of regrets. And David, another man I can relate to. David's offered us a quote, Jess you were saying you love a quote. Love a quote. We rarely get a quote. This quote is, this is not a book to be tossed aside lightly. It should be hurled with great force. It says, most often attributed to Dorothy Parker talking about Atlas shrugged.

Great quote, love that quote. Thank you very much, David Loring. Thank you for providing us with this quote. And finally, from Braden Douglas, this is a fact, you gave, there was nearly no reaction of that quote, Dave, and you're a cool fan. Oh, sorry, yes, Atlas shrugged. Jess said, huh, which is, I just try fully got it.

Quite a divide. It's been, I think it's been a bit self self deprecating. Oh, no, it's not her. No, no, no She's saying Cuz it's quite a shift. She wrote her It's by iron ran and it's a very dear sort of divisive book some right absolutely lover and other people so she's obviously in the The latter camp saying oh, this is not something you should push aside. You should throw it out the fucking window. Yeah, I got you, I got you. It's quite witty.

By, I didn't quite get it. I was not listening, so. I don't know why it's something about me just assumed, obviously being self-deprecating. No one's mean, are they? To someone else's work. Finally, this one comes from Braden Douglas. and Braden is the guy that's been sitting quietly in the corner during every recording session since episode 1.

Holy shit! Slowly looking and a pineapple that no one has acknowledged until now. Bloody hell. There he is, look! The fuck are you doing here, Braden? Give it, can you give him a mic? Braden, I'm afraid it's not. Oh, Braden, you've been doing this for such a long time.

So glad he didn't have a mic before now, because that's, that's Yuck. I'm taking his mic off. Yeah, good call Dave. Oh, Braden. We'll have a chat to you after the podcast, mate. Braden's had Tom in the corner, he's written a longest one here, it's Yuck. I'm taking his mic off. Yeah, good call Dave. Oh, Braden. We'll have a chat to you after the podcast, mate. Braden's had time in the corner. He's written a longest one here.

It's a fact. Let's rip into it. Hey guys, been listening for years and listening to every episode. So I thought you deserved a bit of Dosh. I love it. I love it. Tempted Dosh. That's great.

It's very good. Probably can't stay on this tier forever, but just listen to a World War I part one episode. And while listening to Jess Slag off submarines once again, remember something that I thought might blow all your minds because it's equal parts very clever and utterly ridiculous. I've had a lot of feedback on my opinion on submarines. I just think they're a bit silly. Everyone's very defensive of them.

I love that people are being defensive of submarines. Submarines. To you, someone who definitely is affected by them day to day. Because you might, I mean, you do work for the government. Maybe you're gonna... I do work for the government. Are you... Yeah, that's a USM sort of spy.

You're not in it. Yes. Don't have the defense portfolio, do you? Of course, yeah, yeah. So I think we've spent a lot of money on sub-riding. Yeah, building them over in Adelaide, and by the time they come out, like in 500 years time, we'll no longer... There are absolutely no more seas for them to swim in.

There'll be no more overseas. No more society to protect. We always feel like we're good with that. For my whole life, it's been like, Australia, we spend some big chunk of our yearly budget on defense, like submarines or helicopters or something, and they always suck and take forever to be. Yeah, that was obsolete by the time they come. I don't know why we keep trying.

Obviously we love, we love war. That's why big war trying. Obviously we love war, that's why. Big war country. He goes on. Where was I up to? This thing is equal parts very clever and utterly ridiculous. Bracket, I guess there's a chance Matt could mention this in part two before. Okay, well you, I mean don, I mean, don't write.

I don't read these until you read them. Everywhere you put in here, the brackets was meant that I was meant to read that to myself, right? Before you read this, in which case, change my fact to the quote. Okay, well, it's too late for that, Braden. I'll forge on. Anyway, I thought of the fact when Jess said submarines being able to hide underwater didn't justify their existence When you could just paint normal ships blue to camouflage on the surface. I don't remember you saying that. That's pretty That's a funny. Oh, that sounds like a funny joke, right? I

Think so in World War I a type of naval camouflage was invented called dazzle camouflage. That's fun. Hey Sorry, that's grim. Hahaha. Or sometimes razzle dazzle, which was the name of that scene. Okay, now I'm listening. Rather than painting ship solid grays, whites or navy blues in an attempt

to literally blend in with their background, the idea was to paint crazy geometric patterns in high contrasting colors, all over the ship's to confuse anyone looking at them. Discour a torpedo hit, U-boats, the German subs, had to spot a ship through the periscope, identify the model of the ship from its silhouette, then use its known height to calculate its distance from the U-boat based on the apparent size of the periscope, then determine its speed and heading by seeing how far it moved in a set time. Then it was finally possible to fire a torpedo on an intercepting trajectory. When dazzled,

the idea was that being able to work out which direction a ship was moving or where the top of the mass would be much harder, it was never really proven either way if it worked or not, but more than a thousand ships were dazzled in the later years of the war and the techniques saw limited use even in World War II, World War II. The extra fun bit of this fact means many pods laid in World War I would have looked more like Mardi Gras than the Solmaphere you might naturally imagine. Sorry, this is so long. I only hope you're all feeling razzled and perhaps a little dazzled. I feel like that was as long as my report. I felt razzled and dazzled braiden, thank you very much.

Yes, I actually seen a couple of photos. I have you. And they do look quite sexy. Sexy? Often they're like sort of like a zebra painting. Oh right. They look like they're coming at you from all angles. Yeah, I've seen that before I think.

Cool, there you go. But the question is, are some rain? Oh wow, yeah. But our submarines dumb. Just. They're question is, are submarines dumb? Oh wow, yeah. But are submarines dumb? Just. They're pretty dumb. Yeah, see that? Yeah.

Yeah, they make them look like, sort of like those impossible paintings. I understand. The MCS, sure. Yes. I understand why submarines exist. I just think it's a bit funny. It's like if you think about anything for too long. Like something I always think about is that we evolved from apes and we've made up roads.

And like taxes. We just made all that shit up. When I think about it for too long, I lose my mind a little bit. Think about a sub-rave too long. You think they're silly. Apes never invented taxes today. No. Because they're not silly. They're not silly. This might. We're dumb. Although technically we are apes, so, you know, in a way, we are. That doesn't make any sense.

What? We are apes. We're great apes. No. Try again. It's true. It's not real a lot. Jess, it's true. You're lying again. It's true. Jess, it's true. You're lying again. We're one of the great apes. Great apes. Now it brings us to the time when we think a few of our other great supporters, Justin becomes

a little game to play based on the topic. Oh yes. And I reckon in recent times you've always seemed a little surprised. I was already thinking about like, what food and drinks are going in the trip ditch club. But the game, we played. I was going to think about what I was going to do when I get home.

We named their museum or circus or something. Right, all right. Or what they, who they've exploited. I want you first idea. Yeah. All right, well. So it's, yeah, alright. Can you give us an example after I read out and thank our first supporter here from

Orokei, from Auckland and New Zealand. I'd love to thank Benjamin Blackhall. Blackhall's fantabulous, horse riding extravagans at end paintball. Oh, I love it. I love it. I actually want to go for real. Yeah. I would love to go to a B Blackhalls thing that you just said. This is going to be how to repeat. Yeah, definitely. It's a one time thing.

Yeah, that's right. Just reverse it if you want to hear it again. Rewant the tape. Great work. Benjamin, I'd also love to thank From Valdeez in North Carolina in the United States. I should just quickly say fun fact about North Carolina. They're fire engines of blue. And also From Valdeez in North Carolina, I'd love to thank Ethan Christian. Ethan Christians, House of Mirrors and Clown Workshop. So you can learn to be a clown. B-Y-O, Windex.

Fan college. Love that. Yeah, it's a clown college. It's a clown college the clown college plus whole of mirrors yeah and the oral deity please bring wind I can't let's just set it up yeah it's just this way of getting window cleaners without really going to commit to it all right your audition is to clean these hundred mirrors like mine claim them no no here's here's the window. Please don't mind. Please never mind. It's a rule.

It's not mine, college, is it? Finally, from Barnagat in New Jersey, you know, it's said to have to thank Brittany Roxas. Brittany Roxas, the B Roxas house of cards, made of cards with cards inside and all the things are about cards and they play cards and there's a poker table and some of their areas are also greeting cards. Wow, it really rolls off the card. Just like they used to do. Beautiful.

Good on you, Brittany Roxas. Thank you so much. And there's a business card swap area as well. And, and Brittany is also a bit of a card. Ah, what is she like? Is there a place where you can swap business cards? I'll big time.

Love that. I did say that didn't I? Probably. Yeah, honestly, honestly, I tuned out. I think I might have said that word for word, and there's a place where you swap business cards, which, you know, that hurts, so you were paying for it.

I said it was reading cards. No, no, I came back in for business. Okay, I do apologize. Can I thank some people to move on from this awkward situation? You're, were you apologizing for Dave? Yeah. I'm waiting for him. I also don't doubt. I would love to thank from

another place in the Southern hemisphere Cape Town in South Africa Ryan Hellywell Your reference Cape Town's comedy festival before I did One of the biggest comedy festivals in the Southern hemisphere Ryan Hellywell's big time Comedy La factory and...

HeliPad. HeliPad. HeliPad. Sales. HeliPad. He's a bit of concrete. I do not have a functional one, please don't run. Well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well,

well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well to thank now from VanCuva, British Columbia, Thomas Mitchell. The house of pop tops where once you pop, you never stop. Poppin' and the toppin' and...

Zizi top is here. Zizi top is here as well. In brackets, that bit of brackets. Wednesdays only. Wednesdays only. LAUGHTER Is that bit of the brackets Wednesday's only when so Again, no guarantees it's the real season Poppin and a top and an a zz. Z

Shopping shopper Sorry, did you so we said we've got zz. Z shop here Look at the zz shop. We've got all the zz top merch that you need. The band is here on Wednesdays, brackets sometimes. They haven't got back to us, but we assume. They should, they can. One question, do they have an area where they swap business cards? Did you say that? I would like to think also. From a dash out in Deutschland, Germany, Veronica Brandmehr.

Veronica Brandmehr. What about Brandmehr's good time, health shop slash ice cream parlour, and slash, Slash, rejuvenating center for businesses. If you're having a brand-meh. That's a linga that I use. We're gonna turn it into a brand dream. Hahaha. We also do haircuts. And there is a business card swapping area.

Ah, it's getting to that time and that way we lose our minds. Well, we cannot wait to visit. If I visit Germany every again, I'm going straight to your place. Absolutely, which I cannot name. Was that you, Don Davies, am I turn? Yes, please. Oh my God, yay. I would love to thank from Pittsburgh. On the golden mile. Wow, we love it.

Pennsylvania. I would love to thank Crystal Cobbett. Oh, the Cobbett, obviously Cornworld is the main thing, but what if that's there? Crystal's House of Cornworld. House of Cornworld. As long as she started out, go and small and end up going no big. But unfortunately she had the idea at the pitch

meeting and it's sort of stuck. House of Corn World and Maze Maze. Yes and Water Park. And Water Park. B-Y-O, Bavis. And spider sanctuary. It's weird that I have to mention it but honestly it's been a problem more than thing to do. I know it's a bit of a bad thing to do. I know it's a bit of a bad thing to do. I know it's a bit of a bad thing to do. I know it's a bit of a bad thing to do. I know it's a bit of a bad thing to do. I know it's a bit of a bad thing to do. I know it's a bit of a bad thing to do.

I know it's a bit of a bad thing to do. I know it's a bit of a bad thing to do. I know it's a bit of a bad thing to do. I know it's a bit of a bad thing to do. I know it's a bit of a bad thing to do. I know it's a bit of a bad thing to do. They were my underpants, and they're going to be off right now. Like, when you get up bowling alley and you give them your shoes, and I'll collect my underwear on the way out. I'm just looking absolutely confused. I don't understand, is this the spot? You're standing there nude with your underwear on the counter. you just push it across the table.

Thank you very much. It's like a medium. I need a bit of, I like a bit of room. I'll have a medium underwear, thank you. Swimming underwear please. I want a pair, thank you. Fuck that, yeah. Thanks Crystal Cobbett.

Thank you so much Crystal, so sorry about that. Sorry about that. I would also love to thank from Alexandria in Virginia, Noah Abbey. Noah's cactus, wonder and paureum, okay. Selling all the cactuses you need. Oh, that tapes. And some you don't. All the cactuses you need. Oh, that's heaps and some you don't and all the cactuses come to by two in a mating pair just in case disaster hits We also sell It's Noah's cactus arc

Again, in case we got it we got the cactus arc it In case of in case they carcate got the cactus orchid. In case they carcate, we got the cactus orchid. No, there's something there. There's something there. Let's go on. In brackets, working title. We also sell trailers. Yeah, of course. Obviously.

How else are you going to transport cactus orchids? If you think about it, if the whole Noah's Ark thing was worried that the world was going to be flooded, cactus, they need to live in a cut, cut. Exactly. If you think about it, it's a world like the whole Noah's Ark thing was why the world was going to be flooded. Mm-hmm. Cactus, they need to live in a desert, right? Right? They're going to be the number one plant you can over water, actually. In all your bad animals.

Yeah. They can swim, or sleep. They can swim. Cactus can't. Do they have to? It's with that Noah had sharks on board. Yeah. But did he have two of every cactus?

No, that's wild that they survived. Maybe they've evolved since the flood. Sure. What happened with Noah? He lived for hundreds of years. Really? Yeah, I think he was, maybe he already was, but I think he was super old.

Good on him. Finally. Luckily, P.T. Barnum wasn't around. Hahaha. Finally, I would love to thank from Kenesaw, what's G.A. Georgia. It's the only G. Georgia. Oh, unless it's, is that country or state? Uh-oh, state. Yeah. Kennesaw, Georgia, Eli Brown. I love it. Eli's a great name. Yeah. Eli Brown. It can't help but go to Brown Town.

Of course. But what do they do there? It's a coffee like Arnie Donner saw. Morning Brown. Yeah Eli Brown can't help but go to brown town But what do they do there? It's a coffee like Arnie Donner saw morning Brown. Yeah, morning Brown such pants to spencerie Oh great just in case you have too much morning Brown. Don't worry. We've got vending machines full of pants jeans and Pancake cool We've also got pants case Which are pancakes in the shape of pants. It's very cute. That's girl, I've never done a different pant. Do they shoot straight onto your leg?

Yeah, it's amazing. You sit in a chair and they, you sort of put your legs up in stirrup. And they can't shoot. A chest shot onto you. Shot it. And so, oh, it's a great fit. They're great. Oh, leave it.

Thank you. You really don't want to plug in the wrong size. Size too small. Whoa, oh, yeah, I know you're like, oh, cause they come on at force. You're kidding yourself cause you're feeling a little self-conscious. You don't want to do that.

Yeah, almost 28, I'm a 30. No, no one's judging you. You know, I say, you know, 30. Come on mate, don't lie. But his machine doesn't understand. It just does what it's told. All right, well that's all the names. A great supporter.

I'd like to thank apart from those who've been supporting us for the last three years on the shout out level or above. And they get welcoming into the Triptitch Club. Doesn't have a jingle, but does have quite an elaborate set up. I'll announce your name. I've got you on the door list. I'll lift the velvet rope.

In you come, you'll be welcome by Jess behind the bar. You'll have a tray of beautifully designed drinks, often their originals, and also some all derves, Dave's over with the band who is booked, probably wording him up, telling him the ground rules, whether or not they can perform blue. Something depends, wait by a week. That's right, that guys were wanting to keep it above the belt tonight. Who have you booked for the band this week? We have one of our favorite songs, singing songs for movies, you will know Russell Crowe as they got Toe Fog as well.

They're your foot of grunt. They're going to, yes, it's him and the boys. Rippin' out some classics, they will not be playing anything from Hugh Jackerman movies though. Oh, okay, sorry about that. So, I'm stucked in. And Jess, what kind of drinks and or derbs have you got us this week? The greatest schoo-man everything is served in a schoo-man food and drink. Yes, I love it. Classic sour and chewy.

We have moonshine out of a schoo and for food we have Welsh, Welsh Rebid in a shoe. Oh, lovely. So now what happens is I'll read out the name. I've got you on the list, I'll lift that velvet rope. You'll sort of jog in with your arms up, sort of, if you want to, it's up to you. Absolutely, we'll be doing like a sort of triumphantly. Mexican wave over the top of you.

We've got Toe fog, we'll play you in, of course. And then Dave will hype you up, he's your hot man. So everyone who enters the club feels good about themselves because Dave I've got opinions about how well he does Doesn't matter Welcome in three another trip to And then Jess because they doesn't necessarily do a very good job. Jess does then Big Him up as well So just that every heart man deserves a hype man. Yeah, what do you would you disagree with that? No, I don't disagree with that at all

Thank you, you know like a hype man are always doing the hype and who's hyping them? Thank you Who's happened me the coast girl? Not Matt. I know I've been a big old negative Nellie. No, I think you do great Well, it's just Dave. I don't I know I've been a big ol' negative Nelly. No, I think you do great. Well, it's just Dave, I don't. I don't know. If you could hype up, if you could hype up Jess, Jess could hype me up and I hype.

It's like a great circle. Okay. And then- It's a circle, Jack. Fanta, yes. Well, that is what some have described this show. Especially this section. Pretty good.

All right, well, let me bring them in. First off from Brisbane. You got. It is Rihanna, Jinnavan, Rihanna, Jinnavan. Rhearing, or something like that. What about, they do hype me, remember that? He's at the moment Rihanna is sort of awkwardly walking with his arms in there looking around. She's not a Prince Bain in our side.

It's Jihanna, Rihanna, Jinnabon. Do I get that right? Yeah Rihanna, well I mean did I get it right it's probably the big question. Thank you so much. I think you really need some hype there. If you got anything for him. I was clapped. She's not a Bain biggest question? Thank you so much. I think you really need some hype there. If you got anything for him? I was clapped.

He's not a band in our side. It's all right. I clapped. Just edit out the silence. Well done. Bring yourself to do that. Yeah. Come on, yeah.

Woo! All right, get him in that. We're warming up. RIA, and that's like Rian Johnson, is that right? RIA. That's Ryan Johnson. Oh, fuck. Sorry, Ryan. Ryan Ginnevon.

Oh, can I just say I feel like Ryan. There we go. His name's Ryan Johnson. Yeah. The director. Yeah, Star Wars knives out. Brick Looper. Geez. That's awkward. We've talked so many times. I've always said his name wrong. Introduce him to my mum like that. This is Ryan, Ryan, Ryan. Ryan didn't even say anything. Um, next up from Mossfela Bear in Israel. It's

Bianchi, Stein, Peterson. I couldn't, uh, Mossfela Bear to be without you. You fucking damn it him. Woo! I mean, I wish he didn't pick that bit because that's the bit that I'm least, Be without you. You fucking damn it in. Woo! I mean, I wish you didn't pick that bit because that's the bit that I'm least, I mean, of all of it, the least bit

I'm confident in practicing. You are ruining momentum. Because it's the AA letter that's mushed together. Okay, I want to do it back out. I want to do it back out. I want to do the rest of it the name. Bianchi Stein Peterson. Well, I'm gonna drink a Stein for you tonight. That's great. That's great. That's great stuff. That's son. Well, I'm gonna drink a Stein for you tonight. Great, great.

That's great. That's great. Great. Thank you. Great, back, great, back in up of Dave there. Thank you. Thank you. You had him. Yeah. Thank you.

And finally, I'd love to welcome into the Tribute's Club. Grab a shui. Let's get partying from Greensboro in North Carolina, quick fun fact. They have blue fire trucks there. It's Dean Clark. Oh, the Dean of Fun times here. Yeah, trusty on Dean.

Clokey. We really knocked it out of the park tonight. Wow, he's a good number. Yeah, that's good. Yeah, that's good. That's good. I'm loving it. Yeah, that's good. That feels good. I'm loving it.

Like I'm lying to myself and lying to you, but it feels good. All lying to ourselves, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We're just having a good time. I wake up in the morning and I lie to myself. That's what I do. I wake up and I say, God, you're a good heart, man.

16 hours a day, I'm lying to myself, then I go to bed. I wake up hugging a pillow and I'm like, you are the greatest. Well, that brings us to the end of the episode. Jess, where can people find us? And our house is. Stop it.

Do go on pod across all social medias, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, do go on pod.com, and do go on pod.gmail.com. If you want to, please leave me a number. I really wish we got dot org. Yeah. We should have got dot org. Is it too late? Probably.

And Jess, did you mention that they can find us at ducowonpod.com? Yes. Cool. If you do want to see a Sliven person, please don't come to our houses. But do come to the European beer cafe March 28th, April 4th, April 11th, April 18th, or the super Extravaganza that is Sunday, April 4th, when you've got primates at 2 o'clock, book cheated at 4.15, Matt doing stand up at 6.55,

but also during the entire Melbourne International County Festival, and then 8.30 for Dugo on that night. I've just checked, there are well under 10 tickets now for each show. That's awesome. So, and Dave, if people are seeing the future, is that page is kind of up to date? The show's link on our website.

So if you go to dogonpod.com. You'll be able to see the show. Yeah, click so if you're listening in a year. Hopefully the world's open up and we'll... I know that some people are listening to the future going, Oh my God, he doesn't know about the volcano. They started appearing everywhere. But hopefully we're back out and doing show semi-regulient to the future.

And one more another. Anyway, that brings the end episode, but it's been a bit of a hard day. Thank you so much for listening, and until next week, oh, so thank you and goodbye! Later! Bye! Bye! This episode is brought to you by Progressive.

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