Do Go On - 283 - The Maze Prison Escape (with Nick Mason)

Episode Date: March 24, 2021

In the 1980s, The Maze Prison in Northern Ireland was considered to be the more secure prison in Europe. A prison, within a prison inside an army base, it was considered to be 'escape proof'. Imprisoned members of the IRA saw it as their duty to escape, and in 1983 they put an audacious plan into action. But would they be able to pull it off? Joining us to hear the story is special guest Nick Mason from The Weekly Planet podcast.Get tickets to our live shows this March/April:Matt Stewart - Nostalgia Was Better When I Was A Boy (discount code 'dogoon): https://www.comedyfestival.com.au/2021/shows/nostalgia-was-better-when-i-was-a-boy Matt’s New Interview Show: ‘Matt Your Heroes’: https://youtu.be/VVsVGkzVNZQ Support the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: patreon.com/DoGoOnPod Buy tickets to our streamed shows (there are 12 available to watch now! All with exclusive extra sections): https://sospresents.com/authors/dogoon Check out our AACTA nominated web series: http://bit.ly/DGOWebSeries​ Submit a topic idea directly to the hat: dogoonpod.com/Submit-a-Topic Twitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: [e-mail] Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/Listen to Nick Mason on The Weekly Planet:https://www.planetbroadcasting.com/our-shows/the-weekly-planet/  Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader Thomas REFERENCES AND FURTHER... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Melbourne and Canada, we got exciting news for you. And we should also say this is 2026. Jess, what year is it? 2026. Thank God you're here. Right now, I'm in Melbourne doing my show with Serenji Amarna, 630 each night at the Cooper's Inn Hotel, having so much fun. We'd love to see you there.

Canada, we are visiting you in September this year. If you've somehow missed the news, we are heading up Vancouver, Calgary, Montreal, and Toronto for shows. That's going to be so much fun. Tickets for all this stuff, I believe, are online. And I'm here too. Hey everyone, Dave here, just letting you know that our first live podcast in a million years is this Sunday, 830 at the European Beer Cafe, and we're doing the next three Sundays after that as well. We cannot wait.

We've only got a few tickets. I'm thinking less than five for each show available. At the time of recording, so if you're interested, jump on that now. And you can do that via the link in the description of this episode. We can also find a link to Matt Stewart's brand new stand-up comedy hour of power. I think it's called nostalgia was better when I was a boy. Correct. That's right.

So the Victoria Hotel, and he asked me to tell you that if you use the code, do go on, you can get cheap tickets. So there's three and a half weeks of that show. And finally, we've got to tell you about the biggest day in podcasting history, and that is Sunday, April the 4th, where we are doing not just do go on that night. But beforehand, we're doing a live primates. Matt Stewart will be there. His guests are Evan Runa Merr Smith, Caspage, and a guy I've never heard of. he might be all right. Nick Mason.

Can confirm he's no good. No good, all right. Well, come for the other three because they're great. That's at 2 o'clock. Then straight after that, 4.15, you've got bookcheat, me, the book chook, telling two great guests about a classic book and or play. And those guests are Ben Russell and Michelle Brazier. Then you can go to Matt Stewart's stand-up show at 655,

and then at 8.30, you can come see us do our podcast. I forgot what it was called. I forgot what we were doing right now. Yeah. So you can buy tickets to all of those things and we would absolutely love to see you there. Check out the link in the description for the links. Love you. And welcome to another episode of Do Go On.

My name is Dave Hornikey and as always I'm here with Jess Perkins. Hello, Dave. And not as always, we are here with a very special guest known as the fourth beetle himself. It's Nick Mesao Mason. No, no, guys, it's me, Matt Stewart. I'm at Matt Stewart. We were involved in a Freaky Friday incident. So it's me.

So don't even worry listeners. If you're out there, you're like, don't like Nick Mason. And I know they're out there. I don't believe that they are. Let me ask you a question that only Matt Stewart is. Yeah. Go on. What is your pin code?

St. Kilda? Damn it. Football club. It's true. Yeah, he's good. It's a very, very long code. Yeah. God, going to the ATM with Matt.

He's there for 15 minutes. Put aside half your day, honestly. I put in a lot. I put in all the best and fairest winners. Put in the Norm Smith's medal receiver. It's all in there. All right. It's really mad.

But if you had to boil it down to four, it would of course be 1966. Of course. That's right. So how do you get back into your body if that's something you want to do? We're hoping for a bolt of lightning. Yeah. Like maybe at a urinal. Like we're sharing a urinal.

Yeah. And there's a lightning strike maybe. You're sharing. Yeah. Playing swords? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Nothing but the classics. Wow. Maybe you have to learn a lesson, you know, like in Freaky Friday where she's like, maybe my mom isn't so bad, you know?

Is that the lesson? I haven't seen that for a long time. I can't remember. I think it's my mom isn't so bad, I think. Will they have the urinal? Yes. I think I, Matt Stewart, refused to learn any lessons. I haven't learned any in 282 episodes of this show, so I refuse to learn any of it.

Gosh, he's really good if he's not, Matt Stewart. He's done research. He really is. You know, so the episode number. Bloody hell. I don't even know that. No, you don't. I don't know what.

day it is. What day is it? St. Kilda versus Collingwood. Oh my God. Premier ship. Oh my God. Tism? Well, he's pulling out the catchphrases. Now, do a pun because he loves them. He loves puns. But he also doesn't fully understand them, so I mean, no pressure.

Yeah, so do a pun. And then, well, you could say anything and then to say, is that a pun? More like do a pin. Yes. St. Kilda. Pun code. Guys, I've just been tricking you. It is me.

Oh, my God. Halt tricked you the whole time. I convinced you of this weird supernatural occurrence. But this is almost as if, like, you're a friend of ours and no shit about us. And now I just don't know what to believe anymore. This is crazy. Matt called, Matt messaged me and he said, called me up as if anybody calls anybody these days. He messes me and is like, can you fill in?

I've got a gig to do. And he didn't tell me what the gig was. And it's, like, I've since learned that it's like quite a, like a prestigious, like it's a gig. It's a great gig. Like the Nobel Prize. That's peace ceremony. People are going to listen, they're going to buy tickets or whatever. But he pitched it like he was just going to do five minutes of open mic at the exit.

At a pub, yeah, exactly. I can't come and do the podcast because I've got to do open mic. Try that a new bit. It's a stressful time leading up to comedy festival. You know, we wouldn't hold it against him if he did ditch the podcast for a five-minute spot because every little bit of stage time right before the festival helps, right? But you're right. It is a very good gig that he's doing.

And he was like, oh, I can see if I can get around. And I'm like, no, just go do the gig and have fun. But he did inform me he might be rushing back to do the Patreon. So if you do not like me being here, he will definitely be back. So just hold out, folks. But then part of me also was like, well, if he doesn't come back, then I'll resume the leader of the most pods in a row without a break. Oh.

Because Matt's still got one in front of me after this. Because I've missed two in my time. But that was about five years ago. Wow. Have you missed one? No, I've missed two when I was in Europe one time. And May so you filled in front when it was an Elvis episode? That was Matt again.

Oh, dead. It was Matt. And, yeah, it was two months. I've missed heaps. You guys have really got to just have days off more. You know? I mean, sure, like a couple of them were for funerals of close family members, but whatever. You know?

That wouldn't have stopped Matt or I. Take a day. I know, yeah, you're right. You guys are more dedicated. I've podcasted live from Art Beryl's funeral. Yeah. People telling me to shut up. I said, no, you keep it down.

They can hear you, the priest in the background. Very good acoustics in a coffin. Yeah. Sounds great. Beautiful. Terrific. Yeah. Best sound pretty you can get.

And I chose a topic that Beryl liked. Yeah. As a tribute. Yeah. Murder. Now, Dave, how does this show work? Well, Jess, we take it in terms of report on a topic often suggested by one of our very dear listeners. And that person goes away, does a bit of research on said topic.

Brings it back to the group. Does a little report. And it's my turn to do so. I've done the research. Both of you, neither of you know what the topic's going to be. And we start with a question. My question is, that's a bit of a bit of a shit one, to be honest.

But when I don't know about you guys, when I was a kid I loved doing mazes. You like doing mazes? Like a book of mazes? Yeah. Yes. That was the question. I knew it.

But in the 80s, what was supposedly the hardest maze to escape? Oh, dear. The labyrinth. Is it an emotional maze? There's a lot of emotion in this story. Maze. It is Maze.

Maze prison. The maze prison. It's my guess. It's my guess. My guess is the maze prison. And you'd be prison. Prison. Maze prison.

Are you saying prism? No, I was saying prison. Oh, you think prison old? It's Maze prison in Northern Ireland, because this is a jail breaking episode. How is Mayes spelled? Is it M-A-Z-E? M-A-Z-E, yeah.

So named after a town, but then near where this prison is. But then it obviously got the cool nickname of The Maze. Yeah, like that a lot. What's the town named after? Yeah. A maze? Something amazing. But I didn't research.

The TV show Amazing. Yes. With James Sherry. Great show. This topic was voted for by the Patreon supporters put up three topics and they picked this one and it's been suggested by two people

over the years and that is by Ted Logan from Melbourne and from James Deanie in London. Oh, interesting. And was this a bit of a landslide in the vote or just one? Yes, of the three

topics it got 50% in the vote. So it did quite well. But the other topics I must say they were very tempting to do. Yeah, okay, that's good. So hopefully bring them back. Yeah, keep them in the back pocket. If you disappointed that your one didn't get up.

The other ones were two Aussie stories. Okay. I just put up, at the time of recording, just put up their vote for the first live show that we're going to be doing on Sunday. And I put two up that I was like, those would be really fun to research, really interesting stories.

Put another one in that I was like, they probably won't vote for it. Yeah, a bit of filler. And it's like, it's pretty hard to research. And that's the one they've chosen. They can smell it, yes. I have to watch six hours of documentary to get information. So thank you, Patrions.

Yeah, well, good luck with that. I look forward to hearing about it on Sunday. A few tickets left if you're interested. All right, so I've got to give you a bit of background. Our story takes place during The Troubles in Northern Ireland. Now, I'll give you and the people at home in Kest that don't know, a brief background on what it is for some context, but really should be its own episode or multiple episodes one day.

It's one of those boards with the pop things, isn't it? Yeah. The trouble. Oh, yes. The dice in the middle? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. It's quite a boring game, really, trouble.

Always played it at my friend Nick's house, though. Oh, was Nick a bit boring? He just liked trouble. I think that I was bad. So that's a yes. Nick is boring. Yeah, because I wasn't. Are you still friends with Nick?

I'm afraid not. That's why. Boring. Yeah, boring. Boring, Nick. All Nick's boring. Yeah, agreed. Firmly agree.

You look like a trouble fan. But if you're boring, you just speak loudly and with conviction. and people don't notice. Speak with the cadence of comedy even if you're not making any jokes. And when you stop people laugh and then they don't think about it. And you get to the end,

they leave and they're like, it didn't say anything funny. It was just loud. But still, we'll give you an applause. Yeah. There is standing ovation. I want to watch a comedian do a gig where they absolutely bombed.

No laughter. And at the end, they said, thank you so much. Good night or whatever. And then the audience applauded. And then that person said to me, I know I've done a good job when they give me that applause and I was like no, they're just polite.

They're trained. Just what you do between acts? Blotting you leaving. Oh my God. You have not done a good job and you've not learnt anything. And that comedian's name, Nick. Yeah, classic. It's not true.

Imagine though. So the troubles, sorry to bring it back to the troubles. Also known as the Northern Ireland conflict was a period. I imagine you know a bit about this, Jess, with your Irish background. I do know a little bit. I learned a little bit when I was. in Ireland and Northern Ireland as well. But, you know, it is a very complicated, and it's very nuanced.

Yes. I should actually preface this by saying I'm not trying to take a side here, trying to be as impartial as possible, presenting a few examples of what happened. But definitely not an expert on this. Okay, but who are the good guys and who are the bad guys? Anyone not named Nick? Whoa. Get out of here.

Get out of here, Nickies. So conflict, it occurred between 9. 1968 and 1998. So 30 years. Also a long time to cover. In Northern Ireland, with violence spilling over to the Republic of Ireland, England and even the mainland of Europe. But most of the action went down in Northern Ireland

because that's what the war was about. Northern Ireland was and still is part of the United Kingdom. It borders and shares an island with the Republic of Ireland, which is a bit of a confusing sentence. But they're spelled differently and written out. It basically is in the top northeast corner, the top right, Jess. I'm bad at geography, and Dave knows it, and I love it.

The whole thing is very complicated and can probably be traced back as far as the 12th century. Yeah. And I'm not going back that far. It's so complicated. But essentially, it boiled down to two sides. Unionists or loyalists who desired Northern Ireland to remain part of the United Kingdom, happy with the way it was, and then nationalists or Republicans who wanted Northern Ireland to become part of the Republic of Ireland, to have one country on that island.

The UK loyalists were overwhelmingly Protestant, and the nationalists who wanted to be part of Ireland were mostly Roman Catholics. But it should be noted, however, that despite the use of terms Protestant and Catholic to refer to either side, it was actually not a religious conflict. Right. So that just makes a little bit more complicated. It just depends on what they had for dinner on Fridays. Steak or fish?

Were you two options? Big Fish and Chip Friday fan, I've got to say. And if that means taking your side, I'll do it. And there was quite a lot of violence during the 30-year conflict. On one side was the British Army and the Ulster Defence Regiment, who said they're on a peacekeeping mission. And on the other side was the Irish Republican Army or the provisional Irish Republican Army,

known as the IRA or as Provost. Provos. That sounds like a super Aussie sort of. I don't like it. And I'm sad to report, this is all just the preamble, don't worry. We'll be breaking out of prison real soon, guys. But it was not a great time in that part of the world, I'm afraid to say. Britannica describes it as, quote, marked by street fighting, sensational bombings.

Sniper attacks, roadblocks, and internment without trial, the confrontation had the characteristics of a civil war. My goodness, but sensational. Sensational bombings. Well done. It was sexy. God, this is a sensation. I'm going to tell everyone about it.

The bombing sensation. And this whole period is very much one man's terrorist is another man's freedom father. Very true. So the IRA were responsible for a number of bombings that killed many people. It's estimated that between 1969 and 1994, the IRA killed 1,800 people, including approximately 600 civilians. That sounds very bad. Yeah.

But then on the other side, they certainly weren't. went innocent. On January the 30th, 1972, an event known to history as Bloody Sunday occurred when 30 unarmed

Catholic civil rights demonstrators were killed and 15 more were wounded by British paratroopers during a civil rights march in dairy. And this event

actually swayed public sympathy towards the IRA and boosted their ranks. Wow. And also was a hit for Bono. Yes. Sunday, Bloody Sunday. And the Irish

love Bono. Oh, they love him. They love him. The whole world loves Bono. It's very, it's one of those guys that everyone likes, you know? Like the nice man of rock, like Dave Grohl, Bono. Yes. Jack Johnson.

The nice guys. They love them. Of rock. They should do a nice guy's rock tour. That would be true. I just thought who seems nice. And Jack Johnson popped into a way. He does seem really nice.

I thought he was like, Jack Black. I was like, yeah. He was a rocker as well. No, Jack Johnson. Jack Johnson, yeah. argue, even nicer. He apparently, oh man, this is like a fact I heard from my ex-boyfriend and I have never verified, but he said, where is this going to go?

Jack Johnson had such a low, like, such low blood pressure. It was like dangerously low. He was like too chilled out. Did he also tell you some certain facts about a guy called Chuck Norris? It does sound like. I'm going to look it up now. But you continue with you. Was your ex-boyfriend like a guy who took people's blood pressure before they went on stage at geeks?

Who is this? Who is this? Oh, this guy is. What a weird thing to know? Does he write music because he's chilled or is he chilled because his music is so chilled? He's around it all the time. Hard to say. Look, nothing's really coming up when I Google that.

Jack Johnson, he was just a 9 to 5 guy working in an office. He was just a blood pressure through the roof and then he wrote his own song and then he listened back to his own song. It was just a feedback loop. He listened to banana pancakes and was like, oh, my God. It's got more or more chill every day. He'll have that effect. What an ice guy. Of rock.

Of rock. So there's bombings on one side. There's bloody sunday on the other. Just trying to paint the picture that there was lots of violence on either side. And the violence peaked in 1972 when nearly 500 people, just over half of them civilians lost their lives, the worst year in the entire conflict. And this time period coincided with the opening of May's prison.

16 kilometres west of Belfast, which opened the year before in 1971, which is the same year that Operation Demetrius was introduced in Northern Ireland, which was in an attempt to thwart the IRA, mass arrests were carried out, and 350 people suspected of being involved with the IRA were interred without any trial. Huh. Or are they going to put them? Guess we'll never know. Good night, everyone. We'll never know. No, night.

So they were thrown in the maze, but it turned out many of the people arrested had little to do with the IRA. So not great. Whoopsy. Which obviously pisses off the people you've arrested and also is not a good look for your side. But nevertheless, over the next decade, many of the IRA's most notorious paramilitary offenders were sent to the maze. And this is again from Britannica. Just give you a little taste of what the prison was like. The prison population was divided among

Paraly... I can't say paramilitary. You just did it. Thank you so much along paramilitary lines. You've done two in a row, Dave. I just said it once and I just dropped it in. Paramilitary. It's all because I believed in you.

Thank you. Each prisoner responsible to his commanding officer. As a result, the prison was the site of many protests and violent activities, including hunger strikes, mass escape attempts and murder. It was considered by some to be a unit. University of Terror, where both unionist and national prisoners learned how to commit deadlier terrorist defences after their release. Yeah, because you're just putting them all together where they can chat.

They chat, and then they like stick to their military ranks. Yeah. And then, you know, basically their training whilst they're in prison. Ah. It's not quite what they were going for, was it? No. Seems like a little bit of a whoopsy. Well, the maze was considered Europe's most secure prison.

Ooh. In 1976. Was there a moat? There's no moat. Did it have piranhas in it? There should have been a moat with brains. It had nearly everything else you can think of. Okay.

We can think of a lot of stuff down. Little umbrellas in the drinks. Oh, good quote. Yep, yep. Yeah, of course. I was trying to placate them. But these bad, bad men, they didn't go for that. What do you mean?

They didn't want a peanut collada. Can you believe that? But that's so delightful. Exactly. Foxtail? Did that Foxtail? Yeah, they had Foxtail. Whoa.

Wow. With most of the channels. They didn't pay for all the sports, but that's, you know. They have the good movie ones? Yeah. Okay, yeah, that's all right. And they had Fox 8 so they could watch the Simpsons. Oh, Buffy Marathon.

Oh, yeah. Simpsons every Saturday, from 9 till 12, Saturday and Sunday. Good time. I think it was 8 till 12, mate. I don't think so. And then if you got up a little bit later, you could watch it on Fox 8 plus 2.

Oh, plus 2. Oh, I loved that. But if you got up too late, you missed them both. Yeah. Tragic. But it's like, you're not getting up until 2pm? What are you?

A hungover 18-year-old? Oh, okay then. That was me. Also, TV1, diagnosis murder every day, 10am. Gave me a reason to get out of bed. Just put a TV in your room. Should have done it. You're an idiot.

What a fall. Anyway, it's a... It's very secure and I'll tell you a bit about it. It's got all the things we could think of as well, so it's wild. Including umbrellas and Foxville. Aircon? No. Swimming pool.

No. It doesn't have luxury. It's got the opposite of luxury. It's got a swimming pool. Why would only want to stay there then? Yeah, I wouldn't like a swimming pool. Don't stay in a hotel. How much are they paying?

50. 50. What? Pounds, is they used in Northern Ireland? Yes. 50 pounds? Hmm. It's a lot of money back then.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd be staying in a hotel. Yeah, this is the 70s. I want a pool. No pool. I don't want to go in it, but I want it to be there. Just in case, yeah. There was no pool, but there was a lot of bars.

Okay. But not good bars. Oh, no. Metal bars. Okay. So in 1976, eight new prison blocks were opened within the existing prison, and they were known as H blocks, because from the air, they looked like the letter H. Oh.

Or for our nerdy listeners, they reminded me slightly of tie fighters from Star Wars. Is that a thing, Mesa? Yep. Yep. Yep, yep, yep. Just trying to... They've crashed into the ground. It's trying to...

Yeah, exactly. Smushed. So just the letter H or tie fighter, whatever you want to imagine. I'll be imagining the letter H, please. Fair enough. I don't know what you two nerds are talking about. Oh, there was a 15 foot fence. I'm going to imagine two people doing it.

That's what it looks like. Yeah. Now I get it. I don't know what Dave's talking about. Nerd. Doing it, block. How's it feel to remain the biggest nerd on the podcast? Oh, come on.

I'm here. The worst one. Dern. Nerd. You're a nerd. No, I'm not. I'm a perv. Yeah.

A purve, but also a virgin. What a combo. I know. Sorry. How's it feel? Not good. So, there's these H blocks. There was a 15 foot fence surrounding the entire prison.

And then each... It's a bit. 15 feet's pretty big. It's probably big. And then each H block was surrounded by another 5.5 meter high concrete wall. And then both of those fences were topped with barbed wire. All of the gates on the compound were made of solid steel and were electronically operated. And then there were armed British guards standing on top of lookout towers,

ready to shoot anyone who attempted to scale a wall to freedom. So it's not a great place. I don't want that job, just being the guard. I mean, I like the fact that you're up high. That'd be fun. Yeah, what a great view of a prison. I hope you got to, like, climb some fun stairs or a ladder or something to get there. That'd be fun.

I wouldn't mind that. Nice views of a prison. And you wouldn't mind the shooting people. Now, that's the bit I don't like. What? Yeah. Surely that's why you sign up. Because then I'd just be like, oh, I missed, you know.

And then I'd probably get fired. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They'd dock your pay certainly. Because I missed. Because I didn't kill anybody. Because you didn't fire the gun. They'd probably put your photo up in the teary. Miss of the week.

You know? I don't miss of the month. I'll tell you that. Because I keep missing. Missing. So these H-Blocks were specifically how's those convicted of, quote, scheduled terrorist offences. So, you know.

People that had done some terrorising, so to speak. Essentially, each H block was its own prison that was within a prison, and then the whole thing was inside an army base. Wow. So to break out, you have to escape out of two prisons and then an army base. And because of this, it was considered an escape-proof prison. Why? Don't say shit like that. A statement that I love.

Me too, because it's like, oh, now you've fucked it. Now you've jinxed yourself. It's like the unsinkable shit. Oh no, iceberg. Every time they say it's proof. Yeah. What if they said the unsinkable prison. Okay.

Well, those lookouts. Well, why do you think they got look at us? They were binoculars making sure that those icebergs don't make fools of us again. Yeah. And if you see one, you better shoot out of Jess or you'll be missive year. I'll shoot at an iceberg. You're happy to do that? The natural enemy of the human.

That's our main predator, yeah? Yeah, I mean, that's why I support global warming. Yeah, me too. Get rid of them. Slowly taking them down. Get rid of them. And also, I don't like the cold weather. Let's make a little warmer. Yes.

You know what I mean? Yes. If we could just warm the globe somehow, I'd be all for that. If it could be 25 degrees every day where I am, that would be great. Yeah. But I want the option to travel. So it has to be 25 degrees everywhere. Yes, and also if summer couldn't be hotter.

So if we could just have global warming in winter. Yeah. May so is this possible? We could get Elon Musk on the line. I'll give him a ring. Yeah, I'm sure he's got ideas. Elon will solve it. Yeah, yeah.

Thanks, Elon. And then do a witty tweet about it. Yeah, yeah. He is smart and witty. Witty. So they're in a prison within a prison within an army base. That's nuts. You're not supposed to be able to escape.

But those in the IRA consider themselves to be prisoners of war and considered it their duty to escape. Okay. They also thought because they were prisoners of war, they should be treated as such and given special status that would mean they didn't have to wear uniforms or do prison work like any other prisoner. Like in Hogan's Heroes.

Yes, I honestly thought of that. But then after all, you're like, how long are they wearing that leather jacket for? Does that smell? Hogan, watch your jacket. And it's going to go out of style eventually. How do you wash leather? Is that a dry clean thing or just wipe it down with a cloth?

The insides are getting a bit of wiffy. You've got to air it. Yeah, you got to air it. But then it seems like it's winter all the time there. So you need your jacket. It's very hard. How do you air it if you need to wear it? Yeah, if you need to wear it. Yes.

Okay, new demands. We all need at least two leather jackets because we're going to get one. We need to rotate them when we need to clean our leather jackets. So that's demand number one. But also I'd like to be able to choose my jacket, you know, so maybe we could take us all at the shops. We all got a Chadston. Yeah, we get a hundred dollar voucher. Yeah, you could get two leather jackets for $100. Well, I've already got one.

Of course. There's another one. Yeah. And the backup one can be pleather. Yeah. Because you're only wearing that when you're airing the other one. Yeah. You know, like one day a week or something.

Why don't you get something different? Like a blazer or a bomber jacket or something. Yeah. Yeah. They could all get matching jean jackets. May's prison boys and girls. They could get a little iron on patches. That would be cool.

That'd be fun really to customize it. Make it theirs. Yeah. And then I couldn't be like, May I said, that's my jacket. Yeah. You're like, no, it's not. That's up. Mine is a lightning bolt on the right arm.

And you can be like, oh, my apologies. My lightning bolt is on my left arm. Has anybody seen my jacket? And we'd be able to find it easily. Yes. Because we'd know what it looks like. A jean jacket. With a lightning bolt.

On which arm? Left. So, well, they thought they shouldn't have to wear uniforms or do work. And for a time of the 70s, they actually got this exemption, but it was revoked in 1976. This did not go down well, and in response, nearly 300 Irish Republicans refused to wear their prison uniforms, instead wearing blankets from their cells as clothes. Ooh. That's all they had.

Like a snuggie. Yeah. They're wearing snuggy. I'm on board with that And imagine at night They were tucking in under their uniforms And when this didn't work They instituted what's called a dirty protest

Where they covered the walls of their own cell with their shit Good, yep, uh-huh That's my next step as well First step, ditch my clothes, just wearing a blanket Okay, you're not appreciating that Sure, I'm smearing shit everywhere That's my go-to So don't pick a fight with me, may I say

Because I will smear She's very... I wasn't planning on earlier, but now I will. She's very quick to shit. Because I double dog dare you. I am quick to shit. Jess has already always got one ready to go. You know what?

I mean, there's a weird side note. But I took my dog for a walk today, and it took us 20 minutes to travel 800 metres, and he did two shits in that time. Was this a dirty protest? Must have been. I don't want to go on this... I don't want to go on this walk.

Well, this pavement... I'm going to mess it up. I'm going to take a shit. shit right here at the front of a hospital. Oh, really, dude. But then your power, I assume you picked it up. Of course. That's the real power of me.

Because if the guard went in there and said, I don't care about this and just sort of wiped it off the wall. Yeah. Oh, yeah. But they did. The conditions were horrific inside the prison. There was bugs and maggots and shit. On the walls.

Everywhere. Yeah, yeah. And so it's horrible for prisoners and guards alike. I mean, mostly the prisoners, though, I reckon. Probably worse. The guards probably got to go home at some point. Yeah. Put free walls.

Do you want to go to work if you know you're just going to deal with poo walls? Poo walls? It's a really good question. You know? Yeah. I wouldn't want to go to work. I didn't sign up to work with no. Yeah.

Poo wall. Come in here, there's felt walls. There's soundproof walls. Oh, this is nice. You know? There's not shit everywhere. Yeah. I assume no one's ever shed on the studio wall.

I don't know for sure. If they have, then someone has done a lovely job cleaning it up. Yes. If we were going to speculate who in this studio would have done that. Ow. Probably. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Probably?

Al Trombo. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's quite political. That's true. Oh, it would have been a statement. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It means something. And obviously he got his own way because it's cleaned off the wall.

And we're very close to the toilets, so you know it's not an accident, you know? He would have said he is two in the think tank. Yeah. Smeared it in. Smeared it in, yeah. And Andy would have cleaned it up because he's a nice boy. So, yeah, there you go. That's how they got their show of the pop test.

Yeah, that's how they got it. Great show. by the way, I love it. You want to check it out? It's a great scientific show host by Alastair and Andy from two on the think tank. Great part. Anyway, the dirty protest,

it's horrific conditions. And the IRA prisoners, they're able to send messages to the IRA outside and they instructed them to murder their guards. What? Wow. How are they sending messages? They were smuggling out.

Yeah, email. You think that someone would read the emails before they send them, like, go through the outbox or something. Yeah. But no, no, there was... It was probably that era where you could just be like, no, I'm just, all I want to do was raise these pigeons in the prison yard,

and they'd be like, that seems fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's fine. Yeah. Oh, that's, she's been signalling with smoke for a few hours over there. And the pigeons would send the emails, please. Yeah, obviously. Well-trained pigeons.

Tiny little computers. It's very cute. So, no, they would send these little messages written in tiny short hand on tiny, tiny, tiny bits of paper, like cigarettes, like filter-sized papers, and then somehow smuggle them out to the outside. Wow. And they instructed the IRA. hey, I don't like my guard, can he take care of him?

And according to Irish Central that published a great article about this story that I'll link to, of course, over the five-year period that these strikes took place within the prison, 19 prison officers were killed on the outside. Whoa. So they're instructing the people on the outside to assassinate the guards. Holy shit. As well as for five years on and off,

having these dirty protests and not wearing their uniforms. Another reason this job is no good. Awful. The inmates also protested with a hunger. strike resulting in 10 deaths. Whoa. Including the strike, the leader of the strike,

who would become very famous Bobby Sands. During the strike, he was actually elected to the British Parliament standing for a party called anti-H block. Remember, he's locked up

in an H-block. So we got elected, but he couldn't serve. One, because he's in prison and two, because he died, but his plight and death attracted more attention from the media

and from around the world and drove support for the IRA. So he was seen as a There's a very central figure to the IRA in this time. And you can probably guess that all this stuff led to a pretty frosty atmosphere between the prisoners and the guards. And they called the guards screws. Oh, ho.

Yeah. Not talking to you screw. But that all slowly changed. It was decided that the prisoners would attempt a daring escape. But they soon realized to do that, they would need more freedom and more intel about how the prison ran. What if you just bashed your way out?

There's a door. Bash! You meant the guards. You literally mean like like the Hulk. So I'm trying to stop me. Bash! Now the door, bash! Jesse, you wouldn't even have to do that.

You could just threaten you do that. You'd be like, listen, you let me out or else, I'm going to bash it. I'm a bash, I'm going to bash that door. I'll bash you? I'll bash that. I'll bash the gate. How are you to bash everything?

You think it's worth it? and they were just opening it. Yeah, they're like, oh, God, that sounds expensive. But if I let you out, I can close the door and the door won't be broken. Yeah. And I won't be bashed. Step this way. Bash!

Oh, but you bashed me anyway. People are not satisfied because you'd really geared yourself to bash your way out. Did anybody think about bashing their way out? Well, oh, I've got a slight story of bashing. We'll get to a bashing story. Hooray! We did it. Well, they realised that they were.

would need more intel about how the prison ran and more freedom to get away with any plot. So they decided to slowly, but surely, change their aggressive behavior towards the guards and slowly win their favour. Get the guards to let their guards down. But that's their whole job. Yeah. It's the whole thing. If you're not guarded as a guard, you're doing everything wrong. That's right.

Well, you're going to get bashed. Bash! Bash! Ha! Ow! Shit, I'm the cleaner. I'm just trying to clean off the shit in your cell. But bash!

Oh, before my right arm was injured, now they're both injured. I think you've corked it. Yeah, corked you. Give me a corky. What if they corked their way out? Yeah, cork away. And then, you know, cork their way out to cork. No, yeah, thank you.

Yes. Very good. In November 1982, the Republican prisoners presented themselves for work. something they had previously protested against. They said, oh, yeah, okay, we'll walk around here. And the jailers and the British government saw an opportunity for a propaganda win to be like, see, even the hardest IRA people are now working for us. So they happily agreed.

Oh, boy. This was an important step in getting more access to the prison. They were suddenly assigned jobs and access was given to the kitchens, places like the concrete factory, the woodwork shop, and even vegetable gardens around the place. And who was, like, cleaning the pool and stuff? Was that also guards or? No, yeah, prisoners were allowed, yeah, pool boys. Oh, great, yeah, cool, cool, good, cool.

What if you turned on the fox tail and it was just like, like, the blue screen and you couldn't, like the channels, you couldn't. Who would tune the fox tail? We call it a tech, which is also a prisoner. Yeah, nice. Oh, great. Okay, yeah, cool. Oh, great. There's a pool boy, foxtail boy, gardening boy.

And bartender? Bar boy. Bar boy. dynamite supply? Dino boy. A Dino boy, right. And what about for any bashing needs I might have? No, that was basher.

Yeah, bash your bill. Bash! Bail! Fuck! Shit, we're on the same side here. We're trying to butter up the cards. Bashing Bill's got a bash, sorry. I want to make it very clear to anybody listing.

Obviously, you can't see the gestures I'm doing when I yell bash, but they're very flimsy punches. I don't know. I believed. You did a video. very powerful uppercut, Elia. I believe that the person he bashed was flung into the air. Yeah, right. Over the horizon.

I flinched. Yeah, great. Okay. Yeah, your guns are massive. Thank you. Yes, they are. Put them away. Okay.

So, but... Did it, folks. Theater of the mind. So before all this, they had no idea about the layout of the prison. When transported around the jail, they were put into blacked-out vans or made to wear head coverings so they really couldn't take stock of their surroundings. Now they were actively looking for signs of weakness and ways they could escape. They got valuable intel from the guards, who they started referring to by their first name,

instead of their last name or screw. Morning John. Sorry, what? He usually call me dickhead. He likes me. He really likes me. I'm getting through to him. I'm changed.

Dear diary. One of the prisoners called me John today. Which was nice, but also my name's Chris. Goes home, tells his wife. And I got bashed. Our bill, fuck. So some real swings and roundabouts today. They also started chatting about football and, you know, social things.

Some of the guards were suspicious at first, but most thought they'd finally just broken the prisoners and they were happy. Okay. What did you think about Buffy today, they'd say? Oh, God, he's really lost it. Do you catch Buffy today? Don't worry, there'll be an encore later on if you missed it. It's right.

Starts in about 15 if you want to go and check it out. I personally prefer. Angel. Slowly the prisoners were able to get little bits of information out of the guards about shift changes and what days were busiest for them. Just imagine them they'd be like, so if you were to break out of this prison, when would you do it? Is there any, I don't know, like, weak points?

What are the top five week points? Yeah. Maybe write them down for me. It seemed like inane chit chat, but the prisoners were slowly putting together all the information to form a bigger picture of the prison and how it ran. The guards also got more comfortable with the prisoners being closer to them and hanging around in places that were previously off limits.

Like they might... You like the outside. Hey, Bill's out there. Just get two minutes and I'll come back. Just give me... Yeah, yeah, I'm just going to have a smoke. Just want to stretch my legs a little bit. Oh, that's fine.

You'll come back. Yeah, of course I will. Hey, John, it's me. Would I run off? I'll be back for Angel because I know you like Angel the most. Also, it's Chris. Nah, I'm just kidding When I call you, John

It's a nickname Great, great, great We're besties Bash John, John, why are you Bill, why are you getting to the car My car and driving it away? Why are hot wiring my car, Bell?

So they're just hanging out And aerial photographs taken by the media Were also smuggled into the prison To give them a better idea Of the layout of the camp Oh my God, we're stuck in here There's walls and everything, I don't know Oh shit!

Oh my gosh She's going to be harder than I thought. Maybe that original plan of bashing our way at wasn't so dumb after all. I love they all here. Oh, so that's why they call them H-Blocks. Ha-ha. I thought they just had ABCD, EFG. Yeah, I thought it was in H-block.

I'm going to write an epic sci-fi movie about these blocks. Tie fighters. George Lucas. He's in the prison. Oh, George Lucas is there. He was in there. Oh, geez. What an origin story.

The more you learn. According to Iris, the Republican magazine, published in 1993, the whole operation was a bit ramshackle at first, with men wanting to escape and some just going for it on their own. Enter Bill the Bashar. One man smuggled in a hammer. Oh dear. His plan was, he blasted Springsteen's Born to Run on a record player as loud as it would go.

And not one of the nice men of rock. Exactly. Baby I was born to run. He blasted that whilst hammering or bashing, if you will, into the concrete wall, apparently oblivious to the fact that the whole prison could hear him bashing. Oh, honey. So that didn't end well. That was stopped.

Oh, that's silly. In 1983, it was realized they'd have to work together for any real chance of success, and they set up an escape committee, headed by Larry Marley, who had formed for escaping from dozens of prisons. In fact, in 1978, he had nearly escaped May's prison whilst dressed as a prison warden, but was captured before reaching the prison perimeter. Because the real warden walked in. Nude.

He didn't have his uniform. But I love that I've said that he nearly escaped, captured before reaching the prison perimeter. That's not nearly escaping. No. Well, he got through a couple of doors. He's as close as anyone else inside the perimeter. Not through that moat. You know?

Yeah, that's right. Well, five years had gone by, and he didn't want to spend months coming out with a plan for one or two people to escape. No, no, no. He wanted to bust out many people at once. Larry said the key is to think bigger than them. We don't want to refine their system.

We want to crush it. Okay. Because his worry was if two people get out, they'll go, oh, there's the weakness. We'll just stop that. They can't do that anymore. But he was like, if we get shit loads of people out, we can also,

go back to the IRA and really help our campaign. But it's a big dream. They've said publicly, this is an escape-proof prison. He's like, I don't want two people. I want dozens of people to escape. Communicating with the IRA on the outside with secret messages smuggled in. H-block was approved, H-Block 7, I should say, was approved for an escape attempt. It was run as a need-to-know operation.

And to protect the plan and the escopies, many of whom were only told a certain section of the overall plan. that way it would be harder for someone to rat on the attempt and it was drilled into them if you slip up or if you're fan out telling anyone that doesn't need to know the thing that you've been told you won't be allowed to escape with us we'll leave you behind.

First rule of the fight club have a great time have a great time yes great just do your best enjoy yourself that's right we're all about friendship also no shirts no shoes

yeah okay but no one wants to be left behind So everyone's like scared into silence Because they're like, well, shit, I want to get on board Because I think, I mean, if I could put myself in their shoes I reckon I would want to be one of the ones who got out. Yes. Do you know what I mean?

Yeah, I think so. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't think I'd want to stay in. That sounds like something a rat would say. No, I'm not. Shut up, bash! Oh! That's how you get bashed, calling me a rat.

I'm a little mouse. I'll bash out. A very violent mouth. So Sunday, September 25th. Five. Five. Five. Five. Fifth I was going to say, but then I went for five. Ninety three. It was chosen as the day for the attempt. Months of planning, taking little notes, interrogating guards without them knowing, is led to this day.

Wow. They chose Sunday. It was the one day when visitors weren't allowed. And less work was performed by prisoners. No football or other recreational activities were played and because of this, less staff were required for supervision. What was the date again, sorry? September 25, 1983. For a second, I got the 83 and I got the 25 and I was thinking December and I was like, why haven't you mentioned it's Christmas Day?

None of them realized. September, got it. We all got files in our plum puddings. We saw those bars off. Right, gotcha. So there was less guards on Sundays in the actual. I got this sanity voucher for Christmas. If I could just go out and spend,

it had a sanity, get an album of some sort. What are you going to get? But no more Bruce Springsteen. I'm sick of you blasting him while you hammer at the wall. He's the best music to bash to. I've said too much. Maybe I was bashed to run. I'm going to get the song Escape, the Pina Colada song.

Great track. It was probably out by then. It's a sad couple in that song. You know? Yeah. Tragic. I was tired of my lady. we'd been together too long

like a worn out recording of your favourite song Escape the Pina Clause Yeah yeah And also you can use those little umbrellas That we've smuggled in Okay Love a Pinnacolada

So less guards on a Sunday in the Age Block But there were still 24 guards on duty Inside this block 16 of them with four in each wing of the age block Were detailed to directly supervised prisoners On their wings And six officers were deployed to Fix posts on or around the circle.

Oh. Now, the circle was the name for the area across the middle of the shape of the H, the little bar bit in the middle. It's not a circle. I would have called it the bar bit. The bar bit. But I suppose the prisoners would have got their hopes up as we'd probably. Yeah.

Let's get some of the bar bit. Yeah, it was going to hit the bar bit. Well, the bar bit controlled movement around the block. This was sort of a control centre with computer screens and intercom to the outside world. It was essentially the control centre. Right. Most of the staff were regulars on the block, but one guy had come back after a few months away

and was startled by the change in relationship between prisoners and guards and couldn't believe that they were all using each other's first names. He was actually alarmed by this, but was told the attitude and vibe had changed and everything was fine. Hey man, we're a chill prison now. We're cool now.

You've been away, some things have changed. I know that can be a bit weird for you, man, but you're just going to get on board. I mean, I was here three months ago and they were throwing shit at my face, and now they're high-fiving me. Yeah, just relaxed. What would you prefer?

A high five or shit in your face? I'd say be grateful. Okay, we've done some good work here. And we've turned them all around. Okay. Went three months? Yeah, a bit of a dick. To be perfectly honest, welcome back.

Here's your cake. But honestly, being a bit of a dick. Well, I've spent three months figuring out ways I could get back of the prisoners with throwing shit at me. And now I'm going to look at dick when I pull a prank on them. I've been pooled in this bucket for three months. I've got 12 weeks of shiz. Ready to go?

What are I going to do with it? Now I'm getting high fives. Jesus. I suppose I could smear some poo on my hands for the high fives. That'll get them. Give everyone a poo-y high-fired. But then I have poo on my hands. Worth it.

It should be noted that within the H, none of the guards carried firearms. So the only weapons they had were batons of sorts. Okay. Basically, I think the idea is that if there's no guns in there, the prisoners can't get access to it. Yeah, sure, that makes sense. But... I'd want a bazooka.

As a guard or a prisoner? Um... Both. Or to bash my way, yeah. Or in. So you're bashing the wall with the bazooker. Yeah. Not shooting it, just bashing a hole.

I think I want to be the Hulk and just smash shit. Some sort of she-hawk? Am I angry? Hmm. What's going on with me? I think maybe we're a breakthrough Yeah I think I'm a little bit mad I just want to bash some stuff

I think I just need to go to one of those rooms Where they give you a baseball bat And a bunch of plates And you can just bash it Yeah I'm gonna go there That does seem fun I'm gonna work some stuff out

Dave too go on I'm gonna play some mini golf Okay So the guards don't have guns But an integral part of the mission Was to get the guards To surrender immediately and quietly Without alerting the rest of the prison

And to do this it was decided that the prisoners would need guns. So six handguns were somehow smuggled into the prison. And as of 2008, 25 years later, when a documentary was made on this escape, it still has never been revealed how the IRA managed to get six handguns into a secure prison. But now they were armed and the guards weren't. Oh, boy. Wow. But yeah, sort of tips the, you know, slightly in your favour.

Could we figure it out? I think we could, if we, if we, the brain trust, I think we could probably figure out of the guns in. Cool, we reckon. Um, butt gun. Yeah, but gun, certainly. Butt gun. In a butt. Um, put it in a butt.

Yeah. Put in that really tough Irish bread. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, bake it in. Bake it in, some, bake it in. Yeah, yeah. Beef and Guinness and gun pie. And they were like, yeah.

Yeah, I guess, I guess that's always on the menu. Here you go. Here you go. Here's your beef and Guinness and gun pie. All right. Yeah. Can I put the gun on the side, though? I just, I don't like, you know, I like to mix it in when I.

You fussy prisoners. But yes, all right. Yes, you can have the gun part. It is two months till Christmas. Three months. Fuck. So they've got guns. Five of the prisoners involved in the plot were Brendan Bick, McFarlane.

See, I was wondering when we're going to get to the colourful characters. Oh yeah, so BIC, B-I-K, McFarlane. B.I.K. B. B.A.K. B. B.E. A couple of Brendan's. Bobby Story. Jerry Kelly

and Tony McAllister Oh, these are some good names Some good Irish names According to the Belfast Telegraph Each was serving a long sentence For serious terrorist defences McFarlane Mead and McAllister Was serving life sentences for murder

Kelly was serving two life sentences For causing explosions in London resulting in serious injury to approximately 200 innocent people And Story was serving 18 years For possessing firearms and ammunition So they're not great, are they? They've all been around the block.

They probably just let him keep him in the prison. Yeah. Yeah. It's why they got them in. I forgot to pat him down. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, how can you be expected to? It's work.

You'd be constantly patting. Just all day. They then wondered how they could possibly get out of the prison once they'd taken the block. That's the next. Next worry. It was noted that a food delivery truck drove around the prison several times per day and was rarely, if ever searched.

Over time, the guards, on the checkpoints had let down their guard a little bit and started letting in the truck driver based on site alone. They knew him well. They trusted him, you know, when he pulled up at the gate, they'd be like, hey, how's your morning? They'd have a catch up, let him in. Why are they going to search the truck?

They know him. It's a good guy. The prisoners hoped that if they could take the prison area, they could change into guard uniforms and then get to the truck, then they'd be able to drive out the front door without the alarm ever being erased. raised. Perfect. Okay. So at 2.30 in the afternoon, the men put their plan into action.

Bick McFarlane had already noted the names of all the officers in the block. The prisoners needed 12 officers' uniforms to pull off this escape attempt and needed to match the prisoner with the officer whose clothes they would steal. So he sized everyone up and said, he's about a small, we've got a medium here, Greg's got a lunch. Wow. You don't want to mess that up. You don't want to be...

Nobody's swimming. You could also do a little prank and be like, oh, sorry, match up the smallest guard with the biggest prison. Yeah. Tiny. Yeah, tiny. Bit of fun. He can't even get his shirt done up.

Loll. And you've got to remember that this guard is a winter and this guard is an autumn and the colours are going to... Yeah, yeah. I'm assuming the guards are all wearing uniforms like that are the same but different colours to match their palates. Right? Yeah, exactly.

A different eyes, certain hair. Can't put me in brown. Yuck. That is a crime. Greens and blues over here. Thank you very much. Thank you. Dave, you can obviously pull off any colour.

Yes. Even a shirt with bananas on us. Yeah. I don't know how he does it, but he does. Rainbow uniform for me. Really stand out in that crowd. So the aforementioned five men, Bick Macfarlane, Brendan Mead,

Bobby Story, Jerry Kelly and Tony McAllister walked into the circle, which is the control room. under the pretext of doing their jobs around the prison. McFarlane went out to the bins as he normally did. He was the bin boy. The others placed themselves within line of sight of each other and in positions that enabled them to shadow each member of staff

on duty in the circle. So they're watching everyone very closely. The code word for the beginning of the operation was bumper, which was the name of the machine used to polish the floors. Oh yeah. So once the prisoners heard, heard McFarlane shouting, Bumper, the attempt was on. But also the prison guards would be like, why is the yelling bumper?

They'll hear you yell, escape attempt, escape attempt. It's go time, bitches. They'd be like, what? Once this was shouted, a 90-second countdown began, beginning with the group silently capturing four officers who were gathered in one room. They decided to use aggressive language and extreme verbal aggression to get the prison officers to do what they wanted, but they were worried that they had to be forceful,

forceful but quiet, that whispering would be less threatening than intended. So they actually practiced what they were going to say. Oh my God. That's kind of cute. Yeah. They're really scripted. So they're going,

we don't want to have to hurt you, but we wit line. What is that? And then they're, well, that'd be really good for me. That'd be good for all of us because then you don't have to get hurt,

but take off your clothes, please. I'm going to give you two options. You can either, you can let us. tie you up or bash. We're going to bash you. I can bash you. I'm going to bash you.

Who's going to... Who's got cash? No, no cash. Bash. Unfortunately, they found the only older guard with terrible hearing. What? Look, I'm going to bash you. Oh, and everyone knows.

Yeah, everyone's heard it now. They also decided they would only use violence if absolutely necessary as they wanted to escape. They wanted the escape to be portrayed positively in the media. Okay. Then when the IRA to live, look needlessly violent. These are people who are in prison because of violence.

Yes, but they wanted it to be like, we escaped without hurting any innocent people. Even though previously we've heard a lot of innocent people. Hey, it's a new day. That's right. So Bobby Story... We're just living our truth, you know? Yeah, I respect that.

Yeah. Bobby Story entered the room with four prison officers. He and another prisoner then produced the guns and pointed them at the heads of the officers and quietly demanded that they get on. He also did the badass move of cocking his gun to prove it was real and not just a replica. Well, that's good. So it was like, get on the ground.

Chick. Sorry, did you just say chick? What does that mean? Did you call me chick? Am I a chick? My name's Chris. Why can't anybody remember my name? From then on, it was a chain reaction.

The whole operation was done by line of sight and significant. So as soon as one officer was taken down, the next prisoner stepped up and took the next officer. Through signaling each other via several lookouts to place around the prison, they were able to quickly and very quietly take most guards out of action one after the other. Shit. And do it extremely silently. The hardest and yet most important part of the job, though, was to take care of the officer in the circle, the control room that connected the block to the greater prison outside.

One slip up there and they could alert the officer. authorities and the escape attempt would be instantly over. Right. Because they had an intercom, a panic button, a radio and a telephone. Yeah. Now, in theory, the circle should have been very secure. Oh dear. Oh, no.

We're starting any sentence with, in theory. And in practice, it was. They didn't get nowhere. So that is the end. It was supposed to be protected by a solid bulletproof door, fitted with a high security lock, which was then further protected by a metal, grill gate immediately outside the door.

Okay. But it was protected by marshmallow. Some marshmallow. And they just ate their way through? It took six hours. Worth it. But because of a defect in the design of the H-Blocks, there was no effective ventilation in these communication rooms.

And it was not uncommon for the officers working in them to open the solid door and then rely on the open grill gate to secure the room. Get in a bit of fresh air. This design fault was identified to the appropriate headquarters department shortly after the blocks were opened in the mid-1970s, but nothing was done to correct the problem. Isn't that just typical? So typical.

It's like when you tell the landlord that your hot tap doesn't turn on or off without being tightened by an Alan key first, and they take several months to still not do anything. For example, off the top of my head. Yeah, yeah. And then you escape from prison. And they're like, oh, nuts. Should have done something about that.

You've got such a vivid imagination. Thank you. That felt so real. Yeah. Yeah, that would be frustrating for someone. Yeah, but surely it can't be. Surely not. Who would put up with that?

An idiot, probably. Like a wuss. Big old dum-dum. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd say stand up for yourself. Nah, no, no, no. I'd go on a dirty strike if I was you. Okay.

Honestly, if you want something done. Smear shit all over my house. Shit on the wall. Yep. That Alan Key will be tightened by close of business. Okay. And the shit? Well, I mean, you've got hot water to clean it up.

Okay. It's great, it's great system. I'm listening. Yeah, you want your rent dropped? I mean, hypothetically, hypothetically. Yeah, hypothetically. Hypothetically, shit on your wall. When planning the operation, they'd noted down the four people who worked in the circle

and only rated one of them as likely to give them any trouble. So it's a one in four chance. Not bad. A certain John Adams nicknamed Grizzly. And when do you know it, Grizzly was roster. on that day. Of course. In the morning,

Bick had already asked him, working half a shift today, and then when he said, no, I'm here all day, Bick had been like, oh, fuck. Yeah, we're screwed. Fuck.

But luck was... I'll let your guard down at all, Grisley? You're going to do that today? You know, going to keep this door open? That'd be really good for me. Gonna turn you back at any point,

Grizzly. Well, luck was also slightly on their side because the big door was open for airflow and just the grill door was used. Essentially, it looked like a classic bars and a prison cell. Yeah. Meaning you could easily walk up to it and point a gun through the bars at the person on the other side.

And that is exactly what Jerry Kelly did. He walked up to the bars and pointed a gun at Grizzly Adams and said, Don't fucking move. Get on the ground. This is an IRA operation. If you move, I'll shoot. If you do what I tell you, you won't be hurt. If anybody phones here, you're asking what the problem is.

is, you then take 30 seconds, and whatever the problem is, you go back to him and say, look, that's been sorted. Okay. Adams then said, what if they don't believe me? To which Kelly responded, you make them believe you. Okay, now we've got to act under pressure. Fuck. Oh, would you look at that.

It's all sort of. Turns out, I hadn't even plugged the kettle in. But now it's all good. So, hooroo! And now we're on a space station. What's happening here? You've gone too deep into the yes and. Is everything okay over there?

Yes. And I've got... With the zoo! Oh, space jump! I've got a beautiful tutu on. Okay. It sounds like things are really bad over there. Yes!

And I require assistance. I'm going to need an occupation. So he, this is actually, Kelly said you make them believe you. That's what he recalled in a dog. documentary 25 years later, so I'm not sure if he's just making himself see more badass. Spoiler alert, he's still alive. Jerry Kelly's still alive. And people from Northern Ireland will definitely know this guy, which we'll talk about

the end. But all seemed under the control until a prison guard unexpectedly came out of the ladies' toilets and distracted Kelly standing there with a gun. Were they a female prison guard? I think it was a man, and I have no idea. No one ever addressed why they were in the toilet. It's a funny thing to note, so specific, came out of the ladies. Ladies' toilets.

Yeah. I guess maybe they were, they had the guns on the, like they were prepared for the men's toilets because all the guards were men. But maybe they were like, come on. Surely no one's using the ladies.

That'd be rude. Probably cleaner in there. Yeah, but it turns out... A bit of privacy. He was doing number two. Yeah, yeah. Is that guy collecting his shit in a bucket? Yeah, he's a nervous pooper.

No, there's no women in this prison. I'll do it in there. No one or no. Perfect. So this guard comes out of an hour. He was overpowered quite quickly. But Adams, Grizzly, the one that might cause trouble.

He was on. on the floor of the circle, he noticed that Kelly, who was holding the gun, was distracted for a second. Oh, dear. And he went for either an alarm or his nightstick.

It's not clear. Kelly responded by quickly firing two bullets. First one missed, but the other hit Adams and he collapsed with a bullet to the head. Oh, no. Spoiler or let's see you don't hate this. He survives.

Okay. But he got shot. In the head. In fact, despite being shot above the eye, 30 seconds later, he gained consciousness and Kelly asked him why'd you do that and Adams responded I don't know you've destroyed the part of my brain that had my memory in it so I don't remember anything he shot me right through the memory I don't know why who are you and why are we at the zoo

just above the eye and he survived yeah that's incredible how lucky maybe he's a tiny little gun oh that makes sense was it a tiny little gun is that what you failed to mention it was a little handgun importantly for the prisoners maybe this makes sense that it's more because no one outside the block heard the shots. Oh, wow. They were worried that it was instantly going to be over. Holy shit. But the cover's not blown.

So he shot him and then they've had this baffling conversation of why'd you do that? And he went, I don't know. I don't know. Why'd you shoot me, mate? It's like, yeah, when you're trying to reason with a toddler, why'd you do that? I don't know. I'm three. I'm disappointed.

I'm not mad, but I'm disappointing. Why? And I'm bleeding from the head. What a day I'm having. Tell you what. So they're taking the block with precision in under 20 minutes. It's now under their complete control. Wow.

You know when you put off a job for a really long time and then you do it finally? And takes no time at times. They're like, I could have done this 20 years ago. Yeah, you leave sheets in a washing basket. They're clean, but you can't be fucked folding them. Then you do it and it takes five minutes. That's what they would have been thinking. They would have been like, oh, gosh, this was easy.

And all I did it was shoot a man in the head. She done this ages ago. Go, we have silly duffers. And you know what, the next time I'm in prison for 20 years, I'm going to do the exact same thing. Yeah. What am I like? Yeah, it gets to year 18 and you go, all right. Better get into action.

So all the officers who were captured were then brought into the same room with the hands tied behind their backs and pillowcases placed on their heads to hide the identities of their captors. And so they looked like little ghosts. Yeah. Twelve of the guards were stripped and the prisoners put on their uniforms. Do they leave their undies on? I think they did. Give them a little bit. Yeah, but you're going to have authentic prison guard underpin.

Got to get into character. Yeah. So they give them their clothes. No, I think they left them there in their boxes. Oh, that's a bit embarrassing, isn't it? Yeah. I feel a bit self-conscious about my body. I don't want everybody looking at me.

Oh, stop looking at it. Stop looking at me. Except that one go who's like, oh, no, don't take my clothes. Yeah, no, don't. Don't. Do it. I've been working out for ages. Yeah.

Roll me over so you can see my abs. It's worth it. They're very impressive. They're really good. The prisoners were then read a statement saying, it's funny because now the prisoners are the guards. Anyway, the guards were a red statement saying, this is an IRA operation.

We're not here for revenge or to punish you over the hunger strikes, but if you interfere with the escape, you will be dealt with swiftly. Oh. The next stage of the plan was to commandeer the food truck driven by David McLaughlin. Oh, McLaughlin. Oh.

Oh, sorry? Uch. Oh, I came out of me. Food truck. It's been getting very Irish in here, let me tell you. Well, he arrived on time half an hour later and was taken at gunpoint, and Bobby's story said to him, this block is now in the hands of the IRA. All screws who obeyed our orders are safe, but one who didn't was shot in the head.

We will shoot anyone who endangers our planned escape, including you. Not surprisingly. Glockland, co-operated. And we're taking all your tacos. Yeah. It's a taco truck. Yeah. Oh, my God.

Well, the prisoners was then loaded into the back of the truck, presumably with all the tacos. Guess how many prisoners were loaded in the back? Eight. 400. Somewhere between eight and 400. You're right. Nice. 37.

Nailed it. Yeah. This is an escape-proof prison, and they just loaded 37 prisons into the back of the truck. Jerry Kelly, who's the one who'd already shot someone, crawled into the foot well of the truck, and he held his gun on the driver McLaughlin, who they needed to get through the front gate, remember? His face is recognised by the people.

Kelly, so he's crouching down out of sight, but the gun is trained on the head of McLaughlin. He asked McLaughlin how much he got paid, and he answered, not fucking enough. Yeah, that's fair. Which is pretty good quick. McClellan is not having a good day. No.

Seconds ago, he was about to have a knockoff taco. He knows they always order too many. They love tacos in the 80s in Northern Ireland. Yeah, for sure they love. There's a big taco renaissance at the time. A tacos from Ireland? I believe so. I've never known where they're from. I love Irish food. I love Irish food.

Irish culture. Bono. I love Bono. Bono loves a burrito. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that also Irish? Yeah, I believe so, yeah. It makes sense. It makes sense if you love some. Yeah.

So they drove to the control room of the main gate, which was known as the Telly Lodge. Oh. I don't know why. I don't like it. Tele Lodge. Tele Lodge. I don't like it either.

It took me about four times of them saying in the documentary I watched in their Irish accents before I realized. Oh, Tally Lodge is what they're saying. The 12 prisoners, because it's a phrase I'd never heard. It's bad. Stupid. A good phrase. The 12 prisoners dressed in guard uniforms,

went inside the main lodge, and pulled out their weapons and captured the guards inside. Nice. Then the phone rang in the lodge. Oh no. They told a guard to answer it and with two guns pointed at his head. One's not enough.

They said, answer the phone. If you say a wrong word, it will be your last word. Which would have been cool if they just said last. But hang on. It sounds like they actually said word to us. If you say the wrong word, it would be your last word. But have they given him a list of right and wrong words? How does he know what's wrong?

Good question. That's a great question. What's he's like, what am I supposed to say then? Woozal Wuzzle. Yeah. If I say Wuzel Wuzzle, is that wrong? Will that be my last word? The phone's been ringing for six minutes because he went out.

Fine, all right. These are a list of banned words and these are a list of appropriate words. He answered. Apparently an alarm hidden under a TV in the room had been tripped. So one of the guards went on the floor had hit a silent secret alarm. The man who answered the phone in the tele lodge said, Oh, everything's fine. And the main gate told him, oh, just reset it.

To which he responded, oh, how do you do that? Now, the answer, which he should have known and did know, is just to unpress the button. It's something, it's like a button that goes in. And if you take it out, it turns it off. Yeah. But he was trying to alert them that something was wrong. Yeah.

So the plan was okay to keep going. Although the plan had been delayed and they had arrived at the lodge later than intended, that accidentally taken it during a shift change, so more and more officers began to arrive for work, each entering and then immediately being taken hostage. Oh, no. So soon there was 24 officers being held by 12 prisoners. So they were supposed to, so they've got twice as many people as they thought they were going to have to worry about.

the offices And it was bring your kids to work now For fuck sake And bring your grandparents Oh Jesus Christ Which is weird They keep doing that In a workplace

Like it's cute at Kinder But like at a workplace Why am I bringing my elderly grandparents here? And then Bono drops in for an impromptu concert Bring Bono to work down I love Bono I'm Irish, I love Bono It's one of the nicest men in rock

Yeah the only thing that could stop You know To bring both sides together was Bono Yeah. But sadly he was shot that day. I'm so sorry. It's so terrible to find out this way. It's why the album Zeropa.

Yeah, it's true. If that indeed is an album, I don't really know. Which was the album that we all had on our, it automatically downloaded on everyone's phones? Yeah. Oh, is it songs of innocence? Songs of innocence. Yeah.

Songs of experience. I don't know that. Because it was on your phone. Probably still is. It is. Because, you know why it is? Because my girlfriend gets in the car the other day. And why are we listening to You too?

Because the phone had connected automatically to the Bluetooth of my car and just played the first song that was on there. Because these days everything's on Spotify. The only thing actually downloaded to the phone is fucking you too. Yeah. Makes sense. Great band. Actong, baby. So, so more, there's 24.

Four officers, 12 prisoners, the officers suddenly realized, we've got the upper hand here. So they began to fight back and a bit of a brawl erupted in the tally log. Uh-oh. Uh-oh, it's bash is time to shine. There's a lot of bashing on it. Let me in there. Bash. I want to throw someone through a window.

Bash. You know, you know, there's always a moment in like one of these kind of prison break heist kind of movies where like the specialist gets to jump in. Yeah. This is just where everybody in the audience would be like, yeah. Time for bash a bill. Yeah. So fire breaks out. Meanwhile, two officers realized what's going on.

They managed to wedge their cars in the gate blocking the truck from escaping. Oh. So the remaining prisoners who'd been waiting patiently in the back of the truck, presumably knee-deep in tacos. They got out and joined the fight, and now there was a proper fight happening out in the open. During this brawl, five officers were stabbed. Oh, my God.

With guns? Yeah. That doesn't even make sense. Oh, okay. Hand comes with a mini bayonet. Like a Swiss army knife duct tape to the top. Sadly, one of the officers had a heart attack and later died. Oh, shit.

According to Irish Central, a number of escapees were later tried for his murder, but were eventually acquitted after the judge concluded it could not be proved that the stabbing caused the heart attack, which killed him. Wow. Even though it was kind of like, was he going to have a heart attack without the stabbing? Yeah. But they didn't get charged.

So the fight was in full view of an armed British, guard up in a tower. But because most of the people fighting were dressed in prison guard uniforms, he didn't know who to shoot at. Of course. Because he's been trying to aim for the underpants. And they've got in the prison guard. Exactly.

He's like, well, C.K. Calvin Klein, thank God we signed that deal. Yeah. Sponsorship at its finest. In fact, the guard actually later revealed he thought it was a staff only brawl. Oh, you just thought the staff would just have them. Because there are 36 people in guard uniforms punching on. That would be confusing. A few other prisoners and he's like, what is going?

I don't know what's happening. Four prisoners attacked one of the officers and hijacked his car, which they drove towards the external gate. They crashed into another car near the gate and then abandoned it. Two escaped through the gate. One was captured exiting the car and another was captured after being chased down by a soldier. So suddenly it's absolute pandemonium. Some started shooting at the officers to hold them back to.

allow time for the rest to escape. One officer was shot in the leg as he chased the prisoners. The prisoner who fired the shot was captured after being shot himself, and by actual guard in a tower. And another prisoner was captured after falling. The other prisoners escaped over the fence, and by 4.18pm, the main gate was closed and the prison secured after 35 prisoners had breached the prison perimeter.

The escape was the biggest in British history and the biggest in Europe since World War. War two, 35 people having escaped the escape-proof prison. Yeah, insane. Stop saying, oh, I can't possibly, oh, you can't get out. That just makes people want to try. If they said, this is a prison we've built where an absolute maximum of 40 people could escape, then they'd be right.

They'd be absolutely right. Headline tomorrow, Margaret Thatcher, correct. Yeah, that's exactly what it would have been. You're right. idiots. I mean, that would have been the headline regardless, I think. They like to print that sort of stuff. Yeah, that's right.

Also, nudes on page three for some reason. So far, so good, but now they're out, what do they do? Yeah, where do you go? Because remember, they're sort of in the middle of the army base area. Well, an IRA convoy was meant to meet them. Oh, me too. Well, due to an error in timing, someone cocked up the time. They got out there and no one was there to meet them.

So they either ran for it or they hijacked cars. They thought they were supposed to pick them up at 4 a.m. Instead of... Yeah. Oh, no. Classic. We should have used 24 hour time. Fucking hell.

That's why I always say. Always use 24 hour time. Well, when Bobby said 1,600 hours, I was like, there's no such thing as 16 o'clock. Idiot. It's a fucking idiot. But you don't want to question a man with a gun. No, God, no.

Authorities also leapt into action because they quickly realized that they'd been an escape. cordons and vehicle checkpoints were set up on all roads leading from the prison area by 4.25pm, which is 7 minutes later. Shit. Story, McFarlane and Kelly, who were three of our main guys, split into three separate groups. One of the groups, four escaped prisoners led by Robert Story, they were quickly found hiding in the water under a bank of the river Largan about half a mile from the prison. They were detained without incident and returned back to the age block. Story recalled in the documentary that when he was captured and returned to the prison, it suddenly sunk in what they'd done.

They'd escaped. Even if only for a few minutes, he felt this massive sense of euphoria. Oh, wow. Because obviously, he was about to say, I thought he was about to say that he was really upset. But he was like, oh, I was the highest I've ever felt in my life. That's sad. Because we've done it. Because we've done it.

Fucking hell, Rob. He's like, we got kids. And yeah, they're like, oh, this was the best day of your life. Bloody hell. When you were rounded up and put back in prison. It was a massive statement, even to only get out for four minutes. It was a real PR disaster for Margaret Thatcher over in England who'd been talking tough against the IRA.

So she was very, very unhappy. 19 of the 38 prisoners who left 8-7 were recaptured within 24 hours, or three of them didn't get out at all, and most of them were returned to their original cells in the block. Jerry Don't even get a change of scenery It's very depressing Give me a new room at least

I say the other side for something I want to look at a different window Different view Just stare at the fucking car park for 10 years What are you going to do to get an ocean view I know we're not near the ocean Are they near ocean? I don't think so

I looked up on a map I don't think they are Maybe a lock Oh yeah Near the river Jerry Kelly and his group met it to a known nationalist-leaning housing estate in Lurgan 14 miles from...

It's great, isn't it? 14 miles from Maze where they hid out for two weeks under the floor boards of a house in a place that usually was used to hide weapons. Oh. It was so small that you couldn't even turn over. They lay it and listened to radio updates on a headphone only leaving to quote, do number twos.

He said in the document. So you'd piss next to your friends, but you wouldn't shit next to them. How close are you? I mean, you're... You're pissed friends. But you're not shit buddies. Yeah, yeah. Like, you'll smear the walls of a prison, but you won't smear the walls underneath of a floorboard.

Would you consider me a piss pal? Yeah. Thank you. For sure. Sure, yeah. Well, that felt a bit more forced over there, but okay. No, Jess, I would. All right.

Sorry, I hesitated for a moment, but I mean it. Thank you. I piss near you, Jess. Thank you. That's all I want. The other group led by... Because I think we've got a good finale for the podcast. All set.

Hands in and we'll all piss. Piss. Piss. Piss. The other group led by McFarlane drove their hijacked car to a nearby family home where they hid the car in the garage and took the family hostage. When they decided it was time to leave, he had the whole family swear on a Bible that they wouldn't call the police

for 72 hours. Okay. I'm not sure if they ever did. Give us a head start. But then they walked over fields at night before finally getting to the safety of the IRA stronghold of South Amar. Both Kelly and McFarlane ended up spending months living in the Republic of Ireland. Then in January, 1984, they flew to mainland Europe using false passports. Wow.

They had the opportunity of living relatively normal lives and starting fresh, but they chose to continue their work with the IRA and live. and lived in the Netherlands together. They were arrested in 1986 and at the time of their arrest had cash in several currencies, maps and fake passports and keys to a storage container that had 14 rifles

and 100,000 rounds of ammunition. Whoa! They were extradited back to Northern Ireland and soon found themselves back in the old age block. No. But they've been free for three years. Yeah, they did pretty well, I guess, if that's how you want to measure success.

Just having a storage unit. it filled with ammunition? Yeah, I'd rather count it in downloads to my podcast. Yeah, me too. But I guess you can escape from a prison if you want. Yeah, that's fine, I guess. This is pre-podcast, I guess that's all you had. Yeah, yeah, that's probably true.

Well, get some likes on your Instagram, guys. Yeah, get that kind of validation. So they're back in the age block, but there's three years later on the 2nd July, 1989, Jerry Kelly was released in line with the extradition conditions agreed on with the Dutch authorities. This is the guy that shot Grizzly Adams in the head during the escape. So he was paroled. He went on to become a politician and played a big part in the Northern Ireland peace process negotiations that led to the Good Friday Agreement in April 1998 that ended the troubles. And then he went on to be a junior minister in the Northern

Ireland government. Oh, wow. So yeah, he really turned it around. There you go. Some of the others made it to America where at least one of them was extradited back. But others have since been given pardons. So some got away. Never came back. Two escapis, Jared Friars and Seamus Campbell were never accounted for or heard from since the escape. Did they get away or did they die?

Trying. Yeah. Wow. Or are they DB Cooper? Are they DB Cooper? I assume so. Yeah, they're probably DB Cooper. What's the only possible explanation is what I thought.

I should know that was also awful. for the prison guards, as well as the two who were shot and survived. Four were stabbed and around 39 were kicked and beaten. Many suffered psychological effects and never went back to work. Who was bashed? Who was bashed? Good question. Heaps.

All of them, yeah. And it was not pleasant. And that's why this is a trick all along. You should never bash. Yeah. Never bash. Never bash. I'm actually anti-bashing.

Whoa. Yeah. All of that was satire. Huh. Well, you made it seem really cool, so I don't know if the satire was entirely affected. It's a great note on my satire ability, and I'll work on that. You held a mirror up to society and society liked what it saw. You were also smoking at the time, and I'm like, damn, that's looking good. Yeah. Maybe I'll smoke.

Am I maybe too cool for satire? Yeah, maybe, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, what's the kind of comedy that cool people do? Observational? Can I do observational? Hosting TV shows? Hosting TV shows. Okay.

Reading other people's jokes with your beautiful face. Unfortunately, my lot in life is to host a TV show. That's right. Hey. Oh, that sucks. You work with what you got. That sucks. Cards you were dealt.

We're beautiful. Beautiful face. That's true. Beautiful face. And piss on command. You can piss on command. Go right now. Oh, my gosh, she's doing it.

Oh, I can feel that under the table. It's more piss than I've ever seen. Oh, my God. It's like a fire hose. Turn it off. Oh, you can't turn it off on command. Okay. No, you've opened the door.

Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Go, blah, blah. Blah, blah. Swing around in here. That'd be terrible. May's Prison was closed in the year 2000, and demolition began in October 2006. Oh.

But the story lives on. In 2017, the story of the escape was adapted into a film called Maze, written and directed by Stephen Burke, and it holds a 5.9 rating on, IMDB. Oh, out of 5.95? Yes. Wow. That's a good move. Not bad. Not bad, Stephen. Yeah. Good job, Stephen. I hadn't heard of any of the actors, but... Is it an Irish production? It is an Irish production. But then some of the people were, on IMDB were complaining that the accents weren't authentic.

Oh, right. That's interesting. Yeah. Hmm. Some people are like, he sounded too Irish. Now, that's... His accent was too convincing. A little too good. I think you'll find that. But this guy didn't sound like that. That kind of stuff. Well, I mean, anytime they need an Australian character in American shows, it's so rarely an Australian. I'm like, there's so many Aussie actors over there.

Desperate for work, doing American accents, probably not that well. Just let them do an Aussie one. Baffling. Oh, point break. That's what I was thinking of. I watched Point Break for the first time. It ends. set in Bell's Beach.

Fantastic. Yeah, that's true. Not filmed at Bells. With some incredible surf. Amazing surf. The best surf, terrifying surf. Two police officers run over,

and it's the worst Australian accents I've ever seen. But I heard, I should say. But they've got like two lines, but still, get an Aussie. At least for the Australian release.

Get it dubbed over. Yes. Yes. Get Jack Thompson and... Come on. Paul Hogan. Yes, get Jack Thompson and Paul Hogan. All the best.

Get Bud. Tingwell. Bring him back. Yeah. It's from the dead for this redove. He's that good. He's that good. But to do it, I reckon.

Anyway. Anyway, that's the end of my report on the Mays prison escape. Wow. I knew none of that. I'd never heard of that at all. Neither had I. So it's just sometimes I go through the hat,

you know, as I'm sure you do, too Jess, and strike gold. You find a story you've never heard of. And there you go. So it's the biggest escape, still the biggest escape in UK history.

Was it pitched well in the hat, like to grab your attention? It was. Yeah. And also the fact that it's the maze prison. It sounds good.

It's like the rock. Yeah, it sounds good. The Maze. Cube. Like the movie Cube. Yeah. Is that a movie? Yeah.

Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's all about title. Sex sales, so to shapes. Cubic shapes.

That's right. Cubs. Sexy. Well, I liked it, but also I kind of kept feeling like the guns were cheating. Yeah.

Do you feel like a little bit? They should have bashed? Yeah, they should have bashed. Yeah, you'd be happy with it was a bashing. Yeah. I think so, yeah. Did any of the inmates have the ability to get angry and turn green and very large? Did anybody have that ability?

Yeah. Like a lepricorn. Yeah, it's like a lepricorn. Notoriously big. Very big boys. Very strong. Very strong. Very angry.

Certainly. Always angry. This is a secret. If you enjoyed this one, And their lucky chance. Two secrets. Many places were saying it was like the biggest escape since Colditz Castle. Yeah, right.

I've also done a report on. And also, Escape from Alcatraz I did an episode on. You've got a real feel for them. Yeah, the real triptitch of escapes. Which is your favourite, Dave? I would say the Coldest Castle one. That was a lot of fun. Yeah, how cold it was.

That was a crazy one. Oh, they do look like H. H's. I've just looked it up. They do look like ages. They also look like tie fighters. Does anyone else getting that? No. Don't give it to him.

That's a no. Come on, Mesa. You can be honest with me? Yeah, no. No. No. Let it go, mate. Let it go.

Thank you. Well, that's the end of the report section of the show. But it's time now for what many people call the best and most favorite part of the show. And that is the fact, quote, or question, And I believe it has a theme song. Fact quote or question.

Ding. Nice. I always remember that ding. Now, Jess, how does the fact quote or question work? Well, if you support the show on the associate producer level or above, is that right? No. On the Sydney-Shineberg deluxe package. If you support us there, you get to submit a fact, a quote, or a question.

And we read them out and we answer them if it's a question. Or we comment on them if it's a fact or a quote. Absolutely, this is correct. Now, Mesa, would you mind if we read out some fact quotes and our questions to you? I would love to hear some fact quotes and questions. So these come from our Patreon supporters and if you support. Was that one of the questions? Mesa, would you mind if we read them out?

Yes, actually, we did that come from? Submitted by Johnny. Be good. Be good. Johnny Be good. Yeah, it was actually. The subject of that song. Yeah.

It was a Patreon of ours. Huh. I've got a few movers and shakers in the Patreon. We're very successful. I was going to say, if you've got Johnny a big good, yeah. And if people want to support the show, they can do so at any time. You can unlock rewards like bonus episodes. We've put out over 100 bonus episodes now,

and we put out three extra a month that you can get your teeth into. And we also announced shows earlier. We have a Facebook group, and you also vote on the topic, so you really decide what we're going to talk about on the show. But, of course, the fact quote or question. Now, Matt usually reads these out, but Jess and I imagine we're going to have a go here today. We're going to do our best. Can you read, Dave?

No, but I've committed these to memory. And I'm putting it all on you because you've got a computer. So you're doing the bulk of it today. I'm going to be the guy. Now, what happens is people give themselves a title. And our first one comes from Daniel Headley, who is vice resident dickhead of the pod. Oh. An important title.

And he has submitted a question, and like Matt does, we never read these until we read them. So we have no idea what's going to be said here. But the question from Daniel is, what are your favourite local Melbourne bands? Mine's the scientist. Mine's a scientist. Oh, that's tough.

He says, now gigs are going again. I want to support local music now more than ever. Give me your recommendations, please and thank you. Well, I've got to give a shout out to my main man, Tom Mitchell, who some of you may know as the former lead singer of the Weid Hornet, my high school band, who is still going strong, rocking and rolling, and he's currently on a national tour with his band, Bell Haven,

who just put out a new single and fantastic act. So if you're out and about, they're my recommendation. That's great. Put on a great show, a lot of energy. I love seeing those guys rock out. That's a hard one. You know a lot of our bands, though, Jess. Well, I do, and I don't.

Oh. I don't know. The only one I can think of, just straight off the top of my head, is probably one of my favorite, like, musicians. She'd be in my of all time list. Yeah. Wow. That's Angie McMahon.

Oh, yes. Who's very, very wonderful. But I don't know. I mean, if she's doing gigs and shit, I'm going to be there. But that would be one of my go-toes. It's very hard though, isn't it? There's so, I mean, there'd be so many. But I can't think of them.

No, Andy McMahon, that's the perfect one. Mesa, do you have any recommendations? Yeah, it's tough. See? Tough, tough, tough. So, when people ask the question, we often ask them if they can answer it themselves. Oh, yes. And Daniel has done that.

His real answer is Prius Club. Little garage punk rock band out of Brunswick. Check them out. Also, Jess should play him on Triple J. Okay. Prius Club. So I get enough of those messages. on Instagram, on the text line on Triple J, sometimes to my email.

I don't need him in the fact quote or question. All right. Hey, but he's the vice resident Dick out of the pod. He's allowed to say these things. I'll take that back. What about the band? Amel and the Sniffers. They're from Melbourne.

Are they from Melbourne? They're from Melbourne. Yeah, nice one. They're a good band. What about? Oh, you know who I like? I don't know if they're from Melbourne, but they might be. Cash Savage in the Last Rings.

Oh, yes. It's a good Australian band. Check them out. on Spotify probably. Check them out. Yes. Love that. Great name.

I love that. One of the best names is that. Someone and the somethings. Love that. Yeah, very good. Catfish and the bottle of men are good for that, I reckon. Malford and the sons. Mumford and the sons of Mumford.

Bono and the rest. And the rest. Love that. So thanks, Daniel. Next up is Mike Killen. It's given himself the nickname King Man. Oh. Wow.

Huge. The man amongst kings. A lot to live up to. Hope you don't disappoint. All right, Kingman. Do your best, mate. Take your best shot. We've also got a question from Kingman,

and that is, if you could be the first person to do anything past or future, what would it be? What about present? Yeah. You could do something new right now. Whoa.

I'm guessing this is if you could go back into the past or future. Where would you go? Oh, I don't know if I like the past. Okay. None of the past. interest you? It'd be a bit, it'd be stinkier

the past. Yeah, I think so. What about, so a couple weeks ago I did an episode. I'd like to go to a couple weeks ago. Yes. Yeah, that's my answer. Want to be part of that episode? A fortnight ago.

Go on, it was a good time. I had this great sausage roll. Not sure I was eating a pie. So two weeks ago, I did an episode on George Mallory and Man Everest. And the question is, did he ever make it? If you could go back somewhere, find out something and come back unharmed. That's a great answer. I'd like to know that mystery.

Yeah, that's a good one. I'd like to go back. Did he make it, him and Irvin? What was that, what was that speaking of? What was that mystery that you guys have covered it? And I think there was some new information about it quite recently. It was a bunch of people that died on a cliff face. The died of past?

Yes. Yes, that's right. You'd like to find out what happened there. Yeah, because there was some new information. There was, yes. Avalanche, didn't they say? That's what they were saying. Well, it's a bigger avalanche.

Yeah. It's a real answer. I mean, I wouldn't want to be in the path of the avalanche. Like, I draw the line there. I don't want to know the answer if the answer is coming at me and it's going to kill me immediately. Right. I'd like to know that I can come back. That'd have to be part of it.

Yeah, yeah. Is it a bit sad that I can't possibly picture myself excelling at anything in order to be the first person to do it, like in the future? Well, that's like, I mean... I'm like, oh, it feels like a bit of pressure. First I was like, first person to go to Mars. I was like, I don't want to go to. fucking Mars. Also, it is a bit hard.

Maybe it could be something you did accidentally. Like you'd be the first person to like fall down 52 flights of stairs and live or something. And be like unscathed. I mean, live. No, I don't want to do that actually because that would still be scary. Okay, that would be scary. I don't want to do that. Oh, I've totally misunderstood the question.

Was it first? I thought it was the first person to go into the future or past. But the phrasing is, if you could be the first person to do anything. Oh my goodness. Oh. I'm so sorry, Mike. I misunderstood. I want to be like, I obviously haven't, I can't figure it out right now because you'll understand what I mean. I want to be the person who first discovers like the equivalent of like P.B. and J.

You know, I find like a really good. Yeah. Like you want to invent the new salty caramel. Yeah. Where I'm like, it shouldn't make sense, but it does. Or like a cocktail. Yeah. I mean, you could do that.

You could start doing that tomorrow. I could do. Just go to opposite ends of the supermarket and just get stuff and combine it. Frozen prawns. And WD 40. Maybe it's great, you know? Maybe it's amazing. Great.

That's a good one. It certainly would go down very smoothly. Yes. Because of the WD 40. Exactly. Really lube it up the throat. That's right. Hey?

Loob and chili powder. Wow. Make sure chilies slide down before they burn. Yeah. Wow. I'd like to invent something, like a product. Uh-huh. Like something that...

Whatever you say next is the invention, I think. Because I think it's on the tip of your tongue right now. I think whatever you say is going to be the thing. Yeah. And you have to devote the rest of your life to it, I reckon. You've got this day. Okay. I'd like something that cooks nachos perfectly every time.

Okay. An oven. An oven. I find that at many Mexican chain restaurants, you order the night, so they put them in and they set a timer, but it's never right, correct. What if the time was inbuilt? So you want a device that blows up all Mexican chain restaurants?

Yes. Because then you wouldn't even have to think about it. I want to be the first person to own every single Mexican chain restaurant in the world. And shut them down? You won't shut them down? Or you're going to buy this specific device for all of them that just does the nachos has no other purpose, just does nachos. I've got pretty low, low hopes.

But I mean, if you heard that there was a Mexican restaurant and it served the best perfect nachos every time, you'd go. You'd go. Because you'd go, how perfect could they be? And then you'd go, and you'd go, holy shit, they're perfect. Yeah. Those are the best nachos I've ever had.

Yeah, and then, like, people love them so much, it changes the world. That's it, like to be the first person to win a Nobel Peace fries for a nacho related invention. Classic white man. Yeah. Coming in, taking over something? Yeah. Unbelievable.

Not taking over. I'm settling everything down. Yeah, that's what the settlers reckoned. Wow. They were improving. I'd want to cause, I'd want to make racial equality happen. So I guess one of us is better. Yeah, Jeff, who invented a cocktail.

You're a piece of shit. You said cocktail. I said the P.B. and J, the new PeebNJ. Prongs and WD 40. Prongs and 40s, they'd call them. Yeah. Yeah. Prawnies.

Pornies. Let's go down the pub and get some prawnies. Some espresso martinis and some prawnies. Oh, that's a gross combo. Yeah, but maybe it's the best combo. Guys have invented the perfect combo, which is espresso, martinis and prawnies. Yuck. Which we've already established is prawns covered in WD 40.

Oh my God, that sounds so delicious. Yeah, what a night out. Sign me up. Right after I finished off my lube chili. Thanks so much, Mike Killen. Sorry, I misunderstood your question, but, you know, many answers there. I'd like to thank also Vincenzo Giovanni Bonadonna. What a name.

Whose nickname is, our title, Seymour Ases. Great. Which I don't get. But I love that. We've got a fact from Seymour Ases, and that is. It's obvious that you guys are fans of The Simpsons, since there's The Simpsons references in a lot of episodes, and that you guys just say that you enjoy it.

Yep, that is a good way to ascertain things about people. How does he know me? So well. Coincidentally, my favourite show, Futurama, also created by Matt Graning, I've also seen every episode more times than I can count, and have a somewhat encyclopedic knowledge of the show. In their first directed DVD, Futurama movie Bender's Big Score, there happens to be a lot of time travel,

which inadvertently creates duplicates of the people who travel into the past. A copy of Frye, aka Lars, went back to live in the year 2000 and he was able to spend his time there with his dog Seymour. I enjoyed this retcon because the episode that originally featured Seymour in brackets Jurassic Bark was very sad. Heartbreaking. Oh, that's one of the few ones I remember, like, you know, what actually happened. Thank you guys.

Glad do go on as having live shows again. That is very rad. I'd love to see one one day. One day. My partner wanted to name Ad, dog Seymour because of that episode. Wow. Because of Fry's dog or fry.

Fry's a good name for a dog. But then you compromised and you called your dog Seymour asked. Exactly. Brilliant name. Because it's fun to yell at the park. Also next on the list. Vincenzo Giovanni Bonadonna. Very good.

I know a dog called Vincenzo. That's cute. He's a Italian greyhound. Finally, I'd like to thank Dominic Stevenson, the title of Third umpire. It's a good one. Sometimes we refer to, that's the one that can eat up in the box

whilst they're doing their job, which I think is great. Eat up in the box. That's good, do you day? Thank you for giving us a fact, which is the original design for Mr. Potato Head was simply a packet of plastic body parts and accessories for a child to stick into a real potato.

Hours of fun and a snack for afterwards. P.S., the toy has been in the news recently because Hasbro updated its name to the gender-neutral and more inclusive potato head. Thank you, Dominic Stevenson. Which obviously, based on the Facebook comments, is political correctness gone mad? People lost their fucking mind.

Even though Mr. Potato Head is still a product. Yeah. If you want that one, you're welcome to it. Okay, but when's there going to be a Mr. Potato Head for men? Yeah. That's all I'm asking. I'm just asking questions, all right? There's no wrong answers here.

In fact, there's no answers from me. I don't know. Thanks so much, Dominic Stevenson. And that brings us just to our next favorite section of the podcast. Yes. And that is where we thank people that have supported the show at a certain ask prod level. That's right.

This one's from the ass prod level. They are associate producers of our hearts and above. And we like to use. usually thank them with a little game, Jess. Yes, I was thinking, because you know how you had the maze, the rock, the cube. We name their prison. Oh, I love that. They're the warden.

This is where you work. Yeah, you work at insert cool name. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you reckon of that? I think it's fantastic. And what color are the uniforms? Okay, great. Plenty to work with here.

So let's thank some people, shall we? Please. I would love to thank from kids. in there. Illinois. Is that Illinois? Yeah. I'd love to thank Adam.

Oh boy. Adam, I can't. Do you reckon it's Krap Zinsky? Yeah. It's an amazing name written down on myself. Adam Krap Rinsky? No. Krapchinsky.

Yeah, Kinski or Zinsky, I reckon. Zinsky. Adam. Sea dog. Sea dog. Yes. Where is Adam escaped from? No, the Wardenov.

The Wardenov. Adam's a good boy. I think his prison is in Carey, and it's called the Carey Carebear. Oh. That is. You look at it from helicopter, it looks like a care bear. Which one? And was that an accident?

I can't name a care. Because they were like, to the architect, we want this to be absolutely brutal. We want to crush their spirits. And inside, like, there's like, it's just concrete, no colour whatsoever. No windows but... Outside, very cute. No lights, no nothing.

And he's like, okay, we've got to make a perfectly rounded surface roof and put some... Make it furry so they can't even hear the outside world. Yeah. But it's pink fur because that was cheaper. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's got, yeah, little moons and shoot on its tummy. Yep.

It's really calming from the outside. That's right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And really demoralizing from the inside. That's why they've done it. Yeah. Yeah. So pretty good. Yeah.

Thank you so much, Adam. I'd also love to thank from Pambula in New South Wales, Jordan Hetherington. Jordan Hetherington has escaped from. Oh, my God. You keep making them escape. Oh, sorry. Okay, you can escape.

No, he can escape. In movies, I'm always on the side of the escapers. Of course you are. But, all right, no, he's the prison warden. I'm always on the side of the warden. They're just trying to do a job. Yeah, come on. He's just trying to do a job.

I'm with the warden in Shawshank. Oh yeah, no, that's a bad warden. That's a crook. Exception that proves the rule, though. Yeah. And the warden in the longest yard, the second book, like the more modern Adam Sandler one, bad dudes. They're all crusty old deans.

What about the vinyl paradise? Oh, vinyl paradise. Sounds a bit sexy. It's sexy. But, like, Paradise is, you know. It's in the back of a used record shop. Yeah. He locked out of the back.

Yeah, yeah. And they're constantly playing terrible, terrible 80s music. Oh, dear. So not you too, that. Yeah, not you too. Anything but. Anything but. People are like, please, put on the Joshua tree.

I will not. Won't do it. It's Jack Johnson or nothing. Yeah. One of the nicest man of rock. God, he's so nice. So nice. And so chilled out.

I've actually heard this fact that he is so relaxed. I wonder that's true. God I love it. Thank you. Thank you, Jordan. I'd also like that. How many, are we doing 3-Each still? What do we think?

Let's just do 3-H. Otherwise, it'll go forever and be very tedious. Okay, great, three-eachs. I would love that. I would love to thank from an unstipulated location. A mystery. Some sort of black ops prison. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I would love to thank Tim Liddell. Bermuda Triangle Prison. Yes. In the middle of the Bermuda Triangle? The triangle? Yes. That's what's in there. And ironically...

Or the pyramid. No, the triangle. Ironically, from space, it's actually a hexagon. Yeah. And so it's very confusing. But that doesn't sound tough, does it? The hexagon. It sounds stupid.

He's like, rename it, the triangle. They'll never count how many sides of this prisoner. Don't worry about it. So Tim Liddell, wherever you're from. Thank you so much. I wish you well. I would like to thank Dave. I may from Yuma in Arizona.

Yuma! Yuma! Why he yelled that. Give me two. I would like to thank Blake T. Wild. Blake T. Wilde. Blake T. Wilde broke out of, you happy to... No, no, no, he's the warden.

He's the warden. I'll break out of all prisons. Can't keep me locked in. The diamond. The diamond. In the rough. The diamond in the rough. So it was like in the middle of nowhere?

Yeah. Wow. So it's like, oh, fine. It's in the middle of a desert. You're going to escape, but we're in the middle of the goby desert. Yeah, where are you going to go? There's 500 miles of sand on every corner. Honestly, the guards just leave.

And I know you would walk 500 miles. When would you walk 500 miles? Yeah, just to be the man who walked 500 miles. Fine. It's surrounded by 1,000 miles. Oh, damn. 1,0001, just in case. Oh, thank you so, so much. Lake Tee Wild.

To fall down at your door. Da-da-da-da-da. Ah, no. Fucking great song. Going to blast you that all the way home. Probably. It's thematic. It fits with the episode.

Yeah. I would like to thank you, I may, from Atherston in South Australia. Carolyn Slater. Slater. Slater. All right. She's the warden of the prison called Adelaide.

Brutal. I was going to call it because of the Slater Cup, which is just in her partner's ice hockey. cup or air hockey. Air hockey. I'm going to call it the park. Oh, I like that a lot. It sounds. And they make all the prisoners

wear hockey jerseys and like the full outfits. So if there is any fights that don't get hurt very much. And it's very cumbersome. Yeah. Just getting around. Wandering around. And they're also wearing ice skates, but it's concrete. And you're knocking into everyone.

Sorry, sorry. Oh, sorry about that. Ow. The park. Don't give them ice skates. They could stab each other with those. Those things are sharp. Blunt ice skates.

Thank you. Roller blades is what they call. Well, Rollerblades, I love it. And finally for me, I would like to thank from Hotson. Hoshton, I believe, in Georgia, Colin Hittgers. Hitskers. I've mispronounced all of that except Colin. I'm so sorry.

Colin, we're pretty confident. It's correct, but there's no guarantees. Hotson, Georgia, Colin Hitskis. Colin Hitskers is, has just broken. out of the little prison called Adelaide. Yeah. Hell yeah. He's celebrating so hard.

We've got to give it to it. What about the matchbox? Yeah, that's good. Because that's a powder cake ready to expire at any moment. You better believe that prison is flammable. Is that a good thing? Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's how they pitched it.

The design of the architect is like, yeah, this place is going to... Everything is flammable. We're not going to seal anything so it could flood easily. Honestly, it's basically just some bits of cardboard. This prison is a disaster waiting to happen. So I would say get a good insurance policy on it because that will result in a payout. It's just an insurance fraud. I see, yeah.

To be clear, I'm telling you it's an insurance fraud. Anyway, pay me money for this. They love honesty. I love it. I love it. Thank you Colin. Carolyn, Blake, Tim, Jordan and Adam

for supporting the show and you can do so at patreon.com slash do go on pod. And there's only one thing left to do and that is to see if there's any entrance into the Trip Ditch Club. And Nick Mesa Mason,

that's people that have been supporting the show on the shout at level or above for three consecutive years. My goodness. These people are Hall of Famers in our hearts and we've set up a little club and then we welcome people into it. Jess comes up with an hors d'oeuvre and a drink.

I book in a band. Actually, would you like to say a band that you would like to? You too. Fantastic. Okay, what a coincidence because that came up. The third guy who's in here too. Yes. Larry.

His name's at Larry. Larry Mullins Jr. There we go. Great. So they're playing as a three piece. The bass player Adam was not invited. Replaced by Johnny Utah. Johnny Utah on bass.

Tonight, the rule. of Adam Clayton will be played by Johnny Utah He's undercover again Undercover is being in U2 No he's undercover in a U2 cover band Yeah But three of the members

Actually you too They're also undercover It's very confusing Wow that Bono is pretty good Bono was like I've got to go on a cover But the only thing you can conceive of is being in you two So best cover he could come up with

What's the last place you'd look Isn't it? In a YouTube cover band So they're playing, Jess, do we have an order of and a drink in the club? Yes, we'll be serving shit smeared on walls. Wow, is that like a code for something? Oh, yeah, it's just what the dish is called. Oh, thank God.

It's actually just like a gingerbread house coated with chocolate. Oh, fantastic. Yeah, it's really lovely. I love to think of shit when I'm eating. Yeah, absolutely. I know. I love to combine the two. Drinks-wise, Guinness, Seton Island.

Great work. Guinness and Bulmers if you want something different. Good. If not, I get the fuck out. If you don't like either of those, you don't belong here. That is... Just kidding. There's a full bar.

Help yourself to anything you want. Well, Jess. Yes. It's time to check if there are any more entrance and how we're going to do this? Because usually, May, so what happens is Matt reads out the name. I hype them up and then as they're hype man. And Jess hipes me up as my hype man. Incredible.

I will read the names and you can hype. You can do your usual. Because if you read the names and you're trying to hide it. it's going to be too confusing for you, don't you think? I believe so. So I'll hype that out. Mato, if you wouldn't mind, if you could just hype me up a little bit. All right.

I'll hype as well. We can both hype. It'll be great because honestly, without the hype, what am I doing? That's true. So you've got five people. Oh gosh. You can do it. You can do it.

All right. Who are welcome into the Triptus Club. These are very important people to us. And we thank them so much. And we want to hype them up. Who we got? From Bowen Hills in Queensland. We've got Cameron Fullwood.

Oh, we got a Fullwood House tonight. Yeah, Dave. Puee, Pooey, Pooey, Pooee, Pooee! Love that, yes. From Rottesdale South in Queensland, Rachel Razzie. Oh, Razzle! Yeah, Dave. He's got away with words of this guy.

Wordsmith, they call me the Shakespeare of Rap. From Ludlow in Shropshire. Oh, great. Kieran Berry. Oh, Barry nice to see you. Yes. Sounds like very nice. Yes.

Thank you. I love it. Right, rhyme the words. I love it. Yeah. From Blackburn, Victoria and the patron of this very microphone I'm talking into, it's Rachel Johnson.

I was going to blackburn down this bar until you turn up and now we're going to have a great night. You are killing it. He was going to do awesome, but he didn't do it. Yeah. You saved me from a prison sentence and probably people might have died, but you didn't let me do it. And finally... Dave, you struggle through that sentence

but you get there in the end of the end. I love it. It's all about the result and the journey. And finally, from Windhoek and what country would be in A? In Namibia. Oh, wow.

I believe that's the capital of Namibia. Oh, right. Windhook. Dave's coming up to hot with a fact. Yeah, that's a fact. I love to thank Marie Lee. Oh, Marie Lee. He said the name.

He said the name he was going to. the name you said, Jesse said it again. I was going to Mari leave until you turned up. Yes. But now you're here. Saved it. Not as bad as arson, but still bad. Wow, from Namibia, that's very, very cool.

That's amazing, cool. Well, there you go. Thank you so much to everyone that does support the show. And if you'd like to be part of any of that stuff, plus the bonus episodes, the Facebook group, all the other stuff, go to patreon.com slash do go on pod. We've got to get Matt to listen to the end of that, because he brings a lot of negativity to that part of the show. He doesn't really get it.

No, that's right. He's always very critical of Dave. Wow. And Dave's hyping. And honestly, Dave did so well today. I feel like I was free-flowing because there was so many good vibes. I think it was the really doing it for you. I really appreciate that.

I can't do it as well as Mesao, but I will record him doing it and just play it to you. Can we get it one more time? You could bring in your own air horn. Oh, okay. That's probably easier. Was that a real air horn or so good? You never know. Nick and Mason,

thank you so much for coming in and joining us on this episode. We really appreciate it. Love to be here. Love to be in the booth. And we also love your fantastic podcast, The Weekly Planet. Thank you.

Which I'm sure a lot of our listeners are very aware of, but just in case they haven't heard it, what's it all about? It's a podcast about movies and TV shows and comic books sometimes. And sometimes Zach Snyder releases a new version of Justice League

that's four hours long and we talk about it for a really long time Wow Is that what the Schneider cut is? I still don't quite get it but It's pretty much it yeah I absolutely love it Have you seen the movie Justice League? No

Don't worry about it Okay Honestly that is what I do with my superhero movies Have you got four hours Watch Zach Snott as Justice League? Four out okay is it The question is which one's better If I have to watch one?

I think the four hour one is better Okay that's good But it's four hours long Yeah it's too long I'd have to do that in a few sittings Yeah I'm 30 now My back goes if I sit down for too long

You like a shark Always moving I gotta move Never stop I can't sit still So it's a fantastic podcast honestly We do love you And of course

Mr Sunday movies James On that show We have a lot of fun And we can follow you on Twitter On Twitter I'm at Wikipedia Brown And on Instagram Nick M-I-C-M-A-U

Mm-hmm It's a bit French What that is And of course we can catch you live with the primates crew coming up on April 4. Yeah. It's coming out really soon. Yeah.

You know, assuming Matt comes back from his gig. Which he will any minute now. He's going to come back. That's right. You did promise that he'd turn up, but he did not. And here he is. And he's got an air horn. Wham!

He's fallen down the stairs. Oh dear. Oh yeah. So that's on April 4th where, of course, it's the big day. We can see primates at 2 o'clock with you, Evan, Cass and Matt. and then me doing bookcheat 415 with Michelle Brazier at Ben Russell Matt's down-up show and then us bringing it home with the do-go on part at 830. Yeah, and in between, you can be listening to me on Triple J.

You always forget that part. Oh, my Lord. Probably because we don't have to sell tickets for that bit. Exactly. It's just on national radio. Because you get paid regardless. I sure do. Jess, I've been selling tickets to that.

I've been out the front of the Melbourne Town Hall fliring for you being on Triple J. We cannot do that. It's the ABC. Oh. So you're going to get me in prison. Wow. Well, I know how to get out. I sold some at Iita Butrose lady.

Is that? No. No, yeah, no, she said she'd look into it. I'm going to have to bash my way out. Here we go. You, of course, can contact us at any time at Do Go On Pod on all the social medias and do go on pod.com is our website. But I think that's pretty much it.

That's it. We'll be back next week with another episode. But until then, I'll say thank you so much for listening. And Mesao, thank you again. Very welcome. And until next time, I'll say goodbye. Bash! Weep.

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