Do Go On - 284 - McDonalds Monopoly Heist

Episode Date: March 31, 2021

Who doesn't love a heist story? This one has undercover operations, tapped phones... and Ronald McDonald.Matt’s New Interview Show: ‘Matt Your Heroes’: https://youtu.be/VVsVGkzVNZQ Support the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: patreon.com/DoGoOnPod Buy tickets to our streamed shows (there are 12 available to watch now! All with exclusive extra sections): https://sospresents.com/authors/dogoon Check out our AACTA nominated web series: http://bit.ly/DGOWebSeries​ Submit a topic idea directly to the hat: dogoonpod.com/Submit-a-Topic Twitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: [e-mail] Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/ Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader Thomas REFERENCES AND FURTHER READING:https://www.thedailybeast.com/how-an-ex-cop-rigged-mcdonalds-monopoly-game-and-stole-millionshttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/McDonald%27s_Monopolyhttps://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/03/arts/television/mcmillions-hbo-explained.htmlMcMillions (2020) HBO Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Melbourne and Canada, we got exciting news for you. And we should also say this is 2026. Jess, what year is it? 2026. Thank God you're here. Right now, I'm in Melbourne doing my show with Serengy Amarna 630 each night at the Cooper's Inn Hotel, having so much fun. We'd love to see you there. Canada, we are visiting you in September this year.

If you've somehow missed the news, we are heading up Vancouver, Calgary, Montreal and Toronto for shows. That's going to be so much fun. Tickets for all this stuff, I believe, are online. And I'm here too. This episode of Do Go On is brought to you live from the European Beer Cafe as kind of part of the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. So only a few tickets left for our show on this coming Sunday, the 4th of April. So if you've missed out on coming to see us live, you can see Book Cheat and Primates, their first and probably only live show this Sunday, 4th of April.

All the details will be in the show notes. I say that because I can't remember them right now. And lots of good stuff to see. You can also see Matt Stewart in his comedy festival show called Nostalgia was Better When I Was a Boy. Again, details in the description of this episode. But please sit back, relax, enjoy this live episode in front of an audience for the first time in a very long time. I spilled some water.

Yeah. Fuck yeah. Rock and roll. Comedy's back. Yes. Hello, ladies and gentlemen, how we feel tonight? Thank you so much for coming out.

Welcome to another episode of Do Go On. My name is Dave Warnackie, but the best is yet to come. Could you please put your hands together and welcome to the stage. Matt Stewart and Jess Perkins. Yeah. Rock and roll.

Oh, no. I'm wondering why they went wild. A spillage. This crowd is ready to go. I walked out clapping, first of foremost, and then went, what the fuck am I clapping? And then I kicked over a drink, and then my microphone wasn't on.

First live show in 16 months. It's been a while. I'm really thirsty, so just give me a second, guys. Scarl, Scarl, you still didn't even do it. I'll save that for later. I'm so sorry He could not get through that I'm so sorry

Is this thing on? Hello? Yeah you're just not funny Check one two Check check Check No he doesn't Me

Wait you think I'm him How dare you? What about the best? Oh was that a very delayed comment About Dave not finishing the water All right If they're not snappy Just keep it inside

They've confused I liked it The best YouTube comment we ever was Matt looks more like a Dave and Dave looks more like a Matt. I could not agree more. I loved her. Yeah. Is that a compliment?

I don't know if that's... Is that a compliment? Mate, it's a compliment. You're lucky to be a Dave. You'd be lucky to be a Dave. You wish you were a Dave. Weird energy to start. Okay.

That's nice energy. I was really... I'm surprised there's people here. It's very nice. Yeah, it's great to be here in this COVID-safe venue. If anyone is listening, of course, there's 1.5 metres between every single person. We are performing to four people in an air port hangar. Let's talk about podcasts.

Give me a round of a pause if you've ever heard Do Go On before. How about the other end of the scale? And don't be shy. It's been a while. You've had a long time to catch up. But give me a round of pause. You've never heard the show before. Damn straight.

It's so funny. The nerd with the multiple Storm Trooper T-shirts Yeah, only cool people listen to this show, fella. Mate, you are the demographics. You'll love it. Thanks for coming along. Was anyone else who hadn't heard the show before? Front centre, well done, very brave.

You don't know. You don't know us. We could be the type that really go you. Yeah. Yeah, but I'm not a good throw. She will not miss the second time. That was a warning spill. Okay.

I don't know, I don't remember how to do this. Well, why don't we turn to our friend Matt and ask him to explain what is this show? When you said, well, I'm like, thank God, we're in safe hands. Generally, the thought I had was, oh my God, that's so good Dave's taking the reins here. Taking the reins to dog the boys. So the way this works is for the newcomers. One of the three of us goes away and learns about a topic

that's been suggested by one of the people listening or otherwise, and then we come back with the knowledge that we have gained in report form and say it back to the other two. And then to get us onto the topic that we're going to talk about, it normally isn't this concise. And to get it onto the topic that we're getting it on to in the end, And the report giver will ask a question. And that question will be asked tonight by the report giver Jess.

Jess, what is your question? Wow. I'm afraid that's all we have time for. That was good, that was good. Okay, my question... I remember why I'm here now. Sorry, Jess has a question, sorry. My question is,

which early 2000s controversy involved both Milburn Moneybags and Ronald McDonald? Oh, the monopoly thing. Yes. Yeah, that's enough, really. It's called a monopoly thing? Yeah. Are you suggesting a snappier title?

No. What was the first guy's name? Milburn Moneybags. Penny bags, I think his name is actually. That's the Monopoly Man. The Monopoly Man. Penny bags. So normally what we would do is Dave and I normally have some sort of

attempts at Joe cancers. Oh, fuck that. up to him. I accidentally got it right. What are you doing? I had like 50 great answers ready to go. All he really said was a monopoly thing, Dave. Do you have a guess? Okay. Do go

on McDonald's Monopoly Heist. Yeah, that is correct, Dave. Very good. Pretty good. Very good, Dave. Good guess. Thank you. Did anybody else have Does anybody heard of this, of this event that happened a little while ago?

Has anybody not heard of it? Thank God, thank God. Yeah. Yeah, we all know this one next. Otherwise, there was going to be a lot of live. Actually? I've memorized that Wikipedia page, so... I think you'll find, and I was going to start a brawl.

But luckily, there's a few people who haven't, so let's get stuck in. Is that what we do here? Yes, I'm excited. Okay. Love it. Thank you so much. If you get a shout compliments. Yeah.

So if you're on compliments for the night, preferably not about like hair and what I'm wearing because it's not my value. If you could direct those this way, that'd be really good. Seriously. I'll take them too. But I must be clear, I will not. Oh, thank you.

Shouts great, thank you. Got little toucans on it. Are they two cans? They are. That's his drinking ability. Got him, got him. Oh yeah? Sip, sip, sip, sip.

Oh, that's going to be a long night. Okay. In the early 2000s, the Jacksonville Florida FBI office had a reputation for being a fairly quiet branch. Bit of a sleepy hollow was a good place for FBI agents to work just before retirement. In fact, a lot of their work was to do with investigating white-collar crime, bank fraud, health care fraud, corruption. Nothing that exciting.

Or was it? Stick to the script, Jess. I feel an X-file coming on. Special Agent Doug Matthews, a young, fresh agent new to the team, was partnered with legendary agent, Rick Dent. Good name. Rick Dent.

I want to call him Dick Dent. If I was him, not you, him. If you were him, you would insist on being referred to as dick dent. That makes sense. I'm going to insist on it anyone. You reckon?

Yeah. That's a beautiful man. For a boy or girl. Just gorgeous. Yeah, so the two were a bit of a... They were a real odd couple. Matthews was young, gung-ho, energetic and enthusiastic, always looking for something fun and interesting and was feeling a little restless investigating healthcare fraud,

which he described as important but boring. Dent was a straight down the line Serious Matter of Fact man who Matthews described as having as much personality as this table he gestured to a table at a time But that table

had quite a lot of personality Yeah, it was a bold table Very charismatic table I'd fuck that table I would fuck that table And then I would join its cult Oh yeah You know what I mean?

That charismatic Let's get either end of that table And fuck us brains out Do you want to? I don't. I thought we're under something there. He thought it's so wrong. Matt, you seem to look back there

to see if there was a table. Let's have some fun. Do you go on up late? Let's give it a go right now. We don't normally do this at night, do we? No, this is exciting. Yeah. It's electric.

Rarely talk about how we love to fuck tables. They don't usually show that. side of ourselves. When the sun's up, I rarely let people in on how I like to get furniture in and around me. Okay, that was, yeah. I felt like I was nudging towards the line

and I think I found it. They let you know where it was, yeah. There it is, so we'll stick on from now on. We'll attempt to stick on this side of it. When was the line again? Matthews one day noticed a note on Dent's desk that said, McDonald's Monopoly fraud? Matthews, always on the hut for something shiny and more interesting to do,

asked Dent what the note was. Dent said a person had called in and said the McDonald's Monopoly game, which had been running since 1987, was rigged. Matthews, Board of Healthcare Fraud, was keen to dig a little deeper and see if there was anything to this tip. So Dent humoured his young partner and said, yeah, go for it, whatever. So Matthews calls the source, the person who'd called in and given this tip, and digs around a little bit,

tells him three names of previous million dollar winners of the Monopoly game and says, I know it's reeked because these three people are related. See, they can really read what they're supposed to do. You guys just stare at me blankly. I'm thinking, what a lucky family.

It's amazing, isn't it? What are the chances? Incredibly slim. It does sound like a jaded person hasn't won at the McDonald's Monopoly game and they've called up the FBI. How are they doing it?

I had hot cakes every day for a month and I didn't win anything. Not even free hotcakes. So the chances of winning the million dollar piece are already incredibly slim. The chance of three family members winning that impossible.

So the FBI think maybe this is worth looking into a little more. So after a little bit more digging, they quickly discovered that it was far more than just three winners who were linked. It was just about all them. The source also told Special Agent Matthews that the person behind the fraud was someone known as Uncle Jerry. Woo!

Well, hello, I'm Uncle Jerry and I'm here to collect the million dollar prize. It's the weirdest name. Yeah, it's not a good ringleader name. Yeah, but you then again want to be called Dick Dent, so... That's a better name than Uncle Jerry if you're going to commit fraud. Dick Dent. Dent. Yeah.

All right. So out of the millions of dollars in prizes over a decade of McDonald's monopoly, how much of it was won fraudulently? Who was Uncle Jerry? Was this an inside job? Trying to get a bit of suspense.

Wow. You think he might be Uncle Jerry McDonald's. Is that possible? You didn't say the family name. Are they all McDonald's? I think I've blown this quite open. Much like I did at the table. There it is.

regret face I don't know where the cameras are but I tried to look down the barrel of one there's one be great if I told you there are no cameras why there haven't been cameras around here

he's always pulling faces for the cameras he's like you know Vinnie filming and we're like Vinnie dies what are you talking about I saw him just before Vinnie's not here mate let him go Vinny's very much alive

for now Are you alive Are you alive Vinny? Might just keep checking in then So Uncle Jerry's won the lot No He's like behind it all Dave just

I mean I'll fucking get to it I mean you asked a lot of questions I know and you were just trying to get me back on to the topic and I'm still going to tell you to go fuck yourself So they started to look into how someone could get their hands on all the winning game pieces. The cups, fries boxes and all the packaging was made in factories with hundreds of staff members,

delivered by drivers to stores all over the country with hundreds of McDonald's, thousands of McDonald's staff members. So there's like an endless number of people who it could be. So the FBI decided they needed someone on the inside. Ronald. Or grimace. I always knew he was a snitch. But not the hamburger.

You can't trust the hamburger. What are you crazy? What was a bird one? Was there a bird? Birdie. Birdie. I forgot birdie. From bird.

It's been a long time, you guys. What was the grimacy one's name again? Oh, it's grimacing. So, yeah, they need someone on the inside. They set up a meeting with McDonald's, running the risk that it was. someone on the inside that was committing the fraud and then them setting up a meeting's probably going to

let them in on it. They set it up with like the manager of a store and it's like some 16 year old. Hi, how can I help you? Listen to here, kid. We know about Uncle Jerry. What? So they're keeping it as hush as possible.

They met with McDonald's Director of Global Security Rob Holm and a couple of other McDonald's head honchos. It became pretty apparent quite quickly the McDonald's had nothing to do with it, which I'm guessing is when they all went, what? Which is exactly what a guilty person would say. And they were very distressed to hear that their promotional game had been tampered with.

And as it turned out, a new monopoly game was about to start. It happened a couple of times a year, and they're about to kick off a brand new game. So the FBI viewed it as a chance to be proactive and essentially catch Uncle Jerry red-handed. McDonald's were a little hesitant, having struggled recently through the panic around mad cow disease in beef, So they've taken a bit of a hit. And they were worried that... Oh no. We're just about to launch the cow-themed monopoly.

This is terrible timing. I walked past an Australia post yesterday, and they had an Australia... I'm looking forward to how this comes back to bad cow. And they would not sell me any stamps. No, they... They have an Australian... Get out of here.

Shoo! Get out of here. for the last time. No, they had an Australia Post-themed monopoly and I cannot tell you how many were stacked up in the window. It was like... Dave, they just got a fresh shipment.

It was sad. Because of demand. That's cute. Did you get some? Oh yeah. Check under your seats. So they're worried then if the word gets out to the public that the game is corrupt,

that's going to damage their reputation even more. So they're a little nervous about it. Rob Holm, the director of Global Security McDonald's, says that the decision wasn't one that they made lightly, but that ultimately they owed it to the customers to do the right thing to run the game one more time. And then every year until current day. It's so crazy, it just might be able to.

Yeah, so brave, so brave. So McDonald's had to explain to the FBI exactly how their monopoly game worked. But they're a fast food restaurant, if any of you aren't sure. So they outsourced the handling of the game to a marketing company creatively called Simon Marketing. That is nominative

determinism, if I've ever heard of it. Too clever for you. Yeah, too clever. Sometimes I say stuff too clever for even you. Did I say the thing, right? Yeah, that's right. Hello, I'm Simon Marketing. I'll be in charge of all your marketing.

All right, how about a fuck another table? I hate them. Me too. I hate them. I love you. I love you all. So, I just want to quickly recap, so you said that, like, McDonald's, they've asked how the game works, and McDonald's are like, well... We don't know.

I don't know. Yeah. Like, who here knows how Monopoly works, really? No. Who's ever finished a game of Monopoly? No. You play for six... Without king hitting a sibling.

Six or seven hours. someone's got all the money everyone else has no money and you're like fuck you dad for example I just got a report to do McDonald's and Simon Marketing have been working together for a very long time

Simon Marketing that's like nominative determinism going mad I'll get on board eventually just say it enough times If everyone could just Google Nomitive Determinism There is, you know how I go straight to,

too dumb to get it, not, not a very good joke. It couldn't be that. Couldn't possibly be. Yeah, so they've been working together a long time. In fact, Simon Marketing were behind the introduction of the Happy Meal. Wow. That's genuinely impressive.

A lot of fans of happy meals in the house. That was, that we can't top that you said something that made a whole crowd go wow would that be a career highlight for us? What a moment? Wow

I'm my hairs on the You got hairs on your eye They just turned up I shaved two hours ago I'm losing control of tonight Yeah she's right You never had it Anyway

So of course that means if not only McDonald's is involved, Simon Marketing is involved, it's even more people that are involved. Don't say anything about Simon Marketing. I know that fucking face. And to complicate it even further, the actual game pieces were printed by a different company again called Dittler Brothers.

Oh, that's not nice, is it? Dittler Brothers. Dittler your brother. No, thank you. No, thank you. He's a married man. Everyone's me, I would have called him Dick Dittler. brothers.

That's just me. I didn't understand what he meant before. I just thought the joke was he put dick at the front. Very funny to me as well because Matt is just sitting in the dark by himself. Vinny spent so long trying to get the lights right

and then you're just sitting in the dark making these jokes and then hating yourself. Did you guys know that Matt's also here? All right You're just a voice So Dittler brothers They're the ones that print the game pieces But they also print like US stamps

And stuff like that So it's like a secure company I wasn't allowed any stamps Do you not get Dave start on the stamps? I want to send a letter To your supervisor Dave were you wearing pants Absolutely not

It was a Sunday It was today He's no pants day. Oh my god. So the Monopoly games up and running, the FBI gets a call for McDonald's that says a man named Michael Hoover has claimed a prize. He'd found the million dollar piece.

Now I'm laughing at everyone's names. That's a funny name. Hoover. It sucks. Yeah. I don't want to encourage it, but I'm not discouraging it. So Michael Hoover, who's found the million dollar piece. Special Agent Matthews, who was always suggesting an undercover operation,

he would essentially walk into meetings and go, undercover? And they'd go, fuck off Matthews, he'd go, all right. Doing a lunch run. We're doing an undercover? Undercover? Who's for undercover? He just kept suggesting it. So this time he pipes up and he says that they should shoot fake TV commercials with the winners under the guise of celebrating the win, getting other people to play,

but also interviewing the people without bringing them into the FBI office, which would probably tip some people off. Right. I mean, when you said we should shoot people, I was a bit worried. How about we shoot them? But we're undercover. I'll play a hitman.

Perfect crime. I'll play a hitman. No, that's great, pretty. Fake commercial. And that's exactly what that is. And the camera's always rolling in case they confess. Exactly right. So he keeps suggesting undercover

and they're all like, come on. It's actually a very good idea. Yeah. So he would pose as the director, and they got a couple of other agents to pose as film crew, but they needed someone for McDonald's to work with them as well. Enter Amy Murray. She'd been with McDonald's for a few years,

but had only been working on the Monopoly promotion for about six months, and she was in the communications department, and part of her role was coordinating with winners of the game. So she seemed like the perfect fit to help them out with this. So Shamrock Productions, which is the name they gave their fake production company. It's not bad. It's pretty bad.

went to visit Michael Hoover to film his story on how he won. He told a whole story about falling asleep at the beach, waking up and being covered in sand because the wind had picked up. So he went down to the water to get the sand off. And whoopsie, Daisy, he dropped his People magazine in the water.

Water clutz. What was he reading on the beach? People magazine. I think it's a different magazine in America. Okay. I had a wank at the beach. I fell asleep. In America, I think it's just like a Who magazine

and over here it's whatever you read. Thank you. I subscribe, I know. I didn't I subscribe. I really thought that was an old man thing to get, but you were right on it. People magazine, classic. I've heard.

What a shit name for a gross magazine? Keep it vague. It's like it's nomative determinism. They'd get a reaction like I'd said something offensive. And that felt right. offensive to good humor, but who's editing this week's? There will be no edits. This will be baffling for the listener there.

Oh yeah. The live shows always are. Then they go, can we not have live shows? And we go, nah. And then COVID. Yeah, was that an inside job from one of the listeners? Yeah, could have been. Stopping this live podcast. We are the biggest victims here.

Please do go on. So Michael Hoover's dropped his magazine. He's dropped his porn magazine. He dropped his porn. He goes to the car, drives home, decides to get some dinner. So he stops at a supermarket. And while he's getting some stuff, he thinks to himself, you know what, I didn't even get to read that People magazine.

So he buys a new one. He goes home, he's having to leave through it. Would you believe a million dollar piece inside the magazine? This sounds like he's done COVID tracing. Everywhere he went. And so can you get a McDonald's Monopoly piece? Yeah, they were in magazines. apparently you could just go up to someone at McDonald's and say,

can I have a game piece please? Because otherwise it would be gambling, so they just give you a free piece every now and then. Baffling. What are you talking about? Generally, I've lost the plot of this story. What's the people magazine? Why is there a magazine at the beach?

The monopoly pieces that you collect were in magazines. Uh-huh. and he found one. They're filming a fake commercial with him to try and catch him out and he's got this crazy story. You know what? Just smile and nod for the rest of that. Good job. But meanwhile, so the FBI are like,

oh, this is definitely bullshit. So they tap his phone. And while they didn't quite get a phone call with Uncle Jerry, they weren't quite that lucky. They did catch another phone call between him and another man named A.J. Glum That's a good one. I would have called him Dick Glum.

Looking at the cameras again? I don't know. Sorry. So he's basically bragging on the phone about how well he did in the interview and how stupid the crew were because they believed every word of his made-up story. So the FBI were like, okay, so yeah,

we're definitely on to something. But they still don't know how many people were involved, how wide this scam went, who's leading it. So they took the phone records of previous winners and analysed them to see if there were any common phone numbers that all of them had been in contact with, which is a bit of a bit of a stretch, but it paid off. Uncle Jerry.

All these winners had had phone calls with one person. Jerome Jacobson, also known as Jerry Jacobson. Oh. The head of security at Simon Marketing. No. Well, Matt, I think you know what this means. Yeah, I would have called him Dick Jerry. Is that what you meant?

Absolutely. Nailed it. Jerry Jacobson was a former police officer who left the force after a diagnosis with a rare neurological disorder and he and his wife, Marsha, moved to Atlanta, Georgia in 1981 where he got work as a mechanic and she worked as a security auditor

for the accounting firm, yuck, Arthur Young. You're not an accountant, are you? Sorry. Oh, you hesitated. Anyway, so she's working as an auditor and she was assigned to one of their clients. Dittler brothers. I've heard of them.

They wouldn't sell you any stamps. Yeah. Just print as a fucking stand. Preachers one stamp. She got a job for her husband as well at the company, but by 1983 they'd divorced and Jacobson started to climb the ranks until he oversaw all production

for Dittler's client. that's weird for their client Simon Marketing I have must have copied I've pasted in a sentence where it shouldn't be but he's overseeing Simon Marketing while working for Dittler Brothers

and he ends up going and working for Simon Marketing as well they poach him but anyway this is a this next bit from a really great article from The Daily Beast says when Jacobson march through the printing work with his slicked back hair and a little paunch that overhung his belt.

He looked every part, the ex-cop. He was quick with a joke, but commanded respect for his hard work and obsession with loss prevention. What a fun guy for a dinner party. He inspected workers' shoes to check they weren't stealing McDonald's game pieces. They're for me.

I'm a steal. But yeah, anyway, his attention to detail and police credentials meant that Simon Marketing poached him in 1988. so now he's working directly for them. So the Monopoly promotion was run a couple of times a year and it was a massive process

to get the game going. Dittler Brothers would work 24-7 for three months to print half a billion game pieces. Laid end to end, the paper tickets would stretch from New York to Sydney. It's a fun visual.

That's quite a long way. That helps me understand how many there are. Yeah. It's a lot. Quite a few. Yeah, heaps, I'd say. Bloody hell.

The high value winning pieces were marked with watermark code and examined under blue light when people claimed the prize To be sure they're not Because yeah Part of the fine print is you do actually have to jizz on the piece first Well have you got People magazine, yeah Explains a lot It checks out, it checks out for this guy

It does, yeah The pieces are then locked in a vault guarded by coded keypads and a dual entry combination lock Dual entry Yeah Like that table So thanks so much for coming to your first show Is this how they explained it to you?

Yeah Yeah I got a well done from the first time Well done You keep at it You keep at it You look like you're having fun It's the main thing

That's the important thing So there is someone out there Who's going home and I'd be like Honey You know what I've got a promotion of the bank I've been put in charge of something very precious at the vault. I am protecting the winning game piece from the Monopoly McDonald's. And his wife says I want a divorce.

And there's dual interest. Stop talking about it at dinner parties. We have to put our keys in at the same time and say three, two, one, turn. And Darren always turns a millisecond too late and we have to start all over again. Fucking Darren. Fucking Darren. Anyway, so then Jeremyson, Jerry Jacobson took the high value pieces, placed them in envelopes and sealed them with tamper-proof metallic stick.

tamper-proof. That's fun to say. He then had the job of flying all over the country to various McDonald's packaging factories to distribute the pieces. All of this was overseen by an independent auditor who travelled with Jerry and the briefcase they used to transport the pieces was combination locked as well, with each side having a different code. Jerry had one, the auditor had the other. So it seems pretty difficult to somehow steal the pieces. So maybe it wasn't Jerry Jacobson. Nah, totally was. But I had you for a sec. You don't speak for everyone, shut up.

Nah. Yeah, you're fun of parties too. Nah. Try again. Not impressed. I don't care, I've got your money. Honestly, Jess, she spoke for me. Nah.

Nah. I loved it. You have no idea what's going on. I love the nah. No one wants to put their hand up. Cowards. You know I'll bash you. I don't understand that reference.

Yeah, all the good stuff happens when you're not there. Anyway... So I've done one good episode. That's why it was last week's episode. That's why it's wild they're here. What do you do? Anyway, in the mini-series, McMillians, very good series, Jacobson's lawyer explains that somehow, by chance,

Jerry Jacobson once received a parcel in the mail at work mistakenly sent to him from a supplier in Hong Kong which contained those tamper-proof metallic stickers. He just got sent some of those stickers. Without that, he would never have been able to pull it off. I'd say that as a sign of God. To steal millions of dollars? Yeah.

And that's why I'm banned from the post office. That seems reasonable. This meant that once Jerry had sneakily watched the order to enter her code into the briefcase, he could just go to the men's bathroom where she couldn't follow him, swap the high value pieces for some spare low value pieces

that he'd swiped and then put a new sticker on it and everything was dandy. So he'd just pocket the real ones. But when he takes that sort of briefcase into the bathroom? Yeah. And say, I need to take this in there.

I don't trust you. I love you. This is where I keep my people magazines. I love the vagueness of that of a magazine with nude pictures. Yeah, you know what? I'm into people. I think it's beautiful.

I've had people so hot. Yeah, it's so hot. Nude people are the best. It's really inclusive. It's nice. Yeah, it's beautiful. Beautiful. Well, I mean, it's inclusive to a point.

What about animals? What about dogs? Okay, I found that line again. Would have made more sense if I said tables, that would have been. Can I have that one again? I think that might have been the best of the night if I'd not fucked it up. If you got it. If you got it.

That's me. Always. a couple of seconds away from being real smart. So he starts kind of small. One day in 1989 at a family gathering in Miami, Jacobson slipped his stepbrother, Marvin Braun, fucking hell good names, a game piece worth $25,000.

Jacobson later admitted, I don't know if I just wanted to show him I could do something. Or bragging. No, don't pity him. That is one of the saddest things. So, that's for you. I'm not a loser. I'm not a loser.

Stop telling mum, I'm a loser. Not long after, his local butcher heard that Jerry was in charge of the prizes and said he wanted a winning piece as well. Jerry said, yeah, sure, I can make that happen. But it looks suss because we know each other. Because that's on record. People know who your butcher is. So the butcher gets a distant friend involved to be the one to claim the prize,

and they pay Jerry two grand for the stolen piece. This is basically how he makes his money over the next decade. Just like selling the tickets or getting kickbacks. So then he ups the stake, and he stole a $1 million instant win game piece and locked it in a safety deposit box. Someone who came into Jerry's life and industrialized the monopoly scam was someone that he met purely by chance. Jacobson was sitting in Atlanta airport one day in 1995

when a man sat down next to him. That man was Gennaro Colombo of the influence. infamous Colombo crime family in New York. Oh my God, that sounds like a made-up name. Well, by the way, Gennaro goes by Jerry. Now there's two jerrys. Oh, my God. So the two juries get chatting.

From that article again, it says, When Jacobson revealed that he worked in promotional gaming, Colombo was intrigued. He enjoyed finding new ways to cheat a system. When Charleston County in Georgia passed new laws restricting where strip clubs could be operated, Colombo changed his strip club called Fuzzy Bunnies into the church of Fuzzy Bunnies

said I want them to read the Bible for two hours every night and then we'll drink and let the girls dance Get on your knees, let's pray Oh I didn't even think of the double meaning there I didn't even That was you, that wasn't me That was not me What a weird first impression I've made on you tonight

It's not normally like this Is it? It absolutely is. Usually we sit and listen. Please. Very nicely. So they decided they're going to work together. By November of the same year, Jerry Jacobson had slipped Columbo the winning piece of a brand new Dodge Viper.

Soon, Colombo was traveling around visiting friends who would amazingly win a million dollars, not long after. It's crazy. It was the wildest thing. That could be a coincidence, Jess. Absolutely not a coincidence. It's not a coincidence. Because in 1996, Columbo's father-in-law, William Fisher,

can you believe it he won a million dollars? It's just, I know. I would have called him. Dick Fisher. That one felt good. Would you say no, it's not? That was so good. I mean, you said it in a tone that may think,

without hearing the word you said, I assumed you hated it. But I love that. You were able to say something positive in such a negative tone. That was great. Genuinely love that. Great work. Really good stuff. So many times I've wanted to walk off this station.

If you hate me, I hate myself more, okay? Just know that. Oh, please, no pity. Please. That's only making it worse. No, you're okay. You're okay. That feels right.

Dave, can you tell me to go on, please? Please do go on. Thank you. Please. So this is kind of... This is how it would work. People would give Columbo a down payment. He would give them a winning piece.

They would create elaborate backstories for themselves and fake addresses in different states. So it didn't look suss that they all lived in the one place. Well, they're always wanking on a beach. Always, yeah, yeah. I just didn't want to... I thought that was a bit rude. Yeah. Not for me.

I should have seen what I was doing at post office Matt, help me out of you Guys, this report is actually really long Really? Oh my god, sorry, I thought we were padding If you could just shut the fuck up Great, great, great, great Happy to not talk for the next 15 to 20 Don't completely shut up

Okay, I'll just go Just shut up a little bit Great, fantastic So these people would then claim the winning prizes And then send kickbacks In a little more from you as well if you don't mind You breathe? Fuck me.

This is our job. That's dumb. Is that what do you think of this as? A job? This is a passion thing for me. I'm absolutely in this for the money. Are you kidding me? And we are rolling in it.

There's 50-50 right here. This guy. Yeah. That's our intern. The worst. Terrible businessman. Does not know what he's worth. Did you enjoy your beer?

That a yummy beer, yeah? Ooh, yummy. All right, I'm probably going to have to edit some stuff. Sorry, sorry, please too go on. Thank you so much. I'm just going to... Yeah, anyway, they get some cash out of it. We're all good? Great.

So I don't have time to go into all the stories. There are a lot of people involved in this. But one of the stories kind of paints a picture of how complicated and widespread it is. So in April of 2000, Uncle Jerry took a drive with a friend of his, a man named Dwight, Baker. He was a well-respected member of the local. That would have been a good one. That would have been a good one.

I mean, I probably don't need to say, but that would have been a good one. I winked at the camera. There is no camera. I cannot stress enough. There is no camera. There is no camera, let alone three of them. Well, I winked at the back wall. You're going to fuck that wall? The way it's looking at me. I really just... There can't be long to go, can there?

If you shut up, no. No, I'm kidding. There's actually quite a while. Oh my God. No, no, no, we're fine. We're good for time? We're fine. I've got a time on here.

Fantastic. Does anyone have anywhere to be? You don't come to a do-go-on show and make plans afterwards. Do you know who's running our tail? lives in a regional area. He said that to me before. And I didn't realize why until now.

I live in a region. I have a very comfortable couch you can crash on. Because we're going all night. Oh, that sounded creepy. Why don't you lick him out? Oh, that's a reference to a previous episode. Just so you know. Just so you know.

That does have context. Believe it or not. The Storm Trooper Man is doing a real... really firm arm cross now. My mother-in-law is here. I'm having fun. All right. Let's just recap where we are.

He's gone for a drive with Dwight Baker. Dick Baker. Dick Baker. Dick Baker, well-respected member of the local Mormon church, a devoted father of five, who lived in a split-level house next to Hayfields and farmland. I don't know why they included that,

but I like it. By they, I mean me. He was a property developer. He'd been trying to build a resort and a championship golf course, but he couldn't attract enough investors. On top of that, Dwight had had an accident in his tractor that spring and severely damaged his spine. Hearing of his friends, misfortune, Uncle Jerry,

told him about the monopoly promotion. Dwight was initially hesitant, but he was owing 30K in back taxes and had started to have to sell off parcels of his land. So he was pretty desperate for cash. So he had a spinal injury and now back taxes. Geez. That's a tough, right?

That is tough. So, I mean, part of the job of sitting on the site, like you see little connections and you go, is that anything? And it turns out often, no, it is not. But we have fun along the way. The real winner is friendship. Yeah.

And you better believe after the show I'm going to ask, was that a pun? So Jerry can make all of that trouble go away For the low low price of $100,000 His biggest kickback yet But it couldn't be Dwight who claimed the prize The link was too close between the two men And it had to be someone Dwight could trust

But had a different name to him So he spoke to George Chandler Who was 30 at the time And it had been Dwight's foster son Since George was a teenager Dwight showed George the winning game piece In a tiny Ziploc bag And offered to sell it to him for $100,000

Dwight explained that the winner was going, the winner, the real winner, not me, someone I know, a friend of mine, he's going through a messy divorce and he doesn't want to split the McDonald's winnings with his soon-to-be ex-wife. Taylor's oldest time. So Dwight helped George fill in the claim form,

send it off, but he warned him not to participate in any promotions about the Monopoly game, like TV ads or anything like that. Right. But on June 26, Dwight's phone rang, and George said, oh, you need to be up here at South Union McDonald's at 11

because McDonald's is presenting me with a big check. And Dwight's like, maybe you don't, maybe don't do that. And George's like that'll be fun, big check! You never mentioned anything about a big check. Yeah, I love big checks. So, yeah, Dwight Baker, he arrives

at the McDonald's. Two TV news crews were filming Ronald McDonald's, the real one. What? I know. Showering George with confetti. And he's like, fuck. off, Ronald. You big Perth? Get out of here. Perth. Follow me around. Peirf. Big shoes.

Your big shoes. Jesus Christ. You know what they say about girls of big shoes. Big Perth. Yeah, that's true. There's a size eight. That's absolutely true. He's so small. So that footage, that TV footage, found its way to the FBI field office in Jacksonville. So after a massive effort from the FBI, including a lot of wiretapping, following people,

searching phone records, undercover operations, the Monopoly game was wrapping up, and so they had to kind of move. They had enough evidence to make some arrests. The Jacksonville branch were going to need the help of other branches in order to make the arrest because the scam was spread out across a few different states. So they put together all the info the arresting officers would need,

and they sent it via fax. However, someone, although in the doco, no one will take blame for it, faxed it to Greenville FBI or so they thought in actual fact they had faxed it to the Greenville news and just given the journalists

every piece of info they had on this very hush-hush case the agents meant they tell a story in the documentary of like getting in the little Sessna plane flying there overnight and turning up on the door the next day and not bribing them or anything definitely not bribing them

they didn't bribe them Idiot I want a dummy I was clearly joking It's just a really funny fuck up I felt the need to share So they managed to keep the story

hush-hush for a little bit longer August 22nd 2001 The FBI fanned out And made eight arrests Including Dwight and Linda Baker And Michael Hoover And in a pre-dawn raid FBI agents surrounded

Jerry Jacobson's red brick home crept up the garden path and knocked on his door. You-hoo! He'll never see it coming. Pre-dawn, you'd be a bit bloody shocked someone's knocking on your door. Let me tell you that. I'd be saying, you'd get out of here, thanks very much.

So a shock to Jacobson was taken away in handcuffs and charged with conspiracy to commit mail fraud. His bond set at a staggering $1 million. So that's how they got him. I've got a little playing piece that'll get me out of this fine. That's right. I've got a little get out of jail free coming. Thank you.

Thank you. Also, let me tell you about the time I won third prize in a beauty contest. Okay. So that was it. It was over. Jerry Jacobson's 12-year scam was busted. So is he Uncle Jerry?

He is Uncle Jerry. I was just doing a little bit of a ooh, but it was definitely here. He's the Uncle Jerry. Well, got us. I got you, Dave. Everybody else was on board. Got me.

With each of Jacobson's nine charges carrying a five-year penalty, investigators warned him he'd be 104 on his release date. In exchange for a signed confession and his testimony in court, Jacobson pleaded guilty to three counts for a total of 15 years, and the government took everything he owned. McDonald's CEO Jack Greenberg told the country in a television address that the company had immediately terminated its relationship with Simon Marketing. Oh, poor Simon.

Well, yeah, because the McDonald's account was about 98% of their business. So overnight, the entire place is shut down. So because of him, hundreds of people lost their jobs. This is exactly how a game of monopoly ends, isn't it? When you land on Mayfair and you're bartering, you're like, all right, I'll give you this. I'll give you, take everything. And you're like, one roll of the dice, I get 200 passing go, there's nowhere, you're fucked, you're fucked. You're fucked.

So more than... So you've played Monopoly until the end. Oh yeah. I've never done that. Or patience. Or stupidity. So of the 50 defendants that were convicted of male fraud and conspiracy, most received only probation and are still paying back their prize money,

like just in installments every month, four winners, including Dwight Baker's foster son, George Chandler, had their conviction overturned by an appeals court, which agreed they were duped because he had no idea. He thought it was a divorcee. Yeah, he was still like being a little bit dodgy, but he didn't have the full information. So Jerry Jacobson admitted to stealing as many as many as 60 game pieces

over a dozen years, totaling over $24 million in prizes. The judge sent him to jail for 37 months. He did not pass go. Yes! Just a little peek behind the curtain. Before we started, Jess goes, I'm going to finish with a joke. And you and Dave are going to say it all night before and fuck it up.

But turns out I was not smart enough to do that. Dave did it just before. And I went, oh, that's clever. But that is my report on the McDonald's Monopoly Heist. Honestly, it's been a lot of fun. Thank you so much for coming out. And coming to our first live one of these in so-so-long. It really is a privilege to be able to talk to people.

Yeah, we were trying to figure out. Our last one was like... In maybe Birmingham, like 16 or 17. Yeah, amazing. So it's so nice to be back here. Thanks so much. I was actually trying to be sincere. I really enjoy being on stage here tonight.

And I just want to thank everyone for allowing us to make this happen. And, yeah. Ladies gentlemen, Matt Stewart. He's not coming back. But honestly, thank you so much for coming out. We absolutely love you so much. We'd like to give a big round of applause to Carl Chan and the European Beer Cafe for having us.

Thank you so much. We've got Andrew Doody Dootson on the sound. Thank you, Dini. Vinnie Chen on the cameras that really are there. They're not made up. We've been Dugo. Thank you so much to see you next time. Goodbye.

If I do say so myself, a cracking episode. and you're back in the room and by the room I mean in my study my very echoey study at my house I'm determined to not not edit like I'm not going to edit this at all I'm not going to stop and start sometimes when I start to do this stuff by myself

I just I'm like oh God you're making no sense you idiot and I'd stop and start again I'm not doing it it's late at night I can't be stuffed I got a lot on at the moment I'm a little stressed So anyway, hello, Jess here And this brings us to everybody's favorite part of the show Where we like to thank a few of our patrons

And we do a few, honestly, too many different segments here The first, of course, is everyone's favorite It's called Fact Quote or Question I believe it has a little jingle There's something like this, fact quote or question He always remembers the ding Okay, I'm going to do a few of these It's always a bit weird by myself

I do apologize if anybody really wanted an answer from Matt or Dave and is not getting it. I know that can be very frustrating or disappointing. I know I'm a massive disappointment is what I'm saying. Okay, so without further ado, our first quote comes from Julian Barnes. Julian's given himself the title of, I'm hungry. Me too, I guess. I just had dinner. but I'm always thinking about what I can eat next.

So Julian, I'm hungry, he's given us a quote, says, Hey guys, so looking forward to your upcoming live shows. Thank you so much. They're happening right now. We just heard one then. Do you hear that truck go by my house just then? The following is a quote from Terry Pratchett's book, Hat Full of Sky, and it reminds me of how excited I am to get back out

into the wide world soon. So this is a quote, Why do you go away so that you can come back, so that you can see the place you came from with new eyes and extra colours. And the people there see you differently too. Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving. Oof, that's really nice. I haven't read a lot of Terry Pratchett stuff.

But that's lovely. What a nice quote. I think that's very true. Come back to where you're from and you see it a little differently. Lovely. Thank you so much, Julian. I hope between writing that and me reading it just now, I hope you've eaten something.

And if not, for the love of God, please go eat something. Okay, next we have Gary Jay from the UK. Gary's giving himself a new title. It's called Chick-Sexer, someone who determines the sex of chickens. What fun. What fun, Gary. I'm guessing that's you telling us about a new job you have. And congratulations.

Fantastic. A question from Gary, when you were young, Who was your favorite neighbor's character? And why was it Joe Mangel? I never watched Neighbors, so I probably just mangled that name. You wrote, when I was young, he was, he's what an Australian was to me.

Him, Crocodile Dundee and Shane Worn. It's not far off, to be honest. Yeah, I never really watched Neighbors. Tody, I guess. A lot of my actor friends have had very small parts on Neighbors, so I would say all of them. collectively. Yeah, I don't know that I want to get into neighbours now.

I feel like it's something you have to have watched as a child into your early teens. I don't know many people who watch it anymore, but it's still going. So obviously there's a lot of people. I'm just not one of them. So that's a huge, obviously, disappointment for you. Apologies. But thank you for letting us know. thank you for answering your own question.

We love it when people do that. And congratulations on the new job as Chick-Sexa. We also have from Michael Derritsy, who's given himself the title, Dolly Parton's Roady. Oh my God, dream job. And Michael has given us a fact. Says, Patron's Sane of the Pod,

Dolly Parton, recently got a COVID vaccine shot that she helped to fund. Yeah, crazy. She also did a little rewrite of one of her songs to help promote. it. She's so delightful and wholesome and my country doesn't deserve her. No, Michael, the world doesn't deserve her. She's truly incredible. You've also sent a YouTube link, which I can put that in the show notes if I remember. I'll be doing that in the next like 10 minutes, but I'll probably

forget. Also says, P.S. I hope this link works. If not, you three could probably just Google Dolly Parton Vaccine Song. There you go. That's a note for everybody, really. Dolly Parton vaccine song. No worries if it doesn't work and you decide not to mess a with it while recording. Michael, it's like you get me. PPS, at the time of writing this, I have an appointment to get my first dose COVID shot. By the time you read this, I'll hopefully have gotten my second dose. Wonderful. Congratulations. Big news. A little bit delayed here in Australia and obviously a bit of a tiered rollout. So the most, you know, most vulnerable getting it first, healthcare workers, first responders, you know, the people with immune diseases, disabilities,

etc. So hoping that I'll be able to get it soon too. Awesome. Thank you, Michael. Finally, from Matthew Bohr. He's given himself the title of Director of Do Go on Craft Services and Canadian Ambassador of Seal Clubbing. Okay, a bit of fun.

And Michael, Matthew has given himself, has asked. a question. She's struggling. Hi, I do go on, crew. One thing I've always appreciated about you all as a group is vocally, the podcast is always dynamic and fun. Thank you so much. It could just be the accents, but I feel you all bring a certain vocal, je ne se coie that makes the show great. This is making me blush just reading it. Question, if you could have a guest on the show for their voice and how it would add to the reports, who would it be and why? Oh, so like who has a good voice. And you've excluded Michael Cain, Adele and Sydney Shineberg as they are already on regularly. Yes, we already have them as

regular guests. We really should just put them on the on the like show description. You know, they're essentially co-hosts now. You say my pick is John Bailey, otherwise known as Epic Voice Guy from Honest Trailers. Oh yeah, it's got a great voice. Who's got a good voice? Morgan Freeman is a classic. He's the voice. I do like kind of like British Irish accents.

Oh, I was watching, oh, fuck. I was seeing clips of like a great celebrity bake-off, stand-up to cancer. Was it stand-up to cancer? Something like that. Dizzy rascals on there. He's never baked before, but he's actually crushing it. Like, he's so good.

And just the way he talks is actually a bit of fun. James McAvoy's on there, too. And it's like, oh, I could listen to him talk all day. So there's a couple of options, I guess. Or maybe like Kermit the Frog. I think that would add a fun dynamic. So there you go. I think that's pretty reasonable.

I'm just going to, like I said, I'm not, I refuse to edit any of this or stop and start again. So just a little peek behind the curtain. I'm just marking that I have answered those questions. Great. Done. Okay. Now, the next thing we like to do is thank a few of our patrons who support the show on the ass prod level. Oh yeah, if you ever want to submit a fact quote or question, you can absolutely do so. That is for our Sydney-Shaunberg Deluxe package, Patrions.

You get a newsletter, three bonus episodes, early access to tickets, and you get to submit a fact quote or a question. If you are an associate producer on the show, you also get to ask, you don't get to ask questions. You get a shout out. And that's what I'm going to do now. I'm going to give a few shoutouts to some people. And normally we come up with a little bit of a game. But, oh, okay, you know what? Because I'm here by myself, I'm just going to say how much money you fake one in the Monopoly game, the McDonald's Monopoly game.

I'm going to say that. Without further ado, I would love to thank from Sheffield in England, Joshua Roberts. Joshua Roberts, you actually won, illegitimately, $436, US, and 42 cents. So you can figure out what that would be in pounds. Yeah, so there you go. Joshua Roberts, I've already forgotten the amount. because I was making it up as I went. So I hope you were listening.

If not, hit that little rewind button a couple of times. I would also have to thank from Maurer in Queensland. Lisa Yao wins in Australian dollars, because you are from Queensland, actually pretty big, $250,000. You don't get to keep any of that, but like you spend it quickly. You go real flashy, cars, jewels.

It's all obviously taken off you once the FBI find you. But, God, for those few months, you're living like a goddamn queen. And that's what you deserve, Lisa. That's what you deserve. I would also love to thank from Westgate-on-Sea. Oh, that's fun in the UK. Thomas Williams. Thomas Williams won three-pound.

three pound you were not that impressed by it um which is understandable that is understandable but then you did use that three pound to go buy a cheeseburger uh to drown your sorrows and then on the wrapping of the cheeseburger you want a million pound once again did not get to keep it um but still pretty exciting so not bad um i would also love to thank i'll just do how many I've done there? That's three. I'll do, I'll do four. I would love to thank from, oh, what's this? Penticton, Penticton. That's confusing. In British Columbia, Canada, Matthew bore. Am I saying that right, Matthew? Penticton. Penticton. Oof. I don't know if I enjoy that. Maybe, maybe the way you say it sounds nicer, but Matthew Bohr, you win in Canadian dollars, $700,000. Huge, I know.

Massive. I'm proud of you. It's very exciting. And weirdly, actually, you do get to keep it. You get away with it. Nobody ever catches you. So, sorry I just said your name on a massive podcast, which the FBI frequently listened to for tip-offs. But yeah, it's just how I go, I guess.

Anyway, thank you to those of you who support the show. You can always do that at Patreon slash do go on pod. And it, you know, breaks it all down there nicely for you. So thank you so much. The last thing I would like to do, and I might need to fucking pause awkwardly for a second here because I didn't do it ahead of time, is see if there is anybody for the TripDitch Club this week.

having a bit of a look here, having a bit of a look here. I don't think there are any people for the TripTitch Club this week. If I've missed them, because I'm not good at the TripTage Club system, we will definitely do you next week. But from what I can see here, not sure that there are. So we're all good. Thank you so much for hanging around for this last part. I know it's a bit tedious when there's just one of us here.

But we really appreciate those of you who came out to see the live show. We really hope you enjoyed it. And also, I know some of you love, some of you hate the, not hate, but, you know, aren't big fans of listening to the live shows. We have filmed these as well. So they'll come out on our YouTube channel. Not too long. They won't be too far away.

So you can look forward to that as well. If you don't necessarily like listening, because there might be parts where you're like, what's happening, you can watch it, which is always a lot of fun. But also, we just really appreciate. you, I guess, kind of sticking with us because getting out and doing the live shows is really, really great for us. We love to do it. It means a lot to us. So it's so nice to be able to get back out there and perform for you again. But yeah, okay, I'm going to get out of here. I'm going to upload this straight away. And I will catch you next week for Matt's report,

I believe, will be next. Very exciting. But until that time, that magic. time, I will say goodbye, ladies, bye! Don't forget to sign up to our tour mailing list so we know where in the world you are and we can come and tell you when we're coming there. Wherever we go, we always hear six months later, oh, you should come to Manchester.

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