Two In The Think Tank - 346 - Ethel Livesey: Australia's Greatest Imposter

Episode Date: June 8, 2022

In Sydney 1945 Ethel Livesey was to marry Rex Beech. The press was dubbing it the society wedding of the year. But she wasn’t who she appeared to be. The truth was, she was Australia’s Greatest Imposter. This is the story of the Amazing Mrs Livesey!Read The Amazing Mrs Livesey by Freda Marnie Nicholls for the full storySupport the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: dogoonpod.com or patreon.com/DoGoOnPod Submit a topic idea directly to the hat: dogoonpod.com/suggest-a-topic/ Check out our new merch! : https://do-go-on-podcast.creator-spring.com/ Stream our 300th episode with extra quiz (and 16 other episodes with bonus content): https://sospresents.com/authors/dogoon Check out our AACTA nominated web series: http://bit.ly/DGOWebSeries​ Twitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: [e-mail] Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/ Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader Thomas REFERENCES AND FURTHER READING:The Amazing Mrs Livesey by Freda Marnie Nicholls - https://www.booktopia.com.au/the-amazing-mrs-livesey-freda-marnie-nicholls/book/9781760296193.htmlhttps://www.abc.net.au/radionational/programs/lifematters/mrs-ethel-livesey---australias-greatest-imposter/7315112https://www.britishpathe.com/video/ethel-livesey-tells-her-story Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Just jumping in really quickly at the start of today's episode to tell you about some upcoming opportunities to see us live in the flesh. And you can see us live at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival 2024. We are doing three live podcasts on Sundays at 3.30 at Basement Comedy Club, April 7, 14 and 21. You can get tickets at dogo1pod.com. Matt, you're also doing some shows around the country. That's right. I'm doing shows with Saren Jayamana, who's been on the show before. We're going to be in Perth in January, Adelaide in February, Melbourne through the festival in April, and then Brisbane after that. I'm also doing Who Knew It's in Perth and Adelaide. Details for all that stuff at mattstuartcomedy.com.

We can wait for clean water solutions. Or we can engineer access to clean water. We can acknowledge indigenous cultures. Or we can learn from indigenous voices. We can demand more from the earth. Or we can demand more from ourselves. At York University, we work together to create positive change for a better tomorrow. Join us at yorku.ca slash write the future. Hello and welcome to another episode of Do Go On.

My name is David Warnke and as always I'm here with Jess Perkins and Matt Stewart. Hello. Hello. I like it. You said hello. You said hello. It sounded like hello. And it reminds me of this documentary I watched a while ago about Nevermind, Nirvana, Nevermind.

And there was this like music expert and one of those talking, you know, they cut to talking heads and didn't really have anything to do with it but there was this guy i went and there's a lyric where kurt sings hello hello hello how low and i just thought that's genius whenever i hear that song i'm like that's genius hello hello how low how did he do it do that? I once saw a band live and someone did that to me as we're watching the band. I saw the UK band Wild Beast and he says, I con- I concur, I concur. And then the last one sounds like I conquer. And he goes, and that one was a conker. Do you get it?

I'm like, yeah. You went to, did you go to the gig with that old man musicologist? I was like, I'm just trying to watch the gig. And obviously it's during live concerts. He's yelling this into my ear. I conker, do you get it? It's genius. I love these guys.

Is that a pun? Fuck yeah. That is genius though, I will say. That is genius. That was Matt talking then. Yeah, in both cases, that was me. I was matt with talking then yeah in both cases that was me i was on the documentary i was watching and i was yelling at dave anyway dave how does this show that we're doing work i forget well what we do here is we take it in terms to report on a topic

often suggested to us by one of the listeners sometimes voted for by our patreon supporters we go away do a little bit of research bring it back to the group in the form of a little report and uh the other two don't know what it's going to be on and it's your turn matt reporters will go away, do a little bit of research, bring it back to the group in the form of a little report. And the other two don't know what it's going to be on. And it's your turn, Matt, to report. Yes? I put my hands up because I had a question. Yes?

I'll go to Jess first here. Have you ever referred to it as like a podcast report to other people and they've been very confused by it? They're baffled. I don't think so. I had it once where I was talking to another comedian who had just started her own podcast and I was like, oh, yeah, I think this is at the old stupid old studios. Like, what are you up to today?

And I was like, I'm just working on a podcast report. And she was like, a podcast report? Like, what is thinking there was some sort of reporting you had to do behind the scenes when you had a podcast? The podcast board. Yeah, exactly. I was like going through our facts and our stats. And I was like, oh, no, no, it's just what we call it,

where I write the topic or write the story for the show. Do you know how our pod works? Because I could explain that, but I won't do it well. And it was just a bit of a – and now I think about it all the time when I say I've got to go write a report. Yeah, I've got to go do my little homework assignment. Yeah, I've got to go do my assignment. That's I've got to go do my little homework assignment. Yeah, I've got to go do my assignment. That's exactly what it is.

They're little homework assignments. Yeah. Let's start calling them that. Okay. Yeah, go on. Do your little homework assignment. I've got homework to do. This week, it is Matt's turn to give us his homework.

We'll grade him. We don't know what the topic is. And to get us onto the topic, it always starts with a question, which again, sounds like we're doing some sort of classroom stuff. I had never heard of this topic, and I'm assuming you both haven't, but maybe you have, but because of that- Yeah, never assume with me. I've asked sort of a tangential question to the topic.

Okay, better than a tan rough question. Better than a tan trick question. Sexy. My question is, what is the sixth of the seven Catholic sacraments? Oh, I could have a go at this. Okay. Six of the seventh. Yeah, I think they're sort of ordered.

Well, yeah, but I just looked this up. Oh, is it last rites? I think that's the seventh, yeah. Oh, second last rites. What's before last rites? Because it's like baptism, first communion. There might be one in between there. Confirmation.

Reconciliation. Oh, reconciliation. And then first communion and then confirmation. So that's four. And then there's like... Something about a midlife crisis. Something about marriage. I've got this list here that doesn't feel right.

Something about marriage is correct. Yes. Matrimony. That's what I think. I don't know. I'm just looking at this list now and it's not even what I thought I'd copy down. So matrimony is number six. Whatever the website, I just copied it off was baptism, confirmation, Eucharist, reconciliation,

anointing of the sick, matrimony and holy orders. Anointing of the sick, right. But I guess holy orders, is that like being a priest or a nun? I mean, whatever. Oh, I guess so, yeah. It doesn't matter. This is very tangential. But I did all right.

You did great. Great work. I've done a few of them. The answer is matrimony or marriage because this topic is chock-a-block with the stuff. Okay. So, yeah, I figured you wouldn't know the name. Will you? Does the name Ethel Liversey mean anything to you?

Yes. Fuck. Yes, she is. My aunt. No. She is me. And I pull off my face mask. I'm going to go, I don't recognise Ethel, so this doesn't mean anything.

No. So, this is intriguing. Well, it was suggested by Daniel Roberts from Wagga Wagga who said, if you want another badass woman, you'll love it. Unbelievable story. We love a badass woman. Yeah, I find it interesting what he reads as a badass woman. Okay.

But it'll be interesting to see if you agree with Daniel. By the end of the report I want to see How much you agree With Daniel Roberts Okay Is she a badass woman Or is she just a bad woman Oh

I mean I don't know I'm asking the question I mean yeah That's a good question Yeah It was also suggested By Bron Liversy

Who's from Goulburn Where Ethel Liversy Spent some time In the story briefly, who wrote, despite having an unusual surname, we're not related. Oh, that was exciting. Just an absolute coincidence. That was exciting for a moment.

Yeah, I'm wondering if maybe she is related and she doesn't even know it. Wow. All right. So we're going back to Sydney, 1945. Ethel Liversey was to marry Rex Beach. That's fake. Rex Beach. Rex Beach.

That's great. Rex Beach is the real name. The press was dubbing it the Society Wedding of the Year. Oh. According to a book written by Nichols, I'm going to mention her in a second, but this is from her book. She wrote the book's called The Amazing Mrs. Livesey, and this is really the primary and only source for this story.

Okay. Nichols wrote, Outside the Australia Hotel, a crowd had gathered, hoping to catch a glimpse of the wealthy bride everyone was talking about. Hundreds lined Castle Ray Street from 7pm on that warm early summer evening. At 7.15pm, hotel staff rolled out the hotel's famous red carpet and by 7.30pm...

They were the first ones to do a red carpet. I like it, yeah. No, their one was in particular famous. That red carpet couldn't go out anywhere without being... Oh, God. Or that hassle. Just wants to go get a coffee, can't do it. That shade, people go, oh, my goodness.

Yeah, it's got to wear a hat and glasses. Is that the Australia Hotel red carpet? Oh, my goodness. Oh, la-di-da. By 7.30, the crowd had grown to enormous proportions, watching guest after guest file past in their finery, ball gowns that hadn't seen the light of day since before the war, new gowns for those who could afford them,

dinner suits and many returned servicemen in dress uniform. The numbers waiting outside continued to swell as invitations were checked and guests were admitted. A Daily Mirror reporter would later write that many openly gasped at the splendour of the feast before them and the variety of expensive liquors on offer. God, see, there just aren't things now that would just take our breath away like that we were talking about that um who was the uh

had heady heady lamar heady lamar and how people were gasped when they saw her how attractive she was yeah yeah her beauty was like it was all they were all struck I kind of laughed at that. And then I saw a photo of her later and I went, Yeah, you did. She was really hot. Yeah. That's weird that I didn't think there were people that hot anymore. I've seen Brad Pitt my whole life. You gasped and then, like, instant stiffy.

Yeah. And that, you know. I had a laptop on my lap. It's broken. But it wasn't on my lap any longer. Flew into the ceiling. It's gone. It's in space now. You remember that sound? Boy, oh, oh, oh. longer. It flew into the ceiling. It's gone. It's in space now.

You remember that sound? Boy, oh, oh, oh. Yeah. It was very embarrassing. What about food? Can you imagine someone lifting up the cloche and you're going, I reckon for me it would have to be like a human or something. Okay.

Oh, God. It would be like a disgust sound? Like a head or something. Yeah. What about like a really, really pretty dessert? Like a very intricately made dessert. And it's more of like a, ooh, rather than a, ooh. I'm not shocked by it.

I know there's something edible under there, hopefully. What about an animal you previously thought was extinct? Right. Tasmanian tiger, roasted. That would make me gasp We could have killed the last one Again we found it And now we're going to eat it

No one has tasted this animal in over 100 years Chefs carved and waiters Fluttered around with drinks The orchestra tuned their instruments for the wedding march But at 8.45pm, Mr. Baden Johnson, the banquet manager It's a fantastic title. Baden Johnson. Baden Johnson.

Banquet manager. That's good. Sorry, the bank manager? No, no, no. The banquet manager. It's like a small bank. He Johnson mounted the orchestra dais and addressed the guests saying Ladies and gentlemen Mumbo number five

Sorry I've been asked to announce That the hostess will not be able to be with us He stopped as gasps from the guests Turned into speculative murmurings I don't think people are gasping quite as much As we're being told You don't understand

1945 1945 big year for gasping quite as much as we're being told. You don't understand. 1945, big year for gasping. Wow. A lot of smokers. Yeah. She would like you to carry on as if she were here. Enjoy yourselves, he said. Okay.

And they did. They went, okay. They partied on. Apparently it was unlimited French champagne and they just... Just avoided eye contact with the groom. Yeah, he was just sitting in the corner looking very sad. Cheers to you, buddy.

Thanks so much. You guys are paying for this, I hear. Still paying? You're still paying for this? Cheers. No, he wasn't there either. That's right. Just before the big event, it was called off.

Livesey had been unmasked as a fraud. She wasn't who she appeared to be. The truth was she was Australia's greatest imposter. She had over 40 aliases, had already been married many times over, and there was a long list of outstanding fraud charges in her name. This is the story of the amazing Mrs. Liversea. Oh, so it seems like her fiancé Rex Beach really dodged a bullet there. Yeah, I think that's fair to say.

Because, you know, he didn't marry her. That's right. And as you're going to hear, many others did not dodge that bullet. Wow. A few years ago, this story was all but forgotten. That changed in 2013 when Livesey's granddaughter, Louida Aichinger, caught up with an old friend, author Frieda Nichols.

Aichinger told Nichols she was struggling to piece together her grandmother's story, and before long, Nichols was obsessed with the story. And then a couple of years after that, a book titled The Amazing Mrs. Livesey was released. That book has been my main source of information for this week's episode. And if anyone's interested in learning more, it's a fun read. I would recommend it.

I both downloaded the e-book and the Audible book. Oh, good. And just read along with the voice? Yeah, it was like when I was a kid again. Yeah. And they did have a little ring to turn the page? Yeah, it says, we're at the chime, turn the page. I wish it did.

That would have been sick. Oh, it's so good. More things should do that, I reckon. Newspapers. That'd be nice. Yeah. So I know when I've got to the end. I just want to know when I turn the page.

When? I've been stuck on this page for years. All right, so here is the story of the amazing Mrs. Liversey. Right, so here is the story of the amazing Mrs. Liversey. The woman now known as Mrs. Liversey was actually born Florence Elizabeth Ethel Swindles in Manchester, England on the 24th of September 1897. Oh my God, this is nominative determinism. Isn't that like, that's got to be one of the biggest nominative determinisms we've ever had, right? Yeah, and she's born in England.

Yeah. Yeah, right. Manchester. The Swindles were a well-off family. Or Swindells, maybe. Okay, yeah. That's how they'd say it. It's Swindell.

I have not been able to figure out what this show was. I remember it from when I was a kid. I reckon it was a cartoon. And there was a guy. It's Wiesel. Yes. What is that? It's just because you say it all the time. There is an I know that. I also know it from when I was a kid. I reckon it was a cartoon. And there was a guy. It's Weasel. Yes. What is that? It's just because you say it all the time. It's the other reason I know that.

I also know it from Matt only. If you know... Matt, explain the reference because I'd love someone to write in. So there's like... I think it's the bad guy. And he's sort of one of those hapless bad guys in a cartoon, probably from the 90s. And he would...

His sidekick maybe would always go, right way mr weasel and he'd always say it's weasel i'm so sorry i just gave you a moment of hope by saying you're like yes what is it like no mate you just say that a lot it's weasel it's definitely not the TV show I Am Weasel Oh that could be it The show is called It's Weasel But he was a cool character The sad one on that was I Are Baboon Oh

That rings a bell That rings no bells Which means I'm not going to turn the page The Swindells Were a well off family and held plenty of status and power in the town, with her father, Frank, having made his money in cotton, and Florence Elizabeth Ethel Swindells. I'm just going to call her Ethel from now on. Yeah.

She lived a very comfortable childhood. But with a world war around the corner, things are about to get tougher. According to Nichols, Ethel was three months short of 18 when she married Alexander Alec Carter, against her father's wishes. She lied about her age at the registry office, left school and home, and moved to the town of Eccles to the north of Manchester, where her new husband was working as a stationer with his father. The Great War had started in August the previous year, and Ethel later recalled big parties in the street and how the boys from the Manchester Grammar School talked of nothing else except fighting for king and country with large numbers

of boys and men signing up. They thought the war would last no more than a few months, and they were keen to be a part of it. after a few months the reality of war began filtering back together with the lists of dead and wounded alec didn't immediately enlist as he was classed unfit for active service when he applied to join up with his father at the beginning of the war but by 1916 men were falling like flies and the war office began calling up those who had been rejected at the start no actually we've looked here you know what asthma is not such a big deal i reckon if you maybe just take it kind of easy yeah um yeah you can come and join bring spare fentolin yeah becquetide if you need yeah whatever whatever you need whatever you need to come along yeah get along i reckon yeah they just changed the requirement to, sorry, just double checking, are you still alive?

Yeah, that's right. Fantastic. Come on down. Start at nine. He was trained as a gunner to operate and load the Howitzer heavy field guns and was then sent to the Western Front in June 1916, leaving Ethel four months pregnant with his extended family. Ethel received money, a pension from the Ministry of Pensions in the War Office,

which could be accessed once a week at the post office via a ring paper. This is a thing I'd never heard of before, but I'm going to mention it a bit. These ring papers were issued to the wives and children of soldiers and sailors sent off on active duty. The names of the dependents were given to the war office by each serviceman. A numbered ring paper was then issued to the dependent, with wives receiving a bit over six pounds a week. All they had to do was go to the nominated post office, hand over the numbered ring paper that showed their name,

and then this was checked off a ledger and they'd get the cash. Yeah, right. Six pounds doesn't sound like a lot, but I think it was a decent amount of money because this story goes over 20 or 30 years. Yeah. But I think at one point it was like, yeah, add a couple of zeros to the end.

So I think it's like maybe 600 bucks in today's money, something like that, I think. Fucking hell. That's not bloody bad. But Ethel was bored and lonely. Stuck in Eccles, she kept herself amused by going to the shops and spending the money. Rather than hand the money to her mother-in-law to help with living expenses, Ethel spent it all on clothes, shoes and going to the movies,

which led to some pretty heated disagreements with her mother-in-law. So Ethel moved back into her father's home. In early November 1916, a letter arrived from the war office. Alec was missing in action, presumed dead. Ethel's world crumbled. She took to her bed and refused to leave. Her mother tried to coax her to eat, but all Ethel could do was cry, falling into an exhausted sleep each night. falling into an exhausted sleep each night. Frank Alexander Carter was born on the 26th of November 1916,

but Ethel couldn't even look at her newborn baby. Her parents decided to take baby Frank away and care for him in another part of the house, thinking their daughter would recover and care for her baby when she was better. Instead, Ethel woke one night to the sound of her baby crying, got up, packed a few things and quietly left her parents' home. She headed off in no particular direction and ended up jumping on a train and jumping off at another station before the inspector was able to come and ask her for a ticket. She woke up, the ticket inspector's coming, she's like, whoop, nice stop. The station she jumped off at, she bumped into a soldier named Billy Taylor. Ethel told him her name was Ethel Smith.

Just a random name she came up with. Hi, I'm Ethel Smith. Okay. All right. That's good. It's interesting she stuck with a name she goes by. Yeah. First name, but maybe she got halfway through.

Her name's Ethel Smith. Smith. She stayed with him for the next week telling the landlady that they were married ethel was mourning the death of her husband and had fallen ill with a fever so for the next week billy cared for her after a week billy had to head back to the war and this is back to nickel's book i have to go back he began i think uh there's no way she had the uh transcripts of some of these conversations. No, Ethel recorded it on her iPhone.

That's right. Always recording. She's got it all. I have to go back, he began, stroking her arm. I'm absent without leave, but I didn't want to leave you when you were so ill. Ethel looked at him expectantly. There were plans to make, things to organize. But before she could reply there was a

knock at the door they looked at each other in surprise and then to the wooden door as it opened when two policemen and the smirking manager s walked into the room ethel shrieked you're both under arrest the older officer stated what for billy are sitting up you're not married are you started he stated looking at them as ethel tried to hide under the duvet you're both under arrest for giving false information to a lodging housekeeper that was the church oh my god it's the lamest one ever to a lodging housekeeper you can't lie to a landlady it's not right. You're nicked. Yeah, no, but you know what? Now that I think about it, that makes sense.

I think that's a real dog act. Yeah. Just the ethics around that. Yeah. The ethics of not telling a woman whose business it definitely is to know that you're married when you're not. Yeah, that's what I was talking about. I said, is she a badass or is she just bad? She's terrible at this point. Wow.

That poor landlady, do you think that she had to pay her some damages for that? Yeah, I think there might have been some emotional damages. God, imagine the therapy she'd need. And then she came and said her last name was Smith. The most common name there is. Did he respect me with coming up with a new name? She told me they were married. I knew they were.

She wasn't wearing a ring. I was listening to them through the wall and I thought, well, everything's fine because they're married. But now it just keeps going around and around in my head. They were sinning. I heard a sin. Ethel didn't see Billy until the trial

She missed him and also thought he might be able to get a ring paper for her To collect money while he was back at the front She's incredible Put a ring on it, makes sense That's where it came from Is that where wedding rings come from? I think, yeah First it was the ring papers

And then they went You know what, let's use that symbol of the ring paper And first they were like i don't know yeah like like blue ring octopus we could give everyone who gets married a blue ring octopus but people started dying how do you take care of them yeah you're gonna have some sort of water and then they eventually settled on a on a finger ring um no we all said a lot of finger so in the in the trial it turned out and this was news to Ethel, that Billy was married with children.

Billy, you dog. You dog, you low dog. But to be fair, all he was doing was looking after her while she was ill, right? To be fair, she's also married with a child. Yeah. Ah, yes. So really he was just being a good person, and I suppose probably, you know, from being married with children, he's a nurturer.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I think they were boning as well. No, no, no, no, no. She's had a fever. That's between the lines. Dick fever. I've got dick fever. I've got a fever for dick.

Is it another one of the poetic licenses the author took? Made the characters real horny. Real horny. Real horny. The next section is deeply erotic. Throbbing member. The police come in, but they're stripper police. You're under arrest, Ethel.

You've been a bad, bad girl. Ethel. You've got to think of the porn name for this movie by the end of the episode too, please, Dave. Okay. What did you call the episode? Well, the book is called The Amazing Miss Liversey. Okay. But you're going to have a few names of hers to work off

if one hits you better than that. Something in swindles, surely. Something there. Swindles. Something like swingers or something. I don't know. Not to step on your toes, Dave. Please.

Just something for you to help brew. Yeah. Mull it over. Mull on. So this was news to Athelon. She was pissed that she heard that Billy was married with children. Yeah. How dare he?

She's also married. Although she does think her husband is dead in the war. She thinks. So that doesn't count. Well, yeah, they didn't find a body. No wedding that ever occurred quite recently matters because he's dead. Fuck it. Fuck it.

Oh, my. Widows back then. I'll tell you what, not like they widow today. No, they'll wait at least a couple of weeks. But I think, yeah, it sounds like she thought their relationship was going somewhere. She thought it was going to ring papers and her getting six pounds a week. Yeah, that's what she's annoyed. So what, now what, she'll be getting 12 pounds?

Well, maybe. She's annoyed that someone's already claimed that six. That's what she's annoyed about. Yeah. Yeah, that's right. She's like, I'll split it. I'll split it. I'll go three pounds.

His wife was in the courtroom and she was obviously pretty hurt as well. What a fucking dog. So, Heather was so pissed that in the trial She turned on Billy When it was her turn to tell her Side of the story to the magistrate Telling him that Billy had hoodwinked her She was convincing As she was let free while for his crime

Of lying to an innkeeper Billy was sentenced to six months in jail Fuck imagine if he was sentenced to death Or something like that But still this is during a time where they're so desperate for soldiers. They're like, actually, this is, honestly, I'd rather let Hitler win than you go unpunished. I think that was kind of the vibe. The judge is like, you're not worthy of being out there as cannon fodder.

He's like, oh, thank God. Yeah, honestly, six months in prison or go to war. Bit of a chance to work on yourself. I'd be going to prison. Do some reading. Don't have to do any cooking. Or like, I don't have to vacuum. Don't have to do the groceries.

Don't have to shoot at a stranger. You don't have to do that at war either. Okay. Yeah, all those things you described are benefits either way. Yeah, but then there's a lot of like sleeping outside and trench foot and stuff. I don't want to do that. Oh, yeah. You're thinking World War I as well, probably.

Because that's the relevant one to this story. Surely they were still getting dysentery in World War II, weren't they? Yeah. Shitting themselves. That's true. I don't want to shit myself. If I have the choice of shit yourself or not shit yourself. Shit yourself or get shivved yourself

I take the risk Of getting shivved To be honest I'm I'm pretty big I reckon In a women's prison Yeah you'd kick the shit

Out of quite a lot of people I think in any prison I don't think they'd fuck with me I think you'd be the one shiving Yeah Yeah I'd do some shiving Get ready Get ready

What is it Get busy shiving Yeah that's what do some shiven get ready get ready what is it get busy shiven get ready get ready shiving fuck get ready what do they say what's the thing uh get uh get to get to shiven nope that's not it someone must have that must be a line someone's used before get busy shiven or get busy dying. That's good stuff. I'll get that tattooed. It should be get... With a shiv, homemade tattoo.

Yeah. Get busy shivving or get busy dying. And then in smaller text, buy shiv. Shiv or be shiv. Yes. Oh, that's good. That's more succinct. And that's a picture of shiv from that show where there's a character called shiv.

Yeah. This is just my cousin Siobhan, who we call Shiv. That show where the main guy always says, fuck off. Succession. Succession, thank you. Haven't even seen it. Again, it's because of his impression. You're so good at it.

God, you're good, Matt. It's so good, even though you don't know the other side of it. Like you hear him saying it, you're like, huh, that's so good, even though you don't know the other side of it. Like, you hear him saying it, and you're like, huh, that doesn't even sound like the same words. Anyway, so quickly putting it behind her, this whole ordeal. Just let Billy go to jail for lying. Well, I think she helped put him there by saying, he did it, he got me hoodwinked.

I think that's the word she used. So then Ethel headed to the resort town of Blackpool, which she had fond childhood memories in. Around two weeks after leaving court, she met Corporal Raymond Ward while he was on rest and recreation leave from the war. The two married the following day, just before he returned to the battlefield.

Okay, she's pretty keen to marry. She must be hot. Or just, like, really charismatic. Or there just weren't many women options around. Or, like, you know tomorrow you're going to war, probably going to die. Yeah, so why would you get married? Well, it's one way to guarantee a night with

someone else okay which is the reason i got married yeah any day now is that like you don't want to be a virgin in heaven or something oh imagine imagine going to heaven and i need to go to like the virgin bar sitting with mary sitting with Mary at the breakfast buffet. Mary's like, hey, finally. Because that's actually how they sort you. Yeah? Yeah. By how many fucks? Yeah.

It's pretty lame. Dave will be the other end of you and me. I'm on 10,000. No, 10 million. It's too many fucks. Too many. I'm so tired. That's why you love the pod so much It's a break from all that

This is the only time I'm not getting busy Getting busy So got married again Now she's sort of married twice at the same time Now to Raymond Ray Ward According to Nichols She decided it was time to write to her father She just, she'd run away.

Yeah. Left her baby. They obviously was going through a lot of stuff. She's like, I better let him know I'm safe. But also to ask how her son's going. She had yet to mention baby Frank to her new husband, but Ray seemed so kind. She was sure he would welcome Frank into their family. No point telling him until he returned and she'd deal with it then. And so she just had baby Frank, right?

Yeah, there'd be some signs probably. Is that what you mean? No. If Ray was paying attention. He's still got the umbilical cord attached to his head. But to be honest, I'm a virgin. Never seen that before. But honestly, never seen anything before.

So I assume that's how it's supposed to look. No further questions. No, I'm just thinking. But I don't want to guess at something in case I'm right and you had it as a reveal or something. That's all. Oh, I mean, yeah. Go on, have a guess.

I'm just wondering if she will, like, if he goes off to war for a while and comes back and she's like, he is our child. Oh, no. Okay, good. She keeps moving forward. She doesn't do a lot of looking back. She doesn't wait for anybody.

So, Ray offered his parents' place to live, but she declined, preferring to stay at a lodging house run by landlady Mrs. Skerritt. Do to scare it though yeah whatever you do hope you don't listen um so yeah she was she didn't really want to bunker in with the with her new husband's family really non-committal isn't she quick to marry but preferred it yeah it's interesting isn't it i won't be spending any time because she'd have to turn what Do you think she'd have to turn up with child? Or is she still happy with the child? No, she hasn't gone to collect the child.

She should have gone then. Yeah, especially because, I mean, it would be free, basically. Free rent or whatever. Whereas she's gone and now she's having to pay rent. But she does have a ring paper from husband Ray. The last in-laws she fought with a lot. Yeah, so maybe she's having to pay rent, but she does have a ring paper from husband Ray. Yeah, and I suppose the last in-laws she fought with a lot. Yeah, so maybe she's like... I don't want to repeat that.

So having married another soldier, she once again had a ring paper. She could collect a wage from a coordinator, Nichols. She filled her days going to the shops, the movies, and the theatre. On tour in the town at that time was popular actress who shared her new name ethel ward curious ethel took in her show at the majestic theater and watched the elegantly dressed miss ward on stage playing the lead role in a romantic drama miss ward's hair was piled high with lace covering her shoulders and long neck as she played the wronged woman with style and grace.

Ethel felt that it was her up on stage. She felt like she's, I'm here watching me. Oh, Ethel. It was her drama and she was watching it all unfold. An innocent woman scorned by a cruel man, in her case, Billy. I don't feel like Ethel was all that scorned at all. Was she that innocent? They were just hooking up at the station yeah she i believe she also didn't tell him about her child and she had a husband but she's like you fuck yeah you absolute fuck sounds like they

were just hanging out yeah both she was trying to their troubles. She was a bit sick and he was making her feel better. Yeah, it is interesting. She holds a bit of a grudge there and she does normally feel like, she doesn't see what she's done as wronging anyone, but she does feel it in the other direction a bit. She's a badass. Ethel followed her namesake's career closely reading magazine and newspaper articles about her back to nickels then ethel started going out at night

pretending to be the young actress dyeing her hair chestnut and wearing it in the same style as miss ward she could often be found in the company of soldiers and sailors on leave despite her husband still being at the front eth Ethel told the men various stories about herself. She was sometimes an actress, sometimes an artist, but most often her story was that her husband had been killed at the front and that she was there to forget. At that time, Blackpool was full of people trying to forget there was a war going on. After hearing of her husband's death, one soldier coincidentally called Smith, felt sorry enough for Ethel that before returning to battle, he organized a ring paper for her, stating on it that she was his wife.

So she scored another ring paper. And a bunch of STDs. Yeah. But she's still, I mean, can you blame her? She's furious. Billy cheated on her, basically. Yeah. Billy, the dog, that dog scum.

Yeah. How dare he hurt her like that? And she sees that as the big heartbreak of her life, not the fact that the first husband died. Yes. That's when she married an actually loved husband. Actually liked. Yeah.

But the guy that looked after her while she was sick didn't tell her about his husband. The dog. I can't believe you're bringing that dog up again. Billy, you dog. My blood is boiling. I've got to go fuck my way through Blackpool. Blackpool?

Yeah. Yeah, oh yeah. And look, I'm not, you know, I'm a sex positive person. I'm just saying, Ethel. You do you. Billy. Give Billy a break maybe.

Give Billy a break and maybe give your pussy a break you're no better than him because you're lying to a bunch of men and i reckon but it's not technically a lie a lot a lot of a lot of it is my husband died at the front that's right that's right. That's true. More omission than lie. I didn't tell you about my second husband. I'm here to forget what Billy did. And that I have a husband. And a child. Kind of two husbands.

Yeah. Now, I guess three, now that this guy's taken pity on her. Two real husbands and one faux husband. So now she's at least getting two ring papers. That's right, yep. Ethel didn't mention a smith, this one who forged the ring papers. She didn't mention to him that she was already married. But now she had these two sets of ring slips

and therefore two lots of wages to draw on. It was the perfect crime. The only way she could stuff it up is go to the post office to collect the money as Mrs. Ward, where they know her as Mrs. Smith or vice versa. Great, but no one would ever do that. No, and I'm certainly not foreshadowing anything. Yeah, I don't know why you'd even mention that.

It seems like such an easy thing to not muddle up. Yeah, it's not a Chekhov's foreshadowing sort of scenario. Chekhov's ring paper. It's not Chekhov's ring paper, no. Ray would send Ethel letters from the front and her replies were filled with love and stories about how wonderful life was in Blackpool. But they did omit the fact that she was entertaining other men.

Ethel always felt better going shopping and it helped fuel her fantasy life. And with two ring papers to draw on, she could spend a bit more on things she wanted. Rather than move to finer lodgings, her extra money was spent on more clothes and visits to the beautician and hairdresser. After all, she needed to look like the star she was. Right, she needed to extend her neck to be like that. That really stood out to me, that line as well.

And her long neck. She was a freak! She had star quality. That giraffe. I've never seen a giraffe act so well. She could reach all the tallest branches. She's in a zoo. And there's a giraffe named Ethel.

She's like, oh, that's me in that band. She's losing her mind. But it was never enough. No matter what she bought, it was never enough. And soon she started telling her fantastic stories to the shop owners. The owner of one of her favorite shops, Mrs. Hall, happily listened to her stories. Ethel's stories always had a little bit of truth about them. On top of the fantastical stuff, she told Mrs. Hall how she was a war widow who had tragically lost her first husband,

which was obviously true, or she believed to be be true but had again found happiness with her second uh ethel spent up big and mrs hall didn't hesitate to offer her a line of credit ethel loved that shop and purchased numerous outfits hats bags shoes and even a bright red feather boa just like the hollywood actresses wore but after racking up an account close to 20 pounds which is over two grand in today's money, Ethel stopped going to the shop and Mrs. Hall began to wonder if the fabulous Mrs. Ward was ever going to settle her account. Then one Saturday evening, Mrs. Hall spotted Ethel at a dance hall on a date with a sailor wearing the feather boa she still hadn't paid for. Ethel smiled at Mrs Hall. Mrs Hall did not smile back. According to Nichols,

the following Monday morning, Ethel woke late. The weekend had been a whirlwind of fun. She had met a charming sailor and they had laughed and danced the entire weekend. He had left with promises of seeing her again when he was next on leave. Laying in bed,

wondering what she would do that day. She's even, this is a good thing about Nichols, got in her head. Yeah, it's amazing how Nichols has got into every facet.

She's just a little poetic license pop. That's beautiful. No, I'm loving it. Don't misread me. I love this. I love it too. It definitely made it

a more fun read. Oh, definitely, yeah. And, you know, it's all painting a beautiful picture yeah i can i can see it all in my head so she's laying in bed wondering what to do for the day when she heard the post arrive she made her way downstairs to see what was in the mail it was usually only bills which she would ignore for as long as as she could but today a letter sat on the doormat bearing her father's familiar handwriting. Oh, I thought it was going to be a letter from Mrs. Hall

and she opened it up and it was like a cloche with a head on a plate. Something like that. A feather bow was head. While waiting for the water to boil, she stared at the letter. Her father would be upset with her, but he would forgive her. He always had. She could explain. Ethel suddenly snatched the letter,

turned it over, took a deep breath and then slowly, carefully opened it. What is a deep breath if not a gasp? She's just doing it all the time. About to open this letter. She couldn't believe what she was reading. Her father was concerned about her.

That's not the bit she couldn't believe. Baby Frank was now living with her in-laws. But the one sentence that caused her the most consternation was, Alec is alive. He had been wounded. I told you Thorne, he was dead. Oh, my goodness. He foreshadowed it like eight times, Dave.

Keep up. Fucking hell. Oh, well done, Dave. Aren't you clever? You fucking idiot. My little grey cells have been working pretty hard over here. Dave's picking up what you're putting down. Thank you, Matt.

The times you winked at me. He's dead. Wink. I'm like, oh, he's trying to tell me something. Can't figure out what it is. So Alec is alive. Alec's alive. Uh-oh, which means the second marriage is now called into question.

But Billy, you dog. Billy's still a scumbag. No doubt about that. Fuck you, Billy, you fucking dog. A few things are questioned now, but not that Billy is a low, low dog. No, no. That is in concrete. So he'd been wounded but was in hospital wanting to know where ethel was her

father insisted she could come home immediately and everything would be fine so many emotions raced through her happiness shame anger fear while she was processing this there was a knock at the door and it was the cops they were there to arrest her for obtaining goods under false pretenses from Mrs. Hall. Oh, my God, Ethel. According to Nichols, Mrs. Hall stood in court and told the story Ethel had given her, finishing her evidence by recounting the shameless behavior she had witnessed at the Blackpool Ballroom. Ethel's landlady, Mrs. Skerritt... Jeez, the landladies back then would dog you as well.

Fuck, no. Now they'll just dog you in their. Fuck, no. So, yeah. Now they'll just dog you in their bloody rent prices at my right. So, firstly, Mrs. Hall's like, this is the sob story she gave me. She was, her husband was at war. But then I saw her with some sailor at this ballroom wearing the stuff that she hadn't paid for. So, she's saying that all in court. And then Ethel's land. She's slut shaming her so is that what you're doing yeah that's what

it feels like it does sound like well otherwise she's just saying i saw her out wearing clothes that she bought from my shop like that's not the big deal it's that she's with the sailor i think what she's saying is her story's bullshit so she told her this story that meant that she gave her this line of credit and she's like no she's a liar and she's hasn't paid me so her husband's away ethel will play and then i saw her out but you can't go out without your husband if your husband's away you can't go out oh that's yeah no that's true i mean she's slut shaming she was she was saying i was i guess she was back then um extramarital affairs weren't as cool as they are now yeah now it's cool if you see someone cheating on their husband you're like yes now i'm like hey get it you say something like that yeah get it girl yeah and i say like i don't know

the ins and outs of their marriage who am am I to define what their marriage is? Who knows what Ray is? Ray is probably like goat. Maybe he's in on it. Have fun with it. Maybe that is sexy to him. Maybe that's Ray dressed up as a sailor. That's fun.

Role playing. You got to keep it fresh. Yeah, maybe they often just put all their ring papers in a bowl and whoever's they pick out. Whatever. Who am I to yuck their yum? Yeah. Well, I'll tell you who, Mrs. Hall.

She should have said, she hoodwinked me. Yes. If the movie didn't say that, Ethel would be like, that's my fucking line. Now, fucking do you, Mrs. Hall. Now I've got two enemies, Billy and Mrs. Hall. And now Ethel's landlady, Mrs. Skerritt. Oh, Skerritt. Who stood up and happily told all about Ethel's vast array of beautiful new clothing and costume jewelry.

And most damningly, men staying at her establishment in the company of Mrs. Ward. Who's now Ethel. Yeah. Her arrest had made the evening papers. And everyone in the crowded courtroom seemed to be staring at her. Which makes sense. Yeah, that's the reason they're there. She's a bit rude.

They're all staring at me. Can I help you? Is there something on my face? Take a picture. It'll last longer. That's where that phrase comes from. Why does the jury keep looking at me? Look, they're judging me somehow.

And this judge, what are you doing? Stop staring at me. So Nichols goes on saying her world was closing in she felt so let down by mrs hall mrs scarrett yeah by women and even her own father which i'm not sure how she felt i don't know i can understand her being dobbed in by miss scarrett that would maybe that would feel shit miss Yeah, that's frustrating. Miss Hall. Miss Hall, you're like, well, I did steal from you, but still. Bit of a dog act. But then her dad.

I'm mad at you, Dad. Yeah. For writing me a letter telling me my first husband's alive. And saying, please come home. Come home. We love you. Because you've abandoned your child. And what did he say?

It'll all be okay. It'll all be fine. Fuck you, Dad. Like, through all of it, he's so supportive. You'll see that as the story goes on. I feel like she's the kind of person that just blames everyone but herself wow dave dave wow mad if i could speak for both of us yeah wow wow yeah wow i'm pretty perceptive as you saw before with the uh i knew that the husband i alive. I knew it. So many times he said presumed death. So many times.

I only noticed once. But that's all I needed. I only needed one clue. I don't need 10 like Jess over here. You're pandering to her. First one you do, I'm like, lock that away for later. We're back at the zoo. Here we go.

The case wasn't looking good for Ethel until the judge announced that her father-in-law was going to pay back the money. So this is Ray Ward, her husband. Yeah. His dad heard about the story and he's like, this is bringing shame to our family. It sounds like he's doing a real good thing. But as soon as he talks to her, he's like, you brought shame to our family. Yeah, get the fuck out. Come with me. I'm paying your money. You'll come with me. Sort of thing. Wow. I'm's like, you brought Shane to our family. Yeah, get the fuck out. Come with me.

I'm paying you money. You'll come with me. Sort of thing. Wow. I'm going to keep you on the straight and narrow. But at first she was confused thinking, wait, was that Alec Carter's dad? That's who, when she thought her husband,

she thought her first husband. But no, it's her second husband. Oh my God. When she'd forgotten she had two husbands. You know whose dad it's not? Fucking Billy. Where's he? Yeah, Billy.

Where's Billy's dad? Not only is Billy a dog. Hey, Apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Where's Mr. Billy? Yeah. Hey, where's Billy Senior? I bet he's cheating on Billy's mum. Yeah, for sure.

Learned behaviour. Come on. Couple fucking dogs. Fucking dogs. The Billys. Probably at the pound where he belongs, that sick dog. So Ray's father bailed her out and like I said

he's like, alright, you're coming with me now though. The magistrate then sentenced her to a two year good behaviour bond when maybe she would have otherwise served time. Okay, well. Don't lie to landladies. Shit. You don't lie to Mrs Skerritt.

So because Mr Ward was saying, you've brought our families home in a disrepute, you're coming to live with us now until Ray's back, Ethel had other ideas. She said, all right Alright Before I come over I've just got to pick up Some stuff from my apartment So they went to her apartment

And She shoved things into her bag And then Fled Yeah He came into the room She sort of hoodwinked him Yeah

Hey Oh Maybe she learned that from Billy Yeah And she She went down to the station holding a, you know, stuffed bag. And she bumped into a man named Fred Lee. Get fucked.

Are you kidding me? What's his name? Fred Lee. Fred Lee. Train stations are just a place to hook up. Yeah. Real horny in the 40s. I definitely, every time I'm at a train station, I'm like, bunch of people here.

I want to fuck. Yeah. I love when a stranger talks to'm at a train station, I'm like, bunch of people here, I want to fuck. Yeah, I love when a stranger talks to me at a train station. And they all smell good. Here we go. Remember, there was an old free newspaper that had an ex bumped into you section? Yeah. Hey, I bumped into a guy with a red beard.

Oh, my God. Every time I was reading it, I'm like, oh, yep. Here we go. Here we go again. I remember being quite disappointed I was never in that. Nobody was like, a girl on the Glenn Waveley line, you took my breath away. Never.

I gasped. So she bumps into this guy, Fred Lee. Lee was a con artist himself and introduced himself saying he was a fan of Ethel's work. He was an odd kind of fellow. So it got a little bit of coverage in the newspaper. And he's like, I like what you did there. You sort of, you hoodwinked him.

Amazing. According to Nichols, there must have been something about Fred Lee. Because despite him being a bit odd, Ethel stayed with him for a few months and worked at an illegal gambling establishment he was running. A place called The Casino on Pleasure Beach. Pleasure Beach. Yeah. And it was illegal, so they obviously had to name it something

that doesn't point to what it is. Hiding in plain sight. Casino. Well, obviously, that's not a casino. It's going to be a coffee shop or something, I assume. It was straight out of a movie, though perhaps not as glamorous as she would have liked. Ethel's main job was to assess the punters, size up check out how much cash they had on them and if she

thought of them a light touch invite them in for a game of cards what started off as a convenient place to stay and earn money quickly turned into an opportunity for her to learn how to cheat at cards and fleece servicemen out of their pay so she learns how to cheat at cards and fleece servicemen out of their pay. So she learns how to cheat at cards here. For shadowing. She was playing the Dave. Yeah.

That was for Jess. That wasn't for you. Yeah. No. Card shark. I'm all over it. I've got that written down in my little

pocket book over here. I need a few more hints. She was playing the role of a femme fatale and reveling in it. As well as the money she earned with Fred Lee, she was still drawing on two ring papers as Mrs Ward and Mrs Smith.

She enjoyed dressing up, disguising herself, wearing wigs and heavy makeup. She did, however, avoid distinctive clothing that stood out, worried that maybe Mrs Hall or someone else would recognise her. No more red feather boas. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, that was a bit too bold, I think. She was managing just fine until she turned up at the post office where she was known as Mrs Ward

and presented the puzzled postmistress with the ring papers for a Mrs Smith. Hang on a second. I think Matt might have said something to that effect earlier on. He did. Realising her mistake, she grabbed the ring paper back and left the post office as quickly as she could. Oh, I've forgotten who I am. Goodbye.

Good day. She had stuffed up and that sweet gravy train was coming to a halt. Oh, no. Oh, my God. Fred Lee told her to chuck out the Smith ring paper as she didn't have a marriage certificate to back it up, and then she went to London to lay low. Staying with Fred Lee's mate, Ernie Stevens,

she was now going by the name Ethel Stevens. Oh, my God. Apart from when she was picking up her remaining ring paper payment, then she was obviously Mrs. Ward. Whilst in London, Ethel went shopping and found a great hat she really wanted but couldn't afford. She started spinning a tale to the shopkeeper, but accidentally switched her name from Mrs. Stevens to Mrs. Ward mid-story. Realizing her mistake, she left the shop,

but before long, just around the corner, a man's voice called out to her. Mrs. Stevens? She didn't want to tell him. She's like, what's going on here? And he goes, or is it Mrs. Ward? She turned to see a policeman. The shopkeeper had narked. What?

Like, what the? Who the fuck are these shopkeeps who just... They just... Oh, my God. The scandal. I understand the Mrs. Ward... The Mrs... Whatever her name was who she owed two grand to.

Totally, yeah. But the person who's like, I was about to try and scam the government out of a few hundred pounds. Yeah. Or you're a hat. pounds yeah or yeah you're a hat you sell hats you're a hat you're a hat let's say you're a hat that's right sorry yeah this was the hat one sorry yes you're a hat you're on the shelf you think oh this lady's gonna take me away might live on her head but then you hear she's got two names and you think, I'm going to call the police. Yeah, that's right. It didn't work.

That's the thing. It didn't work. But also like. What's the crime? What's the crime? The crime is. Having two names? Yeah.

A succulent. A story. What if she just got married and she wasn't used to her new married name yet? That's true. Why are you jumping straight to fraud? But unfortunately, she was busted, and the cop searched her and found the ring papers of both Mrs. Ward and the fraudulent Mrs. Smith one too,

which she hadn't thrown out despite Fred Lee's suggestion. So if she didn't have that paper on her, it would have been like, it just gave apparently was enough of a reason at the time for the policeman to search her, and that got her in trouble. So, she's going back to court. Oh, my God, Ethel.

Various post office workers who had paid out money to Ethel using the different aliases testified, as did a policeman who said Ethel offered sex in exchange for destroying evidence. Ethel using the different aliases testified, as did a policeman who said Ethel offered sex in exchange for destroying evidence. Ethel. Apparently fraudulent, apparently fraudulent use of ring papers was on the rise and the magistrate wanted to make an example of her and he sentenced her to six months hard labour

at the infamous Strangeways prison. Have you heard of Strangeways? Strangeways Here We Come is the name of... An album by The Smiths? The Smiths, yeah. That's right. Apparently it's often referenced in British pop culture. There's also a song by Deep Purple

and a poem by John Cooper Clarke. Anyway, so she's in the big house for the first time. According to Nichols, 300 women were housed in four wings at Strangeways, the notorious home of murderers and Irish political prisoners. Ethel was in there for swindling a few extra dollars, not killing anyone. To her, it all seemed very unjust.

Yeah, well, get ready shiven. As they say. As they say, get ready shiven. But she's so... Dave said before she's like blaming everybody but herself and now she's like It's not fair that I'm in here That person murdered someone

All I did was a lot of fraud Yeah That's right So Strangeways in Manchester was cramped, dark and damp And her stint there was the lowest point of her life The other female prisoners were horrible The wardens cruel, and the

work monotonous and hard. I like complaining about the work in prison. The hard labour I've been sentenced to is hard. I can't get a promotion. I'm constantly overlooked. I'm certainly not being

rehabilitated. No. If anything this is just a bloody criminal factory. This is habilitating me. Six months later, she was out again and working with Lee once more. According to Nichols, Fred would introduce her to poor blokes straight off the Western Front. She'd charm them and tell them she wanted to marry them, then ask for money for wedding clothes

and an engagement ring before finally disappearing, leaving the men wondering what had happened. Fred would look out for her and they'd split the money. That's pretty brutal. That's great. Pretty badass. They'd always end a date and there's just a guy watching them. Yeah.

Yeah. Oh, don't worry. He's just a guy watching them. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, don't worry. He's with me. It's all good. He's like, all right there. All right there, love. Don't worry about me. I'm a con man.

Oh, my God. Have you asked him for the money yet? Just your friendly local con man. Well, pick a card, sir. At the end of the war in 1918, she finally decided to head home to face the music. Ethel told them she'd been working with the foreign office as an undercover spy. That's what she's telling her parents. Oh, that's good.

Journeying into France and Belgium incognito as a commercial traveler. Her story was padded out with details about different places she had heard about from the return servicemen she'd fleeced in London. Street names, famous places, vivid descriptions of war-torn lands. So she's just sort of like taking in all the stuff as she's... She's a sponge. Yeah. What's your favorite street in Belgium? Great.

Mine's a scientist avenue. Yeah. A lot of great architecture on scientist avenue. Yeah, a scientist avenue. What a great architecture on that avenue. Her dad was stoked to see her again and proud of her stories while her mother was having none of it. She couldn't understand why her daughter hadn't come back sooner to see her first husband return from war and her son. She's like, you thought he was dead and he came back to life

and you haven't even... Come back. You haven't come back to... And then his husband's like, hang on, why are you referring to me as your first husband? Yeah. She's also spent no time with her kid. Yes. Like, got annoyed that a baby was crying and just left.

Never came back. Yeah, and seemingly not really even that curious about him. Yeah. It just... That sucks. Ethel told her mother that she would go visit Alec right away. Her dad asked if she needed money. She said she did.

She took some cash from her dad and left, saying, I'll go visit Alec, I'll be right back. But instead of heading to Alec's, she went back to London. She quickly spent her dad's money on fancy clothes. Within days, she met and married returning soldier al spurges what and uh they partied together celebrating the end of the war but when her new husband's finances ran out she left nichols continues so that was it that was a quick marriage that one wow ethel was on her first outing in another new outfit to celebrate the last of her father's money when she met captain william thornton

i'm sorry that's over the start captain william thornton norman giblet giblet is such a fucking great name oh my god captain giblet captain giblet that's so good uh he uh he was billy Giblet. Billy Giblet. Oh, my God. Billy Giblet? That's a rock star. That's very good. Billy Giblet was waiting to be sent back home to Australia.

Tall, dark, and handsome, Billy Giblet, or Norman Giblet, as he went around, but missed opportunity to me. Giblet was a ticket away from the mess in England. Norman had been one of the first to sign up when war was declared he was in the first landing at gallipoli and was quickly promoted to second lieutenant or lieutenant before evacuating with the rest of the troops and being sent to the western front there he was promoted to lieutenant and then captain and was awarded the military cross and bar for gantry in september 1917 at the Battle of Polygon Wood.

He had everything Ethel was after, security, respectability, good looks. He was even a proper war hero. All of that and the prospect of starting a new life in a new country. Her name was Daphne Pollard, she told him, with a laugh when they first met. She laughed!

Daphne Pollard. Yeah, she couldn't give it to him. She's like, that's such a ridiculous name. And he said, I'm Captain Giblet. She went, that's even funnier. Yeah, great. Okay, we're both taking the piss here. She named herself after an Australian silent movie star,

saying Pollard was her married name, though. You know, but her married name to the guy who died in the war. Yeah. Oh, so she's free to marry him. Yes. She told him her husband died in the war and her parents were dead as well. She told him she was a spy in the war, just as she told her parents. What's confusing to me as well is that her dad was like,

okay, so you're going to go see Alec. That's great. Do you need money? And I'm thinking like, do you need taxi money? Yeah. Do you need like a few bucks? But he obviously gave her a chunk of cash. Yeah, she's like, I need $15,000 right now.

Okay, no worries. Sure thing, sweetie. Obviously I need taxi money there and back. Just good to have you back. That is another thing that maybe is a bit confusing because, you know, it's not like she's desperate and on the run because she has no other options. She has a comfortable living at home.

Yeah. Her dad is willing to give her the world pretty much. He's doing well in business with his cotton stuff going on. And, of course, you can sort of look at it and go, well, there's obviously things going on for her psychologically and all that. Of course, you can be sympathetic to that. But she is callous. Yes.

Like postnatal depression doesn't make you do this. No, I wouldn't have thought so. This is horrendous. Yeah. And to still somehow be like, Billy, you dog. I know. Just make up a new name and meet this new guy. Oh, he's Australian.

Good. I need a fresh start. There's nothing for me here other than my child, first husband, and a loving family. Second husband. And third husband. This is her fourth now because she, the guy, she just spent all his money and left within days.

Oh, yeah. That's all we talk about him. There's so much in here that Al Spurges is not mentioned again. Sorry Al.

And an incredible name. We didn't give him the respect he deserves. I mean it's amongst many great names in this story. Incredible.

But we're up to Captain Giblets. Giblet. I don't know. We're on an upward trajectory for sure. Can you call your balls your giblets at

all? Well only in private. How do you know about that? Get a load of these giblets. You know, I say stuff like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. To the mirror. Improv to the mirror.

Ah, ah, four. And then I gasp. To the doctor. Get a load of these giblets, honestly. And they're like, I just needed your blood pressure. You do not need to take your pants off. You better have a feel of that. Is that normal?

Is that normal? Is that normal, Giblet? So now the war was over, she told Giblet that she was uncertain what she would do. Captain Giblet fell for the eloquent brave war widow and her story and when she suggested marriage he happily agreed. It was time to celebrate life after the war. They married in England before setting sail for Sydney. Oh that's fun. In Australia where Ethel began her life as Mrs Daphne Giblet in a weatherboard house Norm built for them. According to Nichols, ethel really wanted

this marriage this new identity this new shot at life to work but she wasn't prepared for how dull life would be in the outer suburbs of sydney especially as norm kept a tight string on their finances she's like perfect life apart from the fact that i'm used to sort of she's like she's very used to freewheeling lifestyle so all of a sudden being in another country in the suburbs and, you know, I guess living in what is nearly the 20s, I don't know.

I'm not sure what it was like, but I'm guessing housewives' lives weren't that. Yeah. If she'd held onto that house in Sydney, she could sell it for $80 million today. Oh my God, it would be worth so much. Yes.

Wow. So she'd be rich today. Just saying. What an idiot. million today. Oh, my God. It would be worth so much. Yes. Wow. So, she'd be rich today. Just saying. What an idiot. Just saying. Stuffed up there. Stuffed it. Eventually, Ethel convinced Giblet that life in the Sydney suburbs wasn't for her, and

he rented an inner city apartment for her to live in, and he visited her on weekends. He got visitation. She was like, hey, still love love you just don't want to live with you you can come visit though get me a nice spot a bit closer to town uh ethel wrote to her dad telling him because the last thing her dad's heard is she's just popping over to visit alec and coming back she's like wow they've obviously made up yes she's living with alec now so ethel wrote to her dad telling him she met with alec, which she didn't, but it didn't go well. And then said, but after it didn't go well, I'm married and Australian and I'm now living in Sydney.

Which he would have been like, what? What? Also, doesn't he live quite close to Alec and can probably confirm that story did not happen? They're both in the same town. Alec, did you see her by any chance? No, absolutely not. Why are you lying to me, Alec? Why are you lying to me, Alec? You're not like that Billy. You know about Billy. I don't know.

He's been watching the whole time. So yeah, and she obviously she left out the detail of that other little marriage in between. Yeah. She's been married twice since he last saw her. Oh, my God. Honestly, I know a lot of people say, like, you love your children unconditionally. I think if this was my child, I'd be like, I don't have a lot of love left.

I don't like you very much. You know? Yeah. She's a big old disappointment. Wow. They're strong words from a mother. You made? Yeah. She's a big old disappointment. Wow. They're strong words from a mother. You made yourself laugh. I'm picturing you as a mother to a five times married war widow.

I'm like, I can see it. Honestly, this is disappointing at this point. This is, you're furious. Yeah. Sitting at home in Manchester. So, she and her dad started becoming regular pen pals. Her updating him on life in Australia and her on life in England. Three years into their marriage, hey?

Not bad. Not bad. Pretty good. Giblet found the letters and asked who Frank Swindells was. His name was on the thing. She neatly tied them up at her apartment. Yeah, right. found the letters and asked who frank swindells was his name was on the thing that was she neatly tied them up at her apartment yeah right and uh they were just on a desk he said oh who's frank swindells and uh she picked up the bundle of letters ran to the fireplace and threw them in

the fire that's not suspicious at all no she's so good at telling stories and getting people to believe them. You couldn't say an uncle? Yeah. She throws him in the front and goes, sorry, what was your question? I didn't hear it. Did you say something? Just something I had to do.

Sorry, is that the kettle? Yeah, I thought it was just a little cold in here, you know? I thought we'd get the flames going up a little bit. Anyway, I love you. Can you go home now? It's my apartment. My apartment. Single bed only.

It made him a little more sussy. Like, wait, what's going on? And eventually she came clean about everything. Well, pretty much everything, including the fact that she was already married before marrying him. Giblet immediately filed for divorce. Look fair. Fair enough.

I'd be pretty upset, I think. You're one of my three current husbands. Okay. Okay. Okay. But, I mean, the others are in a different country, so they're not a threat to you, baby. We can work it out, babe. Baby.

Baby. Yeah. I need my apartment. Ethel then reverted back to the name Daphne Pollard, probably laughing about it, as she did. Such a funny name. And she moved into the stylish Australia Hotel, which is where that wedding reception was.

Within weeks, she was engaged to another decorated soldier, Captain Midford Stanley Horn. Captain Horn. That's good. That's a good name. He can be in our porno. Yeah. He can be in a Captain Porno.

Horn. Captain Horn Porno Porn Captain Horn Captain Porn Is that anything Dave? That's great work Can you work that in somewhere? Fantastic We'll put that in the script

They had a big extravagant wedding But within days She stole his life savings And fled Oh my god Daphne She ended up What?

For a second I'm like Who's Daphne? That's only the funniest name We've I'm like who's Daphne? That's only the funniest name we've ever heard That's right Daphne So I can't remember because I'm always laughing when I think of it She headed back to England where she met and married An Australian businessman named George Anderson

So she's left Australia Yep To go to London And married an Australian Yep And is this marriage number six now or seven? You'd be doing better than me. Yeah, we should have kept track from the start.

I have no idea. Yeah, that feels like in the ballpark. Because then there was also like fake ones just to get the ring slips and then. Yeah, two of the original guys, then that guy Alan, then the captain's giblets. Then the one that she stole, that's five. So this is number six, I think. Yeah, six sounds right. Maybe seven.

So she's now with Anderson. And then six months into their marriage, she had a baby from one of her relationships back in Australia, naming the child Frank again. Wait. Okay. She's named both children Frank. Yes.

There are so many names. Her dad's name's Frank. So she's just naming all of her kids Frank. It seems like that or she's just like, that first one didn't really count. She doesn't really think about it. Oh, my God. So six months into a marriage, she has... Six months into meeting him.

Okay. Is he like, oh, six months? Yeah, I guess that probably would have been a conversation, but he was cool with it and was listed as a child's father on the birth certificate, despite having met Ethel only six months before he was born. Yeah, but it was the 20s. They didn't know how long pregnancy was.

They can go for however long. This one was just cooked alers, done. Ding! Ready to go. That's how good I am. That can go for however long. This one was just cooked ale. It was done. Ding. Not as big. Ready to go. That's how good I am. That's how good I am. I can get a nine-month pregnancy done in six months.

Yeah. You're welcome, babe. You're welcome. The following year, the young family sailed to Shanghai. I'm trying to, so she's currently, what was her name? Anderson? Yeah. Daphne.

Daphne Anderson. Daphne Anderson, yeah. And so... But she's stolen the life savings of one of her ex-husbands. Horn. Horn. Captain Horn. So she's got money now as well. She spends it as soon as she gets it pretty much.

Fuck! She steals a lot of money and just spends it real quick. What's the point? Save, you know. Put 30% aside, Daphne. She hasn't read The Barefoot Investor. Have you not? You've got buckets, right?

All you want to do is... You're putting it all in the splurge account. What you need is a bit of a rainy day situation. Yeah, you've got rainy day. It's wild how much people know those sort of things. At least in Australia, anyway. I mean, I've read The Barefoot Investor. of things. Yeah. Like, that's, at least in Australia anyway. I mean, I've read The Barefoot Investor. You've read The Barefoot Investor?

I've skimmed it. Okay. We can wait for clean water solutions. Or we can engineer access to clean water. We can acknowledge Indigenous cultures. Or we can learn from Indigenous voices. We can demand more from the earth. Or we can demand from Indigenous voices. We can demand more from the earth. Or we can demand more from ourselves.

At York University, we work together to create positive change for a better tomorrow. Join us at yorku.ca slash write the future. So they sailed to Shanghai. Shanghai in the 1920s was going off. It was not like China you think of today. It was metropolitan and party time, jazz bars. Not the China you think of today. Shanghai, one of the largest cities on earth.

Yeah. 25 million people. It was more of like a city. Yeah, it was a place. I know what you're thinking. You're thinking tiny little fishing village. Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. None of that.

The 20s, big old city. And Ethel was living her best life partying at cocktail parties and in smoke-filled nightclubs. How old is she at this point? Well, what are we up to? Into the 20s? She was born in 1997. So, yeah, into her mid-20s.

Mid to late 20s, I guess. She's lived quite a bit. Yes. First marriage at, what, 17? That's right. Oh, that's right, yeah. Seventh marriage at 25. I know, and I forget that some of these marriages are incredibly short-lived,

and there's not much of a courtship. So, yeah, she's packing a lot in. She's not a big quarter. While there in Shanghai, Ethel got pregnant again and headed to England to have her third son. I wish. She went for something different this time. She did. She went William Basil Dwight Anderson.

It's pretty great. And sort of became more known as Basil. Basil. She then sailed back to Australia to meet her husband, George Anderson, and after a long trip, she was angry to find that he wasn't there to greet her. She'd been hoodwinked. He bailed on her. No.

Yeah. This is Billy all over again. Yeah, she's been Billy'd again. Just as she learned to love again. She finally let someone in after Billy had broken her heart. And he didn't turn up. Into a million pieces. And then this guy whose name I've forgotten.

George Anderson. That's why. He's no giblets. He's no fucking giblets. George Anderson. I had a micro sleep when I say his name. Yeah, yawn. So she's like, great hippie here to meet me with holding the sign saying my name, even

though I'm his wife. Yes. And she's just had their child. And we're going to start our life here. Yeah. And he was on the birth certificate for the first child as well, but this one was actually his child. Oh, that's right.

There was two there. So she was thinking, you know, they were going to go start a life that she would soon get bored of and flee. But he fled first. He fled first. He fled first. So, honestly, they're a match made in heaven. Yeah, that's right. They could chase each other around the globe.

Beautiful. If you flee first, they can't flee you. Yeah. That's so true. That's how you protect yourself. That's why I always flee. Never get hurt. You hurt others.

That's right. That's why I punch everyone I meet. Straighten the giblets. You do. Punch first or be punched. That's why you're king of the. Straight in the giblets. You do. Punch first or be punched. That's why you're king of the prison, yeah? Yeah, that's right. According to Nichols, Ethel was heartbroken and angry.

A man had made a fool out of her again. Oh, my God. And she had nothing to show for it. But two young children. Yeah. Well, I mean, that's why this one is. Like, she's not normally... I mean, she's why this one is. Like, she's not normally... I mean, she's stealing all their money.

I was like, she's leaving them, but she's not... She is sort of, yeah, taking all their money. She's lying to them. Yeah, okay. Most of the time, they don't know her actual name. Pretty badass. She's pretty badass. I'm getting a tattoo of this bitch.

She's my queen. Soon after... I after just thinking about that how are this all the story started with uh the great-granddaughter whatever being like i don't know much about great-grandma do you reckon you could look into it and the nichols is like yeah i've come back with a story you're reading going oh no yeah i don't know if i want to she's awful apparently she was well i think she doesn't she doesn't want it her granddaughter was she did a bit of the press for the book release and stuff i think she was like she did some bad things she did some badass things too but she was she was pretty incredible what a great con woman she was living in a man's world yeah she's getting things done yeah but um

yeah so she's she's she was fascinated by it as well but yeah, yeah, Nichols was just like, when I was researching it, she just, like, was obsessed with it for a few years while she was writing it. She's like, she was saying that every time she saw a new thing, she'd yell out to her partner, Greg, I can't believe what I've just read. And she's like, after a while, he's like, all right, we get it. She's a wacky character. Let me guess, she's married someone else. Yeah, that's right.

Greg, you're right. Greg, oh, my God. You're as quick as Dave Warnocky, which is a weird reference. Greg, what's for dinner? Greg would be cooking. Oh, yeah, no doubt about it. Soon after, so she's been stood up. She lands in Australia.

By that fucking dog. Dog. Billy 2, I call him Yeah that's true Soon after she moved in with a man named Mr Baker Baker taught her how to drive Unfortunately for Mr Baker though As soon as Ethel knew how to drive

She packed the boys and their few belongings Into his car and drove it away Holy shit Ethel But he's also got a bit of a tear Because he's so proud Look at how well she's doing. She did a 3.2. Oh my God, that's fantastic.

Nailed it. She's staying so well within the lines. According to Nichols, soon afterwards, Ethel hired a woman called Maggie to take their clothes away for washing and pressing. Maggie took more than their clothing, however. She completely cleaned Ethel out. The conwoman again.

All her beautiful jewelry that had been given to her by various men over the years. The gold wristlet watch from her father. Her gold and platinum twin diamond engagement ring from Stan Horn. A beautiful memento of that brief relationship. Is she wearing all the rings? And that's not a bit of a red flag to any of her new bows. Diamond cluster ring, her emerald engagement ring from Norman Giblet. Her engagement ring from George Anderson with five large diamonds set into the wide gold band.

The golden diamond bar brooch Norman gave her when they finished their house in Thornley. And a gold fountain pen she'd pocketed on the trip to Australia the year before. She got jewellery just for their house being finished. Yeah. That's great. Like a push present, but for a house being built. Yes. So she loved that sort of stuff.

She loved jewellery and bling and that sort of stuff. So she was collecting it as she went. She's a little bower bird. Yes. Do they like shiny things? Blue things. But imagine if they like gold and stuff and you just have pet bower bird. Yes. Do they like shiny things? Blue things. But imagine if they like gold and stuff and you just have pet bower birds that just steal for you. Yes.

That's good. That'd be sick. That'd be a great Batman villain. Could I train my dog to see fat gold? Yes. Goose. Yeah. I think he could be a Batman villain.

My little thief. Put a little balaclava on him. Oh, fuck. That would be so cute. He wouldn't look any different. You wouldn't know what kind of ears he has. Back to Nichols. All her treasures, all her jewelry, gone.

Despite filling a complaint with the local police, all her treasures were lost. To top it off, she hadn't been able to track down her husband, George Anderson. She gone to the police and said, I'm missing seven engagement rings. All mine, I swear. He just really wanted to marry me. Still trying to track down George.

Couldn't do. This wouldn't happen until years later when she found out he was actually already married himself. No. And had other children. Ironically, it found out he was actually already married himself. No. And had other children. Ironically, it turned out he was a bigamist as well. Didn't you say they were a great match? Was that him?

They were the same person. Yeah. Although he went back to his partner, whereas she never did that. Ethel had had enough. She was leaving Sydney. That's it. I'm done. I'm leaving Sydney again.

Curiously, just before Ethel left again, there was an overnight break-in at Thornley, Giblet's house, in the shop of her previous husband, Norm Giblet. Oh, sorry. Yes, not in his house, in the shop. In his shop. Police records showed a full week's trading. Just over 46 pounds was stolen, but no damage reported. Just a coincidence, perhaps, suggests Nichols.

So obviously she almost definitely just robbed her ex-husband. Fucking hell. Who did nothing wrong. No. He did nothing wrong other than file for divorce because she had lied for the three years they were married yeah and so then she gets revenge on him for that had it coming fucking billy or whatever his name is all men are billies not all billies uh ethel and her boys headed south driving and sleeping in the Studebaker

She stole from Mr Baker When they got to Cobargo Around 400km from Sydney Ethel dropped her boys Frank and Basil Off at an orphanage Age 4 and 3 Oh my god After this Ethel sailed back to England

According to Nichols Jess I just gasped After this, Ethel sailed back to England. According to Nichols... Jess? I just gasped. You're laughing at these people for gasping a lot. You've been gasping up a storm over there, young lady. She just dumped her kids at an orphanage and fucked off. Yeah, it was like at a random regional one as well. Cobargo.

Oh my God. Yes. So she god. Yes. So she dropped him off. What a badass. Absolute badass. For sure. Of all the badasses we've talked about she takes the cake

for badassery. Surely I see a Victoria Cross coming up soon. There must be. Is there an award for the woman with the most children named Frank? So after this Ethel sailed back to England Obviously leaving the boys behind According to Nichols Not having much money

She had to travel third class Can you imagine? Poor thing. My heart bleeds for her. They wouldn't even let her on the upper decks. Those dogs. What a pack of billies. She felt disrespected and she vowed to herself that she would never travel in such a humiliating way again.

And that she would sink the ship. I hate her. I just think she's a badass. I'm so humiliated. I've chosen to get on this ship. Left my kids. I sold my kids to be here. I should be up here.

You billies. Fucking billy everywhere. Who do you work for? Is it Billy? Take me to Billy Back in England She told her father About how her husband

Anderson screwed her over And that she'd left her sons In a boys home Frank agreed to send her 25 pounds Approximately 2,400 bucks a month To support her family

And then told her to go back to Australia and look after her sons. Well, she did return, but not before marrying William Lloyd Thompson in Manchester on the way to the ship, I guess. Took all his cash. They split a cab and then she's like, do you want to get married?

Do you want to get married? And can I have your credit card details? So they married in Manchester. She took all his cash and spent it on a first class fare back to Australia, leaving him behind. These trips take so long as well. Yeah. And this is all happening in quick succession, really. The longest gaps are just her on a ship for a bit.

If I do like two international trips in a year i'm like fuck yeah look at me i'm exhausted half my year on a plane because it's so far but you're never in first class oh that's true actually yeah then then i want more yeah this is weeks on a boat and she's just got back dad's sending her so much fucking money. Yeah, ongoing every month. And then back she goes. But do you think she gets on the boat? She's first class now and goes, huh?

Remember me? And they're like, no. No. What? There's multiple boats. Of course not. Yeah. Oh, shit.

Everything's just very impulsive. It's not really thought through. She's definitely not planning ahead at all You could get dad's money By just writing him a letter Yeah Saying he screwed me up Why do you have to go All the way to

Back to London And then Come back to Australia And yeah It's just Obviously just like Very compulsive behaviour as well Yeah

Cause she could She's She's got access to so much cash And she has And I mean Even if she hadn't stolen all that money, she could just set herself up and live solo. But, you know, whatever. I don't want to tell her how to live her life.

His husband, Lloyd, just on the docks waving and going, I'll be on that boat soon. Oh, hang on. How's this? Is there a plane coming to pick me up and drop me off on there? Oh, I'll catch up to you somehow. Bye, darling. See you, love.

So all of these men that she's marrying is... Sorry, I'm gasping so much now. I've got hiccups. All these men that she's marrying are now also... Like, they can't really remarry because they're married to her. Yeah, they have to figure out how to... And some of them do get divorced or in all their marriages but yeah some of them are just because i think do you need

her signature on it i don't know i've never been divorced so you have to go one of my proudest achievements is i've never been divorced yeah give it time some of it i think like at least they have to go through a long process and some of it i know i at one point i read one of them got it done pretty quick but another guy was taking him years to figure it out going to courts and whatnot um so once back in australia she collected her blue studebaker and drove to cobago where she left her kids nearly a year earlier she told the nuns she was going to take her boys for a short drive around the countryside,

but she never brought them back. Sort of kidnapping them. So she couldn't just take her own children back? Yeah, I don't know. She had to trick them into... It sounds like it, or is she just... That's just how she did things. They were like, you can have them.

They're your children. They're your kids. Well, honestly, it's rare the parents come back. So we're thrilled to see you. Please take your children. She's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Just visiting. They'll be back.

Just going for a little drive with the boys. The boys love a drive. Saying hello to the boys. We got them, boys. You're coming back with mummy for now. So the family then moved to Elwood in the suburbs of Melbourne. She liked it there, being near St Kilda with the Palais Theatre and Luna Park. It reminded her of Blackpool in England, which she had a lot of fond memories of.

Was that the Palais recently? Yeah. Remember we were going to do a live show at the Palais? Yes. Whatever happened to that? COVID. COVID. Yeah, COVID.

There was a podcast festival that got cancelled. Yeah, it's great. Because I was watching a as a neil young tribute show kind of with some aussie rock legends in a little super group and it was great and i'm like this theater's so sick it's so great and i think cram maybe mentioned that um and reminded me i'd forgotten about it that developers were gonna knock it down and build apartment buildings there. It's like, wouldn't that be, what a waste that would be. But yeah, apparently that was close to happening.

Got saved, got a lick of paint, it's looking great. If you love it so much, you could live there. If you love it so much, why don't you marry it? That's a good point. And Ethel did. She fleeced that building for all it's worth. So they're now living in Elwood. She probably tried to fuck Luna Park or something.

Oh, yeah. That big mouth. That's why I've got such a good grin. So she lied about her boys' ages so they could be enrolled in school. So she said they're older than... She was saying they're older than they are. That one's 17. That one's 15.

Well, they're like four and five now or something. They were three and four. And she's like, they're all good too. Yeah, no, you should give them a job at the bank here. Because she doesn't want to actually have to look after them. But so if you can send them off to school most of the day, you can do nights and weekends. Mothering, easy.

Piece of piss. Piece of piss. So, yeah, she sent them to school and then started spending her day shopping. Piece of piss Piece of piss So yeah She sent him to school And then started Spending her day Shopping Not always paying

And often using Checks that would bounce Under the name Gloria Ethel Gray Ethel found herself In court once again She took the name Gloria Gray

Based on An American actress Of the same name Who she was Fashioning herself on now So she obviously She just She wants to be a Hollywood star. She's never made any sort of effort to go towards Hollywood or do any acting.

Is it like now me walking around and being like, yes, I'm Tom Cruise. And then people going, oh, well, I like the actor. And you're going, yeah, amazing coincidence. Parents hadn't heard of him. Named me Tom. Yeah, that's the weird thing. To some people it seems like she's going no i'm actually tom cruise and then other people like yeah funny coincidence

no relation but uh we're both stars in our own ways anyway i'll be paying for this in check um so after the trial the jury deliberate uh deliberated for four hours before finding Ethel guilty on two counts of fraud. But they asked the judge to be lenient in sentencing as Ethel was a single mother. She copped a 50 pound fine and a three year good behavior bond. From there, she moved to Adelaide as Lady Betty Anderson. Lady. Yeah, she gave herself a title. Betty Anderson.

Upgrade. Lady Betty. Lady Betty. Did she take the kids? anderson lady yeah she gave herself a title betty anderson upgrade lady betty lady betty uh did you take the kids uh yes she's with the kids she's with charles and um she was also known there as mrs gardner uh after joseph gardner who she was now living with so she had a couple couple of aliases on the go ethel started accruing fraud charges after conning various businesses out of goods and services she dressed posh told people what they wanted to hear and was seemingly able to charm anyone it's a funny thing like you know i'm rich why would i steal from you that's sort of the yeah the logic and it worked for a time after time. Yeah. She was kind of rich, though, as well.

Like, yeah. She was charged multiple times, but didn't show up to court on numerous occasions. That's a good way to dodge it, actually. Yeah, that's right. Just don't turn up. Yeah. How can they sentence you if you're not there? You can't be sentenced if you're not there. Sentence doesn't count if you don't hear it.

They're always like, fuck, they're good. She's so good. He's getting away. Instead of showing up, she'd just move. Brilliant. Love that. Foolproof. Jeez, crime in the olden days was so much easier.

Pre-internet, and you just go. Now you'd be like, it'd just be on every database, photos of her. Goes by, who knows what name she goes by. I've got a lot of different names I thought that I would have thought that at the start of the story

but then there's also times where there's like seven people from like different post offices being like yes I've seen her that's true have they found all these people

or land ladies being like oh I've been keeping a little book of notes on this lady yeah what a creep all these these people that are just dying to testify

yeah yeah true just to do something it was really boring it was boring back then on this lady. Yeah, what a creep. All these people that are just dying to testify. Yeah, true. Just to do something. It was really boring. It was boring back then. Yeah, it was very boring. Well, like we started the story, there were just strangers who wanted to be

at the front of this wedding of these people and I don't think I said the line, maybe I'll say it later, but apparently they were all excited as every limo rocked up and guests came out, and they were like, wow, who do you think that is?

They didn't even know who they were. They were just like, wow, speculating. Imagine who that could be. I bet they're important. Oh, my God. So funny. Humans have done some truly amazing things, and then sometimes you're like, why do we still exist?

Why doesn't a media just knock us all out you know one can only hope fingers are crossed i would welcome the sweet sweet release um so she was charged multiple times but didn't show up to court on numerous occasions. I've already said that, haven't I? Yeah. So after being a no-show to court, she forfeited a 50-pound bond. Her passport and checkbook for the account her father was depositing money into was also taken. These were all in police custody.

So she just... Like this one thing, she had to like guilt-free, if you can feel guilt free about your dad Just paying for you to live This money just coming to her You can because he's a dog Remember that Oh that's right

Take the money of the dog He's absolutely dog to you But yeah she's By not showing up to that court She loses it She can't access that money anymore Or leave the country Because she's lost her passport

And the check. Yeah. And the 50 pound bond as well. More and more, she was leaving her young boys for days at a time to fend for themselves, usually leaving enough food. And they'd take themselves to school and back and there'd be food there. Apparently, they'd come home and they'd see how much food there was. And they were like, oh, she's gone for two or three days. And they could tell by the amount of food.

That's so sad. But then one time there was no food and she didn't come back. She didn't come back for days until luckily her neighbours noticed they came by and the boys were taken by child welfare. She left Adelaide without them, heading to a country town to work as a live-in nurse for an elderly woman named Mrs Hunt, now known as Nurse Florence Anderson.

She worked for Mrs Hunt for nine days, collecting a wage as well as a bunch of Hunt's jewellery before heading back to the Victorian border. This was a thing she used a bit. She had this story. I was a thing she used a bit. She had this story. I was a nurse in the war. I love looking after sick people. I love it.

That's all I'd like to do. So I'll look after your mum. Where's her jewellery? No reason. I just, you know, sometimes I think, you know, people say laughter is the best medicine. I disagree. I put all of a woman's jewellery her, and it just makes her feel good.

I mean, if you look a million dollars, you'll feel a million dollars. I'm sorry. Which one of us was a nurse in the war? Correct. Me. Yes, thank you. So, point me in the direction of your mother's jewelry, please. And go, because I've got it from here.

I want you to go and relax Yes Far away That's what I'm here for I'm here to take the pressure off you And off this safe Which the combination is I'm going to need you to give me a three, four day head start

I mean I mean I'll do I'll do Don't worry I'll leave Your dog is in great hands No it's my mum Yeah your mum whatever Don't worry, I'll leave. Your dog is in great hands. No, it's my mum.

Yeah, your mum, whatever. I'll leave four days of cruscits on the table. Cruscits? She'll sort herself out. She can find a spread or something if she wants it. I don't know what's wrong with a plain cruscit. Some people say they're dry. I'll say, get a glass of water. All right, I'll leave a glass of water Alright I'll leave you some water

Jeez High maintenance So next Ethel Headed so she Left Mrs Hunt and headed to Ballarat where she morphed into Mrs Horton the wife Of real person Sir Samuel

Horton someone she'd never met A wealthy Sydney businessman You might know the Horton Pavilion in Sydney That's named after him Okay As Mrs. Horton Ethel went around town collecting goods and services Under the pretense that her rich husband

Was soon coming to town to fix everyone up Oh don't worry My husband, Sir Horton He'll come and fix us up in a few days She's going to the bakery like I'll have one cream bun Don't worry Mr. Horton Sir Horton will he'll come and fix this up in a few days. She's going to the bakery like, I'll have one cream bun. Don't worry, Mr. Horton, Sir Horton will be here in a couple of days to fix up my account for this cream bun.

It'll be the first thing he does is goes around and visits all the little shops I've been in. Actually, I'll have a Boston bun for the road. Once again, Mr. Horton will be paying for that. Who's falling for that? Because the thing is, they're like, oh, my God, he's got a famous businessman. He'll come to my shop. So I should walk in and say, hello, I'm Jessica Packer. Carrie Packer's wife.

He'll be here tomorrow to pay for this gold chain and Boston bun. Isn't it a strange shop you have? Jewelry and buns, my two favourite things. I shall be your finest customer. Kerry will be very happy with this indeed. My son James loves Boston Buns And my daughter-in-law Mariah Carey She loves a tart

Do you have any tarts? Portuguese tarts She loves my daughter-in-law, Mariah Carey. Mariah Carey married James Packer. No, they were engaged for a time. I think they were briefly engaged. Wow. I know.

What a scoop. Heard it here first. Yeah. Something that happened several years ago. Sorry, it's over. So she's in Ballarat as Mrs. Horton. I feel like grandma lives. I wonder if she was duped.

Oh, my goodness. So she loved telling her various backstories to the shopkeepers of Ballarat. Unfortunately, though, she told slightly different ones to them all and they liked telling her stories to each other as well. Amazing that she would think you could get away with that because other people don't talk to each other. Like, other humans to her just exist. They are completely still and in place when she's not there.

And then they come to life when she approaches them. And then she can say whatever she wants or do whatever she wants. And then she walks away and they just little cardboard cutouts again. Like she just had to tell the same story. The audacity and the stupidity is frustrating. Yeah. Sometimes these con people we hear about are very, very good at it. And they get better at it. She's not getting better at it. Yeah. Sometimes these con people we hear about are very, very good at it and they get better at it.

She's not getting better at it. Yeah. I feel like they normally haven't been to jail once by this point. Yeah. She's in and out of court. And then according to Nichols, in less than a week of arriving in Ballarat, the florist who supplied her with fresh flowers daily. So, she's conning this poor woman out of daily fresh flowers for some reason.

Why do you need them every day? Put them in water. They'll last a few. I think it's because, yeah, she sees herself as worthy of everything. You know, she is Kerry Packer's's daughter after all or whatever she was um so yeah so the florist loved to tell the story of the lovely miss horton to the milliner uh namely that the rich lady had been a nurse in the great war on the western. The milliner was certain the florist must have been mistaken, though, as a charming new rich client told her she had worked for the war office and travelled incognito to

the continent. The milliner was delighted at having sold an expensive black crocodile skin handbag to such an esteemed person and was looking forward to receiving the funds from Sir Horton himself. Any day now. Sir Horton's coming to town. I'm looking forward to being paid for this item. I cannot wait to be paid for this.

It's going to be a real honour. Annoyed that the milliner was calling her mistaken, the florist confronted Miss Horton when she passed by her shop the next morning. Ethel assured the florist it was in fact her friend the milliner who had the fax wrong, then immediately set about leaving town. Owing money to the boarding house, the florist, the taxi driver, the hairdresser and the milliner who had the facts wrong then immediately set about leaving town owing

money to the boarding house the forest the taxi driver the hairdresser and the milliner ethel learn her lesson stick to one story in a country town a fucking idiot a lot of that idea of her being like oh you've yeah no you've got it right she's got it wrong so embarrassing anyway and just running out of the building arriving in melbourne Ethel was at a loss as to what to do next. So she decided to head to Perth, Western Australia. Yeah. Come to Melbourne and then go, well, what do I do next? Well, I mean, first of all, take in the laneways and the coffee culture.

How about that? A little bit of art at the NGV. See a game at the G. Yes. Sporting capital of the country country or at least the state uh without the money to sell first class ethel charmed away into the governor general's entourage as famed english opera singer eva turner that's pretty okay that's i'm impressed by that yeah like the governor general if for people outside of Australia,

that's kind of like our king or queen. Is that right? So representatives. Yeah, representative of the queen. And, yeah, has the power to sack the prime minister, but that's only ever happened once, right? I'm saying that right? As far as I know. Yeah.

Jess's great uncle wasn't sacked no it wasn't sacked he lost his job due to incompetence yeah okay okay like an honorable man yeah you got to do an episode on him one day i would but i don't understand politics okay so i've tried reading about it i'm like what does this mean? We should get like Tom Ballard in to do an episode of that. Yeah, that'd be great. Or I'll still do the report, but I'd need somebody like Ballard to explain everything to me. What did that sentence mean? So Labor is one of the major parties.

Is that right? So she conned her way onto the ship with this story. She's opera singer Eva Turner, a real famous English opera singer. When on the ship, she found an empty cabin and travelled first class as Turner. So luckily it was just an empty cabin. She's like, I'll take that. Now, can you see any possible issues here? The real Eva Turner.

Or are they going to ask for a bit of entertainment? Yes, exactly. From the real Eva Turner. The real Eva Turner's right behind her. She's behind you. Going, ahem. So they do, they go, so what an honour to have a famous opera singer on board.

Please, would you do us the honour of singing for us? Now, I think you would just say that you are recovering from something. I'm on vocal rest. But I also think that she is wild enough to go, all right, I'll give it a crack. What I would do is I would go full diva because I'm not wrecking my own reputation, am I? Yeah, that's right.

I just feel like, no, how dare you? I am just travelling. Yes. I am on vocal rest. Of course I won't do that. I'll be in my chambers. Good day. Sure, I've been talking nonstop.

Yeah. But this is how I vocal rest. Vocal rest starting now. It's a gentle vocal rest. You were right, Dave. She spun a great story about having a throat infection. Oh, okay. And the others, then they bought it.

They backed down. Arriving in Perth, she found the city dull and headed straight back to Melbourne. Oh, my God. See? It's such a long trip. That's such a long trip. What would have been back then? I guess like on the boat.

So we've gone all the way around. Holy shit. So probably like a week or something maybe i have no idea two days seven weeks it would take a while i think that would take a long time maybe a few stops yeah oh yeah true let's stop along the way and also boat is that the most direct it was a long time ago i guess sure now we can fly even that's cumbersome honestly i would have just flown jet star if i was her yeah but then no first class no first class you can't you ain't the first and the time difference is a bit you know really gets you doesn't it yeah bloody hell according to nickels again using a movie star named gloria gray she plied her trade

in only the best establishments cashing checks checks from a bank account, she had opened with only one pound and obtaining numerous luxury items. When things got a bit hot in Melbourne, she dyed her hair a different shade and traveled up to Sydney. Under the various names of Florence Dunkley, Elizabeth Gardner, Elizabeth Anderson, Elizabeth King, Lady Betty Anderson, Anderson, which is my favorite. Anne. Anne Durson. Lady Betty Anderson Anderson Which is my favourite Florence Ann Durson That's so good Ann Durson

She's just At this point She's begging to be She's mocking them Questioned Yeah Absolutely My name is Ann

Durson Okay Oh my god You look a lot like Lady Betty Anderson No no no, no. No, I'm Anne. No relation.

No relation. People get us confused sometimes. No, I'm Anne. Disson. My surname is Disson. But also, the list hasn't ended. She also went by Florence Disson, Gloria Gray, and Pamela Pilkington. Gloria Gray and Pamela Pilkington.

And she took Sydney by storm, passing valueless checks from the city to ride in the quieter northern beach suburbs, all new areas for her. So she was being clever in that way. She wasn't going back to areas she'd worked in before with other names. She even managed to convince one gullible jeweler that she was Mrs. Fingleton,

the wife of a member of the Australian cricket team. He happily gave her a large cameo brooch on credit, never to see the delightful cricketer's wife or brooch again. Soon she was on the move again, like as she always was heading South. She stopped by Goulburn, which is where Bron Liversy, who suggests this topic, is from.

That's right. Maybe, I don't know, maybe met a guy at Bron's dad or something. Goulburn, of course, being the future home of the big merino, which we mention semi-regularly on this show for some reason. There she was arrested for evading taxi fares luckily she was arrested under the name gloria gray which was a name she hadn't used much in new south wales so they didn't realize she had a large criminal history and was granted bail after which she did a runner back to melbourne this is the beauty of all the different names every time she's arrested

like oh you've got you've perfect Yeah, this is my first defense officer. We don't even have any record of you, so you're obviously a model citizen. Yeah, you're all good. Not even a birth certificate. Never heard of the surname Disson before. It's beautiful. Beautiful name. For a boy or girl.

Boy or girl. Another of her popular aliases at the time was Judith Anderson. The real Judith Anderson was an actor only seven months older than Ethel and was recently working in the uk opposite legendary actor lawrence olivier one of ethel's favorites i mean okay the small flaw in the plan of picking a famous actor is if you're aware for the actors you probably are also aware of what they look like right yeah that's right and it's yeah so it feels like surely you want to have names that aren't memorable as well yeah but i guess if they're fake names doesn't really matter but yeah it's strange um as judith ethel stopped in at albury on the victoria new south wales border

and cashed a dodgy check for 20 pounds about a thousand bucks with an unsuspecting shopkeeper she loved the thrill of fooling people and believed that if she did a good enough job the people she conned would be too embarrassed to tell the police days after arriving back in melbourne though ethel was recognized by a saleswoman who she'd previously conned the police were notified and ethel was arrested according to nickels ethel was headed back into the court system this time in Victoria, with 25 different charges of acting under false pretenses against her. It seemed that there were at least 25 people in Victoria who weren't too embarrassed to tell the police about how they'd been duped.

The case was heard in the first week of June 1934. So whatever, she's now 37. Is that right, Dave? Yep. She's so young with florence elizabeth ethel anderson uh being charged under the name of gloria gray after laying down the foundations of her story her lawyer tried to turn the blame onto the shopkeepers telling the judge that they should expect little sympathy sympathy from the court these trades people were as much to blame for having given

her credit as she was for having pressed past bad checks the judge who somehow also happened to be ethel's lawyer's father agreed saying he never ceased to wonder at the gullibility of trades people in the city who accepted good appearances and manners and who were ready to give credit and cash checks without first making proper inquiry he thought they were to blame for their gullibility, but qualified this by saying he did not think they should be exploited. Ethel was found guilty of 10 of the original 25 charges and sentenced to six months in Pentridge Prison. Isn't that wild?

Is that the thing that is allowed where a judge or not is yeah on it surely not right no but you still got six months so pentridge for people from manchester that's our strange ways yeah that's right so um a few uh well-known pentridge inmates from over the years include ned kelly we did a just did a report on years back mark chopper re-Reed, Squizzy Taylor and Ronald Ryan. Ryan, do you know the name Ronald Ryan? Yeah, was he the last person? Yeah, that's right. He was the last man executed in Australia.

I didn't realise this. He was hanged in D Division of Pentridge on the 3rd of Feb 1967. So, yeah, I knew he was the last guy executed but it feels quite recent and I didn't realise it happened you know what like five minutes from where we are right now yeah

pretty cool I know how you love being involved in a story every time she comes back to Melbourne my heart is a flutter that's where I live. And Pentridge is no longer a prison. It's now apartments and a shopping centre. They did to it what they were trying to do to the Palais.

Yeah. It's funny to be like, oh, this is where people used to get hanged. Anyway, want to see a movie? Yeah, let's go to the cinema. I see a sign near work every day. It's like an advertisement for store your wine in a lovely cell at Pantry. So they now have the,

that's how small the cells were. Right. Wine cellars. So you can pay to have your wine stored there. Every time you want a bottle of wine, you have to make the trip down to the prison. You got to sign the papers, get them released,

pay the bail. to make the trip down to the prison. Yeah, you've got to sign the papers, get them released, pay the bail. What do you call it when a suburb goes from... Gentrification. I've never heard of a bigger example of gentrification than prison cell to wine cellar. Yeah. That's incredible.

During her time in Pentridge, Ethel had an altercation with a fellow inmate, which left her with a permanent limp. Oh, dear. Jess, was that you? Yeah. I shanked her in the hip. She walked in.

Get ready, shaken. Get ready, shaken. That's what I said. That's my catchphrase in prison. Have you seen that movie? Shawshank Redemption. Shawshank Redemption. It's a Shawshiv redemption. Yeah? Shawshank Redemption. Shawshank Redemption. It's a Shawshiv Redemption.

Yeah, Shawshiv. It's called something. Anyway, I'm going to stab you now. I can't remember what it's called. It's pretty good. Pretty good, though. Check it out. Andy Dufresne.

I love Morgan Freeman. Hello, I'm Jess. Sorry about the shanking. If she was around now, there's some of the names she'd be using. I'm Morgan Freeman. Yeah. Andy Dufresne. Andy Dufresne.

Shank Freeman. Shank Disson. Free man. So leaving prison, she once again headed for Sydney with the plans of then heading back to England. But she was broke so in the following three weeks she duped three more victims posing again as nurse florence anderson within days of arriving and telling her war nurse stories she was gone with their cash oh my god once in sydney she found the newspapers filled with stories of the australian cricket team heading over to England for the European summer.

It was the 1934 tour, Don Bradman, and they went over and ended up, spoiler alert, but ended up, the Aussies got it done in the ashes over there. The Aussies, they got it done, they brought it home. They brought it home. Well, I don't know if they're allowing us to bring it home still. It's that weird thing where England's like, no, the trophy's too delicate to travel on your little boat, so we'll keep it here.

Do they give you a ribbon or something? They give you a little ribbon, yeah. Oh, that's nice. I like that. I love a ribbon. Easy to store. Put that in a drawer somewhere if you want. So Ethel read that the team were heading over on a ship called the RMS Orford.

She packed herself ready for the trip and boarded the ship without a ticket, planning just to talk her way onto the journey like she had done on the on the ship to perth and this is just because the cricketers are going over yeah she wanted to go back to england anyway but this is also like getting there with the you know she's always wanting to be in there with the society set or whatever they well what's her lie i'm don bradman yeah okay donna bradman call me don so she She boarded the Boarded the ship

And was swiftly ejected Into the sea It happened really quickly Like Out of a cannon Into the sea They put her in a seat And ejected it

Yeah Right this way madam Undeterred She jumped on the next ship That was heading Rejected it. All right, this way, madam. Kadoosh. Undeterred, she jumped on the next ship that was heading to San Francisco. Just another place. She's like, that'll do. She had a little bit more success, once again, posing as the opera singer Turner. But she was found, within a few days, she was found out and turfed from the ship in New Zealand to waiting police officers.

As she was being escorted from the ship, she said to the captain, I will not be recommending your ship to my friends. You don't have any friends. That was a good line. She doesn't have any friends. She only has ex-husbands. The shipping company didn't press charges and she was shipped back to sydney that makes it sound like in a packing crate or something but uh and then she she got when she got off in sydney the press were there and she was loving it they're like how'd you get on and what happened

how do they treat you and she was like loving telling her story to the to the journalists which seems like not clever stuff for someone who's trying to evade yeah being noticed and stuff you want to have my do you want my picture taken for the paper sure show everyone the corn yeah here's my many names um next she went to brisbane uh and then when she arrived uh she met mr balfour. She soon moved in with him and began calling herself Betty Balfour or Lady Betty Balfour.

Lady Betty Balfour. Both of those names were names of real famous people at the time. Unfortunately, Mr. Balfour was a bit of a violent burk and after he hit her,

Ethel decided it was time to move on taking his checkbook. That one felt pretty good. Reading that one, I'm like, yes, Ethel, fucking take that checkbook. Fuck that guy. She headed back to Melbourne. She must be in transit between the eastern capital cities of Australia

more than anything else in her life. Yeah. I think she's been in Melbourne more times than I have. And I was fucking born here. It's beautiful to arrive here, been in Melbourne more times than I have. And I was fucking born here. It's beautiful to arrive here back in Melbourne. So when she was in Pentridge, she had a tip that there was this dodgy justice of the peace if she ever needed forged documents.

So she went back down to Melbourne to meet this guy. They weren't able to say his name in the book. They gave him a pseudonym. So obviously it was... He was, obviously, he was a legit guy and for some reason still unable to say his name. Wow. For a large fee, he organized her a fake birth certificate so she could apply for a passport and head to England. She now had a new name,ela Judith Eve Harvey And a new age 29

So she dropped Nine years Nice Apparently when she On the next trip Someone was like Like visibly shocked At her age

She had to laugh it off That's brutal Oh that Oh that hurts Yeah that hurts 29 What They gasped

Oh my god Who are you kidding You are decrepit Oh, that hurts. Yeah, that hurts. 29? What? Like, gas. Oh, my God. Who are you kidding? You are decrepit. Oh, my God. You've lived. Oh, my God. I'm going to get you on a skincare routine. This is not right.

Your face is fucked. Have you heard of sunscreen? Oh, man. I would have said 45. You look terrible. Oi, Oi, Meryl, come over here. Look at this freak. You are leather.

Show her the passport. Show her the passport. 29. I've seen skin, hairless cats that look younger than you. Oh, the wrinkles. Oh, my gosh. Who do you think you're fooling, you stupid woman? Anyway, pleasure to meet you. Anyway, pleasure to meet you.

Yeah, great to meet you. I'm king of the moon. See how stupid I sound. So as Pamela, Judith, Eve, Harvey, and a new age. I literally can't remember her real name. Ethel. Ethel. Beavers.

Swindles. Ethels. Of course. Swindles. Of course. So she was ready to head back to England Apart from the fact she didn't have enough money To travel there first class

So if she didn't have enough money to travel there first class Great so you just go third class is what you can afford It's the honest way No instead she went to New Zealand Which is where she could go first class According to Nichols on the ship to Wellington Ethel befriended Mr and mrs mctaggart mctaggart formally introduced ethel to the guest speaker mr william corradine at 55 he was 16 years

older than ethel and 25 years older than her alias eve a single civil engineer he had recently sold his share of a ceylon tea plantation and and was heading back to Britain to undertake some consultative work at Whitehall before officially retiring. What kind of work? Consultative. Oh, that's just fun to listen to. Yeah. How would a normal person say that? No, I think that's right.

It was a joy. Consultative. It feels like I added a syllable. Yeah, that can't be right. Maybe some consulting work. Yeah. Nah, consultative. Look, I'm quoting direct from Nichols here.

Dave, have a go. Try saying it though. Consultative. How fun was that? It is fun to say. And I must say, Nichols does like to add a little bit of flair to stories, words.

I love it. Yes. I love it too. Big fan of Nichols. Big fan of Nichols. Holy shit. What a story. I want to read this book now

and I know everything yeah you know it was i've been listening to it uh reading it in the day and then listening to it at night sort of catching i'll listen to it at night and fall asleep so i'm like all right i'm gonna have to read that to catch it up but um uh so yes so he he was undertaking some consultative work before retiring. To Ethel, Mr. William Alexander Corradine was too good an opportunity to miss. Of course. Once again, Ethel had a chance at a life free from deception, relatively speaking anyway.

She was still light about nearly everything. She told him her father had been a doctor at Harley Street, but had died two years before she embarked on a world trip, and she had nursed him through a long, horrible illness. Her mother, a member of the Coates Cotton dynasty, same, still cotton, just a different family a more famous one i guess uh had also died when she was quite young so they had something in common she had never married or had any children all of that lies obviously that's fuck it i mean she's married so many times and

she's dumped a couple she's dumped three children yeah and. And those two were just taken by child services. It seems like she never looked into what happened to them. Why take... Yeah. Yeah, they were probably better just being left at the orphanage, maybe. Why did you have to steal them from the orphanage and then just abandon them? So, yeah. It's so much information in this new relationship she's about to have

that she has to remember. Yeah, it's exhausting. She told him she was keen to head back to England and settle down with him if he was interested. Nichols continues, Mr. Corradine was delighted, and on the 27th of February, 1935, they were married at his uncle's parish church in Rotorua. With a fresh marriage certificate, Eve Corradine, knee Harvey,

applied for a new passport for a new life. They set off for England and Ethel was content. She was invited to all the best Chelsea social occasions, had a rich, respectable husband, a beautiful home she could entertain in freely, and then life took an unexpected turn. At nearly 40 years of age although her husband thought she was about 31 ethel found out that she was pregnant william was ecstatic he was going to be a father ethel was not nearly as excited ethel mary corradine arrived on the 22nd of september

1936 but sadly died only a few weeks later mr corradine was heartbroken filled with grief his health and spirits deteriorated and he officially retired ethel wanted to sell the house saying it was filled with sad memories and that they should move somewhere more gay and start again but all william wanted to do was stay indoors and mourn so ethel took off to the french riviera she'd always wanted to live in the playground of the rich and famous that she'd seen again and again portrayed on film. So she, yeah, she was... She left him there to mourn. She went to party.

She partied in the casinos of Monte Carlo and Nice. She wanted to be noticed and accepted into the scene, but she struggled to make an impression, even with her storytelling, which was... Everywhere else was very good. Yeah. But there, she felt like

a small dull fish in a very big pond instead of becoming a mover and a shaker in the riviera all she succeeded in doing was gambling away all the money her husband had given her for the trip after a third request for extra funds in a month her husband asked her to return home but unbeknownst to him she didn't even have enough money to travel back despite trying her normal cons the people of nice found her ploys transparent they're like we know what you're doing yeah if you're not gonna pay up front fuck off yeah uh luckily she was able to spin a tale to her hotel manager who lent uh lent her enough money to make it back to England. But instead of heading home, Ethel went back to Blackpool, where her scams worked once more, restoring her faith that she hadn't lost her touch.

Oh, my God. So someone said, I'll marry you. She goes, I'm back, baby. Okay, that's a weird response. She successfully hoodwinked people out of goods and services around the country. So she started traveling around hoodwinking again and conning. Just leaving her husband mourning in their house. That's so sad.

That's awful. Until in early July 1938 when she was once again busted, this time for using worthless checks. She thought she'd get away with a slap on the wrist, but unfortunately, Ethel was sentenced to more time in prison. 20 years after first spending time in jail, she was back in the big house again. By this point, she'd been officially married eight times, divorced three times, and she decided to write to her husband, Mr. Corradine, and come clean, at least about her gambling and where she was now,

to write to her husband, Mr. Corradine, and come clean, at least about her gambling and where she was now, and apologising for not coming home, hoping that he would forgive her. Corradine went straight to visit her in prison, wracked with guilt for not sending her more money and blaming himself for her being in jail. He promised to make it up to her. Oh, Mr. Corradine!

He sounds nice. He is nice. Together, they bought a home in blackpool and at ethel's request set her up with a business a stall selling artificial flowers to tourists she's like i wanted someone to keep me busy i want to want a business so um yeah she was she became a flower merchant uh so was ethel finally ready to settle down for real? No In the summer of 1942 she met a man named Thomas Leverthy I don't know if that name rings a bell

No There's been so many fucking names Ethel soon asked a wealthy businessman to the movies From then on they met regularly Ethel felt she had her next husband lined up oh my god about mr corradine well yeah this is so she she had him lined up despite the fact that both she and he were married to other people scandalous stuff liversy was loaded he'd inherited a family fortune worth more than seven million dollars in today's money. Ethel told him she was only still with Mr. Corradine out of loyalty

as his health was now steadily failing. And it started failing since the death of his daughter. And it sort of, yeah, it seemed like he was dying. Soon, Ethel and Livesey were going on romantic trips together to the Isle of Man. In 1943, they stayed at a hotel owned by ellen and leo kane sound like landlords yeah well that's the nosy landlord yeah that's right she's about to become the thing she hated the most ethel set up a meeting with ellen with the hopes of buying one of the hotels ellen was uncomfortable when Mr. Liversy came to the meeting as well.

According to Nichols, Caney pulled herself upright and looked at the pair through her spectacles. I had not realized you were in business together, she remarked. Ethel smiled gently. We are to be married, Mrs. Kane. But you are already married, are you not?

She asked Mr. Liversy. Mr. Liversy? Both of you, two different people, she added, looking between the two. Oh, no need to bother yourself, Mrs. Kanesea. Mr. Liversea, both of you, they're different people, she added, looking between the two. Oh, no need to bother yourself, Mrs. Kane, Ethel assured her. Mr. Liversea here is seeking a divorce and my husband is ill. He won't be with us for much longer. That's the, I guess, the imagined conversation by Nichols.

So, why are you being so nosy, Mrs. Kane? Yeah. My husband's practically dead. He's back at home alone, dying, very unwell. So, maybe. Probably because our daughter died. So, he'll be dead in no time, and I won't be there by his side. So, I'll be well and truly ready to marry, what's your name again?

This guy. This guy. Bozo over here This guy Moneybags McGee Or whatever Yeah Marry this guy Cash or whatever

Yeah So are we Are you selling me a hotel or what? Well Ellen was horrified With this idea that These two married people were Planning to get married

Enough to tell them They could no longer stay at her hotel good but not enough to reject their offer i'll take your money unless you buy the hotel it was decided ethel and liversy would be moving to the isle of man now this is all happening Coridine's Coridine Coridine My heart bleeds for you So Ethel went back By Coridine's bed Until he did die So the last little period

Apparently she stayed by his bedside I take it all back then Stayed by his bedside With a pillow over his face Slowly Mushed into his nose She was so excited Every time he was quiet She was so excited every time he was quiet.

She was like, fine. And then he'd take a breath. She'd be like, fuck! Saliva! On Friday the 15th of October, 1943, he passed peacefully away. Well, that's what we think. But maybe you've just cast the spurs there. He was murdered.

Peacefully. Peacefully. He was murdered peacefully in his sleep. What a way to go. It says that on his grave. Murdered peacefully in Peacefully. He was murdered peacefully in his sleep. What a way to go. He says that on his grave. Murdered peacefully in his sleep. Ethel then sold off

their house and all their household contents withdrew all the money from her late husband's estate and caught the plane to the Isle of Man. She lived with Liversy

at the hotel for a while before moving to a stately home called Ivy Dean. Though Livesey still wasn't divorced, Ethel told others they were married, including her father, who she contacted for the first time in years. Her dad had tried unsuccessfully for years to get in touch with her and his grandsons in Australia. The last he'd heard from her, she was Mrs. Anderson living in South Australia with her sons. And then they disappeared. So this is quite a while earlier.

The two that I really felt for reading this story were Coridine and her dad. Yeah. I mean, there's heaps of people to feel for. But yeah, for some reason, those two stood out. And the boys. So yeah, he finally got back in contact with her and Ethel wrote a long letter from her new home at Ivy Dean apologising for the gap in communication,

saying she had simply been too busy. What? She caught him up on what she'd been up to, though. When I say he got in contact with her, she got in contact with him. I'm sorry him i've been far too busy anyway don't know where the kids are no she told him they were in uh at geelong grammar which is a lie which is like a very prestigious school yeah pretty expensive yeah that's right so she's boarding school what she's trying to be like they're they're great

they're you know well because he he'd been sending her a lot of cash. He'd be like, assume that money that I'm sending to look after the kids. Oh, no, don't worry. They're in the most expensive school in the country.

He'd be like, okay. Wonderful. Great. Can I contact them? No. Absolutely not. Please don't.

They won't remember you. I'd change their names. You can contact them, but they've got different names now. I won't tell you what those names are. No, but they'll know.

If you say, a couple of brothers? Yeah, that's them, but they've got different names now. I won't tell you what those names are. No, but they'll know. If you say, a couple of brothers? Yeah, that's them. Whoever they say. They're really good like that. According to Nichols, the return letter was filled with a father's love and concern. He was delighted she was well and living so close compared to Australia and hoped his grandsons were doing well. He had sad news, though.

Her eldest son, Frank carter had been killed in the ongoing war and her mother had passed away just months before and he was in the process of selling their family home the news of her sons and her mother's deaths did not overly sadden ethel but she did miss her father perhaps he would like to join them on the isle of man he suggested oh she suggested sorry is she the worst person you've ever heard of? I think maybe, yeah. I'm not that saddened by the death of my son. Well, I mean, this is according to Nichols.

She didn't, I don't know exactly know how she gleaned that information. I think she abandoned from days old. So I'm going to say she wasn't all that moved. So March of 1944, Ethel's father moved to the Isle of Man, showing him her life there. He was pleased she was so happy and successful. It sounded like he was a proud dad, despite everything. Dad!

And if you've brought dad along now, how are you going to fuck off suddenly? Because she's going to. She doesn't give a shit about anyone except herself. Oh, she's going to abandon dad. He's moved shit about anyone except herself. So she'll ruin this. She's going to abandon dad. She's moved there. Sporadically, she feels bad. She misses her dad. So I guess she's like, I want to be with my dad.

And then she's not really thinking about how he feels in the large gaps in between. Yeah. Because she's very busy, though. That's right. She's very busy. She's very, very busy. That was one of her names at one point. Busy.

Ethel Busily. Ethel Busily. According to Nichols, both she and Mr. Liversy noticed that he had become a bit fuddled. And on Mr. Liversy's advice, Ethel suggested to her father that Mr. Liversy become his power of attorney and manage his affairs. And all the paperwork involved with selling his home and two other properties in Manchester. Mr. Swindells agreed and signed everything over to his new son-in-law. The only cloud in Ethel's sunny sky was the fact that Thomas Liversy's wife

refused to give him a divorce and was threatening to take him for everything he owned. In the meantime... Sorry, and they've just handed that man... Yep. ...control... Of her father's. he owned. In the meantime... And they've just handed that man control. Of her father's. Hey, so my sort of partner I live with is about to get sued for everything he owns.

Also, Dad, can you hand over what you own to him? He doesn't seem that smart. But they think this through, sort of. In the meantime, Ethel changed her name by deed poll to florence elizabeth ethel liversy hang on what if she just changed her name to his wife's name oh yeah then no need to file for anything now you're two steps ahead and then quietly get her drunk and make her change her name by deed poll to some other bullshit. Yeah. One of her many bullshit.

Maybe Anne Disson. Yeah, she can have Anne Disson. That's yours now. You're welcome. I don't need it. I gave you the best one. Yeah, that is easily the best one. I came up with that myself.

You could have been Daphne, but I gave you Anne Disson. Could have been Daphne Disson, but I gave her Anne Disson. I gave you Anne Disson. Sorry, Anne Disson. Disson. I beg your pardon. I didn't pause. your pardon pause so yeah so she's changed her name by deep pole this is uh back to Nichols this was the first stage in their plan to protect Mr Livesey's assets from his wife and children and by the end of the month all of his assets including five investment properties uh worth over nearly half a million in today's cash,

which is funny because the same land would be worth like a trillion dollars. But somehow property prices have gone up faster than money prices. I'm not an economist. I'm sorry if I said it wrong. No, I think that was right. Sounds right to me. So she had control of all this, and this was to keep it away from his wife,

who wanted to get it. In the meantime, Ethel was living it up, partying, traveling, and shopping. In less than six months, she managed to spend more than 6,000 pounds, over $380,000. Jesus. Just partying, shopping great so hey

your wife's about to get what she deserves uh from you and give it to me and i'll spend it all yeah yeah she's like no matter how whatever the amount of money is coming in she always finds a way to spend more than that that amongst her partying she met a movie maker from the pinewood studios she was starstruck when she found out she was in the biz he was in the biz and she loved the cinema they talked about his latest script idea and how there was trouble with raising funds for the film so ethel said look i'd love to be involved i'll help you out i'll raise the money. To raise the money they sold one of her father's properties at a bargain price but instead of passing the

money on to the movie maker as soon as the money hit their account Ethel started spending it on other things. She was living it up and spending it up but despite now being loaded she was still spending more than she could afford the movie producer returned to the aisle and was drunk at a dinner party a month or so later and he was upset that ethel never came through with the movie money and he told everyone in their social circle that he doubted mrs liversy could lie straight in bed saying he thought she was suffering from delusions of grandeur. She suffers the same malady as Adolf Hitler, he declared. Oh. I mean, I don't like this woman.

But are we going straight to Hitler comparisons? That's a bit of a... That's a stretch. That's a bit of a leap there. He's killing a lot of people. Maybe, I don't know, Dave, is this before Hitler was that bad? We're in World War II, goddammit damn it no i think he was already that bad he was saying adolf hitler you know the student artist yeah have you seen his watercolors they're fucking horrific and she's worse than that she's

worse than that her watercolors are all right i've i've muddled my metaphor a bit here whatever she's a liar drunk she's a liar she's a liar for new listeners when i said to ask dave if this was before it was that bad that was you saying that i was uh i was referencing when dave was gonna turn down matt's microphone here years ago and um yeah for quite a while after that we called him a Nazi. Not sure why you have to bring this up again. Yeah, we've been going for two hours and 20 minutes. Yeah, we don't have time for this, so I request this be struck from the record. Thank you.

So yeah, so he's drunk, this guy, this movie producer, who we don't even know his name. He's going around going, she's no good. She can't lie straight in bed. Is he going back to the Isle of Man just to besmirch her name? I think he was already kind of in that scene, but yeah, at a dinner party, things got out of hand and he got a little loose-lipped. I don't get she can't lie straight in bed.

Yeah. I don't get that. What does that mean? It means she can't tell the truth, but... Can't lie straight in bed. She can't... Yeah, wouldn't it be she can't... She can lie...

Yeah. Yeah. It's too late. I don't get it. It's too late for these questions. It's after midnight, Jess. Did you realise that? Yeah, I realise.

Hey, we're on the home stretch. Don't worry. We're coming home strong here. How many more lives could she possibly ruin? Oh, she'll find a way. Dave, can you... She's ruined mine. Can you explain the can't lie straight in bed?

Is that the saying? It is a saying. I've never questioned it before. Me neither. I've understood what they're trying to get across. I just don't get it. But when you talk about them lying straight in bed... They can't lie straight in bed.

Are you supposed to just lie, like, lying straight in bed. They can't lie straight in bed. Are you supposed to just lie like completely straight in bed? I think just, yeah, talking straight. But they're saying, but the lie part is what confuses it. Yeah. Is it lying down or is it lying like not telling the truth? It's some sort of paradox of a saying. Yeah, you can't truth straight in bed. That doesn't make sense either.

I look forward to the tweets explaining this. I don't. I genuinely do. I won't know what you're talking about, though. We are recording this ahead of time. I will have no idea, but I'll enjoy it. Start it with, by the way, if you want to know, provide the phrase, you know what?

Don't tweet me because I'll probably Google it just after we finish. Yeah, we'll figure it out. So, Ethel stormed out. She's been besmirched at this dinner party. She storms right out of there, leaving her sort of husband, Liversey, behind to make apologies for the both of them. The next day, the producer offered an unreserved apology after she threatened to sue for libel by her lawyer ethel was ready to flee again getting ready to leave she came across her

dad and told him she was leaving to see her boys back in australia who were studying of course at geelong grammar oh my god her dad's just like i'm so happy to hear that yeah uh though in truth she had no idea where they were on top of having liversy's fortune in her name in preparing to leave she also cleaned out most of her father's money to take with her oh you piece of shit leaving just enough to cover his nursing costs don't look at me like that makes it better makes it slightly better she's awful he's done nothing but be yeah i know way too kind to her and she's just been a complete piece of shit real burk and he you know what he's been a bit blinded by you know a father's love but i hope if i'm ever

a father that i'll be able to see through that kid's bullshit. Yeah, well, listen to your wife or your partner because she seemed to be on to it right from the start. That's right. Mum was like, this is crack. She's like, this is bullshit. I'm not taking a word. She was calling it out right from the start. Yes.

And that's why I guess she really, she didn't care when she died. Yeah. Ugh. didn't care when she died yeah uh so she she took most of her dad's cash as well as her sort of husband's stuff and money and properties and everything it were in her name and she flew to london leaving liversy with the last six months of creditors to contend with and no ability to pay them so she she'd been racking up bills and she took all the money that would have become it. Did something awful happen to her? You want something bad?

You know, a bit of poetic justice at the end of this or something? Yeah, I don't want her to die of old age just in her sleep peacefully. I want her to get hit by a bus or something. One of those double-decker London ones? No! Double-decker London.

Yeah, that's right. ways here she comes in london ethel went to australia's high commission to apply for a visa as part of the deal to not sue the movie producer also agreed to pose as a solicitor to sponsor her application as well as back her story that she needed to go australia to australia on sympathetic grounds the was, if he helped her get out of the country immediately, she would not sue. So she'd convinced him of this thing that, surely, how likely is it that she could sue him from drunkenly saying some things at a party? That seems pretty unlikely, but I also didn't think you could get your landlady to get you to go to jail for lying to them.

They fibbed to me. They fibbed to me. They fibbed to me. Now lock them up. Ten years hard labour. You are charged with fibbing. What are you in for? Fibbing. What are you in for?

Murder. Oh, okay. Triple murder. On the same cell block. Oh, this doesn't feel entirely fair. Ethel then paid 10 grand in today's money for first-class tickets to Australia, obviously using her father's slash partner's cash. When the ship docked in South Australia,

Ethel tracked down the two sons she had left behind 12 years before. It was a long time in between. She found Basil. How many cross-cuts had she left them? Three boxes. They were almost on the last crumb. Just in time, mum.

Man, you've made me crave cruscuts. I haven't had cruscuts in fucking years. Yeah, I haven't had cruscuts in so long. So she found Basil, who welcomed her back into his life with open arms. Basil. Basil, I love you, Basil. He was 19 and in search of a job at the time and his mom's like i got heaps of cash i'm gonna buy you a news agency to run so she bought him a news agency and he started

he just started running the news agency great and is he now kerry packer my husband frank on the other hand was harder to find uh it later turned out he was living on the open road working the outback taking jobs wherever he could ethel then moved to sydney where she worked her way into high society with tall tales from her past she told stories with bits of truth in them telling her new wealthy friends that her husband james liversy died in the war even though his name was thomas and he was still alive so it's such a weird, like, slight changes of story. Yeah, so hard to keep track of. She told them she entertained the Duke of Windsor on her yacht on the French Riviera.

The truth was she saw him briefly from a distance. So there's little hints of truth. I once had a postcard with his face on it. I've read that name before. That's it. So, yeah, little elements of truth in there. That person existed, yeah. But the best lies have elements of truth.

That's right. That's right. I saw him once. On my yacht. That's so funny. According to Nichols, Ethel's tales became even larger than life at each subsequent event she attended she was to host and be seen at dinner parties garden parties bridge nights and charity balls where she happily made large donations to all of her friends

charities and repeated her fantastic stories of great wealth with flair ethel was in the society to which she felt she truly belonged. She had money to burn and she was on a roll. And now we're getting back to where we began, the wedding event of the year. But to whom? Well, soon after arriving in Sydney, Ethel was introduced to a civil servant

by the name of Rex Beach. That's right! Rex! Who was from a fairly well off family back in England What's Rex short for? Rexinald Thank you My childhood doctor was Rex

And it's a Is it T-Rex? T-Rex It's short for Tyrannosaurus Apparently according to AlexaAnswers.Amazon.com, Reginald, Rexford and Regis. Reginald. Rexford does make a bit more sense, doesn't it? Yeah, that makes a lot more sense.

Regis. Regis gets called Rex. Reginald makes more sense initially than like Jack to John or something. Totally, yeah. Even though I watched a TikTok recentlyok recently explaining that oh yeah it's this long convoluted story that yeah they would set yeah anyway whatever there's a reason why jack is john um would you believe it there's a reason for it we'll do a report on it one day uh so they uh rex beach and ethel was a bit of love at first sight. Oh, you don't say.

Maybe at least for Rex. Finally a soulmate. Yeah, finally she can settle down. How old is she now? 86? No, it's 45. Her passport says she's 17. Oh my God, you are horrific.

What? Have you got some sort of condition? Oh my God, why are you aging so fast? Are you Benjamin Button? Are you got some sort of condition? Oh, my God. Why are you aging so fast? Are you Benjamin Button? Are you fucked in the face? You got a face like a dropped pie. That's gone mouldy. Oh, my God.

Oh, okay. Mouldy pie they don't eat. With blue cheese? No. Mouldy blue? Just mould. Oh. So, very soon after meeting, they're engaged.

And with all her cash, Ethel wanted to make a big splash with an extravagant wedding. Her wedding ring was being especially designed and contained another 32 diamonds. She also had an extravagant wedding dress made by Edward Molyneux, designer to the stars and creator of royal wedding gowns, and was having it flown in from his studio in Paris.

Flowers were being specifically grown in a hothouse outside of Sydney for a bridal bouquet, as well as bouquets for her four bridesmaids. They were... How does she have bridesmaids? I said the wrong word. I said specifically. Specially. Specially grown.

Yeah, but that's still ridiculous. They were also specifically grown for her, I guess. I think that wrong word. I said specifically, specially. Specially grown. Yeah, but that's still ridiculous. They were also specifically grown for her, I guess. I think that's true. They're just also special. Yeah, I wasn't pulling you up on that at all. Jess, look, I think it was still technically okay. What I was baffled by wasn't specially or specifically the flowers. It was that she had four bridesmaids.

Yes. How does she have any friends? They're all from this group that she's just met in Sydney. Oh, my God. Including her assistant, I believe. And does that not ring any bells for people? Yeah, but we don't know. You didn't...

Oh, well, everyone close to me died in the war, I guess, or they're so far away. Fuck, how good to just be able to blame the war for everything. She's now got two wars to blame. Yeah. God, that must have been nice. How lucky to have lived through two world wars. I've got nothing to blame for the fact that I don't have any friends.

Oh, come on. What? This is a pandemic. True. I lived through that. Nice. No bridesmaids. She organised doves to be released as the bride and groom emerged

and the wedding service itself would feature a full choral choir. Am I saying that right? Choral? Choral. Choral. Full choral ceremony with Australian soprano Miss Jean Hatton and world-renowned Australian flautist Neville Amadio performing. How amazing.

She's previously claimed to be both of those people. Now they're performing at her wedding. But unfortunately, she had misplaced her flute, so could not play. Sorry. The Australia Hotel was booked for the reception with an unlimited supply of the best French champagne and an enormous four-tiered wedding cake

topped with another elaborate floral arrangement was to be the centerpiece of an extravagant buffet. I mean, this is not only her biggest wedding, but probably her, like, first one, even though this has brought her husband up a 10 or something, where there's any kind of ceremony or a party, right? I think she had one, I think, that was pretty big in a church, Maybe a couple. And one of those she left straight after as well. Isn't that wild? Do you think? Yeah, the ones that she's fleeing from straight away.

But one of them was in a church and stuff and she fled. Oh, my God. Another one, I think the giblets, I think, might have been in a church. Right. And actually, yeah, maybe a few of them. But this one, she's gone all out. This is huge, yeah. This one, she's playing the rich person.

Yeah. Where normally she's sort of, no, maybe she's normally some sort of an equal partner. She's always saying she's a bit rich and she's marrying a rich person as well. So, yeah, so it was all stuff that hadn't been since the war, you know. Everything was, you know, rations and all this sort of stuff. So it was a real big hadn't been since the war. You know, everything was, you know, rations and all this sort of stuff. So, it was a real big deal coming out of the war. Do you reckon her son seeing this being like, you bought me a newsagent? I mean, couldn't you have bought me like an oil company or something?

You are so rich. So rich. The tabloids got a whiff of the wedding, which was being touted as the society wedding of the year. A whiff of the wedding, which was being touted as the society wedding of the year. And just before the wedding, the week before, Ethel was interviewed by the Daily Mirror. Ethel proudly showed off an engagement present she received from her friend, Dr. Cunningham, a puppy she named Tingling.

When the reporter suggested it was an unusual gift, Ethel disagreed, saying, not at all. He knew I used to own this wonderful breed back in england before the war i was once offered 3 000 guineas for my best stud dog but he refused of course oh but i refused the dog said that's not enough for me no thank you at a zero and we might be able to talk i'm trying, woof. I'm trying to figure out what 3,000 guineas was, but I think it's like a fuckload of money. Yeah, right. But I couldn't really cook.

But she's just talking absolute shit there. Yeah. Yeah, that's just a riff. She just does not care at all. She again told her imaginary backstory with a few details tweaked here and there. She was then asked about her fiancé and even added a fib to his story saying

he was at the Anzac landing, which he wasn't. He read that and the paper was like, why did you say that? That's weird. She's like, oh, sorry, I got confused. I thought you were. Sorry, one of my husbands was. I thought you were that famous thing. I don't know you that well. Yeah, we met three weeks ago.

I just fill in the details with things that I like. Your favourite colour is brown. Brown. Of all of them. I like brown. No one likes brown. The thing about brown is chocolate, it's coffee, it's dirt. It's all the three of the big ones.

It's shit. The big four. Is that what colour's meant to be? Yeah. I wouldn't know. A gentleman never shits, but I'm surprised I've never seen one The only ones I've ever seen Are those white dog ones

Yeah That sort of crumble When you pick them up That's right Stop picking them up You thought all poo Was white and crumbly Why are you picking them up?

Another one Going through the fingers Never get one back to the lab I don't know what experiments I'm doing but It's getting so late. It's so fucking late. We haven't done this for a while.

Yeah, we know what we've been recording during the days only. And this is the longest report I've ever written. But we are coming to the end of it. How long into it are we, Dave? Two and a half. Over two and a half. Crikey. It's a great story, though.

Holy shit. I'm loving it. How's it going to end? I'm having such a good time. I'm just tired and need to pee. I'm thinking a bus into the chapel, hitting her on at the front, maybe. I think all of her husbands are peeing and they all get a bat. It's Poirot style.

That famous one, won't say which one, where everyone gets a shot. That famous one won't say which one, where everyone gets a shot. So, leading up to the event, a few days before, a social card playing night was held, hosted by lawyer and ex-politician Mac McDonald. Ethel was dominating the games, winning hand after hand. Mac noticed that she was going to a handbag each round. What do you call it? It's not a round, is it? after hand. Mac noticed that she was going to her handbag each round. What do you call it? It's not a round, is it? Each hand. Yeah, each hand she was going into her handbag.

Each hand handbag. Makes sense. Makes sense. He couldn't be 100% sure, but he had a funny feeling she was cheating. In fact, he was quite sure she was cheating, but he thought to himself, why would a woman of her standing sink so low?

It didn't make any sense. Anyway, a few days later, it's time for the big day. Or as we already know, the big wedding day that wasn't. While Livesey and her bridesmaids were readying themselves for the event, there was a knock at the door. It was Mac McDonald and groomed to be Rex Beach. Mac McDonald. Mac McDonald. And Rex Beach. Mac McDonald. Mac McDonald. And Rex Beach.

It was like, has she made up the other people's names in her life as well? Ridiculous. Your name is now Rex Beach. Nice to meet you, Rex Beach. Mac was so sus on Ethel's card playing that he investigated her history. Rex, Mac and Ethel went into another room and Mac listed everything he found out. All the marriages, the bigamy, the outstanding fraud charges, all the inconsistencies between her stories and what he'd found out.

Jeez, what a journalist, what an investigator. Yeah, because he was a lawyer. He was in politics later, so he had connections, I guess. Database, just got on the World Wide Web. Yeah, and this is all within oh onto the internet movie database yeah just gave it a google and this is all within a few days

so he figured it out pretty quickly that's the kind of friend you need because that's gonna save Rex a lot of embarrassment yes and cash and cash Ethel pleaded with Rex to let her explain

but the wedding was off Max was like Max was, I'm telling you. Don't do it. Don't do this. We got to bail. Um, on the Monday morning, so he gave her a couple of days. Mac went to the police to let them know what he'd found out. Later that morning, two police officers arrived at Ethel's apartment, but they found only

her personal assistant, Joyce Dick, who had been working for Ethel since she moved to Sydney earlier that year. Joyce Dick. That's fake. Joystick. Joystick. Joystick. Joystick, yeah. The police asked Dick, the police asked Joyce Dick,

what she knew about Ethel, and Dick replied that she knew a lot less than she thought. All the control of my mouth then. She knew a lot less than she thought. What then? All the control of my mouth then. She knew a lot less than she thought. Everything she thought she knew was a lie. She'd been fooled as well. In the end, I guess she knew Dick. Ethel had vanished.

They discovered she'd been driven to a train station south of Sydney. She probably fucking married someone at the train station. Was she tied to the tracks? That would be alright. I'd be happy with that. Telling her driver that she was going to Melbourne, Sydney police continued to search for her. An arrest warrant arrived from South Australia

for Mrs. Florence Elizabeth Ethel Liversea, alias Gardner, alias Anderson, alias Stevens, alias Lockwood, alias Pamela Pilkington, alias Gloria Gray. Anderson. They went, that's Lockwood, alias Pamela Pilkington, alias Gloria Gray. And dissent. They went, that's so stupid, we'll leave it off. Leave that one off, that's embarrassing.

The warrant was for the 12-year-old charge of fraud. So one of the ones she bailed on at the court. Mr. Livesey back in England had also sent his attorney out to Australia to try and get his money back. Police followed up reports of sightings of Ethel in Tasmania, Melbourne, Sydney and Brisbane. There were many tip-offs. Some of them were pretty unlikely, like being seen walking down a busy Sydney street in broad daylight.

Apparently, because it was a big news in the papers as well, so like obviously she's not walking down main streets, but there was a better lead in Brisbane based on her buying a train ticket from Brisbane to North Queensland. But when the police arrived at the station, she wasn't on the train. It seems like she'd bought a ticket as a decoy. Oh, wow. Journalists in Australia and the UK were interviewing all sorts of related people as the story was blowing up. Someone from London's Daily Mail tracked down Ethel's dad on the Isle of Man,

explaining to him the story. Oh no! I feel so bad for him. Heartbroken with what he learnt, he replied before she left, she told me she was returning shortly. He then stared out the window and didn't comment further. Oh, dad! Heart is broken.

That is awful. What a sweet man. He was just like, oh, good. She's going to go get my grandchildren. I'll finally meet them. And now he's finding out, oh, she's been married a lot and we don't know anything about any children. She's never with any children. Oh, that's awful.

Two weeks after her disappearance, the police received an anonymous tip-off after appealing to the public via the press. The tip suggested that she was hiding out in a boarding house in Chester Hill, 15 miles west of Sydney. Having followed up many dead ends, the police were shocked to find Ethel at the boarding house. After taking some time to dress up, she went with the police without a fuss. According to Nichols, when the police officer was about to let her know

why she was being arrested, Ethel replied, I know, detective. It's been in all the papers. God, she sucks. Tell me something I don't know. I feel like she's going to get away with it. It turns out,

after she had the driver take her to the train station south of Sydney, telling him she was heading for Melbourne, she actually caught a train straight back to Sydney. And the sighting of her in downtown Sydney was a genuine sighting. She was in town sorting out some lawyers for an inevitable court case. As it turned out, it was Ethel who had anonymously rang the police with her location as nichols wrote sick of being on the run she wanted to clear the air tell her side of the

story get her life back her lawyers had assured her that if she faced up to the charges she'd more than likely get off the minor fraud charge and she was now ready that's a good twist yeah leading up to the trial ethel's lawyer organised her an interview with the Truth newspaper in which she said, the only person I've ever heard is myself. No. That is because, woman-like, I've been too trusting and generous. Oh my God. Whoa.

The only person I've heard is myself. My biggest crime is carrying two months. I love too much and too easily. Guilty as charged. I guess I just have bad taste in men. And my children are men and they're bad. And fuck you, Billy. Fuck you, Billy.

You dog, you started all this. I loved you, Billy. The trial was massive news. Crowds gathered outside every day and opinion was divided as to Ethel's innocence. It was in all the papers, but it was just like, it was, it was an, it was a, what do you, it's something like, it's a big, real big thing. Yeah. Oh yeah.

Couldn't have said it better myself. You know what I mean? No. It was... What do you call it when a news story goes real big? It's big. Yes. Thank you.

At the end of the trial, I'm starting... I got to this point and in the... Where in the book, there's still... Like I say, read the book. Because I'm only telling a sliver of it. I didn't... The second half... Which is crazy yeah yeah well because we're at nearly three hours anyway this is a sliver i'm uh i'm going through some parts briefly here um at the end of the trial the jury found ethel guilty on both counts of fraud And despite the judge not really being sure what to make of Ethel,

he ended up not giving her any jail time. Instead, just a 300-pound bond. It seems a lot of the rest of her life, Ethel spent in courtrooms. She sued multiple parties, including her lawyers and even her ex-fiancé, Rex Beach. Why? Because he... He's just another Billy.

I think it was because he didn't go through the wedding, maybe. And she was left with some of the costs. How her life ended seems to have been hit by a bus. No, sorry. No, I misread that. No, it's some sort of a mystery. Oh, choose your own death. Oh, yeah, that's true, actually.

Yeah, then we can choose. In the 1980s, her son, Frank, who didn't... Frank II. Frank II, who didn't really rate his mum. Basil was pretty open to her coming, but Frank never really forgave her for how he was treated. That's fair. But he was looking for his birth certificate and thought if he tracked down his mum, she might have it.

He's like, she'd be very old now, but if I find her, maybe she'll still have it. But according to Nichols, a death notice appeared in the South Australian Advertiser stating that Mrs. Florence Ethel Livesey had passed away in the small country town of Clare, South Australia in March 1953. So that was that. Ethel was gone at the age of 55. Or was she? After ordering the death certificate, it showed the death of an 87-year-old woman

who had died from gangrene in her left leg. Like, that doesn't seem right. Strangely enough, there were newspaper reports about a woman looking uncannily like her 18 months after she'd been released from Adelaide Jail. She was being sought for three counts of false pretenses in Western Australia. This large middle-aged woman had a nice little scheme happening

where she'd say she was going to buy a house, then get the keys from the owner or a state agent without even paying a deposit then show the house to young couples offering it at a greatly reduced price and would then pocket their cash deposits before disappearing could this have been ethel sounds like it's possible yeah but we'll probably never know for sure it's it's unknown that that death certificate did the age really didn't add up at all unless she changed it from minus nine to plus 30. Of all the victims she left in her wake,

some recovered better than others and some have their fates unknown. There was a bunch of her ex-husbands and stuff where Nichols wasn't quite able to track down. Some of the ones she did track down, Thomas Liversy bought back his two properties from Ethel's bankrupt estate for £150 and probably disappeared off the radar, a darn sight poorer than when he first met the charming Mrs. Ethel Corradine. So he luckily got a couple of his properties back, which means he was probably doing all

right. She was bankrupt. So there was another big court case and she owed a lot of people money, but was bankrupt, which was very embarrassing. Oh, it is embarrassing. You can't travel first class and you're bankrupt. That's right. Ethel's son, Basil, continued to run his news agency until he retired.

That's the coolest thing in the until he retired that's the coolest thing in the whole story yeah it's the only thing she bought that actually lasted yeah yeah great

the only thing she did for anybody else and his brother Frank George Anderson was married with five children get this all named Frank

married with five children when he met the love of his life June Bolin. She was a widow with four small children of her own. They raised the nine children together, determined not to let their combined brood be torn asunder, and together had another five children.

No. I don't know if there's any questions that come off the back of that. 14-child family or... I guess my only question is, do they know what's causing them? Yeah, fantastic question. But he was already married and then met someone else. Yeah, it was like the apple doesn't fall far from the tree sort of stuff there. 14 children.

And is one of them the grandchild of the book? Yeah, I guess so. the grandchild of the book? Yeah, I guess so. Finally, like so, yeah, most of the ex-husbands were left way worse off, obviously. Many of them never recovered any of their money that she stole. But lastly, maybe most importantly for the dog lovers out there,

Tingling the dog led out his days in the care of May and Mac McDonald. Lived a happy life. That's good. Full life. God bless you, Tingling. Tingling. Did they rename the dog? Oh, surely.

Because they hated it. Like all those people, they really couldn't stand her after the... That's fair. Her bub. Yep. And that really hurt her. She's like, what are you dropping me just like that

yes and her downfall was cheating at the card game that's right which she'd learnt all those years earlier yeah when she was working

in the pleasure casino or whatever it was called the secret casino um to finish up here's a little summary written by Nichols at the heart of her career

if you could call it that Mrs. Liveriversy was a household name. She had over 40 aliases, eight official marriages, five divorces, four children to different men, and had traveled throughout the continent to America, Asia, and the Pacific in the best style possible. Had numerous arrests and court appearances and was imprisoned several times. Florence Elizabeth Ethel Swindles was an actress, an artist, a stowaway, a spy, a gambler, an air raid warden, a nurse, an heiress, and above all,

a notorious con woman. She could never stay still. She loved a good story. She sought fame and fortune, flaunted the law, deceived and had little regard for others, was impulsive and never seemed to plan ahead. Ethel was one amazing woman the end

i don't know i really like nichols i like her writing um but i don't know if she knows the what the word amazing means i mean she does amaze yes yeah just maybe just not in a positive sense yeah that's right yeah i think it was all maybe there's part of it is she's writing basically writing the biography of her friend's grandmother yeah so there's like she's looking for a little positive spin but it feels hard to find her and in summary your grandmother was a piece of shit real piece of shit and i'm disappointed i couldn't find information about her death because i was hoping it had been violent um an incredible story i'm not rooting for her at all but what a wild story that was fun that was a fun story that was a great story matt well i um i appreciate i'm just the vessel yeah it's just a messenger here of

course they say don't shoot the messenger but we can thank the messenger don't shiv the messenger i wasn't i was nervous early on i'm like because i i read me once shame on you i skimmed the story and i'm like i can't god there's no i didn't feel like there was anything big but it was just the the sheer amount of things and her just repeating the same yeah it's just it was a wild story yeah yeah and it's a it's one of those australian stories like i mean australian slash english story that for some reason i'd never heard anything and it sounds like like it was lost to history a bit yeah that's right until nichols wrote the book but that also at the time she's on the front page of all those newspapers. That's right.

So she's been able to go back through these interviews and other historical documents. But it's so amazing that a story can be so big. And at the time, people were probably like, this is the wedding of the year. Yeah. The fraud of the year. And then, you know, 50 years later, everyone's like, who? Yeah. What?

I know. Well, that brings us to everyone's favourite section of the show where Jess has left the building. Everyone was counting down to her exit. We have lost Jess. We're recording this a few days later. Because it was what, 1am or 1.30 when we stopped recording? Pretty late.

I knew I had work in the morning. I was very productive that next day. I bet you were. Yeah. So, yeah, we're doing this without Bop. So, you're going to have to fill some of her roles today. Yeah, fuck you. But also, I'm sweet.

That's pretty good. Thanks. So, this section of the show goes for about 30 to 40 minutes every week. I thought it was 20 to 30. You're blowing out there. No, no. It's always been 30 to 40. Are you sure?

Yeah, I reckon. Okay. All right. It's normally around 30, but sometimes it nudges up to 40. Well, someone will get the graph going and we'll get an average. Yeah. Get a mean, get a median. There's a few people who get hurt by the length of it sometimes, but, you know, this isn't for them,

even though it kind of is because some of them are Patreon supporters. But this is the section where we thank our great supporters who support us at patreon.com slash dogoandpod or dogoandpod.com. And once you're on there, Dave, all sorts of rewards you can get. That's right. We're putting out three bonus episodes a month. At the moment, you also get access to the back catalogue, which includes heaps of mini reports on some pretty wild topics,

as well as we put out our Brendan Fraser-themed podcast, Phrasing the Bar. Our Dungeons and Dragons, Do Go D&D, get the whole campaign there. Lots of stuff to listen to, as well as access to the Facebook group, which is very, very nice uh pre-sale tickets you get to vote for topics and just uh feel good about supporting the show you get to feel good hey hey what what more reward exactly and the first of the rewards that we get into is the fat quote or question section which I think has a jingle that goes something like this. Fact quote or question. Ding.

He always remembers the ding. And in this one, the people on the Sidney Scheinberg level or above get to give us a fact, a quote, or a question, or a fact, or a suggestion. I said fact twice then. Yeah, we love facts. You can be whatever you like, really.

And you also get to give yourself a title. And we read four out each week. I don't read them until I read them. And this week, the first one comes from Pete Holburton. Dave, who I believe you bumped into. Am I remembering that right? Yes, Pete. How are you?

On the streets of South Yarra, I bumped into Pete whilst he was headphones in. And he goes, I'm listening to you right now. I'm listening to an episode. So that was quite amazing. And Pete's title is NASA fan boy in charge of deliberately misunderstanding the requirements. Am I saying that right? NASA or is it Nasa?

I think we enjoy saying Nasa. So Pete has given us a fact writing, Hi, Matt, Jess and Dave here's my fact quote question brag and suggestion holy moly okay that's the requirements that he's missed out on yeah that's right fact Buzz Aldrin's mother's maiden name was Moon quote the third man on the moon Pete Conrad

was only five foot six 168 centimeters tall referencing neil armstrong's that's one small step his first words on the moon were whoopee man that may have been a small step for neil but that's a long one for me that's very funny if true uh he chose the words to win a bet but the loser of the bet never paid up. Wow. Have you heard of that before? I've never heard that. That feels like something that we should know.

I guess now we do. Amazing thing. Because you'd be going through your mind, what are you going to say? What are you going to say? You all said these iconic words a year or two earlier and you're like, all right, I've got to match up to that. Oh, whoopee.

That's great. Brag. I've met 12 of the to that. Oh, whoopee. That's great. Brag. I've met 12 of the 24 astronauts who have flown to the moon, including six of the 12 who landed. Wow. How? How, Pete?

Tell us. How? Are you going around to their houses? What's going on? Are you stalking these people, Pete? 12 of the 24 that have been there and six of the 12 that have landed. Wow. Or stood. Maybe it goes to a lot of those uh space con events nice do they have them like the comic book ones yes

you know space con all the famous people are there yeah signing signing your uh collector cards signing your piece of the moon moon rock uh suggestion Apollo 13 would be an excellent report topic because we've done Apollo

sorry Apollo 13 would be an excellent report topic we did Apollo 11 that's right I've actually put it up for the vote before I've seen the movie

really Tom Hanks was involved yeah I remember I remember seeing it on the movie on the television in the 90s I went to the

I saw that for my, it was my birthday. Whatever year that was. For 117th birthday or something. What a celebration. Did you go like with friends or something? Yeah, I remember I went with a couple of friends. Is there a scene where they're pissing out into space? That's maybe the only thing I can remember from the movie.

I don't recall that. Yeah, I don't remember much about it. I wonder what year it came out. I don't know. What do we call it? Apollo 13. It's a Ron Howard movie, right? 1995.

Wow. Yes. Good cast. So I was repeating primary school for the 15th, 16th time. Good cast. So, I was repeating primary school for the 15th, 16th time. And question, is this taking the piss? I'll answer my own question.

Yes, yes, it is. I promise I won't do it again. Love the pod. Thanks for all the laughs. I think it's totally fine to have a fat quota question and question if it's on the same topic. On the same topic and they're all brief. And they're all good. Yeah, that's true. I must say, Pete, they're all impressive ones but um you're right don't don't do that again the problem is he starts a precedent and then all of a sudden this thing blows out

beyond the the 40 minute oh my god and people are suddenly being like uh actually screenshotting time codes and sending them to you that's right um thank you pete loved it uh next one comes from shannon burns uh who's the official provider of passive aggressive customer service uh and they're asking a question which is what is the weirdest coincidence that happened to you they've answered the question thank goodness because it's the kind of one that you need a bit of notice on and i should i feel like i should check the questions first and give them to you and jess ahead of time yeah because i don't like disappointing people but the biggest coincidence yeah some some of them you just

have an answer come straight to mind sometimes like this is specific i'll i'll read out shannon's okay and then um then see if that jogs your memory at all. Maybe it involves me and that could also be mine. That's true. Shannon writes, I was listening to your Super Bowl episode. Well, you just talked about a great coincidence with Pete. That's right. I'm listening to you right now.

And that's the second time that that's happened on that street in South Yarra. Wow. Same place. That's a wild coincidence. It was with the Coca-Cola episode last time. I remember someone said, I'm listening to you. While drinking a Coca-Cola?

Yeah. I was drinking a Pepsi and it was... Was that irony? I don't know. I was drinking New Coke. I was listening to your Super Bowl episode while walking and playing Pokemon Go.

You mentioned that during one halftime show the acts included a frisbee catching dog named ashley whippet i was walking past the pokemon go gym at that moment and decided to check which players had pokemon does that make sense to you that's the end of it oh okay i thought there was going to be something else. So... Yeah, it feels like it's missing a part of it. I don't know if that got cut off or something, or am I just not understanding this? Because there's no full stop at the end.

From the top, from the top. What were they doing with the Frisbee? They're listening to the episode. So, listening to the Super Bowl episode while walking and playing Pokemon Go. The weirdest thing in this is that there's a Pokemon Go gym. Yeah, I think there must be designated zones or something. Oh, okay. I thought it was like a gym where Pokemon people,

like, you know, like the barbells had Pikachu drawn on them and stuff. No, because in the game and the TV show, the whole thing, there's these different gyms that you go into and to get a badge, which to become a Pokemon master, you need all the badges. You have to challenge the leader of that gym. Oh, right. So it's like scouts. Yeah.

Dib, dib, dob. Yeah, I'm just going to say yes. I haven't deja vu about that. Did we talk about that recently and none of us, there were no scouts in the area to confirm or deny that dib-dib-dob is a thing. In the area? What do you mean? In the vicinity that we could ask.

That wasn't you? No worries. Different podcast probably. I only talk to people on podcasts. Do you do podcasts in areas surrounded by people often or was it a live show you think? Maybe. I thought it was a live show. Right.

areas surrounded by people often or was it a live show you think maybe i thought it was a live show right anyway um so shannon writes you mentioned that during one halftime show the acts included a frisbee catching dog named named ashley whippet i was walking past the pokemon go gym at that moment decided to check which players had pokemon yeah that's that's got to be cut off. I'm imagining someone in the Pokemon gym had a character called Ashley Whippet. Yes. Or they were flipping around a Frisbee in the gym or something. Yeah. But maybe you could come back to us with that.

That's part one. If you get back to us before I record the next one, I will come back with the stunning conclusion. Yeah, that's right. To be continued. Next one comes from Susie Costa from Sacramento in California. People don't normally do that, but you can put next to your name where you're from if you want.

I like that. I like that too. I can really now I can picture Susie Costa. Yeah. Sacramento, the capital city of California. Sacramento Kings. Is that a something?

That's a team in maybe maybe ice hockey? Yeah. Or an old basketball team? Anyway, Susie is the senior analyst of Nibbler

and Cannoli. They're still playing the NBA. There you go. They're two rescue dogs. Still playing the NBA. Oh man, that's going to be brutal if anyone's a Kings fan. I'll playing the NBA There you go They're two rescue dogs Still playing the NBA Oh man That's going to be brutal If anyone's a Kings fan

I'll watch the NBA And I don't even You don't even know They're so irrelevant at the moment That I didn't even realise They were still a team I think they must be the Fourth

One in California right Yeah Four of four? Is there four? Fuck. You got the Lakers. You got Clippers. Clippers. Golden State.

The Warriors. And they're all pretty good. Yeah. Or, you know, have been in recent times. And then the Kings. The Kings, though, they have won a championship in 1951. Yeah, right. There you go.

Anyway, Susie, sorry about dissing your team. But Susie's got a fact. Writing, I have a brag and a fact. A bragt. This is my first time writing in as an upgraded Patreon member. I think of it as upgraded. The Sidney Sheinberg upgraded Patreon level. Uh-oh.

Susie writes, Matt Stewart, prepare for a compliment ride. First, the fact. Matt Stewart's laugh is the same as my late fiance's, also named Matt. He passed away five years ago from brain cancer at the age of 28. Oh, that's so sad. That sucks. I'm sorry, Susie suzy yeah sorry to hear that for a few years i couldn't remember what my my matt's laugh sounded like and it broke my heart

the moment i realized that the similarity was incredible and made me cry in those fun and rare moments where mr matt stewart gets a good laugh It brings me back to the good days with my Matt. He always managed to laugh even when facing such an awful cancer and he enjoyed pods too. I didn't discover your pod until after he passed but I'm sure he would have loved all the sports episodes since he was the biggest sports nerd ever.

Matty Stewart's laugh and regret face bring me so much joy and so does the show. Thank you for allowing me to remember my Matt during the show. Also, pretty wild that a Matt from Australia and a Matt from California have the same laughs. Yeah, wow. Now my brag, after losing my Matt,

I met a wonderful man named Morgan who accepted me as I am grief and all he and our aforementioned pups have allowed me to experience joy again and we're getting married congratulations oh congratulations our dogs will be there too it's going to be a fabulous time I'm also going to walk down the aisle too I believe in a thing called love uh you. I did that for Jess because it's a great darkness song, of course. But Susie, Dave and I are also darkness fans. Yes, and we also believe in a thing called love. We believe in a little thing called love.

That's right. Just as a little bit more. I would not be opposed to you hijacking my reception for a live podcast with a bunch of annoyed old people who don't know what podcasts are if you're interested let me know congrats on your wedding too dave oh thank you i honestly we chose to get married at a private residence just so we could have our dog humphrey there so i

totally get why you would want your pups there uh and you might have heard uh humphrey bark in the background this is the post he just arrived. Keep up the great work. You three make Tuesdays my favorite day of the week. I hope to travel to Melbourne to see you live someday. Long live Jeff the Talking Mongoose. Lots of love and sugar bowls, Susie. That's a very lovely message.

Yeah, congratulations. And we're going to have to get you laughing more matt for suzy yeah it's it's i don't know i don't think i like the idea that i'm i don't laugh that much i feel like i laugh a bit silently it's just rare that i laugh audibly i don't feel like you're not a generous not an ungenerous uh podcast laugher to pod with. But Jess and I do talk about how sometimes if we get you on a roll, it's both one of the most hilarious and joyous things you can say, but also it feels very satisfying.

See, there you go. You do lots of little chuckles, but when you do the big one, that is... It's rare but worth the wait. That's great. I love the reference to jeff the talking mongoose i think i saw the movies getting made about it yes and i had someone famous in it i think um but yeah that was wow what a what a what a what a message to receive suzy um

really glad you're listening and so uh so stoked that you found mor Morgan and you're getting married with the dogs and everything's... Yeah. I mean, I'd totally be up for heading over to Sacramento to gate crash a wedding, but... Hell yeah. Check out a Kings game over there. Yeah, yeah. Our fourth favorite Californian team. I feel bad.

I knew that. I'm sure I knew that. I'm coming off a sickness, all right, everybody? You said it because you know so much more about NBA than me, I was thinking, oh, I thought they were a basketball team. Obviously, Matt would know. Oh, brutal. And the Jeff the Talking Mongoose, it's going to star Simon Pegg.

Oh, wow. As Jeff. Honestly, maybe. And the final one this week comes from Julian Wren, aka the patron formerly known as Julian Barnes. Ah, Barnsey, now Rennie. Love it. So, what's the new name?

Julian Wren. Julian Wren. Like the bird. Love a Wren. Beautiful. That's a great name. I mean, Julian Barnes, also a good name, but Julian Wren. Yeah, I think Friend is a big fan of blue fairy wrens

and they're just freaking beautiful little birds. I mean, they're no Irish magpie, but... I mean, but what is? Yeah, they're up there. But what is? Anyway, Julian has a brag, which is, hey guys, my brag today is that I'm sitting in the hotel suite right before my wedding. Is that why the change of name?

Me and my future husband are chilling out, calming the nerves by listening to some choice moments from old Dugon episodes. Oh my God. Dave as Jeff the talking mongoose from the fifth dimension. Talk about coincidences. There it is. Isn't that weird? That is amazing. That episode is years old.

That's right. So, it's a bonus Patreon episode for anyone who wants to hear it. Yeah, it's got to be like four years old or something. I reckon, yeah. That's a wild coincidence that two people mentioned it back. I hadn't thought about that much in a long time. And both wedding related as well. Yeah.

The coincidences don't stop. Don't tell me Julian's from Sacramento. No. Julian is a king. I love that Julian's writing this message from backstage at the wedding, basically. Yeah. Backstage at a wedding. That's great.

So, at the time, chilling out, listening to moments from Do Go On episodes, including Jeff the Talking Mongoose from The Fifth Dimensions and cries of Release the Slugs are a very calming presence on this very busy day. Obviously, marrying the man I love is very exciting, but what's equally exciting is I get to take his last name, which is a huge upgrade from my boring old one. Julian Wren is absolutely a name I feel would be admired by the podcast. Big, big fan.

It sounds like an actor's name, don't you think? Starring Julian Wren. Yes. Or even a director, directed by Julian Wren. And if I'm being honest, Julian Barnes is already pretty good. That is a good name. Yeah. You started from a solid ground level.

You were a Barnsey. And you've shot into the stars. You're a Stratosphere. You're a Wrensy. The Wrenosphere. It's a Renaissance. I should probably wrap this up and go get married as always thanks for all the laughs that we got to share as a couple including a couple of dates at live shows and we look forward

to listening to more as husband and husband oh congratulations julian congratulations that's so freaking cool i love that's wild to me that you're thinking of us on your wedding day like that. Yeah, that's right. That's fair. Like, that's just, I mean, same as Susie's message just sort of,

yeah, blows me away those kind of messages that we're part of people's lives like that. Sorry to get sincere. Yeah. Straight away. No,

I totally agree with you but it's beautiful and, you know, we believe in a thing called love here to go on. So, I wonder where Julian's from. Been to a few live shows. So, possibly a local.

Yeah. Well, I mean, there's multiple cities we've done multiple shows, I guess. Yeah. Could be from London. Could be from Leeds, Leeds, Leeds, Leeds, Leeds. But thanks so much to Julian, Susie, Shannon and Pete. Loved all those messages really sorry Shannon

that yours cut off especially if that was my fault and I've somehow deleted half of it at some point but please get back to us with the rest of that coincidence and yeah the next thing we like to do

is play a little game isn't that right Dave Jess normally comes up with it maybe you can do it today she's very good at coming up with it. So, and we usually base it on the episode. This is a few days since we've recorded it now. It is, of course, about our imposter.

Yeah, all those fake names. Yeah. Ann Disson. So, maybe we can give everyone an imposter name. Yep, great one. I think that's... Especially when we're missing our most creative brain in the room i think it's good to keep it simple we don't want to go too outside of the box yeah that's right

but i think this could be this could be fun so what we're going to do is take their name and give them another name yes so and what ethel often did was use her real first name and just change the surname so you know we could do anything here. Wow. All right. So, maybe I'll kick it off. We do nine each week. That doesn't split well two ways.

Maybe I'll do the first five. Okay. All right. First up from Walton on Thames in Great Britain or Thames, I should say. Walton on Thames in Great Britain. It's Kate Robson. Kate Robson Kate Robson What about

Kate's changed their name to Crate Mick Hobson Oh yeah that's good So it's So close So if Kate accidentally said the wrong name They'd be like

So did you say Kate or Crate Oh yeah yeah I'm Crate Sorry I'm Crate And Kate's the nickname Yeah people call me Kate Because obviously Crate's not really a name So My parents were My parents were name. My parents were.

My parents were high. Yeah. My parents were off their fucking chops. Crate, Mick Hobson. That's great. That's great, Kate. Crate. Next up, I'd love to thank from Riga.

Riga? It's Riga. That's the capital of Latvia. In Latvia Alice Goldmane Oh fantastic name Right off the bat Oh my god That's hard to change that

To be any better Yeah it won't be better Alice or Elise Goldmane The other thing that Ethel would do Would be Using famous actors names Oh okay Yes yes yes

People she really admired So maybe Elise Goldmane could be Rebel Wilson. Like the actor. No. No, I don't. Or they pretend. I've never come across them.

I thought Rebel was Australian. No, Latvian. Latvian, yeah. People make that mistake all the time. Yeah, yeah. You know, couldn't probably point out Latvia on a map or Australia, I guess. Good luck. It's funny that my first instinct was Julia Roberts.

I'm like, it's got to be a funnier name than that. And then my brain accessed Rebel Wilson. Thank you so much, Alice Goldman, aka Rebel Wilson. And I'd also love to thank from Somerville in, I reckon, Massachusetts. Wow. In the United States. MA or is it Maine? I mean, you've said it wrong, obviously.

How do you say Massachusetts? Massachusetts. Thank you. I'd love to thank Adele Nietzsche. Adele Nietzsche. What about, was it Adele Nazzsche Adele Nietzsche what about was it Adele Nazeem

that's the way that John Travolta mispronounced the frozen yeah yeah Adele Nazeem great Adele Nazeem

perfect Adele I'm Adele oh man it must be so fun to have the name Adele that's great I'm Adele. Oh, man. It must be so fun to have the name Adele. That's great. I'm Adele.

Beautiful name, though. Imagine the first, what, part of your life, there weren't that many famous Adeles. Yeah. So, yeah, do you think maybe it would have felt like someone was muscling in on your territory? Yeah. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

I always thought that I'd be famous and that I'd be the Adele. I'm the famous Adele. Like, I'm the Dave. Yeah. Just saying. Hmm. I guess you could shorten Yeah. Just saying. Hmm. I guess you can shorten it to make it your own or change it to the Dell. Yeah, she's Adele, but I'm the Dell.

The Dell. I'm just looking up Somerville, Massachusetts. You're absolutely right. Home to Tufts University. Oh, Tufts. Just enjoy that. I'd also love to thank from Toronto in Ontario, Canada, Hayley Davison. Hayley Davison.

Hayley Davison went around in some... When passing through Goulburn. Oh, yeah. Got done for taxi evasion under the name Enrique Inglasius. It's one of the great names. Enrique Inglasius. Yeah, Enrique Inglasius. It's now Enrique In Handcuffs.

Wow. Enrique. Man, I love that name, Enrique Iglesias. I'm sure I've talked about this before. Maybe I've just done it. I've tweeted it out. There was one time in year seven, I cannot explain my actions.

Why, you know, the window bit of a wallet. I had like a Velcro wallet. You open up the window bit where, you know, people would put a picture of their family or a doc or something. I had a picture that I'd cut out of a newspaper of Enrique Iglesias and Anna Kournikova. I think you have told us about it. It's very funny.

I just can't explain myself. Why did I do that? Well, they were the it couple. They were a hot couple. And people, is that your mum and dad? Yes. Yes, it is. That's my mum and dad.

My granddad is Julio. Julio Iglesias. Another great name. Frickin' hell. Thatdad is Julio. Julio Iglesias. Another great name. Frickin' hell. That family's overflowing. Oh my goodness. Anna Kournikova is the boring name of that family. Come on.

They still together? I believe so. Anna and Enrique. Beautiful. You never hear about the success stories. No, that's right. They'd only ever make the news again if they broke up. The final one from me from Lenexa in Kansas in the United States, Mandy Richter.

I mean, how freaking great have all these names been? Oh my God. Mandy Richter is very close to Andy Richter. It is very close to Andy Richter. Okay. Is that Conan's sidekick? Yeah. Okay.

Do you think it could be Andy Richter? What about Mandy Richter to go under the... So close. What about Monan O'Brien? Oh, yeah. Moaning O'Brien. Yeah, I think that makes a lot of sense. Monan O'Brien.

Sorry, Conan. No, no, no. Monan. Monan O'Brien. If it had a Monan Myrtle. That feels like it could be like a jazz musician or something, no, no. Monan. Monan. Monan O'Brien. Have you heard of Monan Myrtle? That feels like it could be like a jazz musician or something, don't you think? Yeah. Old Monan O'Brien.

What was the Bleeding Gums Murphy? Yeah. Yeah. Monan O'Brien. Fantastic work. Thanks, Mandy Richter. Would you like to thank a few of our great supporters? Hey, I'd love to give a shout out and thank you to,

from Decatur, Indianapolis. Holy shit, remember Decatur from anything? I think we said it wrong and we're probably saying it wrong there because I got a lot of corrections on it. I'm like, I'm never going to need to know these corrections. When am I going to say this place ever again? Do you remember what I mentioned? In the Super Bowl episode, the Decatur Stalys was...

Maybe they won the first ever... What became the NFL championship? Looks like it could be... Here we go. I'm listening to it. Decatur. Decatur. Decatur.

Decatur. Decatur. Yeah, I remember getting a few messages of people like, it's actually pronounced. And I'm like, I was, you know, I want getting a few messages of people like, oh, it's actually pronounced. And I'm like, oh, I was, you know, I want to pronounce things right, but usually I'll pay more attention if I'm like, oh, that's a common thing that'll come up again.

Like I eventually figured out how to say, I think, or Akron. Akran. Akran. No. Yeah, like Ren. And that's how, there was the bird. Someone sent a picture showing it's pronounced like the bird Ren.

So, from Decatur, it's Kat Rogers. Kat Rogers from Decatur. Well, seeing as I believe their famous name was the Staley's, maybe, what about Staley Knife? Staley Knife. I love it. Which is, yeah. I don't know.

Yeah, Staley. I can't remember why they were named Staley. It doesn't really matter. But when I think of Staley, I think of Stanley. And when I think of Stanley, I think of Staley. It doesn't really matter. But when I think of Staley, I think of Stanley. And when I think of Stanley, I think of knives. Looks like they start, it's now the Chicago Bears. Oh, right. I would have explained all this on the episode.

Yeah, I know, but you just can't remember. I retain 5%. 5%, and you named every team, so every original team. Thank you so much to Staley Knife, a.k.a. Cat Rogers. I would like to thank now from unknown location can only assume this week this person is deep within the fortress of the mole listen to this episode right now it is kathy hein kathy hein kathy hein hein why don't when i think hein i think heinz and when you think heinz what do you think? Beans. Yeah. Beans means Heinz. As the famous ad says.

A good name would be Beans Means. Beans Means. Yes. So, what's your name? Beans Means. Beans Means. Any questions? Challenging that?

Is that your first and last name? First name. First and last. First Beans. Beans. Yeah. Surname? Beans.

Yeah. With a Z. Yeah. Like Heinz. Like Heinz. My parents are big Beans fans Yeah they love Beans Go Beans

Thank you Cathy Hein Okay Beans means I'd like to thank now From Perth In Western Australia It's Jordan Quinn

Jordan Quinn What was that That old song The Something Quinn It's like the Magnificent Quinn Or something Oh

Like very old Like 60s Okay Because that sounds like You know like Like maybe a Bob Dylan Song that was covered Something Quinn. It's like the Magnificent Quinn or something. Oh, like very old? Like 60s. Okay, because that sounds like, you know, like... Like maybe a Bob Dylan song that was covered by a band who made it more famous. Because that to me sounds like... The Mighty Quinn. When the saints go marching in. Right.

That's what I thought you meant, like something that old. The Mighty Quinn. Mighty's a good name. Good first name. By Manfred Mann made it a hit. Manfred Mann's not a bad... Not a bad... What about first name Mann, middle name Fred, surname Mann?

Oh, yeah. So if you know them quite well, it's Mann Mann. It is. It was a song written by Bob Dylan in 67. And then Manfred Mann made a hit. Man, Fred, Mann. Man, Fred, Mann. Jordan Quinn, okay, Man, Fred, Mann.

Thanks so much. And finally, I'd like to thank from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Go Penguins. Go Penguins. Is that right? We're allowed to say that one? Yeah, Pittsburgh's the Penguins. Thank you to Jake Collega.

Jake Collega. That's a name you can set your watch to. Detective Jake Collega. This might be one of the greatest batches of names I've ever had. I think every week somehow you guys manage to top it. Jake Collega. Okay. Something to do with penguins.

Penn's a good name. Penn? Penn. Penn. Yeah, Penn. And Collega's a bit name. Pan? Penn. Penn. Yeah, Penn. And Caliga's a bit like college, like a university. What do you think of? What would you call a penguin who went to university?

What would you reckon their name would be? Picture a little penguin with its backpack on, maybe a letterman jacket. And, you know, he's going to a kegger party. Oh, yeah. But he's also, like, getting really good grades. His CPR or whatever they say, SATs are high. SATs, STDs, he's got them all.

What about, I'm thinking Jason the Penguin. Jason the Penguin. Jason. Is Jake Ligger's fake name, surname, the Penguin? Jason the Penguin. I'm incognito. Oh, yeah? What's your name?

Jason The Penguin. And Jake never takes his sunglasses off. Yeah. Even at night and inside. Jason Penguin. Jason The Penguin. There's the middle name. So, normally it just goes around as Jason the Penguin

but if you're if you're being you know on his SAT report card it says Jason the Penguin so thank you very much to Jake, Jordan,

Kathy, Kat, Mandy, Hayley, Adele, Elise and Kate the last thing we'd like to do is welcome a few members in to the Triptych Club

just two inductees this week so the way this works is if you're on the shout out level or above for three straight years you're welcomed in to the trip ditch club uh it's a bit of theater of the mind there's a big room there's a stage dave standing on the stage he's your hype man uh the crowd everyone who's been welcomed in before is going to be in there clapping along cheering your name and. And Dave's going to welcome you in with a little pun work on your name or something like that.

I'll be at the door. I'll be reading out your name as you enter. Dave's also booked a band normally for the after party. Yeah, absolutely. This week, you're never going to believe it. We've actually got Bob Dylan. Holy shit. Performing from 1967, his hit song, later covered by manfred man the mighty quinn the mighty

quinn wow but he's doing like the 30 minute like bob dylan yeah he's doing all his song he's playing all his songs were made famous by other people all along the watchtower and other yeah there's quite a few he'd probably be able to pad out a whole set with songs that are probably more famous by other people that he wrote. And, yeah, so there's just two inductees. Jesselman comes up with a cocktail, the Ethyl. So, I'd say it's probably, it's going to be. Ethyl. The Ethyl. I'd say it's probably, it's going to be the ethyl. Would it just be like straight meth?

Meth, methylated spirits. Methylated spirits, yeah. Just homemade vodka. But sold to you as if it's a very high quality, high price. Yes, that's right. It'll be in a martini glass. Yeah, ooh. You sip and you go, ooh, that's strong.

And you go, yeah, yeah, you get used to it. Just keep drinking and also give me some money. Yeah, that one was $100 for the drink and a meet and greet. Can you imagine Ethel just sitting at a desk and people lining up to meet her? Back then, that's what they did. They were lining up like, we don't even know who it is, but look at this queue. It must be something important. It must be good.

All right, so just two names this week. You is, but look at this queue. It must be something important. It must be good. All right. So just two names this week. You ready, Dave? I am ready. So usually Jess hypes me up. Did you say you're going to hype me? I'll hype you up. Please.

Okay. I need you. Okay. Because obviously a hype man needs another hype up. I'm feeling good. Sometimes I'm a bit negative because often you do a really bad job. But today I want to put that to one side. That's why I'm going to put the history of your past performances to one side.

I want to believe in you. I'm going to try and look at it half glass full. Oh, God. Glass half full. Half glass full. That's a good name. If we need to give anyone else a name, half glass full is a glass. No, it is half glass.

Anyway. So, first up from Corvallis in Oregon, I reckon, in the United States, Jason Gears. Oh, put this night into first gear. Yes, Dave, you've done it. And from Severance in Colorado, the United States, it's Ethan Gilbert. We will never have to sever this relationship. No severance pay because you're in for life, Ethan. Dave's in hot form tonight.

Thank you so much and welcome Ethan Gilbert and Jason Gears. Grab a methyl ethyl. And make yourself at home. Methyl ethyl's a band. Yeah, isn't it? They're not playing. But anyway. We got Bob Dylan.

Is anyone complaining about getting fucking Bob Dylan there'd always be someone complaining I just don't get his voice man so that brings the end of the episode

anything else we need to tell people Dave we've got new merchandise available you can go to our website do go on pod.com and click through to our new

merch store we will ship it anywhere in the world and you can get t-shirts sweatshirts sweat, sweat jumpers, hoodies. It's all sweat. It's all sweaty. All with our real sweat on it. Yeah.

We've pre-sweat through them all. There's stickers and there's also stuff for Book Cheat and Primates, our other podcast. You can get mugs now. All sorts of stuff made to order and shipped to you. So, if any Americans listening love having that mugger Joe, we order and shipped to you. So, if any American's listening, love having that Mugger Joe. We got the mug for you. I love a Mugger Joe.

Love a Mugger Joe. I don't know what it is. It's a hot chocolate or is it a coffee? Who knows? But when you're sitting back in Decatur, having your Mugger Joe. I love just, there's nothing more relaxing than a morning cup of Joe. In a mug. In a mug. In a mug, yeah.

Cup of joe, mug of joe. No, it is cup of joe. It is cup of joe. Fucking hell. But we don't sell cups, we sell mugs. Yeah, that's right. So that's dogo1pod.com. Upgrade your cup of joe to a mug of joe. Also on our website, there's links to our Patreon where you want to support the show.

You can suggest a topic via the website and you can get in contact with us on our email dogo1pod.gmail.com or follow us on social media at dogo1pod. You know something I've recently discovered? We used to say to people,

hey, if you listen on Apple, you can give us a rating out of five, which is great. People still do that. Appreciate people doing that. Gets us up in the charts. You can also rate podcasts

on Spotify now, I've noticed. Oh, I didn't realize that. That's cool. A lot of people do listen to this show on spotify so i think it take you half a second you go on the app uh look up our show that's quick if you gave us five stars in half a second give yourself a pat on the back yeah have a mug of joe yeah have a mug of joe on us yeah anyway that'd be nice if you it probably affects where we go on the charts so dave please don't take me over the 40 minute mark here here. We've got to wrap this up. We'll be back next week with another episode.

But until then, I'll say thank you so much and goodbye. Laters. Bye. Bye. We can wait for clean water solutions. Or we can engineer access to clean water. We can acknowledge indigenous cultures. Or we can learn from indigenous voices.

We can demand more from the earth. Or we can demand more from ourselves. At York University, we work together to create positive change for a better tomorrow. Join us at yorku.ca slash write the future.