Do Go On - 346 - Ethel Livesey: Australia's Greatest Imposter

Episode Date: June 8, 2022

In Sydney 1945 Ethel Livesey was to marry Rex Beech. The press was dubbing it the society wedding of the year. But she wasn’t who she appeared to be. The truth was, she was Australia’s Greatest Imposter. This is the story of the Amazing Mrs Livesey!Read The Amazing Mrs Livesey by Freda Marnie Nicholls for the full storySupport the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: dogoonpod.com or patreon.com/DoGoOnPod Submit a topic idea directly to the hat: dogoonpod.com/suggest-a-topic/ Check out our new merch! : https://do-go-on-podcast.creator-spring.com/ Stream our 300th episode with extra quiz (and 16 other episodes with bonus content): https://sospresents.com/authors/dogoon Check out our AACTA nominated web series: http://bit.ly/DGOWebSeries​ Twitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: [e-mail] Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/ Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader Thomas REFERENCES AND FURTHER READING:The Amazing Mrs Livesey by Freda Marnie Nicholls - https://www.booktopia.com.au/the-amazing-mrs-livesey-freda-marnie-nicholls/book/9781760296193.htmlhttps://www.abc.net.au/radionational/programs/lifematters/mrs-ethel-livesey---australias-greatest-imposter/7315112https://www.britishpathe.com/video/ethel-livesey-tells-her-story Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Melbourne and Canada, we got exciting news for you. And we should also say this is 2026. Jess, what year is it? 2026. Thank God you're here. Right now, I'm in Melbourne doing my show with Serenji Amarna, 630 each night at the Cooper's Inn Hotel, having so much fun. We'd love to see you there.

Canada, we are visiting you in September this year. If you've somehow missed the news, we are heading up Vancouver, Calgary, Montreal, and Toronto for shows. That's going to be so much fun. Tickets for all this stuff, I believe, are online. And I'm here too. And welcome to another episode of Do Go One. My name is Devoniki.

And as always, I'm here with Jess Perkins and Matt Stewart. Hello. Hello. Hello. You said hello. You said hello. It sounded like how low. And it reminds me of this documentary I watched a while ago about Nevermind, Nirvana, Nevermind.

And there was this like music expert. And one of those talking, you know, they cut to talking heads and didn't really have anything to do with it. But there was this guy I went. And there's a lyric. where Kurt sings, hello, hello, hello, how low. And I just thought, that's genius. Whenever I read that song, I'm like, that's genius. Hello, hello, hello, how low.

How did he do it? Wow. That was, I once saw a band live and someone did that to me as we're watching the band. I saw the UK band Wild Beast and he says, I concur, I concur. And then the last one sounds like, I conquer. And he goes, and that one was a conquer. Do you get it? I'm like, you went to, did you go to gig with that old man musicologist?

I was like, I'm just trying to watch the gig. And obviously, it's during a live concert. He's yelling this into my year. I conquer, do you get it? Huh? That's so good. I love these guys. Is that a pun?

Fuck you. That is genius, though, I will say. That is genius. That was Matt with talking then. Yeah, but in both cases, that was me. I was on the documentary. I was watching. and I was yelling at Dave.

Anyway, Dave, how does the show that we're doing work? I forget. Well, what we do here is we take it in terms of a report on a topic often suggested to us by one of the listeners, sometimes voted for by our patron supporters. We go away, do a little bit of research, bring it back to the group in the form of a little report. And the other two don't know what it's going to be on.

And it's your turn, Matt, to report, yes? I put my head up because I had a question. Jess will, yes? I'll go to Jess first here. Have you ever referred to it as like a podcast report to other people and they've been very confused by it? I don't think so. I had it once where I was talking to another comedian who had just started her own podcast and I was like, I think this is at the old stupid old studios.

Like what are you up to today? And I was like, I'm just working on a podcast report. And she was like a podcast report. Like what is thinking there was some sort of reporting you had to do behind the scenes when you had a podcast? Yeah, exactly. I was like going throughout. our facts and our stats. And I was like,

oh no, no, it's just what we call it where I write the topic, I write the story for the show. Do you know how our pod works? Because I could explain that, but I won't do it well.

And it was just a bit of them. And now I think about it all the time when I say, I've got to go write a report. Yeah, I've got to go do my little homework assignment. Yeah, I've got to do my assignment.

That's exactly what it is. Their little homework assignments. Yeah. Let's start calling them that. Okay. Yeah, go on. Do your little homework assignment.

I've got homework to do. This week, it is Matt's turn to give us his homework, we'll grade him. We don't know what the topic is, and to get us on the topic, you always starts with a question, which again sounds like we're doing some sort of...

Yeah. Because I don't... I had never heard of this topic, and I'm assuming you both haven't, but maybe you have, but because of that... Never assume with me. I've asked a sort of a tangential...

Tangential question. Okay. Better than a tan rough question. Better than a tant trick question. Sexy. My question is, What is the sixth of the seven Catholic sacraments? Oh, oh, I could have a go at this.

Okay. Six of the seventh. What's the, yeah, I think they're sort of ordered. Well, yeah, but I just looked this up. Oh, is it last rites? Well, that's the, I think that's the seventh, yeah. Well, I thought, yeah. Oh, oh, second last rites.

What's before last rites? Because it's like, uh, baptism, uh, first communion. It might be one in between there. confirmation. Reconciliation. Oh, reconciliation. And then First Communion and then confirmation. So that's four. And then there's like,

uh, some sort of midlife crisis. Something about marriage. I've got this list here that doesn't feel right. Something about marriage is correct. Yes. Matrimony. That's what I think.

I don't know. I'm just looking at this list now and it's not even what I thought I'd copied down. So matrimony is number six. Whatever the website I just copied it off was baptism, confirmation, Eucharist, reconciliation, anointing of the sick matrimony. and holy orders.

Annoit of the sick, right? But I guess holy orders, is that like being a priest or a nun? I don't know. Oh, I guess so, yeah. This is very tangential. Well, I did all right. You did great.

Great work. I've done a few of them. The answer is matrimony or marriage because this topic is chocka block with the stuff. Okay. So, yeah, I figured you wouldn't know the name. What, will you? Does the name Ethel Liversy mean anything to you?

Yes. Fuck. Yes, she is. My aunt. No. She is me and I pull off my face mask. I'm going to go, I don't recognize Ethel, so this doesn't mean anything. No, so this is intriguing.

Well, it was suggested by Daniel Roberts from Wogga Wogga, who said, If you want another badass woman, you'll love it. Unbelievable story. We love a badass woman. Yeah, I'd find it interesting what he reads as a badass woman. Okay. But I'll be interesting to see if you agree with Daniel. By the end of the report, I want to see how much you agree with Daniel Roberts.

Okay. Is she a badass woman or is she just a bad woman? Oh. I mean, I don't know. I'm asking the question. I mean, yeah. That's a good question, man. It was also suggested by Bronn Liversy, who's from Goldburn, where Ethel Liversy spent some time in this story briefly, who wrote, despite having an unusual surname, we're not related.

Oh, that's just an absolute coincidence. That was exciting for me. moment. Yeah, I'm wondering if maybe she is related and she doesn't even know it. Wow. All right. So we're going back to Sydney, 1945. Ethel Liversy was to marry Rex Beach.

That's fake. Rex Beach. That's great. Rex Beach is the real name. The press was dubbing it, the Society Wedding of the Year. According to a book written by Nichols, I'm going to mention her in a second, but this is from her book. She wrote, the book's called The Amazing Mrs. Liversy.

And this is the, it's really the primary and only source for this story. Okay. Nichols wrote, outside the Australia Hotel, a crowd had gathered, hoping to catch a glimpse of the wealthy bride everyone was talking about. Hundreds lined Castleray Street from 7pm on that warm early summer evening. At 7.15pm, hotel staff rolled out the hotel's famous red carpet. And by 7.30pm... They were the first ones to do red carpet. I like her, yeah.

No, their one was in particular famous. That red carpet couldn't go out anywhere without being. Oh, God. Oh, that hassled. Just wants to go get a coffee, can't do it. That shade. People go, oh, my goodness. Yeah, it's got to wear a hat and glasses.

Is that the Australia Hotel Red Carpet? Oh, my goodness. By 730, the crowd had grown to enormous proportions. Watching guest after guests file passed in their finery. Ball gowns that hadn't seen the light of day since before the war. New gowns for those who could afford them, dinner suits and many returned servicemen in dress uniform.

The numbers waiting outside continued to swell as invitations were checked and guests were admitted. A daily mirror reporter would later write that many openly gasped at the splendor of the feast before them and the variety of expensive liquors on offer. God, see, there just aren't things now that would just take our breath away like that. We were talking about that. Who was there?

Hedy. Hedy Lamar. Hedy Lamar and how people were gasped when they saw her on screen. How attractive she was right. Yeah, yeah. Her beauty was like, they were awestruck. I kind of laughed at that, and then I saw a photo of her later, and I went, Yeah, you did. She was really hot.

Yeah. That's weird that I didn't think there were people that hot anymore. I've seen Brad pit my whole life. You gasped and then, like, instant stiffy. Yeah. And that, you know. I had a laptop on my lap, but it wasn't on my lap any longer. flew into the ceiling.

It's gone. It's in space now. You remember that sand? Boyoyoyoy on you. Yeah. It was very embarrassing. What about food? Can you imagine someone lifting up the closh and you're going,

I reckon for me it would have to be like a human or something. Okay. Oh God, it would be like a disgust sound? Like a head or something. Yeah. What about like a really, really pretty dessert? Like a very intricately made dessert. Okay.

And it's more of like a, I'm not shocked by. I don't know there's something edible under there, hopefully. What about an animal you previously thought was extinct? Right. Tasmanian tiger, roasted. That would make me gasp. We got to kill the last one.

Yeah, I was pretty upset. Again, we found it. And now we're going to eat it. No one has tasted this animal in over 100 years. Chefs carved and waiters fluttered around with drinks. The orchestra tuned there. instruments for the wedding march but at 4 at 8.45pm Mr. Baden Johnson, the banquet manager. It's a fantastic title.

Baden Johnson. Baden Johnson. Banquet manager. That's good. Sorry, the bank manager. No, no, no. The banquet manager. It's like a small bank. He. Johnson mounted the orchestra dais and addressed the guests saying, Ladies and gentlemen. Mumbo number five. Sorry. Sorry. I've been asked to announce that the hostess will not be able to be with us. He stopped as gasps from the guests turned in as speculative murmurings. I don't think people are gasping quite as much as we're being told. You don't understand.

1984, big year for gasping. Wow. A lot of smokers. Yeah. She would like you to carry on as if she were here. Enjoy yourselves, he said. Okay. And they did.

they went okay they partied on apparently it was unlimited French champagne and they just just avoided eye contact with the groom yeah he's just sitting in the corner

cheers to you buddy thanks so much you guys are paying for this I hear still pain you're still paying you're still paying cheers

no he wasn't there either that's right just before the big event it was called off liverzy had been unmasked as a fraud she wasn't who she appeared to be the truth was

she was Australia's greatest imposter. She had over 40 aliases, had already been married many times over, and there was a long list of outstanding fraud charges in her name. This is the story of the amazing Mrs. Liversey. Oh, so it seems like her fiancée Rex Beach really dodged a bullet there. Yeah, I think that's fair to say. Because, you know, he didn't marry her.

That's right. And as you're going to hear, many others did not dodge that bullet. Wow. A few years ago, this story was all but forgotten. That changed in 2013 when Liversie's granddaughter, Louisa Echinger, caught up with an old friend, author, Frida Nichols. Aichinger told Nichols she was struggling to piece together her grandmother's story, and before long, Nichols was obsessed with the story. And then a couple of years after that, a book titled The Amazing Mrs. Liversie was released.

That book has been my main source of information for this week's episode And if anyone's interested in learning more, it's a fun read I would recommend it I both downloaded the e-book and the audible book Oh good and just read along with the voice It was like when I was a kid again And they did have a little ring to turn the page I wish it did

That would be sick It's so good More things should do that I reckon newspapers That'd be nice Yeah So I know when I got to the end I just want to know when I turn the page When

I've been stuck at this page for years. All right, so here is the story of the amazing Mrs. Liversie. The woman now known as Mrs. Liversie was actually born Florence Elizabeth S. Florence Elizabeth Ethel Swindles in Manchester, England on the 24th of September 1897. Oh my God, this is nominative determinism. Isn't that like, that's got to be one of the biggest nominative determinisms we've ever had, right? Yeah.

And she's born in England. Yeah. Yeah, right. Manchester The Swindles were a well-off family Or Swindells maybe Okay yeah

That's how they'd say It's Swindell I have not been able to figure out What this show was I remember it from when I was a kid I reckon it was a cartoon And there was a guy It's Mezell

Yes What is that It's just because you say All the time is And I know that I also know it from Matt Only If you know

Matt explain the reference Because I'd love someone To write in So there's like I think it's a bad guy and he's sort of one of those hapless bad guys in a cartoon probably from the 90s and he he would um his sidekick maybe would always go right this way mr weasel and he'd always say it's weasel i'm so sorry i just gave you a moment of hope by saying you were like yes what is it like no man you just

say that a lot it's weasel and it's definitely not the tv show i am weasel oh that could be it The show is called It's Weezel. But he was a cool character. The sad one on that was I.R. Baboon. Oh, that rings a bell. Do you remember that? Yeah. That rings no bells.

Which means I'm not going to turn the page. The Swindells were a well-off family and held plenty of status and power in the town. With her father, Frank, having made his money in cotton, and Florence Elizabeth Ethel Swindells. I'm just going to call her Ethel from now on. Yeah. she lived a very comfortable childhood. But with a world war around the corner, things are about to get tougher.

According to Nichols, Ethel was three months short of 18 when she married Alexander Alec Carter against her father's wishes. She lied about her age at the registry office, left school and home and moved to the town of Eccles to the north of Manchester, where her new husband was working as a stationer with his father. The great war had started in August, the previous. year and Ethel later recalled big parties in the street and how the boys from the Manchester Grammar School talked of nothing else except fighting for King and Country with large numbers of boys and men signing up. They thought the war would last no more than a few months and they were keen to be a part of it. But after a few months the reality of war began filtering back, together with

the lists of dead and wounded. Alec didn't immediately enlist as he was classed unfit for active service when he applied to join up with his father at the beginning of the war. But by 1916, men were falling like flies and the war office began calling up those who had been rejected at the start. Actually, we've looked here. You know what? Asthma is not such a big deal, I reckon. If you maybe just take it kind of easy.

Yeah. Yeah, you can come and join. Bring spare fentanylin. Yeah. Becketide if you need. Yeah, whatever you need. Come along. Yeah, get along, I reckon.

Yeah, please. They just change the requirement to, sorry, just double-tching. Are you still alive? Yeah, that's right. Fantastic. Come on down. Start of nine. He was trained as a gunner to operate and load the howitzer heavy field guns

and was then sent to the Western Front in June 1916, leaving Ethel four months pregnant with his extended family. Ethel received money, a pension from the Ministry of Pensions in the War Office, which could be accessed once a week at the post. office via a ring paper. This is a thing I'd never heard of before, but I'm going to mention it a bit. These ring papers were issued to the wives and children of soldiers and sailors sent off on active duty.

The names of the dependents were given to the war office by each servicemen. A numbered ring paper was then issued to the dependent, with wives receiving a bit over six pounds a week. All they had to do was go to the nominated post office, hand over the numbered ring paper that showed their name. and then this was checked off a ledger and they get the cash. Six pounds doesn't sound like a lot, but I think it was a decent amount of money.

It's because this story goes over 20 or 30 years. Yeah. But I think at one point it was like, yeah, at a couple of zeros to the end. So I think it's like maybe 600 bucks in today's money, something like that, I think. Fuck, I know. That's not bloody bad.

But Ethel was bored and lonely. Stuck in Eccles, she kept herself amused by going to the shops and spending the money. Rather than hand the money to her mother-in-law to help with living expenses, Ethel spent it all on clothes, shoes and going to the movies, which led to some pretty heated disagreements with her mother-in-law, so Ethel moved back into her father's home. In early November 1916, a letter arrived from the war office.

Alec was missing in action, presumed dead. Ethel's world crumbled. She took to her bed and refused to leave. Her mother tried to coax her to eat, but all Ethel could do was cry. falling into an exhausted sleep each night. Frank Alexander Carter was born on the 26th of November 1916, but Ethel couldn't even look at her newborn baby. Her parents decided to take baby Frank away and care for him in another part of the house,

thinking their daughter would recover and care for her baby when she was better. Instead, Ethel woke one night to the sound of her baby crying, got up, packed a few things and quietly left her parents home. She headed off in no particular direction and ended up jumping on a train and jumping off at another station before the inspector was able to come come and ask her for a ticket.

She woke up. The ticket inspector's coming. She said, whoop, my stop. The station she jumped off at, she bumped into a soldier named Billy Taylor. Ethel told him her name was Ethel Smith. Just a random name she came up with. Hi, I'm Ethel Smith.

Okay. All right, that's good. It's interesting. She stuck with her name. she goes by. Yeah. First name, but maybe she got halfway through.

My name's Ethel Smith. Smith. She stayed with him for the next week, telling the landlady that they were married. Ethel was mourning the death of her husband and had fallen ill with a fever. So for the next week, Billy cared for her. After a week, Billy had to head back to the war. And this is back to Nichols' book.

I have to go back, he began. I think there's no way she had the transcripts of some of these conversations. Yeah, it's all recorded. it on our iPhone. Always recording. I have to go back, he began, stroking her arm. I'm absent without leave,

but I didn't want to leave you when you were so ill. Ethel looked at him expectantly. There were plans to make, things to organize, but before she could reply, there was a knock at the door. They looked at each other in surprise,

and then to the wooden door as it opened. When two policemen and the smirking manageress walked into the room, Ethel shrieked. You're both under arrest, the older officer stated, what for, Billy are sitting up? You're not married, are you? He started.

He stated looking at them as Ethel tried to hide under the duvet. You're both under arrest for giving false information to a lodging housekeeper. That was the charge of the rest. Oh my God, it's the laziest one ever. To a lodging housekeeper. You can't lie to a landlady. It's not right. You're nicked.

Yeah, no, but I, you know what, now that I think about it, that makes sense. I think that's a real dog act. Just the ethics around that. The ethics of not telling a woman whose business it definitely is to know that you're married when you're not. Yeah, that's what I was talking about. I said, is she a badass or is she just bad? She's terrible at this point. Wow.

That poor landlady, do you think that she had to pay her some damages for that? Yeah, I think there might have been some emotional damages. Imagine the therapy she'd need. And then she came and said her last name was Smith. The most common name there is. Didn't even respect me with coming up with a new name. She told me they were married. I knew they were.

She wasn't wearing a ring. I was listening to it through the wall and I thought, well, everything's fine because they're married. But now it just keeps going around and around of my head. They were sitting. I heard a sin. Ethel didn't see Billy until the trial. She missed him and also thought he might be able to get a ring paper for her to collect money while he was back at the front. She's incredible.

Put a ring on it. Yeah. That's where it came from. So where wedding rings come from. I think, yeah. First was the ring papers. And then they went, you know what? Let's use that symbol of the ring paper.

And first they were like, I don't know. Yeah. Like blue ringed octopus. We could give everyone who gets married a blue ring doctor's. But people started dying from the stings. How do you take care of them? Yeah. You got to have some sort of.

sort of water. And then they eventually settled on a fingering. Oh, we all settle on a fingering. So in the trial, it turned out, and this was news to Ethel, that Billy was married with children. Billy, you dog. You dog, you low dog. But to be fair, all he was doing was looking after her while she was ill, right? To be fair, she's also married with a child.

Yeah. Ah, yes. So really he was just being a good person, and I suppose probably, you know, from being married with children. he's a nurturer. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I think they were boning as well. No, no, no, no, no. She's had a fever.

But that's between the lines. Dick fever. I've got deep fever. I've got a fever for dick. Is it another one of the poetic licenses the author took? Made the character's real horny. The next section is deeply erotic.

Throbbing member. The police guy. I'm in, but they're stripper, police. Yeah. You're under arrest, Ethel. You've been a bad, bad girl. Ethel. You've got to think of the porn name for this movie by the end of the episode two, please, Dave. What did you call the episode?

Well, the book is called The Amazing Miss Liversy. Okay. But you're going to have a few names of hers to work off if one hits you better than that. Something is swindles, surely. Something there. Swindles. Swingers or something I don't know

Not to step on your toes Dave please Just someone for you to help brew Yeah Mullen over Mullen So this was news to Athlon She was pissed

That she heard that Billy was married with children Yeah How dare he She's also married Although she does think her husband Is dead in the war She thinks

So that doesn't count Well they didn't find a body No wedding that ever occurred Quite recently matters because he's dead. Fuck, and out. Fucking out, my. Widows back then, tell you what,

not like they widow today. No, they'll wait at least a couple of weeks. But I think, yeah, it sounds like she was, she thought their relationship was going somewhere. She thought it was going to ring papers and her getting six pounds a week. Yeah, that's what she's annoying. So what now would she be getting 12 pounds?

Well, maybe. She's a know that someone's already, claimed that six. That's what he's about. Yeah. Yeah, that's right. She's like, I'll split it. I'll split it.

I'll go three pounds. She was in the, his wife was in the courtroom and she was, she was obviously pretty hurt as well by all of it. Oh, my fucking dog. So, Heather was so pissed that in the trial, she turned on Billy when it was her turn to tell her side of the story to the magistrate, telling him that Billy had hoodwinked her.

She was convincing, as she was let free while for his crime of lying to an innkeeper. No. Billy was sentenced to six months in jail. Fuck, imagine if he was sentenced to death or something. But still, this is during your time where they're so desperate for soldiers, they're like, actually, this is, this, honestly,

I'd rather let Hitler win than you go unpunished. I think that was kind of the vibe. The judge is like, you're not worthy of being out there as canon fodder. He's like, oh, thank God. Yeah, honestly, six months in prison or go to war. Bit of a chance to work on yourself. I'd be going to prison. Do some reading.

Don't have to do any cooking. Or like, I don't have to vacuum. Don't have to do the groceries. You don't have to shoot at a stranger. You don't have to do that at war either. Okay. Yeah, all those things you described are benefits either way. Yeah, but then you've got to be, there's a lot of like sleeping outside and trench foot and stuff.

I don't want to do that. Oh, yeah. You're thinking World War I as well probably because that's the relevant one to this story. I was surely they were still getting dysentery. World War II, were they shitting themselves? That's true. I don't want to shit myself. If I have the choice of shit yourself or not shit yourself.

Shit yourself or get shivd yourself? I take the risk of getting shiv, to be honest. I'm pretty big. I reckon in a women's prison. Yeah, you'd kick the shit out of quite a lot of people. I think in any prison. I don't think they'd fuck with me. I think you'd be the one shiving.

Yeah, I'd do some shivin. Get ready. Get ready. what is it? Get busy shiven. Yeah, that's what I'm trying to say. Get ready. Get ready.

What are they saying? What's the thing? Get to shiven or get to shivin. Nope, that's not it. Someone must have, that must be a line someone's used before. Get busy shivin or get busy dying. That's good stuff. I'll get that tattooed.

It should be get. With a shiv, homemade tattoo. Yeah. Get busy shivin or get busy dying. And then in smaller text. by Shiv. Shiv will be shiv. Oh, that's good.

That's more succinct. And that's a picture of Shiv from that show where there's a character called Shiv. Yeah. Is it just my cousin Shavon, who we call Shiv? That show where the main guy

always says, fuck off! Succession. Succession, thank you. Haven't even seen it. Again, it's because of his impression. You're so good at that. God, you're good, Matt.

It's so good. Even though you don't know. the other side of it. Like you hear him saying it, you're like, huh, that doesn't even sound like the same words. Anyway, so quickly putting it behind her, this whole ordeal. Just let Billy go to jail for lying. Well, she, I think she helped put him there by saying,

he did, he got me hoodwinked. I think she was a word she used. So then Ethel headed to the resort town of Blackpool, which she had fond childhood memories in. Around two weeks after leaving court, she met Corporal Raymond Ward while he was on rest and recreation leave from the war. The two married the following day just before he returned to the battlefield. Okay, she's pretty keen to marry.

She must be hot or just like really charismatic. Or there just weren't many women options around. Or like you know tomorrow you're going to war, probably going to die. Yeah, so why would you get married? Well, it's one way to guarantee a night with someone else. I can't. Which is the reason I got married. Yeah.

Any day now. Is that like you don't want to be a virgin in heaven or something? Oh, imagine. Imagine going to heaven. I mean to go to like the virgin bar. Be sitting with Mary on the breakfast buffet. Mary's like, hey, finally. Because that's actually how they sought you.

Yeah? Yeah. By how many fucks? Yeah. It's pretty lame. will be the other end of you and me. I'm on 10,000. No, 10 million.

It's too many fucks. Too many. I'm so tired. That's why you love the pod so much. It's a break from all day. This is the only time I'm not getting busy. Getting busy. So got married again.

Now she's sort of married twice at the same time. Now to Raymond Ray Ward. Gordon Nichols, she decided it was time to right to her father. She just, she'd run away, left her baby. They obviously was going

through some, a lot of stuff. She's like, oh, I better let him know I'm safe, but also to ask how her son's going. She had yet to mention

baby Frank to her new husband, but Ray seemed so kind. She was sure he would welcome Frank into their family. No point telling him until he returned and she'd deal with it then.

And so she'd just had baby Frank. Yeah. Yeah, there'd be some signs probably. Is that what you mean? No. If Ray was paying attention. He's still not the umbilical cordon.

But to be honest, I'm a virgin. Never seen that before, but honestly, never seen anything before. So I assume that's how it's supposed to look at. No further questions. No, I'm just thinking, but I don't want to guess it's something in case I'm right and you had it as a reveal or something. That's all. Oh, I mean, yeah.

I'd love, go on. I have a guess. I'm just wondering if she will, like, if he goes off to war for a war. while and comes back and she's like, here's our child. Oh, no. She keeps moving forward. She doesn't do a lot of looking back.

So Ray offered his parents' place to live, but she declined preferring to stay at a lodging house run by landlady, Mrs. Scarrot. Do not lie to Scarrett, though. Yeah, whatever you do. Hope you don't listen. So, yeah, she was, she didn't really want to bunker in with her new husband's family. really non-committal, isn't she?

Quick to marry, but... Yeah, it's interesting, isn't it? I won't be spending any time to go to go to the family. Because she'd have to turn... Do you think she'd have to turn up with child? Or is she still happy with a child? No, she hasn't... She hasn't gone to collect a child.

She should have gone then. Yeah, especially because it would be free, basically free rent or whatever, whereas she's gone and now she's having a pay rent, but she does have a ring paper from husband Ray. The last in-laws she fought with a lot. Yeah, so much she's like. I don't want to repeat that.

So having married another soldier, she once again had a ring paper. She could collect a wage from, according to Nickles. She filled her days going to the shops, the movies, and the theatre. On tour in the town at that time was popular actress who shared her new name, Ethel Ward.

Curious, Ethel took in her show at the majestic theatre and watched the elegantly dressed Miss Ward on stage. playing the lead role in a romantic drama. Miss Ward's hair was piled high with lace covering her shoulders and long neck as she played the wronged woman with style and grace. Ethel felt that it was her up on stage. She felt like she's, I'm here watching me.

Oh, Ethel. It was her drama, and she was watching it all unfold, an innocent woman scorned by a cruel man, in her case, Billy. I don't feel like Ethel was all that scorned at all. Was she that innocent either? They were just hooking up at the station. Yeah, I believe she also didn't tell him about her child and that her, she had a husband who...

But she's like, you, fuck. You absolute fuck. Sounds like they were just hanging out. Yeah. Both trying to forget their troubles. She was a bit sick and he was making her feel better. Yeah, it is interesting. She does, she holds a bit of a grudge there

and she does normally feel like, Even she doesn't see what she's done as wronging anyone, but she does feel it in the other direction of it. She's a badass. Ethel followed her namesake's career closely, reading magazine and newspaper articles about her. Back to Nichols. Then Ethel started going out at night, pretending to be the young actress, dyeing her hair, chestnut and wearing it in the same style as Miss Ward. She could often be found in the company of soldiers and sailors on leave, despite her husband still being at the front. Ethel told the men various stories about herself.

She was sometimes an actress, sometimes an artist, but most often her story was that her husband had been killed at the front and that she was there to forget. At that time, Blackpool was full of people trying to forget there was a war going on. After hearing of her husband's death, one soldier coincidentally called Smith, felt sorry enough for Ethel that before returning to battle,

he organised a ring paper for her, stating on it that she was his wife. She scored another ring. paper. And a bunch of STDs. Yeah. But she's still, I mean, can you blame her? She's furious. Billy cheated on her, basically.

Yeah. Billy the dog, that dog scum. Yeah. How dare he hurt her like that? And she sees that as the big heartbrage of her life, not the fact that the first husband died. Yes. That's when she married and I actually love.

I actually liked. Yeah. But the guy that looked after her while she was sick, didn't tell her about his husband. A dog. I can't believe you're bringing that dog up again. Billy, your dog. My blood is boiling. I've got to go,

fuck my way through Blackpool. Blackpool? Yeah, yeah, well yeah. And look, I'm not, you know, I'm a sex positive person. I'm just saying, Ethel, Billy. Give Billy a break, maybe give your pussy a break. You're no better than him,

because you're lying to a bunch of men. I reckon, but it's not technically a lie. A lot of it is my husband died at the front. That's right. That's true. More omission than lie. I'm here to forget what Billy did. And that I have a husband. And a child.

And a child. Yeah. Now, I guess three now that this guy's taking pity on it. So now she's making, now she's at least getting two ring papers. That's right. Yep. Ethel didn't mention a Smith, this one who forged the ring papers. she didn't mention to him that she was already married.

But now she had these two sets of ringslips and therefore two lots of wages to draw on. It was the perfect crime. The only way she could stuff it up is go to the post office to collect the money as Mrs. Ward where they know her as Mrs. Smith or vice versa. Great, but no one would never do that. No, and I'm certainly not foreshadowing anything.

Yeah, I don't know why you'd even mention that. It seems like such an easy thing to not muddle up. Yeah. It's not a Chekhov's foreshadowing sort of. of scenario. Chekhov's ring paper. It's not Chekhov's ring paper, no. Ray would send Ethel letters

from the front, and her replies were filled with love and stories about how wonderful life was in Blackpool, but they did omit the fact that she was entertaining other men. Ethel always felt better going shopping, and it helped fuel her fantasy life, and with two ring

papers to draw on, she could spend a bit more on things she wanted. Rather than move to final lodgings, her extra money was spent on more clothes and visits to the beautician and hairdresser. After all, she needed to look like the star she was. Right, she needs to extend her neck. Yeah, that's right.

That really stood out to me that line as well. And her long neck. She was a freak. She had star quality. That giraffe. I've never seen a giraffe act so well. She could reach all the tallest branches. She's in a zoo.

And there's a giraffe named Ethel. She's like, oh, that's me in that band. She's losing it might. But it was never enough. No matter what she bought, it was never enough. And soon she started telling her fantastic stories to the shop owners. The owner of one of her favorite shops, Mrs. Hall, happily listened to her stories. Ethel's stories always had a little bit of truth about them.

On top of the fantastical stuff, she told Mrs. Hall, how she was a war widow who had tragically lost her first husband, which was obviously true, or she believed to be true. but had again found happiness with her second. Ethel spent up big and Mrs. Hall didn't hesitate to offer her a line of credit. Ethel loved that shop and purchased numerous outfits, hats, bags, shoes and even a bright red feather boa, just like the Hollywood actresses wore. But after racking up an account close to 20 pounds, which is over two grand in today's money,

Ethel stopped going to the shop and Mrs. Hall began to wonder if the fabulous Mrs. Ward was ever going to settle her account. Then one Saturday evening, Mrs Hall spotted Ethel at a dance hall on a date with a sailor wearing the feather boa she still hadn't paid for. Ethel smiled at Mrs. Hall. Mrs. Hall did not smile back. According to Nichols, the following Monday morning, Ethel woke late. The weekend had been a whirlwind of fun. She had met a charming sailor and they had laughed and danced the entire weekend. He had left with promises of seeing her again when he was next on leave. laying in bed wondering what she would do that day.

She's even, this is a good thing about Nichols got in her head. Yeah, it's amazing how Nichols has got into every facet. She's just a poetic license box. That's beautiful. No, I'm loving it. Don't misread me. I love this. I love it too.

It definitely made it a more fun read. Oh, definitely, yeah. And, you know, it's all. It's painting a beautiful picture. I can see it all in my head. So she's laying in bed wondering what to do for the day. day when she heard the post arrive. She made her way it downstairs to see what was in the mail.

It was usually only bills, which she would ignore for as long as she could, but today a letter sat on the doormat bearing her father's familiar handwriting. Oh, I thought it was going to be a letter from Mrs. Hall, and she opened up as like a closh with a head on a plate. Something like that. A feather bow was head. While waiting for the water to boil, she stared at the letter. Her father would be upset with her, but he would feel.

forgive her he always had she could explain ethel suddenly snatched the letter turned it over took a deep breath and then slowly carefully opened it what is a deep breath if not a gasp she's just doing it all the time about to open this letter she couldn't believe what she was reading her father was concerned about her that's not the bit she couldn't believe baby frank was now living with her in-laws but the one sentence that caused her the most consternation was Alec is alive He had been wounded I told you thought he was dead

Oh my goodness He foreshaded it like eight times Dave Keep up Fucking hell Oh well done Dave Aren't you clever You fucking idiot My little grey cells have been working pretty hard

Oh yeah Dave's pick it up What you're putting down Thank you Matt The times you winked at me He's dead Wink I'm like oh he's trying to tell me something

Can't figure out what it is So Alec is alive Alex's alive Oh which means the second marriage Is now called into question But Billy you dog Billy's still a scumbag No doubt about that

Fuck you Billy You fucking dog A few things are question now But not that Billy is a low low dog No No, that is in concrete. So he'd been wounded but was in hospital, wanting to know where Ethel was. Her father insisted she could come home immediately and everything would be fine.

So many emotions raced through her, happiness, shame, anger, fear. While she was processing this, there was a knock at the door and it was the cops. They were there to arrest her for obtaining goods under false pretenses from Mrs. Hall. Oh my God, Ethel. According to Nichols, Mrs. Hall stood in court and told the story Ethel had given her, finishing her evidence by recounting the shameless behavior she had witnessed at the Blackpool Ballroom. Ethel's landlady, Mrs. Scarrett, she's the landlady's back then would dog you as well. Oh, I can now.

So yeah, so she... Now they're just dog her in their bloody rent prices at my right. So, so firstly, Mrs. Hall's like, this is the sub-store she gave me. she was her husband was at war but then i saw her with some sailor at this ballroom wearing the stuff that she hadn't paid for so she's saying that all in court and then ethel's land she's slut shaming her so is that what you're doing yeah that's what it feels like that it does sound like otherwise she's just saying i saw her out wearing clothes that she bought from my shop like that's not the big deal it's that she's with the sailor it does i think what she's saying is her story's bullshit

so she told her this story that meant that she gave her this line of credit and she's like She's a liar and she hasn't paid me. So her husband's away. Ethel will play. And then I saw her out, but you can't go out without your husband. If your husband's away, you can't go out. Oh, that's, yeah, no, that's true. I mean, she's slut shaming.

She was, she was saying, I guess she was saying, back then, extramarital affairs weren't as cool as they are now. Yeah, now it's cool. If you see someone cheating on their husband, you're like, yes. Now I'm like, hey. Get it. You say it, girl. Yeah, get it, girl.

Yeah. And I say, like, I don't know the ins and outs of their marriage. Who am I to define what their marriage is? Who knows what Ray is? My Ray's probably like goat. Have fun. Have fun with it. Maybe that is sexy to him.

Yeah. Maybe that's Ray dressed up as a sailor. That's fun. Roll playing. You've got to keep it fresh. Yeah, maybe they often just put all their ring papers in a bowl and whoever's they pick out. Whatever. Who am I to yuck their young?

Yeah. Well, I'll tell you who, Mrs. Hall. She should have said, she hoodwinked me. The movie they'd say that, and Ethel would be like, that's my fucking line. How fucking do you, Mrs. Hall? Now I've got two enemies. Billy and Mrs. Hall. And now Ethel's landlady, Mrs. Scerrett.

Oh, Scarrett. Who stood up and happily told all about Ethel's vast array of beautiful new clothing and costume jewelry. And most damningly, men staying at her establishment in the company of Mrs. Ward. Who's now Ethel? Yeah. Her arrest had made the evening papers, and everyone in the crowded courtroom seemed to be staring at her, which makes sense. Yeah, that's the reason they're there.

She's a bit rude. Can I help you? Is there something on my face? Take a picture to last longer. That's where that phrase comes from. Why does the jury keep looking at me? Look, they're judging me somehow. And this judge?

What are you doing? Stop staring at me. So Nichols goes on saying her world was closing in She felt so let down by Mrs. Hall, Mrs. Scarrett Yeah, by women And even her own father Which I'm not sure how she felt How's that his fault?

I don't know, I can understand her being dobed in by Miss Scarrot That would maybe that would feel shit Mrs. Hall You're like, well I did steal from you but still Bit of a dog act But then her dad I'm mad at you dad Yeah

For writing me a letter telling me my first husband's alive And saying, please come home. Come home because you've abandoned your child. And what did he say? It'll all be okay. It'll all be fine. Fuck you, Dad. Like, through all of it, he's so supportive.

You'll see that as the story goes on. I feel like she's the kind of person that just blames everyone but herself. Wow, Dave. Wow. Wow. Matt, if I could speak for both of us. Yeah. Wow.

Wow. I'm pretty perceptive as you saw before with the, I knew that the husband was alive. I knew it. So many times. he said presumed debt. So many times. I only noticed once. But that's all I needed.

I only needed one clue. I don't need 10 like Jess over here. You're pandering to her. First one you do, I'm like, lock that away for the later. We're back of the zoo. Here we go. The case wasn't looking good for Ethel until the judge announced that her father-in-law

was going to pay back the money. So this is Ray Ward, her husband. Yeah. His dad. heard about the story and he's like this is bringing shame to our family it sounds like he's doing a real good thing

but as soon as he talks to he's like you brought shame to our family yeah get the fuck out come with me I'm paying your money you'll come with me sort of thing I'm going to keep you on the straight and arrow but at first she was confused

thinking wait was that Alec Carter's dad her like her that's who when she thought her husband she thought her first husband but no it's her second husband Oh my God When she's

Figured she had You know his dad It's not Fucking Billy Yeah Where's he Yeah Where's Billy's dad

How only is Billy a dog Hey Apple doesn't fall far From the tree Where's Mr Billy Yeah Hey Where's Billy senior

I bet he's cheating on Billy's mum Yeah for sure A couple Fucking dogs Fucking dogs The billes Probably at the pound

Where he belongs That sick dog Um So Ray's father bailed her out and like I said he's like all right you're coming with me now though the magistrate then sentenced her

to a two year good behaviour bond when maybe she would have otherwise served time okay well don't lie to landlady's shit you don't lie to Mrs. Scarrant so because Mr Ward was saying you've brought our family to the distraput you're coming to live with us now

until Ray's back Ethel had other ideas She said All right Before I come over I've just got to pick up Some stuff from my apartment So they went to her apartment

And she shoved things into her bag And then fled Yeah He came into the room She sort of hoodwinked him Yeah Hey Oh

Maybe she learned that from Billy Yeah And she She went down to the station Holding a You know stuffed bag And she bumped into a man named Fred Lee

Are you kidding me? What's his name, Fred Lee? Fred Lee. Train stations are just a place to hook up. Yeah, real horny in the 40th. I definitely, every time I'm at a train station, I'm like, a bunch of people here, I want to fuck. Yeah, I love when a stranger talks to me at this train station. And they all smell good.

Here we go. Remember, it was it the old, that was an old free newspaper that had bumped into you section? Yeah. Hey, just in case, hey, I bumped into a guy with a guy with a guy. the red beard. Oh, my day. Every time I was reading it, I'm like, oh, yep. Here we go.

Here we go again. I remember being quite disappointed. I was never in that. Nobody was like, a girl on the Glenn Wavelu line. You took my breath away. Never. I gasped. So she bumps into this guy, Fred Lee.

Lee was a con artist himself and introduced himself saying he was a fan of Ethel's work. He was an odd kind of fellow. So it got a little bit of coverage in the newspaper. And he's like, I like what you did there. you sort of, you hoodwinked him. Amazing. Corridor Nichols, there must have been something about Fred Lee,

because despite him being a bit odd, Ethel stayed with him for a few months and worked at an illegal gambling establishment he was running, a place called the casino on Pleasure Beach. Pleasure Beach. Yeah. And it was illegal, so they obviously had to name it something that doesn't point to what it is.

Hiding in plain sight. Casino, well, obviously, that's not a casino. It's going to be a coffee shop or something, I assume. It was straight out of a. movie, though perhaps not as glamorous as she would have liked. Ethel's main job was to assess the punters, size them up, check out how much cash they had on them, and if she thought of them a light touch, invite them in for a game of cards. What started off as a convenient place to stay and earn money, quickly turned into an opportunity for her to learn how to cheat at cards and flee

servicemen out of their pay. So she learns how to cheat at cards here. For shadowing. She was playing that Dave? Yeah. Dave. That was for Jess. That wasn't for you. Yeah, no. Card chark, I'm all over it.

I've got that written down in a little pocket book over here. I need a few more hints. She was playing the role of a femme fatale and reveling in it. As well as the money she earned with Fred Lee,

she was still drawing on two ring papers as Mrs. Ward and Mrs. Smith. She enjoyed dressing up, disguising herself, wearing wigs and heavy makeup. She did, however, avoid distinctive clothing that stood out,

worried that maybe Mrs. Hall or someone else would recognize her. No more red feather bowers. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, that was a bit too bold, I think. She was managing just fine until she turned up at the post office where she was known as Mrs. Ward

and presented the puzzled postmistress with the ring papers for a Mrs. Smith. Hang on a second. I think Matt might have said something to that effect earlier on. He did. Realising her mistake, she grabbed the ring paper back

and left the post office as quickly as she could. I've forgotten who I am. Goodbye. Good day. She had stuffed up and that sweet gravy train was coming to a halt.

Oh no. Oh my God. Fred Lee told her to chuck out the Smith ring paper as she didn't have a marriage certificate to back it up. And then she went to London to lay low. Staying with Fred Lee's mate,

Ernie Stevens, she was now going by the name Ethel Stevens. Oh my God. Apart from when she was picking up her remaining ring paper payment, then she was obviously Mrs. Ward. Whilst in London, Ethel went shopping and found a great hat she really wanted but couldn't afford. She started spinning a tail to the shopkeeper,

but accidentally switched her name from Mrs. Stevens to Mrs. Ward mid-story. Realising her mistake, she left the shop, but before long, just around the corner, a man's voice called out to her, Mrs. Stevens? She didn't want to turn her. She's like, what's going on here? And they goes, or is it Mrs. Ward?

She turned to see a policeman. The shopkeeper had narked. What? Like, what the, are these shopkeepers who just, they just, oh my God, the scandal? I can, I understand the Mrs. Ward, the Mrs. Whatever her name was who she owed two grand to. Totally. Yeah.

But the person who's like, I was about to try and scam the government out of a few hundred pounds. Yeah. Or you're a hat. You sell hats. You're a hat. You're a hat. Let's say you're a hat. No, that's right.

Sorry. Yeah, this was the hat one. Yeah. Or you're a hat. You're on the shelf. You think, oh, this lady's going to take me away. Might live on her head. But then you hear she's got two names and you think, I'm going to call the police.

Yeah, that's right. It didn't work. That's the thing. Look. But also like... What's the crime? What's the crime? The crime is...

Having two names? A succulent... What if she just got married? And she wasn't used to a new married name yet. That's true. Why are you jumping straight to fraud? But unfortunately she was busted and the cop searched her and found the ring papers of both Mrs. Ward and the fraudulent Mrs. Smith won two,

which she hadn't thrown out despite Fred Lee's suggestion. What? So if she didn't have that paper on her, it would have been like, it just gave, apparently it was enough of a reason at the time for the policeman to search her and that got her in trouble.

So she was going back to court. And in court, various post office workers who had paid out money to Ethel using the different aliases testified, as did a policeman who said Ethel offered sex in exchange for destroying evidence.

Ethel. Apparently fraudulent, apparently fraudulent use of ring papers was on the rise and the magistrate wanted to make an example of her and he sentenced her to six months hard labor at the infamous Strangeways Prison. Do you have you heard of Strange Ways? Strange Ways Here We Come is the name of. An album by The Smith?

The Smith, yeah. That's right. So, yeah, apparently it's often referenced in British pop culture. There's also a song by Deep Purple and a poem by John Cooper Clark. Anyway, so she's in the big house for the first time. According to Nichols, 300 women were housed in four wings at Strangeways, the notorious home of murderers and Irish political prisoners. Ethel was in there for swindling a few extra dollars, not killing anyone.

To her, it all seemed very unjust. Yeah, well, get ready, get ready shiven. As they say. As they say, get ready shiven. But she's so, Dave said before, she's like blaming everybody but herself. and now she's like, it's not fair that I'm in here. That person murdered someone.

All I did was a lot of fraud. Yeah, that's right. So, Strangeways in Manchester was cramped, dark and damp, and her stint there was the lowest point of her life. The other female prisoners were horrible, the warden's cruel, and the work monotonous and hard. I like complaining about the work in prison. Oh, the hard labour I've been sentenced to his heart.

It's monotonous. I can't get it. a promotion. I'm constantly overlooked. I'm certainly not being rehabilitated. No. If anything, this is just a bloody criminal factory. This is habilitating me.

Six months later, she was out again and working with Lee once more. According to Nichols, Fred would introduce her to poor bloke straight off the Western Front. She'd charmed them and tell them she wanted to marry them. Then ask for money for wedding clothes and an engagement ring before finally disappearing, leaving the men wondering what had happened. Fred would look out for her and they'd split the money. It was pretty brutal. That's great.

Pretty badass. They're always on a date and there's just a guy watching him. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, don't worry. He's with me. That's all good. He's like, oh, yeah.

He's like a... Oh, yeah, love. Don't worry about me. I'm a con man. Have you asked him for the money yet? Just your friendly local. Oh, con man. Well, pick a car, sir.

At the end of the war in 1918, she finally decided to head home to face the music. Ethel told them she'd been working with the foreign office as an undercover spy. This is what she's telling her parents. God, that's good. Journeying into France and Belgium incognito as a commercial traveler. Her story was patted out with details about different places she had heard about, from the return servicemen she'd fleeced in London. Street names, famous places,

vivid descriptions of war-torn lands. So she's just sort of like taking in all the stuff as she's... She's a sponge. Yeah, what's your favourite street in Belgium? Great. Mine's a scientist. Avenue. Yeah, I love a scientist having you.

A lot of great architecture on that avenue. Her dad was stoked to see her again and proud of her stories while her mother was having none of it. She couldn't understand why her daughter hadn't come back sooner to see her first husband return from war and her son. She's like, you thought he was dead and he came back to laugh and you haven't even... Come back. You haven't come back to...

And then is her husband like, hang on, why are you referring to me as your first husband? She's also spent no time with her kid. Yes. Like, got annoyed that a baby was crying and just left. Never came back. Yeah, and seemingly not really even that curious about him. Yeah. That sucks.

Ethel told her mother that she would go visit Alec right away. Her dad asked if she needed money. She said she did. She took some cash from her dad and left, saying, I'll go visit Alec. I'll be right back. But instead of heading to Alex, she went back to London. She quickly spent her dad's money on fancy clothes. Within days, she met and married returning soldier Al Spurges.

What? And they partied together celebrating the end of the war. but when her new husband's finances ran out, she left. Nichols continues. So that was it. That was a quick marriage, that one. Wow. Ethel was on her first outing in another new outfit to celebrate the last of her father's money

when she met Captain William Thornton. Sorry, that's over the start. Captain William Thornton Norman Giblett. Giblett is such a fucking great name. Ghiblet. Oh, my God. Captain Giblet. Captain Giblet.

That's so good. Billy Giblet. Billy Giblet. Oh my God. Billy Giblet? That's a rock star. That's very good. Billy Giblet was waiting to be sent back home to Australia.

Tall, dark and handsome. Billy Ghiblet, or Norman Ghiblet, as he went around, but missed opportunity to me. Giblet was a ticket away from the mess in England. Norm had been one of the first to sign up when war was declared. He was in the first landing at Gallipoli and was quickly promoted to second lieutenant or lieutenant. before evacuating with the rest of the troops and being sent to the Western Front. There he was promoted to lieutenant and then captain and was awarded the military cross and bar for Gantry in September 1917

at the Battle of Polygon Wood. He had everything Ethel was after, security, respectability, good looks, he was even a proper war hero. All of that and the prospect of starting a new life in a new country. Her name was Daphne Pollard, she told him, with a laugh when they first. met. She laughed. Daphne Pollard.

Yeah, she couldn't laugh. She's like, that's such a ridiculous name. And he said, I'm Captain Giblett. She went, perfect. Yeah, great. Okay, we're both taking the piss here. She named herself after an Australian silent movie star saying, Pollard was her married name, though.

You know, but her married name to the guy who died in the war. Yeah. Oh, so she's free to marry him? Yes. She told him her husband died in the war And her parents were dead as well She told him she was a spy in the war Just as she told her parents

What's confusing to me as well Is that her dad was like Okay, so you're gonna go see Alec, that's great Do you need money? And I'm thinking like, do you need taxi money? Yeah, yeah Do you need like a few bucks? But he obviously gave her a chunk of cash

Yeah, she's like, I need $15,000 right now Okay, no worries Sure, thanks, sweetie I was only taxi money there and back. It's just good to have you back. That is another thing that maybe is a bit confusing because, you know, it's not like she's desperate and on the run because she has no other options.

Yeah. She has a comfortable living at home. Yeah. Her dad is willing to give her the world pretty much. He's doing well in business with his cotton stuff going on. And of course you can sort of look at it and go, well, there's obviously things going on for her psychologically. and all that.

Of course, you can be sympathetic to that. But she is callous. Yes. Like, postnatal depression doesn't make you do this. No, I wouldn't have thought so.

This is horrendous. Yeah. And to still somehow be like, Billy, you don't. I know. Just make up a new name and meet this new guy.

Oh, he's Australian. Good. I need a fresh start. There's nothing for me here other than my child, first husband and a loving family. Second husband.

He's third husband. This is her fourth now Because she, the guy, she just spent all his money and left within days. That's all we talk about him. There's so much in here that Al Spurgis is not mentioned again. Sorry, Al. And an incredible name. We didn't give him the respective deserves.

That's right. I mean, it's amongst many great names in this story. Incredible. But we're up to Captain Giblets. Ghiblet. Oh no. We're on an upward trajectory for sure. Can you call your balls, your giblets at all?

Well, only in private. How do you know about that? Get a load of these giblets. You know, I say stuff like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Improv to the mirror. Ah, I'm a floor. And then I gasp.

To the doctor. Get a lot of these, giblets. And they're like, I just needed your blood pressure. You do not need to take your pants off. You better have a feel of that. Is that normal? Is that normal? Is that a normal?

Is that a normal jiblet? So now the war was over. She told Jiblet or Giblet that she was uncertain what she would do. Captain Giblet fell for the eloquent brave war widow and her story. And when she suggested marriage, he happily agreed. It was time to celebrate life after the war. They married in England before setting sail for Sydney.

Oh, that's fun. In Australia, where Ethel began her life as Mrs. Daphne Giblet in a weatherboard house Norm built for them. According to Nichols, Ethel really wanted this marriage, this new identity, this new shot at life to work. But she wasn't prepared for how dull life would be in the outer suburbs of Sydney,

especially as Norm kept a tight string on their finances. She's like, perfect life, apart from the fact that, I'm used to, like, she's very used to freewheeling lifestyle. So all of a sudden being in another country in the suburbs and, you know, I guess living in what is nearly the 20s, I don't know, I'm not sure what it was like, but I'm guessing housewives weren't that. Part of she'd held onto that house in Sydney.

She could sell it for $80 million today. Oh, my God, it would be worth. so much, yes. Wow. So she'd be rich today. Just, just saying it. Just saying. Stuffed up there.

Stuffed it. Eventually, Ethel convinced Giblet that life in the Sydney suburbs wasn't for her, and he rented an inner city apartment for her to live in, and he visited her on weekends. He got visitation. She just was like, hey, so love you. Just don't want to live with you. You can come visit, though. Get me a nice spot, a bit closer to town.

Ethel wrote to her dad telling him, because the last thing her dad's heard is she's just popping over to visit Alec and coming back. She's like, wow, they've obviously made up. Yes. She's living with Alec now. So Ethel wrote to her dad telling him she met with Alec, which she didn't. But it didn't go well. And then said, but after it didn't go well, I'm married an Australian and I'm now living in Sydney.

Which would have been like, what? What? But you're only at? Doesn't he live quite close to Alec and can probably... Confirm that story did not happen. They're both in the same town. Alec, did you see her buying a chance? No, absolutely not.

Why are you lying to me, Alec? You're not like that Billy. You know about Billy? I don't know. He's been watching the whole time. So yeah, and she obviously, she left out the detail of that other little marriage in between. Yeah. She'd been married twice since he last saw her.

Oh my God. Honestly, I know a lot of people say like you love your children unconditionally. I think if this was my child, I'd be like, I don't have a lot of love left. I don't like you very much. You know? Yeah. She's a big old disappointment.

Wow, they're strong words from a mother. You made you so laugh. Pictureing you as a mother to a five times married war widow. I'm like, I can see it. Honestly, this is disappointing at this point. This is your fury. Yeah. Sitting at home in Manchester.

So she and her dad started becoming regular pen pals. Her updating him on life in Australia and him, her on life in England. Three years into their marriage, hey? Not bad. Not bad. Giblet found the letters and asked who Frank Swindells was. His name was on the thing. She neatly tied them up at her apartment.

Yeah, right. And they were just on a desk. He said, oh, who's Frank Swindells? And she picked up the bundle of letters, ran to the fireplace and threw them in the fire. That's not suspicious at all. No. She's so good at telling stories and getting people to believe them. You couldn't say an uncle?

Yeah. She throws something to the phone and goes, sorry, what was your question? I didn't hear it. Did you say something out to do? Sorry, is that the kettle? Yeah, I thought it was just a little cold in here, you know? I thought we'd get the flames going up a little bit. Anyway, I love you.

Can you go home? now? It's my apartment. My apartment. It obviously... Single bed only. It made him a little more suss. He's like, wait, what's going on?

And eventually she came clean about everything, or pretty much everything, including the fact that she was already married before marrying him. Giblet immediately filed for divorce. Look, fair. Fair enough. I'd be pretty upset, I think. You're one of my three current husbands. Okay.

Okay. But, I mean, the others are in a different country, so they're not a threat to you, baby. Work it out, babe. Baby. I need my apartment. Ethel then reverted back to the name Daphne Pollard. Probably laughing about it as she did. Such a funny name.

And she moved into the stylish Australia Hotel, which is where that wedding reception was. We were talking about earlier. Within weeks, she was engaged to another decorated soldier, Captain Midford Stanley Horn. Captain Horn. That's good. That's a good name. He can be in that, poor. No.

Yeah. It could be in a Captain Pono. Porn, Captain Horn. Is that anything, Dave? That's great work. Can you work that in somewhere? Is that something? We'll put that in the script.

They had a big, extravagant wedding, but within days, she stole his life savings and fled. Oh my God, Daphne! She handed birth. What? Up for a second. I'm like, who's Daphne? It's only the funniest name we've ever heard. That's right.

So I can't remember because I'm always laughing when I think of it. She headed back to England where she met and married an Australian businessman named George Anderson. So she's left Australia to go to London and married an Australian. And is this marriage number six now or seven? Oh, you'd be doing better than me. Yeah, we should have kept track from the start. I've no idea. Yeah, it feels like, yeah, that feels like in the ballpark.

Because then it was also like fake ones just to get the ring slips and then. Yeah, two of the original guys. Then that guy, Alan. Then the captain's... Six or seven. Jiblets. Now, then the one she stole, that's five. So this is number six, I think.

Yeah. I really, yeah, six sounds right. Maybe seven. She had, so, yeah, so she's now with Anderson. And then six months into their marriage, she had a baby from one of her relationship. back in Australia, naming the child Frank again. Wait, okay.

She's named both children, Frank. Yes. There are so many names. Her dad's name's Frank. So she's just naming all of her kids Frank. It seems like that or she's just like, that first one didn't really count. She doesn't,

she doesn't really think about it. Oh my God. It's one. Yeah. So six months into a marriage she has. Six months into meeting him. Okay. Is he like, oh, six months?

Yeah, I guess that probably would have been a conversation, but he was cool with it and was listed as a child's father on the birth certificate, despite having met Ethel only six months before he was born. Yeah, but it was the 20s. They didn't know how long pregnancy was. They can go for however long, you know. This one was just cooked ill as done. Ding, ready to go.

That's how good I am. That's how good I am. That's how good I am. I can get a nine-month pregnancy done in six months. Yeah. You're welcome, babe. You're welcome. The following year, the young family sailed to Shanghai.

I'm trying to, this, so she's currently, what was her name? Anderson? Yeah, Daphne. Is she still Daphne? And so, but she's stolen the life savings of one of her ex-husbands. Horn. Captain Horne. So she's like, she's got money now as well.

She spends it as soon as she gets it pretty much. She steals a lot of money and just spends it real quick. What's the point? Save, you know? Put 30% aside, Daphne. Has she hasn't read the Barefoot Investor? Have you not? You've got buckets, right?

All you want to do is. You're putting it all in the splurge account. Yeah. What you need is a bit of a rainy day situation. Yeah, you know that rainy day. It's wild how much like that's just people know those sort of things. Like that's, at least in Australia anyway. I mean, I've read the Barefoot.

You've read the barefoot investor. I've skimmed it. Okay. So they sailed to Shanghai. Shanghai in the 1920s was going off. It was not like China you think of today. It was metropolitan and party time, jazz bars. They're like, not the China you think of today.

Shanghai, one of the largest cities on earth. Yeah. 25 million people. It was more of like a city. Yeah. Yeah, it was a city, a place. I know what you're thinking. You're thinking tiny little fishing village.

No, no, no, no, no. None of that. The 20s, big old city. And Ethel was living her best life, partying at cocktail parties and in smoke-filled nightclubs. How old is she at this point? Well, what are we up to? You know, the 20s? She's born in 97.

So, yeah, you know, we're mid-20s, mid-to-late 20s. She's lived quite a bit. Yes. First marriage at, what, 17? That's right, yeah. Seventh marriage at 25? I know, and I forget that some of these marriages are incredibly short-lived, and there's not much of a courtship.

So, yeah, she's packing a lot of it. She's not a big quarter. While there in Shanghai, Ethel got pregnant again and headed to England to have her third son. I wish. She went for something different this time. She did. She went to William Basil, Dwight Anderson.

She's pretty great. And sort of became more known as Basil. Basil. She then sailed back to Australia to meet her husband, George Anderson. and after a long trip, she was angry to find that he wasn't there to greet her. She'd been hoodwinked.

He bailed on her. No. Yeah. This is Billy all over again. Yeah, she's been bullied again. Just as she learned to love again. She finally let someone in. After Billy had broken her heart.

And he didn't turn up. Into a million pieces. And then this guy, whose name I've forgotten. George Anderson, that's why. He's no giblets. George Anderson. I had a microseep when I say his name. Yeah, yawn.

So she's like, great he'll be here to meet me with holding the signs saying my name, even though I'm his wife. And she's just had their child? And we're going to start our life here, yeah. And he was on the birth certificate for the first child as well, but this one was actually his child. Oh, that's right. There was two there.

She was thinking, you know, they were going to go start a life that she would soon get bored of and flee, but. He fled first. fled first. So honestly, they're a match made in heaven. Yeah, that's right. They could chase each other around the globe. Beautiful.

If you flee first, they can't flee you. Yeah. That's so true. Yeah. That's how you protect yourself. That's why I always flee. Never get hurt. You hurt others.

That's right. That's why I punch everyone I meet. Straight in the giblets. You do. Punch first or be punched. That's why you're king of the prison, yeah? Yeah, that's right. According to Nichols,

Ethel was heartbroken and angry. A man had made a fool out of her again. Oh my God. And she had nothing was shot. go for it, but two young children. Yeah. Well, I mean, that's why this one is that, like, she's not normally, I mean, she's stealing all their money.

I was like, she has, she's leaving him, but she's not, she is sort of, yeah, taking all their life savings. She's lying to them. Yeah, okay. Most of the time they don't know her actual name. Pretty badass. She's pretty badass. I'm getting a tattoo of this bitch.

She's my queen. Soon after. I'm just thinking about that, how are this all, the. story started with the great-granddaughter or whatever being like, I don't know how much about great-grandma. Do you reckon you could look into it? And the Nichols is like, yeah, I've come back with the story. You're reading it going, oh no. Yeah, I don't know if I want to know this story. Apparently she was, well, I think she doesn't, she doesn't want it. Her granddaughter was, she did a bit of the press for the book release and stuff. I think she was like, she did some bad

things. She did some badass things too. But she was, she was pretty incredible. What a great con woman. She was living in a man's world. Oh, yeah. She's getting things done. But, yeah. So she's, she was fascinated by it as well. But yeah, Nichols was just like, when I was researching and she just like was obsessed with it for a few years while she was writing it, she was saying that every time she saw a new thing,

she'd yell at to her partner, Greg, you never believe what I've just read. And she's like, after a while, he's like, all right. Yeah. She's a wacky character. Let me guess. She's married someone else. Yeah, that's right. You're right.

Greg, oh my God. You're as quick as Dave Warnocky, which is a weird reference. Greg, what's for dinner? Greg would be cooking. Oh, yeah, no doubt about it. Soon after, so she's been stood up. She lands in Australia.

By that fucking dog. Billy, too, I call him. Yeah, that's true. Soon after she moved in with a man named Mr. Baker. Baker taught her how to drive. Unfortunately for Mr. Baker, though, as soon as Ethel knew how to drive, she packed the boys and left few belongings into his car and drove it away.

Holy shit, Ethel. But he's also got a bit of a tear because he's so proud. Look at how well she's doing. She did a 3.2. Oh my goodness. Staying so well with him lines. According to Nichols, soon afterwards, Ethel hired a woman called Maggie to take their clothes away for washing and pressing.

Maggie took more than their clothing, however. She completely cleaned Ethel out. The God woman again. All her beautiful jewelry that had been given to her by various men over the years. The gold wristlet watch from her father, her gold and platinum twin diamond engagement ring from Stan Horn. A beautiful memento of that brief. Is she wearing all the rings? And that's not a bit of a red flag to any of her new bows.

A diamond cluster ring, her emerald engagement ring from Norman Giblett. Her engagement ring from George Anderson with five large diamonds set into. the wide gold band. The golden diamond bar brooch Norman gave her when they finished their house in Thornley and a gold fountain pen

she'd pocketed on the trip to Australia the year before. She got jewelry just for their house being finished Yeah. That's great. Like a push present but for a house being built.

Yes. So she loved that sort of stuff. She loved jewelry and bling and that sort of stuff so she was collecting it as she went. She's a little bowerbird. Yes.

So they like shiny things? Blue things. but imagine if they like gold and stuff and you just have pet bow birds or just steal for you. Yes! That's good. That'd be sick.

That'd be a great Batman villain. Could I train my dog to see fat gold? Yes. Goose. Yeah. I think he could be a Batman villain. Put a little baler clover on it. Oh, fuck, I'd be so cute.

He wouldn't look any different. That would be you wouldn't know what kind of easy as. Back to Nichols. all her treasures, all her jewelry gone. Despite filling a complaint with the local police, all her treasures were lost. To top it off, she hadn't been able to track down her husband, George Anderson. She's gone to the police and said,

I'm missing seven engagement rings. All mine, I swear. He just really wanted to marry me. Still trying to track down George. Couldn't do. This wouldn't happen until years later when she found out he was actually already married himself. himself and had other children.

Ironically, it turned out he was a bigamist as well. Didn't you say they were a great match? Was that him? They were, yeah, they were the same person. Yeah. Although he went back to his partner, whereas she never did that. Ethel had had enough. She was leaving Sydney.

That's it. I'm done. I'm leaving Sydney again. Curiously, just before Ethel left again, there was an overnight break in at Thornley. Giblet's house. In the shop of her previous husband, Norm Giblett. Oh.

Oh, sorry, yes. Not in his house. In his shop. Police records showed a full week's trading. Just over 46 pounds was stolen, but no damage reported. Just a coincidence, perhaps, suggests Nichols. So obviously, she almost definitely just robbed her ex-husband. Fucking hell.

Who did nothing wrong? No. He did nothing wrong other than file for divorce because she, had lied for the three years they were married. Yeah. And so then she gets revenge on him for that. He had it coming. Fucking Billy or whatever his name is.

All men are billies. Not all billies. Ethel and her boys headed south, driving and sleeping in the Studebaker she stole from Mr. Baker. When they got to Cabargo, around 400 K's from Sydney, Ethel dropped her boys, Frank and Basil, off at an orphanage, age four and three. Oh my God. What?

After this, Ethel sailed back to England. According to Nichols... Jess, in shock. You're laughing at these people for gasping a lot. You've been gasping up a storm over there, young lady. She just dumped her kids at an orphanage and fucked off. Yeah, it was like at a random regional one as well, Cobargo. Oh my God.

Yes. So she dropped them off. What a badass. Absolute badass, for sure. Of all the badasses we've talked about, she takes the cake for badassery. Surely I see a Victoria Cross coming up. It must be.

Is there an award for the woman with the most children named Frank? So after this, Ethel sailed back to England Obviously leaving the boys behind Gordon and Nichols Not having much money She had to travel third class Oh can you imagine

Poor thing My heart It bleeds for her They wouldn't even let her on the upper decks Those dogs What a pack of billies She felt disrespected And she vowed to herself

That she would never travel In such a humiliating way again And that she would sink the ship I hate her I just think he's badass. I'm so humiliated. I've chosen to get on this ship, left my kids. I sold my kids to be here.

I should be up there. You, billies. Fucking Billy everywhere. Who do you work for? Is it belly? Take me to Billy. Back in England, she told her father about how her husband Anderson screwed her over and that she'd left her sons in a boys home.

Frank agreed to send her 25 pounds, approximately $2,400 a month, to support her family, and then told her to go back to Australia and look after her sons. Well, she did return, but not before marrying William Lloyd Thompson in Manchester. On the way to the ship, I guess, took all his cash. They split a cab and then she's like, do you want to get married? Do you want to get married? Can I have your credit card details? So they married in Manchester,

she took all his cash and spent it on a first class fair back to Australia, leaving him behind. These trips take so long as well. Yeah, and this is all happening in quick succession, really. The longest gaps are just her on a ship for a bit. If I do like two international trips in a year, I'm like, fuck get out. Look at me.

I'm exhausted. I spent half my year on a plane. Because it's so far. But you're never in a year. first class. Oh, that's true actually, yeah. Then I'd want more. Yeah.

This is weeks on a boat. And she's just got back. Dad's sending her so much fucking money. Yeah, ongoing every month. And then back she goes. But do you think she gets on the boat? She's first class now and goes, huh?

Remember me? And they're like, no. No. What? There's multiple boats. Of course not. Yeah. Oh, oh shit.

She's, everything's just very impolour. Like, it's not really thought through. She's definitely not planning ahead at all. You could get dad's money by just writing him a letter. Yeah. Saying he screwed me ever. Why do you have to go all the way to back to London and then come back to Australia?

And yeah, it's obviously just like very compulsive behavior as well. Because she could, she's, she's got access to so much cash. And she has. And I mean, even if she hadn't stolen all that money, she could, she could just set herself up and live solo. but, you know, whatever. I don't want to tell her out of live her life. No. His husband number eight, Lloyd, just on the dock,'s waving and going,

I'll be on that boat soon. Oh, hang on. How's this plane come and pick me up and drop me off on there? Oh, I'll catch up to you somehow. Bye, darling. See you there. See you, love. So all of these men that she's marrying is, sorry, I'm gasping so much now, I've got hiccups.

All these men that she's marrying are now also, like, they can't really remarry. because they're married to her. Yeah, they have to figure out how to, and some of them do get divorced or in all their marriages, but yeah, some of them are just, because I think, do you need her signature on it? I don't know, I've never been divorced.

So you have to go. One of my proudest achievements is I've never been divorced. You give a time. Some of it, I think like at least they have to go through a long process. Yeah. I know at one point I read one of them got it done pretty quick, but another guy was taking him years, to figure it out, go on to courts and whatnot.

So once back in Australia, she collected her blue Studebaker and drove to Cobargo where she left her kids nearly a year earlier. She told the nuns she was going to take her boys for a short drive around the countryside, but she never brought them back, sort of kidnapping them. So she couldn't just take her own children back? Yeah, I don't know. It sounds like it, or she just, that's just how she did things. They were like, you can have them.

They're your children. Honestly, it's rare the parents come back. So we're thrilled to see you. Please take your children. She's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, just visiting. They'll be back. Just going to feel a drive with the boys. The boys love a drive.

Say hello to the boys. We got them, boys. You're coming back with Mummy for now. So the family then moved to Elwood in the suburbs of Melbourne. She liked it there being near St. Kilda with the Palais Theatre and Luna Park. It reminded her of Blackpool in England, which had a lot of fond memories of. Was that the Palais recently?

Remember we were going to do a live show at the Palais? Yes. Whatever happened to that? COVID. COVID. Yeah, there was a podcast festival that got cancelled. Yeah, it's great. Because I was watching as a Neil Young tribute show, kind of,

with some Aussie rock legends in a little supergroup. And it was great. And I'm like, well, this theatre is so sick. It's so great. And I think Cram maybe mentioned that and remind me I'd forgotten about it

that developers were going to knock it down and build apartment buildings out. It's like wouldn't that be what a waste that would be

but yeah apparently it was close to happening so I'm glad it it's got a lick of paint it's looking great I don't even if you love it so much

you could live there if you love it so much why don't you marry it? Huh? That's a good point and Ethel did she fleeced that building for all its work

so they're now living She probably tried to fuck Luna Park or something. Oh yeah. That big mouth. That's why I've got such a good grin. So she lied about her boys' ages so they could be enrolled in school.

So she said they're older than, she was saying they're older than they are. That one's 17. That one's 15. Well, they're like four and five now or something. They were three and four. And she's like, they're all good to. Yeah, no, she should give them a job at the bank here. Because she doesn't, she doesn't want to actually have to look after them.

But so if you can send them off to school most of the day, you can do nights and weekends. smothering easy. Piece a piss. Bees a piss. So yeah, she sent him to school and then started spending her day shopping. Not always paying and often using checks that would bounce. Under the name Gloria Ethel Gray, Ethel found herself in court once again. She took the name Gloria Gray based on an American actress of the same name who she was

fashioning herself on now. So she obviously, she just, she wants to be a Hollywood star. He's never made any sort of effort to go towards Hollywood or do any acting. Is it like now me walking around and being like, yes, I'm Tom Cruise? And then people going, oh, well, like the actor. And you're going, yeah, amazing coincidence. Parents hadn't heard of him. Named me Tom.

Yeah, that's the weird. So some people, it seems like she's going, no, I'm actually Tom Cruise. And then other people are like, yeah, funny coincidence, no relation. But we're both stars in our own ways. Anyway, I'll be paying for this in check. Yeah. So after the trial, the jury deliberated for four hours before finding Ethel guilty on two counts of fraud. But they asked the judge to be lenient in sentencing as Ethel was a single mother.

She copped a 50-pound fine and a three-year good behaviour bond. From there, she moved to Adelaide as Lady Betty Anderson. Lady. Yeah, she gave herself a title. Betty Anderson. A upgrade. Lady Betty. Lady Betty.

Did she take it the kids? Yes, she's with the kids, she's with childs. And she was also known there as Mrs. Gardner, after Joseph Gardner, who she was now living with. So she had a couple of aliases on the go. Ethel started accruing fraud charges after conning various businesses out of goods and services. She dressed posh, told people what they wanted to hear,

and was seemingly able to charm anyone. It's a funny thing, like you go, I'm rich. why would I steal from you? That's sort of the logic and it worked for her time after time. Yeah. She was kind of rich though as well. Like, yeah. She was charged multiple times but didn't show up to court on numerous occasions.

That's a good way to dodge it actually. Yeah, that's right. Just don't turn up. Yeah. How can they sentence you if you're not there? Sentence doesn't count if you don't hear it. They're always like, fuck, they're good. She's so good.

He's getting away. Instead of showing, up she just move. Brilliant. Love that. Full proof. She's crime in the olden days are so much easier. Pre-internet and you just go,

now you'd be like, it'd just be on every database, photos of her, goes by, who knows what name she goes by, but I've got a lot of different names. I thought that at the start of the story, but then there's also times where there's like seven people from like different post offices being like, yes, I've seen her casich.

Have they found all these people? Or landlady's being like, oh, I've been keeping a little book of notes on this lady. Yeah, what a creep. All these people that are just dying to testify. Yeah, true, just to do something. It was really boring. It was boring back there. Yeah, it was very boring.

Well, like we started the story, there were just strangers who wanted to be out the front of this wedding of these people. And they were, I don't think I said the line, I'll ever say it later, but apparently they were all excited. as every limo rocked up and guests came out and they were like, wow, who do you think that is? They never know who they were. They were just like, wow, speculating. I bet they're important. Oh my God. So funny.

Humans have done some truly amazing things and then sometimes you're like, why do we still exist? Why doesn't a media just knock us all out, you know? One can I only hope. Fingers crossed. I would welcome the sweet, sweet release. So she was charged multiple times but didn't show up to court on numerous occasions. I've already said that, ever know? Yeah.

So after being a no-show to court, she forfeited a 50-pound bond. Her passport and checkbook for the account. Her father was depositing money into was also taken. These were all in police custody. So she just, she had like this one thing, she had to like guilt free. If you can feel guilt free about your dad just paying for you to live, there's money just coming to her. You can because he's a dog, remember that.

Oh, that's right. Take the money of the dog. He's absolutely dog to you. But yeah, she's by not showing up to that court, she loses. She can't access that money anymore or leave the country because she's lost her passport. And the check, yeah, and of the 50 pounds. Bond as well. More and more, she was leaving her young boys for days at a time to fend for themselves,

usually leaving enough food and they'd take themselves to school and back and there'd be food there. Apparently they'd come home and they'd see how much food there was and they were like, oh, she's gone for two or three days. And they could tell by the amount of food. That's so sad. But then one time there was no food and she didn't come back. She didn't come back for days until luckily her neighbors noticed they came by. and the boys were taken by child welfare.

She left Adelaide without them, heading to a country town to work as a living nurse for an elderly woman named Mrs. Hunt, now known as Nurse Florence Anderson. She worked for Mrs. Hunt for nine days, collecting a wage as well as a bunch of Hunt's jewelry before heading back to the Victorian border. This was a thing she used a bit.

She had this story. I was a nurse in the war. I love looking after sick people to love it. That's all I'd like to do. So I'll look after your mum. Where's her jewelry? No reason.

I just, you know, sometimes I think, you know, people say laughter is the best medicine. I disagree. I put all of a woman's jewelry on her and it just makes her feel good. I mean, if you look a million dollars, you'll feel an million dollars. I'm sorry, which one of us was a nurse in the war?

Correct. Yes, thank you. point me in the direction of your mother's jewelry, please. And go, because I've got it from here. I want you to go and relax, far away. That's what I'm here for. I'm here to take the pressure off you and off this safe, which the combination is.

I'm going to need you to give me a three, four day head start. I mean, I mean. I'll do. Don't worry, I'll leave. Your dog is in great heads. No, it's my mum. Yeah, your mom, whatever. I leave four days of cruscets on the table.

She'll sort herself out. She can find a spread or something if she wants it. I don't know. What's wrong with a plain crusket? Some people say they're dry. I'll say, get a glass of water. I'll write a little bit of water. Jeez.

Chris. High maintenance. So next, Ethel headed. So she left Mrs. Hunt and headed to Ballarat, where she morphed into Mrs. Horton, the wife of real person, Sir Samuel Horton, someone she'd never met, a wealthy Sydney businessman. You might know the Horton Pavilion in Sydney that's named after him. As Mrs. Horton, Ethel went around town collecting goods and services under the pretense that

her rich husband was soon coming to town to fix everyone up. Oh, don't worry. My husband, Sir Horton. He'll come and fix this up in a few days. She's going to the bakery like, I'll have one cream bun. Do you worry, Mr. Horton, Sir Horton, we'll be here in a couple of days to fix up my account with this cream bun. It'll be the first thing he does is goes around and visits all the little shops I've been. Actually, I'll have a Boston bun for the road.

Once again, Mr. Horton will be paying for that. Who's fooling for that? Because the thing is they're like, oh my God, he's got a famous businessman. He'll come to my shop. So I should walk in and say, hello, I'm Jessica Packer. Carrie Packers' Life He'll be in tomorrow

to pay for this gold chain and Boston Bunn Is this a strange shop You had? Jewelry and Buns My two favourite things I shall be your finest customer

Carrie will be very happy with this indeed My son James loves Boston Bunn And my daughter-in-law Mariah Carey? She loves a tart. Do you have any tarts?

Portuguese tarts. She loves her. My daughter. It's Mariah Carey, married James Packer. No, they were engaged for a time. I think they were briefly engaged. Wow.

I know. What a scoop. Heard it here first. Yeah. I heard it here first. I heard it here first. Anyway. Sorry, it's over.

So she's in Ballarat as Mrs. Orden. I feel like grandma lives. I wonder if she was duped. Oh my goodness. So she loved telling her various backstories to the shopkeepers of Ballarat. Unfortunately though, she told slightly different ones to them all and they like telling her stories to each other as well. Amazing that she would think you could get away with that

because other people don't talk to each other. Like people, other humans to her just exist. They are completely still and in place when she's not there. And then they come to life when she approaches them. And then she can say whatever she wants or do whatever she wants. And then she walks away and they just, little cardboard cutouts again. Like she just had to tell the same story. Exactly.

The audacity and the stupidity is frustrating. Yeah. Sometimes these con people we hear about are very, very good at it. And they get better at it. She's not getting better at it. Yeah, normally, I feel like they normally haven't been to jail once by this point. Yeah. She's in and out of court.

And then, according to Nichols, in less than a week of arriving in Ballarat, the florist who supplied her with fresh flowers daily. So she's conning this poor woman out of daily fresh flowers for some reason. Why do you need them every day? Put them in water. They'll last a few. I think it's because, yeah, she sees herself as worthy of. of everything.

You know, she is Kerry Packer's daughter after all, or whatever she was. So, yeah, so the florist loved to tell the story of the lovely Miss Horton

to the milliner, namely that the rich lady had been a nurse in the Great War on the Western Front. The milliner was certain the florist must have been mistaken, though. As a charming new rich client told her, her she had worked for the war office and travelled incognito to the continent.

The milliner was delighted at having sold an expensive black crocodile skin handbag to such an esteemed person and was looking forward to receiving the funds from Sir Horton himself. Any day now. Sir Horton's coming to town. I'm looking forward to being paid for this item. I cannot wait to be paid for this. It's going to be a real honour. annoyed that the milliner was calling her mistake and the florist confronted Miss Horton when she passed by her shop the next morning. Ethel assured the florist, It was in fact her friend the milliner who had the facts wrong, then immediately said about leaving town, owing money to the boarding house, the forest, the taxi driver, the hairdresser

and the milliner. Ethel learn her lesson, stick to one story in a country town. Fucking idiot. That idea of her being like, oh, yeah, no, you've got it right. She's got her wrong. So embarrassing anyway, and just running out of the building. Arriving in Melbourne, Ethel was at a loss as to what to do next. so she decided to head to Perth, Western Australia.

What? Yeah. Come to Melbourne and then go, well, what do I do next? Well, I mean, first of all, take in the laneways and the coffee culture. How about that? A little bit of art at the NGV. See a game. Yeah.

The G. Yes. Sporting capital of the country. Or at least the state. Without the money to sell first class, Ethel charmed away into the Governor General's entourage as famed English opera singer Eva Turner. That's pretty,

okay, that's, I'm impressed by that. Yeah, like the governor general if, for people outside of Australia, that's kind of like

our king or queen. Is that right? So our, representative. Yeah, representative of the queen. And, yeah,

has the power to sack the prime minister, but that's only ever happened once, right? As far as I know. Yeah. Just his,

great uncle wasn't sacked? Yeah, wasn't sacked. he lost his job due to incompetence. Yeah, okay. Okay. Like an honorable man. Yeah.

You got to do an episode on him one day. I would, but I don't understand politics. Okay. So I've tried reading about it and I'm like, what does this mean? We should get like Tom Ballard in to do an episode down or something. Yeah, that'd be great. Oh, I'll still do the report, but I'd need somebody like Ballard to explain everything to me. What did that sentence me?

One of the major parties, is that right? So she conned her way onto the ship with this story. She's opera singer Eva Turner, a real famous English opera singer. When on the ship, she found an empty cabin and travelled first class as Turner. So luckily there was just an empty cabin. She's like, I'll take that. Now, can you see any possible issues here? The real Eva Turner.

The real Eva Turner. Or are they going to ask for a bit of entertainment? Yes, exactly. From the real Eva Turner. The real Eva Turner is right behind her. She's behind you. Going, he-ah-em.

So they do, they go, oh, so what an honour to have a famous opera singer on board. Please, would you do us the honour of singing for us? Now, I think you would just say

that you are recovering from something. And my vocal rest. But I also think that she is wild enough to go, all right, I'll give it a crack. What I would do, is I would go full diva because I'm not wrecking my own reputation,

am I? Yeah, that's right. I just feel like, no, how dare you? I am just travelling. Yes. I am on vocal rest. Of course I won't do that. I'll be in my chambers.

Good day. Sure, I've been talking non-stop. Yeah. But this is how I vocal rest. Okay. So, local rest starting now. It's a gentle vocal rest. You were right, Dave.

She spun a great story about having a throat infection. Oh, okay. And the others, then they bought it. They back down. Arriving in Perth, she found the city dull and headed straight back to Melbourne. Oh my God. See, it's such a long trip.

That's such a long trip. What would have been back then? Trains? On the boat? So we've gone all the way around. Holy shit. So probably like a week or something maybe? Yeah.

I have no idea. Two days? Seven weeks. A lot. I think that would take a long time. I think there'd be a few stops. Yeah. Oh yeah, true.

Let's stop along the way. And also boat? Is that the most direct? It was a long time ago, I guess. Sure, now we can fly even that's cumbersome. Honestly, I would have just flown jet so if I was here. Yeah. But that no first class.

No first class. And the time difference is a bit, you know. It really gets here, doesn't it? Yeah, bloody hell. According to Nichols, again using her movie star name, Gloria Gray, she plied her trade in only the bestestestestest. establishments, cashing checks from a bank account she had opened with only one pound and obtaining numerous luxury items. When things got a bit hot in Melbourne, she dyed her hair

a different shade and travelled up to Sydney under the various names of Florence Dunkley, Elizabeth Gardner, Elizabeth Anderson, Elizabeth King, Lady Betty Anderson, Anderson, which is my favourite Anne. Anne Derson. That's so good. Anne Derson. At this point she's begging to be She's mocking them My name is Anne Disson You're okay

Oh my god You look a lot like Lady Betty Anderson No no no I'm Anne Disson People get us confused sometimes No I'm Anne Disson

My surname is Disson But also The list hasn't ended She also went by Florence Disson Gloria Gray and Pamela Pilkington And she took Sydney by storm Passing valueless checks From the city to ride

And the quieter northern beach suburbs All new areas for her So she was being clever in that way She wasn't going back to areas She'd worked in before With other names She even managed to convince one gullible jeweler That she was Mrs Fingleton

The wife of a member of the Australian cricket team He happily gave her a large cameo broached on credit never to see the delightful cricketer's wife or brooch again. Soon she was on the move again, like as she always was, heading south. She stopped by Goldman, which is where Bronn livesy, who suggests this topic's from. That's right. Maybe, I don't know, maybe met a guy and had Bronn's dad or something. Golden, of course, being the future home of the big marino,

which we mentioned so many regularly on this show for some reason. There she was arrested for evading taxi fares. Luckily, she was arrested under the name Gloria Gray, which was a name she hadn't used much in New South Wales, so they didn't realize she had a large criminal history and was granted bail, after which she did a runner back to Melbourne. This is the beauty of all her different names. Every time she's arrested, they're like,

oh, you've got a perfect behavior. Yeah, it's a perfect behavior. Yeah. Yeah, this is my first defence officer. We don't even have any record of you, so you're obviously a model citizen. Yeah, you're all good. Not even a birth certificate. I've never heard of the surname Disson before.

It's beautiful. Beautiful name. For a boy or girl. A boy or girl. Another of her popular aliases at the time was Judith Anderson. The real Judith Anderson was an actor only seven months older than Ethel and was recently working in the UK opposite legendary actor Lawrence Olivier, one of Ethel's favourites. I mean, okay, the small floor in the plan of picking a famous actor is if you're aware of the actors,

you probably are also aware of what they look like, right? Yeah, that's right. And it's, yeah, so it feels like surely you want to have names that aren't memorable as well. Yeah. But I guess if they're fake names doesn't really matter. But yeah, it's strange. As Judith, Ethel stopped in at Aubrey on the Victoria, New South Wales border and cashed a dodgy check for 20 pounds, about a thousand bucks.

with an unsuspecting shopkeeper. She loved the thrill of fooling people and believe that if she did a good enough job, the people she conned would be too embarrassed to tell the police. Days after arriving back in Melbourne, though, Ethel was recognised by a saleswoman who she'd previously conned. The police were notified and Ethel was arrested. According to Nichols,

Ethel was headed back into the court system, this time in Victoria, with 25 different charges of acting under false pretenses against her. It seemed that there are at least 25 people, in Victoria who weren't too embarrassed to tell the police about how they'd been duped. The case was heard in the first week of June 1934. So whatever, she's now 37. Is that right, Dave?

Yeah. She's so young. With Florence Elizabeth Ethel Anderson being charged under the name of Gloria Gray. After laying down the foundations of her story, her lawyer tried to turn the blame onto the shopkeepers, telling the judge that they should expect little sympathy. sympathy from the court. These tradespeople were as much to blame for having given her credit as she was for having passed bad checks. The judge, who somehow also happened to be Ethel's lawyer's father, agreed, saying he never ceased to wonder at the gallability of tradespeople in the city,

who accepted good appearances and manners, and who were ready to give credit and cash checks without first making proper inquiry. He thought they were to blame for their gallability, but qualified this by saying he did not think they should be explored. ETHEL was found guilty of 10 of the original 25 charges and sentenced to six months in Pentridge Prison. No, that's wild. Is that the thing that is allowed where a judge is not, is ruling on it? Surely not, right? No.

But you've still got six months. So Pentridge for people from Manchester, that's our strange ways. Yeah, that's right. Yeah. A few well-known Pentridge inmates from over the years include Ned Kelly. we did a, just did a report on years back, Mark Chopper Reed, Squizzy Taylor and Ronald Ryan. Ryan, do you know their name Ronald Ryan? Yeah, was he the last person?

Yeah, that's right. He was the last, a man executed in Australia. But I didn't realize this. He was hanged in D-D Division of Pentridge. Yeah. On the 3rd of Feb, 1967. So, yeah, I knew he, I knew he was the last go executed, but it feels quite recent. And I didn't realize it happened, you know, like...

Up the road. Five minutes from where we are right now. Yeah. Pretty cool. I know how you love being involved in a story. Every time she comes back to Melbourne, my heart is a flutter. Like, oh, that's where I live. And Pentridge is no longer a prison.

It's now apartments and a shopping centre. They did tour what they were trying to do to the Palais. Yeah. It's funny to be like, oh, this is where people used to get hanged. Anyway, want to see a movie? Yeah, let's go to the cinema. I see a sign like near work every day is like an advertisement for

store your wine in a lovely cell at pantry. They now have the, that's how small the cells were. They're wine cellars now. So you can pay to have your wine stored there. But every time you want a bottle of wine, you have to make the trip down to the prison. Yeah, you've got to sign the papers, get them released.

Pay the bail. What do you call it when a, suburb goes from... Gentrification. I've never heard of a bigger example of gentrification than prison cell to wine cell. Yeah. That's incredible. During her time in Pentridge, Ethel had an altercation with a fellow inmate, which left her with a permanent limp.

Oh, dear. Jess, was that you? Yeah. I shaked her in the hip. She walked in. Get ready, shaken. Get ready shaken. That's what I said.

That's my catchphrase in the prison. Have you seen that movie? Shawshack redemption. Shawshank Redemption. It's a Shawshiv redemption. Yeah, Shawshiv. It's called something like... Anyway, I'm going to stab you now.

Can't remember what it's called. It's pretty good. Pretty good, though. Check it out. Andy Defrein. I love Morgan Freeman. Hello, I'm Jess. Sorry about the Shanking.

If she was around now, they're some of the names she'd be using. I'm Morgan Freeman Yeah Andy DeFrain Shank Freeman Shank Freeman Shank disson

Free men So leaving prison She once again headed for Sydney With the plans of then heading back to England But she was broke So in the following three weeks

She duped three more victims Posing again as nurse Florence Anderson Within days of arriving And telling her war nurse stories She was gone with their cash Oh my God. Once in Sydney, she found the newspapers filled with stories of the Australian cricket team heading over to England for the European summer.

It was the 1934 tour, Don Bradman, and they went over and ended up, spoiler alert, but ended up, the Aussies got it done in the ashes over there. The Aussies, they got it done, they brought it home. They brought it home. Well, I don't know if they were allowing us to bring it home still. It's that weird thing where England was like, no, the trophy's too delicate to travel on your little boat, so we'll keep it here. Did they give you a ribbon or something? They give you a little ribbon, yeah. Oh, that's nice.

I like that. I love a ribbon. Easy to store. Put that in a drawer somewhere if you want. So Ethel read that the team were heading over on a ship called the RMS Orford. She packed herself ready for the trip and boarded the ship without a ticket. Planning just talk her way onto the journey like she had done on the ship to Perth. And this is just because the cricketers are going over.

Yeah. She wanted to go back to England anyway. But this is also like getting in there with the, you know, she's always wanting to be in there with the society set or whatever they used to say. Well, what's her lie? I'm done. Bradman. Hi, Donna Bradman. Call we Donne.

So she bought her the ship and was swiftly ejected. Into the sea? It happened really quickly, like, out of a cannon, into the sea. They put her in a seat and ejected it. All right this way, madam. Undeterred, she jumped on the next ship that was heading. to San Francisco, just another place. She's like, that'll do.

She had a little bit more success, once again posing as the opera singer Turner, but she was found, within a few days, she was found out and turfed from the ship in New Zealand to waiting police officers. As she was being escorted from the ship, she said to the captain, I will not be recommending your ship to my friends.

You don't have any friends. That's a good line. She doesn't have any friends. She only has ex-husbands. The shipping company didn't press charges and she was shipped back to Sydney. That makes it sound like in a packing crate or something. And then when she got off in Sydney, the press were there and she was loving it. They're like, how did you get on and what happened?

How do they treat you? And she was like loving telling her story to the to the journalists, which seems like not clever stuff for someone who's trying to evade being noticed and stuff. You want to have my, do you want my picture taken for the paper? Sure. Show everyone the cornwall. Here's my many names. Next, she went to Brisbane. And then when she arrived, she met Mr. Balfour.

She soon moved in with him and began calling herself Betty Balfour or Lady Betty Balfour. Lady Biddy Balfour. Both of those names were names of real famous people at the time. Unfortunately, Mr. Balfour was a bit of a violent burke. And after he hit her, Ethel decided it was time to move on, taking his checkbook. That one felt pretty good. Reading that one, I'm like, yes, he'll fucking take that checkbook. Fuck that guy.

She headed back to Melbourne. She must be in transit between the eastern capital cities of Australia more than anything else in her life. I think she's been in Melbourne more times than I have. And I was fucking born here. It's beautiful to arrive here back in Melbourne. So when she was in Pentridge, she had a tip that there was this dodgy justice of the piece, if she ever needed forged documents. So she went back down to Melbourne to meet this guy. They weren't able to say his name in the book.

They gave him a pseudonym. So obviously it was... He was dodgy. It was a legit guy and they, for some reason, still unable to say his name. Wow. For a large fee, he organized her a fake birth certificate. so she could apply for a passport and head to England. She now had a new name, Pamela Judith Eve Harvey and a new age, 29.

So she dropped nine years. Nice. Apparently when she, on the next trip, someone was like visibly shocked at her age. She had to laugh at her age. That's brutal. Oh, that, that, oh, that hurts. Yeah, that hurts. 29.

What? What? They gasped. Oh my God, you... Who are you kidding? You are decrepit. Oh, my God, you've lived. Oh, my God, I'm going to get you on a skincare routine.

This is not right. Your face is fucked. Have you heard of sunscreen? Oh, man, I want to put up to say 45. You look terrible. Oh, hey, oh, Merrill, come over here. Look at this freak. You are leather.

Show the passport. Show the passport. Show the passport. I've seen skin, hairless cats that look younger than you. Oh, the wretched. Oh my gosh. Who do you think you're fooling, you stupid woman? Anyway, pleasure to meet you.

Yeah, great to meet you. So she... I'm king of the moon. See how stupid I sound. So as Pamela, Judith Eve, Harvey, and a new age... I literally can't remember her real name. Yeah, Ethel. Ethel. Beavers.

Swindles. Of course. Swindles. So she, um... She was ready. to head back to England. Apart from the fact, she didn't have enough money to travel their first class. So if she didn't have enough money to travel their first class.

Great. So you just go third class is what you can afford. It's the honest way. No, instead she went to New Zealand. Oh, okay. Which is where she could go first class. According to Nichols, on the ship to Wellington, Ethel befriended Mr and Mrs. McTaggett.

McTaget formally introduced Ethel to the guest speaker, Mr. William Corradine. At 55, he was 16 years older than Ethel, and 25 years older than her alias. Eve. A single civil engineer, he had recently sold his share of a Ceylon tea plantation and was heading back to Britain to undertake some consultative work at Whitehall before officially retiring.

What kind of work? Consultative? Oh, that's just fun to listen to. Yeah. How would a normal person say that? No, I think that's right. It was a joy. Consultative.

It feels like I added a syllable. Yeah, it can't be right. Maybe some consulting work. Yeah. Nah, consultative. Look, I'm quoting direct from Nichols here Dave, have a go. Try saying it though.

Consultative. How fun was that? It is fun to say. And I must say, Nichols does like to add a little bit of flair to stories, words. I love it. Yes. I love it too. Big fan of Nichols.

Holy shit. What a story. I want to read this book now and I know everything. Yeah. You know? It was, I've been listening to it in the day and then listening to it at night. Sort of catch it. I'll listen to it at night and fall a side.

sleep so I'm like, all right, I'm going to have to read that to catch it up. But, um, uh, so, yeah, so he, he was undertaking some consultative work before retiring. Uh, to Ethel, Mr. William Alexander Corridine was too good an opportunity to miss. Of course. Once again, Ethel had a change, once again, Ethel had a chance at a life free from deception, relatively speaking anyway. she was still light about nearly everything she told him her father had been a doctor at harley street

but had died two years before she embarked on a world trip and she had nursed him through a long horrible illness her mother a member of the Coates cotton dynasty same still cotton just a different family a more famous one I guess had also died when she was quite young so they had something in common she had never married or had any children all of that lies That's, fuck it.

I mean, she's married so many times and she's dumped a couple. She's dumped to three children. Yeah. And those two just taken by child services, it seems like she never looked into what happened to all. Why take what? Yeah. Yeah, they were probably better just being left at the orphanage, maybe. Yeah.

Why did you have to steal them from the orphanage and then just abandon them? So, yeah, it's also, it's so much information in this new relationship she's about to have. Did she have to remember? Yeah, it's exhausting. She told him she was keen to head back to England and settled down with him if he was interested. Nichols continues. Mr. Corradine was delighted.

And on the 27th of February, 1935, they were married at his uncle's parish church in Rotorua. With a fresh marriage certificate, Eve Corradine, Nehavi, applied for a new passport for a new life. They set off for England and Ethel was content. She was invited to all the best Chelsea. social occasions, had a rich, respectable husband, a beautiful home, she could entertain him freely, and then life took an unexpected turn. At nearly 40 years of age, although her husband thought

she was about 31, Ethel found out that she was pregnant. William was ecstatic. He was going to be a father. Ethel was not nearly as excited. Ethel Mary Corridine arrived on the 22nd of September 1936, but sadly died only a few weeks later. Mr. Corradine was heartbroken. Filled with grief, his health and spirits deteriorated, and he officially retired. Ethel wanted to sell the house, saying it was filled with sad memories, and that they should move somewhere more gay and start again. But all William wanted to do was stay indoors and mourn. So Ethel took off to the French Riviera.

She'd always wanted to live in the playground of the rich and famous that she'd seen again and again portrayed on film. So she left him there to mourn, she went to party. She parted in the casinos of Monte Carlo and Nice She wanted to be noticed and accepted into the scene But she struggled to make an impression Even with her storytelling Which was everywhere else was very good

But there she felt like a small dull fish In a very big pond Instead of becoming a mover and a shaker in the Riviera All she succeeded in doing Was gambling away all the money Her husband had given her for the trip After her third request for extra funds in a month Her husband asked her to return home

But unbeknownst to him she didn't even have enough money to travel back. Despite trying her normal cons, the people of Nice found her employees transparent. They're like, We know what you're doing. Yeah, if you're not going to pay up front, fuck off. Yeah.

Luckily, she was able to spin a tail to her hotel manager who lent her enough money to make it back to England. But instead of heading home, Ethel went back to Blackpool, whereas scams worked once more, restoring her faith. that she hadn't lost her touch. Oh my God.

Did she, so someone said, I'm Mary, she goes, I'm back, baby! Woo! Okay, that's a weird response. She successfully hoodwinked people out of goods and services around the country. So she started traveling around hoodwinking again and conning. Just leaving her husband mourning in their house. That's so... It's awful.

Until in early July 1938, when she was once again busing, this time for using worthless checks. She thought she'd get away with a slap on the wrist, but unfortunately, Ethel was sentenced to more time in prison. Twenty years after first spending time in jail, she was back in the big house again. By this point, she'd been officially married eight times, divorced three times,

and she decided to write to her husband, Mr. Corridine, and come clean, at least about her gambling and where she was now, and apologising for not coming home, hoping that he would forgive her. Corrudeen went straight to visit her, in prison, racked with guilt for not sending her more money and blaming himself for her being in jail.

He promised to make it up to her. Oh, Mr. Corridine! He sounds nice. He is nice. Together, they bought a home in Blackpool and at Ethel's request set her up with a business, a stall selling artificial flowers to tourists. She's like, I wanted someone to keep me busy. I want a business.

So, yeah, she became a flower merchant. So was Ethel finally ready to settle down for real? No. In the summer of 1942, she met a man named Thomas Liverthy. I don't know if that name rings a bell. No. There's been so many fucking names. Ethel soon asked a wealthy businessman to the movies.

From then on, they met regularly. Ethel felt she had her next husband lined up. Oh, my God. About Mr. Corridine. Horridine. Well, yeah. This is, so she had him lined up despite the fact that both she and he were married to other people. Scandalous stuff.

Livesee was loaded. He'd inherited a family fortune worth more than $7 million in today's money. Ethel told him she was only still with Mr. Corridine out of loyalty as his health was now steadily failing. And it started failing since the death of his daughter. And it sort of, yeah, it seemed like he was dying. Soon Ethel and Liversie were going on romantic trips together to the Isle of Man. In 1943, they stayed at a hotel owned by Ellen and Leo Kane. Sounds like landlords.

Yeah. Well, that's the business. Nosey landlords. Yeah, that's right. She's about to become the things she hated the most. Ethel set up a meeting with Ellen with the hopes of buying one of the hotels. Ellen was uncomfortable when Mr. Liversie came to the meeting as well. According to Nichols, Cainey pulled herself upright.

and looked at the pair through her spectacles. I had not realized you're in business together, she remarked. Ethel smiled gently. We are to be married, Mrs. Kane. But you're already married, are you not? She asked Mrs. Liversey and Mr. Livesey. Both of you, do different people, she added, looking between the two. Oh, no need to bother yourself, Mrs. Kane, Ethel assured her.

Mr. Livesey here is seeking a divorce and my husband is ill. He won't be with us for much longer. That's the, I guess, the imagined conversation. by Nichols. So why are you being so nosy, Mrs. Kane? Yeah. My husband's practically dead. He's back at home alone, dying, very unwell.

So, maybe. Because our daughter died. So he'll be dead in no time. And I won't be there by his side. So I'll be well and truly ready to marry. What's your name again? This guy. This guy.

Bozo over here. This guy. Moneybags McGee. whatever. Marry this guy, cash or whatever. Yeah. So are you selling me a hotel or what? Well, Ellen was horrified with this idea that these two married people were planning to get married.

Enough to tell them they could no longer stay at her hotel. Good. But not enough to reject their offer. I'll take your money. Unless you buy the hotel. It was decided. Ethel and Liversey would be moving to the Isle of Man. This is all happening while Corridine's

Corridine My heart bleeds for you So Ethel went back By Coridine's bed Until he did die So the last little period She apparently she stayed by his bedside Oh I take it all back then

Stayed by his bedside with a pillow over his face Slowly Mushed into his nose She was so excited every time he was quiet She was like fine And then he'd take a breath she'd be like, fuck. Still alive.

On Friday the 15th of October, 1943, passed peacefully away. Well, that's what we think. But maybe you've just cast a spurs. He was murdered. Peacefully. Peacefully. He was murdered peacefully in his sleep.

What a way to go. It says that on his grave. Murdered peacefully in his sleep. Ethel then sold off their house and all their household contents withdrew all the money from her late husband's estate and caught the plane to the Isle of Man. She lived with Livesey at the hotel for a while before moving to a stately home called

Ivy Dean. Though Livesey still wasn't divorced, Ethel told others they were married, including her father who she'd contacted for the first time in years. Her dad had tried unsuccessfully for years to get in touch with her and his grandsons in Australia. The last he'd heard from her, she was Mrs. Anderson living in South Australia with her sons, and then they disappeared. This is quite a while earlier.

The two that you're real, well, I really felt for reading this story were Corridine and her dad. Yeah. I mean, there's heaps of. So many. Heaps of people to feel for, but yeah, for some reason those two stood out. And they were the boys. Her, so yeah, he finally got back in contact with her. And Ethel wrote a long letter from her new home at Ivy Dean,

apologising for the gap in communication saying she had simply been too busy. She caught him up on what she'd been up to though. When I say he got in contact with her, she got in contact with him. I'm sorry, I've been far too busy. Anyway, don't know where the kids are. No, she told him they were in at Geelong Grammar,

which is a lie. Which is like a very prestigious school. Yeah. Pretty expensive. Yeah, that's right. boarding school. What, she's trying to be like, they're great.

Well, because he'd been. sending her a lot of cash, he'd be like, assume that money that I'm sending to look after the kids. I don't worry, they're in the most expensive school in the country. He'd be like, okay. Wonderful. Can I contact them? No.

Absolutely not. Please don't. They won't remember you. I'd change their names. You can contact them, but they've got different names there. I won't tell you what those names are. No, but they'll know. If you say, a couple of brothers, yeah, that's them.

Whoever they say. They're really good like that. Gordon and Nichols, the return letter was filled with a father's love and concern. He was delighted she was well and living so close compared to Australia and hoped his grandsons were doing well. He had sad news though. Her eldest son Frank Carter had been killed in the ongoing war and her mother had passed

away just months before and he was in the process of selling their family home. The news of her sons and her mother's deaths did not overly sad and Ethel, but she did miss her father. Perhaps he would like to join them on the Isle of Man, he suggested. Oh, she suggested, sorry. Is she the worst person you've ever heard of? I think maybe, yeah. I'm not that saddened by the death of my son.

Well, I mean, this is according to Nichols. She didn't, I don't know exactly know how she gleaned that information. I mean, this is a kid she abandoned from days old. So I'm going to say she wasn't all that moved. So March of 1944, Ethel's father moved to the Isle of Man, showing him her life there. He was pleased she was so happy and successful. It sounded like he was a proud dad.

Despite everything. Dad. But if you've brought Dad along now, how are you going to fuck off suddenly? Because she's going to. She doesn't give a shit about anyone except herself. Oh, she'll ruin this. She'll abandon Dad. He's moved there.

Sporatically, she feels bad. She misses her dad. So I guess she's like, I want to be with my dad. And then she's not, yeah, she's not really thinking about how he feels in the large gaps in between. Yeah. Because she's very busy, though. That's right. She's very busy.

very busy. That was one of her names at one point. Bizzle busily. Hi, Ethel Bissaly. According to Nichols, both she and Mr. Liversy noticed that he had become a bit fuddled. And on Mr. Liversy's advice, Ethel suggested to her father that Mr. Liversy become his power of attorney and manage his affairs and all the paperwork involved with selling his home and two other properties in Manchester.

Mr. Swindell's agreed and signed everything over to his new son-in-law. The only cloud in Ethel's sunny sky was the fact that Thomas Livesey's wife refused to give him a divorce and was threatening to take him for everything he owned. In the meantime... And they've just handed that man control...

Of her father's. Hey, so my sort of partner I live with is about to get sued for everything he owns. Also, Dad, can you hand over what you own to him? He doesn't seem that smart. But they think this through, sort of. In the meantime, Ethel changed her name by deed pole to Florence Elizabeth Ethel Liversie.

Hang on, what if she just changed her name to his wife's name? Oh yeah. Then no need to file for anything. Now you're two steps ahead. And then quietly get her drunk and make her change her name by deed poll to some other bullshit. Yeah. One of her many bullshit. Maybe Ann Dyson.

Yeah, she can have Anderson. That's yours now. You're welcome. I gave you the best one. Yeah, that is easy. I came out without myself. You could have been Daphne, but I gave you Ann Dyson. Could have been Daph Dinderson, but I gave you Anderson.

Sorry, Ann Desson. Listen, I beg your fun, I didn't pause. So, yeah, so she's changed her name by Dede Pohl. This is back to Nichols. This was the first stage in their plan to protect Mr. Liversie's assets from his wife and children. And by the end of the month, all of his assets, including five investment properties, worth over nearly half a million in today's cash, which is funny because the same land would be worth like a trillion dollars.

But somehow property prices have gone up faster than money prices. I'm not an economist. I'm sorry if I said it wrong. No, I think that was right. Sounds right to me. So she had control of all this, and this was to keep it away from his wife who wanted to get it. In the meantime, Ethel was living it up, partying, traveling and shopping.

In less than six months, she managed to spend more than 6,000 pounds over $380,000. Jesus. Just partying, traveling, shopping. Great. So, hey, your wife's about to get what she deserves from you and give it to me and I'll spend it all. Yeah. Yeah, she's like, no matter how, whatever the amount of money is coming in, she always finds a way to spend more than that. Amongst her partying, she met a movie maker from the Pinewood Studios.

She was starstruck when she found out she was in the biz. He was in the biz. She loved the cinema. They talked about his latest script idea and how there was trouble with raising funds for the film. So Ethel said, look, I'd love to be involved. I'll help you out. I'll raise the money. To raise the money, they sold one of her father's properties at a bargain price. But instead of passing the money onto the movie maker. As soon as the money hit their account, Ethel started spending it on other things. She was living it up and spending it up, but despite now being loaded, she was still spending more than she could afford. The movie producer returned to the aisle and was drunk at a dinner party a month or so later, and he was upset that Ethel never came through with the movie money,

and he told everyone in their social circle that he doubted Mrs. Liversey could lie straight and bed, saying he thought she was suffering from delusions of grandeur. She suffers the same maladies as Adolf Hitler, he declared. Oh. I mean, I don't like this woman. But are we going straight to Hitler comparisons? That's a bit of a... That's a stretch.

He's a bit of a leap there. He's killing a lot of people. Maybe, I don't know, Dave, is this before Hitler was that bad? What I... We're in World War II, God damn it! No, I think he was already that. bad. He was saying, Adolf Fittler, you know, the student artist

Yeah. Have you seen his watercolors? They're fucking horrific. And she's worse than that. She's worse than that. Her watercolors are all right. I've muddled my metaphor a bit here. I'm quite drunk. She's a liar and I'm drunk. She's a liar.

For new listeners, when I said to ask Dave if this was before it was that bad. That was you saying that. I was referencing when Dave was going to He suggested that... ...years down Matt's microphone here. Years ago.

And, yeah, for quite a while after that, we called him a Nazi. Not sure why you have to bring this up again. I request this to be... Yeah, we've been going for two hours and 20 minutes. We don't have time for this. I request this to be struck from the record, thank you. So, yeah, so he's drunk this guy, this movie... Movie producer, who we don't even know his name.

He's going around, going... She's no good. She can't lie straight in bed. Is he gone back to the Isle of Man, Justice besmirch her name? I think he was already... Kind of in that scene, but yeah, at a dinner party, things got out of hand, and he got a little loose-lipped. I don't get, she can't lie straight in bed. Yeah.

I don't get that. Yeah, what does that mean? It means she can't tell the truth, but. Can't lie straight in bed. She can't. Yeah, wouldn't it be she can't, she can lie? Yeah. It's too late.

I don't get it. It's too late for these questions. It's after midnight, Jess. Did you realize that? Yeah. realize. Hey, we're on the home stretch. Don't worry.

We're coming home strong here. How many more lives could she possibly ruin? Oh, she'll find a way. They've, can you... She's ruined mine. Can you explain the can't lie straight in bed. Is that the saying? It is a saying.

I've never questioned it before. Me either. I've understood what they're trying to get across. I just don't get it. But when you talk about them lying straight in bed... They can't lie straight in bed. Are you supposed to just lie, like, completely straight in bed? I think just, yeah, talking straight, but they're saying, but the lie part is what confuses it.

Yeah. Is it lying down or is it lying like not telling the truth? Oh, it's some sort of paradox of a saying. Yeah, you can't truth straight in bed. That doesn't make sense either. I look forward to the tweets explaining this. I don't. I genuinely do.

I won't know what you're talking about though. We are recording this ahead of time. I will have no idea, but I'll enjoy it. Start it with, by the way, if you want to know. Provide the phrase last. You know what? Don't tweet me because I'll probably, I'll Google it just after we finish. Yeah, we'll figure it out.

So, Ethel stormed out. She's been besmirched at this dinner party. She storms right out of there, leaving her sort of husband, liversie behind to make apologies for the both of them. The next day, the producer offered an unreserved apology after she threatened to sue for libel by her lawyer. Ethel was ready to flee again. Getting ready to leave,

she came across her dad and told him she was leaving to see her boys back in Australia who were studying, of course, at Geelong Grandma. Oh my God, her dad's just like, I'm so happy to hear that. Yeah. Though in truth, she had no idea where they were. On top of having Livesey's fortune in her name,

in preparing to leave, she also cleaned out most of her father's money to take with her. Oh, you piece of shit. Leaving just enough to cover his nursing costs. Don't look at me like that makes it better. It makes it slightly better. She's awful. He's done nothing but be way too kind to her.

As she's just been a complete piece of shit. Real burke. And you know what? He's been a bit blinded by a father's love. But I hope if I'm ever a father that I'll be able to see through that kid's bullshit. Yeah. Well, listen to your wife or your partner because she seemed to be on the right. The mum was like, this is, this is crack.

She's like, this is bullshit. I'm not taking a word. She was calling it out right from the start. Yes. And that's why I guess she really, she didn't care when she died. Yeah. Ugh. So she took most of her dad's cash as well as her sort of husband's stuff and money and properties and everything.

It were in her name. And she flew to London. leaving Livesey with the last six months of creditors to contend with and no ability to pay them. So she'd been racking up bills and she took all the money that would have become. Does something awful happen to her? You really, you want something bad? You know, a bit of poetic justice at the end of this or something.

Yeah, I don't want her to die of old age just inner sleep peacefully. I wanted to get hit by a bus or something. One of those double-decal under ones. No. Yeah, that's right. Strange ways, here she comes. In London, Ethel went to Australia's High Commission to apply for a visa. As part of the deal to not sue, the movie producer also agreed to pose as a solicitor to sponsor her application,

as well as back her story that she needed to go to Australia on sympathetic grounds. The deal was, if he helped her get out of the country immediately, she would not sue. So she'd convinced him of this thing that, surely, how likely is it that she could sue him from, from drunkenly saying some things at a party. That seems pretty unlikely, but I also didn't think you could get your landlady. That's true. To get you to go to jail for lying to them.

They fibbed to me. They fibbed to me. Now lock them up. Ten years hard labour. You are charged with fibbing. What are you in for? Fibbing. What are you in for?

Murder. Oh, okay. Triple murder. You're on the same cell block. Oh, this doesn't feel entirely fair. Ethel then paid 10 grand in today's money for first class tickets to Australia, obviously using her father slash partners cash. When the ship docked in South Australia,

Ethel tracked down the two sons. She had left behind 12 years before. It's a long time in between. She found Basil. How many cruscets had you left them? Three boxes. They were almost on the last crumb. Oh, just in time.

Man, you've made me crave crosskets. I haven't had crowskets of fucking easy. It's so long. So she found Basil, who welcomed her back into his life with open arms. Basil! Basil, I love you, Basil. He was 19 and in search of a job at the time. And his mum's like, I got heaps of cash.

I'm going to buy you a news agency to run. So she bought him a news agency and he just started running the news agency. Great. And is he now Kerry Packer? Yes. My husband. Frank, on the other hand, was harder to find. It later turned out he was living on the open road

Working the outback, taking jobs wherever he could Ethel then moved to Sydney Where she worked her way into high society With tall tales from her past She told stories with bits of truth in them Telling her new wealthy friends That her husband James Liversey died in the war Even though his name was Thomas

And he was still alive So it's such a weird, like slight changes of stories Yeah, so hard to keep track of She told them she entertained the Duke of Windsor on her yacht on the French Riviera, the truth was she saw him briefly from a distance. So there was little hints of truth. I once had a postcard with his face on it.

I've read that name before. That's it. So yeah, little elements of truth and that person existed, yeah. But the best lies have elements of truth. That's right. That's right. I saw him once.

on my yacht. That's so funny. According to Nichols, Ethel's tales became even larger than life at each subsequent event she attended. She was to host and be seen at dinner parties, garden parties, bridge nights and charity balls, where she happily made large donations to all of her friends' charities and repeated her fantastic stories of great wealth with flair. Ethel was in the society to which she felt she truly belonged. She had money to burn and she was on a role. And now we're getting back to where we began

The wedding event of the year But to whom? Well, soon after arriving in Sydney Ethel was introduced to a civil servant By the name of Rex Beach Who was... That's right! Rex!

Who was from a fairly well-off family back in England. What's Rex short for? Rexinald. Thank you. I've always wondered. My childhood doctor was Rex. And it's a... Is it T-Rex?

T-Rex? It's short for Tyrannosaurus. Yeah. Apparently, according to AlexaAnsors.amazon.com. Reginald, Rexford and Regis. Reginald. Rexford does make a bit more sense, doesn't it? Regis.

Regis gets called Rex. Reginald makes more sense initially than like Jack to John or something. Totally, yeah. Even though I watched a TikTok recently explaining that. Oh yeah. It's this long convoluted story. that they would Yeah, anyway, whatever

There's a reason why Jack is John Would you believe it? There's a reason for it We'll do a report on it one day So Rex, Beach and Ethel Was a bit of love at first sight Oh, you don't say

Maybe at least for Rex. Finally her soulmate. Yeah, finally. She can settle down. How old is she now, 86? No, what is it? It's 45, so what's that? But her passport says she's 17.

Yes. Oh my God, you are horrific. What have you got in some sort of condition? Oh my God, why are you aging so fast? Are you Benjamin Button? Are you fucked in the face? You got a face like a dropped pie. That's gone moldy.

Oh, my God. Oh, okay. Yeah, it's no good. You can't eat it. Blue cheese? No, moldy blue. Just mold. Oh.

So very soon after meeting, they're engaged. And with all. her cash, Ethel wanted to make a big splash with an extravagant wedding. Her wedding ring was being especially designed and contained another 32 diamonds. She also had an extravagant wedding dress made by Edward Molyneux, designer to the stars and creator of royal wedding gowns and was having it flown in from his studio in Paris. Flowers were being specifically grown in a hot house outside of Sydney for a bridal bouquet as well as bouquets for her four bridesmaids. They were, how does she have bridesmaids?

I said the wrong word. I said specifically, especially. Especially grown. Yeah, but that's still ridiculous. They were also specifically grown for her, I guess. I think both true. They're just also special. Yeah, I wasn't pulling you up on that at all.

Jess, look, I think it was still technically okay. What I was baffled by wasn't especially or specifically the flowers. It was that she had four bridesmaids. Yes. How does she have any friends? They're all from this group that she's just met in Sydney. Oh my. Including her assistant, I believe.

And does that not ring any bells for people? Yeah, but you're like, oh, well, everyone close to me died on the war, I guess, or they're so far away. I want to start a new life here. Fuck, how good to just be able to blame the war for everything. She's now got two wars to blame. Yeah. God, that must have been nice. How lucky to have lived through two world wars.

I've got nothing to blame for the fact that I don't have any friends. Oh, come on. What? This is a pandemic. True. Me? I lived through that. Nice.

No bride's mates. She organised doves to be released as the bride and groom emerged and the wedding service itself would feature a full choral choir. I'm saying that right? Quarrel, coral. Coral. Full choral ceremony with Australian soprano Miss Jean Hatton

and world-renowned Australian floutist Neville Amadio performing. How amazing. She's previously claimed to be both of those. people. Now they're performing at her wedding. But unfortunately, she had misplaced her flute, so I could not play. Sorry. The Australia Hotel was booked for the reception with an unlimited supply of the best French champagne,

an enormous four-tiered wedding cake topped with another elaborate floral arrangement, was to be the centrepiece of an extravagant buffet. I mean, this is not only her biggest wedding, but probably her, like, first one, even though this has brought husband number 10 or something, where there's any kind of ceremony or a party, right? Like the other... I think she had one, I think, that was pretty big in a church. Maybe a couple.

Yeah, okay. And one of those she left straight after as well. Isn't that wild? Do you think, yeah, the ones that she's fleeing from straight away. But one of them was in a church and stuff and she fled. Oh, my God. Another one, I think the Giblets, I think, might have been in a church. Right.

And actually, yeah, maybe a few of them, but this is the... This one, she's going all out. This is huge, yeah. This one, she's playing the rich person. Yeah. Normally she's sort of, no, maybe she's, she's normally some sort of an equal partner. She's always saying she's a bit rich and she's marrying a rich person as well.

So, yeah, so it was all stuff that, like, hasn't been since the war, you know, everything was, you know, rations and all this sort of stuff. So it was a real big deal coming out of the war. Do you know her son seeing this being like, you bought me in news agents? I mean, couldn't you bought me like an oil company or something? you are so rich. So rich. The tabloids got a whiff of the wedding,

which was being touted as the Society wedding of the year. And just before the wedding, the week before, Ethel was interviewed by the Daily Mirror. Ethel proudly showed off an engagement present she received from her friend Dr. Cunningham. A puppy, she named Tingling. When the reporter suggested it was an unusual gift, Ethel disagreed saying,

Not at all. He knew I used to own this wonderful breed back in England before the war. I was once offered 3,000 guineas for my best stud dog, but he refused, of course. But I refused of course. The dog said, that's not enough for me. No, thank you. 3,000 guineas. We're at a zero and we might be able to talk.

Woof, woof. I'm trying to figure out what 3,000 guineas was, but I think it's like a fuckload of money. Yeah, right. But I couldn't really cook. But she's just talking absolute shit there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's just a riff.

She just does not care at all. She again told her imaginary backstory with a few details tweaked here and there. She was then asked about her fiancé and even added a fib to his story saying he was at the Anzac Landing, which he wasn't. He read that in the paper was like, why did you say that? That's weird. She's like, oh, sorry, I got confused. I thought you were. Sorry, one of my husbands was.

I thought you read that famous thing. I don't know you that well. Yeah, we met three weeks ago. I just fill in the details with things that I like. Your favourite colour is brown. Brown! Of all of them. I like brown.

No one likes brown. It's chocolate. It's coffee. It's dirt. It's all the three, the big ones. It's shit. The big four. Is that what colours me to be?

Yeah. I wouldn't know. Gentleman never shits, but I'm surprised, never seen one. The only ones I've ever seen are those white dog ones. Yeah. That's sort of crumble when you pick them up. That's right. Stop picking.

You thought all boom was white and crumbly. Another one going through the fingers. Never get one back to the lab. I don't know what experiments I'm doing, but... It's getting so late. It's so fucking late. We haven't done this for a while. Yeah, we know what we've been recording here in the days and we're,

and this is the longest report I've ever written. But we are coming to the end of it. How long into we are, Dave? Over two and a half. Crocky. It's great story though. Holy shit. I'm loving it.

How's it going to end? I'm having such a good time. I'm just tired and need to pee. I'm thinking a bus into the chapel, hitting her on at the front, maybe. I think all of her husbands appear and they all get a bat. It's Poirot style. That famous one won't say which one, where everyone gets a shot. So, leading up to the event, a few days before, a social card playing.

night was held hosted by lawyer and ex-politician Mac MacDonald Ethel was dominating the games winning hand after hand Mac noticed that she was going to a handbag each round What do you call it?

It's not a round, is it? Each hand. Yeah, each hand she was going into her handbag. Each hand bag makes sense. Makes sense. He couldn't be 100% sure but he had a funny feeling she was cheating. In fact, he was quite sure she was cheating

but he thought to himself, why would a woman of her standing sink so low? It didn't make any sense. Anyway, a few days later, it's time for the big day. Or as we already know, the big wedding day that wasn't. While Livesey and her bridesmaids were readying themselves for the event, there was a knock at the door. It was Mac Mac MacDonald and groomed to be Rex Beach.

Mac McDonald. Mac Mac McDonald. And Rex Beach. Fuck it out. She made up the other people's names in her life as well. Your name is now Rex Beach. Nice to meet you, Rex Beach. Mack was so suss on Ethel's card playing that he investigated her history.

Rex, Mac and Ethel went into another room and Mac listed everything he found out. All the marriages, the bigamy, the outstanding fraud charges, all the inconsistencies between her stories and what he'd found out. Geez, what a journalist. What an investigator. Yeah. Because he was a lawyer. He went on to, he was in politics later. So he had connections, I guess.

Database, just got on the World Wide Web. Yeah, and this is all within... Oh, onto the internet movie database. Yeah, just gave her Google. And this is all within a few days. So we figured it out pretty quickly. That's a kind of friend you need, because that's going to save Rex a lot of embarrassment.

Yes, and cash. And cash. Ethel pleaded with Rex to let her explain, but the wedding was off. Max is like, I'm telling you... Don't do it. Don't do this. We've got a bail.

On the Monday morning, so you gave her a couple of days, Mack went to the police to let them know what he'd found out. Later that morning, two police officers arrived at Ethel's apartment, but they found only her personal assistant, Joyce Dick, who had been working for Ethel since she moved to Sydney earlier that year. Joyce Dick. That's fake. Joystick.

Joystick. Joystick. Joystick. Yeah. The police asked Dick, the police asked Joyce Dick, what she knew about Ethel. and Dick replied that she knew a lot less than she thought... Well, the control of my mouth then.

She knew a lot less than she thought. Everything she thought she knew was a lie. She'd been fooled as well. In the end, I guess she knew Dick. Ethel had vanished. They discovered she'd been driven to a train station south of Sydney. She'd probably fucking married someone in the train station. Was she tied to the tracks?

That would be all right. I'd be happy with that. telling her driver that she was going to Melbourne. Sydney police continued to search for her. An arrest warrant arrived from South Australia for Mrs. Florence, Elizabeth Ethel Liversie, alias Gardner, alias Anderson, alias Stevens, alias Lockwood, alias Pamela and Pilkington, alias Gloria Gray. Andeson.

They went, that's so stupid to leave it off. Leave that one off. That's embarrassing. The warrant was for the 12-year-old charge of fraud. So one of the ones she bailed on it at the court. Mr. Liversie back in England had also sent his attorney out to Australia to try and get his money back. Police followed up reports of sightings of Ethel

in Tasmania, Melbourne, Sydney and Brisbane. There were many tip-offs. Some of them were pretty unlikely, like being seen walking down a busy Sydney street and broad daylight. Apparently, because it was a big news in the papers as well, so obviously she's not walking down main streets, but there was a better lead in Brisbane

based on her buying a train ticket from Brisbane to North Queensland, but when the police arrived at the station, she wasn't on the train. It seems like she'd bought a ticket as a decoy. Oh, wow. Journalists in Australia and the UK were interviewing all sorts of related people as the story was blowing up. Someone from London's Daily Mail tracked down Ethel's dad on the Isle of Man, explaining to him the story.

Oh, no. That feels so bad for him. Heartbroken with what he learned, he replied, before she left, she told me she was returning shortly. He then stared out the window and didn't comment. further. Oh, dad. My heart is broken. That is awful. What a sweet man. He was just like, oh good, she's going to go get my

grandchildren. I'll finally meet them. And now he's finding out, oh, she's been married a lot and we don't know anything about any children. She's never with any children. Oh, that's awful. Two weeks after her disappearance, the police received an annum. Two weeks after her disappearance, the police received an annulment. Two weeks after her disappearance, the police received an anonymous tip off after appealing to the public via the press. The tip suggested that she was hiding out in a boarding house in Chester Hill, 15 miles west of Sydney. Having followed up many dead ends, the police was shocked to find Ethel at the boarding house. After taking some time to dress up, she went with the police without a fuss.

According to Nichols, when the police officer was about to let her know why she was being arrested, Ethel replied, I know, detective, it's been in all the papers. God, she sucks. Tell me something I don't know. I feel like she's going to get away with it. It turns out after she had the driver take her to the train station south of Sydney, telling him she was heading for Melbourne, she actually caught a train straight back to Sydney.

And the siding of her in downtown Sydney was a genuine siding. She was in town sorting out some lawyers for her inevitable court case. As it turned out, it was Ethel who would anonymously rang the police with her location, as Nichols wrote. sick of being on the run she wanted to clear the air tell her side of the story get her life back

her lawyers had assured her that if she faced up to the charges she'd more than likely get off the minor fraud charge and she was now ready that's a good twist yeah leading up to the trial

ethel's lawyer organized her an interview with the truth newspaper in which she said the only person I've ever heard is myself no that is because woman like

I've been too trusting and generous Oh my God Whoa The only person I've hurt is myself My biggest crime is carrying too much I love too much And too easily Guilty as charged

I guess I just have bad taste in men And my children are men And they're bad And fuck you Billy Fuck you Billy You dog you started all As I love you Billy The trial was

massive news crowds gathered outside every day and opinion was divided as to ethel's innocence it was in all the papers but it was just like it was it was it was a what do you get something like it's a big real big thing yeah oh yeah couldn't have said about myself mean like it was it was what do you call it when a news story goes real big it's big yes thank you at the end of the trial i'm i'm starting up i got to this point and in the, where in the book, there's still, like I say, read the book, because I'm only telling a sliver of it. I didn't, the second half.

Which is crazy. Yeah, yeah. Well. Because we're at nearly three hours. Anyway. This is a sliver. I'm going through some parts briefly here. At the end of the trial, the jury found Ethel guilty on both counts of fraud.

And despite the judge not really being sure what to make of Ethel, he ended up not giving her any jail time. Instead, just a 300 pound bond. It seems a lot of the rest of her life, Ethel spent in courtrooms. She sued multiple parties, including her lawyers, and even her ex-fiancee Rex Beach. Why? Because he... He's just another Billy.

He was going... I think it was because he didn't go through the wedding, maybe. And she was left with some of the costs. How her life ended seems to have... been hit by a bus. No, sorry, no, I've misread that. No, it's some sort of a mystery. Oh, choose her and death.

Oh, yeah, that's true, actually. Yeah, then we can choose. In the 1980s, her son, Frank, who he didn't have... Frank the second. Frank the second, who didn't really rate his mum. Basil was pretty open to her coming. Frank has never really forgave her for how he was treated. That's fair.

but he was looking for his birth certificate and thought if he'd track down his mum she might have it he's like she'd be very old now but if I find her maybe she'll still have it but according to Nichols a death notice appeared in the south Australian advertiser stating that mrs. Florence Ethel Livesey had passed away in the small country town of Claire South Australia in March 1953 so that was that. 1953 was gone at the age of 55 or was she? after ordering the death certificate, it showed the death of an 87-year-old woman who had died from gangrene in her left leg. Like, that doesn't seem right.

Strangely enough, there were newspaper reports about a woman looking uncannily like her 18 months after she'd been released from Adelaide Jail. She was being sought for three counts of false pretenses in Western Australia. This large middle-aged woman had a nice little scheme happening where she'd say she was going to buy a house, then get the keys from the owner or a state agent without even paying a deposit, then show the house to young couples, offering it at a greatly reduced price, and would then pocket their cash deposits before disappearing. Could this have been Ethel? Sounds like it's possible, but we'll probably never know for sure.

It's unknown. That death certificate, the age really didn't add up at all, unless she'd changed it from minus nine to plus. Yeah. Of all the victims she left in her wake, some recovered better than others, and some have their fates unknown. There was a bunch of her ex-husbands and stuff where Nichols wasn't quite able to track down. Some of the ones she did track down.

Thomas Livesey bought back his two properties from Ethel's bankrupt estate for 150 pounds and probably disappeared off the radar. A darn sight poorer than when he first met the charming Mrs. Ethel, Oridine. So he luckily got a couple of his properties back, which means he was probably doing all right. She was bankrupt, so there was another big court case and she owed a lot of people money, but was bankrupt, which was very embarrassing. Oh, it is embarrassing.

You can't travel first class and you're bankrupt. That's right. Ethel's son Basil continued to run his news agency until he retired. That's the coolest thing in the whole story. Yeah. It's the only thing she bought that actually lasted. Yeah. Yeah, great.

The only thing she did for anybody else. And his brother Frank George Anderson was married with five children. Get this. All named Frank. Married with five children when he met the love of his life, June Boland. She was a widow with four small children of her own. They raised the nine children together, determined not to let their combined brood be torn asunder, and together had another five children.

No. I don't know if there's any questions. come off the back of that, 14 child family? I guess my only question is, do they know what's causing them? Yeah, fantastic question. But he was already married and then met someone else. Yeah, it was like the apple doesn't fall from the tree sort of stuff there. 14 children.

And is one of them the grandchild of the book? Yeah, I guess so. Finally, like, so, yeah, most of the ex-husbands were left way worse off, obviously. many of them never recovered any of their money that she stole. But lastly, maybe most importantly for the dog lovers out there, tingling the dog led out his days in the care of May and Mack McDonald. With the happy life and full life. Tingling.

Tingling. Do they rename the dog? Oh, surely. Because they hate it. Like all those people, they really couldn't stand her after the hubbub. Yep. And that really heard her. She's like,

what are you dropping me just like that? Yes. And her downfall was cheating at the card game. That's right, which she'd learnt all those years earlier when she was working in the pleasure casino, whatever it was called. The secret casino.

To finish up, here's a little summary written by Nichols. At the heart of her career, if you could call it that, Mrs. Liversey was a household name. She had over 40 aliases, eight official marriages, five divorces,

four children to different men, and had travelled throughout the continent to America, Asia and the Pacific in the best style possible, had numerous arrests and court appearances and was imprisoned several times. Florence Elizabeth Ethel Swindles was an actress and artist a stole away a spy, a gambler, an air raid warden, a nurse and aress and above all a notorious conwoman. She could never stay still, she loved a good story, she sought fame and fortune, flaunted the law, deceived and had little regard for others, was impulsive, and never seemed to plan ahead.

Ethel was one amazing woman. The end. I don't know. I really like Nichols. I like her writing. But I don't know if she knows what the word amazing means. I mean, she does amaze.

Yes. Yeah, that's maybe just not in a positive sense. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, I think it was all, maybe there's part of it is she's writing, basically writing the biography of her friend's grandmother. Yeah.

So there's like she's looking for a little positive spin, but it feels hard to find a... And in summary, your grandmother was a piece of shit. Real piece of shit. And I'm disappointed I couldn't find information about her death because I was hoping it had been violent. An incredible story. I'm not rooting for her at all,

but what a wild story. That was fun. That was a fun story. That was a great story, Matt. Well, I appreciate it. I'm just the vessel. I'm just a messenger here. Of course, of course.

They say don't shoot the messenger, but we can thank the messenger. That's right. Don't shiv the messenger. I was nervous early on. I'm like, because I read... Shift me once. Shame on you. I skim the story.

And I'm like, I can't... I didn't feel like there was anything big, but it was just the sheer amount of things. And her just repeating the same. Yeah. It was a wild story. Yeah. Yeah.

And it's one of those... Australian stories, like I mean, Australian slash English story that for some reason, I'd never heard anything about it. And it sounds like it was lost to history a bit. Yeah, that's right. Until Nichols wrote the book. But also at the time,

she's on the front page of all those newspapers. That's right. So she's been able to go back through these interviews and other historical documents. But it's so amazing that a story can be so big. And at the time, people were probably like, this is the wedding of the year, the fraud of the year.

And then, you know, 50 years later, everyone's like, who? What? I know. Well, that brings us to everyone's favorite section of the show where Jess has left the building. Everyone was counting down to her exit. We have lost Jess. We're recording this a few days later.

Because it was what, 1 a.m. or 1.30 when we stopped recording? Pretty late. I knew I had work in the morning. Yeah. I was very productive that next day. I bet you were, yeah. So, yeah, we're doing this without BOP. so you're going to have to fill some of her roles today

yeah fuck you but also I'm sweet that's pretty good thanks so this section of the show it goes for about 30 to 40 minutes every week I thought it's 20 to 30 you're blowing out there no it's always been 30 to 40

you sure yeah I reckon okay all right somewhere around 30 but sometimes it nudges up to 40 well someone will get the graph going and we'll get an average yeah that's a mean get a median

There's a few people who get hurt by the length of it sometimes, but, you know, this isn't for them, even though it kind of is because some of them are Patreon supporters. But this is the section where we thank our great supporters who support us at patreon.com slash dogoenpod or dogoompot.com. And once you're on there, Dave, all sorts of rewards you can get. It's right. We're putting out three bonus episodes a month. At the moment, you also get access to the back catalogue, which includes heaps of, um, mini reports on some pretty wild topics, as well as we put out our Brendan Fraser themed podcast phrasing the bar.

Our Dungeons and Dragons, do go D&D. You get the whole campaign there, lots of stuff to listen to, as well as access to the Facebook group, which is very, very nice. Presale tickets. You get to vote for topics and just feel good about supporting the show. You get to feel good, hey? Hey? What more reward could you want?

Exactly. And the first of the rewards that we get into is the fact quote or question section, which I think has a jingle that goes something like this. Fact quote or question. Ding. He always remembers the ding. And in this one, the people on the Sydney-Shaunberg level or above get to give us a fact, a quote or a question, or a fact or a suggestion.

I said fact twice then. Yeah, well, we love facts. You can be whatever you like, really. And you also get to give yourself a title. And we read four out each week. I don't read them until I read them. And this week, the first one comes from Pete Holburton. Dave, who I believe you bumped into.

Am I remembering that right? Yes, Pete. How are you on the streets of South Yarra? I bumped into Pete whilst he was headphones in. And he goes, I'm listening to you right now. I'll listen to an episode. So that was quite amazing. And Pete's title is NASA fanboy in charge of deliberately misunderstanding the requirements.

Am I saying that right? or is it Naysa? I think we enjoy saying Nayser. So Pete has given us a fact writing, Hi, Matt, Jess and Dave. Here's my fact, quote, question, brag and suggestion. Holy moly. Okay, that's the requirements that he's missed out.

Yeah, that's right. Fact, Buzz Aldrin's mother's maiden name was Moon. Quote, the third man on the moon, Pete Conrad, was only 5'6, 168 centimetres tall. referencing Neil Armstrong's that's one small step his first words on the moon were whoopee man that may have been a small step for Neil but that's a long one for me

that's very funny if true he chose the words to win a bet but the loser of the bet never paid up wow have you heard of that before I've never heard that that feels like something that we should know I guess now we do amazing thing because you'd be going through your mind

what are you going to say What are you going to say? You all said these iconic words a year or two earlier and you're like, all right, I've got a match up to that. Oh, whoopee. That's great. Bragg, I've met 12 of the 24 astronauts who have flown to the moon, including six of the 12 who landed.

Wow. How? How, Pete? Tell us. How? Are you going around to their houses? What's going on? Are you stalking these people, Pete?

12 of the 24 that have been there and six of the 12 that have landed. Wow. Or stood. Maybe goes to a lot of those spacecon events. Nice. Do they have them? Like the comic book ones? Yes, you know, space con.

All the famous people are there. Yeah. Signing your collector cards. Signing your piece of the moon. Moon rock. Suggestion. Apollo 13 would be an excellent report topic. Because we've done Apollo.

Sorry, Apollo 13 would be an excellent report topic. We did Apollo 11. That's right. I've actually put it up for the vote before. I've seen the movie Really Tom Hanks was involved Yeah I remember

I remember seeing it on the movie On the on the television in the 90s I went to the I saw that for my It was my birthday Whatever year that was For a 117th birthday or something What a celebration

Did you go with like with friends or something What did you go over the band I remember I went with a couple of friends Is there a scene where they're pissing out into space That's maybe the only thing I can remember from the movie I don't recall that I don't yeah I don't remember much about it

I wonder what year it came out I don't know what do we call it Polo 13 It's a Ron Howard movie right 1995 Wow Yes Good cast

So I was a repeating primary school For the 15th 16th time And a question Is this taking the piss I'll answer my own question Yes yes it is I promise I won't do it again Love the pod

Thanks for all the last. I think it's totally fine to have a fact quota question and question if it's on the same topic. On the same topic and they're all brief. And they're all good. Yeah. I must say, Pete, they're all impressive ones. But you're right.

Don't do that again. The problem is he starts a precedent and then all of a sudden this thing blows out beyond the 40 minute barrier that I promised. And people are suddenly being like, uh, actually screenshoting time codes and sending them to you. That's right. Thank you, Pete. Loved it. Next one comes from Shannon Burns. who's the official provider of passive aggressive customer service.

And they're asking a question, which is, what is the weirdest coincidence that happened to you? They've answered the question. Thank goodness. It's the kind of one that you need a bit of notice on. And I feel like I should check the questions first and give them to you and Jess ahead of time. Yeah, because I don't like disappointing people,

but the biggest coincidence. Yeah. Some of them you just have an answer. that comes straight to mind. Sometimes, like, this is specific. I'll read out Shannon's. Okay. And then see if that jogs your memory at all.

Maybe it involves me, and that could also be mine. That's true. Shannon writes, I was listening to your Super Bowl episode. Well, you just talked about a great coincidence with Pete. That's right. I'm listening to you right now.

That's the second time that's happened on that street in South Yarra. Wow. That's a wild coincidence. It was with the Coca-Cola episode last, I remember. or someone said, I'm listening to you. While drinking a Coca-Cola.

Yeah. I was drinking a Pepsi and that was, was that irony? I don't know. I was drinking new Coke. I was listening to your Super Bowl episode while walking and playing Pokemon Go. You mentioned that during one halftime show, the acts included a frisbee catching dog named Ashley Whippet. I was walking past a Pokemon Go gym at that moment

and decided to check which players had Pokemon. Does that make sense to you? That's the end of it. Oh, okay, I thought there was going to be something out. Yeah, it feels like it's missing a part of it. I don't know if that got cut off or something or am I just not understanding this? Because there's no full stop at the end.

From the top, from the top. What were they doing with the Frisbee? They'll listen to the episode. So listen to the Super Bowl episode while walking and playing Pokemon Go. The weirdest thing is, this is that there's a Pokemon go gym. Yeah, I think there must be designated zones or something. Oh, okay.

I thought it was like a gym where Pokemon people, like, you know, like with the barbells had Pikachu drawn on them and stuff. No, because in the game and the TV show, the whole thing, there's these different gyms that you go into and to get a badge, which to become a Pokemon master, you need all the badges. You have to challenge the leader of that gym. Oh, right. So it's like scouts.

Yeah. Dib, dib, dob. Yeah, I'm just going to say yes. I haven't deja vu about that. Did we talk about that recently? And none of us, there were no scouts in the area to confirm what deny that dib-jib-dib-dob is a thing. In the area, what do you mean?

In the vicinity that we could ask. That wasn't you? No worries. Different podcasts, probably. I only talk to people on podcasts. Do you do podcasts in areas surrounded by people often? Or was it a live show, you think? Maybe I thought it was a live show.

Right. Anyway, so Shannon writes, you mentioned that during one halftime show, the acts included a frisbee catching dog named Ashley Whippet. I was walking past the Pokemon Go Gym at that moment, decided to check which players had Pokemon. Yeah, that's got to be cut off. I'm imagining someone in the Pokemon Gym had a character called Ashley Whippet. Yes.

Or they were flipping around a Frisbee in the gym or something. Yeah. But maybe you could come back to us with that. That's part one. If you get back to us before or record the next one, I'll come back with the stunning conclusion. Yeah, that's right. To be continued.

Next one comes from Susie Costa, from Sacramento in California. People don't normally do that, but you can put next to your name where you're from if you want. I like that. I like that, too. I can really now I can picture Susie Costa. Yeah.

Sacramento, the capital city of California. Sacramento Kings. Is that a something? That's a team in maybe ice hockey? Yeah. Or an old basketball team? Anyway, see that for you. Susie is the senior analyst of Nibla and Canoli.

They're still playing the NBA. There you go. They're two rescue dogs. Still playing the NBA. Oh man. That's got to be brutal if anyone's a Kings fan. I watch the NBA. I don't even know.

You don't even know. They're so irrelevant at the moment that I didn't even know. realize they were still a team. I think they must be the fourth one in California, right? Yeah. Four of four. Is there four? You got the,

Lakers. Clippers. Clippers. Golden State. The Warriors. And they're all pretty good. Yeah. Or, you know, have been in recent times.

And then the Kings. The Kings are they have won a championship in 1951. Yeah, right. There you go. Anyway. Susie, sorry about dissing your team, but Susie's got a fact writing, I have a brag and a fact, a bract. This is my first time writing in as an upgraded Patreon member. I think of it as an upgraded, the Sydney Shineberg upgraded Patreon level. Uh-oh, Susie writes, Matt Stewart,

prepare for a compliment ride. First, the fact, Matt Stewart's laugh is the same as my late fiancés, also named Matt. He passed away five years ago from brain cancer at the age of 28. Oh, that's so sad. That sucks. I'm sorry, Susie. Yeah, sorry to hear that. For a few years, I couldn't remember what my Matt's laugh sounded like, and it broke

my heart. The moment I realized that the similarity was incredible and made me cry. In those fun and rare moments where Mr. Matt Stewart gets a good laugh, it brings me back to the good days with my Matt. He always manages to laugh even when facing such an awful cancer and he enjoyed pods too. I didn't discover your pod until after he passed, but I'm sure he would have loved all the sports episodes

since he was the biggest sports nerd ever. Maddie's laugh and regret face bring me so much joy and so does the show. Thank you for allowing me to remember my mat during the show. Also, pretty wild that a Matt from Australia and a Matt from California have the same laugh. Yeah, wow. Now my brag, after losing my mat, I met a wonderful man named Morgan who accepted me as I am, grief and all.

He and our aforementioned pups have allowed me to experience joy again, and we're getting married. Congratulations. Oh, congratulations. Our dogs will be there too. It's going to be a fabulous time. I'm also going to walk down the aisle to I believe in a thing called love. I noted that for Jess because there's a great darkness on. of course.

But Susie, Dave and I are also Darkness fans. And we also believe in a thing called love. We believe in a little thing called love. That's right. Just as a rhythm of a lot. I would not be opposed to you hijacking my reception for a live podcast with a bunch of annoyed old people who don't know what podcasts are. If you're interested, let me know.

Congrats on your wedding too, Dave. Oh, thank you. I honestly, we chose to get married at a private residence just so we could have our dog Humphrey there so I totally get why you would want your pups there. And you might have heard Humphrey bark in the background as moments ago. This is the post he just arrived. Keep up the great work. You three make Tuesdays my favorite day of the week.

I hope to travel to Melbourne to see you live someday. Long live Jeff the Talking Mongoose, lots of love and sugar bowls. Susie, that's a very lovely message. Yeah, congratulations. And we're going to have to get you laughing more, Matt, for Susie. Yeah, I don't know. I don't think I like the idea that I don't laugh that much. I feel like I laugh a bit silently.

It's just rare that I laugh audibly. I don't feel like you're not an ungenerous podcast laugher to pod with. But Jess and I do talk about how sometimes we get you on a role, it's both one of the most hilarious and joyous things you can see but also it feels very satisfying because you see there you go you do lots of little chuckles but wouldn't you do the big one that is it's rare but worth the way

that's great I love the reference to Jeff the talking mongoose I think I saw the movies getting made about it yes and it had someone famous in it I think but yeah that was wow what a what a message to receive Susie really glad you're listening and so so stoked that you found Morgan and you get married with the dogs and everything's yeah I mean I'd totally be up for heading over to Sacramento to gate crash a wedding but hell yeah

check out a king's game over there yeah yeah our fourth favorite of California I feel bad I knew that I'm sure I knew that I'm coming off a sickness all right everybody because you know so much more about NBA than me and I was thinking Oh, I thought they were a basketball, but obviously Matt would know. Oh, brutal. And the Jeff, the Talking Mungoose, it's going to star Simon Pegg. Oh, wow. As Jeff. Honestly, maybe.

And the final one this week comes from Julian Wren, aka the patron formerly known as Julian Barnes. Oh, Barnsey. Now, Rennie. Love it. So, what's the new name? Julian Renn. Julian Renn. Like the bird.

Love a Wren. Beautiful. That's a great name. I mean, Julian Barnes also a good name, but Julian Ren. Yeah, I think Friend is a big fan of Blue Fairy Rens, and they're just freaking beautiful little birds. I mean, they're no Irish magpie, but... I mean, but what is?

Yeah, they're up there. But what is? Anyway, Julian has a brag, which is, hey, guys, my brag today is that I'm sitting in the hotel sweet right before my wedding. Oh, is that why the change of name? Me and my future husband are chilling out, calming the nerves by listening to some choice moments from old dugon episodes. Oh my God.

Dave, as Jeff the talking mongous from the fifth dimension. Talk about coincidences. There it is. Isn't that weird? That is amazing. That episode is years old. That's right. So it's a bonus Patreon episode for anyone who wants to hear it.

And, um, yeah, it's got to. to be like four years old or something. I reckon, yeah. That's a wild coincidence that two people mentioned back. I hadn't thought about that much in a long time. And both wedding related as well. Yeah. The coincidences don't stop.

Don't tell me Julian's from Sacramento. No. Julian is a king. Well, I love that Jillian's writing this message from backstage at the wedding, basically. Yeah. Backstage at a wedding. That's incredible.

So at the time, chilling out, listening to moments from do go on episodes, including Jeff to talking mongoose from the fifth dimensions and cries of release the slugs are a very calming presence on this very busy day. Obviously, marrying the man I love is very exciting, but what's equally exciting is I get to take his last name, which is a huge upgrade from my boring old one. Julian Wren is absolutely a name I feel would be admired by the podcast. Big, big fan. It sounds like an actor's name.

Yeah, starring Julian Wren. Yes. Or even a director directed by Julian Wren. And if I'm being honest, Julian Barnes is already pretty good. That is a good name. Yeah. You started from a solid ground level. You were a Barnsey.

And you've, you know, you've shot into the stars, the stratosphere. You're a Renzi. The Renisphere. It's a René. I should probably wrap this up and go get married. As always, thanks for all the laughs that we got to share as a couple, including a couple of dates at live shows. And we look forward to listening to more as husband and husband.

Congratulations, Julian. That's so freaking cool. I love, it's wild to me that you're thinking of us on your wedding day like that. Yeah, yeah, that's right. That's fair, like, that's just, I mean, same as Susie's message is just sort of, Yeah, it blows me away those kind of messages that were part of people's lives like that. Sorry to get sincere. Yeah.

Yeah. No, but I totally agree with you. But it's beautiful. And, you know, we believe I think I'd love here to go on. So, um. I wonder where Julian's from. Been to a few live shows. So possibly a local.

Yeah. Well, I mean, there's multiple cities we've done multiple shows, I guess. Yeah. Could be from London. Could be from leads, lead, lead, lead, lead, leath. But thanks so much to Julian, Susie, Shannon and Pete. Loved all those messages. Really sorry Shannon that yours cut off,

especially if that was my fault. I've somehow deleted half of it at some point. But please get back to us with the rest of that coincidence. And yeah, the next thing we like to do is play a little game. Isn't that right, Dave? That's right. Maybe you can do it today. She's very good at coming up with it.

So we usually based on the episode, this is a few days since we've recorded it now. It is, of course, about our imposter. Yeah, all those fake names. Andeson. So maybe we can give everyone an imposter name. Yep, great one. I think that's... Especially when we're missing our most creative brain in the room.

I think it's good to keep it simple. We don't want to go too outside of the box. Yeah, that's right. But I think this could be fun. So what we're going to do is take their name and give them another name. Yes. So, and what Ethel often did was use her real first name and just change the surname. So, you know, we could do anything here.

Wow. All right. So maybe I'll kick it off. We do nine each week. That doesn't split well two ways. Maybe I'll do the first five. Okay. All right.

First up from Walton on Thames in Great Britain or Thames, I should say. Walton on Thames in Great Britain. It's Kate Robson. Kate Robson. What about Kate's James? the name to crate Mick Hobson

Oh yeah that's good So it's So it's almost So if Kate Accidentally said The wrong name They'd be like

So did you say Kate or crate Oh yeah yeah I'm crate Sorry I'm Craig And Kate's the nickname Yeah People call me Kate

Because obviously Crate's not really A name My parents were My parents were high Yeah My parents were off Their fucking chops

Crate Mick Hobbs That's great That's great Kate Great Next stuff I'd love to thank from Riga.

Riga. It's Riga. That's the capital of Latvia. In Latvia. Alice Goldmain. Oh, fantastic name right off the bat. Oh my goodness. That's hard to change that to be any better.

Yeah, it won't be better. Alice or Elise Goldman. The other thing that Ethel would do would be using famous actors names. Oh, okay. Yes, yes, yes. People she really admired. So maybe Elise Goldmaine could be Rebel Wilson. Like the actor, no?

No, I don't. Or they pretend. I've never come across them. Yeah, I thought Rebel was Australian. No, Latvian. Latvian, yeah. People make that mistake all the time. Yeah, yeah.

You know, couldn't probably point out Latvia on a map or Australia, I guess. Good luck. It's funny that I went, my first instinct was Julia Roberts. I'm like, it's got to be a funnier name than that. And then my brain accessed Rebel Wilson. Thank you so much Alice Goldmane, okay Rebel Wilson. And I'd also love to thank from Somerville in, I reckon Massachusetts. Wow.

In the United States, MA or is it Maine? I mean, you've said it wrong, obviously. How do you say Massachusetts, probably? Massachusetts. Thank you. I love to thank Adele Nitechus. Adele Nicious. What about?

Was it Adele Nazim? That's the way that John Devolta mispronounced, the Frozen. Yeah, yeah. Nadel, Nizim. Right, Nadeem, perfect. Adel. Oh, Madel. Oh, man, it must be so fun to have the name, Adel.

That's great. I'm Adele. Beautiful name, though. Imagine the first, what, part of your life, there weren't that many famous Adel's. Yeah. So, yeah, do you think maybe it would have felt like someone was muscling in on your teeth? Yeah, well, whoa, whoa, whoa, I always thought that I'd be famous and that I'd be the Adel.

I'm the famous Adele. Like, I'm the Dave. Yeah. Just saying. Hmm. I guess you can shorten it to make it your own. Or change it to the Dell. Yeah, she's Adele, but I'm the Dell.

The Dell. I'm just looking up Somerville, Massachusetts. You're absolutely right. Home to Tufts University. Oh, Tufts. Just enjoy that. I'd also love to thank from Toronto in Onesville. Ontario, Canada, Haley Davison.

Haley Davison. Haley Davison went around in some, when passing through Goldman, got done for taxi evasion under the name Enrique Inglacius. This is one of the great names. Enrique Inglacius. Yeah, Enrique Inglacius. is now Enrique in handcuffs. Wow.

Enrique. Man, I love that name. Enrique Inglaces. I'm sure I've talked about this before. Maybe I've just done it. I've tweeted it out. There was one time in year seven, I cannot explain my actions why,

you know, the window bit of a wallet. I had a like a Velcro wallet at the open up, the window bit where, you know, people would put a picture of their family or a dock or something.

I had a picture that I'd cut out of a newspaper of a Ricay, Iglesias, and, Anna Konnikova. I think you have told them talking about it. It's very funny. I just can't explain myself.

Why did they do that? Well, that were the it couple. They were a hot couple and people. Is that your mom and dad? Yes. Yes, it is my mom and dad. My granddad is Julio. Julio Iglesias.

Another great name. Frickin hell. That family's overflowing. Oh my goodness. Anna Konakova is the boring name of that family. Come on. They still still together? I believe so.

Anna and Enrique. Beautiful. You never hear about the success stories. No, that's right. They'd only ever make the news again if they broke up. The final one from me from Lenoxa in Kansas in the United States, Mandy Richter. I mean, how freaking great of all these names been. God.

Mandy Richter is very close to Andy Richter. It is very close to Andy Richter. Okay. Is that Conan Sidekick? Yeah. Okay. Do you think it could be Andy Richter? What about Mandy Richter to go under the...

so close what a moanin o'brien oh yeah moaning o'brien yeah I think that makes a lot of sense moan and o'brien

sorry Conan no no no moan moan o'brien if it had a moan and myrtle that feels like it could be like a jazz musician or something do you think

yeah old moan o'brian yeah what was the bleeding gums murphy yeah um yeah

Monen O'Brien. Fantastic work. Thanks, Mandy Richter. Would you like to thank a few of our great supporters? Hey, I'd love to give a shout out and thank you too. From Decatur, Indianapolis. Holy shit, remember Decatur from anything? I think we said it wrong and we're probably saying it wrong there

because I got a lot of corrections on it. I'm like, I'm never going to need to know these corrections. What am I going to say this place then again? Do you remember what I was mentioned? But the Super Bowl episode, the Decatur Staley, was one maybe they won the first ever what became the NFL championship looks like it could be here we go I'm listening to it Decatur Decatur Decatur Decatur Decatur Decatur yeah I remember getting a few messages of people like it's actually pronounced and I'm like I was you know

I want to pronounce things right but usually I'll pay more attention if I'm like oh that's a common thing that will come up again like I eventually feel figured out how to say, I think, or Akron. Akran. Akran. No. Yeah, like Ren. Like Ren.

And that's how there was the bird, someone sent a picture showing it's pronounced like the bird Ren. So, from Decatur, it's Cat Rogers. Cat Rogers from Decatur. Well, seeing as I believe their famous team was the Staley's, maybe, what about, staley knife staly knife I love it which is

yeah I don't know yeah staley I can't remember why they would name staley doesn't really matter

but when I think of staley I think of Stanley and when I think of Stanley I think of knives looks like they start it's now the Chicago Bears oh right

I would have explained all this on the episode yeah I know I retain 5% And you named every team. Every original team. Thank you so much to Staley Knife, aka Cat Rogers. I'd like to thank now from unknown location.

Can I only assume this week this person is deep within the fortress of the mole. I'll listen to this episode right now. It is Kathy Hine. Kathy Hine. Kathy Hine. Hine. When I think Hines, I think Hines. And when you think Hines, what do you think?

Beans. Yeah. Beans means Hines. as the famous ad says. A good name would be beans means. Beans means, yes. So what's your name? Beans means.

Beans means. Any questions? Are you challenging that? Is that your first and last name? Yeah. First and last? First beans. Beans.

Yeah. Surname? Means. Yeah. With a Z. Yeah. Like Heinz. Like Heinz.

My parents are big beans beans. Yeah, they love beans. Go beans. Thank you, Kathy Hein. Heine. Okay, Beans means. I'd like to thank now from Perth in, West in Australia, it's Jordan Quinn.

Jordan Quinn. What was that old song? The Something Quinn. It's like the magnificent Quinn or something. Oh, like very old? Like 60s. Okay, because that sounds like, you know, like maybe a Bob Dylan song that was covered by a band who made it more famous.

Because that to me sounds like when the Saints go marching in. Right. That's what I think you meant like, it's something that old. The Mighty Quinn. Mighty's a good name, good first name. By Manfred Man. made it a hit. Manfred Man's not a bad.

Not a bad. What about first name man? Middle name Fred. surname man. Oh yeah. So if you want to, if you know them quite well, it's man man man.

It is. It was a song written by Bob Dylan in 67 and then Manfred Man made it a hit. Man, Fred, man. Man, Fred, man. Jordan Quinn, okay, man.

Fredman. Thanks so much. And finally, I'd like to thank from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Go penguins. Is that right? We're allowed to say that one? Yeah, Pittsburgh's a Penguins. Thank you to Jake Colliga.

Jake Collega. That's the name you can set your watch too. Detective Jake Colliga. This might be one of the greatest batches of names I've ever had. I think every week somehow you guys manage to top it. Jake Colliga. Okay, something to do with penguins. Penn's a good name.

Pan. Pen. Pen. Yeah, Penn. And Collegas, a big, like college, like a university. What, mate, what do you think of? What would you call a penguin who went to university? What would you, what do you reckon their name would be?

Picture a little penguin with its backpack on, maybe a letterman jacket. And, you know, he's going to a keg a party. Oh, yeah. But he's also, like, getting really good grades. His CPR or whatever they say, SATs are high. SATs, STDs. He's got them all. What about, I'm thinking Jason the penguin.

Jason the penguin. Is Jake Colligger's fake name, surname the penguin? Jason the penguin. I'm incognito. Oh yeah, what's your name? Jason the penguin. And Jake never takes his sunglasses off. Yeah.

Even at night and inside, Jason Penguin. Jason the Penguin. There's the middle name. So normally just goes around as Jason's a penguin. But if you're being, you know, on his SAT report card that says Jason the penguin. So thank you very much to Jake Jordan, Kathy Kat, Mandy, Haley, Adele, Elise and Kate. The last thing we like to do is welcome a few members in to the Triptitch Club. Just two inductees this week.

So the way this works is if you're on the shoutout level or above for three straight years, you're welcomed in to the Triptitch Club. A bit of theatre of the mind. There's a big room. There's a stage. Dave's standing on the stage. He's your hype man. The crowd, everyone who's been welcomed in before is going to be in there clapping along,

cheering your name, and Dave's going to welcome you in with a little pun work on your name or something like that. I'll be at the door. I'll be reading out your name as you enter. Dave's also booked a band normally for the after party. Yeah, absolutely. This week, you never going to believe it. We've actually got Bob Dylan. Holy shit.

Performing from 1967, his hit song, later covered by Manfred Man. The Mighty Quinn. The Mighty Quinn. Wow. But he's doing like the 30-minute, like Bob Dylan version. Yeah, he's doing all his songs. He's playing all his songs that were made famous by other people. All along the Watchtower and other.

There's quite a few. He'd probably be able to pat out a whole set with songs that are probably more famous by other people that he wrote. Um, and, uh, yeah, so there's just two inductees. Jesselma comes up with a cocktail, uh, the ethel. So I'd say it's probably, it's going to be, um, ethel. Ethel. It'll be, would it just be like straight, uh, meth, meth, meth, meth, meth-led spirits.

Methlated spirits, yeah, just homemade vodka. Yeah. But sold to you as if it's a very high quality high price. Yes, that's right. It'll be in a martini glass. Yeah, oh, you sip and you go, oh, that's strong. And you go, yeah, yeah, you get used to it. Just keep drinking and also give me some money.

Yeah, that one is $100 for the drink and a meet and greet. Can imagine Ethel just sitting in a desk and people lining up to meet her. Back then, that's what they did. They were lining up. I was like, we don't even know what it is, but look at this queue. It must be something important. It must be good. All right, so just two names this week.

Are you ready, Dave? I am ready. So usually Jess hypes me up. Did you say you're going to hype me? I'll hype you. Please. Okay. I need you.

Okay. Because obviously a hype man needs a other. Yeah. No, I'm feeling good. Sometimes I'm a bit negative because often you bar like you do a really bad job. But today I want to put that to one side. That's like I'm going to put the history of your past performances to one side. I want to believe in you.

I'm going to try and look at it. Harsclough. Harscloth. Oh God. Half. Half glassful. That's a good name. If we need to give anyone else the name, half glass full is a glass.

No, it is half glass. Anyway. So first up from Corvillus in Oregon, I reckon in the United States, Jason Gears. Oh, put this night into first gear. Yes, Dave, you've done it. And from severance in Colorado, the United States, it's Ethan Gilbert. We will never have to sever this relationship. No severance pay because you're in for life, Ethan.

Dave's in hot form tonight. Thank you so much and welcome Ethan Gilbert and Jason Gears. Grab a methyl ethyl ethyl. And make yourself at home. Methylethelethel's a band. Yeah, isn't it? They're not playing. But anyway...

I mean, we got Bob Dylan. Is anyone complaining about getting fucking Bob Dylan? There'd always be someone complaining. I just don't get his voice, man. So that brings to the end of the episode. Anything else we need to tell people, Dave? We've got new merchandise available. You can go to...

our website do go onpod.com and click through to our new merch store. We will ship it anywhere in the world and you can get t-shirts, sweat shirts, sweat jumpers, hoodies. It's all sweaties. All with our real sweat on it. Yeah, yeah. We've pre-swet through them all. There's stickers and there's also stuff for booksheet and primats or other podcasts.

You can get mugs now. All sorts of stuff made to order and shipped to you. So if any Americans listening, love having that mugger Joe. We got the mug for you. I love a mugger Joe. I love a mugger Joe. I don't know what it is. It's a hot chocolate or is it a coffee?

Who knows? But when you sit back in Decatur, having your mugger Joe? I love just, there's nothing more relaxing than a morning cup of Joe. In a mug. In a mug, yeah. Cup of Joe. Mugger Joe. No, it is Cup of Joe.

It is Cup of Joe. We don't sell cups. We sell mugs. Yeah, that's right. So that's a dig on pod.com. Upgrade your cup of Joe to a mugger Joe. Also on our website, there's links to our Patreon where you want to support the show.

You can suggest a topic via the website and you can get in contact with us on our email, do go on pod. Or follow us on social media at do go on pod. You know something I've recently discovered? We used to say to people, hey, if you listen on Apple, you can give us a rating out of five,

which is great. People still do that. Appreciate people doing that. Gets us up in the charts. You can also rate podcasts on Spotify now, I've noticed. Oh, I didn't realize that. That's cool. A lot of people do listen to this show on Spotify.

So I think it takes you half a second You go on the app Look up our show If you gave us five stars in half a second Give yourself a pat on the back Yeah Have a mugger Joe Yeah

Have a mugger Joe on us Yeah anyway That'd be nice if you It probably affects where we go on the charts Dave please don't take me over the 40 minute mark here We gotta wrap this up We'll be back next week with another episode But until then I'll say thank you so much

And goodbye Later's Bye Don't forget to sign up to our tour mailing list So we know where in the world you are And we can come and tell you When we're coming there Wherever we go, we always hear six months later,

oh, you should come to Manchester. We were just in Manchester. But this way you'll never miss out. And don't forget to sign up, go to our Instagram, click our link tree. Very, very easy. It means we know to come to you, and you'll also know that we're coming to you.

Yeah, we'll come to you. You come to us. Very good. And we give you a spam-free guarantee.