Do Go On - 370 - The Mary Celeste (with Nick Mason)

Episode Date: November 23, 2022

Our second most voted for topic for Block 2022 is the mysterious story of the Mary Celeste; a ship found abandoned in the middle of nowhere.This is a comedy/history podcast, the report begins at approximately 10:16 (though as always, we go off on tangents throughout the report). Support the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: patreon.com/DoGoOnPod Submit a topic idea directly to the hat: dogoonpod.com/suggest-a-topic/ Check out our new merch! : https://do-go-on-podcast.creator-spring.com/  Check out our AACTA nominated web series: http://bit.ly/DGOWebSeries​ Twitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: [e-mail] Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/Who Knew It with Matt Stewart: https://play.acast.com/s/who-knew-it-with-matt-stewart/ Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader Thomas Do Go On acknowledges the traditional owners of the land we record on, the Wurundjeri people, in the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders, past and present.  REFERENCES AND FURTHER READING:https://museumhack.com/mary-celeste/#easy-footnote-bottom-10-14127https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EPR4Ux-U6khttps://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/abandoned-ship-the-mary-celeste-174488104/https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mary_Celestehttps://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/data/batches/curiv_rubidoux_ver01/data/sn85042462/00175035898/1910103001/1391.pdfhttps://www.ucl.ac.uk/news/2006/may/solved-mystery-mary-celeste Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Melbourne and Canada, we got exciting news for you. And we should also say this is 2026. Jess, what year is it? 2026. Thank God you're here. Right now, I'm in Melbourne doing my show with Serengy Amarna 630 each night at the Cooper's Inn Hotel, having so much fun. We'd love to see you there. Canada, we are visiting you in September this year.

If you've somehow missed the news, we are heading up Vancouver, Calgary, Montreal and Toronto for shows. That's going to be so much fun. Tickets for all this stuff, I believe, are online. And I'm here too. Welcome to another episode of Do Go On. My name is Dave Warnikey and as always I'm here with Jess Perkins and Matt Stewart. Hello. Hey, how good is it to be alive?

Hey, it's made even better to be alive when we're joined by one of our favorite people in the world. The so-called fifth beetle himself is here. Nick Mason. Yay. Block forever. Yes, well done. Thank you so much for being here. It's great to be here.

Why did you throw in so-called there, Dave? Oh, that's a great question. It's a bit of fun, a bit of colour. Yeah, just extra words, I think, is important. On a podcast, you're filling, obviously. Yeah, yeah. So I guess this was going to be a short one, so we've got to just keep going and going and going. Well, to make it even longer, so-called, in brackets, in a positive sense, the fifth beetle himself.

I did get a few tweets and social media messages from people saying, you've got to get back on the show. Yeah. Your fifth beetle status is going to be usurped by someone else if you don't come back. Yeah. This year, Cass Page has been on a lot of episodes, when I went overseas a couple of times, doing a great job, Cass.

So there is competition between the fifth and sixth beetle. You don't slip out of the top. I'm not sure that that is even what it means, though. It's not like a, it's not a ranking of appearances. Is it? Now it is. Okay.

And that's how they did it in the Beatles also. That's right. They were constantly switching around. What do you think that rivalry between Lennon and McCartney was? It was between. Oh, two. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Yeah. He was laughing now, John. And they had a board. They had a board in the Beatles in the Abbey Road Studios, and you could swap them all around except Ringoes. Ringoes was welded, like, welded to the wall. It was always at the bottom. Always number four.

Well, he's our fourth beetle as well. Should I start doing that thing that Ringo does on social media, which is take photos of albums with his feet in the frame and seen those? It's been doing a lot of them. I think all the photos of him I've seen is the peace and love, and he's just on the old two fingers up. For sure, yeah. Put them up.

Peace and love. Anyway, it's great to be back for Block. I wouldn't miss it for the world, except for all the times I have definitely missed this. But not this week. No, and you're here. You're here for a big it. Not top three.

Not top four. But the other way. Top one. Top two. Still good. Yes, still good. This is the second most requested or most voted for, I should say, topic for Blockbuster,

slash November 2022, which, Matt, what does that mean for people? I've never heard that before. Well, I put together one of the big, biggest polls, I think, ever. And it's famous for his large poll, Matt. Oh, hang on. That's not even what I was saying.

But the, it's also true. But what I was, what I was meaning was the most suggested topics. I put together in a large poll. And then we have thousands of people vote. And then the ones that are the most popular go to the top. Now, honestly, the top two, this topic and next week topic were dead level. And I had to extend the poll slightly to get a result. This one is, this is a hot topic.

Came down to the wire. It did. Now, of the blocktober topics, which of them this year do you think are going to be turned into major motion pictures? Because a lot of them are being happening. All? Yeah. All, yeah. All except Apollo 13.

I think that has no hope for ever being a major motion picture. Wacker for cloaca, I think certainly will be. Yeah, that's right. I think George Clooney's in talks to play the Clowacker. Yeah. And Julia Roberts, the Wacker. That's right. That's right.

They've been teaming up a bit lately. Gosh, they're good together. Yeah, right they. Because I noticed they did, you guys did the greatest ever beer on, and then they just did that. Yeah. I think on Apple TV or something. Didn't even give it a good name. They're just like, it's greatest, greatest beer one ever.

Yeah. It's fine. They named after the guy's book, so blame him. Or they named it after our podcast episode. Which was named after the book. I think it's a good title for a book. but they could have, you know, they could have hidden it a little. It could have been a bit more mysterious in the film.

That's my thought. We've got like the cocaine bears coming out soon as well. Yeah, it does seem to happen a fair bit. The founder, the McDonald's film, came out just, maybe it was it after or before, one more job. Around the same time. Are we influences? I think Hollywood influences. This is the term I like to throw around.

Usually by coincidence, but a few of these definitely, they're going, you know. Spilberg. Yeah. He's listening in and he goes, hey, Martin. Yeah. Marty. Marty, baby.

Baby, we're close. I call you Marty. Got an idea. Yeah. Every week there's like a junior movie executive in a bathroom just. Yeah. With his figure, just listening to the podcast, desperate for an idea. Yeah, please.

I'm going to pitch something good. Come on. He doesn't realize he can just look at the title. And then probably just do a Google from there. He's like, I've got to listen to this full two-hour report. I don't know. Get to the point. Jesus is if preambles go forever. Everyone at work thinks he has some sort of bowel issue

because he is in the bathroom for two hours. He listens to the Patreon as well. That's good 30 to 40 minutes. We should get Al to do a bowel episode next block. How for the bow. How for the bow? I mean, I feel like... First go.

Yeah. And that's all it takes. I think you're just having a rhyme now I probably set the wheels in motion for this to become a reality. It could happen now. That's how influential rhymes have become. It's dangerous in the wrong hands. It's very dangerous.

So I've explained Block, but what's this show? How does it work? What we do here is we take it in turns to report on a topic often suggested to us by one of the listeners, go away to a little bit of research, and then bring that back in the form of a report to the others who often, nearly always, I'd say, don't know what the topic's going to be.

Now I know the topic, but I can't. think of what it's called. Because Matt has put together the poll. So Jess is reporting this week. Yep. The second most requested topic for Blockbuster. We always start with a question. Jess, what's your question?

Which two names, typically female, when combined, create the name of a ship from the 1800s. Oh, Karen Josephine. It's not Karen Josephine. Christine. You can't think of any... Sarah. Christine, Sarah, no.

incorrect. Mary Jane. Mary is in there. Oh. Is that half a point? Mary Joanna. It's not Mary Joanna or Mary Jane. Oh, cop that, Auntie Joanna.

It's a name. Okay, Mary. It's come to my mind now, but I feel like I probably, I mean, unless either of you want it, I'll take this point. Mary Celeste. Mary Celeste. Sorry to jump in there, may I said, but someone is keeping track who gets these questions right. And I feel like I've really fallen off lately. No, you need that point.

I need it to clawbacker. Also, I didn't know what it was. Oh, okay, okay. Have you heard of that at all this topic? It sounds familiar. Yeah. Any details? I think I, even myself, have put it up for the vote a couple of times,

and maybe it's come second every time. So it feels like it's destined to be second, even in the block, Buster Topo. It's like the Michael Chang of topics. That's right, except for the time he won the French Open. Hmm, okay. Who the fuck is Michael Chang? The youngest of a man to win it.

Really? Michael Chang, I think he was always number two to Agassi and then Sampras. Like he kept being number two and then another all-time great stepped up and took over number one. He's like, oh, Sam Pras is retiring. Oh, freaking hell, here we go. His classic catchphrase, ah, freaking hell. Oh, freaking out. All the fans by the sidelines with, oh, freaking hell.

Yeah, you know, McEnroe was known for like, come on. Yeah, yeah. Ah, freaking hell. Oh, freaking hell. I've Michael Changed all over here again. He was 17 when he won the French Open. Isn't that wild? That is wild.

And that's when he peaked. Yeah, peaked a 17-year-old. Sadly, though, I have not written a report on Michael Chang. Oh, my goodness. Okay. That's what I would have called the ship. The Michael Chang. That's good, actually.

That is very good. Sadly, I have written a report about Mary Celeste. So, really sorry. I'm already here. We might as well. Yeah. I'd, you know, just hold on. Not many.

No. Well, I guess, oh, that's one less than Chang. One less than Chang. This has been suggested by so many people, which isn't a surprise, I suppose. These are the most requested topics that are then voted on once again. So it's been suggested by Ronan O'Neill, Darren, Cosmo McGee. I thought you're going to struggle to beat Ronan O'Neill. No, Cosmo McGee's in there.

Josh Zee, Nate McLean. Matt Barber, Devin Bruins, Jeremiah Bang, Lewis John Davis, Karen Holly, Nile Somerville, Christina Gonzalez, Corey Smith, Joe Caudill, Don's Ronald. There's not a Dada Monctom. Don's, is there a apostrophe there? Don's Ronald. No, Don's is, I love Don's work. I've spoken to Don's. Yeah, Don's Ronald has come up before.

Dons. Gotham Kumar, Celeste. Any relation? Yes. Did you say Gotham Kumar? Gortham? That is sick. That's a great name.

And, yeah, and Celeste, who has spelt out or given phonetic for the surname, so it says, Hajji, Hajjali, Celeste Hadjali, thank you, Celeste. So, yeah, a lot, a lot of people have suggested this topic, so thank you to them, and hopefully we do it. Justice, kind of. I love a little expectation setting early. When you're like, this is big. I was like, oh, no.

Second biggest of the year. I don't think I should be given these responsibilities. Okay, on December 5th, 1872, a crewmate aboard the Dai Gratia alerted the ship's captain, David Morehouse, to a vessel about six miles away that seemed to be a drift in the choppy sea. The ship's erratic movement and the odd set of her sails led Morehouse to suspect that something was wrong. As the vessel drew closer, he could see nobody on deck and he received no replies to his

signals. So Captain Morehouse was taken aback to discover that the unguided vessel was the Mary Celeste, which had left New York City eight days before him and should have already arrived in Genoa, Italy. He sent two crew members to investigate and offer help, but they found that the ship was completely deserted. Whoa. Whoa. Like sand, junes and all that sort of stuff.

Yeah, a little oasis. What do you reckon happen? What do I reckon happen? Yeah, what do you reckon happen? Skip to the end. Early theories. I'm going to go. I got like four more minutes.

Let's move us along. See, if this helps put it in a context of people, 1872 is the year before the St. Kilda Football Club formed. So that makes you think, doesn't it? A different time. Yeah, yeah. Do you think maybe they jumped ship in an attempt to get on the team?

Yeah. They jumped off the ship. We've got to go to Genoa, Italy. what and play football I don't think so No no no Yeah

They jumped off the ship And jumped on the Saints Bandwagon That's right Which has been a rollicking Good time ever since I love trying to set drama

And it immediately Oh no I'm in 1877 I'm being very serious Yeah Good And I want to maintain All of that

Throughout the whole report Yes Dave questions 172 Yes I'll just put that Fair into context That is just 107 years before Michael Chang when he's one and only French Open Championship.

Wow. Makes you think. Any relation? I believe so, yes. To Celeste, who suggested this topic. That is correct, yes. So that means Michael Chang was alive for the 100th anniversary

of the Mary Celeste being found. That's right. Wow. Do you reckon he has any theories? Wow. Can we get Chang on the line? I've got him on the phone. Go for Chang.

Oh, freaking hell, guys. I don't know. Oh, there he's done it again, Chang. This is spooky, though. It's a bit spooky. It's a drift. A whole crew, where have they gone? I've seen lots of people.

And they'd left from the same place. And he's like, they left over a week before us. What are they doing out here? So they've gone aboard to, and they found it completely deserted. The sails were partly set and in a poor condition, some missing altogether. And much of the rigging was damaged, with ropes hanging loosely over the sides the ship. The binical, which is sort of a, a waist, high case or stand on the deck of a ship, generally...

It's pronounced barnacle. Yeah, I was going to say, it's probably bionical. It's not barnacle. Bynical, you sound ridiculous. It could be binnacle. Could it be bionical, the Lego spin-off? The bionicle. Thank you.

Which, yeah, it... Can you tell me again what it is? It's a case or a stand on the deck of a ship. Generally mounted in front of the helmsman, in which navigational instruments are placed for easy and quick reference. and also to protect them. So it's supposed to house the ship's compass. It had shifted from its place and its glass cover was broken. And it's empty, there's nothing in it.

Nothing in it. Ships only lifeboat was missing. And there was about three and a half feet or one and a half metres of water in the hold, which is a significant but not super alarming amount for a ship of that size. A makeshift sounding rod, which is a device for measuring the amount of water in the hold, was found abandoned on the deck. Shits in weird places. Right.

How much have you learned about ships this week? Sweet fuck all. Okay. Because you've been educating me. I've not heard of any of these things. I don't understand every third word I'm saying. I'm reading them. That's why I'm like the binacle and then I've copy and pasted the definition of that.

Well, can I tell you? Yeah. You are selling it. Really? Yes. Oh no, seriously, you guys. I'm getting seasick from these descriptions. It's amazing.

Oh, don't. No, I'm blushing. And that shirt you're wearing, you could be a sailor. Very naughty. I'm always in a striped shirt. I'm a nautical little girl. I like it. I'm a nautical little girl. That's good stuff.

I love to be at sea. I actually hate it. I get very seasick. Jessica gets seasick even when she's not on a ship. Yeah, I'm that good. Land sick. Yeah. I just get motion sick. It's pretty cool. The bionical on the deck, that seems like a recipe for getting, like, your stuff stolen. It's like when a tradesman leaves like the Ute outside the pub or whatever. Yeah.

I'd just take the tools out. I'd be taking the spy glass and the compasses and whatever. How many tradies have you robbed? Tons. Tons. They keep putting them out the front of their pub. Mato's done full renaos at his place. Hasn't paid for a single tool.

And then I get the tools. Chuck them in the skip. I don't need them anymore. I just steal some more. You just take up space. Yeah, they're all single use as far as Mesa's concerned. Disposable tools. They found the ship's daily log in the mate's cabin,

and its final entry was dated at 8 a.m on November 25th, nine days earlier. Oh, my goodness. It recorded Mary Celeste's position then as... It's got the actual, like... Degrees and such. Yeah, right, right. With that.

But that's that, but I'm trying, we're trying to solve. We've got to solve this. We need all the clothes. This could be the key. I've got my, um, my satellite system ready to go. Just read out the coordinates. If you copy and paste that and put it in a Google Maps, it'll pop up. He'll tell you where it is.

Yeah, yeah. recorded Mary Salas position off Santa Maria Island in the Azores, nearly 400 nautical miles or 740ks from the point where the digratta encountered her. So she's drifted for a while. First mate, Oliver Devo. Oh, that's just for the Australians. Yeah, I've been reading this all week and I've probably just said it out loud. Any nominative determinism at work here?

Does he end up pretty devoid? He's a bit devo. He saw that the cabin That's devastated, folks He saw that the cabin interiors were wet and untidy from water That had entered through doorways and skylights You'd be devo at that You'd be pretty devoid

But otherwise things were in reasonable order Oh no, chang's devoid Oh no, Chang's devoid Now do any of these journal entries end in the classic way They all should win as a disaster With like just the pen sliding down the page Just like Oh, that's good, yeah

Oh, and there's somebody coming through the door. Yeah. And then people reading it are like, hmm, what happened there? Yeah. You've been dragged by, you know what? Early doors, I'm going to say it's a polar bear. Okay. I reckon a polar bear got them all.

Right. Yeah, right. Yeah, there was a TV show where that was the twist, wasn't there? Yeah, oh my God, I'm being chased by a polar bear. Yeah. And it's going to get me. Home and Away? Yeah, home and away, yeah.

That's where the Away was, it was the Arctic. And they famously love binacles. They do. It makes sense that they would trash everything, looking at their binocles. Yeah, that makes sense. May I said I was in binacles. He steals them.

I'd love to get a rumor going today that you were a chronic thief. Sure, yeah. Chronic thief. You had the real word for it, which I liked. And you would too, wouldn't you? Yeah, that's right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd have to deny it so many times.

What does it, because he's Googled, what does it mean to be a chronic thief? The captain's personal belongings was still in his cabin. there's plenty of food on board as well some sorts of stay about six months worth my actual initial thought was and this is I don't know maybe I'm also a thief you get on board everyone's gone do you just let the food go bad or do you go to the freezer and go

no one's having this chalky ice cream yeah in 1972 there's a vionetta in here chop it up fantastic fish my favourite just fish yeah I love fish you know those those real connoisseurs they just call

You know, a salmon. Oh, it's a fish. I love a fish. Yeah, that's right. I didn't discriminate at all. I love a fish. What did they have back then? It was all like salt beef.

It was all like just... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Most horrifying. You'd probably, honestly, you'd break out the rum, wouldn't you? Yeah, would, yeah, that's true. Yeah. Well, yeah, there's a lot of that. Tin food?

When was that story you told a while ago and one of the things that brought them undone was the tins were bad? Bad tins. Was that around this time? Early 20th century Overleaf. So you're not too long after this. The bad tens murders.

Oh yeah, you remember that episode? It's between then and Michael Chang winning his one and only French Championship 1909. Did that clear that up? But the same century is Markle Chang. One his only French Open Championship. So he won it in 89. Oh, you weren't alive for it.

No, I missed it. I never saw Chang at his peak. It's disappointing. I'm so sorry. I've never pitted you more. It's my one and only regret. Born too late. Yeah.

So there's plenty of food on board so that they're like, okay, well, they haven't bailed because they're out of food. There's no sign of fire or violence. This is from a really great, I think, boating website I found at Wikipedia.org. It's everything about every boat. Is that where you got your binical definition from? Yeah. Why is it called Wikipedia if it's a boat thing? Yeah, wiki, it's like the fin at the back.

Oh, that's the wikipat. Gotcha. And the Pedia? That's the fin at the front. You think you say Pedia wiki because front and back. Unfortunately, the URL, Finn at the front, fin at the back was taken. It was a bit word as well. So they went for the technical terms. Rudder. I couldn't think of the word writer. That's what happened there.

So from Wikipedia.org. DeVo returned to report these findings. findings to Morehouse, who decided to bring the derelict into Gibraltar 600 nautical miles or 1100Ks away. The derelict is like a type of abandoned ship, essentially. Right, a dero. A dero. A dero brought the dero ship.

That's right. Under maritime law, a salver could expect a substantial share of the combined value of rescued vessels and cargo. Sell that ice cream. Oh, yeah. The exact reward depending on the degree of danger inherent in the salvaging. So if it's pretty risky to bring that ship back, you could get more cash. I was just wondering why they had to move at 1100Ks or whatever it was.

It's like, couldn't we just do it here? Can we, no? It's like a tow truck driver being like, no, sorry, I've got to drive it across the city. You're paying per kilometre of course. It's going to be sea serpents on Flinders Street. Yeah, so I've got to go around. Morehouse divided DeGratia's crew of eight between the two vessels, sending Devo and two experienced seamen to Mary Celeste,

while he and four others remained on DiGratia. I'm going to say that different every time. Nice. What does DiGratia mean? Fruct if I know. Okay. It's what it means. Okay.

Beautiful. Faktif I know. Faktif I know. The weather was relatively calm for most of the way to Gibraltar, but each ship was seriously undercrued and progress was slow. DeGratia reached Gibraltar on December 12th. Mary Celeste had encountered fog and arrived the following morning. Fog, that sounds dangerous.

Does sound a bit You're going to put a fog fee in Yeah Of course You're going to put in a fog Came in a day late mate Oh the fog Yeah

Do you hear the horn I was blasting Foghorn Fog! It's a bloody premium Because we had to undercru This one So you've got to pay more And it's a public holiday

It's a 10% So it's a Boys are doing doubles Yeah That's right Because we don't have enough crew And what I'm gonna pay my boys

For their doubles You gotta pass that on Is that coming out of my pocket No fucking chance Absolutely not We brought in a big ship and my boys have been doing doubles You don't want to pay you can take it up with them

Take it up with the boys But they don't go to be happy Let me tell you that Who do we clearly have been doing novels They have been doing novels They have been doing novels They're pretty tired From the doubles they've been pulling

So Mary Celeste was immediately Impounded by the Vice Admiralty Court To prepare for salvage hearings They went to court for it But what the hell Happened to the crew of the Mary Celeste That is a great question Frick at hell

Where are they? What happened? I'm going to rescind my theory of polar bear because you said no violence. Oh yeah, or fire. Unless the violence of... Maybe the violence of the natural world doesn't count. Yeah, that's right.

They're like, oh, we saw a shit on a claw marks. But, like, you know, no gun, no bullet holes. So it's probably... It couldn't have been violence. Well, let's go back to the ship's very beginnings. Oh. She was first launched on May 18, 1861. Wait, wait, was she a tree at any point?

Oh, shit. If you say beginnings, Jess, please. Well, she wasn't one tree. It's quite a big ship. Yeah. So it's not just like a... It's not like a one big tree equal... See, this is the information we need to solve this mystery, I think.

I don't have... What are you talking to oak? Pine. I think somewhere in here I genuinely have the type of wood she was made with. All right, let's get to it. I'm trying. My money's on balsa. Oh.

Yeah, nice. No. So 1861, originally given the name Amazon. She was... Amazon.com. Is that where she was from? That's where the trees came from. Next day delivery.

Oh, I see what you're saying. Okay, right. Oh, shit. So we tried to drop it up, but you went home. So we've done a loop around the world. 99.3 feet in length, 25.5 feet broad. They must kill you. I was going to say, so.

Close. Just round it up. I know, and it's like 30.3 metres or 7.8 meters. I'm like, fuck. With a depth of 11.7 feet and 198.42 gross tonnage. That sounds like a lot of tonnage. Big boat. She was owned by a local consortium of nine people, headed by shipbuilder Joshua Dewas. Among the co-owners was Robert McLennan, the ship's first captain.

That happens a lot where, like, the captain sort of buys into the ship. They're sort of like a shareholder. Her maiden voyage was June of 1861 and Amazon sailed to five islands to take on a cargo of timber for passage across the Atlantic to London. Oh, that must have hurt as being a mate of timber ourselves

to carry the corpses of other, maybe friends and family. I know, that's rough, isn't it? Yeah. And famously no timber in London, yeah. There's none of it. You've got nothing.

Yeah. I've just crump it. I've added it. They've got so many crumpets. So many crumpets. Chimney sweeps. Yeah. Ships, that's right.

Sorts of those. Sort of the chimneyswis. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mary Poppins's. Yeah, there's at least one of those. Yeah. Fuelizer do-littles, if you know what I mean. Oh, I know what you mean.

Oh, how lovely. Oh, wonderful. Oh, that's what I meant to say. I think I was doing the coffee guy ad again. Yeah. Schwabshi. Oh, wonderful. So I mentioned five islands there.

Just a quick little fun fact here. Five islands is a rural community in Nova Scotia. I thought you're just being very vague about the destination. No, no, no. It's a name of an area. It's named after five small islands. But I had to include this because of the names of the islands. Noose.

Diamond. Long, egg and pinnacle. That's great. Shotgun egg. Good choice. It's a real rag-tag band. I want diamond because they're a girl's best friend. Egg's my best friend.

So you got egg? Who wants moose? I'll take moose. I'll take moose. You got long or pinnacle. I guess I'll take pinnacle. Yeah, I should have jumped in earlier. Yeah.

You went up with the Turkish delight there of that favourites box. After supervising the ship's loading, Captain McLennan fell ill. His condition worsened. And the Amazon returned to Spencer Island where McClellan died on June 19th. So probably not a great omen when your captain, your first captain on your maiden voyage dies. Do you reckon the ship killed him? Oh, I think now we're getting somewhere.

The ship's out for revenge. Then it gets a taste of it. He kills the captain. It's like, you know, I'm going to kill the rest of the crew. I'm going to kill the whole crew. You make me take timber to five islands? Yeah. You're going to get it.

Yep. Yeah. Wait, Mr. McLennan, you're going to get what's coming here. I'm a ship. Yeah. I'm going to eat you. I'm a big ship. How does a ship kill a person?

I mean, I assume you're going to get to that, but... Your early theories are welcome. Well, you know, it's an amethropic ship. You must say that right? Yes. Yeah. So, you know, it has human-like qualities. Yeah.

which are soaked in from the ghosts of those who've come from yore. Right. This is a brand new ship. Yeah. And it's already soaking in ghosts have come from war. You know, the kids that climbed it and fell from it as a tree. Oh, God. Oh, yep.

That's grim. That's really grim. I was killing kids as a tree. Wow. Yes. This thing's been killing for decades. It's been killing for quite a while. Guys, are we writing a Stephen King novel right now?

I think we might be. Yeah. And it's honestly a little too spooiping for me. Glad we're not recording this at midnight. Or on bin night. Because it's late enough, I forgot to put it out. Is what you'd say if we were recording on midnight. Everything's fine.

Everything's fine. Everything's fine. You'll love this. This is who took over as captain. John Nutting Parker. I trust him with my life. Nutting by name. Seaman by profession.

So he took over his captain, resumed the voyage to London, and in the course of which Amazon encountered further misadventures. She collided with fishing equipment in the narrows off Eastport, Maine, and after leaving London ran into and sank a brig in the English Channel. Just hit another boat and sank it. And then did that thing when they blocked the sewers canal for weeks. Ages. When it was on Twitter, it was so embarrassing.

Did that thing. I did that thing. They blocked us a canal. In 1863, Parker was succeeded by William Thompson, who remained in command until 1867. These were quiet years. Amazon's mate later recalled that we went to the West Indies, England and the Mediterranean,

what we call the foreign trade. Not a thing unusual happened. Pretty dull, actually. That was just his mate. It's just his mate. Just his mate saying that. I don't know what that means. I think it's probably like a first mate,

but I don't know what that means. I sure it was just another boat, one of his boat friends, covering his mate. his tracks. We were just hanging out, having a good time. No murder's here. It didn't happen. Certainly.

Yeah, nothing out of the ordinary. I wouldn't investigate anything. It's just, your ship jumps and vomited up. Skellington. Skellington. In October 1867 at Cape Breton Island, Amazon was driven ashore in a storm and was so badly damaged that her owners

abandoned her as a wreck. Did it have wheels? Yes. I honestly, I've gotten through one page. Oh, that's great. It's great. Congratulations. Well done.

That's impressive. And it's a two page report. Two page report? Two page report. So, yeah, have some fun. It's a damage severely. Driven ashore, yes. So, which is bad for a ship.

You don't want a ship to be driven ashore. Unless you're that lotus from James Bond. Oh, and just get up on there. You can wave to everybody on the beach and you can just drive off. Just drive off. And a seagull or do a double take on you. What? What?

What? I don't remember that. from James Bond, any double-taken seagulls. I'm going to watch more closely. I'm going to send you a clip. Thank you. On October 15, she was acquired as a derelict by Alexander McBean of Nova Scotia. Some great names in this.

Alexander McBean? Oh, yeah. Fuck, that's good. The ship changed hands a couple more times within a short period and finally being sold to Richard W. Haynes. Haynes paid $1,700 for the wreck and then spent $8,000. restoring it. Wow. Imagine that would have been a pretty penny back then.

Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's a real fixer-upper. He appointed himself as captain, nepotism, and registered the ship under... He contributed $8,000, whatever. Yeah, but he just a bit... I'm captain, all right, fine, whatever, your ship, your rules, I guess.

And my dad paid for all the instruments in the band, so I'm also in the band, I'm in the band. I'm actually the lead singer. I'm actually the star. My dad drives us, my dad drives us in the van to all the gigs, so. And also I'm a van. If ships can eat people, why can't a van be in a band? This van just wants to sing.

It's Van Morrison. Okay? Yeah. Singing vans. So yeah, Haynes is the captain, and he's registered the ship under its new name, Mary Celeste. That's the name of the ship from earlier. Whoa. She said the name of the show.

Yeah. Any relation? No. Oh, it's crazy. No, it's the same ship. Oh, okay. Oh, that's confusing. I just have a bit of fun there.

Oh, okay, sorry. I know that's... I find fun confusing. I know, but I know. Stick to the facts. However, a couple of years later, the ship was seized by Haynes creditors. Oh, he spent too much.

Much, yeah. And it was sold to a New York consortium headed by James H. Winchester. You didn't have $8,000. You had $1,000. And he said, I'd pay you $7,000 and $99. I'm good for the rest, I swear. Son of a bitch.

Again, more changes and refurbishments were made to the ship in 1872. Her length was increased to 103 feet. She's made a lot bigger. Not 105 feet or 104? 103 feet, okay. Makes you wonder if it's even still the same ship. Yeah. That's a great point.

Real ship of Mary Celeste. Have they done that thing with buildings where they just chuck a spire? I imagine a pointy thing at the front. They put a mermaid at the front. They're like, this is huge. Yeah. Yeah. Otherwise it would be quite difficult to extend it, wouldn't?

it? How do you extend a ship? Put a thing in the middle? You enlarge the wiki at the back. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Bigger wiki. From wikipedia, this thing's huge. That's what. You put, if you were the guy restoring it, you'd put yourself on, instead of a mermaid.

You'd put yourself on the front. I'd put myself as a mermaid. Yeah, nice. And I'd be reading a book to show them cultured as well. Yeah, yeah. And it'd be a really big book. Really big book. Would you have...

What's a big book, Dave? Oh, the big book of stories. Okay. Yeah, nice. Yeah, yeah. Two options. That one felt fake. I thought it was a book expert.

Big book of stories. Google it. Look it up right now. He's got a book podcast. Are you talking about the Bible? Is that what you call it? Okay, yes. Matt, very important question.

You're putting yourself on the front of a ship as a mermaid. Are you wearing a shell bra or are you topless? Oh, is that an option? Where are we at? 1870s? 1860s. Yeah, norgs out, nugs in. That's a big question.

You could do one in one out. Oh, yeah. No, Jess does like that. Keep everyone happy. That's true. I don't personally like that for myself. Oh, what about, yeah. One norg in, one norg out.

Norg? I haven't heard or said that word for so long. Norg. He's trying to blame everybody else now. Yeah, well, you're disgusting. I mean, that's not very polite, norg, is it? I call them chesticles. No, I would say like one really long shell.

Sort of like a shelled boob tube. Yeah, love. that. Yeah, great. Okay, good, good to know. Just got like a crayfish. I'm just working on something for your next birthday, so it's good to know. Is this the cake? Sure. I'm building him a ship.

I know all about it now. So yeah, they've renawed the ship some more, and with a new and improved vessel came a new and experienced captain. I like that. Dead. Dead. In jail. In debt. I really hope the mics can pick up.

This feels now like we're in a ship. There's a bit of a downpour happening outside. The mics probably won't pick up. An incredible tempest out there doesn't. Is this the first time you had some rain outside? This full one, yeah. And it is funny because we do often mention when there's noise like that, and you cannot hear it.

I can never hear it. And I always say, we shouldn't say that because we sound like we don't know. We're losing it. But that's quite heavy. Can you hear that? Ooh. What is that? I don't know, Matt.

What is that? I'm wet. I'm a ghost. I'm the ghost of Stupid Old Studios. Oh, no. I used to be the ghost of whatever this was before, Stupid Old Studios. Wow. It was like a half-painted mural of some Maitai people.

Yeah, they did a Krav Magar. Krav Magar, sorry. Self-defense boys. Yeah, I got Krav Magar to death. That's why I'm here. I got, I was, I was like, I reckon I could take you, mate, and then he craved my guard me and I was dead. He craved my guard me right of the face.

Yeah. Oh. I'm done. He craved my gar. Has that anything? So one thing you can never do, craven you a magar. Yeah, that's against the rules. Yeah, that's a low blow to crave somebody's right near Magas.

That's so good. So we've got a new captain. Who's the new captain? 37-year-old Benjamin Spooner Briggs. No, is that hyphenated? No. So his middle name Spooner. Spooner.

And he tells people. It's fascinating. Briggs. Benny Briggs. Spoon is. Oh, yeah. Spooner is great. I'd be going by Spooner. Captain Spooner. Hello.

Big Spooner or a little Spooner? I'm a little, personally. But what about Spooner? He'd be the biggest Spooner of all you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Captain brings, he was born into a nautical family. His father was also a captain, and all but one of his siblings had also chosen a life on the sea. What was the other one? A juggler. Artists, yeah. We don't talk about him.

In 1862, he married his cousin, Sarah Elizabeth, Cobb and they had two children, Arthur born in 65 and Sophie born in 1870. A whole bloody cutlery drawer, my right, works? On account of all the spoons, spooners. That is good stuff. I want to say that right off the bat. That is fantastic. You're welcome.

You can use that. Thank you. Can I have that? Yeah. But was there a time where you just didn't meet people outside your immediate family? Yeah. Because it feels like that happened more often back in the day. Yeah, I'm just going to marry my cousin.

Yeah. That's what they say as I leave the house. The royals did it a lot. Yeah, and I picture them from the past. Yeah. That was in the wedding vows. Oh, I'm just going to marry my cousin. Yeah, all right.

Yeah, all right. Yeah, I mean, your social circles were smaller then. Yeah, how you keep your family united. You don't travel that much. Yeah. Unless you're a person who travels for work, probably have plenty of opportunities to meet lots of people. Yeah, yeah. But apart from that.

You know, it's a small circle. Yeah, and you've really had no choice unless you're a traveling guy in which case. Exactly. It's a choice you've made to be an absolute choice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like you say, Jesse, if you've got a hot cousin. You've got a hot cousin. You've got to lock that down.

You'd be a fool to walk away from a hot cousin. This guy, Benjamin had like four other siblings. Like any of those could have snagged the hot cousin. Or he could have married any of them, I guess. Oh my God, yeah, he could have married his hot brothers. So easy. Jeez. It's like he wasn't thinking.

Where was his head at? You all right? Idiot. He really settled for this hot cousin. Always off with the seas. Oh, look at the waves. Oh, that's where he's always, he's dreaming of the waves. Come on.

He's head in the waves, this boy. He's got a wet head. They should have called him wet head spoon a spoon a man. Yeah, wet head spoon a man. That's what I should have called him Mr. dishwasher. Yes. He's a head's spoons in the... It's wet.

He's got wet spoons. That spoons, yeah. He came back around, well done. I've got to say, right off the bat. That is good stuff. You can use that. From the time of Sophia's, Sophia or Sophia is their daughter,

by the time of her birth, Briggs had achieved a high standing within his profession. The guy that gave himself his own job? No, no, no. No, this is a different one. This is a different one. Okay. Nevertheless, he considered retiring from the sea

to go into business with his seafaring brother, Oliver, who had just grown tired of the wandering life. And he was also very hot, his brother. I cannot be bothered going to see anymore So I'm going to go into business with my brother Who goes to sea It doesn't feel like a great way to get out They did not proceed with this project

But instead invested his savings Each invested his savings in a share of a ship Oliver in Julia A, Hallick and Benjamin in Mary Celeste But maybe he should have pursued that business With his brother a little harder Okay So Captain Briggs is a part shareholder He's a captain of the Mary Celeste

For her maiden voyage Since her extensive renovations He arranged for his wife, Sarah and daughter Sophia, to accompany him while his school-aged son Arthur was left at home with his grandmother. Did he marry her? Yes, the seven-year-old boy married his grandmother. It was a different time, wasn't it? A beautiful time, I'd say.

If you've got a hot grandma, you've got to lock that down. Your other cousins might get in there. Your other cousins might get in. Wasn't that the disappointing thing about Harry? He ended up, I think that's why England's so annoyed with him marrying an American. Because his hot nana was right there. Right there. You've got some beautiful hotty cousins.

You know? Yeah. Marry one of them. And they're like, geez, she's from another country. Yeah. We're not in the business of widening the gene pool. No, no, no, no, no. What about your stepmother Camilla?

Yeah. You know, is that far enough away? Yeah. If we deepen this gene pool too much, people will drown. This is safety. We'll put a fence around it. It's a puddle. That's nice.

It's the first time I've heard the Royal Family described as a puddle, and I think it works. Absolutely. In many levels. So Briggs was, he was careful to pick a skilled crew. So remember,

he's like, he's choosing this crew for their skill levels. You got an escape artist. You've got a bomb guy. You got a man in a van. You got a guy who could do lots of different accents. You've got the wheel man.

He's turning the big, the big wheel. The little guy, you're not sure what he's going to do, but when he does it. Oh my God. Holy shit. He'll go crazy. So you got the first mate, Albert G. Richardson, who was married to a niece of Winchester. So it was nepotism again.

Very skilled. Very skill. They'll pick them based on their skill, but also the bosses. And I don't know many people. It's one of the few people I've seen before. But they'd sailed together apparently. Everybody else has like a missing leg or something. So like, you know.

Which you'd think would put them right up the list. Right? And, you know, shipman, if I'm drawing a ship person... Got a peg leg. Peg leg. Yeah. And he's overlooking them? At least one person's got a bird on their shoulder.

Yeah. That says kind of creepy things. And you're like, oh, God. Marry your cousin. Yeah. Which wasn't seen as creepy back then. No, now though. I was seen as sound advice.

Yeah, that bird was saying don't marry your cousin. Yeah. They're like, what the fuck is this bird's problem? This bird's a sicko. Walk the plank bird. We had second mate and... Andrew Gilling, Stuart Edward William Head, and four general seammen. Or a grow up.

Grow up, Dave. Ed Head Head. Head. Oh, I've only just gotten it. Okay, that is good. That's good stuff. Then there were, yeah, four other crew members who were all German and from the Frisian Islands. Brothers Volkett and Boy Lorenzen, Arien Martins, and Gottlieb Goodschau.

Oh, yeah. Nice. Incredible name. I really only added those because they were great names. I think Godlib Goodshout is one of our listeners, actually. Beautiful name. Beautiful name. Imagine a beautiful person.

Yeah. Was one of them called boy? Yeah. You their boy. I saw it written in one source as like Boz. It was B-O-Z, then several others had it as B-O-Y-E. Oh, combine them, boys. Boys.

So the Mary Celeste was loaded up with cargo, and their cargo was 17, well, actually, it was 1,7001 barrels of alcohol. Wow. Drink one or throw it overboard. That's right. We don't need this. Make it walk the plane. Yeah, roll it off the plane. Go on, go on.

Why do you need to just one extra? They've partied. And they're full and overboard or something. That's what's happened. That's one theory. They start with 2000. Yeah. In a letter to his mother on November 3rd, Captain Briggs wrote,

Our vessel is in beautiful trim, and I hope we shall have a fine passage. On Tuesday morning, November the 5th. Yeah. Mary Celeste left Pier 50 on the East River in New York. city. Again, from that wonderful boating website, Wikipedia.org. The weather was uncertain and Briggs decided to wait for better conditions. He anchored the ship just off Staten Island, where Sarah used the delay to send a final letter

to her mother-in-law. Tell Arthur, she wrote, I make great dependence on the letters I shall get from him, and we'll try to remember anything that happens on the voyage which he would be pleased to hear. Or anything what might happen. Yeah, that'd be great if she can explain it. Yeah, I'll let him know. The weather eased couple of the weather eased couple of things. A couple days later, and Mary Celeste left the harbour and entered the Atlantic. The next time it was seen was when Captain Moorhouse's DiGratia came across it abandoned a month later on December 4. What do you reckon happened?

I'm back to polar bear. Yeah, maybe, yeah. Drunk polar bear. Yeah. And what was that other thing? We said, oh, I didn't it ate. The ship. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then the polar bear got them, and then the ship's like, I'm not going to leave them lying around. As is tradition, you have an extra. cast of rum for any polar bears you might meet, hence the 1,7001. It's like how we leave out milk for Santa, you leave out rum for polar bears. Yeah, Bundaberg rum, exactly, yeah.

That's why it all makes sense. That's why it all makes sense to me. So if a polar bear turns up on your boat, there's no sign of violence. If I see a polar bear on my boat, I'm just jumping off. Totally, yeah. I'm getting out of there.

See you later. Well, I'm partying with the polar bear. He's probably got merch and stuff. You get your foam hat or something. Well, I'm not arguing with a polar bear. If a polar bear's like, get the fuck off this boat. I'm like, yep.

Fair enough. So there doesn't have to be signs of violence. I think just the intimidating presence of a polar bear would be enough. He just have to point over the edge and I'd go, yeah. Yeah, no, Roger that. Gotcha. Didn't you have the, what was the rhyme you told us recently, Dave, about bears? If it's brown, flush it down.

If it's black, call the quack, doctor. Because it's not good. Or you've been taking iron supplements. I think that's, is that what you're asking about, Matt? If it's black, fly back. If it's brown, lie down. If it's white, say good night. It was like you've got no.

So just got a little nap. Yeah. No night. It was a good night. It was something like it was basically like you've got no. You've fucked. Wow. Yeah, I think my response regardless would be panic.

If it's a Berenstain, call on your friend Frankenstein to fight on your behalf. Yeah. And if it's if it's Barinstein, Mandela effect have you seen? That's right. Uh-huh. So early we left off with the Mary Celeste being taken to. Gibraltar. From accounts I read, people seemed less interested in finding the 10 people.

There was seven or 10 people on board. They were more interested in salvage hearings. Essentially, can we get some cold hard cash from finding this abandon ship? So salvaged court hearings commenced on December 17. It was four days after Mary Celeste arrived back in Gibraltar. They're just like, let's get stuck into this. Who gets some cash? The hearing was conducted by Frederick Solly Flood,

who's attorney general of Gibraltar. and he was described by a historian of the Mary Celeste affair as a man whose arrogance and pomposity were inversely proportional to his IQ Love that combo So he wasn't pompous but he was very clever Very smart and humble That's great

An absolute king But also as the sort of man Who once he made up his mind about something Couldn't be shifted It's funny a historian getting this just from like just from anecdotal stuff or from the writings of this guy like this fucking compass asshole After hearing testimonies

Flood was convinced that foul play had occurred And that the ship's massive alcohol cargo was the reason He ordered an examination of Mary Celeste Which was carried out by John Austin Surveyor of Shipping Stay weird He noted cuts on each side of the bow Caused he thought by a sharp instrument

Polarbeau cause. Oh yeah. And found possible traces. Was Wolverine alive at this point? I think he might have been alive at this point. Because he's like immortal or something? He's older than he'd think. But he looks great.

He's a slow age. Yeah, something like that. Which is tricky because Hugh Jackman's a normal age. Oh, not quite normal. As far as we know. Yeah. Maybe he's not like. He looks great.

He's coming back, isn't he? He's coming back. Yeah. To do Deadpool. Yeah. And to sink a ship. Holy shit. Do you know that?

Well, I. Because that connects direct. That was all reveal I had coming up, but you've now, spoiled. I think it might be Wolverine. God, you guys are just not letting me build the drama here. Cuts on the bow. He also found possible traces of blood on the captain's sword. Oh, okay.

All right. Polar bear's blood? No, polar bear sword. He dueled the polar bear to the death. And the polar bear was like, if you lose, you'll have to jump off. I'm not going to kill you. You're going to jump off the ship. Take your chance.

His report emphasized that the ship did not appear to have been struck by heavy weather. A diver's report on the hull concluded that the ship had not been involved in a collision or run a ground. So they're like, okay, there's no... Essentially, they're trying to think of, like, reasons why a captain would call for an abandoned ship. So, like, if they run aground, no. Big damage to it, they've come across really bad weather. No. They've taken on a little bit of water, but, like, nothing that's super dangerous.

These reports, they're like the podcast of their day. Everybody's just sitting around and they're just like, and there was blood on the sword? Are you kidding me? This is great. Wow. Our lives suck. We live in this stupid town.

Thank God for our attractive cousins. Another round of inspections were carried out by a group of Royal Navy captains, and they also agreed that cuts on the bow had been caused deliberately. Oh. Now, where's the bow again? That's on the outside bit, right? Yeah. When the bow breaks the crane of the fall.

No, that doesn't help. It's a bit different. The bow is just like the bottom bit, right? Yeah, the bottom bit. Yeah, the hull. It's the whole. It's the hole. It's the inside.

The hull's the inside. I think the bow is the front. Isn't the stern in the back? Oh. I'm so sorry, boat people. Portman-Toe side. Is that one? Yeah, that's the absolutely.

Yeah, that's right. And then you got the other one. It's when the deck goes into the poop deck Yes Now the poop deck Now I'm with you The bow is the forward part of the hull Okay

Of a ship or boat The point that is usually most forward When the vessel is underway So what Mesa said I just played a monkey island game That's how I'm like The new one? Is it out?

Yeah How you want to do a primates after this Yes Matt Is it good Yeah I liked it a lot Fuck yes I loved monkey island And I did see this

that was coming out and I got very excited. Okay, great. I know what I'm doing this weekend. Probably editing this podcast. Nah, I'm going to play video games. Anyway, so they... So they were deliberate. They reckoned.

They were deliberate cuts. How big were these cuts? I had pretty big. Like sword big or like a bigger thing? What answer would you prefer? Wolverine. Like a real big warier. Okay.

Even bigger. Oh, bigger than, like a big Wolverine? Like a bigger Wolverine? Like a bigger Wolverine? Like a saber tooth? See, like a big Wolverine? He's a bigger Wolverine, but his claws are small. smaller.

What? His teeth are bigger. Hmm. Oh. Does they have like warrous tusks? I would have called him to walrus. No, like sabre tooth. Oh, that's any relation?

Yeah. Whatever the most exciting size. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And is it cuts on the outside or inside? Well, I mean, it's on the bow, so it's on the outside. Okay, not the inside of the bow. That's right. The inside of the bow is probably called something else.

They've got a name for freaking every part. Every square foot of the boat's got a different freaking. These freaking name. Oh, I've got to name every part of the boat. What, you can't just point? You can't point the inside bit, the outside bit, and the poop deck. That's all you need. Definitely don't get rid of the poop deck.

Where would I poop? I still don't know what a poop deck is. I don't want to know. Don't at me. I don't care. But you do swab it, don't you? You got to swab it. That's good advice.

Check it. It's good. Oh, okay. It's not to test for COVID. They also discovered stains on one of the ship's ray. and that they thought might have been blood, together with the deep mark possibly caused by an axe. What?

Okay. No signs of violence before. Yeah, that's right. These findings strengthens Flood's belief that human wrongdoing or foul play was the cause of the mysterious disappearance. They asked the first time they're like, any signs of violence, and they just looked at the back,

there was nobody there. Nah. Nah, I can't see any violence. Nah. Now there's axe marks. I'm leading towards some sort of sword axe fight. Oh, yeah. Just people flailing around.

Vikings? Yeah, maybe Vikings, yeah. So you're just on a ship? Like, what if you just dropped an axe one day and like? What if jiblets was there? And his axe. Yeah, giblets. Yeah, I like it.

On January... I do think now that the axe is in play, I'm way back to my theory that the boat was seeking vengeance. It had the axe used on it and it was turning the axe back on to the humans. Yeah. Yeah. Well, he's cracked it wide open. Like an axe.

Thank you, Mesa, for joining us. I'm going to ask someone to clip out just saying, wow, there. I want that to be my morning alarm just to gently be woken up, feeling good. I'm sorry. Wow. Wow. No, you did your best. I'm not having to go on you.

I think you did more than you probably should have been able to do it. Oh, yeah. Yeah, good. On January 22nd, 1873, Flood sent reports to the Board of Trade in London, adding his own conclusions that the crew had gotten at the alcohol and murdered the Briggs family and the ship's officers in a drunken frenzy. They'd cut the boughs to simulate a collision, then fled in the lifeboat to suffer an unknown fate. This is the leaps that Flood has made. He's like, they got into the booze, killed everybody, bailed. He's done some fanfic there.

And he's named for the people they've killed and everything. Probably that guy. Who's to say it wasn't the family that did the killing? The family killed the crew and then they got away in life. No evidence of the family being killed or anybody being killed. Because the boys are just double. The boys are doing double. You know, they're not in their right minds.

They don't have time to murder. They're doing double. They'd be knackered. Maybe it was a combo. Maybe it was some members of the family and some members of the crew killed the remainder of the family and the remainder of the rest. It could have been an alliance struck. I reckon the two-year-old was the one leading everything. Masterminded it, yeah.

Maybe there was a fight over attractive cousins. That's why the family split up because, you know, brother-on-brother action. Not in that way, but they were sort of fighting because... That's my hot cousin. Yeah. Well, it's also my hot cousin. No, because one doesn't really understand how families work. Grab your sword.

Turn the two-year-old's like, you should kill each other. Yeah. Yeah, if you kill each other. Kellam. Kelab. Oh, man, that's now this Stephen King novel is really coming together. The two-year-old. And the haunted boat as well with the, like Christine, the haunted car.

Holy shit. Whatever that car was. There's almost too much good stuff in the script. That'd be the only problem. Oh, not, not for Stephen King. You just bloat that thing. You blowed it up. You just keep it going.

Blot it up. Blot it up. So not only was he throwing accusations around about the crew of the Mary Celeste, Flood also thought that Morehouse and his men were hiding something, specifically that Mary Celeste had been abandoned in a more easterly location and that the log had been docked. Again, they weren't being paid by nautical miles, so I don't really know why.

Yeah, so he's just jumped to this conclusion. Well, he just couldn't accept that Mary Celeste could have travelled so far without a crew. Right. Because he doesn't understand that water moves. James Winchester arrived in Gibraltar on January 15. Remember, he's like one of the main owners of the ship. because he was there to inquire when Mary Celeste might be released to deliver her cargo. They still had cargo to deliver, so he's like, I got a job to do.

I got ice cream on board. Okay? My boys are doing apples. Everybody's doing doubles. Flood demanded a surety of $15,000. Money Winchester did not have. And Winchester became aware that Flood thought Winchester might have deliberately engaged a crew that would kill Briggs and his officers as part of some conspiracy.

Now, what the conspiracy was, do know, but Flood was like, you did it. Sounds like Flood's lost his mind. And it's a lot of fun. A loon wolf. A loon wolf. Is that anything? I don't know, but I'm going to use it.

Okay. I'll use that one. That's yours. Yeah, thanks. On January 29, during a series of sharp exchanges with Flood, Winchester testified to Briggs's high character and insisted that Briggs would not have abandoned the ship except in extremity.

Flood's theories of mutiny and murder received significant setbacks when the scientific analysis of the stains found it on the sword and elsewhere showed that they were not blood. Grape juice. Yeah. It's cut and grapes.

He's like, I reckon they're blood. Murder. It's murder. It's blood everywhere. They're like, no, there isn't. Well, what if there was, though, it makes you think, doesn't it? The stains are green or something? It just has no idea. This society we live in these days, it could have been blood. And that actually says a lot about people in life.

So, don't think about that. You know? These days, Flood would just write a book. You know, every now and then there's like a book on like, what really happened to JFK comes out? And they go on TV and they say, no, this definitely happened. But they've just been in their attic for too long, convinced themselves.

Yeah. This definitely happened. Yeah. I just read my own book back. Yeah. Wow. And it puts it all out in plain English. This guy gets it.

A second blow to flood to flood followed in a report commissioned by Horatio Sprague. Nice. The American consular and Gibraltar. in their view The marks on the bow were not man-made But came from the natural actions Of the sea on the ship's timber So it's just normal marks on the ship

Why is this ship wet? They wet it with blood What the hell? It's wet because they've been cleaning up blood We've had a week of hearings And I think it's time to bring in Somebody who knows something about boats and water Finally do that

That would be good This guy's surname was floods we thought he would know. It's a pretty wet name. He seems like a fucking lunatic. I'm calling him the loon wolf. Looking around, is it catching on? You keep saying it.

No one else is. So they're not even like noteworthy marks. They're just every boat would have similar sort of mark. Yeah, it's just marks. You know, like brushing up against things or... And the same with a sword. It's my bathroom ceiling and abandoned ship

because of all the water marks. I don't like putting the exhaust fan on it's too loud. With nothing concrete to support his suspicions, Flood reluctantly released Mary Celeste from the court's jurisdiction on Feb 25th. And as for the salvage hearings, eventually the salvages received a payment, but only for about 1,700 pound, which was around a sixth of what the vessel was insured for.

And this was far lower than the general expectation. One authority thought that the award should have been twice or even three times that amount, given the level of hazard in bringing the derelict into port. All that fog. Sea serpents. So they're like, what the fun? I'm going to have money.

Have more money for me, please. Come on. This boy was trying to eat us. The boys are doing doubles. You know, they're not even getting any money for. Freakin' hell. I'm in my pocket. I'm freaking hell.

It should be twice that amount money. That boys do doubles. You're paying us for singles. What about my boys? Hey, anything about my boy? They don't double. Look what they've done to my book. Come on what they've done to my boys.

My boys. They've been done so many doubles they don't quadruples now. Come on a side. It's crazy. A double it over. Is the fog a Stephen King thing? Oh, the mist is. It's a mist.

I mean, we can, there's more elements coming. What if the fog in this case is somehow sentient? Oh, and it's friends with the ship? Yeah. Okay, that's great. No cousins. Nice. Attractive cousins of the ship.

Then we can have some romance here as well. No stronger bond. with someone and their attractive cousin. Who's your attractive cousin? Mine's a scientist. Bloody call it foghorn, you know what I mean? Oh, that's hot. A can of roots and stuff.

Fog porn. Oh, there it is. Fog horny. No, no, the one you said first was best. There's several theories of what happened. They all come from flood. All from flood. No, no, from lots of people.

From us? From you. You're going to read out once a week set. We'll see if some of them align with what. we've already said. One theory bandied about in the 19th century was that the crew members drank the alcohol on board and mutiniesed. We kind of heard that earlier.

Nine of the 1,701 barrels in the hold were empty, nine barrels of it. But the empty nine had been recorded as being made of red oak, not white oak, and red oak is known to be more porous and therefore more likely to leak. No. So just those exact nine that were empty

were made of a porous wood which is known to leak. So do with that what you will. It's a bad choice for a barrel. It is a bad choice for a barrel. Yeah, yeah. The white oak was a much better choice. It's a bad choice for one barrel,

let alone nine barrels. You know what I mean? Yeah. That's nine times the trouble. What are they thinking? They weren't. Probably that they'd run out of the other stuff. Yeah.

Excuse me. Oh, I need nine more. Just make another red one. Other theories pointed blame at the German brothers on board. Volkett and Boy Lorenzen. Those German brothers. None of their personal possessions were found on the abandoned ship,

leaving people to believe that they had prior knowledge that they'd be leaving the boat and planned to take all their stuff with them. So maybe they're behind it all. He even took his Game Boy. He never went anywhere without his Game Boy. But a documentarian called Anne McGregor found out that the brothers had lost their possessions at a shipwreck earlier that year. My Game Boy!

He's gone. Which I find kind of funny. It's like they, A, that shipwrecks were so common, but also B, that like they just didn't get anything else. It's like,

well, they're closed on our back. All their stuff. Yeah. Plus, sheds, they had no motive. And there'd also,

there'd be a million reasons why this stuff wasn't there. Yeah. Maybe they, they saw that it was all happening and they escaped first. You know, they got out of, you know,

there's one of a, you know, there's probably another million. I know, it's so, there's just one of the million. Yeah. I could list them all now if you want, but I mean...

It's okay. We probably don't have time, do you. We don't have... Not for a million. Because I'd love to. You could do five. No, I mean, I'd probably don't have time. We've got time for five, I reckon.

Yeah, we've got time for five. So you've got, they saw it happening and when you got their stuff. What else? Yeah. One of them saw it happening and got both of their stuff. Yep. Yep. The other one.

Yeah. All right. Saw it happening and got... That's three. That's three. It's pretty solid. Maybe they had a bet that one of them said, Hey,

Hey, Boz, bet you can't throw all of our stuff overboard. And Boz said, do you just watch? Yep. And then he went, no, I'm a Game Boy. Yeah, yeah. Because he didn't think about it. Yeah, that's four. And then the fifth one is spontaneous combustion.

That's right. That's just five of the million possibilities. There's double-A batteries in the game boys. They were notorious. Suddenly catching fire. You've got to be careful. Not fired. Oh, no, that's the same.

same thing, it's a combustion. Dave, you fool. The main theory for a while was that Captain Morehouse

and the crew of the Degratia had faked the shipwreck to get the salvage payment as Mary Celeste was overinsured. But again, no evidence of this

and again there was no sign of violence or fighting so it seemed very unlikely. And they didn't get much for it. Exactly, so that wouldn't have even paid off. So they got like 1,700 pounds for killing

everybody on the ship. It's not worth it. Not worth it. According to one source I found, museumhack.com. Nice. On top of that, the captains of both ships

had been friends. Briggs was a seasoned semen and well respected in shipping circles. Seasoned salmon. When the digraphia... How do you... Paprika.

Yeah. Of course. I like a little basil, as the American say. Basil over here, of course. When the digratia... Oregano. Origano.

When the Tigrania first spotted the abandoned, I'm still trying to quote this one thing. Paper, as they say, ever they? Paper. Paper. What about nutmeg? Oh, yeah. That makes sense. Yeah.

Craig, they say that funny as well. Oh, Craig's the best of all of them. They're so convinced they're right. It's Craig. Do they call Greg's Greg? Greg. Greg! Love it.

I love it. I love culture. I love cultural differences. I do also. My favorite. I love. We say bucks parties, English say stag-dos, and the Americans say bachelor parties. That's right.

And that's fun? Yeah. I mean, that's something that ties us all together. Yeah, that's right. We all go, woo! Throwing out chuckers. Yeah. So the captains were friends.

You had a quote of some sort. Yes. Captains were friends. When the DiGradia first spotted the abandoned Mary Celeste, Captain Moorehouse was particularly concerned when he realized that the abandon ship belonged to his friend. They may have even shared dinner in New York's Astah House the night before Briggs and the Mary Celeste set sail. When they say May have, a couple of sources said that they did have dinner the night before.

I would say it was lunch. Well, I think that was from Captain Morehouse's wife like 50 years later. So they're like, how credible. I seem to remember him going out for dinner that night. What was that lunch? What was it? Was it somewhere in between? Was it an early dinner?

Elevenses. Mutiny has already come up a couple of times. The idea that piracy was the cause was also discussed at length. However, again, there were no signs of anything being stolen and it was pretty unlikely that pirates would take over a ship just to kill or kidnap everyone and not take any valuable stuff.

Unless they wanted that spyglass in the bionicle. Oh. Was the spyglass taken? Yeah. Could have been a magical spyglass to get to a treasure. The treasure at the center of the Bermuda Triangle. Some sort of Caribbean thing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Genuinely Bermuda Triangle comes up. Yes. As in, that's a theory, even though they were nowhere near it. Oh, my goodness. How big is this triangle? So big. Mutiny also seems unlikely by all contemporary accounts.

Captain Briggs was a competent, fair and rational captain. But mutiny. Mutanty. Oh, my God, Wolverine and the walrus. I think so. And maybe, I reckon the cuts along the bow were probably Cyclops. Because he opens the visor and there's a portal to a dimension of pure kinetic energy. Is that what that is?

He's got a portal in his head? How do we get in there? I don't know. I don't know you want to. He stuck it in as a bed. Jammed it in behind his eyeball. A bit of fun. Jeez, you wake up the next morning going, what have I done?

I won the bet, but what have I lost? At what cost? That rhyme nicely. Enjoyable. Put that on a t-shirt. Just your sad face. What have I lost? At what cost?

Regret face, isn't it? This is good stuff. An anti-gambling catcher. phrase. That walk cost. Is that my wallet, Jason? Do you remember that one? That's my favourite, Andy gambling ad.

Jason, is that my wallet? No, I remember that one. I remember credit card got rejected at the supermarket again. Wow. There's like a mum and a young child, like a trolley full, but she can't pay for it. Tragic. Probably also Jason. You dog.

It might have been Jason as well. My favourite was the one when they're like, yes, I've won. And then it goes, sometimes you win. Yeah, gambling. My favorite ones are all the ones with Ben Russell going. Gambling's great. Do it more. And I do.

Yeah, I say thank you. Every time I see one of those ads. And save you, Michaelides. I put on a little gamble. Thank you. So Captain Briggs has a, he's got a good reputation. So they're like, why would the crew, you know, mutiny? It's one of the reasons why people have been so perplexed by the needless abandoning of the Mary Celeste.

It's doubtful that he would have hired men he didn't know well, especially when traveling with his own wife and daughter on board. And even if there had been a mutiny, why would Briggs's crew abandon the ship after seizing control. But maybe they want to control of the lifeboat. Right. So just take the lifeboat and leave. Yeah. Leave Briggs on the boat.

Oh, now you're questioning the way they do things, Jess? That's exactly what we're doing. That's a bit rich. That's exactly what we're doing. We're trying to figure out what happens. Do they tell you how to do your job? Yeah. Everyone does.

Natural phenomena has also been blamed for the sudden abandonment of the Mary Celeste. The possible appearance of a displaced iceberg. Oh, could explain the cuts on the ship And the polar bear? Maybe. Where the polar bear come from? Holy shit. Just floating around on an iceberg.

Yes. For weeks and it's hungry. Yep. And then sees a ship and it's like, Oh, great. Dinner. I'll eat everybody on there. Uber eats.

Yeah, yeah. I've been waiting ages. I will not be paying full price for this. These guys are barely lukewarm at this point. I should have gone to the shops and got it myself. Hydrographical evidence suggests that an iceberg drifting so far south was improbable. But not. Not impossible.

I was thinking. But other ships would have seen it had there been one. So probably not. Another theory was a submarine earthquake. Okay. Now we're thinking outside the box. But again, I don't really see how that would make them completely abandoned ship and disappear. Hmm.

You know? Unless they're all standing on the edge of the boat at the time. Yeah. Guys, I can see an earthquake happening. Quick, get out of it. Get out of here. Let's check it out. Or if they're taking a group photo

Where they're all balancing across the top beam Oh yeah Like that classic New Yorker one Let's do a silly one Whoa Yeah no hands Oh no Suburine earthquake

We're all off the edge Yeah Except the photographer But you know A photographer goes down with their portraits I'm now wondering if the submariner is involved He might be involved If there's a submariner earthquake

Yeah As just said She said submarine Earthquake Yes What's his first name again. Name or. Name or. Oh yeah, that's good.

No, no, just name. Oh, Matt, you've done it again. You can use that one. He keeps giving you all the good ones. It's just handing them to you. Whoever's editing, please edit all the things I've set out, please. Just turn his mic off. Okay.

Through studying the water temperatures, wind speeds and wind directions at the time, as well as data from the international comprehension, comprehensive ocean atmosphere data sets or I codes nice they work backwards yeah they're like this we're eye codes we've got to make this work icons this sucks

it's a database that stores global marine information from 1784 onwards our acronym sick bros we've got to work backwards from that C international sexy yeah sexy international Okay it's going to be sick bros

because we've got to be C and sexy So yeah, it's a database that stores global marine information and it's used to study climate change. But by looking at that and all the other info about water temperatures, wind speeds, researchers found that the Mary Celeste was about 120 miles west of where Briggs had thought he was, possibly due to a faulty chronometer, a timepiece. So that was like not that long ago. Like a hundred years later they've gone, actually he was here,

not here based on the last sort of note. Is that crazy? The day before the ship was abandoned, it also changed course, perhaps seeking some relief from rough seas. It had been pretty choppy. Let's go to Ibiza, guys. Yeah. No waves there.

Fuck this. This is crazy. Let's just head for a bifah. Not that an experienced sea captain would call for an abandoned ship because the water was a bit choppy. Like, I'm feeling a bit nauseous. Should we just, should we bail? What are you doing?

On its previous voyage, the Mary Celeste had carried coal in her cargo, and had also recently been extensively repaired and renovated. The result may well have been a pump became clogged with coal and sawdust. This would explain why one of the ship's two pumps was found disassembled. Oh, I really hope they packed a chimney sweep for the trip. You got to be able to sort that coal out. Is that what they do? They sweep coal out of chimneys?

Yeah. Yeah. Well, we'll learn next week As the number one topic for Blocktover Next week is chimney sweeps Sure, obviously It's Jim Chimney Swoes Surely, what is cold,

but a big piece of soot So true Yeah, like a solid soot Yeah, solid soot Anyway, chop that output in it in next week You're done, it's easy Sorted Without the pump and with the cargo hole

packed tight Captain Briggs Wouldn't have been able to tell How much water the ship had taken on and we know because of the discovery crew that there was about three and a half feet of water. So with Santa Maria in sight on the date of the last entry of the logbook,

Briggs may have ordered the ship abandoned while he still had the chance to reach land in the lifeboat. So he could have thought that they'd taken on quite a bit of water in the storms that they'd been going through. He didn't have that sort of sounding device where they, it's like a big long stick that they put down into the...

And one was found abandoned on the day. Like a makeshift one. That's right. So if they're not really sure how much water they've taken on and they can see land, it might have felt like the safest option. It's now and ever we've got to, if we're going. If we're going, we're going to be further away. And then if we sink, we're fucked.

But no sign of them has ever been found in the lifeboat. They never made it. Well, we don't know that. Jess hasn't got to the end yet. Never know. And here they are. It's all explained because they said what happened. Thanks to win breeding, we live forever.

We're still alive. Yet another theory focuses on the ship's cargo, those 1,701 barrels of industrial strength alcohol. Oh, industrial strength. The story goes that some of the barrels may have leaked noxious fumes, a theory supported by the nine empty barrels found aboard. These fumes may have built up causing a small explosion, or at least causing the ship's crew and captain to fear an explosion.

Right. Because there wasn't any, surely they'd see signs of an explosion. Well, just wait. Guys, guys, have you heard of explosions? Let's get out of here. The very idea of it. I'm scared. The person who at first said, there's no signs of any violence or fire,

and now we're just finding evidence of everything. There might have been a small thermonuclear detonation in the bowels of the ship. I don't think that, whoever it was, didn't even step aboard? I don't think they looked at the ship. When we said ship, we meant there's one piece. of wood left. There's nothing else. I can't see any signs of violence on it.

If they were for an explosion, it's possible that the captain ordered a temporary evacuation is a precaution to wait until the vapors cleared. Oh, the vapours. I knew it. I knew as I wrote vapors. I was like, this is going to be fun. People then theorised that the lifeboat may have detached

and floated away, leaving them stranded. Oh, no. But also, like, isn't the point, wouldn't you have, like, oars? Like a lifeboat, it doesn't... You know what I mean? Yeah. Name oars.

You can have that Thanks Oh actually I think it was It's not a dingy life boat I think it was like a small ship with sails Oh That's fancy

Like a like a captain's yacht I'm not 100% sure Imagine how fancy you have to be For your little boat on the side To be another yacht It's a pretty big boat And that itself has a dingy It's got a Russian

Russian Got a backup for my backup Russian dinghs Russian dings That'll do Russian... Russian... Russian holes?

Yeah. Like hulls? Sure. And dolls. I like it. Holes. It's not quite eat anything. That's what I like about it.

It's perfect. It's awful. Yeah. It's perfect. That's another t-shirt design. It's awful. It's awful. It's perfect.

I like that. Somebody wants to design those two t-shirts? Please. Send them our way. Again from museumhack.com, there was no visible evidence of a cabin fire. though this still leaves open the possibility of... Of a cabin fire.

We don't know what we're doing here, honestly. This still leaves open the possibility of alcohol fumes that never combusted. Even a cool-headed experienced captain might opt for a temporary evacuation in such a case, especially when his own family was aboard. In fact, one team of scientists put this theory to test back in 2006. An experiment conducted by a scientist at the University College London for a documentary used a replica of the ship and butane gas to simulate an explosion caused by the leaking alcohol. Instead of wooden barrels, they used cubes of paper,

and setting light to the gas caused a huge blast, which sent a ball of flames upwards. But that didn't happen. Just wait, just wait, just wait. Because this is a quote saying, surely the paper cubes would be burned or blackened, or the replica ship would be damaged. But remarkably neither happened.

Whoa. So Dr. Andrea Seller said what we created was a pressure wave type of explosion. There was a spectacular wave of flame, but behind it was relatively cool air. No soot was left behind and there was no burning or scorching. That's because of the chimney sweeps. Yeah, that's right. Get in there. They're quick.

So given all the facts we have, this replicates conditions on board the Mary Celeste. The explosion would have been enough to blow open the hatches and would have been completely terrifying for everyone on board. such a massive explosion could have been triggered by a spark caused when two loose barrels rubbed together or when a careless crewman pipe in mouth opened a hatch to ventilate the hold during the long crossing from New York to Italy

Who are they blaming? I know, brutal. They've just wandered into fantasy there. A couple of crewmen shared a kiss by a fire, maybe that would have caused an explosion. A bit of friction between two bodies. There's a lot of ways that sparks could start. Records show that 300 gallons of alcohol had leaked more than enough to create a terrifying explosion.

It's the most compelling explanation, says Dr. Seller, about their own experiment. Flood said something similar about his. Yeah. Of all those suggested, it fits the facts best and explains why they were so keen to get off the ship. So an explosion that leaves no mark of an explosion. That's cool. Love that. I'm fascinated as to why they used paper cubes instead of barrels.

and gas instead of... Yeah, it feels like, why not just do it exactly the same? I would just like to point out once again that the kinetic energy generated from Cyclops' eyes would in fact cause that pressure away, but no fire because it's not, it's not a laser. It's not a laser. From a dimension of pure kinetic energy.

Could it also have created a spark that blew up the gas from the alcohol? Sure, why not? Pretty crazy, huh? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh my God. Pretty crazy. When you put it like that.

Well, that's, I mean, I'm convinced by that as well, Pop. Yeah, it's, well, very mythbosses. I'm convinced by each thing you say, though. And several other sources lean towards this theory as well, actually. There were other examples of vessels carrying alcohol exploding around a similar kind of time in history. So in his haste to leave the ship before it exploded, Captain Briggs may have failed to properly secure the lifeboat to the tow line. And a sudden breeze could have blown the ship away. from the occupants of their little lifeboat,

leaving them to succumb to the elements. Oh, brutal way to go. Awful way to go. Preferred to explode, probably. Yeah, quicker. Yeah. Many versions of the story have been told in 150 years since the Mary Celeste was found floating in the ocean abandoned.

It's in the big book of stories. It is, of course. Oh, nice, yeah. The Los Angeles Times retold the Mary Celeste story in June of 1883 with invented detail, including every sail was set, the tiller was lashed, fast. Not a rope was out of place.

The fire was burning in the galley. How was the wiki? Or the Pedia? The Wiki and Pedia were fine. Oh, that's right. That's what you want on a ship. The dinner was standing untasted and scarcely cold. The log written up to the hour of her discovery. So it's sort of saying like they've walked on and there's dinner served and it's still warm but there's nobody there. Making it a lot spookier than that was.

Exactly right. In November of 1906, Overland. and Out West magazine reported that Mary Celeste drifted off the Cape Verde Islands some 1,400 nautical miles south of the actual location among many inaccuracies the first mate was a man named Briggs

which is not true and there were live chickens on board the most influential They were dead The most influential retelling According to many commentators was a story in the January 1884 issue of the Corn Hill magazine

And this was an early work of Arthur Conan Doyle, who at the time was a 25-year-old ship surgeon, and his story, Jay Habakkuk-Jepson's statement, was a little liberal with creative license. And terrible at the name of this story. Jay Habakkuk-Jepson. I would have called it Spooky ship. Spooky ship. Arthur Conan Doyle's spooky ship.

I'm reading that, yeah. And there's sex as well, it would say. Yeah. Spooky ship and there's sex. This is a summary of the story from Wikipedia. He renamed the ship Marie Celeste. The captain's name was J.W. Tibbs. The fatal voyage took place in 1873, and it was from Boston to Lisbon.

The vessel carried passengers, among them the titular Jefferson. In the story, a fanatic named Septimus Goring with a hatred of the white race has had... Is that his full name? Septimus Goring with a hatred of the white race? has suborned members of the crew to murder Tibbs and take the vessel to the shores of Western Africa. The rest of the ship's company is killed, save for Jefferson, who is spared because he possesses a magical charm.

So that's one of the most famous interpretations of the story. Wow. By one of those famous writers ever. Wow. And he got it published in Corn Hill Weekly. That's a good get. Can you believe it? Cornhill Mag.

In 1913... I just read that for the articles, actually. In 1913, the Strand magazine provided an alleged survivor's account from one able Fosdyke, supposedly Mary Celeste Stewart. In this version, the crew had gathered on a temporary swimming platform to watch a swimming contest. When the platform suddenly collapsed, all except Fosdike were drowned or eaten by sharks.

Unlike Conan Doyle's story, the magazine proposed this as a serious solution to the mystery, except it was riddled with mistakes and was in fact total bullshit. There were so many stories written that the facts have been a bit lost along the way. Chambers Journal of September 17, 1904, suggests that the entire compliment of Mary Celeste was plucked off one by one by a giant octopus or squid. Oh, yeah. That's pretty sweet. They're like, big squid.

Or octopus. Big squid got him, or octopus, but it was big. And I got one by one Dead Done Solved it That was good Octopus sucker

Sound effect you did there too I've lost it now He got Got in my head We'll go to the tape I don't know what that is Other explanations That was the squid

Probably Yeah They're very different I don't know the difference Other explanations Have suggested Paranormal Intervention Yes

This is what I'm all about An undated edition of the British Journal of Astrology describes the Mary Celeste story as a mystical experience, connecting it with the Great Pyramid of Giza and the Lost Continent of Atlantis. There it is. Yeah, that's the stuff. Two previous topics are rolled up into one. Actually, last block you were on the Atlantic. The city of Atlantis.

That's right, yes. As Mesao alluded to before, the Bermuda Triangle has been in as well. Another previous... What's going on here? Are we at the center of this? Yeah. And then it says that it might have been sucked into a giant cloaca. It's crazy.

Oh my God. Yeah, even though the Mary Celeste was abandoned in a completely different part of the Atlantic, people are like, oh, Bermuda Triagall. The sea's the sea, isn't it? Yeah, it's all the same. It's all pretty fucking spooky, actually. It might have got lost in the triangle and been spat out in a different spot. Yeah.

We don't know. We don't know. Are you telling me that definitely didn't happen? No. Because I'd tell you to fuck. Well, I didn't say it. I said I would in that scenario. But I didn't.

So I wouldn't. Excellent. I certainly would never. Thank you. Similar fantasies have been considered, have considered theories of abduction by aliens in flying sources. But again, very little evidence. What? Oh, no.

There were probably sources on the ship, weren't there? At the dinner table, perhaps. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Could have one of them been there incognito. Yeah, it was actually an alien. So to this day, it remains a mystery. What exactly caused the crew of Mary Celeste to abandon ship and disappear forever? They fell off by accident.

All of them. They fell off on purpose. Okay. That's my guess. They never left and they were hiding there the whole time. In plain sight, maybe. They're still there. They're still there now.

Yeah, they hid too well. They got trapped inside. Does everybody check the barrels? Bodies in the barrels are you thinking? 700 of them. As if you're going to check them all. And they were like the barrels that had leaked out. Yeah, there's nine.

Empty ones. But nine people on the ship. Oh my God. If I've not discounted. Exactly nine people on the ship. Exactly nine people. That's right. I actually can't remember.

It was seven or ten. There was seven and hundred and one. But some were little as well. So the little one's probably two kids to a barrel. Two kids to a barrel. Yeah. Hiding and they're just drinking on that alcohol. That's right.

Having a great little barrel party. Yeah. They got interrupted by these these jerks taking over their ship. Shh. Let's quiet. Let's have a quiet barrel party. I don't want them to join the barrel party. pretend we're not home.

Yeah. It's probably that. And then there's that family dynasty in England, the barrel family. All those weirdos, they live in barrels. Yes. Probably them. We've cracked this case wide open. They only really came to light just after this.

Yeah. Not a coincidence. Can't be a coincidence. That barrel family who loved to party in barrels. It could be a coincidence. Now that I think about it. We have cracked that wide open. The barrelsons.

Incredible. The barrelsons of Barrelshire. Yeah. It's hard to know. Yeah. No, I reckon that's a coincidence. And now that we've done it as a report, within the next few months, there'll be some sort of, you know, conclusive discovery and we'll know what happened.

That's right. The barrelsons will come clean. That's right. It was us all along. We're immortal because of our cousin marrying ways. But for now, that's all we know. And that is my report. Mary Celeste.

Great job. Alcohol also can, doesn't that conserve things or whatever? So if they've all been just... Soaking up that alcohol the whole time That maybe they... There are olives now. Yes, immortal olives. Is it possible?

I hope they're Calamata, my favourite. Oh yeah. I mean... Are you going to eat that? Getting out on a limb there. Oh, my favourite olive is Calamatta. Yeah, they're the best. Yeah, obviously.

People will challenge you. You're kidding. Mesa. I dare you. I don't know. Just the regular. you get a capricotio so whatever they are. Black olives, okay. Okay, Dave was right.

Told you his basic bitches out there. I told you. I was thinking the Calamatta's with the basic bitch one. I hate olives. I hate olives, okay. So that's probably the most basic of bitches. No, I think that's the badass option. Yeah, that's right.

You shun all olives. That's right. I say, no thanks. Not for me. Well, that brings us to everyone's favorite section of the show where we thank some of our fantastic Patreon support. If you want to get involved, you can go to patreon.com slash 2G1Pod. And, you know, if you support us there, you really help keep this show a running.

This show's a running, all right. We're at top speed right now. It's a running, it's a jumping. It's like a real life Michael Chang. That's right. It's a running, it's a jumpin. It's a doing a big ace. Yeah.

You know, serving up a big ace. It's a volleying. That's right. And it's a sliced backhand. That's right. Still only 50 years old now. Still, after all this time The relentless march of time has not

Has not caught up to you, Michael Chair Yeah, geez, I would have guessed older Yeah, I would have thought so too But that's, I mean, it's because it was With us all so early He was butter boy when he won that first championship So if you want to get involved Go along to patreon.com slash 2gonpod

There's a bunch of different levels What are some things you can get there, Bob? You can get three bonus episodes per month You can get access to tickets for live shows, early access. And discounts. And discons. Annually, we do a Christmas card, although you've missed out on that this time. But you can get in early for next year.

And you get to be part of the Facebook group, which is the nicest corner of the internet. Mesa, I think you've done a bonus episode of two, which is still available up there. Maybe one of them we figured out which Marvel characters we were or something. You're on an episode, but we talked about the great molasses flood. I was just thinking about the great molasses flood. Well, yeah, that is a wild, wild story. That was a bonus episode, was it? Yeah, big tub and molasses exploded and covet a city.

Whoa. It was a flood. Of molasses? Of molasses. Okay. No relation. Oh, yeah. No relation.

The first thing we like to do is for people who join up on the Sydney-Shaunberg level or above. They get to give us a fact-quota question. This section is actually called fact-quot or question. Has a little jingle go, something like this. Fact quote or question. And ding. She always remembers the ding. She always remembers the jingle.

And Mesa, thanks so much for hanging around. You're very welcome. Most other guests are cowards and leave. That's right. Mostly because we say, just go. Go about your day. That's right, Cass page. Coward.

Cowardly cast, they call it. Because she leaves before the Patreon read. Some fifth beetle. I would love a beef to develop. There's been two of the nicest people in the world. So we'll get stuck into some of these facts, quotes and questions now. I read out four each week. I don't read them until I read them,

which I know probably makes sense, but that's just pre-apologizing for any pronunciation mistakes I make. This first one comes from Christy P. I believe it's the first time they've been in the fact quote of question section. You also get to give yourself a title. Christy's gone with Keeper of Random Law Enforcement Trivia. Oh. Oh, gosh, I hope we get some now.

Says keeper. Yeah, what if we don't? Well, if they're the keeper of it, I guess they're not going to be the giver of it, are they? That's very true. Yeah, you're right. This is like, I know some great stuff, can't tell you. Yeah, yeah. Wish I could.

Yeah, bad luck. Hands are tight, hammer back with handcuffs. No, Chrissy is offering a fact writing, Hi, guys, thank you for all you do to keep this podcast going. You're welcome. Just as your humor and fascinating stories have kept me going through COVID, cancer, chemo, and more over the last year. Holy shit, Christy.

Hope you're doing okay. I have a few facts that I thought you would enjoy. Though, of course, I'll leave it to Jess to determine if they are fun. I'll decide. Hey, I'll say if they're grim. No, I'm the grim man. You're a dull. You're a dull.

You're the authority on dull facts. I tried to get something interesting. Yeah, but you couldn't even do that because you're so dull. No, I'm really, sorry, Ma'ser. I'm really a dull guy. God, this guy's dull. Thank God. I'm beige.

Personified. So, Chris, you write. Dave Blaniki. Blah. I can do blah facts as well. Yeah, okay. Is that allowed? I think it's very much the same as what you already do.

Darl and blah. I'm trying to expand my portfolio. Okay. Give you something. Jesus. Okay, you can have blur. Yeah, have blar. I'm begging for it.

Yorn folio. These get worse. God, he's good. Christy writes, Hogan's Alley is the name of the mock town at the FBI Academy in Quantico, Virginia, where new agent trainees are faced with realistic scenarios in this urban setting. Hollywood movie set designers were called in to help build the town, which takes its name from a late 1800s comic strip, also called Hogan's Alley. That Hulk Hogan is silent, I assume, and invisible.

This is the comic strip that introduced the world. to The Yellow Kid. Shout out Nick Mason. Holy shit, how weird that? Here he is. The first comic book character, yeah. That is amazing that you got reference in this. No, I get reference a lot.

It's actually not that. Not that crazy. The Bank of Hogan is jokingly referred to as the most Robb bank in the nation. Another of the fake businesses in Hogan's alley is the biograph theater, whose Marquis perpetually announces only one movie showing Manhattan melodrama. Why? Because John Dillinger was gunned down outside Chicago's biographed theater

after watching none other than the gangster flick Manhattan melodrama. Wow. That sounds like a fun fact, but I think we'll have to go to... I agree. It sounds fun. She's got her, she's hovering her thumb. Let me think. A man was gunned down.

Oh, that is fun. That's very fun. No, that's really interesting. That is very fun. I can confirm that's not dull. Okay, yeah. It's not too grim either, although the man was going to do it.

Yeah. But do they have like permanent stuff at the bank and... Oh. Like Disneyland sort of thing. But really they're like a... So they're the actors? Yeah, like a Juilliard trained actor. That's right.

Be the bank teller. Yeah. Hello and welcome to it. Oh! Oh no! Panic button, panic button. Etcester. Thank you very much, Christy.

A fantastic debut. I loved that. Good facts. That was fun. The next one comes from Michael Derizzi. Okay, I was born in 1990, the best year. Agreed. Correct.

And Michael is offering a quote writing, dumps like a truck, truck, truck, size like a what, what, what. Girl, let me see that butt, but, let me see that thong. And that quote was from Cisco. That was perfect. That's funny because I obviously didn't know what it was until right at the end. I think he knew that in writing it. That that is exactly how you'd read it.

Dump's like a what? It's like a truck, truck, truck. I mean, when you say it like that, it sounds ridiculous. Yeah, yeah. He was like, is this some sort of construction worker? What's going on here? It says, P.S., the 90s were a strange. time.

Agreed. Thank you very much for that, Michael. Next one comes from Sophie Shooter. Okay, group mum, I don't care if you think he deserved it. Don't hit your brother. A good point, well made. Sophie, if I could just interject it, Dave did deserve it. Yeah.

He was making funny faces at us. And I gave him a wedgy. And a wet willy. I'm bleeding from both. I have very long nails. We did it at each year. time. Each year at a time? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Sophie's got a suggestion writing. Being lucky enough to have family living in the most beautiful part of my country, South Devon, I have visited the area

every year, even made it down there in 2020. Last year, I did a day trip 180 miles each way, but this year it's looking unlikely, which makes me deeply sad. So my suggestion is to everyone. do whatever you can to get to your happy place. Oh. What if mine's South Devon? Yeah, do what you can to get there then, Dave. I've never been, yeah. We should go there.

Or maybe are we there now? One of more over. We could be, I think, you know, it's, let me tell you, from Bristol, how far it is to drive, which is the closest we're going to get. Because we should go there and have scones the proper way. Cream first. It's an hour and a half. I've driven.

I've never thought about it. I don't know which. one. Well, no, I'm not asking your opinion. I'm saying Devon. I don't have an opinion, Matt. Devin does it right. So Devon, Devon's the home of Devonshire, not, not Devon the, um, the weird manufactured mate. No, yeah, I think that, yeah, I don't know where Devin the weird manufactured meats from, possibly also from Devon. Maybe. Makes some sense. And where did it go? Oh. Devon and sauce sandwiches. Bring it back. Delicious. I've already looked up Matt. Um, Strasbourg, another classic.

On my list to one day get to is Agatha Christie's old house. This guy? This guy, you reckon, is dull? It's an old mansion in Torquay. Beautiful. But I don't think it's on the open on Saturdays and Sundays's in a way there, and I don't think it's going to line up with our schedule. So not this time.

I'm sure you were looking up something else. Why have you come back with that? Why am we coming up? Because that's down that way. Okay, got up. There's only a little bit further on from Devon. Yes. Torquies in that way.

You drifted off. But this will be the third time this year that Dave's in Europe. So I don't, I think you'll get there pretty soon. And none of those of the three trips of I visited tourkey. Yeah. How much do you want it? Oh, it's on my list of things to do. You know, we have a tour key.

Australia's got a tour key. Yeah. It's like a couple hours away, mate. Yeah. She got great surf clothes second shops. Yeah. Doesn't have an, doesn't have a, surf clothes second shops.

It's probably a better way to say that. In the 90s, that's 2000s weird time. Those places were epic. Yeah. When surf brands were all the range. Those outlets. Surf clothes second shops. Yeah.

You know what we're talking about? Like the rip curl out the outlets and stuff like that. Gotcha. Rip curl outlet. I thought you were having a stroke. You want a checkered belt? You get yourself a checker belt there. 100%.

You want last season's rip curl t-shirts? Hell yeah. They're still cool. That's right. Yeah. You want a farting dog t-shirt? Hell yeah, I do. My brother had so many of those.

I found it so funny. I got the best Rip Curl ski jacket one time. It was like Royal Blue up top and then like the Brightest red down the bottom. Matt, we can see. Yeah. Well, I'm for the listening to the time. I'm sweating in here.

Thank you, Sophie, for that inspirational suggestion. Who's nice? Finally, we've got one from Andrew Swibes, aka... Swazzy. Okay, Swabsie. I mean, that's what you should have gone with, Swabsie, but he's going with Senior Junior President of trying to get my partner's topic picked. Okay.

And Swabsie is offered... Oh, we do respond well to bullying. Soabsy's offered a fact writing My partner suggested a topic of the 2003 blackout of the nought It's hard to pick a topic when it's written like that I should mention I don't read these so I read them I mean other May so if you hadn't pre-read the word 2003

How would you know how to No I can't even get the first bit out My partner suggested a topic of the 2003 blackout of the northeast of the US and most of Ontario, Canada. And it would be a wicked report. It all stemmed from a tiny computer issue in, yes, you got it, Akron, Ohio. It's probably the black keys, what, done it. Yes. I kicked a plug out.

Yeah, right. Doing their rock and roll. You know, they like? Yeah, two guys, but geez, they make a big sound. I'm a bloody racket, I'll tell you what. And left 55 million people without power for two days, including New York City. So I just wanted to pump up her suggestion and to get it on your radar. Cheers, you are all the best.

I don't know if that's to you or not. Yeah, no, it is. Yeah. Oh, it is? Okay. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I think we've governed it pretty handily. I know.

That's the problem with you giving us a rundown. I feel like the story's now being told. Yeah. Maybe these colorful characters, though. It's probably colourful characters. Okay. Out in the dark, you know. Yeah.

If so, you'll hear a lot of beeps. If you just heard a lot of beeps while I was talking then, that's because we're about to do the topic. If you didn't hear any beeps, count that as a mini report. Mini, mini, mini. Mini, me. No, good on you. Thank you very much, Swibsy.

Sorry, senior, junior president of trying to get my partners. Topic picked. Could be Blocktober 2023. Who knows? The campaign starts now. Yeah. That's right. It does sound fascinating.

Some people in America will put out for a couple days. All right, so the... Oh, the sassy bitch is back. So the next thing we like to do is shout out to a few of our other great supporters. Jess, you normally come up with a bit of a game based on the topic at hand. Can we name their boat? Oh, yeah. I would love to do that.

Name their ship? Fantastic. Maybe, because maybe the three of us may so, unless you need to need. need our help. Do you want to name all the ships? I was going to say, this sounds like me doing more work, but all right. I would love all your help, but let's see what we can do here. Okay. Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, you can direct it. You can conduct traffic here. Okay, terrific. All right, if I may kick us off, I'd love to thank from address unknown. Can I only assume from the Bermuda Triangle, probably. Probably from the Bermuda Triangle. Yeah. It is Storm McDonald.

Oh, my God. Storm, stay away from my ship. Yeah. Holy shit. That's a great name. Wow. Look, I wouldn't normally set the trend so early, but I would just, if that was your name, I would just call my ship the Storm MacDonald.

Yeah. That is a brilliant ship name. Holy shit. If that's your real name, I mean, even if it's not, fantastic work. Is that a play on Norm MacDonald? Oh, my God. Right? Could it be?

Yeah, that's how we die. That's not a Norm MacDonald wrestler character. That's right. Or is Norm Macdonald a play on Storm McDonald's? Maybe it is, yeah. That makes you think, doesn't it? I'm an overdrive over here. I've got to sit back.

Storm McDonald. Captain of the Storm McDonald. I love that. We're off to a hot start. Are they all going to be in charge of their own shit? Or maybe. It turns out of good their names are. That's the problem though, isn't it?

But the problem is, all our supporters' names are brilliant. And they're all hot. Yeah. Wild coincidence. Next one, the next one is from Born in Cambridge in Great Britain. It's Anarchy Visser. I mean, tell me that's not a brilliant name. That is a brilliant name.

Anarchy Visser. Anarchy. What about like the panicky? Yeah, that's actually very good. Yeah, yeah. It's a panicky goose. Nice. That's very...

It's like a goose that's flustered. And there's something wrong with a motor in it, so it's all jittery the whole time, you know? Very discounted tickets to board the panicky goose. But they do like eight tours a day, so they're actually still doing quite well as a business. It's one of those docked ships that's basically just an English pub. But again, it's all jittery, so all the cutlery and all the... the plates

and yeah it's part of the experience it's a lot of fun it's a lot of alcoholics like going there because they're like well no

that's not me shaking the one is very rude once a day they let an angry goose into the bill

and then everyone she is yeah yeah the goose yeah bloody hell all right

I'd love to thank also from address unknown can only assume from the Bermuda triangle everyone whose

address is unknown you don't get the postcards because you haven't given us an address obviously

anyway I'd love to thank from the Fortress of the Moles in the Bermuda Triangle. It's Travis Sims. Okay, well I'm thinking the Sims. Okay. I'd love to know your process later, but we'll talk about that off air. I think their ship should be called the removed ladder.

My favorite thing to do. In the tradition of the Sims, where you put your Sims in the pool and you take the ladder out and they drown. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Which I think is perfect for a ship as well. Their lifeboat is called woo-hoo. Yeah. That's well.

That's sexy. That's sexy. Oh. That's the sim version of fucking. Oh, really? Woo-hoo. Whoa. And they still, obviously, it's very graphic when they show them woo-hooing.

Yeah, absolutely. Extreme close-ups. It's pornographic. Yeah. Do not play it with your children. Jess, would you like to thank a few of our great supporters? I would love to. I would love to thank again from Address Unknown.

This is getting spooky and mysterious. Yeah, where have all these people gone? Do you think you get a sentence of the people from the boat? We could only assume, yes. Oh, yes. I would love to thank Ryan Brickley. Ryan Brickley's a great name. Yeah, it is.

Okay, anybody got an idea? Oh, the wet brick. The wet brick. You don't want that in a boat. That's right. Brick sink. It's ironic. It's an ironic name.

Because it's the fastest ship on the seven seas. Yeah, I love that. The wet brick. The slippery brick? The slippery brick. Slippery brick. Yes, please. I like that very much.

I like that very much. Thank you, Ryan. All aboard. I'd also love to thank from Rock Hill in South Carolina, Dave Wiley. Oh, Dave Wiley. The coyote. Oh. And the coyote.

The coyote. It has a button next to the word code and you hit that in a house. The wet coyote. The slippery coyote. The slippery coyote. And in brackets, sound of how. Yeah, yeah. That's good.

The slippery coyote. Finally, for me, I would love to thank from Maylands in Western Australia, Emma Vinkovich. Emma Vinkovic. I love that. That's a fucking great name. Such a freaking great name. All these names are so freaking good. The Unsinkovich.

Nice. That's good. That's great, but also dangerous territory. Yeah. But that's all you want. Emma's a badass. You want the thrill of the ocean. Right.

You want to challenge. You want to spit in the fucking. of the ocean. Yeah, Titanic style. To kill you ironically. Yeah, go on. I think you're smart to call your ship's unthinkable. Definitely.

Makes sense. Pride becomes before the fall into the ocean. That's right. Never to be seen again. Thanks so much for your support, Emma. I would like to thank a couple of people if you don't mind. Sure. I'd like to think from, you don't mind?

I don't mind. Thank goodness. From Wellington in New Zealand, Stevie Jepson. Ooh, Stevie Jepson. Little Stevie Jepson. Oh, is that little Stevie Jepson? Oh, is that little Stevie Jepin? Egyptian I see.

I haven't seen you since you were four inches past a quiddly ding. The quidly ding is a good name for a boat. Yeah, I think I was going to call it the Cali Ray, but the quidly dink. The quidly dink. The S.S. the slippery quidly dings. S.S. standing for slippery. That's cute.

I love that. From Wellington and New Zealand, but obviously an expat of Schwabshere or something. No, that was my New Zealand. Oh, that was a New Zealand. That's right. I know. I nailed it. Yeah.

Kiwis are like, I've never actually picked up with Jess as one of us. Well, I'm not, you fools. Yeah. But I'm a masterful actor. I'd love to hear your interpretation of this accent from location unknown. Graham McVeen. Is that little Graham McVean? Little Graham.

McVean, maybe, is there something in the Macveen? Or is there something in the Graham? Okay, so yeah, of course. Ham, like ham, mac, mac and cheese. Mac ham and cheese. Yep. Vien like an oven. Okay, an oven.

A wet oven. Wet oven. Wet, wet mac and cheese. Wet, wet mac and cheese. Wet cheese. The slippery cheese. The slippery cheese. Oh, what's that squeaky cheese?

Oh, Hulumi. Halumi. Yeah. Well, no, the squeaky cheese in brackets Huluomi. Yes. No, it has a button. And you press a button and it's just a person saying, Hulu.

The cheese you're looking for is Hulumi. That's silly. On your little Graham. This might be the best batch of names we've ever had, and we always have great batches. Yeah. And great bitches. Yeah. A lot of pressure on this last one here, David.

Better bring us home strong. Finally from the batch. From Canberra in Australia, it is Daria Sigma. Okay, you've landed that. Darya Sigma, holy shit. That's good. Now, Sigma is like a Greek letter. Yeah.

Is that right? And it also was an old make of Mitsubishi. roundabout in honor of cambra Canberra they got a lot of roundabouts They're known for it What a joy The USS roundabouts

Fireworks and Pornography Yeah It's the only good things Quantico No not Quantico What's their thing With the CASE Q Qistacon

What's Questicon It's like science works But better Oh my God Now I know four things about Cameras This is incredible Although I haven't been to Questicon Since I was about 11

But in my head Still the best place ever Great And I've been to Disneyland Twice You don't know about the mercantile mutual cup from the 90s The Canberra Comets? Well, now I do.

Murph Hughes played there? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Michael Chang ever played there? I don't even know if Chang ever made it. Okay. But didn't, um, who told us recently that, uh, Jackie Chan is from Canberra? Do you know that?

Huh. Is that from or spend a lot of time in Camber? Same, same. He used to be the Prime Minister of Australia. That might explain it. Yeah. Oh, that's why. Went to school there.

Living in the lodge. That's right. right? Yeah, I can't remember who told us that, but what a fun fact that was. Kiribili Howe, so many broken windows and just smash through fridge doors or whatever, because he's always doing his stunts in there. It's always stunting. Always stunting.

Thank you so much to Darya Graham, Stevie, Emma, Dave, Dave, Ryan, Travis, Anarchy and Storm. The last thing we like to do is welcome some people into our Triptitch Club. Only one inductee this week. Now, May so, if you don't know, the Triptage Club is a very special place. Oh, yes. Close your eyes and let me describe it to you. I will not close my eyes, but I will let you describe it to me. There's red velvet everywhere.

Oh, that's great. If you want there to be. Oh, yeah. It's up to you. Okay. Can you picture that? Yeah. Can you picture if you want to?

Red velvet? Yes, yes. But it's basically a club where people who are supporting us on the shoutout level or above for three straight years, they get a one-way ticket to paradise. And that paradise is this club, the Triptage Club. One-way ticket to paradise makes it sound like we kill them. Or sex them? Oh yeah

And once I sex you You die You orgasm forever Until you die It's a real succubous club So I'm on the door I've got the list here It's only got one name on it this week

I'm about to lift a velvet rope And welcome them in Dave's up on the stage He's the hype man He's the MC He's going to bring you in, hype you up The whole crowd is there chanting your name Just behind the bar

You normally come up with a cocktail based on the topic. What's the Mary Celeste cocktail? Yeah, I've got a red rum barrel. Yep. It is leaking. So I'm needing to, I'm filling these glasses quite quickly. It's got Bundaberg red, apparently, is what I have. Yeah, great.

A very smooth version of Bundy rum. And mixing it with, I don't know, your choice of mixer, ginger beer, Coke. You'd have a Bundy and Bundy then? Bundy and Bundy. Bloody hell. That sounds good. Yeah, you could do. Ginger beer, yeah, you're right.

Dave, you normally book a band? I'm also serving I'm also serving Salted meat. I'm not sure. Maybe you both booked a band. Great. Have you booked a band?

You're also serving meat. Salted meat. Oh, salted meat. Okay, yeah. There has been a bit of a mix up. That's not a good recipe. It has been a mix up.

It's two musical artists and they have to perform at the same time. Oh, great. Who is it? On three. Yep. One, two, two, three. Rupert's Ray Jefferson. Wayne Wright.

Oh, that's actually not bad. Rufus May Wainwright. Yeah, that's not very. All right. Uh, fantastic. All right, Dave, are you ready to hype this person up? Oh, so there's one person. They're coming in.

We're giving them a bit of a massage as well to get them hyped up. They're going into a boxing ring. Hold my hand, Dave. We've got this. Thank you, Jess. And obviously, everyone in there and our new inductee, please hang around for the after show with Carly J. Repson and... Rufus Moe Wainwright.

He's so close. Don't worry about it. We'll fix it in place. Yeah, it's fine. Callie J. Repson's playing Golden Plains next year. I'm holding my arm in a weird angle to hold Dave's hand. I need you to get this. All right.

That's right. Please welcome. And if this is your name, please step forward from Penticton in Canada. It's Matthew Bore. Ain't nothing boring about this, Matthew. Yes. He's done it. God, he's good.

See how good that was? That was fantastic. I think it was because I was holding his hand. Yes, I think that's all. Of course. Thank you. Of course. Of course.

Now welcome to stage. Carly, J. Rebson, a Rufususman. Make us at home, Matthew Boer. The two greatest Cali Ray Jepson and Ruez Wainwright tribute acts, there are. That brings us to the end of episodes. Thanks so much for joining us, Mesa. Where can people find you? I have a podcast called The Weekly Planet when we talk about movies and comic books and TV shows.

Such a great show. I think it peaked probably about four or five years ago when I was on an episode. Oh, yep, for sure. But I believe it's still going. But I mean, that was such a high. Yeah. We're just going to write it until the end, I reckon. Yeah.

Yeah. Love the show. It's so good. You and Mayso. Which is you and James. The three of you together. The other Mesa. I like to think if it was the other Mesa.

The third Mesa. You're a fantastic trio, you three. And while I'm listening to you every week. Bob, do we need to tell anyone anything? Yes. That next week concludes. Oh, man. Blockbuster Tofa Grace, Blovember, whatever the fuck this has become.

It's all led to this. It's all led to. We go one more, which is very, very exciting. and then we're back to our regular programming, which means we're taking your suggestions. So if you've got a topic that you've seen a YouTube video on and went, that's interesting. Maybe you were somewhere and the lights went out for two days.

You're like, what that's going on? What the heck? What's going to do some research on this? Don't bother. Just send it to us. Maybe you've got an idea for a movie. Yeah. And you want the shortcut to getting a green lit. Send it our way.

I touch Spielbeg's listening to this. There's a link in the show notes and on our website. dogo onpod.com where you can suggest a topic. You can support us at patreon.com forward slash dogo on pod. And you can find us at dogo on pod across all social media. Maybe a guy won a tennis thing quite early on in his life. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe he's only like in his 50s now.

Yeah. Wow, only just, just hit 50. Yeah. It does sound like a fairy tale. Does, doesn't it? Yeah. Makes you think, doesn't it? There is actually quite a famous match that Michael Chang played.

Really? We could talk about it. I would love to hear about it. Okay, well, put it in that. the hat people. Yeah, put it in if you want to hear

about that famous match, which even could have been that French Open and final. Jess was talking to you put it in the hat if you want to hear it.

This isn't the place to talk about. I'm typing it as we speak. If you could, and it's in. Why, you guys have desk computers now?

Yeah, yeah. We're very well. Yeah, that's incredible. Now, Dave, please boot this baby home. Hey, we'll be back next week

with the number one most requested, most voted for for Blockbust October 2022. But until then, I'll say thank you so much Nick Mason. You're very welcome.

And thank you for everyone at home for listening. We'll be back next week. And until then, goodbye. Bye. Do go on forever. Don't forget to sign up to our tour mailing list so we know where in the world you are and we can come and tell you when we're coming there. Wherever we go, we always hear six months later, oh, you should come to Manchester.

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