Do Go On - 404 - Walter Cronkite

Episode Date: July 19, 2023

Often on Do Go On, we like to tell you about people whose name you probably recognise, but whose life you know little about. This week, we tell you all about 'The Most Trusted Man In America' - Walter Cronkite. This is a comedy/history podcast, the report begins at approximately 05:16 (though as always, we go off on tangents throughout the report).Support the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: patreon.com/DoGoOnPodSubmit a topic idea directly to the hat: dogoonpod.com/suggest-a-topic/ Check out our AACTA nominated web series: http://bit.ly/DGOWebSeries​ Twitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: [e-mail] Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/Who Knew It with Matt Stewart: https://play.acast.com/s/who-knew-it-with-matt-stewart/ Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader ThomasDo Go On acknowledges the traditional owners of the land we record on, the Wurundjeri people, in the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders, past and present.  REFERENCES AND FURTHER READING:https://www.britannica.com/biography/Walter-Cronkitehttps://www.history.com/this-day-in-history/walter-cronkite-retires-from-cbs-evening-newshttps://www.washingtonpost.com/national/did-the-news-media-led-by-walter-cronkite-lose-the-war-in-vietnam/2018/05/25/a5b3e098-495e-11e8-827e-190efaf1f1ee_story.htmlhttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Writing_69thhttps://www.rollingstone.com/tv-movies/tv-movie-features/walter-we-hardly-knew-you-234885 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Just jumping in really quickly at the start of today's episode to tell you about some upcoming opportunities to see us live in the flesh. And you can see us live at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival 2024. We are doing three live podcasts on Sundays at 3.30 at Basement Comedy Club, April 7, 14 and 21. You can get tickets at dogo1pod.com. Matt, you're also doing some shows around the country. That's right. I'm doing shows with Saren Jayamana, who's been on the show before. We're going to be in Perth in January, Adelaide in February, Melbourne through the festival in April, and then Brisbane after that. I'm also doing Who Knew It's in Perth and Adelaide. Details for all that stuff at mattstuartcomedy.com.

We can wait for clean water solutions. Or we can engineer access to clean water. We can acknowledge indigenous cultures. Or we can learn from indigenous voices. We can demand more from the earth. Or we can demand more from ourselves. At York University, we work together to create positive change for a better tomorrow. Join us at yorku.ca slash write the future. Hello and welcome to another episode of Do Go On.

My name is Dave Warnke and as always I'm here with Matt Stewart and Jess Perkins. Hello. Hey Dave, hey Jess, so good to be here. Loving life, loving you and loving you too. Ring-a-ding-ding, I wish I was never born. Oh wow, can I just say how good is it to be here with you? So good. Thanks so much, Dave.

Can you explain to me, because it's been a week since we did this, how does this podcast work? What is it? What's going on? What's my name? Who am I? What is life? Well, I won't tackle the last question until later in the episode.

Before then, I'll say this show is called Do Go On. I'm Matt. You're Jess. She's Dave. I genuinely stopped that. I touched myself. Oh, my Jess. She's Dave. I genuinely stopped that. She genuinely fucked them up. I touched myself. Oh my god, he's losing it.

I went, I'm Matt. I touched myself. Well, let me have another crack at it. I'm Matt. That's Jess. That's Dave. What we do here is we take turns to report on a topic often suggested to us by one of the listeners. We go away.

We do a bit of research. We bring it back to the others in the form of a little old school class report. The other two listen intently as they are regaled with information on a topic brand new to their ears. They actually don't know what the topic is going to be, which is the case for Dave and I or Matt and I, whoever I am now. Oh, my God. Jess, it's your turn to report on a topic this week. Yes. We don't know what you're going to talk about, so we start now. Oh, my God. Jess, it's your turn to report on a topic this week. Yes.

We don't know what you're going to talk about, so we start with a question, which you often forget to write. Well, I remember this time. In fact, I wrote it before I'd even started writing the report. Can you believe it? That's a first. That's a first in 400 episodes. That's personal growth.

Well done. My question is, who was known as the most trusted man in America? The most trusted man? Jeez, most trusted man in America? The most trusted man? Jeez, most trusted man. Who would you trust? In America. A real person? Yes, a real person.

Baskin and all Robins. No, it's not ice cream related. Okay. Well, that's going to rule out my guess. Was it Ben? Choc chip. Oh, okay. Okay.

Isn't that bad? Ethel Merman. Is that an American? I don't know what that- That's the name that came to my mind. Ethel Merman. Yeah. Is it like one of those newsreadery types?

Yes, it is. Oh. Walter Cronkite? Yes, it is Walter Cronkite. I don't know where that came from. That was fantastic. Well done. What did I say?

I went blank there. You went like... So, you were close. I said Ranker or something. Cronkite? Well, none of those were correct. None of those odd sounds you made were correct. The answer is Walter Cronkite.

Walter Cronkite. Yeah, I don't know where I've pulled that from. Because he's the most trusted man in America. Is he the one with the suspenders who leans in and wears glasses? That's Larry. Oh, my God. Larry Bird? Walter Cronkite.

Isn't that a great name? It's such a great name. What could this story possibly be about? I guess Walter Cronkite. It's about Walter Cronkite. It's about the most trusted man. But will he always be trusted? Yeah.

Oh, okay. And this was suggested only by one person. It was suggested by Josh Benfield from Jacksonville, North Carolina. It was voted on by the Patreon. And, in fact, my last report, Charles Kingsford Smith, it was a dead tie between Charlesles kingsford smith and walter cronkite right up until like at some point i was like well i just have to pick one and start writing and after i'd started writing charles kingsford smith got one more vote so it was neck and neck

so i asked the patreons i was like do you want to do a whole new vote or do you want me to do the second one because they were neck and neck and they were like, do the second one. Let's find out what it is. So, here we are. So, the Patreons voted for this one a little while ago, which is very exciting. They've spoken. So, I guess he's probably like America's answer to Peter Hitchener. Well, that's the thing. Do you think he's the American Hitch? I don't think so because I don't think there are modern day equivalents.

Oh. I don't think there have been for a long time. Oh, he's from the olden days. He's not a modern man. He's from the old days. Whoa. Okay. And throughout this, it's like there's no twists and turns and mystery and he hasn't killed anybody or anything crazy.

or anything crazy. But what is interesting about his story is just the fact that as a member of the media and as a newsreader, as a news anchor, he was so loved and, like, influential in some ways, which you just can't connect with in a modern lens. But most people now can probably name one newsreader, maybe. Mal Walden. Right. Sandra Sully.

Oh, that's good. Yep. Tracy Grimshaw. Yep. Jennifer Kite. Jennifer Kite, maybe. Mal Walden. Right. Sandra Sully. Oh, that's good. Yep. Tracy Grimshaw. Yep. Jennifer Kite. Jennifer Kite, yes. Ray Martin. And which of these news channels are you watching every night on television?

Stephen Quartermain. Sports? Sports. Network 10, a fantastic network. Of course. It's interesting that you say that. Anyway, so Walter Leyland Cronkite Jr. Fucking great joke.

Walter Leyland Cronkite Jr., fantastic. Born in St. Joseph, Missouri in November 1916. Son of Walter Sr., a dentist. They lived in Missouri. That's his name? No, that's his job. Walter Sr., a dentist. A.Dentist.

Señor, a dentist. Oh, Spanish. Spanish. He was an only child. The family lived in Missouri until they moved to Texas when Walter Jr. was 10 years old. According to Britannica.com, as a boy, Cronkite was an avid reader of books, magazines, and newspapers.

In 1927, he moved with his family to Houston, where he worked on school newspapers in both middle school and high school. Encyclopedia of World Biography backs this up, saying, during that time, Walter read an article in American Boy magazine. Fuck, that's a fun name, American Boy. Magazine. Magazine. About the adventures of reporting around the world.

It inspired his interest in journalism and he decided when he was in junior high school that he wanted to be a reporter. I've just looked up a photo of him. I recognise him, sort of. Yeah. But it's not who I was picturing at all. I don't know who I thought it was. I thought he was a modern guy.

Nah. He's got a great little mo. You're picturing Larry King. No, yeah, Larry King. But I think I'm picturing another guy as well, which it doesn't matter. It doesn't, because it's not relevant to this report about walter crockett news i'm looking up usa newsman shepherd smith do you know him shep shep don't know shep he's like it's it would be a um still a very well-known name in american particular yeah but why do why have we heard of it? Because I'll get to it. Okay.

I've literally just said he was born. Why are you talking about this? We'll never know. Jess, I need you to give me the crux of it. Give me the crux of Cronkite. We will get there. And I guess that was the other thing. So, Charles Kingsford Smith was a name I knew,

but I didn't know any of the story, right? And I think Walter Cronkite's probably similar, definitely to me, but also probably to a lot of Americans in a similar age bracket to us who didn't necessarily grow up watching him. But it's a name you know, but not necessarily a story. So, hopefully this is interesting. Patreon's voted for it. Put that caveat in there. You wanted this.

You wanted this, you asked for it, and I am being very kind in delivering it. He led quite an active youth. He was a Boy Scout, a track athlete, and participated in student government. And after graduating high school in 1933, he studied at the University of Texas in Austin, where he studied political science, economics, and journalism, and of course worked on the student newspaper there, The Daily Texan. To help pay his tuition, he took a part-time job working

as a correspondent for a Houston newspaper, The Houston Post. In fact, his work outside of university started to take off and in 1935 he dropped out of college to concentrate on journalism, which is kind of fun to be like he's studying journalism and he drops out because he's already working as a journalist. Yeah, there's probably not that many degrees you can do that in. Yeah, nursing. Yeah.

I'll figure it out. I'm just going to go full time. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. There's probably, I mean, yeah, a lot of the arts ones probably. Yeah, I suppose. You can learn on the job. Yeah, but you're obviously going to get practical stuff.

Brain surgery, you probably should. I've got this. Hit the books. I've actually been paid to do this on the weekend, so I might as well just do it all this time. I'm just going to keep doing it. I think I was thinking of young Dan Rather, who was born in 1931.

Who took over after him. Yes. That's why I've confused the two. Dan Rather comes up a little bit. Dan Rather. You spent like five minutes trying to find that out. Yeah, he's missed everything so far. Do you know anything Jess has said so far?

Yeah, university. Yep. Stay weird. We're in Austin. Yep, that's missed everything so far. Do you know anything Jess has said so far? Yeah, university. Yep. Stay weird. We're in Austin. Yep, that's right. He's nailed it. Huh, he can multitask. Well, I didn't think you had it in you.

Well done. So he worked at the Houston Post. He moved into the world of broadcast journalism as a radio announcer for WKY in Oklahoma City. He bounced around a bit in those early years working all over the place. And while he was working as a sports announcer for KCMO in Kansas City, he met Mary Elizabeth Maxwell, or Betsy, to her friends. And the two would go on to marry in 1940, a marriage that lasted 65 years.

Ooh, that's good. That's nice. But then after 65, what happened? One of them cheat. She went on a root rampage. Betsy, baby! a root rampage. Betsy, baby. Root rampage. She was rooting, she was tooting.

Getting a bit silly. Anyways. That's beyond the diamond. 65th anniversary, blue sapphire anniversary. Oh, my God. And is there any more than that? I don't think many get to the blue sapphire. My grandparents got to 70-something, I think.

70 is platinum. Wow. Yep, they got to platinum. 80th is oak. Oh, come on. We're going back to wood? Well, because I guess, like, platinum's, like, the sturdiest metal, isn't it? For jewellery and shit.

So, surely you put that towards the end like 70 and then nobody's getting to 80 who's getting to 80 yeah i mean yeah they just make it an oak oak because you're a tree at that point i don't know what that means but i think it's fitting honestly if isn't the jewelers given up at that point yeah you can really milk them for a bit more, you know. Yeah. Two gold rings. Oh, fuck. Plenonium. Just make something up. Make it up.

Whatever. It cost 80 grand. A thousand per year of your love. Pay it to me now. Per year of your love. Can you put a price on your love? Can you? Can you, sir?

80 grand. Sorry, he can't hear me. Can you put a price on your love? Well, you'd have to have married at 18 and both made it to nearly 100. But I reckon that would have been done. Longest wedding. Matt, you've got the laptop over and you look like you're looking yourself up. Longest marriage.

Longest marriage. Longest wedding in top weeks. Just say I do. I won't. I won't tell you this. Longest wedding, 70 metres. Don't even know what that means. Longest marriage.

Yes, longest marriage. I'd love to know. Yeah, you're right. I mean, people get married before 18. It's true, yeah. Oh, Guinness World Records has got something here. Of course they do. They've got something on everything. Trustworthy of my life.

Would you? I would. I would, and if I were you. What's the most trustworthy publication? The longest marriage ever is that of David Jacob Hiller, born 20th of October 1789, died 7th of July 1899. Why are you giving me this information? And Sarah Davy Hiller, born 1792, so 1898,

who were married for 88 years and 349 days. Oh. That's great. And then she went on a roof. They knew it. 49 days. Oh. That's great.

And then she went on a roof. They nearly- That's where the oak comes from. They nearly made it to 89 years. Yes, I was so close to 89. Were they married when they were, like, one? So, wait. This is the 1700s. They were probably married at 12 or something.

Yeah, honestly, yeah, it could have been. So, Mrs. Heller passed away in 98. But still back then, to live that long is, freakish yeah good on them now you get like people i saw an episode of um you can't ask that of like people over 100 and they like some of them were so switched on i was like i think i like you feel like 100 you just like just like like a bag of bones or something. They were all up and about. A bag of bones. You can't ask that. Are you just a bag of bones?

That was my question. They deemed it a bit too offensive. Even for you can't ask this. You can't ask that. No, you actually cannot ask that. That's a bit crotchety. Oi, bag of bones. How do you actually cannot ask that. That's a bit crotchety. Oh, you bag of bones. How do you actually feel in that meat sack?

Anyway, we've got a lot of topics. I think it depends on the person, right, as well. Of course. Because I'm very good for my old age, 400, 500 years. Absolutely. Most 500-year-old people look like dog shit. Absolutely. But you look like, you look good.

For my age. You're more than, you're a bag of bones and a half, if you know what I mean. Yeah. Thank you so much. I don't know what he means, and I don't want it to last. Double bag my bones. Double bag.

I'm going to move on. So, yeah, we're talking about Walter Cronkite. Walter Cronkite. Walter Cronkite. And Betsy getting married. Betsy got married. 1940, was it? Yeah, I just don't really talk much more about her or their family. Is it because of what she did?

Yeah, because of the route tour. Rampage. We're going on a route tour, stopping all stations. Route, route. I think it's going to be abundantly clear to the listeners that it's late in the day and we've already recorded an episode today and we're losing our freaking minds. And Jess said, this one's a bit dry. Please be a bit looser.

I should stop asking. We're really taking that for a walk already. But if I don't say it, you guys sit there quietly and politely and I get through my report in 36 minutes. I've also been sipping on a coffee. So I'm feeling wired. Anyway, while he's in Kansas City, he also joins

the news agency United Press International who were his main employers for the next few years. Now, this part, I really liked this. It grabbed my attention. It's from this great journalism website, wikipedia.org. Oh, wow. Does W stand for Walter Cronkite?

That's right, yes. And the K stand for Cronkite? Yep. Walter E Cronkite Epedia. It's beautiful. Is his middle name E? It's Leyland. Yeah. Yeah, great. Walter E. Cronkite, Epedia. It's beautiful. Is his middle name E? It's Leyland. Yeah.

Yeah, great. Close enough. So, this is from Wikipedia. With his name now established, he received a job offer from Edward R. Murrow at CBS News to join the Murrow Boys, which was a team of war correspondents. Send in the Murrow Boys. Correspondence. Send in the Murrow Boys.

CBS offered Cronkite $125 a week, which in 2020 money is $2,200 a week, along with a commercial fee amounting to $25, which is another $447. So he'd be making like close to three grand a week. He's cashed up. It's still- Yeah, this is an early job. Yeah. The Barrow Boys. A week. Yeah, this is an early job. Yeah. The Barrow Boys. Barrow. Up to that point, he'd been making about $57 a week,

so it's about $1,000 at United Press, but he had reservations about broadcasting. He initially accepted the offer, and when he informed his boss, Harrison Salisbury, UP countered with a raise, and then Hugh Bailey, the head of the United Press Also offered him a raise on top of that And he ended up just deciding

To stay on at United Press Rather than taking the sweet sweet cash Over at CBS And that was a move which angered Murrow And drove a wedge between them that would last for years You don't want to piss off the Murrow boys Well the head of the Murrow boys is the Murrow man Mr Murrow Murrow boys Well the head of the Murrow boys The Murrow man Oh the one Murrow man

Mr Murrow Mr Murrow Murrow man Right so He stayed put For a bit more cash For yeah But it was still like

I think it was still less Than what he was Offered But he He was like Oh I'm not sure about broadcasting Which is kind of funny Given

His future Is it Is it kind of like a No one ever says No to the Murrow boys Probably Oh my gosh Something like that We offered you a lot of money And I was embarrassed When you said no future is it is it kind of like a no one ever says no to the murrow boys probably oh my god something like that we offered you a lot of money and i was embarrassed when you said no anyway so he soon headed overseas to cover world war ii for united press he was on board the uss

texas through her service off the coast of north africa as part of operation torch and i loved this again it's from um wikipedia on the return trip Cronkite was flown off Texas in one of her Vought Kingfisher aircraft when Norfolk was within flying distance. He was granted permission to be flown the rest of the distance to Norfolk so that he could outpace a rival correspondent on a different ship, the USS Massachusetts, to return to the US and to issue the first uncensored news report to be published about Operation Torch.

So, it was a race to like be the first to- This happens a lot. They have to be the first to report on a story. So, he's like, get me off the boat. I can see land. Fly me over there. I got to get there first. Wow. It's such an interesting thing, like how they've made the sort of gamified information.

We got to be the first to get the- I don't know if I'm using gamified correctly. It feels that, yeah. I learned that off a listener when they asked us a question a while ago on this show. I'd never heard it before. But anyway, it is funny that it's like, yeah, we're in this for the right reasons. Yeah. Being the first to tell everyone the thing we saw.

Being right. Like, that happens a bit as well where others are reporting, like, are reporting something's happened, but they hold off and it turns out it hasn't happened and then they get to be smug that they didn't jump the gun. They do that a lot as well. It's very interesting. But there's a reason they call it news. Am I right? Yeah, why is that?

Well, they don't call it old. They say old news, though, so. Exactly. And old news doesn't sell. If you're on a boat and the guy's flying over you with a plane, you're like, fuck. You're being so Channel 10 right now. Yeah. Yeah, the king of news.

Check it out. Who hosts the 10 News? Jennifer Kite Jennifer Kite? Yeah Holy shit And Stephen Quartermain is doing sport Jennifer Kite

I didn't She's been on the top of the game for so long 10 News first absolutely Must be tough Jennifer Kite I know Jess is it too late to do a report about Jennifer Kite? It is actually yeah

Okay let's just check in I think it would have been rude not to ask Oh absolutely But it is unfortunately a it too late to do a report about Jennifer Cot? It is, actually, yeah. Okay, let's just check in. I think it would have been rude not to ask. Oh, absolutely, but it is, unfortunately, a bit too late. Okay. If you'd asked 30 seconds earlier, I could have done it, but unfortunately- You're good, but you're not that good. Yeah. I feel like I remember Jennifer Cot from childhood.

Yeah, she's been around for yonks. What a legend. I can't believe she's back on top. You know who else is on top? Walter Cronkite. Is he? Well, his experience on board Texas really established him as a war correspondent, and he became one of the top American reporters in World War II. Really?

And that was one of the big wars. It was one of the big ones. Subsequently, he was one of eight journalists selected by the United States Air Force to fly bombing raids over Germany. Why didn't they just get pilots? A great question. This was all part of a group called the Writing 69th. Couldn't figure out what the relevance there is, but it's called the Writing 69th. So, it was a group of journalists that were essentially, they were flying with, they were accompanying members

of a particular wing of the Air Force so they could then write about, you know, what's happening. Yeah, we're up in the air. Dropped a bomb, went boom. It's real windy up here. I'm cold. The group were required to undergo a rigorous training course in just one week.

They trained in a multitude of tasks, including how to shoot weapons, despite rules barring non-combatants from carrying a weapon. They were also trained in how to adjust to high altitudes, parachuting. How to steal someone's weapon. How to steal a weapon. Parachuting and enemy identification. Their training was to prepare them to accompany the 8th Air Force on bombing missions over Germany.

And their first and last mission was on February 26, 1943. That sounds ominous. Of the eight journalists who comprised the riding 69th, only six went on that fateful mission and Cronkite was one of them. Overcast skies meant the original plan to bomb an aircraft factory was abandoned and instead they planned to bomb my mortal enemy of the sea submarines unfortunately while flying over oldenburg germany the american bomber group encountered german fighters the plane that new york times correspondent robert post was in was shot and exploded mid-air

post and eight air force crew members were killed and the other aircrafts returned safely though some had suffered some pretty bad damage. Post-death effectively ended the days of reporters flying on bombing missions. So, they'd gone to all that effort to train them all up. They went on one mission. They went, that's a really bad idea. What were we thinking? Why would we send innocent journalists up there?

Poor innocent journalists. What they should have done is, personally, what I think they should have done, instead of training up journalists to be pilots, they should have trained the pilots to be journalists. Yeah. Yeah. Teach them shorthand. Yes. You know, a quick photography course.

Yep. This is a typewriter. It's honestly, I've got a degree in it. It's not that hard. Yeah. I reckon you could do it in a week. You probably could. Much easier than learning how to be a fighter pilot.

Yeah, because they were doing every part of it. And it's war. So, you don't- I mean, like, are you caring that much about some of the media ethics? Are you caring about defamation? But there is like- There's that old spoken rule that if you're in the army, you're not allowed to hold a pen. Oh.

I didn't know that one. He's not allowed to hold a gun. They're not allowed to hold a pen. So, I didn't know that one. He's not allowed to hold a gun, they're not allowed to hold a pen, so it's really difficult between the two. That's true. But they still didn't teach him how to use a pen. Yeah, yeah, but you just can't have a pen. You can't have a pen. Whoa, whoa, we'll train you.

Just in case you get a pen at some point, there's a user. It's one click for on, one click for off. All right, Q. We'll go over that again. I'm sorry, I was a bit quick for some people it's okay was that the right bond character though yeah okay it was one of the letters so two other reporters denton scott and paul manning who both missed the uh the first raid did fly after this mission but it was not nearly as widespread as it might have been had post not been killed so

they were sort of like this is a great idea this is going to be a thing we do heaps. And then immediately one of their journalists gets killed and they're like, oh, nah, we're not doing that. Post-war, he stayed on in Europe covering the Nuremberg- Sorry, Post? No, just after the war. After the war, sorry. After the war, he stayed on in Europe covering the Nuremberg trials

and serving as the main reporter in Moscow from 46 to 48. So he spent a bit of time in Europe. But to cover the Nuremberg trials, they had to do a week short course of international war law. Yes, that's right. They had to be qualified as barristers or whatever they call them. Yeah, war barristers. War barristers.

Lawyers. Ah, yeah. You know, you shoot your shot sometimes. A lot of swings, a lot of misses. A lot of misses. More swings to come. Having returned to the US and a stint as a radio broadcaster in the Midwest, in 1950 Cronkite joined CBS News.

I included the next sentence purely because I love old-timey show titles. He originally served as anchor of the network's 15-minute late Sunday evening newscast, Up to the Minute, which followed What's My Line? Oh, yeah. There's a lot of really fun old show titles in here, and it's a lot of fun. How would it sound, Jess, if the announcer was just about

to introduce the audience to the show, Up to the Minute? Okay. I can't get low enough to do a good like rolling ladies can you do one of those i thought it was gonna be more like ladies and gentlemen you know more like yeah please welcome to the church walter crumpet for up to the minute that might be a that's very good i'm overdosing on helium in this booth. Cut that, jetties. That sort of stuff. But that was more wartime, I guess.

Yeah. It's 1950. The war's over. War's over. Move on. There's no more war. Honestly, I'm sick and tired of people getting bogged down in this war. It's done.

Yep. Okay. Yeah. The war was run. The war was won. Move on. We're doing game shows now. Up to the minute. Yeah. The war was run. The war was won. Move on. We're doing game shows now. Up to the minute.

Yeah. Whose line is it? Yep. Let's find out together. But let's just shut the fuck up about the war. The war's done. Okay. Don't mention it anymore.

It's annoying. All right. Who wants to play? That's the long intro. Yeah. He's losing it. Come on, Walter. A lot of people, of course, know Walter to play? That's the long intro. Yeah, he's losing it. Come on, Walter. A lot of people, of course, know Walter Cronkite as a news anchor,

and we'll get to that shortly. But before that, he worked on a bunch of different and unexpected shows. And again, because I love old show titles so much, I'm going to tell you about a few of them. From 1953 to 1957, Cronkite hosted the CBS program You Were There. You Were There? You Are There. I'm there? You are there. I'm here.

You are there. Yeah, yeah. Thank you and good night. Which reenacted historical events using the format of a news report. His famous last line of these programs was, what sort of day was it? A day like all days, filled with those events that alter and illuminate our times.

And you were there. I'm in. I love it. days filled with those events that alter and illuminate our times. And you were there. I'm in. I love it. I thought that sounded dog shit at first, but now I want to watch it. Can I get the box set? Yes. I've already ordered it for you.

In 1957, he began hosting The 20th Century, a documentary series about important historical events. Oh, no, they're going to mention the war. I don't want to have to say it again. A long-running hit, the show was renamed The 21st Century in 1967 with Cronkite hosting speculative reporting of the future. How does that jump the gun, then? Well, we've run out of time, so let's just guess what's going to happen. That ran for another three years of them just speculating

what the future was going to hold. Did they get many things right? I don't know. Cronkite also hosted It's News to Me, a game show based on news events. During the presidential elections of 52 and 56, Cronkite hosted the CBS News discussion series Pick the Winner. This is another anecdote I liked that I read. Another of his network assignments was The Morning Show,

CBS's short-lived challenge to NBC's Today. His on-air duties included interviewing guests and chatting with a lion puppet named Charlemagne about the news. About the news. It's all his news base with him. It feels like TV has reverse jumped the shark. They did all these weird things at first, right? Doesn't that feel like they're losing their mind?

Yeah. We're dropping in ratings. What do we do? Cast Stefanovic. We need a new sidekick for him. What about a lion puppet? Yeah. Okay.

He can talk to the lion puppet about the news. Are you okay? Wouldn't you be like- If it worked for Cronkite, it'll work for Stefanovic. It's so good. He considered this discourse with a puppet as one of the highlights of the show. Well, that does not bode well. One of the highlights of his career.

Me too. He added, a puppet can render opinions on people and things that a human commentator would not feel free to utter. Oh, wow. It's an edgy puppet. and things that a human commentator would not feel free to utter. Oh, wow. It's an edgy puppet. Same things that we're all thinking. I was and I am proud of it, he said. You can't say that, puppet. Oh, he did.

I love this. It shows a little bit about his character. Cronkite also angered the R.J. Reynolds Tobacco Company, the show's sponsor, by grammatically correcting its advertising slogan. the show's sponsor, by grammatically correcting its advertising slogan. Instead of saying, Winston's tastes good like a cigarette should, verbatim, he substituted as for like. So, Winston's tastes good as a cigarette should. He was like, that's incorrect.

I'm going to be saying something different. Hey, that puppet sounds like a lot of fun. That's Cronkite, not the puppet Oh, oh my god I thought only the puppet could say the things that we were all thinking That were so edgy But in 1962, Cronkite took over the role of Anchorman For CBS's nightly feature newscast The show was tentatively renamed Walter Cronkite with The News

But later just The CBS Evening News Imagine that, they're like, sorry Walt We've got to take your name out of the title. Well, originally the news was only like 15 minutes long. It was just a pretty short broadcast. And that was mainly puppet chat. And it was in 63 when the show was expanded from 15 to 30 minutes, making Cronkite the anchor of American Network TV's first nightly half-hour news program.

There you go. And that invented the half-hour news program. There you go. And that invented the half-hour nightly news, did it? Pioneered it. Yeah, invented is a stretch. Cronkite's tenure as anchor of the CBS Evening News made him an icon in television. During the early years as anchor, Cronkite's main competition was NBC's The Huntley Brinkley Report, anchored by Chet Huntley and David Brinkley. Yeah, you can't have two Lees. Huntley Brinkley Report, anchored by Chet Huntley and David Brinkley. Yeah, you can't have two Lees.

Huntley Brinkley. No, it doesn't work. No. It's hard in my mind. Huntley Brinkley. I don't like it. All right, Hunters, come in here. You're Hunters now, okay?

Hunters and Brinkley. That works. That's better. Okay? That is better. Hunter and Brinkley, maybe. Hunter and Brinkley, sure. Brinkley Hunter.

No, Hunter and Brinkley. Anyway. Hunter and Brinkley, sure. Brinkley Hunter. No, Hunter and Brinkley. Anyway, their program had a much bigger audience, but a few key world events were about to happen that would see Cronkite breeze past them. Oh my gosh. Was he going to, like, cut their brakes or something?

Yeah. We can wait for clean water solutions. Or we can engineer access to clean water. We can acknowledge Yeah. We work together to create positive change for a better tomorrow. Join us at yorku.ca slash write the future. So, okay, a few things happen in, this is the early 60s, a few things are coming up in the next 20 or so years. Okay. It better not be a bloody war. Yeah, I'm sick of these fricking wars.

Okay. I'm going to have to snip out a good chunk of this report. Now, look, when discussing the events of November 22nd, 1963, does that ring a bell to you at all, Dave? November 22nd, 1963. It absolutely does, I'm afraid. A certain assassination. That's right.

Basically, every documentary you see will show footage of Walter Cronkite breaking the news that President John F. Kennedy had died. That might be where you kind of recognise him from. Cronkite had been standing at the United Press International Wire machine in the CBS newsroom as the bulletin of the president's shooting broke and he clamoured to get on air to break the news as, again, he wanted CBS to be the first. And it's really a pretty amazing effort by everyone, actually.

There was no camera in the studio. CBS didn't own a camera yet. They had one, but it was being used elsewhere. Like, you know, which is crazy now. Yeah, of course now you just have one locked off all the time. I reckon if there was breaking news, we could jump downstairs and be, like, on air now, you know, and we're not in a TV station. Yeah, I mean, we could do it on our phones.

Well, that's actually very true. But, yeah, so their camera isn't ready. They have to go retrieve it from somewhere else and then they take ages to set up. So they're trying to get everything set up. Cronkite instead goes into one of their radio booths to report the events and then the audio is played on TV. So CBS was 10 minutes into its live broadcast of a soap opera, As the World Turns, a live

soap opera. So, they're performing it live on TV. That's fun. Amazing. Bring that back. As the World Turns, which had begun at the very minute of the shooting. And a CBS News bulletin- Do you think they're connected?

Oh, my God. Oh, my gosh. There are no coincidences. Holy shit. Yeah. Oh, my God. Oh, my gosh. There are no coincidences. Holy shit. Yeah. Oh, my God. I think we've just cracked this case wide open. Yeah, this goes all the way to the top.

The president. As time goes by, what's it called? As the world turns, Dave. As the world turns. Fuck. So, just like a title card, CBS News Bulletin sort of slides into the broadcast. Which they would literally do by hand. Yeah, probably.

In front of the lens while people are still acting behind it. They're like, what the fuck's happening? And then Cronkite's voice is being heard as he's recording these things in a radio booth. So, his first one is, here is a bulletin from CBS News. In Dallas, Texas, three shots were fired at President Kennedy's motorcade in downtown Dallas. First reports say that President Kennedy has been seriously wounded by this shooting.

And I'm sorry, we should also say Dave's done an entire two-part report on this very topic. So, none of this should, you know, it's not a spoiler. He pretty famously died, but also you can go listen to that whole thing. Right, but Walt was the first or was one of the people breaking the news to America. That's right. He was a bit noncommittal.

He wasn't owning it. He was saying, report saying. Exactly. That's what I'm talking about with before, where they don't want to. And this happens a lot with this exact story. Just before the bulletin cut out, a CBS News staffer was heard saying Connolly too, apparently having just heard the news that Texas Governor John Connolly had also been shot while riding in the presidential limousine.

Then CBS went back to the telecast of As the World Turns, which gets interrupted a few more times. Do they just do like a Space Jump style freeze? I don't know what they do. I think they're sort of going to like their regular ad breaks and stuff as well. But in between news updates, there's just a live soap opera happening. Because, yeah, wild.

If something happened now and when stuff does happen, a news reporter will just pop up and be like, we're interrupting because of breaking news. But they don't have the camera set up. They don't have, like they can't do that. It's amazing. So the cast continued to perform live while Cronkite's bulletins broke into the broadcast, unaware of the unfolding events in Dallas.

So that answers your question. Yeah, they're still performing, but nobody's watching them. Oh, that's so sad. Isn't it? Cronkite is just in the radio booth delivering news updates as they get them. And then at 2pm he told the audience that there would be a brief pause so that all of CBS's affiliates, including those in the Mountain and Pacific time zones, which were not on the same schedule,

could join the network. So they're putting them all together at one. He then left the radio booth and went to the anchor desk in the newsroom from Wikipedia. Within 20 seconds of the announcement, every CBS affiliate except Dallas's KRLD, which was providing local coverage, was airing the network's feed. KRLD, which was providing local coverage, was airing the network's feed. The camera was finally operational by this time and enabled the audience to see Cronkite, who was clad in a shirt and tie but without his suit coat, given the urgent nature of the story.

He didn't have time to grab his coat, so he's just in a shirt he's unheard of. The whole country is watching Cronkite. Wow. Every affiliate's on him now. is watching Cronkite. Wow. Every affiliate's on him now. After a few minutes of broadcast, Cronkite threw to KRLD news director Eddie Barker at the Dallas trademark where Kennedy was supposed

to be making a speech before he was shot. Barker relayed information that Kennedy's condition was extremely critical. Then after a prayer for Kennedy, Barker quoted an unofficial report that the president was dead but stressed it was not confirmed. Coverage came back to Cronkite who report that the president was dead, but stressed it was not confirmed. Coverage came back to Cronkite, who reported that the president had been given blood transfusions and two priests had been called into the room. He also played an audio report from KRLD that someone had been arrested in the assassination attempt at the Texas School Book Depository.

Back in Dallas, Barker announced another report of the death of the president, mentioning that it came from a reliable source. Before the networks left KRLD's feed for good, Barker first announced, then retracted, a confirmation of Kennedy's death. So he's sort of like, he's going a bit rogue and just being like, yeah, he's dead or not. I don't know. He's definitely dead.

No, he's not. He's not dead. That seems so funny to even be like, I can't confirm, but there's reports he's dead. So I would confirm it and then report it. But he might not be dead. Can't confirm that either. But again, do you think it's just like wanting to be the best?

Yeah, it's so competitive that they forget what they're really there to do. Yeah. And that is to serve the news. Information is king. But if you go, there's two possibilities. He's either dead or alive. So, I haven't technically got it wrong either way. Well, one way is wrong, but the other is king. But if you go, there's two possibilities, he's either dead or alive. So, I haven't technically got it wrong either way. Well, one way is wrong, but the other is right.

So, I am right. Good night. Frodingers Kennedy. Wow. Makes you think. Does. CBS cut back to Cronkite reporting that one of the priests had administered last rites to the president. In the next few minutes, several more bulletins reporting that Kennedy had died were given to Cronkite, including one from CBS's own correspondent, Dan Rather,

that had been reported as confirmation of Kennedy's demise by CBS radio. So CBS radio is calling it, others are calling it. As these bulletins came into the newsroom, it was becoming clearer that Kennedy had in fact lost his life. Cronkite, however, stressed that these bulletins were simply reports and not any official confirmation of the president's condition. Some of his colleagues recounted in 2013 that his early career as a wire service reporter taught him to wait for official word before reporting a story. He's a true journalist.

Thank God there's one of them left. Then there's that famous footage that's used every single time you watch anything JFK related. At 2.38pm, Cronkite was handed a news bulletin. After looking it over for a moment, he took off his glasses and made the official announcement. From Dallas, Texas, the flash apparently official, he's reading a piece of paper,

President Kennedy died at 1pm Central Standard Time, and then he looks up at the clock, 2 o'clock Eastern Standard Time, some 38 minutes ago. After making the announcement, Cronkite paused briefly, put his glasses back on and swallowed hard to maintain his composure. And that's why it's quite famous footage because he's, like, quite obviously affected by it. With noticeable emotion in his voice, he said,

Vice President Johnson has left the hospital in Dallas, but we do not know to where he has proceeded. Presumably, he will be taking the oath of office shortly and become the 36th President of the United States. Lyndon B taking the oath. Fuck, we love Lyndon B. Johnson here, don't we? So good. What's not to love about him?

Yeah. His name. You know, the list goes on. Other stuff. Et cetera. For the next four days, along with his colleagues, Cronkite continued to report segments of uninterrupted coverage of the assassination, including the announcement

of Lee Harvey Oswald's death in the hands of Jack Ruby. The next day, on the day of the funeral, Cronkite concluded CBS Evening News with the following assessment of the events of the last four dark days. It is said that the human mind has a greater capacity for remembering the pleasant than the unpleasant, but today was a day that will live in memory and in grief. Tonight there will be few Americans who will go to bed without carrying with them a sense that somehow they've failed.

If in the search of our conscience we find a new dedication to the american concept that brought no political sectional religious or racial divisions then maybe it may yet be possible to say that john fitzgerald kennedy did not die in vain that's the way it is monday 25th of november 1963 this is walter cr Good night. He had a- That's the way it is was something he said a lot. So, yeah. So, he's quite famous for reporting or, you know, being that face of reporting Kennedy's assassination. Another thing that he- Sounds like he blamed all Americans for that assassination.

Yeah. That's kind of what he said. He's like, when you go to bed tonight, think about what you've done, okay? Yeah. I've cut a chunk out there because it went forever, but I think he was essentially trying to be like, hey. Dan Rather, more like Dan Blather. Am I right?

Yeah, except it's Walter Cronkite. Walter Cronkite, more like, Walter, let's move it on, mate. Come on, next show's about to start. TikTok, buddy. So, Walter Cronkite was there on America's TV through some of the biggest world news stories. Wait, wait. Walter Cronkite, more like, Walter, might you hurry up, please, mate? There's an article from the Washington Post that was great.

Until 1968, Walter Cronkite believed what his government told him about the Vietnam War. He was an old-school journalist, a patriot, a man who came of age covering World War II as a wire service reporter and then taking over as the anchor of the CBS Evening News. Obviously, we all know this. Like most journalists of his generation, he embraced the fight against communism and understood why the United States had intervened in the war raging in Vietnam. He was sort of known as like Uncle Walter, people kind of called him

really affectionately. And he developed a reputation as the ultimate straight shooter, the avatar of objectivity, in the words of Richard Perloff, a professor of communications at Cleveland State University. He'd never taken a public position on the war. But in mid-February of 1968, Cronkite and his executive producer, Ernest Leiser, travelled to Vietnam to cover the aftermath of the Tet Offensive. They were invited to dine with US General Creighton Abrams, who told Cronkite the war effort needed another 200,000 American troops. The general engaged in what Cronkite described in his memoir as the brutally technical discussion

of the firepower and kill ratios and the like. How in effect we could kill more Vietnamese. I wanted to win the war, but this emotionless professionalism was hard to take. So he's sort of seeing how really brutal it is. After a relatively short visit, Cronkite returned to the US and on Feb 27th, CBS aired a report called Report from Vietnam, Who, What, When, Where, Why? Which is snappy. I think we can all agree.

That's like, is that Journalism 101? No, you wouldn't really do why. That's more current affairs. Editorialising. So, you just do who, what, where, when. Yeah. The why is current affairs. Gotcha.

Yeah, the why and how is current affairs. Right. That's what I learnt. Cronkite ended the one-hour program with his own editorial. He acknowledged that what he was about to say was subjective. In an uncharacteristic move, he was about to share his opinion. Okay. He says, it seems now more certain than ever that the bloody experience

of Vietnam is to end in a stalemate. It is increasingly clear to this reporter that the only rational way out will be to negotiate, not as victors, but as an honourable people who lived up to their pledge to defend democracy and did the best they could. A story that's a bit disputed but pretty amazing is that President Lyndon B. Johnson later said that if he'd lost Cronkite, he'd lost Middle America.

That's how influential Cronkite is. He ended the war. Yeah. Wow. cronkite is he ended the war yeah wow pretty crazy he didn't end the war but like historians say the media coverage didn't necessarily change the american view on the war but something did pivot when cronkite crossed the line into opinion he kind of mainstreamed anti-war sentiment which was absolutely there i mean you know people were protesting vietnam war for a long time um but he he yeah he he mainstreamed it and people kind of went like oh shit like yeah and so the president sees the tide turning yeah in opinion he goes okay and apparently like part of why he lyndon b johnson chose not to run, like he pulled out of the race, was he had like, yeah, his health wasn't great and he was sort of like,

with this shift, I can't, I won't survive, like politically, I won't survive the criticism. So it's kind of interesting. Washington Post says, Cronkite's great persuasive power emerged from his long history of not attempting to be persuasive at all. So JFK's assassination and the Vietnam War were two of the main world events Walter Cronkite's great persuasive power emerged from his long history of not attempting to be persuasive at all. So JFK's assassination and the Vietnam War were two of the main world events most commonly connected to Walter Cronkite's journalistic career.

But here's just a few more things that he covered in his, like, 20 years. The moon landing. Okay. Watergate. What was his opinion on the moon landing? He was a big fan. This is bullshit. Actually, apparently, like, again, it was a bit uncharacteristic.

He was, like, really delighted. He was on air like, oh, yay. I mean, today. Momentous day, yes. That's hard to think of something that would happen now that would feel as momentous. Yeah. of something that would happen now that would feel as momentous yeah even like if i feel like even if they got to mars and someone set foot on mars if they haven't already we wouldn't all be

watching live would we i feel like we i feel like there'd be it would be huge of course but it still feels like you're like yeah they got they got on one i'm sure they get on all of them though the moon is so much closer to earth than Mars. You're like, yeah. Oh, they went to another one? Good on them. Yeah, of course they did. Well, I just know what the famous phrase they say is. I'll know it for trivia, but.

But I don't, I'm not going to watch it. Yeah. Live. That's inconvenient. I've got so much to do. Yeah, the footy's on. I can watch that later. That's the thing.

Back then, it's like you couldn't watch it later. Yeah, that's right. You couldn't tape it, watch it later. Couldn't see it on YouTube later. So, yeah, the moon landing, Watergate and Nixon's resignation, the Iran hostage crisis, Martin Luther King Jr.'s assassination, John Lennon's assassination, the death of another president, Lyndon B. Johnson.

So it was a busy couple of decades. Oh, Lyndon be gone. Lyndon be dead. There's a few. The first handful there we've done episodes on so i feel like we really need to tick a few more of those big events off our list have we done john lennon you did the beatles yeah but we haven't talked yeah i don't think you because it's such a big topic covered the that could be a thing john lennon's assassination sure have we we have

have we done a martin luther king episode. No. That's interesting. That is. That's going to be in the hat a lot, I reckon. Yeah. I reckon it's been up for a vote for sure. Yeah, right. We should absolutely do that. What was the other one in there? The Iran hostage crisis.

Yeah. I don't know if I know anything about that. Jess, could you do all of those later this year? Absolutely. Thank you. I forget what I had for lunch. I don't remember that. Someone remind Jess, please. Yeah, tweetess please yeah she had loaded fries okay they were delicious i've got a bit of acid reflux now because i'm old um okay so yes so yeah just just you know you could talk all day

but essentially these are topics that are interesting in themselves and that we've covered but it's just like if you think about it from a news anchor's point of view, he's covered some of the biggest events in history. Pretty crazy. He was there. He was there. At the time, CBS had a mandatory retirement policy

once a person hit the age of 65, and many people were saddened by his departure, comparing him to a father or uncle figure. And they actually enforced it. Yeah. I was almost certain you were going to say, but for this legend, they said- No. If you want to keep going, you can.

Isn't that crazy? They kicked him out. One of the biggest- Yeah, the most trusted man in America, one of the biggest names in news, and they were like, you got to go. Well, that's a strange rule. Yeah. I mean, this is back in like the-

It's the 60s or the 70s. It's the 80s by this point, yeah. But it's almost looking after. It's like, hey, enjoy retirement. Come on. You've done a great bit at work here. Yeah. Give someone else a go.

Nah. But, yeah, so people sort of saw him as an uncle figure. But in an interview about his retirement, he described himself as being more like a comfortable old shoe to his audience. You know? It's been a bit self-deprecating. Of course, the 65-year anniversary of his birth being blue sapphire.

That's right. Oh, he got the blue sapphire. 65. Okay. I'm going to hold on a while to get some sapphire. I could just buy my own. His last day in the anchor chair was March 6, 1981, and this was his farewell statement.

This is my last broadcast as the anchorman of the CBS Evening News. For me, it's a moment for which I have long planned, but which nevertheless comes with some sadness. For almost two decades after all, we've been meeting like this in the evenings, and I'll miss that. But those who have made anything of this departure, I'm afraid have made too much. This is but a transition, a passing of the baton. A great broadcaster and gentleman, Doug Edwards, preceded me in this job, and another, Dan Rather, will follow. And anyway, the person who sits here is but the most conspicuous member of a superb team of journalists, writers, reporters, editors,

producers, and none of that will change. Furthermore, I'm not even going away. I'll be back from time to time with special news. I'm sleeping under the desk. I'm not giving up. I'll be back from time to time with special news. I'm sleeping under the desk. I'm not giving up. I'll be back from time to time with special news reports and documentaries and beginning in June every week with our science program, Universe.

Old anchormen you see don't fade away. They just keep coming back for more. That's great. How good is that? And that's the way it is, Friday, March 6, 1981. I'll be away on assignment, and Dan Rather will be sitting in here for the next few years. And Dan Rather can take this mic out of my cold dead hand.

Fuck you, Rather. I think it's cute. Yeah, I like that. I like that little gag in there. It's okay. It's not about me. Anyway, it's a mic. It's a word band.

Hey, that's a beautiful sign-off there. That will not be how I'd end Absolutely not You'd be burning bridges Oh yeah The following people can go fuck themselves I'd be like I'm rolling a list

I'd be building some bridges only to burn them I'd be saying, hey, fuck you Fuck you Fuck you Can't wait And I wouldn't exactly say he retired He was as active as ever. He continued to broadcast occasionally as a special correspondent for CBS, CNN and NPR.

One such occasion was Cronkite anchoring the second space flight by John Glenn in 1998 as he had the first flight in 1962. That's kind of cool. What's that? What's a space flight? It's a flight in space. So, the second one happened in the 90s. Or is it John Glenn's second flight?

Okay, sorry. John Glenn's, yeah. Oh, my God. What is that compared to a rocket ship flight? John Glenn flew over Australia at some point. Oh. Threw over Perth or something. My friend Stacey, there was somebody dressed as John Glenn at Stacey's wedding.

It was a long story and I loved it. It was amazing. Wait, what? Yeah. Can you- Was it a dress-up wedding? No. So, okay.

Here's what it was. Here's what it was. What's John Glenn? So, my friend Stacey- He's an astronaut. So, they dressed as an astronaut at the wedding. So, John Glenn's flight, I think it must have been the 1962 flight, had passed over like Perth or something.

And Perth, we love them, but they're a very isolated city. And there was a campaign in the 90s like where they got a bunch of children to sing this song and it was like an ad to get John Glenn to come back to Perth. They were trying to do that. And so at the wedding they told this story. One of their friends came out dressed in an astronaut costume and everybody sang the song to John Glenn. And everyone knew what was going on apart from you.

All the Perth people did. Well, the rest of us just went along with it and went, why is somebody dressed as an astronaut at this wedding? The wedding also had a laser show at one point. Holy shit. It was the most event-packed wedding I've ever been to in my life. It was amazing. John Glenn. I saw John Glenn and I was like, oh, it's John Glenn.

John Glenn. I've seen him at a wedding. So, Cronkite, he also hosted the annual Vienna New Year's concert on PBS. From 1985 to 2008, he hosted that. Every year, New Year's concert in Vienna succeeded by Julie Andrews in 2009. Previous report topic. Yeah. I thought I'd said some words wrong there.

For many years until 2002, he also hosted the annual Kennedy Center Honors. He lent his voice to IMAX movies and Disney World rides, animated films and Broadway shows. and Disney World rides, animated films and Broadway shows. He recorded voiceovers for the 1995 film Apollo 13, modifying the script he was given to make it a little bit more Cronkite-ian. Oh, yeah. He appeared on The Mary Tyler Moore Show in 1974 and Murphy Brown in the late 80s and early 90s. He hosted multiple documentaries, spoke at and hosted events

and was a political activist. He spoke out against the war on drugs, Rupert Murdoch, and America's presence in Iraq. Yeah, wow. So, he was busy. USA Today wrote that few TV figures have ever had as much power as Cronkite did at his height. For many years, until a decade after he left his post as anchor, Cronkite was considered one of the most trusted figures in the United States. For most of his 19 years as anchor,

he was the predominant news voice in America. It's pretty big. Yeah. It's wild, especially because you think about Australian news and it's different in every state. Right. But, yeah, he's like- Even in different cities, like there'll be regional news and stuff.

Yeah. So that's not the case over there. Or maybe it wasn't then. Oh, right, gotcha. Yeah. Just, that's not the case over there. Or maybe it wasn't then. Oh, right. Gotcha. Yeah. Just to mention as well a few awards and acknowledgements he's had in his career. In 1981, the year he retired, former President Jimmy Carter awarded Cronkite the Presidential Medal of Freedom.

In 85, he was honoured with an induction into the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences Hall of Fame. In 89, he received the Four Freedoms Awards for the Freedom of Speech. He won four Peabodies for Excellence in Broadcasting. In March of 2006, he became the only non-NASA recipient of an Ambassador of Exploration Award. Everybody else that's got that award is from NASA. He must be like, oh, what's on today? Oh, another huge award.

I want him in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame tonight. Okay, no worries. See you there. It's crazy. I'll be there. He has a planet named after him? That's gotta be a lie. Cronkite? It sounds like Krypton. That's so close to Kryptonite

already. Minor planet 6318 Cronkite, which was discovered in 1990 that's great the journalism school at arizona state university is named after him and there's a six thousand square foot memorial dedicated to him at missouri western state university which is in saint joseph where he was born huge huge so and that's just that's just a few i mean honestly that's really impressive but once the a planet is aimed after you, you go, oh, everything else is whatever. That's true.

I've got a freaking planet. I've got a planet. I'm going to return to my home planet now. So, that's just a few of his acknowledgements. Sadly, all good things must come to an end. No. And Walter Cronkite passed away in June 2009 at the age of 92. A good innings. A good innings.

Really good innings. Great one. He was cremated in his remains buried in the family plot in Kansas City next to his wife, Betsy, who had passed away four years earlier. So, 92. Amazing. Love it. Love to hear that.

Walter Cronkite. I know the name. Yeah. And I reckon I would have said American TV News. Oh, but you didn't, though, which is interesting. I reckon I would have if given that chance again. True, and I guess all I said to you was most trusted man in America. If you asked me again now, knowing what I know now, I would-

I also- I wouldn't have accessed the name like Dave did, but if you said who is Walter Cronkite, I think I would have said American TV News. Yeah, but like- But I thought he was a current guy. Yeah, right. And like I said earlier, it's like a name you know, but not necessarily a story you know.

And it's hard to sort of- It's a hard story to tell because, I mean, a lot of it is him reporting on news of big major events. But, yeah, back in the day especially. And to be trusted that way in the media is incredible yeah really cool and so rare and i can't i can't think of anybody else i can't think of anybody in our australian media that i would be like i trust you i reckon he would have won multiple gold logies yeah he was australian i think maybe yana yana vent maybe she you trust yana- You trust Yana?

Maybe I trust Yana. I don't know. Okay. Or Jennifer Kite. They're the two big ones. Jennifer Kite. Maybe Ian Henderson. Ian Henderson.

Hendo, for sure. Yeah. Mal Walden. Always felt I could trust him. A great voice. Peter Hitch, you know. I love the Hitch. Peter grew up with the Hitch.

Saints fan. Love the Hitch. Love him. Grew up with the Hitch. Love him. You grew up with the Hitch? As in like he was our news guy. Okay, Grew up with The Hitch. Love him. You grew up with The Hitch? As in like he was our news guy. Okay, yeah.

Every night, 6 p.m., Channel 9. We went to kinder together. I met him last year. He was a delight. It was such a thrill. Yeah. I was so excited. I've met-

Oh, man. I've met- You've met- Interesting people, sure. But freaking Peter Hitchner? Peter Hitchner? Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me?

The best. I pulled up an article from Roy Morgan Research. You were talking about most trusted people. They've done a big survey. This is in 2021. Most trusted professions in Australia. I was saying, like, where do journalists rate in Australia? You know, talking about Cronkite number one in America back then.

You want to have any guesses? Who would be most trusted? Most trusted. Firefighters? Firefighters. Do you want to have any guesses? Who would be most trusted? Most trusted. Firefighters. Firefighters. Oh, did they make the list? Come on, you don't trust a firefighter. Yeah, come on.

Don't you trust a firefighter? I can understand not cops being up there, but firefighters. Yeah, who else do you- They did not make the list. Really? Okay. Well, then this feels like bullshit. Paramedic?

Doctors are number two. 82% trust. I've had some pretty crook conversations with doctors, to be honest. Who do you choose? Number one, most. Similar ballpark. Nurses. Yes.

Yeah, I was going to say, yeah. Nurses are number one. You're telling me bankers aren't on there? Bankers. So, from the bottom, the lowest is car salesman. Second lowest, advertising. Third lowest, real estate. Yep, this all makes sense so far. Fourth lowest, Insurance Brokers. Yes, yep, yep. Fifth lowest, State Members of Parliament. Yep.

Then we've got Federal Members of Parliament. Yep. They're actually equal. Business Execs, Stock Brokers, Talkback Radio Announcers, TV Reporters. They're the bottom. They're all in the bottom third. So, TV Rep reporters and radio a talkback radio announcers are slightly below tv reporters that's incredible yeah nurses up top for sure where are podcasters and comedians yeah please bank managers are somewhere in the middle 20 trust really i mean one in five people trust them they're probably people who are related to bank managers wouldn't wish that on an enemy i'd freaking leave the country if that was the case. Or worse.

I don't know. Go to Cronkite. You would go to Cronkite. You know what I mean. Who are the most trusted? Nurses, number one. Nurses, then doctors and pharmacists, school teachers, dentists, engineers, high court judges, state supreme court

judges. You trust an engineer over a fucking supreme court judge. Yeah, it's interesting. Then university lecturers are below them, and then police are sort of just above 50%. You know anybody can be a university professor. I don't think that's true. I think I could walk in

and do it. Oh, yeah, yeah. Walter Cronkite did. I don't think that's true. I think I could walk in and do it. Oh, yeah, yeah. Walter Cronkite did. I don't think that makes you trustworthy. No, I know, but I guess that's just there. That's just what people imagine. Nearly anyone can be a cop, you know. Nearly anyone can be a dentist if you get really good grades, I guess. That's bonkers.

You know when I trust doctors? I trust doctors when I'm in a critical condition. Then I absolutely trust doctors. And you're often in a critical condition, if I'm being honest, Jess. Well, look, can I just end with one little thing about Walter Cronkite? Yes. That seems apt, honestly. It's a little quote from him about his catchphrase that he was quite known for.

I'm Cronkite, bitch. You can get fucked is that it yeah so i guess i have nothing else to say so that brings us to everybody's no it's as anchor man of the cbs evening news i signed off my nightly broadcast for nearly two decades with a simple statement and that's the way it is. To me, that encapsulates the newsman's highest ideal, to report the facts as he sees them without regard for the consequences or controversy that may ensue. That's the way it is. That's the way it is.

Ah, Cronk tells it like it is. So there you go. That's kind of the story of a name you probably know, but maybe didn't know much of the story or why he was the most trusted man in America. No, but now knowing that, I trust him. Yeah, I trust him. I trust him.

On your cronk. On your cronk. On your cronk. That was one of his other catchphrases. You've been cronked. Wow. You could have given me a million guesses as to what the report was going to be about today. And I don't think I would have ever got to Walter Cronkite.

Better be Mal Walden next week. Tell you that much for nothing. What a great name, Mal Walden. Mal Walden. Mal Walden. Well, that does bring us to everyone's favourite section of the show where we thank some of our fantastic supporters. Without these people, we'd not have a show here.

And if you want to support the show like them, go to patreon.com slash do go on pod. And there's a bunch of different things you can get involved in. If you become a Patreon supporter, you get bonus episodes, three every month. Can you believe that? Three? And access to the previous catalogue, which has hit 190? That's quite incredible. We're going to do something special for the 200th bonus app. Super duper special. It's top secret. Okay.

So secret we haven't even talked about. You can also join the Facebook group, the nice corner on the internet. Get to vote on topics like this one today from Jess Perkins. You can be the ones putting Walter Cronkite in people's ears. That's a lot of power. Yeah, almost too much. Use it wisely. But the first thing we normally like to do in this section of the show is talk about the people on the Sidney Schoenberg level in a section we

like to call the fact, quote, or question section, which I think has a deal that goes on like this. Fact, quote, or question. He always remembers the ding and she always remembers the sing. And they've done it again. And that's the way it is. Got cronk. So, this section- Got cronk.

Not even cronked. Got cronk. Got cronk. Hashtag got cronk. So, this section is where people give us a fact-quoted question if they're on the Sidney Schoenberg level or above. They also get to give themselves a title. And I read them out for the first time when I'm reading them out.

And first up this week, we've got one from Nick Fidian. And Nick Fidian has whiskers on his chin. Oh, no. I'm running out of steam here. Nick Fidian, aka Majorly Running Out of Names. Don't worry, Matt just gave you one there. And Nick's offering us a joke. All right.

Love this. Here we go. Writing, if you ask Rick Astley for his copy of the movie Up, he cannot give it to you as he will never give you up. However, in doing so, he lets you down, thus creating the Astley Paradox. Oh, he's never going to give you up, but he's never going to let you down. But he does let you down. Oh, my gosh.

Rick, I just want to watch Up. Rick. I just want to see a talking dog. That dog talks. Up. No kidding. Worth a rewatchwatch i've missed some of the subtleties uh thank you so much nick fidion or nick fidion next one comes from jacob jacob jaron jpeb jpeb jpeb jacob i think you could edit together any of those combinations and you might get one right.

J-bib. J-bib, you're on. Jacob has got the title of Mr. G and the G is for Narl. Oh, so maybe that is. Is that clue meaning it's Jacob Eron or a soft G? We'll never know. Jacob's asking a question writing, Hey, guys, hope all is well.

Miss you guys. We have never met, but I assume we would miss each other. Aren't we some silly little chaps like that? Yes. Anyways, let's cut this tension with a question. When you were a kid, what profession did you think you would be in? Was it always entertaining or did Matt want to be a race car driver? Oh, man.

If I could have been Dick Johnson when I was a boy, I would have said sign me up right here, right now. You wanted to be Dick? I want to be Dick. I want to be Johnson. I always thought I would be on TV or in movies as a kid, but I don't know why, as I never wanted to act. I just thought it was a cool job. Sneaking in a brag here as I just got accepted into my dream school at UCLA or UCLA perhaps here in Los Angeles and I just figured my best mates from Australia who I miss very much should know. All jokes aside you have been a part of my Wednesday routine for at least five years now, and you still never miss on an episode.

Thanks for the laughs. Hey, Jacob, thank you for the listening. Thank you. Congratulations getting into UCLA. Yeah, it's great. Fantastic work. And you don't have to be an actor to be on TV. You could also be Walter Cronkite.

Have you ever thought about that? I'm Jacob. You're on. And you've just been geared on. I think that's a great starting point and you've just been geared on. I think that's a great starting point. You've just been geared on. You've just been geared on. No, that doesn't work.

We talked about this a little while ago about jobs we thought we might do. At one point, I wanted to be a basketballer by day, a rock star by night. But, I mean, I went through a lot of different things. Before I realized that you can't follow your dreams, I wanted to be like a drawer. What do you call them? Illustrator. Illustrator.

Artist. Mainly because you couldn't tell anyone what you wanted to be. You know, I want to be a drawer. I remember when I was a kid, I loved drawing so much as a kid. Loved it, loved it, loved it. And I said that to, I can't remember if it was a teacher or a parent, but their advice was architecture. They have to draw.

So, that became, and I just went, oh, okay. They're like, if you want to get a job and you want to draw, then architecture. So, I start for a little while, I'm like, I want to be an architect. Journalist at one point in high school, I wanted to be a journalist. Yep. But, yeah. I wanted to be a writer of some kind A nurse, a paramedic

I wanted to help people And now I just do very self indulgent things And help no one Don't at me and say I help you I don't mean like that I mean You come you go I'm very sick And I go oh fixed that I don't do that So don't you come, you go, I'm very sick. And I go, all fixed. That.

I don't do that. So, no, you come at me and say that in some sick way comedy is healing. And collectively everyone's like, we weren't. We would never compare you to a nurse. Go on. I wanted to be a frog Frog. Frog by day. Archaeologist by night. Of course.

After watching The Mummy, Brendan Fraser and Rachel Weisz, my two heroes growing up. Yeah. What a combo. What a hero combo. They still are my absolute- Any hopes for a sequel? Mummy sequel? Of? The Mummy.

The Mummy 2. No, a new sequel. Mummy 4 or whatever. The fourth one. I don a new sequel. Mummy 4 or whatever. The fourth one. I don't know. I'll never say never. Any hopes? Like, I'm somehow greenlighting the movie.

I'll ask if you're still hoping for it because there's been talk of it lately. Oh, yes, I absolutely do hope. But I do hope that Rachel Weisz will come back. Remember when she skipped number three? Yes. And this wasn't as good without her. I thought- I don't think that was the reason. thought the replacement was fine maybe not wise fine vice

fine yeah yeah but um yeah archaeologist was my primary school dream job thank you so much jacob and congratulations on getting into ucla very very exciting and i miss you too jacob that is 100 effect don't be a stranger our last one this week week comes from Megan Graham, aka Muppet Master. And Megan's asking a question, writing, Ruknama, Ruknama. And Ruknama to you too, Megan. Thank you so much. If you could erase one dish from the world, what would it be? My vote is for apricot chicken.

I don't get fruit and meat as a thing. Anyway, love you guys and congrats on being ace. Even if you like apricot chicken. Well, I'll stop you right there. I do not like apricot chicken. So, I'm with you on that. I've never had it. But I'm happy to never have it again. I reckon I could do two for one here.

I'll knock mine out and also knock that out by saying I would just ban apricots. Whoa, no. Do not like. What? Apricots are great. I love an apricot. Horrible flavour. They are a bit full on.

Horrible smell. Horrible smell. Horrible on chicken. Horrible on their own. Sorry, we've let our parrot out of the cage. Absolutely. Horrible flavour. I would not be putting that in my mouth.

Horrible flavour. Horrible. Horrible. Horrible. Never again. You follow me, Waltz? Polyate. Polyate.

Polyate. Polyate. Apricot. Is it food or meal? I think it's a dish. It's a dish. So I guess you could take that any way, which way you want. I don't like most things.

Is that true? How to narrow it down. Yeah, there's a lot I don't like. I'm sure that true? How to narrow it down. Yeah, there's a lot I don't like. Oh, I'm sure. What don't I eat? Fruitcake? Yeah, fruitcake and fuck off. Yeah, good one.

Oh, no, fuck fruitcake. Yuck. Yeah, it's- I- Don't like it. Can't really think of too many things I really dislike. But yeah, that one is one that I'm like, what are we doing here? We've moved past this.

This is what they had to do in the old days because they didn't understand that things could be better. Yuck. People don't do them anymore, probably. I hope not. What's a deviled egg? It's an egg that has sinned. Yeah. That's Satan's egg, though.

Satan's egg. Come on, Dave. I'll give it a try. Deviled eggs. Hard-boiled eggs where the yolk is mixed with mayonnaise, mustard, vinegar, salt and pepper. That sounds all right. Oh, my God, I'm in. Oh, my God.

Bring him back. Okay, I just don't like eggs. Don't bring him. But I wouldn't erase them because everybody, like, so many people really love eggs. And also, they make cakes nice and fluffy. Okay. So, I wouldn't say no to eggs, but I don't want to eat them, thank you. What about you, Matt?

Is there anything you'd just like to strike from the record? He said fruitcake, and I back him on that. Oh, yeah, sorry, yeah. It's not that I really hate. There's just lots I don't like. Yeah, I don't like zucchini very much. Yeah, okay. But I don't mind a zucchini slice.

Right. But that's because it's, like, chopped up so fine in there. Yeah. I guess. I don't like olives, but, like, not enough that it, you know, if there was a bit of olive on a pizza, I wouldn't be like. Last month you were talking about being excited about going to Olive Garden. And now I hear this. What is it with you?

Do we like olives or do we hate olives? I don't understand. Dairy? Dairy? You hate olives or you like olive garden? Is that what you're saying? Yeah, yeah. So olive garden, you can have a non-olive dish.

Absolutely, yes. You just have the garden. That's right. Thank you for that fantastic question, Megan. I agree. Every time I chickened chicken can fuck off. I'm happy to split the two up and keep them both alive. I mean, now that Jess has wiped eggs off the planet,

chickens aren't going to survive. Oh, my God. You don't have chickens without the eggs. We've got to protect the remaining chickens. I said you could keep your weird little eggs. Yeah, but the weird little ones aren't the ones that... Okay. The next thing we'd like to do is thank a few of our other fantastic Patreon supporters

who are on the shout-out level or above. Justin normally comes up with a bit of a game based on the topic at hand. Yeah, the name of the 1940s TV show they're in. Fantastic. Oh, okay, great. Which are nearly always about seven words long. Yeah, they're too long and they don't make a lot of sense. All right.

If I can kick us off, I'd love to thank from, I'm going to say, Middleborough, Massachusetts. Am I, Dave? Absolutely. Jeffrey Stidston. Jeffrey Stidston. Who's that behind the door? Yeah, yeah.

You've just invented, thank God you're here. Yeah. Who's that behind the door? Love it. Who's that behind the door love it who's that behind the door and that but unlike thank god you're here there's not a scene that's acted out they just open the door and they go it was greg let's find out who's behind the next door we'll be back after the break uh jeffrey stidson congratulations on your fantastic name by the way excellent work on the name i'd also like to thank from bellingllingham, or Bellingham, also in Massachusetts.

Wow. It's Ryan. What about, ride this pummel horse, please. What is a pummel horse? That's the athletics horse, isn't it? No, gymnastics horse. Gymnastics, one of those ones. Mr. Pummel Horse.

They just wheel it into the studio and then, you know, for half an hour, we can do whatever you like on it. That sounds like a different kind of show to me. Go to town. Go on a root rampage if you want. Gorka comes in and says, that'll be all. Good night. Was root rampage this episode?

Yeah. I got confused. It said route tour You're going to go on a route tour? That's funny Thank you so much Ryan Enjoy the horse However you please

I mean you're hosting it Until Cronkite comes in and gongs you off Enjoy watching people Have a go at that horse. And finally for me- Freestyle. I'd love to thank from Happy Town here in Melbourne, Camberwell in Victoria, it's Caitlin Hodder.

I always thought of it as Happy Town. Why is that? When I was a teenager, there was these freezer gigs there at the Camberwell Town Hall. And whenever I went there, it was like a Friday afternoon after school. The skies were always so blue. The sun was shining. Everyone was smiling. I probably only went there half a dozen times, but every time I went to Camberwell, and I

wouldn't have been back since. It's right there in the Atherton East, isn't it? I used to live right near that town hall, yeah. And I just always think, I'm like, it's the happiest place I've ever been. Still haven't been to Disneyland. That's possibly why. Happy town. I love it.

So, what's Caitlin Hodder's show? Step on the old tin roof. Step on the old tin roof. So, you've got to make sure you're not standing in the gaps. You want to be standing on the timbers there? Yep. And yeah, if you fall through- Or you will fall to your death. You die. And if you die, you're eliminated. It's a short-lived show. Yeah. Yeah, the tin- Yeah, they put them varying gaps. Can I thank some people as well? Yeah.

I would love to thank from Maidstone in Great Britain, it's Faye Diamond. Faye Diamond. That's good stuff. Faye Diamond, all aboard. All aboard! Exclamation mark? No.

Question mark. Oh, all aboard? Exclamation mark? No. Question mark. Oh, all aboard? It's a mystery show. It's them going, are we all aboard? I'll have to go do a check. And then it's a counting show. Oh, I like it. So, it'll be like a, it'll be, all right.

So, first topic tonight is women in the military. Are we all aboard? And this is the 1950s right and uh first one's like yes i think uh everyone i'm all aboard everyone uh should be allowed to be in the military if they like and i don't think uh ladies should be allowed in the military they're very distracting to the fellas there on the front lawn and it's's only going to lead to this disrest between the troops, and I think that at war's place is certainly not on the front line. It's somewhere else.

I don't want to say where, but it's certainly not there in the war. So something like that. And the way they could visualise it is there'd be like a train set, and they'd ask the question and say, do you believe in this? All aboard, and if you agree, you get on the train, and if not if not you stay on the platform and then they go around the platform and say what why do you think that yeah yeah what and then they go on the train why do you think that wow yeah well i think my very possibly i might get cancelled for this and that's fine i suppose but i don't think ladies belong in in the army uh i believe that they're too good for it

i think men should go and be killed and ladies should rule the world. Sorry, cancel me, fine. Stuff like that. Yeah. I think that's a green light for me. Yeah. But Manus, I buy all the characters. Slowly lose my mind.

Slowly. I would also love to thank from Ransgate, also in Great Britain, Daniel Faulkner. Daniel Faulkner. What about the TV show, Show Us Your Teeth? Oh, I wasn't sure where that was going. And I love it. Show Us Your Teeth. There's like a special camera that goes and everyone looks right into your mouth.

You talk through the history of your smile. Wow. It runs into your mouth. You talk through the history of your smile. Wow. And then an expert comes in and says, has to be able to say, guess how many fillings. Yeah.

Have you had braces? Have you had braces? Have you had a plate? Do you currently have a plate in? Are you a flosser? Yeah. Are you a smoker? Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Coffee drinker, et cetera. Love that. And then maybe get a little teeth makeover. Yes. And whoever has the best teeth wins. They spin the set around and they're like, I ran your shirt, I said, I said, hello, thank you.

We've come up with some pretty good shows. Yeah, this is a pretty good good shows I'd watch a show called That's good stuff Finally for me I would love to thank from Kirkwall Also in Great Britain Elizabeth Welch Elizabeth Welch, fantastic name there Elizabeth

Yes, Deal or Welch Deal or Welch Yeah so A deal is struck And Yes. Deal or welch? Deal or welch? Yeah. So, a deal is struck and- I'm in. And quietly, individually- This has been done before, but individually they can- If you decide to welch on the deal-

Yes. If you decide to welch on the deal Yes And the other one says Still says deal The welcher gets the grand prize Oh wow Whereas if you both make the deal you split the prize But if you both welch no one gets the prize You get nothing

So it's a risk Yeah It's just a badging of another game But this one was invented in the 50s. Yeah, they've ripped off D'Angelo Welch. Dave, would you like to thank some people? I'm somewhere to be. We haven't actually even talked about what time we need to finish today.

We're just going to keep talking. All right, I would like to thank, from Great Falls in Montana, Alex Thayer. Alex Thayer, thank From Great Falls in Montana Alex Thayer Alex Thayer Man Great Falls Montana I want to be there Doesn't that sound fantastic Great Falls

In the big sky country Bungee off this Oh So you're blindfolded Yeah So you don't know the height You don't know what it is You just have to jump

You have to jump It's a trust exercise But if you go through That you'll win a prize You'll win a prize If you survive you win a prize You don't know the height. You don't know what it is. You just have to jump. You have to jump. It's a trust exercise. But if you go through with it, you'll win a prize. You'll win a prize. If you survive, you win a prize. Yeah, there is a risk that you will break your neck. Because the other part of the game is, which you don't know,

you get the choice of three lengths of bungee cord, and the longer you pick without going over... Right. ...the bigger the prize. Great. So, you can go all in and and go I'll have the longest rope Yes You blindfold and then you walk up a three foot ladder Yeah, yeah

And you can jump Oh, Alex Slayer, that's fantastic work Love it I think that is good I think we've actually Bungie off this is a great name I hope Reg Grundy's listening. Yeah.

Might green light some of these. Is Reg still with us? Sadly, I don't think so. Oh, rest in peace. I'll wait to find out. I'd like to thank now from Long Gully here in Victoria, big shout out to Jas or Jase, J-A-S. Jas, I reckon.

Jas. Jas. Jas. Jas. Two options there. What about a TV show Jazz. Jazz. Jazz. Jazz. Two options there. What about a TV show called Bag of Puss? Oh, I hate that. No.

First up. No more. No more. No further context on that. Thank you. If you can explain your eye out of it. No. No.

Bag of something. I'm happy with Bag of, but Puss has to go. But that's only one in 100 chance you get it. What about Bag of Pus Pasta? And it's spaghetti made out of pus. I'm going to know that one now. You're not in? Okay.

Oh, my God, Jess. I'm not in. You're hard to impress. Yeah, no, Bag of Pus is no good. I'm not watching that. It sounds disgusting. Bag of Cats. Bag of Cats.

Okay. Now, how do you play Bag of Cats, Jess? You give in a bag. Yeah. And two minutes on the clock. How many cats you can put in the bag? And now- Somehow this is more fucked than puffs.

How is this worse? How? Did I say that you do anything with the bag once you've caught the cats? I think we're all picturing a weighted bag. No. And a lake. You get to keep the cats. Oh, you get to keep as many cats.

We also get to keep the cats Oh you get to keep as many cats But you also get to keep the pus Jazz I'm so sorry There's a hundred bags 99 of them are full with gold bullion One of them's full of pus You pick the bag Okay but it's like sort of Nickelodeon channel fake gooey pus right It's not real pus

Yeah fine if that's going to make you not say no. So it's a 1% chance of getting pus. Exactly. You'd take that deal, wouldn't you? Yeah. But how embarrassing would it be if you were the one who picked the bag of pus? Are you allowed to touch the bags? No. Oh, okay. Because I know gold is soft, but it's not as soft as pus. It's soft for a metal.

Yeah, yeah. But not soft for pus. No. On a metal to pus scale. Yeah. Yuck. It's only one in 100. Okay, I've said okay. I just don't want to hear any more about it.

And it's hosted by Andrew O'Keefe. Just to add a little danger element. Oh, my God. Not going to touch that one. And finally, I would like to thank from- Okay, but we can talk about pus for an hour. I'd like to thank from Kings Langley. Never heard of that.

From New South Wales, it's Patrick Farmer. Patrick Farmer. Patrick Farmer wants a wife is the obvious one, but that's not where we're going. We're not doing that. Oh, no. Turn your laptop off. Turn your laptop off.

Okay, we have to have a quick break there because I knocked over about a litre of water into my computer. Yeah. And I was like, oh, whoops. And Dave luckily was like, where are you going to save that computer? Turn it off. Turn it off. He snapped into action. I wouldn't have picked Dave to be good in a crisis.

Yeah. Thank you. Do you define good as, oh, my God. Yeah. Snapping into action. Yeah. I ran and got a towel because I have spilled a glass of water on a laptop before and it killed it.

It never recovered. So, I didn't want that to happen to you. Which I appreciate because I only got this computer a few months ago. Yeah. You yelled at me. Turn it off, turn it off because you don't want the water in it while it's on. It's bad. It's so funny how many baths I've had with this computer and that's the time I got wet.

Jesus Christ. Baths with the computer. No, not- How else do you wash a computer? It's efficient. You don't have to use twice as much water. Yeah, that's right. Otherwise, the computer has its own bath. Take me later.

This computer is my best friend. You're telling me you wouldn't bathe with your best friend? I never have it plugged in when I go in the bath with it. I'm not stupid. So what were we up to then? We were coming up with a TV show for Patrick Farmer. Patrick Farmer. Okay.

All right. Let's go over a classic full sentence one. Yep. I'll come up with the first couple of words. Jess middles it. Dave, you bring it home. I promise I won't say pus. However you want to.

Pus. In my bucket. Is it a Kiwi joke? However you want to pus in my bucket. However you want to puss in my bucket. However you want to puss in my bucket. It's so narrow. Like, how many different ways can you puss in a bucket? You'd be surprised.

Honestly. From the top of a ladder. I can't believe it's been going for six seasons. I'm doing a handstand. I'm pissing in a bucket. That's hosted by Patrick Farmer. Through my friends who's holding their arms out like a hoop. Through an actual hoop.

Through one of those weird Rube Goldberg machines. Yeah. Oh, that's pretty good. Saw a bit of a fun sketch online last month where it's a long Rube Goldberg thing and it ends by pulling the plug out of someone on life support. Oh, that is good. I was enjoying the Rube, but that was a nice little touch. That's fun.

That's really fun. Oh, gosh. Well, on you, Patrick Farmer, and thank you so much to Jazz, Alex, Elizabeth, Daniel, Faye, Caitlin, Ryan, and Geoffrey. You're absolutely keeping this pod going by supporting us on Patreon, and we appreciate it. Patrick Farmer, though, you do owe me a new computer. There was something about you that made me wave my arms around.

Yeah, erratically. Well, that brings us to the final thing we need to do, which is bring a few people into the triptych club. Now, I don't have a working computer. Dave, do you think you can, or Jess? No, no. I would love to. No, let's absolutely.

No, no, no. It's fine. I don't think I could. Oh, my tiny little delicate lady brain. Can I just say one? I would't know. It's fine. I don't think I could. Oh, my tiny little delicate lady brain. Can I just say one? I would love it. Are you on board? A woman running a shout-out section at the end of a podcast?

You're off the train, but I'm on the train. But I also would love it if we could switch it a little bit where Matt has to try and come up without seeing these names. Yes. Try and come up with some of the puns. Because you're all talk, you fucking dirty dog. You always describe my wordplay as weak, but let's find out just how hard it is. Oh, no, it's just a character bit I do.

I really respect the work you do, Dave. Jess, would you be okay if I read out the names and you would be the hype man for Matt? Oh, great. Yeah, because I can't read out the names, that's for sure. But I think the harder job is hyping me off. Oh, yeah. We'll see how I go with that.

She seems hyped. But before we do that, we're going to tell people about the Trifidgy Clubs. In case you haven't heard before, this is our hall of fame where we induct people that tell people about the Triptych Club. In case you haven't heard before, this is our Hall of Fame where we induct people that have been supporting the show on the shout-out level or above for three consecutive years. They've already had a shout-out a little while back.

But to say thanks for supporting the show for so long, we induct them into our Hall of Fame slash clubhouse slash hangout zone theatre of the mind. It's an airport lounge for Jess. It's a gig for me sometimes. I book a band. Matt, it's something else to you. It's just gig for me sometimes. I book a band. Matt, it's something else to you. Completely a lovely, just a lovely place to hang out.

Yes. And I've booked a band this week. It was funny. I didn't even realise that I'd be taking over Dave's role when I booked this band. Just pure coincidence. But I've booked the, you won't believe it. Oh, my gosh. Really?

Really? What? Who have you got? The K tangle wow the walter com kite yeah is that his name what was his name conkite cronkite conkite i thought it didn't quite sound right but the kite thing still works so that's all are there david do you have any are there any bands named after him surely there's the cronkites or something um well obviously i booked these in advance so yes i could i'll try and book a band for about three years time from now walter cronkite band this is who we'll be booking in did you say you've got a cocktail bopper yeah got rum, cognac, curacao, grenadine, lemon juice I'm interested in this

Yeah I don't think my mind took in all of that That's a lot of stuff Yeah, but it's going to taste real good And that's a real one or is that your own concoction? I googled it, that's a real one Ooh, fantastic I don't think you've done one that isn't, like, purposely bad.

Last week it was a grenade. I was just holding a grenade. That was a month ago, Jess. Move on. Oh, yeah, that was ages ago. Grow up. Sorry. Well, in a few years' time, I'll be able to book in Too Much Saturn,

famous for their song Walter Cronkite, and they have had nine monthly listens on Spotify this month. So we could make that 10. Yeah. Great. Oh, that's fantastic. There was a, Friends of Rom on their first EP had a song called I Wish I Was As Credible As Roger Clemson or something like that.

And I think he was the Australian or maybe the Sydney respectable newsreader at the time. Roger Clemson or something. That doesn't really ring a bell. Oh, okay. Do you remember that song? No, I don't remember that one. Maybe if I heard it, I would have. I don't recognize Roger Clemson either.

It's off Dick Sandwich. English-born Australian retired media personality. There you go. There you go. Now, so what we've got here is, I forget who's who now. I'm standing- You're at the door. I'm at the door.

I've got the clipboard here with the names of the new inductees. There's three this week, Matt, so you are off pretty lightly. You only have to get induct three people. And I should also say for listeners at home, Dave is normally reading the names and addresses. He's pre-loading these. I get absolutely fucked. No, it's about time they knew.

You're on your own here. Well, that's right. I am on my own. Unlike Dave. You're getting no hype from me. I don't know what these names and addresses are. Well, that's right. I am on my own. Unlike Dave. You're getting no hype from me. I don't know what these names are. I've made some bridges then. I'm actually going to bring these

up off the top of the dome. I actually spent months writing mine. So, I'm happy to admit that. Happy to admit that. Actually, you know, I've got plenty of written for these, but I'll let you have a go, Matt. I'll let you have a go. So, what we're doing here usually Jess is on stage with me.

Matt reads out the names. I'll be doing that this week. So Jess is on stage with Matt who hypes these people up, and Jess will be hyping up Matt in theory. We'll find out how that goes. So let's get ready. Welcome them in. Let's not take away their big moment because they've been supporting the show

for a long, long time. I would like to say a big thank you and run on in from endicott in new york it's will bedoya will old bedoya i'll bloody love you hey in endicott getting a cut with me and let's have a nice uh will you marry me all right she's dropped the microphone. Okay. I'd like to thank, now, from Monaghan in Ireland, make them welcome. It's Paul McNally. Monaghan me your face.

I want to kiss it. Paul McNally, you're my pally. Will you marry me? Will you McNally me? Wow, it really came on strong for Paul there. And finally, I would like to thank... This is easier than it looks. Finally, from St. Albans in Greater St. Britons,

big shout-out and welcome to Sam Pears. Sam Pears. Let's get a couple of you in, maybe a pair of you. I've got one, I've got one, I've got one. We're certainly not going to all ban you. You're welcome any time you like. And Jess. Nothing Sam Pears.

Nothing Sam Pears to you. Make them welcome Sam, Paul and Will. That's good stuff. Jess, you've got the job. Next week, can you please take over? Absolutely not. That's the best. That's better than anything Dave's ever done,

and that was your first go at it. Happy to admit that. Happy to admit that. Nothing Sam pairs to you. Come on. Oh, that's fucking great. That's fucking great. That's so great.

I think women can be funny. I'm on board. Get him on the train. He's so great. I think women can be funny. I'm on board. Get him on the train. He's on board. We've lost our whites. Well, I don't know if you need the laptop for this bit, but that does bring us to the end of the episode.

Thank you so much for listening. Jess, is there anything else we need to tell the beautiful listener? That if they would like to suggest a topic, they can do so at dogoonpod.com, which is where you can also find information about live shows and all our other podcasts on this beautiful podcasting network we have. And you can find us at dogoonpod on all social media as well. Absolutely. Beautifully said. Thank you so much.

And can I just say, we'll be back next week with another episode. But until then, also, thank you so much for listening. And until then, goodbye. Bye. Bye. episode but until then also thank you so much for listening and until then goodbye we can wait for clean water solutions or we can engineer access to clean water we can acknowledge indigenous cultures or we can learn from indigenous voices we can demand more from the earth or we can learn from indigenous voices. We can demand more from the earth. Or we can demand more from ourselves. At York University, we work together to create positive change for a better tomorrow. Join us at yorku.ca slash write the future.