Do Go On - 431 - The Nutshell Studies of Unexplained Death

Episode Date: January 24, 2024

This week we look at the fascinating life of 'The Mother of Forensic Science' Frances Glessner Lee, and her revolutionary Nutshell Studies of Unexplained Death. This is a comedy/history podcast, the report begins at approximately 04:52 (though as always, we go off on tangents throughout the report).Support the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: patreon.com/DoGoOnPodSupport the show on Apple podcasts and get bonus episodes in the app: http://apple.co/dogoon Live show tickets: https://dogoonpod.com/live-shows/ Submit a topic idea directly to the hat: dogoonpod.com/suggest-a-topic/Check out our merch: https://do-go-on-podcast.creator-spring.com/ Check out our AACTA nominated web series: http://bit.ly/DGOWebSeries​ Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/Who Knew It with Matt Stewart: https://play.acast.com/s/who-knew-it-with-matt-stewart/ Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader ThomasDo Go On acknowledges the traditional owners of the land we record on, the Wurundjeri people, in the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders, past and present.  REFERENCES AND FURTHER READING:https://www.britannica.com/biography/George-M-Pullman#ref323216  https://www.glessnerhouse.org/glessner-family https://slate.com/technology/2014/06/nutshell-dioramas-of-death-frances-glessner-lee-forensic-science-and-training-crime-scene-investigators.htmlhttps://99percentinvisible.org/episode/the-nutshell-studies/https://www.harvardmagazine.com/2005/09/frances-glessner-lee-html  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Melbourne and Canada, we got exciting news for you. And we should also say this is 2026. Jess, what year is it? 2026. Thank God you're here. Right now, I'm in Melbourne doing my show with Serenji Amana, 630 each night at the Cooper's Inn Hotel, having so much fun. We'd love to see you there.

Canada, we are visiting you in September this year. If you've somehow missed the news, we are heading up Vancouver, Calgary, Montreal and Toronto for shows. That's going to be so much fun. Tickets for all this stuff, I believe, are online. And I'm here too. Hello and welcome to another episode of Dugo One. My name is Dave Warnocky and, as always, I'm here with Jess Perkins and Matt Stewart.

Hello, David. Hey, Dave, you know what they say about us? Jess Perkins, Perkins, perky by nature. Yes. Matt Stewart likes to eat stew sometimes. Yeah, they just say that. Wow. Yeah, did you know where they said that?

Loves to start wars. Yeah, he's a warmonger from Germany. Yeah, that's half true. you're from Germany No, I'm not You're a warmonger Okay Every day I learn more and more about you

Into our ninth year now Is that right? 10th year fucking I don't know Dave's more about He doesn't start like You know war wars But he does little Sort of intersocial group

Oh yeah He'll do little just Did you hear what Yeah Yeah Yeah What they said I did a lot of whispering

Behind my hand Yeah Absolutely Hey the movie The movie Bride Wars was actually inspired by Dave. He split up a few weddings. Initially, it was called Bride Warnockies.

Yeah. They were like, that's drawn that, yeah. Ugh, another Hollywood edit. Anyway, here we are. I would love, if you don't mind, to explain how this show works. Me? Me? Oh.

You do it. Someone's volunteering for ones to explain. I can do it. Yeah, great. Did we have a crack? I would love you too. Okay. Oh, God, okay, now I'm sweating.

All right. Okay. So, like, okay. Whatever. So there's three of us. That's Dave over there. He's the cute one. That's Matt.

Over there, he's the sassy one. And I'm Jess. I'm the girl. And that's my only personality trait. And we take it in turns researching topics, usually suggested by our listeners. We go away to our own separate homes. We research. We write up a report.

We bring it back to the other two who don't know what it is and we listen politely. It's Dave's turn this week. We couldn't be happier. He's the best in the biz. The biz being out of the three of us. It hurts every time. he is the best. And we always get on top it with a question. I don't, I used to sit back and say, yeah, he's the best, but I don't anymore. Now I think we're all the best in our own ways.

I'm the best of being a girl. I think you're even more than that, Jess, but I would say that I am a feminist. Don't push me. Just let me be. Okay, well, the listeners can't see that I was pushing you, so you've really put me in it now. We start with a question, Dave. My question is, Who are you? Jazz Perkins! Oh yeah, I'm going to have to pay that. By The Who was the theme song. CSI.

Miami. For what long-running TV show I have heard it is CSI, the original one, Matt. You're doing an episode about CSI? Yes, crime scene investigation. We had 15 glorious seasons and four incredible crossovers. I don't understand. Each more fantastic than the last. But I wager that the CSI Cinematic Universe, the CSI-CU, would never have existed

if not for today's topic, which is Francis Gleznor Lee, the mother of forensic science. Whoa. Jeez, that would have been a tough berth. Pushing out forensic science. Could I argue that I should... Hope it was a C-section. I'll tell you that much.

Yeah, bloody out. So the C-sense sensor and C-Sysa? I was hoping that you could argue that I deserve a point there because I did answer that question accurately. Who are you? Jess Perkins. Honestly, if you keep him... score at home, which you know, at least one person is.

Bob? Bob. Is it Bob? I think it's Bob. Bob? We just get an email twice a year from Bob with an update, so. I think it's Bob. I think it's Bob.

Bob, if you can hear me right now, give me a sign if it is Bob. Okay, I saw a little flutter. Yeah. A little dust flooded. I think that was Bob. Wasn't the aircon, that's for sure. Bob's powerful. Bob's speaking through dust.

That's nice. So yeah, I get a point for that, I tell you both a point for that. Because I am Jess Perkins. Bob, that's just a point for me. Let's take it seriously. But have we heard of Francis Glistenerly? Of course. You just mentioned them.

Yes, I hadn't before. No, I have not either. Beautiful name, glisten. You know what I was told years ago? Women don't sweat. They glisten. And I think maybe is that going to come up in this report? Is that where it comes from?

Yeah. Very sweaty woman. Glistening. I'm glistening. A woman trying to rebrand sweat. It's not sweat. It's glitter. I'm sparkling.

Are this topic to been suggested by a few people? Max Edmonds from Bristol, Amy Schaumburg from Chuella, Washington. My goodness. And Hunter Hanson from Dallas, Texas. H. H.E.C. Cool. Yeah, thank you so much. Let me tell you about Francis Glezzan Lee, who was born in Chicago.

The Windy City. The Windy City. Thank you so much. He waits. He knows. On March 25, 1878. Now, she was born into a very, very wealthy family. Her father formed International Harvester, which was a manufacturer of agricultural. and construction equipment, now known as Navistar International Corporation,

it became the fourth largest corporation in the country. Made the big four. Big four. So, I found me very wealthy. When you said he formed International Harvester, I was singing a supergroup. That's so good. He was on keys. Yeah.

Now, you know you're wealthy when your house is so big and historic that one day it is turned into a national historic landmark and museum, which the John J. Glesner House has been. Wow. Glezner House was where our topic, Francis Glezzan Lee, was brought up. It was designed by one of America's most famous architects, Henry Hobson Richardson. And his style is known as the super catchy Richardsonian Romanesque. Beautiful.

And so their home has been turned into like a museum. Yeah. That'd be really annoying for my neighbours because I live in an apartment building. And so it's like people charging admission to get into that apartment. But also imagine how to time. party'd have to keep it. I'm assuming you're still living there. I'm still living there. It's just people having a look at my house. It's a living museum. Look, there she is. I'm just making a cupper.

Yeah, this is my kitchen. This is a sink. Yep. Great. That's my dog. He is very distressed with all the people coming in and gone. The landlord's just trying to get a new tenant in and you're like in denial. Oh, you've got a few more people want to see the museum. Always nice to meet some fans. Come on in. Cash only, please. Thank you. I will be accepting questions.

Dave, I think I just heard that the name is, what is it, Gleznor? Gleznor. Okay, it's quite a margin away from Gleason, which I thought it was. So what I said before, don't worry about it. So discount that from the record? Yeah. Happy to do that for you. So the Gleznor residence, which is this massive place, was Richardson's,

that's the guy that is, the architect. Richardsonian, Henry Hobson, Richardson's last work. He died three weeks after its completion at the age of 48, and it does feel a bit like the building killed him. But in fact, it was kidney disease. Oh, okay. That he got from the building. I was looking into because I was like,

did something happen with this building? But no, apparently he died very young, sadly because of that. Wow. His Wikipedia page writes, despite an enormous income for an architect of his day, his, quote, reckless disregard financial order

meant that he died deeply in debt, leaving little to his widow and six children. Shit. So he just spent it up whilst he was around. You can't take it with you. Can't take it with you. but you probably should leave some for your kids. Leave some for the kids.

There's a... Some, but, you know... Sounds like you left some debt for them. Oh, that's nice. It's something to remember him, but... Yeah. They're like... A burden.

Dad, you can't take your debt with you, and he was like, I know. Yeah. This is awesome. The John J. Glesner House was built in a very well-to-do neighborhood, full of newly minted industrialists, the house's own website.

Imagine a house as a website. It writes, following the great chicken... I'm easily impressed. Oh, like, what is going on? Imagine. Anyone can have a website about anything, Dave. It's really easy.

Thanks to our sponsors at Squarespace. Yeah, that's right. And we've set up jess's apartment.com. This is what it says on the website. Following the Great Chicago Fire, a six-block section of Prairie Avenue served as the residents of many of Chicago's elite families, including nearly 90 mansions that earned it the name

the Sunny Street that held the sifted few. Oh, my God. that's so catchy. That's beautiful. The sunny street that held the sifted few. That's one of the worst sentences I've ever heard. I don't understand any of it. And yet proving you can put anything on your own website.

Cased in granite, the house is like a fortress or a castle. And the design was very different from other houses on the elite Prairie Avenue. And not everyone liked it. This interview feels like it comes from a very old episode of Grand Designs, where the neighbours are always pissed off about whatever they're building. Railroad sleeping car CEO, George Pullman, who lived across the street in a traditional second empire mansion, said, I don't know what I have ever done to have that thing staring me in the face every time I go out of my door. Pullman, that's, that's a, he's big time.

Big time. I don't know if you remember a few weeks ago when I was talking about, uh, the one of the guys involved in the, the lake George Monster. Oh, yeah. He sold, he sold his, um, his luxurious. Sleeping cars. Sleeping cars. Sleeping cars. That was his thing, yeah.

Oh. There you go. Wow. And so he says, I don't know what I did to deserve to do that. I do know what he did. George Pullman was a piece of shit. Okay. I was like, I'm going to look into this guy.

Oh, my God. Struggling to maintain profitability during an 1894 Dan Turn in manufacturing demand, Pullman decided to half wages and required workers to spend long hours at the plant, but did not lower prices of rents and goods in his company town. Britannica writes, for those who lived in the town, Wages beyond rent had been barely enough to live on even in prosperous times. Now there was hardly anything left afterward. So these oppressive economic conditions ultimately led to the Pullman strike,

which was very influential on American labor laws as basically a large section of the country's transit, the trans completely ground to a halt. Because they all said, I'm not working for you right now. Pullman gained presidential support from Grover Cleveland for the use of federal Royal Military Troops, which left 30 strikers dead in the violent suppression of workers to end the strike. Shit. What a piece of shit.

Yeah. Yeah. I don't know how he thought that would help. I mean, I know how he thought it would help, but he just didn't see his workers as humans. Yes, exactly. Wild. And when he died, if he... I get it.

I don't see you guys as humans. Do you see us as your workers? Yeah. There's a hierarchy that do go on. I know, technically, on all the official paperwork. We're all co-directors, but I think we know who's really running the show. Your 33.33% is a little bit bigger than our 33.33%. That's right.

So when this guy died a few years later, having returned his business to thriving prosperity, he remained exceedingly rich. His Wikipedia writes, he had fears that some of his former employees or other labor supporters might try to dig up his body. So his family arranged for his remains to be placed in a lead-lined mahogany coffin, which was then sealed inside a block of concrete. At the cemetery, a large pit had been dug at the family plot. At its basin walls were 18 inches of reinforced concrete.

The coffin was lowered and covered with asphalt and tar paper. More concrete was poured on top, followed by a layer of steel rails bolted together at right angles and another layer of concrete. The entire burial process took two days. Dave, this is wild. You know that that has come up on an episode recently as well? in block,

do you remember that Lincoln's body ended up getting buried in concrete? Because he got, because they were copying a guy who was worried about his body being dug up. Is this him? That's him.

No. Isn't that wild? That's wild. I'll try not to stop you every couple of minutes from going, oh, Pullman's,

he's related. I didn't know he was an asshole until now. But those, yeah, those are too recent. That were two recent. That were two reasons from the last couple of months. Yeah.

That never twigged for me. I'm sorry. So I do remember that Lincoln, you know, they decided, let's never let this happen again. Yeah. Let's seal him in. Yeah. But I forgot that he's-copy Pullman. But this guy's so worried about it because he knows he's been such a prick. Yeah, he knows.

It's not even like, that's so funny, isn't it? It's so funny. It's like, I've been such an asshole. They're going to do weird shit to my body. Also, you're dead. Yeah. Who cares? But yeah, okay, cover yourself in concrete.

I'm sorry for what I did. It's like, I know I did real bad stuff. So I just dip me in. A lot of people are really. mad at me, so let's make sure they cannot get to my body. I feel like, you know, let them have me. I was rough to them. I'll be dead.

If it makes them feel better, let them chop me up or something. I feel like if you really want to avoid it, just go cremation. Yeah. Sorry, guys. Surely that was around. All right. We've been cremating for ages. Yeah.

Haven't we? Some people, well, I think there's different religious beliefs back when they didn't think that was the way to go. Yeah. Do you reckon you're able to get to heaven if you're covered in 38 meters of concrete? Yeah. How's your soul getting out? It's difficult to get out.

Yeah, that's true. So in life, I'm pleased to say he had to look at a giant house across the street that he hated. So at least there was some suffering. Yeah, what a detour we just went on. That was fun. So the Glevna house, it's this massive thing. It had three bedrooms for family use, which sounds quite modest. But it also had two for guests and eight for servants.

So 13 bedrooms in total. It's quite a big house. Oh, that's unlucky. Oh, yeah. It's nice that the servants get their own rooms. I imagine they're all. And not just like, I don't know, just like fucking crawl up on a little bag of and bobbing of tails. Sorry what?

Well, a little blah. Tiles. Little, well, a tile. I was having somebody else. I was like, oh, no. A little blah, but, remember all the tiles. We suddenly joined by Southern Bell. My back's quite wet.

Would you be able to send in a couple of fresh tiles? My back's quite wet. What is you back with? The sweaty down there on the mouth. I was walking through this Texan son. A little old me. Is that where, is that Texas was where the southern bells are from? I think there's a bunch of, the South's spot big.

I was trying to say pile of tails. I always pictured them further. I don't know where I pictured. I think they didn't have a lot of Tennessee. You can say only say one. any so he's like oh northern scotland you can be southern for anywhere it's really a state of mind they move they travel these bells

quite wealthy some of them francis glasnolet who is the main topic we'll get to her in a minute but her father john who's the very very rich guy is described by the family website as imagine your house has a website yeah a prolific writer producing many short pieces relating family history including a tribute to his wife after her death as well there's more obscure topics like potatoes and snakes. Sure, you've got to cover all bases.

Yeah. I couldn't believe that that was worth noting. I'm interested in potatoes. And snakes. Yeah. Yeah, snakes, too a lesser degree. But do you feel like, like, is a story about it? Is potato an obscure topic?

I guess back then, maybe. Maybe it was. But they weren't, like, they're an American vegetable as well, so not even obscure. Yeah. They're an American vegetable? Yeah, I think I learned that recently from Bill Bryson. That, isn't it funny, like, tomatoes as well and avocados and stuff? So it's so funny that.

So, like, so North America is what you mean, right? Yeah, North America. Including Mexico and things like that, right? Yes, that's right. The North American content. But it's so funny to think of, like, dishes around the world that it seemed like Italian food, you can't picture without tomatoes. Yeah.

But they only have had it for, you know, a few hundred years. Well, they've mastered it, though, haven't they? Yeah. But Americans just making ketchup. The Italians, they're like, no, no, no, we'll make some Pasada. Thank you very much. I think there's a bit of an irony when Italians are like the Americans don't, they can't make pizza. Pizza's ours.

Like, well, tomatoes is theirs. Yeah. So what are you going to do? What are you going to do? You know? You're going to make potato pizza? Tomatoes is theirs. Tomatoes is theirs, okay?

Don't even bother reply. Yeah. Dave, sometimes your drama degree really comes out. Because you've done two characters today where I'm looking at you the whole time. and I lose you. Like Dave disappears and the character emerges. Yeah. You look, you transport everything.

It's amazing. Beautiful to watch. I think it is beautiful and he's an artist. I've been traveling bell and also annoyed Italian. What are you going to do? Wait, wait, you're American Italian? Yeah, an American Italian. American Italian.

Yeah, yeah. That was beautiful. What are you going to do? At the mother's that. So what are you going to do? What are you going to do? So that's a lot of that. Her mother was Francis McBeth Glezner.

Incredible. Love that name. Francis McBeth Glezner, who kept a diary for 40 years, and her husband, who I said loved her write, he did because he frequently wrote her diary for her when she was ill. And imagine he's writing stuff like, John is so great.

I love John. I love John, John, John, John, John's my best friend. Three cheers, hi, John. Now, this is how the website describes Francis Macbeth. She was also a Silver Smith, accomplished pianist, an avid knitter. She also gave away many of her silver pieces as gifts and purportedly knitted more than 500 sweaters for children,

employees and servicemen. As for silver, her pieces bear her hallmark, a G, encircling a honeybee, iconography for another interest, beekeeping. She also attended all rehearsals and performances given by the Chicago Symphony Orchestra, one of her greatest passion. She's doing a lot of hobbies. I guess you can knit sweaters while watching orchestras, So maybe there's a few that you could knock off and then give away silver at the end of it. They didn't have TV. Right. I think if you don't have TV, you really, you find there's a lot more hours in the day.

What was her main gig? Well, as we're about to discover, in this family especially, women not really allowed to pursue a career of sorts. Okay. But she sounds like she made hobbies a career. Yes, that's right, doing lots and lots of different things on the side. And also a very practical woman, which might influence her daughter. Let's talk about her now. Their daughter and our actual report topic, Francis Glezzanley, came along in 1878.

The youngest child and only daughter of the family, nicknamed Fanny as a kid. She was homeschooled by Tudors just like her older brother George. Which is, Fanny is funny to us because of what it means, but in America it just means ass. Yeah. It's not funny. They've just called their daughter, ass. Whereas here it means front ass. As a feminist.

Can I say front ass as a feminist? I don't think you can. I think as a feminist, you have to say. the word. Volvo? Yeah. Front vulva. Front vulva.

You think of the butt as the back vulva? I think of the butt as the back fanny. The back fanny. Yes. Right. Which is, I think, must have been where I got confused between, you know, English and Australians, I think we use fanny for the front and Americans use it for the back. So a fanny pack to us is a bum bag.

Yes. You know, I love culture. It's beautiful. That is confusing because even though usually you'll have. your bum bag at the front, not around the back. Which I think this is probably where the confusion came. Yes. So people are going, it's a bum bag and they go, oh, they must just say bum for the front.

So Fannie must be the back. Yeah, it's very confusing. Fannie became the back in America. Yeah, my gosh. I remember Marge Simpson saying to one of the kids, something about being on your Fanny. I'm like, Starfish on the Fanny. You're like, Marge, what the fuck are you told you? What the hell, Mudge?

Jeez, March. Jeez. My God. My God. God. This show has really gone to the dogs. This usually fantastic family show. Wonderful program.

I wasn't allowed to watch it for a long time. Well, because of such saucy stuff like... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Our parents were hearing Fanny on Starfish on the Fanny. No, no, no, no, no. Excuse me? Not for my little angel. Anyway, so they've named her daughter. Fanny.

Fanny, exactly. And being a woman, sorry, Fanny. I'll get the two confused. And being a woman, especially of her family, like I said, she was expected to grow up and be a society. Lady. Yes, very important job. Her brother went to Harvard University. Sorry?

Sorry, I actually don't know how to say this word. Can you look at it on my screen? How do I say that? Harvard. University, thank you so much. Haven. Harvard. You know this word as well?

Well, I learned it from Jess. Haven. Haven. Haven. Haven. So, brother went there. George went there. But many places reference her father is saying,

quote, a lady doesn't go. Father. Father. He said, quote, a lady doesn't go to school. Yes. Gentleman never sheds a lady, you never go to school. Yeah. Art from the same era.

Yeah. So we're getting a rough idea of how I existed in the same era. Yes, of course. That's true. Instead, Francis learned things like sewing, embroidery and painting. And importantly, the art of miniatures. Yes. Making intricate dolls, houses and scenes. Apparently making these miniature scenes was a very popular hobby at the time.

Okay. Sort of try and create ultra-realistic scenes. scenarios. Again, no TV. No TV. No video games. No Sims. What?

If I didn't have the Sims, I've been playing since I was 11. Fuck the hours I'd get back. That's what they were doing there. They were building the Sims. Yeah. And then setting fire to the room and watching whatever. Sims is basically just modern miniatures. I guess so yes.

Ha! How about that? Wow. I remember I used to work at a supermarket and I was a teenager. And there was this one of the managers, we were going to to see a band or something. And he was a bit older. So I'm like, this guy's real cool, you know.

Nice. Get to his place, pre-drinks. And he's just packing away the miniature army people he's been painting. We like, huh? Oh, no. I'm just like, well, he's cool. That's cool. You know, that's sort of, I wasn't judging, but I was surprised.

I think, you know, you become less judgmental as you get. get older or I have. Yeah, we've grown. I know you, Dave, are more and more judgmental as you get older, but. That's true? I hope. I don't think so. But no, it is funny.

I cannot walk down the street without Dave comment, like, going like, that top with those shoes. Oh my God. Yeah, he always refers to people as honey. Yeah. It's very strange. It's weird. Honey, no.

Because it feels like, honey, Dave, you can't talk like that. You know what I mean? Babe, you can't talk about that. Yeah, I can't say honey. Babe, you can't pull that off. You wish you could pull that off. So, Francis wanted to be a doctor or a nurse, or in her own words, do something in my lifetime that should be of significant value to the community.

Wow, that's nice, especially for such a rich person to be, like, thinking about other people. Yes, the community. Yeah. I want to help people. What? They usually think of them as workers and not people. Yeah. But she was forbidden from all such pursuits.

Yeah, that makes sense. Imagine her society friends got wind of this. She wants to help the greater good. Shut it down. Without irony? Maybe like a dinner for schmucks type scenario. We'll feed some fool, but we'll be laughing at it.

Do you mean you want to throw a really fancy sullet that looks really good for you, but we could say we're doing it for charity? Is that what do you mean? Because that I can get on board with, sure. A cotillion? I still don't really know what that means. It was from the OC, though. Which is most of your knowledge of everything.

Everything rich, everything poor. Wow. Both sides of the tracks. Yeah, Chino. Hey, Chino. That show had everything. Welcome to the OC, bitch. Yeah.

Is what I would say, when I meet you there one day. Yeah. That's a great line. In 1898, at the age of 20, she married lawyer Bluett Harrison Lee. Blewett. First name Bluett. Blueet. Bluet.

How's that spell? B-L-E. W-E-D-T. Blewett. That's the same as Greg Bluett. Greg Bluett. But surname Bluett, it's incredible. First-Name Bluett?

Greg Bluett is one of the great names. Greg Blewett. But Blewett, first name, is that better or worse? I don't know. I don't know either. I'm confused by this. Goes in reverse order of surname, half-sername, first-name, first-name. Blewett-Harrison Lee.

Oh, yeah, that's a reverse name. He's got a reverse name. Can you do it? He should be Lee-Harrison-Bluet. He should be Lee-Harrison. That is a. a much better name. That is a much better name. Can we fix that? In post history? Yeah, let's fix that now. Let's go back in time. Get the DeLorean. Let's go. And I'm sorry to say that

Francis Klezner, Lee, that's where the Lee comes from, married Blewett Harrison Lee, not Lee Harrison Blewett. Lee Harrison Blewett. She blewitt. She's a fucking blue it. This is my husband, Blewett. Like, how could you say that seriously? Yeah, come on. Hello, I have an appointment. What was your name? Blewett. No, sorry, your first name. Yes, that is my first name. And what's your surname? I'm sorry, you've got this wrong way around.

Answering the phone. Hello, Bluitt speaking. Like, how do you take yourself seriously? You're saying it like Bluett, comma, Lee? You're not saying your first name is actually Bluett. That's impossible. Yes, I am saying my first name is Bluett. Why, why do you ask?

Oh, my God. And he was a lawyer too. He'd have no idea. This guy. She's sweet. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him.

I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. Dave, do we hate him? Dave, do we hate him? We hate him. They had three children together. We hate him for that.

And we hate them too. No, we don't. We hate the children. They are related to blew it. I didn't have any record of their names. They were probably her awful name. Yeah, they've got blue of blood in them. I hate them.

They're half blew it. So I half hate them. So that's her husband. It was actually a friend of her brother that would introduce her to her lifelong passion. A medical examiner by the name of George McGrae introduced her to the then-fledgling world of forensic investigation. Already a fan of Sherlock Holmes, when George visited the family home and told her about the cases he was working on, Francis was absolutely fascinated. Couldn't get enough. I love how Sherlock Holmes has influenced, like, real world. Yeah.

Yeah, because before that, a lot of people weren't thinking in that way to solve a crime. And you did do a whole episode about Sherlock Holmes and the go. And Arthur Conan Doyle, that's right. But did Arthur Conan Doyle take anything from the real world, or did he fully invent these things in his stories? Do you remember? I think there's a bit of both. So he was like not a detective.

He was a doctor by trade, medical doctor. And I think some of the Sherlock is was from memory based on someone that he knew in his life. But I think a lot of the scenarios and the way that he would, you know, detect. Yeah. And breakdown clues were. So good. We're wholly new. And they went, we got to say,

they weren't the first detective stories. Right. We know that Edgar Allan Poe is actually often credited with being the first detective story. The Rue Morg. That's right. Murder in the Rue Morg that we covered on booksheet. I thank God because you were both looking at me and I was like, I don't know. You don't know what you're talking about.

The fact that I could remember Rue Morgue. That's good. Very impressive. Good stuff. George McGarer actually later, who's the friend that would come around and tell her about the cases he's working on things he's studying. He later became Boston's chief medical examiner and became very famous in the field. It was like at the time, it's really. only just taking off.

And he peaked the interest of young Francis, but because of her conservative family, she was unable to pursue this fascination with any formal education. So she very quietly read about science and crime scenes, sometimes even visiting crime scenes to further her own private research, which sounds pretty full of.

Say that again. She would just go to crime scenes, just out of interest. And just examine and have a look. Have a look. I mean, how else you learn? Yeah. I think I... Good question.

And we'll answer. to that. I miss heard slightly. I was thinking you were saying that she was creating crime scenes. Yeah. Honestly, when I first read that too, I was like, hang on, you know how often, you know, like there's an arsonist or something. Yeah. The person who comes to, you know, it turns out that. They're in the volunteer firefighter. Yeah. Things like that or like on, I'm sure on a bunch of the CSI NCIS crime shows. There are things where it's like, hang on, actually, it was the cop all along who liked to stage these scenes. It felt like that, but don't worry. She's not a killer. Okay. Yet.

What is she? Which kind of crime does she do? In 1914, 16 years into what has been described as an unhappy marriage, Francis and Blewett divorced. Could they do that? Yes, but it was very controversial at the time, particularly in her echelon of society, and she was dependent on her wealthy but very conservative family from that point on. Right.

But I think she made the right call. Yeah. Cut out, Blewett. Yeah. I don't know. I just think he had so many opportunities to. make their marriage work. But what did you do?

He muffed it. Yeah. He did. I don't know how else to say it. Yeah. We still was another term. We've worked together for too long that now, like, it's the easiest alleyup ever. I'm just like, okay, here we go.

And there we're, yep, we've done it. Muffet is actually probably a better name than Blue. Muffed it. Mofted. Mofted. Hello, Muffet speaking, that's fine. I don't say quite like Muffed it, but blew it. I cannot get on board.

I quite like Moftet. Little Muffet Warnockie. Hey, who knows? I have for a boy or girl. Muffed it. Muffed it. A little muffy. Muffie.

Muffy. Muffy. That's nice. In England, I think that means the front. We can't travel there anymore. So that was 1914 and then she sort of lived a pretty, by all accounts, pretty quiet family life. But 15 years later, her older brother George died in 1929 following appendicitis and pneumonia.

Then her mother died in 1932 and her father in 1936 just before his 93rd birth. And you're swearing she's not a killer. Well, he was 93. Okay. The perfect crime. No one will suspect a thing. And being the sole heir, Francis Glezzanley inherited the lot. Oh, my.

My goodness. And now... That's motive. You would say that. And now 54 years old, she was suddenly phenomenally wealthy and more importantly, finally able to spend it on whatever she wanted. Sweeters. She's getting back in the meeting game. No, that was her mom.

Yeah, my mom love the sweater. She's like, throw that out. Yeah. Wow, that's exciting for her. I mean, obviously, she probably is missing her family, but be fun to not be a prisoner. in your own home anymore. Yeah. Do you reckon?

I imagine. Okay. So now, so much money, more than you can ever spend. She immediately thought of the stories that George McGrath are the medical examines to tell her. Slate writes in an article that I will link to in the show notes that George would complain that the murders too often went unsolved because detectives, misinterpreted or tampered with evidence or coroners with no medical training botched the autopsies. The incredibly named Bruce Goldfarb.

Come on. Come on. Bruce Goldfab. I think you were at Bruce Goldf- and I'm like, I assume I know where this is going. Yeah. I did not know where I was going. No, a barb with a be on the end.

It was a spokesperson for the Maryland medical examiner's office. He told us late in that article, investigators used to do dumb things. They would walk through blood, move bodies, and put their fingers through bullet holes in clothing. You imagine just walking to a crime scene and just stepping through the blood. Sort of, oh, what's that? Put my finger in that.

Yep. I'll have a lick of that. Fantastic. Got to get all the senses involved. Sniff this. Stick a wound in my ear. Hard to do. I can hear this wound.

I can hear the sea. There's the ocean in this dead man. The ocean did it. Case closed. That's how bad. He drowned. He's like miles inland. Dramed at sea.

Draft. Oh, well. No recovery of the body. Open and closed. Poirot, this man drowned at sea. Yeah, they're standing next to Uluru or something. It's like, it's a long way from the ocean, Poirot. That's the ocean.

I can hear it. I don't know what more evidence you need. And autopsies were often completed by people with no specialist training at all. And things were routinely missed. And Francis, our newly minted wealthy and independent woman, wanted to change all of that. She thought if only these people were educated and taught to think about forensics and crime scenes,

then they'd have a much better chance of solving the cases. So in 1936, she put her money where her mouth was and donated a sizable sum of money to Harvard to establish the first program. Sorry, I've missed... Jess has given me another look here. I was looking at Max. I was like, did you understand anything?

I was well, I'm quite sure what he said. Must be like a community college. I've realized what I've done here because I've said the word wrong. Okay. In 1936, she donated a size-all sum of money to, sorry, again, this word. Oh, have it. Thank you. Haven. Thank you. Everyone's getting that.

And there she established the first program of legal medicine. Oh. She basically said, here's a few million dollars. Let's set this up. Her old inspiration, George McGrath, was the first professor of legal medicine, and Francis also set up the George Burgess McGra, she's named after him, Library of Legal Medicine and the United States first forensic pathology program. Wow.

That's very nice if her to name a library after him. Yeah, even though she's paid for everything. I suppose he's the one that inspired her and also talked her through the cases, educated her a lot when she wasn't allowed to have form. A beautiful tribute. Would you like me to name a library after you? Yeah, well, if I ever teach you something, so maybe not.

Yeah, probably not. Probably I'll name a bloody toilet after you, mate. Bit rich coming from someone who has had a toilet named after. And it's an honour. I was delighted to go take a piss in my toilet. Okay. So I would love to give you the same. You could name a urinal after me, sure, but a gentleman never shit.

That's right. Are you shrinal? That's nice. You are the pun master. That's classy. Was that a pun? No, I think that's a pun, you shrinal. That's classy as hell.

Yeah, rarely a pun is so classy if that was in fact a pun. It's so classy it makes me think it couldn't have been. But I'm not sure. I don't know. You Shrinal. She also set up the first, I'm saying this right? Harvard. Oh, yes, closer.

Yeah. The first Harvard seminars in homicide investigation. And then also this university, Harvard, has a magazine which paid tribute to her legacy in 2005. And they're right, she presided over the seminars in grand fashion, the only woman among 30 or 40 men, giving banquets at the Ritz Carlton for the participating detectives and medical examiners. personally overseeing elaborate menus, floral arrangements, table settings. So she's putting the money forward for the educational stuff, but also having these big seminars and also basically doing the party planning for that as well.

Well, she's doing what she knows and what her family taught her to do because that's all she was allowed to do. It's all she's allowed to do. But it sounds like she's sort of, I don't know, building communities as well in a way. Like getting all these people together. And some of the stuff that her family taught her also is going to come in handy here. because Francis wanted to educate police and investigators about best practice at a crime scene. And also to use critical thinking when they were there, study every element in order to try and deduce what's actually happened. Not just go for the obvious.

Yeah, try to get the little grey cells involved. Exactly, yes. Thank you. But it's obviously pretty tricky for multiple classes of people to visit actual crime scenes. Kind of like what you were saying before, mate. It's difficult to just go out to one. Yeah, how do you find a crime scene? I've never seen one.

Yeah. Especially if you've got like a whole class, you know, 20 new detective. You've got a bus full of people. You're just driving around trying to find a crime scene. You guys sitting in your murders around here? No? Eventually you're going to have to start committing crimes. Yeah.

Well, so she decided to put her skills to the test and create the next best thing, miniature models of crime scenes. It's cool. Oh my God. These were based on actual cases, but Glezzanally had a lot of creative license with interiors and the characters she put on display in these little scenes. And she called each of these little snapshots of crime,

nutshells. All the clues were contained within the nutshell, and this led to the scenes to be referred to as, which I'll call this week's episode, the nutshells of unexplained death. Whoa. That rules. Yeah.

That is, I don't, I don't even know how to get all that in my head. We've broken that. Because that is, that is quite a sentence. What was that sentence from earlier? That was the worst of all time? Yeah, this is the best of all time. This might be the best of all time. Oh my God, we've done it.

We've done both in one episode. I can't ever remember that one. It was something about the sifted people of society on the sunny street. Oh yeah. It was awful. Shut up. Shut the fuck up. I hated that sentence.

I want that sentence to die. Yeah. I want that sentence to come to life and die a painful death. You want that sentence to suffer. Yeah. It deserves it. Where is this one about the nutshells of whatever? That was the best.

That's incredible. Memorable. The nutshells of unexplained death. That rules. And there weren't just any diaramas. They were painstakingly created with an incredible amount of detail and therefore realism. Francis came up with the concept and then had a carpenter build the mini rooms at a scale of one inch to one foot. Okay.

Which is difficult for us in the metric system to sort of imagine. But, you know, I'm thinking of a six inch sub. The Raltuskut. It's 12 inches to a foot, right? Yep. It's just one to 12, I think. Oh, so like a foot long. Yeah.

I feel like, no matter what said you were going to say, like a foot long. What have they got like an animatronic sort of stuff involved and stuff? Yeah, that's what I was thinking. Is it battery operated? No, there's no electronics. Is there a beating heart underneath the floorboards, a tel-ta? our heart, so to speak. I'm afraid not.

Wow. Together, her and the builder would create full rooms with working windows, locks, doors with accompanying tiny keys. Oh my God. Wow. She's made crime adorable. Yeah. They'd build the room and then it was then over to Francis herself to fill the room

with textiles and figures, creating curtains, rugs and tiny sets of clothes, including stockings that she would hand knit with pins because they were so small. Just bringing in all these skills. Exactly. It's all coming together. Wow. She would knit for a few seconds until her eyes hurt because, you know, it was so small and she's in her mid-50s.

So she was sort of really straining. So she'd do a few seconds, look away, go back, and keep going until she created an entire set of tiny stockings. But she thought of everything. Tiny burnt cigarettes left on a table in one of the diaramas are actually tiny cigarettes that she hand rolled and then burnt and then put out. Calendors displayed the correct date of when the victim died. Wow. In one of the nutshells, a miniature rocking chair rocks exactly three times when it is pulled back to a 95 degree angle.

Francis had got a local craftsman to create the chair, but had sent it back when it didn't rock exactly the amount of times a real rocking chair that she'd once seen at a crime scene did. So she was a perfectionist. Yeah. Well, it seems like some of these things aren't super necessary, but I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it, but I question it a little. Maybe there could be some focus elsewhere, but I love it.

I just think, like, she did have some children. Did she want to spend any time with them? It's starting to sound like, no. Yeah. I think they might be all, they're all sort of growing up now. I assume so, yeah, but you can visit them. You know, you could get them on the blower. Yeah, no one never mentions the children.

I've got to say, a fingernail-sized mouse trap actually worked. What? That is incredible. Which would take out the tiniest place. There is, like, I don't know if I've seen it in a while, but there used to be these semi-viral videos that go around of people with these tiny little kitchens and cooking tiny pancakes and like genuine things. Yeah, I kind of love that. That's fun. That is fun.

That is fun. But tedious. It's kind of like, just. And pointless. Pointless. But, I mean, what isn't pointless? Yeah. Well.

Really boil it down. It's kind of like, imagine that, but just that kitchen is covered in fake blood. That's what she's made. Yeah. I mean, what we're doing right now is pointless. I know. As I said, I remembered. You could argue it is.

Everything is pointless. Yeah. Except love. In a different way, everything's full of point. Holy shit. Except love. Except love. Oh, what a waste of time.

Yeah, it is a waste of time. Hey, life is what gets in the way when you make plans or whatever John Lennon said. Yeah, that's nice. What a poet. Matt Stewart. Yeah. Well, I took what John Lennon said and I made it better. Yeah.

You've been doing that your whole. life. Yeah. So there you go. Thanks, John. So Francis contended that if they weren't 100% believable, then the police study wouldn't take them seriously and learn what needed to be learned. So that's why she went above and beyond to make them really, really deep.

If we want the police to really respect us, we need these dollhouses to be spot on. Yeah. Okay. You want to be taken seriously in this biz, you're going to make a tiny little jacket. Okay. Jesus Christ We don't want to be a laughing stock When the sergeant comes around

And he sees that The rocking chair is slightly skew with You call that a thatched roof You're embarrassing yourself I'm not even going to try and attempt to solve this crime You don't make dinner tables out of that kind of timber Come on The grain's running the wrong way for God's sake

These chairs are different I only have to believe that there's a room between The way you eat the meals and the kitchen I mean, it makes just, it just makes no sense. That's not up to code. Pull it down, start again. Yeah, that was the first ever blooper and I'm actually section. Actually, I think we'll find.

This is a big goof. So that's the setting. There were also dead bodies in there. Oh, real ones. Yeah, really, really tiny ones. She shrunk them down. She made tiny people and then she killed them. It's a truly psycho.

No, there were these little fake bodies. So I'm happy to say. They were precisely positioned, some shown to have rigor mortis, bloating and discoloration. Wow. Blood, splatter patterns, and angles of stab wounds were studied and displayed in accurate detail. And as you can imagine, some are pretty grim and grizzly, and they depict hangings, stabbing's death from fire, people who have died from falls. Wow. So it's like, these are like kind of nightmare dolls houses.

According to Slate, each model costs between $3,000 and $4,000 to create, which in the 1940s was similar to what a full-size house would cost to build. Why are they costing so much? She's an absolute millionaire, and she's just spending... So much. Yeah, just to get a precise. Yeah, like, processman to make the rocking chair, I guess. He's like charging full price.

You know, it probably takes him a week. Yeah. Because she's so precise, and it comes back and she goes, no, do it again. And in terms of, like, the fabric she's choosing to decorate, she's going for, like, designer brands and so she's buying full-size rolls of and stuff and just cutting a tiny little corner of it. She's sending people to China.

I'm not to buy the best silk. Yeah, that's right. Just making kitchen bench tops out of crushed Faberjeet eggs. Yeah. It's ridiculous. Well, they make for the best bench top. See, those bricks, those are actually gold bricks that we spray painted with terracotta colors. So, it's wild.

It would cost the same as it would cost to build a house. She would create up to three in one year because it would take so long to make. And in total, she made 20. That's amazing. Which is the cost of 20 houses. But yeah, they all have a descriptive name. and some of them include this is some of the names. Log cabin.

Blue bedroom. Burned cabin. Pink bathroom. Woodman's shack. Barn. All very cryptic. Yeah. Can't figure them out.

Can't crack these codes. Just old-timey words I don't understand. Saloon and jail. Okay. Striped bedroom. Living room. Two-story porch and garage. Garage.

Garage. Garage. So what you're saying basically is to help the greater good, she's spending what she could be on giving people livable houses on little tiny houses. And if they weren't such a success, I'd be like, what a waste of money. But as we're about to hear, they are very influential. Well, she, like she could have given what, 20 people, 20 families a house that year, but instead she changed the game.

Exactly. Of crime. You give one person a house, they have one house. Yeah. But you make a miniature house. You've changed the game forever. Yeah. Is that how that phrase goes?

Yeah. That's how that phrase goes. I think that's what Jesus meant. With the fish or whatever. Yeah, yeah. Sorry, Jesus, if you don't know, he's a carpenter. I once knew. Oh, okay, great.

Where's talking about tradies you've met? It's weird. Steve the plumber. Good guy. Good guy. Greg and Sparky. Rock solid guy, Greg. Yeah.

We had a Sparky, which for internationalism is an electrician. Is that not an... Of course it is. Is it really? Yeah, yeah. That seems English to me. Oh, yeah, it could be, but Americans would call them an electrician. Oh, okay.

And, you know, other people. Weird country. Other people who maybe English isn't their first language. That's so. And they hear sparking. I don't know what this is. I really hope they've got a funny. I'm going to look up American nickname for, I bet it's something more gibberish than that.

Yeah. Anyway, we had, when we were renovating our house, there was an electrician there. Sorry, by we and house, I mean, my parents' house. I don't know, own a house. They were renovating. My brother was the builder on site, and the electrician was a guy named Dodgey. Who was very good at his work.

Who should I make this checkout too? Dodgy? Dodgy? Sure, no worries. Fantastic. Do we have any verdict on nicknames for electricians in the United States of America? I feel like they just call them what they are. Yeah, maybe.

Yeah, Sparky's coming up a lot, but I think it's not for America. I think it's for British Commonwealth it's saying. Yeah. But yeah, nothing for American nickname. Well, I'm looking forward to the tweets. I'll say that much. Yeah, please. Genuinely, Americans, let us know.

What do you call? I say tweets like I'm the oldest man in the world now. No one's tweeting anymore. No. I've Googled electrician nickname, and this website called top nickname.com came up, and it says, top nicknames for electrician. Sparky.

Okay? Yep. Vultra lord Okay Shocker That was an electrician Wanting to get Voltra Lord started

Yeah You know Break a bad Wizard Okay And what about this one Electrician Oh okay

That one I don't understand That makes some sense to me If you think about it How did we get on to this? I think you were talking about an electrician Yeah but why did I talk about an electrician Oh That's a point

The last thing I read out was that one of the places is called Garage. Wow, we took that for a walk. I have no idea where I went with that. I'm so sorry. I've just come to, to be honest. Dave, please do go on. So each of the scenes comes with a bit of background that was given to the person studying the scene, as if they were a police officer happening upon the crime in real life.

They get a witness statement and other details about the deceased, like in real life, might inform the investigation. The people studying the scene were then asked to determine if it was murder, suicide, death by natural cause or accident. Right, so there's only four options. They've invented Cludo. Yeah. Honestly, it's like a very, very expensive 3D Cluto. It was Professor Mustard in the conservatory with the candlestick.

Professor Mustard? Dave's coughing at it. Professor Muston. Yeah, okay. I think of one, that's a Colonel Mustard. Is that what you were doing? I thought you were. I was blaming.

I was like, oh, Professor Musta. You're out of this Colonel. Yeah, a mustard. I thought you were being. Professor Green? No. Professor Green. It is. Professor Plum.

Professor Plum. Yeah. Reverend Green. Oh. It's Reverend Green. Okay. I thought it was, it was way funny if you were scoffing. Yeah.

Oh, we meant to believe. A Colonel, but he's also a professor. Look at the other character. That was a date. That's a third character. He changes his whole face. It's amazing. He became.

Mr. I'm actually. Oh, I love Mr. Rome actually. I still want to punch him in the face. But you love him. He's the kind of guy you love to punch in the face. Love to punch. So you get your little scene and you're like,

okay, here's the log cabin. Yep. Here's the background. And in that great slate article I mentioned, they give an example of one of the scene stories. This one is called Parsonage Parlor. It was in like, passage where the priest lives.

Oh. They live in a parsonage. Parsonage. I thought they lived in a house. Yeah. No, they live in a parsonage. Nip. In a parsonip.

A big white carrot. They live in a parsonip. Yeah, interesting. Okay. Yeah, there you go. Hey, you do whatever you want to do it. You live your one. I'm going to live in a house.

Personally, but I don't want to live in no parsonip. I don't want to live in a parson, but I guess that's why I'm not a priest. I can't remember what I decided not to me. It's probably that. Probably I want to live in a bloody house, not a parsonip. I'm talking about a parson. I just like saying passer nip. It's very fun. It's very fun to say. So this is a little, like you say, it is like a board game in many ways. You get given these clues. Yeah. It's a little bit long. It's about three paragraphs here, but see if you can solve this. We won't interrupt in this time, Matthew? Absolutely feel free to interrupt about the past. No. No. But this is where you get. It says on August 19, 1946. Dorothy Dennison left her house to walk to the local butcher's shop. It was a Monday afternoon and the high school student was on summer break. She arrived at the butcher's shop. Just the one student? One student was on summer break. Everybody else got.

held back. Nice. Dorothy Denison is a husk student who's on summer break. Oh, I see. She is. She is. She is. Okay.

She is. That could be a clue. Yeah. Let's keep that in mind. I'm going to note that. I'm going to make the little mental jot down of that one. Please continue. I can't believe I've made it through two sentences.

I'm being interrupted. That's actually a record. She arrived at the butcher shop around noon and purchased some hamburger steak, which her mother planned to fix for dinner that evening. Not sure what hamburger steak is. Beef. Is it like mince, been in a steak? Anyway, who cares?

Hours passed and Dorothy did not return home. Alarmed, her mother telephoned a neighbour and the butcher, but neither had any leads on where Dorothy could be. At 5.25pm, the mother phoned the police to report her daughter missing. Days passed, but no clues emerged. Finally, on Friday, Officer Patrick Sullivan found her in the darkened home of a church rector who was on vacation. Behind shuttered windows and amid covered furniture, Dorothy lay on her back dead. Her arms and legs were spread and a knife stuck out of her gut.

Her white dress had been pulled open, exposing her chest and bite marks covered her body and legs. Blood had seeped from wounds on her head, hallowing her brown hair in a dark pool. She was still wearing the red hair bow and matching ballet slippers that she had left the house in on Monday. Is this a just a made-up story by the rich woman? So a lot of them are inspired by real crimes that she's either read about or investigated herself but then she puts her own spin on. She names people and gives people motivation and stuff like that.

Yeah, right. I was just wondering for a second, why are you telling us this stuff? This is really depressing. Yeah, it is, but it's not real. Okay. It's not real. But you would get that,

I'm trying to decide, so that's one of 20 little scenarios. Yeah, we're trying to solve a case. You're trying to solve a case. Yeah. There was 20 options and you picked the murdered schoolgirls. I would say this is the only one I found the actual because they don't publish a lot of these online

because as we'll find they're still used as teaching tools. Wow. Still. Still. So that was the only one I found and that's in the Slate article. So it is a little bit violent. But I imagine all of them are. All the murders.

Yeah, but they're not, that's the thing. They're not all murders. Some might look like a murder, but it might actually be an accident. Oh, that's right. Or the other way around. Okay. So that's the thing. I'm thinking this one's probably a murder.

Yeah, the knife in the gun. You haven't even heard all the details. That's true. I don't have a jump-up. So that is all the details. So that's what you get. And then you obviously also look at all the crime scene. So supposedly there's enough info on this for you to be able to solve it.

Yeah. If you're looking at the crime scene as well. All right. Is it a butcher's knife? Oh, shit. Good question. I don't know. But maybe you would look at it and that would be an absolute clue.

You'd go, hang on a second. This is a meat cleaver. And if I just get out my magnifying glass, it has the name of the butcher on the handle. Stuff like that, I imagine. Wow. In 1945, so she's building these over many years. Wait, who did it? Who did it?

I'll tell you that. Not probably won't. I explained a bit more about the nutshells, but while she's building there, she's also investing heavily in these teaching seminars that she's wanted up and then started giving herself. In 1945, Francis began giving by annual week-long seminars at Havit, using her nutshells as training tools.

So as she's building. them. She'd start using them in the classroom. She was almost always the only woman in the room and at first people were skeptical, but over the months and years, she gained their respect and admiration and soon came to be beloved and acknowledged as the expert that she was. And that restarted every semester. Yeah. New group come in and go, who's this? Who's this? Broad. Come on. They also sent her loads of Mother's Day cards every year. Because they're all their kids. She'd forgotten about it.

but they didn't forget her. That feels weird, doesn't it? No word on actual children. None of the male professors are getting father's day cards. Yeah, there's no... So I understand it's sweet. Obviously, it's like they think fondly of her, but you don't have to see every older woman as a mum.

It is funny. Yeah, it's just funny that they don't have any other context for it. Yeah. As a woman we... I like her and I respect her. The only sort of older woman we know is mom. Yeah. So I guess she's like my new mom?

She must be mum? Is she mum? Mummy? They ask questions, mum. I think what's happened here is one of the students has accidentally called her mom one day. Very embarrassing and then really like dug in, committed to the bit.

Committed in. Send her a Mother's Day card to be like, I don't know. I called her mom as a joke. Yeah. It was just a joke. It's all funny. Ha ha ha.

Ha ha. And all the other kids are like, yeah, I guess she's our mom too. I think that then they started making Mother's Day cards from the other students. trying to make it look like an injure. Remember how you sent one too? And the other kid's like, what?

No? What the hell are you doing, man? I've got proof. They go all in on it. Look, I've made a little dollhouse that just shows you writing that card. Okay. It's weird when you do it. She comes in and goes, okay.

Hers are pretty good. Yours is made of toilet roll. And it's quite creepy. Yeah, really maniacal scribbling. She was also made a little. an honorary captain with the New Hampshire State Police, making her the first... New Hampshire. New Hampshire.

Sorry, New Hampshire. Is that another character? That's very posh. New Hampshire. This made her the first woman to join the International Association of Chiefs of Police. Wow. The seminars that she was giving became nationally recognized as the best training one could receive. Shit, that's cool.

So it became a prestigious and well-sought-after course to do. And her work made a practical difference achieving her goal of making forensic and crime investigations recognised and thought of as a precise science. That's awesome. She also wanted to shift perception, especially on women who she felt the police at the time might have prejudices against. Huh. What?

I wonder what made to think that. Look how far we've come. So many of the nutshells to pick women and also marginalised people like sex workers. She wanted the cops to leave their prejudice out of it and look at the clues and facts because it might not be exactly what they first think. Yeah, wow. Holy shit. This feels ahead of its time.

Yeah. And she set up most, a lot of them to be not open and shut cases rather than traditionally, these cops walking there and go, oh, it looks like, you know, blah, blah, that's over there. Yep, someone's clearly shot him. Must have been, must have been the husband. And then. Coming in his Jap from Poirot. Exactly.

It's an open and shut case, Poir-O. But then if you look at the clues. Clearly, clearly the dad did it, Poir-O. He's transforming his whole face. You're surrounded by character actors. I love it. Lucky me. And you're the drama captain.

No, you're the most dramatic one here. Drama queen. I'm the driver queen, yes. I'll tell you about another one of the nutshells. Burned Cabin. It's a favourite of Catherine Ransland, who was a professor of forensic science, psychology at DeSales University in Pennsylvania. She describes it as, there's a dead guy in the room. The story is that a nephew says he was awakened by the fire and had to flee.

But then when speaking to New Hampshire Public Radio in 2015, Professor Amsland said, a man died in it and his nephew was standing outside telling police that he barely just got out in time and wasn't able to save his uncle. But there he is. Fully dressed. Oh, really? He had time to dress, but not get your uncle out?

Stuff like that. Little scenarios like that where you question a little bit further. Hang on. And he goes, I was already awake, fully dressed. I hadn't gone to bed yet. I didn't go to bed yet. I sleep in a tuxedo. I fell asleep in the tuxedo.

I wasn't in my pidgeies yet. Pidgeies. See, how cute is Pidgeies? I know. Did you coin that? I didn't coin it, no. After fastball of Glenn McGraw? Yes.

Wearing his one-day outfit, which used to be called coloured pyjamas. Does that wear a camera? Pidgey. Yep. My pidgey's. No further questions? Pidgeies. Number 11.

Who are Glenn McGrath? Pidgeies. No, an elderly family member called him Pidgeies. And I was like, that's cute as shit. Bob, am I right in saying that you, did drama at school. Yes. So it means a lot that you've spotted Dave and I as talents. Oh, yeah, yeah. You started at cursory level. Am I right in saying that? Yes, that is true. David, that's higher than you ever got? No, he has a degree in it.

Okay. Yeah. Well, that, that's why he's so good. I'm self-taught. You're a natural. I didn't do drama beyond when I didn't have to anymore. Wow. Did your guess was year 10 or 8 or not? Probably like year 9. Great, yeah. And what century was that? It, well, did they call it E. 9 then? I thought, Willie, as I called him, Willie Shakespeare was a contemporary of mine. Yes.

And I taught him a bit about things as well. I like to think we taught each other. Sure. But, yeah, so it was around whenever that was. Who could keep track of these six, yeah, yeah. Willie Wobble Stick. That's what we called him around the school yard. Fuck, that is good.

That's not mine. That's not mine. I'm saying that's what we used to call him. That is very good, though. Willie Wobble Stick. Because his name's Shakespeare. Gosh, that's fun. Oh, I never got it.

Well, sadly, all good things must come to an end. And Francis Glezzan Lee died in 1962 at the age of 83. Harvard shut down her seminars and program and her nutshells might have been lost forever, if not for Harvard Professor. Harvard Professor. Russell Fisher, who rescued them and brought them with him to Maryland when he became Chief Medical Examiner in 1968. He stole them from Harvard.

Yeah, Rusty Fisher. He was like, you don't want to, you don't want these? You're not going to use these? I'm just going to know. I'll take them. I'll take them, no worries. He started teaching with them in seminars and they are still being used today. Wow.

He was caught in class one day, making a couple of them kiss. Yeah. And the students walked, he said, oh, no, no, the teaching aid. These are teaching aid. Going to teach the class with these. Yeah. I don't know. I'm saying it like this.

It's just letting you know. They're in love. They're in love. That's the backstory. These days, they are permanently installed on the fourth floor of the office of the chief medical examiner behind a door marked pathology exhibit. Now, the reason I couldn't tell you the solution to the crime before is each of the nutshell's has a solution secretly kept in an envelope that is only revealed after the course to whoever is. studying the scene and it gives, and after they give their theory. So basically, Jess comes in, I give her all the clues, you get a bit of time to look at the

thing, and then you say your theory, and then I hand you the envelope and you open up and it reveals whether you were on the money or not. Yep. It says, Ace of Spades. Is this the card? It is. Jeez, she was good. Wow.

So doing magic beyond the grave. But because the scenes are still used as teaching devices, they've never been publicly revealed the actual answers, and they're still. carefully guarded secrets, which I think is so cool. Yeah, me too. I'm surprised they've lasted that long. Yeah. Because you'd think that just through, yeah, word of mouth, people would reveal the answers.

I think it shows that the students respect it. Yeah, and take it seriously and want to use them to learn. Yeah, they actually are. Yeah. Which is incredible. So cool. Amazing that it hasn't dated more than you'd think of, they would have, they'd be like, I don't understand, where's the Wi-Fi?

Where's their router? I can't. I don't understand. ship on the router? I don't see the router. I mean, do they watch too much Netflix and they just died? Is that what happened? Yeah. Too much? No? But yeah, it's interesting. I suppose the idea of them being to leave your prejudice at the door is a bit of a timeless kind of lesson.

Well, I don't know. I think cops have they've got there. I think they got there probably around the 90s. And we've got some nutshells to thank for that, I think. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you, nutshells. That's really great. Cops no longer see gender or sex or color creed. It's so good. Yeah.

That's cool. I think that's universal too. Yeah, everywhere. Certainly here in Melbourne. Now, I said she created 20 of the nutshells. Maryland has 18 of them, but what happened to the others? Well, sadly, one was destroyed and is lost to history. The other was just lost until in 2005.

Wow. According to New Hampshire Public Radio, Claire Brown was going through a storage area in one of Glesnelie's old gigantic houses in New Hampshire, as well as their main property that's now a museum. They owned a string of properties throughout, of course, I did. A woman doesn't, a lady doesn't sweat, she Glezner's. Nah, it doesn't work as well. It took you an hour. It's true. It did.

But now you've said it. It was very good. Well, it didn't take me an hour, Jess. You might not know this because, you know, you're still in up a hour. come on, but when you get to my level of comedy, I've been doing it a year and a half longer than a year. Maybe. What you understand is it's about timing.

And if there's one thing Matt Stewart has. Sex appeal? It's timing. I appreciate what you said too, Dave. So Claire Brown, she's going through some boxes. Sorry, Claire. Most boring name. I know.

Claire. Is she a C-L-A-R-E or an I-R-E? Dan's eye. I actually really liked, I think Claire Brown's a great name. Nah, you're wrong though. No, I think that's fantastic. I say that as a Jess Perkins. Like, it's a vanilla name.

I don't mind Jess Perkins either. I think Claire Brown's great. Okay. Okay. Agree to disagree. Well, she's going through a storage area in one of the old mansions in New Hampshire. Brown recalls, there's something in a far corner

where the roof slants down so much you can't stand upright. I said, hmm, I wonder what that is. So she pulled out what looked like a doll's house. But when she looked inside, there wasn't a happy domestic scene. There was a tiny dead man on a tiny little couch. It was the missing nutshell. Did she know about them? To find that, it'd be like...

So scary. Whoa. Yeah. In the corner of a dark addict. I don't think she did. She took it to someone else who was like maybe the manager of the property who instantly recognized what it was. Wow.

She's like, well, I found this creepy little thing. Yeah. And he's like, oh my God, that's one of the nutshells. That'd be real fucking weird. sadly, France's solution to this has been lost. So it's the most mysterious and debated of all the nutshell scenes. Because you come in, you examine it and you go, I think this happened, but there's no piece of paper telling you. No, this is what I wanted to be the answer.

Yeah. Oh, that's kind of fun. So that's cool. Yeah. Is that one in public to be seen so everyone can debate it online? Yeah, that one is, I believe it's kept, it's not with the others. it's kept in like a local museum, maybe in New Hampshire,

around that area where it was discovered. So you can go and have a look at it. Can we put these things on the itinerary? The itinerary. For the tour. We'll have to go to Maryland. Can we add them to the Golden Miles? Yeah.

That's kind of down that way. Yeah. I think it's up there. So her legacy has been immense, and like I said, her nutshells are still used as teaching devices today, the oldest of which is 75 years old, which is pretty incredible.

Wow. It goes to show that you're never too old to make a difference. because she really only started what would become a lifelong legacy in her mid-50s before that society fully repressed her. Isn't that? Yeah. And she wanted to make a difference in some way. I mean, she's like, I want to be a doctor or a nurse and that she wasn't allowed to do either of those things.

And then in her way, she, you know, she found her way anyway. Yeah, it feels like as much as she did for crime scene investigation and stuff, It feels like just equality in law enforcement seems like she did quite a lot. Absolutely, yes. Frequently, like a lot of articles refer to how she was the only woman in the room, like nearly all of her career, which like I said, started in their 50s, which is amazing. But, you know, because of her dedication, she really won over a lot of people and she was suspected in a lifetime and in death, which is great.

And you'll see, like, if you watch one of the CSI franchise, women do star in these shows now. You're right. Shit, and that happened because of her. I think so. Wow. So this was all in Maryland, was it? Is that what you said? We got to go to Maryland?

No, it's in Harvard, but now it's been, all the Natchezals have been moved to Maryland. Maryland, okay. With one of the Harvard professors when he moved. I follow one of the, I follow a Maryland social media thing because I think at some point in an episode ages ago, I started going for their college basketball team or something. Sure. Of course you know. Go Torpens or whatever they're called.

Any Torpens? No. Wouldn't be Torpens. I don't know. Just who is the Maryland team? I don't know. I think it's the Maryland

Bernie Torpens. I personally prefer the Utah Elton Johns. Ah, that's nice. That's right. Put them together there. Yeah. What a combo. Beautiful.

Terrapin. That's not far off. Bernie Terrapin? What does Terrapin mean? Is it a bird? I don't know if it is a bird, but a guy called bird came up with it. Oh, that's what I was thinking.

I definitely had bird. on the brain. Bernie Terrapin. They're turtles. Oh. That's great. I love a turtle. Yeah, that's an awesome mascot.

Back on board. Wow. Go Terrapins. They're terrapins. I'm going to say they're now my college team of whatever sport they play. I think they play a few of them. Anyway. Anyway, to wrap this all up, in 2017, all of the 19 surviving nutshells were reunited for the first time

in decades for an art exhibition called Murder is Her Hobby, Francis Glesnerly and the Nutshell Studies of Unexplained Death. And this was at the prestigious Renwick Gallery, a branch of the Smithsonian American Art Museum in Washington, D.C. It's right next to the White House. Very cool. Cool. Francis Glezzanlees' legacy lives on, and something that made me smile is, you know, when her family, they didn't approve of her wanting a vocation of any description. Yeah. And it was only after they died that she was able to do what she wanted. Well, I find it interesting to note that the website for her family home that I'm so obsessed with, it writes, daughter Francis Glezzan Lee is perhaps the most famous of the Gleznor family.

She was a pioneer in the field of legal medicine and is widely regarded as the mother of forensic science. So she outshone them all. Love that. Which is awesome. And also mother of forensic science, I suppose she's getting the Mother's Day cards. That makes sense. It makes sense.

It actually makes sense. Yeah, no, I got defensive there straight away, didn't I? I didn't think about it. It's actually a nice tribute. I try and do what I call positive feminism. I think sometimes you're a bit negative with it. And I think it's something that you could reflect on. Yeah.

Thank you. Thank you for that. Hey, no worries. That's what I'm here for. I'm leaning in and I'm letting you know how you can improve as a feminist. I think that's my role. No. Just one more thank you, please.

Thank you. Now, I mentioned CSI at the start. Well, Francis got the ultimate tribute. The nutshell studies of unexplained death provided the inspiration for the miniature Chikila, who was a recurring character in season seven of CSI. Wow. And this is possibly even a great attribute. The Smithsonian ponderes that she may have been the inspiration for Angela Lansbury's character in murder she wrote.

Jessica Fletcher. Whoa. That's cool. That's cool. That is cool. This whole thing was cool. You didn't have to convince us of anything. But we agree.

You finally did. But finally we agreed. This is cool. Yeah, this is cool. This is cool. Holy shit. That is sick. Jessica Fletcher.

I think they dumbed down her name a bit, to be honest. Should have gone for Perkins? The smartest name of all. Yeah. Why did you laugh when you said that? I'm very smart. I was thinking Glysson Lee or whatever it was. Oh.

Francis Gleasnly. Blueitt Lee. Francis Bluetly. No. Francis Glezner Lee. Sorry, yes. Francis Glezner Lee. Francis, Jessica.

Yeah, I think you can see. Yeah. Fletcher, Glezner Lee. Yeah. Do you hear it? Do you hear it? Do you hear it? If you listen.

If you're listening. If you're listening. If you're listening, if you put your day listening ears. Ladies don't sweat. They listen. Okay. Two ears. Yes.

Stupid. Well, I feel like every week we say a stupider thing. Yeah, I don't know how we keep doing it. We've got, we're up to a run of 431 in a row where we're just a thing. Keep raising that bar so now. I guess the day that we come in here and we're all very intelligent is the day we just shut up, shop. We go, well, we had a good run. We had a good run.

We shake hands and we leave. Never to see each other again. A good day to you and a good day to you. And to you, sir. And off we go. How good is it to be alive? All right. So, I think, Dave, if that is your...

That's all I got for you. I love that story. I knew nothing of it. And what a great story. Yeah. You took us all over the shop there. And who knew we were going to end up with Bernie Terrapins? Go turps.

You couldn't have predicted at the start of this. That's where we ended up. Exactly. We go places that no one else dare. Remember like 15 minutes in? I went Hepspers, you know? You couldn't have predicted we'd go on those journeys together. It's exciting.

You know, it's all about the memories. Yeah. And the people who make these memories possible are our fantastic supporters. Yes. And if you want to be one of these supporters, you go to Patreon.com slash do go on pod. It's a bunch of different levels, all sorts of different sort of money. amounts and different things you can get. I think Dave will explain this even better than I just did.

Hey, if you support us, you can get a range of things. You can vote on topics. You can get pre-sell. Yep. No, I'm just like, you had one thing and then you kind of went, um, yeah. You get access to tickets before everyone else we tell you about shows that we're doing, tell you where we're going. You get to be in the private VIP Facebook group, which is honestly,

you're like Facebook group. Who cares? This is the only reason a lot of people are. in our group are still on Facebook. They say that a lot. The other reason I'm probably on there too. It's a very nice place. I really think the Zook should get involved and start, you know, paying us all to be there.

Yeah. Would that work with his business model if he just pays everyone? Like, he should be funding our Patreon. You know what I mean? I agree. And we are happy to negotiate with the Zook. Yeah, if the Zook is listening. And you also get.

Mark Zucini. A lot of people sign up because they want to hear some extra content, some bonus episodes. And now we have over 200 in the back catalogue. that you get access to as soon as you sign up at that level. And also we put out three brand new ones every single month. And hopefully later this year, we're very close to getting our goal. We're going to start releasing a fourth one. So basically one extra every week.

And it will be a season, a brand new series of do go D&D, Dungeons and Dragons, Do Go Dragons, whatever we're going to call it, basically us playing Dungeons and Dragons. We've already got one season up there on Patreon. And we're going to bring it back. And last month, we actually had four bonus episodes because we had a two-parter about called a new series called Matt remembers. Oh, you know, it doesn't have to be a series. People loved it.

They really enjoyed it. It's only just bigger. Yeah, Matt remembered his trip to the United States, and he recounted what he did. It was basically a travel diary in audio form, and it was fun. It was really fun. It was good for Matt,

because, as we know, he's getting old, and the brain just doesn't work the way it used to. And they got a record for the great, great, great, great, grandchild. I also did a bonus. episode, there was really the full-length episode about another awesome and little-remembered woman from history who was the first to swim the English Channel. Yeah. And her name was Gertrude.

And I think that's just neat. That was actually so much fun. Yeah, it was a good one. So yeah, they're all up there for you to listen to if you want to get involved. But the first thing we like to do at the end of this episode, this half hour, 40 minutes at the end of each week, we dedicate to... thanking our great supporters. And the first thing we like to do is a section of the show called the fact quote

or questions section. It has a jingle, I actually think. There's something like, where does it go? Fact quote or question. That's it. Ah, yes, it's right. He always remembers the dingh. But luckily, she always remembers the jingle as well as the sing.

There's no jingle if there's no sing. Cool. And if you want to be involved in this section of the show, go to the patreon.com slash to do you go on pod and sign up on the Sydney-Shineberg level. or above, and you get to give us a fact quote or a question or a brag or a suggestion, or really whatever you like. I don't read them out until I read them out on the show, and that's really just forewarning that I might stuff these up, or they might be really awful things, and I can't help it.

I'm reading the words, you know, like a guy on a train track, putting a track down one by one. I don't know where we're ending up. Yeah. First up this week, I read four out. The first one comes from Amy Clark, and everyone also gets to give themselves a title, and Amy's title is Brigadier General. Brigadier General. Brigadie.

A brigadier. A brigadier. I'm bringing a new general forgettable name. Amy Clark does have a forgettable name. I wouldn't forget that because it's so boring. I also think I think Amy Clark's a really, I like Amy Clark as an answer. Almost anything goes with Clark. Clark's great.

Amy's a great name. Yeah, I like Amy. I think it's a great combo. I take it back. Amy Clark's great. Thinking it goes well with Clark. Clark. Clark, Clark.

If you're a chicken. A cock cock, clock. A choking chicken. Choke the chicken. Okay. Ante euphemism, probably. I would put you on timeout, but this is sort of your part of them. It's hard to shut him out.

And he knows that, and he's taking it for a walk. I know, and it's an absolute piss taking it. Yeah, you are taking that piss over there. We will be having a chat with you after the pod, mate. I already to AJ over in the beautiful cross church city of New Zealand. Can you just, I'll have a time out, but you just edit it out so the listeners don't have to sit through it. Great. All right, well, that was longer than I was expecting.

Jess, you made me wait a full three hours, but I've learnt my lesson. You made him stand in the corner and stare at the wall. I'm late for my dinner plans, but it was worth it. I hope AJ cut that out. Otherwise, we might be heading towards our longest ever episode. Anyway, Amy Clark is offering a quote this week writing, due to being older than time itself, I no longer remember. Wait, you're a fellow.

You can't be as old as the wind. The earth was so lonely back then. Surely I would have bumped into you. Due to being older than time itself, I no longer remember where I first heard this quote from Dorothy Parker that is stuck in my brain through the ages. Dorothy Parker, I know that name. Me too. I can't remember.

You read, I'll Google. The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity. That's a great quote. American poet and writer. Ah, yes. Dave would know that. Did you know that, Dave?

Yeah, sure. And Amy finishes by saying, Thanks for being one of the rare podcasts that both fuels and sates my curiosity in equal measure, all while being hilarious and delightful along the way. You three are beyond compare. Oh my God, Amy. Oh, my goodness. Amy. I'm blushing.

Amy? I needed that. Amy. Amy, you don't know. You don't know. I needed that. After the three hours in the corner, I was at a low end. Yep.

And for you to include me in the... In the three, you like that? Yeah. That felt really good. I needed that. So often people say, Jess and Dave are so good. And then they notice I'm standing in the room.

They say, oh, and you. And Matt. And Matt. And Matt. Very good. Thank you so much, Amy. Very, very nice. Next one comes from Paul Meller.

Oh, what a man. And Paul. What a man, what a Meller. What a man, what a Meller. You're warming up for the Triptitch section there. Yeah, yeah, that's right. Paul's title is that guy on the customer helpline growing patiently impatient. Oh.

Paul also listeners might remember him. He took us for a walk on the epic St Kilda episode. That's right. We went for a lovely little wander. At one point, his dog went missing, but it came back soon after. It was a roller coaster. It was a roller coaster. That's exciting.

Paul's asking a question right. Oh, I've just missed it. You went there for that. No, and Jess is listening back then all five hours. Yeah, I'm not an idiot. Of course I have. I couldn't miss out on five hours of Pure Entertainment. It was a good app.

People have stopped me in the street. Is that true? People have stopped me in the street, yeah. Not about this. Sell your stuff. They're like, hey, love the beard. Hey, and have you heard about these great rates on telephones? Paul writes, hi guys, hope you're well.

I've been on hold on a customer helpline for 20 minutes now. Oh dear. This is with a large UK electrical goods supplier. They sent me the wrong item. So I arranged a return, slash replacement and they've only gone and done the same again. Can't get good help these days, right, Paul? I'm now trying to just return it and get a refund.

After trying the automated chat service that didn't work, I'm now just trying to speak to a person. I'm getting really frustrated with this. So my question is, what frustrates the hell out of you? I may still be on hold by the time this episode goes out. Keep up the great work and keep the faith. Paul, I'm guessing that's related to the saints. Keep the faith.

He's the Saints man. It's just good advice. Or maybe he's, yeah, he's suggesting we all think about that carpenter that I once knew. Greg. I wonder if the electronic retail he went to is Argos. Oh. Is that the one? I'm pretty sure.

Yeah, that was the one we went into and a fellow were in the future. It was a shop without products. All it has in the middle of the room is like a computer terminal. And then you go up to and you click what you want. Because we needed to buy a card reader so we could sell some merch on. the tour that worked in the UK. And I walked in there, I'm like, oh, where's the stuff? They're like, oh, no, it's all in there.

And then you go and you, like, look it up like, like you would. Online. On their own computer. Yeah. And then you click it. And then you take your receipt up to the counter and they go, okay. And they go out of the back and get it from like a warehouse, I assume. We captured some of this on, on camera, which.

Can believe it. Connor put into a, a travel log video, which Dave and I have not reviewed. I reckon he edited that months ago. We should really have a little peek. Anyway, it was very interesting. Yeah, wow. Oh, anyway, there's a question here. What really frustrates you?

Jess, I feel like you're someone who can get frustrated. No. I'm very patient and not at all emotional. It's funny, though, because I do get very frustrated all the time, very easily, but now I can't think of anything. I'm thinking one that's just fresh in the mind because we talked about it last month's bonus episode about Gertie, Gertrude, Gertrude, Etterley, people who universalised their individual experience, they go, this is how it was for me.

So this is how it is for everybody. You know, I remember it from back in high school coming up to exams, people would be like, I was a crammer, right? So I'd be cramming study in the night before and the day of. And I remember people going, hey, if you haven't learned it by now, you won't learn it. Yeah. You can't get it.

I'm like, well, this is actually me learning it. Okay, so shut the fuck up and let me, can you just let me do it? And I think, well, it didn't help me. So just letting, you know, I'm like, well, I don't care. I'm not you. Yeah, that is annoying. Well, so, you know, that's, I don't know, that's a good example, but that sort of stuff. I hate, uh, fiddly little things and I'm really bad at like, very easy, practical

things for most people. I was talking to you about this recently, opening, like, uh, packets of things, like a cereal box or something. Oh, yep. I'm very bad at getting my finger under there and opening it without just ripping the whole box open. And I find that so frustrating. And things like getting Gladwrap or foil out of the, you know, you pull it out and

then you're supposed to use that thing that chops it off. Glad wrap is impossible. Glad Rap is impossible. I get so frustrated. For a long time. I get annoyingly, like over the top frustrated with Glad Rap. Did you just correct that because of your Triple J training? Can't say.

CloudRap's a brand. Oh, no. It's that, well, Gladd is a brand. So I thought people outside of Australia wouldn't know what it is. I'm talking about cling wrap. I'm talking about those little fucking plastic rolls of shit. That get me fired up. Yeah, I do forget I can mention brains.

It's the big issues here. It's not an inequality, you know, things that. Poverty's really annoying. Someone gave me a tip at an exam when it, what, decades ago. Shut! I hate when people just suddenly stop in the middle of a footpath, like right in the middle and you're like, all right, I'll go around. you.

Yeah, yeah. I make a real song and answer that. When people don't wave after you let them in. Oh, yeah, you're an absolute dog. You piece of shit. You piece of shit. It's the same driving when the car's like clearly just looking for a spot and they're just stopping and sawing in the middle or you're like, pull over and figure it out.

Yeah. You're not aware. I'm meant to be somewhere else now. Oh, something that really annoys me is I've got like a little mount for my phone. Yeah. It's like a magnetic thing that I put, you know, when I'm listening to something. I also got the maps open or whatever. Yep.

But the lead that charges the phone goes up over the dashboard, and it goes right over the play and pause button. Fantastic. So often the cable just bumps it and it will pause the podcast. And I'll go, oh, play again, and it will happen about five times in a minute. And that really frustrates me. That's grinds my gears. These are kind of pettigroups you want, Paul, because we got him. Because he didn't.

He was talking about being on hold. That's right. I think it's, I think the tone he's going for is, there's little things. that really get you know. My all-time one, and you two are well aware of this. You're settling in, you know where I'm going. Please. You're settling on the plane.

Yep. You've selected a movie. They've gone through all the safety stuff. Everyone's... We're well and truly in the air. We're in the air. And then the pilot just likes to chirp in. And for some reason, it's not optional.

If the pilot wants to say, oh, we're cruising at, uh, some of those feet. Yep. And the destination weather is... And you're like, we're not going to be there for 10 hours. I don't care what the weather's like. I can't change now. The clothes I've got are the clothes I've got. Yeah, there's a northwesterly blowing in Heathrow now.

I don't care. I guess tell me writers for a battle, but I still don't care because again, like this is what I wore. So I don't give a shit. And I don't mind them saying it. Yeah. But just make it optional that the movie is paused.

Yeah. It should be, There should be two streams, all right? The pilots, hey, I need to tell you something important for your safety right now. That pauses the movie. Of course. The other one is, you know, maybe there's a... I've got some inane bullshit to tell you.

Just want to have a waffle. Yeah. I'm doing that, because I think they only do it to just to make you all feel at ease like they're in control, right? That's the point of it. But I only felt that. Definitely know what I'm doing up here. You were just trying to watch cars. Yeah.

Cars too. The Incredibles, too. Incredibles, too. Never got through it. Can I share one more that frustrates me? Of course. Okay, so a little while ago, the building managers of my apartment building decided to build a new fence out the front and they built gates because they were annoyed that every now and then somebody would walk down a little pathway on the side of our building to cut the corner. They were annoyed that people did that.

So they put in a new fence and gates, which now means every single delivery cannot be. delivered because they can't open the gate because there's no clear handle on the outside. You have to like reach through a gate to pull a latch to open the gate. So nobody... They've taken the smallest problem and they've turned into a bigger one. And they're all old. So I'm like, are you not getting deliveries? Every time I order food, I have to go down to them because they're like, I'm stuck.

I can't get in. So what was the big deal about people cutting the corner? I've no idea. They were just annoyed that people were sort of like... Oh, the body corporate was. Yeah. Oh, that's funny. So they've made themselves a...

a bigger problem. Yeah. It is funny how people do get very, um, this is my patch. Yeah. Hey, what are you doing? Are you, like, oh, you're here to, um, give me a present. Sorry. There's like 38, there's 38 apartments. You know every single person who might come and go from that apartment. Like maybe one. And their friends and family. Maybe one or two people did it every now and then. And I understand that's annoying. But now there's a loud gate that bangs every time somebody does come home and it's right out the front of somebody's bedroom. It's funny. And it's funny. And it annoys a shit out of me and I order Uber and they're always like, I can't get in. I'm like, you can't. And they're like, I can't. And I'm like, fuck it and I've got to go down the stairs.

Thank you, body corporates in general. Body corporates in general, I think they don't tend to be too good. No. Thank you for letting me get that off my chest. And thank you so much for that opportunity, Paul, that he afforded you there. Feels good. Next one comes from Ben Johnson, aka Schmoison taste tester. Brackets not yet poisoned. Do you remember schmoizen? I can't quite remember what it was, but it's an old reference to something. Shmoizen.

Oh my God. Does that ring any bells? Ben, I'm sorry. Shmoison. Shmoisen. I do remember schmoison, but I can't quite place it. If Dave doesn't remember where... You wear stuffed yet.

We're fooked. Shmoisten poison. Anyway, Ben is asking a question writing, Hey, guys, are you taking any time off Christmas slash New Year's season and what are you up to? Well, this is where now. now in late January, but what did we do? We did take some time off. We did take some time off.

But not, the podcast still kept coming out. Well, that's because, yeah, we are recording this before. Yeah. We're getting ahead of time, so. This is probably coming out while we're still on holidays, if that makes you feel better, Ben. But the episodes will come out because we never miss an episode. So now we're trapped in that cycle.

Well, I think that's, I'm almost proud of it. I am proud of that. Almost. Almost, but sometimes. But yeah, we've taken some time off. Yeah. When's this one coming out? I think it's like 24th or something, 20.

Oh, yeah. I think mine would have been a pretty low-key Christmas. I was in Melbourne this year with my side of the family catching up and then just chilling out. There was a couple of weeks off any work. So that was, I assume, lovely. Yeah. I hope it was. I hope it will be.

Yeah. Yeah, I'm just hanging in Melbourne around at my folks place for Christmas, which they rotate with mum's brother and sister each year. They're a three-way rotation. Good to have three. That's good. You get a couple years off. That's good.

Brother than one than the other. Yeah. Yeah. So I'm really looking forward to that. And then, yeah, probably head to the country for a bit of time over new years. I'll have headed to the beach. And by the time this comes out, I'll be back from a little week in Tazzy as well. Oh, that's so good.

Very nice. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know why I said the country. I'm going to bright. Country. It's country. It's a very beautiful touristy town

But it will be super overcrowded But it'll be a lot of fun There's a reason everyone's there Because it's nice It's great town I mean Our family has been You know

We go back there Yeah about 150 years So you know All of a sudden These city slickers Are coming up there for their holidays Like alright here we go This is my slice of paradise

I'll put up a gate Because people are cutting through It's so annoying But my folks have, I don't know, I'm talking about it on the podcast before, they've got like a caravan site there and they're knocking them all down. So the bright dream for us might, we won't get up there as much as we used to. It's getting too expensive because it's getting so popular. Yeah.

It's only for the fucking, you know, the 1% is like you two. Probably be a girl. You probably still hadn't up there. Yeah, I'll still be going to bright. I bought Bright. Oh, you bought it. Yeah, I bought Bright. I said, how much?

Yeah, right. I got that in the car. I'll keep the change. But I can't wait. I love getting up there. And yeah, watching a bit of cricket. Oh, yeah. Pakistan's coming out, West Indies.

I don't know if they'll be great challenges to Australia today. What do you reckon? I mean, you never want to say that. Do you want my opinion too? Yeah. I reckon everyone's going to have fun. I hope so. I only ask Dave because he's a cricket man.

And then we're into the Ozzy Open. We've got the tennis happening. Yes. Yeah, it's a beautiful time in. Australia in Melbourne. Summer's here, baby. Can't wait. Actually, I would have already been to Perth for the fringe world over there.

Oh, wow. That's really early this year. Yeah, it's in Jan and then I'll be going to Adelaide soon. Shit, that's exciting. I'm saying a bit of this wide brown land. Lovely stuff. Anyway, I always ask people who ask a question to answer their question and Ben has done so writing.

In my new job, it's a lot more difficult to listen to podcast while working. So I've started to fall behind and have a bit of a backlog. Thankfully, I've got some time. Yeah, he's still back where Shmoisen was a reference. Yeah, that's right. He's not going to hear this until Easter. Thankfully, I've got some time off in December that I'm going to use to relax, build some big Lego sets that I've raised, which I mean, similar to painting small figurines,

I think it's really cool. And, um, I don't know, whatever. I felt so stupid after, like, sounding like I was judging that guy. I didn't, he was a, I still think of him a cool guy. It's just unexpected from that person. Yeah. No, I understand that. You are sort of like, oh, yeah, okay, well, if that's what you like to do, go for it.

Yeah. It's, you didn't expect that person to be doing it. Yeah, for sure. So, yeah, Lego sets. Hell yeah. That I've recently wasted money on and catch up on those podcasts. I'm currently building the Lego Sanctum Sanctorium. Oh.

Sanctum sanctorum from Dr. Strange. Oh, cool. As opposed to the Oxford Dictionary guy. What was his? the scriptorium. The scriptorium. Saying that, and he's also listening to Matt remembers the bonus episode about the trip to America. Then I've got three episodes of two on the think tanks and weekly planning a whole bunch of others to enjoy.

You've got your work cut out for you on holidays. It's called it's a holiday. This sounds like body nine to five. Yeah. I think you better be getting up bright and early, my friend. By the time you're reading this, I've probably finished those Lego sets and got a new backlog of podcasts to catch up on. Keep up the good work, love you guys, and happy 2024. Thank you, Ben.

Thank you, Ben. Happy 2024. Hopefully your wedded bliss continues. He got married right or engaged. Remember? He showed us his ring when we're in England? I mean, he's engagement ring, not his, not his butthole. Can they stay in?

I don't know. Asked any further question, Ben. I feel like I don't know why, but I'm losing my mind. All right. Is this the last one this week? From Katie Watson. Now Katie Kalu must change my patron name after getting married. Katie Kalu.

Katie Kalu. That. Kallu. That name rules. From Katie Watson again, I'd say a rock's odd great name, but Katie Kalu, that's all of a sudden you're opening doors for Katie Kalu. Yeah. Katie Kalu, how do you do? And Katie's given themselves a time.

title of Certified Do Go on File Storage Organizer. Oh, thank God. Asking a question, hey, Aussie mates, I wanted to ask you if you ever have had a spooky or paranormal experience and has answered this? Do you want me to read her answer first? Yeah. Now, Mrs. Kalu does not usually mess with ghosts. Oh, I love a bit of third person early.

Yeah, I love that. Well, there hasn't been a Mrs. Kalu in these parts for 70 years. In fact, I'm absolutely terrified of anything paranormal, but lately I've discovered a YouTube channel called the Overnight Channel in which a group of guys stay overnight in haunted locations. No. Last night, I was woken up at 3am by a little noise. It sounded like a whisper, but I couldn't work out what it was saying.

When I looked up at the wall, there was also a little red square flashing. Kind of reminded me of those little cat laser pens you can get. I have no idea what it could have been. Anyway, I'm now concerned I've let some sort of demon in after watching the show, and I will now be retiring from watching anything spooky ever again. That's a good call. Oh, that's fun. I love, I kind of, I don't really believe in it, but I want to. And I love the idea of there being more, you know?

Yeah. It's like, I see a ghost. I'm like, holy shit. There's so much stuff that I don't understand. I will haunt you if I'm giving it. opportunity to. That'd be really great if you could. Yeah, I want you to know that. Both of you. I mean, you do. Me too. Yeah, but I'm going to specifically haunt your bathroom, Dave. What have I done? So you're always like, oh, I need to poo. I really need to go.

I've been to shower and she's in there. Don't look, Jess, no. But I'll be looking. Oh, no, that was creepy. That was too creepy. I keep the curtain closed, thank you. Yeah, I'm a ghost, idiot. I can go anywhere. I have a shower curtain now, but I'll have a toilet curtain then. Yeah. I remember after my granddad died, and I don't know if this was just me. I'm guessing now that it was just my brain trying to comfort me, but I, that the night of his funeral, I felt like he was sitting at the end of my bed.

Oh. I felt like he was sitting there. Yeah, that's nice. And it was really nice and comforting. Yeah. And I, but looking back, I'm, and I fully believe that it was, it happened for a while, but looking back, I'm guessing it was just, you know, my brain, given me. of a bit of comfort, but whatever.

I guess it's that same sort of thing we've said about, like, psychics and that before. Like, if it brings you comfort, then I don't see any harm. And they're not asking you to make a monthly... That's it. The ones that are, like, really exploitive. Exploitive.

It's funny that we are thanking the people that do give monthly donations to that are podcasters, of course, very above board. Not exploitative at all. Not at all. I haven't had any... I don't think any sort of paranormal experiences. My partner, he and his family used to go to a house in Galban in New South Wales that go there a bit. And he is convinced it was haunted and had like several sort of weird experiences there.

And he keeps saying like, we'll go one day. And I'm like, fuck no. Hell no. He's like, no, it'll be fine. I'll be with you. I don't give it shit. Why would I go? Let's go.

Okay, you can go on a romantic getaway with him then. Thank you. Great. Is that too much of us? Thank you. No, I don't have to go. Oh, you were talking about with Aiden? Yeah.

I'd go anywhere with Aiden. His book, he wrote a book about like, what do you call it? Reincarnation and stuff? Yes, yeah. Loved it. Love that sort of stuff. But what was it called again? Secret Life of Pets.

Reincarnation of Tom. Reincarnation of Tom. Thank you very much. You'll never guess the main character's name. Greg. But I was on. I think in November I was on Tom Trans podcast called Spooky Funny. Scary funny.

Scary funny. And they showed, Tom showed me photos that made me think, I'm like, if people are interested and that sort of stuff, he showed me photos that really made me think, holy shit, if this is real, then, wow. Yeah, cool. I was, yeah, it made me feel something. I don't do spooky. I'm too easily scared.

Dave? I've not had any paranormal activities or sort of things from beyond but I did the one of the scariest places I've ever been was about 15 years ago when I was what about 18 or so myself and two other friends it was not my idea no three other friends went to Lirondal which was an infamous abandoned like mental asylum oh that had been abandoned for a long long time and we went there at night like like midnight or something. And it was scary because of like, you know, it was dark.

There's holes in the wall. There's like lots of graffiti going on in there. And it's, it was going on. Yes. In front of your way. No, there is. But that's the thing that you, there's probably other people in there because it's so big. Yeah.

And it was very, very scary. Yeah. And I believe it has since been knocked down and turned into a Coles shopping center. Whoa. The spookest thing at all. But, um, but yes, that was the only time I've ever been in. anywhere that other people, that you would go if you're like a, you know, a paranormal. Yeah, right.

Yeah. And it was terrifying. That's sick. But you love X-Files and stuff like that. Love the X-Files, but I like that because it's not too scary. I don't only like scary movies or horror movies, really at all. But I love, I do love the X-Files. Yeah.

But I love their balance of humor and also, I know, shock, I guess. Yeah. Great. Oh, thank you so much for that question. Katie Kalu, and a collude to you, too. And Ben and Paul and Amy. Appreciate that. Yeah.

Sydney-Shineberg level if you want to get involved in the facts, quotes and questions. The next thing we like to do is shout out and thank a few of our other great supporters. We normally thank three each. Just normally comes up with the game based on the topic of the day. I thought it could be what they are the mother of. Oh, yeah, great. Everyone's mother. Do you have a mother generator?

Oh, look it up. That can't be possible, can it? No. No, this time I'll use my imagination. So if I can kick us off. Yes. I'd love to thank from Panorama in South Australia, Emily Aubrey. Oh, that's a great name.

Emily Aubrey, and both spelled differently to you expect. Yeah. Yeah, well done. Emily Aubrey, the mother of Swiss cheese. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yep. The holiest of mothers. That's something.

That is something. That is something. Thank you so much, Emily. Emily, and I should say if anyone's listening going, I've been signed up and should have had a shout out some time. At the moment, the wait's about four or five months. If you've been on for longer than that, Emily was patiently waiting for about 18 months. Oh, I thought at one stage it was around 18 months. It got out really long, but it's like it's about six months or less now.

Okay, great. So yeah, if you've been a Patreon for six months or more and you don't think you've had your shout out. DM me on Patreon. That's the best place. to do it because I'll double check for you. And yeah, no stress at all if you are worried, anyone who's worried, please just message and say, hey, just. Matt's never going to respond to be like, oh, I'm idiot, shut up, you know, he's very nice.

It'll either be potentially, you've missed it, but potentially like with Emily, I've missed it. And I'd hate to think that I've missed you. And if you've missed it, we can tell you which episode it was. Exactly. Well, one time someone said, don't tell me exactly, because I want to listen back. back, but can you give me a basic idea? Okay, yeah. I'm like, it's like I'm like a, a range.

You're like a 10 episode range. Oh, I think it's sometime in the first 400 episodes. Because they wanted to be surprised still. That's cute. Very cute. Also, may I think from Dublin in Ireland, it's Jay Deanie. Jay Deany, great name. Jay Deany.

Now, Jess's is our Eilophile. Yes, I'm an Eilophile. Erin file. Yes. I don't know what the word is. Yep. And so you can finish this for me. The mother of tin whistle.

Oh, okay. Yeah. That's, uh, can you play a little bit? I can. But not, you need a tin whistle. I don't have a tin whistle on me right now. Would you want, I think it's one of my noises. Yeah, I think it should be.

Okay. I'm hoping for this. Do do do do. Do do do do do do do do do do do. God, he's good. Ship to shore? Yes. I love it.

Very good. What a show. Did you know ship to shore was on the tin whistle? I didn't know that. I didn't know. It wasn't initially. That was the B-side. Yeah, the B-side was on the tin-old.

That is, wow. Brought back a lot of memories, thank you. What is the Irish equivalent of Anglophile is what I'm looking up? What is the Irish equivalent of ship to shore? What's their ship to shore called? Oh, it's a hibernophile. What? Hyberophile.

There you go. Never heard of it. Cool. That's beautiful. Thank you, J. Deanie. And finally for me, if I may, I'd love to thank from San Bernardino, California, yay. San Bernardino. J.D. 984.

Oh, J.D. 984 is, of course, the mother of Simmy. Simmy Simions Simions Mother of Simians Wow Simmy I thought I might have

back myself over the corner there Simions I love to arm Yeah I know when you start saying a word It just comes out as a word Yeah

But for me it often is a sound It is And it's fun It's fun to see where it goes Want to see Fun to hear, fun to watch Yes Simmy

Simmy Simi Yeah JD 984 Mother of Simians May I think some people Oh my God, that would be so great. It wouldn't be all right.

It would be fantastic. Oh, thank goodness. I would love to thank from, oh, location unknown. Oh, okay. It's mysterious. Can only assume deep within the fortress of the moles. I would love to thank Elise Trewick. Did you say Trewick?

Elise. Trewick. Troik. Troik, Truik, I don't know. Truik, trueic, maybe. Trueik. Great name, though. Great name.

If it was in England, they just often get rid of the wick, don't they? What's one of the wicks? And they just say, check. If it was English, it would probably be Elise Tra. They have so many letters and don't pronounce any of them. Neither do we, though, to be fair. Huh? Huh?

At least. Jim, Owen used to do a bit about, I was thinking about that before, how he'd be like, Irish people don't pronounce, we pronounce every little bit of a word, whereas Irish people don't. He's like, you know, you hear, you say flower. They say flower. We say flower. Yeah.

Flour. You say flower. Flour. Flour. Flour. Beautiful country. Beautiful country. That is so lovely.

Is he North Irish? North. Elise is, of course, the mother of whiteboards. Whiteboards. Whiteboards. Yeah. Cop that blackboards. Yeah.

That chalk, annoying. Hard to write with. Yeah, it makes it a horrible set. Hard to wipe off. Whiteboard makeup, beautiful. Oh my gosh. Love that squeak. Glides.

Beaker's in the room. Oh, fuck, that was a permanent marker. God damn it. Fuck, that was permanent chalk. You never heard that. Never heard that. That's why blackboards are superior. Okay.

Yes, you're right. Yes. Yeah. Thank you, Elise. But, Elise, you fucked it. I would also love to thank from Face, Safety Bay in Western Australia. Caitlin Berry. Sounds like they're over-comensating, calling it Safety Bay.

Safety Bay. You know some bad chits gone down there. Oh, yeah, yeah. No, no, no, no, no, everyone's welcome here at Safety Bay. Bring your kids. Hibernia. This is from something 20 minutes ago. Yep.

Hibernia was the word ancient Romans referred to Ireland with. So that's why it's hibernafile. Habonophile. And the antonym, of course, hibernophobe, people who hate the Irish. Oh, well, I challenge you to find me a hibernophobe and I'll punch them in the jaw. You're a big hibernifier. Big time. Yeah.

Maybe too much. Yeah, tone it down. Caitlin Barry. Callan Barry, what a name. Of. Pearl. Mother of Pearl. What does that mean?

That's something, isn't it? Yeah. What is it? It's like it's the mother of pearl. Oh. It's the mother of the mother of pearl. Mother of the Mother of Pearl. Mother of the Pearl.

Right. Mother of Pearl. It's that substance that you have on seashells. Yeah. It's an organic, inorganic, composite material. Obviously, you idiot. How do you not know these things? Also known as NACA.

Oh, I'm knackered. Is that where that comes from? Yes. Mother of NACA. NACR. It's kind of like, you know, it gives it a bit of a shimmery, pearlescent sort of look. Perlessent.

Love that. It's N-A-R-A-C-R-E. Probably N-C-R-A. Mate, I'm absolutely knackered right now. I'm neck-rayed right now. I've got Mother of Pearl all over my face. I wonder if I... Oh no, you're right to look at me like that, Jess.

I didn't know where that was going and then I sat and you were right to look at me much like that. Oh, I didn't mean it like that. Just let me move on. Just let me move on. I wonder if Caitlin Berry would be able to find any Mother of Pearl on safety beach where they're from. I assume so. Safety Bay.

Safety Bay. Sorry, safety beach is somewhere else. That's in Victoria, I believe. Anyway, I would also love to thank, also from Western Australia, this time in Egglinton. I would love to thank Sarah. Sarah. Sarah. Sarah is the mother of...

Don Johnson, the old actor. Yeah. Dakota Johnson's dad. Dakota Johnson's dad, yeah. So, Sarah's also... So Dakota Johnson's grandmother is Sarah. There you go. Yep.

Who's Dakota Johnson? An actor, Don Johnson's daughter. Oh, yep. I should have put two and two together. Yeah. So there you go, Sarah. You're a grandmother. Is that where you wanted?

Congratulations. Thank you for supporting the show. We're losing our minds. Your granddaughter's very successful. Don Johnson is a great name. Don Johnson. Don Johnson. We had friends recently have a baby and named him Don.

Just Don is so good. How good is that? Granddad names are back. Baby Don. Don. Bruce. We've got a friend. It's Bruce recently.

Oh, that rules. Don't we? Bruce? Who? I don't know if, I don't know. Well, someone who's been on the show before. I don't know if they have. I don't know if we're, I don't know.

I can't think of who it is. So that's exciting. Tell me later. Okay. Dave, do you want to thank some people? Hey, I would like to thank from a location unknown, probably also deep within that fortress. It's a big fortress. I'd like to thank Luke Watson.

Luke Watson, mother of jugs. Oh, yeah. Wow, mother jugs. Mother of jugs. What you're talking, beer jugs? Beer jugs, yes. Beer jugs. Yep, give me another jug.

Go get around a jugs? Water jug. Water jug. Whatever kind of jug. Any jug, all jugs. Yes, there's a jug of water over there. You're saying tits? No.

Come on. Come on, mate. Get out of it. I thought kids are the funniest word to say. Are we talking tits? Are we talking tits? We're talking tits? Wait, is it, are we talking tits?

That's like, I zoned out for a second, but I'm back now. Jugs, we're talking tits? We're talking, well, we're talking. My boys, are we talking dits? The judge? Are we talking dits? We've got another episode of a good. I know.

It's because I'm in so much pain. I would like to also thank from Hastings. Hastings on Hudson in New York, Lisa Vance. Oh, Vance. Mother of Holly Valance. Oh, yes. Oh, wow. Kiss, kiss.

And Lisa or Holly didn't want to, you know, just cruise off her mother's name. So that's why she added the Al. Al. She outed the owl into Vance. At first she was going to be Holly Alvance. Yeah. No, I'm Holly. Valance.

Whoa. Holly, you've done it. It's good stuff. I can see you being on Neighbors for multiple seasons. Yeah. I think she married a billionaire, so good on her. Yeah, yeah. She's fine.

She's doing well. And also from the United States of America, this time in Texas, in Converse, I'd like to thank Mario Valdez. Is that where the shoes come from? Probably. Wow, that's cool. I don't know. Mario Valdez. Holy shit, what a name.

Incredible name. Mother, all right. Let's do a three-worder. It's always the best. I'll say mother of Dave, Jess, back to me, right? Mother of Christmas. Octopus. Sounds.

Wow. Actually, I think that's in the top thousand, isn't it? Christmas octopus sounds? Well, yes. How's the Christmas octopus sound again? Well, you know how I feel about Christmas in January. I've kicked the Christmas tree out the front door. Don't give a shit about it anymore.

But all year round, I'm there for octopus Christmas, which to me is a different thing entirely. Well, this is what the octopus Christmas sounds is like. Ding-knon. He's doing the tentacles with his hands It's a lot of mouth Oh, yep That's very good

Yeah, that was very good Yeah, that was very good That was lovely. That was beautiful. Thank you for that. Generally, that felt like I passed out for a bit there. Me too. Yeah.

Thank you so much to Mario. Lisa, Luke, Sarah, Caitlin, Elise, JD, Jay and Emily. And the last thing we need to do, Bob, is welcome in a solo inductee into the Tripitch Club. Now, you explain this so well, I think. Thank you. Well, the way the Triptich Club works is if you support the show for three consecutive years on the shoutout level or above, you are automatically inducted

into the TripDitch Club. Once you're in, you cannot leave. You're in for life. And it's sort of like a cool, exclusive lounge. Like one of those billionaire gentleman club type places. Holly Valance is probably in there right now.

Holly Valance has got one. Absolutely. And Matt's behind the, he's at the door. He's got the velvet rope. He's going to lift it for you to bring you in. He's going to tick your name off. Dave always books a band.

I'm behind the bar. This week, I have made tiny little miniatures of an assortment of cocktails and little tiny snacks, but also little dead bodies. Holy shit. Yeah, right until the end there, that was cutest shit. Actually, little dead bodies could be cute. They're cute dead bodies.

Yeah, anything smaller is cute. That's right. So, like, a huge dead body, not cute. Creepy. A tiny little dead body. That's cute. We're getting a cute territory. Yep.

But little, I mean, if we're talking like the cocktail glasses are. Tiny tiny. Teeny tiny. Teeny tiny little martini glasses. Yeah. Oh, very cute. I'm all in on this. I've got little tiny cocktail shakers. And so I just go like,

chik, tiki, chik, tchik. They sound like they're going to be a nightmare to make. Oh, yeah, big time. And there will be long lines. Three drops. Yeah, long lines at the bar. Yeah.

So I'd stock up while you're there. Okay, yeah. You know, order like 10 at a time. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I reckon. And then you could just use your normal shaker and just pour them out. No, I'll still be doing it. And Dave, you normally book a band?

Yeah, you never going to believe it. Obviously we're talking about nut shells love on this week's episode. Yes. I couldn't believe that they said yes. And obviously the who from all the CSI. Yeah, couldn't believe that D's nuts said yes to being in. Wow. We got the D's nuts.

Yeah, great to have an Australian band in. We got the D's. We got the D's nuts. Wow, well done. That's huge. That's a great booking. Yeah. The Who didn't write back, so.

Really? That's surprising. So then I say, who? Yeah. Exactly. That's who you are now to us. Yep. Who?

You mean nothing to us. You're not the who? You're just who. Yeah. So, there's one name to come in this week. Fantastic. Jump on in. Let me lift this velvet rope.

Come in, have a great time. Grab yourself a tiny drink or 10 or 20. However many you want. And get ready for the entertainment of D's Nuts. Not D's Nut, the band D's Nuts. And Dave's also on the stage. He's about to hype you up. up with a bit of weak word play.

Jess will hop up, Dave. All right, so are we ready? One inductee this week. Here we go. Please make them welcome from Wellsville in Utah and the United States. It's Alison Paul. I don't feel Alison poor. I feel Alison rich.

Yeah. We're all in Wellsville tonight. Yeah. Wealthy's will. Yeah. Let it rain. Take on these nuts. two, three, four.

All right, thank you to everyone that was inducted there, Alison, just recapping. That brings us to the end of the episode. Jess, what do we need to tell me before we go? Just that we love them so much. Yeah. And we're sorry for what we said, we still love you. Yeah, whatever we said. We don't always like you, but we always love you.

I don't mean it. I just want you back for good. That's right. If you would like to suggest a topic, you can. There's a link in our show notes. or go to our website, do go onpod.com. And anybody can suggest a topic. You can find us on social media at Do Go On Pod or Do Go On Podcast on TikTok.

That's right. And remember to wash behind your ears and your butt. Dave, booted home. Do Americans, that's your fanny. You fanny. Hey, we'll be back next week with another episode. And until then, I'll say thank you so much from listening. And goodbye.

Later. Later. Don't forget to sign up to our tour mailing the Sue. know where in the world you are and we can come and tell you when we're coming there. Wherever we go, we always hear six months later, oh, you should come to Manchester. We were just in Manchester. But this way you'll never, will never miss out. And don't forget to sign up, go to our Instagram, click our link tree.

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