Do Go On - 454 - The History of Ice Cream

Episode Date: July 3, 2024

This week we are joined by our dear friend Suren Jayemanne to tell us about the weird and wonderful history of ice cream. This is a comedy/history podcast, the report begins at approximately 13:31 (though as always, we go off on tangents throughout the report).Support the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: patreon.com/DoGoOnPodSupport the show on Apple podcasts and get bonus episodes in the app: http://apple.co/dogoon Live show tickets: https://dogoonpod.com/live-shows/ Watch Do Go On The Quiz Show: https://youtu.be/GgzcPMx1EdM?si=ir7iubozIzlzvWfK Submit a topic idea directly to the hat: dogoonpod.com/suggest-a-topic/Check out our merch: https://dogoon.bigcartel.com/   Twitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: [e-mail] Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/Who Knew It with Matt Stewart: https://play.acast.com/s/who-knew-it-with-matt-stewart/ Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader ThomasDo Go On acknowledges the traditional owners of the land we record on, the Wurundjeri people, in the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders, past and present Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Melbourne and Canada, we got exciting news for you. And we should also say this is 2026. Jess, what year is it? 2026. Thank God you're here. Right now, I'm in Melbourne doing my show with Serengy Amarna 630 each night at the Cooper's Inn Hotel, having so much fun. We'd love to see you there.

Canada, we are visiting you in September this year. If you've somehow missed the news, we are heading up Vancouver, Calgary, Montreal and Toronto for shows. That's going to be so much fun. Tickets for all this stuff, I believe, are online. And I'm here too. And welcome to another episode of Do Go On. My name is Jess Perkins.

And as always, I'm joined by Matt Stewart. Jess, Bob Perkins. In the house. So good to be here, Jess. Yes. It is sad because normally you're sitting here and I can touch you. But now you're sitting there and I can't. That's right.

Which I guess is probably for the best. That is sad, isn't it? That is sad. Or was it a choice? You normally reach out and try and touch my phone. fingers at least a couple times during the episode. It's because you don't realize that sort of while you're thinking or making a point, you often kind of stretch your hand out and put your hand like flat, spayed out on the table

between us. And so I always just put my hand on top of yours. Like we're playing some sort of game with hands. Yeah. It's good that the hand is that it's on the table, I think, rather than sort of higher. Agreed. Yeah. He's put it on the table and that's okay.

Champs on three. Yeah. It's that kind of energy. chips. No, no, yeah. Well, we just heard a mystery voice as well about Matt. Yeah. We have a special guest in. We do. And what a pleasure it is. Can I introduce him? Please. Well, you might know him from things like Benny and Sereni, the Talkback Radio podcast from XFM. Is there a right, XFM? Triple X. Triple X. FM. Then you've also might know him as the host of a good Tucker on SBS in Australia, the show where he explored Australia's multicultural communities and history through

cuisine. You might also know him as a regular guest on Who Knew It Was Matt Stewart. And from his report on this very podcast about a wine heist. Heist. Many years ago, maybe one. His name, if you don't know already, because you probably do. Sounds like you've forgotten. Title of the episode, Jess, give me a hint.

It's Seren, Dryabana. Hello. What a pleasure to be here. We'd love to have you. Yes. It's such a delight. Oh, by the way, Seren, you haven't asked, which I think is really fun. Dave is fine.

Okay. So you don't need to worry about him. Don't worry about him. I was concerned. No, well, you don't need to. Okay. Because we've assured you he's fine. He's fine.

And listeners at home, I'd like to say to you as well that he is fine. Don't look into it. Don't look into it. Because it would be a waste of your time. And listeners at home, I would like to point out that I did look into it. Yep. He is not fine. Wait, hang on.

Hang on. He's fine. See? That was a joke. That was a funny joke. And we'd only joke about it. If he was fine. If he was fine.

We wouldn't joke about it if he wasn't fine. And here's the thing, at this stage, dear listener, okay, he's not here for this episode. That's one episode. Yeah. He could have been busy. Yeah. You know? It's, if somebody's missing for several weeks at a time,

Sure, then come up with some conspiracy theories, of course. Be suspicious. But it's like, he's just gone. He's fine. Yeah. I think we've done pretty well there. Yeah, I think, Hannah, I'd expect to see him back someday. Someday.

Yeah. Soon. I reckon he'll turn up. You know? Yeah. I mean, there is, of course, questions about where does he start and, you know, he end? Is it, is a body? Is that who he is?

now. You have gone too far. What do you mean? No, I think it's probably just best if we get into the... I'll explain how the show works. I don't understand. I'm just saying, I don't, you know, is the soul Dave, Dave, or is the bot? Like, I think he'll turn up in some way or another. I would argue that a part of Dave's soul is inside you and I. So he's turned up here today. He's here today. He's here today. And welcome Dave. He's here and he's fine and welcome Dave. And he won't be talking, but he is here and fine. Do you want me to explain this? the show really quickly. I'll have a cracker doing it really efficiently. Okay.

So one of the three of us, Surin's sitting in for Dave this week. I've already fucked it. It's all right. But we go away and research a topic and, you know, we just bathe in it. We get in a bath and we just fill that bath to the brim. A wet desk is what we call a bath. With knowledge, that's right. We get into the wet desk.

We get soaked by knowledge on this topic. Then we put that knowledge into like a pretty basic kind of report. Something like maybe a year nine, year 10 student might. do. Certainly not your, not, not VCE. They bring it in and then, uh, they present it to the class. I don't know. No, no, I did the VCA. Yeah. So, yeah, and Serene's, uh, doing the report this week. He's done the research. He's brought the, uh, reporting. He's going to tell it to me and Jess and we will, uh, listen on, you know, and be pretty respectful, but maybe chip in with dog shit riffs sometimes, uh, tedious questions. I think when we don't know the guest as well, we tend not to

be too dog shit because we have respect for them. But when it is a friend of ours and we feel comfortable and we obviously don't have any respect for them left, they will be pretty dog shit riffs. No, and I understand how you work as like a team with Dave, like with your good friends, there's a good rapport and what you do to show love to your good friends is you disappear them and you know, and you make references to maybe they'll show up as a body, maybe not. What? Huh?

What is that? So if at any point you're in this podcast, you would like to, you know, harm me. Do you want to? I mean, I'll take that as a sign of love. I mean, you're playing a very dangerous game right now, sir, and don't cross us. Here's a thing, sir, and we have a lot of UK and US and international listeners. They don't understand the cultural nuances of the Australian act of love, which is disappearing someone. So I think to them, it probably sounds a little bit more sinister.

Yeah, exactly. But it's a cultural thing. It's a cultural thing. Yeah. And I'll take it as a sign of love. Yes. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. And hopefully if. family will too. What are you saying they don't understand the Australian culture? What? I think they get it. I understand. We do usually start with a question to get into the topic.

Do you have a question for us? I do have a question. Fantastic. If I was to tell you Jess and Matt that you were about to prepare some sort of food and these are the ingredients to use in it, this recipe calls for cream. Okay. Scones. Still scones.

Yep. Okay. That's, yeah, it's still eligible at this point. Orange flower water. Orange flower. As in the flower from an orange, or like an orange flower, I guess. It's spelled flower as in F-L-O-W-E-R. Oh.

Oh, orange flower water. Yes. And then... So the flower from an orange made into water. I think so. Yeah, okay. I've not... Orange cake.

I've only done this report to a year-9 level of competency. Of course, yeah, yeah. You're not a master chef. No, I didn't do any VSEA, so. Amber Grie is the last ingredient, which is whale vomit. Excuse me. So if those are the ingredients listed in a recipe, what are we, what am I asking you to prepare? Whale vomit.

Wait, are you... Orange flower water. Yes, sugar. Sugar and cream. The only whale vomit I know of specifically is not in scones. Pinocchio. Oh. Yes.

Oh, because he swallowed. follows up Pinocchio. And then he lights a match. Does he get vomited or does he go out the blowhole? I can't remember. I can't remember. I think it's the, I think he gets vomited.

I think it's finding Nemo where they go out the blowhole. The blowhole. Yeah. Well, Pinocchio, I think might be a little more anatomically correct. Yes. How's he getting in the blowhole? I actually don't understand whales.

Why am I getting into that? They're very big. They're big. Um, okay. Will you understand that? Well, I, that's, I would, have heard of this? So, yeah, I, okay. I'm going to take out the whale vomit for a second.

So Matt, let's just... I will also say this is not a common... This ingredient wouldn't be, if you were making a thing today, you can't be using well-women. This is the first recorded recipe of this particular thing. So Matt, think about it. If we've got like cream and sugar... Is it a cocktail?

And then like some sort of flavouring, I'm guessing, like the orange... Yeah, the orange. I agree that's a flavour. And we're just like, I guess whisk and all that together. Oh, is that a flan? Oh, not a flan. What do you call those whisked eggs? There's no egg.

Morang. Marang. Is it a meringue? Fuck, that's not bad, but that requires eggs. Yeah. I'm going to guess it would be like a, like a, like a, fuck. Like it is like an ice creamy type thing. It's a dessert.

It is. I thought it might take you longer to get there because you, you. Me or Jeff was right. It's not a scone and it's not a plan. But it's a dessert. It is a dessert. Thank you. Also, Jess said ice cream.

So we can skip through it straight to the correct answer, which is ice cream. Really? That's not. The whale vomit You figured it out It was impressive that you figured it out By excluding whale vomit From your analysis Because it's quite integral to the whole process

In that whale vomit helped things to freeze Oh That's interesting Back in those days What? Yeah I think it's something to do with the fact That if you add salt to ice

It reduces the temperature Like you can get Salt and ice will make Ice go to like negative 14 degrees or something, really? And whale vomit must be very salty. That's, whoa. I guess they're swimming around in salt.

But why not just get salt? Oh, okay. That's not bad. Yeah. Instead of, you're saying instead of whale vomit, that's an interesting idea. Yeah, yeah. I'm confused. What's the topic?

The history of ice cream. Oh. That's fun. Yeah, correctly guessed. I don't know why not just get salt. I guess it is, it probably was easier back then to just get a whale very drunk. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For their size, they're real lightweights.

Yeah, yeah. So that is interesting, though. A history of ice cream. That's what we're about to do. Yeah, about to get into it. Is that why they, like, certain countries love hunting whales? They want to just have them for their ice cream factories. Yeah.

They put them up, make them spew all day long. It's a brutal lifestyle. It is. But you get them drunk first. So they like part of the process. They're having a good time. Yeah, yeah. The hard thing is that they've, they've already killed the whale.

Oh. Before they, yeah. Oh, that's part of the hunting. You're probably going to keep them alive to get them. And actually, they probably vomit so much that you wouldn't have to have them vomiting all day. Oh, true. It'd probably be like once a week, they have a really fucking good party throw up. Yeah.

As we all did for a few years in our late teens, early 20s. Job done for the week. Yeah. And then, yeah, you just have the rest of the week off. Honestly, all of us did it. all partied. We all had lots of friends at some point in our life. We all partied. And I think a whale, you know, one of the best hangover cures is to just jump straight into the ocean. Oh, yeah. A whale's already there. Yeah. You're absolutely right. No hangover. No hangover. I have a question before you

even begin. Okay. Do you think at the end of this episode, I'm going to be like, oh, I really want to go to get ice cream because we've talked about ice cream for like an hour. I would say right off the, yeah, right off the bat. I'm feeling like I never want to eat ice cream again. Totally. Totally. That's what I mean. Am I going to be like, oh, I'm actually okay for ice cream for about a year? I reckon you, I think we might. I think you'll have a hankering. Okay, great. Because I have led with the whale vomit.

Yeah. And by the end of the report, it might even be a distant memory. Great. I hope so. And actually, knowing me and my record of remembering things, yeah, probably in the next 10 minutes, that'll be gone. I went on my way to the studio, I walked past an ice cream place and I thought I pictured us all being there together after this. That's beautiful. I'm in.

Wow, we'll see. I'll let you know at the end. Grilling them about where. whether or not they still use whale vomit. That's what I thought would be doing. Where it kept the whale? It's exciting. It was also somewhat pertinent amount that you brought up Pinocchio.

Oh. Because I will say there's probably a few lies in this. Close. What's your tell? I'd like to. I'm going to start by saying every article that I read to research this report was written was a blog on a gelato website. Great.

Okay. So it's like a gelato store. They're not biased at all. Yeah. They all have a history. They all have their own little funny. And they're telling you about vomit. Yeah.

And every article starts with a line that's like, who doesn't love eating a little ice cream on a hot summer's day? Sure, there are people who don't like it. But where did this delicious treat have its origins? Okay. So we're about to find out exciting. I love it because like Jess, Dave and I were often quoting from like, you know, Britannica and the New York Times and sort of like lofty-ish, reputable.

and you're going from gelatomann.com.com. Jolato man! Yes! I actually trust gelatoman with my life. Yeah. I mean, not the New York Post. Oh, it was a bit of a worry that they're the two

that I could think of as reputable. I'm like, oh, maybe we, I don't know. There's a lot of facts on gelatomann.com.com. Dot a.U. Yeah. No, I might have added that. Okay, so we're going to start very, at the very origins,

before it's even really, we're talking ice cream, just frozen treats, okay, if that's all right with you. Please. And you might be asking, what is the actual historical origins of ice cream? Was it Baskins or was it Robbins? Who was it? That's an age-old battle.

It was actually Hargan. Or was it Das? Was it Ben or was it Jerry? Oh, my gosh. Jeez, it's litters with duos. Yeah, duos. It's like comedy, early comedy. I'm pretty sure.

Was it Lano or was it? Or was it would be. It's like early comedy. Early comedy. Littered with you. Alan Woodley in the 90s. But the Huggandas, I'm pretty sure not to get off track too early, but that's some nonsense. Do you know that?

It's like, they just like workshopped a thing that's, it's an American brand. Oh. And they made up a phrase that sounds like Scandinavian or whatever. Yeah, right. But it doesn't mean anything. Hug and Das. Pretty fun. That is great.

That's like those, remember when you drove. past the airport. There was always a big, big billboard with a guy that looked like Steve Jobs. It was like Derucci or something. Yeah, that's right. And it was like a furniture guy. Yeah. Design a furniture. But it was, and it was meant to sound like Italian furniture, but it was like some Chinese company that they were doing the Hagenas thing. Yeah, he was just an actor. Duruci. Yeah. So he wasn't even, yeah, so the idea, we're all sort of believe that this is a guy. It's like Guzman and Gomez, right? Yeah. That's just, that's some white Australians. Yes, that's true. Which is interesting.

Yeah, because Guzman sounds more. like a Russian name or something. But the Derucci guy, I didn't know he was an actor, that'd be, that'd ruin your acting career. You'd take one job and then you could, you'd be auditioning for roles and be like, don't you have a furniture empire and a run? Aren't you too busy?

You can't be an actor. You can't be a villain in this movie. You're that beloved furniture guy. Okay, so, obviously ancient societies, they didn't have ice cream, but ice and snow was very, common to as a use in creating like frozen drinks or treats and because back in the day ice they didn't have fridges you know what I mean yeah they didn't have means of storing so they had to go and

get it pretty much they were harvesting ice and uh from snow and it would be it was quite common in like the middle east and sort of Mediterranean kind of environments that what they would do is they would get ice during the winter months and then they had to develop technology to basically store the ice in the summer because those places were so hot and they wanted to have these sweet treats. And so their first recorded appearance of an ice house for storing snow from the mountains comes from a cuneiform tablet from around 1780 BC. Wow. Wow. Okay. And it states that the king of Mari and Mari is like one of the states along the

Euphrates, where we would now call it Syria. He built an ice house which never before had been built by any king. Wow. Okay. Normal people had them all the time, but kings. Kings didn't have them. They were above the ice house. But I looked into it and there's no historians nor I have come across a cuneiform tablet

that states otherwise. Okay. So yeah, because it's like, you know, if you want to discredit this cuniform tablet, you better have a pretty legit cuniform tablet. I have to be honest, I don't think I know how fridges or freezes. work now. No. So it is always very impressive to me

when people have figured stuff out in the past. Yeah. Wow. And these things are crazy. They actually still use these in some places in like Iran and, which was then Persia and those kind of countries. They had these things called yukchalz. Okay.

And what that was, it sort of looks like a giant beehive. And underneath the ground, there would be like a square. chamber, I guess, which is when they harvest the ice from the mountain, they would put it into these chambers underground. And then above the ground was this beehive structure, which was kind of made of clay, sand, ash, goat hair, and lime. They would like make that into a mortar, which would be around the thing to kind of waterproof it. And then they would build like little aqueducts alongside it, which would catch the wind that comes in. So any water that melted in the chamber of ice beneath this yukchal would have like

a little channel of wind that would come through to re-freeze it overnight. Because of the cold desert winds at night. And this is, I'm talking like 550 BC, these yuk churls. They date back to at least that. That was when the first ones were kind of dated back to. but they probably were around storing ice from even earlier than that. So that's 2,500 years ago. The odds that the right, the first ever tablet mentioning them was found

and even that that tablet started talking about it like soon after it was. Normally you find these historical documents and they're mentioning it as if it's been around for a while. Yeah. Because they're using words that are like, obviously people understand what this means. Exactly. And the cuneiform, the cuneiform tablet. was probably like it might, yeah, like you're saying, the invention of being able to document stuff

probably happened after this ice storage. And so if you are the king and the first pens around, you'd be like, just right, yeah, I invented that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No one's got, no one's had pens before. That was one of mine. Yeah. So there's no other history before this.

I started the first blog and it said, yeah, I came up with the internet pretty good. Yeah. This is me. Yeah, I'm gelatom man.com. So essentially what I'm trying to say is before you can use ice in a desert, you have to store ice in the desert. So that, yeah, it's...

Because it's all well and good to have a surplus of ice in winter. But a slushy just isn't quite as satisfying a whole day, is it? You don't need to... But on a hot day? On a hot day. Oh my God. Yeah. They have to do the same with hot water.

So in... They would boil. Their lakes would boil in the summer. And they'd collect that. They had to collect those. Yes. And they had to build structures. Yep.

With reverse aqueducts. Yeah. It's actually like the opposite. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, there's a chamber above ground. Yeah, it's above ground.

Yeah. And the beehive is underneath. Yeah, that's right. Because hot air rises. Yeah. So it's interesting. But I saw that on a cuneiform tablet, actually. Wow.

I don't think I ever really put it together. Like, you know that there's a classic Simpsons episode. about Bobo the Bear, which is Mr. Burns's teddy, but it starts off with this ice expedition. Yeah. And they take the ice to the Quicemar, I think, and the guy's like,

we lost three men on this expedition. There's got to be an easy way to make ice. But I'm like, that's just a funny, like, a surreal, silly joke, but it's basically, they used to have to do that. Yeah, they would send teams up to the mountains to collect ice.

Amazing. And it's, they call it like half a story. Yeah. So it's like, yeah, going into the ground to get minerals or like foraging for different things. And now you just get moulds in all sorts of fun little shapes. You can make any shape you want. Put it under a tap, put it in your freezer. Yeah.

And you got ice. You can get a giant little cube that you put into your whiskey. Yep, you can get a ball to put into your whiskey. You can put a little love heart. That's a bit of fun. What are the things called again, the underground? Yuck Charles. Yuck Charles.

Yeah, put it in your freezer all year. Yuck child. Well, it's funny you say that because in Iran, are they still, That's still the word. Oh. And it's so it translates roughly to ice pit, but that's what they would call a fridge in Iran. Cool. Cool.

Cool. It's a great name. It's way better than fridge. Yeah. Or refrigerator. Boring. I'm a yuck chel salesman. I go shopping for a new yukchal this weekend.

Mine's on the fritz. I think, I think Yukchal is now, that might have supplanted chili bun as my favorite term for a place to put cold stuff. In New Zealand, that's what they call. like a portable. Oh yes. A cooler. What we call an escler. Americans would call it a cooler.

We call it an esky, which is just a brand. I've heard Chillibon before. Is it though, we say it as if it's one word. Chillebun. But it's just in the accent. They're saying chili bin. Yeah, yeah. It's their poor enunciation.

Yeah. And then we speed it up and we're like, oh, Chiliban. Chollibon. Yeah. I love it. Chullibon. Like they call Fongley Jandals. God, that place rules.

I learned so much from Tony Martin's old sketches with he did a sketch on the radio back in the 90s maybe about Tom and Foll. They used to go, oh, we've just, we've got the feed from Tom and Foll's Tim and Phil's New Zealand radio show. Hi, I'm Tom. Hi, I'm full. We're going to do a prunk today. I'm talking about like calling the Muss and persons agency. And then it rings here, hey, is this the Muslim person's agency?

Yes, it is. It is the Muslim person's agency. We'd like to report a musin pair of jondels. Jandals, I think there's been a misunderstanding. We are the missing persons agency. This is where you report Muslim persons. Are Jandals just a comfy bit of footwear? So fun.

It's good stuff. Good stuff. I wouldn't have heard that for 30 years, but it's still, and I would be butchering it, of course. No, no, no. It would be annoying if you were trying to call up the missing persons agency and you're on hold because someone's trying to report missing jangels. And you're like, excuse me, Dave's gone missing.

And he's fine. Dave Warnocky. Wait, what? Huh? Why did you use that name specifically? We don't have to report him missing. We know where he is. He's fine.

He's fine. Yeah. So the Persians didn't have ice cream as we know it today. But what they did have is in these yuck trials, they would store ice. But it also became like we would use a freezer today or a fridge today, a place to store like meat or fruits or anything cake in the freezer. Wedding cake. That's a tradition of it. Or, um, um,

What is that tradition? I have no idea. I think you then eat it on your first anniversary or something. Oh, right. If you make it. That's sweet. Bit arrogant. We'll be together in a year.

Freak down. Get the fuck over yourself. Jesus Christ. Get the fuck over yourself. That's what I say to them. Nothing's permanent. Nothing last fair. I was saying that to Dave just last week.

Yeah. That's what I say to it. Don't plan too far ahead Dave, I said to him. Yeah. You did say that. I did say that to them. Very clearly. that to everybody on their wedding day.

Yeah. He needed to learn that lesson. Yeah. Yeah. And I thought I could teach it to him whether I did or not. By showing love. I don't care to say. So yeah, they would save stuff.

Yeah, they'd save them so that way they could enjoy them during the hot summers. So fruit, dairy, meat and that kind of thing. And basically what happened was they realized that when you freeze fruit is quite delicious. Oh. And so this was probably some of the earliest records we have of, according to gelatomann.com, of like... It will be so funny when there's someone who's like an expert in this area and I go, that was all nonsense. Gelato man has been discredited by the industry. You have tried frozen grapes, delicious.

No. Yum. Really? Yeah, frozen grapes, it is like... I don't understand. As a summer treat, if you... If you are health conscious or you can't get your hands on ice cream, you freeze some grapes. Also, banana is a great one to freeze.

Oh, yeah. You know what you can do is you put jelly crystals on the grapes and then freeze them and then they have like a... A popping. Yeah, they got like a fun little flavour to them as well. Would they just be like balls of ice, wouldn't they? Not quite as hard. Okay. Yeah.

Yeah, the texture of it gets slushy-ish. Oh, okay. Oh, that does sound good. But it's also sweet. Yeah. What do you go, red or green? I'm a green. Green grape girl.

I was hard to say. Yeah, good question because I'm a red wine drinker, but a green grape eater. Yeah. Yeah. Isn't that interesting and exciting? That is. It's just fun to learn things about your friends. Yeah.

That's the equivalent of like a footballer who handballs with his right hand and kicks with his left, you know? Next time I'm invited to Sorinz for a dinner party, I know what kind of wine to get and what kind of grapes. You know what kind of grapes? You know what I mean? Yeah. That's nice. And I'll serve, perhaps at my party, my dinner party, a Faluda. Have you heard of these? No.

Faludas. Okay, so it's like a Persian, it's very common in the Middle East. Different cultures have... Faluda matato? A version of Faluda. Yeah, there's no worries. Yeah. I've heard of it in that context.

For the rest of my days. Yeah. Because now, even when the weather gets hot, we have figured out how to stay cool. Because of the... Yuck Chal. Yachtchall. That's a word that. It will not stick, but I love it so much.

It's a shame. Or if you're in New Zealand, the Chillebun. Cholibon. But a faluda, it's like a starchy. It's like noodles made of some sort of starchy thing. And then they mix that with like syrup or honey that has been chilled on the ice. So the earliest, like dating back to these discoveries of Yuck Charles, the faluda doesn't come long after.

Yeah, right. So that's kind of faluda or this. word might sound familiar to you. Shabbat. Oh, Shabbat. Is that a religious thing? Well, that's the Sabbath, I guess, which I think in Hebrew that it sounds, they would pronounce it like Shabbat.

Right. But this is not that. This is Shabbat, which is like, which is a fruit syrup that's been served with honey that's chilled on the snow, basically. And then they would pour in milk and sugar. Oh, that sounds like. And so it's kind of similar to what we'd call a greneter. Ah.

Pretty much what they're doing is they're crushing up the ice and they're flavoring it with some sort of sweet thing. They do that in Hawaii, like shave ice. Yeah. Delicious. Yeah. It's just syrup over ice. Exactly.

You're essentially eating, it's eating a slurpy. Yeah. Rules. As to put, as normally you would sort of slurp it. Yeah. Yeah. It's just, it's a, it's not as wet as slurpy. No.

It's just the ratios are different. It's just at a different stage of its life. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. You give a shave ice a couple of minutes. It's a slurpy. It's slurpy. It's slurpy.

The name. broadly or is that like the 7-11 version of a slushy? I think it's a 7-11 version, yeah. It is the Kleenex to tissues. Right, yeah, yeah. Or the Hoover to precedence. Oh, just to damned. But so Sharbut is, and I might be mispronouncing that,

I don't know if you have any Persian listeners, but the... Drake Gillenhall, I think. Wow, really? No, but he was... You don't know what I'm saying, really, too. No, that's true. Am I saying it to him being Persian? Or to him being a list?

He was cast as the Prince of Persian or it was controversial. Oh, okay. Well, yeah. A bit of fun. A little bit of fun. Does Sharbat sound like anything to you? Sharbet, I mean, it sounds a bit like Sherbet, but also Sharbet is like the Jewish day of rest.

Yes, which I think Saran just said before, but Jess wasn't listening then, obviously, but Saran also did point at you. You're correct. You're two for two so far. Yeah. Sharbot would be the root word for Sherbet. I've actually been hearing and watching. It's crazy.

Well, I just, I thought I might have caught you doing a me. So, yeah, Sharbet is the root word for Sherbert, which, and also the root word for anything, can anything else you can think of this ice cream related? Really? Sobe. Really? So it comes from, from that. And Sherbert was like originally, yeah, I guess a Turkish thing that was.

It's like, it's not like there's little lemon lollies that we call sherbet. Or the powder. Whizfiz is like a shirbit. Oh, yeah, Wizfiz is like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Fucking love whizhiffs. And did you have them when you were kids, there was like straws and they were filled with different colors of this sort of sherbetty powder? Yeah.

And you. Yeah. It was sort of like the original, the introduction to, um, grubs. Oh, pixie sticks. Yeah. It's a gateway. Yeah. Yeah.

No. Sherbet. Yeah. Marijuana is the, what, the gateway to what? You're well and truly. walk through the gate by the time you're smoking marijuana. The gate is the WISFIS. Yeah.

Yeah. Because we'd line them up. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I would say like, you know when you were a kid and you would just sort of spin around until you become dizzy? Yeah. That's the gateway. Yeah. Any sort of thing of escaping. Diz, then Ries fizz. Yep.

Uh, then meth. Yes. That's how. That's how. That's how. That's how. That's how. That's a usual progression.

And again, that might be. cultural thing. Oh, yeah, sure. That might be an Australian thing. So, Shabbat, so it's like they, they, they, uh, they love the Shabbat because of its cooling effect in the hot months in these hot climates, but also they believed at that time that they were medicinal properties and probably because they're using ingredients like saffron and rose water, those kinds of things to flavor the ice.

And so, um, it feels like every recreational drug and every dessert and everything smoking, everything at some point. Someone's trying to convince you. They're like, this is medicinal. Like Coca-Cola started out being sold at chemists of pharmacies. Yeah. Yeah, it's medicinal. It's good for you.

This, yeah, the cigarettes ones are the funniest. They're like really good for asthma. Yeah. And something like, oh, is that so? Yeah. Putting smoke into your lungs. Yeah, yeah. It helps, yeah, it smokes them out, which is good.

It's, what? Cigarettes are great for asthma because what they will do is they will make you have to go to the doctor to get a ventalentily. Yeah. And that is really good for us. That is good stuff, yeah. The Persians also had a particular fondness for sour flavors, which is probably why we associate Sherbet with the word Sherbet,

along with flower petals and herbs. So there's often like other tart juices, like pomegranate, lemon, sour, cherry, that kind of thing, that they would be mixing into these shaved ice. Another root word for Shabbat is this word, shrib. Shrub. Shrub. Like shrub.

I guess so. I didn't follow that thread any further. I just thought it was fun to say shrub. Shrub. Yeah. You were right. It is fun to say shrub. Shrub. Then not long after these invention of these things, Yuck Charles, the reports of the pharaohs in ancient Egypt offering guests when they have like esteemed guests and banquets and that kind of thing, they give them crushed ice or snow with mixed fruit jerseys and flowers and sweet ingredients. So it's starting to become like, You, it's so hard to get ice. You're losing men going up the mountain, harvesting the ice, that if you have ice and you can present treats and delicacies with ice, it's like a display of prowess. Yeah.

Yeah. So it's like a luxury. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Unlike now, you can just have a whole tub of it in your fridge. Yeah, often you'll go to Coles and the connoisseurs on sale. Yep. You get cookies and cream. You finish it that night?

Easy peasy. Similar, I'd love you to come back one day and do one about the spice. Trades. It was a similar thing. So many people died trying to get these spices and now it's like, you know, there's a supermarket aisle. You're just alphabetized? Yeah, yeah. I did actually, that was one topic that I did think about. I think I've, I've seen it in a half. I think I'm staking a claim as a sort of the foodie.

Yeah, you're the foodie. Oh, I love that. Yeah. Great. You've done wine. I'll stake a claim and I'll claim some stakes. But there's a lot of theories that are, so there's competing theories. Gelato Man has one theory that the Persians were one of the first. But like, basically, a lot of the ancient cultures discovered that if you put sweet things with ice, it's a good time.

Yeah. Okay. And we're not talking about meth. Okay. It doesn't go with fish, dis, and then ice. Okay? It's just ice and a little bit of honey. But there's another theory.

I don't know. I couldn't find much about this theory as to verify it or not, but I thought it was fun. So I'd like to share it with you. Please. There is a theory that ice cream, as we know, in terms of using dairy, came about in Mongolia, the origins of using dairy as an iced dessert. And this theory goes that Mongolian horsemen who were travelling around... Are we talking like part horse pot, man?

I think... Is that what are you saying? I think what we're talking about... Because I'm starting to lose a little faith in gelato man. Yeah. Well, centaurs. Is he talking centaurs? Because that's why I'm losing face on the thing, because he's used the wrong term there.

That's right. Mongolian sentles. Yes. My bad. Genghis Khan was known for, um... Yeah, his horse legs. Yeah. Yeah, a lot of people focused on the fact that he, uh, you know, had a lot of...

The conquest and he had a lot of concubines. Yeah, all the territory that he gained and all that sort of stuff. But just glossed completely over the fact that he had four legs. Yeah. It's very easy. to do that when you have four legs and it's very easy to have a lot of concubines when when you hung like a horse. Yeah. Which he literally was. They don't ever, when they go into those half men like minotaur, centaur or whatever, they're never really focusing on the

on the junk reproductive organs. Maybe they're just, they're just trying to be polite. Yeah. You know. Yeah, yeah. But it leaves a lot to the imagination is all I'm saying. Yeah, because it's right at that cut off, isn't it? It's right at that line. where one becomes the other. Exactly. Which side of the line is it on? Nothing's ever perfect, you know. You're getting a bit from both sides of the genetic tree.

So it might be getting the balls. Human balls? And horse slong. Or you win slong. Or human slung and horse balls. You don't want that. No. You don't want that.

Because that's going to make the human slong look even less impressive. Even less. Yeah. I think you want. I want to jump in here too. Please. I think because, okay, you imagine a centaur, front on, right?

Basically looks like a man. Yes. Just standing there. Pretty, pretty impressive legs, but front on. It's straight back, isn't it? That horse body is straight back so you don't get that view. But so if you have got like, a lot of junk in the trunk. Although, can I just quickly interject?

Sure. Before, when you, can I ask, when you look at a horse front on, do you think he's up on his two front legs? I don't know what's going on behind. That's a man with a weird head. Is that what you think? What the long face, fella? Anyway, sorry.

No, I just think, so you don't want, like, human genitals where human genitals usually are, because then they're just right there dangling. That's well, like, yeah. It'd be like, too chained. Yeah. That'd be terrible. That'd be horrific. So you want it where the horse junk goes.

It's out of the way. And the best thing about horse junk is the best thing about it. That's a phrase I regret saying. Um, is it, it's retractable. We don't have that. Yeah. Oh. The first time, um, I saw, uh, a horse, uh, have a piss. I was a kid. And it was confronting. Yes. Because it just goes, holl. Yeah. It drops out of nowhere. Oh. And then it's just a power hose. Yeah. And then, back it goes. Well, I don't remember it going back in, but I

assume it has to. Yeah. But I don't just drop once and then. I didn't know that. So it's like, have you seen on, um, television if you watch it recently. they have these commercials. And one of them that I've seen is, you know, Al Balland from Home Improvement? Yeah, yeah. He's now the man, not Al Ballin, but he's now advertising a hose that's made from a special copper compound. I don't think so, too. It's sort of, I do, do, do, do do do do do do do.

That's probably the best way to finish that thought. Have you ever seen, have you ever seen the footage of a grandfather, a. AFL, Aussie rules grand final in the 90s and it was when home improvement was big and the game's about to start Bruce McAvaney like the voice of AFL football is there

doing a thing to camera the game's about to start Al Bolan walks in and the Channel 7 sports sign is dangled and he said oh I can fix that for you and he hammers it back on in character as Al Ball and says all right no worries and walks off it's so weird

that's so funny that the biggest day on sporting calendar in Australia. They couldn't get Tim. They just got to be sidekick. He's the best celebrity. We won't go with anyone from Australia. We're flying out Al Ballin. And then because like a band, you'd get him to play.

What do you get Al Ballin to do? Fix a sign and a weird sketch. And then leave. So strange. Very odd. So this is the Mongolian theory is that the horsemen, they were traveling across the deserts and stuff. And they would go on the,

these long journeys across the Gobi Desert. And in winter, what they would do is they would, like, fill up these animal intestines with provisions to, um, so that they could store them. That's just called feeding an animal. Or you mean that there's other animals. They're not horse and, yeah, but, but they would use. In the intestines, not still inside a working animal. Not instead.

Yeah. Yeah. They're using it as a receptacle. But they would use it as a receptacles to store food for their journey to keep it fresh and one of the food that they would store in there is cream. And because of the gentle clop-clop of the horse, what would happen is that as they travel through frozen environments, the desert when it's cold,

the sub-zero temperature combined with the clop-clop would sort of churn the cream. It's clip-clop, surely. Yeah, it is clip-clop. But also I like, I think... This horse is, is it a two-legged horse? It's only got left feet? Clop-clop-clop. Yeah, there's no clipping going on.

But the listeners also need to know the movement Soren's doing because I think the sort of waving movement plus the clop-clop and the cream. It's really, it's painting a picture. Is that where the name clopped cream comes from? No, that's not anything. Is that a name? Clotted cream, doesn't matter. So clopped cream. So it's kind of churning it.

Yeah. Wow. And so that's one theory of the origins of sort of a dairy-based. Nice. Doesn't that sound nice? Slowly curdling. In an intestine. Dairy inside intestine, which I'm guessing is picking up a bit of the juices from that intestine.

I guess one of the early flavors would be, yeah, horse intestine. Or yeah. Mongolian intestine. We don't use intestines and bladders and stuff like we used to. No, we used them for balls. Oh, yeah. Early footballs were bladders. But yeah, now what do they do?

Go on the bin, I guess. We're a lot more sustainable back then. Yeah. They probably end up in sausages. Right? Do I mean? No, they probably, most definitely, I'd say so. But not only for dog food, you know.

Oh, yeah. Dogs get all the weird bits. But that's a lot of nutrition in there. Yeah. Beautiful for their coat. I think we're missing out. Do you want some kibble? I'll bring you some.

Kibble. That sounds good. I don't know what it is, but it sounds good. You don't know what kibble is. Little biscuits to give to your dog. Oh, well, I don't have a dog. Filled of intestine. Kibble.

In China, around 1600 BC, they're getting buffalo milk and they're freezing it with rice by packing it into snow. And apparently one of the emperors, Emperor Tang, around 600. It's he the guy who came up with the drink. His first name was Light and. Oh, this is a chip man. Light and Tang. From the Thins Empire.

I don't think other places have Light and Tangy. Don't they? I'm not sure. Right. Oh, so you want to explain that for you international listeners? No, they've got Google. But I mean, I'm always so stoked when we have anything that is unique. I know. Uniquely Australia. There's so few things that are. So a flavour of chip.

Light and tangy crisps. Delicious. What flavor are they? Yeah, what would you describe it? There's some paprika in there. Green and red. Green and red. Red. Green and red dust, delicious. It's good stuff. And it is, I would say, pretty light and little tangy. A little bit of tangy. As a child, that was my favourite flavour.

Same. I think even today... If you get a good packet... Yeah, it holds up. Sometimes you get a packet because you're feeling nostalgic and there's barely any flavouring on it and I'm like, how fucking do you? But if you get a good packet, lots of flavouring, nothing better. It's a little bit too much emphasis on the light.

Yes. I want emphasis on the tang. Yes. You've got a little light on the light and tang. But yeah, so this guy, Emperor Tang, and this is about... 100 years later in 600 AD, he's obsessed with like these frozen desserts. And he has a team of 90 slaves who, as you were referring to, Matt, he would send them up to the mountains to gather fresh snow. And he called them his ice men.

Icemen. And that's because they were usually quite frosty towards him. They didn't like being sent up to the snow. And they were like, emperor, you're a bastard. Really? Yeah, Gilliator Man has taken some liberties With this history They would speak that way to their emperor.

That is ice cold. Wow. I would say that, yeah, Jolato Man's taken some liberties And then on top of that, I've added my own flavoring. Obviously in India as well, they had Kulfi.

Have you ever had Kulfi? No. So Kofi means, translates to covered cup. But it's a dessert that originated probably again in the Persian Gulf, but in the Mergel Empire in the 16th century, that's when India really takes it over.

And it's basically dense evaporated milk, but they are mixing in pistachios, saffron, and like other sweeteners, and they're packing it into little metal cones. And it's like, again, very much the Mergel emperor, they're the big guys that went through, like, they were like kind of the Arab people that came into India and conquered it

and then went through, Asia and South Asia and stuff. And they, it's a real delicacy. Yeah. It's like, yeah. A real luxury again. And they're using salt pito, which is, again, a salty type thing to help refrigerate and create freezing temperatures. Do you know much about the, what, when was, did you say the Arabs conquered parts of India?

Yes. When was that approximately? I think around like 15th, 16th century. I don't know too much about. All I know is that they were called the moops. Oh, the moops. Yeah. So I'm going to have to accept the Moops.

Oh, no. It's the moops. Do you want me to quickly tell you what I've found about Light and Tangie? Yeah, I'd love to. This is according to junkfood betty.com. And I think she probably works in cahoots with the gelatin. I think they know each other well. So she's, I think she's American and was sent a bag by an Australian.

And she didn't know what any of it meant. So she's like Thins, she described as like lays. Yes. Yep, that would be accurate. That's equivalent, yeah. Yep. She said, Thins, light and tangy had a nice vinegar bite with an equal amount of tang. I could identify, I could definitely identify some onion in there, but it wasn't sour cream and onion flavoured.

Perhaps a bit of ranch flavouring. I think ranch could count as tangy. I won't lie, I did look up the ingredients only after I'd taste of the chip. Some of the ingredients are vegetable powders, onion tomato. flavor, natural, flavor enhancer, 621 and herbs and spices. It's all so vague. I couldn't taste any tomato, but the rest seemed on point. Of course, I have no idea what 621 flavor enhancer is, but hey, it's MSG.

It's MSG. Is it really? Yeah, there you go. No wonder light and tangy taste so good. Yeah, it's MSG. Well, the packet just has tomato, like, as in on the front. You know how it's got. Oh, the pictures, yeah.

It's a picture of a bowl of chips, and then next to it is a tomato and some paprika. Oh, there you go. some like maybe pepper corn. That's all they're giving away. They don't put a little bag of Aginimoto MSG there. Yeah, what she says? She enjoyed the taste. They have a nice balance of vinegar salt and a present,

but not overwhelming ranch-like flavor. Nothing crazy or groundbreaking, but a fine snack nonetheless. Three and a half out of five, kudos for using the moniker light for seemingly no reason at all. Oh, they're pretty, like they're not a dense chip. Yeah. You know, they're a thin. I mean, the company's called Thins.

Yeah. They're a thin cut chip. Yeah. They're light. You can eat a whole packet. It'd be bold if they're referring to the weight with the light. Yeah, they're really patting out the description there. Yeah.

I think it's a lightly flavoured chip. She did bang on about how the ranch type flavour was pretty light. Texture is important. Like read your own words, Betty. Come on, Betty. Come on, Betty. Come on, Betty is. I don't know if Betty is.

No, I love Betty. I love junk food Betty. But let's get back to the history of. ice cream. Okay. I wonder what her thoughts are on it. So we're going to jump forward now to the European continent. And there's some conjecture about this. There's some theories I'd like to share about how ice cream came to be in the European context. One of them is that the Arabs who were travelling around, the Moops went to India,

it's believed that maybe the Arab sports shrib to Italy or Shabbat to Italy. another theory is that Marco Polo saw it when Emperor Tang, like it was popular in China and then when Marco Polo went to China, he saw it there and he got a recipe and brought it back to Italy. So there's a bit of conjecture about that. How did, what we're interested in now, though, is not Shrib, but how did Sorbetto evolve to July? There's conjecture that Mark

Polo ever made it to China, isn't there? Or is there not? There is conjecture about that. So that's part of, that would probably rule it out. If he never even went there, which is the same. There's like a myth about that the Italians got pasta from seeing noodles. From the same thing, right? Yeah, I think from Marco Polo.

But I reckon, how do you know if Marco Polo made it to China or not? Oh, well, you call that his name. Exactly. But if he's to win the game, he's meant to avoid you. But he's asked to say his name. And if you can hear it in China, Polo. True. Then you know he's in China.

China. Yeah. Unless someone else is just saying polo, but that'd be weird. That'd be weird. But someone might have been very far from him and they're calling out Marco and they can't hear the poll. Yeah, because China's quite big. I don't know if you know that.

Is it really? Yeah. It's actually, yeah, it's pretty, like you could definitely, um, be in two different places in China and not hear each other. Is that for sure? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Was China China back then? Um, great question.

You know what I mean? What's China? Or was it like many, smaller kingdoms sort of thing? Probably smaller kingdoms. Some of them within earshot and some of them not. What are we doing? We're having a great time. We're having a bit of fun.

Having fun with friends. Okay. So here are some theories about how crushed ice that's flavoured evolves to gelato. And which a lot of consensus is that this happened in Italy. So there's Sicilian people who are making sorbetto, which is just like kind of water-based sweet ice. and then a fisherman from Sicily creates the first gelato by using snow from Mount Etna to make a creamy dessert that he would sell from his boat

while he's sailing around the coastline of Sicily and then because of the popularity of this other fishermen start making gelato as well and it's sort of their competition that sparks the start of this race war to... It's not a race. Race... Race slash and or war.

Gotcha, yes. It's not a race for yet. It's a race. It's a war. It's not a race. No. Yes. There's another.

It's a man. It's a horse. It's a man. It's not a horse man. Yeah. There's a theory that there's a guy called Cosimo Urukieri. And he's an alchemist and he works in the court of Catherine Medici. And she later goes on to be the queen of France when she marries a guy.

a guy called Henry and I think it's probably only I was literally thinking the exact same thing that's what I was thinking that's why I did a big pause

I was like I've pronounced that wrong that's probably on right only I love how French they it changes the words like as a kid there was a tennis player called who I thought

was guy forget but it was gee forget but it's like it looks G-Y-U-U- Guy, Forget, F-O-R-G-E-T, Guy, forget.

G-Y-U. G-U-Y. Just double-taking. Forget. Forget? Yeah. Well, that's what I did and I accidentally spelled it wrong,

but that's better, don't it? That could have been the spelling, and I made it yet. Also, Guy is the kind of name you'd have when you were prone to forgetting you. Mm. Hey, Guy. Yeah.

Good to see, guy. Ah, forget. But yeah, so there's one theory is that this guy... Forget. Another version of that name would be He knows them Bro missed my place Bro, where was I again?

Where am I? Oh yeah, Guy Something you should know doing reports on the show This is the first time you've done one with me here No, I'm enjoying it It's, yeah, it sucks And hopefully it gets fixed in the attic Please, AJ make me less tedious

So, uh, guy, I think the running joke is just a hard break back to the report so far. Yeah. Yeah, it works. Yeah, great. It's kind of the only way to keep it going. Cosimo Rigieri, he works for Catherine Demichi, and she has a sweet tooth. And so he creates this flavour, which is we know today as Fiore di Late, which means flour of the milk.

And he's serving it to her. and it doesn't contain egg or cream. So this is why some people think that this is likely to be the first kind of gelato that's like... Yeah, okay. Just milk-based, basically. Just a sweetened milk that he's churning. Using this kind of icy technology or icy idea that's come from either China or maybe the Arabs brought to Italy. Another theory, which I like, is about Bernardo Bontalante.

And I like it because... Bwon Talente, it would mean good talent. Yeah. So you're bound to do good things. Yeah. That's just nominative determinism. And he is an architect, an artist and an engineer, which I would say... He's got good talent.

He's got good talent. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's multi-talented. He's multi-talented, which is a good thing. If he... He'd be a great contestant on Italy's good talent, I think. Yeah, one of my favourite shows. It's good talent

I think we've found him Or Italo Bon Talent Anyway he likes to experiment Because he's got good talent And so he comes up with this recipe for like a richer creamier kind of Ice treat Gelato a crema

And that he's using egg now And so this is around 1565 That some of his recipes apparently were first discovered. Don't you think this is something we could do, like we could reinvent the game by going, let's get even more cream in again. You know what I mean?

Yeah. That's what he's done. Why don't we find out whatever the creamiest ice cream is now and go double it? Let's see what happens when you just add more cream. Add more cream. Let's just freeze cream. Yeah. Don't add anything.

That's right. I think I could tell you what would happen. Okay. Now we're on. Okay, should I call up some shop fronts? Yes. Yes. Yes.

Yeah. Because this is going to be huge. This is going to be huge. Shop fronts, let's get some vans. Yeah, okay. Vans. We're going to be in a factory. We might even be able to drive this around.

Fantastic. Okay. We drive it around. We play some music. I've been looking for somewhere to put this jingle I've come on with. Uh-huh. Dun-dan-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun. Dun dun dun dun dun that's genius man

You know what we could do with that That almost sounds like medieval Yeah yeah I'm playing on a lute Cool Yeah yeah I reckon we use that Okay We play that

We drive around with the van We play Dun dun dun dun dun And then I was singing What do you think Jess Do you think when you hear that Immediately what do you think of My mouth is watery

Yeah Okay great I could really go a treat That would be underneath And then over the top I'm just going Ice group Oh, it's crud!

Okay. I'm losing you a little bit with those. Okay. But... Well, no, no bad idea. So your mouth is stopped watering. Yes. Yeah, that's a drive.

My mouth is driving. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. What about? Tough biz. Okay. What about...

Yeah, don't worry about what we're up to anyway. It's probably too cool for you. Oh. Yeah. We're just in this van, chilling out, listen to some tunes. Yeah. Yeah, probably better, you'd be probably better if you don't follow and see what we're going.

No, now it's actually feeling like you're about to kidnap me. Oh, okay. Yeah, you have gone too far there. Okay. All right, well, let's just scrap the talking altogether. Yeah. Just play the loop. I think that's good.

So, Catherine Medici, she obviously falls in love with this sweet and treat that the Bontalante has made. Yep. And when she goes to marry King, he's not yet the King. He's the Duke of Orleans, but his name is Orion. Is that old or leans? And he's only two. Oh, he is well. He's the second onui.

Oh, okay. So I don't think he had a choice in how to pronounce it. Yeah, it was already locked in. First one, Henri one might have been like, it's Henry one. Yeah. But he went with on me. Yep. All we.

And so. He said, you know what? I don't care what letters are in this word. I'm not going to say any of them. Yeah. And I'm the first one to do it. So I get to choose. There's a cuneiform.

And I'm saying on that. It's allie, allie. So that, so basically because of Gilada's popularity in Italy, Medici, she loves it, she takes it to France. And that's where France becomes, you know, it started to be being sold in the, in the royal courts there. And it's like, if you are a king, if you've got a chef, because back in those days, it was like, it was only the royal courts that had chef.

Kings aren't doing their own cooking? Kings aren't doing their own cooking. Poor, must be nice. Must be nice. Must be real nice. Oh, but don't you think of cooking as a bit of a treat, you know? It's sort of almost like a meditation. No.

It's like cathartic, yeah. I don't. I can do it. I don't enjoy it. Okay. Yeah. You are a king. That means you're a king.

I am a king. There is one king who still does his own cooking, and he is the burger king. I wouldn't call that cooking I was so sure you're going to say Jamie Oliver or something like that I thought you're going to say yourself or something like that's cute Burger King is very funny that's good stuff write that down What's the angry chef called? Gordon Ramsey

Gordon Ramsey I don't want to say Galton Ramsey or Huey Huey and the news No Big Huey Huey's cooking adventures He's coming down.

Never trust a skinny chef. He's an angry guy, apparently. Is he? No. I do not believe it. I feel it's like an Ellen DeGeneres global kind of scandal. I would refuse to believe that. No, la, la, la, la, la, la.

I will not hear this set about Huey. Well, you both have good instincts because I just made that. I think Arnie Donner used to, they, their old rehearsal space was, uh, rented off head. Yeah, it was his studio and, like, I think it's like, he's signage up and stuff. That's amazing. Yeah. Aunty Donna and Big Huey.

So they just left. it in that he had his own studio, no one was using it for years. Am I thinking that, right? I remember, you went there. Didn't we go there to see a rehearsal, like a dry run or something or something? I don't think so. Hmm. I might have made all of that up then.

Wow. Because I, in my head, Jess was in that memory. No. But much like Dave is always, Dave Sol is always with us. Yes. I am actually in all of your memories. Yeah, I put you in post. Yeah, that's right.

So in France, thanks to the Queen of France, Catherine, ice cream has taken off a little bit, or gelato, sorry. And then a little later on in the 1600s, French King Louis the 14th. So many louis. There are so many Lewis. He's not even, that's early Louis. 14 is like early Louis. I think eventually you get into like 20s.

Really? I think so. I've got a friend Louis now. Isn't that crazy? What number? I feel like you don't. They stop counting. Oh, okay.

Yeah, I don't know what number he is. Yeah, yeah. I'm just saying you don't hear Louis as much in modern times. No. I feel. Yeah, I was at a dog park the other day. That was a Louis. Okay.

It might have been him. It was a cock of Spaniel. He is a dog, yeah. I think that's our names evolved. They get retired from humans eventually and they become dog name. Once you hit too many count, we can't keep count anymore. You're like, ah, let's give it to a dog. It's like dog years, human names.

It's all the same. Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. Every. You know, back in like the, I think it was probably the 20s, 30s, a lot of men called goose. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You don't see a man named goose anymore. No. My dog's name. Yeah, I mean, it's been retired. It'll come back. You don't hear any Rexes anymore, but that's a dog's name. My family GP is a Rex. Yeah.

Isn't that crazy? Yeah, yeah, because he's the last one. Rex. Yeah, he's the last one. Rex Hunt. Him and Rex Hunt. He's 400 years old. How good is this?

My GP when I lived in Sydney, his name was Lex. Lex. Yeah. And you trusted him? Well, his name was Lex Bilsen, and it, which is a private eye name. Yes. Not a GP. Not a GP.

But he was very good at asking questions. Lex. Well, Alexi Toliopoulos. Oh, yeah. Very trustworthy. That's true. And I do call him Lex sometimes. This is so confusing.

Anyway, sorry, we keep interrupting you. No, it's beautiful. It's not. Hey, Seran, please do go on. We're going to shut up for a bit. Okay, so this guy who is the, he's like the chef guy in French King Louis the 14th's like court. He becomes renowned for making this great gelato. and serving the frozen delicacy in these royal courts and these big banquets.

And his name's Francesco Procopio. He's a Sicilian chef. And I think part of the reason Louis brings him into the court is because the Sicilians, they've been making this gelato. Right. And gelato is popular in France, but no one's making it quite as well as the Sicilians. So Procopio, in 1684, he opens Paris's oldest cafe, which is called Café Procop. It was the oldest when he opened it. Yeah.

But that also technically is true. Yeah, it's a funny way of saying the first cafe. You mock it. Or it's the oldest still running. It's like the first cafe. First ever cafe. Yeah, first ever cafe in 1684. And it's like for refined gentlemen from the court.

Oh, great. So I could go there. That's fantastic. Oh, but I can't. I love a cafe. You're not refined. You're not refined. You might be a gentleman.

Get farts. I am refined. No, you've just proved it there. What? Yeah. Your tone. Oh, come on. Your tone was not refined.

Guess what would happen there? People would have intellectual conversations. Yes, just like cafes now. Yeah. So it's revolutionary for its time, but it's quite normal now. But he would serve coffee instead of wine. I guess that's what makes it a cafe. Yep, cafe just means coffee.

And also, because he's a gelato guy, he's crowning jewel is gelato. And it's all the elite are cum ring. coming here, people like Voltaire, who runs just a comedy night. Yeah, there's a comedy room in North Melbourne. But yeah, he also, I think we learn about him in a recent Lotto episode. He, I think his whole career, he found a loophole in a lotto and made a fortune, and his whole career was funded by that. Oh my God.

Lotto loophole. Wow. So he's like the, he's like the David Walsh. Yeah, that's true. Gambling system. Beautiful. David was being the, the Mona. The Moner, yeah.

Museum of New Art and Oberg. Oh, I did. I did. I swear. Why are you looking at me like that? I knew. And he keeps finding loopholes, I think. He still just lives off gambling.

Figured out a system. I hope that museum survives him. You know what I mean? Like if it is being funded by this one guy, gambling. What happens afterwards? I'm sure they've thought of that. Yeah. Hopefully. Probably. Although I think it's getting to the point, and this is not part of the report, but where they're like, I don't know, this guy should be, we let this guy pay no tax from his gambling system because he was giving back to the city of Hobart with this museum. But now it's like,

we should probably, we would have made so much more money if we just made him pay tax. So I think they're trying to crack down on, which will be an interesting development for that museum. But also a real opportunity for another state to take him on tax-free. Bring just... Bring mine into Victoria. Uproot this underground museum and bring it. Shouldn't be too hard. Yeah, chucking in docklands.

We got space for it. Yeah. So one thing I should have pointed out, by the way, which I forgot to, but it's kind of obvious, is that it's still, we're in the 1600s, it's still like very difficult to store or obtain ice. Still don't have freezers. So that is, so this guy, Procipio, he's serving. this gelato in his cafe, it's still truly a novelty. And that's why there's, there's like people, yeah, I don't know who Rousseau is, but Voltaire's there, there's like French luminaries

are coming. This is big, it's like a huge part in, um, in French culture in Paris. And, uh, this cafe really popularizes jolato throughout France. The French, I don't think of, I don't connect France with a gelato or ice cream or anything. I think of it as like a realtyty. It's like a really Italian thing, but it sounds like it was instrumental in it in its popularization. Yeah, because of what happens next, which is, again, there's more conjecture about this, but essentially the English would never admit to it because they don't like to claim anything from France. They don't like claiming anything at all from other countries.

No. But King Charles I, it becomes obsessed with ice cream. and it's like where would he have got it from? Yeah. It's just across the channel. It was just, you know, it was what do you call it? Parallel thinking. Yeah.

So that's what the English would claim is. So we just came up with the idea. And because of the history of like, yeah, it makes sense if you put some sort of sweet flavoring with ice, it takes people seem to fucking love it. Yeah. So that's their claim. It's like, yeah, we just came up with this ourselves. That was super linked.

Like a lot of the kings of England. They're all intermarrying. Yeah. And it's like, well, these guys in their royal courts are impressing people with this gelato. Yeah. Well, I want to do that too. I was like, oh, this is interesting. Yeah, I love it.

It's actually very similar to what I've also come up with. Yeah. That's so interesting. Mine's better, obviously, but very similar. Yeah, this is a great start. How do you make this just to see if I make it the same? Yeah, that's how I used to make it. I've developed a little further than that.

I put double the cream. Yeah. It's going to be big. Yeah, how much cream do you put in? Yeah, I'll put double that. I put double that. So that's interesting. Mine's, I guess, better.

But it's okay. Twice is good. But thank you for this. It's so nice. Thank you. That's great. It actually takes me back to when I was starting out. So King Charles is the first.

He's obsessed with it. He starts paying a pension of 500 pounds a year to a guy to be his personal ice cream maker. And part of the 500 pounds, which would have been so much money back, I guess, then, is. add now, but part of it is to make sure that this guy keeps the recipe secret. Because King Charles wants to be the only person who has it. There were banquets, there's records of banquets where King Charles is hosting people, and it's like only the table, I guess it's, to me, I envisaged it a bit like a wedding

scenario where there's a banquet, there's a table at the very front of the banquet, which is all the real royal people. Yeah. And they're the only people eating actual gelato. And the rest of the people are just watching on in, like, Watching them eat gelato. And they have their own little dessert treats, whatever they would have. But the gelato was preserved for that banquet table. He wouldn't let anyone have the recipe.

Again, now you can just get a tub of it and put it in your freezer at home. Yeah. I've just had a look. So Charles, it's from the House of Stuart. So one of my ancestors. And no, he spells it that. It doesn't matter. That's just the French.

That's actually the French influence. But he married Henrietta Maria of France. So he's like, I have no connection. How would I have figured that out? Did France is doing this? Oh, you think I talk to my wife? We have separate wings, okay? She feeds me.

Apart from hello on our wedding day, nothing. Nothing. And maybe at our honeymoon. Yeah. I had a frozen treat. Yeah. Okay, sure, maybe a little taste. Whatever.

What happens on the honeymoon stays on the honeymoon? Yeah. Exactly. Move on. God. That's private. Get it over. Jeez. Gosh.

Gosh. Jeez, let's alone. At this point in time, it would be, there was like a big wooden box that they would like put in the cream and the ice into and then you'd have to sort of hand crank it. Right. To make a. Just like Charles on these honeymoon night. But so it's still very impractical.

Rich people are starting to build ice houses at this time, and they like to store ice, but it's pretty much the common man does not have any means of storing ice still by this time. Jump forward a little bit to the 1800s. As technology allows people to store ice a little bit more economically in their homes, ice cream is like, of course, people are going to start desirons. to have it available in their homes. We're talking to Fisher and Parkle? Before Ben and Jerry could walk, Fish and Parker had to crawl.

And one of the great early comedy duels. Fisher and Pikele and Parkle. I think it was Hall of Oates. Straight men. Yeah. Hall of Oates and Fisher and Bichael. Hall of Oates, yeah. They headlined the very first Melbourne international comedy.

Man, man, man eater is one of the funniest songs. She's a man eater? Yeah. What? Really? Just by herself? That's so funny. It's a whole man.

The whole man. That is really good. Over a few nights or? Make your bump on a few nights. It's a leftovers. Man eater. Man eater. Her eyes bigger than a stomach try and eat the man, including scorn.

Remember when we said we'd shut up for a bit? Didn't we? True. Let's get to the 1800s. Let's jump forward in time to the 1800s. Ice cream is a bit more. readily available. It's still not like something you can easily get at home, but they now have like carts. People like a lot of kind of Italian migrants and stuff have know the recipe.

They can get ice. Like if you're on a commercial scale, you can get access to ice. Again, it would be like people are going to Canada or in Canada, they're harvesting ice. And then they've got the technology enough to keep it cool on ships. They basically put like straw and hay over the ice which helps to absorb some of the heat and stops it from melting. And so then they're shipping ice over to London, places like London and New York. And vendors are getting the ice and using it to make ice cream in basically, yeah, those machines which are like wooden boxes and they're hand cranking the ice cream. Oh my God.

By that time, so mid-1800s, people, yeah, you can buy ice cream on the street. But in a cone? It's not yet in a cone. Oh. Are you going to reveal who came up with a cone? Oh, yeah. And if it was Mr. Whippy? Mr. Whippy, that's a great name for our van.

Oh. Yeah, I don't know where that just popped into my... That's fantastic. I guess it would make the most sense if we whipped the cream. Oh, okay. You know what I mean? No one's doing that, surely. Yeah.

So we'd double whip, double cream. Double whipped, double cream. Double cream. Frozen. and then put it in a cone. Oh, maybe we could make it kind of like look pretty, like it's got like a bit of a twirl to or something. A bit of a twirl.

Yeah. What are we going to make the cones out of? Paper? Wait for it. I'll get to it. So, we're in the mid-1800s. He's good. That is good stuff.

Should we get rid of Dave? Should, uh, yeah. That's something we should do in the future. Yeah, we should think about doing. Yeah, we should start the process of thinking about getting rid of Dave. So, yeah, people, they have these things called penny licks. Have you heard of these? Pennylicks.

I've heard of $2 peeps. Is it similar? I don't know. Yeah, but it's less something you do with your eyes and more with your tongue. And it only costs a penny. I would have thought it'd be more expensive. In for a penny to watch someone pound. Okay.

That's nice. Jeez. Yep, that confirms it. Dave is gone. So Pennylick basically what it is is these people, these vendors on the street, they, we didn't have cones yet. We didn't have easy access to like a disposable cup. So they had a glass, basically a small glass that they would serve the ice cream in. And this is in London and in the States in like the early 19th century.

and what they would do is you would buy for one penny the ice cream, but you would have to return the glass, which is like a thick little glass base in a small glass, and there's a shallow kind of thing with the ice cream on top. And it's a bit of an optical illusion. It looks like more ice cream than it actually is. But you lick it clean. There's not even a spoon situation.

You'll just lick in the ice cream. Fucking hell And then you have to return the glass to the vendor So you stay nearby So you're consuming it there You take two steps away Maintain eye contact

Lick this little glass clean I mean it's basically what we do at a pub You know True Yeah it's true I lick my beers clean Yeah And then return the glass

While making eye contact The bartender So it's a penny lick for you And a peep show for the vendor They get to watch you sort of They're getting paid To peep? The dream.

That's the dream. And what's happening is people are like, some people are walking off with the glasses. Some people, they're dropping them and they're breaking them. So it's much like a glass. But they're hitting each other over the head with them after getting these sugar highs. Something far worse is happening. Okay. And in an incident in 1854, there's like a festival of, in Massachusetts.

Beverly, Massachusetts. Beautiful. And a number of people fall ill after they've eaten some pineapple-flavored ice cream. Okay. And the doctors at the time are blaming this and some other incidents of people eating at these penny licks and getting sick. They think it's because of the like preservatives that they're putting in. Oh, my God. Not everyone licking the same bit of glass.

Yeah. So they think it's because of this butyric ether that they're putting in it to preserve it. And that's, they get that from like rancid butter. They get this compound from rancid butter and they're putting it into the ice cream. There's a butter's already gone rancid. Maybe it will help preserve the ice cream. They're using dyes to color the ice cream and people are thinking that it's like arsenic or whatever that is making them sick.

So. But in the end, it turns out it's just the combination of pineapple and ice cream. Yuck. No good. What is that? Basically, they stop using these additives. but people are still getting sick. They think maybe it's the vanilla.

Maybe we're allergic to vanilla. People are still going to eat there? Humans are allergic to vanilla. We know that to be true. It's funny, like, you watch a period drama and they kind of, like, you do go, fuck, we have, we've come pretty far, haven't we? Like, they're just the things they don't know how to do or they, the people are dying of the most basic things or. It's going to, it'll be the same looking back in 200 years.

Oh, yeah. Assuming that, you know, humanity exists, they're going to be like, can you believe it, that they didn't know how to just... Yeah. They just had to... Teleport. And to cure themselves from the flu, they just had to, like,

punch themselves in the chin. Yeah, they just had to spin around three times at the clockwise. My God, so cute. So silly. People got really sick from the flu back then. They were injecting little flus into their body. It was wild. They could have just spun around.

They should have known. Leachers. It all comes back around. Yeah. because of over-eating. Mm-hmm. And so they're, like, violating the laws of decency and digestion. Oh, okay.

Morality. There's a quote from a doctor, and he says, every fellow takes particular delight in gorging himself and his best girl, not only with ice cream, cake and candy, but with every variety of indigestible substance. Jess, you're my best girl. Thank you. They want a funny phrase. Yeah, it would have been nice if you were sitting next to each other,

and you could have put your finger. You little fingers out. That's 100% when we would have touched hands. You're my best girl. Yeah. And I would have said, you're not my best boy. So it's quite funny, though, that these ice cream, that's like people are panicking at this. Like today, our concerns is, is AI going to be the end of us?

But, you know, in society in the 1800s, they had problems like ice cream over eating. But you're right. But you're right. They think the problem is in the ice cream, but people are still eating it. It's, yeah, you're like, you're happy just to continue to be in the guinea pigs here? Yeah, the problem is the bacteria from multiple other strangers' disgusting mouths. And we have found that the first person each day doesn't get sick, but they get increasingly more sick as the day gets on.

Well, do you think they're washing the glasses ever? Yeah, is this before detergent? I think they're probably giving it a little rins. That's not enough. Yeah. It depends on how hot the water is. Is it really hot? But I reckon what happens is when you go to,

eat the penny lick or you purchase the penny lick you the the person who has ate it before you has nicked off yes because they had to maintain eye contact with the vendor for so long as soon as they're done they're just they're getting straight out of there yeah so you wouldn't they wouldn't not even a trace you don't even you think you're the first person every person thought they were the first one yeah mate you're kidding yourself got real main character syndrome what's that called main character energy main character yeah yeah yeah they got that yeah i reckon Well, I mean, you get into an Uber. Do you think about the person who is sitting in there just before you?

Just farting up a storm just before you? No. You do when you catch one like we did in Sydney. And we lick the walls. No, they remember there were the windows. Oh, yeah, the post-it notes. There was a driver who had different coloured post-note pads and encouraged you to write messages and they were just like all on the inside of the car.

So you couldn't see out of the windows? No. Okay. Yeah, it's not a very pretty place. He asked us to put it on the windshield as well, the front window. No, no. Over his eyes. So, yeah, but you're correct, Jess.

Basically, what's happened is that it is the bacteria of other people licking these licky cups. Because our mouths are gross. So they are, they're disgusting. Mouths are disgusting. Well, you don't have to say ours, yours is, sure. Yours is. Mine is not.

Pristine, yeah, I know, I'm very jealous. I have a disgusting mouth. Oh, yeah, my mouth is. Yours is perfect. You gargle, Benadine, once a 10 minute, every 10 minutes. Yeah, every 10 minutes. Yeah, every 10 minutes. We have to stop recording every 10 minutes, so Matt can't gargle.

Well, the main reason is because I just never know when our queen, Elizabeth II, is going to come visit. That's right. And I need my mouth to be ready for a queen's visit at any moment. That's right. So that's the reason. Any day now, she's going to come. How do you intend to greet the queen? She's going to come in my mouth.

When she comes. I don't know. Open mouth. kiss. Well, as is customary. Isn't it? Yeah. Yeah.

But what you have to do when you greet a queen is close your eyes while you're still quite far away from her and just go. Yeah, yeah. And wait for quite a while and hope that your mouths connect. Yeah. You have to close your eyes early though. It's rude otherwise. Yes.

And then after it, you're not allowed to make some sort of judgment about whether or not it was the queen? No, that would be uncouth. You have to keep your eyes closed until the Royal Highness has left the room. And then you can open your eyes. Yeah. And then every now and then, you got corgied. She's a prankster.

She's a prankster. She's a prankster. She's got, this is a long process. It's quite a cumbersome sort of routine and ritual. Yeah. So sometimes if she has eight people to meet, she'll meet one of them. And the other seven, she'll send in seven corgis. Yeah.

Send in the corgis It's a bit like Russian roulette But it's the British version Yeah You get to Yeah Snog the clean Instead of the one bullet

What, there's seven empty chambers Yeah We're talking an eight shooter You know there's eight shooters Corgi kisses But because of the penny lick People getting poisoned This leads to

What you asked about before, Matt the invention of the cone. Oh, the cone. Oh, the cone. Yes, we're not even up to the fridge yet. Yeah. That's really, so it wasn't, it wasn't, it was invented as a disposable receptacle. Yeah.

Edible receptacle. Which, you might think that the cone came after the cup, but the, the little paper cups that you get when you get you let it. That was after the cone. Yeah, that was actually after the cone. Okay, so the story begins on Wall Street in, in, in. Manhattan. This guy's name is machione. He's another Italian. He's a resident of Hoboken. And he's working... That feels so perfect. Hoboken. Machiaoni? I live in Hoboken.

Well, they, he, he's like a push cart vendor and he's serving ice cream to his fellow New Yorkites. And he, they used to call out the Italian vendors in New York when they were pushing the carts. They used to call out, echo un boko. And, and, they used to call out, Eko unpoch. And so they got the nickname Hokie-Pokey men. A little bit of casual racism there. Oh. I guess, I don't know.

But hokey-pokey, because people couldn't understand what they were saying. So that's where the Hokie-Pokey, that's what the Hokie-Poke is all about. Yeah. And the Eko on Pocco means here's a little. So that's what they were calling out. So here's a little. Hoki-poki is like a weird old dance, but it's also, isn't it a flavor of ice cream? Yeah.

Yeah, so it was the flavor of ice cream first before people were doing the hokey pokey. Is that a common song dance thing? I reckon the song probably came first. That's my guess. But the song is instructing you how to dance. Probably came at the same time. You put your left down in. You did the bump bana.

And you shake it all about you do the honeymoon. According to Google, that song was released in 1993. Okay. That can't be right. I can't be right. But that is around the time that I would have been hearing it. Matt's as old as the wind and he would have heard it as a child. It's been around for a long time.

Oh, sorry, did you say 1993? I thought you said 1993 BC. So this guy, Marchione, he's very important to our story because he's tired. He gets frustrated with people dropping the glass and breaking it and walking off with it. And also, yeah, by this time in London, and it's been banned because of fears of like cholera and whatnot. And so, Machiaoni,

he basically, he spends his nights coming up with the idea of using like pastry as a form or a vessel. And he figures out that if you get a waffle and you roll it up and you shape it into a thing, when it cools, it'll be kind of hard and can hold ice cream. He hasn't yet figured out that it will hold ice cream, but he's been playing around with waffles,

and he's like been playing around with that. Then he starts selling ice cream at the St. Louis World Fair. Man, World Fairs. Have you heard of the Louisiana purchase or something? Yeah. World fairs are how so many big things have started. It's incredible. Like the awful tower was launched at one.

That's true. And all sorts of things. But there is, oh, yes. Is this, is this the story where there was a waffle guy next to it? But that's been debunked, has it? Or that is real? Well, so there is a story. The current is attributed to a guy called Ernest A. Humwee,

who's like a Syrian migrant to the US. And he's at the St. Louis World Fair. And he's selling waffles, basically. It's like a Syrian version of a waffle. It's called a Zalabi, which, It's kind of, if you look at it, it looks like a flat waffle. Yeah. Like a thin, long waffle rather than like the shape that you'd imagine.

But it's pretty much the same thing. It's like got the ridges and it's textually the same. I'm hungry. Yeah. Yum. He's selling them. They're crisp pastries and the booth next to him is an ice cream vendor. And there's cues going out the huazoo for this ice cream.

People are loving it. and he's like unable to basically keep up with the demand because the cues are going so long he's running out of vessels to serve it in. And then this ice cream vendor turns to the waffle man next to him who's El Humwe and asks him if he can have one of the waffles and he rolls it up because he's already been experimenting with the waffles. And he does that.

It sets pretty quickly. and then he scoops in the ice cream to it. And then, so basically they start teaming up. And Humwee, people love, people start buying the waffles, people start putting ice cream in it. And then that's the origins of the ice cream cone. Yum. And that's true?

Well, so. Because I swear I've heard that. And then also someone been like, oh, actually, that is apocryphal or whatever. According to gelatoman.com. Okay. What happened is that, uh, the, The person who was selling the ice cream was never credited in that story. So people talk about St. Louis and the St. Louis World Fair as the origins of the ice cream cone,

but they accredited it to the Waffle Man. And then the daughter of, or like granddaughter, I think, of Marchione, she actually, she was looking into it because she found all these records of her dad that he had, he had like, been experimenting because he was a bit of a technician as well. He was also a bon Talente. It's a good talent. He'd experimented with like different molds to make waffles or pastry cones, basically. And had like, she found little records in his house of sketches of how to like create these molds that you could put it in so you could mass produce cones.

And then she was researching it and she found her that he actually was at the St. Louis World's Fair. So her conjecture is that he was the mystery ice cream man next to. Ernest A. Humwee and because he'd already been playing around with the idea of using pastry to set and have as a cone, that basically you could walk away, you didn't, you could take the ice cream with you. You didn't have to lick it and return the glass. Because he was the one flirting with that idea, she reckons he was the one, the mystery ice cream man that was next to the Syria guy. That would make sense. That would make sense. So they basically came up with it together and then from that people,

word spread that, oh, you can use pastry as a way as a vessel for the ice cream. And so St. Louis, other businessmen in St. Louis got onto it

and then they basically took that idea and patented. Because also this guy, Marchioni, is the first guy to have a patent for ice cream cones.

Right. So it does make sense that he, unless it's another case of parallel thinking, but it kind of makes sense that he was the one who is next to this waffle maker at the St. Louis World Fair.

Yeah, right. And that changed everything. They make everything edible now. Yeah. You can get, sometimes they make spoons, Heston Blumenthal. Yeah. Waffle spoons. Waffle hats.

Yep. You wear a hat for a day. Fairy burnt hats. Yeah, eat your hat. That's where the saying, I'll eat my hat comes from. When someone wants to say that something's unlikely, but it's been changed over the years. Yeah, because now it is more. likely.

Yeah. Because they make waff hats. Yeah. Woffel hats. Um, uh, I'm going to jump ahead now to the 1940s. Whoa.

If that's all right with you. That's fine. So in the 19, by in the, like before the great depression, just for a bit of context, by this stage, ice cream's like becoming very much associated with like,

well-being, not health and well-being, but with like, um, like wealth. Yeah. wealth, but also just like general happiness and mood. So in the prohibition era, it's alcohol gets banned.

And then a lot of those alcohol companies pivot towards making ice cream because they see that the customer base will like, they can't drink alcohol as escapism, but the next best thing is ice cream. And they have like sugar and they have all the, they have access to. Yeah. And they may have access to like bottle making stuff. as well so they would they basically started selling bottles of ice cream but it was like people would then consume ice cream as there that's interesting i've uh i've had a few long stints off of booze

and i did find without thinking about it next time i do it i'll try and keep keep on top of it but i did find that i was eating more chocolate and and treats and stuff instead without thinking about it i was like oh that's weird but that that's probably sort of craving a different kind of escapism or different kinds of treats yeah some sort of just yeah Just to treat yourself when the world's hard. That's actually the flavour of ice cream known as Rocky Road, which was two vendors. They were serving ice cream.

And they just, back then it was still like standard kind of flavors like vanilla or bases, maybe chocolate. There wasn't so much like, yeah, there wasn't so much toppings that you could put on it. But a couple of guys at a stall, they started chopping up nuts and,

marshmallows and putting it into it. And they noticed how much joy it was bringing people. And they were like, hey, this is, you know, life's a bit of a rocky road. Really? So the name comes from like, this is your escape. This is your relief. Man, some of these facts are sounding like maybe AI wrote them for the gelati man. Do you know how?

I wish I got AI to write this report because I had to go to a lot of different gelato website. By the time we get to the 1940s, because. Is ice cream in the States in particular is so tied to like happiness and good times and like a celebration of, yeah, not just wealth but like prosperity as a nation? You know, we can enjoy our ice cream. Who would you say in 1943

is the biggest producer of ice cream? Oh, this is like towards like the end of Second World War. Is it going to be... 43. So before the end of them. Oh yeah. Coming towards the end. Yeah, yeah.

So I'm guessing, is it going to be like Hitler or something? I know, that's what I'm worried about. Because it's like each, I know, someone with Santa was some sort of. Yeah, too. A Nazi recipe or something like that. Yeah. Because they couldn't get Coke or something like that. Yeah.

Or they didn't want an American or something. It's funny. Anytime you hear anything around the time of World War II, like, is it going to be Nazis? Is it going to be Nazis? Is it Nazi, Seren? No. Thank God. You'll be pleased to know.

It's not Nazis. Who is it? It's the United States. forces. Okay. Really? The ballpark. Yeah.

Were they not busy doing other stuff? Well, this is the thing. So around the time... When I say the ballpark, I'm not suggesting that the American armed forces are... They were in cahoots. I'm just meaning, you know, a war thing. A wartime thing. So around the time of World War I, the military had a very sustenance-based approach to food.

And they are providing rations to their soldiers based on calories. This is like you've got a job to do. We're going to give you the best diet to help you do this job. And there's no emphasis on taste or morale. It's all what is available and we'll give you that. There's like shortages as well going on in World War I Depression era where sugar is hard to get your hands on. It's hard to the dairy industry is hit by the Great Depression.

And so they actually, some countries like Britain and even in the US, like ice cream becomes illegal because they reckon they've got to use sugar for more important purposes. Illegal feels a bit far, doesn't it? Yeah. Ice cream's illegal. And now we can just go down to the supermarket.

There's a supermarket across the street. There's a whole aisle. I can go get eight tubs of it. And that's, no one's policing that. No one's policing that. You could go as a two-year-old and buy eight tubs. I can do whatever the fuck I want with those eight tubs too. I could throw them straight in the bin.

I could throw them at cars. Throw them at cops. That's probably illegal. That's probably illegal. That's probably illegal. I've gone too far. But you've found where the line is. You're on a sugar high.

I'm excited. I ate two of the tubs. And now I'm losing my mind a little bit. You're wearing one of the empty tubs on your head. It's not quite empty. It's all over me. I thought this hat would be edible. Basically, what happens by World War II is that the ice cream industry and the medical industry,

they jump into bed together. They're in cahoots. And they start pushing for hospitals to provide ice cream to wound. soldiers because they're like, hey, this is about morale. These guys are representing our nation on the front lines. Now they're hurt. And we want to nurse them back to health, not only physically, but also psychologically. So the medical industry are also like, hey, let's get ice cream in here.

Interesting. That does feel like a bit of a hospital cliche, jelly and ice cream. Is that a thing? Definitely jelly, right? Jelly in a hospital for sure. But growing up, we definitely had jelly and ice cream. Yeah. Hmm

Grandma's house Yeah Frog in the pond Aeroplane jelly I hate it frog I like aeroplane jelly Because it made the It made the frog weird

Yeah it was a weird The bottom half of the frog was weird Yes I like the I like the idea of them Yeah cute fun look But I hate it eating The chocolate

I like the individual elements Agreed But yeah together I'll have them separate Yeah Can I have my frog On the side please Can my frog be hanging out

Next to a pond Yeah Also Now that you've referred to this As a pond I am wondering why it's so red. It was so...

What's been going on at the bottom of this pond? It's a shark bean. Your Nana wasn't doing green jelly for your frog of the pond? Jesus. Or blue, but at least green. Yeah, red.

Was your Nana a Satanist? Nana's going for fucking port wine flavor for frog in a pond. Manna had a good taste. One for me, one for Nana. I like my... Wait, what? And that's me being Nana.

Wine for me, she's sipping the port. And one for Napa. No, but I do like My wine, red, my grapes green, and my jelly port. Okay, I'm writing that down. Okay. So I can bring your favorite jelly to the next dinner party. So on the frog.

Saund's frog. So on frog. Do you know what the English, when they banned because of the sugar shortage, do you know what they replaced ice cream with? Probably fucking a cup of tea or something. Mashed potatoes. Mashed potatoes. Not far off.

Carrots on a stick. Carrots on a stick. It's both the incentive and the punishment in the one. We're using a carrot and a stick. What do you mean? We don't really know if this is a reward or a punishment. Like a toothpick stick? Well, they would, yeah, I guess so.

Or like an ice cream stick. They would put the carrot on a stick so you could pretend you're enjoying the experience. Oh, yeah. It's out in front of you. You're always going towards the carrot. Because carrot's such a difficult thing to eat with your hands. Yeah, if only it came in stick form, well, we've got an idea for you. You can't finish the whole carrot if you've touched some of it.

True. Well, yeah, they're finally whising up. Someone's going to lick. They licked it all the way down to the stick. To a null. You're going to return the stick. But when America enter World War II, because ice cream's so big in the States and so tied to happiness, they take ice cream with them.

The Navy spends a million dollars to convert a barge. This is the 40s, a million dollars in the 40s. They convert a barge. into an ice cream factory. And then they start towing it around the Pacific ocean and delivering ice cream to the different battleships. Oh. And it's like, this is, yeah, you know.

That's the first Mr. Whippy, which is our idea. Yeah, but they're probably playing the song in Morse code. Yeah, yeah. I don't know why they're saying like that. It's just to go out of my phone and go, Ah, do, do, do, do, do, dash, dash, dash, dash, dash, dash, dash, dash. Dash dash.

Oh, da-th-thes. Um, yeah, uh, what do we go? Uh, that's-thes. Uh, pot-bo-da-d-d-d-d-des-d-thes. Why is it Guido Hats is? Uh-da-od-thud. It's fun the conno fruderer. This is, this is my great, uh, this is my Swiss-Italian.

Oh, yes, heritage. Yeah. Coming out. That's how they talk. Is that comic? comical to you, Serene? Because that's actually very close to starting a race war.

Dash, dash, dot dot dot dot dot dot. You can't do it. Surin, you can't do it. You don't know who I'm doing it. I'm doing my Nana. Oh. And that's her doing Morse code for the Pons Red. Oh, okay. Okay, the army constructed basically mini ice cream factories on the front lines as well.

So the Navy, they're all getting in on it. The Navy, the Army, the Navy's doing the battleships that are, uh, converted to ice cream factories. The army are making their own little on front lines. They're getting cartons of ice cream and they're delivering them to soldiers who are in their foxholes. Because it's like you're sacrificing, you know, putting your life on the line for the country, we're going to give you ice cream.

The Navy even had one ship called the USS Lexington that was like full of ice cream in the freezers. They had all this ice cream in the freezers and when it got struck by a Japanese torpedo, it's like the torpedo hit the USS Lexington. It doesn't just explode like in the movies. It's sort of like slowly sinking. And the procedure, the sailors all knew what the procedure was to abandon the ship. But before they did, they went into the freezers and they took all the ice cream and then they jumped into the. That's. that to sew on airplanes now, please leave your bags behind? Yeah.

Because people used to grab all their ice cream. Yeah, yeah. And in the overhead compartment, it probably stays quite cool. Yeah. But it's funny that you said that because we moved to the next thing, which is that the Air Force, they didn't want to be left out. The Navy's doing it. The Army's doing it.

The Air Force, they figured out that if you've ever made ice cream at home, you would know now that it churning is how you get that kind of soft texture. Otherwise, it's just really icy and too hard. Yeah, like a cool thing. Indian Culfee is like dense when you bite it into it. They haven't churned it. You know, you know the phrase like my stomach is churning? Mm-hmm.

And that's what the, that's what invented ice cream. Yeah, the horse's stomachs. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Whoa. I thought it was the clop-clop, but it didn't have anything to. It doesn't matter if they're two left feet, those horses. Yeah. Their stomachs are churning.

Wow. Wow. But you have to make the horse anxious. Yes. You tell them they've got a big gig. coming out. You've got a really big year. You can make or break your career horse.

Yeah. But it will give us great ice cream. So basically what the Air Force figured out was they would take like punnets of cream and they would they would like basically take it up in the fighters or the bombers and they would fly at heights that were like so cold temperate. and with the kind of movement of the plane, it would churn the ice cream in... What? Yeah.

At the altitude. Yeah. But, I mean, they had to fly anyway. Yes, right. But it did mean the bombers didn't have bombs in it. It just had ice cream. Yeah, and they would... Yeah.

Like, Hiroshima is quite controversial, but there's probably a town out there where they just dropped... Ice cream. Rocky Road. That's not on gelatamend. Okay. I should say. That's a seren fact.

But yeah, they would, so they would attach the tub to the rear gunner's compartment and it would stay cold at those high altitudes, but also the vibrations of their machine gun fire would help to churn. What? The ice cream. That's insane. What a funny thing. We're killing people.

While making ice cream. Well, this is, and that's crazy because this is how much ice cream was tied to American kind of. hubris and American pride. There are Bugs Bunny cartoons, which you can find if you Google it. It's quite incredible. But there's like Bugs Bunny.

They would, you know, American pop culture and propaganda stuff? They would use like different characters. So there are Bugs Bunny cartoons from the era, from the like the 40s where he goes to the, he's like a soldier and he goes to Japan and he's like, he's driving an ice cream truck and

delivering ice cream, playing the music and all these Japanese, they call them offensive words, which we would now deem inappropriate to use. So I won't use it. But they're Japanese people. Can't say anything anymore. Hear the music and it's like, dot dot dash dash, dot, dash. And they come and he's like, ice cream, get your ice cream. And they take it and then it turns out that they're grenades.

And they blow up. But it's like, that's, ice cream's part of the whole war effort. It's so... That's so interesting. Yeah. Because it's, yeah, I think... I imagine they were quite sensitively drawn those Japanese characters as well. I can imagine so, yes.

I think because I think so little about ice cream day to day, and it's so readily available that this seems insane. Yeah. To go to this effort so that soldiers can have ice cream. Yeah, because I guess I don't know what kind of comforts they. try to give soldiers today. But probably if you're on the front line and someone brought a punnet of ice cream to you

and you're in a foxhole, you'd be like, I could just go down to the colds. Yeah, 7-11. Yeah. I can get like one on a stick. Now what the fuck am I supposed to do with this whole tub of it? I don't know.

I reckon even now if someone goes out, I've got a special treat. He's a little tub of ice cream. I'm never craving it. Yeah. But I think it would be like, oh, that's nice. Yeah. As far as in a foxhole.

And so I don't think you can always just duck down a 7-11 when you're in a foxhole. No, I don't know. But yeah, it's just funny that the efforts they're going to for something that is now, through a modern lens, so accessible. Yes. But similar to that story I told a few years ago about that guy took beers. Yeah.

To his mates fighting in Vietnam. Yep. That's a great story. And that, like, it was for them, they was like, oh my God, American beer. Yeah. It was a real thrill. So I guess it would feel. You know, I go overseas and I'm like, I would kill for an Australian.

in coffee. Right. Tim Tam. Oh my God. Tim Tam slime. Because they don't do coffee overseas, do they? They don't. And I don't know why we haven't like shared it yet, you know?

That should be our number one export. Because we're so good at it. Italian Australians are so good as well. Why don't we give it back to Italy? Say, hey. That's smart. Here's something that you gave to us. Thank you.

Yeah. Thank you for the ice cream. Here's the coffee. Yeah. You should try it. Give it a go. Wow. And it, yeah, we call it like cafe latte.

Yeah. Um, that you probably won't get, it sort of, it kind of means a coffee with milk. Yes. Yeah. To put it in a simple term. Something you would understand. Yeah. English.

To translate your language back to you. Yes. It's a coffee with milk. So I want to bring you to the end of the history of ice group, which is that, um, uh, after, um, a very successful tour of Dry Dreyer, Dreyer, um, a show that Matt and I performed at the comedy festivals around Australia. very close to the Brisbane Powerhouse where our last show was. It was a great gelatoria.

And Matt and I, Stuart and me, Saranjana, enjoyed a little celebratory ice cream after our show. Yeah. It's nice. I'm like, I'd just sort of talk you into it because I was sort of 10 minutes walk past where we were pretty ready to go to bed. Serran was drinking beers, which he took from the bar, we were out, he's drinking him on the street, like he's being a bad boy.

Yeah. But it felt like a, you know, you have to let off steam and up to drink. I felt dangerous. I'm like, I don't know if I want to be hanging out with this bad boy of comedy. Yeah, because sure, it starts with going to get ice cream and it ends at 4 a.m. Yeah, exactly. You know, that's going out with Surin. Yeah.

No, but I'll tell you where it ended. It ended with just a beautiful moment between friends. I was very close. I had a cone and you had a cup. Okay. Yes. And you, yeah, you were, you were shocked by that. Yeah, I think a real celebration deserves a cone.

Right. You're going to let loose. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then the problem was then we were walking back to our house and stumble across two people who'd been at the show. Oh. And they stopped and they said, that was great.

I really enjoyed the show. That's very funny. That's nice. We just picked you on a whim. Oh, that's lovely. We weren't even fans. And then as I was talking to them, I sort of tilted my ice cream and the scoop fell onto the ground. with the biggest plop.

I forgot about that. Oh my God. And I think I heard the sound. Yeah. And so that is where the history of ice cream ends. Yeah, ice cream's done. On the floor in Brisbane. What flavor?

I went with a stretch of teller. Okay, Matt. Because I wasn't going to have it. Yeah. All the way up to the front. And I said, I should. I should have something. And then I turned around.

There was a line for me. I'm like, shit. So you panicked. I said, just give me two scoops. so you'd recommend. Oh, boy, that was a mistake, wasn't it? One of them was good. I like chocolate and the other one was very sweet.

It was a, it was salted caramel. Oh, I do like a salt caramel. It was super popular, but it was just too sweet for me. Yeah. I would have probably preferred an even more chocolatey one. That's too risky. I think you would have preferred a carrot on a stick. Yes.

Delicious. Oh, Serend, what a great report. Is that the end of it? Yeah, is it? That's great. I didn't know any of it. Like, what an interesting story. And again,

Just something I don't think about because ice cream's just always been there. And there's so many, I mean, yeah, I'm like, how are you going to talk about this for long? And we didn't even get into, like, the origins of all sorts of different flavors. Like, where did mint chock chip come from? Some people are disgusted by the idea of dairy and mint being mixed together so they can't get their head around it. I fucking love it. But I love it. It's probably, it's one of my favorites.

I can tell you that. It was a culinary student in South Devon College in England. She entered a competition to make an ice cream dessert for Prince Anne's wedding. When was that? That's not that long. Yeah, 1973. What? Really?

She entered with mint chopped chick. Chip chop. Chop. Well, the horses just wandered in. Chip, chop. She gave it a much easier to pronounce name, which was mint royale. Oh. That's fancy.

I like mint chop. Chip. She got a silver cup for her efforts. Yum. But it's like one of the, it's probably one of the top flavors I fucking love it. It's my favourite. I love mint and chocolate together. Yeah, it's beautiful.

I was a kid, my two scoops would have been mint chock chip and boise and berry swirl. Oh, yum. Mine would have been mint chock chip and rainbow. Oh, yeah. If I, if I took, I probably took you to like when I was 12, but when I was eight, Rainbow big time. I remember the first time having Boisenberry at an auntie's place. Very adult.

Holy shit. Ice cream can be so sophisticated. Afterwards, I smoked a cigar. I had poison berry the other day when we went to see Planet of the Apes. Oh, yeah, that's a great chock top option. It is good. I don't know. Is it a berry?

It's not a natural berry. It's multiple berries that have been. It's like a human-made berry. And it was, I think, an American invention on this theme park. And is it just a fun joke that it rhymes with poison? Is it? You know what? A lot of berries would be poisonous.

Yes. It came up on, oh no, I'm going off Wikipedia.org. The exact origin of the Boisenberry are unclear, but the most definite records trace the plant, as it is known, back to grower Rudolph Boisen, who obtained the Jubary Loganberry patent from the farm of John Lubbin. And then in the late 1920s, George M. Darrow of the USDA began tracking down reports of a large reddish purple berry that are being grown. on Boysen's farm in Anaheim, California, and he enlisted the help of Walter Knott, and that knot guy went on, I think, is where Notts something farm is,

which is like a, maybe like a fun park or something. Nottsbury Farm, yeah. Yeah, anyway, that's a bit boring. I do also find the hokey-pokey. Apparently, it's called hokey-pokey in the US and Canada, but in the UK island in some parts of Australia, the hokey-coki-coki. Oh, I've never heard of that either.

It originates back as a British folk dance, and it seems to go back at least to the 1800s. Wow. It was recorded in Robert Chambers' popular rhymes of Scotland from 1842, with the words given as Falderallah, Falderalla, hinkum booby roundabout, right hands in and left hands out. Hink and boobooby roundabout. Why is it all made up words? until left hand in right hand. Maybe I mean, all words are made up if you think about it.

It's like listening to another language where they sometimes will have borrowed words from English. Yeah. But they might as... That could be a real word in Scots, maybe. True. All words are really just made up sounds. Wow, that's a really good point. That is a really good point, actually, yeah.

Thanks. But yeah, there's a bunch of different ones. Can you dance, lube, lube, can you dance lube, lubey, can you dance lubey, loobie? your dad's looby-loobie all on a Friday night, you put your bright hand in and then we take it out. Wow. That bit seems pretty consistent. That was from 1892.

Anyway, you want me to do all of that on a Friday night? That's too much. All those looby-lobys? At the end of a work week? I want to crash. But yeah, that was a pleasure to take you to the history of ice cream.

It was delightful. It was delightful. Just quickly, sir, and what is your favourite ice cream? It is the stretch of teller, which I was having that night in Brisbane. What is that? I've never heard of that. I can tell you the very,

quickly the history of that as well, because it is quite interesting. Stratatella is a soup from Rome, which is like a meaty broth with egg that's stirred into it so that when you stir the egg in, it sort of sets in the stirring motion. This is your favourite ice cream. So it's like kind of stringy. No, but I didn't know that. Well, I was always curious why it has that name. I thought that maybe Stratatella was like a cheese because it's quite a milky flavour of ice cream.

But the defining characteristic of the Stratatela is. the like little chocolate, dark chocolate kind of shreds that are in it. Oh, that sounds awesome. Yeah. So that's how it got its name because this, when he was, a guy was making Fiora di Late, his name's Enrico Panatoni. Isn't that a, that's the thing. Which is another, yeah.

It's too many different references to, yeah. It's like that bready kind of cake you get at Christmas. But he, um, just on a whim as an experiment, he squirted in some dark chocolate pieces while he was like whipping the Fiori de Late and then in the churn those pieces got shredded. Oh, that sounds so good. Because it was sort of similar to the motion of like whipping in egg to the meaty broth, he's called it a stretcher teller. Interesting.

Is the vanilla the base ice cream? Fiora de Late is like, it's milky. Yeah, it's sort of like sweetened milk. That sounds really nice. I love the, yeah, I like the flakes of chocolate through. You know, like a Vionetta cake. Or there was briefly this ice cream, you know, on a stick. That was a carrot, man.

And it was called the wave or something, and it was in this wave shape, but it was like that. It was vanilla. Yum. And just these thin flakes of chocolate throughout it was just the best texture. You can get, have you seen like the vionters on a stick? No. You can have basically a single serve vionetta on a stick. Yeah.

Yeah, I certainly fed out about that recently. It is? It is. Yeah. Oh my God, I want Vianetta now. Isn't it so amazing? Well, I think we answer the question, will you feel like I'll screw at the end of the episode? I really do.

And waffles. Can I remind you about the whale vomit? I'd rather you do. Okay. Thank you. Hey, Saran, thanks. We're, uh, Jess and I, maybe Dave, if we can find him. Uh, we'll do.

He is fine. So we will find him. And, um, you can't spell find without fine. You're going too far now. Yeah. It's sounding suss. Oh, okay. Just be cool.

Yeah, okay. Yeah, so thanks so much for joining us, Seren. My pleasure. Any thing you can point people towards before you head off, you know, the sunset? Yeah, if you're in Melbourne on the 3rd of August, I'll be appearing at the live Who Knew it with Matt Stewart. Has Matt invited you or have you just announced that as a way to get yourself on?

Fuck yeah. Love that for you. No, I've been invited you. And also, yeah, if you haven't watched it already, and you're in an international jurisdiction, which I think we all are. The ABC International. I don't know the full details of it,

but it might be available to track down Good Tucker. Yes, it's been picked up by ABC International recently. I don't know where that broadcast. But maybe you can find it online, therefore, or with a VPN, you can get it on the, SPS on demand. And it's a fun show. Matt's in it.

It's a documentary. Matt's playing himself. Playing it. I'm playing it. The character's name's Matt, but it's not me. No. Yeah.

It's a blow hard, no nothing, no at all. Yeah. That's not me. That's not me. That's not me. That's not me.

That's not my Matt Stewart. No. But yeah, that's great. And then otherwise I'm on Serene comedy on Instagram. So good. Thanks so much for coming in telling us that story. No worries.

We, I'm really keen on hearing. Can I make a request? History of spice. Yeah, because there was a whole like spice wars and something. Yeah. I'm pretty sure New York City was exchanged, or sorry, Manhattan Island was exchanged for some spice. Pepper or something? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. It's insane. It's wild, yeah. But yeah, I think there's heaps to it and it's really interesting. But I only know little fragments. I'd love to hear the whole story. All right.

So get writing. So get writing. You got it? Hey, I'll tell you what. I'll do it next time, David. He's fine. Goes missing. Next time Dave is fine.

Yes. Okay. Oh my God. With the back of Serene, we also get the front of Dave. Dave, welcome back. We settled all along was fine. We didn't even have to wait until the end of the episode to find out. I was sleeping under the table.

Enjoy your little kip? It was lovely under that. Did you actually hear any of the episode at all? Yeah, something, something, something ice cream, something, something, whale vomit, something. Yeah, perfect, yeah, to date. So you remember the two things I told you. a few minutes ago. When I said, oh, it wasn't an interesting story.

You said, it was an interesting story. Right, because I think, what was it? Pistee was the interesting history of the ice cream. Yeah, oh, yeah. It was interesting. It was interesting. I can't wait to listen back because I love ice cream. Oh, yeah, yeah.

And I'm going to listen whilst eating ice cream. And I asked the question at the start, I was like, by the end of this, am I going to be craving ice cream or am I going to be? Good question. Totally off it. And by the end, I was craving ice cream. Let me tell you. We should say that there's, what has there been, about three or four weeks have gone past between what you just heard and this.

Yes. I have not stopped eating ice cream the whole time. Oh my gosh. Dave rang the bell in the thing we buried him in. We had to go and dig him out. It's been a whole pullover. He's a real diva, he's a real diva. It was hot in there.

We got him back now. And, yeah, so ice cream. Ooh, yeah. It was good, though. Ice cream. Ooh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It was a good episode.

I love the work of Surin. And you mentioned of ice cream cake? I love ice cream cake. No. I mean, this is the thing. There's so much room for further ice cream episodes. Yeah, yeah. But I'm just remembering now that I did request that next time Serene comes in, he does

the spice trade. And that whole, you know, it's such a wild story that I don't know bits and pieces of, including that I think Manhattan was traded for access to spice. I think that's why America got it off the Dutch. Wow. Or something like crazy. It's a lot of wild stuff like that.

We even need some nutmeg. Can we? Can we have Manhattan? Is that good? Is that right? And they're like, oh, okay. Fine, fine.

Just nutmeg. Such a shit spice. What a shit deal, too. Like, now they're in the, now Manhattan's full of supermarket aisles, full of spices. Yeah, you can get any. I reckon you could get any spice in New York.

It's just easy. Easy. What a different time it must have been. I challenge you. Okay. In New York City, yes. Find one of every spice.

Okay. Now that that's been challenged on a podcast, is my entire six-week US trip tax deductible? Only if you come back with one of every spice. Okay. Fantastic. Which customs will love. I'll say,

no, no, no, it's for a bit. That's true. I'm committing to a bit. Fair enough. Okay, we love commitment here. All right.

So, we're into the, everyone's favorite section of the show. Dave, where were you, by the way, just quickly? I was in Bali. Wow.

Genuinely in Bali. Must be nice. Buried underground though Yes ringing the bell Ring in the bell Let me out But the bell

Just meant they kept bringing You drinks Yeah It was actually lovely Another Mahito And when he says Underground he means like In a pool

Like it's been dug in Dube yeah It's filled with water In ground pools Bloody hell You were living it up Not that above ground shit Whoa

What were you there for I don't even know A wedding Just a holiday Just a holiday It's a bit of a wedding The time I went there It was for my cousin's wedding

That's lovely No no it was just A little family getaway It was very, very nice. So good. Four years in the making. Yeah. It was something that we'd booked it, paid up front for a discount at this hotel in February 2020.

And you didn't realize you'd booked it on the 29th of February. And you had to wait. I had to wait for the leave you. I had to wait for those bloody borders to reopen. And then the hotel closed down and then they reopened. And I emailed say, any chance of a credit. And they said, you can have the whole thing. Come on over.

So good. It was like, it felt like a free holiday. Yeah. So I was booked in well before you were. Married. Yeah. Was your wife always involved? Yeah, yeah.

Both of us were going to go. And then we ended up going married and we went with the baby. It also said, by the way, we're going to bring our baby too. So we've got a free baby as well. Oh, my God. You didn't have to pay for that baby. Free baby. Yeah, exactly.

This has worked out really well. Holy shit. Free cot and everything. Oh, my God. If you'd put all that money in like some sort of an investment four years ago, there's no way that you would have earned a baby in that time. No way. There's no way.

They take 10 years, minimum. Heaps. Minimum. Yes, in a very high interest, high fees. Exactly. Account. Wow. You've done very well.

You've played the system very well, my friend. I have foresight. So welcome home, Dave. Thank you. Great to be back. What a beautiful tan you've come back with. You're glowing. You're glowing.

It's sort of summary weather there. Yeah. It's always tropicaly. Yeah. Sort of bit humid, but warm. People don't know where Bali is. It's an island in Indonesia. Indonesia.

That's right. But, But a five to six hour flight away from us in Melbourne. Yeah, it's pretty, it's nice and close. That's why it's so popular. Yeah, it's almost like the, it's like a stereotypical Australian getaway. Yeah, that's right, yeah. Because it's fairly cheap, fairly close.

And especially during our winters, it's much nicer weather. Oh, yeah. It's a place that Australia has ruined with our tourism. That's right. I went there for the culture. Okay. Although I just heard the other day that Japan has now taken over for the number one spot that Ozies go to.

So we're ruining Japan now too. So that's pretty cool, isn't it? We're a cancer. Yeah, we are the worst. But that did instantly make me think, I'd love to go to Japan. Oh, if everyone's going. So this part of the show, Dave, if you don't remember, from your one week away, is where we like to thank some of our great supporters.

These people are supporting us at patreon.com slash two-go-mpod. If listeners want to get involved, they can go there and do that now. There's a bunch of different levels. Jess, you want to remind Dave of what some of those levels are? Absolutely. And I remember them. So you can get all sorts of rewards like three bonus episodes a month, soon to be four. Yes.

Can we say that? Get discounts on live tickets? Yes. Like, for instance, our Sydney show coming up, they were the first to hear about that and they got discounted tickets. I think they still, if you signed up, you'd still maybe be able to get a discount. Same with the Melbourne Who New It show and the Melbourne do go on the quiz, which maybe is this week. Yes. Yeah.

It's this week. Yep. Yeah, this weekend. Oh my goodness. You get to vote on topics. You get early access to everything. We tell the patrons first. And a fairly new feature.

Add free listening. Oh, that's right. All the new episodes we put out. If you don't want to have ads in the middle at the start, right the end, sign up on Patreon. Yep. And this month, probably coming up later this month, we're going to start doing our fourth bonus episode. That's right. We've already recorded it.

And it's in the editing process. Can't wait. to release those. Really exciting. So one of the other things, if you're in the Sydney-Shaunberg level or above, you get to be involved in this section of the show called Fact Quote a Question, which has a little jingle go, something like this. Fact Quote or Question.

She always remembers the Jing. He always remembers the ding and beautifully harmonised there. Thank you. So if you want to be on the Sydney-Shanberg level, do it. Then once you are, I dare you. Oh, my God, do it. to give us a factor quote or a question or a bragger or a suggestion. Or really, whatever you like, you'll forget to give yourself a title.

The first one this week, I read out four each week. I don't read them out until I read them out. The first one comes from Sam Cutler. Okay, Sam Spamelot the Fourth. And Sam Spamelot the Fourth has a wrap. I don't think we've had a rap before, have we? Hell, yeah. Does that mean I have to wrap it or I can just read it, right?

I think you have to wrap it. See if Sam explains at the start. Yeah, okay, great. Sam writes, oh, hey, my third. three favorites E! I've been wanting to do this for a while and now with Dave's report of the

East Coast West Coast hip-hop rivalry, I have an excuse. Rap go on. Yes. Please read your respective bits. Oh. E-he-he-he. So much excite.

Oh my God. Okay. That sounds ridiculous being read by a 100-year-old man. Sorry, 400-year-old man. So Sam has written us each other. I'll send you the link over here. I'll open. Now I'm opening. Here you go.

There you go. Got that. Don't know. I'm linking you to it now with the Wi-Fi. Are you in the mainframe there? Oh my God. Which one do I click on this again? It's a fact-quoted question.

Response two. Oh, perfect. Number one there. Right. Fantastic. All right. So here's mine first. And it says, please read your respective bits.

So much excited. It says read, don't rap. Yo, my name is Matt. And my words are flowing. I speak so original You can't predict where I'm going Oh wow My voice gives your brain

A fresh coat of paint I got two great friends And I like the saints Hello Hello everybody My name is Jess I got a few things To get off my chest

You better keep their digits Around the right number Or I'll knock you out And into a slumber Snore You'll be the one wishing you were never born Because my laugh

Is gonna cause a flippin' storm Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Now hold the mic for Davis here. I keep them on track even when I disappear. I'm fine, I'm fine. I'm a legendary cobra. And while I was away, I duplicated and cloned you. Oh, that's good stuff.

Yeah, especially like Lesgendary. He said it wrong. All right, so. Did I say lessons? But it's also, it's good that you were like, I'm fine, even when I've disappeared. And that was this episode again. So that's good stuff. Amazing stuff.

Amazing stuff. That's great stuff, Sam. And I think we did it justice. I think we got better and better no offense. Like, I think you were like, fine. And then I was like pretty good. And then Dave was very good. I was like full Capadonna.

Do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You were Capadonna. I was the best Wu-Tang member. You see, he's your favorite. I love Capaddonical, isn't it? Absolutely. Capodonical.

Yeah, that's great. Thank you so much. Sam. Next one comes from Patrick J. Early, aka potato, couch division. An important division. And we thank you for your work. Patrick's offering us a joke.

What a mixed bag you got today. A lot of fun. Hey team, here's a joke I came up with recently. Oh, original joke. Here we go. This is exciting. If it's really good, we edit this out and I take it to the stage as my own. Correct.

Open your show with it. So I guess Patrick, what we're saying is if this is left in, it was a shit joke. Proceed. I want you to commit to opening your 2025 comedy festival show. with this joke. All right, whatever it is. This is your own.

Oh, God. Please welcome to the stage. Matt Stewart. Um, what's the difference? And I start with album. That's, that's my classic being. Squinting at a screen.

Hey, everybody, thanks so much for coming out. What a pleasure to be here. Hey, just had a thought, what's the difference between overthrowing the government for a couple of days and a small vehicle?

One's a two-day coupé tar and the other's a two-day coupe car. Yes. That's the difference between the two. That's incredible. That is good. What's that your first 10 minutes covered? Because there's so much applause.

Or then, well, what I do is then I go back and sort of unpack it. Yeah. Because there's a lot to unpack there. That's funny. Been some absolutely cracking episodes lately. Thanks for all the great work. Have a lovely day. We have been on a hot streak.

You're right. You have yourself a lovely day, Patrick J. early. Yeah. And I think it's so fun to have gone crime, crime, crime. Ice cream. Yeah. It's nice. Break it up. Thank you so much, Patrick. That's a fantastic joke.

We'll leave it in, but I want to see you on stage performing that sometime soon. Next one comes from Michaela McRae, okay, the C-word. Macaela, what a legend. I was having a drink with me and Serena. Macaela had a drink up in Sydney earlier in the year with when we did the Patreon meetup. It's a great time. That's very nice. Because at one point did we have a thing where you could order any colour merch and print it on?

I think might be the only one who had a bright orange hoodie. Oh, yeah, yeah. That was from spring. That's great. I've never seen one in the wild in that colour. I'd love to see that, hopefully in Sydney. I believe, yeah, I believe. McCallela, okay, the C-word has a fact.

So I've got to wrap, a joke and now a fact. Oh, my God. The founder of the Bird's Eye brand of Frozen Foods was named Clarence Bird's Eye. I found out after my family got that wrong in a round of pub trivia. I'd been listening to my fact quote or question. mentioning the name Clarence that day, and I can't believe the coincidence. Wow. Clarence, of course, is what my uncle uses, to mean, probably bleeped that out, AJ.

But people know what the bleep means. It means cunt. He's done it again. Clarence birds on. That would really test if AJ listens to the Patreon section. Yes, let us know if that isn't bleep. And we'll f*** our editor out of a cannon. just to wake him up a bit.

I think he'd like it. I think he'd love it. I think he'd go, wee! Clarence, Clarence Hunt, that was where it came from. It was like a violinist or someone I forget. But yeah, so that's just funny coincidence. Oh, and thanks to Matt and Serent for chatting after Dry Dry and Sydney. I had so much fun.

Hey, we had so much fun. I'm speaking for both of us. Oh, appropriately on Serend's episode today as well. That's beautiful. A lot of things just really lining up. Beautiful, the synergy. Thanks so much, Michaela. and the last one comes from Piper Gallagher.

Galaher. I think I'd sometimes say Gallagher, but there's no Gere there. Piper Galaher. Okay, fourth reserve big red button pusher. No one knows what it does, but someone's got to do it. Important job.

Important job. And just to keep the variety up, we've had a rap joke fact. Now we've got a suggestion. Oh! And the suggestion goes like this. This one is a song recommendation. I'm not very creative or interesting.

but I love to participate. Oh my God, I feel so... Seen. Seen. And heard. And described. Not very interesting. Very, I'm being dull even as I talk about it.

I think you're very interesting, Matt. Oh, my God, stop it. A little too interesting. I think you're a bit dull, but Matt, very interesting. Oh, come on. Piper writes, I have strong feelings about it. So, strap in Buccaroos. Okay, great.

Fast Romantics are a little indie band from Canada that I've loved since I heard them in 2016. Their 2017 sophomore album, American Love, is a beautiful John Hughesian soundtrack that satirizes American jingoism while delivering a fun 80s rock sound and keeping a hopeful and nostalgic tone. That sounds cool. If I were to recommend one track, and I am, it'd be the second track, Why We Fight, a gorgeous anthem about being broken, feeling helpless, but choosing to make the best of the good and the best of the good and the best. bad that surround you to love and be happy in the life you have. A small lyrical excerpt, if you please, Matt, I do please. Here we go. Oh, come on, darling. I'll, I'll have a stab of the melody. Fast romantic. I've got the song ready to go whenever you're finished with the lyrics. Okay. Oh, come on darling. There's a war on our TV, but it's all right. In our bedrooms, we are free.

Deep in the guts of me, I love you violently until dawn's early line. Yeah, so I think it will probably go to something like that. That was really nice. Here's what it actually sounds like. Same. Wow, it's uncanny. It does sound like the boss. Probably can't play much anyway, so that'll do.

Just remember this is on an actual episode, so I probably can't play much of the audio. We will get flagged on YouTube. We all get flagged on YouTube. I forgot that too. But I do like the sound of that already, just from those few bars. Yeah, I enjoyed that too. That sounded really cool. Yeah, Piper finishes by saying,

I'd love to see this band get more support that they greatly deserve. I think they're massively underappreciated. Keep up the great pods and remember, oh shit, I forgot. Must not have been important. That's good stuff from Piper. That is good stuff. Thank you so much, Piper, Michaela, Patrick and Sam. The next thing we like to do, I'm going to listen to that album later.

Unless I forget, which I almost definitely will. The next thing we like to do is thank you for other great Patreon supporters. Just you normally come up with a game based on the topic? Well, I mean, we talk about ice cream. It only feels right to make it types of ice cream. Oh, yeah, flavors. Flavors? Do you want to go like real flavors or do you want to just their order, whatever it is?

It could be either. Dave, this is something that Surin and I learnt when we're on tour. We're separated by a great divide. And that divide is cup or cone. Are you a cup or a cone? Absolutely. Cone. Yeah, I thought you might be a cone.

Oh, okay. Oh, yeah, what do you reckon? I reckon Jess is a cup and Matt is a cone. Ah, no, exact opposite. Really? You're a cup? You're a cup? Okay, so that's what you think of cups.

You're a cup and you thought it was me that was the cup. You're a cup? Hello, over here. I would like to know why I was a cup. Undercover cup. No, I'm just surprised. I'm not a cup, or he's a cup. That he's a cup. Yeah, I agree. It's surprising.

I'm not a huge sweet tooth. So as a kid, I love waffle cones. I love the cones. Yeah. But now I just want to focus on the ice cream. On the main event. I normally go for like a chocolate or a, you know. He's a basic bitch. And that's okay. But then I also don't mind the, like a cornetto occasionally. But I would say I have an ice cream maybe once every couple of years or something. Yeah, I don't eat, I don't like buy an ice cream out all that often. I used to be a cup. person because then you eat it with a little spoon. It was a bit neater. But I have gone back to

cones more now. I think I, to be honest, I did dabble with a cut for a while, but now I'm back on cones. Because I like the, I like to eat the cone. It's funny to say, yeah, I like cones. I punch them on the one. Punch some cones. Um, well, and what's Sarenne, obviously. Saren's a cone man. So I'm really outnumbered. No, no, no. There's no wrong way to eat ice cream. It's like putting it in your butt. I'm just happy to hear that you're eating ice cream because honestly, what a privilege. Yeah. What a beautiful way to live. What of my great ice cream eating experiences was when we were watching Stevenson, who invited us when we're in England the first time to go see...

Hamilton, yes, and we got little ice creams. And we got little haggendars ice creams. That's right. Oh, yeah. That was a lovely night. That was cool. It was like our last night on the tour. Yeah.

What a great way to finish it up. We went out for dinner and then we went to Hamilton and that was like end of tour. Yeah. Have you kept up with Stevenson? Yeah. He took us out to dinner or... He met us out for me. Met us out.

I follow him on... In my mind, I'm bringing it. He picked us up in a limo. He took us out to dinner. No, he met us briefly at dinner. But lovely of him to have us out. And I haven't spoken to him in quite a few years, but I do follow him on Instagram as well. Very successful, often acting in different productions.

He's killing it. That's awesome. Touring around the UK, etc. And dinner, he like DM'd you or something when we're on two. He's like, hey, listen to your podcast. Dave, I'm in Hamilton if you want to come and watch it. No, I was a bit cheekier than that, to be honest. He had tweeted or DM'd me about looking forward to seeing our show or something.

And then I saw in his profile that he was part of Hamilton's guys. I was like, oh, we hope to see you at your show. We'll be entering the ballot because at the time it was like the, and still I imagine it's very difficult to get tickets. There's a ballot every day where like 6,000 people enter for four tickets or something. And he said, I'll DM you. And then I was like, it's happening. Dave. Stevenson, are you still listening?

We think you're a legend. Can you get me tickets? Yeah, we're coming back. Okay, so I'll read out the names. Dave, you go a cup of cone or what vestibule it's in and Jessica comes up with the... Fuck yeah. With the kind of ice cream. Okay, but is there more options than a cup or cone?

Well, no, I think like goblets. Yeah, you can pick it up. Don't spoil that! You can have fun with it. Okay. Well, he was trying to help. You asked a question he was helping you. Okay.

Great. Okay, I'm like skull. That would be the good one. Edit that out, AJ. Edit that out. All right, let me kick it off. First up from, thanks so much for your support,

from Gordon in Victoria. What a great over in town. That's great. Here in Australia, it's Matt. Matt Jay. Matt Jay, eating his ice cream out of a

novelty size ice cream scoop. Whoa. Oh, that's fun. Yeah. So he's holding the scoop. But it's huge. It's like it's big enough for like three. So you sort of have to hold it sideways.

Yeah. And you got a normal size. scoop to scoop into the scoop or can you scoop with the big scoop and then just eat straight out of the I think it depends on the venue you take it to the ice cream shop and if they're sometimes they'll let you scoop like they'll use your scoop yeah yeah or other times they'll say sorry I have to scoop my scoop into your scoop okay he's gone unhinged early yeah and I love it yeah yeah and Matt's order is chocolate chip cookie dough oh yeah lovely out of a big scoop I'm picturing like a grey nickels scoop two thousand cricket bat is that what you mean by a big scoop yeah yeah definitely definitely

The old Willow, Willow, Willow, Willa scoop. That's just, to me, it's just one of the great names for Crooked Bat. The Scoop 2,000. Because there's a scoop taken out of the back of it. Oh, really? Yeah. And there he is, a defensive block with the script 2000. A defensive block of cookies and cream, ice cream.

Thank you so much to Matt. I'd also love to thank from Portland, Oregon in the United States of America, Laura Arne. Laura Arne. How about I go flavour first and then? The vessel. How would you, again, I think this is maybe needs a bit of an Irish. Let me look at an Irish eyes.

I'm coming. Yeah, I don't know. A.E. R and E. Loxen looks Irish, isn't it? It does look at, yeah. Laura Arne. Has ordered pistachio. Pistachio, and she is using an urn.

Oh, that's full on. It's big. Wait, an urn is in like a... Is it like Grandma or something? She's having one last ice cream with Grandma. I was doing more of like a thing. that you would have boiling water that time. Oh, that kind of burn.

Yep, okay, and that's why it's important to clarify. Well, whoa, whoa, wow. Keith Richards, didn't he snort his dad or something? Could be like that. Yeah, yeah. Eat your mom. With pistachio. Thank you so much, Laura.

I'd also love to thank from Olympia in Washington and the United States. Am. Am. Am. Am. Am. Am. Am.

Am. And the flavor is. Neapolitan. Neapolitan. A bit of everything. A bit of everything. And it's being served in a fish bowl. I full 180ed on Nepal as a kid

I went strawberry vanilla chocolate but now chocolate vanilla strawberry Oh really? That's a full one that you're right? Yeah, full 180. Oh my gosh, I would probably say I used to think strawberry was number one but now it slipped to number two and chocolate's number one but vanilla is still third for me.

Yeah. But also the flavour of strawberries is never the best in those. No, that's the problem with it I think. I think I'd like a real strawberry maybe. Yeah, that's lovely. But also, I really love a good vanilla now. Yeah. How makes you think, doesn't it?

You learn a lot about yourself. The next, the Neapolitan quiz. You could learn a lot about yourselves. Next one comes from, address unknown, can only shun from deep within the fortress of the malls. Please, and thank you to Michael Giles. Michael Giles has ordered one of my childhood favorites, Rainbow.

Oh, I love a rainbow. Be you disappointed or otherwise when you found out what its real flavor was. Well, see, the rainbow paddle pops are, spoiler alert, caramel. Mm. Which I feel okay with, because I do like caramel. Mm. But I feel like the rainbow from the...

From a shop tasted different. Okay. I feel so too. Maybe it was still caramel-y, but it did taste a bit different. Interesting, yeah, because I was fully fooled by the paddle pop rainbow. I loved it. And I'm like, oh, it's sort of, I don't know, because caramel is such a shit color. It's, you know, it's brown.

Yeah. You know, it's a shit colour. But rainbows are magical. Yeah, agreed. I agree. Eat enough rainbow. So I think rainbow matches the caramel flavor better, if you know what I mean. Yes.

Agreed. And this rainbow is being served in a bowler hat. Oh, that's a bit of fun. Oh, hello. Hello. Oh, I shouldn't have put that back on. Oh, I've got a sticky head there. You know, fun stuff like that.

That is fun. Oh, my head's all stickyy. Oh, stripping down my gusset. Was that? Because his name is Giles. I feel, Charles does feel like a... A butler. Michael Giles.

Michael Giles. Hello, hello, hello. From Paisley in Great Britain. Oh, Paisley. Please. And thank you. To Donald Moran. Moran.

Donald Moran. Donald. Butter scotch. Butter scotch. Okay. Being served in on a teaspoon. Oh. It's so strong.

You only need a little bit. Wow. That's interesting. Just a slither. Wow. Because if you think about it, if you could be satisfied with just the free sample that they give you, that would never have to pay again. Yeah, that'd be good.

It's free for life. Thank you. Have a good day. And Donald is living that dream. But only because the butterscotch is so strong. So rich. Yes. A rich tapestry.

Thank you so much. Also, I'd love to thank from Toowoomba in Queensland, Australia, Alex Holly. Alex Holly has ordered a scoop of black raspberry chip. Whoa, that sounds awesome. I'm afraid the shop is out of cones. Oh. It's out of cups. Oh.

All they've got is a basketball that one of the owner's kids had. And they stabbed the ball. Wow. Cut it in half. Yeah, okay. And now they're handing out. Have they given a rinse? Oh, it's the inside.

Yeah. Oh, you don't have to rinse the inside. No, it's fine. Enjoy the rubbery taste. That's fine. No one's ever touched the inside. He's psychotic today I'm so sorry Alex

Are you trying to think of fucking round things To put food in It doesn't have to be round I mean it could be so many things Literally a cone You haven't used cone or cup yet I'm saving for the grand finale From

Sunbury in Victoria Spend a lot of great holidays in Sunbury Which is funny to think back to now Because it is just outside Is it literally something? Some of them now, yeah. Back then it was really. My, I got friends who lived there.

I love going out to Sumbry. From Sumbry in Victoria, please. And thank you, Jessica Cardi. And Jessica Cardi has a party in their mouth because they have ordered. They have ordered. Oh, my favourite. Mint chock chip. Oh, mint chock chip.

And you say party in their mouth. There's also a party in the receptacles mouth because it is, there's little wind-up teeth. Yeah. What? But with ice cream in it. That is fun. It's like you're making out with a teeth. It feels like you're making out with a teeth.

It's been a while, but geez, that is real virgin stuff from you, Dave. It's been a while. That's the only action Dave gets. Make it out with them teeth. Was it, was it the mint, took it a teeth? Like mint toothpaste? No, it's because Jess had said it's a party in your mouth. Okay.

And teeth, you know, I think parties. I think fake teeth. Who's attending a party in a mouth? Yeah. Teeth. From Oldgate in South Australia, please and thank you to Amber Rollins. What a, that's one of the great names. That is a great name.

That is a great name. And another party in the mouth. Cotton candy flavoured ice cream. Oh, wow. Fairy floss. Fairy floss, as we call it here. Which is the original name I learned recently. Oh.

That's what, I think that was... Straight sound, sorry about that. Oh. Oh. I think it was initially called fairy floss and then they, you know, change it to a probably better name, but we stuck with the original. I think cotton candy is nice. Yeah, cotton candy is great.

The cotton candy of fairy frost is being served in an empty cornflakes box. Ooh, you could fit quite a bit in. Yeah. Just keep fill up... And again, cardboardy taste. That's fun. I reckon ice cream shops will ever do like the 7-11 Slurpy Day type thing where they'll fill up whatever a septicle you can fit under the Duffling.

Love that day. So if you bring up. in like a giant cardboard box, you say, fill her up with ice cream boys. Beep, beep, maybe you back it in. It's still a cardboard box while you're backing it in. You are chaos when it comes to desserts. It's ridiculous. And let's go with our last one.

Still doesn't use cup or cone. From Missoula in MT in the US, it's aimed at. Grygo. Watermelon. Ooh. In a bowl. Oh my God. Bowl is another classic gab news.

But it's a salad bowl. Oh my gosh. Huge. That's wild. Yeah. You reversing that in? Beep. That's how big the bowl is.

M.T. Montana? Oh, great question. Let's look it up. That was a big sky. Home of. Missoula. Montana.

Home of Dana Carvey, I believe. Really? Maybe. Oh my goodness. Thank you so much. Angel, Amber, Jessica, Alex, Donald, Michael, Am, Laura and Matt. And that leaves us... Oh, my God.

So, Dana Carvey's from Missoula, Montana. Whoa. Oh, my gosh. Holy shit, Angel. And it's not a big place either. It looks like it has a population of about 73,000 or 117. 17 of you taking the metropolitan area. But not that many.

No. There could be a connection there, Angel. If you can get Dana Carvey on the show. Let us know. I'm pretty sure he moved to California decades ago, but still. Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter.

Also born there? David Lynch. Whoa. Really? Amazing. He's one of the more lynching characters I know. Don't you think? Actually, yeah, now that you put it like that.

Yeah. Yeah, I hadn't thought about that. Yeah. It's really, yeah, it's just an interesting guy. Yeah. He's very lynching. Very lynching. So the last thing we need to do is welcome a few people in the Triptitch Club.

and I had this sort today, just looking back straight to the top. What do you guys think about? I think I've maybe pitched this in the past. We do a little addendum. We won't have to do it for a few years. The Trip, Trip, Trip, Ditch Club. People have been in for nine years. We won't have to do it.

People will only be entering in the year 2026, I think. Oh, yeah. And what do we do for them? I think it would just be, they'd be tacked on. They'd be also, they'd be going on a separate room inside. Oh, like a little. There's a VIP in the VIP. Yeah.

Yeah, we'll build a new section in there and they would also get access. Well, we've got time to build it. Yeah, if we're thinking of it now in 2024. Yeah, that's all. We've got to get the planning permission. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But yeah, I think we've got the space. We could definitely do that.

It'll be November 2025. So, yeah. Oh, shit, okay. Well, that does bring it a bit closer. About almost a year and a half away. Okay. Well, if we get onto the planning now. We get the permits.

Yeah. Because we do everything above the board here. Of course we do. We're winking at each other. Above the board. Oh, I was wanking at you. Oh. Oh.

Stop wanking at us. Sorry. And then making eye contact whilst you're wanking at us. I thought we were all wanking at each other. Only two of us. It's weird when you have these misunderstandings that only work on paper when you're doing it. Oh, sorry, I thought you were all wanking. But I just thought on my way into the studio,

I thought that would be really cool. Yep. And I thought maybe just to give people some heads up, because I was looking at, there's some great names that we would remember as our earliest. Remember Steve Hanmer, the hammer of God or whatever we called him. And, yeah, Elijah Shelley and Adam Sox and stuff, they've been around since, like, basically we started. I don't know.

You know, I thought it'd be cool to circle back. If I was around, if I was on a Patreon for something from the beginning and I'd been on this long, I would then feel so bad to ever leave. Wouldn't you? I'd be like, they'll know I've left. No. And I'll feel so bad. No pressure team.

No pressure. I'm just saying that's how I would feel. Man, I'm just looking at all these lines from right up the top. No, no, no, no, no, that wasn't about them. I'm just saying that's how I would. I would personally feel mortified to leave the... I'd feel like a terrible person. Yeah, I feel like so embarrassed.

I'd be like, they're going to get this big notification. It's going to wake them up at 3 a.m. No, please. But I've left their page. You know, I'd feel more. Oh, Steve Hamner, no. No. Don't leave us now.

After all we've been through together. Jess is joking. Please don't turn this into a burden for them. That'd be the worst. No, that's right. If it's no longer your thing or you can't afford it for whatever reason, please, there's never any pressure. That's exactly what I'm saying. Jess won't judge you.

Well, maybe Jess will, but Matt, I won't look up the Patreon app at all, so don't stress. I can't log it on my phone anymore. What happened? I don't know. Just the other day, it was like, no, you have to log back in. And then I couldn't remember the password and I gave up. There's three people being inducted in. The password is Steve Hamner, 118.

I just, I'm, because he's, he's. Like, we have some patrons and supporters who are quite active and we talk to them regularly, you know, online and stuff. But there's some like, Steve, he doesn't really get in touch with it. So I was like, holy shit, the hammer's still involved. I'm stoked to hear that he's still involved. Yeah, Steve, this is your pre-tripted triptid shout out. Yeah, well, you've inspired. I think we could even call it the hammer wing or something.

Oh, that's nice. The Steve Hamden appreciation wing. That's lovely. Which could be, you could argue, would be brutal to Elijah who signed up hours later. It's like, we didn't have to wait for Steve to drop off and then we'll have to rename the wing. And now Steve, you can never drop off. That's right. All right.

So just three inductees. You can. I'd just be mortified. Anyway, yep. Three inductees into the Trip Ditch Club, which is why I won't tell Jess because she has apparently no access to that information. Sorry, I'm reading out. I'm getting ahead of ourselves. We got six this week.

It's double. Double. I was reading in halves, which is one of my issues that I have. Now, if you don't know, this is the, this is where people who've been signed up on the shoutout level or above for three straight years get welcomed into a club that they're not allowed to leave, but they're glad of it because they wouldn't want to even if they could. It just happens that it's a one-way valve entry and we can't. We've tried to fix them.

We can't. Yeah. So there's just no exit. but it's a fantastic place. There's everything you'd ever need in there. And the way it works is Dave books a band. I don't know how they leave. Well, I guess all the bands remain in there as well.

Is that right? They're trapped in there. They're happy in there. Yeah, Dave books a band or what usually way in advance. So don't expect it to be relevant to ice cream or anything. And Jess also creates sometimes a drink, sometimes a food dish, sometimes both. Yep. Well, we've got an ice cream bar this week.

Oh, that is exciting. And so it's sort of like. when you'd go to smorgies as a kid so you could get ice cream, you can put your own toppings on it and stuff. I've put some, I've got like some hot sauce and stuff. It is too hot, but the ice cream is cold. But the hot chocolate sauce is actually like it. It just instantly melts the ice cream.

Yeah, and probably through the bowl. I love it. Everyone, I reckon as a kid in Melbourne at least, or maybe in Australia or maybe in the world, probably not, but has like a place that they remember for special occasions they'd go to that had a desert bar or dessert bar? A dessert bar. Why would I have a desert bar? Mine?

Filled with dessert. Well, when I was a child, you know, it was, I think we were coming out of an ice age and just having a little spot of desert. Oh, my God. It was a treat. Yes. It's a real oasis. Sorry, that was privileged talking.

Sorry about that. No, but mine was, um, uh, pizza hut. Which was, and another one was, which I never had, which was, what was that other classic, all you can eat one? Was it smorgies? Smorgies was a big one. But there was another one. There was another one, you're right. Sizzlers.

Sizzlers, that's right. Yeah, I've never been to a sizzler, but I had friends and that was always. You had friends. Well, look, I went to school with people and they would, they'd brag about going to sizzler sometimes. Never got the privilege, but did go to Pizza Hut. Yeah, just getting like. Those cubes of jelly? Yes, cubes of jelly.

And like chocolate moose. And smarties maybe. And soft-serve ice cream. And have as much as it. You can just keep going back for a nut. That was the good. Those were the good old days. Yeah.

Anyway, so you've got to set up like that only good. Because it was awful. Looking back, it was probably disgusting. Yeah, this is pretty good. I would just steer clear of the hot sauce. Okay, great. Because it's far too hot. Dave, have you booked a band?

You're never going to believe it. What have you done? I've actually booked this Canadian band that I've just been introduced to. I think they're Canadian. I've already forgotten. You're never going to believe it. When Jess mentioned them before, like, oh my God, when you were playing them before.

Oh. Getting the stage tonight. Fast Romantics are here? Wow. Fast Romantics. Are they Canadian? Remember when Jess brought it up? I think everyone listening should know that that was Jess's recommendation.

Yes. If they become one of your favorite bands, remember the Jess. That was for me. I meant Jess was playing it and I couldn't believe it. And then Matt, you're reading out the lyrics and I was like, they're about to hit the stage. We're going to hear it tonight. From Calgary, yes.

And I think Piper also suggested them a little. little bit, but I think mainly it was Jess. To the show, but I obviously booked these guys months in advance. Yes. So it's just an amazing coincidence, Parker. I appreciate it. And so that I got involved accidentally because I didn't realize you were going to be back, because I've booked ice cream hands to play as well.

Also coincidental, I booked them. Oh, really? So we got two. There's a bit mini festival in here tonight. Yeah. Ice cream hands. That is happening a bit. I wish you two would just communicate off pod.

Just every now there. Can you tell Dave that I'm not ready to communicate? Okay. I am looking forward to ice cream hands playing their hit, no weapon but love. Yeah. Looking forward to that. Do you remember ice cream hands? No.

They were an old Triple J type of band, I think, from like the 2000s. Oh, I thought you might have just typed as a Spotify ice cream, but there you go. Let me have a look. I mean, there's a few. There was that song by Muscles. Remember that ice cream song? That was another big Triple J hit. No.

You keep saying that because I used to work in Triple J, but I was just a song. when you're a, like three years. Yeah, exactly. So, no, I don't remember. They don't give you a crash course in every song we've ever played? No, no, they don't. And they should. You don't remember ice cream hands?

You don't, they don't give you a crash course in when Triple J was actually good. Back when I was young. So we got six people to welcome in. Oh my God, yes, I thought we were done. We're not done. And our foods. We're not done. We're doing our most important part.

All right. So Dave's going to hype them up with weak word play Jess hypes up Dave. Unbelievable. Well, I'm just setting the bar, setting the. I'm going to read them out. I've got their names on a clipboard. Here we go. First up, please welcome and make them so welcome

and get ready to enjoy a great double-headed, double-head line show. From St. Austell in Con in Great Britain. What would that be? Coventry. No, it doesn't matter. From Con, it's Bailey Sage. Hit the stage, Bailey Sage.

That is so good. Come on, keep the flow. I've lost the page. Unbelievable. And from Tacoma in Washington in the United States, it's Marcus Mota. They've working me from my Tacoma. It's Marcus Mata. Marcus.

Woo! From Sydney, Sin City itself up in New South Wales, Australia. It's Clancy Greening. More like Clancy gleaming. It's how I feel when I see Clancy. You're gleaming. You are gleaming. Yeah.

Okay, what are you gleaming? And from, from address I know can only shoot from deep within the fortress of the miles. Please, welcome Mary de Groot. I give a hoot for Mary de Groot. Yes. Hoot hoot. You're Mary de Groot.

I am de Groot. Is that anything? Is that a reference? Shut the fuck up. From Roseville in MN.U.S. Maybe Minnesota. It's not a cat. They're not a dog either.

They're a legend. It's not a cat. And finally, from Cambridge in CamGB. I reckon that's Cambridge. What's that one for? It's Vicky H. Look, usually I'm pretty picky. And I continue to be picky.

It's only for the best for us. It's Vicky. Woo-hoo. Picky, Vicky. Ah, thank you so much to Vicky, Nodda, Mary, Clancy, Marcos and Bailey. Welcome in, make yourselves at home, grab some ice cream. Head on over to the band room, and we're going to have a great night. We're going to party to celebrate your entries into the club.

Welcome. Now that brings us in the episode. Just anything we need to do before we build this baby home? You can suggest a topic if you bloody want to, your little cutie pets. There's a link of the show notes. It's also on our website, which is dogoonpod.com, which is where you can find information about our other podcasts, about tours, merch, all that sort of good stuff. And you can follow us at Do Go On Pod across social media.

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