Do Go On - 456 - The Murder of Albert Snyder

Episode Date: July 17, 2024

On the evening of the 20th of March 1927 a murder took place at the New York home of Albert and Ruth Snyder, what followed was an investigation and court case that gripped America!This is a comedy/history podcast, the report begins at approximately 05:49 (though as always, we go off on tangents throughout the report).Support the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: patreon.com/DoGoOnPodSupport the show on Apple podcasts and get bonus episodes in the app: http://apple.co/dogoon Live show tickets: https://dogoonpod.com/live-shows/ Watch Do Go On The Quiz Show: https://youtu.be/GgzcPMx1EdM?si=ir7iubozIzlzvWfKSubmit a topic idea directly to the hat: dogoonpod.com/suggest-a-topic/Check out our merch: https://do-go-on-podcast.creator-spring.com/  Twitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: [e-mail] Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/Who Knew It with Matt Stewart: https://play.acast.com/s/who-knew-it-with-matt-stewart/ Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader ThomasDo Go On acknowledges the traditional owners of the land we record on, the Wurundjeri people, in the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders, past and present. REFERENCES AND FURTHER READING:One Summer by Bill Brysonhttps://allthatsinteresting.com/ruth-snyderhttps://murderpedia.org/female.S/s/snyder-ruth.htmhttps://www.findagrave.com/memorial/102639881/albert_edward-snyder Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Oh my God, we're coming to do live shows in Melbourne and Sydney coming up. Dave, what are the details? We are coming up to Sydney very, very soon. Live Saturday, July 13th, 2024 at the Ritz Cinema in Randwick, our first podcast in Sydney in almost two years. What a great venue. Come on down. So excited. And then, Dave, you and I are going to be doing a live Who Knew It with Matt Stewart at 3pm on August 3rd at Comedy Republic.

It's the 100th episode. Whoa! It is so exciting and Jess where can people get tickets? At DougaOnePod.com! You really put me on the spot there and I did okay. Hello and welcome to another episode of Do Go On. My name is Dave Warnocky and as always, I'm here with Jess Perkins and Matt Stewart. Hello, it's me, Matt Stewart, a ghost. Are you dead?

No, that's my full name. Matt Stewart, a ghost. I've changed it by Deedpole. How did you not know that? We all went with him to Deedpole. Remember? I also spit my voice in two. Was that also by Deedpole?

By Deedpole. Got to pay extra. Yeah. And while you're here, changing your name, would you like to split your voice at all? Yes. Please. You can pick any accent you like, British, for example. Could I get my friend Jess?

He called me his friend. Yes. Yes. And as she didn't even flinch. Play it cool, Jess. Okay. Thank you so much for being here. Thanks everyone for listening.

A pleasure. Thank you for being here. For the people who's listening for the first time, Jess, what would you tell them? I'd tell them- What a little pitch what this show is. Okay, here's what I'd say. If you're listening for the first time, um, where the fuck have you been? I hope that rock you've been under was really nice.

Yeah, oh, is that new listener Sandra Sully with the late news? An incredible reference. No, actually, hello. We're very nice and you'll, you are welcome here. This is a podcast all about how my life. Do you want me to stop in here? Yeah, I can do it. I can do it.

So one of the three of us research is a topic usually suggested to us by our wonderful listeners, which you are now one of, and, um, we go away, we research, we bring it back. We tell it to the other two. We call it like a report and the other two listen politely and never go on dog shit riffs. Yes. Why would we? Why would we?

That would be silly. If it was an option not to, of course we would. What are we comedians? No, we're historians. Don't look it up. We make that very clear in the descriptions. Very clear. Uh, yes, that was after a lot of time, people on YouTube going, get to the point.

And I'm like every, every week I'd specify even more that comedy, underline, dogshit riffs, tangents. Not for everyone. We're sorry. Why are they laughing about this brutal murder? Well, it's a comedy podcast and also we didn't know about the murder because we didn't know what the topic was. That's right. Et cetera.

I know what the topic is because I'm doing the report this week. And we always get onto the topic with a question. And my question this week, hands on buzzers. What decade? Dave's my buzzer, though. Has the nickname roaring? Jess! Buzz! Sorry, let me buzz for you, Jess.

Yes. Jess. Thank you, Jess. Yes? Jess! Thank you, Dave. Uh, the 20s! That's right! Yeah! Which, I mean, in the classic voice, how do they say it? Ah, the roaring 20s!

Yeah, exactly. At the time they were describing themselves as the Roaring. Yeah, from January the 1st. Yeah. They could tell something was changing. The winds were a-changing. Yeah, the winds were roaring. I read a bit of an article where I got distracted as you know we always do when we're in researching topics,

you go off on little things and go, no, I'm trying to tell this story. But there was this article that that suggested that if it wasn't for the Great Depression, that the 20s would be more remembered like the 60s. You know, like it was moving that way equality and everything was opening up. Women were getting, you know, more rights and, and whatever. And it was heading that way, but the great depression sort of sent everything backwards a little bit. Wow.

And then, you know, took to the sixties, but a lot of those ideas were already around at that time. That's interesting. I wouldn't have thought that. No, yeah. I was sort of surprised where they were as well. Well, it was one part of one essay I read, but it was on a university website. OK. So I believe that. Mr. Academia. I think that pretty much.

I did a little shimmy when I said that. Oh, Mr. Academia. Oh, Professor Matthew. Hello. Oh, Jess. I didn't know you were a flapper. Something from the 1920s. Wow. Yeah. Dave wouldn't get it, but Jess and I do.

We get it. Cause we're, you know, we're children of the, of the, Corn? The corn. Children of the corn. Children of the corn. Children of the corn.

We're both wearing yellow today. True. True. True. I'm really hyper. I had a coffee and now I've started to have a Coke. Matt's had two coffees. I'm worried about him too.

I'm cheery as shit. But I asked for this one to be low-caf and they said, what does that mean? You want like half strength. And they said, they said like weak. Yeah. And then we got a fun relationship with our local cafe. You do. And she goes, oh yeah.

And she goes to me, never order like that again. Which is very funny. Made me laugh. That is pretty good. Never order like that. It's weak. Wait, I'm being weak or? And she's like, no, the order say weak coffee.

OK. I thought low calf sounded good, but. No. It sounds stupid. I made a fool of myself. Anyway, tonight's and today's's depending on when you're listening, this topic is set in the roaring 20s. Wow.

Uh, let us begin. Okay. You're not going to tell us anything about it. Just set in the 20s. Yeah. Love it. Actually, funny, I read something recently about the 20s. Oh, no.

Dave goes on to explain this whole story. Anyway, Matt, what were you going to say? Yeah, I spent two hours. Like, oh, well, yeah, no, that was really well told. But he's just ripping it off the top of his head. That was actually much better than anything I've written down. Yeah, nothing to add. Thanks for joining us. I guess we do the Patreon section then. Thanks for joining us. I guess we do the Patreon section and... So on the evening of the 20th of March, 1927, Albert and Ruth Snyder slept in their house in Queens Village, New York City after returning from a party at approximately 2 AM. Oh my god, party animals.

They slept in the same room, but in separate beds. That's what they say. Are they siblings or spouses? Spouses. Separate beds. Okay. Yeah. I'm kidding you, do you?

Whatever. Do you think it counts as a separate bed if you push them together? Technically, is that still separate beds? Well, I think a lot of hotels will sell it as a- As one, yeah. As one, even though like we can see the gap. Okay, okay. I think here's the distinction.

Separate beds, completely different sheets and doona cover, duvet, whatever, blankets, that's separate beds. Okay. Two mattresses pushed together. Yeah, let me fucking finish. Two mattresses pushed together, same, like one big sheet over at one big blanket. That's just a double bed, baby. Okay.

That's what I think. What about a little wall in the middle of pillows? That's just- Dave, are you asking us about your home life? Yeah, that's just a marriage in trouble. Yeah. And what if you wake up and someone's smothering you with hair below? Hey, Dave, would it be fair to say that you're just a couple of nights away from someone

going to stay with their mother? I mean, the dog house. Literally. And we don't have a dog house. I'm in the backyard. And the dog's in the bed. The dog is literally in the bed. So yes, they slept in the same room. And the dog's in the bed. The dog is literally in the bed.

So yes, they slept in the same room, but in separate beds. All of a sudden, middle of the night, Ruth Snyder was awoken by noises coming from upstairs. When she got up to investigate, she found what she later described to police as a giant man who was standing outside the bedroom door. There was a second man who was not visible to her and the two men conversed in a foreign language.

Next thing she knows, she's knocked out cold and doesn't come to for six hours. In the meantime, the intruders enter the bedroom strangling Albert, her husband, with picture wire before giving him a knockout blow with something called a sash weight from the bedroom window. Do you know what a sash weight is? I didn't know what it was. As in like something that goes around the curtains?

Yeah, it's like a little heavy weight. It's like a counterweight for sash windows. Oh, OK. But yeah, it's just according to the dictionary, it's a weight attached by cord to each side of the sash of a sash window to balance it at any height. They, I don't know what it is. They're just little whites basically. Little whites, yep. But little heavy things.

I don't know what a sash window is. They look nice. I looked them up, but yeah, I don't know. We're too young to know about these sort of details. We're here, we're cool. We went alive in the roaring 20s. I mean, I was, but I was... If you remember the 1920s, were you really there?

Yeah, you went to it at right. That's what I always said. What kind of 20s are we in now? Oh, I don't know. I guess only, you know, if you were around, if you remember the 1920s, were you really there? Yeah, you weren't doing it right. That's what I always said. What kind of 20s are we in now?

Oh, I don't know. I guess only history will tell. Hmm. Maybe like the yawning 20s? Yeah, the snoozing. Yeah. Snoozing 20s. It was disappointing on January 1st.

I did hope to wake up to welcome back to the roaring 20s, but they didn't say it. No. So we don't know what it is. But this is in 1927. Yeah. So maybe it'll take a few years to really get into the 20s. Wait, did you say snoring 20s? I they didn't say it. No. So we don't know what it is. But this is in 1927. Yeah. So maybe it'll take a few years to really get into the 20s. Wait, did you say snoring 20s? I said yawning.

Why didn't we say snoring? Roaring, snoring. Fuck! Jesus! That is really good. Or just boring. Boring 20s. Oh my god.

Oh my god. Weird. I went through to yawning like an idiot. What are we doing here? I don't know. We're not very good at this. No. Talk about dog shit. Riffs.

That was a weird emphasis. It was. Talk about dog shit. Little pause. That would make sense if dog shit literally was it. Anyway, so yes. This is not good. No, it's not good.

Can you say knockout blow? I'm not sure if he's still, this man's alive. Strangle with piano wire sounds like that sounds like good night. Knockout blow is. He dead. Yeah. I'm putting it softly, but they caved in his head. Oh my God.

Okay. I want, you know, I didn't mean to put it in such full on terms. Yeah, that was full on, that made me a bit sick. They bludgeoned him. Bludgeoned, he was, yeah. Oh, that's horrific. Then the two assailants ransacked the house before fleeing with Ruth Snyder's jewels. They left very few clues of their identities, but this was in the days before fingerprints

and DNA evidence. Something they did accidentally leave behind though, was an Italian language newspaper on a table downstairs. Okay, now they were speaking a foreign language. I wonder if it was French. You connecting some dots. A lot of people speak French. It could be French.

It could be French. It's quite, actually, like, what's the, like, it could be like Spanish. Spanish is actually quite a, you know, it's a big language or like, could have been like Mandarin. Yeah, I reckon it might have been Man. Mathematically. Mathematically, yeah. Yeah.

So just like statistically, yeah. Yeah. I reckon the Italian language newspaper was a red herring. Yes. Or maybe they'd used it to wrap up their red herring. They had fish and chips. Oh, they're British. Yes.

They love fish and chips over there. And when you're in America, everyone's speaking English with a British accent, it sounds like a foreign language. Oh yeah. Especially if you've woken up in the middle of the night and you're hearing, how you going Gabbner? What are you saying? Yeah.

I don't understand. Water, what's that? Water, wo-ah. Wo-ah. All right, let's go back slightly. So who was this victim, Albert Snyder? Well, he was born on the 11th of October, 1882 in Kings County, New York.

And he was just 44 years old at the time of his death. At the time of his murder, he was an art editor for the magazine Motorboating. OK. And that's a magazine about? Brrr. I don't know. Yeah, I agree. But he just covered it artistically.

Yeah, that's right. Very tastefully done. Very tastefully. A tasteful motorboat. There's nothing better. Just page after page of photos of motorboats. This magazine was part of the massive Hearst Media Empire, which seems to regularly come up on the show. But have we ever covered Patty Hearst, who was the kidnapped-

The kidnapped from- No. No, we haven't. It's in the hat. People have definitely recommended it. I think I might have put it up to the vote before, and it hasn't quite gone through. For the newspaper strike, did you mention William Randolph Hearst? No. No, we haven't. It's in the hat. It is in the hat. People have definitely recommended. I think I might have put it up to the vote before and it hasn't quite gone through. For the newspaper strike, did you mention William Randolph Hearst?

Yes, that's right. Yeah. Yep. And it seems like it's a big family. Which was in the 20s as well, I think. Many generations, like. No, it wasn't. Yeah, but I think it was A10.

I think maybe it was the second generation already by this stage. The guy who started it was earlier, but yeah. Must have been just a big hectic empire. Ruth wasn't his first love. 15 years earlier, he was heartbroken when his fiance, Jesse Gouchard, died of pneumonia shortly before their marriage. I hope you made it very clear to Ruth that she wasn't his first choice. You are a runner up.

Just the way that's... She wasn't his first love. I was a runner up. Just the way that's she wasn't his first love. Okay. Still loves it. I mean, they're happy. Two years later, he met and fell for Ruth Brown, who became Ruth Snyder. They got married. Two years is okay.

And according to Bill Bryson, who covers this story in his book, One Summer, which focuses on the American summer of 1927. And this book, it's a great book and it covers so many topics we've talked about in the past as well. That's a pivotal year. Yeah, it was. Yeah, I guess you could sort of probably turn a lot of years into a, you know, if you focus in on things.

Not 1994. Nothing happened. Name one thing that happened in 1994. Name one other thing. The Eagles won their second Premiership. OK, so only one thing happened. Yes, but so the other one of the other big things he focuses on is your man, the plane guy. What's his name?

The plane guy. Howard Hughes. David Cooper. Another one of your plane guys that Dave's on a... Mr. Concord. You might have done a double episode of it. You've done a lot of plane episodes. Not DB Cooper. No, doesn't matter, but it's the guy who flew... broke a record. His baby ended up getting... Ah, Lindbergh. Lindbergh. Yeah, yeah. So Lindbergh... Like as this story wraps up, America gets obsessed with Lindbergh like a couple of days later. And that's how.

The flight bit or the mystery bit? The flight bit. Right. Gotcha. Wow. Anyway, so this is from Bill Bryson's book about Ruth. She was 13 years his junior and not notably attracted to him. But when after their third or fourth date, he offered her a gumball size engagement ring, her modest defenses crumbled.

She later explained helplessly to a friend, I just couldn't give up that ring. Hang on. I need to do some maths. She's 13 years his junior. Yes. And his fiance had died 15 years prior and he was 44 when he died. Yes. I think I, I don't know.

I might've mucked those numbers up, but I think she was like 20 when that, and he was 33 or something. Okay. She was working as a secretary. Yeah. Okay. But yeah, she, she obviously she didn't. In my head, she was like 12.

I was like, what the fuck? It could have just given her a gumball, you idiot. It seems like. Don't waste a diamond on a child. But it does seem like the ring play was a big pull for him. He's just like, I love you. She's like, I love you too, ring. Yeah.

Just kissing a ring. I know people like that. They got married just four months later and moved into his house. He's worried he's going to get over the ring. Yeah. Yeah. Got to do this quick. You still like the ring, right? She's going to look past the ring and see him and go, Oh, God.

Oh, right. Don't worry about it. But despite marrying Ruth and having a daughter with her, Albert couldn't get over his first love, Jesse Gouchard. That's fucking brutal. It's pretty grim stuff. That's awful. According to a bio on Find-A-Grave by Linda Davis, his wife claimed that she was her husband's second choice

as the love of her husband's life died years before. Referring to Jessie, obviously. This reasoning was supported with him hanging a portrait of Jessie in their home, keeping memorabilia, such as scrapbooks of their vacations, and naming his boat in honor of her. Daily, he wore a lapel pin with the initials JG inscribed on the back. And after their daughter was born, he spent his free time alone on the boat, named after his ex-fiance. Right. Now, it makes sense why they're sleeping in separate beds because he was sleeping in one with Jessie.

He was sleeping, yeah, with the, what, the ashes of Jessie in an urn. You stay over there. We're over here. That's full on. All of it's a lot, isn't it? That's, that's, that's therapy. Yeah. I mean, you want to honour the ones you've lost, of course. Of course. You don't want to forget. But there's a respectful way to do that.

And you don't have to marry two years later if you're- No. If you're not ready. If you're not ready if you're not ready Yeah, and I sort of wonder it goes like it's maybe a chicken or egg thing Maybe if his new wife loved him back, maybe he wouldn't be so he wouldn't be mourning The time when someone actually did love him so much. It's her fault. No, I'm just wondering. I'm just wondering and I'm just I'm just deciphering What you're saying? It's Ruth's fault. Well, you can reserve that.

See what you think at the end, I guess. Oh, but anyway, it does not sound like it was a great marriage. No, it's a pretty sad state of affairs. Yeah. So the day after the murder, the New York Times ran a front page story headlined, Art Editor is Slain in Bed, W tied, home searched, motive mystifies police. They're just like, this is a confusing, baffling situation. What's happened here?

If I was walking past that newspaper, I wouldn't bother buying it because I think I've heard everything. You've told me everything. Quite a front page headline. Thank you so much. Great. I know that story for free. Yeah. I'll be keeping my five cents.

Thank you very much. See you tomorrow. According to Brightwell, if you did, you would have missed this. According to Bryson, the story noted that a Dr. Vincent Juster from St. Mary Immaculate Hospital had examined Ms. Snyder, the Ruth, that is. The examiner.

The examiner, and couldn't find any bump on her that would explain her six hours of unconsciousness. Indeed, he couldn't find any injuries on her at all. Perhaps he suggested tentatively it was the trauma of the event rather than actual injury that accounted for a prolonged collapse. Oh no. But like, you know, you faint in fear or whatever.

You're not out for six hours. Yeah, but maybe it just becomes a nice sleep. Yeah. You wake, you can't awake and go, I can't be bothered dealing with this. Say you fell in a nice nook. Oh, that's all right. Yeah. On some nice comfy. You're warm.

You got a little blankie. And you're like, if you're thinking, oh, there's a giant around. I'm just going to stay. I'm just going to stay a swim until I know the giant's gone. You know the feeling of coming out of a general anesthetic? Where you sort of, you wake up, but you're still kind of sleepy. And you sort of have to wheel yourself back to reality. Yeah, no, sometimes I'm usually fighting to go back to sleep.

And the nurses are going, Jess, wake up. And I'm like, fuck off. I'm warm and cozy. Leave me alone. So at that point, the doctor decides to come around and tell you what they've found. Hey, hey, you won't remember anything I'm about to say, but I have to go. So what we found is, cancer, man, man, man, man, man, man. And you're like, did they say it was?

It wasn't? Like, what's happening? I was asleep. And then back to sleep again. And then they're gone. They're doing someone else's surgery. And you never know what happened. And all you heard was, man, man, man, man, cancer.

And you're not sure if it was like your star sign. He's just telling you his star sign. Damn it! Man, man, man, man, man, by lotto tickers. Man, man, man, man, man. I love the word Matt and I race to a joke. That word means another thing. That word means another thing.

That word means another thing. That word means another thing. That word means another thing. That word means another thing. That word means another thing. That word means another thing. That word means another thing. That word means another thing. That word means another thing. Could have been the tropic. So yeah, so this doesn't, the police like, well, this is a bit strange. Yeah. No bumps.

But it wasn't the only detail that wasn't adding up for the cops. As Bryson continues, for one thing, the Snyder house showed no sign of forced entry. And in any case, it was an oddly modest target for murderous jewel thieves. The detectives found it curious too that Albert Snyder had slept through a violent scuffle just outside his door, and the Snyder's 9-year-old daughter Lorraine, in a room across the hall, also heard nothing. It also seemed strange that burglars would break into a house and evidently pause to read an anarchist newspaper, the Italian newspaper, before placing it neatly on a table and proceeding upstairs.

Right. Oddest of all, Mrs. Snyder's bed, the one from which she had arisen to investigate the noise in the hallway, was tidally made as if it had not been slept in. Oh, come on. Oh my God. I mean, if that is a mistake, how stupid is that? Yeah, that's dumb. Yeah, I was asleep in that bed right there.

Well, obviously when I got up, because I heard foreign men outside the door, I thought, well, I'd hate for them to see my bed unmade. It's a habit. You know, I wake up, I just make the bed. Yeah, autopilot. I might've even been out while I did it. You know, lots of people say that. They say, make your bed first thing in the morning.

And I do. It's a habit I have. You take, you've started the day with a whim. That's right. You come back to your bed late in the day. You know, it's ready for you. Well, when the cops asked her about this, she was unable to give an explanation saying Hobbes can cuss. I don't know. As the detective is puzzled over these anomalies, one of them idly lifted a corner of the mattress on Mrs. Snyder's bed and there revealed the jewels that she had reported stolen.

You dumb bitch. Sorry, your face told me that I'd gone too far there. No, no, no. And I do apologise. Hey, look. I do apologise. Hey, we just want genuine reactions, that's all. Well, my thought was, this poor woman's been framed.

This poor lady. How dare you. I stand by what I said. I just didn't like that I obviously, you know, Matt didn't like it. No, I think I loved it. I think I loved it. You don't understand my love face. I don't.

It's... No, I'm shocked. I'm shocked by how much I love something. That's fantastic. That's why he gasps every time Dave walks into the room. Those eyes. I know, I'm used to it. Those big beautiful blue eyes.

It's obvious what's happened to you. Some Italian anarchists have broken into their house. Been a little bit tired. Haven't gone fully upstairs. They've just sat in the lounge room for a little bit. They've put the newspaper, put the newspaper down, gone upstairs. She's come out, heard them. They've hit her with something. She's been knocked out for six hours.

A big man has come in and strangled and then bashed her husband. And then they've made the bed as an apology. Yeah. And then they felt guilty and said, actually, the stones we're about to steal, you can have those and we'll see you later. Here's a couple extras. Exactly. felt guilty and said, actually, the stones we're about to steal, you can have those. And we'll see you later. Here's a couple extras. Exactly. Have they checked?

Is there extras? Oh, yeah, I don't ever think they bothered checking. Is there a tip? Lazy police work. Absolutely. The 20s. Yeah. They don't police like that anymore.

Absolutely. Phoning it in. Let me tell you. Were phones invented? Uh, no. No. Shitty ones. The Cs in the cans.

So, yeah, all pretty curious. Daveitty ones. Especially using the cans. Yeah. So yeah, all pretty curious. Dave, I love your thoughts on it, but the police went in a different direction. Oh, what were your thoughts? Dumb bitch. Yeah, the police were more lined up with Jess. Their focus turned to Ruth Snyder. They listed all the things that didn't add up and she replied by breaking down and confessing the crime.

Okay, so she's been framed and now they've made her admit it. Oh my god, yeah, they're like, they're- It's a stitch up. Yeah. They're saying you've got to admit to it or we'll kill your kid. Do you think they're in cahoots with the Italians and the cops are in cahoots? Yes, and the giant man. The giant man.

Yeah, he was a giant Italian cop. That's what- Whoa. That's a big reveal. He's the connection between the two groups. Yeah, I mean, it's funny with these old stories where you hear different versions of it. I did read some that she was tight lipped till later, but you know, I think she, one way or another, she admitted to it soon

after okay been accused of it but she said she did not do it alone telling them that it was mainly the work of her secret lover a man named Judd Grey. She's a real piece of shit. You hate her. I hate her. I still think she's innocent and Judd Grey is quite the villain name. Judd Grey. Mr Grey. And but you remember, I mean, it's hard to know where the sympathies lie. The wedding, the marriage was pretty grim. I don't know if this is the way out.

Oh true, yeah. He was still in love with his dead fiance. But she did get a gumball sized ring. That's pretty good. But depends, I mean, some gumballs are smaller than others. How big, how big a gumball, how long have they been sucking on it? Yeah. You know what I mean?

Yeah. We want a fresh gum ball. We want one of those novelty sized ones. A super sucker. You know when you could get those, it was a ring lollipop like the lollipop was like a diamond. From the same brand that did push and push pop? Yeah, probably.

You'd get them in like a, you know, in a party bag or something and you could wear it and walk around and go. Yeah, you could have slobber on your fingers. Disgusting and fun. Yeah. Now that's pretty big, but I more tend to imagine in the nineties when we went to Sea World, my sister brought back a Gobstopper that was like the size of a tennis ball. Jesus.

And it would just sit on her desk in her bedroom. And you'd lick a bit. That's very strange, isn't it? Because you can't put that in your mouth. No, you have to lick it. Yeah. Until it got small enough to go in your mouth. And I think it would take six months to eat this. That's crazy.

When I said super sucker, what I meant to say was gobstopper. Neither word was right. But anyway, gobstopper is so dangerous. Don't give that to children. Do you watch the movie? What was it called? But it was like murder was all based around this Gobstopper stuck in the throat.

Was it just called Gobstopper? Yeah, I think it was. Maybe, and it was with like, It was, yeah. It was like, it was sort of like a teen movie. Yes. And then there's a group of girls had to cover it up. Yeah.

Yeah, I have seen that. Jawbreaker was the movie. Jawbreaker! Gobstopper movie is Jawbreaker. Is that what they call them? That's another name for the same reason. Yeah, I think Jawbreaker's in it. What a a movie is jawbreaker. Is that what they call them? There's another name for the same reason. Yeah, I think jawbreakers in it. What a funny name. Yeah, Rose McGowan's in it.

Rose McGowan, that's right. Anyway, so. Oh, fucking Judy Greer's in it. Judy Greer always plays a funny best friend. Judy Greer. You know, Judy Greer. Is she from Arrested Development? Yeah.

Oh, yeah, she's great. She's so funny. She's so good. Eyes up here. Because she has in Arrested Development, Yeah. Judicry. Oh yeah, she's great. She's so funny. She's so good. Eyes up here. Judicry. Because she has, in Arrested Development, her nipples are pointy.

That's right. Funny angles. Anyway, so Ruth Snyder has fingered Judd Gray, her secret lover. Hey, we've all fingered a lover. What? The police. The police have said, we don't need to know about this. That's fine.

That's between you and Judd. We're asking about your husband. You and Judd and God. So the police arrest Ruth and then begin their search for Judd Gray. OK, sure. But who is this Judd Gray character? Right. And why is she so quick to turn?

Like, if it's really your lover, are you just not going to go down with a ship to protect your lover? Hmm. Come on, Ruth. The problem is the ship is named after her husband's ex. I don't want to go down with her. I don't want to go down with her. I've had enough time with this lady. A portrait of her is in every room in my house. I don't need to go down with her forever.

I have to look at her face when I'm on the toilet. It's weird. I'm going to put a framed picture of you on the back of my toilet door. I love that so much. So we're making eye contact. This one's for you, Dave. And then, and you cut out the eye hole so when Dave's ever around, he can actually just look. Yeah, I prefer that.

Yeah. But in lieu of real Dave. Dave, I need to peek and you come over. Dave, I can't do it without you. Please, just this once. You know it drives me up without having your eyes on me. of real Dave. Dave, I need to pee, can you come over? Dave, I can't do it without you. Please, just this once. You know it drives me up without having your eyes on me. That's a bit weird.

It's okay. Okay. We can try again next time. There'll be a better joke next time. So, Chud Gray. Yes. Chud Gray. Like I mentioned earlier, the marriage between Albert and Ruth wasn't a particularly happy one. They were not a good match, potentially because they were in different

stages of their life. Albert wanted the quiet life of a middle-aged man. You know, he was in his mid 30s by this stage. Yeah, he's old. He's old. In their mid 30s. Disgusting. Disgusting. Into his 40s, you know, by the end of their marriage. Oh my God, 40s? It's over. And sure, at that stage, you just like get the walker out, put me in front of TV and I'm in bed at 4pm.

You know, like in your 40s. Yeah. Ugh. Ruth on the other hand, she's in her 20s and she wants to party. It's the 20s. The 20s. Flappers. It's, uh, women are starting to get out there and, you know.

And flap. And flap. You're in your 20s, in the 20s. You know, like a bird inside a library or a classroom. Yeah. They're panicking. They can't get out. Women.

Um, always be panicking. That's a classic Joss, Joss. That's a classic Joss Pockensburg. That's a classic Joss Pockensburg, who's my cover band comedian act for Jess Perkins comedy. Intribute. J Just Pockens. Why there's so many spoons? Yeah. Why the walls wet?

That's another good one. Always be panicking. I don't do it. There's no context. It's just bits and bits and bits I remember. You're my biggest fan. You remember more than I do. So so yeah, they they they're not a great match in different place in life. Also, there's the fact that he refused to take down the photos of his ex fiance.

Perhaps part of the reason he held onto the love of Jesse, though, I guess, is like I said, maybe he was missing the time that he was loved back. I don't know. If you're lucky enough to love a Jesse in your life, you hold on to that forever. Let me tell you. Yes. Jessies love like no other. Really? Okay.

They are a precious gift. Jessies. Yes. Yes. Do you get it? I do. Do you get it? Because it's like my name?

Oh. Yeah. Yeah. I was actually, I was talking about myself. Oh my God. So, so the, the marriage is dragging on, you know. Do you feel like this marriage is dragging on? God, this marriage is dragging.

What's it been? Three? It feels like 30. Jesus, this is dragging. But yeah, they're pretty deep in there, quite a few years in when Judd Gray enters the story. Courtney Bryson, Ruth took to going out alone. In 1925, in a cafe in Manhattan,

she met Judd Gray, a traveling salesman for the Bien Jolie corset company, and they began a relationship. No one's a traveling salesman. Every time a man is a traveling salesman in any kind of story, that's a lie, and he has a secret family. Totally. Or you are the secret family. Yes, that is correct. No. He is a genuine traveling salesman, but he also is married with a child when

they meet. Oh, to be fair, so is she. I wasn't going to mention that first. Talk about that now. I'm so sorry. No, I love it. Cause it's always, they always say I'm a traveling salesman, but really it's just that they have a family.

And I'm not going to get out to a job in Baltimore again. They have to have a good excuse to not be around for a little while. Jeez, there's a lot of sales in Baltimore. Yeah, for corsets. But really their family lives like four suburbs. Yeah. So, Grey wore alish spectacles. He sounds like he was, or at least very much portrayed as a very meek man.

Alish spectacles, weighed just 120 120 pounds and he called Ruth mummy. Oh, yuck. What the fuck? 120 pounds. Yeah, let's figure out what 120 pounds is, sorry, because I'm seeing some alish glasses at a meek man. Am I alish? Because those glasses are.

This man's thinner than I. He's 54 kilos. Oh, that's your comedy weight. Yes. I'm about eight kilos smaller than that these days. That's not a bad thing, Dave. I know it is, honestly. It's much healthier. Yeah, that's that's very healthy. I figured out my esophagus and I can eat better now.

It's a healthy range. But he he. So like, what the fuck is the point of having an affair with this meek little loser? What? You've just said it looks like me. I didn't say that. I just said round glasses and a thin little meek little loser. What? You've just said it looks like me. I didn't say that. I just said round glasses and a fit little meek loser. That's all we've said. And I said, that's you. And who would have an affair with you is my question.

Well, I think some would argue. It's hard to know why for sure. And if this is all exactly how it happened. But like she was she was sort of driving this relationship a bit more. It's how it's portrayed. That could be her type. Yeah. It's just not my type.

He is younger. I'm like a man's man. Yeah, yeah. You like Albert Schneider. Oh, yeah. Motorboat editor. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Who sort of sulks on his boat.

I'd treat him good. He's named a boat after me. I'd look after him. That's nice. So also, Dave, do you relate to this? He was also a Sunday school teacher, sang in the church choir. La la la la. Fundraise for the Red Cross.

And like Jess guessed, was happily married with a 10 year old daughter. He's not that happily if you're fucking around. Yeah. Oh, he's so happy. What? He's a piece of shit. A tiny little piece of shit that I could probably throw.

I could pick him up and throw him. Do you think he, do you think like Ruth saying he was involved? Uh, no, is my guess. Or, yeah, no, I'm going to say no. I think Ruth's, I think Ruth, she's evil. Because he's a very, he's a small guy. Certainly no giant Italian man, as she implied. When police caught up with him, he was able to provide a watertight alibi, placing him

300 miles away in Syracuse. In fact, he was still there at the Hotel Onondaga. Onondaga? When the cops caught up with him. When they accused him of being involved in the murder, he was incredulous. He wasn't a murderer. He'd never even received a speeding ticket. Never even heard of murder.

That's not the same thing. What the fuck are you talking about? I've murdered before on the record. I've done time, but never sped. Always leave the scene very slowly. If somebody is accusing you of drag racing and you say, no, that's ridiculous. I've never even got a speeding ticket. That is in the same realm.

That makes a bit more sense. I think I've never even got a speeding ticket. What are you talking about? I think he's you know, sometimes I say I've never even had a library phone. I don't I'm a good boy. I never do anything wrong. Yeah, like Dave. Good boy.

And he also said besides, I've been at this hotel all weekend and, you know, there's witnesses, people have seen me, you know, ask anyone. Ask anyone. Hey, have you seen this man? I'm sorry. I'm just checking in. Okay. Fine. Ask someone else. Anyone else here? Bad example. Okay. So the cops go, all right, they, do you mind if we search the room? He's like, fine. So they searched the room. Oh, don't tell me they also found the jewels that were also under her bed. Somehow under his bed as well.

Yeah, they'd been moved. She quickly moved them in time. No, but the police found a train ticket that showed Grey had in fact gone back to New York City in time to commit the murder. Oh, what is this people? That's right, he left a key bit of evidence right there in his hotel room, waste paper basket.

He's like, all right, get rid of that evidence. Whip it up, chuck it in a public bin. Yeah, don't take it all the way home. Like he had to put that in his pocket. Like leave the train station, chuck it in the bin then. We got a couple of hapless crooks here. Was Albert Rich or something? Not particularly. What the fuck's in it for this guy? I'm just thinking, you know, like, get rid of him, get his money. I'm thinking maybe that's the motivation. Because you're already married. It's not like you're killing him so you can marry her unless you're going to kill your

family too, which is maybe the plan. I don't know. What the fuck is wrong? But like, what's the motive for him? Yeah. Hmm. It can't be that you love Ruth. She sounds like a psycho.

Well when confronted with the ticket, Grey confessed as well. Courtney Bryson, upon learning that Mrs. Snyder was blaming him for everything, he hotly insisted that she was the mastermind and had blackmailed him into cooperating by threatening to expose his faithlessness to his loving wife. It was clear that he and Mrs. Snyder were not going to be friends again. Like from, they've gone like hot, passionate love affair. Soon as they've been, like their plan got foiled so quickly,

like either within hours or a couple of days, depending on who you read, but they instantly are like, it's off. He did it, he did it. And they're just pointing the finger at each other. It's a bit like how our friendship started. Yeah. Really hot and heavy.

It's in the reverse actually, cause we were fingering each other. Nah, that didn't work. Um, I was meant to say that we were, started like we were accusing each other, but I accidentally did the fingering thing again. Which made it weird. You keep accidentally fingering.

What are these things like? Keep them to yourself, mate. Like I'm just sort of gesticulating with my eyes. Oh, not again. Oh, not again. So, yeah, this investigation was so... The cops arrived and they're like, this is confusing. Then so quickly, the crime unraveled and they're like, oh. This is actually really easy. This is quite an easy one.

This is actually boring for us. Yeah. I'm not really having to investigate much. It seems to be actually quite easy. Well, it was kind of novel. I'll talk about it soon, but things didn't get solved that much back then. Right. So this was pretty novel and America soon became obsessed with the case. This is in part due to it being a golden age for newspapers, as well as the recent rise of the tabloid newspaper. Apparently it had been big in England for maybe 25 years or something. Oh, they do tabloids well. And no one had really thought to do it in America until a couple of guys from a big media family

served time in England and they're like, oh, these papers are really popular over here. And they brought them back. And they started one up in New York and then they became really popular. According to Bryson, tabloids focused on crime, sport and celebrity gossip. And in doing so gave all three an importance considerably beyond any they'd enjoyed before. This is what I found really interesting. I kind of always assumed crime would have been a big focus in newspapers. But a study in 1927 showed that tabloids devoted between a quarter and a third of their space to crime reports, up to 10 times more than the serious papers did. Isn't that wild?

Wow. So before, like tabloids really changed the game, according to Bill Bryson, it was because of their influence that the quiet but messy murder of a man like Albert Snyder could become national news. So it's just a bit of a timing thing as well. You know, tabloids were selling so many copies that it became a point of concern for traditional newspaper publications. And according to Bryson, most of these, the traditionals, responded by becoming conspicuously more like tabloids themselves. Even the New York Times found room for plenty of juicy stories throughout the decade and covered them with prose that was often nearly as feverish. So now when a murder like that

of Albert Snyder came along, the results, the result across all newspapers was something like a frenzy. So it's just they become obsessed with it and which is, yeah, it's all pretty wild. This possibly had something to do with the fact that the perpetrators were so inept at crime that they were caught not only quickly, but at all. Yeah. Because like I was saying, that wasn't the norm at the time. Yeah. Like.

So it was actually pretty easy to get away with it. That was just really bad. Yes, exactly. How embarrassing. It's so embarrassing. And yeah, I think that is, that is, there is an appeal to the general public of hapless criminals. I mean, we've, we love a hapless crook.

Yeah. So yeah, the fact that they've been caught so easily, just like the first sign of pressure, they've done a bad job of covering it up. And the first question, they just go, yeah, right. I did it. Yeah. It was me. And I'll tell you who else did it. Yeah. So you can jail them as well. Because it's like I think probably at both ends, it's the really mysterious ones,

the ones where people want to crack it. There's all these clues and they can't figure out, you know, the Zodiac Killer or the Jack the Ripper and those sort of things. People become obsessed with that side of it. There's that murder in the hotel room and nobody could figure it out. And yeah. Whereas this one, it's one of the rare ones where they're like, oh, we know the characters and we can go back through their life stories and we can, you know, it's like a soap opera

playing out, which is, you know, it's a, yeah. And quite a new thing at this point because newspapers would normally go all in like this. But yeah, Bryson sort of breaks down some of the numbers about how crimes didn't get solved that much at the time, writing, New York recorded 372 murders in 1927. In 115 of those cases, no one was arrested. Where arrests were made, the conviction rate was less than 20%. So about two thirds or so, a bit more,

there was an arrest, but only 20% of those ended up. So it was like quite a small portion of murderers got done for, assuming that they were correctly convicted. Yeah. Nationally, according to a survey made by the Metropolitan Life Insurance Company, two thirds of America's murders were unsolved in 1927. Two thirds. Chicago in a typical year experienced between 450 and 500 murders and managed to solve far fewer than a quarter of them. Altogether, nine tenths of all serious crime in America went

unpunished according to the survey. Bryson also points out, it's interesting that the best data he could find from that time was from an insurance company, not from any police records. They didn't even keep good data. Yeah. So the fact that the killers confessed, and then all the sorted details were there for the media to sift through, and on top of the fact

that I was starting to realise that crime coverage helped sell papers meant that the media really went to town on this story. They just went all in. The case took up more space in papers than any other crime of the decade and wasn't overtaken until the kidnapping of Lindbergh's baby in 1935. So it's interesting. It was a crime or trial of the century. Yeah. This was, and I'll mention it later, but this was also referred to as the crime of the century, even though it's kind of like a dull, not dull, but it's just like, you know,

two people that no one had heard of. Yeah. It was a really sloppily done murder and all that sort of stuff. But because of the attention it got. Does sound a bit like if they had to shut the hell up, they probably still could have got away with it. Because back then they couldn't get anyone for anything. Yeah. Just hide the jewels better. Yeah.

Mess up your bed a little bit. What the fuck is wrong with you? Get rid of the train ticket. Yeah, that one. Like throw it out in the bin as soon as you get off the train. Nobody's going to find that then. Because like they were in a time where no CCTV footage, no DNA, no fingerprints. You don't have to do much.

You just don't have to tell on yourself. Oh, so stupid. But anyway, I think it's good that murderers got caught. You know, I think that's true. Yeah, I like that that happened. I still think they might have been framed. Yes. Yeah. Like, who's this silly? Exactly. It's so stupid that no one would have done it.

Yeah. According to Bryson, a journalist named Silas Bent made a careful measurement of column inches and found that the Snyder-Gray affair received more coverage than the sinking of the Titanic. That's unbelievable. Isn't it? Because it's like one of these, the Titanic is still, will be forever, you know, world famous. Yes. Or at least, you know, in our lifetimes. Do you think the movie helped?

I think the movie probably did help, but I'd heard of it before that. Yeah, still. And also, this is one person dying on the Titanic, it's like over 700 people dying, all with different backstories, and a lot of famous people died too, very wealthy, well-known people. Yeah. And then people with family and friends on there, of course. It's amazing that this would have more intrigue.

Yeah. Yeah. Because I like, it just hasn't hung around as a big story, right? Because I'd never heard of it. Had you either heard of it? No. I don't think it's particularly famous anymore, but I'll mention a bit later on that it did inspire a bunch of like crime fiction and stuff as well. But anyway, wild stuff.

More coverage than Titanic blew my mind. That's amazing. So they were arrested and it all happened pretty quickly. They were put on trial a little over a month later. Apparently justice was swift back then. Yeah, especially if you're like, yeah, I did it. Yeah. Okay, I did it. All right.

All the media coverage led to an almost festive atmosphere at the Queens County Courthouse. Joy to the world. It's bizarre. According to Bryson, 130 newspapers from across the nation and as far afield as Norway sent reporters. Western Union installed the biggest switchboard it had ever built, bigger than any used for a presidential convention or world series. Outside the courthouse, lunch wagons set up along the curb

and souvenir sellers sold tie pins in the shape of sash weights for 10 cents each. The murder weapon. That's fucked. Isn't that like that's crazy. When I said festive, you're like, oh, you're over. You're overselling that. Food trucks are turning up. It's food trucks and souvenirs. Yeah. That's wild. It's a festival.

People are doing bootleg merch. Yeah. Buy the murder weapon. That's amazing. So strange. Here's the train ticket that you should have thrown away. Oh. Yeah, just really odd.

Everything about this story is hard to get in my head around. Yeah. But there were so many people turning up to witness the proceedings during the three week trial that many had to be turned away. And apparently, rather than heading home, they just stand outside and just sort of like huddle around. You know, it feels like it's the World Cup or... Yeah, or they watch it on the big screen. Yeah, exactly. I mean, there was no big screen. Bill Bryson talks about it like they were staring at the building, just imagining

what was happening inside. Just happy to know that they were near it. Hey, what do you think's happening in there right now? Yeah. People are so weird. I know. But like, you know, you look at some of the things humans do and you go, that's we're like, we're so funny and silly and cute sometimes.

And then other times you're like, what the fuck are you doing? Let's just stand outside a building where something might be happening. Yeah. What are you doing? Go touch grass. I think, I think about all the time you said to me years ago, you're like, isn't it, it's so weird. You, you met, you made it the point about money.

It's like, this is just made up. We evolved from monkeys and eventually we start saying this paper means something. Yeah. from monkeys and eventually we start saying this paper means something. Yeah. And I always had that thought when I was at, over the summer I was about to, I was lining up to on Dodgem cars at a fair. I'm like, this is what we've done with our big brains. Oh my God, yes.

It's so weird. So weird. I was, as I, I always think about this late at night. I was just the other night, I was lying in bed and we were talking about whether we thought there was like, you know, life out there. And I was like, we can't possibly be the only planet ever to have like sustained life. And this is all we've done with it. Like we live in a little box and we pay all this tax and who the fuck thought of roads and what are we doing? You know, I was like, this is, this is the best it can be. That's

so weird. Anyway, it's a great thing to think this is the best it can be. That's so weird. Anyway, it's a great thing to think about right before you go to bed. Just an existential dread of like, is this it? Living in a little box. We've made it all up. Money's just made up. But we're bloody, we're bloody governed by it, aren't we? It's just so funny to think like, you drive to a place to go and be in pretend little cars that bump into each other. What am I doing? Yeah.

I could just crash into cars in my actual car. I got here in a real car. Yeah. It is strange. So it was like video games. Like what am I doing? So much of me playing The Sims is me like. You recreate your life on there, don't you?

I recreate my life. Like every time I'm like, I'm going to do something crazy this time. And then I always end up like, they just, they find someone, they get married, they have some kids, they never go on holiday. They can, but they don't. And they just- Why do you let them go on holiday? I just, I'm too focused on them getting promotions.

Yes. I mean- Or like raising the kids, cause that actually takes a fair bit of work. This is just life. It's so sad. It's so fun how it's life, but you- You can do literally anything. But isn't it funny that you, you left that kind of life yourself, but when you're playing

a fantasy game, you're putting yourself back into it. Yeah. Gotta get that. Well, you can't, there isn't like a podcasting career on The Sims, so otherwise. But how many separate farming games do you? I would think about you leaving radio, but yeah, that's true. It's sort of this, you left even like before that, you're working in big corporations, but I guess Triple J is part of a big.

Yeah. I had like, I had office jobs. But there was like, there's a ladder and you're like, oh, I'm not going to do that anymore in all your jobs. And you're just floating around there. What am I doing? Basically in the bumper cars of life. Oh, don't worry.

The thing that ties you down is your sims job in the accounting firm. And if they keep working really hard, they might not get looked over for promotion this time. Okay? They have to go home and play chess to increase their logic skill so they can get a promotion. They're like, I just want to go to bed or go on a holiday. No, you have to play chess for eight hours to get the skill up. It's very sad. But is it no more fun for you to go on holiday with them? Of course it is.

No, you go with them. Oh, that's fun. You can go to the beach, you can go to the snow. It's lovely. You can go on the Dodgeham car. Jess, can you go home tonight and give them a fucking holiday? Yeah, give them a holiday. Please. They're trapped in the machine.

What a sad life. Mine, I mean. They're doing fine. They're doing great. So yeah, so. So what caused this breakdown in us? Uh, people are standing outside a courtroom imagining what's happening in there. Everything's made up. They're buying little murder weapon souvenirs and, um, you know, and a hot dog.

Couple of murders in there, allegedly. Oh, they've admitted it. I got extra mustard. Ha ha ha. Wild. So if you were lucky enough to score a seat on any given day, and apparently like notable people from, you know, like aristocracy and the highfalutin and actors

and all these sorts of celebrities would go in and sit in and watch the court cases. Nearly all the names I didn't recognise, but you know, they were- You want to be on a media list for that one. Yeah. Can you get me into that trial? What's wrong with you people? And then you sit there. Well, you sit there, you take it all in and then you're also rewarded at the end of each day.

With a free hatpin. By being able to go up and inspect the murder weapons. So at the end of the trial, at the end of each day, everyone in there could go, you know, form a line. Go have a look. Go have a look. Oh, there's the sash weight. There's the wire. There's the chloroform cloth, which they was involved as well.

What the hell? What the hell? You do a little like- Yeah, that's interesting. Little excursion. Yeah, it's sort of like, yeah, it's like a little museum. What a strange time. But I mean, I sort of, I get it at the same time, like we're talking about it because

it is interesting, but it's, I don't know, sometimes it feels like it's distance that makes it less full on. It just feels like poor taste. We got nearly a hundred years of space, but. I mean, I am reflecting on the time that in Scotland we went to the Anatomy Museum just so we could look at a book. We went along with you because you wanted to. I did not want to.

I did not like that book. You wanted to go there though. That place spooked me. I like it. No, I just, there was an Irish pub around the corner Dave. I said I'll meet you there. And he said, you'll come along right now. We went to a cafe after that.

Anyway, it was a book made of skin belonging to Burke and or hair. And I looked at that and I did feel a bit weird about it. So maybe these people, these celebrities are also feeling the same thing. Looking at the thing. Oh, I don't know what I expected to feel. Yeah, I think I do remember being like, Hey, I guess that'd be interesting. And then getting there and being like, I don't like this place. I don't like that book. That's gross.

Uh, but yeah, there's something fascinating about the concept. Yeah. And then you get there and you think, Oh, I mean all of this. Yeah. It's all very contradictory things where I'd be like, Oh, I feel weird about this. I feel conflicted, but I am also fascinated. And yeah, it's a, which I guess true crime stuff is so popular. Yeah. Cause like there's just like a, a human interest in this stuff, whatever reason. Yeah. Anyway, let's get into what was revealed during the court proceedings, apart from what I've already told you, cause a lot of the story I've told you did come out. The extra details I've been telling you about came out in the court proceedings.

Sure. There are no big twists or anything, so let me tell you that straight up, but I'll fill you in on some of the extra details. So as we know, Ruth and Albert were not enjoying a happy marriage. Divorce was legal and not even uncommon in New York in the 20s. All the same, Ruth decided to murder him instead. It was less paperwork. I'd kill you instead of like, um, leaving the podcast.

I just killed her. It's because I'm the problems that you can get to keep going. Is that the problem? Yeah. Okay. Um, I can be very happy without you. Yeah. Well, if I had the choice, I would rather just leave the podcast and get murdered, to be honest.

I would just, yeah, I want to go on the record and say that was a joke and I would never, ever murder you. Ever. Great. And Matt's silence is deafening. You're going to kill us both. So yeah, it was becoming more common. Like it wasn't common, but it was becoming a more common divorce. According to Business Insider, in the next couple of years, there are about 200,000

divorces in the US. So, you know, it wasn't like there's no way out of this marriage. It wasn't super taboo. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, Ruth decided to go in a different direction. Well, Ruth, you know, she walks to the bit of her own drum. The plan really got going when she was able to get Albert to sign. You were talking about Moda before she got able to get Albert to sign, you were talking about Moda before, she got Albert to sign or some places safe that she forged, but a life insurance policy with a double indemnity clause. This is a term I've heard a bit, never

knew what it meant, but apparently, do you know what it means? No. Oh yeah, but please tell me. For the listeners who may not know. It's basically, it's a lot. So when a life insurance policy will pay out twice the value, if the death results from an unnatural or accidental death or murder type death rather than a health problem, that's what a double indemnity is.

So in this case, it would have paid out if he died, you know, of natural causes, it would have paid out 48 grand, but the double indemnity clause meant it would pay out nearly a hundred grand. If it was murder. If it was murder, say, or, you know, he fell off a cliff or whatever. That's a really, really bad model.

What a strange model. To include murder. Yeah, that's right. But then I suppose, yeah, if he's murdered by someone else. Yeah, stranger or whatever that is, why it makes sense. Or if he does fall off a cliff or get hit by a train or something. Yeah. But why double anyway? Why double? Just you can make it a bit more.

But either way, is it, I mean, is that paying extra for the extra trauma or? I don't know. It's interesting. Yeah, it's not that it feels not super thought through. I guess it's because it's like they they look at the maths of it all and go, well, most people die from a health condition. Not that many people on paper get murdered or fall off a cliff so they can afford to pay out more for those sort of things.

And they charge more for that premium. And if you know, like, well, if I'm going to die of a health thing, it's probably when I'm 75 years old, so I don't need to provide for my family. But if I get murdered, I could be, you know, 36 or whatever he was. Yeah, 44. So I need to keep, I need you need to behave a bit more. So I think. And they got a nine year old. But yeah.

You want to make sure the kid's okay. It does feel, I'm hoping that there's some sort of clause where if you are found to be the murderer, you don't get the money. That is correct. Yes. Okay, great. Because that would really otherwise be a bit dodgy. But still you would go for like contract killers and hope that doesn't come back to you

and stuff like that. There's other ways. Oh boy. It's funny. Or there, there was a bit of a hit maybe on Netflix, uh, uh, like a Netflix movie about a hit man, maybe called hit man. Yes. And I brought in the promotion of that, the, maybe the actor or someone's talking

about it, like they don't really exist in the real world. Yeah. Hitman, which I'm like, is that true? Yeah. But apparently because of fiction and stuff, people just think there are people out there you can pay. I'm like, it does seem weird. Five grand? Your puddings. Yeah.

You're risking a lot. Yeah. In America, certain states, you're literally risking your own life. Yeah. And I guess you are risking your life when you're taking a weapon and kill someone, it could go wrong. But yeah, but anyway, apparently that's all just a bit of a myth. Yeah. And so I watched that movie and they do, they say that in the movie and I was still like, nah, that's not true. They must be real. Of course they say that. Of course they want us to say that. They want us to think they're

aren't hit men, but there are hit men. Yeah. So then I don't expect a hit man. I mean, who's Jason Statham? Yeah. Yeah. What, you think Jason Statham just exists in the world? Yeah, acting or whatever. Come on. Whatever, mate. So yeah, a hundred grand about, 98, a hundred grand.

That's a lot in the 20s, that's a lot now. It's up towards two million today. Whoa. Right. So the next step was for him to be killed. Oh. so step one, got the either forged or got him to sign, kicked him into signing a finger. Yeah, this would be good. Well, I'll do one too.

We'll both do it. So using the sash weight wasn't her first option. Not by a long shot. Apparently the successful attempt was her seventh or eighth. She'd been trying for a year or so. To kill him. To kill him, yep. Oh, wow.

He hadn't realized she was trying to kill him? Yeah, exactly. I'm not sure who that's more embarrassing for. I think, honestly, I think it's actually her because she's doing such a bad job. He doesn't even know he's being murdered. Like a gun goes off. He's like, oh, sorry, did you hear something? Yeah, I dropped something.

Sorry, I dropped the stapler. He did his shoelace off at the time. Oh, great. Not again. It's so embarrassing that she's been trying to kill him all this time, but she just can't kill him. Love, I'm going to have to bloody sue Suzuki. Just went out to the car, the brakes were cut.

Can you believe it? We had a service three months ago. Luckily, I was able to roll it to a stop up a hill. And those bloody buffoons down at Suzuki, tell you what. She's like, they'll be hearing a lot from me. So as I learnt, I think last year on Great Australian Murder Mystery Comedy Deadlock, women kill with poison. And this is how she tried the first seven or eight times.

She tried rat poison, suggesting it would help his hiccups. I'm guessing she probably decanted it first. All right, it wasn't like take this little- Take this rat poison. Yeah. That'll help your hiccups. She crushed sleeping pills into his nightly whiskey, even tried gassing him.

So she was trying different kinds of poison. My God. So I think like he got violently ill at times, but he never died. He was just, he just would not go down. He's invincible. Yeah. There's been a couple of, it was reminding me of, was it Michael Malloy? Maybe Jess or Dave?

Yeah, yeah. That's where they kept poisoning him and he just keep turning under the bar. He was like being hit by a truck. Yeah, and he'd walk back in and they're like, what the hell? And you did a live episode about an unkillable soldier? Yeah. Unkillable soldier, yeah, he was shot like eight times. So yeah, he's, this guy's the third in the trilogy of unkillable. Well, eventually he was killable.

I mean, they all died at some point. That's right, they're all dead now. Yeah, they're not actually invincible, but they really, they, what's the word? Escaped death a few times. Yes. Depending on, on the way you look at it,, they're not actually invincible, but they really, they, they, what's the word? Escaped death a few times. Yes. Depending on on which one of the two you spoke to during the trial. One was doing, you know, driving all of this poisoning. Please, Ruth's driving it. Yeah. Yeah. She's saying, no, Judd, grow. He sent me poison in the mail telling me to try that.

And he's like, oh, no, I didn't. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, More likely to be the poison killer as well. Because I'm not going to go in there and wrestle someone. You're going to overpower someone. Exactly. Unless it's like a small cat. The way he tells it. Even then. Claws. Yeah.

The way he tells it, she was suggesting we've got to kill him for ages. We got to kill him and he's like, that'd be crazy. Don't let's not do that. And eventually she sort of wore him down. That's how he tells it. Women, am I right? Oh my God. Nath.

They will wear you down. Honestly. Honestly, just at some point it just becomes easy to just agree and go along with it. Even I'll bloody shut you out. You're waiting at the end of it. Let me tell ya. So together they planned the perfect crime

as far as they thought anyway. But as we already know, they, yeah, it wasn't quite perfect. It was a shit crime. Grey took the train to Syracuse where he checked into the hotel, making himself very conspicuous. Hello! It is I, John Grey! I'm here checking in. It is I, Judd Gray! And I'm gonna go-

Wahahaha! You're twirling a fake mustache. I'm just going to go up to my room and stay there for 24 hours straight. Could I have room service? Fake mustache is such a funny detail for someone trying to be remembered. No, you didn't- no, he doesn't- The girl we saw had a mustache. Yeah.

Fuck, fuck. It is I, Judd Gray, checking in all weekend. He's certainly not going back to New York. Oh my God, I need a break. From the Big Apple. He's honking a fake nose. Honk honk. He's spraying water at the receptionist.

He's like, nipple? He dresses as a clown. Nipple? From where you're holding it? Yeah. Trying to get on stage with the magician. He's like, tating. Trying to be the stage with a magician that night. He's like dating. Trying to be the volunteer from the audience.

Oh, hello volunteer. Everyone here, see me. Hello, I'm Judd. Judd Gray. Judd Gray, that's what they call me. It's my name. It's my name and? I certainly haven't just bludgeoned someone to death with a paperweight.

So yeah, he's like, people will remember me. I made a big splash. People will remember. I was fucking rude. I asked to speak to three different managers. So then you're like, that's in his mind. But then you remember he's like this real meek man. Yeah. And it flashes back and he's like, um, he knocks over like a paperweight on the receptionist.

Yeah, they'll remember that. Yeah. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,

oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, So he checks in. He can't even see over the desk. He's so short. I'm sorry, sir. Is this our little boy? Were you saying something? Do you need help finding your parents? Well, he's trying to make a scene. Someone comes through the front door and the breeze blows him away. Blows him off course.

So, yeah, he makes a big scene, then he slips out quietly, heads back to the city, back to New York City. And he obviously made sure he held on all train tickets for evidence to be used against him later. For tax deductions. According to Bryson, while he was away, he arranged for a friend to go to his hotel room, must the bed and otherwise make it look as if the room had been occupied. So he had some clever ideas as well. What was the word there? Must?

Must, which I think is interesting. Must the bed. Like mess, I guess. Must or Musk. Like get in there and make Must. Must, which I think is interesting. Must the bear. Like a mess, I guess. Must or Musk, like getting there and making it stink. Like someone's slept in it. Musk up that bear. Yeah, Musk got a real good. Is must like past tense of mess?

Maybe. Must it up. Must it up. He also left the friend with letters to mail after his departure. His alibi securely in place. Grey then obviously went to Queen's Village. According to a writer Troy Taylor, who's written a book about a few murder trials and whatnot, when he arrived,

he walked around for an hour stopping under streetlights to take drinks from his flask. It was almost as if he hoped to be spotted and arrested for breaking the law because he was drinking in public and it was during prohibitions. Right. So the way Taylor is selling it is like he's gone. I don't know if it's a real shame if I got busted before I arrived at the scene to kill someone. Yeah, like he's trying to be bailed out by the cops for doing a smaller crime. Oh my God, he's so scared of Ruth. And he gets out of Ruth. He's so pathetic. I'm sorry. I just got busted.

It's not my fault. It's not my fault. I'm a bad boy. This is what happens. Get used to it. I looked up must and it's to make someone's hair or clothing untidy or messy. The wind was musing up his hair. He was must by the wind.

He was blowing around this guy. Same as like ruffle or the cheville. This guy lives must. Oh my god. Completely must. He's just musing from place to place. Oh no, I've been must Well, you know, there's little willy willies that have like little bits of litter in it

Willy willy must sound very strange. Yeah, is that an Australian thing? Willy willy? I think it is anyway Like a little like a tiny little sock tornado But no one paid attention to him, unfortunately is anyway. Like a little like a tiny little cycle tornado. But no one paid attention to him, unfortunately. And finally he had to enter the Snyder home. This is still with Taylor. He came in through the back door as he and Ruth had planned. The Snyder family was away at a party and would return late. Judd promised to hide in a spare room

where Ruth had left the window wait. Also rubber gloves and chloroform, all the tools of murder. The family returned around 2 a.m. and Ruth opened the bedroom door a crack. Are you in there, bud, dear? She whispered. So his nickname for her was mummy or mumsy. Oh, sorry.

And hers for him were bud or lover boy Love a boy and mum's he's so fun is so patronizing but hey, all right, bud You're good, but he calls her mummy mummy or mumsy. Yes, mommy. Yeah Yeah, strange old relationship. Yeah Dave can you suck on me mommy? I hate it, Dave. Can you call me Mummy? I hate it.

I'm changing my name in the group, Jeff. Loverboy, can you call me Mummy? You've got to call me Loverboy. Sure thing, Bud. Bud, so patronising. And she said, are you in there, buddy boy? Whatever. Hey, hey, little buddy.

Yeah, she said, are you in there, bud, dear? Mummy. What's up for the murder? Can mummy get you a drink? She's saying that into a room. in their bud, dear. Mummy. What's it for the murder? Can mummy get you a drink? She's saying that into a room. Taylor makes it sound all pretty messed up, I guess. I mean, it is messed up.

It's a murder. But so he continues saying she soon returns after saying, are you in their bud? Then she returned back to the spare room wearing only a slip and the two had sex with her husband asleep just down the hallway. Finally after about an hour, Greg grabbed the window sash away.

An hour? Oh my god! Okay, we might have been wrong about Greg. This man's a stud. Hell yeah brother! That's my bud! Now you're starting to see a connection between you and him. Yeah, I can see why it's called Loverboy.

My goodness! Yeah, Al the see why it's called Loverboy. My goodness. Yeah, Owl. The night owl. Up all night long. And he's still calling him Mumsy. Yeah. Oh Mumsy. So after the hour, Greg grabs the window sash weight and Ruth led him to the master bedroom

where Albert Snyder slept with the blankets up over his head, which is a weird detail. It's a weird way to sleep. Too hot. That's very hot. Taylor continues, the two of them stood on opposite sides of the bed and then Grey raised the sash weight and brought it down clumsily onto Snyder's head. The weak blow merely glanced off the man's skull. Oh no.

And while stunned, he let out a roar and tried to seize his attacker. Apparently, basically it hit him so soft it just woke him up. Like he's being tapped on the head. Oh my God. Cause he does, it's from, I mean, I'm still not entirely sure that

where the truth lies. Yeah. But this seems to be the main story that's come out of it. He's this sort of weak guy, doesn't really want to do what he's like, but he's doing it, she's saying, telling him to, and you know, he just sort of, eh. He's so pathetic, but an absolute dynamo in the same way. Oh my god, crazy. I mean, he can barely lift his arms off. He's spent all his energy, my goodness.

He's been going off down the hall. That's horrific. You'll hate this, Jess. So he's he's glanced Albert's head with the weight. Woke an Albert up. Albert's gone trying to grab Judd. And Judd became terrified, letting out a whining scream, Mumsy, Mumsy, for God's sake, help. Oh, disgusting.

What a fucking loser. What an absolute loser. I can't even murder properly. Mumsy. Yuck. From there, apparently, Ruth took the weight and finished off the job with one blow. Of course she did. Because Ruth is a girl boss.

Ruth gets shit done. She's a psycho, but, you know, she gets results. Yes. You remember how you said that the paperweight was not the first choice of weapon? Sash weight. I don't know what it is. Sorry, I keep saying paperweight because it's something I've actually heard of. The sash weight. But then it ended up sounds like it was the first thing that they bashed him with. Was she thinking about trying a hammer or something else?

Oh no, all the poison. Sorry. I'm with yes. Yes. Like it's a big sort of- Jess is showing us a picture of it. I'm guessing you'd say what a sash weight is, yeah. Like a bit pretty solid. Almost like a stick of dynamite size thing, but of metal. But just solid metal. Yeah, solid metal.

And then I imagine that there's like a little ring, like metal attachment to attach to the curtain. So you'd probably grip it like that and just like nunchuck onto his head. Yes, whereas you're picturing Gray doing like a Mr. Burns thrashing of a lifetime. Yes. Yes. Oh, he's so pathetic. Oh, Mumsy. Mumsy, for God's sake.

Oh, help me. For God's sake, please. I'm frightened. Yuck. So yes, she kills her husband with one blow, supposedly. Then, according to Bryson, she and Grey then stuffed chloroform up Snyder's nostrils and strangled him with picture wire, which she had also laid in. So I don't know, like really making sure of it, I guess.

They then turned out drawers and cupboards all over the house to make it look as if it had been ransacked. It appears not to have occurred to either of them that it would have been a good idea to make Ruth's bed look slept in. So this is one of the big oversights. Oh my god, Ruth. Grey loosely tied Ruth around the ankles and wrists and arranged her comfortably on the floor.

In what he considered his most cunning touch, Grey left the Italian newspaper on the table downstairs so that the police would conclude that the intruders were alien subversives. It was like a big thing at the time where Italian anarchists were up to no good. And I think some of that was real, but it also gave people this little boogie man that they could go, obviously this was some- Obviously it was an Italian. Yeah.

That's strange. When everything was in place, Grey kissed Ruth goodbye, then caught a taxi into the city and a train back to Syracuse. Apparently that taxi driver, he gave a really bad tip and the taxi driver also came forward

to the cops guy. Yeah. Yeah, that's the guy. Yeah, I definitely drove him back. He's a real tight ass. Yeah, like apparently because of the tight ass tip, he was like, yeah, I'll talk in court, whatever. No worries, I'll make up stuff, what do I solve the murder?

I just want to do it. Whatever, use the machete. Yeah, is that what? No, you tell me what you want to say. I'll say it. Because people that don't tip me, they deserve jail. They deserve to die. Because that is the, if they get done for it, that is the punishment.

Wow. Really, death penalty is very much on the table. Yes. Back to Taylor, minutes after Grey left, Ruth began banging on Lorraine's door, their daughter. The child ran out, I mean, just on top of everything else. They're doing this with- A nine year old.

A nine year old, you know, just down the hall. So her daughter ran out, removed the gag from her mother's mouth. She told her to get help and Lorraine ran next door to the neighbour's house where the police were called. And this takes us back to the beginning with Ruth telling the police that a giant speaking a foreign language had knocked her out. Right. And she'd been asleep or unconscious for six hours. Yeah, that's right. Apparently, I think during the whole thing, part of that six hours, her and Grace sat in the lounge room having a drink and chatting about the plan a bit more.

What if you woke up during any of that? I think, yeah, strange. Come downstairs. Hey, there's a lot of noise. Oh, hello. Who are you? I think I think they'd killed him by the time they were having a drink. Killed him, went down to drink. What do we do next? Have sex for another hour.

Should we have another sex session? I'm definitely up for it. Because I got heaps to give. Yeah. I got heaps to give. Have sex for another hour. Oh my God. Should we have sex for another hour?

Should we kill an hour by having sex? So in court, Snyder and Grey had separate lawyers representing them and both placed the blame with the other. Snyder and her lawyer claimed that Grey was the driving force. In return, Grey's lawyer laid it on so thick. Here's a quote from him. His client had been duped by a quote, designing deadly, conscious-less abnormal woman, a human serpent, a human fiend in the disguise of a woman. A human fiend? A human fiend. In the disguise of a woman.

A human fiend in the disguise of a woman. So women aren't humans? So weird. A human fiend in the disguise of a woman. It's like a babushka doll sort of thing. Yeah, imagine a human, but a woman. What are you talking about? That's so weird.

So yeah, all of- You've got time to prepare, like write something down. There is part of me that like, I mean, who knows without being there, but some of it I'm like, they've laid it on so thick, she's the devil. I'm like, how much, where's the truth here? But obviously I don't think she's a good person. No, I think she's awful.

The public's appetite for the trial was so large that even interesting side notes were reported. This is some of my favorite stuff from the whole story. For instance, they could read in the paper about how the judge was a dog lover. When he got home each night from court, he greeted his 125 pet dogs and personally fed them all. Personally fed them all. 125 dogs. Like you two are dog people. That's, is that a lot of dogs?

Yeah, that's a few. That's too many dogs. That's about 124 too many dogs. That's a full time gig.'s about 124 too many dogs. That's a full time gig. I'm watching the dog balls. I know this is probably pre like pet insurance and stuff. Because sometimes I think it would be really nice to get Goose a friend.

And then I remember that his pet insurance is more expensive than my health insurance, twice the amount. And I think we could double that again and get another one. Nah, that's okay. What if you get double indemnity? Double indemnity paid insurance. Double dog indemnity. Okay, what's too many dogs? I think, I think- Is it north or south of 125, firstly?

South. South of 125. I think 10 is insane. Yeah. 120, yeah, you're right. Anything more. I can't even picture it. 10 on a farm or something.

Like that's big for a pack of dogs. Yeah. You know, wild dogs don't get around to that big of... How do you have a job? How do you have time to go be a judge? Even if you had them in like a paddock, imagine a paddock on a farm with 125 dogs. It's too many dogs.

You can't have them inside. No. I love dogs and I'd be like, that's too many and I'm scared. I think he had a big property like he is a judge. I think he's pretty well to do. He'd have to have a staff. Hmm.

Which I assume he does, the dog staff. Looking after the dogs. For what purpose? Just to have 125 dogs? And would they be breeding? Maybe that's how it got to 125. They just kept fucking. Do they know what's called it?

He started with two dogs. That's two. That's that's broken man. Or is he hoping to make some sort of coat out of them? Mr. Bernstahl. Oh yes. See my chest, see my chest. No, see my chest.

Sorry, that was a separate point. But have a look. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace, the all-in-one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online. Whether it's your first ever website or your business is expanding, Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website and engage with your audience. Sell exclusive content on your site by adding a paywall to sell memberships or courses or sell files your customers can download like PDFs, musics or ebooks.

And yes, I said musics. That's the plural of music. Also, I come from also ease books. Okay. Well, that's the plural of a book day very quickly. What, what if you have to make an ebook, what would it be about? Uh, from a to E the best ebook there is. God, he's good. He's good. I put him on the spot.

People are going to think that was in a script. It wasn't. That was improv. But if I did need it to be scripted I'd probably consult the good people at Squarespace AI because you can get help with written content on your website with this fantastic feature Squarespace AI. Generate instant personalized results that highlight your brand identity. What you do is you explain what your site is about, choose your tone and enter what you need to get short or long form text. But a bing, but a boom, Squarespace AI makes it easy to go live, stand out and succeed online. Can I just double check what identity means? And I only ask because you gave it to me before.

All right, well read about it in my new Easebook. Hey, Squarespace also has the tools you need to create and sell your own online course and customize everything with next generation editing technology. Create engaging lessons your audiences will love, then set the price in that order. You can charge a one-time fee or sell subscriptions. Take what you know and turn it into income with Squarespace courses. Okay, Matt, on the spot, what course are you teaching? Spaghetti.

Okay. I'm signing up. Head to squarespace.com slash do go on for a free trial. Add to save 10% of your first purchase of a website or domain. That's squarespace.com slash do go on. Spaghetti. Two other points in this sort of category that came out, just quirky facts that came out from the trial.

Uh, Bryson writes that one of Ruth Snyder's lawyers, Dana Wallace, merited special attention for being the son of the owner of the Mary Celeste. Oh, the infamous cargo ship found drifting in the Atlantic in 1872 with its crew mysteriously vanished which Jess did a block report on I think last year. That's right. Or Dave did. Jess is looking at me like she didn't. Mayso was on it I think.

I remember doing the episode I don't remember who did the report. I reckon Jess did it and Mayso was a guest. Quite possibly me but it's, I mean I know we've joked for a while that I don't really remember things but I'm starting to actually be a bit concerned about it. I don't, maybe it wasn't me actually, because it's not coming up at all in my... In your docs? In my Google docs. Oh my God, maybe it's me that's forgotten this time.

Oh, Matt, was it you? I'm confident it wasn't me, but we did do it though, right? I don't know. Yeah, pretty sure. Yes. Did this report disappear? Like, honestly, I know. Yeah, we joke a lot about how I don't remember anything, but I am starting to get quite concerned because Dave mentioned recently wanting to do John Dillinger and somebody told us, I've

done it. And I was like, have I? Yeah. And I looked it up and I have, but I, that was only a couple of years ago. I don't remember. Couldn't tell you a single thing about John Dillinger. I'm concerned. Yes, if people want to hear it, it was episode 370. We don't know who did it, but somebody did it.

Oh, that was a while ago then. That's like two years ago. Yeah. And John Dillinger was further back. Yeah. So it's all fine. So anyway, so yeah, that was another fun fact. And so every little- Sorry, I so yeah, that was another fun fact.

So every little- Sorry, I've just confirmed it was a Jess report. How? How did you- okay. It's in our planner. Wow. Jess did 370. But yeah, basically any sort of tangential story that they could get out of it, or your

lawyer is related to this person from an infamous story. Because people just want to read about it. The appetite was ravenous. Yes. This is probably my favorite one though, as Bryson writes. Someone else noticed and solemnly reported that the ages of the jurors exactly added up to 500.

Oh my God. Hang on a second. Plus, plus, plus, plus 500. My God. What could it mean? Why did they start adding ages together? They're like checking everything out. So imagine they've also added up like their home addresses together, like the amount of things before they went, oh my God, stop the presses.

Oh my God, between their names they have every letter except Q, X and Y. Oh my God. I think my favourite quote from all the coverage came from evangelist sister Amy Macpherson. According to Taylor, she received a large sum from the New York Evening Graphic to write up a piece on the Sorted Case, and you know, did it in a very moralising sort of way. But my favourite line, which is quoted in nearly every piece of writing about this, she pleaded with young men in her piece to say, I want a wife like mother, not a red hot cutie.

Matt. I want a wife like mother. Why are you trying to piss me off? Not a red hot cutie. Even though the killer was referred to as... Mumsy. Mumsy. But you don't want a mumsy. I think you want a red hot cutie. Yeah. The mumsy in this case is the murderer.

Yeah. She'll crush you. That sucks. She's literally a mother. Marry someone like your mum, but not a cutie. No. Cop that mum. And that's offensive to me as a cutie. Because all the, all the stories were selling her as like this hot seductress, Ruth. And yeah, there's, I don't mean, I don't need to talk about her looks or whatever, but. Bit of a fogo. No, she just looks like a normal.

I'm gonna look her up. Yeah, she just looks like a 1920s woman. I'm looking her up. I bet she's an uggo. No. What are you saying? Ruth Snyder. Is it Schneider?

S-N-Y-D-E-R. Oh my goodness, okay. I think he might have, I'm pretty sure that Albert might have anglicised it a little bit to make it seem less German. Yeah, she just looks like a... Oh yeah, that's just a lady. Just like a 1920s lady. Just a lady.

Good on you, Ruth. But I think they're just trying to, everything's sensationalised. Everything's to a zero to a hundred. She's a red hot cutie. She's not a woman. She's the hottest woman of all time to 100. She's a woman. She's the hottest woman of all time. To me, it's so funny. Oh, please, boys, please, please say I want a wife like mother, not a red hot cutie. So weird.

According to Bryson, by almost universal consent, Ruth Snyder was held to be the guilty party. Judd Gray, the hapless dupe. Gray received so much mail, nearly all of it sympathetic, that it filled two neighbouring cells in the Queens County jailhouse. Whoa. The paper strove hard to portray Ruth Snyder as an evil temptress. The mirror dubbed her the marble woman without a heart, while Gray was dubbed the putty man. Oh, God. So that was often at, she's the granite woman.

She's made of stone. Yeah. No heart. He's putty, easily bending the way she wants him to. He's pathetic. Bryson continues, elsewhere she was called the human serpent, the ice woman, and in a moment of journalistic hyperventilation,

the Swedish Norwegian vampire. He's like, they were losing it. That's it. There's a lot going on. She's Swedish or Norwegian. She's very close to the border. According to Davis, the jury took only 98 minutes before returning with a verdict of guilty with both convicted of first degree...

She said she did. Yeah. All right, guys, we're going to need an hour. We're going to need lunch. We're going to need lunch on this one. Ah! Hmm. They just really don't want to have to go back to work that day. Let's drag this out a little. And hook up at four. They both admitted it!

I mean, do we even need a jury? Did you obviously plead not guilty? No, they must. Maybe they both pleaded not guilty. Otherwise you wouldn't have needed that, would you? They must have been like, no, I'm not guilty. He did it. Oh, okay. I'm not guilty. She did it. Yeah. I was there, but I didn't do it.

But the jury were like, they did it. Yeah, yeah. They both did it. My God. So both were convicted of first degree premeditated murder and the couple was sentenced to death in the electric chair at Sing Sing Prison. Whoa. And it happened all very quickly.

The executions took place on the 12th of January, 1928. According to Taylor, Grey sat smiling in his cell when the warden came for him. He had received a letter from his wife forgiving him. He told the warden that he was ready to go and that he had, quote, nothing to fear. Of Snyder, reports remembered that as she was being led to the electric chair, that she had said days before that God had forgiven her and that she hoped the world would too. Apparently she spent a lot of her time writing. She wrote her memoirs and depending on who you read, it was some pretty weird stuff, but I didn't read any of it, so I don't know. But the media wasn't done with its frenzy. They wanted a photo of the execution. Unfortunately for them, cameras were strictly prohibited. For all that's interesting,

Katie Serena writes, while photography was usually prohibited in executions, Sing Sing guards took it especially seriously in Ruth's case. No member of the media would get in with a camera and that much the guards were sure of. The editors of the New York Daily News knew that the Sing Sing guards were familiar with all of their reporters, so they outsourced. Tom Howard, a photographer for the Chicago Tribune, which owned the Daily News, agreed to go to Sing Sing as an undercover reporter. As he made his way through security and into the execution chamber, he stepped carefully as he was carrying contraband that if found was certain to get him ejected or possibly

arrested. Put him in the chair. Strapped to his right ankle was the reason for his careful footsteps. A custom single use camera, a miniature version of a classic model was neatly tucked beneath his pant cuff. A wide shutter release ran up his leg, the button within undetectable reach of his hand. Here's a photo of it. It's amazing. Wow.

So we're looking at a photo of the camera strapped to his ankle, just poking up just above. It's pretty bulky still. Just above the back. Yeah, like at the time was miniature, but now that's like, you know, it's the size of a Rubik's Cube or something. But presumably when he wants, he just has the pant, like the cuff goes over the top. Yeah.

He lifts it up for a second, takes a photo and then puts the cuff over the top. Wow. That's right. Yes. So after Snider was brought in, the small crowd watched as she was strapped to the chair. When it was turned on, Howard pointed his toe towards the chair and snapped a single photo. Though Ruth Snider was dead, her photo lived on. Oh, the photo he took was angled slightly and it was blurry, but nonetheless priceless. I was going to show you, but you probably don't.

Do you want to see it? Oh, I've seen this before. I remember seeing the and hearing about that he had a secret camera. That's incredible. It is a grim photo. Yeah, show us, because I think when I Googled it before to look at her face, I think. Right. I think I saw it and it's not as full on as I would have expected, maybe.

Because it's black and white and blurry. Yeah, yeah. Wow. I can't believe they're allowed to publish that. I know. Front page is so gross. Yeah, it's very interesting. We talked a lot about stuff like that in my journalism, law and ethics classes.

Like the photo on the front of Time magazine of somebody plunging from the World Trade Center. Oh, right. Oh, falling man. Yeah, yeah. Talked about the ethics of that. It's very interesting. But yeah, it's crazy.

Isn't it wild that they publish that on the front page? Especially when it's against the rules of having a photo in there. Yes. It feels like you could still get arrested post. Yeah. And that interesting is like, no, you got away with it. But he must have been paid well to risk it, I reckon. He was given a hundred dollar bonus.

Wow. Which I guess, you know, was a good cash, but not. Not life-changing money. Yeah. If you went to jail and didn't get the photo and they're like, we never told you to do that. Yeah. That was what he got for giving him a photo. The photo gets ends up getting used the morning after the execution. It was on the front page of the New York Daily News under the headline that simply

read dead or caps exclamation marks. The photo was instantly hailed as one of the most famous tabloid photo of the decade. And indeed it was. The photo itself as hazy as it was, was shocking. The image of Ruth Snider's fingers curled around the arms of the electric chair haunted audiences for years. I'm still should say I'm still reading from Katie Serena's article. Howard was given a hundred dollar bonus for the photo, like I said, which caused a change in prison procedure for decades after anyone attending an execution was thoroughly searched before they were allowed into the room with particular attention paid to pant legs.

Lift them up. Lift them up. Show us your ankles. Oh yeah, that's it. Oh yeah. That's what I want to see. And then the ward's like, cameras? What are you talking about? Sorry, what?

Finally, our mate Bill Bryson talks a bit about how much of an effect his murder and the trial had on pop culture, writing, the Snyder case was clumsy and banal and didn't even hold out the promise of exciting court revelations since both of the accused had already fully confessed. Yet it became known without any sense of hyperbole as the crime of the century and exerted a most extraordinary influence on popular culture, particularly on Hollywood, Broadway and the more sensational end of light fiction. The film produced Adolf Zucca brought out a movie called The Woman Who Needed Killing. The title was later toned down.

That's a full on title. Full on. The woman who deserved to die. Jesus. Bit full on. And the journalist Sophie Treadwell, who had covered the trial for the Herald Tribune, wrote a play called Machinal, which enjoyed both critical and commercial success. And the part of Judd Gray in this production was played by a promising young actor named Clark Gable. Wow. The novelist James M. Kane, you see Ring a Bell, Dave? Yeah.

He was taken with the case so much that he used it as the central plot device for two different books. The Postman Always Rings Twice. Oh, he's one and Double Indemnity. He's like one of the hard-boiled fiction guys. Yeah, he was one of the ones who helped sort of create it. So, yeah, I'd heard of both of those books. Yeah, interesting.

But the Double Indemnity one especially was influential because Billy Wilder made it into the artfully lit 1944 movie of the same name starring Fred McMurray and Barbara Stanwyck. This was the movie that created film noir and so became the template on which a generation of Hollywood melodramas was based. Isn't it wild? This unhappy marriage and this clumsy murder ended up being so influential it created film noir. This huge ripple effect. Isn't it? Yeah.

It's incredible. Quite bizarre. Yeah. So cool to be able to trace those things back a little bit too. Yeah. Like, isn't like there's a cartoon version of Spider-Man that's film noir in, you know, played by Nicolas Cage. That's because of this. Nicolas Cage plays a cartoon film noir Spider-Man. That's it's one of this. Nicholas Cage plays a cartoon film noir, Spider-Man. It's one of his funniest roles.

Yeah, so that's the story of, I think what I'll probably call the murder of Albert Snyder. It was also known as the, the Sash Waite murder, but. Oh, interesting. I think probably, it was one journalist called it the Dumbbell murder. He's like, was one journalist called it the dumbbell murder. He's like, because the two murders were dumb. So dumb. Got him.

Yeah, he got him pretty good. Maybe Sash weight murder is good because I don't know what that is. What does that mean? I also don't know who Albert Snyder is, but I'd be like, no, I don't care. Because I don't know who Albert Snyder is. Right. What about the Albert Snyder murder in brackets? You should care.

OK, yeah. OK. It's just just no, it's just brainstorming.? You should care. Okay, yeah. Okay. It's just notes, just brainstorming. Okay. Just notes? What a story. It's an amazing, wild story and the fact that, yeah, the media and the public at large, imagine gathering to look at the building they might be in. And we were like 20-ish minutes in when we realised she'd confessed and there was no

twists or anything. I was like, where's he going with this? But it just kept like, what an incredible, and also, I mean, they've killed her husband. So their child is now an orphan. Yes. Awful for her. Very quickly that child's lost both parents. Yes. So the child, people would probably be interested. His brother, Albert's brother, there were two that fought for custody and her mum, and her mum ended up winning custody. Okay, so her grandmother raised him.

So she lived with her maternal grandmother. Wow. Yeah. Tough for her. Tough. Or horrific. Because it's so famous. Yes.

Yeah, like she wouldn't have been able to avoid it and then knowing that she was sleeping nearby. So traumatic. Everything about it. Awful. Just incredible. What a story. I just clicked on Tom Howard, who took the photo. I'm not sure if you came across this. And this is from wikipedia.org.

It's their photography website. Right. I'm not sure what the sources that they use on there, but it says personal life. Cameras mostly. Cameras talk. Picture paints a thousand words. It says they use on there, but it says personal life. Cameras mostly. Cameras talk. Picture paints a thousand words. He says Tom- Is that right? Yeah.

Tom Howard's grandson is George Wendt, who played Norm on Cheers. Norm! And his great grandson is actor and comedian Jason Sadiqus. Yeah, I only just found out the other day Jason Sadiqus's, like, uncle is George Wendt. So they're related to this very famous photographer. Isn't that cool? Incredible. Looked that up when I was rewatching Ted Lasso. I hope George Wendt has been in a film noir.

Oh, man. What? That would just... Whoa. That might implode the world. Yeah, that might be too much. He could be a great hardball detective though, George Wanniflaken. Yeah. Wow. I, my head's spinning a little from that story.

Yeah, just fascinating. So fascinating. And can I just say, well told. Well, my mate Bill helped out quite a lot. Fucking Bill. He loved Bill. I love Bill. I forgot about Bill.

I love Bill. I may be angry every time you said Bill Bryson. But it does a little bit of it later in, right? And you're like, no, maybe Bill knows I love Bill. I forgot about Bill. I love Bill. I may be angry every time you said Bill Bryson. But it does a little bit of it let in, right? And you're like, no, maybe Bill knows a good time. Maybe Bill can really spin a yarn. He can spin a yarn. That Bryson.

Well, that brings us to everyone's favourite section of the show. What rollercoaster ride that story was. But the next thing we do- I feel nauseous. Oh my God. Like how I feel when I get off a rollercoaster ride that story was. But the next thing we do. I feel nauseous. Oh, my God. Like how I feel when I get off a rollercoaster. Yeah, right. I don't have the stomach for rollercoasters.

Do you have a bit of fun, too? Or is it just nausea? I have a bit of fun, but then I feel very sick. I went to Luna Park not too long ago and I remember it all over again. Fun parks. I love the rollercoasters. I like the fast ones moving in sort of straight lines or curvy lines, but not the spinny ones. Right. I did a spinny one and I'm like, this isn't that fun.

I just feel sick in the stomach. You know, you're just sitting there like face looking lifeless. I can just picture myself like a waiting it out, you know? Yeah, yeah. And then you get up and like, 10 minutes to feel normal again. Yeah, I'm so glad I paid money for that. We went on a ride together, what, about 18 months ago, we went to that music festival.

Do you remember that one? Yeah, which music festival? And which ride? No, I don't remember. Was it you and me? No. Was it in Adelaide? No. No, this and me? No. Was it in Adelaide? No, no, I also went on in Adelaide, a great time.

But in the festival where No Affects and Tism played. Oh, yeah, we did go to that. And we went on a ride there. Yeah, I thought that was together. Yeah, probably. I thought we had a great time. We did, yeah. Now I'm just hearing that you don't like spinning around because we span around together.

What? What? Did that mean nothing to you? I mean, it depends. Some of the- it depends on how they're spinning, I think, because I can't always tell by looking at them whether I like it or not. Was it one that went like you went spinning and went out, we sort of went on chains and went out like this? Yeah, you kind of like- Yeah, those are fun because you sort of just go on fast. Yeah.

Is going fast enough? I think that's fun. And then I just remember over and over and over again, the pre-recorded video said, scream if you want to go fast. Yeah, that's right. Scream if you want to go fast. And I was thinking the poor operator has to hear this honestly 40,000 times a day. You've got to sleep hearing that. I'd fully forgotten about that. That was it.

Tism played there as well. Has it got good things? Good things. And we saw Regurgitator. Yeah, that's great fun. It's good that. That was it. Tism played there as well. Has it got good things? Good things. And we saw regurgitator. Yeah, that was great fun. It's good fun. Good fun fest. Great fun.

And remember it like it was yesterday. Very fun. Very fun memories. So the, so Jess is feeling nauseous. I'm feeling excited. Dave is feeling hurt by my lack of memory. But this brings us to everyone's favourite section of the show where we thank our great Patreon supporters.

If you want to get involved, go to patreon.com slash to go on pod. There's a bunch of different levels. The first one we work through. I mean, when I say there's a bunch of different levels, a bunch of different levels, a bunch of different rewards you get now, including starting from this month, a fourth bonus episode exclusive to Patreon. That's right. Do go DND, standing for Do Go On Dungeons and Dragons, Do Go Dungeons and Dragons,

something like that. You understand what we're trying to tell you what it is. Yeah. It's us playing Dungeons and Dragons with Adam Cannavale. Really fun. So much fun. So the first episode coming out this month is a long one. I think it goes like an hour and a half and it's us re-learning the rules. Yes. And also picking out characters. Yeah, which was, that's a fun process. That was fun.

Adam really guided us very well throughout. Gives you all the options of what the characters like. Yeah. What the powers they've got, if they carry items, weapons. I honestly think we played Dungeons and Dragons very well. Okay. I didn't expect the sentence end there. I think we had a lot of fun. Yes. Yeah, that's true. If the parameters you're looking for are fun and laughter, then yeah, I think we played it incredibly well.

And I can't remember if I said this on Pob, but I, a couple of days later, I had this thought, I'm like, oh, I can't wait to watch the end of that, that show. And then I realised the show was the Dungeons and Dragons campaign that we were doing. I can't wait to watch the end of that show. So many twists and turns. Yeah, it was so great. Really well told. Your character, your character early on said something that I've thought about ever since, and I will just be, I'll be in the car at a traffic light and I'll just chuckle to myself thinking about it. So there is some fun stuff in there. Maybe if you're like a real diehard

Dungeons and Dragons player, you'll definitely love it. Yeah, you'll be like, oh, now this is how it's meant to be played. Now this is dungeon. Definitely. I've realised now that I've never done it properly. So allow us to teach you. Yeah. But yeah, I'm excited for that to come out because it was a lot of fun.

And there's a bunch of other things. There's a bonus report every month. There's we do a fun game each month. There's four episodes of different things. Phrasing the bars coming to an end. We're going to set up a new movie club after that. But you can also get you get shout outs. There's a level called the Sydney Schomburg level gets you in the fact,

quote or question section, which is this very section. I actually as a jingle goes something like this. Fact, quote or question. Yeah. Oh, just put a little bit of a bit of cream on top there. That was vibrato, a little bit of cream on top there tonight. Not as vibrato, a little bit of vibrato. I don't know the technical terms. You always get vibrato and cream mixed up. You're always like, can I have a scone with jam and vibrato?

And I'm like, no, Matt. When I hear vibrato, it makes me cream. That's where the confusion comes in. But I love a little bit of a warble, a little bit of a quiver. Oh, one of my favourite bit of a quiver. Yes. Oh, one of my favourite things. To quiver. I like to listen to a quiver.

I love, Hap, the singer for The Dead Salesman has a great quiver and it just tickles the inside of my ear in a really nice way. Oh. Belinda Kahlo, another great quiverer. Now I know it's a vibrato. Correct. So in this part of the show, people on the Sydney Schomburg level or above get to give us a factor quote or a question or a braggart suggestion or really whatever they like.

And then I read them out. They also get to give themselves a title. The first one this week of four is Libby Mason. I should say I don't read them out till I read them out. So that's just pre apologizing for any mistakes I make. And Libby's title is President of the Green Bean Team. Bracket, Libby's is a brand name of canned vegetables in the US.

Ah, cool. We salute you, Libby. Oh, in that case, open, Hypentheses. What are they? What do they say? Parentheses. Parentheses.

Hypentheses. It's the most fandangled word for bracket. Yeah, parentheses. Parentheses. Yeah. Normally America's really good at making language available to everyone. You know, what do you call it?

Accessible. Democra-sizing it. Okay. Is that right? No. Democra-tizing it. There we go. That word could be fixed America if you don't mind getting that. If you don't mind working on that.

But in this case, they've gone the other way around. Yeah. They've made it like harder. Yeah. OK, so. Doesn't read these until he reads these out. So Libby's asking us a question. Libby writes, what was the inspiration and or reasoning behind the nine Dugon minis and can we look forward to anything similar in the future? Also, I love you all dearly and I recommend the show to anyone who will listen. Thank you for your countless hours of amusing content.

I'm on my 4-3 listen of the back catalogue. Wow, Libby. I thought Libby was going to say I love you all dearly. I was expecting a butt. And I was like, oh no, I literally, like I tensed. Your butt? And I recommend it. And you made an audible sound. I thought you were being like, oh thank you. No, no, I literally, I like, I tensed and I, I recommend it. You made an audible sound.

I thought you were being like, thank you. No, no, that was fear. That was my butt clenching. You were saying earlier, before we started recording that you don't like horror movies for those tense, tense tension and release things. And that, I mean, if you're that tense, can only imagine like a full on horror moment. Yeah, no.

What that would do to you. No. So they did that in horror movies. I love you all. Oh no. Oh no. You know they say that always before the kill. Oh.

That's probably true. Any nice moment is about to be. Actually true in a horror movie. Do go on Minis. That was a little web series that we recorded maybe four years ago, maybe a little bit longer, that we put out on Stupid Old Channel where we basically did the format of the show where one of us speaks a topic and researches it.

But in video form with animations from John, our Irish friend, who's a fantastic animator and a great set that Stupid Old Studios built. And then we also just put out the audio of those for people who maybe don't want to watch the videos and want to listen while they're running or whatever. And I guess, yeah, the inspiration was to try something different. Yeah. With the videos. Yeah, that was a great series.

I liked doing that. Yeah. The set looked awesome. No, it was sort of fun, slightly smaller stories, maybe. Yeah. Or like, we could make them a bit more compact. Yeah, that's right. I feel like there were stories that we probably couldn't get the full,

what we usually get an hour and a half report out of. But they were all interesting stories from all different parts of the world. Yeah, it started with, you told us the backstory of the Hollywood sign. Oh, that's right. Yes. And we just had Blackbeard. I was actually looking- Government cheese. I was on the YouTube on the channel last night looking at them. And yeah, they're it's funny to because I had the thought I'm like,

it's funny that they have had way less views than a normal episode does, because there was so much more effort goes into them. But that's just not what people want. Which is why we ended up putting out as audio audio too, because it's like, well, obviously people like to listen to us, but not watch us as much. And we're not going to take that. Mishapen heads. Yeah, we're all mishapen.

No, not all of us heads. Oh, they didn't want- But we are all in different ways. Mishapen. We all have a bit wrong. Yeah. And you can decide. They're up there forever on the Stupid Old Channel as well as our Do Go On quiz show,

which is if you want to watch us as well as hear us. Hey, we've got faces and they work. They talk. Whoa. Whoa. Yeah, there's a bunch of good stuff up on there. Gamey gamey game as well. The first season of The Beer Pioneer.

Yeah, it was funny just browsing around like, oh, so much good stuff up here. A few weeks ago on my channel, I put up a video of me thrusting in the studio. Just right where you're there now. I was thrusting away. This chair feels different. I should try a seated thrust. You should. I'm sure it's strong now. Oh, that's good, because the wheels.

Yeah. Oh, wow. good, because the wheels. Yeah. Wow. This actually works quite nicely. Ergonomic thrust. Thank you so much for that great question, Libby. Libby also says, I should probably go catch up on Who Knew It and the Patreon episodes. But, you know, you're just addicted to going through the main feed. I think that's fair enough. Xoxo. Xoxo to you too, Libby.

Gossip Bean. Gossip Bean. Thanks so much, Libby. Thanks so much for putting Jess through that rollercoaster there. Oh man, I've had too many rollercoasters today. I'm going to be sick. The next one comes from Joseph Notaro. First timer into the Fat Quarter Question Club. And Joseph has given himself the title of Senior Vice President of Struggling to Hear

Dogshit Riffs Over Road Noise. Oh no, I know what this will be about. This is my voice is lost in the road. But we got AJ on the edits these days. Hopefully in the last year or so, my voice is a little bit more audible over the road noise, because that was one of our specific notes to him when he came on. I said, can you make me audible over a car engine? And he said, yes, I can.

I said, thank you, little boy. Little boy from New Zealand. He said, yes, I can. That's how fucking stupid you sound every time we get AJ on and you immediately start mocking his accent. No, his friends have said, his friends have said to me that they can't bullet, that I'm the first person they've heard who can do it justice. Isn't that amazing? He's played it to him and they've been like, that's actually really good. So no one told.

That is actually pretty spot on. Do you think that he played it to them saying, do I really sound like this? And they went, I'm sorry. Should I quit this job? No, I think he sounds awesome. I love listening to his voice. I love it as well. Fantastic.

Love it. Pop culture. No, cult pop culture. Yeah. That's such a hard podcast I have to remember. Yeah. Anyway, who we-ture. Yeah. That's such a hard podcast, I have to remember. Yeah. Anyway, who we got? Joseph.

Yes. With a brag writing, I don't tend to be the biggest braggart around, which is why this brag is not about me, but my lovely wife, Dana. She has just recently graduated with a doctorate in audiology after 10 long years of study. Oh, hell yeah. 10 years, that's sick. I've done my best to support her as a lowly truck driver, and I can safely say that all those long hours were worth helping her achieve her dream.

She's already got a job as the head vestibular audiologist at a local practice and I couldn't be prouder. Confident I didn't say vestibular, right? Yeah. Vestibular. Vestibular. Yeah. Ferris's sister. I had to jump on the Patreon to tell as many people as I could about my Dr. Wife, which is what she now insists I call her. Fair enough.

Thanks for all the hot content that helped keep me sane while I was over the road these past years. Hey, thank you so much. Welcome aboard, Joseph. So good to have you. And congratulations. Huge. Dr. Wife Dana. Oh, Dana, what a legend. Dr. Dana. Long time to dedicate to it.

So cool. So exciting. It sounds like it's already paying off for the sweet new gig. So congratulations. I also really like, and I think I said this recently, I like that people will use the fact quarter question to brag about themselves. Always want to hear that. But we are seeing a few people be like, I just want to shout out to my friend or my wife or my partner who's done something cool.

And you're like, that's the bet. You guys are lovely. Yeah, that's the best. You guys are lovely. Yeah, that's really nice. How did us three terrible people attract an audience of such lovely, kind, sweet people? I would say though, like, do you see her and speak to her, Joseph? Just say it to her, you know? Fuck, you're right. I'm worried about your relationship if you happen to use intermediaries.

Communication is pretty important in a relationship. Yeah. So just, I just think you should tell her as well. Yeah, don't tell us. We don't care. Tell your wife. Sorry. Tell your doctor wife.

Tell your doctor wife. OK? And also- Schedule a checkup if that's what it takes. Yeah, don't tell me. An audio checkup. A non- You know, schedule a checkup if that's what it takes. Yeah, don't tell me. And audio checkup. A non-doctor fucking stranger? I'm not your doctor wife.

I don't care. No, but I think what you said first was right. It's very lovely. Yeah, it was very nice. It was very, very sweet. Loved that. And tell Dana we said hi. Yes.

Tell her we said hi and also, yeah, enjoy retirement. You looked after her for 10 years. Now it's her turn. Now it's her turn. Now it's her turn. That's how I understand relationships. Very tit for tat. Put your feet up and enjoy. Ten years off the road.

Wow. Ten years on, ten years off. That's pretty good. Yeah. FIFO. FIFO, DRIFO. Thank you, Joseph. Next one comes from Shannon.

Shannon-an-an-an-an-an-an-an. Did you? Yes. Do you think it's because he hit the shang. Next one comes from Shannon. Shannonanananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananan And Shannon has a suggestion. They write, I have to suggest to you and all fellow Duggo on listeners that you watch the hit show, Our Flag Means Death. I can best describe it as a queer pirate workplace romantic comedy. It features the relationship between Steed Bonnet, the gentleman pirate. He came up in the Blackbeard episode of the minis. Isn't that wild?

Whoa. Wow. Yes, Jess did a mini episode, which you can watch the video for, about Blackbeard the Pirate. Really fascinating tale. Also Edward Teach, aka Blackbeard. Also features in that episode. We should have kept reading. They are played to perfection by A toroa actors, Rhys Darby and Taika Waititi with a stellar

supporting cast. Sorry to interrupt your fact, quote or question, this is editor AJ here with my hilarious New Zealand accent just to correct Matt's butchered pronunciation of Aotearoa. Alright back to the show. The show is a landmark of representation for queer people including Jim a prominent non-binary character people of color and Neurodivergent people it was sadly cancelled before its third and final season. Oh, that's so annoying now We're gonna I hate when shows get cancelled and you know, their plan is just to run forever You're like, you know that stuff but cancelling it before the planned final season

And you're like, well, I know they left on a bit of a cliffhanger. So there's no resolution for me as a fan of this show. It's so annoying. So annoying. But fans have put together a massive renewal campaign featuring a petition, an airplane banner, even a billboard in Times Square. This show has changed the lives of me and so many people I know creating a real community, much like Do Go On has done.

Please spread the word about this remarkable groundbreaking show. Uh, I, well, you've spread it to me. I've, I actually auditioned for a partner, but I did not get anywhere near it. And- But with that beard? I know! That's how bad my acting was. Your parents! I think I had to do an, I had to do an accent and I just said, I think it was English. But anyway, you can do English, be a Dell.

Hello, I'm a Dell. Hello, I'm a pirate. Perfect. Come on. Hey, hey, hey, hey. I should have, I went with a different, I think I went Cockney. Because I don't think it specified which English accent. It's like, there's so many.

Anyway, Shannon, I should, yeah, I've got to watch it. Where is it available in Australia? I'm not sure. I think it might be on Binge. Binge, right. I've watched it. I watched it at the first season on a plane. It's very fun.

Yeah, awesome. Oh, great. And there's definitely hope for it. Like, Future Armor. I think it did happen with Community. It's happened with shows that they have been brought back due to like, you know, the fans. Popular demand. Yeah, or sometimes they bring it back for a movie or something just to wrap it up.

So you at least got some an ending. Some resolution. Yes. You're killing me. I need to know what happens. Yeah, but I've got to go back and watch the second season because I watched the first one as soon as soon as it was out. But yeah, that's great. I'm currently looking for someone to watch, so I'm going to get onto that. Thank you, Shannon. The fourth and final this week, we never cancelled before the final, is from Roy Phillips, aka, man trying to cram a tan clam into a clean cream can again.

It honestly makes no sense how he can just- How do you do that? Sometimes he can't say Matt Stewart properly. I tried to- I'm assuming again, it's meant to be said like, again, again, it must be where Roy's from. That must be how they say it. I guess. I loved it though, Roy. That felt exhilarating. It's like you just clear your mind. Yeah, I think that's it. I just, I see it and I realise it's happening about four words in.

Yeah. And I go just roll. Yeah. Just roll. That's nice. Why can't you do that with your report? It's a mini meditation. I know I really should. I think it's because this one, I know the ends inside, inside. Yeah. At the end of the sentence. Well, you have to talk for an hour. It's a bit different.

Roy has, what is this for the first time? A celebration. Oh, I love it. I don't know if we've had a celebration before. That's fun. Celebrate good times. Come on. I will. You should have heard before I was going to finish that.

Come on, Roy. I will. Dave. I was talking about, like, not literally mate. Okay, so Roy writes. Stand by what I said. I just want to say a massive congratulations on five years to the day as I'm writing this that's in brackets or parentheses.

Well, high-pentheces. Just want to say a massive congratulations on five years on Matt saying day one, randomly during episode 194, Race Around the World. Wow. Five years since day one. Day one. Day one.

Oh my God. Day one. You still don't know what you were talking about. No. We didn't know either. We just didn't we just sort of go, mmm. And I was like, like later in the episode, I said, I've got to clear this up. I can't stop thinking about it.

Is that how it happened? I said day one earlier. So it's what day are we up to then? Yeah, well, you do the sums. Five times 365 plus probably one for a leap year in there as well. Maybe two leap years. It's too confusing. 1827.

Wow. Crazy. So say that number again. 1827. Day 1827. Side question, what's been your favourite moment in the show from the last eight and a half years or so? I think you can probably guess mine.

You like day one? On your Roy. Favourite moment? I mean- There was a time where we, like, I did spew out some weird things, because that was- Was that around the same time as Daish? Daish? Yeah, I've got a similar period.

Which was me having to come up with something on the spot. My brain gave me Daish. Daish. Favourite moment? I mean, I'm just- There's too many. I mean, my recent favorite moment, it's got to be Brad Pierce. Of course. And yeah, my first one I thought of was, I think it was actually a Patreon episode anyway, but it was Matt really losing it about the marathon runners.

Oh, yeah, that's one of my favorite moments. When you really break Matt, I break easy. No offense. It's a of my favorite moments. When you really break Matt, I break Easy. No offense. It's a bad thing on me. I've really had big laughs at a lot of things. I'm an easy laugh. Breaking you two is a treat. Brad Piss was a delight because you really lost it.

I thought you were going to throw up. Me too. You thought you were going to throw up. From A to Ant also got me written last year. Oh yeah, A to Ant was great. But yeah, when you really get Matt going, it's delightful. It happens once a year or so. Yeah, and it's really fun.

And it's not always on the pod, I'd say, you know, but it's great when the cameras are rolling. Something recently, it was an image that was getting you going and you had to shut the laptop. I think you couldn't think about it and you would start laughing, you're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Oh yeah, because we were about to record and I'm like, I can't. What was it?

It was something really stupid. It was a meme or something. Yeah. It was a real stupid meme. Don laughs, no, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, that's right. He had to keep closing the laptop. He's like, I can't look at this.

No, no, no, no, no. Okay. There was one at a, I don't, I can't remember what it was about, but one of our Christmas live shows at Comedy Republic, something happened. Oh. Oh, no, it was the Who Knew It, where one of you wrote a movie synopsis. I can't remember what I had, but it was like. Yeah, it broke you.

It broke me. Yeah. Speaking of live shows, it was also the time, uh, the dinnerware confusion for the Sydney show. That was good fun. And then later that show, we sang the nanny theme. I think something about Dave not knowing a basic word or something is really interesting. You know where a sugar bowl is?

Sugar bowl! And then my dad texted me to say, of course we had a sugar bowl growing up. And I'm like, oh yeah, that bowl that had the sugar in it. It's a sugar bowl. Because what were you- what was your confusion with that one? There was someone's nickname was sugar bowl and I was like, what do you mean? And you're like a sugar bowl. I was like, what's that?

Literally like you were saying, like daish. And I was like, what does that mean? Yeah. Whereas dinnerware, you could sort of understand if you- starting from scratch, dinnerware, that means clothes you wear to dinner. Yes. Yeah, yeah. That was fun. So there's lots of favourite moments, but also I forget nearly everything immediately. Yeah, Yeah. That was fun. So there's lots of, lots of favorite moments, but also I forget nearly everything immediately. Yeah. A lot of fun moments. I've forgotten the episode we're

doing the Patreon for right now. I love the episode. One of my favorite moments was your BTK episode, Jess, and I missed some clear clue early on that it was a solved case. Oh. So I was listening to that whole thing, being like, it's still a mystery in my head. But you knew obviously, and Dave heard what you said at the start, but when you revealed he was caught, man, that was exhilarating. Yeah. Yeah. Fist pumping.

Yeah, that felt so good. What about the twin reveal in the- Oh, that was a great moment. That was a good one. You're a great revealer. That was the best moment. I am very revealing. Best block moment that was last year.

That was a good one. So many. It's funny. We normally don't like to talk about ourselves like this. But thank you for asking. Thanks so much Roy, Shannon, Joseph and Libby. Next thing we do is thank you for our other great Patreon supporters. Jess only comes up with a bit of a game based on the topic at hand. Slightly trickier.

It is a tough one. Now we can either do murder weapons. Oh, yeah. Or. Alibis. Oh, giant Italians. Yeah. And the clue that they leave an Italian newspaper. Why would they have?

It's such a funny thing. They've killed a man of some of the jewels. We'll have a quick read of the paper. Oh, I almost forgot. I didn't check the stocks. I didn't check the Italian. It was like anarchist stocks. And I'll leave that behind.

I didn't check if that bomb I left at the stocks went off. Well, I've read it. I guess they might, you know, any of the ones we left living here, they might want to read it. All right. Well, which one do you want to choose out of those two, Poppa? Let's do an alibi. We can work together. All right. Great. I'll read them out. Not an alibi, but like who they said, you know what I mean.

Yeah. Yeah. You know what I mean. You've been basically caught almost red handed, but you said, no, no, no, it wasn't me. It was the one-armed man. Dave comes up with them. Jess, you say the piece of evidence that they leave to. Perfect. Yep.

All right. First up, I'd love to thank- I've got my first one ready to go. You don't even know what this- Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. It'll work, though. It'll work. This is a perfect versatile thing.

Okay, great. All right. First up, I'd love to thank, from Lower Hutt, New Zealand, nah, nah. It'll work. It'll work. This is a perfect versatile thing. Okay, great. All right. First of all, I'd love to thank from Lower Hutt, New Zealand, it's Putrid Crevice. It was one of our funniest Patreon supporter names. But isn't it- is it better or what- I think it's better now knowing that it's a Kiwi. Putrid Cri- Putrid Crivis. That's way better, right?

That is good. Because I was picturing it like, it sounds English, you know, Putrid Crevice. I'm putrid. I'm putrid. That is absolutely putrid. No, that's Australian, isn't it? Putrid Crevice's alibi. No, it wasn't me.

It was the McDonald's Hamburglar. They dropped by and stole all of the things. Yep. And they left behind a sponge. But it had like the McDonald's logo on it. Like a Happy Meal Sponge. No, just a regular sponge. Putrid crevice.

Yeah, I know I fancy a putrid but I don't really know. Putrid. Putrid. Well, obviously I'm not framing him. Otherwise I would have put down a happy meal or something. Exactly. Sponge. Sponge.

I think we should believe putrid crevice. Putrid crevice. Cropcrot crevice. Putrid crevice. I think I said it best the first time. Anyway, next up, Sutton Forest is where they're from in New South Wales, Australia. It's Kate. It's Kate. No, it wasn't. Kate didn't do the crime.

No, as if Kate would have done it. Kate L, Kate O. Kate O. It was the little girl scout selling cookies door to door who broke in, did the crime and then left. But what did they leave behind, Jess? did the crime and then left but what did they leave behind Jess? Dave for the first who has given you such obvious things for it to be and are you going to take that or are you going to go your own way Jess? The mop. Which, of course, they carry door to door because if you're selling cookies and someone

immediately starts cooking them, they're eating them, you can say, whoa, whoa, whoa, don't worry, part of the service, we'll mop up. And obviously, when you've committed a horrific murder, as this girl scout did, a triple homicide, you got to clean up after the crime and she did that with a mop. Yeah. It wasn't Kate. It was the girl. It was the cookie scout with the mop. With the mop. You do the crime, you do the time mopping up. Next up from Thornberry here in Melbourne, Victoria.

It's Lauren Maher. Lauren Maher. It wasn't Lauren Maher who did the crime. It was her neighbour, Richard. It was Rich. You know, everyone knows Richard. They live in a building, they all know Richard. Yeah, we've all got, Richard. Oh. It was Rich. You know, everyone knows Richard. Richard. They live in a building, they all know Richard.

Yeah, we've all got a Richard. Mine's an Andrew. I don't know. Ruth, she blamed a mythic- someone who doesn't exist, so knowing- she'd get away with it in her dreams. Yeah. And they'll be chasing this guy, doesn't really exist. But in the case of Lauren Maher, she's fingering her neighbour.

Yeah, because Richard's opened the door to see the police and across the hall going, Hey, what's going on? Yes, he did it. It was Richard. Richard did it. And I've got evidence because he left behind- A tiger cub. A tiger cub. Classic Richard. Classic Richard.

That's why nobody likes him. He's always breeding tigers in there. You should do him for that as well. Is this true or is this also a lie? He's like, no, I don't. I could prove that quite easily. And also the tiger cub has escaped, so there's no evidence of him leaving Tiger Cub. Yeah, but it was here.

It was here. It has scratched the couch and that was not done by a knife. No. And the crime is fraud. Thank you so much, Laura. Next up from La La Land, Los Angeles and California, it's John Wagner. John Wagner. And John Wagner's been arrested. But don't worry, he's got rock solid alibi and he can tell you who did the crime.

And that person is a small mouse. Oh, yeah. A small mouse broke in and did the crime, framed me. Yeah. But don't worry, I've got some mouse based evidence. Yeah. And that small mouse left behind. A 14 kilo wheel of cheese. Exactly. No wonder the mouse left it behind. Exactly.

We can't carry that. Mouse aren't ants. Mouse aren't ants. Mouse aren't ants. Okay. Mouse aren't ants. Mouse aren't ants. Mouse aren't ants.

They can't carry stuff that's way heavier than them. And then from then on, John in the interview is completely silent. No comment. Mouse on ants. Mouse on ants. They can't carry stuff that's way heavier than them. And then from then on, John in the interview is completely silent. No comment. I refer to my previous statement, mouse on ants. Mouse on ants. I've seen everything I need to say.

From Wembley in Great Britain, it's Liam Rutherford. Liam Rutherford has been arrested for an armed robbery. Whoa. But it wasn't Liam. It was Tom York, lead singer of Radiohead. Oh, yeah. And what did Tom leave behind? A cello. Oh, yeah. Exactly.

Musician. Radiohead, known for cellos. Exactly. Heaps of it. Yeah. And fair enough, you leave it behind. How are you going to run away with the cello? Well, you can put the cash in the case, though. Oh, shit. Yeah. So he left. He left. He took the case full of cash.

Left the cello. Perfect. Tom York, you are diabolical. You're doing it again! From Miriam in the United States, in Kansas, perhaps, it's Kyle Potter. Kyle Potter. Kyle Potter. And that reminds me, what was the crime for Kyle Potter? The crime for Kyle Potter was grand theft larceny. Oh, wow. Grand theft larceny.

Is that a thing? I think you've added the theft in. Okay, grand larceny. Wow. What does larceny mean? We don't have time to look it up. What we do have time is to say it wasn't him. It was a man with a jack-o'-lantern on his head. It sounds like it's theft. It's unlawful take a removing of another.

Which is why you need to say theft. It is, it means theft. Yeah. Grand theft loss. Because it's actually like, say, ATM machine or PIN number. Yeah, that would be the case if he didn't steal someone's theft. Oh, yeah. Okay, great, great. I say what you're saying. Yeah, fair enough.

But it wasn't he didn't steal the theft, someone else stole the theft and it was the man wearing the jack-o'-lantern on his head. Yeah. Oh, Jack? Pumpkin Jack? What's his name? Yeah, the jack-o'-lantern. I mean, you'll find him, there's not that many of them. Is it like a permanent that is his head or he's wearing it? We don't know. Right.

We don't know. It could be his head. My theory is it's probably his head. Yeah. Because why would you wear that? If you could take it off, you would. Yeah. Who is that guy? And he's left behind a Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz costume. Oh, God.

The plaid dress, the red slippers. Was that going to be the little escape outfit? Like you do the crime wearing the jack-o-lantern and then you put on the- Look, it's hard to say if that was going to be an escape outfit or if he just had somewhere else to be later that night. Maybe a costume party. Could have been Jack Pumpkinhead, fictional character from The Land of Oz, who- It could have been.

Appears in many of the classic Oz books. Could have also been Richard dressed up with the costume. Oh, do you think he's on a crumbs fray? I think all of these could have been Richard. But you gotta remember. I hate Richard. Richard ain't a mouse. Ain't a mouse.

Mouse ain't ants. No, I've made it sound more like English. Mouse aren't ants. Mouse aren like English. Mouson ants. Mouson ants. Mouson ants. Aoson ants. Is that what you're saying? Yes, Aoson ants.

Aoson ants. From Springdale, Arizona in the United States, please. And thank you, Brantley Wheeler. Brantley Wheeler. The Wheeler's, weren't they also Oz characters? Doesn't matter, but what did happen? What did happen? What? I'll tell you what did happen.

You said that back, but it didn't make sense. But it made what did happen. What did happen? What did happen? I'll tell you what did happen. What is life? Brandi Wheeler has been framed by Ronald Reagan's nephew. Oh, wow. Yeah.

And they're real proud of it. That's yeah. Yeah. I'm Rodan Reagan. Oh, you might have heard of my uncle. Ron. Ronny. Oh, you might know him as President Ronald Reagan. Yeah, but I call him Uncle Ron.

But my name is Rex Reagan. Rex Reagan. And Rex Reagan left behind the taxidermied body of Phalap. Oh, wow. And that led everybody straight to the Reagans. Yeah. Of course, they famously like horses. Love.

No Phalap specifically. Yeah, they love Kiwi born Australian champion race horse who was killed in America. Yes. They love it. Gonna do that episode one day, but I guess I kind of just did. Yes, spoilers. From Ellicott City in M.D., probably Maryland. Probably.

In the United States, or Maryland, as we'd say here, but we're fools. It's Tyler Brown. Tyler Brown has been framed, but it wasn't Tyler. It wasn't Tyler. And it wasn't the one armed man. And it certainly wasn't the two armed man. It was the three armed man. Oh, wow.

Lecture arm coming from the chest. Was it that guy from that book that you told me and Jess about on Bookcheat? Yes. Guardians of the Galaxy? No, Hitchhikers of the Galaxy. Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. It could have been. I have to re-listen to that. I've forgotten it. I'm listening to the book of the Galaxy. No, Hitchhikers of the Galaxy. Hitchhikers of the Galaxy. It could have been. I have to re-listen to that.

I've forgotten it. I'm listening to the book at the moment. That's why. Alright. Yes, Tyler Brown. So the one, the Three-Armed Man did it. Jess, what do they leave behind? Well, it's, he's not just a Three-Armed Man, he's also a Three-Boobed Man.

Oh, yeah. So he's left behind a Three-Shell Bra. Oh, yeah. Behind a three shell bra. Oh, wow. Yeah, OK. For his aerial costume. There must be a costume party happening. Yes. Doesn't it seem like the cops could just figure this out? Yeah. I think you might be able to figure out that all these criminals are coming from the same party or friend. Richard?

They're all Richard. Oh, my God. Richard's the man of a thousand outfits. Yeah. And the man of a thousand outfits. Yeah, and the man of a thousand arms. Really? Yeah. That sounds- that sounds like that would- How many outfits do you reckon you've worn in your life? Oh, seven.

Seven. Eight? From birth to now, hundreds of years for you. For us, a very normal, cool amount. Yeah, yeah, yeah cool amount. Yeah. One. Yeah. Seven, eight, nine.

Nine? Nine. Let's say nine, I reckon. Nine outfits. All Frenzel Rom theme. Yeah. It's funny. Some days I'm wearing like multiple layers of Frenzel Rom and I don't

realize I take off a Frenzel Rom top and people will be like, what the? Oh, I'm not doing it. It just happens to be a third of my walk through the front door. Finally, from address unknown, can only assume from deep was in the fortress of the moles, please. And thank you, Mark and Daniel. It wasn't Mark and Daniel. It wasn't from the last time. For goodness sakes, it wasn't Mark and Daniel, but it was two other people.

It was Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen. Whoa. I knew it. When they were very young too. Because they started making trouble in their neighbourhood. But, I mean, the story goes on. But what was left behind? They actually left behind their birth certificates.

Oh, yeah. Oh, rookie error. Yeah, so that actually made it very obvious. Because obviously we all carry ours around at all times just in case. He's mine. They'll probably have their way to birth, death and marriages or the damn V or something. Yeah, yeah, to do what? You know, update their...

Just check in, update. Yeah, and maybe they needed their... What's that number that Americans have? Social Security number. They probably had to update this as Social Security number. Yeah, you gotta update that. Yeah. It's not just a one done, you gotta keep updating it.

It's not one done, you gotta bring in your birth certificate update your SSSC. Do you get to pick your own number? I'd like 69696969. Yeah. Oh, yeah. All right, Mary-Kate. Well, Ashley says I- Ashley speaks on the third person. Ashley says I want 696969.

All right, well, you'll have to rock off for it. All right. Oh, we drew. We always do. We're twins. That's how it would have gone. Thank you so much to Mark and Daniel, Tyler and Brantley and Kyle and Liam and John and Lauren and Kate and Putrid.

The last thing we need to do. It's early in the day. The last thing we need to do. It's early in the day. The last thing we need to do. I think we recently, we become more sensible as the day goes on. Do you reckon? I hate that about us. Cause then I go home and I'm sensible. Yeah.

I'm like, hello darling. I'm home from work. Business, business, business. Yes. Shall we make dinner and discuss stock? I don't want to do that. I thought you were going to say love. Shall we make love?

No, absolutely not. That's not sensible. Dinner and discuss things. Yeah. Discuss love. Shall we talk about our investments? Shall we plan for the future, darling? That's how I talk.

Are you done with the business section, darling? Pass it over. It's the only section I wish to read, darling. Thank you, darling. Thank you, darling. As you were, darling I wish to read, darling. Take it darling. Take it darling, as you were darling. As you were darling. Darling.

So, I think that was a pretty good impersonation of your beloved partner. But sorry, should check in still enough? Still enough. Okay. For now. Yeah. The last thing we like to do is a triptych club We welcome in a few people have been on the shout out level or above for three straight years There's three inductees this week Dave explain what the triptych club is

This is our Hall of Fame slash clubhouse slash hangout zone for people that have been supporting the show for three consecutive years We say hey, we appreciate you and we want to induct you into our Hall of Fame We let you run on in while previous members cheer you. And then once you're inside, there's everything you can imagine. There's music, there's drinks, there's lights, there's cameras, there's action. There's all sorts of things. There's table ice hockey. There's booths.

It's supposed to just be air hockey. And you've got to be more clear about that. I couldn't be clear about it. I've put a big sign on it saying, no one touch, especially Matt. Yes. And you keep covering my air hockey table in ice. You know how often you speak ironically. It's hard to keep track.

OK, so how can I make it clear to you not to touch my air hockey table? For starters, don't draw a winky face after that. Okay, fair enough. I was trying to lighten the blow because I felt like I was being mean. Well, to me, it just comes across as, you know what I mean? Like, don't touch it, touch it. Okay, but I have also put a padlock over it. Like, I don't understand how you keep breaking into it.

But you also put a winky face on it. Okay? I'm just really into winking right now. I know you're into winking. I know you're trying to make winking your thing. Yeah. Stop trying to make winking your thing. It's not going to happen. I want to be a winker.

Well, it's not happening. OK, well, thank you. Everyone, everyone. Thank you for being real with me. Because everyone's saying it. Everyone's like, she's not she's trying so hard. That hurts, but thank you for being honest with me. Anyway, whatever, let's just move on. Welcome to people and please don't touch my hockey table.

Okay. And Jess, you're behind the bar. You sort of cater, you sort of do whatever liquid catering is. Yeah. And do you have any drinks or foods based on today's topic? Where was this one set? I've already- This one set in-

New York City? New York City. Was it? Yeah. Well, it was- yeah, it was. Okay. Well, that's where the- it happened- what? Queen's Village, New York City. Was it? Yeah. Well, it was, yeah, it was. Okay. Well, that's where the, it happened, Queens Village, New York City. Great.

So. But he was in Syracuse for a bit as well. New York, what do you think of? Hot dogs. Yeah. Oh yeah. I got hot dogs. Got some New York slice.

Yeah, which is what they call a hot dog cut in half, isn't it? Yes. Slice in half, right down the middle. Yeah. It's actually very precise. You say, I want the left side. Yeah. So, no worries. No worries.

There you go. So we've got that. And then for beverages, I have water. Oh yeah. You think New York, you think water. Yeah. Yes. Straight from the Hudson River.

Yep. Wow. Delicious, fresh Hudson water. It's good stuff. It's good stuff. Mmm. That's hearty. Yeah, that's what you say. All right. So there's good stuff. Good stuff. That's hearty. Yeah, that's what you say.

Alright, so there's three inductees this week. Dave, you got a band playing the after party? Yes, and when I think New York, I think Portuguese Canadian singer-songwriter Nelly Furtado is here! She's like a bird. More than anyone else I know. Still killing it. Nelly Furtado, 192nd most played artist in the world on Spotify at the moment. That's pretty good.

Still killing it. Top two hunch. 27 million monthly listeners. Huge. And now we get to see her live. Awesome. All the hits, promiscuous, man eater, I'm like a bird, eat your man, et cetera. Yep.

Man eater and eat your man. She's hungry. She was starting to- Eat your man is a Dom Dollar one. She features on Dom Dollar track. Dom Dollar ways. Dom Dollar ways. He said Dom Dollar ways, funnyekerman is a Dom Dollar one. She features on Dom Dollar Wees. He said Dom Dollar Wees funny. Dom Dollar.

Dom Dollar Wees. Correct. That's some niche stuff. Alright, so. I've got to be getting ready, don't I? Alright, I'm hopping myself up. Hey, no need for that. I'm here baby. So we have three inductees this week. I'm on the door. I've got the piece of paper. the clipboard, got the names.

I'm going to read them out. Dave's on stage. He's hyping you up. If you hear your name, run on in. He'll hype you up. Everyone else in there is going to cheer along. Jess will hype up Dave, because he does pretty weak wordplay. That's how he helps you out. Come on, mate. Come on. You're ridiculous. You just heard I need to hype myself up over here. You are absolutely insane.

I'm lowering their expectations so you can at least just about get over it. You're a really bad friend. I actually appreciate the lowering part. All right. So first up, please welcome from Mount Riverview in New South Wales, Australia, it's Sabela Hebbels. More like my best pala Hebbels. Yes! Woo!

Sabela Heebles, Sabela Hebels. I'm so sorry. I have a bad feeling I've not got that right. Also from, welcome them, from Telphaner in Texas in the United States, it's Leeroy Hines. More like Leeroy Fines. Oh, Leeroy, you fine. Yeah, that kind of thing. Oh, you're not like, you're not making pay for an infringement.

No, no, no, but Leeroy can afford it because they're worth it. And finally, from Western Supermare, which I believe is where the tall guy from Monty Parthen's from, in Great Britain. Couple of them are quite tall. What's the real tall one? John Cleese. John Cleese. It's Jake Middleton.

Jake Middleton. There ain't no fake Middleton, it's Jake Middleton! Oh, oh, oh. Woo. Wow, Dave, you've done it again. Welcome in Jake Leroy and Sabella. Make yourselves at home. Please play a bit of table ice hockey. Enjoy a huddle water.

Yep. Mm, that's Huddy. And enjoyment. Don't forget. Yes. Oh, yeah. You didn't even read out my favorite one of hers, which I can't remember what it was, but it was a different one.

Anyway, that brings us to the end of the episode. Is there anything we need to tell people just before we go? If you would like to suggest a topic you can, you beautiful little butterfly. There's a link in the show notes and you can also find it on our website, dogoonpod.com, where you can find info about upcoming shows and other podcasts. And you can find us on social media at Do Go On Pod or Do Go On Podcast on TikTok. Dave, boot at home. Hey, hey, hey, I'm afraid all good things must come to an end, including this episode. But until next week, we'll say thank you so much for listening and

goodbye. Later. Bye. We've completed that. Yeah. AJ, edit that out. Do not make me look like I'm incompetent on this show. Oh, no.

Now he might leave it in. No, no, don't. Because that sounded funny. Actually edit that out, please, AJ. Unless you're really pissing your pants, like literally. How would AJ laugh? Squelching. If you're sitting in a squelch, I'll leave it in.

Do an impression of AJ really pissing yourself laughing. Pretty good! I reckon it is.