Do Go On - 491 - Rube Waddell: Baseball's Zaniest Pitcher

Episode Date: March 19, 2025

Whether you are a baseball fan or not, you will definitely enjoy the story of the life and career of 'The Rube' Waddell. Famous for his pitching skills AND off the field antics.This is a comedy/history podcast, the report begins at approximately 4.07 (though as always, we go off on tangents throughout the report).For all our important links: https://linktr.ee/dogoonpod Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/Who Knew It with Matt Stewart: https://play.acast.com/s/who-knew-it-with-matt-stewart/Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader ThomasDo Go On acknowledges the traditional owners of the land we record on, the Wurundjeri people, in the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders, past and present. REFERENCES AND FURTHER READING:https://sabr.org/bioproj/person/Rube-Waddell/https://www.amazon.com.au/Rube-Waddell-Brilliant-Strikeout-Artist/dp/0786407867?asin=B009TB1AXW&revisionId=c65b96b1&format=1&depth=1 https://pabook.libraries.psu.edu/literary-cultural-heritage-map-pa/bios/waddell__rube#:~:text=Waddell%20was%20born%20to%20his,the%20rest%20of%20their%20lives. https://oddsportsstories.com/2021/10/11/the-eccentric-life-of-rube-waddell/https://ourgame.mlblogs.com/rube-waddell-baseballs-peter-pan-3dc1a0bacf9c https://theinternetsaysitstrue.com/2024/06/17/rube-waddell-strange-pitcher/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey everyone, Dave here to let you know that we are doing some live shows in March and April 2025. Matt is doing his show Bad Boy at the Adelaide Fringe at the Rhino Room where he's also doing a live Who Knew It with Matt Stewart. Then we're both doing our stand-up shows at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. Matt is on at Spleen and I'm at the Improv Conspiracy with Sammy Peterson in our show Dave Warnocky Dates the Entire Audience. And this is a new announcement, we are also doing a Do Go On The Quiz Show live at the Festival Club one night only, Wednesday April 2nd at 11pm. It's going to be huge with great guests from across the festival.

Come out late and hang out with us even though it's a school night, it's going to be so much fun. You can get tickets to all these shows right now at dogoonpod.com. Hello and welcome to another episode of Do Go On. My name is Dave Warnocky and as always I'm here with Jess Perkins and Matt Stewart. Hello. Hello. So good to be here. Keeping the pleasantries brief this week I see. Good to see you.

And you. Well, great to have you here, I guess. Some people early on said that, you know, one of the strengths of Do Go On is our obvious friendship and to them I say, how dare you? We are cordial and that is it. We are fantastic actors. That's right. We are Australia's best actors.

Step aside, Hugo Weaving. Step aside, Miranda Otto. I'm thinking of Lord of the Rings. Nice. Step aside. David Wenham. Oh, my God. There's quite a few in that. We'll get.

Cate Blanchett. Cate Blanchett. Liv Tyler will take her. Oh, because it was filmed down. Are we claiming Liv Tyler now? That's pretty good. Oliver Bloom? He's basically one of us.

Oliver Bloom? All, all of a blue. We'll take all of him. We'll take all of Orlando Bloom. Orlando. Orlando Bloom. Well, he was married to Miranda Kerr, who is Australian. Oh my god.

So he's basically, he's basically one of ours. My best connection was he's now married to Katy Perry and she performed at the AFL Grand Final. But he was also married to an Australian. We're connected to this guy all over the place. Yeah, we'll take Katy Perry. Love this guy. Um, wow.

What an absolute treat to be here. We'll take Katy Perry and we'll put her in a bin. Oh, sassy. Dude, what the fuck? We'll take Katy Perry and we'll put her in a bin. Oh, sassy. Dude, what the fuck? I'm sorry about that. This is a pro Katy Perry podcast. I'm sorry. Do we? We do, do we? OK, sorry.

Thought that would be a funny thing to say, but it wasn't. And it was particularly funny on a big delay. I apologize. I think factoring in the delay plus your brain, it was about six months after we stopped talking about Katy Perry. As a world, it's more than six months, mate. She'll be back. She'll be back.

There's no greater sign of someone climbing up the zeitgeist than doing the AFL Grand Final. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a peak. You know that they're choosing between the Super Bowl and the AFL Grand Final. Gonna have to go AFL. The G just holds more. The G probably, the AFL Grand Final probably pays. Yeah, that's right. You don't get paid, do you? No, you don't.

That's true. Yeah, you do get paid by AFL pretty well, I think. So I think actually she's just a savvy businesswoman. She's a boss bitch. If I could put it into terms that I understand. That's for sure. That is for sure. Girl boss is what I mean. Yeah, boss bitch also works, but feels weird from you.

What I was trying to do was segue into explaining the show. Do you want me to do that? Cause you're going to do the report. Oh yeah. I thought you were doing the report. My laptop is open in front of me. Yes. You please explain. What we do here is we take it in turns to report on a topic often suggested to us by one of the listeners. We go away, do a bit of research, bring it back to the group in the form of a high school style report. The other two people listen cordially. This could be primary school.

This one. I wrote this with a migraine. On the weekend, I... So it's hard to say what's in this and if it's English. Oh, wow. We'll see. It's a primary school report on the culture of Japan. That's right.

Starting Japanese currently. Yeah, do you have migrants in Japanese? Not Japanese. Italiano. Thank you very much. Oh, mama mia. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Now, it is Jess's turn to report, and she's going to start by asking a question to get us onto topic now. A little peek behind the curtain here. Jess did say, off mic, which is very proud of this question. Could be her best ever. Yeah. Whoa.

You'll probably hate it. I don't like it, but I enjoy it. Love it. Here we go. It's a two-parter. Part one, what is the name of a cube toy, the aim of which is to end up with all the same color. I hear Rubik's from Matt.

Rubik's Cube? Rubik's is what I needed, but correct. Part two. Technically the toy is called the Rubik's Cube. Sure. Rubik's Cube is correct. So this is what I mean. I'm enjoying this. I'm sorry. This is fun. Sorry, I forgot this was fun. Hey, Dave, I'm on delay. How am I jumping in early than you?

I think we should let the audience know that I'm in Adelaide and that's how much quicker than Dave I was just then. We're half an hour behind you. I let you jump in and sort of fuck yourself up, which you did by not saying cube, then I come in and I take the glory. I knew, I knew she was looking for Rubik's. Okay. Just cause I'm ahead of the game doesn't mean I'm behind the game.

Okay. For this attitude, I think Bob who keeps track of all this Dave got the correct answer. That's part one. Part two. A duck doesn't walk it. Bottles. Okay, very good. Two points there for Dave. Rubik's Cube bottles. And today's report is about Baseball star Rube Waddell. See what you've done there. Okay. Bit of fun. Rubik's Cube Waddles.

Rubik's Cube Waddles. That's his full name. That's right. As we'll get to. This is a topic that's been suggested by a lot of people, including Moritz from Germany, Sam Sutherland from Montreal, Sam Long from Seymour, Wisconsin, Dan Copeland from Indianapolis, Alan Cameron from Memphis, Robert Gibbons from Dublin, Benjamin Whittingham from Liverpool, Cami Jamieson from Houston, Jacob Thompson from

Perth and Ruby O'Day from Richmond, Victoria. So lots of people suggested this topic. Either of you heard of Rube Waddell? Yes, I've done him on that sleep podcast. Ah, do you remember any of it? Because recently we did a report and you had done the entire story and had no recollection of it. I have no recollection of this guy at all.

It's so funny because I saw a post about him the other day, someone saying, this is such a wild story. And I'm like I've I Recognized this name and then yeah, I searched through my um my hatch folder And I'm like, oh I did this story. I have no I don't remember a thing about it I'm like how wild could this story be not memorable at all. I'd say yeah. Yeah. Yeah Wow I mean your voice is so powerful in that podcast. You put yourself to sleep and then you just slip walk through your whole report.

Honestly, it's incredible. I'm actually not sure Matt's woken up from that podcast. You still asleep, buddy? What? Huh? What? Change the channel, Mark. I think this is also one of those ones that because it's been suggested a few times

I've seen them seen it in the hat, but I just know it's a crazy baseball is kind of the the the feeling I've got from the pitch maybe yeah, yeah pitch. Oh my god. Yeah my god He is a pitcher oh no, I didn't do that and Dave is the pun master as proven once again He can't be stopped. That's right, but a master works for a king. Is that true? Behind every master is an even greater king. I don't know if that's anything. So, excited because it sounds like it's going to be a bit of fun.

It is a fun one and like, there's a's a lot of, um, there's a lot, there's quite a few resources on him. And if you're a big sort of baseball nut, a, you probably already know this name or know his story, but like there's a lot of juicy stuff you could go and really explore. I don't know heaps about baseball, so I haven't exactly gone a game for game breakdown of a bunch of terms. I don't understand. This is more like here's his early life and how he started in baseball

and here's some crazy antics. I want to know what was happening when there were four down in the second. Whatever that means. I don't understand any of it. What does that mean? I think if there's three down, you're out. So four down. Well, four down. It's gone really badly.

I think the downs actually might be talking about American football. So we're a sports podcast. When they get in touch down baseball, how many points do they get? Okay. So, George Edward Waddell, mostly growing up, referred to as Eddie, was born on October 13, 1876. One source noting that it was Friday the 13th. Oh, dear.

Is he going to be spooky? Yeah, he's pretty spooky. Spooky talented. He was born just outside the small farming town of Bradford, Pennsylvania. His parents were John Waddell and Mary Ford Waddell, who had four other children. Other sources say five other children. So four or five siblings. So that his mum's name had Ford in it and the town had Ford in it.

Which were they like a big, big in the town or something? Bradford, Pennsylvania and Mary Ford, I reckon her dad. No, I'm with you. OK, great. Her dad, Ford. Yeah. Founded the town with his mate, Brad. Yes. Oh, great. I know we're not going to call it Ford Brad. That sounds silly. What about Bradford?

I don't like your name going first, but it does sound better. It does sound better. Yeah. What are we naming our town? Jess Dave. Yeah, you can't call it Dave Jess. It's crazy. What about Matt? Matt's not in the town. Oh, the call it Dave. Just crazy. What about Matt? Matt's not in the town? Oh, the man's silent.

Yeah. Silent Matt. The man is in brackets. You wish the man was silent. Most days. Yeah. His father, John, worked for the oil industry in Bradford and moving to find better work led the Waddell family to Prospect, Pennsylvania,

where they lived most of their lives. I mean, it sounds like a good place to move if you're trying to strike it. Prospect? So he wanted to get a better job. He was working in the oil industry. Mate, that's about to boom. Stick it out. I think he was still in the oil industry.

Well, he listened to my advice. And good on him. Good on you. That's how he supported his family. Biographer Alan Levy wrote that Waddell was a decidedly different sort of child. At the age of three, he wandered over to a local fire station and stayed there for several days. Sorry, what?

Okay. No one called his parents. When questioned by Mr. Waddell, the Bradford fireman shrugged, well, Mr. Waddell, he just wandered in a few days ago and seemed to like it here. He's a three year old. Like surely they'd be a bit worried. So he's three years old. He's three years old, he's wandered off.

The parents are probably a bit distressed and the firefighter's like, but he's happy, he's all right. Are they serving him food? Yeah, I'm sure. He's just curled up under a table or something, and like, oh, he loves it. He's not a fucking stray cat, it's a toddler. What are you doing?

People will be worried. Are they like, they're squirting the hose into his mouth at huge pressure? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. My dog's favourite summer activity. I'm sure three year olds like it too. Honestly, yeah. I mean, Goose is four,

but I'm sure he enjoyed it at three too. Yeah, I mean this is four, but I'm sure he enjoyed it at three Yeah, boys a human a human three. I think dogs for the human threes are better intelligence was intelligence wise yet So as a child He did he did okay in school despite hardly ever attending. He is at the fire station Sister was quoted as saying you're not wrong. His sister was quoted as saying, you're not wrong. His sister was quoted as saying, he often missed school, but I could always find him playing ball, fishing or following a fire engine.

He is a dog. Just on foot. Yeah. Fire trucks were one of Waddell's obsessions and he would hear sirens and run after the trucks all the way to the fire to help put it out. That isn't that a dog thing? Don't dogs chase after the after a fire engines? I think cartoon dogs do yeah. Cartoon dogs. Well they're the ones I'm most familiar with. Yeah yeah so is is the big reveal that he is actually a dog?

Oh my god he's a little dog. We'll find out. Well there's nothing in the rule book that says... I was really hoping for it to be a fun twist and like a, oh, and did I forget to mention he's actually a border collie. Imagine I'd done a whole recording about it and I forgot that twist. He's actually a dog. And it sounds like these firefighters are the kind of people that would let him put out the fire. I don't care if he's only six years old. Yeah, that's fine.

He seemed happy to be going into the burning building and pulling out the other survivors. He was doing a good job. I didn't give him a mask to wear or anything, but he's all right. He's fine. We didn't have one that fit him. He's too small.

He's too tiny as a child. We don't have child firefighters. That's crazy. That would be crazy. That would be dangerous. Anyway. He might suffocate in the mask. We can't have that. I can't be liable for that.

So this long-standing fascination with fire trucks would be a recurring theme throughout his adult life. So keep that in the back of your brain somewhere. He didn't have much baseball training throughout his life but he had a very strong muscular body from farming, mining and drilling and helping out in the family farm. And running after fire. And running after fire. He had great cardio. Incredible calves. All this physical work led to him developing a huge physique. Levi writes that by the time he was 13, he could plough with two mules, a measurement we are all supposed to understand.

He could plough. Oh, he could plough with two mules. Bloody hell. Don't the mules do the work for you? Maybe he's supposed to have more mules. Bloody hell. Don't the mules do the work for you? Maybe you're supposed to have more mules. Or is he? And he only had needed two. Is he like one of those strong men

that sort of straps two mules to his back and like plow with them on his back? Yeah, I think if you're trying to like talk up how someone is physically very fit and very strong, just say that. Just say he was really strong. Even by the age of 13, he had the strength of two men. Not like he could plow with two mules.

What the fuck does that mean? I'm a city girl. No, I like that. I think that, yeah, I think that tell it to me in terms like I understand mule terms, ideally. I'm picturing it like, you know, you normally have your like the mules going along, right? And it's dragging the plow behind it. I'm picturing he's able to control two of those at once. You know, like a guy driving two cars somehow.

Doing the splits in between. Just between two. Yeah. That's how I'm picturing it. And I guess that would be, you know, take mental strength as much as anything. Yeah. Yeah. So that doesn't explain his physical strength. I mean, you've got horsepower. Famous. We know that. Yes. Mule power.

Mule power. He's got two mule power. He's got two MPH. So I'm glad we're all on board. Two mules per hour. That this 13 year old's freakishly strong. Two mules per hour. What's he doing to those two mules in an hour, Dave?

Whatever he wants. They've got no say. He is so strong. That is strong. Now I understand how strong he is. Stubborn as a mule, not when this guy's around. That's how strong he is. I think we've gotten lost.

I think we've gotten lost in this. He'd take a mule to water, but he can't make a drink. Well, Rube can. He can make him get in. He can make him go for a bloody dip. We don't like to. Yes, you do. Yes, you do. Get in there He can make him go for a bloody dip. We don't like to. Yes, you do. Yes, you do. Get in there. You stink. OK, Rube.

Throwing bars of soap at him. So he's a strong boy. Very strong. And more importantly, it was during his farming that he truly honed his throwing ability. Throwing bars of soap. During spring plowing, crows would pick at the seeds planted by farmers and young Waddell took to doing his farming with rocks in his pockets to pelt at the birds. Oh, you just have a piff.

Yeah, you have a piff saying, get out of it. Get out of it. That's the Australian version. I don't know what they would have said in their early 19 or late 1800s in the US, but in Australia it would be, get out of it. Oi. Oi, hey, oi. Get out of it. Ah! Ah! No.

Cut it out. No, no. No, cut it out. Get out of it. No. Cut it out. Get out of it. All of our... Beautiful language, beautiful culture. I love it. It's beautiful. So he grew quite adept at throwing stones and shooting guns at the crows. He was an oddity in that he could throw well with either hand.

He shot a gun right-handed, but threw with his left hand. And later in baseball, he would pitch left-handed and bat right-handed. Ah, with a gun? With a gun. He would bat, yeah, they tried to hand him a baseball bat. He said, I'm good.

I'm okay. So when the Waddell family moved to Prospect, they had easy access to Butler. It was the largest city in the area. They were a bit closer to the big city. Waddell's early days saw him struggle socially. Other kids didn't want to play ball with him as he threw so hard it stung their hand. Oh, wow. He's very strong.

He throws very fast. And he also throws bees. And I didn't like that. I'm allergic to bees. I just, I am burning through EpiPens with this guy. He keeps just yelling, go long. He throws a bee. He calls it the stinger.

He throws a bee 40 feet. It's insane. It would be really hard to piff a bee. Yes. Yeah, yeah. If they weren't on board. Like if you're working with them they could do a lot of the work just flapping along but if you were working like oh but that's again he can convince a mule he can convince a B. He's one with the creatures. Yeah next next time you see a bee flying, I threw that. That was because of me. I did that. It's going where I told it to.

Bees kind of need like a they need help. They can't just take off by themselves. They need they need a launch. Once they're going. Oh, they're fine. Yeah, they can't they can't launch. They're like a kid learning to ride a bike. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We are bee training wheels. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we are B training wheels.

Yeah, most Bs, they have, you know, rubes running after them going, no, I've still got you, I've still got you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're doing it, you're doing it. That's all you, that's all you, keep going. That's all you. I distinctly remember taking the training wheels off my bike and riding straight into

a hedge. Where was dad? Well, my parents got me a secondhand bike that was too big for me to get on and off, but they were like, he'll grow into it. So to get off the bike for like the first year of having the BMX, I had to find a bush or something, pull up next to it and then just fall into it. That's how I got off. That's how I got off.

I was going to say. It felt awesome. And how did you dismount the bike? No seat on that bike. It felt so good. Anyway, so the other kids don't want to play with him because he's throwing bees at them and the bees are stinging him. Nevertheless, his raw skill landed him a spot on the butler team. So he's playing baseball now.

Often he would be absent from games without notice. Once a friend pulled up near first base in a buggy and held out a fishing line, asking if Waddell wanted to join. Waddell happily obliged and walked off the mound to leaving mid game. He's quite cute. This guy. He's kind of like, I'm almost imagining like a like a friendly ogre type. Just kind of like friendly, easily distract him. And he's like, oh, he's very tall. Oh, yeah.

Shiny thing. You are. Yeah. That. Yep. You're not wrong. And oafish sort of. Oafish, yes. Harmless oaf. Yes. Isn't it- there's- didn't you tell a story of one? Like, is Mice and Men, Dave, one of your Booktreat episodes, does that have like a- the big guy on that was like a big friendly guy, right?

Oh, yes, Lenny. Lenny. It's got a Lenny vibe. Yeah, it does know his own strength. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But very well meaning. Yes. I would say that that feels in reading about this guy. It feels that sort of vibe. But also, it's interesting because obviously a lot of the writing about him, there was a lot of writing at the time, but more people reflecting on it now.

People just kind of think quite fondly of him because he's this sort of like, not hapless, but he's just sort of like, he does, he gets up to all sorts of things while being a professional baseball player and people kind of like, oh, I just love this guy. Like he's very good at baseball, but he's also just like, he just gets into some crazy stuff. And I talk about this later, but it maybe it's worth mentioning early that through like modern writers and through a modern lens, people kind of go, okay, he probably, it seems like some sort of intellectual disability or autism or ADHD or a combination of the three.

But none of that kind of existed or was diagnosed or recognised or anything back then. So through a modern lens, you kind of go, hmm, I can see where he's sort of being pulled into different things. And he's like, he is easily distracted and off he goes and does something. But it certainly seems like people call him like a they liken him to Forrest Gump a little bit. You know, of just kind of like he's doing a lot of things. He's quite good at things. He's pretty well meaning and he just wants to help people and he gets up to all sorts

of antics. Love it. It's that sort of character. Runs from one adventure to another. Yeah, totally. And it's a bit of fun. Oh, great. So yeah, he left to go fishing.

That happened, I think, on multiple occasions. Again, we don't know much about baseball, but I do think first base, that seems like a particularly, that a particularly important position I've heard of that one. Okay. Hmm, and he's just gone. See ya. Oh and off he wanders and they're like come back He's off Eddie. Eddie Eddie so in 1896 this is a great sentence a Traveling salesman noticed were dell's talent and signed him up to join the local iron and oil league.

And I was like, what? What's a travelling salesman got to do with it? But back in the day, because travelling salesmen were already on the road so much, and this is like, we're talking minor leagues or like just, um, like community team type things. It was just sort of like, if you spot any good talent, let us know. Right. If you're near a baseball field, see anyone good. Yeah, yeah. Sign them up. Sign them talent, let us know. Right. If you're near a baseball field, see anyone good. Yeah. Yeah. Sign them up.

Sign them up. Let us know. Because they're already on the road. So rather than sending out scouts, you just you're just using people who are already traveling anyway. That's right. It feels like that's makes no sense. You assume that doesn't really happen anymore in sport. You don't think like they're pretty well organized, but you still hear about it with like models and actors.

Oh, it was discovered. and it's in America, so I never know what the things mean, but yeah, I was discovered in a JCPenney's. Oh, it was. Yes, they're always at a mall. Yeah. Yeah, I heard about that recently. I was just having lunch and yeah,

got a business card and now I'm- And it's always like a teenager, often teenage girls, and it's a middle-aged person coming up to them and go, it's such a bizarre thing to be acceptable. Wouldn't you, if you're there with your parents, your parents are like, oh boy mate, what the hell do you think you're doing? A middle-aged person coming over to my teenager and being like, you are so pretty.

That's so weird. So pretty. Look how long and thin you are. I'd like to take pictures of you, so pretty. What the fuck? I can imagine you walking up and back and looking fantastic. Do you like to put on nice clothes? What are you talking about? Leave my child alone.

Would you like to come with me? You could be a star. Well, it's so weird, but then you're right. You do hear about actual superstar people. I discovered that way. So, you know know it has worked out for some that's why I go to shopping centers so much yeah you're always waiting just cruising up and down in my in my Sunday best and you strut as well aren't you?

Oh of course or sometimes because you hear it for actors not just models so sometimes I just do a little scene. Monologue of the food court. Just to show my range. Yeah, but you're getting a reputation as a real Karen, but they're all pieces that you're doing to the manager. Yes, it's a character. This is a character to the manager. May I speak to the manager?

And scene. Yeah. You're always doing that. Yeah. So any day now, any day now, traveling salesman to a spot me. George Lucas is hanging out in food courts a lot. If I, if I, um, believe a photo I've seen a bunch of times,

was he having a soup or something? George Lucas in a food court. You see that pop? Well, you got to get to that food court popper I gotta find that Yeah, that's how he he cast Jar Jar Binks was Through and thought now that's interesting. I think Jar Jar Binks. He saw him ordering miso soup and And he said I've got an idea. That might be one of the worst things you've ever done. I've got a Matt's ear recording this from like an Airbnb or something. I assume is there like do you have a housemate?

He would have ordered a mistos Maggie Luke is in the next room and the walls are thin. So um, yeah She'll probably be a little worried about me right now. I can't wait to message Maggie after this. This is very funny. Be like, hey, anything you heard? Anything stand out in what you heard? Incredible. Is that even like how we talked? Yeah, no, it was very good.

But also terrible. Okay, but very bad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Also the worst thing I've ever heard. Also horrific. That's, we'll 100% put that on TikTok. 100%. No question. Yeah, just hanging me out to dry. Also horrific. That's, we'll a hundred percent put that on TikTok. Hundred percent.

No question. Yeah. Just hanging me out to dry. I get you. It's so funny and so bad. And that's where Dougalos sits. Yeah. In the Venn diagram.

That's where we are. That's the Venn diagram. Anyways, he's spotted by a traveling salesman and he's brought into play for the local team, I think in Franklin, 50 miles north of Butler. Players received a few dollars a game, so Waddell was interested. He's like, okay. It was here in Franklin that Waddell earned the nickname Rube as his teammates teased him for his lack of intelligence.

A Rube is like a fool or like a, yeah. That's mean. It is a bit mean. But the nickname would stick for the rest of his life and it seems like it was embraced by Waddell. He's referred to in a lot of articles and stuff as the Rube. The Rube. But I call him Waddell through most of this. The team in Franklin folded soon after, but word had spread about Waddell's talent. Volant College, a local school in Pennsylvania, made Waddell an offer to come and pitch for them. They offered him free tuition, which wasn't much use to a man with very little interest in further education, but they also said they'd

pay him $1 per game, he'd have free room and board and free tobacco. So he was like, uh, hell yeah. That seems cool. You said he didn't have any interest in learning, but you said earlier that he was naturally very good at school. Is that right? Oh, he was all right in like elementary school. I think he did pretty well, but he didn't attend very much. Right.

Gotcha. But then other sources have said he didn't really have much formal education at all. Other sources have said he didn't really have much formal education at all. So, um, some people, I think at the time thought he was a literate, uh, people since have been like, no, no, he could definitely read. He just, I don't think he was interested in going to college. Right. He, there were too many adventures he could go on instead. Especially when you got unlimited tobacco.

Yeah. Imagine that now, that's, that'd be worth absolute fortune, he said. Oh my God. Yeah. I'd be selling everything I get. Oh yeah. Yeah. Imagine that now, that would be worth an absolute fortune, easy. Oh my gosh. Oh my God. Yeah, I'd be selling everything I get. Oh yeah, yeah. While playing for the college, he dominated the field. He averaged 15 strikeouts per game.

Per game? 15 per game. And these are slightly shorter games too. They played seven innings instead of nine and he's striking out 15 players a game. That's an average. It's funny because I think that's impressive. It's gotta be, right? Yeah, it is.

I checked, it is impressive. Yeah, I'm like, that feels crazy. Or is it? They seem to have a lot of batters, but yeah, every innings is only three. So that's like he wipes out five full innings himself. Oh yeah, five of seven. Yeah. Yeah, wow. That's and that's an average.

Yeah. Sometimes it could have been more. So maybe that's why there were four down in the second. He's just got everyone out. I'm still thinking, Bob, that unlimited tobacco. He could just he could open a stall selling it and they just have to keep restocking for him. And it's pure profit. Fuck, that's good. And then like when they bring it over, he could just say, yep, just put it on the shelf over there.

Stack it up nicely for me. Beautiful. Thank you. That's good stuff. I wonder up nicely for me. Beautiful. Thank you. That is. That's good stuff. I wonder if he did that. He should have taken some business classes with his free tuition. And then he'd be absolutely rolling in it. Rolling in it. Good one. Pun King right there.

Thank you. Pun Queen. On more than one occasion, Waddell instructed his teammates to leave the field while he pitched to the next batter because he wasn't going to need their help. Oh wow. And then he'd strike out the batter. It was diabolical and pretty badass. That is... Guys, take five. Oh yeah, I got this guys.

I don't need anyone to catch this. But then it's also widely reported that after he'd end an innings with strikeouts, he would cartwheel or somersault across the pitch to the dugout. Holy shit. So less badass, more kind of cute and wholesome. Whee! Yeah, he's just having fun playing ball and then he's like, la la la la la, off he goes. The crowds must have loved that.

Yes. That's razzle dazzle. Yeah, he's got the razzle dazzle. But your opponents would be so pissed though. He's just struck you out and then he's now cartwheeling? Yeah. Like you're taking your, this game so seriously and he's just having fun? Yeah.

Must be like, shut the fuck up. He's so fucking good and he's just playing, he's just having fun. He's chasing a fucking butterfly at the moment. What's going on? Now he's piffing it. He's piffing that butterfly. Look at that butterfly go. Whoa. That butterfly's on Mars now.

What's crazy? So Major League Scouts caught wind of this eccentric and impressive picture out of Pennsylvania and it wasn't long before he was signed to the Louisville Colonel's in 1897. I did read in one source that two days into his time with Louisville, he got a $50 fine for going out and getting hammered and he didn't like the fine or the fact that he wasn't allowed to get drunk whenever he wanted, so he quit the team. Yeah. It was a fun energy. Waddell's career spanned 13 years across five teams.

This is the Major League teams. Here they are in both chronological order and also ranked best to worst name. Oh, wow. OK. Here we go. It just gets so it worst name. Oh, wow. OK. Here we go. Just get so it gets worse. It gets worse. OK. The Louisville Colonel's. The Pittsburgh Pirates. The Chicago Orphans.

It's going to get worse than that. The Philadelphia Athletics. And the St. Louis Browns. Yeah, you're right. I mean, Orphans is fantastic. But yeah, Browns. Yeah, you're right. I mean, orphans is fantastic. But yeah, Browns. Chicago orphans. Why are you calling your team the orphans?

That's weird. Yeah. Yeah. And then what's your mascot? Yeah. Do you go to an orphanage and just like take the kids out for a day and they're your little mascots? And when they're all like, are we going to your home? No, no, no, God, no. Back to the orphanage. Yuck. Put on the suit and shut up.

And when they sign a new player, they're like, great. Your parents are alive. Well, not so long. About that. Yeah. We have some rules. It must be a team of orphans. Say goodbye. Our billionaire owner is sick, but he pays really well.

He pays really well. And we're a pretty good team, mostly because of grief. Throughout his career, especially in the early years, he ping ponged between the major and minor leagues, sometimes because the major league season was over. Sometimes because he was in trouble with the major league team he was signed to. Sometimes for shits and giggles. He was just kind of doing his own thing. Alan Levy writes, Rube was an absolute terror to hitters. He was a very large man, about six foot two, and he usually weighed around 225 pounds or 102 kilos. He could throw with the velocity of any man who ever played the game. He had unusually large hands, even for

his size. His shoe size was 13. As for his hands, John McGraw noted that Waddell could encircle a baseball with his fingers as the ordinary man could a billiard ball. Waddell could nearly touch his middle finger and thumb around the ball, around the ball's diameter. Middle finger and thumb. That's crazy.

Yeah, that's hard. I've got about the size of a billiard ball going on here. Yeah, I'm not even that. That's crazy. That's crazy. Yeah, that's hard. I've got about the size of a billiard ball going on. Yeah. I'm not even that. Maybe ping pong. That's just to make you do that, um, that secret racer symbol, isn't it? Oh, I thought it was one where you get punched. Oh yeah. Wow. Both. I mean, that should be. Secret racer symbol. That deserves a punch as well.

Anyway, so he's got, he's very tall. He's very strong. He's got huge hands. What a dreamboat. Not his value, but the hands. My goodness. What, what's sexy about big hands, Dave? Oh my gosh.

Think what you could do with them. Yeah. Pick up a can, encircle the can, put the can back down. That's hot. Oh, my God. That is hot. There's like the cool thing about big hands in the bedroom is it makes everything seem small. That's why you want me in there. Oh, my God. Everything looks huge. I don't want to look huge.

Everything looks huge. I don't want to look huge. Everything looks huge. I don't want to look huge. Oh look at the size of this. No I don't know. Wow. That's why you two never made sense. But yet we make it work. Despite. We love despite. that's the thing. That's right. So his his career peaked. His baseball career peaked sort of between the years of 1901 and 1908, mostly under the management of Hall of Fame baseball manager Connie Mack, who was the first to win the World Series three times. Connie Mack is a contender for all time.

Great names. I mean, Connie Mack is good, but his real name is Cornelius McGillicutty. Oh, my God. That sounds like a made up old timey name. McGillicutty. It sounds like a Harry Potter character. You could have given me a hundred ways that that name dismounts and I would never have picked that one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I know. Cornelius McGillicutty. The Wikipedia kind of breaks it down.

They're like, OK, so that his parents were Irish immigrants. And at that time, especially any name that started with Mick was they were all called Mac. Right. So a lot of Irish immigrants had the nickname Mac. And Connie is actually quite a common shortening of Cornelius. So he was called Connie Mac his whole life. But his name's Cornelius McGillicutty. Incredible. So both versions of it are fantastic and really good. Totally different ways.

Um, Mac is a very interesting character. He holds records for the most wins. Three thousand seven hundred and thirty one losses. Three thousand nine hundred and forty eight ties. Seventy six and games managed seven thousand seven hundred and fifty five in Major League Baseball history. Still, he holds those titles. His victory, so his wins is eight 847 more than the second highest,

which is Tony La Russa with 2884. Though, to be fair, I don't know much about baseball, as I said, but I think they do play about 6000 games a year. That's wild, isn't it? It's insane. And this is this is back in the 1900s as well. Wow, so the record may never be broken. Mac managed the Philadelphia Athletics for its first 50 seasons of play, starting in 1901.

Did you say 50? Correct. He was a manager for 50 years. Yes. He was at least part owner from 1901 to 1954 and retired after the 1950 season at age 87. Okay, I will wager that probably will never be broken. That's crazy. Isn't that insane? He was just part of the same 50 years. That's that is ridiculous.

I've just found out why they were called the orphans. If you're interested, it's kind of fun. So they're they were. Can it be fun? They were known as the Colts for a while. But Anson. Then they killed all the Colts parents. The team's manager in first baseman was named Cap Anson, who was nicknamed Pop.

And he was fired from the team. Like he was like the team's dad Pop. So once he he was fired, they started being called the Orphans and that became official for a while. Wow. Wait, it wasn't interesting. I'm sorry. I was wrong. I was wrong. It is interesting to think that they're like, we love that guy so much.

We fired him. Yeah, we're going to change our they're like we love that guy so much. We fired him Yeah, we're gonna change our name based on the lack of him He's no longer here because we fired him, but we love him He goes here. So yeah Mac Mac was a legendary manager in reading a bit about him I think he has a little bit of a Ted lasso about him He seemed to have a real knack for knowing how to get the best out of his players, especially Waddell. Waddell kind of stayed with him the longest. Other managers just couldn't handle him. Max seemed to sort of figure it out.

He wanted his players to strive to be better, not just better players, but also better people. He had this code of conduct that focused on sportsmanship, teamwork, humility and fairness. And the last one on the list is I will always judge a teammate or an opponent as an individual and never on the basis of race or religion, which is impressive to me, given this was the early nineteen hundreds. Yeah, wow.

That's kind of nice. So, yeah, Max seems like a very he's a really interesting character. And he judged them on height and width. That's right. And so he was like this Waddell guy, he might be number one. He's very high and with he's a girthy lad. He's a girthy boy. So anyway, it's 1901 Mac becomes manager of the new Philadelphia athletics.

Prior to managing Philadelphia, Connie Mac had managed the Milwaukee Brewers where he signed Rube for a brief stint. It was here that Mac learned how to get the best out of Rube, basically lean into his outside interests. So Waddell pitched the first game of a doubleheader for Milwaukee and they won and Mac offered Waddell a three day fishing vacation if he agreed to pitch the second game. So he did. He pitched and threw a complete game shutout for the victory.

A shutout is when a single pitcher pitches a complete game and does not allow the opposing team to score a run. Wow. Whoa. And then he headed to Puake, pure key lake to go fishing. That's so nice. This is how they should do it. It's like dangling keys in front of him. Like, Hey, what's this?

You want this? Hey, you pitch a good game. You go fishing. He's like, okay. Yeah. What do you guys know? It'd be a lure. You're like, that should be a little worm on a hook.

That's a good, that's a good system. They should do all work should be done like that. Hey, do a work today, three day trip. I like that. That'd be nice. That'd be nice. We should start doing that. Yeah.

Yeah, do a good report and you know, you get to go wherever you want. Skiing. Home. It could be fun. Can I go home? Oh yeah. Woo.

I think that's our current system. Yeah. And it's a perfect system. It is a good system. What's this? 491 great reports in a row. And we have little holidays every week. We are bankrupt.

So yeah, that's how they worked together at the Brewers. They were reunited a year later in 1902 when Connie Mack, now in Philadelphia, was desperate for a pitcher. And when he learnt that Waddell was pitching in California, he dispatched two Pinkerton agents to sneak Waddell back into Philadelphia, where he led the Philadelphia Athletics to the 1902 American League crown. And now I don't know why it required Pinkerton agents to go get him, why he couldn't just say, like write him a letter and say, come to Philadelphia.

I couldn't find much information on why that was the case, why he had to sneak out of California. But I thought it was so funny that he he got two detectives to go get him. He doesn't need an escort. I think that's kind of funny. And previous topic as well. Your previous topic as well wasn't it, Papa? Mm hmm. Yeah. Much later, Mack described Waddell as the atom bomb of baseball long before the atom

bomb was discovered. So what did that mean to him? Not sure. This is later he described it. So the atom bomb did exist by then. This won't mean anything to you, but I think he's more like an atom bomb. What are you talking about? What are you talking about?

It'll make sense. That's a time traveler. That was right in sync to me, Dave. It probably sounded like three weeks later to you. Yeah, that's right. You are a time traveler and you're very behind. I've time traveled backwards slightly. Half an hour.

And so began the Rubes most successful era. From Wikipedia in his prime, Waddell was the game's premier power pitcher with 302 strikeouts in 1903. 115 more than runner-up Bill Donovan. Whoa. So he's like, he's very good. Geez. Bill Donovan's lucky to get a mention even.

But yeah, we added that out actually. AJ added out that guy's name. I've just deleted him from my brain that's a wasted space. Let's not bring the podcast down. We're losers. Waddell followed that season with 349 strikeouts in 1904 110 more than runner-up Jack Chesbro. Oh delete. No other picture compiled consecutive 300 strike seasons until Sandy Koufax in 1965 and 66. Alright, that's a name worth remembering. Remendering.

Remendering. That's a name worth remembering. Honestly, I'm going to remember that name forever. Yeah, yeah. Sandy Koufax. I have heard of Sandy Koufax. I always assumed that was like the name of a TV detective or something. It does sound more like a detective than a baseball pitcher.

Yeah. And Kofax is K-O-U-F-A-X. I did not realise that. Me either. His 1905 season with the Athletics was his best season in which he had 26 wins, 287 strikeouts. And this was his only season where he would have had the chance to play in the world series. But unfortunately he injured his shoulder while rough housing with a teammate and

had to sit out the rest of the season. Cause they're on the road a lot. They were like, they caught the train. They were waiting at a train station for a new train. They were roughhousing over this straw hat. Hey, give it to me. No, it to me. It's mine.

Just the phrase rough housing is so funny. It's very funny. But I'll wrestle you for it. This injury later led to speculation over many years since that Waddell was actually bribed or paid off to fake the injury and thus not play in the series. And that would make more sense. Well, that swelled for quite some time, but Connie Mack refused to believe this

theory. He said, that's ridiculous. Um, from John Thorn's, our game a blog more than a hundred years later, Waddell's Mark is still the best by any American league left-hander in 1955 at age 93, Connie Mack called Rube the greatest pitcher in terms of pure talent he had ever seen, and Connie had seen them all. Yeah, that's incredible. Yeah. And it sounds like the result would have been different if he played right.

He was a freak. If he plays, they win sort of thing. Yeah, I reckon. Yeah, like he's yeah, he does seem like a real freak of nature with his talent and just the power and speed of his pitches. It's like it's so hard to return them. And it's I think it's just nice because like he gets up to so many antics that I'm about to talk about. But it's it's nice that it wasn't like he was a hopeless player or anything or he was just average.

He was freakishly good at baseball and he did some of this wild shit I'm about to mention. Yeah, that's awesome. Because just the name by itself you think, oh, he's probably hopeless at all aspects. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or like he can hit a curveball really well, but nothing else. You know what I mean? But he's just, yeah, he is actually a very good player. The pitches, why do they keep throwing curveballs at him? We know that's all he can hit. Just lob it up. Just do anything else.

So it's undeniable that he was a very impressive baseball player, but he's also famous for many of his off field antics. So in 1903, that was a big year for him. He managed to cram a lot in, including an appearance in a touring melodrama. What? Was he spotted in a shopping center? The show was called The Stain of Guilt. Oh my God.

Oh my God. I don't want to look at that stain. We've all been there. No matter what color it is, it's awful. Well, yeah, you use a black light to find it. That was a big part of the plot. One source said it was critically acclaimed. Others say that the audience loved it, but critics fucking hated it.

But regardless, it was well attended. His performance was very notable in that his co-stars realised he was incapable of memorising his lines, and so they just let him improvise his lines for every show. Every show is different. Fantastic. Again, he could read but like he just couldn't remember the lines so they're like just make it up. Say whatever you want. Say whatever you want. But then they stick to the scripts and it just doesn't make any sense? Yeah and they're just having... that would then essentially mean they have to improv as well. Yeah but if you don't improv it's even better. Yeah Hi, how are you today? I'm a seahawk. Oh good to hear. I'm well, thank you

Uh-huh Your mother did what? A huge discussion point amongst punters was the scene in which Waddell's character lifted the actor playing the villain and threw him across the stage with ease. The audience, fuck him up. Give him the chair. I'm imagining like overhead, just like fully picking up another fully grown man and throwing him. The villain was a caterpillar.

I assume this was a written scene or maybe it was just one of his classic improvs. I hope it was written and the actor knew it was about to be thrown. Otherwise, that would be terrifying. Just go with it. Go with it. Just go with it. Now, we're about to talk about it on our Patreon Only podcast, Phrasing the Bar, because it's back for one special episode because the phrase was in one movie last year called Brothers and Peter Dinklage is also in the movie and he just gets

absolutely thrown across the room into a bath. And it just shatters the tiles. That's exactly what I'm imagining him doing to an actor. Yeah. Thrown by Fraser's character as well. That's right. So maybe Fraser could play the Rube. Oh, my God. I mean, Fraser's a tall man. He's a he's just like strong man. I reckon he could. Yeah. Get him in there.

I don't know if the Rube had quite the same hotness level of the phrase. But, you know, I believe in the phrase's performance. He can he can like through his performance, he can make himself uglier. Through his performance or prosthetics, if it has to be. No, no, no. Purely through his performance. I don't know. I don't know if he can act that good to make himself rude repulsive I Never said rubes repulsive. Okay, great

Just not as hot as like George of the jungle Brendan Fraser cuz who the fuck is yeah, that's fair But I mean Hollywood they always you know, they cast a hottie in every role. That's true I think people would accept it. I'll probably be played by Emma Watson or something. Yeah, you know, I'm looking at him now. He's he's a he's a pretty I reckon he's not not a bad match for the phrase. Mm hmm. I reckon phrase could play him for sure. Obviously have to age him down a little bit for the three year old scenes.

No, I could do it. They're getting really good with the aging down stuff. So I think we know that the phrase can play a baseball with freakish talent because he's already done that in the movie. And I definitely remember that movie. Yes. And that was called The Scout. The Scout, also starring. The famous. Albert Alvord.

Yes. And he was kind of. The Hammock District. Is that based on the Rube? I don't know. He was kind of he was not a super intelligent dude, but he was like this discovered maybe in, I don't know, playing in South America or something. I'm starting to think I didn't watch this movie at all.

I can remember one scene of it. Anyway, don't get distracted on a thing we've already talked about many years ago. Because I have. I'm sorry. Rubish, aren't we? I can see both of you on your computers looking up this film.

I've got more to talk about this play and more antics he gets up to. But no, you let me know when you're ready. Sorry, someone just asked if I wanted to go fishing. I'm closing the laptop. Sorry, Bob, I just said a siren. Go fast. So during the run of The Stain of Guilt, another classic Waddell antique happened.

So on the night of Tuesday, October 26th, Waddell missed that night's performance in Chicago to go see a rivaling show that featured lions. At some point during the show, Waddell became mad at one of the lions and punched it. In retaliation, the lion bit Waddell on his left hand, his pitching hand. Oh no. Luckily it wasn't too significant and it fully healed, but he went to a play. He went to a show that had lions in it. He got mad at a lion.

He punched a lion. The lion bit him. Jesus. And this is while he should have been on stage at a rival show yeah I'm not sure there was an understudy for his character he just wasn't there and the next day they're like Rube where were you I got bit by a lion okay Rube fuck me it'd be the same as during a game him going to watch you know he's meant to be playing for the New York Mets. He goes and watches the Yankees play and gets bitten by a New York cop or something. Same thing.

He wasn't just good at baseball either. He had a crack at some other sports as well from Wikipedia. It says shortly after the 1902 baseball season, reports indicated Waddell would play for Connie Mack's athletics football team. However, it wasn't quite meant to be. Mack later said there was a little fellow from Wanamakers who asked for a job of quarterback. I don't think he weighed more than 140 pounds.

Well, the first practice, Waddell tackled him and broke his leg. It was the first inkling John and I had that players could be badly heard in football. We got Rube out of there without delay. He was supposed to be pretty good, but we never found out. He's just too big and strong and... I mean, I think that'd be really good when playing oppositions. Just don't get him to do it to your own players. Exactly.

So, Waddell returned to his family home in Pennsylvania and played with local football clubs there. He played with various football teams in his later years and also had a brief stint as a goalkeeper in the St. Louis Soccer League. So he also had a crack at soccer for a bit too. Wow. Ha ha ha. That's like the opposite being a goalie of a pitcher.

I know, there's a lot going on. He can do it all. I think he just likes to play. And he could probably, he could catch the, his huge hands would be pretty. Yeah. Pretty handy. And he's tall and he's broad that, his huge hands would be pretty, yeah, pretty hand, handy. And he's tall and he's broad. So it's sort of like, yeah, he can cover a lot of space.

Stand there with it. You're doing jumping jacks. You wouldn't be able to get it past him. Easy. There's also just a lot of stories that go around about Rube that don't have much information on them, but they come up in multiple sources and they're often used to sort of bolster this image of a strange and funny character. Some are kind of cute and silly, some are genuinely very impressive, some are a bit

baffling. So I've given these the title of one sentence antics and I have a few of them here. I think this happened mostly in minor leagues, but fans began to notice that Waddell could be easily distracted, so they would bring puppies to the game, hold them up for him to see and he'd wander off the field to go play with puppies. He also, as Dave alluded to before, sometimes they would just bring shiny things and they'd be like, get, get the light on, get the sunlight on it.

And he'd be distracted and go off to look at the shiny thing. Actually happened. Yes. So like crowds are noticing that he's easily distracted. So they're bringing stuff to distract him. And there's just hundreds of puppies in the crowd. But how cute is that? That they're like, look, we've got a puppy. And he's like, Ooh, they're bringing stuff to distract him. So there's just hundreds of puppies in the crowd. But how cute is that? That they're like, look, we're having a puppy. And he's like, oh, and he wants to go play with a puppy.

It's very sweet. Yeah, it's a great promotional tool, right? But even even his rich and weird boss, who orphans all the all these players, they must still be like, this is great. This is getting punters in. We can charge the puppies for tickets. You know, like you could make a fortune. Yeah, yeah, yeah. An extra dollar for a puppy ticket.

As we mentioned, he also had a longstanding fascination with fire trucks and run off the field to chase after them during games on multiple occasions. His interests, like we said before, seemed to be less about fire trucks themselves and more about wanting to help, which is quite nice, but yeah, he would be mid game, hear a fire truck and off he'd run. They need me. While on the road playing baseball, he was sharing a room with teammate Ossie Schreckengost.

Oh my God, that's incredible. Ossie Schreckengost. Ossie Schreckengost. As you know, so they're sharing rooms as was customary. Schreckengost later refused to share the room until a contract clause was created, which would bar Waddell from eating crackers in bed. It's too crummy in here. I can't sleep.

He's eating crackers in my bed. You can't eat crackers in bed anymore, Rube. This feels like a guy who reads the fine print of a contract too. Yeah, definitely. It's like, well, if it says it in the contract, why don't they put in the contract, you can't be distracted by shiny things as well. Yeah, and then we're fine. He gained more fame as well for saving the lives of people inside a department store

when he picked up a burning oil stove that had overturned and carried it out of the building before it could start a fire. In a department store? Yep. Again, one sentence antics. Nobody gives any fucking information on that, but just that it was almost a fire and then there wasn't a fire because of him. I reckon this is, that's probably what he did to be discovered for Cumstain the musical or whatever.

No, the Stain of Regret. Stain of Guilt? Stain of Guilt. The first thing I said was clearly not right. Cumstain? No, I don't think the play was called Cumstain. Cumstain the musical. Oh, there's a melodrama coming to town. Do you want to go see it? Yeah. Get tickets to come stay. Would you? I'd I'd shorten it in my mind and I forgot to retranslate it to the real one before saying it out loud. And that's on me. He would also disappear for months at a time during the off season,

and it was not known where he went until it was discovered that he was wrestling alligators in a circus. What the fuck? Yeah. Again, nobody gives any information about the circus, about when this was, but that's what he was doing. Wrestling alligators is wild enough. Yeah, but you're not a circus. In a circus is such a funny way to end that sentence. I guess it'd be weirder if he just did it. He just went to swamps by himself. Yeah.

I guess that's how Steve Irwin made a career. But look how that turned out. Oh, it's such a very successful crew. Yeah, really iconic. Dan O'Brien writes, the Rube also demonstrated his more compassionate side when athletic center fielder Danny Hoffman was knocked unconscious by a fastball to the temple. Oh. Someone went for an ambulance and the players crowded around in aimless bewilderment, wrote

Connie Mack. Somebody said that Danny might not live until the doctor got there. Then the man they called the Playboy and Clown went into action, pushing everybody to one side he gently placed Danny over his shoulder and actually ran across the field. Rube flagged down a carriage which carted the pair to the nearest hospital and Rube, still in uniform, sat at Hoffman's bedside for most of the night and held ice to Hoffman's head. So he's like, ambulance isn't going to get there in time. I'm big. I'll just carry him.

Very nice. He can use his two mule powers. That's that's my god. I love this guy. Yeah. He's quite lovable. This is feels all very memorable. How have I forgotten all of this?

I don't remember any of that. Yeah. Yeah. You know, yeah, we've already established you were asleep during the sleep podcast. That's probably it. Yep. Speaking of being lovable, he was married at least three times, although made remarks along the lines of losing track of how many wives he had.

There were definitely three that we know of. Following the 1899 season, Rube made a brief return to Columbus where he married Florence Dunning. Florence received a divorce from Rube in 1901 on the grounds of gross neglect of duty. I don't know who was neglecting who there, but they divorced. Dan O'Brien again writes in June of 1903, he was married for the second time, this time to a Massachusetts girl named Mae Wynn Skinner, who he had met three days earlier. Mae Wynn.

Mae Wynn. She may win. It was the beginning of a very stormy relationship. The marriage lasted nearly seven years, but the couple only infrequently lived together. And Mrs.

Waddell often had her husband jailed for non-support. Oh. How's he going to support you if he's in jail? It's true. It's tricky. I mean, he's got to get out there to wrestle some alligators.

He's got to wrestle some alligators. The tumultuous marriage to May Winskiner only exacerbated his drinking problem. They divorced in 1908 and in 1910 he married wife number three, 19 year old Madge McGuire. Not much is written about his marriage to Madge other than it was also pretty tumultuous and his issues at home plagued him on the field as well. Apparently he passed out in the middle of a game against New York in 1909. So three marriages that we know of possibly more, but all pretty

stormy, a bit tumultuous. By the 1908 season, not quite the dominant force he once was. Rube was still a box off Bonanza. As Matt was saying before, like this guy is filling stadiums. He paid for himself in three games after he was bought, wrote St. Louis post-dispatch columnist John L. Ray. He'd added many thousands since that time, paid admissions that would never have arrived at the gate but for the fact that Rube was scheduled to work.

When he was playing for the Browns, they enjoyed a 48% boost in home attendance to more than 618,000. Wow. So people are turning up to see this guy. And is he getting paid okay? I think so, yeah. Okay, he's getting, he's not on Is he getting paid? Okay, I think so. Yeah, he's getting he's in on the right contract now Yeah, I think so. Yeah, you know back in the day It was like free smoke and a dollar a game and he was like this is the best

Yeah, that was when he was like playing at a college level. This is like major league baseball So I'm sure he's doing okay. You can distract with a shiny object. Maybe they are taking advantage of yeah, you're right It'd be rife for exploitation Gold pieces, you know, yeah. Yeah, I can give you 50 grand a game or I could give you this little plastic jewel I've got Mean that's how my husband got me Shiny jewel. What's he offered you a lot of cash and you took a jewel I took the jewel like a fucking idiot.

Never take the jewel. So shiny. Oh my God. So he's he's he was quite a big drinker through all that through his whole life as well, as we kind of alluded to before with like getting getting in trouble for being out on the piss. But his alcohol use began to erode his relationships with his athletics teammates. Shrek and Gost, his one time friend who regularly went drinking with him and went fishing, squabbled with both Waddell and Mack for being treated differently for the same

offences. So Waddell would sort of get away with stuff that others wouldn't. He's like, I'm not allowed to eat crackers in bed. Look at him go. It's unbelievable. He's had two boxes. I can't go fishing and go out on a piss, but he can. This and other incidents led to Waddell's release from the team in 1910. So it was kind of it was a slow thing.

And I'll explain as well that he he wasn't super well, but there's kind of a bittersweet reason as to why. So after his major league career was over, Waddell pitched for parts of three or more years in minor leagues, including a 20 win season for the Minneapolis Millers in 1911 and pitching for the Minneapolis Rough Riders and the Virginia Ore Diggers in 1913. So many great names. So good.

Rough Riders. Hell writers. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. All right. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. But by that 1913 season, his health was declining and he'd lost a lot of muscle and he was no longer that muscular, long, long limbed hero of the prior decade. And that's because while training with the Millers in the years before, Waddell helped save the city of Hickman, Kentucky, from a devastating flood in the spring of 1912.

He held back a flood. Basically. Wow. He was a dyke. He just stood there and dammed the river. Yeah. He was a levy himself. One man levy. River be damned, he said. Yeah.

And that'll take away a lot of your muscle mass. Yeah, it's pretty draining. No, basically he got pneumonia from standing for hours in icy waters up to his armpits, placing sandbags in advance of rising waters. Oh, legend. The pneumonia drained him quite badly. And when a second flood hit the town, he was once again out there in the cold water to help. So by 1913, he was thinner, less muscly, generally not very well.

Soon after he was diagnosed with tuberculosis and moved to live closer to his sister in San Antonio, Texas. His health never really recovered and he was placed in a sanitarium in nearby Elmendorf until he died at the age of 37. No. On the 1st of April 1914. So some people do mention that he was born on Friday the 13th and he died on April Fool's Day. Oh my gosh, what does it all mean? But so, like, he packed all of that into quite a short life. Yes.

37 years. And yeah, he died from an illness he sustained helping people. Oh, my. Wow. Pretty amazing. What a legend. Pretty cool. Yeah, I don't know. I'd heard like, I think this is a story that gets told a bit on different podcasts and stuff. And I just seen the name. I've even told the story.

I always thought I didn't realise it was like this noble sort of beautiful soul. Yeah. But he. Yeah, it seemed like his his nickname undersells him. Yeah, totally. And it's so of the time, isn't it, that people are just focusing on that he's a bit of an idiot. But like I was saying before, more through a more modern lens or with the information we have now, people like, I don't think he wasn't stupid. He might, he might've had other, uh, yeah, either intellectual disabilities, or

he was on an autism spectrum or he had ADHD or like something that meant that he was, you know, easily distracted or off just doing next things or was onto the next adventure and wasn't like super focused, but it, easily distracted or off just doing next things or was onto the next adventure and wasn't like super focused. But I think there's also that sort of Forrest Gump comparison that he's like quite, he seems like quite a sweet, well-meaning person. And I think that's really cool. I don't think you would have any of those things.

Well, they didn't, they didn't happen back in my day. No, no, no, you're right. That's a, that's a, every second person's got something now, don't they? Yeah. It's all a scam. Uh, big, big medicine. Um, made it all up. It's like we saw a big spike in left handedness.

Yeah. You know, once we stopped hitting kids for being left handed. Yeah. Ridiculous. So that, well, did you take the same west end of that as me? Keep hitting kids. Keep hitting kids for being left-handed. Yeah. Ridiculous. So that while did you take the same western out of that as me? Keep hitting kids. Keep hitting kids. Keep forcing the right hand. With your right hand. Any parents who hit with their left hand should be hit. Yep. Because that's the devil's hand. Yeah. Hit them with God's hand. The Jesus hand. Jesus was right handed, right? Yeah.

Jess, that is how do you even ask that question? Of course. Sorry. Sorry. It's been a while since I left my Catholic high school. Um, so yeah, sadly, all good things must come to an end. And he, he died at 37. He was elected to the baseball hall of fame in 1946 by the veterans committee that looked to enshrine a number of players from his era and the previous century, who He was elected to the baseball hall of fame in 1946 by the veterans committee that looked

to enshrine a number of players from his era and the previous century who had contributed to the growth of the game. One of Waddell's contributions was that he was perhaps the greatest drawing card in the first decade of the century. A man whose unique talent and personality drew baseball fans around the country to ballparks. Nice. So people came out in flocks to see him play. And yeah, he, he packed a lot into a short life and we love to tell those stories here because it's always very interesting.

But there you go. That is the story of Rube Waddell. What a guy. What a life. I mean, I've never been to a baseball, like a professional baseball game, but if he, you know, like that's the kind of guy that would bring out even sort of semi interested fans of baseball, right? Totally. Oh, like if there was a chance of me seeing a player and also a chance of me seeing other people distract that player with a bunch of puppies. I'm going to that game. I'm going for the puppies.

I'm taking a puppy. Yeah. They need to bring bring that back. I mean, even just have it as as, you know know, like, even if they don't have that naturally, like an easily distracted nature, get them, just, you know, get them to play the part. Like you have to be a bit distracted by, you know, make it more like WWE or whatever. Yeah, make it more like the Harlem Globetrotters. That's right. A bit of razzle dazzle.

Do some tricks. Isn't it? Harlem Globetrotters. Yes. Right. A bit of razzle dazzle. Do some tricks. Isn't it? There is a league over there called like the Banana League or something that I think is a bit like that. Banana ball, banana baseball. And it's all just like fireworks and real hectic baseball stuff. Because I think it is quite a boring game if left to its own devices.

I enjoyed it. I went to a baseball game and enjoyed it. I had a great time. Where did you go? Great question. Yankee Stadium. Oh, fair to that. A lot of fun. But we got in the lift at our hotel afterwards and a couple got in and they were American

and they said, you know, what have you been up to? And we said, we just went to a baseball game and the guy of this couple was like, oh yeah, they've changed the rules. I think Aidan said, like, I expected it to be kind of a bit slower and a bit more boring. The guy was like, oh, they've changed the rules. So it moves a bit quicker now. And then I've just repeated that back to people every time people talk about baseball. I said, well, they changed the rules. It moves pretty quick. It's got a good flow now.

Yeah, it flows pretty well. So it was actually, I loved it. It was really fun. It was more fun than going to a football game now. Yeah, it flows pretty well. So it was actually, I loved it. It was really fun. It was more fun than going to a football game there. Oh, great. Dare I say. Okay, cool. I should really, you know, the Melbourne team

played just out of town and then you can, there's like a party level where you can go up on the stand and I think your ticket is open bar and stuff like that. I remember we should go, I'd love to go see a game there. That's wild. Wow. The party bar. Oh, I think it's something like that. Yeah. That's fine.

You two love to party. So maybe we party is big party is. Is there a puppy level? Yeah, I'd pay for that. I'd pay for the puppy. They should do it. is wasted on me. But if there's a puppy day, I'd be into that for sure. Puppies would never be wasted on me.

Yeah, we should pitch that to them as an idea. The puppy bar, open puppy bar. You can go in and just pet as many puppies as you want. You see those celebrity interviews where they're just like they're answering questions while surrounded by a whole litter of puppies. Fuck, that's a dream. I also have somehow never seen this. Really? That sounds like something that would have made by AI or something.

You haven't been fooled, have you? It's so cute and fun. But then I wonder what do they do with the puppies? What's it? Why is that happening? No, you know, they're just like, you can't just have an interview anymore. It's got to have an element of difference and it's got to be interesting.

So it's like, there's a guy who interviews people on roller coasters and they answer questions about their new TV show while on a roller coaster. Ah, this is just their answer questions while they're holding puppies. Does your algorithm have you on the, that guy doing hot takes on trains? Oh yeah, 100. Love that guy.

He says stuff like that as well. Everything is like 100 percent agree or no. 100 percent disagree. That's just how young people speak, Matt. I know that's confusing for you, but he's not a young. Is he a young person? Younger than you? Is he? Bloody hell. Canonically or IRL either.

Yeah, to both. Well, just what a tale and what a tale well told. But that brings us to everyone's favorite section of the show, where we thank and appreciate some of our fantastic supporters who get involved via patreon.com slash dugongpod. And you can do that too. You might be sitting there going, oh, no, is there like some sort of a cool gatekeeper person there waiting to stop me from entering? No. If you're interested, you're cool enough. That's the rule. You're also hot, by the way. Yeah, there's no cool or hot test. If you're interested, you're cool enough. That's the rule. You're also hot, by the way.

Yeah, there's no cool or hot test. If you're interested, you're automatically cool enough and hot enough. It's like magic. If you're hearing this and going, I'm not interested. Well, we've got some bad news for you. You're cool and hot. Wait, no, if they're not interested. If you're not interested, you're ugly and and and a loser.

You're an ugly loser. And that doesn't. Why have you listened to this fucking long? If you're just an a loser. You're an ugly loser. And that doesn't. And also, why have you listened to this fucking long if you're just an ugly loser? And that that that's different from being interested, but not in a position to afford it. That that that's a different thing entirely. Yeah, you're mega cool and super hot. Yes, that's right. That that's that's the interest. It's if you're sitting here going, oh, whatever, I knew all of that. Oh, this.

You know what? I didn't like it when they got tangents. I don't like the girl one. You're a fucking fugly loser. Yeah. Fuck off. Yeah. If you ever think about commenting on a clip or something saying, oh, the girl, could she just stop talking for a minute? Then you are you were repulsively ugly. You make me want to say you were. Yeah, I will stop talking to throw up at the mere side of you, you fugly loser. How about that?

Yeah. Fuck off, you misogynistic, fugly fuck. At the thought of you, you're disgusting. Dave gave me a look before that either implied I'd gone too far or he was a bit worried about me. Or maybe both. Sorry, I zoned out for a second there. I was just on our YouTube, sending out some comments.

Oh, what were you saying? No, two thumbs up from me. I was definitely thinking that was Dave sort of zoning out and zone Back in going wait. Where are we? What's happening? I'm zoned out for one second. Jess is yelling you fugly loser I don't know what's happening. I'm like if you're looking at me Or is this is this hypothetical just if she actually have you got me. I'm not sure trying to defend myself So anyway, yeah those people to one side. This is all about the hot, cool people who are involved at patreon.com slash stugornpod.

There's a bunch of different levels. You can get different things depending on where you are, including heaps of bonus episodes. I think that what is there over 250 now, Dave? Yeah, 250 plus there's D&D campaigns, there's bonus episodes, there's quizzes, there's am I a Dead Woman? There's so many fun things to unlock. There's also Am I a Dead Woman?

That's on there too. That's on there too. Yeah, that was a mistake. But you've got to pay more for that. There's also a Matt Remembers, some of his home videos. And yeah, there was the original Who Knew It with Matt Stewart, and a bunch of fun stuff there. There's also, like, you can vote for the topics. Something like two out of three topics,

Block makes that a bit more confusing, but it's something like two out of three topics, voted on by the listeners. Was Rube voted on by the listeners, Boppa? Absolutely was, yeah, and I put up four topics. Rube had over 50% of the votes. OK, that's a landslide. It was a landslide. Yeah.

You're not having to go to second preferences there. If we did have a system that included second preferences. Yeah. Sometimes I just I pull up for the vote and then I just choose what I want. That's the second preference. Yeah, mine. And that's the powerful one. In this case, I did do the report on what the people wanted and they voted That's a joke that is a joke But yeah, this is what that was serious

Guess what you are a Fugly loser and nobody ever wants to touch you with a ten-foot pole you fugly loser you're the type of person who goes uh this podcast which very clearly markets itself as a comedy podcast hosted by three comedians well two comedians and one former comedian and uh but i don't but i don't think they take this very seriously fuck off you fugly loser what a way to find out that jess no longer considers me a comedian. That's rude. And to that, they'd say something like, oh, comedy podcast are meant to be funny. Jess, what do you say to that?

I'll say, well, I'm confused by this now. I've got myself all rolled up. And I'm needing a break. So this section of the show is like, there's also the nicest kind of the internet, which genuinely it's the only reason. I think we're keeping Metta afloat basically. It's the only reason so many people still have Facebook accounts, including me probably. But that's a really fun thing as well.

You get access to all that. And the other thing, if you're in the Sydney Schoenberg level or above, you get to be involved in the fact, quote or question section, which is a section of the show we're about to do that has a jingle go something like this. Fact, quote or question. Ding. He always remembers the ding.

She always remembers the ding. She always remembers the ding. I have to get that bell serviced. I was far getting some WD-40 on this, Jesus. Okay. Ding. No. Let's know. I've had a cold over the last couple of weeks

and it's really hit my falsetto high register. Well, if you're coming up with excuses like that, let me tell you one thing. You're a fugly loser. So on, for this section, people on the level of Sydney Schomburg Memorial level or above get to give us a fat quote or question or brag or suggestion or really whatever they like. And then I read out a few of them on the show.

I read them out for the first time. Well, I will do that right now. And they also get to give themselves a title. First one this week comes from the silly-eyed Missile Man himself, Pete Holburton, and I hadn't read ahead, who's given himself the title of wannabe silly-eyed Missile Man. I'll take that wannabe away. You are to me.

You're our silly-eyed Missile Man. Big time. Pete writes, Hi hi legends quick space related fact for you. He said I've got a reputation to keep after all. The first satellite that the French launched was called Asterix after the comic book character. Guess it makes sense as Asterix comes from asterisk which comes from the Greek for little star. Hope you're all well, and as usual, thanks for all the laughs and learning. Cheers, Pete. Pete.

Love that, and I love that if that's one of those things where you'd say that to the French people, they go, yeah, yeah, I guess that's why we did it. Yeah, yeah, definitely, definitely. Yeah, we knew that we looked into the Greek, or if they were like, Astrix is famous. I like cartoon Vikings, or whatever he is. He's a goll. Jess Jess you're calling that fun fact?

Yeah, it's pretty fun. Dave you're calling that a dull fact? No, I mean I I like to just defer to Jess and say yeah. I find it funny if she's approving I'm allowed to say it aloud. And I will say if you're listening and you do think that's a dull fact. If you're listening and you do think that's a dumb fact. Yes. Let me tell you one thing. Look in the mirror and repulse yourself because you're fugly. And then turn to your no friends because you don't have any because you're a fucking loser.

I'll say as well, Pete is in the nicest corner of the internet and he said he's coming to see my show, Bad Boy at the Melbourne Comedy Festival on the 11th. So if you want to meet this Gilead Missile man Jesus I'll just bring up the ticket list for who's coming to my show and I'll give out their details as well Yeah, I'm just gonna dox everyone I'm not really he said it publicly in that group. I guess it's not publicly then is it? But anyway, we're me and Peter gonna have a drink after if you want to join us. The 11th of April.

Opening it up to everyone. Pete wanted a private drink with Matt. I'm going back to Pete's house. His address is of course. Pete's going to drive me in his car. His registration number is. That's right. Just tap on the back window. We'll let you in. We've got three extra spots in the back.

If you're running late, his mobile number is... Send him a text. Thank you, Pete, that was great, love that fact. That's the kind of fact that I think I could even remember, which I like as well. Next one comes from Paul Mellor, whose title is Old Man from Oldham with an old quote. I'm looking forward to this. I haven't had a quote for a little while. Yeah, I had a quote.

Paul, if you want his details. So Paul has written. I mean, Paul's doxers himself all the time. If you follow him on social media, this is going to sound like I know all these people personally. But that's kind of happened with the patrons a little bit. But he posts photos on his daily walks. I'm like, I reckon I could figure out exactly where you live. Triangulating the sun.

In the middle of paradise. It's near a forest anyway. I'm onto your Paul. I'm on your scent. Paul has a quote writing, this quote is engraved on the floor outside of Oldham's historic town hall. It reads, we shape our buildings, thereafter they shape us, and was said by Sir Winston Churchill in the House of Lords in 1943. Churchill was arguing that the shape of the original House of Commons chamber in the UK Parliament was a key factor in the development of the country's democratic process. It was being rebuilt after the Blitz in World War II. He believed that the chamber's rectangular pattern was responsible

for the two-party system that is the foundation of British parliamentary democracy, so they went with that in the rebuild. However, I'd like to think it it literally is about how they shape us as people, as many who work in the House of Commons couldn't run a path. Never mind a country. Maybe that ship hasn't been very successful. I thought it was been really patriotic. And it I'm like, this is very sincere. Oh, he's leading up to laying the slippers in to the political class.

I like that you can run a bath. Yeah. Perhaps we should knock it down and go with something wild to mix it up a bit. Maybe a pyramid. What do you reckon? Anyway, go Saints. Cheers, Paul. Thank you, Paul. Have you seen footage of the lower house in the UK? Because it's obviously it's big. They pack them in.

They sit side by side like sardines and then they yell at each other, which is incredible. And then they used to have the I think he's retired now, the old speaker who was trying to keep, you know, everyone in check. Any John Burkow, I think his name was. He used to speak like this. Order, order, order, order. That's a nightmare job. Order.

Just mediating fucking fully grown toddlers. Yeah, it's awesome. But yeah, I reckon if we stacked them up like a pyramid, that'd be great. Look, becomes its own echo chamber. Yeah. Thank you, Paul. Like that very much. Next one comes from Tamara Potts, whose title is beer.

And Tamara's got a fact writing the beer pioneer is freaking awesome. Well, I like this fact. I told my husband, it's like Stanley Tucci is searching for Italy. And he laughed at me, then got really serious and said that it was exactly like that. That's the kind of dynamic my husband and I have where I say something, he laughs at me, I give him a death stare and he goes, no, absolutely.

So funny, I was going gonna say the exact same thing. Please don't be mad at me. That's so funny. That's kind of like this. It's not kind of like it at all. It's exactly like it. And she finishes saying, we're having beers and watching the first episode now.

Love, love, love it. Oh, thank you so much, Tamara. Yeah, that's now, that's available worldwide on the YouTube channel, the Beer Pioneer YouTube channel. And I mean, I feel so much, Tamara. Yeah, that's now that's available worldwide on the on the YouTube channel, the Beer Pioneer YouTube channel, and I mean, I feel so removed from it. Obviously, I hosted and stuff, but I think so much of why it's good has nothing to do with the crew was just so great. And Shane, who's show it, you know, his idea

has just put together a really fun thing, I think. So, yeah, thanks so much for watching tomorrow. That's very nice. He laughed at me, then got really serious and said it was exactly like that. It's exactly like that. Matt, what about pitching season three, the beer pie an ear and we co-host it. We have beers and pie.

Dave, let Matt have his thing. Just let Matt have his thing. I just want to eat pies. I know, but Matt's doing a really good job on the beer pie ania. You put yourself up to everyone else. You're a fantastic host on that show. Very funny. Look at him backpedaling, Matt.

Look at him. Unbelievable. Minutes ago he was like, you know, it needs more Dave. You know what it needs? It just needs, oh, it needs a little, oh, you know, I could more Dave You know what it needs it just needs oh, it needs a little I could come and do it Shut the fuck up to get your own TV show. I don't mind it a day. We should do a pie special. Oh great Yeah, I can stand up for you. That's right. And if you don't agree with that, then I'll tell you what Thank you tomorrow the final one comes from Braden Burke

Thank you, Tamara. The final one comes from Brayden Burke, AKA guy who fires the golden gun to start a race when the guy who is supposed to shoot the gun is late. That rings a bell, but I can't remember what that's referring to. Maybe we'll find out in this. I mean, it'd be great if you never explained that it's just turning up. Hey, I've got my own gun. Great. Oh, perfect.

I think I think it might have been from one of my reports, the the New York to Paris car race, which I think one of you wasn't there for. So you wouldn't one of you has got an excuse for not remembering that. I think it might have been me, but I also I'm never going to remember anything anyway. I might have missed one each. Did you do a part two? And then maybe I missed the second one. Yes. Yes.

So we're off the hook. One of us is. We're both off the hook. I assume it's me. So Braden's offering a brag slash fact slash suggestion slash deal question. Writing I'm a PhD student at the University of Connecticut studying maritime archaeology. Whoa, that sounds fun. I've been listening for years and subscribed for three, three reasons.

One to tell you all that you have had such an influence on me and my studies. And I can't thank you enough for that. Two to give you all some money and three, to make you an offer. Oh, my gosh. This could be interesting. Um, first, I should say, when I started listening to your podcast, I live very close to an island called Charles, Charles Island in Long Island Sound. I was kayaking near the island while listening to your episode on Captain Kidd.

It's so funny that we've sort of, in a way, been kayaking. You know what I mean? We were there, at least in voice. Do you think I'd get seasick in a kayak? Yes. I don't know. But it feels like if you get seasick snorkeling, it feels like you'd get seasick in a bath. Yeah, I get seasick just from wearing a life jacket.

Yeah. So he says, funnily enough, there have been legends for 300 years that Kid was buried, Kid buried some of his treasure on Charles Island. This was right around the time I was deciding if I should focus on maritime archaeology or other areas of interest. And this experience helped solidify my choice. Isn't that amazing? Now on to the important stuff. Oh yeah, the important stuff, not where you're dedicating your life's attention to. Now to the important stuff. In the 1908 Peking to Paris motor race episode, Matt briefly mentioned that one of the organizers

had previously set up a disastrous motorboat race in the Mediterranean in 1905 where almost every ship sank. That brief comment sent me on a deep dive. Man, I really forgot about that, but I should really do an episode on it. That race is known as the 1905 Algiers to Toulon motorboat race and is actually quite a story. This is one, this is a longer one and I'm losing my spot, sorry. There is very little written about the event. Okay, maybe that's why I haven't done it. Oh no, I should finish the sentence before making comment. There's very little written about the event that doesn't come from French newspapers at

the time. I'm the podcast version of Rube, aren't I? Very easily distracted. However, a website called Hard Replanned History and a book called Power Boat, Quest for Speed by Kevin Desmond, both discuss it in slightly more detail. I've translated some French documents that have provided more context as well, adding to the story, Camille de Gaste was a participant in the race, one of only three women motor racers in the early 20th century. So here's the offer, I want

you guys to do an episode covering Camille de Gaste and the 9.05 Algiers d'Ot on motorboat race. She is the sound character of the event and it is honestly quite thrilling. Discussing her life and or the origin of motorboating would add excellent context. In exchange, I will email you copies of the parts of the book mentioned above with the story,

send you links to any websites with information and translated newspaper pages. I'll also send you the origin any websites with information and translated newspaper pages. I'll also send you the origin of motorboat racing, of which this is one of the earliest races and certainly one of the most infamous and exciting. Yeah, you, I'm in. Send me, send me this. Don't send to the others because I'll keep, I obviously don't want them to see it. And I'll, I'll definitely do an episode on this.

Have you been thinking of motorboat racing and giggling every time? Every time. We will have to dedicate 10 minutes at the top of the episode, probably five in the middle and then 10 at the end for motorboat related gags. Who can motorboat the fastest? That's what I'm imagining with motorboat racing. Early 20th century motorboaters. Good stuff. Finishes by saying not only do I think we all deserve another epic early

20th century race story from you guys. I really, I guess I did also did the, um, the Dole Air Race. I was, I was right into these sort of big and disastrous ish, uh, races back then. Yeah. Keener do more of those. I'd forgotten about that as a genre. Um, says, um, generally, I genuinely intend to search for the sunken boats at Keena do more of those. I'd forgotten about that as a genre. Says, I genuinely intend to search for the sunken boats

at some point after finishing my PhD. Hunting for them would be too expensive to do as my PhD dissertation, but perhaps with the help of Dougal and the story can get more attention and maybe, just maybe, I can get someone to fund my research. Anyway, love you guys.

Keep doing this forever, please. Like actually till you die or till I die. Well, all good things must come to an end, I suppose. One or the other. We're around the same age, except for Matt. He's old. But man, is he hot. Oh, big finish. I appreciate that. My God. Wow. By also says, please come to New Haven, Connecticut.

He'll buy an entire row of seats. I don't know if New Haven, Connecticut, Dave, was on any of the American plans, but previously, but if we've sold one row, that's pretty good. Pretty good. We should book a venue that's just really wide. So it's like three rows and they've all got two hundred. We've got in writing. You said a whole row. Well you said it.

So. And Jess. He's an invoice champ. If you don't buy that full row, what would you be? A tight ass probably, yeah. Thank you so much to Braden, Tamara, Paul and Pete. Next thing we do is shout out to a few of our other great supporters. Jess only comes up with a game based on the topic.

You'll never believe it. I've found a baseball team name generator. No way. But firstly, I need to ask you two things because you have to choose a category from each column and then it's gonna do names from there. So the first one is agitated adjectives, fancy adjectives, goofy adjectives adjectives or non pro city name

So do you want to start with a city name or a goofy adjective? Those are my favorites. Yeah Wait, what do you I reckon go with your heart? Maybe be good to have a name like a city name. Yes, and then our other option is 80s, 90s players last names. Sounds dirty, but isn't. Oh, it's hard to go past. I know I've already selected that one, but I'll see if you guys change your mind.

Yeah, no, that sounds good. All right, great. Okay, submit. And we could use the cities of what their cities there are already from. True. And then you can also use one of those other ones. Nah, it's come up with some good stuff.

So, OK, great. Dave, I'll how about I do the place you do the name just as the team. Love it. All right. First up, I'd love to thank, oh my gosh, from address unknown, can only assume that they're from deep within the fortress of the moles. It's Rahul Cleven or Rahul Cleven. Holy shit, that's a good name. Pitcher for the Fort Wayne Beaver Traps.

My God. Yes. I also have to select the one from each category every time so we can mix it up. OK. OK. But it did start strong with Fort Wayne Beaver Traps. I think you should just go with your heart each time. Let the name guide you. Yeah.

I'd also love to thank from Nashville, Tennessee. It's Rebecca. And this is a few options here, Rebecca. Rebecca Guilin. Rebecca Guilin. Rebecca Jewelin. Oh, do a really soft G one like, Eeglein.

Rebecca Ichlein. Yeah, I think that could be it. And Rebecca's from Nashville, right? From Nashville. It's the Nashville Pickled Adams Apples. Oh, I hate it. That one was goofy adjectives and non-sexual anatomy and medical conditions.

Yeah. Wow. I don't think I like that one. No, he doesn't have a jar of them. Pickled Adam's apples. Oh, wow. That's truly horrific. Sorry. Next up, I'd love to thank from Grafton in New South Wales, Australia.

Thank you, Matthew Whittingham. Matthew Whittingham plays for the this. I don't know that one, never mind. The. The Grafton Dictaphone. Oh, yeah, that's good. I met Matthew at he came to a few shows I did in Brisbane recently. We had a drink after and he's like a he plays like the leading roles in musicals.

Oh, cool. So maybe he's using the Dictaphone to for ideas. Oh, oh, really big song to finish stuff like that. Idea, idea for the musical. Oh, finish with a bang. Yeah, OK. That's good stuff. Next up, I'd love to thank from Kelvin Grove in Queensland, Australia. It's Grace. Who plays for the Boynton Beach trombones.

Boynton is so good. I love Boynton Beach. Boynton Beach Trombones. Boynton is so good. I love Boynton Beach. Boynton Beach and Boynton and Trombone. It feels like a trombone. It kind of Boynton. Boynton. Boynton. Boynton. Boynton. Boynton.

Boynton. Grace, thank you so much. Next up from Olympia in Washington in the United States. Thank you to Lisa Jackson. Lisa Jackson plays for the Roanoke drill bits. Oh, that's really good. Roanoke's a previous topic, wasn't it? That's true.

Uh, mascot, drilly. Yeah, it's the little drilly. Very cute. Big eyes. Very cute. Catchphrase. Zzoo zzoo. I'd love to thank from Conroe in Texas in the United States. It's Chris Taylor.

Who plays for the belligerent Palookas. What is a Palooka? Who knows? I really like it. I love it. And it's Mascot's catchphrase is, ZOO ZOO! Thank you, Chris. From Berserker in Queensland, Australia. Wow, Berserker.

I've never heard of that. I love it. Emma McPherson. Who plays for the Berserker Barnacles. Oh yeah. That's really good. The BBs. And Matt, what's the mascot's, mascot's slogan?

Ah, I'm in pain. So does Barry the Barnacle. He's in a lot of pain. He's just trying to get a bit of work combo going. Next up from, oh, I just, I know, can only assume from deep within the fortress of the moles. It's Neve O'Connell. Fantastic name.

And a player from the Pensacola Axe Wielders. And their mascots catch phrases, you're in pain. I'm going to kill you. You're dead. You're dead. Thank you. Last week, they played they played Barry the Barnacle and beat him up. That's why it's in such pain. Normally, he's actually quite chipper. And no one's helping him.

He does need medical attention. Yeah, he does need help. They all think, ah, it's part of your shtick, but no. And finally, this week, I'd love to thank from Leeds, Leeds, Leeds in Great Britain. Johnny Gukian. I'm giving a few options this week. Johnny Gukian. Who plays for the Leeds Cockles.

Oh, yeah. Leeds, Leeds, Leeds, yeah. Leeds cockle cockle cockle cockle. Oh wow. Cockle cockle to Johnny, Neve, Emma, Chris, Lisa, Grace, Matthew, Rebecca and Raoul. And finally, we've just got, before we head off to Induct 3, a triptych of fantastic supporters into our triptych club, which Dave will explain so well. Oh my goodness. This is our theatre of the mind slash Hall of Fame, where people have been on the shout out level or above for three consecutive years. We welcome them in with a big ceremony every week and they join the people who are already in the club because you can't leave.

But why would you want to? Because inside there's entertainment, there's food, there's distractions from all the chaos of life, because this is just a fun hangout zone. Yeah. And you can see Jess in there and the food court, you know, being quite dramatic. Yeah. And you can say, wow, I'm going to cast her in my next feature film. Yeah. And I'll say, you wish you could afford me because I'm playing hardball. Yeah. You can't. Yeah. People just come by all day long and go, geez, you've got a certain X factor. And I say, yeah, no shit.

Come to me when you got a big novelty size check and then we'll fucking talk. But if you just hit a compliment, me keep walking, you fuggly loser. And you're saying to those people in the triptych club. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm saying with my eyes. Yes triptych club. No, no, no, no, no, no. I'm saying it with my eyes. Yes, in character. But then you wink. In character. And then I say, and scene.

Can I get you anything from the bar, I say? You know, I'm very nice. Cause there is a bar and you're behind it. Don't you normally have like a special drink, a cocktail on theme? What's the Rube Waddell cocktail? Beer. Oh yeah.

And food wise, let me tell you, let me ask you a question. Let me just say, hot dogs, get your hot dogs. Really? Yeah, I'm walking around, I've got hot dogs. How? And I need you to take them off me

because they are incredibly hot. Wow, and that is a question. They're actually hot dogs. They're burning. Let and that is a question. They're actually hot dogs. They're burning. Let me ask you a question. Hot dogs, get your hot dogs. How about you shut up? How about that?

How about you shut up, you fugly loser? I've had enough of you. Can we turn the screen off? I can't look at him anymore. He's repulsive. And I've got the pretty filter on it's not helping yeah, I gotta turn it up to maximum how about now Beautiful Dave you do you normally book a band am I remembering this right for the answer always book a band and Am I remembering this right for the after party? Yes, I always book a band and I book these months, weeks, sometimes years in advance.

These are big international acts that tour all over the world. And this week, you're never going to believe who I've booked. It's the Rubens. Whoa! What are the chances? Hoops and everything. Get back, never get back too soon. That's right. Their number one Triple J Hottest 100 song.

Wow. I'll be playing it over and over and over again. I welcome it. But then again. And then a great hit set. Hoops. But they changed that because I assume Hoops is about basketball. They change it to they do a baseball version of it.

It's about earrings, you idiot. What? All right. So I'm on the door. It's about earrings you idiot I've had enough of you. Shut up! I mean, I hear the message. It's just somehow not getting through. I'm so sorry. Oh, I'm so sorry. All right. So I'm so sorry Jess. I do have to just talk a little bit longer.

So I'm on the door. Makes me sick. This is the theatre of the mind. I got the clipboard, I got three names on it. If you hear your name, come on in. Dave's up on stage. He's going to hype you up with some weak word play. He's emceeing the night.

Obviously hang around to see the Rubens afterwards. Jess is also hyping up Dave. If you haven't listened to this section of the show before, Dave's, you know, he's not the mostens afterwards. Jess is also hyping up Dave, if you don't if you haven't listened in this section of the show before Dave's, you know, he's not the most confident man. That's ironic. He is the most confident. So Jess has to hype him up a little bit. And yes. So, Dave, you're ready to go? Let's rock. All right. First, that's it. That's an unconfident man.

Let's welcome in from Belgala in New South Wales, Australia. It's Courtney Recently the person who's taught me the most about myself. It's Courtney Introspection from Courtney Thank you Zoo Zoo Zoo! Oh, Drilly's here Um Next up, thank you so much Corny Next up from, oh address unknown, can only assume from deep within the fortress of the moles, it's

Josh Hillman. There's only one hill that this man will die on, and that's defending Josh Hillman! I wanna die on you Josh! I'm in pain, I'm in pain, oh my god Barnacle Bill bills here too. And finally-

We're actually doing fine by ourselves, that's the thing. We're actually doing okay, and you're ruining the flow. And finally from Palatine in Illinois in the United States, it's Emily Austria. My favorite Austrian. They're not even from Austria, it's Emily Austria! Who's your least favorite Austrian? Oh gosh, there's so many bad ones. It's Emily Austrian! Who's your least favorite Austrian? Gosh, there's so many bad ones. Well, I think there's one pretty famous bad one I'll go with. There's some really bad ones though.

They know what they did. You're not gonna put one out in front? Okay. Yeah, I'll leave it at that. Um, thanks so much to Josh and Courtney. Welcome to the Tripp Ditch Club. Make yourselves at home, hang around for the Rubens afterwards and let's party all night long and also get your hot dogs. Jess, is there anything we need to tell people before you finish up? I just want you to shut the fuck up. He keeps talking to me. He just keeps talking. I don't understand. keeps talking to me. He just keeps talking.

I don't understand. I'm so sorry. I don't know how to throw to you without words on an audio medium. I'm sorry. Shush, just shush. All I want to say is that if people want to suggest a topic they can, there's a link in the show notes. It's also on our website, which is dogoonpod.com.

And please find us on social media, dogoonpod, across Instagram, Facebook. You can find us at dogoonpodcast on TikTok. You can see probably that clip of me yelling at Matt, realistically is gonna be on there. And also to note that we love you. That's all I have to say. Now, Dave, boot this baby home. Can I be so forward to say

that the Melbourne International Comedy Festival kicks off next week Matt and I are both doing our shows We'd love to see there and we're all doing one night only do go on the quiz show live at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival Festival Club Wednesday April 2nd at 11 p.m. And man are we planning on having a good time? Oh man, so pumped So I'd love to see you there if you're in and around Melbourne. But apart from that, thank you so much for listening. And until next week, it's goodbye. Later.

Bye. Don't forget to sign up to our tour mailing list so we know where in the world you are and we can come and tell you when we're coming there. Wherever we go, we always hear six months later, oh you should come to Manchester. We were just in Manchester. We were just there, but this way you'll never miss out. And don't forget to sign up, go to our Instagram, click our link tree, very, very easy. It means we know to come to you and you also know that we're coming to you. Yeah, you will come to you up, go to our Instagram, click our link tree, very, very easy. It means we know to come to you, and you also know that we're coming to you.

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