Two In The Think Tank - 497 - The Clinton - Lewinsky Scandal
Episode Date: April 30, 2025It's a scandal you have definitely heard of, but do you know exactly what happened in the Clinton - Lewinsky scandal? This is a comedy/history podcast, the report begins at approximately 07.37 (though... as always, we go off on tangents throughout the report).For all our important links: https://linktr.ee/dogoonpod Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/Who Knew It with Matt Stewart: https://play.acast.com/s/who-knew-it-with-matt-stewart/Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader ThomasDo Go On acknowledges the traditional owners of the land we record on, the Wurundjeri people, in the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders, past and present. REFERENCES AND FURTHER READING:https://time.com/5120561/bill-clinton-monica-lewinsky-timeline/https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bill_Clintonhttps://web.archive.org/web/20191207172320/https://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/politics/special/clinton/stories/clinton012198.htmhttps://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/politics/special/clinton/stories/tripp091298.htmhttps://abcnews.go.com/US/president-girlfriend-linda-tripps-betrayal-monica-lewinsky-taped/story?id=59865969https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monica_Lewinskyhttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clinton%E2%80%93Lewinsky_scandal Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Hey mates, it's Matt here in the year 2025. Just to let you know that I'm going to be in Perth this weekend, the 2nd and 3rd of May 2025, doing my show Bad Boy at the Perth Comedy Festival.
And also our little mate Dave Warnocky is coming to Sydney with his show Dave Warnocky Dates the Entire Audience. That's him and Sammy P.
And well, actually I'm in Perth with Sammy P. There's a real Sammy P link there.
So if you want to see us and Sammy P, I'm in Perth, Dave's in Sydney.
And there's a bunch of other things that we'll announce soon.
So sign up to the mailing list and yeah, stay up to date.
Cheers. Hello and welcome to another episode of Do Go On.
My name is Dave Warnocky and as always, I'm here with Matt Stewart and Jess Perkins.
Hello!
Hey, how's it going?
So good to be here and quick question for you too.
How good is it to be alive?
Well, I'll feel this one real good.
OK. So this is the first episode where it's just been the three of us for like a month,
I think. Is that right?
In the room together.
Yes. Just the three of us in the room together.
Wearing these outfits. Wearing these outfits on this day.
Yeah, no, he's right. He is right.
I've just checked the calendar.
He is correct about that.
So I forgot the last week, we, it was just the three of us.
It was, but I was interstate.
I was via satellite.
Yes, that's right.
And it was so, it was so good to see you there up on the big screen.
Oh, yeah, I was up on the big screen.
You guys are on my small laptop, but I was still good to see you.
Was it good to see us on the little screen?
Yeah. Do we look better on the little screen? Yeah.
Do we look better on a little screen?
Definitely.
Yeah. More compact.
You get all the goodness, but really squeezed into a small thing.
Yeah.
It's like, you know, sipping on concentrated cordial.
Yeah.
No watering down.
So good.
Is that what you mean?
Yeah. No watering down necessary.
Jess.
Yep.
How good is it to be alive? It's fine.
Yeah, great.
And Dave, how does this show work?
What we do here is we take it in terms to report on a topic often suggested to us by
one of the listeners.
We go away, we research that topic, bathe in the knowledge and bring it back in the
form of a report to the others who have no idea what the topic is going to be.
Matt and I are completely in the dark here.
Jess has picked a topic, done the research and we always start with a question to get us on
the topic. JP, what's your question?
My question is, who did not have sexual relations with that woman?
Bill Clinton.
Jim Carrey.
What the heck? You don't want a Bill Clinton episode?
Not, yes, in a way.
Is this the history of the saxophone?
It's the history of the saxophone.
That's right. I was going to say, hang on.
Oh yeah, we did that.
Well, I mean, it is about Bill Clinton, but specifically, I mean, what was that question
in relation to?
Oh, it was in the Monarch Lewinsky affair.
Yeah, this is the Clinton Lewinsky scandal.
Oh my gosh, the second most scandalous thing that man's ever done after, of course, hair
gate.
Oh yes.
I told you, he kind of got that, might have got a haircut on the runway and closed down
a runway.
And then it turned out that wasn't true.
Honestly, I mean, like all presidents or politicians of note, there's a lot of scandals around
this guy.
This is one of them.
Really?
It's really interesting that Dave puts this in the top two with the hair gate thing because
Dave believes in the QAnon stuff.
So like, if that doesn't even make the top two for him then.
Yeah, well there's a three, four and five, but the number one, hair gate.
Paying $200 to that guy, come out, give him a haircut.
And then what?
It turned out to be not true. It just wasn't true.
Okay.
But I think he did get the haircut. One thing, you can say a lot about Bill,
but he had fantastic hair.
Great hair.
At all times.
Yeah, and may he rest in peace. You're talking about his hair like it's dead.
He's still got good hair.
Yeah, his hair's still good.
At the time of recording.
We're doing back to back POTUS episodes.
Yeah, you're right. Wow.
This is one of those things that I'm, just spelling that out in your mind. I couldn't remember last week.
I was like, really?
No, I wasn't spelling out POTUS.
I was like, what the fuck did we do?
Abraham Lincoln.
I'm with it.
There's one of the things I'm very aware of the, maybe with the two or three
sentence summary of this scandal.
Exactly.
But I really don't of this scandal. Exactly.
But I really don't know a lot.
Exactly.
But it's also so funny to think of it as a scandal, imagining it happening now, I'd be
like, what?
Exactly.
That's page 15 for one day.
Yeah.
And then it's quickly forgotten because something way crazier, way more scandalous is happening.
Exactly. So it's kind of crazy. But yeah, I wanted to do this topic because you're right,
that I know the one or two sentence summary of it.
He didn't have sexual relations with that woman.
Okay. Spoilers.
Oh no, I've managed to pad this out for 4,000 words.
Okay.
Well done.
I think I might be mixing the Julia Gillard speech with the Bill Clinton speech. I've managed to pad this out for 4000 words, okay? Well done.
I think I might be mixing the Julia Gillard speech with the Bill Clinton speech.
I will not be lectured on sexual relations by that man.
Which actually could have, that would have been relevant too because yeah, I don't want
Tony Abbott teaching sex ed, you know?
Winking and eating an onion.
He was very similar to my sex ed teacher, Mr. Sharpton.
Mr. Sharpton, whose catchphrase was of course.
If you're up, you're in.
And also there are inny holes and there are outy holes.
Yeah.
We love you, Mr. Sharpton.
But yeah, so I think having grown up in the 90s,
we're aware of, you know, the story. but I didn't really know all that much about it.
So I've gone into it in a little bit more detail. That's great. Thank you. Has been suggested by a few people.
It's been suggested by Sandy Tai from Ballarat,
Ariane from Ireland and David Malofsky from London. Ah, a place to wear his cape.
Or hang your cape. Oh, I was thinking a place to wear your cape is around your neck.
But, you know. Or hang your cape. Oh, I was thinking the place to wear your cape is around your neck.
But you know.
He's got a website. You were just called that.
Explaining a place you could wear a cape.
Yes. In case he was wondering.
It wasn't relevant, Dave. No.
Matt was just telling you a place you could wear a cape.
Yeah. Around your neck.
That's one of the places around your waist.
If you want. If you want it.
It'll drag on the ground.
Let me get a pen. Jesus. You've gone too far.
You've got a computer in front of me.
You're like, I need a pen and paper immediately.
All right.
Just quickly, just to give everyone an update.
Within 100 of 10,000 on Instagram followers.
So make sure you go unfollow Matt.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Follow Dave Warnocky.
No, no. Yeah. Now the good, no. Follow Dave Warnocky.
The good people haven't been listening to you,
they've been listening to me.
What a bunch of cowards.
And dare I say, misogynists.
What, you won't listen to a woman?
Well, no, they're following a feminist.
And if they follow me, I'll take them to equality.
By posting shirtless pics of yourself having a tea in the sun.
You do follow me. A lot of skin on your page. Mm-hmm by posting shirtless pics of yourself having a tea in the sun
Yeah, let us do follow
a skin on your page skin
There's not like a lot of scary and I get what you see
I'm saying I'm saying bits of collarbone. Oh, I'm like is this only fans or it's the credit Oh my gosh, I'll be charging for this contest? Yes! Most recent photo, you doing a marathon?
Wow.
What a guy.
Legs out.
Legs out.
The thing I've found out, people want to see photos from the past more than photos from
today.
Oh.
It's a real sad indictment on my life.
Yeah.
Any new stuff, they're like, eww.
Well, most of the new stuff admittedly is me going, please come to my show.
So I give them something for the algorithm.
I throw some stuff back.
That's nice.
Facebook memories has really been helping out
my content creation.
And that's what I think of myself as a content creator.
Yeah.
I think so.
Once you hit that 10K.
Yeah.
You better believe on my passport or whatever,
it's going to say content creator.
Yeah, influencer.
Is there a spot on there for that?
On your passport?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's right in a pen.
So this is not valid.
You've written content creator over your name.
Well, that's my new name.
Call me Con.
Okay.
So a little bit of background.
Firstly, like I said, there's obviously so much in a, in a political career, in a presidential career.
I mean, you just like look at the Wikipedia page and there's like four million subheadings
of different things.
There's a lot to cover in a presidency.
But don't worry, I've already covered the hair.
So there's not much left.
And the saxophone.
So I've lost 2000 of the 4000 words.
So we're good.
You forgot.
The rest is on the stain, right?
It's all on the stain.
And the cigar.
Yeah.
Have these things come up?
I actually did not include the cigar.
Okay.
Because I read it and went, ugh.
But the stain is in there.
I think I'm unaware of the cigar.
You're going to have to put it in now.
Okay.
Well, that's what he did.
Yeah.
We'll tell you later when it's relevant.
Oh my God.
Or now is also an option.
Yeah, so that's why I left it out, but there's more.
But anyway, a little background on Clinton.
Dave is... Is this true? Shaken up. Yeah, he's pretty why I left it out, but there's more. But anyway, a little background on Clinton. Dave is shaking up.
Yeah, he's pretty gross to be honest.
But don't worry. Don't worry Dave. He's a middle-aged white man, so he's suffered no consequences.
Yeah, I will say he's the most powerful man in the world at the time.
So don't worry about it. He's fine. So William Jefferson Blythe III.
Oh my god.
Sorry, what?
A man of the people.
You can tell already.
William Jefferson Blythe III.
I didn't hear a single Clinton in that name.
Correct.
He was born August 19, 1946 in Hope, Arkansas.
His very early life sounds rather tragic.
His father was William Jefferson Blythe Jr., a traveling salesman who died in an automobile
accident three months before his birth.
Oh my God.
His mother, Virginia Dell Cassidy, was William Sr.'s fifth wife, although it turned out he
hadn't actually divorced wife number four.
I mean, there'd be so much paperwork in that guy's life.
Five divorces.
But.
It's possible he really had no idea.
He's like, I did it?
I've signed so many of those divorce papers.
Yeah, but you'd think he'd get good at it because you know what you're doing.
Oh, true. He'd probably just have a stamp.
It'd be really quick and easy now. Just calls the same lawyer and says, I'm going to need
another one. So he-
Don't worry, I got it already. He would also be like, that's the same time.
As soon as you're married, I'm filing up. I'm drafting your divorce papers.
News, TV news stations always have the death packages ready to go.
Yeah, yeah.
He's like, can you sign here for the marriage and just presign here for the divorce and
I'll just fill in my initials that I need to?
Yeah, I'll file that when it's relevant.
You just give me a call.
So his mother, Virginia, she traveled to New Orleans to study nursing soon after Bill was
born, leaving him in hope with her parents, Eldridge and Edith Cassidy, who owned and
ran a small grocery store.
She returned four years later in 1950 and married Roger Clinton, senior, who co-owned
an automobile dealership in Hot Springs, Arkansas.
Man, hope and Hot Springs.
Arkansas is is two for two for names.
They're the only two city names I've heard of, but they're both bangers.
That's good.
So Virginia and baby Bill or toddler Billler Bill by this time, they moved to
Hot Springs. While at school in Hot Springs, Clinton was an active student leader, avid
reader and musician. He was in the chorus and played the tenor saxophone, winning first
chair in the state band saxophone section.
Wow, he's actually very good then.
Right.
Yeah. He briefly considered dedicating his life to music.
But as he noted in his autobiography, My Life, sometime in my 16th year-
It's such a boring title.
It's such a boring title.
Sometime in my 16th year, I decided I wanted to be in public life as an elected official.
I loved music and thought I could be very good, but I knew I'd never be John Coltrane or
Stan Getz.
I was interested in medicine and thought I could be a fine doctor, but I knew I'd never be John Coltrane or Stan Getz. I was interested in medicine and thought I could be a fine doctor,
but I knew I would never be Michael DeBakey,
but I knew I could be great in public service."
So he's sort of like,
I can be really good at those things,
but I won't be the best.
But it's so funny, he's like,
but I could be, you know, Abraham Lincoln
or George Washington.
Easy peasy.
Easy.
Yeah.
They've all got, like, you could say any field
and go, I'm not gonna be a legend of the past.
Yeah.
But he did from politics is like, but yeah, no legends in this field.
But also like, but also like you go, okay, well, um, I could be a really good doctor,
but there's a better doctor.
Okay.
We still need more doctors.
Do you know what I mean?
Like that one doctor, he can't do it all.
It would probably be helpful if you also became a pretty good doctor.
Yes.
Yeah.
It's weird.
He's like, I mean, maybe that's why it's best he didn't go into it.
It sounds like ego is a big part of it for him.
Which I don't know if that's common in politicians.
No, I think that's unique.
That's really interesting actually.
We've like so early, we've really like gotten down to the core of it with him and only him.
That's how well, yeah. Maybe that's just how you make it to the top.
Maybe VPs, little ego and the thing to get you all the way up to the top.
To the top P.
VPs, they don't have their eye on the top prize. They don't care about that.
No, they're there for the people.
Yes. Well, I could, yeah. Biden, he was happy to stay at VP.
Yeah, that's right. He loved being VP.
George H.W. Washington, if that's right.
George H.W. Washington, yes.
Lyndon B. Johnson. Yeah, yeah.
Yeah. He could be president.
Yeah, he was. But he didn't want to.
His ego wasn't like that. No, that's right.
He's like VP for me.
Lyndon B. Lyndon B.
Leave me be at VP. Lyndon B. Lyndon B. Leave me be at VP.
Lyndon B.
That's it, to the music of Let it Be.
And that sounded like.
If I could remember any of the words, I'd just say,
Lyndon, leave me be at VP.
Lyndon B.
Johnson. That was beautiful backgroundon B. Johnston.
That's beautiful background vocals there.
Yeah.
I do both foreground and background.
I got the ego.
I do foreground and background.
Yeah, I do some foreground vocals.
I do foreground vocals.
Oh, maybe I'll have a little break.
I'll write my own bits.
So after graduating from high school, he attended Georgetown University in Washington,
DC, receiving a bachelor of science in foreign service in 1968.
Don't ask me what foreign services, I don't know.
But he could be the best ever foreign service I've ever heard of.
Easily.
No, but Doug Johnson, unfortunately.
He's like, how am I ever going to do what Doug did?
I mean, I might sound like an idiot.
The doctor named before I'd never heard of them.
Just love the idea that he's just naming his GP.
He'll never be as good as Michael.
Michael is such a good doctor.
Dr. Michael, he's always, if he's late, it's only by five minutes.
And that's very impressive at a GP.
Upon graduating from Georgetown in 68, he won a Rhodes scholarship to Oxford,
where he studied philosophy, politics and economics.
He was offered a place to study
at Yale Law School. So he left early to return to the United States and did not receive a degree
from Oxford. Rod Scholar, more in common with Tony Abbott. That's right. Wow.
He earned his law degree from Yale in 1973 and Yale was also where he met a young woman named Hillary Rodham. Ooh. Oh my gosh. The two met not- Rodham by name.
I'm just imagining how the first date ended.
Rodham.
I've also never heard her pronounce Rodham.
Is it Rodham or is it Rodham?
I think it's Rodham,
but I think Rodham is so good.
Rodham by name.
I did mean to look that up
because I think I've heard it both.
Okay, maybe I'm, I mean, I'm, I'm seeing. No. Hey Jess, if I could jump in here I think I've heard it both. Okay, maybe I'm in.
No.
Hey Jess, if I could jump in here.
I haven't heard it either.
I don't think I knew her.
Because she goes by both, I think.
Oh, right.
She still goes by Hilary Rodham.
No, she hyphenates sometimes.
She's Ronald Clinton, yeah.
I like it.
How do I find this to know? When she's ordering a pizza, Dave, what name does she put down when she's like, Clinton, yeah. I like it. How do I find this to know?
When she's ordering a pizza, Dave, what name does she put down when she's ordering a pizza?
An extra special with a lot and she's winking.
What does she say then?
Have you seen when Goxie...
Hang on.
Radham.
Radham.
Radham.
How did I say it? Rodham. I like Rod Radham. Radham. Radham.
How did I say it?
Rodham.
I like rodham better.
Me too.
It's funny.
Oh, you know what?
Rodham.
That's like more British, I think.
Rodham.
Rodham.
Rodham.
Dennis Rodham.
Radham.
Radham.
Radham.
Radham.
So they met in 71.
They were soon inseparable.
Sorry, I did interrupt to think about Goxie there if you want to go on that journey.
When he orders a pizza at Domino's, he asks people, what should I put the name under?
And people say stuff like fart and it says, like it's on a digital screen, like fart is
in the oven or whatever.
If you don't follow Goxie-
You got it.
On Facebook especially, I think that's where he's most active.
That's right.
He's, apart from the greatest corner of the internet,
nice corner of the internet, the Patreon group that we have,
the only other shining line on Facebook is Goxie's page.
Yes.
I'm a big fan.
Yep.
All right.
Hilary Rodham.
Rodham.
And if you thought that was ridiculous earlier,
that's just my accent and fuck you.
No one thought that.
They did.
Everyone thought it was the best.
They were writing a tweet. They were writing a tweet.
They were writing a tweet.
If anyone's getting upset about mispronouncing Hillary Clinton's birth name, then I think
they're on track in life and they're nailing it.
And I think they should make no adjustments whatsoever.
Correct. They were married in 1975 and they had their only child Chelsea in 1980.
Now, like all presidents, there's extensive info about every large and small thing that happened
across his career. But I'm trying to do a light background here.
This is not a report on Bill Clinton, but I'm just I'm skipping over some stuff.
He was in Arkansas, like right up until Washington?
Basically, yeah.
I'm skipping over a lot, but I'm giving you an idea of how he ended up in the White House.
So after graduating from Yale Law School, he returned to Arkansas and became a law professor
at the University of Arkansas.
And in 74, he ran for the House of Representatives from Wikipedia, which is like a Bill Clinton
website.
You did say there's lots of articles.
Well, Bill, what's Bill short for?
Wiki.
Yeah.
Wiki.
Wikium.
Wikium.
Wikium.
Beautiful.
You don't hear enough Wikiums now.
No.
Running in the conservative third district against incumbent Republican John Paul Hammershmit,
Clinton's campaign was bolstered by the anti-Republican and anti-incumbent mood resulting from the Watergate scandal. Hammer Schmidt, who had received 77% of the vote
in 1972, defeated Clinton by only a 52% to 48% margin. So he like, you know.
Really? I mean, he did a good, yeah.
I'm voting Hammer Schmidt. I don't know any, I don't know his policies, but what a name.
Hammer Schmidt. Hammer Schmidt. Hammer Schmidt.
And is Bill only like 28 years old? Am I doing the maths there right?
Is this seven? Yeah, probably. Yep. Pretty young, isn't he?
Yeah. So you're getting House of Reps. Yeah, they're weird.
I think, I think at least like the big mainstream parties, young people getting involved with
that for some reason, and it shouldn't be, I think it's great people get involved in politics, but I think the people who are young and get
involved in the big parties are often a bit weak.
Yeah.
And this was, this was 74.
Yeah, yeah.
So in 76, he ran for Arkansas attorney general, defeating the secretary of state and the deputy
attorney general in the Democratic party.
Clinton was elected with no opposition in the general election as no Republican had
run for office.
So he won by default, I guess.
He is attorney general.
Two years later, he was elected governor of Arkansas.
He was only 32 years old when he took office, the youngest governor in the country at the
time and the second youngest governor in the history of Arkansas.
32.
That's, that's crazy.
I love winning by default is great.
I love that.
Yeah.
That's my favorite way to win.
To put it in a golfing terms for Dave.
Hey, yes.
They don't draw pictures on scorecards.
I said that to you once and you loved it.
That's like a- I don't get it.
Like you do, if you hit it like a shit shot, like it, but it runs on the ground and you
have luck and you end up getting an okay score.
Hey, that's like an old time guy on the golf course.
Hey, I don't draw pictures on scorecards, mate.
Because if they did, it'd be really fucking terrible.
It'd be like, it'd be embarrassed.
It'd be, yeah, it would be, it'd be a pretty hard way to put a score down as well.
Yeah.
And all of a sudden you need to be an artist as well.
I'm not good at golf, let alone scoring.
I hate this game.
It's funny you're talking about politics, Bob, because I, on the way to get coffees before you arrived,
I got flired and I realized that the early polling's open for the federal election here.
And all of a sudden, on the way to the coffee shop, I voted.
I'm like, wait, when is the election?
But it's not for at the time of recording.
It's like a week and a half away.
Yeah.
But yeah, I got it done.
Well done.
Yeah.
And did you vote for Hammershmit?
Yeah.
I just wrote yes, yes, a thousand times yes next to Hammershmit? I, yeah, I just wrote yes, yes, a thousand times yes
next to Hammershmit.
That's nice, that's nice.
I think that counts for three.
I know I had some great chats
with some of the volunteers there.
And yeah, not any of the young people
for the two major parties.
I spoke to the young people who were talking
about some of the minor parties.
Oh, so they're not weird?
Yeah, no, they're not weird.
They're not weird. I don't think they're not weird. They're not weird.
I don't think they're weird, Dave.
I'm sorry.
I just said they're not weird.
I'm sorry.
He said that.
I'm sorry, did I not say the right thing when I said they're not weird?
Sorry, just for the listeners, Dave is VP for Young Liberal Party.
VP?
Jeez.
That's because you have a small ego.
Small ego.
In this fantasy, I can't even be the P.
He loves to be the P.
So Clinton's only 32.
Due to his youthful appearance and literal youth, I guess, he was often called the boy
governor, which I like a lot.
That feels like something we'd call you.
The boy governor.
Did he like that though?
Who knows?
I can't picture him without the silver hair either.
Was he silver at this stage?
I feel like he was a bit of a Steve Martin and that he was silver early.
He did it early.
The best of us are?
I think it's the best way to go, because you just maintain this sort of
silver foxy nature for your whole life.
Young Bill Clinton, I've Googled.
Yeah, it's sort of like dark brown hair.
Bit of salt and pepper. Salt and pepper. Salt and pepper. He held the position for two years
before losing an election, but then was elected again the following year, this time holding the
position for 10 years. Oh wow. There were many controversies during this time as governor.
He's a couple. CIA agent Barry Seal allegedly imported three to five billion dollars worth of cocaine through the airport.
Billion.
And the operation was linked to the Iran-Contra affair.
Clinton was accused of knowing about this operation, although nothing could be proven against him.
His half brother Roger also was a bit of a problem child all through Clinton's political career.
His name should have been Roger, really.
That would have been nominated for determinants, I wonder.
Roger was sentenced to prison in 1985 for possessing and smuggling of cocaine, but was
later pardoned by his brother after serving his sentence.
That's, yeah.
But after serving the sentence though.
Oh yeah, yeah.
Maybe he served a bit, I don't know.
Yeah, thanks a lot brother. I mean, if you'd be like, yeah, thanks a lot, brother.
I needed you about five or six years ago.
But I mean, it's still, what a system where someone can just, yeah, I don't know.
Nah, he's all right.
He's all right.
Whoa.
There were also other scandals such as the Whitewater controversy involving the Clintons
real estate dealings.
And Bill Clinton was accused of serious sexual misconduct in Arkansas, including allegations
of using the Arkansas State Police to gain access to women.
Oh my god.
It was called the Trooper Gate Affair.
Okay, it's funny, like before I was like, this stuff wouldn't even be a big deal then.
But I mean, he got- he swept a lot of stuff onto the rug, obviously, on his way to the-
To the top job.
First chair, they call it, I think.
That's nice.
Wow, that is really awful.
Yep.
So I'll skip over a chunk as well here, but we moved to the 20th of January 1993, when
Bill Clinton was sworn in as the 42nd President of the United States.
Wow.
That's right.
He's a president.
Whoa.
What?
Didn't know that, did you?
42nd as well, hasn't that Dave the Secret to Life?
42.
It is.
Or the universe, whatever.
Mm-hmm.
And so he's only in late 40s.
Yeah.
Wow.
The boy president.
Boy president.
I was like, was he one of the youngest?
But he wasn't the youngest.
There's a rule that you've got to be over 35, right?
So he couldn't the youngest. There's a rule that you got to be over 35, right?
So he couldn't have been much younger.
I thought it was, I thought it was even older than that.
That's crazy. 35 is too young to be president.
35 is too young to-
I might be wrong.
No, I think it's 35, but JFK is pretty young.
Yeah, he was fairly young. And there was like one of the early ones was like 42 or something.
Yeah, when age expectancy was 45.
Exactly. Like that was-
Doesn't count. You were an old man at that point. I think like you talk about old money, you age expectancy was 45. Exactly, like that was- Doesn't count.
You were an old man at that point.
I think like you talk about old money,
you know, you gotta talk about the, in today's age.
Interesting. You know what I mean?
No, I don't.
You know, like inflation.
I think there should be age inflation.
Yes.
You go, oh, it was 10 thruppence back then,
but now that's $17 million.
Exactly, 35 back then was 80.
Yeah, exactly. I think Roosevelt
42 I said one of the old ones. Absolutely right and then JFK
JFK 43 Bill Clinton 46 so the young three. Yep
Still 40 like 40s. It doesn't feel right, but maybe that's maybe that's when it should be
Or do you think I think we might be we I think I think, you know, generally speaking, we might be,
um, swinging the wrong way at the moment to maybe a little too old.
But also do you think there's, cause I'm projecting a bit of my own, uh,
lack of knowledge of anything onto other people.
Do you think there are people that have 34, 35?
And, uh, oh, okay.
There's some, like some of the most impressive people I know are in, you know,
20s and 30s. What do you mean?
Impressive how?
Just like formidable people who I put on.
I'd back to get anything done, you know, like real guns.
I mean, there's one in this room right now.
We're looking around here.
There's only the three of us in this room.
Yeah.
They're obviously pretty awkward persons, they haven't identified themselves.
You know how we said we'd keep an eye out for when his brain starts to go.
You don't think Dave?
I think he's seeing people.
Maddie, I'm talking.
I think he's seeing people.
Yes. I think it's time people. Maddie, I'm talking. I think he's seeing people. Yes.
I think it's time to up his meds.
We'll check to the nurses.
Yeah, I like where this is going.
Yeah, I'm seeing heaps of people.
Oh, there's another one.
So he's Clinton. His public image was overall quite positive.
Authors Martin Walker and Bob Woodward stated that Clinton's innovative use of
sound bite ready dialogue, personal charisma, and public perception oriented
campaigning were a major factor in his high public approval ratings.
Don't you love that none of that is about being good at being the president?
He was charming.
He's good at politics, not good at making America better.
Yeah. Or great again.
Yeah. Like others have proven better,
not naming names, but 50% of our audience are big fans.
Yeah. It's weird how somebody gets to the top job
and then they're not, they don't actually do the job.
They just try and make themselves look
like they'd be good at it.
Yes.
It's really weird.
It sucks.
It sucks.
It's so annoying.
Yeah.
And that is like, the job is just keeping the job.
Yeah.
I mean, I'm more-
And so like not rocking the boat too much.
It's like, no, you probably need to rock the boat to like change, to fix some stuff.
Yeah.
Don't you want, why did you get into this?
Yeah.
But not-
To hold a job?
Not long before, Bill, they had a literal actor be the president.
I'm I think I'm now.
But yeah, I could do this, I reckon.
Yeah.
I could do what they want me to do.
Dave, I'm talking Australia right now, but I don't know that much about America.
I imagine that similar over there, but they can only hold it for two terms anyway.
Here, people, you know, sometimes they just keep holding it.
And there's.
We're looking at you, Howard.
Yeah. Get off it, Howard.
Get off the throne.
Get off the throne.
Get off the pot, Howard.
I've been shit for ages.
I'm full of shit.
I mean, you don't want me getting off now.
It's a bit of a mess.
When Clinton played the saxophone on the Arsenio Hall show, he was described by some religious
conservatives as the MTV president.
He was like a cool president.
He was the first baby boomer president.
He was like, people thought he was cool.
It's so funny.
Yeah, of course.
The baby boomers at one point were the-
Yeah, the new young thing.
Yeah.
I mean, babies in their name.
Yeah.
Wow.
So the MTV president.
Yeah.
And that was from conservative pundits? Yeah, they were saying it was a bad thing. Oh, they're trying to put him down. Yeah. Wow. So the MTV president. Yeah. And that that was from conservative pundits.
Yeah. They were saying it is a bad thing. Yeah. They're trying to put him down. Yeah. Can I use
the word pejorative there? It's like, yeah. It's like saying, um, he's just a TikTok president.
Yeah. Yeah. You know, it's that MTV was the TikTok of the time. But like the funny thing would be
that a lot of people are like, yeah, he is, isn't he? Let's all vote for him. Exactly. Which either way, there's no substance to it. He played saxophone on a TV show.
Whoa. Whoa. He's got my vote.
But his presidency was not without scandal. Seriously, there were so many,
but we're going to talk about one in particular. We've done the hair.
We've done the hair. We've done Trooper Gate. I need to introduce our other main character, Monica Samil Lewinsky, born in San Francisco
in 1973.
She grew up in an affluent family in Southern California in the West Side Brentwood area
of Los Angeles and later in Beverly Hills.
Following her high school graduation in 1991, Lewinsky attended Santa Monica College, which
is a two-year college, while working for the drama department at Beverly Hills High School and a Thai shop.
Bit of fun.
Spelling?
Which type?
TIE.
Ah, that's pretty cool.
What were you hoping for?
We thought like a beautiful-
Thai restaurant.
You know, TIE, restaurant.
We have to up his meds.
I think her having a background in tyres probably helped, you know, they had a system.
He'd put a tyre around the door knob of the Oval Office, so she came in handy there as well.
Yeah.
Handy.
She sure did.
Don't come knocking if the Oval Office is a rob.
Mr President, Mr President.
Uh, the knob?
I'm not having sexual relations in here, if that's what you're asking.
The knob?
Look at the knob, please.
Can I draw your attention to the knob?
Not that one.
Mr. President.
Mr. President is such a funny phrase.
Mr. President.
Mr. President.
There's no way you can say that that isn't funny. Yeah. Mr. President.
Always funny. Always funny. And I'm going to say it again today. And Dave, I encourage
you to as well. Jess, you too. I'm not sure. I'm not sure if I want to. It's too powerful.
It's too powerful. But what if someone like, um, was late for an engagement and they were
talking to the president? What could they say? I guess if that was me, if I was late to an engagement, if the president and I had agreed
on a time and I was arriving after that time, I think what I would probably say just to
address it early would be, sorry sorry I'm late Mr. President.
That's what I think of her.
Is that the Independence Day?
Yeah.
Randy Rhoades.
Randy Rhoades.
And I think of Jess's impression
not the actual movie.
And what is it?
He's like a plumber or something, but he's-
He's a pilot.
A pilot.
He's a pilot.
I thought it was one of those movies where it was a guy who was like, you know, they're so far
out of their depth.
He's like, he's all we got.
No, he's like.
All right, so you pull up on this handle and that'll make you go, I got it.
Send us in.
Happy guys.
No, if I remember correctly, he's like a, he's a bit of a washed up pilot, but when
he was good, he was one of the best.
Yeah.
And the president is also a pilot.
So the president's off in a plane fight, like fighting from the front, like a true
leader and then they're like, Oh no, we're with that.
And it's Bill Pullman, right?
Yeah, that's the president.
And they're like, Oh God, we're really, we're outnumbered and we're lost here.
And then you hear, sorry, I'm late Mr. President.
And he's in a jet.
It's very good stuff. We got to do that in the Dugong movie club at some point. Yes. I want I'm late Mr. President and he's in a jet. It's very good stuff.
We got to do that in the Dugong movie club at some point.
Yes, I want to watch Independence Day. I saw it at the Flix years ago.
Wow. Really?
And you'll see that line and go, oh, Jess really overdoes it. It's actually a bit more
paid back than I guess. It's always so disappointing.
Just like a butler, sorry, I'm late Mr. President.
He's actually quite nice about it, but I'm always like, sorry, I'm late. Great line.
One of my favorite lines in a film.
OK, so she's working at a tire shop in 93.
She enrolled at Lewis and Clark College in Portland, Oregon,
graduating with a bachelor's degree in psychology in 1995.
Writing for the Washington Post in 1998.
So many of the references I use are Washington Post articles from 1998.
There's millions of them.
Oh, that's around the time Independence Day came out.
Well, actually, one of them that I'm going to read is just a review of Independence Day.
Anyway, so Jeff Leene says Monica Lewinsky got from Lewis and Clark to the White House
through the intervention of retired New York insurance magnate Walter Kaye,
a friend of Hillary Clinton and Lewinsky's family, according to a government
investigator. Kay also is a large contributor to the Democratic Party and was once an overnight
guest at the White House. Kay and his wife Selma have given at least 388,000 to the Democratic
National Committee since Clinton was elected in 1992 and about 80,000 more to other Democratic
committees and candidates, including Clinton, according to federal campaign records.
So a family connection, a family friend.
He was an intermediary. He was like, hey, I know this young lady who wants to get into politics.
And I've donated nearly four hundred thousand dollars, over four hundred thousand dollars.
I think this is pretty rare in politics, isn't it?
I think so, yeah. And that's why it's so noteworthy. Yes. This psychology major gets an internship at the White House.
Yeah. It's not easy who you know.
No, no, no, no, no.
It's only what you know, but she does know psychology.
Exactly. And that's important.
Yeah. Do you think she said, I don't want to work at the White House?
Yeah. And they went, you're in.
Well, you have to. She did a master's in reverse.
Reverse psychology.
So, yeah, with the assistance of a family friend, Lewinsky secured an unpaid
summer White House internship in the office of White House chief of staff, Leon Panetta.
She moved to Washington DC and took up a position in July of 1995.
I'm pretty sure while she was in DC for the internship, she was like, Oh no, I
thought she was living in like a family, an apartment, the family owned, but she
was living in an apartment at the Watergate Hotel, I think with her mum.
Like.
She was living at the Watergate?
Her family's wealthy as well.
During the scandal?
No.
Post scandal.
Was she there?
She was there.
Was she one of the ones who broke in?
Does this one go all the way to the top?
Yeah. Duh. one of the ones you broke in? Does this one go all the way to the top? Uh, yeah.
Duh.
So from, uh, Jeff Lean again from the Washington post, one white house intern
who worked near Lewinsky during the summer of 1995 recalled that she seemed
obsessed with Clinton and portrayed herself as having an uncommon amount of
interaction with him.
She would come into our office and tell stories, said the intern who asked not to
be identified. It would be things like she got a message from the president and he needed
to see her as soon as possible or the flowers she got on her desk were from the president.
The intern scoffed. I would think, right, well, I just got a call from the Kremlin.
Equally ridiculous.
Yeah. It just seemed rather unlikely. After a while, I just couldn't believe her anymore.
So she's sort of like, yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever. This one was just talking shit.
But another former intern, Shannon Joyce, a 22-year-old George Washington University senior,
who worked in the same office as Lewinsky during the fall of 1995,
remembers her coworker merely as extroverted, hardworking, and ambitious.
Obviously, to work in the White House for nothing, you have to admire the president and believe in
his policies. But Lewinsky said nothing out of the nothing, you have to admire the president and believe in his policies.
But Lewinsky said nothing out of the ordinary, Joyce recalled.
So that's where it gets a little bit interesting as well, because this is an
only of a lot of the articles I read.
A lot of them are very like unkind to Lewinsky.
This one at least tries to be somewhat balanced in terms of like, well, one
person says this, but another person's like, no, she's just an outgoing person.
She's a young woman who's very bubbly and extroverted. And that kind of stands out in
the White House, which is quite sort of stuffy and, and like proper. And she's kind of a
bit more like, hey, you know?
It's so funny, like the person going every, like clearly that's very possible that she was getting flowers from and stuff.
And if that's true, that's weird in itself, but not from her that she's receiving flowers from the president.
It's weird on the president, isn't it?
Yeah.
But that isn't exactly the stand that anyone takes.
Right.
Ever.
That's so weird.
It's really weird.
So, um, she obviously, yeah,, she did she did a good job.
She was offered a paid position in December.
And she went to work in the White House Office of Legislative Affairs.
And in April. So that's December of 95.
Whoa. Whoa.
We just cracked this open.
I think we cracked up wide open. Oh, my God.
You are so good at this.
Yeah, I'm on the scent.
As soon as you gave me those extra meds, my smell really came good.
You just gave him a bunch of ketamine, right?
Pretty sniffing right now.
I can smell colours.
So that was December of 95.
In April of 96, only a few months later,
her superiors relocated her job to the Pentagon
because they felt she was spending too much time around Clinton.
Oh.
They were in fact correct in thinking Lewinsky was spending a bit too much time around the
president, but by the time they moved her, if their plan was to prevent a scandalous
situation, they were too late.
Right.
So who was worried about her spending too much time?
Like her superiors.
Clinton's same or her superiors. Yeah. They weren't worried like, hey, you need to be focusing on this important work you're doing.
They're like, oh, he's fucking her and this is bad for her.
This is going to be bad.
Our job of getting him elected again.
Yeah.
That's so funny.
Move her quick.
Just move her to the Pentagon.
Don't just say, hey, Bill, what the fuck are you doing?
Yeah.
And say, hey, are you OK with this?
Well, this is obviously a man in a real position of power,
a lot older than you.
You OK?
Oh, why would they ask a young woman that, Dave?
Why?
Nothing sus about a 47, 48-year-old man
and a 22-year-old girl.
And he's the president of the United States.
You are.
You're talking about today's standards and putting them on the 90s.
Consent wasn't invented yet.
Power dynamics didn't exist yet.
We've brought those in more recently and they're awesome.
So, yeah, back in the November of 95, according to ABC News,
during a government shutdown that drastically reduced staffing at the White House,
Lewinsky found herself delivering a slice of pizza to the Oval Office.
In a flirtatious moment, she revealed the top of her thong underwear
to the president as she walked away.
Later, he summoned her back to the Oval Office for the first of many sexual
encounters that would occur over the course of several months
So that was that was all bringing a man a pizza and you don't think you get fucking a gobby. Come on
You bring me a pizza you get okay, that's how this works that's you're giving the gobby. Yeah
Cuz somebody's brought you pizza. Yeah, okay
Yeah. Because somebody's brought you pizza.
Yeah.
Okay.
How else do you pay for the pizza?
Yeah.
How do you pay for a pizza?
What I love about that whole thing is like, it was a government shutdown, so the pizza
boy wasn't there.
Yeah.
We usually have a pizza boy at the White House.
Obviously.
But we just had to get one of our other young staffs to deliver the pizza.
The president's hungry.
You know.
Pizza boy's off.
In terms of things that are not very sexy, the top of a thong, the top of
pants.
What do you mean?
Ooh la la.
That's salacious.
Are you kidding me?
Wait, is that what we got a tramp stamp to?
Yeah.
Now things are heating up.
Now things are heating up.
So he summoned her back for a second slice.
I'm picturing-
For a second slice. Actually now I'm coming slice. I'm picturing- A second slice.
Actually now I'm coming around, I'm picturing Kim from Kevin Kim. She loves the, yeah, now
I get it. That's pretty odd.
Because you're picturing Kim now.
Kim, yeah.
Just double checking that we're all on the same page.
Kim's a babe.
By April of 1996, Clinton was up for re-election. Rumours of his questionable relationship with Lewinsky, then a White House intern working
in the office, yeah, as we've already known, stoked fears among the president's staff that
it might jeopardise his campaign.
So yeah, Lewinsky, she sent off to the Pentagon where she met and befriended Linda Tripp,
who had previously worked in the Clinton White House.
The two grew close and eventually Lewinsky began sharing details of her
sexual dalliances with the president, with her new friend.
She's, you know, they're just a couple of girls having girl chat at the office.
Yeah, and her friend's like, yeah, and I had sex with a Kremlin.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
And I had sex with Gorbachev.
Yeah.
Gobichov?
Gobichov. Is there something in that? Gobichov. That's why I went quiet for a second.
I was like, there's something there.
Make the link.
Make it the link.
That's funny.
Mr. President, tear down this pants.
That's good, Dave.
That's good stuff.
This pants is very good.
So Linda Tripp was, she was a bit older.
She was about 24 years old at the Monica Lewinsky.
Had been at the White House during the election campaign.
She was a bit older.
She was a bit older.
She was a bit older.
She was a bit older.
She was a bit older.
She was a bit older.
She was a bit older.
She was a bit older.
She was a bit older. She was a bit older. She was a bit older. She was app was, she was a bit older.
She was about 24 years old.
The Monica Lewinsky had been at the White House during the George H.W. Bush administration
and had stayed on when Clinton became president in 93.
An article from the Washington Post in 98 stated that during the summer of 94, senior
White House aides wanted Tripp removed from the White House and transferred her to the
public affairs office in the Pentagon,
which raised her salary by 20 grand, which is a lot in the early nineties.
And the article doesn't really get to the bottom of why the White House wanted to move
Tripp.
Oh dear.
Like, well, they weren't sure if it was that like, yeah, I really don't know.
Basically it's gone.
We'll pay a bit extra to shut up and go away.
Go work somewhere else.
Yeah, yeah.
But it ended up being kind of fortuitous in the years to come.
So something else to note is that Linda Tripp had worked in a position at the White House
in the council's office under Bernard Nussbaum, amazing, and his deputy Vince Foster.
Vince Foster died by suicide in 1993 and Linda was reportedly the last person to see him
alive.
Then we introduced this other character, Lucian Goldberg, who had a literary agency and became
known as a promoter of right-wing tell-all attack books, according to the New York Times.
So she was the US agent for the memoirs of Prince Charles's former valet, which were
blocked for publication in England by Queen Elizabeth.
She was sort of known for those kind of books.
She was the agent for former
detective Mark Furem's bestselling account of the O.J. Simpson trial. She promoted a conspiracy
theory book about the suicide death of Vince Foster and several books dealing with Clinton's
sexual infidelities. None of these books, the Clinton ones never got published, but while she's
sort of working on a proposal for the book about Vince Foster, she met Linda Tripp
and the two became friends.
And when Monica Lewinsky started to tell Tripp
about her relationship with the president,
Tripp mentioned it to Goldberg.
And Goldberg told Tripp
to start secretly recording the conversations.
Oh.
She said, it's legal in Maryland.
And I was like, okay.
And then I was like, but I and then I was looked up, but
I'm like, they're not in Maryland.
So I'm not entirely sure.
There's got to be a reason for that, but it didn't make a whole lot of sense.
Maybe she's like, it's fine, it's fine, it's fine.
You can totally do that.
Girls Weekend in Maryland?
What do you think?
Maybe you can publish it in Maryland or something like that.
Yeah, I'm not really sure.
But I thought they were going to try and cut her in.
Hey, tell her to sell this.
We can sell a million copies of this.
No, they're like, fuck her.
Yeah. You secretly record it.
Linda Tripp, you dog.
She's like, this is salacious.
So, Goldberg- She thought she was her friend.
I know, that's really sad.
Heartbreaking.
From The Washington Post again.
New York literary agent Lucianne Goldberg, who encouraged Tripp to record Lewinsky,
has said she has a tape of one of Goldberg, who encouraged Tripp to record Lewinsky, has said she has
a tape of one of Goldberg's conversations with Tripp in which Goldberg erroneously advised
her it was legal to tape in Maryland.
The Baltimore Sun reported last month, however, that the Radio Shack employee who sold Tripp
the recording device says he told her it was illegal to use without first obtaining the
other party's consent.
Tripp has denied through a spokesman that she was told that that is so funny that
she's like buying a recording device and it's obviously a bit sketchy.
So the radio shack guys like, you know, you have to have someone's
consent to record them, right?
Yeah.
Just put it in the back.
Yeah.
Jess, I tried to tell you consent didn't exist back then.
So she's like, he said some words, but I didn't know what that was.
What was that?
What was that?
What was that?
What was that?
Like Charlie Brown's teacher is just honking kind of.
Yeah.
That's it.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
That's what you hear when I speak.
You know here when you're at JB High, if you buy an item, they go through all the ways
it's legal and illegal to use that item.
I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Whatever.
What button do I press to skip this?
I'm buying an SD card.
Chill out.
I'm a real person.
You can't skip me.
I skip. I'm a real person.
You can't skip me.
I skip.
I'm pressing their nose.
Skip.
Oh, no.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I've read their terms and conditions.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Tick, tick, tick.
Shut up.
Would you like us to SMS you a receipt?
No, just give me the paper one.
Okay.
Thank you for shopping with us today.
Fuck off.
I say.
You're a real piece of work.
Oh, I'm a nightmare customer.
Yeah.
I worked in retail for quite a long time.
So you're, you're, you're allowed to.
Exactly.
You would think that that would make me nicer to retail workers, but if anything, I think,
no, I've done my time.
Yeah.
I suffered.
So now you have to.
Now you have to.
Now I walk in before they're open and I say, hello.
Hello.
Can I get any help over here?
Hello.
I'm really fun.
Anyway, so Lewinsky, she's gossiping with a friend, usually over the phone and
getting her advice and help in drafting love notes to the president.
In a 2001 interview with Nancy Collins of ABC news, Tripp said, I was fascinated.
Could he be that reckless?
Could he be that arrogantly reckless to philander with the child? I was reeling from the horror of it all.
Wait, hang on. How old was she? 22. Which, I mean, you made a 22 year old now.
You're like, okay, you are a baby. Can I say she's reeling from the horror,
but also secretly recording conversations and selling them.
Yeah, she's reeling, but she's not saying, hey, are you okay?
Are you all right? Yeah, this power imbalance is.
Hey, sorry, can you repeat that?
My recording?
I mean, sorry, I miss what you say.
Can you repeat that?
Honestly, I think in the 90s and it was like, holy shit, you're fucking the president.
People are going, are you sure you're every this is that he's way more powerful than you?
Yeah, I don't.
I mean, I mean, I was a child in the 90s.
So maybe I.
You what?
Oh, what?
Sorry, which 90s are we talking about?
This woman's fucking George Washington.
Sorry, I misunderstood.
I thought we were talking about the 1590s.
Yeah, yeah, no, 19.
And that was BC.
1590 BC.
Yeah. We all remember it well.
So Lewinsky often recounted her exchanges with the president, including their late night phone conversations.
In that same 2001 interview, Tripp admitted that she found Lewinsky immature and a groupie, but she said she was more than happy to listen to her.
She's not very kind.
Such a recorder.
Tripp's not coming off great.
No.
The ABC News article also includes transcripts of a few of their conversations.
One in particular did make me laugh.
Okay.
I'll play both characters.
Wow.
Look.
Generous.
Look.
Do you want to come here and play a character?
No, no, no.
I'm actually so excited to hear you do both.
Do you want to come and do a character?
I mean, no. You got the fucking drama degree, Mr. Watergate. Now that Dave's excited. Now'm obviously so excited to hear you do both. Do you want to come into a character? I mean, no, I-
You've got the fucking drama degree, Mr. Warwick.
Now that Dave's excited.
Otherwise, I think I'd like to put myself forward for any future roles.
But show us how it's done first.
Okay.
Lewinsky.
I- Listen, you'll get mad at me.
You know what I said at the end?
Trip.
What?
Lewinsky.
The worst I could say. We were
getting off the phone, I assume. We were getting off and I'm like, all right, I love you, butt head.
Trip. No. Lewinsky. Called him butt head. Trip. You didn't. Lewinsky. I did. Trip. And what he say,
Lewinsky said, that was it. He just kind of hung up or I hung up. I was like, Oh my God,
what the hell just came out of my mouth. Trip. Butt head. Lewinsky. Butt head.
That's just funny to read that.
When you read that out, you go, well, she sounds like an old soul. Um,
you know, maybe she was 22 physically, but emotionally she does sound pretty mature.
Yeah.
But, all right, President Butt-Head.
All right, I love you, Butt-Head.
But that does genuinely sound like something I would say.
Yeah, that's fine.
Yeah, I think of you as an old soul.
Which is what Leonardo DiCaprio says about his girlfriends.
I assume.
Yeah, they're old souls.
Here's the thing.
As I do get older and I gain slightly more self-awareness, I start
to go, oh, I think I might be terrible.
You know what I mean?
I go, oh, oh, okay.
I've always had that.
About me?
Yeah.
Nightmare.
And yet here we are, nearly 10 years like, what the fuck are you guys doing?
Are you just trapped?
No. Should we talk about this off air? Yeah.
Off air. Fuck off, mate. It's not radio. They won't have you back.
From ABC News again. It was October 3rd, 1997 that Tripp recorded the first in a series of
many calls with Lewinsky in which they discussed everything from their workout and dieting schedules
to the details of Lewinsky's intimate relationship with Clinton.
Meanwhile, investigative journalist Michael Isikoff was looking into allegations of improper
behaviour towards women by Clinton when he learned that Tripp might have some relevant
information.
When he tracked down Tripp at the Pentagon, she told him about a young woman who had been
a White House intern and who was having a relationship with Clinton.
Tripp also relayed this information to lawyers for Paula Corbyns-Jones, who had filed a civil
lawsuit against Clinton alleging sexual harassment and civil rights violations while he was governor
of Arkansas.
Clinton had denied these allegations.
So there's kind of a few different-
Why are we even talking about it?
Why are we talking about it?
He said-
This guy sounds like a guy who's a straight shooter.
Oh my God. So he was just like a guy who's a straight shooter. Oh my God.
So he's, he was just like a grub forever.
Oh yeah.
And people have just enabled it.
Yep.
Ah.
And so there's these two different investigations going on, both of which
find out about Monica Lewinsky and about these tapes.
So they're like, okay, well that's probably quite relevant to what
we're investigating as well.
So Lewinsky of course is completely unaware unaware that Trip had betrayed her confidence and
had been recording their conversations.
And she said, like, it sounds like it's a, for Lewinsky, it's a happy relationship.
She understands what's going on apart from the power imbalance and all that sort of thing.
It's not like she is like talking about it like it's a boyfriend.
It's like a, yeah, it's a fun little tryst, something like, yeah, she's it's that forbidden
thing and that's kind of fun and sexy and whatever.
And and I will say that she maintains the entire time that it was totally mutual and
consensual.
Yeah.
She doesn't hold any of that against him much later in life, like much more recently.
She sort of acknowledges that kind of power dynamic was fucked, but she still says it was consensual and neutral.
Because it is the kind of, I mean, there's a reason why that sort of stuff is not really acceptable anymore, is because of that power imbalance.
Totally. So along with the recordings of the conversations, Tripp also persuaded Lewinsky to save the gifts Clinton had given her and to not dry clean a semen stained blue dress to keep it as an insurance policy.
Who told her that?
Trip.
Told Lewinsky?
Yeah.
And at this stage, she still doesn't know that Tripp's.
Yeah, no, she has no idea.
She's like, insurance policy slash, it could be pretty good sense.
That's evidence.
And maybe you could sell it at some sort of a Macy's.
Are they the ones who do the auction?
A Macy's auction.
Who am I thinking about? Who's that big auctioneer?
Sotheby's. Sotheby's.
Macy's. Macy's. That's a big department store.
That's where the nanny shops.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. She loves Macy's.
Never retail.
You can't be retail.
So that Paula Jones case, that woman who had accused Clinton of sexual harassment, they
kind of brought Lewinsky in and she submitted an affidavit that denied any physical relationship
with Clinton.
Right.
Oh, they said, hey, do you want to make a complaint too?
And she said, that's not happening.
She said, absolutely not.
No, I, that nothing has ever happened.
She signed an affidavit.
Um, the story broke in mainstream press in, uh, in January in the Washington
post, it swelled for several days, despite swift denials from Clinton.
And, uh, people were like demanding answers.
So on January 26, president Clinton standing with his wife spoke at a
White House press conference and issued a denial in which he said, now I have to go back to work on my
State of the Union speech and I worked on it until pretty late last night, but I want
to say one thing to the American people.
I want you to listen to me.
I'm going to say this again.
I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Ms. Lewinsky.
I never told anybody to lie. Not a single
time. Never. These allegations are false and I need to go back to work for the American
people. Thank you.
Man, that woman is so cold.
That woman. Then he says Miss Lewinsky.
Yeah. That's why I got to confuse with the Abbott thing because she does say that man
I will not take or not be lectured on
misogyny by that man.
It's a great speech.
Great speech.
So the matter instantly occupied the news like it's huge and Lewinsky spent the next
weeks hiding from public attention in her mother's residence at the Watergate complex.
News of Lewinsky's affair with Andy Blaylor, her former high school drama instructor, also
came to light and he turned over to the investigator star, who'll come up again later, various
souvenirs, photographs and documents that Lewinsky had sent him and his wife during
the time she was at the White House.
I don't know how or why that was relevant, but of course this news of like an alleged
affair comes up so they dig into her past and find she's also had an affair with her former high
school teacher.
While she was a student.
No, once she, once she graduated.
Rather than say otherwise, is this guy going to get arrested or something?
Yeah.
What is starting to sound to me like she's the common denominator here.
So, you know, I'm trying to see both sides of this, but oh boy.
Yeah.
She's had, she's got a tie.
She's twice.
Married.
She's, she's twice had affairs with old married men.
Yeah.
Yep.
She's a home wrecker.
Yep.
I think.
Stamp!
Yep.
Matt's got his home wrecker stamp out.
I got my home wrecker tar, I got my home wre's got his homewrecker stamp out. I got my homewrecker tar, I got my homewrecker feathers, and my homewrecker stamp.
Just to make sure, don't move Monica at all.
Stamp!
That's the sound of the stamp.
Feathers!
That's the sound of the tar.
He is good at sounds.
Yep.
So for the next several months and through the summer, the media debated whether or not
an affair had occurred and whether or not Clinton had lied or obstructed justice, but
nothing could be definitively established beyond the taped recordings because Lewinsky
was unwilling to discuss the affair or testify about it.
Throughout the scandal, Hillary Clinton remained supportive of her husband.
In an appearance on NBC's Today, the day after his I do not have sexual relations with
that woman speech, Hillary said, the great story here for anybody willing to find it and write about it
and explain it is this vast right wing conspiracy that has been conspiring against my husband since
the day he announced for president. Babe. Hillary babe.
Have you, do you have any, I mean, how would you know, but do you have any thoughts on how much she knew?
Do you have any, I mean, how would you know, but do you have any thoughts on how much she knew?
I've seen like snippets of a documentary that was about Hillary, where they kind of talk about it.
And like talk about him telling her.
And I don't know at what point he told her she was in the White House for some of these
dalliances, but it's a big White House.
You can be in the same building. And it's a preview.
Like it sounds like it's, he's just been a cheater forever.
This is not the first thing that he's been accused of.
Yes.
So yeah, I don't really know.
I think.
Cause it's like, yeah, she like, uh, I'm just turning a blind eye.
I know he's fucked, but it's business.
Or is she like, I trust him, I love him.
I mean, whatever.
Fuck.
Yeah, it's not really clear.
And look, I think you can, there's a lot out there about it.
And I could have gone really deep down a rabbit hole.
And I was sort of like, I'm gonna get lost in this.
Yeah, it's not really the story.
I was just curious.
Cause I just wasn't sure if she's like,
since being like, yeah, no, no, he's fucked.
But you know, we're kind of, we're mainly in this for political careers.
That's what I was going to say is that like, I think a lot of people sort of say
their relationship is really more of a business relationship rather than a than like a romantic one.
If that makes sense, like, you know, even when he was running for president,
part of his campaign or something he would say would be like, if you vote for me,
you kind of get two presidents for the price of one.
Oh, right.
Because she was a very ambitious and is a very ambitious woman and like very smart,
successful in her own right.
And so, yeah, I don't know.
I don't know if it was just kind of like a, let's be a power couple together.
And who knows?
I think there's a lot of theories.
Yeah.
But she has to have known and she definitely knew at some point and they stuck together.
So I'm giving him one last chance. Okay. Okay. All right. All right, Bill.
Got it. Any more weird affairs?
I think what did I say? 21 and that's it. And we're up to 20 now.
Fool me once. Fool me 20 once.
Shame on me.
Is that good?
That's very good.
That's really good.
Fool me 20 once.
The youngest child of like, I get a laugh.
You like?
You like it?
You like it?
Tell me it was funny.
That wasn't me, right?
Say you're proud.
Say you're proud of me.
Pathetic.
Fool me 21. Especially when you're actually. Say you're proud of me. For me 21. Pathetic.
For me 21.
Especially when you're actually the middle child of this podcast.
True.
That's why I act out so much.
Yeah.
And that's why you forget me so much.
Yeah.
Who said that?
So forgettable.
Forgettable?
Anyway, Dave, I'm proud of as punch as what you've done today.
Fuck.
Thank you.
This is a great story you're telling.
Oh, I need that so badly.
Let's put it on the fridge right over here.
Put this report on the fridge.
It's gorgeous.
It's my favourite one yet.
You've done it again, Dave.
Very proud of you.
So it wasn't until-
Oh, hey Jess.
Hey.
Sorry, I was just going to, could I read sentence?
Dave and-
Dave, just let me know if you need to talk.
Thank you.
I technically just wrote this report, but I will take the credit.
Okay.
Should.
You make everything better, Dave.
It wasn't until July, six months after the story first broke, that Lewinsky received
transactional immunity in exchange for grand jury testimony concerning her relationship
with Clinton.
Great.
So it was like, we know you lied on an affidavit and that is, you know, an offense.
You could get in a lot of trouble for that.
But we'll let that go.
You don't lie to a chemist.
Yeah.
I assume they have to do them to chemists over there?
Oh, I see.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Get a stat deck.
Chemists or a dentist?
Yeah, who else could do stat decks?
Teachers, I think?
It's the same thing, isn't it?
A stat deck and an affidavit.
It's that kind of thing of just like a...
Think an affidavit you have before dinner.
Is that right?
And the stat deck, I guess, would be after in that way.
Am I getting confused?
Can I have some more med?
More med? More med for me?
More med for Matt.
You see, the stat deck is a bit of a digestie.
That's funny.
So she, yeah, finally she's going to like actually tell the truth.
She also turned over the semen stained dress.
Oh, that's what I do with a semen stained cushion.
Turn it over.
It should be right.
It should be right to stand up like that.
She's got the dress, you're like.
Good as new.
I can wear that tomorrow.
That's how I do it. It should be right. It should be right to stand up. She's got the dress. You're like, good as new.
I can wear that tomorrow.
That's how I get two days out of it.
Sleeping inside out.
She's wearing an inside out dress to work.
All good.
Bad cut out.
Those are the same as day.
They did not seep through.
Fural.
Thick dress.
Yeah. Don't worry. I wear them thick.
So at this point, Kenneth Starr, Ken Starr is investigating.
So is he a cop or is he like a- Ken Starr.
He is.
Is he like in a turn- I have it written down somewhere here, but I'll just-
That is.
What a name. I missed that before- That is, what a name.
I missed that before.
That's such a Hollywood name.
Is that a double R on Star?
He was independent counsel.
Gotcha.
Ken Star.
Ken Star, isn't that great?
Kenneth Winston Star.
Oh my God, that's even better.
So he was independent counsel and so, like, his role was basically to investigate, like,
the politicians of any dodgy stuff.
Try and get to the truth.
Exactly.
So the dress is turned over to his investigation.
The FBI tested the dress and matched the semen stain to a blood sample from Clinton,
thereby providing unambiguous circumstantial evidence that proves the relationship despite
Clinton's official denials.
Oh, just because he came on a dress?
All of a sudden that's sexual?
Anyone could have been wearing that dress.
That could have been any circumstances.
She might not have been in the room.
If I had a dime for every time I've come on something at work.
I'm sorry, I had to clean it up with something.
I grabbed the nearest dress.
And yes, this young lady in my office was wearing the dress at the time.
OK. But she works for me.
Yeah. First she brings me pizza and now I use a dress to clean the sun. OK.
What would you have done?
She was very happy to help the president.
Yes.
Clean up a mess.
Let me go back to my statement.
I did not have sexual relations with that woman, but I did have sexual relations with that
dress.
Absolutely.
That is a sexy dress.
God bless America and God bless this cum on the dress.
And a blue...
I was just trying to-
Is that- is that- just if I can ask, when you started the sentence, is that where you
were hoping it would go?
No, I wasn't really sure, but I- I do love that sort of hyperbolic God bless America
stuff and I thought there might have been something in it, but there wasn't.
It was okay.
Just cum.
It was cum in it, but it wasn't. Just come. I mean, it was coming. It was coming.
There's nothing more patriotic than turning a blue dress into a star spangled banner.
Sprog spangled dress.
I just thought it is look like to some people, the president's come
would be like that is that's gold.
That is like, you know, about that come is is
that is not your average cum.
That is presidential splooge. And people should be saluting it. Yeah.
Seamen at ease. That's sort of thing. Yeah. Anyway, we'll cut all of that. AJ, will we? AJ? Comedy festival this year, quite a few people told me, AJ, that you
do not cut things out. So just putting out there.
Well, I think it's because he doesn't listen. So I think if that's feedback that you actually
want to give him, you're going to have to contact him in a different way.
Yeah, I'm going to have to corner him somewhere. He doesn't listen.
He takes the file and he uploads the file.
Yeah, and we're very grateful for that. We pay him well for it.
He puts the song on at the start and the end. Does he uploads the file. Yeah. And we're very grateful for that. We pay him well for it. He puts the song on the side of the end.
Does he put the song on the side of the end?
You don't even bother to do that anymore.
So finally, with that kind of evidence, Clinton finally admitted in a taped grand
jury testimony on August 17, 1998, that he had engaged in an improper physical
relationship with Lewinsky.
That evening, he gave a nationally televised statement, admitting that his
relationship with Lewinsky was not appropriate and it was wrong.
And he admits to misleading people, including his wife.
There's news footage of like people in bars watching this statement, all going
like, Oh my God, that is fair.
Oh my God.
It was big news.
Our horny president has been up to no good.
I don't want a president who fucks.
Not like this.
Not like this.
I think that's fair enough.
So did he give the blood sample?
He must have been like, oh, I hope that's spunk as someone else's.
Oh God.
Yeah, he must have been like, I think I'm fucked here.
Yeah, this is the last roll of the dice.
Hopefully there's a mix.
He probably tried to, like, bribe the lab and stuff.
Probably.
But does this not make you feel like a bit more trust in the office?
Because we're always like, they could sweep anything under the rug.
He didn't sweep this.
Mm.
Mm. I'm surprised that he didn't sweep this. Mm. Mm.
I'm surprised that he didn't, you know, it sounds like a few of the other earlier
stuff that has not been proven or denied when he was a governor or whatever.
But this, he hasn't made it, it hasn't gone away.
If you can't sweep-
The smoking gun, right?
If you can't sweep, you distract.
Yeah.
So this is obviously huge news.
Uh, far reaching consequences.
A quick side note from Wikipedia.
On the 20th of August, three days after Clinton testified on the Monica
Lewinsky scandal, operation infinite reach launched missile attacks against
Al Qaeda based in Afghanistan and the pharmaceutical factory in Sudan in
retaliation for the 1998 United States embassy bombings.
Some countries, media outlets, protesters, and Republicans
accused Clinton of ordering the attacks as a diversion.
The attacks also drew parallels to the then recently released movie
Wag the Dog, which features a fictional president
faking a war in Albania to distract attention from a sex scandal.
Oh, wow.
Administration officials denied any connection
between the missile strikes and the ongoing scandal,
and the National Commission on terrorist attacks
Investigated and they found no reason to do it. I got the idea from the wag the dog movie. Isn't that crazy?
It's the president mr. President. I've just seen the most transparent is that
No, no, we were gonna do this now anyway. I
Think there's other examples of like yeah, like so like yeah
Yeah, a lot of wars.
Just use, hey, look over there.
You know, I mean, that's that's modern politics.
What's that? Things aren't going my way.
Yeah. Well, did you know that these people are coming in and taking your job?
Yeah, they make you look over there so that you're not seeing the fuck
thing they're doing over there.
Just come on the dress or whatever.
Figuratively. Yeah. Often it there. Just come on the dress. Or whatever. Figuratively.
Yeah.
Often it's more-
Or literally.
Blood on the-
Blood on the- some money on the- oh no, they're going, look at the blood.
We're killing people over there.
So don't look at this money we're hoarding over here.
Sorry, that was probably a bit political for this show.
I know a lot of people want impartiality and they want me- want to hear both sides?
Well, here's the other side.
Hey, some politicians are all right.
Hey, guys, money.
It's useful. Yeah, it can be quite useful.
Yeah, I'd like some of it.
End of story.
For the other side of the story, let's I mean, I'm obviously representing the commies.
Dave is a capo.
What do you reckon?
I just said, yeah, money is useful. Dave is a capo. What do you reckon? I just said, money is useful.
Money makes the world go round. Okay.
Commies don't listen, do they?
They don't like to listen.
Well, we're under the bed. Okay. It's hard to hear under here. Everything sounds muffled.
You know, like Charlie Brown's teacher, for example. I think that I didn't understand
at the time, but it's proved very useful.
Yeah. Really great topical reference.
45 minutes later. You said that today, right understand at the time, but it's proved very useful. Yeah, a really great topical reference. 45 minutes later.
You said that today, right?
Yeah.
Okay, great.
Yeah.
In his deposition for the Jones lawsuit, it was the one where the woman was accusing
him of other sexual harassment, Clinton denied having sexual relations with Lewinsky.
Based on the evidence, a blue dress with Clinton's semen, Stark included that the president's
sworn testimony was perjurious.
He basically tried to get away with it on a technicality.
The question was, have you ever had sexual relations with Monica Lewinsky?
And Clinton tries to get around it based on the definition of sexual relations.
He later said, I thought the definition included any activity by me where I was the actor and
came in contact with those parts of the body, which had been explicitly listed.
In other words, he denied that he ever contacted Lewinsky's genitalia, groin,
breasts, inner thighs or buttocks, because that's how they were, like, very explicitly
listed.
They listed- Oh, they said, have you ever had done this?
Yeah.
Or this? Or this?
And they didn't mention a gobby.
Yeah, they didn't mention-
No, no, no, hang on.
Effectively claimed that the agreed upon definition of sexual relations
included giving oral sex, but excluded receiving oral sex.
Oh, OK. Remember, Clinton is a lawyer, so he's trying to sneak around,
but he's also kind of dobbing on himself for being a selfish lover.
Oh, of course, I've never done that.
She's done it to me. She's done everything to me. I've never done that. She's done it to me.
She's done everything to me.
I've never done that.
Geez.
Yeah.
Clinton has also said there's not a sexual relationship, an improper sexual relationship
or any other kind of improper relationship, which he defended as truthful because his
use of the present tense, arguing it depends on what the meaning of the word is is.
Oh my God.
What?
How did he get away with it?
It's such a lawyer move.
Um, Lewinsky's testimony to the star commission, however, contradicted
Clinton's claim of being totally passive in their encounters.
Cause he's kind of like, I never touched her.
But I laid back.
I, yeah.
Oh, this is kind of like soaking.
I was basically asleep and I woke up and I I'd be like, oh my god, what's
happening? It's all a dream. A beautiful dream. So it depends on what your definition of is
is and how you define sexual relations. I'd be so flustered like coming up against him.
What's your definition of is? Well, um, oh, is, okay, great. Is what is is. Um, yes.
Fantastic question.
Okay.
Is it's, um, ooh, um, no, just let him off.
That's fine.
Yeah.
That's, uh, yeah, he's got me there.
He is good.
He is good.
So two months after the Senate failed, uh, to convict him, President Clinton was held
in civil contempt of court by judge Susan Webber Wright for giving misleading testimony regarding his sexual relationship with Lewinsky.
He was fined $90,000.
And did he get himself off?
I mean.
Yeah.
And when he said the Senate didn't fine him, is that because like, you know, they're all
that the democratic majority in there?
They went, nah, he's good.
Yeah.
So a few Democratic members of Congress and most in the opposition Republican
party claimed that Clinton's giving false testimony and allegedly influencing
Lewinsky's testimony were crimes of obstruction of justice and perjury,
and thus, impeachable offenses.
So the House of Representatives voted to issue two articles of impeachment
against him, which
was followed by a 21 day trial in the Senate.
Clinton was acquitted on both counts as neither received the necessary two thirds majority
vote, and he was therefore able to remain in office.
There's a whole section on Wikipedia that details a bunch of hypocritical politicians
who had supported the impeachment, which is just a bit of fun.
So according to the British newspaper, The Guardian-
It is very funny that like the other people judging him, people are going, oh, I don't
want to, I'm going to glass house here.
Yeah, listen to these.
So you have Henry Hyde, Republican chair of the House Judiciary Committee and lead house
manager, also had an affair while in office as state legislator.
Hyde, aged 70 during the Lewinsky hearings, dismissed it as youthful indiscretion.
He was 41 at the time.
Dan Burton, another Republican, said, no one, regardless of what party they serve, no one,
regardless of what branch of government they serve, should be allowed to get away with
these alleged sexual improprieties.
In 1998, Burton admitted that he himself had had an affair in 1983, which
produced a child. No one. I repeat, no one. No one should be, I shouldn't be held accountable.
Just saying whatever needs to be said is some, I mean exactly what Clinton did. People push
back and say, but what's the definition of no? Yeah. Then we have Newt Gingrich. One
of the craziest names of all time.
Speaker of the House and leader of the Republican Revolution of 1994, admitted in 1998 to having
an affair with the House Agricultural Committee staffer Kalista Bizek while he was still married
to his second wife.
At the same time, he was leading the impeachment of Bill Clinton for perjury regarding an affair
with intern Monica Lewinsky.
I just feel like, yeah. Well, I mean, we're talking about distraction.
It's incredible.
Don't look at what I'm up to.
Then there's also Stephen C. Lattourette, voted to impeach Bill Clinton for the Lewinsky
scandal while he was having a long-term affair with his chief of staff.
Republican Helen Chenoweth-Hague, it's just not, it's not all men from Idaho, aggressively
called for the resignation of President Clinton and then admitted to her own six year affair
with a married rancher during the eighties.
Incredible stuff.
Look, and I don't think this is a double standard, but I think what she did was the worst of
the list.
I thought you were going to say it's empowering.
It's actually kind of sexy and empowering.
You're like, nah, she's the worst.
Because I think, you know, I mean, a man has certain needs and weaknesses where a woman...
They're only weak physically.
Yes. And I think that if we can't trust women, then, you know,
the whole basis of a society is coming down
down the drain.
In my experience, they don't even enjoy sex.
In my experience.
So why would she do that?
I love it when they dab on themselves.
It's so funny.
So it's good to be like, I never did any of that to her.
It's like, okay, so you're just admitting to being a shit lover.
Selfish.
I do see why, like, obviously, if they have an affair, I don't really care.
Like personally.
Yep.
I, if the circumstances are that it's the power imbalance, all that sort of stuff, but
he, you know, if you have an affair, that's between you and your partner, really.
Yeah.
To be judged on it.
If you're Hillary's mate, you're probably not loving it.
Yeah, that's right.
Yeah. But if you're a friend, you jump in there and bat for them.
But I do see how it is pretty dodgy that he's come out on national TV and said,
this lady's lying. Yeah.
I know about sex with her. And then he's had to backtrack and say, all right, I actually, I have.
And then he's also done it in court as well.
That's that is amazing that he's had what it's like.
She was a young intern as well.
Yeah, exactly. The circumstances are that, yeah, you are the president.
But apart from all that, what has he done wrong?
But I can't believe that he's able to survive.
The fact that he lied so like.
Dave, he doesn't just survive, he fucking thrives.
I can't believe it.
That's his first term, isn't it?
Or was that his second term?
First.
So he got re-elected after that then.
That's amazing.
Did he? I actually can't after that then. That's amazing. Did he?
I actually can't believe it.
I can't remember.
I remember him.
I do vaguely remember him recovering so that it was, you know, it's just this funny thing.
He's a scamp.
He was.
Oh Bill.
Oh Bill.
Oh Bill.
Glad boys will be boys.
He was a president from 93.
So yeah, he must have been re-elected around the same time that this came out.
Right? 93. When did it? So when was this? No, maybe he'd just been re-elected around the same time that this came out, right? 93.
When did it, so when was this?
No, maybe he, maybe he'd just been re-elected.
Okay.
Yep.
That makes more sense, I think.
But then he was able to hang on.
It was 98 that it came out.
Right.
But it happened earlier.
But yeah, then he was able to just hang on.
But yeah, the hypocrisy is crazy too.
So yeah, so yeah, he, second term would have been, yeah, 97.
Yeah. And I have like, this is a big news story.
And like I said, there's like a million other things happening all around the same time and all through his presidency and stuff.
I've just tried to kind of summarise this one thing, because again, like Dave said at the start, it was that thing of like, I know the name,
Lewinsky. I know that they had an affair, but I didn't really know all that much about it.
I knew the blue dress, but I didn't even know the circumstances really.
But Chelsea being a teenager at the time would have been fun for her.
She was 18, 17, 18.
Finding that out. Horrific.
And like the press are obviously hounding Monica as well.
Oh, my God. Yes. Awful for her.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. But trying to they're just doing their job,
trying to find the truth.
You're not going to.
Well, you're not casting aspersions on the fourth estate.
If the truth sells newspapers.
Well, well, one of the newspapers is the truth.
Good for that.
If you know what I mean.
If you know what I mean.
No further questions.
So obviously this whole scandal is, yeah, like I was saying, something we grew up
with, lots of other things have happened.
He came out of it relatively unscathed.
In fact, Clinton was selected as Times Man of the Year in 1992.
This is before all of that.
And then again in 1998, the year of the scandal, along with Ken Starr, the independent counsel
who investigated him.
The year of this scandal, he is Times Man of the Year.
That is also about like your influence or how famous and such you are.
Kitler did it one year, didn't he?
Yeah, it doesn't mean that you are the best person.
I know, but isn't that a bit fucking crazy though?
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, you've got to remember that the horsewoman of the year.
Sportswoman of the year.
The horsewoman of the year.
That would have made way more sense if it was horsewoman of the year. Sportswoman of the year was Black Caviar.
That's right.
Horse.
So that's true.
It's, you know, they, well, obviously those two men were very well publicized that year,
but the following year in 1999, Clinton was among 18 included in the list of most widely
admired people of the 20th century.
Wow.
He's fine. He has had, he has so many honorary degrees, accolades, awards.
He has Grammys.
He still makes, he's an idiot.
He makes hundreds of thousands of dollars speaking arrangements.
He's fine.
Wow.
The Clinton Lewinsky scandal was subject to widespread media coverage,
resulting in considerable difficulties for Monica Lewinsky later in life as she attempted
to find employment. Her immunity agreement restricted what she could talk about publicly,
but she was able to cooperate with Andrew Morton in his writing of Monica's story,
her biography which included her side of the Clinton affair. The book was published in
99, the same month as she appeared in Interview interview with Barbara Walters on ABC's show, 2020.
70 million Americans tuned in, which was a record for a new show.
That's amazing.
Well, Lewinsky made about $500,000 from her participation in the book and another million from international rights to Walters' interview,
but was still troubled by high legal bills and living costs.
I don't know why she has lots of legal fees,
but I mean, obviously she would have needed lawyers and stuff to defend herself, but
legal fees comes up for a while, so it must have really accrued a lot of fees.
In September of 99, she released a line of handbags, and at the start of 2000,
she began appearing in television commercials for the diet company Jenny Craig. The $1 million
endorsement deal, which required Lewinsky to lose 40 or more pounds in six
months gained considerable publicity at the time.
The choice of Lewinsky as a role model proved controversial for Jenny Craig and some of
its private franchises switched to an older advertising campaign.
So even people within Jenny Craig are like, nah.
So the company stopped running the Lewinsky ads in February.
They didn't like, why didn't they like it?
Cause she wasn't, her choice, her, the choice of her as a role model was controversial.
Okay.
Because this was all her fault.
She's had sex.
She's had sex.
She's had sex.
That's inappropriate.
Well, like I was saying before, now, I hope this doesn't come across as a double standard, but when there's a relationship
like this between a man and a woman, the man can only resist so much.
And when, and I hope this isn't inflammatory or anything, when a she devil like her, you that everywhere. You know, uses her wiles.
I think.
And I hope this isn't coming across
and in the wrong way, because I am
coming from a feminist point of view here.
It's hard to.
It's hard to feel good about it, isn't it?
But it is funny, but it is hard to feel good about it. Well, it's funny because it's, I mean, at its heart, what I'm sharing is a truth,
you know, a universal truth.
And that and sometimes things are funny because they're true.
But it is true that people do talk like that, which is hectic.
So that was like January of 99.
By February, they've stopped running the ads.
They conclude her campaign entirely by April and they paid her $300,000 instead of the
$1 million contract.
Oh, come on.
You got to pay the money anyway, surely.
Later in 2000, she worked as a correspondent for Channel 5 in the UK on the show Monica's
Postcards reporting on US culture and trends from a variety of locations.
The show was called Monica's Postcards and she wasn't in the post.
How many Monica's hosted this show? And now we're close to another Monica.
That's a good concept for a show that every single presenter has the same name.
Thanks Monica. Hi, I'm Monica. Yeah, that sounds good. That's fun.
Monica of the week.
Yeah.
Now to sum up the weekend's sport, we cross to Monica Salas.
Oh yes.
That's fun stuff.
We'll start from the tennis school.
By 2005, Lewinsky found that she couldn't escape the spotlight in the US, which made
both her professional and personal life very difficult.
She stopped selling a handbag line and moved to London to study social psychology at the London School of Economics. In December of 2006, she graduated
with a masters of science degree. And for the next decade, she sort of tried to avoid
publicity. She re-emerged in 2014, writing an essay for Vanity Fair titled Shame and
Survival. And that same year, she took a public stand against cyber bullying, calling herself
patient zero of online harassment. She has spoken and written about that topic a lot, but it seems like it's a lot harder
for her to shake the scandal than it has been for Bill.
Like she's synonymous with it, but he kind of isn't.
He also played saxophone.
So people remember multiple things about him.
Yeah.
He also had great hair.
And that said, like, you know, she's sort of saying she wants to separate herself from
it, but she was a co-producer on a season of the TV series American Crime Story that
focused on the Clinton Lewinsky scandal in 2019.
I don't know that I made that.
Yeah, it must be a tight spoke.
She's like, I need money.
This is the easiest way for me to make money.
Yeah, yeah.
Am I remembering it?
She's like, this is my story.
I don't want them to fuck it up.
Yeah, that's a very good point too. Yeah.
Is, am I remembering this right? That she was sort of like a star lock on for a bit.
People would get the Monica Lewinsky haircut and stuff.
I think so. Yeah. Yeah.
Get the Rachel or the Monica. That's what people, or it might be confusing something else.
There was another Monica on that show as well.
The Monica show. Yeah, I know. They're all Monica.
It was called the Monica show, Dave.
Does he listen?
I don't know if he does.
Yeah.
So it's, it's, it's very interesting to look at it through a modern lens because you do
go, Oh, he's fine.
He's completely unscathed by this despite being accused of so many horrific things through
his entire political career. And she, she, she fooled around with the president at 22 and it's like to find her entire life.
Yeah, crazy.
And it's still something that every time she does anything, it's like, it's what comes up.
It's what she's known for.
Like if she was on Rove and she probably was at one point, he would have brought it up
before asking who would you have turned gay for?
Asking the good questions.
Yeah.
So yeah, that's kind of a, that's basically a little, for those of us who grew up knowing
the name Monica Lewinsky and knowing the scandal, but not really knowing all that much about
it, that's kind of a bit of an explainer for you.
Yeah. Thanks for the background there. It's kind of fucked about it. That's kind of a bit of an explainer for you. Yeah, thanks for the background there.
It's kind of fucked.
Yeah, it's not a lovely story, is it?
No, no, no, no.
It's not a nice story.
Oh, there you go.
I've just Googled Monica Lewinsky and a couple of days ago she was on Armchair Expert with
Dax Shepard.
So-
Oh, there you go.
She's big on the podcast this week then.
I wonder if it came up.
It would be annoying. What is this? Oh, she was if it came up. It would be annoying.
What is this?
Oh, she was on Call Her Daddy.
25 years later, she'd have to still be talking about that.
Yeah, I know. It would be like, this is this, why is this the thing that defines my entire life?
Yeah, she was on Call Her Daddy earlier this year and that, that it definitely came up
then for sure.
All right.
So it's, yeah.
But now she's sort of known more as an activist. Like the cyber bullying stuff? Yeah. Yeah. Talks about that a lot. I think she did a Ted talk about it. She's got a
production company now. So she got a podcast called Reclaiming. Let's come up here. Cause yeah,
see some of us stuff of us speaking still goes viral. Yeah. Speaking about that element of it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Not just she pronounces words funny.
Oh, she's gone viral again for speaking.
Can you believe this is what she said?
She said apple when she meant apple.
If people could go viral for that, you would be the biggest star of the internet.
I know if there was any justice. Classic women taking all the publicity again.
My goodness.
But there you go.
That is the Clinton Lewinsky scandal.
Thank you.
So good.
What a great report.
Thanks so much for bringing all that to our attention.
You she-devil.
Saying thanks for bringing that to my attention makes it seem like you didn't
listen to a word of it.
I will be sure to action everything you say.
Yes.
The topic that you discussed.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's that kind of, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Very interesting.
I found that eye-opening.
Yeah, really Mike Moore off the old,
Rob Sitch.
Frontline. Oh, yes. Every story would come back. Fascinating stuff. Yeah. He was never listening.
So what we like to do for the final portion of the show is to thank some of our great
supporters. Without them, this show would not exist. If you want to become such a supporter, you can go to patreon.com slash dogo on pod.
And yeah, there's a bunch of different levels. You get different rewards depending on the
level you get onto, including four bonus episodes a month, including the whole back catalogue
of 250 plus episodes. We've got all sorts of stuff. We do a movie podcast. We do a D&D
campaign. We do mini reports. We do little quizzes, all sorts of stuff. You also are the first to know
about upcoming tours and live shows, including presales and discounted tickets, like our 500th,
which probably just happened when you're hearing this.
Yeah, the majority of those.
It was great and we had a great time.
We had the best time.
And nobody shat themselves.
And if you've heard that on social media, that's a lie.
Don't worry.
Just turned a dress inside out.
Oh, that made it worse.
Worse for everyone else.
Better for me.
Better for me.
Care for a bit of distance. You get access to the nicest corner of the internet, the Facebook group. Worse for everyone else. Better for me. Better for me.
Care for a bit of distance.
You get access to the nicest corner of the internet, the Facebook group, which has just
launched a new hat swap or the first hat swap.
Sophie Tudor, one of our great patrons, sets up these swaps.
She's done snack swaps and all these different things in the past.
At the moment, she's running a hat swap.
All around the world.
So you say you're in Botswana.
You got a hat, you send it to Belgium
and they send one back.
Pretty cool.
Do some others.
Okay, say you're in Namibia.
Yes.
And then you've got a friend who lives-
In Guam.
In Guam.
You'll send a hat to Guam
and Guam will send one to Namibia.
Wow.
So good.
And the other, if you're on the Sydney Schoenberg level or above, you get to be in that fact
quote or question section of the show, which is this section actually.
And actually now that I think about it, I think it has a jingle that goes something
like this.
Fact quote or question.
Ding.
You always remember the ding.
She always remembers the same.
I hurt my neck doing this. Fact, quote or question. You always remember the ding. I hurt my neck doing that.
Yeah, that was a wild neck cock. It actually really hurt because I'm 34. You just can't move
suddenly. You gotta warm up for everything. So I'm reading out three this week and in this section
I get to give the fact or quote a question or a brag or a suggestion
or really whatever you like.
Then I'll read them out for the first time.
You also get to get for the first time on the pod.
I don't pre-read these.
I respect them all too much.
That's for cowards to pre-read.
Yes.
You also get to give yourself a title.
And first up this week, we've got Bob McBob- McBobbity Bobbington, whose title is recently unemployed,
writing quote, ah, this is a quote, give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set
fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life.
That's nice.
That's a quote from Solid Jackson.
I'm not familiar with Solid Jackson's work, Dave.
No, I'm not sure. I'm going to look up Solid Jackson. I'm not familiar with Solid Jackson's work, Dave. No, I'm not sure.
I'm gonna look up Solid Jackson for you.
And Bob gives a little context maybe here,
writing, a great saying to live by,
but people apparently don't,
but people apparently don't like you actually following it.
Do you happen to know anywhere in need of a king,
by the way?
I seem to be between positions right now.
Anyway, must run quite
quickly actually. Toodle-loo and pip pip. Pip pip. Thank you so much, Bob. Next one comes from
Richard Ashton Smith, aka Master Thief. With a brag writing, hey you lovely bunch,
a while back my partner and I saw you live in London, the Pez episode.
We, has that episode ever gone out?
No.
Okay, it'll go out one day.
It should.
It was a good episode.
Yeah.
We're still just waiting for the lawyers to tell us all the edits that need to be made.
Yeah.
I was pretty slanderous.
And I just was saying, I was referencing things that hadn't happened, were really old, but
not old enough to be interesting again.
Yeah. So we're going to edit them out as well. Um, going to say,
we bought a bunch of merch and it was,
and all was good until we got home and realized the card payment never went
through. That's right. We robbed you.
Oh, what? We had become the master thieves.
Unfortunately we enjoy the pod so much. We haven't slept a night since.
So now we have vowed to pay back our terrible, terrible debt through Patreon support. They actually,
this rings a bell, they messaged me asking how to send money across. I'm like, oh, why
don't you just sign up on the Sydney Schoenberg level and you can, you can, you can apologize in person.
You can apologize in person.
That's good stuff, because now we've got them.
So once you're on that level, we know where you live.
Why the fuck would you give it up?
Because it's the best.
Yeah, that's right.
That's how we hook people in.
Oh, bonus episodes.
Once you've got those, why would you want to live in a world where you don't have them?
Wish only the good life.
They're going to pay tenfold for that merch that was obviously my fault if the payment
didn't go through.
They finished by saying, love the pod, good work, can't wait to see you see the next live
show.
We won't nick any merch, promise.
Probably.
Oh, they've got a taste for it now.
I like that.
Yeah, that's good stuff.
What a thrill to steal from us.
Thrill to steal.
That's very honest and we appreciate you.
Thank you.
Maybe see you in September. I'm going to announce something soon, I think. And then finally, Stephen Edmonds.
Okay. Suffer of factoids. Oh, you can get a cream for that. Writing fact. Situated at
the western end of Collins Street in Melbourne is the Rialto building. Oh my God. Here we
go. Here we go.
You got Matt's attention.
Now I'm fine. The first time in this episode, I'm listening.
Yeah. And I'm talking as well.
The building extends to Flinders Lane, where the facade
incorporates a five story corrugated iron urinal enclosure.
Oh my God. This is good stuff. Five stories?
What does that mean?
I got a urinal to be five stories, this is incredible.
The original building plan included earth closet toilets on the roof of the building,
but later plans show these urinals as a novel solution to the provision of sanitation in
a multi-story building.
These are interesting facts.
Steven Edmonds.
Thank you so much.
I hope you get that cram. That's by my mind. Thank you so much, Steven Edmonds. Thank you so much. I hope you get that cram.
That's by my mind.
Thank you so much, Steven.
Steven came to my show twice during the comedy festival and...
Would have been disappointed the second time.
He was there with Sophie Waldron.
No, he came first on last night. Changed a lot.
That's nice. That does change.
And it got good.
Sophie Waldron said, he's a fake fan. He didn't go to Dave's show. This was on the opening it got good. Sophie Waldron said he's a fake fan.
He didn't go to Dave's show.
This was on the opening night of mine.
What the hell, Stephen?
When he came second night to mine, I'm like, you love me twice as much as Dave.
And he said, well, I actually got here halfway through.
So only one and a half times.
Bit of fun that was had. Bit of fun.
And mathematically, that doesn't really work because one and a half times zero is still zero.
Anyway, thank you so much to Stephen, Richard and Bob.
And just a quick update.
Solid Jackson appears to be a character from the Discworld series, the
Tirol Pratchett character, which a lot of our listeners are big fans of.
I've read a couple of Pratchett books.
Bit of fun.
Great.
Um, I did an episode on, uh, one of them on Primates cause the
librarian is an orangutan.
Beautiful. Have you done one? Have you done one on Bookcheat?
No, I haven't. No, but I know people love it because I get so many requests.
When you do, can I, I mean, I'm on every other episode anyway. Can I be on that one?
I'll think about it. I'm busy.
I'm having deja vu. Me begging and you're like, please don't.
I'm OK.
Jess, what are you doing tomorrow?
I'm dead.
Dave, can I please come on?
Tomorrow just got cancelled.
Jess, still come tomorrow.
You want it too bad.
Yeah, I want it.
I want it real bad.
Now, the next thing we'd like to do is
shout out to a few of our other great
supporters. Jess, do you want to play is shout out to a few of our other great, um, supporters.
Justin, where's the game based on the topic of the day?
I was thinking of, um, cause you know, like Watergate, Troopergate, I was thinking of
like, let's come up with some sort of gate scandal for them.
I like it.
That's really good.
That's probably better than mine.
I was going to be like, why, why don't we, um, we, we assume that they've done something bad in the Oval Office and
we have to create a diversion.
Oh yeah, that's pretty good.
But I like yours better.
Where did you think he was going with that?
Oh, you never know with him, that's the thing.
I thought it was going to be something like, what's their blue dress?
Yeah, what if they get come on?
Yeah, that's what I was thinking.
All right, well, do you want to do the gates, Bob?
And me and Dave will do the addresses and names?
Yep.
All right, Dave, you want address or names?
I'll take names.
I did address last week.
All right.
First up from, ooh.
You don't have to justify it.
Address unknown, I can only assume from deep within the fortress of the moles.
It's Venner or Veena, V-E-N-A.
Surname, probably H based on the email address.
Cheese gate.
Cheese gate.
OK.
Oh, why they eat too much and embarrassing a note.
A whole block.
Subjudice, I'm not actually saying what's before the court.
This is below judice.
I can't go.
Yeah, I think maybe like Andy Matthews eats a block of cheese like an apple.
What?
Picks it up like a hand fruit.
Yeah, yeah.
Just takes a big bite.
Yeah.
He's a weird guy.
Shout out if you're listening.
This is the second time, is this the second week in a row with you?
Yeah, I was like, we bring him up most weeks.
Andy Slander.
And I'm waiting for him to message me and say, Jess, what's going on?
Oh, actually, that's a good point.
Maybe he's dropped off.
Maybe he's not listening.
He still messaged me about who knew it, though.
You don't eat cheese just like an apple.
You fucking psychopath.
I'm here for it.
Yeah, you would be.
I love cheese.
You're a little freak, too.
It really depends on what it is.
If it's like maybe a wheel of brie, I can get that.
But if someone said you can have a barter this apple or a barter this cheese, I'm picking
the cheese 10 times out of 10.
I'd like a barter of each, please, depending on the cheese. I'd like a bite of each, please. Depending on the cheese.
I'd like a slice of each together.
Oh, yeah. Now we're talking.
That's what I actually want.
Okay. Well, all right.
I didn't know that was an option, even though I can't answer the question.
Well, too bad you've locked it in.
Damn it.
I think so much Vina.
Okay.
Cheers, gate. Cheers, gate.
Cheese, gate.
Next up, I'd love to thank from View Bank here in Victoria.
It's L. Taylor. Pie gate. Oh, I'm listening. View from View Bank here in Victoria. It's L Taylor.
Pie Gate.
Oh, I'm listening.
View Bank. Where's View Bank?
It involves you.
I reckon, I don't know where View Bank is.
I think it's a suburb in Melbourne though.
That's right. That's Broden Kelly territory.
But I bet you that there's a bakery there that has a sign out the front saying
best pie in Australia.
And I reckon that's what the Pie Gate was surrounding.
That scandal. Thank
you so much to Elle. Next up, I'd love to thank from Dixon, Kentucky. It's Justin Graham
or Justin Graham. Wipe gate. So, window wiper. Wipe gate. Yes, I'm looking around the room.
I've got this little used wipe here that's filled some juice before. I'm looking around the room. They have a little used wipe here.
I was looking at the packet, to be fair.
I think this is like someone put a flyer under the windscreen wiper.
Yeah. And and and Justin came and screwed it up, chucked it out.
I don't want that.
But unfortunately, underneath that was a parking fine,
which he also chucked out,
which led to quite a scandal to say the least.
To say the least.
Thank you so much to Justin.
From Phoenix, Arizona.
Thank you too.
Say hi to Charles Barkley for us.
Hello, Charles Barkley.
Christina Pham.
Giraffe gate.
Giraffe gate, hey.
Not just looking around the room now, am I? No. She. Giraffe Gate. Hey.
Not just looking around the room now, am I?
No.
She's using her imagination thinking of an animal.
When we're in the Christina Club, we're all Christina Fam.
Yeah, Giraffe Gate.
What happened there?
She painted a llama brown and gold and charged little kiddies $5 to go to see the giraffe at her backyard
zoo and yeah, I fooled a couple of them, but eventually-
Couple of the young ones.
Yeah.
Stupid kids.
Kids are dumb.
But yeah, but once people figured it out, it created quite a havoc.
Created quite a havoc.
Created quite a havoc. Created quite a havoc.
You know, that phrase people say.
Havoc is the name of my dog's biological father.
Oh my god.
Really?
That's a wild name for a dog.
Just yesterday, I'm at Walken Humphrey, who is a groodle, and another groodle
approaches and the lady says, oh, he's got a little white paw.
Our dog used to have that, but it's faded away.
And she goes, where'd you get him from?
It was Humphrey's half sister. Fuck off.
Can you believe it?
Whoa.
And you're-
Same mother.
That is crazy.
And you're on the set of Jerry Springer at the time, aren't you?
You are this dog's mother.
Can I touch Steve's head?
Can I touch Steve's head? From Chicago, the Windy City, second city in Illinois in the US.
Thank you to Steven Gonzalez.
Incredible name.
Steven Gonzalez, of course.
Jess is going deep into the mind palaces.
She's close to us, so she can't literally can't look around the room.
But she's looking, you look up to remember she's looking down, which means she's trying
to forget.
Pina coladas.
Is that right?
Is that the song where they go some dance to remember something?
Pina colada gate.
I wonder where she gets her ideas from.
I'm listening again.
Is that the lyrics from that song?
What?
Like if you like Pina colada?
Yeah.
Do they know some dance to remember?
Some dance to forget.
No, it's Eagles.
I think it's Hotel California. Oh yes. Very similar songs. Very similar songs. If you like Pina Colada. Yeah. Do they know some remember some different?
No, it's Eagles. I think it's Hotel California.
Oh, yes. Very similar songs.
Very similar. Both absolute classics.
They go a little too long.
Steven Gonzalez, Pina Colada gate.
Pina Colada gate. Oh, my gosh.
That one that one did involve some murder.
Yeah. So let's be let's be gentle with how we talk about this.
Yeah. The only clue left of the scene was a half-gunken pinacolada
That's right, and they found they've they found Stephen to be guilty when he pissed pineapple II the next day
Is this piss pineapple II? Yeah
Is this piss pineapple II to you is this pissing this in a submissive?
Yes visible in a visible in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a- in a-gate. We talking like the big oil company or a little shell?
Both.
Oh my god.
This little shell goes all the way to the top.
Oh my god.
Okay.
I can't say much.
Is it about how they forgot to change the batteries in the shells years ago and now shells
are just these sort of dormant looking things when they used to fly around,
chirp and about. Oh my God.
And this goes all the way to the top of shell.
All the way to the top of shell.
Oh my God. This is big.
It's crazy.
That's real big.
SK Taylor. Can't wait to hear you try and talk your way out of this one.
I can't wait to read your tell-all book.
From here in Franks and South Victoria, it's Mitchell Watts.
And Mitchell Watts is famous.
Obviously for being part of Hatgate. Oh, Hatgate. Yeah. Yeah. He was the guy who sold the emperor a hat. And obviously there was, yeah, the emperor
took him out as well as other haberdasherers from around the town who sold him all sorts of clothes that weren't in fact clothes at all.
Yeah, they were just sort of like rags and stuff.
Whoa.
What are clothes if not rags?
That's a great point.
And that's exactly what Bill Clinton said in court.
Depends on what your definition of clothes. Second to last now from Van Wert Ohio, God's country itself.
Gads country.
Gads country.
It's Curtis Radabao.
Gate, gate.
Gate, gate, fantastic.
Gate, gate, which do you remember?
They got to shut the gate and all the sheep got out.
Curtis, when will you learn?
Come on.
Do people call you Rad?
What a great surname, Radabao. Do people call you Rad? What is great surname Rad about?
Do you remember when I did the presidential incidents and I talked about a few of the
live episode last year?
Absolutely.
And I talked about there's not one but two gate gates.
Is this the third gate?
This is the third gate gate.
Wow.
Can't believe it.
The least serious of the three.
Yeah, but those sheep are going to be hard to get back in.
Yeah, because they don't have good recall sheep.
No.
They're all following the leader.
The least serious.
Remember one guy was late for soccer training and he was a professional athlete and he said
that the gate had broken down and the power went out and he couldn't come to the soccer
training and then his coach came around, it was like 60 centimeters tall.
You could just jump.
He needed to think of a better lie.
Love it.
But this is even if you need a reason, like if you needed an easy lie, just say diarrhea.
Nobody questions diarrhea.
No period pain.
That coach is coming around.
You probably, I don't think you could.
You could say cramps.
I guess you should.
Keep it Vega.
Yeah.
Cramps. I had cramps., I guess. Yeah, Kevin Vega. Yeah. Cramps.
I had cramps.
And diarrhea.
Say it looking like this.
Cramps.
Cramps, because this is my most believable face.
Go on, accuse me of something.
Matt, what the fuck, dude?
We're supposed to start at 11 and it's 11.45.
Where have you been?
Cramping.
Okay.
I've got cramps.
Okay, I'm very sorry to hear that.
Do you need a heat pack?
Yes. Good answer. Okay. I'm very sorry to hear that. Do you need a heat pack? Yes.
Good answer.
Okay.
Is that right?
Yep.
Always accept the heat pack.
He fell for it.
Heat packs make it worse.
If he really cramped, like that could have been the case.
And finally from, oh, once again from address unknown.
Oh, am I to assume that this person is also from the fortress of the moles.
Huh?
Wow.
Dave, don't yawn.
We got feedback when you yawned last time.
Did I?
That yawn rang around the world.
I don't remember that.
Everyone, I mean, I saw three or four messages saying, I yawned. Was this recently?
Yeah.
I've been in a bonus.
Well, I mean, you were yawning at the time, Dave.
Don't do it.
What's wrong with you?
People are driving off the road right now.
Oh my God, sorry, I didn't want to kill anyone.
Say the last name for fuck's sake.
Thank you to Lata Chary.
Lata Chary.
Beardgate.
Oh yeah.
So Lata was living in my beard for weeks.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Iata Shari. Beard gate. Oh yeah.
So Lata was living in my beard for weeks.
And I didn't know.
And they did not pay rent.
Not at all?
Not.
Rent free?
Not at all.
They were living rent free in my beard.
That's ridiculous.
Yeah.
Ah, but I forgive you Lata.
Thanks so much to Lata Curtis, Mitchell, SK,
Stephen, Christina, Justin, Elle, and Vena.
And the last thing we need to do is welcome in
some people into the Triptych Club,
which Dave explains so well, I think.
This is our basically hall of fame
for people that have been supporting this show
on the shout out level or above for three consecutive years.
They've already had a shout out previously,
but now we are going to welcome them into our clubhouse, our hangout zone where you and maybe a thousand other members
that have so far gone in can never leave, but why would you want to?
Because we provide the full package, drinks, dinner, entertainment, places to sleep and
places for you time.
Yeah.
Do with that what you will. Places to sleep and places for you time. Yeah. Do with that what you will.
Places to come.
Jess, you're so, I mean, this is the center of mind.
I'm standing at the door, about to lift a velvet rope, read out five names this week
and you head on in.
David's going to hype you up.
He's MCing the show.
He's also booked a band for the after party. Jess has worked on a drink based on, oh my God, this could be tasty.
What have you whipped up this week based on today's topic?
Well, I'm trying to, I've got the dress and I'm trying to extract as much as I can, but I'm-
You've got the original dress?
I've got the original dress.
Does someone own that now?
I imagine that's something that people would bid big money for.
It'd be in a museum somewhere, surely.
That's fucked.
No, surely it's surely not.
No, I've just got a red, white and blue cocktail, baby.
God bless your cocktail.
That was a really nice salute.
Mr. President.
Oh, you should call it Mr. President.
It's called, sorry, I'm late, Mr. President.
And it takes 15 minutes once you've ordered it.
It's not that it takes me that long to make it. It's that I wait 15 minutes and then I give it to you. And
then I say, sorry, this is late Mr. President. And you always do one with them as well. Of
course. I'm incredibly drunk. And Dave, you booked a band? Yes. Last week I think you
booked Mr. President. You're never going to believe I booked Mr. President. When you read
out the title of this episode, what are talking about because I've been in negotiations with this artist for nine months
I've just looked at the emails and they've just come through as you start the episode. It's Monica. Oh
We got Monica. The boy is mine. Wow
The boy is mine
This is a song we know or not?
Yeah, that's a big one.
Is that the- That's a big one.
Is that a Michael Jackson song or something?
No, that's The Girl is Mine, I guess.
Is it? Does he have a song something like that?
I'm giving you a blank expression.
Come on, this is a big song.
It's had how many?
It's had 300 million plays on Spotify.
300 million.
Yeah. I recognize the title of the boy's mom, but I can't think of how it goes.
You'll know it.
And we'll get in trouble if we play it.
Yeah, that's why.
No, I'm thinking of sorry.
I've looked up Michael Jackson, the boy's mom and it says that's the opposite.
Already said he said, uh, it's not his son. Oh, I see. He's sort
of like he really Michael Jackson, that whole song was really like Bill Clintoning it wasn't
it? Yeah. I don't even know this woman. I've never even met Billy Jean or that woman as
I'd call her. Not my lover. She's just an intern.
Thinks that I'm the one. The boy is not my son.
I just looked up in 2015, the Las Vegas Erotic Heritage Museum offered Lewinsky
one million dollars for the dress. She didn't take the offer.
That's probably a good call, I think. Yeah.
Yeah. Maybe she's going to clone another bill.
Do you think the technology is there yet? Not quite.
No, that's what she's waiting.
It's cryogenically frozen.
Comes out and he's half man, half dress.
Oh no, some of the threads intertwined with the DNA.
All right, so we've got five inductees.
Hang around four, of course, Monica.
The boy is mine.
The boy is mine.
I was thinking, get out right now.
But that's Jojo.
Yeah, bugger.
The end of you and me.
All right.
That has nothing to do with the boy being mine.
We'll edit this out, but I'll play it.
And then you can sing it.
And then you just say what you recognise.
Oh, then I'll sing it.
Okay. All right. And we're back from listening to Monica's The Boy Is Mine and-
You say, maybe?
It started with, The Boy Is Mine, boy, my, my, my.
Yeah, he loves that bit.
But yeah, she had a lot of hits in America.
That was number one, the first night, Angel of Mine.
But The Boy Is Mine did chart at number three in Australia in 1998.
Appropriate year, too, Dave.
Wow.
Yeah, that's another coincidence.
Wow.
Angel of Mine was another hit.
She loves mine.
But she's a lot bigger in America.
The boy is mine.
The angel is mine.
Yeah.
A bit possessive. Come on. mine. The angel is mine. Yeah. Bit possessive.
Come on.
All eyes on me is another one.
All right.
All eyes on me.
Settle down.
All right.
So, here we go.
Okay.
Five names.
Dave, you ready to hop up?
Jess, you ready to hold Dave?
My hand is on the tush.
Thank you.
Here we go.
First up from London in Great Britain. It's Abel Bracegirdle.
I'm willing and Abel to welcome in Abel Bracegirdle.
Oh, that's good.
Welcome in Abel.
Next up from, ooh.
Dave already did that.
He already welcomed Abel in.
Just keep the flow going for fuck's sake.
What the hell, man?
Broke the flow.
Jesus Christ, you're so insufferable.
Next, I'm so sorry. Next up from Address Unknown. This is why they don't let me inside the flow. Jesus Christ, you're so insufferable. Next, I'm so sorry.
Next up from address unknown.
This is why they don't let me inside the building.
I can only show from deep within the fortress of moles.
Welcome in Patrick J. Ryan.
I like magic, but I prefer Patrick J. Ryan.
Oh, that is nice.
From, I want to say air in South Ayrshire in Great Britain, it's Norman River.
I'll be storming down that river with Norman River.
We storming down that river.
From Perth in Western Australia, welcome in Celeste Hadjiali.
Celeste is best. We can all agree.
Woo!
That's a great name. And finally, sorry for doing that again.
From, finally, Denver, Colorado, it's Evan Waterman. We've got a new doing that again from finally Denver, Colorado.
It's Evan Waterman.
We've got a new best Evan. It's Evan Waterman.
Evan Waterman.
Welcome in Evan, Celeste, Norman, Patrick and Abel.
Just make yourselves at home.
Grab a red, white and blue, Mr.
President, obviously get in 15 minutes ahead of when you want to actually drink it and get ready to hear the musical stylings of Monica.
Enjoy that song that we maybe know.
Bob, I bring us in an episode.
Is there anything we need to tell people before we go?
Dave and I just want to apologise for Matt and his presence and existence.
Oh, for Matt, not to Matt.
No, for. We apologise to the listeners that he exists.
Oh my God.
It irks us as well, but there's not much we can do about it.
I'm sorry, I didn't realize it was that bad.
So thank you so much for joining us.
If you want to find the show on social media,
it's dugo on Posh.
He's looking all sad and now I got the giggles.
This might be my last appearance,
but it's been really nice being here on the show, I guess.
We're literally about to record another episode
immediately after this, so.
Will I be on it?
We'll find out next week.
We'll find out.
I think you will be.
So if you want to find us on social media,
it's dogo on pod, dogo on podcast on TikTok.
Our website is dogoonpod.com.
If you feel bad for me,
follow me at Matt's Short Comedy on Instagram.
If you think his little sad boy act is a bit pathetic, unfollow him on Instagram and make
sure you're following at Jess Perkins.
Unfollow Jess if you think she's being real chunky.
Okay.
And if you think that was gross, unfollow Matt.
I had to call back to a couple of weeks ago for context to go back there.
Or AJ added.
Dave, boot this baby home.
We will be back next week and I'm sure we'll all be here.
But until then, thank you so much for listening.
And till then, goodbye.
Later.
That surprised me as well.
Later.
Don't forget to sign up to our tour mailing list so we know where in the world Ahem. Later. to our Instagram, click our link tree. Very, very easy. It means we know to come to you and you also know that we're coming to you.
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