Do Go On - 520 - The Surprisingly Interesting History of Ketchup

Episode Date: October 8, 2025

Ketchup - it's America's favourite condiment and close cousin of Australia's tomato sauce, but its history goes back a long long way! Join us as we discuss the eighth most voted for topic this BLOCK, ...the surprisingly interesting history of ketchup!This is a comedy/history podcast, the report begins at approximately 06:07 (though as always, we go off on tangents throughout the report).For all our important links: https://linktr.ee/dogoonpod Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/Who Knew It with Matt Stewart: https://play.acast.com/s/who-knew-it-with-matt-stewart/Our awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader ThomasDo Go On acknowledges the traditional owners of the land we record on, the Wurundjeri people, in the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders, past and present. REFERENCES AND FURTHER READING: Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Big news about our 2025 world tour. Slash Australian New Zealand tour. That's the world, baby. That's our oyster. We have sold out a bunch of the shows. And if you've missed out in Perth or Brisbane, fear not, we've added some extra shows. So you can go to our website.
Starting point is 00:00:18 Do go onpod.com. And soon we'll be in Hobart, Canber, Sydney, Adelaide, Perth, Auckland, Wellington and Brisbane. Can't wait. Hello and welcome to another episode of Do Go On. My name is Dave Orniki and as always, I'm here with Jess Perkins and Matt Stewart. Hello, hello, hello. It feels like Block has finally properly started because we're all together again.
Starting point is 00:00:58 I saw someone mention recently they don't like episodes when any guests are on. Oh, that's nice. So they'll like this one. Yes. And I'm with them. Oh, they also said they don't like live episodes. And they also said they didn't like any other episodes. They just don't like us.
Starting point is 00:01:15 Yeah, that's fair. It was a really long-winded way and saying quite a cruel way. Yeah. Because I'm like, well, at least they still like, and then they knock that off. Yeah, you think the majority you left. And then they still... Okay. But do they like block...
Starting point is 00:01:28 episodes, surely. How can you not? How can you not? How can you not? How can you not? How can you not? The most magical time of year. Is that correct? It is. What is the time of you, Dave? It's blockbuster-slash-belovember, a time where we celebrate the big topics. That's right. So we've collated them from the topics that are the most suggested in the hat slash the most popular ones voted for in specific polls by our Patrons. I put them all together. So it's like 150 something topics, a shorter list this year. That's the short list, believe us.
Starting point is 00:02:04 And then that's opened up to anyone can vote, and we've had thousands of voters, and now we're counting down the top nine topics in there. And this is the eighth top topic. Huge. We're into the top eight already. We're into the top eight already in the top eight. Oh, it comes around faster every year.
Starting point is 00:02:21 Yeah. Top eight. Top eight. And I'm doing the report this week, and we always get on to the topic with a question. Obviously, the topics can be anything at all, but this time of year, they're really big topics. They're huge. We're talking. What are we talking?
Starting point is 00:02:36 Watergate. O.J. Simpson. Oh, my God. The Black Dahlia Murder. Yeah. Big bad topics. The clown killer. FJK.
Starting point is 00:02:50 Was that his name? BTK? No, that was a different one. Which K? The president. What was the president's name? Oh, I see. J.F.K.
Starting point is 00:02:58 J.F.K. Remember you did that double part of a book? Two part. Anyway, so it's topics on that level. Yeah. So we've all heard of that are just massive. That's right. So I'm probably about five hours worth.
Starting point is 00:03:11 I'll note I didn't say any topics because I've forgotten them all. But there's always a few. that are thrown up that are surprising as well. They go, oh, that was, over a quarter of people wanted to hear this. Often the winner, like we've done a couple of the Who Wants to Be a Millionaire Coffing Scanner? Yes. A great topic.
Starting point is 00:03:27 But that's number one. The Oxford Dictionary. Yeah, number one. From A to Ant. Don't get me going. That broke day. They put out from A to Anne after like seven years. I thought you were going to throw up you were laughing so hard.
Starting point is 00:03:39 I thought I was going to throw up too. Great memories. But let's make some new memories now. Okay. Is that you telling us that this one's a bit? bit of a surprising one. I was surprised by it. The question is, and I mean, you, I mean, we've already divvied up the topic. So you've heard of this topic, but let's see if you remember, hands on buzzes. Okay. What do Americans call tomato sauce? Is it catsup?
Starting point is 00:04:08 That's not a bad, not bad, Jess. If it's not catsp, I'm guessing, is it ketchup? It is ketchup. Will you go into the difference between ketchup and catsup? Just because of that Simpsons joke, ketchup? I will. Katsip. Oh, great. Ketchup. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:21 Well, you go into the difference between tomato sauce and ketchup. I do. Great. Because they're different. I only just found that out this week. Yeah, they're different. Because we are talking about, we should say the title of the topic is. Oh, well, the title of the topic, as it was suggested, was something like the surprisingly
Starting point is 00:04:37 interesting history of tomato ketchup. Wow. Wait, actually, take out the tomato. Just ketchup. Just ketchup. Shut up ketchup. But I mean, Dave did an episode. about the history of the saxophone, and I went, what the fuck are you doing?
Starting point is 00:04:51 And it was great. I really love origin stories like this. I really enjoyed talking about diamond engagement rings and why babies allocated blue and pink as colors. Yeah, that was fascinating. I want to thank you for doing the Diamond episode many years before I got married, because you saved me a lot of money. Yeah, it's such a mainstream scam that everyone, you just sort of accept. And that three-month salary rule, rule, it's so weird. A complete bullshit.
Starting point is 00:05:27 It's made up by the company to make you spend more money. It's insane. It's like, of course. Don't spend three months of your salary on a ring. That's insane. Come on. Sorry if you've already done that. Now, I'm not.
Starting point is 00:05:42 You're a sucker. Wake up, sheeple, is what I have to say. This was suggested. just by two people. Yumo Nato from London and Scum Pig from Denver, Colorado. Thank you, Scum Pig.
Starting point is 00:05:54 Thank you, Umo and Scum Pig. Thank you, Skum Pig and Umo. Yumi suggested into the hat, whereas Scum Pig, it's a patron who put it into the specific block pole which got a lot of likes, which is what... Because you might be like, hang on, isn't this the most suggested topics?
Starting point is 00:06:12 Yeah. And it's only two suggested. But this one was... Scum Pig built up a lot of following, a lot of support inside the patron. Sometimes there is a bit of, you know, people campaigning. Good for you, Scum Pig. And to be honest, Scum Pig just said it was a surprisingly interesting history. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:29 That was all the campaign required. That's a great sell. And Jess has already alluded to it. But yeah, I should say before we get started, the Australian tomato sauce, New Zealand has a similar tomato sauce, and American tomato ketchup aren't the same. And I only found out this while researching the topic. Dare I say, ketchup is better.
Starting point is 00:06:50 Really? Interesting. I think it's a bit spicier. Not spicy is wrong, but like it's got a bit more flavor to it. Interesting. I thought you were a patriot. Can't believe you just said that. I would like to say, if I can be real, this is going to be controversial.
Starting point is 00:07:10 They're very similar. Very similar. Okay. Is that because you've come out and you've done the taste test as part of the research. Of course. You must. And they're, you know, they're sugary, red, squirty, liquidy squirters.
Starting point is 00:07:24 Yeah. This is how celebrity food critic Matt Preston, Matt with a cravat. Matt Carvat. This is how he breaks it down. ketchup is thicker and sweeter. Sauce is more vinegory. That's what I meant by spicy vinegar. Sauce is more vinegar and thinner.
Starting point is 00:07:44 And ketchup is thicker. thicker and sweeter. Right. When you think of thick, you think flavor. That's right. I'm all about texture. Yeah. This thick shake, spicy.
Starting point is 00:07:56 Anyway, whatever the case, as you'll soon hear, they have way more in common with each other than they do with the original ketchup. Oh. Interesting. Yes. I'm going to guess it was more like a chutney. Oh. You love it.
Starting point is 00:08:10 Or a relish. It was just a full tomato. Have a bite of this. Catch it. You want some on your chips? Put this on your fries. Just squeezing a tomato. Yark.
Starting point is 00:08:23 Or yum. Probably yark. Okay. Well, just double checking. So, yeah, either way, very, very popular condiment. A 2011 survey by Fountain Sauce, one of the big Australian tomato sauce brands, found that 80% of Aussie households said they used tomato sauce on a meal at least once a week. and Vittoria Traverso for popular science writes
Starting point is 00:08:48 that it is estimated that 97% of US households consume ketchup with the average American ingesting roughly three bottles of the sauce each year. Wow. That seems like a lot, doesn't it? How often would you have tomato sauce? Because you, as a pie guy. Yeah, pie guy, I'm having it every week.
Starting point is 00:09:03 Meat pies. Yep. Every week because of a pie. Do you have a pie every week? Yeah. And I often have a pie. You never get the photos of this one on the Instagram. Often I'll have a pie.
Starting point is 00:09:13 pie, like a frozen pie with mash and mushy peas. You'll cook the pie. When you say a frozen, when you say a frozen pie. Just want to double-take. You put that in the oven first, right? Oh, yes, yes, yes, for about 50 minutes. We've got the timing down, Pat. That's what it says on the box.
Starting point is 00:09:33 What are you doing? We're talking, herberts? I love a herbert. That's a premium. I love their. Let's do a good veggie pasta. Really great veggie parsley. And a good size.
Starting point is 00:09:41 Yeah, I like it. Because sometimes the pasties are teeny tiny. I love their beef and cammin bear. Oh, that sounds very fancy. Cheezy on top. Very nice. Yes, but I'm always having tomato sauce on that at least once a week. How about you guys?
Starting point is 00:09:56 Are you once a week? Would you be part of that? That's what I'm thinking. Growing up, definitely, and I realize it's because, I mean, I'm vegetarian now, but there were signs. I didn't like meat as a child, so it was basically a vessel for sauce. Anything meat was covered in sauce just for me to tolerate it But now, maybe not every week
Starting point is 00:10:18 Yeah, not enough meals that require sauce I think I'd probably lessen every week now Yeah Depending on the, yeah, depending on the time of you Comedy Festival, I'm eating a lot more pasties from convenience stores Yeah, 711 pasties Yeah, they're pretty good
Starting point is 00:10:32 Yeah, they're good, yeah Reliable Veggie pasties Pretty good Or the spinach and ricotta rolls. That was a big sausage roll kid. Yes, same.
Starting point is 00:10:43 And again, that was a lot of sauce. I think I just really like puff pastry. Pastry and sauce, great combo. So good. And a log of meat. A log of unknown meat. Yes, and delightfully dry on either end. Yeah, it's always so dry.
Starting point is 00:10:59 That first bite you need to drown in sauce. Yes. What is this? When we're in Hobart recently, I went to a banjos, which I think we do have in Victoria, but they're not as common. Especially in the city, yeah. All good, yeah. They're not as good as Baker's Delight, I'd say.
Starting point is 00:11:14 They're probably owned by the same people, I imagine. But I had a veggie roll, like a little mini sausage roll that was just, it was like a pasty, but in roll form. Really, really dry ends. Still covered in sauce. Yeah, I found them to be a little dry. But maybe, you know, I only tried once. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:32 So maybe I just got a dud banjos. Maybe. It's possible. I also went to banjos and I got not one but two pies. Yeah. And including their head, it was a pulled beef brisket with jalapinos. And I ordered that. And I go, just so you know, I've said, can I have the brisket with jalapinas?
Starting point is 00:11:47 And he goes, just so you know, this has jalapeno. And I was like, okay, thanks. Thank you for telling me. I'm going to change my order now. And then I did have the first bite and went, oh, that's quite hot. Yeah. Yes, it is very popular. Source and chaos.
Starting point is 00:12:01 I think it's even more popular for kids. I had a berry and my, uh, Tane, uh, heritage will roll over in their graves right now but last night after finishing this report i made a quick uh bowl of pasta spaghetti and just squeezed on uh some tomato sauce wow you didn't nothing else oh and well this is this was a recipe taught to me by my uncle john a recipe i love this a lot of tomato sauce yep a lot of ground pepper and a little bit of salt mix it up good to go okay no cheese well i i had cheese i don't think that I was in the original John recipe, so just in case John was listening. John would be rolling over in this grave.
Starting point is 00:12:42 The first thing I should probably mention, even though I've already mentioned things, is that tomato ketchup isn't the only kind of ketchup. It sort of has become synonymous, right? You say ketchup, you assume tomato ketchup. Yeah. But, yeah, ketchup is defined by Miriam Webster as a seasoned puree condiment, usually made from tomatoes. But the original makers of ketchup would not.
Starting point is 00:13:07 never have even heard of tomatoes. They wouldn't have known what they were. Oh, my goodness. Tomatoes, what the frick are you talking about, they would have said? They're from a PT. What the heck? Yeah. They were in a PTW.
Starting point is 00:13:20 W for World. That's not a W I want to live in. Get me out of this W. Ketchup's origins can be traced way back many centuries to China. Really? According to Stephanie Butler writing for history. com, as far back as 300 BC, texts began documenting the use of fermented paste
Starting point is 00:13:41 made from fish entrails, meat byproducts, and soybeans called Geithkup or Cochup. By speakers of the southern Min dialect, the fish sauce was easy to store on long ocean voyages. That's right, this delicious sauce
Starting point is 00:13:57 was popularized by seaman. For Atlas Obscura, And Eubank writes, Kichyap means basically seafood pickle juice in the Hokkien dialect of southern China. It's a likely origin for the word ketchup, although the Oxford English Dictionary also notes that ketchup may have come from the Malay word Kikap, which potentially was a word that came from the Chinese. Yeah, right. That's where ketchup sort of ketchup went from China to Malay, as Ken Al-Bala for the Smithsonian rights.
Starting point is 00:14:38 From China, it made its way to the Malay Peninsula and to Singapore where British colonists first encountered what locals called Kikap in the 18th century. Like soy sauce, it was deemed exotic and perked up what was a comparatively bland British cuisine. Which Dave loves. Such as roasts and fried foods. But he's liked it post these sauces coming. coming back, some sauces and spices, you know what I mean? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:03 Imagine it pre-sauce. Pre-salt. Yeah. What's that? A spice like salt. When it made its way to the English language, it had many spelling and pronunciation variance for many years before ketchup became the winner. That's the one that sort of won out.
Starting point is 00:15:21 Another one that lasted a while, quite a while actually, was cats up, much to Mr. Burns's confusion. Yes. ketchup. It actually means. It's the exact same thing. They were just variations of the same word. And he's just so old.
Starting point is 00:15:36 Yeah. But I think maybe it was still hanging around back in the 90s or whenever that episode came out. But it's the same thing. Same thing. Huh. So it really didn't matter which one he chose. I'll talk about it much later, but Heinz, who makes the most famous tomato ketchup, started out calling there's catsup and changed the kitchen.
Starting point is 00:15:56 And I think them changing to ketchup maybe was what popular. the ketchup spelling over cats. Yeah. Anyway, but I'll talk about Heinz later. I can't wait. Sizzle. Sausage sizzle.
Starting point is 00:16:12 Need sauce. Yes, need sauce. So yes, as much as it's become synonymous with tomato, ketchup isn't actually a single type of sauce. It's more than that. It's a way of life. Agreed.
Starting point is 00:16:23 Or at least a category of source. If you don't want to, maybe I was overstepping a bit with the way of life. life, although I reckon Dave might. Yeah. Could you eat a dry pie? Yeah, I can, depending on what the filling is.
Starting point is 00:16:36 Especially if you've got a chicken one. I don't need a tomato sauce or something. Sure. Because, like, you can offend makers of pies and dishes by reaching straight for the sauce. Yeah, especially if it's like an apple pie. They're probably like, oh, I don't know. They slap it out of the pie. They'd rather you not eat it at all.
Starting point is 00:16:56 It's sweet enough, thanks, Turkish. It's like, this is quite. a delicate sort of balance of flavors going on here. Yeah, if you drown it. Yeah, what? Yeah, what? That was me as a kid, eating meat. Yeah, right.
Starting point is 00:17:11 Just... Oh, but I can taste it still. Yeah. I can still see the meat. That's funny, like, if it was like, oh, no, I don't like dead animal seat, and you're, like, squirting a very bloody-looking substance all over it. Oh, that'll take my mind off of it. Oh, that's better.
Starting point is 00:17:29 Now I can forget. So, yeah, so early days it was much more of a fishy semen sauce. Sorry, that didn't come out quite how I intended it. No, that's how that tends to go. Oh, no. Anyway, let's detour. Let's talk tomatoes. We don't detour here.
Starting point is 00:17:49 I thought I tried a new thing out for block. Let's talk tomatoes. I'll write a guess. Talking tomatoes almost feels like an episode of getting fruity with Matt and the boys. Lawson. Conna Britannica, the wild species of tomatoes originated in the Andes Mountains of South America, probably mainly in Peru and Ecuador. For the Smithsonian, Barry Estabook writes, as far as we know, the inhabitants of the region never domesticated them. But a thousand miles to the north, the pre-Columbian residents of what is now southern Mexico set about planting
Starting point is 00:18:20 and cultivating them, saving the seeds of those that bore the biggest, tastiest fruits, and crossing desirable plants with one another. So, yeah, modern-day Mexico, but pre-Spanish invasion, that's where tomatoes started getting farmed. Oh, before, but in the Andes, though, like, we don't really care about this, but then it becomes like a proper thing when they're trying to improve.
Starting point is 00:18:46 Mm. But those... The crop. And those original tomatoes, they're still out and about in the wild, and the fruits are about as big as a peasant. They're tiny, tiny little, cute little tomatoes. And, yeah, apparently they've been very important just because, you know, wild tomatoes, they're very resilient. Whereas the ones that have been farmed and inbred, basically, over centuries are very susceptible to being wiped out by certain things.
Starting point is 00:19:15 And they've been able to use these original ones to help hardy them up a bit. Oh, right, they go back in... I believe. Cool. I read a little bit of a scientific article, and I've got to tell you, it was over my head. Yeah. You didn't have to tell us that. But that's what I gleamed.
Starting point is 00:19:30 We knew. You said scientific article, I went, okay, well, he got the gist, maybe. Oh, thank you so much. More than I could get. So the name tomatoes sought to be derived from the Nowatla, or Aztec word tomato. What, Tamattle? Back to Britannica. The tomato was introduced to Europe by.
Starting point is 00:19:53 the Spanish in the early 16th century, and the Spanish and Italian seemed to have been the first Europeans who were adopted as food, which I guess probably shouldn't be surprising. I think certainly Italian, I think Spanish food as well, very tomato-y. Yeah, what were they having before that? Isn't it? It's really interesting that it was only a few hundred years ago that the Italians started. You think of Italian food, probably carbs, some sort of carby thing, and tomato. Yes.
Starting point is 00:20:20 That's... Basel. That's it. Those three. Well, that's just basil and carb. That's still pretty good. That's Pesto, basically. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:28 You're on track. You're all right. Yeah. It would be very, you know, think about a pizza and pasta without tomato sauce. Tomato, not Australian tomato sauce. Sugo. So, yeah, it's interesting. Tomato sauce, I think tomato sauce in America might be what we call pasta sauce.
Starting point is 00:20:45 Yeah. Or pasta or whatever. Yeah. Very confusing. Yeah. I can imagine this being a nightmare to listen to. Cultural differences are crazy. I love them.
Starting point is 00:20:55 I love them. I love that we still have some. Because we're a little country that's dominated by British and American culture. And we just hang on a couple of things. Yeah. A couple of things that are just ours. One of those, tomato sauce. Us and New Zealand.
Starting point is 00:21:15 They're with us. You know one of my favorite ones of ours? Dax. Dax is, yeah. I found that out. I mean, dacking. Yeah, like dacking and like pants being called dacks, which doesn't happen very often except for tracky dacks now. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:28 Like tracks or if you're cacky dacks. Oh yeah. Which I mistakenly uses a fake answer for a who knew it in England and they're like, yeah. Because I, yeah, they say cack, but not dachs. Yeah. They'd say cack your pants. So they're just confused with that. They'd say cack your trousers or something because pants are underwear over there.
Starting point is 00:21:48 Yeah, yeah. Well, I guess if you're wearing them, that's probably the first line of defence. I never am. So I'm cacking for trousers. Straight to trowel. So, yeah. I've been thinking a lot about dacks lately. Dax on the brain.
Starting point is 00:22:03 Getting dack, yeah, because I think getting dacked is, I remember when I was a kid, an older cousin was playing Scrabble with the parents, and he put dacked down as a word. And they were all like, that's not a word. He's like, of course it's a word. Of course it is. Watch, I'll demonstrate on Matt. Matt has now been dacked.
Starting point is 00:22:22 That was the first time I heard the term dacked. Probably enough context here, but dacking is when you... Depancing. We run up to someone and you pull down their pants and sometimes also they're underpants if you want to be even more full on. I think Americans would call it pantsing. Pancing. Or is that what English would call it?
Starting point is 00:22:41 No, because pants are your underwear. Yeah, well, I mean, they'd probably call it flobbley. Oh dear, I've been flobbley-bobble it again. I say. I say. It's the fourth time. This wig I've been flobbley bollet. You know what they're like.
Starting point is 00:22:57 But we'd say, I've been dacked. Yeah. Proper English. And was the Scrabber word accepted, surely? No, it was not. They went to the dictionary and it wasn't it? He was playing with a bunch of teachers too, wasn't he? He's fucked.
Starting point is 00:23:09 Yeah. The Italians, the Spanish, they're into it. What were they doing at the La Tomatina Festival before the tomato? Yeah. Oh, my God. What were they throwing? Big Spanish tomato-based festival. I know.
Starting point is 00:23:20 When you were talking before about just a, like crushing a tomato, that's where it took me and it was triggering. Took you to Spain. Espanol. Yeah, La Tomatina. It was gross. So I'm going to do a quick side track now from the sidetrack. Like ketchup, peaches.
Starting point is 00:23:36 Peeches, pizzas origins can be traced back centuries prior to tomatoes landing in Europe. Isn't that weird? For the BBC, Caitlin Zana writes, flatbread, the ancestor to the contemporary pizza, was first documented in Latin text from 997 AD in southern Italy near Latsio. if that's how you say it with subsequent references noted throughout the Mediterranean from Spain to Greece
Starting point is 00:23:57 by the 16th century when tomatoes finally started arriving modern day pizza began to take shape in the Italian city of Naples pizza apparently comes from the Italian word Bin Therty
Starting point is 00:24:08 Again I don't know if that's how you say it It felt right It looks right It feels right I think the emphasis was in the right Val so that's good Well I did four years of Italian And I've got it in my blood
Starting point is 00:24:19 True And that means to pound or stamp a reference to the flat dough, not to how much pizza makes you horny. And it does. And it does. A pizzeri. A pizzeri. Naples was a thriving port, home to working class residents who lived in neighborhoods around the bay.
Starting point is 00:24:40 Small rooms meant most of their living was done outdoors. And people looked for food that was inexpensive and quick to eat. Baked in a hot oven and sold a street side, paper than pizza became the quince. essential fare for the Neapolitan poor. Tomatoes brought back by traders from the new world topped the dough along with an occasional smattering of anchovies, garlic or cheese. Cheese. Chase.
Starting point is 00:25:06 A chaise. That one I'm not sure you now. What are they called cheese in Italian? Chaz. Yeah, thank you. I was close, but not. You're right. You're right to pull me out.
Starting point is 00:25:19 Maybe I should do a pizza episode one day. We don't have time for this. Oh, God, don't. I'm already hungry just at the mention of pizza. Me too. I'm so excited. You weren't hungry at the mention of tomato ketchup? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:30 That's a lot of watch. I like, do you like the difference in sounds that me and Bop do when we're squeezing the tomato sauce bottle? Yeah, my sports bottles. My sauce bottles nearly out. What's yours, Dave? I was picturing Dave, gone. Now give it a shake. And then try again.
Starting point is 00:25:50 All right, banging on the bottom there. All right. And a bit of gravity being off here. Oh, wow. Oh, no. Too much. Too much. Come on, have some of mine.
Starting point is 00:26:00 Have some of mine. Dave. We know Dave. Affle may stop. He's not doing so. He's a relish man for sure. Oh, he's probably got like, spooning it out.
Starting point is 00:26:07 I was going to say, he's got, he's got a relish butler. Yeah. At my favorite local bakery, they say, you didn't deny it. Yeah, of course. They say, uh, tomato jam or chili relish. And I can't remember which is which, so I just go. 50-50. Yeah, could it get a mix, maybe turn them into a sauce.
Starting point is 00:26:24 The tomato butter will do that for me. You got any just master foods, guys. Yeah. Yeah, just give me one of those little squeezy packets. Yeah. So let's get back to the tomatoes. Sure. Enough about pizza.
Starting point is 00:26:36 This is Britannica. In France and Northern Europe, the tomato was initially grown as an ornamental plant and was regarded with suspicion. What the fuck? I'm not sure about this thing. Is it listening to us? That tomato's looking at me. But no, it was England and France and a lot of Northern Europe.
Starting point is 00:26:56 They were like, it's poisonous, we're pretty sure. The English people are like, it's got flavour. Yeah, it can't be it. It must be bad for you. And this was because it was a relative of the poisonous belladonna and the deadly nightshade. The Italians called the tomato Pomodoro, or golden apple, which has given rise to the speculation that the first tomatoes known to Europeans were, yellow.
Starting point is 00:27:21 You see it like that's much rarer now, but you'll see yellow tomatoes around. Oh, it makes his salad look quite nice. A little pop a color there. The salad butler does a great job. Toss the salad for me, Jeeves. Different to the sauce butler, please. You used to get fried green tomato tacos out of Mexican chain here, and they were so fucking good.
Starting point is 00:27:42 That sounds great. Green tomatoes. What does that mean? No, no, they were, oh yeah, as in they're no longer there. Yeah. Yes. Devastating. Not Jess is going and going
Starting point is 00:27:51 Give us some of that secret That fried green baby Yeah It was so good And then they stopped making them And now I'll set fire to those parts What is it
Starting point is 00:27:59 What is it green smoke Is it underwipened or is it I don't know Question without notice How do you So yeah That's the case with capsicum Yeah
Starting point is 00:28:08 It's all the same But it's just where you get When you get the yellow Red or green Or whatever Yeah Is that the same with tomato When you pick
Starting point is 00:28:14 Probably not A peck of pickle peppers Because there are There's a bunch of different types Of tomatoes Yeah. I mean, who are we? We're not tomato experts.
Starting point is 00:28:22 No. Except for Matt, who has spent the last week thinking about tomatoes. Green tomatoes are simply unripe tomatoes. Okay. And you like them fried and put in a taco? That sounds great. So, yeah, I thought that was interesting that, yeah, there's a theory that first tomatoes were yellow. And it's only at a guess because of what they were called.
Starting point is 00:28:41 Yeah, what they would be crazy to call them golden apples. Yes. If they were red. And it's also been suggested that the French, which Dave speaks a little bit of, of. Oh, we'll be. Called it POM d'Amour. Ah, POM d'Amour.
Starting point is 00:28:55 Or, Apple of... Love. More. Okay, Jess, you're ahead of Dave somehow and you're not even studying it. But yes, love Apple. And that was because we're sought to have aphrodisiical, Afrodisiacial. Can you say that word? Aphrodisiacal.
Starting point is 00:29:11 Yeah, it is hard. Aphrodisiacal. Aphrodisiacal. Oh, properties. But, of course, it wouldn't be academic. Came you without a dissenting opinion. People are like, that's a fun theory, but some scholars assert that the tomato was at first taken to be a kind of eggplant, of which it's a close relative.
Starting point is 00:29:32 And the eggplant. Hence the aphrodisiac. The eggplant was called Pom Dermores, Apple of the Moors, because it was a favorite vegetable of the Arabs. And Pomodoro and Pom Damo may be corruptions of that name. So that's another, that's another theory, at least according to Britannica. It's either they were golden and they were full of love, or they were thought to be eggplants. I prefer the love slash yellow one.
Starting point is 00:30:04 They also look quite different to eggplants. Yeah, but it's funny back then, they're like, oh, they hadn't seen anything. Yeah. So they couldn't tell the difference between anything. That's what grows on a plant? Is it a banana? What? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:30:20 No, it's a flower. I'm frightened. I'm suspicious of that one. Lock it up. Throw it away the key. And so in 1733 they did put all tomatoes in prison. Yes, they were suspicious of them. They really were.
Starting point is 00:30:35 I'm not going into it, but they were weird with tomatoes. According to the Cambridge world history of food, tomatoes are thought to have been introduced to China of either Philippines or Macau. Also in the 16th century, they were given the name fan chayi, something like that, which translates as foreign eggplant, which, if it isn't already, should be a fun euphemism for sex in a backpackers. Got a bit of foreign eggplant last night, if you know what I mean. No, you didn't.
Starting point is 00:31:04 I did. Man, I had some fan chai, I tell you that. Yeah, let me tell you. All night long. Sorry, sorry, I'm late to meet you of this tour group. That would have a bit of foreign eggplant for know. If you know what I'm a little bit you heard of this, over 65s too. Then my God.
Starting point is 00:31:20 My God. The bunk bed was a rockin. Jess, I was sleeping your dorm. And I couldn't sleep last night. And I know that that's not the case. You were snoring all night. I was watching. So, okay.
Starting point is 00:31:37 One of us is a weirdo. Okay. So, yeah, just be careful, all right? I just had a feeling you'd be lying. So I watch you. There was no FAMCHA. What was the word? Fanciai.
Starting point is 00:31:48 You didn't have any fancii. Spelt F, A, with a line over the top. N-Q-I-E with an upward... Oh, wow. But I looked up a pronouncing video, and I've written down phonetically a few days ago, so I can't... Yes. Fanci-I-Y. And was it our man doing the pronunciation video?
Starting point is 00:32:07 I think it was our man. I got to listen to him a few times for this report. Can you do him? Uh-huh. Just our word. This week is the Chinese word for tomatoes. Van Chaii. Van Chai is a good one,
Starting point is 00:32:32 which translates as foreign eggplant, which, if it isn't already, could be a fun euphemism for sex, backpackers, I had than chaii. You've absolutely nailed it because he's thinking, obviously, there must be some sort of time limit he's got a hit for the video
Starting point is 00:32:59 to get an ad or something, because he's like, he could just say fan chaii, fan chaii, don't but he's always, the run-up is so long. The word, we are looking, so you nailed it. But the, uh, he does it again, it makes me laugh every time. I've been, I was, uh, walking around
Starting point is 00:33:15 in my place yesterday doing a lot of Bob Catter. And it's all just like, I'm not going to, I'm imagining no one else's home. No, no. I was, yeah. Home alone. Oh, ho.
Starting point is 00:33:38 Yeah, you know, when, I wouldn't do it for an audience. God, no. No, you two, maybe. We don't count. How many does this do of his mouth? I'll punch me. I'll punch goals in the mouth, listen. No.
Starting point is 00:33:52 No. No. It's really annoyed too. No? Yes, that was an alien, not today. Anyway, like I keep trying to tell you, ketchup didn't start out as a tomato product. So you can forget about all that stuff for now. Don't stop worrying about tomatoes.
Starting point is 00:34:10 I'll do a whole tomato episode one day. Okay. If need be. If there's a, if there's a, if there's a, real want for it. There's demand. I mean, we've still got seven episodes to go and block this year. That's true.
Starting point is 00:34:20 Who knows? Who knows? It's exciting. So, back to catch it. As Eubank writes, for centuries, people have been making... UBank. UBank. Like the bank.
Starting point is 00:34:29 Oh, no, EW Bank, in this case. Ew Bank. Oh, okay. Not UBank. And UBank writer for Atlas Obscura. I thought it might also be the... Okay, a person. The no frills bank that we have here.
Starting point is 00:34:42 Yeah. Do you want me, if I'm quoting from... From Anne Eubank, do you want to say, I'll try and remember to say and you bank? No, it's fine. I know now. I was just double-checking that. Well, what if the next one might be the actual bank? Well, that's the thing.
Starting point is 00:34:57 I'm concerned if they're, because they keep changing how you earn interest and it keeps annoying me. So I'd be more concerned that like put a bit more time into the banking side of things guys rather than writing articles about tomatoes and ketchup. Exactly. So I just want to make sure. But it's Anne Eubank and that's fine. She's allowed to write about it. and Eubank, rights. For centuries, people have been making ketchup out of all kinds of fruits,
Starting point is 00:35:20 vegetables, and fungi. And all this creativity stem from people trying to recreate that beautiful fish sauce from Asia. Oh, yeah. Wow. Historians believe that the briny liquid had a hold on foreign sailors to the point that they tried to recreate something similar when they got home. Eubank, and continues, the first English recipe for ketchup, spelled K-A-A-A. A T-C-H-U-P.
Starting point is 00:35:47 Katsh-Up. Appears in a 17-27 cookbook as a fish sauce. That sounds posh. Katshup. Kut-K-U-K-K-K-T-U-S-A-K-K-K-T-U-S. I'll stop with the flobbly and have some ketchup. I think, yeah, it sounds English. And I think we confuse English with Posh.
Starting point is 00:36:05 Not all English is posh. No. Some English people are very much like you and I. No, that's not true. We're the worst of them, hence they sent us to this tropical Paradise Island. And we're so upset about it. That's true that every English accent sounds a bit posh to us. And that's absurd to English people.
Starting point is 00:36:25 Yes. But you sound posh. Yeah, yeah. Especially if you're saying ketchup, that's posh as shit. That's posh. That's right. And we've got like that orange tan on. Yeah, and yeah, but very pale lipstick.
Starting point is 00:36:36 Yeah. Yeah. That's posh. That's posh. That's posh. That's posh. That's posh. That's exactly.
Starting point is 00:36:42 That's how we learn about posh. Yeah. Spice girls. heard of it before. Posh Spice and her friends are the poshists. Yeah. We don't have posh here. No.
Starting point is 00:36:51 So, yeah. We also don't have babies here. We don't have babies. Okay. Baby Spice. Baby Spice. Do we have scary? Mate, everything here's trying to blood to kill you, mate.
Starting point is 00:37:04 So many people say they don't want to come to Australia because they're scared of the insects or the spiders and snakes. I've never seen a snake in my life. Oh, yeah. In the wild. Yeah, and like you were talking about tropical. island. We're nowhere near a tropical zone. It's a big island. It's fucking huge. And some of the parts got a lot of snakes. Some of the parts, very few snakes. Some of the parts have snow and others
Starting point is 00:37:26 have tropical and there's desert. We have a bit of everything. I've told you, I'm sure, before on this show, that at uni, an American exchange student was so pissed off when she arrived because Melbourne was nothing like what she pictured it to be. She thought it was going to be, you know, red dirt the outback do a quick google yeah it's not that hard but was google around in the well no of course that's true you were arriving on the convict ships is that correct yes that's right she was on she's pierced oh come on i'm here for exchange i thought i was going to be serving my sentence in the bloody the red dirt yes so but yeah i'm i'm like oh that that's so that's so funny but like because i went to uni in the like in the suburbs exactly so i would have
Starting point is 00:38:12 really, like, you'd have been like, what the fuck is this? She did no research at all. Yeah. Yeah. If you were going to study in Melbourne as an exchange student, and I, you know, I love my uni. Yeah. Good uni. Enough, you know, it's a good, it's a good uni, but it's not a place you'd travel from the other side. You'd go to RMYT or some of the, one of the central city ones if you were going to. You would think so. I guess. I suppose. Because that way you're, you know, you're around the action. Yeah, the red dirt. Whereas Clayton. Yeah, not the red dirt. Doesn't even have a train station. I think it's getting one though. Oh, that'd be good.
Starting point is 00:38:43 But this was quite a while again. It's got the Notting Hill Hotel. Before trains. That's true. That's something. Went there not too long ago. It's very swish these days. It's a bit swish.
Starting point is 00:38:51 We don't have posh, but we've got swish. We've got pockets of swish, thanks. Yeah, yeah. You know, you've got to know where to look for the swish, but it's there. Yeah. But we don't have posh. No. We don't have ketchup.
Starting point is 00:39:03 We don't have ketchup. That's how we got on to this. So sorry. Let's keep going. The author, Eliza Smith, wrote the... The bank. wrote the ketchup recipe in 1727 and that instructs the reader to put wine, shallots, anchovies, spices and and seasonings into bottles.
Starting point is 00:39:24 I've never said anchovies like this, but I've done it twice and I'm loving it. Anchovies. I like it too. Because that is posh, right? Yes. Antchavies. Yes, I like it. And then, yeah, you put all that in a bottles.
Starting point is 00:39:35 And after a week, she writes, the mixture can be added to sources for fish and savory meat dish So that, yeah, so it's like a fish sauce to put on fish. Yeah. Albalah, have I mentioned Albaela yet? Because otherwise I'm bringing him up out of frickin' nowhere. I think I have. Okay, yeah, you probably have. Ken Albaula, writing for Smithsonian.
Starting point is 00:39:57 Yep. He suggests that the recipe bears more resemblance to a modern Worcestershire sauce than a ketchup. Ah, Wistachshiree. But I don't know much about Worcestershire sauce. I don't know that video of that Italian guy trying to say it And it's really funny Yeah Well, what's just the cheery?
Starting point is 00:40:15 Shiree Butler suggests the 18th century Was the Golden Age for ketchup Writing cookbooks featured recipes For ketchup made of oysters, Muscles, mushrooms, Walnuts, lemons, celery And even fruits like plums and peaches
Starting point is 00:40:32 Seems like ketchup just used to mean Have a way broader meaning Just a real mish mash. Yeah, it's just like condiment almost, you know? Yeah, yeah. Could be anything. Fun fact, perhaps. Let Jess decide.
Starting point is 00:40:45 Apparently, mushroom ketchup was Jane Austen's favorite. Or Jane Austen's favorite. Oh, that's posh as shit. Yeah. Whoa. Mushroom ketchup. I guess, yeah. I love mushrooms, but that doesn't sound good to me.
Starting point is 00:40:59 No, I don't like mushrooms, so that's no good for me, thanks. I mean, I try it. I love a mushroom gravy. I love a mushroom tomato sauce. I can pasta sauce. Chili tomato and mushrooms is a fantastic combination
Starting point is 00:41:13 I can't take food advice from you because last night you just put tomato sauce on pasta It was no good Of course it wasn't It sounds fucking horrific But it is I've never had it sober before
Starting point is 00:41:24 And yeah It was a little Underwhelming Did you finish it? Yeah I did And I felt awful afterwards It was just absolutely zero Nutritional
Starting point is 00:41:35 Oh just the acid reflux After Just everything about it And I had, it was quite late at night. I'd been reading about ketchup and writing about ketchup for days, and I think it got into my head. Yeah. But it was tomato sauce, by the way.
Starting point is 00:41:47 Yeah, not ketchup. I've only just found out, because I think I accidentally buy ketchup sometimes, and it really is not very different. No. It is slightly thicker and maybe slightly sweeter. Yep. According to the cravat. But you miss that vinegoury taste.
Starting point is 00:42:04 Hmm. Which they both have as well, by the way. They both have vinegar. They're very similar. Yeah. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all-in-one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online. Whether you're just starting out or growing your business,
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Starting point is 00:43:41 slash do go on for a free trial and to save 10% off of your first purchase of a website or domain. Butler continues when talking about this golden age of ketchup. I wish I was around. I love a sauce. Although, what a beautiful variety of sources. But Butler says, usually components were either boiled down into a syrup-like consistency
Starting point is 00:44:03 or left to sit with salt for extended periods of time. Both these processes led to a highly concentrated end product, a salty, spicy, flavor bomb that could last for a long time without going bad. One oyster ketchup recipe from the 1700s called for 100 oysters, three points of white wine and lemon peels spiked with mason cloves. That's a lot of oysters. It's a lot of oysters. And aren't oysters in Afrodisiac? Oh, my God. That is a horny sauce.
Starting point is 00:44:31 Yeah, a hundred of them would have gone wild over that one. Jeez, Louise. And how much points? wine? Do you say three pints? Three pints, but yeah, pints has meant different things over the years. Also, a pint of wine is insane. What are they thinking? Imagine.
Starting point is 00:44:45 Here's your pint of rosé. But, yeah, I think, pipe car, prefer a schooner. No, I'm all right, yeah. I think, like, pint now means 500, what is it, 60, whatever it is, some very specific amount of mills. But I think it's meant heaps of different things over the years. And even now it means different things like in Adelaide,
Starting point is 00:45:04 that size is an imperial pint and a pint is what we'd call a schooner and then there's a European pint which I think is like half a liter exactly and that's just that's beers but I think pints has meant anyway I'm just trying to get a hand on how much sauce they're making with a hundred
Starting point is 00:45:22 well that's the interesting thing because it's a small bottle yeah these old recipes are confusing because the measurements meant weird things but they also they didn't specify or how much it was to make.
Starting point is 00:45:35 And Eubank sort of took, the woman, talks about how it can be confusing, saying cookbooks published before the 20th century, a delightful tomes of mystery. Sometimes there are recipes for cakes that call for dozens of eggs, making you wonder if the resulting cakes were enormous, or if the eggs were just smaller. Dozens. You back thinks, probably both. Then there are the quirky ingredients lists, calling for amounts of butter the size of a hen's egg. That has made me wonder, Ubank writes.
Starting point is 00:46:06 And Newbank. And Ubank. Sorry. That makes me, and Ubank, wonder, if eggs were just really consistent in size back then. But she then thinks, probably not. Okay. I would say eggs are very consistent in size now. I don't think they were back then.
Starting point is 00:46:22 No. Well, I mean, now they're sorted, aren't they? You can get the X-L. You can get the jumbo. Medium size. Emu size. That's a big one. So, yeah, so there was this, there were hundreds of years.
Starting point is 00:46:36 It's just big as an emu, not an emu egg, it's as big as an emu. It was a real wild west. Yeah, right. Just little pockets of all sorts of different ketchupes going around. So how do we get to the tomato dominated world of ketchup? Well, this was brought about with a successful rebank branding of tomatoes. Because remember, England, they were just like, you can't eat tomatoes. Is it poisonous?
Starting point is 00:46:59 Yeah. And the people that do like them, they're still suspicious of them. Yeah. Spanish and Italians. Yeah, you taste fantastic, but I do not trust you. So, yeah, we know the Spanish and Italians tucked straight in. As soon as they saw them, they went to give us some of that. But the English, and by extension, the Americans were shit scared of tomatoes.
Starting point is 00:47:20 Classic. Andrew F. Smith writes, why many Europeans considered the tomato inedible or poisonous remains a matter of conjecture. Though the fact that they are related to poisonous plants, and in fact their leaves are poisonous, I didn't realize, may have something to do with it. Have you been eating the leaves? Yes. Okay.
Starting point is 00:47:37 I'll be munching on them. I'm feeling funny in the tummy. It has been straight after I ate a huge bowl of pasta pasta sauce with just tomato sauce on it, though. Oh, you had leaves for dessert? I had leaves for dessert, yeah. An apatif or a digest teeth, whichever the after one is. Apertief feels like it should be because it's close to after, but I think it's before. Then you have a little digestive.
Starting point is 00:47:57 It should be really called the before teeth. I agree. That's what I'd do if I was going to change. Waiter, one before teeth. Okay. Sure. He would know what I mean. Before my teeth.
Starting point is 00:48:10 He'd know what I mean. Smith continues, children have developed severe reactions from making tea from the leaves of the tomato plant, and cattle and hogs have been poisoned with garden cleanings. If 16th century herbalists ate the leaves, they might well have concluded that the fruit of the plants was poisonous too. But then came a shift, as Traverso writes, the first doctor to shift people's perception of tomatoes in England was the physician
Starting point is 00:48:36 John Gerard. Smith writes that Gerard was a barber surgeon and the superintendent of the Gardens of the College of Physicians in Holborn and he received tomatoes from Spain and Italy. He noticed that the Spanish and Italians were able to safely eat tomatoes but noted that they first boiled them with pepper, salt and oil. So he's like, if we cook them, they'll be fine to it. They're poisonous only until you cook them. And then they're all good. I love the title of Barber Surgeon. Yeah, Dave enjoyed that too.
Starting point is 00:49:07 What popped into your head, Dave? Oh, did you go down for a quick cut, which type? Isn't that? And also the barber before surgeon, too. Yeah, yeah. Barber first surgeon? Yeah, dabble. Isn't that something to do with, you know, those twirly things outside of the barbers
Starting point is 00:49:20 with the red and the blue and the white? Isn't that like the red is blood or some shit? Or is that a myth? Oh, and what's the white? What's the blue? I have no idea. All right. I brought it up, just to save people yelling at their iPods. Barba, what would I call those things?
Starting point is 00:49:38 Twirlie. Red, white. Twirling. Origin. Enter. Okay, thanks for that. Also, you should be on the internet, not in a Word document. Oh, I've just got a cursor, just blinking.
Starting point is 00:49:54 It says log in or something. Log in. That's a correct password. That's a Wikipedia page. I don't know what Wikipedia is but it's all about Barber's pole Schumann's just, yeah, must be... Maybe that's what they're called Wikipedia's.
Starting point is 00:50:08 Yes. Origin, during the middle ages barbers perform surgery on customers as well as tooth extractions. The original pole had a brass and wash basin at the top representing the vessel in which leeches were kept
Starting point is 00:50:24 and bottom representing the basin that received the blood. The pole itself represents the staff that the patient gripped during the procedure to encourage blood flow, and the twinned pole motif is likely related to the caduceus, the staff of the Greek god, of speed in commerce, Hermes. Evidence, for example, it's the most convoluted symbology I've ever heard of.
Starting point is 00:50:49 Evidence, for example, by early physician Van Helmont's description of himself as Francis Maccurius Van Helmont, a philosopher by that one in Hermit's, are all things, a wandering her might. What the fuck? I don't... Did barbers cut hair or were they surgeons? I don't think they did both. What?
Starting point is 00:51:09 So you go in and it's like, what can I do for you today? Just, you know, a bit off the back and sides, thanks. And then the next guy comes in and goes, I need this tooth taken out. And the next guy comes in and says, I've just been shot. And it's all the same shop. And then the guy goes, sorry, the haircut comes first. They were in here first. Sit down, wait your turn.
Starting point is 00:51:26 It's not a triage system. Wait your term. It's first in best dress. It's first in. You wait. This guy has a lot of hair. You're going to be waiting a while. You'll probably bleed out.
Starting point is 00:51:34 Now grab my pole. Not that pole. Surgeons, barbers, teeth pullers, bloodletting. And the barber pole, the red apparently, this is according to barbara Industries.com. Not that, that's red the blood from surgical procedures. The white is the bandages used to stop the bleeding in the blue added in the US, said to represent veins or the echo. or to echo the American flag. Vains or patriotism.
Starting point is 00:52:03 Hmm. Either or. Anyway, isn't that? That's bizarre. What a fun detour that was. So strange. So strange. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:11 Yeah. Would you trust your barber to also like take out your tonsils? Yeah. Considering that the place I go to, I've never had the same person twice. The barber. Yeah. It's always a new guy in there. I'm like, hey, a bit off the back that you guys, all right?
Starting point is 00:52:25 It's always someone different. And he shrugs like that? Yeah. How many times have you been there? I've been going there for a couple of years every year. And it's always someone different. Actually, there's one guy who must be the manager I've had a couple of times. And he has a thing where, you know, when they want you to, like, tilt your head forward
Starting point is 00:52:40 so they can cut the back or tilt your head back so they can do the sides or whatever. He pushes forward and back at the same time. And I never know what way he wants me to go. But he doesn't say anything. He just sort of grunts a bit like, mm-mm. Until I'm like, this, like this? What is it that you want? What do you want?
Starting point is 00:52:58 Please tell me. Please tell me. Like, head down, head down. Nope, no, head up, head up. Confusing. But everyone else is new every time. Really? That's so interesting.
Starting point is 00:53:07 Yeah. I feel like because you've got such a consistent cut that they should have a mold or something they can do. Put a hat on you where the right amount of legs kind of just shave. Like, I come in, I just say the Dave. I'll have the Dave, please. One day, please. So, yes, so Barbersurg and Gerard. He was the one who started reviving the, the,
Starting point is 00:53:28 The image of tomatoes. That's so funny. Well, not even reviving because it's really the first time in England that people were like, oh, okay, if a doctor surgeon's telling us, I mean a Dr. Barber, he cuts my hair. I'm going to trust him on poison. What's poison, what's poison, what's not poison. So, yeah, he noticed the Spanish and Italians, cooked them first. He's like, if we do that, they will be edible.
Starting point is 00:53:51 And his influence was really strong, so much so that in America, you know, other side of the world, Medical and agricultural publications quoted his comments about tomatoes as late as the 1830s, which is 100 years after he died. Wow. That's... And so, yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:09 Science would have come on a fair way by then. This guy, he nears a barband to search. But he was saying you've got to cook them first. Yeah. Okay. Which isn't true. You can eat it. They're so good straight off the bush.
Starting point is 00:54:22 I grew some like little tomatoes. Yeah. And I would call them cherry tomatoes, but the specific thing said some other shit, you know, cherry tomatoes. And just that flavor explosion, oh my goodness. They taste different. Yeah, when they're fresh. Fresh. From the bush.
Starting point is 00:54:43 Get them from a big supermarket or whatever. They've probably chilled the shit out of them before to prolong their shelf life, which takes away a lot of the flavor. I'm sorry to say it. I used to work in the produce at one of the big chains You were part of the problem But I'm now a whistleblower Yeah And that's part of the solution
Starting point is 00:55:03 You gotta watch you back They will be coming for you Traverso writes By the mid-1700s English doctors were not only embracing Love apples Tomatoes But prescribing them as medicine
Starting point is 00:55:14 Mostly to treat digestive and liver-related conditions They've over-corrected Now they're prescribing tomatoes They've gone from poison to cure To like you need six of them Neither were true. Yeah, it's just a...
Starting point is 00:55:28 But it's, it was funny reading about this. I'm like, man, there's so many echoes of this throughout my whole life. Every time of my life there's been some miracle fruit discovered from some foreign land. You've got to have this. It'll fix everything. That's perfect. You've got to activate it or whatever. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:49 Just have an assayee bowl. Yeah. It's a super food. What are those mushrooms that were big last year? Oh, lines main. Yeah, you've got to get those mushrooms. You've got to have caps of mushrooms or sprinkle them and over stuff. Tea, have them in...
Starting point is 00:56:03 Yeah. And, of course, that works. Well, yeah, I mean, I don't know. I actually, I had one in, in Scotland, I think, in Edinburgh. And I had a cafe, they did one. It's like, try our special brain formula. It was lines main, and I'm like, all right. How do you feel?
Starting point is 00:56:23 I mean, I didn't know. Look at him. He is powerful. He is unbelievable. I didn't notice, but can you, do I seem different to you now than before I left? You've got to move miles an hour. I can't keep up with your thoughts. You're on another plane.
Starting point is 00:56:38 I keep trying to, I can't think of a word, but you've got it straight away, yeah. Well, if you could see him inside my brain, it's that when I know what, write a GIF or GIF. Where she's putting all the numbers. Yeah, yeah. Where she's really confused. Yeah. That's not in my brain. What's happening?
Starting point is 00:56:58 Where am I? I'm frightened. They're starting to think. It's a cure. It's a medicine. Tomatoes are actually magic. Traverso continues. I don't know if I've had a stomachache.
Starting point is 00:57:09 I know what I need. It's a big bowl of tomatoes. Yeah. Ragoletto. That'll sort me out. A bolognese. Traverso continues. British physicians traveling to America took the tomatoes as medicine concept.
Starting point is 00:57:24 to the other side of the Atlantic. And Thomas Jefferson, credited a British doctor John de Sequeira for introducing tomatoes to Virginia. That's a British name. According to Jefferson, De Sequaria, would claim that, quote, a person who should eat a sufficient abundance of these apples
Starting point is 00:57:43 would never die. Wow, never die. And what happened to him? He's still alive. He's still kicking, yeah. Whoa. So, who's in the pudding? The tomato pudding.
Starting point is 00:57:53 And he eats tomatoes like apples. Eat up. It's like a full hand for it. Just give that a wipe on your jeans. Yeah. You got to give my wipe. I'm like, I didn't even mean that. That is improv.
Starting point is 00:58:03 I don't know, either level one or two. Oh, that's two. Yeah, I might be level two. That's two. Yeah. Level one, they're like, I mean, just, you're holding an apple like this. Was one of the many things I really struggled with was what they'd call object work, where they're like miming with things.
Starting point is 00:58:23 I'm like, I feel like, I feel so stupid. Oh, doing it or not honestly, because I often find if I've seen a couple of mimeshows at the comedy festival, everyone's laughing, they know what they're doing? I'm like, what is that? Yeah. What is he holding? Is that a walking stick or is that a fish?
Starting point is 00:58:40 What the fuck is that? Everyone's like, oh, it's so clever. And I'm like, I don't know what he's holding. I don't get it. I feel like pretending that you're washing dishes or whatever. I feel stupid doing it. But watching someone do it, I'm like, no idea what they're doing. I'm trying to pass it to you.
Starting point is 00:58:53 Like, well, is that a young. Oh, yo, what is that? What is this? You're smashing the mandatory plates. How about you use your words. I'm getting all these accidental laughs, but being like, what's going on?
Starting point is 00:59:02 He's playing a stupid character. When you got off the stage, when you were juggling up there, that was so funny. And you're like, okay, I was drying my hands. Yeah, I was changing a nappy. But, yeah, so John DeSiquaria,
Starting point is 00:59:19 still a love to this day we assume. Traverso continues soon the buzz about medicinal love apples They've gone from poison to aphrodisiacs to aphrodisiacs that'll fix all sorts of ailments It'll keep you alive forever
Starting point is 00:59:35 Feels like something my GP's close to recommending Well, we've tried everything else Yeah, have it a love apple The doctors in the US started prescribing tomato secure In ingestion, diarrhoea amongst a bunch of other things Well, that's not going to help
Starting point is 00:59:50 No Interestingly, as Smith points out, it was doctors and physicians rather than chefs and cooks that authored the first tomato-based recipes in U.S. cookbooks. That's interesting. So barbers were doing medicine, doctors were doing cookbooks. The world was topsy-per-mey. Didn't know if I was hither-n't-o-thither. It was all flubly-bly, wouldn't it?
Starting point is 01:00:12 It's such a versatile phrase. Yeah. English is a beautiful language. It's a beautiful and, yeah, beautiful. language. So well-sand. A beautiful and a flibbidibbitty language. What's another word for nice?
Starting point is 01:00:28 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just sort of trailed off there. I really thought I got away with it. No one noticed. AJ or snip around that. You'll be perfect. You look really smart. You guys all look so dumb.
Starting point is 01:00:40 Why are they talking? Why are they talking to our beautiful queen? She's beautiful and beautiful. Doesn't matter. And a queen, I guess. A bit of queen who's a queen-like. Al-Bala writes that... Sorry, who he writes?
Starting point is 01:00:59 Al-Balla. These names are incredible. And sorry to fact, Jackie, but are you making up most of them? No, Al-Bala from the Smithsonian. Okay, sorry. He writes that what we now know as ketchup was made in the early 19th century in the US with tomatoes, obviously, sweetened, soured with vinegar, and spiced with cloves, all-spice, nutmeg, and ginger. pretty much the modern day recipe.
Starting point is 01:01:22 Heinz makes the most famous ones, they're secret about it, much like the Kentucky fried seven herbs and spices. Yeah, yeah. So it's a secret recipe, but a lot of other places make it and it taste similar. They've probably figured it out, basically.
Starting point is 01:01:37 The first published recipe for tomato ketchup was written in 1812 by Philadelphia scientists and horticulturalist James Meese in the archives of useful knowledge volume 2. I found a Fox News article, which I was going to use, and I thought it was funny or not funny enough, but it was so patriotic. It was pretty funny. An article about ketchup. Yeah, it was like, God bless America, we did it.
Starting point is 01:02:04 Look at what we've done for the world. Giving them ketchup. So, yeah, so he published the first one. Then a physician from Ohio really went all in on tomatoes being a miracle food. Like what we're talking about before, this guy took it up a notch. Wow. History Facts writes that in 1834, John Cook Bennett, the physician, advertised tomatoes as a medical panacea. He propagated the idea that tomatoes could cure jaundice, diarrhea and other ailments.
Starting point is 01:02:31 Traverso writes that in 1840, Bennett moved to Illinois, where he helped establish the state's medical society and became a Mormon. During his time in the Church of Jesus Christ of the Latter-day Saints, he continued to promote tomatoes, authoring an article on the benefit of the fruit for the Mormon newspaper Time and Seasons. So he really converted, like the Mormons already converted to Mormonism, but he was converting the Mormons to Tomatoism. And is that okay? Well, in 1842, he was excommunicated by the founder of Mormonism, Joseph Smith. Oh dear.
Starting point is 01:03:06 But by this stage, apparently Mormons were, yeah, they were all in on tomatoes curing digestion problems. In his post-Mort, he was kicked out of Mormonism, by the way, for infidelity. Oh. I don't think I understand Mormonism that well. He was rooting around. Right, because you are.
Starting point is 01:03:24 I'd have multiple wives. Yes, but I guess he had multiple girlfriends. Oh, okay. He didn't put a ring up. They're like, you're going to marry that? Yeah. You got to get it out. You're going to marry that.
Starting point is 01:03:34 Mormonism. You're going to marry that? Dave, is that how you think Mormons think of women as objects? Or is that how you think of women? Yeah. Were you in character? Because either way, I think you might have been offensive then. I'm not sure.
Starting point is 01:03:45 I'm not sure which is worse. I don't want to say anything. You can ever a third option if you've got one? Beautiful or beautiful. So in his post-Morman days, Cook continued pushing the medical and medicinal benefits of tomatoes, apparently medical and medicinal, apparently writing in publications in America or England,
Starting point is 01:04:11 and Jess, you might like this, Australia. Cook wrote, an article in our country. There's tomato physician. Yeah. That's right. This has been mentioned. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 01:04:25 That's so exciting. It didn't really take off here like it did in America. America was all in on tomato crazed. Traverso writes in 1835, Dr. A.J. Holcomb introduced the first tomato pills in Glassboro, Alabama. Other tomato pills salesmen soon followed, including Cleveland-based Archibald Miles and Yale educated Dr. Guy R. Phelps. Advertised as a pure extract of tomato fruit.
Starting point is 01:04:51 These capsules were sold in pharmacies and grocery stores and promoted with the jingle, Tomato Pills Will Cure All Your Ills. Wow, that is good, actually. Why haven't they done that with all pills? Because it rhymes with ills. Yeah, that's so good. But isn't that amazing? Tomato pills.
Starting point is 01:05:09 Or it's just like tomatoes, smush down, the goodness of tomato is smushed down into a pill. And you get rid of that awful, awful taste of tomato. You're no longer enough to eat that. Yeah. Disgusting taste. You can bypass the taste buds. Gulp. Now that's good miving.
Starting point is 01:05:27 That was good mime. I knew what you were doing. Was that a walking stick? No, it was a fish, you idiot. I was juggling a fish. According to Smith, not all doctors endorsed the tomato pills craze. During a debate hosted by the AMA, the American Medical Association, some physicians disputed tomatoes medical.
Starting point is 01:05:44 properties and criticised tomato pills, which later investigations found contained no tomato at all. It's so easy to include. It had no tomato with it. What was in it, do you know? Definitely not tomato. It's something easier to come by. I guess it's like we've skipped over, but it's also very funny or interesting to me that the way tomatoes got from South America to North America was via England. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:12 Isn't that wild? Yeah. And via England, I should say, via Spain. Yes. And Italy, it's such a long way around and it's come almost back to where it began. Yeah, they were like Mexico had been farming it for centuries, but they got it from interesting. It is interesting.
Starting point is 01:06:35 So Traversa rides by 1865, medical myths about tomatoes started to fade. Like, it is true. Like, we look back now and I go, that's all very silly. But there will be 100% things now that we believe that aren't true. Yeah. Vaccines, climate change. For example. For example.
Starting point is 01:06:56 Yeah. Traversal rights by 1865, medical myths about tomatoes started a fade, but tomatoes had already become a favorite American vegetable. Their popularity counts, and I know some people are saying it's a fruit, but I think colonarily or some shit, it's a vegetable, whatever. Yeah. I'm not putting it in my fruit salad, okay? That would be awful.
Starting point is 01:07:15 But I'm putting it in my salad salad. You're a vegetable salad? Or my salad sandwich? Yeah, 100%. Cheese and salad sandwich, slice of tomato, what two? Yes, please. Lettuce. Yes.
Starting point is 01:07:28 A bit of carrot. Carrot, thank you very much. Beat root, yes, please. Yes, I'll have some of that, please. Slices of cucumber? Oh. Don't mind if I do. Fantabulous.
Starting point is 01:07:40 And then, you know, I'll have. Other bits and pieces. Yeah, whatever. Alfalfa, sure. Nah, fuck it off. I don't want it, but if you're telling me it's got miracle properties. I take alfalfa pills. I have tomato with them.
Starting point is 01:07:54 I mean, I deal like vitamin pills and stuff like that. I don't know. There are certainly some things that people take. Yeah. That probably do nothing. Yep. And I probably take some. Probably.
Starting point is 01:08:07 You know, like my penis pills. Yeah. You don't have a penis. I've been taking it for years. is still no signs. No penis. Not even a nub. Come on.
Starting point is 01:08:17 How long are these things supposed to take? Yeah? Yeah. Well, on the bottle it says, could take some time. Whereas I've been taking penis pills. Getting a lot of dink. Yeah, right.
Starting point is 01:08:27 There you go. Well, see, it works. One time of day you've been taking them. Maybe that's it. Yeah, you've got to take it with breakfast. Lunch and dinner, baby. Oh, okay. I've just, yeah, I've only been taking them.
Starting point is 01:08:40 brunch um supper midnight snack oh gotta take with the classics just need a little little treat i have a penis bill that's taking penis bills just to be very very clear a lot of that around it was a joke but the fact that man is taking penis pills is true that is true but i'm just reading comes from truth i'm just reading there's a study saying that actually don't contain any penis in them. Oh. That's disappointing. That is disappointing.
Starting point is 01:09:16 I don't know who to trust anymore. I can't trust the penis bill of sales, man. He was the most trustworthy. You know, like he set up an office. It was not an office. It was more like a card table in an alley, but he, um, you know, he was very charismatic. He made me some wonderful promises. Yes.
Starting point is 01:09:33 He said he was a surgeon and a barber. They became a popular vegetable in this bizarre way. that they sort of were Trojan-horsed in as a medicine and people were like, I actually like the taste of them. So, yeah, they were there to stay. And their popularity also coincided with innovations in commercial bottling that helped pave the way
Starting point is 01:09:54 for ketchup's future assent, tomato ketchup. And now is time for the big dog to step up one, Enrir J. Heinz. Oh, wow. There was some sizzle about this an hour ago. This is exciting. In 1869, Hines was 25 years old and living at home with his mom in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Loser.
Starting point is 01:10:18 And this is where he finally entered the game and start producing his iconic grated horseradish. Ah. Yeah, it was a pure and superior grated horseradish, according to the Hines website, and made using his mother's recipe. The Hines website writes, grew the horseradish on a patch of garden, his father gave him. At the time, most companies used brown bottles to obscure their lower-grade ingredients, but Henry Hines bottled his horseradish in clear glass to display its purity and quality.
Starting point is 01:10:52 Wow. But that is the Hines website, so basically propaganda. You know, they would say that. Yeah, they would. What the website doesn't mention that other websites do is that this company went bankrupt. But he bounced back. Seven years after horseradish, a new company making tomato sauce. ketchup. Well, actually, initially it was catsup.
Starting point is 01:11:13 And then, yeah, it changed the ketchup, perhaps to distinguish itself from competitors. Al Bala writes, from here ketchup took on a uniquely American character and began to be shipped around the world and used in ways never imagined by its creators. Like so many other products, it became emblematic of American culture, quick, easy, convenient, and too sweet. but also adaptable to any gastronomic context and a bit addictive. Ketchup became the quick fix that seemed to make any dish perk up instantly from meat bowls to scrambled eggs. To a big bowl of pasta. Unbelievable.
Starting point is 01:11:53 Yeah, very offensive to Italians. So gross. But sometimes you need to bottom out, you know? You need a bottom out, hit rock bottom, and that's how you get yourself back on track. And you say offensive to Italians, they've only been using that for about five centuries at this point. That's true. That's a new fad for them. Yeah. Come on.
Starting point is 01:12:11 That is very true. Come on. I really have, I've hit rock bottom this week. And I think last night that was... That was evident. That was evident. That was evident. It's the wake-up call you needed.
Starting point is 01:12:21 Yeah. I'm going to lift off. On the way up now. Back on the up. Happy to be on this journey with you. Fantastic. You know, like watching you, not on it. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:12:30 I'm fucking thriving. Oh. Every day. No doubt. kicking goals. You are absolutely flying. Yeah. So Albella continues.
Starting point is 01:12:38 In a sense, it also became a mother sauce, meaning that one can concoct other sauces with ketchup as a base. Barbecue sauce usually uses ketchup, as does cocktail sauce for shrimp with the addition of horseradish. Think also of Russian dressing or Thousand Island or consider various recipes that are often ketchup laden, like meatloaf and chili. So it's become, it's a versatile dish. It's very, it's like, it's the mother sauce.
Starting point is 01:13:05 Yeah. Which is kind of ironic because Hans's mother's sauce was horseradish. Wow. If that is even a source. So horse radish should be the mother source. In an alternative reality, we're all just squirting horse radish on to wear pies. Meat pies. I keep thinking like Americans are like, oh, right.
Starting point is 01:13:27 What are you talking about? Yeah, because pies. We have a key lime pie with horseradish? What are you crazy? What have you? Savory. Savory pies. A meat pie.
Starting point is 01:13:36 Meat pie. Part of our culture. Four and twenty black beers baked into poor. Business boom for Heinz, and they started making many other condiments. Leading to what is apparently an iconic slogan of theirs. I'd never heard of it, I don't think. 57 varieties. Apparently they used to, it was a big advertising.
Starting point is 01:13:56 We make 57 varieties. No, I've never heard of that's too many. That's way too many. Which is funny as well, though, because even. Even back when it was thought up, like 100 odd years ago, they already were making more than 57 varieties. But they just like the number, apparently. It's too many, no, it's a dumb number and it's too many options. Apparently it's a combination of Henry and his wife's favourite numbers of 5 and 7.
Starting point is 01:14:19 That's one of the theories. Well, 75, that sounds, that's awful. That's too even. 57, it feels authentic, feels real, why would you make up 57? Australia's tomato sauce. I said Australia weird then, didn't I? No, Australia's. You said it like a Patriot.
Starting point is 01:14:36 What's that? That's start of a jingle or an ad. Australia is ready. Australia. It's ready right now. Australia. Your chicken is ready. Red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red, red.
Starting point is 01:14:53 I think I think I said it like that. Australia's tomato sauce sounds like it was first made in suburban kitchens in the 1800s. The exact details are on. known because it was just made privately and people the the mums at home weren't going oh you wouldn't believe what i got up to today they weren't blogging or anything not yeah not like mums today you're back then you kept it to yourself always bloody they're vlogging everything well no uh jess get ready with me to make tomato sauce you wouldn't get it why she puts her makeup on before she goes and does sauce jess dads can be mummy bloggers too now not on my watch mate
Starting point is 01:15:33 Delete, block. Block. Report. Offensive. It's offensive to my culture. Hate crime. Mummies. It's a hate crime.
Starting point is 01:15:46 The daddy vlogger, yuck. That's so, yeah. So, mums, it sounds like mums, probably nonas and mums and whatever. I think my grandma made her own tomato sauce. Like, it's still a thing like, not, you know, in these sort of surrounding suburbs, there's a lot. You see a lot of tomato. plants in front yards and they're harvesting to make big batches of bassada. Oh, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:16:09 I just have it in the garage. Yeah, yeah. It's a whole big day. But yeah, apparently the first to make tomato sauce in this sort of ketchupy Australian tomato sauce kind of way commercially was Rosella, which is still a big brand. Oh, probably my favourite of the straight up tomato sauce. Oh, there you go. Comes in the glass bottle.
Starting point is 01:16:28 Do you know where it began? In a Rosella. In Carlton, just a couple of suburbs away. Really? Yeah, in a backyard in 1895. The founder's HR McCracken and grocer named T.J. Press, started making jams and preserves. Pressing McCracken.
Starting point is 01:16:48 That's so good. Better than Rosella. They went with Rosella. We could have been Pressing McCracken sauce. Pressing McCracken. Pressing McCracken. Stop pressing McCracken. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:17:02 That's probably. And imagine, like, if they went with that, I reckon the squeezable bottle would have come about a lot quicker too. Yeah. Because it would have, you know, subliminally, the signs would have been there to move on from glass bottles to if I pressed this little crack, bit of I made it out of plastic. Yeah. Squeeze it out. No, they stay true.
Starting point is 01:17:23 They'll stay with glass. Oh, we had the Rosella glass bottles and I'd completely forgotten about until you said that. That is the classic. That's the one yet. Yeah. Yeah, I prefer a squeezy because you can't get it out a bit easier. I'm going to talk about when the squeeze he was invented, which is surprisingly recently. Something out of the glass, like that's the one in my fridge right now would be Rosela.
Starting point is 01:17:41 Should we talk about that? Fridge? I'm finishing with that. Okay, perfect, because I've got opinions. Okay, great. I think I'm literally finishing the report with that question, so hold fire. Or, I mean, you can sizzle it now if you want to tell us what you... Well, I've got that in my fridge, but do I agree with it?
Starting point is 01:17:57 Okay, well, let's find out. I've got the expert opinions. Uh, from McCracken? I think McCracken might be in the ground. What? What did I say it like that? What I say it like that? The Cracken had some real opinions and they had to put him down.
Starting point is 01:18:13 He's, uh, in the ground. He's, uh, sleeping with the fishes. This person who came up with this source in the 1800s is dead? Oh. So, yeah, they, they started up in Carlton. They soon opened a factory on Flinders Street. Wow. It's so fun of the thing of Flinders Street having factories on it.
Starting point is 01:18:30 Yeah. Not just like, uh, shops. selling small kangaroos. Yes. And bottle openers with kangaroo ball sacks on and stuff. That's like a very big, busy street in the CBD. Yeah, a big touristy sort of strip. Like it's got the most probably widely used train station.
Starting point is 01:18:47 Yes. Yeah. And then a lot of touristy knick-knacks. Yes. But also. An American chain fast food dearies. Yep. But also like the Forum Theatre?
Starting point is 01:18:57 Yes. Yeah. Also Fed Square. Of course. Oh, yeah. I'm not. I'm thinking of Swanson Street anyway. So that's...
Starting point is 01:19:05 Flinders. Yeah. There's not that many knick-knackeries on... There are some food places. But yeah, in that corner up Swanson, that's where they all are. But, yeah, Flinders, of course, got Young Jackson's... Exactly, right.
Starting point is 01:19:18 Home of Chloe, which we talked about in our artefax series. That's right, a beautiful portrait. Oh, yeah. Next time I'm on Flindel, I'm going to try to remember to figure out where this... Yeah, that is... Yeah, you can't really imagine now a factory being there. No. Hatteries.
Starting point is 01:19:33 There's a hattery. Yeah. Under the station. Yeah. There's a gym. There's that really long gym? A bit further down towards the aquarium. I'm in Banana Alley.
Starting point is 01:19:44 Yeah, the really long gym. In the vaults. What's the Doities 24-7 gym? It says, we never close. I don't think they even have a door. Which is ironic, you don't have a door. You don't have a gym. That's good stuff.
Starting point is 01:19:57 I'll write that down. Can I have that? Dave. That was actually quite funny. That was actually really funny, Dave. I don't think they've got out of a door. If we could edit it down, we need to, basically we take everything Dave does. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:20:10 And like they used to make ketchup, we just condense it. We condense it way, way down, add salt. And then I think we got something of value. I agree. So I speak for two hours and what do we get about eight seconds? Yeah. I mean, this is, we've listeneders probably figured this out, but we normally record for 24 hours. Edit it down.
Starting point is 01:20:31 This is the best bit. Believe it, this is the bits of it left in. This is the crem of the crem. A lot of the stuff that's handed it out is us going, oh, what else, what else? Ooh, ooh, ooh. Oh, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. Um, oh, oh, no, we lost it, no.
Starting point is 01:20:51 Oh, hang on, I should just read this reporter, right? Yeah. I'm just going to make a phone call. And then it's a 45 minute phone call. We'll leave that in. Yeah, leave it. It's good stuff. So, yeah, so the factory,
Starting point is 01:21:02 on Flinders Street and the CBD of Melbourne was opened in soon after and then the first commercial tomato, tomato sauce, tomato sauce was launched in 1890. In 1906, fountain brand tomato sauce followed, produced by WC. Douglas, a company in Surrey Hill, Sydney. Then over in New Zealand, these are just a few of the highlights. Yeah. It was a boom time. Over in New Zealand, their iconic brand Watties, which I hadn't heard of.
Starting point is 01:21:33 Have you heard of that? It was formed in hasties in the 1930s. I wasn't that that? What, what, waddy, what, what, what? I was fully with you for a second. I'm like, oh, was it? No, you're making fun of me. Do you not remember that red research?
Starting point is 01:21:48 I remember the get ready, the red red bit, but the before that. Australia. I don't remember that. The chicken is ready, Australia is ready right now. But yeah, according to Ernie Smith's writing for Atlas Obscura What is... I don't really tickled himself there. Iconic in New Zealand.
Starting point is 01:22:05 Cool. Which we're coming over to in January for the first ever time. Got some new shows on Wellington and Auckland, we are going to get some Watties. And they're very proud of their meat pies over there, Dave. They say they're better than Australian meat pies. I'll be trying with open... Pound for pound.
Starting point is 01:22:21 With an open heart. An open mouth. But apparently Wadis is really... loved over there and there was an ad at one point in which a man sings a song titled You'll never be a Kiwi till you love our what is sauce.
Starting point is 01:22:37 Wow. So you're really sort of That's the real test when you're going for New Zealand citizenship. Oh wow. What do you think of this? Oh, love it. Welcome in.
Starting point is 01:22:47 That's the only question. You're a Kiwi now. The wheat bicks, how many do you do? Yeah. Or, you know, yeah, the Vegemite. It's a hungry little, what do they? There's a few.
Starting point is 01:22:56 Happy little vegamats. A few of those ones that are like, you're Australian, if you're Australian, you'll buy our product. Yeah. And I go, oh, okay. Okay, well, I want to be Australian. I'd hate to not be Australian. Oh. I drove past the Vegermite factory yesterday, and the smell, it's on Vegemite way.
Starting point is 01:23:14 Wow. Makes sense. But the smell is... Coincidence? What a good spot for them to build? Yeah. Is that way they got the name from? It's very thick in the air, even, you know, into the car it was coming through.
Starting point is 01:23:24 I like it thick. Okay. And Vegemine? That's two today, dude. Mark it down, two laugh lines. You're crushing it. This is going to break some hearts. In the 90s, what he was bought out by American giant Heinz.
Starting point is 01:23:45 Oh, Hines, you fucking dog. Master Foods. I didn't realize Mars Foods was Australian. It didn't form as a company until 1945, and it was until the 50s. they produced their first product, which was, of course, their classic, bread and butter, cucumbers. What does that mean? I don't know.
Starting point is 01:24:05 But they soon brought out other products that, I don't know, one of these I know kind of what it is, but they're all oddly named roll mops, mint jelly, and musto. Musto. Mint jelly was another one that was like. You put that on one like pork chops? It was on like a, we put, it's good on lamb, but we'd put it on a roast beef as well. But yeah, that was just another, like, it was a piece of roast beef this big and then like mint jelly for me. Loved it. Get some sugar on us.
Starting point is 01:24:38 It was just getting through the meat. But yeah, roll mops is. Roll mops. And musto. Musto. Yeah, please let me know what those mean. I refuse to Google it. But yeah, when they finally got into tomato.
Starting point is 01:24:53 sauce, they changed the game. They were big, you know, they came late, but they, they came big. And they were the, yes. I found, it's pickled herring fillets, roll mops. Okay. Rolled into cylindrical shape, often around a savory filling. Okay. Pickled herring fillets.
Starting point is 01:25:12 These are the people that were positing themselves as the master of food. What was the other one? Musto. Musto. They started as, it was like after the war and they were a lot. A lot of immigrants coming over from European, Europe, you know, squeezed out from... Sort of the bottle. The bottle being Europe.
Starting point is 01:25:35 And, you know, they bring in their foods and stuff. So, Master Foods are, like, importing. They started off importing for all the new Australians, some of their food from back home, before starting to make their own. What's must-o? Well, I mean, it's just coming up with mustard. Oh. Because I've just talked in Master food.
Starting point is 01:25:53 musto so it just is because mass food mustard is is the king of the mustards you think of must well i think of mustard i think of the little master food food jars oh oh no oh dear then you don't think of a squeeze no i think of the little jars little jar okay yeah i'm trying to think of the brand that's in here now you've got the hot english mustard fantastic you've got what way sexy uh yes oh my god it's so hot and you got the the grain mustard you got the Australian mustard But yeah, they do, they've also got the squeezy bottles. And can I say this, they invented them. No.
Starting point is 01:26:30 The squeezy bottle? No, 97. Wow. 97. Well, that's why in my childhood was the glass bottles. Yes, they launched tomato and barbecue sauce and squeezy bottles. And this is according to their website, I've not double-checked this at all. Tomato sauce in a squeezy bottle?
Starting point is 01:26:46 The website asks, this was a first from Master Foods, a first for sauces and a first For Australia. Yes. Oh, wow. If that's true, is that a fun fact? That we invented, we as a nation, invented squeezy bottles. In 1997. Yes, that's a fun fact.
Starting point is 01:27:04 Yes. That's delightfully fun. Yeah. Or are they saying that they invented them for Australia. Oh, first in Australia. Which is a way less impressive fact. To do it. I mean, it's impressive to a degree, but not to our international audience.
Starting point is 01:27:19 No, that don't give a shit. But if it was, if we invented them, you would have assumed. that they'd talk about it like they do about the Victor Mower and the Hills Hoist. Like every couple of years there's an ABC doco. I mean the fucking, the Sydney 2011 was just lawn mowers and
Starting point is 01:27:37 Hills Hoist and Tadogs. Yeah, where were the squeezy models? Yeah. And the world audience going, what? What's happening here? We're going, we don't have a lot of culture, okay? Okay. I mean, apart from the world's longest
Starting point is 01:27:50 existing. existing civilization, which... Going back 60,000 plus years. Yes. But apart from that, we've got squeezy bottles. And we included about 30 seconds of that. So let us have our lawnmowers on our hills, hoists and tap dogs. We trained a bunch of dogs.
Starting point is 01:28:07 Yeah. There were dogs, weren't there? Were there dogs? No. There were people on horses with whips, so that's fun. Was Dame Edna probably was there? Probably. Midnight oil played.
Starting point is 01:28:17 Did they? They played beds burning wearing their sorry tracksuits. Ah, wow. Because our Prime Minister at the time refused to say sorry to the Indigenous people And they were like, what the, why? Yeah. Just say it. Say sorry.
Starting point is 01:28:29 We were fucked. Yeah. The least we can do is apologize. It's really like, it's not much. Hectic. So the website also writes, if you didn't think the squeezy bottles was enough, they also write, did you know, the Master Food squeeze on sauce packet you might use on a pie? That's also a world-first.
Starting point is 01:28:54 No! What? I love to see TikToks of tourists in Australia, and they're, like, so excited about those squeezy sauce packets. It makes me feel very proud. Because they've heard of them, have they? No, but they're just like, this is so smart. It makes so much sense.
Starting point is 01:29:08 Oh, rather than having a little sashet that you're ripping you get sauce everywhere. Yeah. Or on your hands. Yeah, what I call Heinz technology. Faulty Heinz technology. Agreed. Or just having a loose bottle. Yeah, more like B. Heinz in technology.
Starting point is 01:29:20 Yeah. Thank you, Jess. Hi-Fi. Three today. That's where they get... He's outrageous. They're finally the master and master foods. Yes.
Starting point is 01:29:29 But yeah. I can't believe that that is... That suggests that the other thing was also a world first. I said that's also a world first. Yeah. So maybe the squeezy bottles... But that seems... Ninety-seven.
Starting point is 01:29:40 Ninety-seven seems late for someone to go, hang on a second. Have you heard of plastic? It's also probably led to increasing... landfill and stuff. But anyway, the glass bottle, that's right, Rosella. So true. We're getting towards the end. I know this is going to make you sad, but I didn't realize this,
Starting point is 01:30:00 but Heinz apparently has had a long campaign trying to convert Australians to ketchup from tomato sauce. In 1991, an article in Food Australia wrote, Heinz tomato ketchup marketing manager, Martin Dowling, said that Australians need to be educated that tomato ketchup is different. It's not tomato sauce with an amount. American name, which of course, so funny that took me 34 years more, and this report to write for me to know what he was trying to teach us back in 91.
Starting point is 01:30:30 It's funny to me that we are sticking fat on tomato sauce over ketchup when so much American culture, you know, has bled into Australia. But apparently it's one of the big motivators. Like, not in, not in Australia. I'm not having bloody ketchup. American while I'm watching American movies on, like, everything else in my life is quite American. It's not a sidewalk, it's a footpath.
Starting point is 01:30:53 Okay. You've... Oh. Yes. That triggers you? No, that's... Yes, yes. You're on to something.
Starting point is 01:31:02 No what? Hell yeah, sister. No, you just pre-quoted Scotty Cam. I'm about to quote him. He said almost exactly that. Of course he did, because Scotty Cam's just like every other boomer dad. Okay. So, Ernie Smith writes,
Starting point is 01:31:17 Hines his efforts to sell the Australian public. on ketchup, have at times been seen as something of an affront on Australian identity, especially as, starting in 2010, the company started advertising ketchup on television. Famed Australian entrepreneur, Dick Smith, who created a lot of Australian products to compete with Australian products that have been sold to overseas companies. There's some classic, like dickheads instead of redhead matches. Yeah, he had his own peanut butter. Yeah, his own...
Starting point is 01:31:49 Compete with craft. Because Vegemite was salt, but Vegemite's something by Australians again. Doesn't matter. Doesn't know. He's with electronics because electronics were American. He made a tomato sauce called Aussie sauce. But yeah,
Starting point is 01:32:03 he was a big critic saying they don't give us stuff about Australian culture or our way of life. He's talking to this Sunday Telegraph. They've basically said, if we have one common label and call it ketchup all around the world, that's the best way we can make money, which is totally true. They're just like,
Starting point is 01:32:18 please just start having ketchup so we don't have. to keep, because they make... Oh, second labels. Or second product. Well, they make a second product in Australia called Big Red Tomato Sauce. That's right. And they're like, come on, just get in a ketchup so we don't have to keep making this stupid other thing.
Starting point is 01:32:33 It'll save us money. Ernie Smith continues, we're such a small market that. You wonder why they even give a shit. Yeah, why do you care so much? Leave us alone. Ernie Smith continues. For Australians, it seems, ketchup is an Americanism in a country that has seen its fair share of American culture bleed in already, which, I mean, they should start the campaign with.
Starting point is 01:32:55 It's actually China. It's very global ketchup. It's, you know, it's got its roots everywhere. No, we'd hate that. We wanted to be true blue. Yeah. This is true blue Aussie sauce invented right here. I thought I'm making it blue. And the other, the funny thing is that it's, it's a, like, it really, you know, we split off from ketchup right at the end a little bit, you know. Yeah. Get history before that goes back a lot of time. Yeah. But Smith continues.
Starting point is 01:33:24 In a similar vein, Australian television personnel, Scott Cam worried that the term tomato sauce would be replaced by ketchup, saying, what are we going to start walking down the sidewalk? Cam said, referencing that Australians instead say footpath. They're infiltrating us. It's not our way of law. It's so funny that you... That was your first go-to.
Starting point is 01:33:46 Of course it was. You and Scotty Cam, lockstep. Yeah, always have been. Interestingly, as you will be aware, Heinz baked beans are huge in Australia. Beans means Heinz. Yeah. It's probably, would it be the biggest baked beans brand?
Starting point is 01:34:01 Oh, probably. Yeah, you see that one on SPC a lot. Oh, yes, SBC, which was an Australian brand. Baked beans and spaghetti for hungry little human beings or something like that. Heinz baked beans are big in Australia, but Smith writes, ketchup seems to be a much harder sell. In 2012, the company closed its Australian ketchup.
Starting point is 01:34:18 It's a ketchup factory after 70 years of existence and moved its production to New Zealand. In a final indignity, the Australian Broadcasting Corporation reported the news as, quote, Heinz Tomato Sauce Factory closes. So they didn't say ketchup factory? That's so funny. Why are we so petty about it? But they probably were just like, like me, they just think they're interchangeable terms. But it is funny, this American article writing about it sees that as.
Starting point is 01:34:48 the final indignity. It was a slap. You fucking dogs. But yeah, it's crazy how many rabbit holes you can go down. Yeah. This really could have been, I could have done nine episodes on this topic for Block. Here's a few quick ones that I found interesting. Like in the Philippines, banana ketchup is big.
Starting point is 01:35:08 Wow. Oh, where did I have banana ketchup not long ago? Bahamas. Maybe it was them Bahamas. And I really, really liked it. Oh, interesting. What was your impression of it? It was like slightly sweeter, but no, I'm trying to think where I was.
Starting point is 01:35:24 And I actually thought, I want to buy this. Was it yellow? No, it was red. It was just like a red sauce. So it's, yeah, one. Well, what was they having? I had it like quite a bit. Why would they make it red?
Starting point is 01:35:34 I guess they're trying to make it seem basically like. Still like a ketchup. Oh, you know, it was in Bali. Ah. Yeah, the sauce that would come with the chips of the hotel, I think, I had, yeah, banana ketchup. Yeah, there you go. Or banana sauce. I imagine it would probably be thicker, right?
Starting point is 01:35:50 Like, because just banana texture is a lot thicker than a tomato. Yeah, it went really well. According to Eubank, who, so Eubank's written an article where she went around trying. The bank? She went around. Did I have better interest than my current bank? She tried a bunch of different ones and she tried banana ketchup. But she says that its invention is often attributed to Maria Orosa, a,
Starting point is 01:36:18 trailblazing food scientists and chemists who spent decades studying and teaching food preservation in the Philippines. You bank tried out some saying it had an almost jelly-like texture, a bright red colour and a bold banana flavour. Both the colour and the banana flavour are artificial
Starting point is 01:36:34 according to the ingredients list, neither of which stops it from being a fun condiment for fries and famously spaghetti. Apparently... That's what you needed. Yeah, I needed the old banana sauce. Not just a fucking tomato sauce. That's great. That's it. That's fast.
Starting point is 01:36:48 What brand were you having? With your tomato sauce on the spaghetti? Master foods last night. Masser foods, okay. With a bit of salt and pepper. It's like a, like, I really, I don't have like a brand, I don't generally don't really have brand loyalty for stuff like that, I don't think. It's just like, they all look basically the same.
Starting point is 01:37:07 Master Foods did invent that squeezable bottle, apparently. Yeah. But a lot of them have followed suit. Of course. So, you know, I'm just grabbing. Whatever. Whatever. Willie-nilly.
Starting point is 01:37:17 You don't even look at. prices you just fucking run your arm along a shelf and say all over that thanks yeah you're crazy man well i would say i didn't want to sound like a tired ass but i probably would just pick the whatever's on special but now i'd now i can see you two looking down your nose is that me uh you bank also spoke about curry sauce in germany uh writing curry ketchup is mostly tomato base it's glammed up though with the addition of curry powder the story goes that in 1949 a snack bar owner in Berlin named Herta Huah mixed up a tomato sauce, laced it with curry powder. Laced is such a fun way to put that, as well as Worcestershire sauce and served it with sausages.
Starting point is 01:38:00 Some visitors of some versions of the story also hold that she received those ingredients as food rations or traded them with a British soldier in return for some booze. The sauce became so popular that Huah was able to patent it and today sausages with curry ketchup are an iconic street food in Germany. Oh, yeah, actually, yeah, that's right. Yum. This last thing, I've seen this map, a few, have you seen this map, this British map, map of the UK?
Starting point is 01:38:31 I have seen a map of the UK, yeah. But it's split up by what they put on their chips. No. There's one that's really intricate and it's got heaps of different bits, but all the comments are always like, oh, that's not right. So I didn't go with that one. I went with one on ugov.com.com. UK. So I think it's like quite an official government research project. I'm glad they're doing
Starting point is 01:38:52 the research that really matters. Yeah. And it says that tomato ketchup is very popular in the UK too and the Heinz bottle is what's used to symbolise it there. So I think that's like a big brand over there. Especially, you know, when it's talking about a condiment for hot chips or fries as as Americans would say, it comes in second after salt and vinegar and then ketchup very, very popular but there's also some interesting distinct regional taste according to the website London loves mayonnaise there's like 20 some percent Scotland loves something called brown sauce Wales is in a curry sauce and northerners I think I'm with the northerners into gravy chips and gravy yeah chips and gravy so good that's really good I haven't had that in a long time
Starting point is 01:39:40 from like a charcoal chicken shop yeah oh yeah there's spoon it over the top So good. Oh, delicious. Yeah. So like I, you go around the world and there's all these variations. But I'm going to finish with pantry or fridge. Okay, okay. Pantry or fridge.
Starting point is 01:39:56 A great question. Dave. Do you keep your sauce cold or room temperature? If you, I can tell you mine if you like. Go on. I'm a fridge man. Chocolate's the same, which is probably more controversial, but I'll opt for fridge nearly all the, for most things, I'd say. Everything's in the fridge.
Starting point is 01:40:15 the fridge. I grew up as a pantry for chocolate and sauce, and now I'm a fridge. Oh my gosh, that's the same. Is that because of partner influence? I think so. Yeah, growing up, it was very much everything's in the pantry, jams in the pantry, tomato sauce in the pantry, like you said, chocolate as well. But now my wife was very insisted on keeping it all refrigerated. She's like, that's what, like it says on the bottle, refrigerate after opening. But there's something About cold sauce on a hot pie, I'm not like, I like when you get like from the shop, the little squeezy master food things that they invented because it's like room temperature. I like that better.
Starting point is 01:40:54 But I also do see that maybe it keeps the sauce longer. I'm starting to enjoy cold chocolate more. I love the crispiness of the snap, especially those thin chocolates or crispy. But I think block I find it harder to snap along the row. It is harder to snap the row. So you end up with four and you go, oh no, I've got four pieces instead of two. How terrible. But living in a warm place means that if you leave chocolate in the pantry, it can be melty.
Starting point is 01:41:21 Yeah, melty chocolate's not good. Not good. I'll admit that. But yeah, the sauce is in the fridge now. And sauce that gets too warm. Like, have you ever had like a, like as a kid, I remember having one of those little sauce packets and it opened a bit in my bag, was left, school bag left there over the holidays or something. It was disgusting.
Starting point is 01:41:40 Yeah, yuck. So I wouldn't do that either. No. Pantry, fridge or school bag. I think I might have gone on a similar journey. I can't remember the pantry, but I reckon my parents do keep sauce in the pantry. And this is consistent with the research.
Starting point is 01:42:00 So you were influenced by your parents probably growing up and now by your younger partners. True. It's true. Because you're both cradle snatches. Rebecca Scanlan writes for news.com.com. A.U. Ross Mail, head of research and development for Master Foods, inventors of the Squeezy bottle, asterix, you know, research pending.
Starting point is 01:42:23 I said there's only one place in our homes that the iconic red bottles of sauce belong. I started working on the recipes for Master Foods products over 15 years ago and liked to pride myself on knowing a thing or two about sauce. As Australians' favourite tomato sauce, we can finally set. That or the debate, Master Foods will always recommend keeping it in the fridge. Okay, Ross Mail. This helps to keep its quality so that it tastes and looks fresher for longer. The colder temperature will also help slow down the aging process,
Starting point is 01:42:54 keeping it brighter red in colour and a strong tomato flavour. Well, I like it a bit brown and vinegary. I'm making brown sauce. Is that the Scots just like, do they just get ketchup and it's all? It's just off. It's not all bad news for those who prefer it in the cupboard, Mr. Mail said, explaining the culprits who keep their ketchup in the pantry. See, she's, I like she's switching ketchup and tomato sauce.
Starting point is 01:43:22 That's what I would do. It's all the fucking same. Because especially when you're writing out a long thing, you don't want to keep saying the same word again. So you look for similes or whatever. Synonyms. People were about to yell their iPods then. Yeah, they were like, oh, me tweet.
Starting point is 01:43:36 Oh, my say the wrong thing. Ah, idiot. But, yeah, Mr. Mail, he says that, yeah, keep it in the pantry. You're not going to suffer harmful consequences. It's more like a taste thing. Technically, tomato sauce is shelf stable, given its ingredients, includes salt and sugar, which are natural preservatives, he said. It's on a shelf in just a regular aisle in the shop.
Starting point is 01:43:57 Yes, that's when it's sealed. So that, talking about once it's opened, after it's sealed at the factory, it can be stored in the cupboard until it's open. However, once you've cracked open a new bottle and exposed, it to air, it will age more quickly, turning dark brown and not being as tomatoy. Yeah, but he's like the head of marketing. He wants you to eat it all in one sitting so you buy a new box. Yeah, just squeeze it straight into your mouth.
Starting point is 01:44:20 But it's also interesting that he, yeah, maybe there is research saying if it's in the fridge, though, you'll be more likely to sit and use it. But if he would be happy for it to go off and you have to buy a new one as well, I'm actually now thinking, I think the tomato sauce is on the pantry at the moment and the sweet chili is in the fridge. But that is more a question of space in the fridge. It's a small fridge. Yeah, okay.
Starting point is 01:44:41 The Aussie food manufacturer, like I said, launched in 1945, also revealed some new data from its 2024 study that exposed source storage preferences are dependent on age and gender. Young Aussies are firm believers in keeping their tomato sauce in the fridge, with 58% of Gen Z and millennials opting to serve it chilled, Master Food said. However, nearly half of baby boomers prefer it in the cupboard, the research found.
Starting point is 01:45:06 Nearly half. I missed that detail, so less than half. Still a minority. Yeah. And about the same, because it wasn't a 50-something of... 58%. Yeah, they've talked that up a bit more than I thought. Because I was like, that makes sense.
Starting point is 01:45:21 All our parents, maybe were cupboards and we're fridge. But you're, I mean, you're beyond boomers. I don't think they have a name for your generation. Well, you know, you won't get this. The past. But I grew up pre-fidges. So I, I'm not going to take. take them for granted.
Starting point is 01:45:38 That's right. I used to have to keep things in a wet sack. The cool guard, are you safe? I literally was talking about this last night with my parents. I said, can I ask us potentially patronising question? Did you have fridges when you were growing up? And they said, how dare you? No, they didn't.
Starting point is 01:45:56 They said, yes, we had fridges. And we were talking about the cool, got a fridge. That's crazy. Did you have steam trains? Yeah, I was like, what are you? Finally, I thought it would be nice to finish with some common ground between these two very different products of ketchup and tomato sauce. That's great.
Starting point is 01:46:11 If you don't know, they're made of tomatoes, vinegar, salt, a few herbs and spices. Secret herbs and spices. Very different things. One is thicker and sweeter and the other is thinner and more vinegiery. But some common ground, Hines in 2023 tweeted, FYI, ketchup. Full stop goes, full stop in, full stop, the full stop. fridge triple exclamation mark
Starting point is 01:46:39 Whoa Why do you think someone Like was They'd just been fired From the social media That's it I'm just gonna say it I'm releasing the files
Starting point is 01:46:48 Yeah So a little nice coming ground To finish there That's beautiful Was it Did you find that to be a surprising history Yeah Yeah
Starting point is 01:46:59 Yeah I didn't know anything about Like the fact that I think I also probably Pretty recently found out That they're different things but I didn't know that, yeah. Did you know Katsop and ketchup were the same? I had no idea about that.
Starting point is 01:47:11 I thought that was just a Simpsons joke. I didn't know Katsop was a thing. I thought, I assumed Katsop was some American other sauce. Yeah. It's just the same. The fact that ketchup, it's not just tomato. It didn't start that way anyway. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:47:25 That was interesting. Surprisingly interesting. Well, thank you so much to Yumi and Skum Pig for suggesting it. I forgot about Skull Pig. Which were, you know, I don't know how many. It would have been thousands. People wanted sauce slash ketchup. Well, that brings us to everyone's favorite section of the show.
Starting point is 01:47:45 Jess, do you need to move your car? I do have to move my car, but I could sing the jingle for you first if you want. Oh, yeah, great. Why don't I do that? I'm like, that bit's minutes away. But I could get to that quicker than normal. Yeah, geez, that'd be fucking nice. Well, this is everyone's favorite section of the show.
Starting point is 01:48:00 Does everything else pretty quick, if you know what I mean. It gets there pretty quick in a lot of other ways, let me tell you. Can you expand on that? I don't think you want me to, mate. I'd really love to be on the same page as you. I don't want to reveal too much of our personal life. You already have. I'm so confused right now.
Starting point is 01:48:19 Just sing the damn song. So this first thing, this is where we thank great supporters. If you want to be one of these supporters, go to Patreon.com slash do you go on pod, link in the show notes. And there's a bunch of different levels you can be on. Get bonus episodes. You get ad free feed. We're now filming the episodes for the most part, and you get those in your, yeah, if you're on the Dreamboat Cooper level or above. You get to see us and go, whoa, they're funny and hot.
Starting point is 01:48:50 You get to be like Swamp Pig or whoever and directly suggest things into the block pole. A lot of great things, a lot of fun, Facebook group, et cetera, et cetera. Get to tickets in advance, all that sort of thing, discount codes. But the first thing we do for people on the city, Schaumburg level or above, they get to give a fact, a quote, or a question in a section of the show we call fact quote a question. I think as a jingle even. Go something like this. Fact quote or question.
Starting point is 01:49:19 That's it. He always remembers the ding. She always remembers the sing. Now, while Jess pops off to... And moves the car. Wow, she's on fire now. It's my ass. Dave, can I read some to you?
Starting point is 01:49:37 And if, you know, on the off chance that they reference Jess, we can come back to her. But first one comes from Jocelyn Kravitz. I wonder if there's any relation. To Jocelyn. Yeah. There are no famous Jocelyns. Oh, your friend Jocelyn.
Starting point is 01:49:57 My friend Jocelyn. In relation? I don't know. We'll have to ask. Okay. Is there, was there a, there was a famous singer called Joss someone. Joss Stone. Joss Stone, maybe short for Jocelyn's.
Starting point is 01:50:12 Maybe. Anyway, Jocelyn Cravitz. It's short for Jocelyn. And Jocelyn, you also get to give yourself a title. Jocelyn's title is Nosey Nelly. And Jocelyn asks a question, writing, have you ever been on a blind date? If so, how did it go?
Starting point is 01:50:30 I have not I know I'm so sorry to disappoint you I haven't been no we'll ask Jess we'll ask Jess surely someone's blindfolded Jess and pushed her into a restaurant Jolson writes
Starting point is 01:50:44 I've been on one blind date because we always encourage if you're writing a question I'm glad you've got something to give us it was in 1997 I almost didn't go because I knew the boyfriend of the person who set us up
Starting point is 01:50:55 and well that didn't fill me with confidence about a judgment of what makes a guy smart, cute and funny, none of which her boyfriend was. But I hadn't been on a date in a while, so we met for coffee. We celebrated our 24th wedding anniversary last month.
Starting point is 01:51:15 Yes! That is the best. What a reveal. That's a great reveal. I genuinely thought this was, and I thought it was going to be, and I was wrong. Yeah, that's right.
Starting point is 01:51:25 He was terrible. But it turns out he was a hunk. Yeah. Just one, small letter changes. Wow, that is so awesome. Happy 24th. 97, that's also means it's about the 24 anniversary of the Squeezy bottle. If true.
Starting point is 01:51:43 Do you think that they had Squeezzy sauce on their table? Oh, my God. I would hope so. We'll ask Jess about if she had a blind date when she gets back. But the next one comes from Matthew Whittingham, who I met at a Brisbane who knew it show. Oh, great. And I know that he is like an opera singer or something. Oh, that's impressive.
Starting point is 01:52:06 Yeah. I think he's, there's a play that he's about to do, which is about like a plane crash and monkeys or something. Be heard of that? A plane crash with monkeys. It's called like, and it's the 9-11s involved? Doesn't matter. A plane crash with monkeys.
Starting point is 01:52:22 Maybe not. I don't know the story, but. If there is monkeys involved. It's called something like, long time away. Oh, come from away. Oh. That's a famous. famous musical. I didn't know I had monkeys.
Starting point is 01:52:32 Maybe it doesn't. Oh, because if it... If it does... If you're like, oh, apes. Because if it does, that'd be the great thing for you to review. Yes. Well, if it does, yeah, I should really do an episode on it. Jess, have you ever been on a blind date?
Starting point is 01:52:48 No. Okay, neither had we. Yeah, no, we were disappointing, but it turns out that Jocelyn, who wrote the question in, did in 1997. And she... Almost didn't go? Because the guy, the woman who set it up, her boyfriend, sucked and she's like he's got she's got bad taste in men right he's he's dull he's not smart he's not cute he's not funny um so i don't trust her thing but i hadn't been on a day for a while
Starting point is 01:53:13 so we met up for coffee and we just celebrated our 24th wedding anniversary that's nice it was awesome that's nice great reveal it was a great reveal uh just not as excited but she hates love uh the next one i hate love i don't think anybody should be in it next one comes from Matthew Whittingham, Jess. Okay. You don't want to ask any further questions about mine. No, I agree with you. Sure.
Starting point is 01:53:38 Whose title is Spell Checker for the Do-Go-On Book of Magic Spells. It's abracadabra, not abracadabro. Okay. Oh, thank God. Thank God. Under a fact-quoted question, Matthew writes, an anecdote that includes a fact and technically a quote, a fanatic quote. Wow.
Starting point is 01:53:55 Wow. Perhaps. There's a lot going on. For anyone who doesn't know, the dating app hinge lets you choose written prompts that you complete to give people an insight into your personality or some shit. I was recently browsing through Hinge and came across a profile where all her answers were written in German, presumably a tourist who had decided to come to Northern New South Wales instead of somewhere good like Sydney. I couldn't understand any of what she had written, but one of her answers caught my attention.
Starting point is 01:54:23 The prompt displayed in English as, quote, if I'm cooking, it's going to be dot, dot, dot. And she wrote, race, spelled R-E-I-S. This is for the benefit of the listeners. I could tell this was a joke answer and wanted to know the punchline, so I put into Google Translate and it turns out, rice is the German word for rice. If I'm cooking, it's going to be rice. I would have liked to match with her,
Starting point is 01:54:55 but I don't think we would have had much to talk about. So he thought it was going to be like, If I'm cooking, it's going to be bad. Yeah, yeah. But it's, I'm probably rice. Okay. Great, yeah. You can't, I don't think you can.
Starting point is 01:55:10 I had a bit in my stand-up show a couple of years ago about, because I met my now husband in person, but I have seen the photos that he had chosen for his Tinder profile and some of the things he's written and I would never have swiped on him, you know. I think you showed me it really much. made me love. Yeah. I was like this creepy photo of him and then the thing that he'd written underneath was
Starting point is 01:55:36 they'll all pay for what they did. That's so good. It's good because you know him. But the photo's kind of like, almost Mr. Burns, like hands together evil in my memory. Like, he-ha-ha-ha-ha-thal-pay.
Starting point is 01:55:51 That's psycho-behavior. But that's so funny to put as your front footboard. Is it? I don't think it was very successful. And, well, I would say also, Matthew, that Jocelyn didn't have, didn't think that her date was going to be too much to write home about. Yeah. And it led to marriage. Well, it doesn't mean it's good.
Starting point is 01:56:14 Well, I think, I think it sounds. 24 years of marriage. I don't know, just something about. Torrible. Oh, no. To be honest, she did finish that sentence with a full stop. We celebrated 24 years. We celebrated our anniversary last month.
Starting point is 01:56:27 Yeah. Yeah, no, good point. The next one comes from Zoe D.L. A.K. Frog care of the podcast, Yoda and Jabba Say Hi. Now, I met Zoe at a few shows in Sydney. I wonder if Zoe would be coming to our upcoming show. Oh, I hope so. I hope so. We can be at a new venue.
Starting point is 01:56:45 It's going to be a lot of fun. My question is, what is your go-to karaoke song? To answer my question, which we always suggest. Mine is Cosby Sweater. I learnt the lyrics when I was 16 and they're still in my brain enough that I can impress all the girlies. at Hensnights with the lines like, I won't beat around the bush like it's a 70s porn. Nice.
Starting point is 01:57:04 It's great because I don't have to actually sing. Oh, good half. Yeah, smart. Oh, because it's hip-hop. Yeah. Sort of like the tomato source of hip-hop, if you know what I mean. They've got ketchup. We've got hilltop hoods.
Starting point is 01:57:21 Yeah. Go-to karaoke song is 9 to 5. Dolly pardon. Absolutely classic. Mine is George Michael Kales Whisper. It's a great one. I love it. It does go for about five minutes.
Starting point is 01:57:34 Worth it. I don't know if I've a go-to, but last time I did it, I did turn the page by Bob Seeger and the Silver Bullet Band. Oh. And that was an option at karaoke. Yeah. I'm sure. Would I be recognising anything if I heard the start?
Starting point is 01:57:48 The first version I heard of it was Metallica from that covers album. It was a single off that, so you might not from that. But it was a pretty faithful sort of cover. But yeah, I don't think it went down very well And it was at the end of a big night And my voice was struggling And I don't have a great one to begin with So it probably would have been a bit rough to listen to
Starting point is 01:58:09 But yeah, Johnny Cash in the past Oh yeah, you'd kill those Yeah, good, good questions though Zoe Let's do a karaoke night sometime Next time we're out and tour Do you remember once we did one in Brisbane That Goxie hosted at Good Chat Oh, Lee Kernick and I did
Starting point is 01:58:26 You did Kirks and I did Keros Whisper. Yeah. That was so good. Let's definitely do one around in the road. That would be so fun. Thank you so much to Zoe Matthew and Jocelyn for your facts and quotes and your questions. Like I say, if you want to get involved in that section of the show, and you can be on pretty regularly, you know, go to the Patreon and sign up on the Sydney-Shaunberg level. We dare you.
Starting point is 01:58:49 Double dare you. Now, the next section of the show, we shout out a few of our other great supporters and just normally comes up with a bit of a game based on something. the topic. What are you thinking today, Bopper? Let's see if there is a condiment generator. Oh, great one. Yes, there is. Excellent. Everyone's getting a condiment. What about if we say this condiment, you get a lifetime free supply for the rest of your life of this source. Love that. Okay, great. And it's going to be at random, is that right? Yeah, it's a random condiment generator. Oh my God.
Starting point is 01:59:25 All right, Dave, you want to go one for one? I'd love to. First of all, I'd like to thank you from a location that is unknown to us, technically, but we have met this person in real life before. Yes. They are probably dwelling in the Fortress of the Moles. That is a big thank you, and hello to Alana Shooting Star. Alana.
Starting point is 01:59:41 Aalana. We know Alana, and we love Alana. Thanks so much for supporting the show. You're a legend. Lana for a little while ran the room around the corner, which Raywin now runs. Oh, Miss Moses. Miss Moses. But back then it was Bruce.
Starting point is 01:59:55 Lab comedy, I think. Ah, back in the day. How about that? How about that? How about it? Fun gig. Alana, excitingly, has a lifetime supply of salsa. That's a great one.
Starting point is 02:00:06 That's a good one. Yes. Delicious. I'll take that. Great. What are you going? Mild, medium, hot. I'll probably go medium because it's, you know, it can do it all.
Starting point is 02:00:15 Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You can spice it up, but you can... Spice it down. You could add some sour cream and bring it down a bit, too. Yes. I think I'm with you. I probably...
Starting point is 02:00:24 Yeah, I've probably... I probably started mild as a kid. Yes. Then medium, I'd probably go hot now. You know, as my taste buzz, die. You want to feel something. Yeah. At his age.
Starting point is 02:00:35 You know, I just want to feel like I'm tasting something. I think I can taste something. Yeah, I can, yeah, no, I like it. Yeah. Like that. As they, you know, put it in a tube straight into my stomach. Yeah. You go, oh, yummy.
Starting point is 02:00:48 Num-n-num. So thanks so much, Alana. Matt, do you want me to do another one? I would love you to do another one. I would like to thank from a location that it's also unknown to us. That means they haven't given us to their address, which means that they won't get a Christmas card, but maybe you don't want one. That's okay. That's all right.
Starting point is 02:01:00 Thank you to Paula. Paula's getting a lifetime supply of guacamole. Oh, yes. If you team up with Alana, that's already a meal. Yeah. Holy guacamole. You guys are crushing it. Holy guac and salsa.
Starting point is 02:01:14 Have we talked about this before? Is whackamol meant to be a pun on guacamole? Oh my gosh. It should be whackamoli. I think, no, I think guacamole is a play on whackamole. That should be guacamole. So thanks, Paula. Hey, I'm on fire here.
Starting point is 02:01:31 I'm going to shout out to a third person if you don't mind. Oh, please. From a location that is also, also unknown to us. Big shout out and thank you to Josh Lowry or Josh Lory. Josh is getting some Chooksbury mustard. Okay, getting quite specific there. Yeah, what does that mean? I looked it up.
Starting point is 02:01:47 It's a town in England. Ooh, Chooksbury. Josh, you've got a lifetime supply. Enjoy that. Enjoy that. Delish. John, I did to a few? Yeah, jump in, three for three.
Starting point is 02:01:57 Well, I'd love to thank from Dick Smoody in B.E. Was that Belgium? Yeah, but thanks for describing me there. Dix Moody. Is that right, Belgium? It is Belgium. You're looking up a pronunciation guard? No, I'm just making sure it is Belgium, and it is West Flanders in Belgium.
Starting point is 02:02:15 Thank you so much to Massachai, I. Who's got a lifetime supply of steak sauce. Oh, very specific. Can you put a steak? sake sauce on a non-stake. Apps are fucking lootly not. Oh, okay. You will explode.
Starting point is 02:02:27 Geez, there was a long time to find out what you were firmly for or against there. My face and tone weren't giving you any clues? No. I was also strapping in for the journey. Am I exciting? Yes. Is it a scary way? Are I riding a bucking bronco every time I talk to you.
Starting point is 02:02:44 Whoa. Talk to me. Okay. Writing a bucking bronco. Bonco. Baking bonker. Matt said Dick's a dick's move. Apparently, Wikipedia has a pronunciation, so listen.
Starting point is 02:02:57 Dix Maudin. Dix Maudin. Dix Maudin. Dix Maudin. Does that, really, it sounds like an Aussie guy saying that. Dix Mauden. Dix Mauden. Yeah, it sounds like an Aussie guy doing it badly.
Starting point is 02:03:09 You got Jim's Mowen, you got Dix Mowden. To all the greats. From address, unknown, again, issuing from deep within the fortress of the Moles. Please and thank you to Brie, surname, based on the email address. It starts with B might be a colour. Oh, a couple options there. And Brie's spelled BRW and surname spell notes. And Bray's got a lifetime supply of AOLI.
Starting point is 02:03:36 Oh, yes. Great with fries. Possibly the one that I'd pick if I could. Yeah, I agree. No, not me. Don't like AOLI? Nah, tomato sauce. Yeah.
Starting point is 02:03:44 I'm always, I'm like, why have they? Yeah, I'm, I'm... You're old. Old. Yeah. Yeah. It's okay. But AOL, I remember it AOLi became the popular thing,
Starting point is 02:03:53 15, 20 years ago, I'm like, put it in the bin. Is it a fad? It's fine, but it is. It's like, it's not tomato sauce. Sure. My favorite sauce is probably, my favorite dipping sauce.
Starting point is 02:04:07 I love the Chipotle sauce that they put on stuff at Zambreros, but I also, my favorite is the grilled. I don't know, it's just gone out of my head. What's called? Oh my God. While you're thinking gravy,
Starting point is 02:04:21 just make everything gravy. It's got to be hot. Oh, though I think gravy, don't you reckon? Oh, yeah, a warm gravy. Can't be a cold gravy. Yuck. One of the grilled dipping sauces? Yeah, but which one?
Starting point is 02:04:30 I can't think of it. Your gravy is ready. Grilled, I haven't thought about grilled in a while. That also feels like, I put that in the same. Herbed mayo. I love it. I put that in the same group as AOLI as a thing. It used to be very popular.
Starting point is 02:04:46 Yeah, and that's too young for you. Yes. So it's too young and it's still past. Yeah, exactly. Is grilled still going? Yeah. And there's the... Herbed mayo is very good.
Starting point is 02:04:58 It's really good. I quite like this sweet chili mayo from... From Schnitz, but it does give me acid reflux, but it's worth it. Worth it? What a sacrifice. All right, I've got another good one here. Okay, I'd love to thank from Anstead in Queensland here in Australia, Casey Vesperman. Casey, lifetime supply of salt. That's actually a good one.
Starting point is 02:05:24 Oh, welcome to plane. That's a good one. That is a real Rook-N-M-R-R-N-A-K-N-A-K-N-A-K-N-A kind of. Huge. Lifetime supply of salt. I know. Enjoy. Yeah.
Starting point is 02:05:35 It goes with everything. Especially if you're living in a place that is susceptible to snow. Very helpful. Get a part-time job. Hey, I'll do the final three here. Thank you so much from a location that is also unknown to us. It's Katie, spelled K-A-I-T-I-E. Katie has got a,
Starting point is 02:05:53 a lifetime supply of Kachamba. Oh, Kachamba! Oh, I love their song. Tub-thumping. It actually, that reminds me of a sound that you would make, Kachamba!
Starting point is 02:06:05 Me? Yeah, because you love the arugas. I do love an arugua. Kachamba is a, like a salad dish. It's like chopped tomatoes, cucumber onions, unriped mangoed lemon juice, like a little, like a fresh,
Starting point is 02:06:19 little salsa type thing, delish. Sounds lovely. Sounds so nice. The most nutritious one we've had so far. It's got, yeah, it's got vegetables in it. Salt's pretty important. That's true. You got to get the balance right, though.
Starting point is 02:06:30 So is that specific type of mustard that we've mentioned. Tewksbury. From Bellevue Heights in South Australia, thank you and hello to Genevieve Smith. Got a lifetime supply of hot sauce. Oh, I hope Genevieve likes it hot. Because if you do, that's perfect. If not, you're like, this is a waste.
Starting point is 02:06:45 It's a really hot sauce, though. And we're talking temperature or space? Both. Oh, warm. I suppose it would be, like, because I'm a warm. I'm imagining that game that we had ages ago, we talked about what soft drink or drinks would come out of your fingers. I'm imagining the source is coming out of your fingers, which would mean it is quite warm.
Starting point is 02:07:01 It's blood. I forgot that game of, yeah, drinks out of every finger. Five fingers, five drinks. That rules. Go-go gadget finger. It saves so much money. My mouth is dry right now. I'd be doing the water one.
Starting point is 02:07:17 Straight in. I'd be getting the salt in there. I'd probably do the pointer is the water. Yeah. Yeah. This one would be whiskey or something. Yeah, yeah. That would just be a pre-made margarita for me.
Starting point is 02:07:27 A little bit rude. That's the middle finger, of course, as if listeners didn't. They knew. They knew. Pinky would be tea. Oh, yeah, that's perfect. That's pretty boring tea. Say when?
Starting point is 02:07:45 Do you think it would be sanitary if, like, if Matt had tea on his finger and I felt like a tea and I just put a mug out. Do you think it'd be like hygienic to take tea from you? Oh, I'd be like, can you wash your hands first? Oh, is it like splashing up onto my fingers? I don't know, it's coming out of your fingers and I don't know where your hands have been.
Starting point is 02:08:07 The inside of my hands. Oh, true. That's worse. That's worse somehow. Never washed in there. Well, I don't know. I feel like it's all like stainless still piping or something. Yeah, it's going to be.
Starting point is 02:08:17 Oh, okay, that's good. It's got to be. Anyway, finally I'd like to thank for this section. from Canber in the Australian Capital Territory. Thank you to Thomas Roids. Thomas has a lifetime supply of salad cream. Oh, salad cream. Salad cream.
Starting point is 02:08:34 That doesn't sound good. I know. On Wikipedia it says it's a creamy pale yellow condiment based on an emulsion of about 25 to 50% oil in water, emulsified by egg yolk. Anyway, it's like a mayo, I guess. Yeah, like I think there's just something about it being named so. You're basically like, it is, it's a cream you put on your salad. I don't know why, that makes it less appetising.
Starting point is 02:08:59 Yeah. I guess it's similar to brown sauce. Yeah, they need to rebrand that. Because I imagine a brown sauce would probably be really nice. Yeah. It's a great colour for a sauce. That's a great, yeah. Gravy's brown.
Starting point is 02:09:10 But if gravy was called brown sauce, I probably never would have tried it. Yeah, they say, did you want some brown sauce on your roast? Oh, I'm okay. I'm okay. Thank you, though. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, oh, oh, I've thought about it.
Starting point is 02:09:20 Thank you. Oh, a bit full. Bitful for sauce. Bitful. Bitsole. Bit full. That means full for source. Bit soul.
Starting point is 02:09:27 Now, Dave, the last thing we need to do is welcome some people into our triptych club. John, explain that. This is our clubhouse, our Hall of Fame, which is all theater of mine, but, you know, it's a beautiful place. Once you're welcomed in here, you can never leave, but why would you? And the people that are welcomed in, I've been on the shout-out level for three consecutive years, the shout-level or above, three consecutive years. They've never fallen off that tier.
Starting point is 02:09:49 So to enshrine them in do go on glory. we welcome them in to the clubhouse. The name goes up on the wall and we supply them with games, fun, entertainment. There's music. I'm doing a trivia night once a week these days. It's going off. People are taking it very seriously.
Starting point is 02:10:05 A bit too seriously, guys. I'm sick of having to pick the tables up that you're flipping. It's a line afterwards to people to talk to Dave to object to certain questions. I think you'll actually find. The line is longer than the trivia. So, yeah, it's getting a lot. Oh, I didn't even recap from the show. out to Thomas Genevieve, Katie, Casey, Bree, Massachai, Josh, Paula and Alana. Thank you, all of you.
Starting point is 02:10:28 Jess, you're behind the bar and the Triptitch Club. Yeah. It's more of a, it's a, I've got some food specials this week, so to celebrate ketchup, I've got all the classics that you want, uh, ketchup on. Hot dogs, chips, burgers. Oh, yes. Um, corn dog. What else do you like sauce? Pie. Yes, sausage roll. I was waiting for it. Thank you. Um, just some white. bread with butter on it. Put some sauce on that. Fucking delicious. Sauce of that.
Starting point is 02:10:55 Some gronians. Grangians. Potato gems. It's a lot of carbs, a lot of oil back here. Yep. Love that. And then drinks-wise, I've just got hot ketchup. Yeah, fantastic.
Starting point is 02:11:07 Slam me down fast. Like a hot toddy. Yeah. Hot ketchup is a bit thick. It's like a soup. Do a hot, surely do a hot tomato sauce. Yeah. Thinner.
Starting point is 02:11:14 More vinegar. Yeah. Easier to take a shot of. Famously. Very different. Yummy. Now, Dave, you booked a band, have you? I mean, I'm telling you, I should be asking you.
Starting point is 02:11:23 You're never going to believe it. One week, you're going to forget. This, not this week? This has been years in the making. You've reformed not that long ago, and they've decided to come on down to the club for some more upsets. Is there a specific dance that goes with one of their songs that happens? What's the story morning glory, the dance? You'll never believe.
Starting point is 02:11:43 We are welcoming the Spanish girl group. I thought it was one artist, but it's a girl group Las ketchup. famous for the ketchup song. I haven't reformed recently. I was wondering the oasis connection. I'm like, there's a brand called Fountain, I guess, got a bit of an oasis-y kind of like a fountain springing out in an oasis. Where did you get oasis from?
Starting point is 02:12:04 Recently reformed. Okay. Yeah, and did a lot of extrapolating, which I love. He had a lot of flavor. Did you know that they were a girl group? Yeah, I knew there was a couple of them. And they're sisters. Oh.
Starting point is 02:12:16 There's a surname ketchup? No, it's Munoz. there, Lucia, Lola, and Pilar. Oh, cool. And a fourth sister sometimes joins them, Rottio. That's a dream, being the fourth sister that sometimes joins. I'm busy that week, but I'll probably get you the week after, if you like. That is, good on, so they're going to be hit in the stage.
Starting point is 02:12:35 I assume performing their song that sold seven million copies. Is that a hip, a hip, a hip, a hip, is it really? A hippie to the hippie to the hip-bap-bap-bap-du-bap-bap. Is it really a song? No. Oh. You started kind of close. And then you lost it.
Starting point is 02:12:50 That was pretty good. I knew what you meant. And a boogie and a boogie with me. There. I said a hip. Huh. That's crazy. Yeah. But that is what I was thinking.
Starting point is 02:12:58 Yeah. But I think I was like, did it rip off that old, like old school hip hop song? I said a hip. No, I think you did. Sugar Hill gang. Sugar, I reckon they've ripped that off. Okay. Have they been done for that yet?
Starting point is 02:13:11 Not yet, but there's still time. But I did, somehow I knew that. Got quite a few people entering the Tripitch Club this week. My God. So we're ready to go. I'm on the door. I'm going to read out names off this clipboard I've got here. We're going to get a good flow going, I reckon.
Starting point is 02:13:26 Dave's going to sort of welcome in. He's on stage. He's hopping up the crowd is already in. These people have been waiting three years, Dave. You've got to give them your best. Okay. Yes, of course. Any less will not do.
Starting point is 02:13:39 Of course. It's normally weak word play. So if you are new to this. Yes, of course. If you're new to this, bad is kind of good. Um, it would be a, actually, it'd be a real slap in the face if he did some really clever stuff. So, um, that'd be offensive.
Starting point is 02:13:56 Yeah. Uh, so, you know, be happy. And, uh, I'm going to read him out. What have we got? We got one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, maybe. Oh, my gosh. Are you ready, Dave? Yes, is also going to hop up, Dave, because in this bit, we pretend that he's got
Starting point is 02:14:10 loose of steam. Dave, given there's so many, can I put both hands on both butt cheeks? Please, I need this. Maybe start with one on the right, maybe add. the left for the second half. As we need, okay. All right. A bit of oomph.
Starting point is 02:14:21 If you hear your name, run on in, and don't forget to hang around for Loss ketchup. Here we go, as we say down here, the tomato sauce. First up, welcome in from Moira in Queensland here in Australia. It's Dean Drennan. Dren out of Drennan. What, 10 out of 10. Couldn't ask for any Moira. Whose fucking job is it?
Starting point is 02:14:44 Who from Ridge, Chris. I don't even pronounce it that way. Is it more you say that? from Ridgecrest in California and the United States guys we're trying to keep a bit of a tempo going on here I'd love to welcome into the club
Starting point is 02:14:55 Annabelle Martino Ring the Annabelle Martino That's a Martine yes from me From Egram So Rapids Can we edit him out? I'm fucking believable Guys if you stop stepping on it
Starting point is 02:15:08 We're trying to get a rhythm going here From EGran Rapids In me in the United States Maybe Minasmer That's your one job. That's your one job. Well, from...
Starting point is 02:15:20 Stick to your job. From East Grand Rapids, probably in M.I. US. It's the C-3. The C-3 make me go he-he. Woo! So funny! C-3 out of three. Now, from Salzburg in Austria.
Starting point is 02:15:37 I've been there. Fantastic. The Hills are alive. No doubt about it. Welcome in. I think she's actually back now. I saw her at my recent Sydney show. It's Katie Salisbury.
Starting point is 02:15:45 Katie made me do it 180. And then I was like, what am I doing? I should be talking to Katie, so I did another one, 80. Yeah. Katie Sellers, Barry, you're dead big time. All right.
Starting point is 02:15:53 And then let's get to move on with our lives. Never talk about it again. What does that mean? Her name's got Barry in it. From like Barry's B. Let's just let him do it. Let's let him do the whole thing. Okay, great.
Starting point is 02:16:04 From Cannon Falls. No. No, we've got a thing we do it together. We've got a flogoing. I thought we did, but you kept stepping on. Yeah, you've got a fucking flow going. From Cannon Falls in M. Probably Minnesota this time, I reckon in the United States.
Starting point is 02:16:16 It's Andrew split-tosa. I will never split-thosa from you, Andrew. That's right. You've got beautiful cannons. You'll never falls. You're only on the up. Andrew from Princeton in NJ, New Jersey, I reckon, in the United States. William Hofstader.
Starting point is 02:16:33 I love the Hoff. I not David Hasselhoff. I love William. William Hofstater. Will I am or won't I am? It's a will-I-am from me from Philadelphia in Pennsylvania in the United States. Welcome to the club. Caroline Covert.
Starting point is 02:16:48 Well, you tried to go undercover, but I'd recognize you anywhere, Caroline Covert. Yeah, Philadelphia. I thought I just thought something would happen. I've had my absolute Philadelphia of you, and I mean that in a good way, just enough. Thank you, Caroline. From London in Great Britain. Welcome into the club, M. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 02:17:12 From James Bond. They're from London as well. Oh, my God. Is that MI 5? Am I 6? That which one is Judy Dench or Ray? Or the old one? Is M the boss or is M the Gadgett's guy?
Starting point is 02:17:24 The boss. The boss. The gadget's guy is cute. Oh my God. M. This is huge. And of course standing for my favourite person. Am standing for million dollars worth of goodness.
Starting point is 02:17:37 This is, why do you say? We are working together. Why do you need to say London with a question mark on you? London. Oh, yeah, yeah. London. tick like a
Starting point is 02:17:47 done and it's like a question land on tick yeah it's like it was
Starting point is 02:17:53 and from Roseburg in Oregon in the United States welcome to the club Caitlin
Starting point is 02:18:02 Caitlin thanks for Waitlin during all this bullshit you got anything for Caitlin yeah
Starting point is 02:18:08 Lynn Lynn Lynn I feel inspired by your pizzazz. And finally, from Beaver Falls in Pennsylvania, in the United States.
Starting point is 02:18:24 Welcome in, Katie McCracken. Katie McCracken, more like Katie, um, pack and my decks. Tell you what, Katie, I'm so excited. You know when you have diarrhea when you're excited? And I'm an eager beaver to meet you. Welcome in, Katie. Man, we know, have we nailed that harder before? That could be the best one we've ever done.
Starting point is 02:18:44 That could be the best one we've ever done. You know, when you get diarrhea, are you excited? Yeah. Well, I'm about to right now. That's how well we just did. That was the tea. You know what I'll fix that right up? Here's a tomato.
Starting point is 02:18:56 Here's a love apple for you. Katie, Caitlin M. Caroline, William, Andrew, Katie, the C, Annabelle and Dean. Welcome in, make yourselves at home and enjoy the workings of the tomato sauce. That brings the end of the episode. Does anything else we need to talk about before we pack up our dacks? we pack these dacks that anyone can suggest a topic. There's a link in the show notes.
Starting point is 02:19:21 It's also on our website, which is do-go-onpod.com. And you can find us on social media at do-go-on-pod or do-go-on podcast on TikTok. Dave, Bura. We'll be back next week with the seventh most requested block topic for 2025. Thank you so much for listening. We should mention this whole time Humphrey has been here asleep next to me in the studio. Very different from when Goose was here, Jess's dog. He just popped his head up and went,
Starting point is 02:19:47 I'm like, I forgot you were here too. For those you don't know, Dave, what kind of dog? A grudel or a golden doodle, as I say in North America, I believe. A golden retriever cross poodle. Beautiful dog. Perfect little angel. He's a little angel. Has not dropped his guts.
Starting point is 02:20:02 I know. I forgot he was here. I know, me too. Anyway, we'll be back next week with another episode. In brackets, complimentary. Yes. Thank you so much. Until then, it's goodbye.
Starting point is 02:20:12 Later. Bye. Happy block, happy block. I said a blick Don't forget to sign up to our tour mailing list so we know where in the world you are and we can come and tell you when we're coming there wherever we go
Starting point is 02:20:25 we always hear six months later Oh you should come to Manchester We were just in Manchester But this way you'll never Miss out And don't forget to sign up Go to our Instagram Click our link tree
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