Do Go On - 532 - Dashcon Failure

Episode Date: December 31, 2025

In 2014, a group of Tumblr users decided to put on a Tumblr convention. Except they had no idea how to organise a convention ... This is a comedy/history podcast, the report begins at approximately 05...:28 (though as always, we go off on tangents throughout the report).For all our important links: https://linktr.ee/dogoonpod Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/Who Knew It with Matt Stewart: https://play.acast.com/s/who-knew-it-with-matt-stewart/Jess Writes A Rom-Com: https://shows.acast.com/jess-writes-a-rom-comOur awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader ThomasDo Go On acknowledges the traditional owners of the land we record on, the Wurundjeri people, in the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders, past and present. REFERENCES AND FURTHER READING:https://fanlore.org/wiki/DashCon#cite_note-21https://dashcon2014b.sched.com/https://edition.cnn.com/2023/06/18/us/tumblr-dashcon-social-media-2010s-cechttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DashConhttps://knowyourmeme.com/memes/events/dashconhttps://www.nerdandtie.com/2014/07/14/dashcon-a-perfect-storm-of-incompetence/https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZAqy-KDJAUMhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ZgxeX2dCnQ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Melbourne and Canada, we got exciting news for you. And we should also say this is 2026. Jess, what year is it? 2026. Thank God you're here. Right now, I'm in Melbourne doing my show with Serengy Amarna 630 each night at the Cooper's Inn Hotel, having so much fun. We'd love to see you there. Canada, we are visiting you in September this year.
Starting point is 00:00:20 If you've somehow missed the news, we are heading up Vancouver, Calgary, Montreal and Toronto for shows. That's going to be so much fun. Tickets for all this stuff, I believe, are online. And I'm here too. Welcome to another episode of Do Go On. Adelaide, how you doing out there? Thank you so much. My name is David Warnigke and as always, I'm here with Jess Perkins and Matt Stewart.
Starting point is 00:00:58 Oh, wow. We live to Pod and here we are. Well, don't make me look down. Jesus. Let's keep talking. Well, it's very good. Quick question. How good is it to be alive? Okay.
Starting point is 00:01:15 I was clearly asking you, Dave, but he didn't want to. answer, fair enough. We haven't been here for years. Yeah. The three of us together. Yeah. I think the last time we're at the Wine Museum or something. Yeah, does that still exist? Okay. Okay. Great. Great.
Starting point is 00:01:31 This feels more our speed, to be honest. Yeah. Upstairs, Rhino, thank you very much for having us at this fantastic comedy venue. Now, we always start by asking, give us a round of applause if you've ever heard the show before. Fantastic. Love that. And at the other end of the scale, we always say, don't be show.
Starting point is 00:01:50 Be loud, be proud, give us an applause if you've never heard the show before in your life. That's quite a few, awesome. Yeah, thank you. That was too proud. Thank you. This is good. We prefer an empty seat than someone
Starting point is 00:02:04 who hasn't listened before, so that's ideal. Remember this businessman here hasn't listened before? How is the portfolio? Go well, it's on the up. We understand business. We understand. We see a man wearing a college shirt and no tie.
Starting point is 00:02:25 Honestly, that my brain came up with portfolio. I was so stoked with that. What are you saying? We're in the blue chips. That's all right. You are allowed to ignore him. Sorry, did you say, are you staying in the blue chips? Isn't that?
Starting point is 00:02:42 That makes sense, doesn't it, to you? No. But he knew it didn't make sense. That's impressive. Yeah, that is impressive. That's cool. I'm sure that meant something. So for the business people who have never heard the show before,
Starting point is 00:02:58 be here tonight to invest, please. Stick with us. We take it in terms to report on a topic often suggested to us by one of the listeners. We go away, do a bit of research, then bring it back to the group in the form of a report. Now, Jess, it is your turn to do the report tonight. And you often not always forget. That got it. It's Jess's turn to do the report.
Starting point is 00:03:19 Love that. Now, you often, not always. but often forget to write a question. Where are we at tonight? I wrote one. Backstage. Just now. And I reckon it'll be fine.
Starting point is 00:03:34 Okay. My question to get us onto the topic is, in the mid-2000s, if you wanted to find memes, fan fiction and pop culture content, what social media site would you go to? 4chan, Reddit, MySpace, the internet.
Starting point is 00:03:50 You are in the right ballpark, yes. Anything else, Dave, that you can think of. For Limewire. No, LimeWire. Winn, M. Kazar. No. Napster.
Starting point is 00:04:02 Think about... Meme. Know your meme? I reference Know Your Meme later. Wow, it's a great website. What a great resource. Oh, fantastic. Do you use that much in business?
Starting point is 00:04:15 Yeah. Okay, if you were to... If you were going to be making yourself a drink and you were choosing between a tall glass, thank you. Tumblr. Tumblr. I was thinking, Collins?
Starting point is 00:04:32 I just like to say what I'm thinking. Okay, fair enough. A Tumblr, of course. Of course. That makes complete sense. Correct, yes. So this is about a convention that was put on to celebrate Tumblr
Starting point is 00:04:51 called DashCon. Woo, woo, woo! Wow, got a few people to know. Specifically. It's voted on by the Patreon. Are you a Patreon if I'm as? Yeah. Because as soon as I started talking, you're like, yes!
Starting point is 00:05:06 I've never been on Tumblr. I know it by name, but I have no idea what it's about. But I love that they're having catch-ups about it. Yeah. Well, to see a couple of things about this topic, it was like, oh, you'll need to log into Tumblr. And I was like, oh, I guess I'll make an account. And it was like, oh, no, you have an account.
Starting point is 00:05:24 And then I got to see my 2014 Tumblr. And, oh, boy. Wow, and you were an active poster? Yeah, I loved Tumblr. Will you be sharing some of that tonight? No. No, it's just a lot of reposting memes. You know, cool stuff.
Starting point is 00:05:46 Anyway, it's been suggested by a few people. Laura from the Gold Coast, Lucy from Brisbane, Meg from Sydney, Chenade from Dublin, Tom WB Hill from the UK, and Tyson from Colac. And as I said, voted on by the patrons with... It had about 50% of the vote.
Starting point is 00:06:01 It was an absolute landslide. In a two horse race. In a two horse race. Yeah, to make it... So then I just picked... Yeah, captain's call. Yeah, I just went, oh, I'm just going to do whatever I want.
Starting point is 00:06:11 Okay, so I'll give you a bit of background here. A.J. Willingham writes for CNN. Though the blogging platform is still active, Tumblr's unquestionable heyday passed in the mid-20s. It was and still is hailed as the crucible of nerddom, where young people gather to trade memes, pop culture observations, poems, musings, fan fiction, art and absurdist jokes to satisfy even the most niche communities. Years of Tumblr discourse have helped shape current structures of entertainment fandoms,
Starting point is 00:06:43 social justice language, queer subcultures, and all manner of special interests one might see at a comic book convention or Marvel movie premiere. So in its heyday, it was huge, very influential. I didn't know it still existed until I logged in. and went, ha, that is a pretty funny meme from George of the Jungle. And I stand by it. So in 2014, some Tumblr users thought it would be a good idea to try and take that sense of community and creativity
Starting point is 00:07:17 and recreate it in real life. Now, we've heard stories on this podcast before about how things go when unexperienced people try to put on big sort of festival-type things. Like on a Caribbean island or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Same vibe. Yeah, okay, okay.
Starting point is 00:07:35 From Willingham again. The result was DashCon, an attempt to bring together Tumblr users from different interests and fandoms for a single event. The idea was similar to the already popular VidCon, which focuses on YouTube celebrities, or any number of fan conventions around the world that have been going strong for decades.
Starting point is 00:07:52 So these, like, conventions exist. They're like, let's just do another one. How hard could it be? How hard could it be? Right off the back. That, like, I think they've sort of tripped up. The name is weird. Is it about...
Starting point is 00:08:04 Yeah, I'll get to that. Yeah. Should it be like Tumcon or something? They're like, dash or like the front of a car inside of it. I don't understand it. Or is it about just like a horizontal short line? It's both. And neither.
Starting point is 00:08:25 Yeah. I thought so. It's exciting. I will explain that. Wait, is it? I'll literally explain that, I think, in the next couple of sentences. Well, I'll only let you get there. That's him.
Starting point is 00:08:42 He never lets me get there. Hey! But when you do, it's going to be so good. Edging on a podcast. Ten years. Oh God. So DashCon was originally announced in mid-2013 under the name TumbleCon USA. Okay.
Starting point is 00:09:23 And it was touted as the largest gathering of Tumblr users to date. The convention... The previous record was three. We're going to go for ten. The convention aimed to have stalls and panels for various fandoms that were popular on Tumblr, like Star Trek, Sherlock, Harry Potter, Hunger Games, T-Wrower. Wolf, the list goes on. Why did Teen Wolf get a laugh?
Starting point is 00:09:46 Why did Teen Wolf get a mention? You'll understand why later. Because of my love of one of the stars of Teen Wolf. Michael J. Foxx. Michael J. Fox. According to the CNN article, the original idea can be traced back to a teenage girl named Lachlan O'Neill, who was 17 at the time. She'd been using Tumblr for a couple of years and it started to get into
Starting point is 00:10:08 cosplay, anime and the Avengers, all extremely popular subjects among Tumblr users. She was also really into small animal husbandry. I know we know that it doesn't mean it, but you're still picturing little animals in a tuxedo.
Starting point is 00:10:29 100%. Animal husbandry to me is like a wedding planner for animals. I think, yeah. I imagine it with a headset. She's like, and go for the bride. That's what I'm picturing. I imagine like, you know, matchmaking, like this cat and this dog.
Starting point is 00:10:45 And you have to get married. You have to. Oh, okay. We're all pictured different things. That's what I imagine. To me, a husband is a guy in a tuxedo. Yeah. This is my husband.
Starting point is 00:10:59 You're like, he's going to be wearing a tuxedo. I think maybe I've only ever seen a husband out of wedding. Do they keep wearing him after that? Are they still a husband half of the day? What do you think I'm wearing underneath this? What about brides? What a bet? Yeah, exactly. Yeah, who gives a shit?
Starting point is 00:11:18 Who gives a shit? That's Mr. the pod. The brides get much attention. I don't think they've got enough, mate. What about husbands? About time someone spoke up for husbands. Dave, I've got your back, mate. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:11:37 Thank you. Anyway, so she's really into animal husbandry. And she said, I started on Tumblr writing traditional blogs about mouse genetics. My blog was called Mice are nice. You can do anything on Tumblr. And is this going to get it to install at the convention? Maybe. No, I just thought that was pretty funny to mention.
Starting point is 00:11:59 Is Tumblr the one with just lots of pictures, like a theme boards or whatever? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I've definitely heard of it. Yeah, that's great. But is this the kind of thing like everyone did it but me? And me? Okay.
Starting point is 00:12:15 Give us a cheer, actually, if you were on Tumblr. the back in the day. Okay. Give us a cheer if you'd never heard of Tumblr. Okay. So you're not the only one. Chee now if you like animal husbandry? Okay.
Starting point is 00:12:31 Mice are nice. I saw you. Nice. This is very sweet. She said over time, she even met one of her best friends on the platform after searching content about her hometown. She said, I was always kind of an outsider.
Starting point is 00:12:42 I didn't really have the ability to connect with people and I didn't know why. Well, you're obsessed with mice. You're the weirdo of your town. Everyone's talking about you behind your back. I've no idea. No idea. Why would it be anyway?
Starting point is 00:12:57 What to look at my boss? That's how she meets people. Have a look at my mice. I think you... But the town was big enough for a second mouse weirdo. Beautiful. So this is a lovely story. Well, she met her best friend and then she was like,
Starting point is 00:13:16 well, there must be more people like me on Tumblr. There must be more people like her on Tumblr. oh my god she noticed this pattern lots of people forming strong bonds with virtual strangers online over things that really mattered to them things they didn't have a network for in their everyday lives and she saw these posts and she thought what if there was a tumbler convention what if i made it and then all of you could also have friends oh it's very sweet that's beautiful quite sweet it's very sweet and you would just absolutely ripping her a new one yeah i don't i mean i don't know if she's thought it through because it's like everyone's got different
Starting point is 00:13:50 sub-genres and hobbies and such she's going to bring the mouse people together with like the dog people, are they all animals? No. Well, I mean then, even more crazy, there'll be like the tractor people and the, some people who are like, you know, dusting.
Starting point is 00:14:07 It's going to be, they're not all going to get along. Yeah, that's chaos. Yeah. Yeah. Thanks for bringing up my hobby, dusting. Well, we were talking about brides. so I think as a feminist I can make
Starting point is 00:14:30 I think I can make I don't think in your hands I think a joke like that wouldn't come off but I think in a feminist hands the irony there is clear that joke that joke is coming off okay so she started a Tumblr blog called TumbleCon
Starting point is 00:14:54 and it was sort of it was like the launch pad for what would eventually become DashCon named because of their tumblers, like when you log on to Tumbly, the main page was called the dashboard. So they called it dashcon, because it wasn't actually officially affiliated with Tumblr, so they couldn't call it Tumblr.
Starting point is 00:15:12 So they changed the name. Does that explain dashcon to you now? It is crazy that your mind went to dashboard and you weren't wrong. Yeah. That's crazy. Exactly. You were so close.
Starting point is 00:15:24 Yeah, but we won't get there. I'll stop you right there. Enthusiasm for a Tumblr convention quickly grew, and it wasn't long before people were offering to be on committees for different fandoms. So they're like, oh, we'll put together something for this thing that we love. It's great. O'Neill, who, let's remember, was 17 years old, later said it's important to note that before this,
Starting point is 00:15:49 I'd only been to two conventions. One was a small anime convention. The other was a rabbit breeders convention in Indiana. Different kind of vibes. but the intention is there how hard can it be I don't think I realise she was 17 I'm sorry I was a bit mean to her before
Starting point is 00:16:09 does it do you feel okay about being mean to her because she's a woman does that make it better no I don't feel good about it in either way okay just want to check I think only you know adult men are strong enough to
Starting point is 00:16:25 take that kind of criticism and I think science will back me up says the most sensitive of all of us. Shut up. So she goes on to say, that's what I was imagining when I was imagining this event. Lots of booths for different interests, fun activities, all
Starting point is 00:16:48 of that. I was a teenager. Maybe I was stupid, but when people said they were going to help out or attend, I trusted them. Don't pity her, it's all right. It's fine. She's not 17 anymore. You know?
Starting point is 00:17:03 When did this happen? 2014. Oh, fuck her. Yeah, get another one. So a YouTuber called Strange Eons has done a two-hour video on DashCon and interviews around 50 people who attended the convention. They talk about how all of the different committees were basically in charge of coming up with their own programming
Starting point is 00:17:38 for their fandom. So it was just, you were left to your own devices. One person they spoke to was part of the Avatar, the last Airbender Committee. And this is what they said in an email. They said, let me be clear. During this point where we were in charge of planning panels, we had zero idea of what a convention panel was
Starting point is 00:17:56 slash we had never been to a convention. We were trying to put on a whole stage play of The Boy in the Iceberg, which is the first episode of the first season. No scripts were written, costumes made, or people cast. Okay. It's got a pretty sick live score. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:16 Would you need to have seen something before to know that those were really? required. Like, they're like, oh, I wouldn't have even known. We'd never seen a panel. Yeah. So we just, we don't. Well, they were just, they're like, well, easy.
Starting point is 00:18:29 We'll just put on a live performance of an episode. Yes. I guess you must need costumes for that, I guess. Yeah. Yeah. But no people. No, they haven't cast anyone, but, you know, it'll, it'll just happen. That'll sort itself out.
Starting point is 00:18:43 It'll sort itself out. On the day. Oh, sorry, I didn't thought about that. Yeah, yeah, you just got to think on the day. And did it sort itself out on the day? Okay. So for a while it seemed like it was basically a bunch of excited teenagers kind of think tanking about how cool it would be to do a convention
Starting point is 00:18:58 but maybe not actually like getting stuff done. So lots of ideas being... Heaps of ideas. And as this idea gained traction, the planning and admin kind of got taken over by others. And while O'Neill was moving into state with her family and just didn't have the internet for a bit, she wasn't as active.
Starting point is 00:19:16 The whole convention ballooned into something massive. a limited liability partnership called DashCon LLP had been set up owned by two women, Megan, Eli and Roxanne Schweitzman. And based on what I've read, neither of them had any experience or relevant qualifications either. But they were like, sweet, we'll just make an LLP and we'll get this ball rolling.
Starting point is 00:19:43 So regardless, a date was set and a location found. The first ever dashcon was taking place July 11 to 13, 2014 at the Renaissance Schaumburg Convention Centre Hotel in Illinois I've got convention in the title that's pretty good convention centre and hotel yeah like that seems like the right place to have a convention and very optimistic to call it the first ever dashcon
Starting point is 00:20:07 yes yeah the first of many yeah I've got a good feeling about this so they the convention announced an initial $5,000 fundraising goal in March of 2013 so the year before They're like, we need to raise some money to make this thing happen. So they want to raise five grand, and they have plans to apply for a bunch of grants. So posting on the conventions Tumblr page, they wrote, hosting a convention is not something any of us saw in ourselves.
Starting point is 00:20:34 For a while, TumbleCon was just a half-shaped idea. I caught a whiff of every once in a while when a stray post or two drifted onto my dash. Are you following any of these words? Breathing new life into this idea has been something all of our staff members have been working. tirelessly for over the last month or so. We hardly remember our lives before TumbleCon. This has been my lifelong dream for the last 30 days. We have been working tirelessly.
Starting point is 00:21:04 Part-time hours, probably not even, for a month now. Working tirelessly whenever we got a whiff. Yeah, just when there was a whiff across the dash. Unfortunately... The idea stank, obviously. Catching a whiff. Yeah. They go on.
Starting point is 00:21:30 Unfortunately, there's only so much passion you can put into starting a business. Okay. Before the real work comes crashing down on your shoulders. Mainly, we have to deal with the government and money. Oh, God, red tape, am I right? They say, we can take care of the legal aspect. However, money is not something
Starting point is 00:21:49 a group of 20-somethings really have in abundance. But they have the legal aspect. They got that covered. you worry you pretty little mind about it. Sorry, yeah, great, right, right. We just need your cash. This is where you, our followers, can help. If we have just a hundred of our nearly 4,000 followers donate a mere $10,
Starting point is 00:22:07 we would have enough money to get us on our feet, pay for some software we need, file additional forms, and pay fees for applying for more grants. On top of a few for which we've already applied. So they just need just give us money, give us your money. Please, we'll do all the rest. We'll handle the legal in the red tape and the yaddy, yada, yada. You don't worry about that. Just give us the cash.
Starting point is 00:22:34 There are so many different committees who plan to host events at the convention, and they had to raise the necessary funds to do so. So they would do that through selling commissions and fan art and fanfic, all sorts of things. For example, the Star Trek committee planned to split their funds 60-40, 60% of the amount raised going to the convention, and the remaining 40 to help members of the committee to attend the convention. So they're trying to like, there's fundraising happening everywhere, not just for the actual convention, but for all the committees as well.
Starting point is 00:23:02 Special guests were advertised, including Doug Jones, who's known for portraying non-human characters. He's in Pans, Labyrinth and Hellboy in the Shape of Water. A web comic artist called N.D. Stevenson and the cast of Welcome to Night Vale, which was a hugely popular, absurdist, supernatural fiction podcast, and it was a massive selling point for a lot of attendees. Lots of people wanted to come and see this live show. they did occasionally do live shows and they always sold out really quick so people were like we've got to go to the con to see this podcast and this guy who plays a non-human character yeah the guy who's in the Dougie Dougie Dougie oh catch up with Doug I'd go for Doug yeah yeah but you'd go for Doug anyway just I'm just trying to say that welcome to Nightvale was a big selling point yeah great they were huge they were huge Big selling point. Numerous panels were planned for the duration of the convention
Starting point is 00:24:04 and the process for being selected as a panelist was surprisingly complex. Panelists were vetted to determine their qualifications in several different areas, including but not limited to subject knowledge, leadership abilities and public speaking skills. They also needed to be willing and able to submit a Skype video interview before being selected. Panelists who managed to attract more than 50 attendees across two panels, were promised that their membership for the day would be comped. Panelists who exceeded a headcount of more than 100 would receive their membership for that day for free.
Starting point is 00:24:38 So it was also, bring some friends. Be on a panel, be able to speak, bring some friends. I just want to say that that is not normal. So I got that... Okay, because I haven't been to any conventions. I know, I know. I've never been to a convention. So on fanlaw.org,
Starting point is 00:24:58 for clarity they added this policy was a departure from most fan run conventions where fans participated in programming without regards to compensation nor is the quality of fan panelists typically measured by number of panel attendees so that's not typically how it's done
Starting point is 00:25:15 you can do a panel if you can bring lots of people is not typically how convention might run but who says we can't change the game yeah that's right got to start somewhere you know it's exciting and it's fun and everything's going really well. How would they normally would do panels
Starting point is 00:25:34 to not attract an audience? Yeah. Like it sounds like, to me it sounds kind of smart to encourage audiences to come. Huh. But you think that's one of the big mistakes they've made so far? No.
Starting point is 00:25:50 Okay. No, I don't think that's one of the big mistakes. Matt, I'm thinking that's not even the top ten so far. Yeah, and we haven't even got to it. No, no, no, it's just that it's a, it was a way more strenuous process than ever normally, yeah. I mean, one of the things you mentioned was that they had to be able to do a Skype. Yep. Pretty strenuous.
Starting point is 00:26:15 Do you remember Skype? Yeah, that was an impossible. That made no sense. That made no sense. So the month before the convention in June, a post was made asking for applications for volunteers of the convention with really fun perks like if you worked from one to 11 hours you would receive undying gratitude that's pretty good yeah well that's forever yeah never-ending gratitude i'll take that undying that sounds fantastic that's beautiful if you wanted to add just an extra hour and go from 12 to 19 hours you'd receive a refund
Starting point is 00:26:51 of your badge cost and if you want to do 20 plus hours you would receive a refund of your badge cost and your hotel room will be comped for friday and Saturday nights. Whoa, so you now don't have to pay to work. Yeah. So if you work 20 hours, you get to break even at work. How good is that? That's really good.
Starting point is 00:27:10 Yeah. Do you also get the undying gratitude? Or do you have to pick the hotel over that? Because I'd pick the gratitude because that is forever, like you said. That's a great point. Yeah, I don't think it's like, oh, it's this package plus whatever's in the lower ones. I think you have to choose.
Starting point is 00:27:23 Yeah. So you're going undying gratitude? Yeah, unless the buffet breakfast is included. It doesn't say. No. Undying gratitude for me. Thank you. He loves a buffet breakfast.
Starting point is 00:27:33 Oh my gosh. He loves to pay too much for shit food. Yeah, it's usually about $40 a head and I'm like, okay, how much do I have to eat to make this worth it? The answer, $41. I've just worked that out. And I can't eat that much. Are you doing that though? You're going, all right, omelette, this is worth $12.
Starting point is 00:27:54 Yeah, I'm like, blue cheese. Blue cheese, that's expensive. That's expensive. Like, I get food that I don't even. one I put on my plate, I throw it on the floor, $5 of ham out the window. I get my money's worth.
Starting point is 00:28:07 Okay. Yeah, I break a toaster. You don't drink coffee, but you've got a tray of coffee. Yeah, a tray full of coffee. Plus, you getting your value, it's more just costing there. You make sure they're... It's about punishing a local business. You're a bad person. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:33 I found some of the original Tumblr posts from the dashcon account this is when I logged in and went huh someone asked what the dress code was for dashcon there's so many
Starting point is 00:28:45 answers yeah but this one's so confusing they replied the dress code is only this only this no t-shirts
Starting point is 00:28:55 no shorts no sneakers and no jeans everything else is up to you so fully nude nude is fine they'd prefer nude than a t-shirt
Starting point is 00:29:07 at a Con. Whatever, like some... I know. Like, this is all sorts of fandums, probably including T-shirt fandoms. No T-shirts. The Levi-Strauss group's going to be shattered by this dress code.
Starting point is 00:29:21 We'd be fucked. No T-shirts, no shorts, no sneakers, no jeans. Oh, no. I'd be left wearing this jacket and that is it. We'd be Winnie the Pooing of the show. But Matt would just be in a jumper and hat. Yeah. More of a Donald duck.
Starting point is 00:29:40 Yeah. And I'm fucked. Yeah, it's not good. I was so confused. What the fuck can you wear? I was so confused. Our mate here would be okay. Go all business.
Starting point is 00:29:58 He'd be in the blue chips. Oh, come on. There's no cons in business, am I right? Yeah. Can I ask what you do? Ask the hackiest question of all comedy? I'm a police officer. A police officer.
Starting point is 00:30:13 And you do, you look fantastic. Yeah, you look fantastic. Very, very well turned out. I'm pretty glad I haven't done my ACAP catchphrase tonight. You are doing a great job of going undercover tonight. It does make some sense. If he was on a tram at home, you'd know he's about to check the ticket. Yeah, big time.
Starting point is 00:30:46 I did get a vibe that he was kind of sick of our shit. And it's like, yeah, that tracks. It's like any other situation, you're on the fucking floor right now. If you're not a cop, that was the funniest possible answer. 100%. And we will not be speaking to you again? Thank you so much. Thank you for coming, and I'm going to look in this section.
Starting point is 00:31:09 I'll look from here onwards, the rest of the night. Okay, so from what I read online, a ticket for the whole weekend was about $65,75. Okay. Not bad. It's like a whole convention. Yeah. I think that's pretty reasonable. I think it was certainly at the time expensive for a convention,
Starting point is 00:31:28 particularly because this was a new one. But looking at it at 2025 prices, I'm like, well, that's pretty good. You know? Yeah, that's... I mean, okay, for example, Matt and I paid $75 last weekend because our carry-on bags on Jet Star were one kilo over. So, you know. And they weren't carrying anything suspicious.
Starting point is 00:31:49 I need you know that. Otherwise that $75 would have been really worth it But it wasn't That kilo brick of whatever it was So you know In terms of value You could have a whole weekend for that And we got one pretty shit flight
Starting point is 00:32:12 Anyway There was also a limited number of daily tickets available They limited it to 500 a day And they range between like $20 to $45 So attendees start arriving On Thursday the 10th of July the night before, and some attendees and vendors said,
Starting point is 00:32:30 in hindsight, they should have been sussed from the very beginning because the convention centre hotel was too nice. Several people were like, this is too fancy for a new convention. Oh, okay, yeah. Like it's, you know, this has been made by a bunch of teens and 20s fans just making something else. This is a bit too nice. In hindsight, it was, yeah, very swanky hotel.
Starting point is 00:32:55 but with an estimated 3.5 to 7,000 people expected to come, it just made sense to host a convention at a space that is frequently used for big events like that. You know, you're getting that many people in. You need a convention centre, okay? Yeah, but weren't they capping tickets at 500? Yeah, that was for like daily tickets. Okay.
Starting point is 00:33:16 But then most people would have pre-purchased tickets also. Oh, okay. Dave, you're correct to be confused. Yeah, okay, yeah, yeah. But they're expecting thousands of people, okay. Yes. Okay, great. Probably 5 to 7,000 is what they reckon.
Starting point is 00:33:29 So people have come from far and wide to Illinois. This weekend's going to be amazing. So day one rolls around, and attendance is estimated around 3 to 500. Thousand. Yes. Three to 500. Okay. So they were right.
Starting point is 00:33:52 500 being like at its peak. So they were right when they said. somewhere between five and seven thousand, five individuals. That's pretty good, really. That's spot on. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely right.
Starting point is 00:34:06 The numbers don't lie. When they first arrived, attendees were directed to a large room for registration to pick up their convention badges. It was a massive, empty room with like polished concrete floors, like huge, like probably triple the size of this room. Hard to imagine a room that. I know. For listeners at home, this room is huge.
Starting point is 00:34:28 Yeah, there are between 5,000 and 7,000 people here tonight. That is true. So naturally they set the registration table up at the very far end. So people are turning up having to walk through this empty room to this little trestle table at the back. They set up the things that have to walk around and around. Do you? Do you? Okay, it's, okay.
Starting point is 00:34:55 There's two situations where I feel like the dumbest fuck in the world. One is when there's no one else in front of you and you have to snake your way around. And the other is when a hat blows off in the wind. And you sort of have to chase it. Don't you chase it. Imagine both happen on the same. Oh, man. That's a bad day.
Starting point is 00:35:16 No, I think it almost maybe would have made the room feel a bit fuller if it had the ropes. But just empty and the table all the way over there. So again, they're like, in hindsight, maybe it wasn't going to be as smooth as we'd hoped. So they get their IDs. Panels and events that took place on day one, I found the schedule for it, and this is just a few that I found that I thought you might be interested in,
Starting point is 00:35:41 a day in the life at Hogwarts. What's the deal with Beacon Hills? I looked into that. It's a group discussion of the writing, cinematography, and general amazingness of Teen Wolf. Ask an Avenger, which is good. You can ask the Avengers questions at that one. Right, who answers?
Starting point is 00:36:01 The Avengers. Oh, that's good. They got the Avengers. They actually got an Avenger there? Nope. And then in the evening, you could go to an improv game called Whose Line Is It Tumblr? That is subtle but good writing.
Starting point is 00:36:20 Whose line is it Tumblr? Whose line is it Tumblr? just works. That just works. Wordplay, normally you need a couple of different angles to work at the same time and they've done that.
Starting point is 00:36:30 Yeah. That's, I mean... Who's line is it? Tumblr. I'm such a hack. I would have gone for whose Tumblr is it anyway,
Starting point is 00:36:36 but that's obviously several times worse. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're dumb. Whose line is it Tumblr? Whose line is it Tumblr? Things took a bit of a turn when... That's really funny.
Starting point is 00:36:52 Who's lying is it Tumblr? Whose line is it Tumblr? That's one of the funniest things I've ever heard. So good. Tonight was worth it after all. Yeah. Thank God. So things took a bit of a turn when by late into the opening day of the con,
Starting point is 00:37:11 the organisers announced that the hotel was threatening to shut down the convention unless they could pay $17,000 by 10pm. They're being a hell of ransom. Oh yeah, we will execute this convention unless you pay in unmarked bills. Give me back my con. That's something. I didn't even realize how good is. I've only changed the S to a C there.
Starting point is 00:37:48 Yeah. Doesn't work that well out loud. Yes, but written down. Which unfortunately a podcast is, mate. Yeah. But when you're reading the transcript of this episode, that's going to really hit. Honestly, it's almost as good as whose line is it toffler.
Starting point is 00:38:05 Which obviously, that works written down and said out loud. I felt quite inspired by that, so. So they have to pay $17,000. $17,000. And they were, like, struggling to raise five. Yeah. Okay. So this is the venues hold.
Starting point is 00:38:21 The hotel, yeah. The convention center slash hotel is like this thing is shut down unless you pay $17,000. And it feels like at this point, they should be like, yeah, shut it down. No worries. If we can just sort of a seat. What do you mean? They have great shows. Like, there's two more days of whose lines at Tumblr.
Starting point is 00:38:37 Oh, really? Oh, okay. Now, we're all three to 500 people hanging around for all the panels? No. Oh. Because I'm like, that could be a pretty nice time at a panel. When they say 500, that was like at its absolute peak across the day. But there was also 500 different fandoms. Yes.
Starting point is 00:38:56 So there's one Star Trek guy. There's a Pokemon fan. Yeah. In a quickly deleted Tumblr post, DashCon staff wrote, The upper management of this hotel is threatening to shut down DashCon. unless we give them $17,000 by 10pm. Please go to dashcon.org and click the donate button and give anything you can.
Starting point is 00:39:16 Unless we get this by tonight, everything is cancelled. We suspect it's due to the fact that upper management doesn't like the people at the con. Yeah, that's right. This is discrimination. Oh, yeah, if we don't have the money to pay for the thing. Yeah. I bet.
Starting point is 00:39:37 Can you believe that? I cannot believe it. I've just had an idea if our police businessman was going to run a panel It could be called... Be called Boys and Blue Chip. He's back, he's back on board.
Starting point is 00:39:57 Thank you. That's smattering. What about who's blue chip is it? Oh! Oh, whose line is a blue chip? There is. There it is. Whoa.
Starting point is 00:40:07 There it is. Tonight's going to rule, yes? Well, before you continue, I have to have an announcement to make. We've just been told by the management here. The show will be cancelled unless we have $17,000 in cash, put on the stage in the next three minutes. Please give everything you can.
Starting point is 00:40:25 You know what? That's a lot of pressure. Hello. Jess's mic has actually been cut. Honestly, we were not kidding. We were not kidding. What happened? Did someone throw a coin?
Starting point is 00:40:41 Is your mic back, Jess? Yes, I'm back. Okay. Yeah, someone just made a big donation to the bar. Thank you. Thank you so much. We can keep going. That is so funny that they've gone.
Starting point is 00:40:58 We think it's because they don't like the type of people we've attracted. Yeah. Do you think that's why? Or do you think there could be another reason? Yeah. Okay. Yep. You're not going to tell us, like,
Starting point is 00:41:08 you've been hiding the fact that they are like a minority group or something. Oh, just to make you guys look really bad? Yeah. Yeah. In the hand of it, oh, I should have said they're all Protestant. You know Illinois is a Catholic town? This is one of my favourite parts. Oh, I mean, nothing's beating.
Starting point is 00:41:41 Whose line is it Tumblr? It's it Tumblr! So a writer called Garvia Baker Whiteclaw wrote fordaily.com. That's fun to say. Daily dot.com. Footage of the fundraiser announcement shows convention organizers soliciting donations from a crowded ballroom of tumbler users, many of whom hand over cash and then break into song while performing the three-finger salute from the Hunger Games. It actually does get even better.
Starting point is 00:42:14 You heard three-finger salute and you had something to say in the year. I remember when Katna's 17 did two in the big one in the fifth. Yeah. Is that it? Oh, there's multiple combinations. Well, it all depends on, you know. It's really dealers choice. Length of Gooch?
Starting point is 00:42:52 I've become, I don't know if, I'm starting to make our live episodes unreleased. Yeah. Yeah. Let me know if you, you've never mentioned it, but if you want me to rein it in, I can. That's not true. We've mentioned it.
Starting point is 00:43:06 In front of the crowd. Yeah, yeah. We're quite obvious when we want you to shut the phone. fuck up. Today's not that day my friend. I've, so okay imagine imagine a room of 300 plus people all doing this. I've seen some of the footage and they start singing. Firstly they go for queens we are the champions. And then are there any musical theatre nerds in? And then they go for Les Mise. Do you hear the people sing? They get it. Oh, it's not, it's not That's like a real protest song or something.
Starting point is 00:43:57 Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's for the downtrodden. Yeah, it's for the hard done by. In the musical, it's like about prisoners of war or something, right? Sure. I don't know. I've only seen Annie, you know this. Yeah, I know.
Starting point is 00:44:16 I know. Oh my God. They're like handing over cash. Do you hear the people sing? Singing a song of angry men. Shut up you. nerds. Organizers later posted an explanation for the situation
Starting point is 00:44:32 stating that they had an earlier agreement with the hotel that they were going to pay in installments over the course of the weekend. Great. The contract doesn't say that, but they, in the conversation, the hotel said, sure, I guess. The handshake deal seemed to imply that that was what they were after.
Starting point is 00:44:52 We assumed, as pretty experienced business people. Is this still the mouth? woman? No, she's around. She's involved still a bit. Essentially they're like, well, we don't necessarily have the cash up front, but with those door sales, we'll have it, we'll just like give it to you in chunks. Yeah, we're good for it.
Starting point is 00:45:10 Which obviously they have not done straight away. So the hotel's like, okay, so we need payment. Yeah. Which is crazy. And there's some manager who has okay at all this who's in a lot of shit right now. Probably, yeah. But it doesn't, it's pretty bold given. that most ticket holders should have been pre-purchased.
Starting point is 00:45:30 So I think they're assuming that all 500-day tickets are going to be purchased, which at its maximum is going to bring 15 grand, which is still not enough. So it's not good planning, but do you hear the people sing? And they're refunding most of the people like a lot of... Oh yeah, they said like donate. It's just to like cover us for this one-off payment and then we'll refund you. How do you refund everyone in cash?
Starting point is 00:45:57 Yeah, you don't. So, attendees at the con and people following on Tumba were asked to donate. Many people made donations via PayPal. We have that available tonight as well, if you want. Thank you. And someone walked around with a paper bag collecting cash. And they did promise to refund everyone who'd loaned them the $17,000, including those who donated in cash,
Starting point is 00:46:24 but there was no written proof of anything. And there's no evidence to say that anybody got their refunds. I think that it later was in some small print that if you'd donate it on PayPal, you'd get it back. But I don't know that that happened. So that's fine. A secondhand report from one of the attendees who talked to the staff says that the hotel requested the payment when the organizer could not fulfill the room block they'd agreed with the hotel management. So they'd also said, like, we're having like 7,000 people come, put aside some rooms for us. 7,000 of your finest rooms, please.
Starting point is 00:46:58 And then like three people have booked. Yeah, it was about 15% of what they were pretty confident they were going to get. So the hotel were like, hey, you owe us some cash. And I hate to side with hotels, but that's not unreasonable. Hate to side with hotels. Those dogs. Everyone has evil hotels. Those absolute dogs.
Starting point is 00:47:18 So the podcast I mentioned before, welcome to Night Vale. They were obviously invited to the convention. they were a big selling point for a lot of people attending. They arrived, but they pulled out when organisers were unable to pay for their flights, hotel or performance fee. They arrived. Yeah, they got there. And then their rooms were not paid for. The performance fee was not possible.
Starting point is 00:47:44 Oh, man, I hope this goes the way that we would do it. No one knows what they look like. We're welcome to Nightvale all of a sudden. I've never heard, to be honest, I've never heard it before but I assume it's something like, Welcome to Dive Bay. Yes, I am the host of the show. And I reckon we could play our way through it.
Starting point is 00:48:10 Should we do it now? Have you ever heard it? Yeah, ages ago, about that long ago. Well, you could host then. Okay. But you were doing a great job though. Was that basically it? Basically it.
Starting point is 00:48:21 Oh, we've got to check what's happening in the local town. tonight. It's not vaguely on track there. Yeah, yeah. Oh, I'm off to do my shopping. I've got a list. Better not forget the milk. Something like that?
Starting point is 00:48:36 Yeah. Oh, it's spooky milk. Is it stuff like that? Spooky milk, that's about right. It's like dull but spooky. Yeah. I have no idea. That feels right.
Starting point is 00:48:49 Yeah, feels right. Feels right to us, yeah. Any welcome to Nightvelle. fans in Oh big fans I think that might have been a mouse husband Yeah
Starting point is 00:49:02 I do A ghost mouse husband I do Anyway Jesus Christ So they've said We're not going on Because you haven't given us
Starting point is 00:49:20 anything to be here Yeah this is bullshit And the organisers responded on their official Tumblr That they did have money to pay the cast but had technical difficulties that prevented it from happening.
Starting point is 00:49:31 So they're being very unreasonable. Yeah. Of course we do. There's just technical difficulties. Yeah. Like with the payment? Technical difficulties, David. A staff member posted on their personal tumbler
Starting point is 00:49:43 that the cast of Welcome to Night Vale lied and that they actually were paid but chose to leave anyway. That's such a great way to do it. That's awesome. We should have done that. This is fun, but if we could have just not Been here.
Starting point is 00:49:59 How good without it? That would have been great. Yeah. What would we be doing right now? Four. So many things. So, yeah. So many fun and interesting things.
Starting point is 00:50:08 Yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely. Hard to list them all. Yeah, wow. Oh, for Saturday night. Me? Yeah, you're wild. Oh, just partying. I'll say there's nothing illegal.
Starting point is 00:50:25 Never. Never. Should be illegal the way we do it, man. Because we do it so badly? Yeah. It's an obstruction of justice. Anyway, so apparently the cast just went and got themselves an Airbnb, and other guests of the convention also left and went and crashed with them,
Starting point is 00:50:51 including the artist I mentioned before, N.D. Stevenson, who I read had to moderate his own panel because the schedule moderator just didn't turn up. So it's a panel interviewing you and you have to do it yourself. I'll take this one. Great question, yes. Oh, that's a good one. I hadn't thought about that before.
Starting point is 00:51:13 Awful. Organizers offered various prizes to attendees who'd paid for tickets for the panel. They probably wanted a refund, but they're like, no, no, we'll give you a prize, including, and this brings us to a very important part of the story, one of the prizes was an extra hour with the ball pit. with the ball pit is awesome
Starting point is 00:51:34 you can do whatever you want with it we'll turn around yeah and that's an hour yeah I don't know if you'd been picturing a ball pit but there was one okay extra hour with the ball pit
Starting point is 00:51:49 oh I want to be very clear the ballpret was free an hour is a long time to spend in a ball pit but an extra hour that's you time now are you picture in quite a large ball pit. Like, way bigger than this room.
Starting point is 00:52:07 Like huge. Like Olympic-sized swimming pools, what I'm imagining. Am I off? Is it even bigger? It's even bigger. It's like a kitty pool. It's a kiddie pool that they put some balls out. An Olympic-sized kitty pool?
Starting point is 00:52:24 I think you could fit about six people. Well, that's why you need an extra hour. You have to wait your turn. Exactly right. It was also in another giant empty room. That's art I welcome you to pull your phones out and Google dashcon kitty pool
Starting point is 00:52:40 because it's the grimest thing ever and it's so funny If you do Google it, show it around to people around you I meant to have it up to show you guys But it's very funny stuff So yeah, you could win If you didn't get to go to the show you paid money for You could get in the ball pit
Starting point is 00:52:58 Yeah, but not complaining you win the chance To get in the ball pit Which you could do anyway. You could absolutely have done at any time. Because I'm imagining it's not a huge cue. No, no line. No line whatsoever. Nobody wants to get in the ball pit.
Starting point is 00:53:13 There are rumours that someone pissed in the ball pit. Oh yeah. That's as you'd expect. It's hard to describe how shit it is, though. Pass your phone back. So you'll get it back. We promise you'll get it back. It's really grim.
Starting point is 00:53:29 I'm loving seeing phones showed around. See, this is community. Honestly, if you haven't said it, we could probably fit four of those on this stage. That's how, yeah. If it could hold six people, we're comfy in there, you know? It's not even blown up. No, it was blown up at the start of the day.
Starting point is 00:53:49 Yeah. It deflated a little. But for me, a winner's a win. I'm using my full hour in that ball pit. No, no, not in it. With it, with it. People come home and like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. You just get to stand next to sort of padding it.
Starting point is 00:54:05 Ooh, easy girl, easy. Ooh. Easy girl. So as you can imagine, the ball pit became an instant meme. It took over the internet. Within a couple of days, a video game developer had created DashCon Simulator 2014. That's very good. It was just a simulation of a big empty room with a ball pit in it.
Starting point is 00:54:40 I love the internet. Oh, man. So the convention wasn't exactly what the organisers or the attendees had hoped for. Response to the convention was mainly critical, with some speculating that it was a scam, while others thought it wasn't malicious. It was just the result of poor management or incompetence. They were being ambitious, but maybe not quite pulling it off.
Starting point is 00:55:04 The organises' lack of experience has been criticised, as it has led to questionable decisions such as setting a comparatively high ticket price for a fan-run convention announcing a partnership with actor Misha Collins's not-profit organisation random acts despite that not being true. They had not partnered with them.
Starting point is 00:55:21 Only releasing 500 daily tickets which would have made it almost impossible to achieve their projected five to seven thousand dollar aim attendant, sorry, not dollar. So they were selling out basically just they had captains it way too low?
Starting point is 00:55:37 No, because a lot of the people that attended had bought tickets ahead of time. Then they were at 500 at the door. Which they weren't selling anyway. They weren't selling anyway. But if they were hoping to have 7,000 people in attendance, why are you capping the daily at 500? You know, just the math ain't mathen.
Starting point is 00:55:57 And that's coming from me. Okay. You didn't have to laugh that. I know what I'm about. Anyway, a former committee member had posted their personal experience of the preparations that went into the convention
Starting point is 00:56:12 claiming poor communication, lack of transparency, unrealistic goals such as trying to get Dylan O'Brien from Teen Wolf. Oh my God. Now I know why you pick this topic, Jess. Who's that? No, don't worry about it.
Starting point is 00:56:26 She only talks about him all the time. You don't listen. This isn't the movie version, obviously. No, it's the TV series that was around that time. Yeah, right. Fair enough. It had fans on Tumblr.
Starting point is 00:56:41 But they also, like, they had this goal of getting Tom Hiddleston from the Marvel movies. Like, we could get Loki. They could not get Loki. Oh. They could have at least aimed for someone in their country. Why'd they go for an English guy? You know what I mean? It's probably an Illinois.
Starting point is 00:56:58 Illinois. What the fuck would that be? Illinois-I? Illinoisian. What was it? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:57:16 Yeah. Well, that really shortened it, so you can understand why I didn't realize. You should have one of the local... Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. One of the Edmund. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:57:28 Yep. Yeah. I reckon he was answering a different question. You still with us? Yeah. He's a friend leading over. Do you want to leave? Yep.
Starting point is 00:57:40 Yeah. Okay, so just to wrap it up, some attendees claim that the outside reaction is overblown and it's exaggerated and that even those who found the convention chaotic said they had a good time. They had a bit of fun. It's way better than some of the disasters we've talked about. Oh, totally. Fire festival? We're like stuck on an island? Woodstock 99.
Starting point is 00:58:03 Woodstock 69. We did another woodstock, I reckon. But pretty much all those ones were overcrowded. That sounds luxurious. Yeah, yeah. And a lot of people are staying at this quite nice hotel. Yeah. Honestly, it seems like a victimless crime
Starting point is 00:58:18 because the only victim is a hotel and they are obviously evil. Obviously. Any hoteliers? Good. Yeah, so they're like, the staff were nice. They were doing their best. We got to, you know, we had a bit of fun.
Starting point is 00:58:34 But it wasn't a convention convention. You know what I mean? They're like some of the outside reactions a bit overblown. So they got the 17 grand and they're able to see out the whole weekend? I'm not sure, actually, if the entire weekend went ahead. There seemed to be a lot of...
Starting point is 00:58:51 There was a lot of footage on YouTube of just, like, the organisers sitting at one of the panel tables, like talking to microphones being like, yeah, you know, like, we did our best. We're trying. So I don't think everything that was supposed to happen, happened. At the end of the convention, the organisers announced that they were still going to go ahead
Starting point is 00:59:10 with their plans for a 20. 2015 convention in Indiana. And that did not go ahead. That is surprising. Yeah. But earlier this year in July, dashcon 2
Starting point is 00:59:25 took place in Toronto. Wow. Yeah. Wow. It's about all it it deserves. But I watched a YouTube video about it. And when they said the 550 tickets they made available, I was like, oh, thank God. It had been so really.
Starting point is 00:59:42 reasonable. They're not like 7,000 people. They sold out really quickly of the 550. I think in the end it ended up being more like a thousand people attending and it focused on celebrating a very specific era of fandom culture as well as the original dashcon event. So yes, there was a kiddie pool. They thought that was very important to include, although this one was much bigger. It could fit easily seven to ten people. Oh, okay. Great. It's generally seen as having been very successful, especially compared to the original dashcon. And it also raised $7,000 for the Canadian Cancer Society. Oh, that's great. What a result. So they're apparently keen to hold a third dashcon to be held in 2026 or 2027.
Starting point is 01:00:29 I say we go. Melbourne. I forget where we are. Adelaide. Adelaide. Wow, that'd be huge. We're not going to take another one from you, guys. Don't worry.
Starting point is 01:00:40 You can have this one. I just wanted, like, I didn't entirely know the tone, like, how you guys would receive me just shitting on this convention that seemed to come from quite a nice place. So that's why towards the end, I'm like, and they raise money for cancer cancer? Yeah, great. To be a bit more positive. But I say, long may it rain. Dashcon, come to Adelaide, please. Yes.
Starting point is 01:01:10 Yes. Dashcon Adelaide, 2027. Yes. Let's start the campaign now. Let's do it. We don't have enough time to organise it for next year. That's all I'm too.
Starting point is 01:01:20 Oh yeah, it's November. Yeah, no. Like, honestly, I think... 2030. A city that can put on things like a Christmas parade in November. Yeah. I think that's the kind of town with the kind of the foresight and the big thinking. And what are you thinking?
Starting point is 01:01:35 Maybe you would put it around March when nothing else is going on in the city. Yeah. It is weird that you don't have your Christmas parade on then as well in March. Spread it out a bit, Adelaide. You got so many good things. The year guy, I just said nah. Oh, I heard one little... I agree.
Starting point is 01:02:03 I liked that. Anyway, that's fantastic. Give it up a Jess Pokers and DashCon. Thank you so much. You guys really had to hang in there and you did. Thank you so much. I don't know about you, but I'm going to go home and sign up for Tumblr. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:02:23 It feels like it could be. be big. Yeah. It's coming back. It's coming back. Actually, I logged on and one of my good friends came up on the dashboard, like he's still using it. Regularly. I was like, he just did this the other day. He's posted
Starting point is 01:02:38 like, hello, is anyone listening? Hello? I'm so lonely. I'm trapped in the bathroom. Hello? I'm trapped in the ball pit. I'm trapped with the ball pit. Oh, I love it. That's so good. But I should call.
Starting point is 01:02:54 him. Yeah. Make sure he's like, you're on Tumblr, dude. Is everything okay? Is everything all right? There's other stuff now. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:03:01 Get out there, man. Get out of the bathroom, man. Well, we've had some fun here tonight. Now, honestly, thank you so much for coming out to the Rana Room here on our, on our Saturday night. It's our Saturday night as well. Your Saturday night, we're doing it together. We will be hanging out up the back of the room as you leave. You can either say hello.
Starting point is 01:03:22 Yep. Or, as we always say, awkwardly avoid eye contact. That's totally fine. She's very welcome. That's allowed. We've brought over some merchandise that we had to pay... Legal. Legal?
Starting point is 01:03:33 It's all legal stuff. We did have to pay Jetstar some money to bring it over, though. We've got some tote bags, tour posters, pins. We've got some stickers and some magnets. And you can get one of each in the Dugawan show bag. It's very, very exciting. But you could also just come along and say hello if you like. Or, like we said, we can leave.
Starting point is 01:03:57 You can leave it at some stage. But we like to think... Luckily raise the 17. Yeah, that's right. We need to sell 17K of merch tonight. But before you go, can we please give a big round of applause to Craig and everyone at the Rhino room? Thank you so much.
Starting point is 01:04:08 To Rod on sound. Rod. Good to see you again. And I believe Matt has an announcement. Yeah, what was the venue called Ian Craig that the show's on tonight that I'm doing soon? How long are neat freak? It's like the second week
Starting point is 01:04:28 they've been running this new comedy night there. I'm going to be over there doing 10 minutes of new material and maybe some old material because I'm a coward. But I've been told that anyone here tonight can get $5 tickets on the door if you say that you're coming from the Duguayan show. So
Starting point is 01:04:46 love to see you over there. It should be a lot of fun. It starts at 8 o'clock. Start at 8 o'clock. And it says.com.com.a.u's on as well. and a bunch of locals. It's going to be so much fun. Should be fantastic. That's guaranteed, Craig.
Starting point is 01:04:58 Is that right? Is fun guaranteed? You did seem to dodge the guarantee. Yeah. We've got a guarantee, though. That's on record. I am wearing a wire. Oh, flies at the door.
Starting point is 01:05:20 So you'll have all the info at the door. But please be there. He needs this. We can all walk over and single file, if you like. That's nice. All right, that's the end of the show. Thank you again for coming out, Adelaide. We love you, and we'll see you next time.
Starting point is 01:05:37 Good night. And we're back in the room, and by room, I mean studio. That's right. This room is a studio. This room is a studio. We're back in Melbourne. Thank you so much to the wonderful, oh, that sounded sarcastic, but genuinely, the wonderful audience we had in Adelaide.
Starting point is 01:06:10 Yeah, so much fun. Afterwards, we met a bunch of you on the way out, which is lovely. So nice. And it's great to have to be there at the Rhino Room, which is an iconic comedy venue in Adelaide. I'd never done The Rino Room. Well, now you have, you can tick it off. Isn't that crazy?
Starting point is 01:06:23 Yeah. Because it does feel iconic. And a lot of my, when I was doing more stand-up, a lot of my closest friends were Adelaide and the Rino Room was like a, yeah, it was a sacred ground. So when I was setting up the tech of the gig, Craig, who runs Adelaide Comedy, was helping out, of course, and he's got a projector going. and he's got 15 or 20 years. No, they celebrated 20 years last, last Adelaide French.
Starting point is 01:06:47 Anyway, two decades worth of photos that it just randomly plays on the projector for like hundreds of hours. And it's amazing how the people that have been there. The big names. Yeah. And also just other people that grew up in Adelaide have since gone on to do really massive things. Yeah, so nice. It's a really a great place that nurtures a lot of local talent as well.
Starting point is 01:07:07 So it was an honour to be there. and what a hot crowd. It was so nice. It was a really fun, very receptive crowd. We loved your vibe. Loved seeing there's a point where I was like, show other people around you if you're going to Google the kitty pool, show the others.
Starting point is 01:07:23 And I could just see phones being like shown around and passed around. And I was like, this is a nice. A little ripples of laugh. Nice sense of community. See how crappy the trampoline was. So funny. And then afterwards, you and I, of course, went back to our hotel room. Yep.
Starting point is 01:07:35 We had these little single bed side by side, but it was so close we could reach out. It was weird, yeah. I feel like we, yeah, yep. But we enjoyed some fantastic pizza. Yes. And couldn't get the built-in crime cast to the hotel TV to work. So instead of watching the movie we planned to watch,
Starting point is 01:07:51 we just watched four episodes back-to-back of House Hunters International. And it was honestly a perfect night. It was so great. Then you got the pods out, the Mars bar pods. Yes, for dessert. That was delicious. And then... Got up early the next morning to fly home.
Starting point is 01:08:06 That's right. What a joy. Thank you for having us, Adelaide. What a beautiful city. Yeah, a very nice place. But that brings us to the section of the show where we like to spend a bit of time thanking the wonderful people who support us on Patreon.com slash do go on pod. There's a bunch of different levels on there, a bunch of different rewards.
Starting point is 01:08:25 Like what, Davy Boy? You can get four bonus episodes every single month as well as access to the back catalog of nearly 300 bonus episodes and they'll go for at least an hour each, really on average. So there's hundreds of hours of bonus stuff there. You can also be in the Facebook group, which is a beautiful place to be. Believe us, it's the only thing keeping us on Facebook. 100%. You can also hear about live shows before anyone else, get discount tickets, vote on topics.
Starting point is 01:08:50 Yeah. This one was voted for on Patreon. That's right. And it won an absolute landslide. And also, more recently, videos. That's right. You haven't mentioned the videos or ad free and or ad free. Because the videos are ad free.
Starting point is 01:09:03 And also, we put out an audio version ad free of the ad free. of the episodes. We haven't been doing the audio for about a year now. But you can watch us now. Watch this whole thing. That's right. Well, actually... Not this one. Sorry, not this one. Not the live ones, because traveling to state, we're already bringing a full suitcase full of audio tech, a full suitcase full of merch. We can't do cameras and stuff as well. Sorry.
Starting point is 01:09:22 Sorry. Sorry about that. But it's... Trust us. It's not worth it. So what we're going to do now is a little section of the show that is affectionately a called fact quota question and I think it has a little jingle that goes a little something like this fact quote or question you were about to sing it yes I nearly I nearly went to autopilot and decided seeing what how would that be autopilot for you you never sing it I have always sung it
Starting point is 01:09:50 yeah but at home I sing it now go for it fact quote a question yeah I should let you do it damn it yes it would have sucked I would have voice of an angel thank you so a dying angel thank you so much And this is where people on the arsprud, no, no, Shineberg level or above, correct? That's right. Get to give us a fact, a quote, a question, a brag, a suggestion, some gossip, a recipe, a joke. It can be literally anything. And I've got a couple of people giving us fact quotes or questions this week.
Starting point is 01:10:25 Dave, are you ready? I am so ready for these facts, quotes. End of questions. Okay, our first one comes from Katie Stackow. who has given, oh, you get to give yourself a title as well. Katie's title is
Starting point is 01:10:36 Superior Sniffer of Grape-derived fermented liquid. Okay. I can't for the life of me figure out what she's talking about, but... But keep sniffing. Keep sniffing.
Starting point is 01:10:45 And Katie's giving us a fact. And the fact is, this might be a fact, depending on your strict criteria of a fact. Okay, very strict over here. Very interesting. I'm looking ahead.
Starting point is 01:10:56 I haven't read any of this, but it's a bit long. Let's see if there's a fact in here. Somewhere in here, That might be a fact. I once had an old Alaska native traditional chief of the Gwichan Nation living eight miles north of the Arctic Circle. Tell me a story of how he was cured from a stomach ulcer he suffered from by adding porcupine shit to a hot stew. Oh my gosh.
Starting point is 01:11:20 He claimed that after tripping out for a few hours and a solid night's rest, he was completely healed of his ailment. You can imagine my disbelief. However could animal waste possibly have medicinal qualities? Here is where the fact comes in. A staple of the porcupine's diet is bark from the birch tree. The birch tree generates a pitch that has antiseptic and anti-microbriol. I've always struggled with that. Anti-microbial characteristics.
Starting point is 01:11:47 You might call it nature's neosporan. The healing qualities are attributed to its active compounds, particularly the tritapines, butylene and butelonic acid. Back to maybe this is. the fact, the chief told me that the healing properties of the birch pitch ingested by porcupine were concentrated in the animal's turds, making it a perfect medicine. Now, I'm not sure why he didn't just ingest the pitch directly as they make syrup out of the stuff, so it's got to taste a heck of a lot better than dung. Porkupine shit, it's a hell of a drug,
Starting point is 01:12:20 folks. This should not be considered medical advice in any way, shape or form, you know, disclosure. So that's important. There you go. Do you think there's a fact in there? Yeah, that Pokemon shit can be medicinal. Can be medicinal. And we are doctor so we can say. Yeah, I agree with that. And also, like, not saying that it would taste better than Pokemon shit,
Starting point is 01:12:40 unless you've eaten it. Yeah, how do you know? We don't know. Let's not knock at a toy toy. Try it. Never know. Maybe add it to a stew for flavor as well. There's that, you know, very highly sought after coffee that is made from beans that
Starting point is 01:12:51 animals shit out. Yeah. So, you know? Only coffee I'll drink. Poor coffee. No, poo coffee. Every time we go out for coffee, and it's often, and it's the same cafe most weeks. But Dave's always like, you guys got poo coffee?
Starting point is 01:13:04 I'll just go through the minute. Has an animal pooed this? Oh, no? No, I'll have a matcher then. Animal pooed? Pancake, animal pooed this? Has an animal pooed this? Oh.
Starting point is 01:13:15 So do you like eggs then? Yeah, I guess so. It feels like animals. It's close to a pulling. Animals has cloacked this. An animal has clotched this. Has an animal poo to collect to this? Thank you so much.
Starting point is 01:13:26 Extend the definition. Thank you, Katie. Yeah, that's a good one. Hey, I've got to tell you, if it works, it works. Yes. It works. If it works, it works. I'm fine with, with, what's the word I'm looking for?
Starting point is 01:13:38 Plessibos. Oh, okay, sorry. I'm fine with poo. I'm fine with placebos. Yeah. If they work. Next up, if they work, is Matt number one. Matt number one is giving themselves a title Tinder profile manager for sexually active popes.
Starting point is 01:13:54 I like that a lot. That's really good. And Matt number one is given us a question. The question is, what is something you misunderstood for way too long? As always, as we always ask people who ask questions to answer it themselves if they want to. Matt has done that. Examples for me, I always thought the phrase was for all intensive purposes. That's a common run, I reckon.
Starting point is 01:14:14 Not all intents and purposes. Probably because I first heard it in a cleaning product, in a cleaning products as a kid. Hmm. Oh, like in an ad or something? Maybe. As someone who has lived in Brisbane all their lives, I always thought... Or maybe is, or do they do, like that's their joke tagline for all intensive purposes. Yes, probably.
Starting point is 01:14:35 Yeah, okay. Probably. Matt goes on. As someone who's lived in Brisbane all their lives, I always thought there was a music stadium in Sydney, branded by the Maya department store, the Sydney Mya Music Bowl. One day while working in Melbourne, a colleague said, let's go to a concert at the Sydney Mya Music Bowl. I commented that they must be a keen fan to go to Sydney on a work night and be back on the job at six the next morning. very confused looks.
Starting point is 01:14:58 Yeah, Sydney Mya Music Ball is named after Sydney Meyer. That's right. It's an S-I. And is in Melbourne. And is in Melbourne. That's the confusion. You're telling a Melbourne person, oh, they're going to Sydney for that when it's like, no, there.
Starting point is 01:15:09 Tonight, you're going to go to the gig tonight of Sydney. Right next to the city. Easily accessible. Very accessible, yes. Yeah. Yep. I think I've walked home from there once. That's cool.
Starting point is 01:15:18 I've walked home from there too. It's a long walk. On New Year's Eve. Yeah. Went to that, when the Falls Festival fell over and they had to do it at the, which is usually like out camping. Yes. For maybe fire reasons or something.
Starting point is 01:15:30 Yeah. They had to do it in the city, so I saw the Arctic Monkeys headline at midnight. Was it COVID reasons maybe? Oh, maybe it was. Maybe. Fireworks went off over the city, which is great because you're right there. Beautiful. They come back on and play another few songs and then I'm walking home.
Starting point is 01:15:41 Walking home. Beautiful. Gorgeous. Something you misunderstood for way too long. I just remembered one for a long time. Like, embarrassingly long. New South Wales. Yes.
Starting point is 01:15:54 I spelled that with an H. Wales, not as in it's named after the country, Wales. How long? Like into Adel. Wales, New South Wales. Yeah, whatever. And I never even thought about it. I'm like, hang on a second.
Starting point is 01:16:07 Wales. Wales. Yeah. I'm only laughing because it's you and your... And geography. You're very good at geography and you're very smart. Yeah, stupid stuff. But that's the thing.
Starting point is 01:16:22 There are just like gaps in all of our knowledge. Yeah. When you just like, because one of those things you just don't think about again. Yes. And let me ask you what came first. Wales or Wales? Country. No, the animal.
Starting point is 01:16:36 The animal. Oh, pause. Animal. It's not a riddle. I agree. They're really old and really big. They're really old and really big. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:16:44 And Wales is the country really old. Yeah, but not very big. Not very big. Compared to other countries. Correct. I think for me, the one that pops into my head is, You know if you go to like a fancy restaurant and you get a digger station menu? It's like a tasting menu.
Starting point is 01:17:00 You know, they sort of bring stuff out for you. There might even be like paired wines and stuff like that. I thought until I saw it written down, that was Digger Station. Digger station. Yeah, I thought it was Digger. D I-W-G-E-R kind of like. Station. That's great.
Starting point is 01:17:18 For a while. Then I saw it written down at a restaurant and was like, oh. I went so. It's not Digger Station. But if I was just saying, I'll have the digger station. Yeah, you'd get away with that. But in your mind, what was it conjuring up the image? Diggers.
Starting point is 01:17:32 Okay. Yeah. The Anzax. Digging out of station? Our boss. Yeah, I've no idea. I don't know why I thought it was called that. I never looked into the backstory.
Starting point is 01:17:42 And if I had, I would have figured out it's not called a digger station. That's so good. There's lots of things. Yeah, I'm sure I'll be thinking of some of the drive home today and be like, oh, yeah. Remember when you didn't know that? Yeah. You're an idiot. Same with like the honk if you're horny or those sort of bumper stickers.
Starting point is 01:17:58 Like the point of those is that if someone's honking at you, it's sort of a joke on them. You know? You're like, oh, I guess you're horny. I was like, that's pretty funny. Then people could walk along and go, you know, because they're horny. That's not quite how it's supposed to work. Anyway, thank you to Matt No. 1 and Katie Stacow for those wonderful facts, quotes or questions. Thank you so much.
Starting point is 01:18:21 next thing we need to do what episode are we doing here yes I figured it out so the next thing we like to do is we usually do a bit of a shoutout and we make a bit of a game of it Dave that is correct and this week we were talking about dashcon
Starting point is 01:18:36 fantastic conference around Tumblr do you have any ideas maybe we could do like what convention they're attending or like starting they're on the planning committee for a particular convention of something Okay.
Starting point is 01:18:52 Do it take turns? Oh, take turns. Sorry, I just got really emotional. I don't take turns. I just love conventions. Or do you want to go like half and half? Oh, we can take it in turns, do you reckon? Let's do it.
Starting point is 01:19:02 It's just every time we try to take it in turns, we forget where we're up to, but I think we can do this. Right, because there's only two of us. You kick it off. From Pasco Vale here in Victoria. Hello and thank you to Craig. Baked potatoes. Really?
Starting point is 01:19:15 He's on the convention on the board. The baked potato convention. Wow, do you reckon there's sort of like. Like the spudfest cheese section over here, sour cream section here. Yes. Whether you want meats. Yep. Beans.
Starting point is 01:19:27 Wow. Whether you're a sweet potato kind of person. Yeah. White potato. Yep. Yams. Yams. Wow.
Starting point is 01:19:34 Could be anything. Love it. Yeah, it's going to be big. And I can ask Jess, how did you come up with that one? I'd rather you not ask, Dave. I'm still full from lunch. Okay. Next I would like to thank.
Starting point is 01:19:45 Oh, actually, I've already done it. See? See? We fuck it immediately. Oh, no. I feel like it. Next, I would like to thank... I'd like to thank them as well, to be clear.
Starting point is 01:19:54 From address unknown, we can only assume deep within the fortress and the malls. Naomi. Naomi is a convention for stapler. Oh, the stapler car. Yes, they're stapler a car. Oh, would they also have stuff like staple removers? Oh, no, that's anti. Right.
Starting point is 01:20:10 What about hole punches? Yeah, whole punch. I feel like anything that, they want something that puts a hole in. But not takes a hole out. Not takes a hole out. Sounds weird, doesn't it? Does. Takes a hole out?
Starting point is 01:20:20 Yeah, they feel weird about the tagline, but they've printed a thousand posters. Wow. What kind of size venue are they? 10,000. It's quite big. Stapler Khan. Stapler Khan, 2025. Go to our new year.
Starting point is 01:20:35 They tour as well. Oh, they're full time. Yeah, it's pretty massive. Yeah, they got the big names of staplers. Oh, yeah, who have you got? You got Hover's Works. Yep. She's a blue one.
Starting point is 01:20:48 Anko. Anko, that's a good one. There's got to be an Anko stapler. Yeah. Thank you, Naomi. Next up, I would like to thank from Brisbane in Queensland. Thank you to Pete Moffat. Dream Catchers.
Starting point is 01:21:00 Oh, that's good. Yeah. Did you have a dream catcher at all growing up? Yeah, we made them in primary school, but I was sick that day. So then my mum bought me one, and the bought one was way better than anything I could have made. So much better. It was so good. It was like purple, beautiful.
Starting point is 01:21:15 Loved it. And caught all my dreams. Yeah, everyone else's dreams was shit. I haven't dream since. Yeah. Because you threw it away. I don't have dreams. Can you get a dream catch?
Starting point is 01:21:24 I don't have goals, sort of aspirations. Or because you threw it away. Yeah. Foolish. I would like to thank from Katie in Texas. Shikata Kida, is that something? Not for me. You got to go watch Blues Brothers, my friend.
Starting point is 01:21:43 Anna Oaks. Anna Oaks, convention of seashells. Whoa. Yeah, like really big. ones, really small ones, really rare ones. Okay. What about like kind of broken ones, but still mostly in part. I feel bad about this, but one of my great guilty pleasures is walking along the beach if there's a lot of seashells washed up and just crunching them. Is that bad? I think I'm just making more sand. True, but then what about homes for crabs? Or what about shells for
Starting point is 01:22:10 people who collect shells? I feel bad for the people that collect shells. Do you also just walk along and stomp on snails? You psycho? No, but I like a crunchy leaf. Sure. And a stick. Love a crunch. you love to step on a snail. No, because... You don't do it on purpose. No, actually, I feel so bad, but I'm... If it's dark and it's been raining, you hear the crunch and you go, oh, God.
Starting point is 01:22:27 I'm so sorry. I can't look back. I'm so sorry. Yeah, you feel nothing about the shells? Yeah. Okay. I mean, if I looked down and there was a hermit crab inside, yes, I would feel bad. So you're walking along the beach in shoes?
Starting point is 01:22:40 Yeah, it's like a winter, a winter activity. I will say, I'm not doing it anymore because I feel bad about it, but it's like, I still love the crunch. I miss the crunch. Yeah, sure. Okay. It's a childlike thing. I can't quite look at you, but...
Starting point is 01:22:54 Am I a monster, everyone? Am I a monster? I think I was making more sand. Let's move on and thank someone, Dave. The world needs sand. I can't look at you anymore. Oh my gosh, we need for sand pits. That's just for children and dogs to piss in. Next up I'll like to think.
Starting point is 01:23:10 From Modesto in California, it's William Ramesburg. William Ramesberg. The sunglasses convention. Oh, so cool. Yeah. We've both got sunglasses on the table. You'd never... Well, yeah, because we went to the convention.
Starting point is 01:23:26 Yeah. Oh, wow, I've got these sort of sleek number. Yeah. Make me look like I ride a motorcycle in 1960s. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Every time you put that on, I go, is James Dean here? Oh, my God, I say.
Starting point is 01:23:40 And then I go, oh, it's Dave. It's just... Dave getting out of his very sensible car. Yeah, a very sensible family car. Oh, oh. Oh. Politely. It's a station wagging.
Starting point is 01:23:49 Politely crossing the road. Oh. Oh. Oh. Well, my friend Dave waving at me. Hello. Why is he waving? So disappointed.
Starting point is 01:24:01 Oh my God. Oh. Oh, I see. It's just my colleague who I expected to see here. Thank you, William. I would love to thank from El Paso, Texas. Autumn. Autumn.
Starting point is 01:24:14 Love the name autumn, can I just say. Autumn. Beautiful. Beautiful name. But Australians shorten everything. We'd probably call them like, like, Audi. Like, we'd kind of, we ruin everything. I quite like Aorty.
Starting point is 01:24:22 Me too, actually. Yeah. I just, I rift it and I like it. Yeah. Tum, Tummy. Tumny. Tumny. But Autumn's a lovely name.
Starting point is 01:24:31 And Autumn is the convention for, and this is good for tonight, big New Year's Eve, Fireworks. Oh. When the episode comes out as New Year's Eve. That fucking rules. Firewarks convention. I'd love to go to that. Yeah, that'd be so far. I love fireworks.
Starting point is 01:24:48 Yeah. Like I have a, I turn into a child when fireworks, on because we can see the city fireworks from our house so anytime there's an event that has fireworks moonbar new year's a big concert at the mcg i can see them and i'll be sitting on the couch just watching tv and i can see them just oh my eyes will dart over and there's and i'm straight to the window going oh oh oh fireworks fireworks fireworks i love them that's great i used to dream about being proposed to during fireworks i love fireworks really did that happen i never got proposed to so There's still time.
Starting point is 01:25:24 There's still time. Notice. Woo! I've just realized that tonight's the anniversary of me seeing the Arctic Monkeys at the music as well because it was a new Zee from the fireworks. Oh my God. Did you propose?
Starting point is 01:25:36 I did. To Alex, the singer of the Arctic Monkeys. He couldn't see me. I was so far away. Oh, it's so disappointing. Next up, I'd like to thank from a location that is unknown to us probably deep within the fortress of the malls as we speak.
Starting point is 01:25:47 Nick Livermore. Nick Livermore. The Harmony convention. Oh, that's good. I would love that. To sing your way in? Oh, gorgeous. Well, no, you have to, you have to harmonize your way in. They'll give you a note and you have to, yeah, that's nice. That's beautiful. And they say, come on in. Come on in. That'll be $50. You have to pay as well. Of course you do. Unless you sound really good.
Starting point is 01:26:10 Yeah, unless you, yeah. There's a few people that. And they go, come right in. Yeah. Please, it's an honor to have you. Yeah. I would, is it me? Yes. I would also love to thank also from Deep Within the Fortress of the Moles. Paul van der Malen. Paul Van der Melan is the chair of the maps convention. Maps convention. You'd love that. I would. Oh, you'd see some old maps.
Starting point is 01:26:34 Yes. I used to sometimes go to a map shop with my dad because he was into car rallying as a navigator. You have to get specific maps for the rallies that they do. And you go and then there'd be like dozens of globes and all the different kinds. Yeah. Does that map shop still exist? Was it in Chadston? There was a map shop.
Starting point is 01:26:51 Oh, no, it wasn't inside a shopping center. No, no. Oh, there was a map shop. It wasn't at Chadston Shopping Center. It was in, it was on like Waverley Road. Oh my God, I reckon that's it. Yeah. Used to drive past it all the time.
Starting point is 01:27:02 Let me look it up. Waverly Road. I think it was Waverly Road. Yeah. Waverly Road and Warrigal. Melbourne Map Center? Possibly. Established 1981.
Starting point is 01:27:12 Shopfront closed 2017. Yeah. So I worked at Chadson Fashion Capital and lived in that area. I would drive past that map shop all the time. Oh, damn. Oh, look at this. There's a blog. with all the folks. Like, that's what I'm talking about. Yeah, wow.
Starting point is 01:27:25 Full of maps. Obviously, the people running it were very into maps. Of course. I was fascinated as a child. It actually tracks so beautifully that your dad would be into like rally car driving as a navigator. Yes, well, that's because before we were born or whatever, he had the car and all that sort of stuff. Sick. Yeah, he, oh man, historic rallying. He's very into that. For old cars, but then, um, sold the car once the kids came along and there's been, And kids came and ruined everything. Sorry, Dad. Took away his passion.
Starting point is 01:27:55 But he's also won a bunch of rallies as a navigator. That's cool. I didn't know that. Yeah. So he likes to go fast. Yes, he does. I think I could, yeah, I don't know if, oh, would I be the driver or the navigator? I'm not very good at navigating.
Starting point is 01:28:07 I'd have to be the driver. Damn. Yeah, I imagine you'd be getting quite carcic looking down at the map telling it. True. What's coming up next? I prefer to drive. You need to be in charge. Do you want to be my navigator?
Starting point is 01:28:17 Yes. Would you trust me? Yes. Would you actually? I would trust you with the map. Yeah. Would you trust me to drive? Yeah. Oh, I'd probably have to learn manual.
Starting point is 01:28:25 I give up on this new dream already. I told you I don't have dreams. Fair enough. All right, one last one I think. To bring this home, am I correct? Yes, from a location that is unknown to us as well. Probably listening right now in the fortress. Cabin Lab or in the cabin.
Starting point is 01:28:41 Cabin Lab. Oh, that's nice. Surfing convention. Surfing. It's a coastal cabin. Oh, I love it. Yeah. Like within walking distance of the beach?
Starting point is 01:28:48 Oh, yeah, absolutely. Just across the road. That's so good. Nice little part. into a gorgeous beach. Take your board. Sunny day. And do they have that sort of wave pool that you can surf?
Starting point is 01:28:59 Yeah. Urban surf. It's called the ocean. But at the convention. Or is that at the beach too? Oh, at the convention, definitely. That's where the convention is being held. Is it an urban surf.
Starting point is 01:29:07 Beautiful. Chris Hemsworth's there. Of course he is. Liam, maybe if he's a free. Really? And the other one? Luke's invited. Great.
Starting point is 01:29:14 But he's too busy. Has an RSVP. That's huge. Thank you to Cabin Lab. Paul, Nick, Autumn, William, Anna, Pete, Naomi and Craig. And the final thing we need to do, Davy, see if there's anybody to induct into the Trip Ditch Club. It looks like we do have a few, actually. This is our Hall of Fame or our Clubhouse for people who've been supporting the show
Starting point is 01:29:36 on the shout-out level or above for three consecutive years. They've never dropped off. They've stayed true. They've already had a shout-out a couple years back. But now, to enshrine them forever, their name goes up on the wall. We welcome them into the club. It's a bit of a theatre to the mind. But once you're in, you can never leave. Yeah. Why would you want to? Why would you want to? It's got everything you need. The toilets are fixed. They're fixed? Yes. Thank goodness because New Year's Eve, they're going to be busy. Yeah, and I've had a lot of dairy. Yeah. Which is good.
Starting point is 01:30:01 Well, it doesn't typically impact me too much. Yes. But I've had a lot. Oh, okay. Right. Enough that would make anyone quite ill. Yes. Yeah, yeah. In fact, it might not even be about the dairy. Yeah. It's just the quantity of anything. It's liquid intake. Yeah. I assume it's milk. Mm-mm. Just lead. Oh, okay. Sour cream. Oh, great. I've had a lot of sour cream just as is. Sounds like warm?
Starting point is 01:30:24 Yeah. And you always organise a food, food or a drink. Wow. Why do you think there's so much sour cream? No, it's New Year's. So we're having, we've got champagne. Oh, cheers. Got cocktails.
Starting point is 01:30:37 Beautiful. We've got sex on the beach. Oh, fun me. And a drink. Bit of fun. I love my drink at first. I got sparklers. They're too hot.
Starting point is 01:30:47 They are. Those things are hotter than the sun are. Yeah, they are. fact. They are very dangerous. Is that a fact? Hotter than the sun? That can't be, David.
Starting point is 01:30:56 Well, I'm thinking of, I think that's lightning. Lightning is hotter than the sun. But people have been struck by lightning. There's a website called Wedding Day Sparklers. Sparklers versus Sun discover the heat differences. Are sparklers hotter than the sun, or is this a myth? It is a myth. At the end of the day, it's unequivocally true that the sparklers are not high temperature
Starting point is 01:31:14 than the sun. I have heard that before. But you thought people were putting something in their child's birthday cake that was hotter than the sun, David. Someone else has written. The sparklers burn at high temperatures as hot as 1,800 to 3,000 degrees Fahrenheit,
Starting point is 01:31:31 which is 1,000 to 1,600 degrees Celsius, responsible for 16% of legal fire-related injuries in the US. They are really hot. I'm not saying they aren't hot. Are you hearing me? You would not put something in your child's birthday cake that is as hot as the sun. But would you put something in child's birthday cake?
Starting point is 01:31:51 It is 1,500 degrees. Even that's insane. Oh, yeah, that's crazy. What are we doing? That's crazy. But we're all adults, so we've got them for New Year's. Woo! Happy news, everyone.
Starting point is 01:31:59 I'm going to play Old Langsign. Oh, and you know who's going to be taking the stage at midnight after Old Langsign? Who? You're never going to believe it. What? This is, of course, after a money was about DashCon. Yes. And I've booked.
Starting point is 01:32:11 You're never going to believe it. Dashboard Confessional. No fucking way. Didn't you believe it. Can we? Can we? Can for one night. We rename them dashboard convention.
Starting point is 01:32:24 Yes, we can. Conventional if they want. Conventional if they want that. Please. Wow. That's good stuff. Please welcome to the stage. Dashboard conventional.
Starting point is 01:32:33 That's great. What an absolute get. Now, I'll play the role of Matt this week then. We'd never mention that Matt's not here. Oh, yes. Imagine if he was here this whole time and he'd just been quiet. We turned his mind. Finally, it was quiet.
Starting point is 01:32:45 That's so funny. He didn't have a coffee and this is what happens. I know Matt's not here. So what I will be doing. is playing the role of Matt, which is lifting the velvet rope, welcoming people in. You'll hype them up. I'll then hype you up. We'll just get a nice flow going without Matt here going,
Starting point is 01:33:00 I think I could do better than that, actually. And then he doesn't. And then he doesn't. He does something that's a bit shit. And we go, okay, yeah. Oh, go for the most obvious joke. Fantastic. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:33:09 Dave's going for something creative and original. Yeah, like maybe the fourth or fifth most obvious joke. Okay. Pretty good. Are you ready? I'm ready. Let's do this. So, welcome into the Triptitch Club, the following people.
Starting point is 01:33:19 Well, first up from Bradford in Great Britain, it's Kaylean. Oh, I've really thought you're going to go with Kaleen. It's not Kailene. Fine. Kaly Ann, Kaly Ann, Kalyann, Kalyann, Kalyann, I'm a fan. I'm begging of you, please don't take my man. I really, like, I want to support you. I thought, I'm almost, why would that be Kaleen?
Starting point is 01:33:43 I don't know, but if it was Kailene, can you see how good Jane, Jolene would be? I was thinking about James Dean, that was my backup. You should have just sung. Kaleen anyway. I thought Kalyann was funny because it doesn't work. Okay, next up from... But Kaley-Anne, I'm your number one fan. That's great stuff.
Starting point is 01:33:58 Woo! From Camberwell in Victoria, it's Caitlin Hodder. This ain't no fodder. You're my favourite, Caitlin Hodder. Woo! From Maidstone in Great Britain, it's Fay Diamond. I'm down on one knee and I've got a Fay diamond. A fake diamond?
Starting point is 01:34:12 No, a Fay diamond. Oh. Which is one of the most expensive diamonds there is. One of the most valuable items on earth. And from Ramsgate, also including... Great Britain, it's Daniel Faulkner. Daniel Faulkner loves to talkna. Oh, and I love to listen.
Starting point is 01:34:27 Woo! Happy New Year, everyone. Thank you, Daniel Fay, Caitlin and Kay. That's fun, Daniel Fay, Caitlin Kay. Oh my gosh, that was so fun. That was really nice. Caitlin, the only Australian in there, everybody else, a Brit. And we love it and we welcome you.
Starting point is 01:34:43 So thank you so much. That's everything then for this week. Thank you for listening. Thank you again to Adelaide. what a fantastic audience. You were so wonderful and we had a great time. And hopefully it won't be like six years before we come back again. But I make no promises.
Starting point is 01:34:57 We know no promises. But you made a great impression. Yeah, they were like, oh, she's welcome back. Yeah. She can come. Oh, you're talking to me or to Adelaide? No, Adelaide. Oh, I see him.
Starting point is 01:35:08 I, Jess Perkins, had made a good impression. I finally won the MOVA. Finally. Because the thing is on the pod, rude dude. You know what I mean? Cool but rude. Sassy. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:35:21 In person, sweetie, patiti, yes. Okay? Yes. Couty, pituti, sweetie. Definitely. Why aren't you looking at me? Because if I do, you'll hurt me.
Starting point is 01:35:31 That's right. So, we've got to get out of here. If you'd like to suggest a topic, you can. There's a link in the show notes. And you can find us on socials. Do Go On Pod or do go on podcast on TikTok. That's right. We will see you next year.
Starting point is 01:35:46 What? There's a good chance you're listening to this next. year. Uh-huh. Isn't that so crazy? Oh my gosh. Dave, just that noise you made.
Starting point is 01:35:55 Can I just play them the sound that you made on an episode of, nah? No, you can play, yeah. Dave made this sound on an episode of Just Right's a rom-com and I... Check it out. I was on with Matt and we were talking about the movie Ghost or Ghosts.
Starting point is 01:36:09 What's it? No, it's ghost. Oh, yeah, we're talking about ghost. Again. Oh. It was too sexual. And I was not even. doing a bit.
Starting point is 01:36:26 No, while anything and I went, Jesus. I was literally trying to just engage in a conversation. Oh. So, yeah, enjoy that from the future. Woo! Thank you again. Did you mention our website and all that sort of stuff?
Starting point is 01:36:40 Yeah, if it's fine, they'll figure it out. Do you go onpod.com. We'll be there. And we'll be in... We'll be in New Zealand very soon. New Zealand, that's right, and Brisbane. New Zealand, in January, Brisbane in February. Head to dogoonpod.com.
Starting point is 01:36:53 Although they're all sold out. So I was going to say if you want to come, but you can't. Sold out. But we added extra shows. Have they not sold out? No, not quite. Well, at the time recording, not quite. Which is months early.
Starting point is 01:37:03 Yeah, okay. Try your luck. Try your luck. You never know. I hope to see you there. Love you. And we'll be back next year with some more do-go-on podcast goodness. Goodbye.
Starting point is 01:37:15 Good. But until then, thank you. Goodbye. And happy new year. Goodbye. Dave, try and say something. Come on. Don't forget to sign up to our tour mailing list so we know where in the world you are
Starting point is 01:39:28 and we can come and tell you when we're coming there. Wherever we go, we always hear six months later, oh, you should come to Manchester. We were just in Manchester. But this way you'll never miss out. And don't forget to sign up, go to our Instagram, click our link tree, very, very easy. It means we know to come to you and you'll also know that we're coming to you.
Starting point is 01:39:47 Yeah, we'll come to you, you come to us. Very good. And we give you a spam-free guarantee. Thank you.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.