Do Go On - 540 - The Ni'ihau Incident

Episode Date: February 25, 2026

After Japan's 1941 attack on Pearl Harbour, Japanese Pilot Shigenori Nishikaichi needed a place to conduct an emergency landing. He had been told that the nearby Hawaiian island of Ni'ihau was uninhabited, but that intel was wrong. People did live there, and what's more - the island known as "The Forbidden Isle" has a very interesting history...This is a comedy/history podcast, the report begins at approximately 07:20 (though as always, we go off on tangents throughout the report).For all our important links: https://linktr.ee/dogoonpod Check out our other podcasts:Book Cheat: https://play.acast.com/s/book-cheatPrime Mates: https://play.acast.com/s/prime-mates/Listen Now: https://play.acast.com/s/listen-now/Who Knew It with Matt Stewart: https://play.acast.com/s/who-knew-it-with-matt-stewart/Jess Writes A Rom-Com: https://shows.acast.com/jess-writes-a-rom-comOur awesome theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and logo by Peader ThomasDo Go On acknowledges the traditional owners of the land we record on, the Wurundjeri people, in the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders, past and present. REFERENCES AND FURTHER READING:https://www.businessinsider.com/inside-hawaii-rent-free-forbidden-island-strict-rules-niihau-robinson-2025-8https://www.historynet.com/niihau-incident/https://www.messynessychic.com/2021/08/25/hawaiis-forbidden-island-and-the-real-life-swiss-family-robinson-who-controls-it/https://prologue.blogs.archives.gov/2018/12/06/remembering-pearl-harbor-the-niihau-incident/https://www.loc.gov/classroom-materials/immigration/japanese/hawaii-life-in-a-plantation-society/https://www.nationalww2museum.org/war/articles/japanese-american-incarcerationhttps://www.britannica.com/place/Niihauhttps://prologue.blogs.archives.gov/wp-content/uploads/sites/9/2018/11/OF-10b-2054.pdf Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Melbourne and Canada, we got exciting news for you. And we should also say this is 2026. Jess, what year is it? 2026. Thank God you're here. Right now, I'm in Melbourne doing my show with Serengy Amarna 630 each night at the Cooper's Inn Hotel, having so much fun. We'd love to see you there. Canada, we are visiting you in September this year.

If you've somehow missed the news, we are heading up Vancouver, Calgary, Montreal and Toronto for shows. That's going to be so much fun. Tickets for all this stuff, I believe, are online. And I'm here too. And welcome to another episode of Do Go On. My name is Dave Warnocky and as always I'm here with Matt Stewart and Jess Perkins. Hello, how are you doing? Bloody good to see you.

Oh, thank you put it there, pal. Thank you very much. We're all shaking hands. We're doing a bit of a rigididg. Rigididge. Fist bump. Fist bump. Air bump. Air bump.

Good to air. Well, I mean, in this world, people don't know. Maybe we're sitting right on top of each other. They don't know who we're sitting at either end of a long, stately desk. Yeah, you guys are like my. my really wealthy but miserable in your marriage dads. Yes. And I'm stuck in the middle of the really long dining table.

Like, oh, I wish we could just get along. Dining table is what I meant. I don't know why I said desk. There's a dining table. You know, it's the same scene. Only the two dads are either side of a long desk. Both with a typewriter. Yeah, they're just doing their work.

Yeah. It's actually really nice. It's quite nice. They love to just, they do their own thing, but in the same space. Yeah, exactly. They can still see each other. They can still, every now and then, show a loving glance. Yes, check in.

Yeah. I'm going to go grab a cup of tea. Would you like one? Stuff like that. Yeah, I'm so close to being done with the Pitsky report. Uh-huh. Oh, that's great to hear. It's been really troubling you and stuff like that.

It really has. And I'm in the middle going, God, I wish I'd just get along. And we've probably got a butler. Yeah. Yeah. And I'd just say Jeeves will tuck you in. Right along, little girl. Forget your name.

They love each other. They don't love me. No. Because you keep trying to create drama. There's trouble. There's no trouble. We just like to work These Pitsky reports are on themselves

Oh my dad's Hey Jess, what is this show that we're doing right now Can you remind me in the audience? This show is like a family, a slightly dysfunctional one So you keep saying We all love each other It's fine, we're fine Well, one of the three of us, research is a topic

Usually suggested to us by our fabulous listeners They go away, they research it, they live in it, they basket, it and they bring it back to the other two. Tell us all about it with about a year nine, maybe year 10 level report. That's right. It's Dave's turn this week to... So you're Matt's usually trying to report on Pitsky.

We're like, you've heard it, mate. We've heard it. Stop right at the Pitsky report. It's Dave's turn this week and we always get onto the topic with a question. David, do you have a question? Yes, I do. And that question is on the 21st of August, 1959. What became the 50th state of the United States of America?

Missouri, Hawaii. Which one you like in? It is Hawaii. Nice. Which one was Missouri? Because that's the one that came in later. Is that the one that came in? I think it came in as a slave state at the same time as one of the northern states came in as a free state.

Here we go. I'm detecting a tone of Bill Bryson here. Is this, will that be correct? No, it was a question of trivia. I think I did like a few days ago. You see how much of that info I retain? It stays in. Yeah.

Some of it. At your age. They say doing those kind of puzzles and things is really good for you. Yeah. Yeah. I read that in a trivia thing. Something like that. Oh, okay.

I'm looking out a list of U.S. States in order of statehood. Hawaii 50, Alaska 49. Arizona, 48. We've got to keep going quite a bit back. What were you saying? Missouri. Of course. 24.

24. Who did it come in with? It's so fun if it's just a full nonsense fact. Yeah. It was a dream I was having. Yeah. Where I kept getting the answers right. But it turned out, yeah, there was all nonsense that I'd made up in my brain.

And you're still getting it wrong. No, no, I was nail it. Oh, okay, that's good. Well, yeah, 80%. Yeah. That's nailing it. Yeah. Yeah, it just says admitted 1821.

Maine was 1820 and Arkansas 1836. Okay, so it was a nonsense fact. You don't have to Google it to now in 20 minutes time, say, Nebraska is what I was thinking of. Oh, I can edit that out and then it will not be annoyed. Because I fear for the annoyed, the annoyed, the listeners who are the annoyed. I'll speak for them. They don't care.

There's a show that keeps getting advertised on, I think it's an SBS on demand called The Gone. I'm never watching a show called The Gone. It could be really good. That name. The Gone. I don't know what it is about it, but it just feels like they've run out of names. The gone, yeah.

Let me guess it's one of those ones where people wake up and, oh, a bunch of the people at you know what, are gone. And we refer to them as the gone. I guess so, I don't know. Where's mum? She's the gone. She's one of the gone. All right, well, you can take off over there because we are...

We'll see you in half now. Yeah, see you half an hour. The answer is Hawaii. Today we are talking about an event that happened in Hawaii before they became a state, known to history as the Nehi-Hihih How incident. Oh. This one's been suggested by Henry Will Hoyt or Wilhoi from Portland in Oregon, both directly

to the hat and on Patreon because we're doing a new thing where people on the Sydney Scheinberg deluxe Memorial Rest in Peace package get to directly suggest topics. And then we get all of Patreon to vote for them. So it's a way to make your topic stand out. And Henry really did that with a great pitch and it narrowly won the vote because there were some really good pictures from other Patreon. everyone people but Henry's topic on the Nehihau incident one Matt's put his hand up I'm just I'm just relieved to see that it is a real thing the Missouri compromised of 1820 Missouri was admitted

to the union as a slave state while Maine which was part of Massachusetts Massachusetts was admitted as a free state to maintain the balance of power in the Senate gotcha I rest my case your honor There you go. And the Pisckey file is complete. Can we go play catch now, Dad? Jess, I think of the three of us, you've been to Hawaii. Yeah. Matt, no Hawaii?

No Hawaii. No, but I've watched a Brady Bunch goes to Hawaii. Was it the Brady Bunch movie two? Probably, yeah. That feels vaguely. Sorry, I'm just going to have to go. Do they call it the Brady Bunch Movie Two? Probably not.

That's such a good title. You had a lovely time in Hawaii, didn't you? beautiful time, a beautiful place. You did a bit of vomiting in the water? I did. That helped me see sea turtles. Oh, they ate the chum. They love the chum.

That's so gross. But then the next day, I just went swimming at the beach and swam a bit further out and saw turtles. I was like, well, I paid quite a lot to go snorkely yesterday and I threw up everywhere. I imagine that seeing your own ones on your own, little swim would have been more satisfied. Yeah, it was very cool. And less vomiting. Yeah. You would have been like, I am from the same country as Steve Ewan.

Look at me go. Look at me go. The animals, they respect. me. Yeah. I'm one with them. They know I have safe. And then you see a Stingray rear up. And I go, oh no. Oh no. I'm not one of those. Now, our story today takes place in Hawaii and archipelago of eight major volcanic islands, the seventh largest of which is Nihihau. Now, I had to trust our man Julian who pronounces words on YouTube. And I've often wondered how he does so many words. He's got hundreds of thousands. So I have discovered his secret because this is his pronunciation for

this word. Sorry. Here it is. He's pronounced as locally. Niihau, ni'i how. Sorry, ni'i,

ni'i how. So you have to break up the e sound right? Is it? You mean he doesn't do second takes? He does not do second takes. And then Jesse, you want to put the headphones back on there because I've got a little bit more

from this video. Because there's obviously a thing where him and other people that pronounce words on YouTube, but they'll have to try and get to a minute or something for maybe. an ad purpose or something. So there's always a bit of preamble.

Oh, yeah. This is a bit more of him. And I've got to say, you lose faith a little bit with this. Here in the middle. Ni'i how. Ni'i how is how it's pronounced. So here we go. Coming back for the bit more.

The name of this, Hawaiian. Hawaiian. Oh, yeah. The number one comment is, who are you to teach the pronunciation of that island's name when you can't even pronounce Hawaii correctly? So I did lose a bit of faith. Yeah.

But then when you were trying to zing him there, you mispronounce, pronounce. So that's pretty good, too. Who are you to zing? Well, I've actually got that word from how he pronounces pronounce. So, but I sort of cross-checked it. This is how a lot of people are saying it. Nihihau is the seventh largest Hawaiian island. It would be hard to say that wrong like you just did.

I know. That was actually impressive. Well done. I had to type out. Ha, way. Yeah, you've got to do that for now. It is. Damon's younger brother.

Hawaii. So it's smaller than a lot of the other islands, obviously is number seven, but it is still 69.9.5 square miles or 180 square kilometers big, which for scale is about the size of Canberra, the capital of Australia. If you're not from Australia and struggling to know how big it is, that's approximately 9,000 MCGs. Okay, that's big. Because each of them hold 100,000.

You could fit 9,000 MCGs in Camber. Yeah, pretty good. Or if you're not into sport, that's about 180,000 Olympic-sized swimming pools. Okay. Wow. That's quite big. That's really big. And for American people, it's about three times the size of Manhattan.

Okay. So it's big. It's quite big. You don't have to tell American people. This is in the 50th state of America. Yeah, that's right. This is like... Top 50.

I imagine just off mainland USA. And they're good at geography. It makes geographical sense. Yeah, they know. Now, all the islands have nicknames. Hawaii is the big eye. Island, Maui is the valley isle, Molokai is the friendly isle, and Nihihau is the forbidden Isle.

Do you think that you could associate those sort of nicknames for the three of us? Okay. Which, who's which? The big island, the friendly island, the forbidden aisle. Yeah. Well, I think, I think we all know. It's a fun game sort of like Fuck Marry Kill. Yeah, but unfortunately I'm both big and forbidden.

So you guys have to kind of fight over friendly. There's also the Valley Isle. One of them is also the pineapple aisle. I quite like a pinnaker-a-law. Oh my God, yeah, delicious. Yeah, no, it didn't work as well as it was hoping. Scrap that bit. Just because, like, I have to be forbidden, right?

Yeah. But then, like, one of you would have, okay, I guess Dave could be big, but it's like an ironic name. Oh, yeah? Yeah, okay, that works. I'm the tall. I'd be the heaviest of the three of us. We're going to have a way off. Let's have a way off.

Oh, we should live stream it. Damon's other brother Way off That doesn't work I don't think he got the joke the first time Is it Damon way in? Yeah Way in, way off

Yeah But your brother's First name change is not their surname Yeah I mean it's so dumb That's what I'm going to I didn't need to I didn't think I had to explain it

But I had to prove that I did understand the joke Dave I still don't know if you did Way and way off It turns out that joke was way off I thought it was fantastic Thank you very much And Matt would ask AJ to edit it

But I stand by my work I stand by my work Nah AJ Look after him please You'll be good AJ be kind He's start jumping out of look after us That's so brutal

Dave will So that should we start doing that for him Because we'll I tend to just let him go hoping AJ will, but now we'll let him know, AJ. Yeah, AJ let her. That was a crook. Well, Matt just said it was fucked. And factually inaccurate. So like the other islands, it was part of the Hawaiian kingdom first established in 1795,

when the incredibly named Kamea Mea the first, who was then the Ali i. Ali i. which meaning ruler or king of Hawaii, he conquered the islands of Wahoo, Maui, Molokai and unified them under one government. Then in 1810, the Hawaiian Islands were fully unified when the final two islands, including Nihihau, voluntarily joined the Hawaiian Kingdom.

So they're all unified for a while. Then in a move I did not see coming in 1864, Scottish homemaker, farmer and plantation owner, Elizabeth Sinclair, bought the island of Nihihau from King Kamehamehaya the 5th, for US $10,000 worth of gold back then, which is roughly, I've seen it two figures, either $1.75 million now or somewhere else right about $600,000. So not that much for a giant island.

A farmer from Scotland. Yeah. Just what? She apparently, she first tried to settle in Canada and America and then decided to have... I'll buy an island. An island. It's wild to me that anyone can do that. Yes.

Yeah, I think there's like Bezos and like the Google guys. I think they own small Hawaiian islands. Yeah, it doesn't the finance year Jeffrey Epstein own one? I don't know that's in Hawaii. Yeah. But, you know, I mean... Of people who own islands. Yeah.

Oh, okay. Richard Branson, I think a friend of the financier, I think it might own an island. Really? Yeah. She also reportedly threw an island. grand piano that she had sailed around the world to seal the deal. Okay. Was the fact that the piano had travelled, was that part of its attraction?

Yeah. Yeah, that's right. There's scenes of stuff. Yeah, this one. It's cultured. It speaks multiple languages. It is waterlogged. It's honestly, the timber is warped quite badly.

You cannot play. Yeah, it sounds fucking terrible. It's awful. Blink, blon, blon. Blink blunk. But it has seen the world. I mean, you know, and that's beautiful in its way. Yeah.

No, there's no other piano that sounds like it. Nobody's got a piano like that. No. No. You go to somebody else's house, they've got a piano that sounds like this. But nobody's got one that sounds like this. Blanc, bling. Blink.

So I'll chuck that in for free. So what do we do? Are we done here? King was like, all right. I'm just going to go get it off my nature strip Just where I was story it for a bit Yeah not hard rubbish coming up Hard rubbish they don't even know when it is

Being doing hard rubbish they pull up And there's a piano there they go Oh fuck off Yeah I'm not picking that My parents recently got rid of the piano And I don't remember how Was it hard rubbish?

No, surely not How did they get the piano? It would have been given to them by someone else I imagine Yeah, pianos are really hard to sell secondhand. My grandparents bought it when my mum was a kid. So the kids could all learn piano and then mum inherited it when I was little. They seemed like they were more common like a couple of generations back.

And you just, they're around somewhere because people are like, you want this? Yeah, I think people are like, yeah, I can have a piano. That's crazy. And then they have it and it's like the trampoline, the trampoline episode of the Simpsomero. It's a curse. Yeah. Like, oh, this is just a huge thing that I don't know how to play. Yep.

Takes up a lot of space, but photos look good sitting on top of it. It's just a photo stand. Yeah. Because it's also, they're also really loud. Right. You can't discreetly practice, like with a keyboard or something with headphones. Yeah, yeah. You can't plug into a 100-year-old piano?

We can try. But it sounds like, bling, plon. That is funny. My parents inherited one in their late. a life, like, you know, 10 years ago or something from neighbours down the road we're trying to get rid of one. And then I think they had it. We're like, oh, yeah.

What were we thinking? What a rush of blood to the head that was. And it's still there? They got it. No, I've got it now. You've got a piano? Yeah. You idiot.

I know. Why do you think I know so intimately what's going on? Anyway, point is, either of you interested in a piano? I don't know. I've never been, I've never, I can't play a piano. Yeah. I thought I was going to inherit that piano. I also love the idea of having one.

Great. Do not have anywhere to put it. I have the smallest house on earth, no way. Smallest house on earth, he reckons. Yeah. Haven't you seen it? No, I don't fit. He's going to leave.

I've seen the outside. It looks very cute, but I can't get in there. And the thing is you think, you come out, David, I'll go have a look, but it's big enough for him alone. It's not big enough for the big island. It's not. I'm not changing my name in the group chat. To the big island. No, you won't because I already have.

Thank you for a bit of an aisle. But honestly, the piano is not tuned. It sounds like I was impersonating it then. And that's mainly because I don't know how to play it. And I've tried one time. And it's so funny to be betrayed like that by your parents. Yeah, they knew what they were doing. They knew because they just happened to them.

Your dad was driving away laughing like a maniac. I can't even remember how it came over. Maybe it was when I started a Ute. Otherwise, how? Yeah. Because there's a lot of time to think about it. You're like, oh, this is a pain in the ass. Hang on a second.

Yeah. You had a Ute? But it just felt like I'm like, how can I? Early days of pod. How can I? Don't you reckon it feels like the kind of thing you're like, I can have a piano? Yeah, absolutely.

Oh, yeah. Absolutely. This is crazy. Yeah. Anyway, this lady said, can I have an island? I feel like... Yes, please. I would think, AJ, a chunk of that piano check

could probably be trimmed down. I honestly want to keep talking about pianos. I've got more to say, but you're right. We should move on. All right. So, this lady, this Scottish lady, Elizabeth Sinclair, bought the island.

Are you thinking, well, it's probably an empty island? No, a community of about 1,000 native Hawaiians were living... So, Hawaiians. We're living on Niki Howe when Elizabeth Sinclair bought it. The sale included an agreement that the residents could remain, and they continued to live there, maintaining a traditional lifestyle, while the island became privately owned. But reportedly, within a few years,

more than two-thirds of the population had moved away. Because what's the point of her owning the island then? I think she can also do what she wants on the island. Yeah. But she just can't really move these people on. But then they voluntarily moved away for these reasons because the incredibly named Guthrie Skrimgawa... What?

...wrote for Business Insider in 2025. That's a purse. A guy who wrote... A modern person. In 2020... Last year he wrote an article about this island because it got a very interesting history. Give it again. First name, Guthrie.

Guthrie Skrimgower. No. I couldn't believe it. I couldn't come up with anything that good on this, like, name generator. Guthrie Scrimgown. You can't be named that in 2025. What are you talking about? Right of a business insider.

Guthrie. Yeah, no, that man has multiple pianos at his house. Oh my God, yes. And they're in tune. He's dueling pianos himself. Yeah. Guthrie. Guthrie.

Guthrie, so good. Guthrie Scrimgower. Scrimgower! I think I'm going to quote from Guth quite a bit. So he wrote in 2025, most Nikki Howens of the 1860s who had hoped to purchase the island for themselves, didn't appreciate the new arrangement,

and fled east to neighbouring islands. So a lot of people left. 160 years later, Elizabeth Sinclair's descendants, the Robinson family, continue to live on the island. So they still own this island. Oh, wow.

Today. Today. Today. I was expecting that to not be true. That's wild. Wow. A Scottish family owns an island... The seventh largest island.

In the 50th state of America. Yeah. Probably own it. That makes sense to me. I have no follow-up questions. I don't, yeah, I don't think that would create any sort of legal vagaries. Yeah. Any inconsistence.

Vageries. Vagery. I liked it. Wikipedia.org, which is like a history of Hawaii sort of website I found, has a family tree and it says... It's probably like wiki-e-pat. Oh, I see.

Thank you. I'll have to ask Julian about that. I really thought everyone was going to join him. Me too. I thought it deserved that. Yeah. I thought we were all going to build up so big. I thought I was going to get carried out of here.

I'm done for the day. That's how it was going to end. So it has the family tree, and this is how it passed down over the generation. So first it was Elizabeth. Then in 1915, Sinclair's grandson, Aubrey Robinson, closed the island to most visitors. Right, okay. Made it very, very private.

Even relatives of the inhabitants could visit only by special permission. She had to get Aubrey's permission to go see your relatives. Upon Aubrey's death in 1939, the island passed to his son, Elmer. And in 1968, to Elma's youngest brother, Lester, this is a great name. I was not allowed to have a normal, not normal, sorry. You can say. Poor use of word there. These are weird billionaires.

You're allowed to criticize them. Yeah, exactly. They own a private island. Yeah, they're fine. Every name is a little eccentric. Yeah. It was Aubrey, then it's Elmer, then it's Lester. Upon Lester's wife, Helen's death, the island passed to his sons, Bruce and Keith Robinson.

Now we're talking. The Aussies are moving. Yeah, yeah. Hey, yeah. Hey, got some great surf here. Hey, I'll tell you what. Where's the local pisser? Does I need to have a piss?

So are you asking where the local pisser is on the island you own? And then I'm going to drink piss, different kinds of piss. Yeah, I'm going to drink piss, I'm going to do piss, and I'll drink some more piss. I'll drink more, piss, more beer. And I really hope you know, I know there's some vagaries in language, but I hope you know that I'm talking about two different kinds of piss. The one I drink is the one of the beery kind. And the one I'm pissing is more of the classic.

pit. I don't know it depends how much beer you're drinking. Oh, broke the seal. Keith broke

the seal again. Am I Keith or Bruce? You can be wherever you want to be. Yeah, I am. I'm living my best life. Thanks,

but I appreciate that vindication. Bruce out. Okay, he's Bruce. So, Bruce. Bruce and Keith. And Keith. Bruce.

Bruce and Keith. Bruce. They are still the current co-owners. Wow. They're in their 80s now. They had two of the great names. So good. Are they coming back?

I think they're due to be back. We've got to bring Keith back for sure. My go-to-comedy. Baby Bruce. That's pretty fun. Bruce is so nice. Keith, there's a town called Keith. Near the Victorian-South Australian border.

Stop to get a photo by that sign. I'll tell you that much. You'd be criminal not to. Town called Keith. There's got to be a town called Bruce. You've got to be sister city of Gary, Indiana. I'm going to look up if there's a town called Bruce. Yeah.

That's ringing a bell. Is that just because it should? It should. Bruce. Bruce McAvaney. Special. There's Bruce in South Australia. A tiny almost abandoned ghost town.

Almost abandoned. Located 278 kilometres north of Adelaide. And then there's a Bruce rock in Western Australia. Imagine if the ghost town's ghost was named Bruce. It's like Bruce. Bruce. He's saying his own name for some reason. So I googled Bruce Town Australia

And it came up with In North Fremantle There's a cafe called Bruce Town Cafe Okay Brousetown, Bruce There's also the suburb of Bruce in Canberra Oh, that's what I'm thinking of Yeah

Whereas Not too far from here There's the train station, Dennis Dennis That's my favourite train station It tells everything you need to know About the differences Between Camber and Melbourne

Yeah They've got Bruce Canberra's got Bruce We're going on there for Dennis. Dennis. Dennis. Hello, I'm Dennis. Hello, I'm Dennis.

Oh, I'm the train on Todd. Oh, would you like to catch? Would you like to catch me? I'm Dennis. Shut the fuck up, Dennis. Your little dweeb. I want to fucking give that guy a wedgy. Yeah, I'm going to go up a camp with the boys.

Yeah, we're going to go with Bruce. Up and camera with the boys. You know who's not invited? Dennis. Dennis. Dave isn't participating because he's a real Dennis. Yeah. I love Dennis.

Energy. Yeah. I am. Dan Ann. I'll die for Dennis. The station. Yes. So it's still owned by the Keith and Bruce Robinson family.

Britannica is more favourable rights that the family quote have attempted to preserve Hawaiian culture there. Residency on Nihihau is restricted to Hawaiians and tourism is prohibited, although English is taught Hawaiian is the preferred language. And I read somewhere that's like it's the only place in the world where Hawaiian is, language is the designated first language of the whole place. Right. That's interesting. Yeah, well, that's something. But at the same time, the ethics of owning an island, do we?

It's great to be like, yeah, no, we preserve the culture and we try and keep tourists out and give the island back. You know what I mean? You know, in a way, it's similar to owning anything. Whoa. You know what I mean? Whoa. Well, as someone who owns very little, I feel like...

You're full ethical. Yeah, I'm very ethical. Pure ethics. And that's the reason you're not. Now I own a piano that I would love to... Pass on. You'd love to give back. To your mum and dad.

And then they could pass it on. To the neighbours who probably pass it on to their neighbours. Yeah. Where did this come from? It's a travelling piano. The Robinsons have been credited with helping keep the Hawaiian language alive, and people believe that many other traditional customs might have been lost of the island had been opened up to development.

These days, just 84 people live on the island. Wow. According to Guthrie Scrimgower again, or Scrimgower, the island has no Wi-Fi, running water or electricity outside of solar panels, which are a relatively new import. Locals wash their clothes in streams and light their homes with kerosene lamps. There are no cars or paved roads and just one truck. Most travel is done by horse or bicycle. Wow. There are several dozen native residents on Hihau are considered invited guests of the Robinsons and are allowed to live their rent-free as they have a generation.

But in exchange, there's always a catch. They must follow a strict set of rules that align with the owner's Calvinist beliefs. Okay, what does that mean? Vice is like, it's just like a... Who's Calvin named after? Pretty conservative type of Christianity. Calvin Cooleggia? Christianity? Yes.

Calvin or Hobbes? Calvinite fridge. Should we make out? Yes. It's happening. Calvinism or reform theology is a major 16th century Protestant tradition based on John Calvin's teaching. Ah, John. John.

I mean, you could have guessed that. So, vice is like drinking and drug use are punishable by permanent exile, as are long hair and beards on men. What the heck? This is a Christianity thing? Famously Christ did both of those things. All of them. He made wine. What are they doing?

Live more like Jesus. Grow your hair long. Have a beard. Drink wine. Or even turn water into wine if you really want to get into it. Yeah. Tattoos. Jesus had some full sleeves. Yeah.

Band. Have you not seen a crucifix tattoo? I'm sure he would add one of them. You know, he's like, I'm not scared of death. Look. Yeah. When he came back, he had one. Well, not tattoos, but he did have, you know, like these sort of permanent markings.

Yeah. Owning firearms is also banned, possibly because of today's story foreshadowing. Okay. Visitors, even family members of those living there, are allowed only at the Robinson's permission. So, and people have been, yeah, exiled from their communities. And the people that live there, like have been born there. Yes. Generations have lived there.

But they are invited guests of the family. Yeah, and a lot of them would probably have ancestry that. goes back way before their great-great-great-grandmother bought the island. Absolutely. But they are invited guests and follow these strict rules. And this is still part of Hawaii? Or is this? You're still part of Hawaii.

Yeah. And they're all American citizens and they all vote. Yeah, okay. And they're allowed to have these different rules, like laws outside of the... It feels like some of these are unconstitutional, perhaps. We have to follow the... There's a thing we have to follow the island owners. rules.

Or is it because of the private property, different rules apply? Yeah, I guess I don't think you could do anything that would make them. Though I guess, you know, they do have the right to bear arms, certainly. I don't know. I thought there'd be a thing where you can't, like, obviously is write your own laws.

Yes. But I guess you would just say... Private property, you're Americans, have the right to bear arms, but not, probably not in a hospital or something. Isn't that similar? Yeah, not everywhere. I guess if you came to my house, I could say,

I don't like what you're doing. I don't like you drinking that alcohol. Please leave my property. They're treating it like that, but it's just an island the size of three Manhattan. Yeah. One former resident that Guthrie Screamgo. That's why I can't get back into Dave's house.

I keep turning up with a six-pack. Yeah, and a beard. Get that beard out of here. Her husband. You're like, he has a name. I don't know what it is. Could you find out, please? One former resident that Guthrie Skrimgawa interviewed for the business insider piece is Polani Kahulah.

I've had a real crack there. Julian doesn't extend to pronouncing individual people's names. He's a Nehue Howan who says he's not allowed to return due to restrictions imposed by the Robinsons. He said he was banned from returning to his home due to his long hair. Scrimgawa writes, the hair band particularly bothers Polani because it doesn't align with the way he's Kanaka or native Hawaiian ancestors would have done things. Polani said in the interview, quote, we never had scissors.

Right. So traditionally, we had very long hair. On the issue of hair, Keith Robinson, one of the island's modern owners, who's in his 80s, said to Scrim Girl,

when giving him a rare interview, which he had to get by sending post to him. He apparently tried calling and emailing dozens of times, never got anything. Someone said, now the key is send him a letter. Right. And then he called him back that day. He said, when asked about the hair,

he said, quote, we're not going to turn the place into a hippie colony. Okay. So that's why he doesn't want long hair. That's funny because it's a very culty colony that doesn't sound miles from a hippie sort of thing. Now in his 80s, like I said, he has some pretty out there views. He recently published a book called Approach to Armageddon, detailing these beliefs and interpreting Bible prophecies to foretell a coming doomsday, writing, quote, the United States and Great Britain have made disastrous national

mistakes, which may ultimately lead to the rise of the Antichrist. Whoa, what does that mean? Someone who's, like, really against Christ, I guess. Yeah. Someone like, Ricky Javais. Rick Javis. Yes. He keeps coming back.

He does, and he, wait, is that true? I don't know if I've heard him mention. Does he not believe in Jesus? I don't think, yeah, I don't think he does. He keeps his opinions to himself. Yeah. I just get the vibe. It makes sense.

The Antichrist will be someone who has short hair. Yes. Because the real Christ has long hair. Based on the photos I saw as a child. Uh-huh. He won't have a beard. No. Oh my God.

Is it Ricky Juvres? No, he drinks booze. Does he? Like Jesus did, so. Oh, okay. Yeah. Hang on. Bruce and Keith fit these descriptions.

Short hair. Short hair. Don't drink booze. Oh, my. Oh, God. Well, he just... The calls coming from inside the island. And then when he comes, he's like, well, I want you.

You can say that any time anybody calls you here. Yeah, calls coming from because we live on a big island. Australia's an island. Yeah. Isn't that interesting? It is. It's confusing as well because it, like, you'll see it like the biggest island in the world. You used to always say Australia now it doesn't.

What happened there? I don't know. Too big to be an island? Too big. People don't like it if we say we're a continent either. Sorry, incontinent. Yeah. He's like, shut up, shut up.

They're like, keep that to yourself. Yeah. I don't need to know. Okay, I'm trying to raise awareness. Yeah. Okay. If this saves one person's an embarrassment. I lost my sphincter in an accident.

Okay? Okay. I won't go into it. No, unless you want me to. Please do go on. Some outsiders began coming to the island via helicopter tours that allow hunters to shoot wild invasive sheep for a hefty feet. Invasive sheep? What the heck is that?

You can come in via helicopter to go hunting. Yeah. You know, shit, it's a hefty fee. These are like crook, weirdo billionaires doing this. Yeah, it's like $3,000 or something to go for the day. Who could afford that? That would, I imagine there would be people who'd be like, yeah, I'd love to just pick off some docile animals. Hunting big buck is tricky.

Yeah. They're like, you know. They follow each other. That's keeps of them. Yeah. It's like shooting. you know, sheep on an island. It's a coin a phrase.

According to another great source here, messy nessiecheek.net. Okay. In 1987, the Robesons began reluctantly offering half-day helicopter tours of the island back then for $440 a pop has gone up. Coincidentally, in the same helicopter that was featured in the original Jurassic Park.

Great, yep. Which was loaned to the film crew in 1993. Initially, the helicopter was purchased by the family for medical emergencies, but the tours were introduce as a means to help pay for it. So they've got a helicopter there now. So they're struggling for cash a little? Well, no, not anymore because of what I'm about to say.

When you're hunting on the island, you're kept away from the inhabitants, I just want to say. So they try and keep you fully separate from the people living there. They also get money from the US government, again from Guthrie Scrimgoer. Since the 1980s, the US Navy has operated on Nihihau and has steadily replaced ranching as the island's primary economic economic engine, paying the Robinson's about $25 million in contracts since the turn of the century. So that's how they... And they also have a deal with the government where they pay very little tax.

Wow. God. Land tax, I read. Feeling a lot of sympathy for them. So how did the sheep get there? They were farming sheep at some point and now there's just a feral population. Yeah, I guess it got out of hand. Because the sheep, like, have been bred over a long period of time to...

grow big wool, big wool, which they need Sean. You never see that sheep years back? Oh, that ran away and got found, you know, it was. It looked like that kid who won't cut his hair until Manchester United win five games in a row. It was like a sheep version of that guy. It was just a puffball. Yeah. Looked awesome, but it would have been awful to be inside of it.

Yes. Was he like on the run for like a decade or something this shit? Is that what we're assuming these sheep are? Or have they started to de-evolve or pre-evolve? Or they can handle shears. Oh, now there's scissors. Their asses on the island now. I forgot so.

And most of this story is set in a time when Manchester United were good. Oh, okay. So every time they won five games in a row, shear the sheep. These days, it's out of control. They've got to pull their shit together. Yeah. All right, shoot. There's also an amazing nature.

on the island and apparently it was it was barren of trees for centuries just because of the way the weather is there but decades of planting and conservation has meant there are now lots of trees and many Hawaiian native animals call it home so apparently it's beautiful there's a beautiful place cool uh the inhabitants are very isolated from the outside world a world war two barge delivers supplies but the nihihawans generally forage for food and grow their own crops while meat from Nihihau's livestock is free and any meat that safari guests do not take with them is given to the village. So if you take out a bunch of sheep, you can't take it all with you, I guess. Just hanging from a helicopter as you fly back.

When laying out the deal with residents in a 1997 letter to the Honolulu star, this is so he wrote, Keith Robinson and the owner of the island wrote out the rules in a letter to a newspaper. He said, Residents are not permitted to, quote, do or say anything that adversely affects the Robinson's constitutional rights to enjoy the security and privacy of our property and business affairs. So most of the inhabitants that live there and want to stay living there do not talk freely to the press. Guthrie Skramgawa writes, Living on Nihihau means that you are functionally under an informal non-disclosure agreement,

which is pretty weird. So weird. So that's the island today, but what I want to tell you about is something that happened in December 1941 when an unwelcome stranger came to the island. Ooh, sheep. Okay, so we have to briefly talk about one of the most significant events of the 20th century, and that is the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor. What?

I'm kidding, I've been to Pearl Harbor. Twice. Why did you go twice? Because we went to Hawaii when I was a kid as well. Oh, right. My God. Yeah. On the way back from Disneyland.

Oh, my goodness. Yeah, a couple of family members died. We had some inheritance. Now, we did the right thing. Where is Pearl Harbor in terms of, is it the big island, forbidden island? It's on Wahoo. Wahoo, which is the fun island. Sounds like it.

Wahoo. And the one we're talking about today, is that the forbidden one? We're talking about Nihihau is the forbidden island. That makes sense. So Pearl Harbor, what was it like going there? As a big memorial, I imagine. Yeah, sort of museum type setup, and then you get on a little bar. type thing and you go over to another kind of barge type thing that's permanent there and you're

over the top of the Arizona, which is one of the ships that's safe. All right. Can you see it? Wow. Amazing. So of course, I'm going to be super brief because this should be its own topic one day. It's super intricate. But just to get everyone up to speed on December the 7th, 1941, a day which will live in infamy,

which is always at the start of the quote from hardcore history. That's how I remember it. The Empire of Japan launched a surprise military strike. on the United States' specific fleet at its naval base at Pearl Harbor on Wahoo, Hawaii. At the time, the US was a neutral country in World War II, and this brought them into the war. The base was attacked by 353 fighters, level and dive bombers, and torpedo bombers in two waves, launched from six aircraft carriers. And one of those Japanese pilots was 22-year-old airmen first-class Shiginori Nishikaichi. And that's who we're going to talk about today.

Shiganoi Nisikaichi. Nisichikachi was flying a Mitsubishi A6 M2-Zero Fighter, which is this badass-looking plane with red circles on the wings and the fuselage. Did it still have the three diamond logo that the... That the air conditions do today. The sedans and air conditions are stuff. I wonder how old that logo is. Did it come with a diamond guarantee?

Which I think is what they... Is that what they advertise of their products? If not, don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. I'm trying to think of Mitsubishi's tagline. I can't think of it. According to HistoryNet, which has a great article on this by William Halstead, Nishikaichi and seven other fighter pilots from the carrier,

Hiru, had attacked targets in southeastern Wahoo. After the raids, the Zeros reassembled and began the return flight to the carriers. The plan was to rendezvous with returning bombers just north of Wahoo's northern tip. The bombers would then lead the fighters, which had few navigational aids, back to the carriers, waiting nearly 200 miles away. After the raids, as Nishikachi and his fellow airmen began to make their way back to the aircraft carriers, a squadron of American P-36 Hawks became airborne and challenged the Japanese Zeros. There's a bit of a dog fight going on in the air here.

Now, Horset continues, the lightly armed P-36A's looked fierce as the Americans, but they were already obsolete. The Zeros, the Mitsubishi, out climbed, out-turned, and out ran the slower, less maneuverable. planes, the American pilots went down one after the other, victims of the Japanese Zero's superior maneuverability. Great ad for Mitsubishi's. You know, the Lancer. Oh, of course. Mitsubishi Magna.

Yep. The Pajero? The Pajero. Oh, yeah, my goodness. Yeah, what a tight turning circle. You know, and with towing power to boot. Yeah. Yeah.

It just out maneuvers. It does. Why can't I think of more Mitsubishi? I can't think of any. Are they still? Are they sort of a thing? Yeah. Mitsubishi, what are some Mitsubishi's?

What do they got? I mean, how can we not? What's their little car? Like I keep going to say Swift. Yeah, Suzuki Swift. That's what I keep thinking as well. What are we got here. The Magna's gone.

They don't make Magnas anymore. They make Magnas like they used to. Do they make Lancas anymore? I don't know. I don't know if they do. Let me go. Hatchbacks on the website. All right, what are you go?

We're on the Mitsubishi website. Dotting. Dot AU? This is dot AU, so this is what we got here. We've got, um, oh, what the fuck? The Kia Soul. Oh. Oh, this is sorry, I'm on the Essendon North Dealers website because that was the first

that they came up. First of all the internet, mate. Triton, Missibisi Tristan. Oh, the Triton. Yeah. The outlander. Outlander, of course. What about hatchbacks?

There's so many... Maybe they just don't make them anymore. Maybe Kay is definitely grown since the heyday of Mitsubishi. What are you got? The Mitsubishi. How did we forget this? Mirage. Oh, the mirage.

Yes, that's the hatchback that's coming up. The Mitsubishi Mirage. Oh, that's a bit of... That's why we forget it. Yeah. Is it even there? I thought I saw it. I'm so thirsty. They should have a Mitsubishi Oasis.

Oh, yeah. That'd be nice. Should I look up if they've got one in Essendant north? Let's get a company car. Drive away, no more to pay. It's like, oh, yeah. Yeah, no shit. What do you mean?

Why would they be paying more? You can only be saying that because it rhymes because it would be weird to buy any product and then for them to let you know later. Whoa, whoa, whoa. You got to keep paying us for this. You spend 50 grand and then you get in the car that. go, hey, what about the other third round? Yeah.

What, but I just paid you for this. Hey, it costs more to get in it. So, there's more to pay. Drive away, more to pay. Yeah. If we don't say on the ad drive away, no more to pay, we didn't say that. That means there's more to pay. Drive away, no, more to pay.

That's what we mean. Yeah. Drive away question mark. You really thought you get the car for $30? Yeah, come on. This is clearly a deposit, okay? And honestly, a really small deposit. We should have asked for more.

It was a risk you didn't come back today. And I'm not going to leave another message. Please come back. Please. By the way, it's Gavin from Essendon. Sorry, yes, it's Dennis here. We would really appreciate it if you could pay the rest for this car because my boss is really handing me, Keith.

And he actually is, you know, he's a real man. He owns an island. So, with the American enemies taking care of Nisichikai. he flew on. He knew he had been hit in the firefight, but at first he thought the damage was only superficial, but his fuel seemed to be dropping rapidly because, in fact, he had been hit a dozen times in his plane's petrol tank. Okay.

Not a great place to be hit. No. His engine began to give out and his comrades flew away, leaving him alone in the skies. I was there with the Russians. Can't keep up with them. He remembered his morning briefing, which stated that pilots who are in trouble, were to attempt to land on the Hawaiian island of Nihihau, where they should wait for a rescue by a submarine. Right.

The Japanese thought the island was uninhabited, which of course was wrong. He calculated he was 130 miles west of the island and dropped altitude to aid the spluttering engine in the hopes of making it. He soon saw another Japanese zero that was also clearly struggling after being hit, and the plane followed him as they limped towards what they hoped was the safety of this uninhabited island. After half an hour of his engine spluttering, the island came into view. Whoa, that's a long time to be spluttering. Half an hour? Yeah. Come on.

Come on. Go on, please. Nearly empty on the gauge. A little bit more. A little bit more. A little bit more. A bit of the gauge. You're on the Hume Highway.

You're like, I've not judged this well. Come on, Shell. You think half an hour is a long time, do you? Okay. I think it is if you're... Says a lot about what matters. The word, Matt's spluttering. What?

Whoa, whoa, whoa. What? Did I splutter? I don't know why that was so funny. I'm not like a chance of laughing. That's so stupid. It is stupid, but it's funny. Did I splutter?

All right, see you later, thoughts. Not telling you again, did I splutter? Hey, what? Did I splutter? I'll see you next week. And people are like, who was that? Half an hour of entering spluttering. You only came to view, as did it.

the structures and clear signs of life on the island. Oops, the intelligence was wrong. People do live here. Oh dear. Nishikachi realized he had two options. Try and crash land onto the island, which was enemy territory, or crash into the sea. Also, to be honest, enemy territory. An enemy territory.

Yeah! That was so, if you didn't splutter, that would have been perfect. Did I splutter? Did I splutter? So, he's like. Two options. Crash land here, crash land there into the ocean. Yeah.

I don't want to be picking. But the other plane was still with him. Remember there's another plane that's also struggling and was trying to land here as well. He signalled after going around that he was going to land. HistoryNet picks up the story again. The pilot of the other stricken zero, Amman's second class, Subaru Ishi, waved away that suggestion. He had just radioed his carrier, the Shokaku,

that he had intended to return to Wahoo and crash dive into some, worthwhile target. Basically do a bit of kamikaze. He's like, I'm going down, I'm going to try and take someone with me. A few minutes later, Nishikachi watched Ishi, the other guy, climbed steeply, then inexplicably dive straight into the sea. So he didn't quite make it too. He might have seen a submarine.

He might have. Enemy submarine. An enemy submarine. They have the technology. Maybe saw Harold Holt down there. I don't know if the timelines, why not. So now it was just Nishikachi, who attempted to. a landing on a piece of pasture next to an isolated house.

He prepared for a hard landing but didn't intend to clip a fence. His nose crashed into the ground, nose of the plane, and he was slammed into his instrument panel, nose of his face probably. Amazingly, he was alive. Wow. Watching this whole crash landing was Hawaiian Howard Kaleo Hano, born and educated on the big island of Hawaii. He had been permitted by island manager and then owner El Moro

Robinson to visit his sister on Nihihau in 1930. He'd gotten married and stayed on and was now one of the few inhabitants fluent in English. Because he'd come from the outside. Imagine like everyone else's so waiting for her. They were just popping over to see your sister. He's just visiting. Oh yeah, I got married. I found a laugh here.

You were just going to go for a couple of nights. You've got a laugh from the family of here. You already married. So Kalea, Heineo saw the plane crash and ran over to help, according to the National Archives. Although he was unaware of what it just unfolded in Pearl Harbor, Kaleihano recognized the markings on the plane as Japanese and was familiar with the strained relations between Japan and the United States.

So there had been a bit of beef leading up to it. They weren't officially at war, but they had been a bit of back and forth between the two countries. Yeah, because at this point, America was still like, you know, people are saying bad things about Hitler, but we're going to see how it happens. Let's see what goes on here. We're not getting involved in this. You want us to pick a side between literal Nazis and the other team who are calling themselves the good guys? To be fair, Nazis were also calling themselves the good guys.

True. That's confusing. Which is confusing. Yeah. No way are the good guys. Yeah, I think the Nazis should have been clearer. Yeah. If you're going to be evil, just say we're the evil team.

Just own up to it. Yeah. Be like, we're the baddies. Okay? Okay. And we're proud of it. You don't lean in. That's right.

It's not just ladies that need to. Ladies, lean in. Ladies, of course, lean in. Evil people too. Evil ladies, all the evil ladies. Put your hands up. I felt a fellow I lost a thread at some point. You lost the thread, me.

Didn't lose us. Okay. Westie-Hour for you, man. Did that splutter? So, Gleihano, he saw the day's Japanese pilot trying to get out of the plane, gun in hand, and he quickly grabbed the pistol. He searched the plane and collected the papers on board, which included multiple maps of Hawaii.

But remember, he doesn't. know about Pearl Harbor yet. Right. The pilot appeared friendly, so Kalei Hano took the man into his house where his wife served the visit of breakfast. Oh no, he's about to get married as well. This place, you just fall in love. Oh, once you there, you can never leave.

Yeah. Why would you want to? Unless you want to grow your hair. Damn, I'm going to choose between love and my love of locks. And see, like, you change your hair all the time. Yeah. But I feel like as soon as you got to a. place, even if you liked it, if they're like, you can't grow your hair.

You'd be like, I just want to have longer. I felt like a rat in a cage. But like, you know. I do get very restless with hair, hair and beard. Yeah, fair enough. I'm like, Dave, Dave's locked it in. I mean, you did perfect it. He's nailed. Exactly.

He's perfected it. I never have. You're trying to find. Exactly. And you will one day and then you'll keep it. Because Dave, he used to be searching. Yeah. And he looked in the wrong places for a little bit.

That's right. You've looked in a lot of good places. But I think it about 10 years ago, was it? Oh, yeah. Seven years ago, Dave found it. And my God. Once you've got it, you don't give it up. I imagine now you just go to the hairdress and they've got a mould.

Like, let's put it on. I go on and ask for the Dave. And they say, well, yeah, obviously. I hear a bunch of other men asking for the Dave too. And I was like, that's one of mine. Like, yeah, sure, you're the dove. No, I'm on the Dave. No, I am on the day.

I'm the first man in history to get a short back in size, a little off the top. But it's sort of like to the quiff is slightly to the side. It's almost, I don't know. With the Sheffield, you've added the Sheffield. That's right. I've added the Sheffield. So there's still more Sheffield to come, I fear. So it will change.

How Sheffield can you go? Can you go full Sheffield? I can go full Sheffield. Did Sheffield, what about an inverted Maxwell? You know, with a shock of black. Oh, I get black tips. Yeah, get black tips. Once you go full silver.

Full silver. and then bring the black tips in. Yeah. Just one shock. That's fantastic. Yeah. I'm using the term shock problem. Your hair wasn't black to begin with.

And I did have black when I was about 14 and I looked odd. Yeah. It looks so pale. Yeah. But it was vampire chic. Too high contrast. Which is funny because they famously say once you go black, you never go back. But Dave did almost instantly.

Yeah. Dave's the exception. Yeah. It's true. So they've given him breakfast. They've given him breakfast. But he discovered the pilot did not speaking. the Koliihano does not speak Japanese, they didn't have a real way to communicate.

So Kaleihano then summoned 61-year-old Japanese-born beekeeper Ishimatsu Shintani, who briefly spoke with the pilot. He spoke with the pilot, then became visibly shocked and walked away without divulging to Kaleihano what he'd just been told. Turns out, Nishikachi had told him that Japan had attacked Pearl Harbor and declared war on the USA. Oh, I would have kept that on my hat. Yeah, I probably would have kept that to myself. And Ishimatsu Shintani, he'd lived in Hawaii for 41 years. His children were US citizens, but he was not, and he was wary of getting involved.

So he was like, I'm out. He just left. But he didn't tell anyone about Pearl Harbor. He just went, I don't want any thing to do with this. Left the island or just left the conversation? Just left the conversation. Just like, walked out of the house. And Clayhahn is like, what was that about?

They probably like, he must have shied himself. Like, he just left really quickly. His facial expression changed. I think mid-sentence, he might have. He might have shouted stuff. He sharded. He shodd. So Kaleihana reached out to the only other Japanese speakers on the island, the Haradas.

A couple who spoke English and Japanese, who would be the perfect translators. And I did not realize this, but people of Japanese descent are the second largest ethnic group in Hawaii, many having come over at the turn of the 20th century to work on sugar cane plantations. At their height in 1920, they constituted 43% percent. of Hawaii's population. Right. Wow, 43. Yeah, because I was thinking this island's got 80 people on it.

What are the chances of three of them speak Japanese? Yeah, I was surprised by that, yeah, especially with how, like, restrictive they are, with who's allowed to be there. But, like, it's just a lot of Hawaiian people are of Japanese descent. So back to anyhow, 38-year-old Yoshio Harada had been born to Japanese parents in Hawaii. He had three brothers in Japan, and his wife, Irene, was also the daughter of Japanese parents. So they were summoned they spoke to Nisikachi, who again told them of Pearl Harbor, and demanded that his pistol and papers be returned to him. The Heradas were wary that

others on the island viewed them more as Japanese than Hawaiian, even though they'd lived there for a long time. So they also decided to keep this information to themselves. Yeah. I don't want to be paired with that. Yeah. We didn't do that. Yeah, it's interesting. I mean, I don't know what I'd be doing but if it does come out you're going to look like you were working together. Yeah, collaborating. So rather than coming out. Yeah, it's a very tight spot to be in. Like, ugh, I kind of wish I did not hear that.

Yes. Yeah. No, no, no, no. Don't say that out loud. With the rest of the island, not knowing they were technically at war with Japan, they treated the Japanese pilot to a luau. Where, according to the National Archives, Nishikachi even sang a Japanese song while playing on a borrowed guitar.

So everyone's getting along pretty darn well He's having a great time Yeah He's just told them all What's happened What he was a part of Yeah he's like Not ashamed at all

Yeah And he's like And he's not fearful for his own He's like yeah So you guys part of the US We just attacked you Yeah so if you can just go get my gun And I'm just gonna wait here

To be picked up Yeah And in the meantime I'd love to party Yeah In the meantime They're getting a bit of Traditional Hawaiian Hospitality

Everyone's been really friendly And nice Yeah So yeah Does he think he's like, they obviously don't give a shit? Or is he aware that they're not telling the others what's going on?

I think he, yeah, I think he would presume that they're not telling anything. Right. And it's just going along with the good vibes for a bit? I don't know that much about it, but Japan at the time was pretty like cultish in itself, right? As a nation,

they were fully believing in their superiority in the world and stuff, right? And that's why they were going for a bit of domination. In the story, he's like Nishikachi has, No doubt the Japan is going to win the war. Yeah. No doubt. He's thinking, like, he's, he's feeling that confidence. I mean, his mate just went, my plan's going out, so I'm going to sacrifice myself for the cause.

Like, it's a big sort of. Yeah, culturally, there's a lot of sacrifice for the cause. Absolutely, yeah. And you expected to do that. However, the truth came crashing in when that night news reached the islanders by radio, and the true nature of the pilot's appearance on anyhow became clear. So they were like, okay, what do we do? Yeah. Now it feels like they're like, this is when they might be like, yes, now we just didn't really know how to tell you.

I've written you, the Japanese couple, the Haradas, told everyone else what Nishikachi had revealed to them, and I'm guessing everyone was pretty happy that they'd taken the man's gun away, just for safety. So the residents of Nihau discussed what to do with their unfortunate visitor, and this came at a time when their landlord, the owner of the island, Elmer Robinson, was away. It turns out he only made a weekly visit to check on his. island. Oh, that's weird. Weird. So they live there all the time, but they're a bit like, I guess we'll wait for the boss to come back, kind of.

That's the vibe. Where's he living? Somewhere else in Hawaii. Right. But with naval restrictions in place following the Pearl Harbor attack, he couldn't make it over. They weren't letting boats travel. On the island, they didn't know this and was surprised that Robinson didn't

arrive as scheduled on December 8th the day after the Pearl Harbor attacks and Nishikachi had arrived. I think they were a bit like, don't worry, the island, owner will come back tomorrow. We'll ask him what we should do and then we'll go with that. But then he just didn't turn up. And he's not radioing. So they just don't know what's happened.

I don't think they have a radio. Oh, didn't that how they found? Oh, they were listening to a broadcast. They can listen to broadcast. But they don't have a radio to communicate back and forth with other islands. Yeah.

They're very isolated. That's why the family loves lettuce. Exactly. Lettuce? Yes. It's a delightful accompaniment to any sandwich. Rabbit food? Who else is craving Hawaiian pizza right now?

Oh man, give me some pineapple. Should we? I'm down. Should we stop? There's a pause now. Get a pizza. I'm getting really hungry just thinking about a wine pizza. Which I believe is not a thing in Hawaii.

No. I don't think so. But what a tribute. Similar to the bloom and onion. Yeah, that's right. We don't have that. According to HistoryNet, the island's former resident superintendent, John Rennie had died in September, and Robinson had appointed Harada, the Japanese man acting as translator,

as paymaster in Rennie's place. That had made Harada a man of stature on Nihihua. He's got these responsibilities and he was now torn between his American citizenship and his Japanese heritage. The Haradas asked to keep Nishikachi in their home on the condition that five other Nihihihawans would stand guard and shifts. So they sort of put this guy under a vague arrest until they could work out what to do with him, but he could live in a house with the people that speak his language. Yeah, that makes sense. He'd look after, be look after Chloe. There's worse places to be a prisoner of war.

Yeah, very true, very true. Pilot Nishikachi spoke to Yoshio Harada, obviously in Japanese, so the others couldn't understand. The pilot had apparently sensed that Harada's loyalties were torn and began to play on that. He assured Harada, this is what I was saying before, that Japan was certain to win the war and slowly won over his countrymen, including Harada's wife Irene. He's a bit like, you should help me, Japan are going to win the war, and it will be good for us. Help me now.

Whoa. Nishikachi had been told that under no circumstance was the enemy to get his papers, which included military intelligence and details of the attack on Pearl Harbor, and he was intent on getting them back, no matter the cost. Whoa. There was the easy way, and there was the hard way. Oh, I'd go the easy way. Well, I did try that first. Yeah, at least try. Start with the easy way.

Can you give me the paper? Because it'd be silly to try the hard way that doesn't go well. Then the easy way works. Yeah, like, oh. Oh, the doors unlocked the whole time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shouldn't have been climbing over the, trying to go down the chimney. Front door is open.

The front door's open. God, I'm a fool. I'll tell you what. That's Santa every 24th of December. Yeah. Just quietly. Mate. We left the door unlocked.

Just knock on the door. Yeah. You're a beloved. figure. We'd love to see you. Everyone would love to see you. Yeah, but I think then like... Oh, it's small talk. Yeah. He doesn't. Yeah. He's an introvert. He wants to dash. Dyn and dash. Grab a carrot. It's not about time. It's an introvert. He's like, I don't want to... It would take forever, wouldn't it? Yeah. Yes. And... I'd chew his fucking ear off. It'd be the same questions every time. Like, how do you do it?

Yeah. I can't tell you, obviously. Big night. Yeah. Yeah. How long have you been working for? Bet you a bit sick of milk. I bet you're looking forward to having the rest of the year off. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, sure. Yeah, we have to make the toys as well.

Yeah, it doesn't take an entire year to make the toys. Ignorant, Pipsy. This is what I mean. Like, it just wears him down. Yeah. He'd rather go down the chimney. So if you bust him, he just quickly just runs with the chimney starts climbing. I don't want to talk.

So then the 61-year-old Japanese beerkeeper Shintani, who initially didn't want to get involved returned, and he spoke with Nishikachi at Harada's house. and obviously he was like all right i'll help you out so on friday december 12th 1941 shintani the beekeeper went to the house of kaleihano and attempted to obtain from him the papers kalei hano had taken from the pilot out of his plane shintani stated that it was quote life and death matter and indicated he decided decided just to destroy the papers by burning kalei hano showed the papers to him but refused to give them over even though shintani offered a large money bribe of two hundred dollars

Huh. Yeah, which would have meant nothing to him, I'm guessing. He's like, I'm a prisoner. Oh, no, so this is... Oh, the other way around. Yeah. Gotcha. This is the local Hawaii.

I'm like, why are they bribing this Japanese man with American money? Then I've got to go to a currency exchange. I don't know what that is. No, he offered the money to Kalahe-Hana, who's the guy that first found the pilot and took his gun and papers before offering him a delightful breakfast. So this is the hard way is bribery? Or is this still the easy way? Yeah. Going up and be like, can I have them back?

It's really important. And when he says no, all right, I guess it's going to have to be the hard way. Can I have my gun back? Because I'm about to threaten you with it to get those papers. It's a lot easier to threaten you with a gun. So a few days went past and Harada decided to fully help the pilot. This is the Harada whose house he's staying at. It's such a weird position.

Harada's in part gone, they see me as a Japanese man anyway. You know, if I stay loyal to the island of, on who's to say they're not going to turn on me later so i'm going to turn on then first you yeah yeah and if you're all like like having someone a bit of propaganda in the air being like well your country's going to lose and then it's all going to be you're all going to speak in japanese here anyway you know may as well be on the winning side early i already speak japanese yeah all right i'm talking figure it like this is a bigger thing man god everything's so black and Why with you?

I'm trying to be theatrical. Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. And scene. So he's like, all right, I'll help you. He stole a shotgun and a pistol from the unoccupied ranch owned by the Robinsons, the people who own the island.

Being the paymaster, he had a key to the ranch. He then hid the weapons in a warehouse nearby that used to store honey. He's like, I'll come back for you later. He's talking to the honey. Yeah. I need a little sweet pick me up. He'll get me up. He'll come back for you later. Then he got home and he told the pilot Nishikachi about the weapons had stolen.

At this point there was only one guard on duty. Remember they'd ask for five. The pilot asked to use the restroom, which was an outhouse. Now, the only phrase, this would have come in handy for me here because the only phrase I remember from my seven years of Japanese in primary school is, can I go to the toilet? Okay. Because the teacher wouldn't let you go unless you asked in Japanese.

Classic. And it's something like... A lot of pissy seats in that class. I'd just be pissing myself left for on center. Toori ni eti-moye, deska. Ah. And I once asked the Japanese speaking person, and they said, that's kind of close. Yeah.

That's good enough for me. I don't know why you're pissing left or on center though, Dave. It's like an out-of-control fire. Yeah, that's the teacher being like, you can't go on. I'm being like, well, fuck you. I'm pissing the left, right, center. That class was covered in my piss. Okay.

And then they said, all right, next time just go. Just go. Just go. Just learn the phrase. Just learn the phrase. I've got it written on the board here. So Harada and the guard followed Nishikachi to the outhouse. And when he ended finished up, Harada said, this is the local guy, that he had to do something at the warehouse. And the guard wasn't suss at all and happily went with Harada

and they took the prisoner Nishikachi. Then when they got there, Harada produced the hidden weapons and locked the guard inside the warehouse. Wow. With the honey, I imagine. So that's pretty good. So he's all right. He's got all the honey.

Hmm. Suckers. The guard's wife soon arrived, I imagine, looking for him, and she arrived on a horse-drawn wagon, and Harada and Nishikachi, now acting as a team, horse-jacked the woman, and ordered her to drive them to the house. Yes, that is a phrase that I invented. And ordered to drive them to the house. That's all like, you could flip it around and you're really changing it up. Jack the horse woman.

Yeah, very different Yeah, very different Makes you think, doesn't it? Words Woman the jack horse. You could woman the jack horse. Woman the horse jack. That's true.

You know? Words, you gotta put them in the right order. They're powerful. Words, they're powerful words. Gotta put them in the right order Otherwise the meaning will change. Words. So they jacked off this horse one.

And then they ordered her to drive them to the house of Kalahe-Hano. The man who had first come across Nishikachi when you crash landed. He'd been the one who'd been the one who'd taken the papers on the pilot's pistol, and they presumed he still had them. So they went straight to his house. Kalahe-Hano was not at home, so the two men detoured to the nearby, broken-down plane. They tried the radio, but it didn't work.

So then they went back to Kalahe-Hano, where he had been hiding in the outhouse. on the shitter. He'd been hiding on the shitter. That's why when they knocked and they'd come out, come out. He didn't come out because he'd already run to the toilet to hide. Tort. He was in the toilet. And whilst he's in there, I imagine he used to. Yeah, well, wouldn't he? I think it's kind of like, it's Pavlovian. You get near a toilet and you're like, it's Puvlovian. And you're like, I do need to go. I need to go. Yeah. Especially if you're sitting on it.

What about, because I mean, you know that feeling when you really need to go to the toilet and you're rushing to get into your house or whatever. And as you get close to the toilet, you're like, it's coming. That's Pavlovian. That's probably. And you just, you realize you can start to relax a little bit. Yeah, but not too much. Well, you can.

I lost my sphincter in an accident. Can never relax. And we will not talk about it. We won't talk about. Don't need to go into it. But you know that, David. I'd ask you to be a bit more sensitive. Yeah, please.

Sorry. So it's your sphincter privilege. Yeah. Your perfect schfincter. Oh, my God. You could just donate the inner ring. I don't know if that's possible, but I'll, What's happened?

I was talking about a sphincter transplant. He also just did a song about words. I know. Like, we're all, I think we're all hungry. I'm so hot. But it's like, this is the first thing we've done today. Like, this I'd expected the afternoon. Yes.

So who knew it? We record load. It's going to be unhinged. It's going to be a few words in that, I reckon. Oh, we're going to get sleepy. And it'd be really low energy. But by then, we would have had a pizza by then. We would have had a pizza by then.

Pizza and a coffee. Oh, fuck. Now I could go pizza for lunch. Yeah, I really could. Is that place around the corner that sometimes works with the studio open for lunch? I don't know, but yeah, maybe we could cash in some free pizzas. Oh, my God. Please.

Well, without telling Evan. Evan, we've used you free pizzas. Evan, I know you get a pizza every month or something. Well, not this month. Not for the next three months. We got one. So, they've gone to Kalahano's house, he's not there, they've gone to the plane, they've come back, he's run out of the toilet. So Harada fired his shotgun at him, missing the man.

And who remember is one of his neighbours. They live on the island together. And he's now shooting weapons at him. Oh my God. So Harada, he's a local, Japanese descent. And he's turned to the crash landed Japanese man. Yeah. And he's just shot at the guy who was guarding him.

him? He shot at the guy who they think has the papers and the pistol. Right. The first guy who found him. So he's shooting at him for just to scare him off

to make... This is the hard way now. To stop him running away, yeah. See, he's got him on his person. And it's tricky because... They don't know. He could be on his person, could be in his house.

He could have stashed him somewhere. Oh, they are American. Shoot now find out later. Am I right? That's cops. Anyway, I added that out, though. Do you mean? Um, well, it's just so interesting because Harada has sort of changed.

He's so quickly gone with what the Japanese, um, like, pilot has said. Yeah. But it's one person. It's one person telling you Japan's going to win this war. Yeah. I'd be wanting to like back that up a little bit. Yeah. You know?

Okay. But they obviously don't have easy contact with other islands or the outside world. There's a bit of a, like they're sort of having a bit of a, he's having a bit of a freak out. Yeah. on the island, being like, I think this is what I should do. And now, like, it's escalating exponentially fast because now he's shooting at one of his neighbors. Yes. Wild.

He's picked the side now for sure. Decades. Yeah. Probably not into the long time. It's wild how quickly it can happen, you know? I'd shoot you in a heartbeat. Yeah. If someone told you that, what?

Oh, that doesn't have a good. Yeah. No, just if I had a gun. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. This is why it's important that. you don't have one. Correct.

Yeah, and you know that. I know that. This is something that people don't say about you. You don't have self-control with a gun, but I think it's really nice. You could get a gun. Probably. You'd be, like, it would take a little bit of time,

but you could get one. Yeah, they're more heavily regulated here and that you have to register and... Yeah. But you could go on and you choose not to. I choose not to. Because you'd know you'd kill me with it. That's right.

I would kill you with it. I'd just have to straight away. Yes. Sorry, thank you for not killing Matt. Thank you. Would you kill anyone else? But definitely me. Oh, absolutely.

And I know where you live. Yeah. Bet anyone else? Thinking, thinking, thinking. Like, say there's an intruder who's about to kill your dog. Is it you? Yeah, is it you? Or are you already dead?

I'm already dead. Okay. Intruder's trying to kill the dog. Look, I'm not going to shoot now. Ask questions later. So I'd probably try and reason with them a little bit first. See if there's something else I could offer them. Yeah.

Okay. But I would kill you immediately. Yeah. Okay, well, that's, yeah, no further questions. I don't think my psyche could handle it. A group of friends went to when I was in Thailand with a group of friends as like, we were 21 or something. Everyone went, we went to a like a gun range and they were shooting. all sorts of insane.

Have you ever... And I never, I didn't participate. Has there been a single year of your life you didn't go? Because I knew I'd get back on a plane. I would come and I would kill you. You seem you've travelled a lot. There's trips I don't even know about. I've traveled less than Dave.

Oh, yeah, well. Yeah. You know, money bags McGee over here. We're lucky. We're lucky. We're that more of it didn't travel so much. That's true. Man, I'd like to be traveling.

How good is it? We should do a tour. Okay. Let's look into that. To Japan. Oh my God. I'm so keen. If you're listening in Japan or Hawaii, we've got the mailing list.

Yes. We're going to go to places where people we know are going to be there. Of all of Asia, because there's a section of Asia, Japan, Tokyo is the number one. But I think it's only like 30 people or something to sign up. So if you are listening and you're like, I'm in Japan. If we could get like 100 people there, maybe we'll go. It's on. That'd be awesome.

All right, sorry. Let's get back to that. All right. So he's shot the shotgun at collect. He said. Thankfully, for Kalayana, he missed, he ran, he piss-bolded, and then he informed the rest of the village what the heck was going on. Because this is all very sudden that this guy that they were sort of semi-guarding,

but friendly with is now on a rampage with one of their other locals. They've both got guns. So most of the residents fled to remote areas of the island for their own safety. Kaleiano then snuck back to his own house, and Nishikachi was no longer there. He grabbed the documents that Nishikachi wanted. wandered so badly and then went to his mother-in-law's house, hid them there, before taking off on a horse, heading for the northern part of the island where he hoped to light a signal

fire to alert outsiders that trouble was brewing. Wow. This guy's cool. He sounds like a badass. He's a badass. He's like a real taking troll the situation. I'm picturing the rock playing this character. That would be sick.

I can be honest, yeah. And then the problem was he's badass, but he's a little bit clumsy, and he accidentally lit the papers on foot. fire and he hid the signal fire. And his mother in the house. Yeah. She's come home and gone, what are all these sticks? Yeah.

What is this? Oh, no. Damn it. So when he arrived at Mount Paniow, which is Nihau's highest point, he discovered that some other men had already started a signal fire. What are they signalling? I had that idea, too. Same idea that were like, shit's going down.

We've got to tell people outside. Not wanting to take the chance of the authorities immediately. seeing the fire and understanding the peril of the island was in, Kalayana grabbed five others and set off in a boat to get help. It was midnight and the journey would take ten hours. Oh, wow. So they jumped in. One way.

Okay. Well, but they'll be able to get back quicker on some sort of flying machine. Or a more powerful. Some sort of fantastimogorical flying machine. It takes ten hours to fly from here to Hawaii. Is that true? Yeah. Should we go there for pizza?

That probably makes the most sense. No, but it's the only few places that don't have Hawaiian pizza. Should we bring Hawaiian pizza to Hawaii? My God. We could make a really big amount of cash from tourists. They will thank us. Where's the Hawaiian? Oh, right here.

Come to Keith and Bruce's Hawaiian Pizzeria. We've also got Ozzy. We've put egg on it. We crack an egg. That's an Aussie thing. Weird for some room. We love it. It was the only thing people hadn't done.

So we went, all right, we'll do that. Don't mind an egg on a pizza. I don't mind it either. So they went in a boat for 10 hours. They made it and then they called the owner of the island Elma Robinson. It was obviously pretty shocked by the story. Yeah. He'd been trying to get to the island for days but was told he wasn't allowed to break the naval blockade.

But with this new information, he was able to convince the local commander to send a boat to Nihihau and sort out, you know, two gunmen on the loose. Back on the island, the pilot Nishikachi and his local accomplice, Harada, took the man they'd locked in the warehouse with all the honey and another local man hostage. What's happened to Harada's wife? You were saying she was sort of on board? Yes, but she's not with them. She's still at her own house. Clever.

She's hanging out. Yeah. I'll wait to see how this pants out. Everyone else has fled, and she's like, I'll just sit there. Yeah, I was supporting whoever won the whole time. So they went back to the plane. this is Nishikachi, Harada and their two hostages, and stripped off its machine gun and ammunition

before trying to burn the aircraft. Unfortunately, the cockpit didn't really catch light, which is embarrassing. Honestly, they're not very, they're not the best at this. Okay. They're not that competent. They then let one of their prisoners, Kaliki Kalima, go to tell Harada's wife, Irene,

that he wouldn't be home that night. Okay. So they're like... All right, but then you come right back here and you'd be back as a hostage. You come right about. and then you come right back. History Net writes,

then he and the pilot, apparently drunk with power, walked through the now silent village, firing their weapons and yelling for Kalei Yano to surrender. Well, they've lost their minds. Meanwhile, Kalima, who was a hostage and then a messenger, of course, didn't go back to his captors,

as probably instructed. Instead, Radden found his wife, as well as Ben Kanahelae, a local six-foot-plus Hawaiian sheep rancher known for his incredible strength. Okay, maybe this could be the rock. But now I'm thinking, this is Jason Mamoa.

This could be Jason MoMAWa. It's a big dude. It's a strong dude. It's Aquaman. We can do better than Aquaman. So bad. It's so bad. One of the octopause on the drums?

Is that that that movie? What was that finding name? I think that is Little Mermaid. Little Mermaid. Yeah, that's Little Mermaid. Yeah, yeah. But also pretty good. So good.

What a great song. Under the sea. That's not right, is it? No, it is, but if you start singing again, you'll have to sing the whole thing. And then the more... Everything's better. Down where it's wetter. The more time we take up, the less pizza.

Less pizza. We'll be eaten, absolutely. Ben Kenahelae and Kalima were able to sneak to the wagon. That's the big man and the other guy who'd escaped. Well, actually, you know, the messenger that didn't come back. They went to the wagon where the pilot had stashed his machine gun and ammunition, and they quietly stole it, going unnoticed in the daring raids. They were a bit like, we don't want you to have this.

Yeah, that's a good call. And fortunately, they were soon captured when they tried to return to the village to get some food, along with their wives. So now Nishikai and Harada had five hostages, and they returned to Kalayiano's house searching for the papers. They're desperate for these papers. They'd taken the weapons to keep them away from the... the army man, the pilot.

Is that right? And then they were captured? Do they still have the... No, they'd stashed the weapons away. Like, they're basically just delivered it to them. No. They're like, oh, sorry, we thought you wanted this. Yeah.

No, they don't have the machine gun anymore, which is fortunate. So they're like, we want the papers. They went to Kalayana's house. They're obsessed. They think he's got it. They, of course, couldn't find them, and they burnt down his house in frustration. Which, I guess you're like,

if the papers are in there, they're burnt. But if they're not, you will never. know they're not in there. So they then forced strongman Ben Cana Kanahele, possibly Jason Moa, to search for Kalei Hano. Kana He knew that Kalei Hano had already left the island in a boat, but he put on an academy award-worthy performance of pretending to call out and search for him. Like a parent playing hot and sick with a kid? Where are you?

I'm going to have a look under the bed. Oh, not there. Oh, under the pillows? No. Could be in the pantry. I see two feet poking out. Couldn't possibly be anything to do with me. My parents always, they kind of still tease me because playing high and sick with me, they'd go,

Jesse, where are you? And I'd run out and go, here I am. Jesse, you idiot. Just explain to the game. Do you want to come? Okay, no, that's on us because we keep saying, where are you? If people broke into your house and your parents are like, hide, hide, hide. The robber.

Yeah, the robber's like, anyone else, please come out. Where are you? I'm here! Hello! And then she just charms the shit out of them. Yeah, that's right. And then kick them in the shin.

So they're frustrated they couldn't find him. Nishikachi, who was armed with the shotgun and a pistol in his boot, threatened that if they didn't find Kolea, he would start executing people on the island. So stuff's really stepping up here. History Net writes, The placid Nihihowans were normally slow to anger, but by this time, they'd had enough.

Speaking Hawaiian, the strong rancher Ben Kenahela, demanded that Harada, a man he knows from the island, take the pilot's pistol. Harada refused, being a bit like, come on man, this is crazy. You've got to take this guy out before he starts killing our friends. Harada refused, but he indicated to Nishikachi that he needed the shotgun. A bit like, you have the pistol, I'll have the shotgun. as the pilot handed over the gun, the big man, Ben, Canaelae and his wife lunged at him.

No. Nishikachi was too quick for them and he grabbed the pistol from his boot and fired off three shots at Canaalee, hitting him in the chest, hip and groin. But this really is like a Jason Mara time. Now his pistol. Like something out of an action movie, this only enraged the big Hawaiian man who grabbed the pilot, hoisted him in the air and threw him against a nearby stone wall. Whoa. Just like, piffed this man.

Holy shit. And just a heads up for the listeners, there's a brutal bit coming up here that I will quote directly from history net, but if you don't want to hear the violent details here, you can skip ahead. So they've thrown the pilot into a wall. Grabbing a rock,

Kenaheli's wife began to bash the fallen pilot's head with rocks. Kenaheli then drew a knife and slit Nishikachi's throat. What? Which is so full on. Harada, you know, the local man, no doubt realizing that he had abetted a disastrous chain of events, jammed the shotgun muzzle into his own gut. I also read his mouth and he pulled the trigger.

So he ended his own life. Both men were dead. It all happened so fast. Oh, my God. Isn't that so wild? Wow. So for people who just skipped ahead 30 seconds, the two insurgents.

Yes. They are dead. They've taken that. One was taken out by. Wow. Ben and his wife, the other man ended his own life, realizing that, you know, oh my God, what's happened. But Ben's been shot three times.

Yeah, Ben's been shot three times. And not, I mean, there's no good place to be shot. Especially three times. No, but those are all pretty important places, and you're going to bleed out of them. Yeah, chest hip and groin. An army rescue party arrived. Fuck Mara Kill, chest hip groin.

Oh, fantastic question. Definitely. I'm going to fuck the groin. I think that's a good choice. Do you what I mean? That's classic. It makes much sense for that purpose. I'm going to...

I'm going to marry the chest. That's where the heart is. Oh, that's good. Yeah. And I'm going to, I guess, kill hip. Yeah, hips are replaced all the time. Absolutely. Hip replaces is the cliche almost.

Exactly. Yep. It's boring. You were two for one anyway. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. I think I'm happy with that choice.

That's the perfect choice. Yeah. Thank you. I mean, it's great. Oh, thank you so much. We all agree. Fabulous. Fuck the groin.

And the army rescue party arrived the next morning. It's a little late fellas. Yeah. Oh, thanks for joining us. Oh, thanks a lot. Did I splutter? Yeah. And I'm pleased to say that the hero of the piece,

Big Ben Kenahelae eventually recovered and was awarded two presidential citations. The Purple Heart, given to those wounded or killed while serving, even though it wasn't serving, and the Medal of Merit, which at the time was the highest civilian decoration of the United States in the gift of the president. Wow. So you got this presidential award. Who was the president? time. Of course.

They would have been so stoked if it was Calvin. Yeah. Is it Roosevelt? World War II President. USA. It was, uh, it was Roosevelt. Roosevelt. Unless they went until after the war, which they might have because there was so much

going on. There's a lot happening. So this whole kind of, this whole thing only lasted a few days. Like as in the pilot landing, this main event was like a night. Like it was quick, right? Wow. Very dramatic. In the movie, there's going to be a lot of just hanging out in the honey room. Yeah.

Apparently there is a movie of this that was suggested that I could check out by Henry, who suggested the topic saying they made a really bad movie about this. But he's saying you could watch it. You could, but it's pretty bad. I think it's so low budget. You might have a bit of fun watching it. I see. So, yeah, he got those awards.

Wow. The National Archives note that Ben was the only one remembered as a hero. In fact, Pilot Shiginori Nishikaichi's hometown of Hashihama in Japan has a monument dedicated to him, engraved on it are his actions over Wahoo. It said that he died in battle and has a stirring and poignant epitaph that says his meritorious deed will live forever. Wow. That's for the pilot. For the pilot in Japan, so he got a statue.

Yeah. That's always one man's terrorist, another man's freedom fighter. Yep. It's true. How war works, isn't it? Yeah. The Nihihau incident, as it has become widely known, was the subject of an FBI memorandum authored by none other than J. Edgar Hoover.

And you can find it online that'll link to in the show notes. In it, he describes the actions taken by both the antagonists and the brave inhabitants of Nihihau. HistoryNet finishes by writing that Harada's widowed wife, Iran. was punished. They write, quote, thought to be a Japanese spy. She was jailed on December 15th, 1941, and she was transferred to a military prison on Wahoo where she was reportedly questioned but held her silence.

She was released in late 1944 and returned to Nihihihau, embittered for life. So she went back to Nihanna. Which would be, like, it's obviously already a pretty small community where everyone knows each other. And people would remember that, you know, your husband had helped this guy that. And she was embittered, as in she would just sort of was like, harumping around.

Heronfing around, yeah, I guess, like, you know, her husband, you know, did die because of this chain of events. Yeah. No, but probably ran to pause. Oh, right. She's going through the change. Yeah, that'll have you harrumphing. Oh, yeah. That'll embitter you for life.

Shintani, the beekeeper that didn't want to get involved at the start, but sort of helped by asking for the papers to be returned, was taken into custody and interned on a U.S. mainland. on the US mainland throughout the war, which is kind of his big worry was because he wasn't a US citizen and his kids were, and he was like, I don't want to rock the boat here, even though I've lived here for four decades.

With the post-war repeal of racial barriers to immigration, he became a naturalized citizen finally in 1960. Oh, wow. But before that, many Japanese Americans faced a very tough time during World War II. The actions of Shintani and the Haradas, all Nihihihawans of Japanese ancestry, were noted in January's 1942 Navy report,

as indications of, quote, likelihood that Japanese residents previously believe loyalty to the United States may aid Japan. Because that had happened in this isolated place, they sort of extrapolated from that. And it was a big reason that this happened. The National World War II Museum writes, at the time of the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor, about 120,000 persons of Japanese ancestry lived on the U.S. mainland, mostly along the Pacific coast. About two-thirds were full citizens, born and raised in the U.S.

Following the Pearl Harbor attacks, however, a wave of anti-Japanese suspicion and fear led the Roosevelt administration to adopt a drastic policy towards these residents. It writes, both alien and citizen alike. Virtually all Japanese Americans were forced to leave their homes and property and live in camps for most of the war. And it was the same here in Australia where we had a much smaller Japanese population, but about 98% of Australia's Japanese population were sent to internment camps during the Second World War. Wow. Interesting to note that despite both Pearl Harbor and the Nihihau incident happening in Hawaii,

the territorial governor of Hawaii rejected calls for the mass incarceration of the Japanese Americans living there. And I'd like to end on the territorial governor of Hawaii because his name was Joseph Poindexter. Oh. The best name. Normally, I would agree with you. But we heard from Guthrie, whatever the fucking... Scrimgastry. Scrimgower.

And unfortunately, Joseph Poindexter takes a second place. Oh, you're true. I think I'm really pretty sure that Dave's just made up this story. And that's why he's quoting from a guy called Scrimm Shrepshire. Scrimm, Scram Shrashra and Poindexter. Yeah, let's, yeah. I couldn't believe. I should check what other work Guthrie's, Guthry Scrimgall has done.

Stick up for yourself, Poindexter. I hope Guthrie's got Instagram. He says, oh, he says freelance journalist. investigative journalist, it says, on his LinkedIn. It's got 300 plus followers on Twitter. Make that 300. You're re-signing up to Twitter. I'm getting back on there.

New York City-based. He's written for Rolling Stone, wide business insider. Insider? No. No. What? Is he a stud? He's quite innocent.

Oh, my God. Luke Perry. Guthrie, my man. He is a... He's quite Edson. He's hot. What the heck? What the fuck?

Not your value. Obviously your name is your value and that's incredible as well. But yeah, he's a stud. Guthrie, what? Schro. Just type in SCR and you'll come up. I was saying, I found him on Instagram. I was saying Scrimgauer.

But do you reckon Scrimgauer's right? Would you say that? Jess, it's G-E-O-U-R. I found him on Instagram. Are you following this guy? Yeah, I'm going to follow him. Thirst traps? This is.

This would be so bizarre I was expecting the oldest man in the world Me too I assumed who was as old as the guy He was interviewing on the island Like in his 80s The first thing that comes up is Guthrie Scrapyard

Okay That's good stuff too Guthrie Scrimgower Wow Okay sorry Dave I'm happy to end I was going to end on Joseph Pointex but let's end on

Guthrie Scrimgower What do you have Do you have any tales to tell What was it Pointex are going to say Oh no, I just wanted to say that that was his name because I thought that Matt would enjoy Stick up for yourself, Point Dexter.

That's fantastic. Yeah, but that's the Nihiaw incident, a story I'd never heard of, and I would like to thank again Henry for suggesting it both in the hat and on Patreon. And he did such a great pitch that other people in Patreon obviously thought it sounded like a really interesting story too.

But there's not heaps of it online, like all the sources that I quoted from and linked to are kind of it. So I'm not sure how Henry came across, it, but I'm thankfully that they did because it's certainly an interesting part of history I wouldn't come across otherwise. Yeah, it's a really fascinating story. Yeah, and how quickly things can escalate from like you're having, giving this guy a breakfast. That night he's playing a song on a guitar to like literally within 48 hours he's shooting it at, you know, your fellow people. Yeah,

it's wild. Wow. Absolutely wild. Wild stuff. Yeah. And I, And a, you know, a positive ending for that community. For the community. And obviously, that community still lives under interesting circumstances. Very interesting circumstances. What's the succession plan for Keith and Bruce? Oh, yeah, they got kids. I did read that in the Scrimgoo interview, actually.

One of the brothers, I can't remember which one does have kids. The other one doesn't. And they haven't announced the succession plan yet. But I think it's assumed that it will go to one of their children. Right. And the chamber will go on. The American government have tried various times to purchase the island, but they hold out, so they don't want to sell it. I'd sell it, I reckon.

To America? Well, yeah, no, good point. Well, I don't know. I mean, I don't know who. Well, yeah, I mean, I guess it's really up to what the people on the island want. You would think they would want to be. They might be happy with how it is. Yeah, totally.

It's hard to know. When I think of someone who owns an island, I think of like a billionaire and, like, you know, it's like Richard Branson's island that you're saying before. or like it's got a resort on there, that kind of thing. But this is very, I think they live very basically, even the owners of the island. Well, that's why they don't live there permanently because they go back to check their emails and stuff. Like, what I would do is I'd sell that island, you know,

hopefully the people to keep it as a sanctuary for the people that live there and the wildlife or whatever, but get enough money that you could buy your own private resorts. Yeah, with Wi-Fi. Yeah, and running water and stuff. Obviously, it'd be a bit smaller, but that's okay. That's all right. Yeah, I don't have to shit in a hole.

Yeah, live a life of luxury. Yeah. And still own an island. and still tell people, you know, in an island. Yes, I'm going to my island for the weekend. But I think that they think of, like, the outside, because of their religious beliefs, I think they think of the outside world as being a bit corrupted and evil,

and they're in this little enclave where they live by their beliefs, their Calvinist beliefs, and, um. Well, good on them. The last post, Guthrie hasn't been posting a lot later. Yeah, he hasn't been a very good. But about three years ago, his last post was, um, photos in Kauai. Yeah, most of those posts are in Hawaii.

Oh, really? But this... It's a bit of acting, like, looks like in sort of low-budget short films and web series. Oh, that's cool. Well, the article that I quoted a lot from, that I'll, of course, linked to, that was from August 27, 2025. So it's not that old. So he's been there pretty recently.

Okay. All right. And he was in Boston Children's Theatre's production of hair in 2013. So. Back when he was still child. Yeah. Okay. We hope.

So, you know. There you go. There you go. Well, Dave, that brings to everyone's favorite section of the show. Jess has just snuck out due to ongoing health issues. Doctor's mandate, she goes for a walk around the block. But she's going to get us coffee. It doesn't matter.

She might be back before the end of this. We'll see. We'll find out. We'll find out. Stay tuned, everyone. So this part of the show, we spend it thanking who I call the greatest people on earth. I agree. Yeah.

Our Patreon supporters, these people make the show exist. I mean, good. We started it existing and they're like the life support, keeping it going. Without them, we almost definitely would not still be doing it. So we really appreciate their support. everything. And so yeah, that's why we spend the last little bit of our episode. Dave and I, Jess, obviously, doesn't quite have the same level of appreciation for you.

No, I'm only joking, of course. That felt too real. She loves you. She loves you. Also loves a walk. We, yeah, we spend a bit of this time. Thank you those people. If you want to be one of those people, we go to Patreon.com slash dogo on pod.

It's probably linked in the show notes, I believe. But I think most of you know how to find things online. You know how to type? And yes, the first thing we like to do in this part of the show is something called the fact quote of question section, which actually even has a jingle. I think it goes something like this. Fact quote or question. Ding. Always remembers the ding.

I this time remembered this thing. And the way this works is I've got three today. Three of our great supporters on the Shidney Shanburg. Oh, we love that, Sydney-Shainberg. Sydney-Shaneberg, Sydney-Shanberg, level or above, get to give us a fact, quote, or question, or a bag or suggestion,

or really whatever they like. And these are the people that also are giving us direct topics now that we're... That's right. Getting other patrons to vote for. Yes. If you've got a topic you really want us to do, that's your chance. You have the direct line,

and then they go to the vote. Yeah, that's right. The patrons vote. It's a system, and that's what leads to the quality of topic like today. And they also get to give themselves a title First one up this week comes from

Shazza Shazza and Shazza's title is connoisseur of perfectly lining up glassware and even numbers only

five is okay in brackets Oh okay I love I love our Shazza is a connoisseur Chazza has a question which is

Hi friends Since last writing I've a small brag I got a job As a quality control chemist I love being in the lab and I can still listen to the pod while getting the work done.

Ideal scenario. That's great. We can't do that, you know, when we're on stage or in the studio. Well, we're doing the pod? We can't listen to other pods, as much as I love to. But we listen to the pod we're making right now. Oh, that's true. We're sort of in the pod.

Yeah. And the pod is in us. Yeah. But imagine if we're like, sorry, yeah, just listen to the latest philosophy. You can keep it down over there. Shazza goes on. The other day I was washing the glassware, I realize that I only have 900 mil volumetric flasks.

Apologies if I'm not saying that, right? I can instantly hear Jess saying one more or four less. My question is, there was an echo of just saying that. She's furious down the road. My question is, if you could be any piece of chemistry classware, which one would you be in white? I mean, luckily Shaz her answers, but the only one I can really think of is...

Is the end of the... I'm thinking of. Yeah. The Conical Flask. Oh, the Conical Flask is a great call. I was thinking of the, what do you call the little tubes with the round bottom and they have to sit in conical flask? Or is that what I, is that what that is what that is. No, no, no.

You're just thinking, I think that's called test tubes, isn't it? Test tubes. I was thinking test tube, but the conical flask is brilliant. What an elegant piece of glassware. And he can do a real swill down the bottom and it won't come out the top? Oh, that's, yes. Can I change my answer to a conical flask? Yeah, you could also have a beaker.

Oh, yes. That's, like, a beaker's useful for, like, the kitchen as well. Yeah, beakers, beakers are great, but they're not as cool looking as a conical flask. Yeah, I'm going to go conical flask, but I was thinking, what did you say I was thinking? Test tube. Test tube. Test tube, yeah, classic test tube. I mean, they're pretty fun as well.

It's fun to have a bit of glassware that can't stand up on its own. Yeah, you need the extra. Stand up for yourself, point actually. Stand that to a test tube. I want to know if we're a hack and Chazzo knows some ones that I wouldn't have even heard of. She did also ask why. I think it's just that conical flask just looks awesome.

For me, it's just the swilling capability. Yeah. It looks like someone I'd be happy to drink out of that. Yeah, for sure. Like if you go to someone's house, if they had that for drinking out, I'd be like, oh, a bit eccentric. Wasn't there a bar in Melbourne at some point, like 20 years ago, 15 years ago? Oh, there was. Down one of the laneways.

Yeah, it was all science-based glassware. Well, the whole place was a comedy festival venue as well. Yeah. People did, like, it had like a 30-seat. What was that place called? It was called the something lab or something? Yeah, I'm thinking of the exact same place you're thinking of it. Anyway, a little eccentric.

So, Shazarise, my answer is a 400-mill beaker. The beaker is such a versatile piece of equipment. It is. It's helpful daily, but also. not, but not, but not also very accurate. I don't fully know what that means. I guess it's also not very accurate. I can.

But it feels like it is very, anyway. But it's 400 mil, but it's 400 mil, but it's 400 mil, because often things will ask for 2501 cup or two is 500 mil. The beaker is such a versatile piece of equipment, comma, is helpful daily, but not also very accurate. This is the science linger that is not connecting. I think it's the most important thing to have in a lab but can also but use as a general cup.

I agree. So with conical glass, like we're saying, you could sup from that. Here's a link if you want to have a look at what there is. Thanks for always providing laughs. Oh my God. There's a link to westlap.com.com.

You slash consumables slash glassware. Wow. And this is where, Dave. Oh, we're in glassware heaven over there. Holy moly, look at this guy. Volumetric flasks. Borosilicate Class A with a PE stopper.

Yes, please. Yes, please. What they put that in for free? It's, I mean, what a range. I thought there would be ones that we'd never heard of. But yeah, I think that none of them be what you suggested, Dave. I've got to get the conical flask. Fantastic. Great question. I'm glad I'd answer for it.

I've never been announced that one before. Give me up. What's your favourite piece of chemistry glassware? And why? I've never, I've never, I've forgotten it again. What was the test tube? I never would have come up with that. Test tube.

It's too obvious that I can't. It's so obvious I was like, there's got to be a more scientific name that I've forgotten. No, test tube. That's the one I remember with your Bunsen beaker. Bunsen burner. Bunsen burner. You put the beaker of the Bunsen burner. Yeah.

The Bunsen burner and you, you know. It sits on that little mesh sort of platforms that it can get heated up. There's the safety flame. Which honestly looks more impressive. Yeah, that's the big yellow bit. Yeah, but then you have the smaller blue one. Safety flame. Yeah, because you could twiddle your fingers through it.

Yeah. Just like Heath Ledger did in 10 things I had about you. I forgot that you did that. I was going to say a night's time. I'm like, mate, that's my move. He's told my move. Hath was all of us in that movie. I like how I didn't even put on it.

It was just an Australian guy. What a guy. That's the dream. You get cast and I have to put on an accent. Went for an audition recently with an American accent. I'm like, is there any chance this character who will be Australian? Hey, guys. That's great.

He. He now. He now. He now. Whoa. Whoa. All right. Okay.

Hey, I'll read the next one in my attempted American accent here. General American. General American. That one was specifically a Southern state, but I went general Southern. This next one comes from Bob McBobbington, Bobby Bubbington, aka the president of Spending How's making something only to decide not to use it. and Bob is asking a question. Bob writes,

while I was sat on the sofa, on the sofa with a bad back, looking at a tube, I had wasted hours, machining, and ended up not using for an X-Mas present, I started thinking about old stuff and how old Matt is.

And a question came to mind, what is the oldest thing you own? I have a metal, work lathe that's a bit over a hundred years old, which originally would have been on a royal navy ship. It's a Drummond Admiralty, and I'm not sure if it would have been powered by a treetle or hooked up to some power from the ship's engine, but has since been converted to use an electric motor. It's not an amazing shape. It's not in an amazing shape, and it's a missing business. but it's okay for the age.

I also have a pillar drill from the 60s, which is really nice. Thanks so much for riding into us, Bob. Thank you so much, Bob. And what was he doing with a tube or a tube? He was watching it. Watching a tube. He was looking at a tube.

A tube. He was looking at a tube. He made this tube for a Christmas present. Okay, no more questions. Could it have been a test tube? Test two. What are the arts? Do you own any really old stuff?

Gosh, obviously you've been around for a long time. Yeah. You've moved house so often. I think my bass amp is older than me. Oh, really? I think it's like from the... Did you inherit it? No, I bought it second hand.

Oh, that's awesome. What was it called? Someone house of music. Troy's House of Music. In Bramwood? When I was in early high school, we would go to Troy's House of Music in Ringwood. I don't think it's there. Maybe it wasn't real.

I can't remember. I had to catch a train, you know, a couple trains and, um, Joyce House of Music. Yeah. Oh, that piano, I have no idea how old it is. And Dave, I really think it would be good in your home. You're a musician. The piano would be pretty old.

Yeah, it's got to be. And no, thank you. Oh, for me, old stuff. I've got a few things I've inherited from my grandparents. a couple of old like, you know, those Toby Jugs. Oh. Like characters. And they're basically like a mug, but they call them Toby Jugs.

I've got a long John Silver one. Oh, that's fun. I've never heard the term, but yeah. Probably from the 50s. I've got one of Pops, one of Dad's Dad's, like, he got this plate given to him after the Second World War for like, commemorating service. So that's...

You know, from the 40s. Oh, yeah, I've got, like, one of my grandma's old books where she, like, in high school had been given, like, an award or something. And it was like, and the prize was a book. And it's got her name in the front of it. So that would have been, like, the 30s or something. Yeah. I don't think of anything else. Yeah, I feel like, depending on where you live in the world, there'd be things that are so, so old.

Yeah, they're like, really? No, I said old. Yeah, my house is like 400 years old. Yeah. Hey, it's Boppa. Hello. So Jess is here and she's got a green drink for me, which is a pistachio, a coffee for Matt, and a blue drink for Jess, which is very exciting. And a cookie!

Full range of colours. We just said the question there. Firstly, you've only missed two fake quota questions. Great. First one is what's your favourite scientific glassware? Oh, a beaker. Fantastic. Well, you agree with the question.

and ask a shazzo. Who is a professional chemist? Oh, I love that. Dave convinced me of the, what was it? A lovely conical flask. Conical flask. Oh, a conical flask is fun. And now Bob McBobbington.

But Matt couldn't remember the word test tube. Test tube. I couldn't remember test tube just then either. I was like, what are the logs skis or boys? The rounded bottom. Test tube. Exactly what Matt. Yeah.

Matt and I have the same person. What's the oldest thing you have at your house? Oldest thing. He's got an old, uh, an old lathe. that's over 100 years old. That's cool.

I have a little pot, like a pot plant pot that my grandma gave me that was like her moms or grandmas or something. Oh, that's cool one. It's really old. Yeah, probably something from grandma. I was going to say jewelry from grandma, but I think that was bought in her lifetime. Ah, interesting. Yeah, a couple of things from grandma that I've inherited.

But they're like, unfortunately it's not land or... Well, that's the thing, isn't it? You go to land? I mean, billions of years? But it's just like a little teapot thing that's been in the family for many generations. I tell you what, I'm going to pick up a rock on my home and now I'm going to have a new answer next on Bob Arson.

Oh, that's good, yeah. I've got a rock, that's really good. I've got this rock. Who knows? Thousands, easily. Geologically speaking, is that the wrong? It's real old. Really old.

Real old. I've got a cut full of sand. Yeah, that's pretty old. It's a fucking old man. Oh, I mean, all of our older molecules will make us up. Yep. My bones. We're there at the Big Bang.

Is that wrong? I think Bill Bryson told me that. Oh, guys, I'm going to see Bill Bryson tomorrow and I at the time of recording. I don't care. I don't care. Are you excited, though? You can message Dave about it after. I'll message him during it.

I got cheap tickets. Probably won't be able to see him. Yep. Either of you have opera binoculars, you seem like the tops. That's one of the oldest things I own. Actually, do I have an old pair of binoculars from my granddad, but not opera ones. You would just look like a bit of a bird watcher that's got lost.

Yeah, I'm happy with that. Thank you so much to Bob for that question. Last one this week comes from Nell, aka second favorite child. Depends on where you're putting your emphasis there. Also. Second favorite child or the second child, who's also the favorite child. Second, yeah, that's my situation.

Yeah, me too. My thought was it depends on how many children there are Because if there's 30 Yeah, number two is actually fantastic But if there's two It was like three Not great, not great There was an Olympian asked

This week after winning a couple of silvers If it was happy to win silver Or does it feel like two chances Was it two golds lost or two silver's earned as he has it? And she just like schooled them for it It was so good She was like, I'm the most decorated female freeskeer in history That is so...

I didn't see that. It was so fucking bad. Like at first she laughs at him. Yeah. And then answers. And, oh, man, it's very satisfying. I'm going to watch that straight after this. Yeah, it's good.

So, Nell, second favourite child, has a tribute. Ooh. Writing. Hello, Jess, Matt and Dave. I've been able to up my membership, which I've wanted to do since the very beginning. This is thanks to my late dad or dar, Warwick Arthur Smith. What a name.

was for short, I guess. Was. Was. I mean, hopefully it's, I'm saying that respectfully. Yes. Respectfully. Respectedly. Before he passed, he told me, don't blow up your inheritance. I put the up in there. Don't blow your inheritance.

Don't blow up. Her inheritance was T&T. Don't blow it up. I think he'd be okay knowing I've been able to repay the group of people who emotionally carried me through a messy divorce provided many laughs on lonely nights away from my young son, kept the episodes rolling through a global pandemic, filled broken nights of sleep while feeding newborn babies in 21 and 24,

and kept my company on countless commutes to and from work. But this tribute is meant for my dear Dar, not for you three. I wrote him this before he passed. It doesn't feel finished, but it is a tribute nonetheless. Four was for WAS. It was your strong hands that pulled me out from under the water when I took one step too far. It was your words of praise I sought in everything I ever did. It was the smell of your aftershave and tobacco, following you down the hall.

It was the coffee on the balcony watching the puppies play. It was the gallery visits, the movies, the beach holidays. It was live music, the record player, the radio in the car. It was Friday night football and gin rubbing on the rug. It was long drives and Pepsi and pies. It was childhood at its best. I thought it was forever. You will be forever was.

Thank you for creating this pod. I'm so grateful to you now more than ever. Oh my God. Now that is so lovely. Beautiful. Love that. I don't know if I'm meant to be saying was as an initialism or as an acronym, which is something Dave taught me.

Uh-huh. In, like, episode four or something, I reckon. Yeah, I, yeah. WAS was. Oh, that's so nice. That's so lovely. I just held it together there. Yeah, beautiful words.

Hmm. So sweet. Oh, my God. So lovely. Cheers, Nell. Bob Anshazzar. Fantastic round of fact quotes and questions this week. If you want to get involved,

Sydney-Shaunberg level or above on the Patreon. The next thing we do, we shout out to a few of other great supporters who are on the shout-out level or above. And Justin only comes up with the game for this part. Yes, I do. That's actually so true. Pizza? What are you putting on a pizza?

Oh, wait. Where they're there from, right? We call it the whatever pizza. Yes. And it's just a thing that they probably would. wouldn't have there, but maybe you could... Great. You know what I mean?

Yep. Me and Dave will do the thing. You do the topping? Sure. Because you're a pizza fissionado. Mm-hmm. All right. Dave, I'll do the place you do the name or vice versa.

Happy with that? Yeah. Ahead on that. Oh, address unknown for the first one here. Can only show him from deep within the fortress of the malls. So I was going to see if there's a pizza topping generator. All right. Well, I just loads that up.

This person, like Matt said, he's in the fortress of the malls, but we'd like to say hello and and thank you down there in the fortress. in the fortress to Hazel Francis. Oh my God, I love that name. Where are they from? They're from Fortress of the Moles. Oh, Fortress of the Moles. Great.

Okay. So what are we calling the pizza? Well, I guess the Mollish. The Mollish. The Mollish pizza. And it's got, so this is great. So I have found a pizza topping generator and it gives you four toppings. Okay.

Oh, okay. So you're going to build it for us? Yeah. So it's got Philly steak, bacon, beef crumble, and, tomatoes. That's so good. It's a cheese. It's pizza.

I've gone for a, this is veggies and meat. I can do just meat or vegetarian. We're assuming cheese, I guess. Oh yeah. Still got the tomato sauce and the cheese. When they said tomato at the end, I'm like,

hang on. You can have fresh tomato on a pizza as well. Of course you can. And I'd recommend that you do. Ah, that's so good. All right. Next one comes from London in Great Britain. Hello and thank you to George.

Just so you know who your email includes the number one in it. Okay. So George's number one. And the London. And the London. The London. The London.

The London. The London. Black olives. Oh, man. Yes. Beef crumble again. I don't know what that is. Me either.

I'm not looking into it. And roasted red peppers. Oh, that sounds good. That sounds pretty good. Beef crumble doesn't sound, I don't, it doesn't sound like I want on a pizza. Okay.

Oh, okay. Yeah. So like sort of mincey sort of. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I hope that, I mean, it feels like this. A.I. you're using? I assume it is. Yeah. A highly trained AI.

Yes. Is just obsessed with ground beef. Okay. So on the Woolworth's website. Me too! At the Primo Cook and Create. Yeah, which is a crumbled beef and it says for a delicious supreme pizza. So there you go. It is like a ground beef. Okay.

From... I've never heard of. Oh my God. Lola Land, Los Angeles. It's Owen Eubel. Or E. Oh, my God. Great name. Sorry, I've put an extra R in the... LA, the L.A. Pizza.

Yeah, I was going to say order in LA from me. Could I get a, hey, one a lot, you get a family L.A. Pizza. We're in a pizza shop, so I just say. You need a name for the order. How about Owen Eble? Erbo. It's E.B.

I put an R in there, Erbel, but it's E. B. Eberle. Maybe it's Eberle. Eberl. Maybe it's Eberl. Owen, I'm so sorry that I've stopped this up. Now you're the chef, so I'm yelling ingredients at you.

We need sausage, hot banana peppers, Brooklyn pepper. Oh, coming right up. That sounds like, that could be good. Again, I don't clearly know what some of them is. I was like, bleak, a hot banana peppers. We're going to need a Torrance pizza from Torrance in California. Who's ordering? Who's it for?

Noah Anderson. Again, beef crumble, pepperoni mushroom chicken. Okay. Meat heavy, that one. Meat heavy. And could mushroom meat for vegetarians. From Flamington here in Melbourne, Victoria. We're shouting out to Suki and Minty.

What a name. It's got pepperoni, green pepper, baby spinach and onion. Oh, again, fantastic. That sounds really good. That's the Flemington. From Seattle in Washington. From Seattle. Oh my gosh, the names are the best.

Rex Quimpo. Whoa. Run that town for T&D. All right. Rex Quimpa. That's really good. Pepperoni, jalapeno peppers, baby spinach, green pepper. Oh.

Lots of pepper, it's a spicy one. That's a bit colourful too. I'm far, man, I'm so in as hot peppers at the moment. It's because you're old and like you need to feel something. You need to feel something. They make me, I'm going, oh, I'm aloft. I'm alive and I'm sweating on the brow. From Amisfort in Utrecht in the Netherlands, maybe, Nell.

I think that's right. Serynthian or Sirenthon Kist. Great name, Sirenthon Kist. The ingredient that started all of this, pineapple. Yeah, here it is another. Can we just say that we have ordered pizzas in a tiny little break? They are two minutes away. So let's get through this and I'll go get the pizzas.

I've got a pineapple and mine. Pineapple, olive. Oh, green olives, black olives, chicken. I've got a chicken pineapple pizza coming up. Oh, I should have ordered two types of olives. That would have been the Amers Fort. Amos Fort, which I'm pretty sure Al said Trumbly Birtchel visited Amis Fort and hung out with one of our listener friends. Oh, we might also be a two in the think tank this one.

Oh, I see. There is cross-over. If I'm remembering that correctly, but maybe one day we do an Amst Fort live show. Yeah. Next, again, from Adjus Anonik, only shooting from deep within the fortress of the mall. So this is kind of like the mole too.

Yeah. And it's for Grace M. Ham, onion, sausage, mushroom. Oh, ham sausage. Yeah, I like it. I like that a lot. And finally, from Merriville, Tennessee, maybe, in the United States. Big shout out to Kathy with a K.

The Meriville? that's going to be a Philly steak, jalapinos, beef crumble, and bacon. They've done it. I actually would eat that. Maryville.

If you've got cheese and tomato as well. Yeah. That's a good thing. I don't think you're on a family size. No. They're on a thin crust. Gorgeous. That's a bit much.

Thank you so much to Kathy Grace, Serenathon, Rex, Suki, Noah, Owen, George and Hazel. Next thing we need to do is shout out to some of our great Patreon. supporters who've been on the shoutout level or above for three straight years. I might leave you to it then.

Please do. Obviously, I already know that Jess is doing many Hawaiian pizzas and pinocoladas behind the bar. It's actually the best thing she's served up for a long time. It sort of harkens back to when she sort of made food. Made food. It's inevitable and drinkable. On the straight and narrow. I appreciate that.

Have you booked a band? Yeah, you're never going to believe it. Who's that? You're never going to believe. Oh, my. God, as we were talking about Pearl Harbor, but now we're all going to be talking about Pearl Jam.

Whoa! That's right. Whoa. So, Eddie Vedder solo at the... Can I imagine their quality live act. Yeah. elderly woman behind a counter in a small town.

What a tune. Is that a great song? That's an Avetta solo. I seem to recognize. You know what? I don't think so. You're free. I like to hear it.

Hey, it's Pearl Jam, but he played it solo and at Pelham. Oh, there you go. I love it. So Pearl Jam played a festival in New Orleans. Really? Will they a headline act? One of them, I think, yeah. It's an incredibly key to act like that.

They're one of the headlines. Yeah, yeah. Because often of those American festivals, you're like, this? Yeah. Like the top five people could headline here. Yeah, totally. That's awesome. So what are we even booking a band for, do?

This is the TripDitch Club. I'm not sure if we said this is for people who have been on the shadow level or above for three consecutive years that haven't dropped off. So do thank them to enshrine them. We welcome them into our clubhouse. It's a bit of a theater of mine kind of thing. People run on in. We give them a big cheer. Once you're inside, there's food, drinks.

There's all sorts of things. there's, like we talk about hockey. We've got slot machines and you always win, which is pretty freaking good. And we should say once you're and you can never leave, but while do you want to? Because you're surrounded by about 1,000 of the greatest people on Earth as well as all the best things. And we always have music today's Pearl Jam and food. And it's great. Jess has arrived.

Dougie's here with the pizzas. Mama Mayor. How's about a tip? Work hard and be good to your mother. Now, we got four inductees this week. The way this works is, I'm on the door, I'm going to read out your name. Dave's going to hype you up with a bit of weak wordplay and then Jess is going to hype him up. It was so funny, Dave was doing a weak word play before we started recording this episode.

And Jess was not hyping him up. I wasn't on the clock. Wasn't on the clock. And Dave was like, what's happening? Oh, yeah. I did say, oh, it's too much context. but even with context it sucked, you have to...

Do you have to repeat it? Knocky on some abs. If I said that in this... If I said that in this section, you'd be forced to hype me off, which I love so much. You'd be like, woo, knocky on those abs. All right, so we've got four inductees this week.

I refuse to explain. These people's been on the shoutout level for three straight years. Are we good to go? Yeah. From Middlesbrough in Great Britain, please welcome in Daniel Daniel Lindsay. The opposite of Danielle, it's Danielle.

More like Danny Heaven. Yes, there it is. That's what I'm implying. From Scottsdale, Arizona in the United States. Welcome in David Green. Best I've ever seen, David Green. Man, I can smell a barbecue sauce. From Manly West in Queensland, Australia.

Welcome in Hannah Hicks. Uh, Hannah, cana. I have a high five. From you. Sometimes it is hard to help. Woo! Give me the high-five, Hannah. Hicks.

Hickey? You see, I thought of them on. That was a bit much. Hannah. Can I? Have a high-five was better to you. Canna? Have a high-five.

Hicks. Woo! No, that's good. It's good. Move on. Yes. The landing sticks. No, all right.

It's hard. It's hard. It's hard. We think you're freaking amazing. Yeah. Won't throw a spanner in your works. No, yeah. That's not bad.

Better than fucking. Kana. Have a huffer. And finally from... Jesus Christ, North Thirpig in New South Wales. Welcome in Zoe D.L. D.L. and Pasco, Molly, D.L. and Zoe.

You remember that show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thank you. You really need to remember. Otherwise, I sound insane. But also, I think that that show really helped get the pronunciation of D.L. Yeah, that's right. There's a Z in there.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Welcome into the club. I thought you'd misread. Well, I did in the past, because Zoe's given some great questions for who knew. it. Now you've got it. Love and Loaded. Welcome into the club, Zoe, Hannah, David and Danielle make yourselves right at home.

And this doesn't happen every week, but it is happening this week. We have an inductee into the Triple Triptage Club. Oh my gosh. This is for people who've been signed up on the shoutout level for nine straight years. Oh, wow. We open up the extra section of the place for you. A second velvet rope. Yes.

And inside there's just like gold everywhere. and there's like Leonardo DiCaprio's painted your portraits. Yeah, yeah, everything. Like a French girl. Yeah. So it's a reverse Titanic. No, that is Titanic. Yes.

I thought for the second he was the French girl. No. He's not the French girl. In this section, he can be. He can be. He'll sit for you if you want. That's how important you are. So this is just the 13th inductee into the Triple Triptitch Club.

Now, they will also, for me, they'll be assigned an episode from our back catalog, which they will be the caretaker of. I was thinking I might even go back into the old show notes and start putting caretaker in their name. That's fun. That's fun. Dave, you salute them and say something that comes to your mind at random. Like a bit of a compliment.

And then Jess gives you a kiss, air kiss. All right. So are we ready? We'll say. I'll see. Or if it's there. Maybe. Maybe.

Could be a big old sloppy patch. Sloppy push. Sloppy push. I've got to actually look up which episode that I'm assigning them. And you thought, rather than searching the number, you'll scroll all the way back. Look at 500 plus episodes. I'm actually a really quick scroller. Oh my God.

A beautiful tribute. All right. Please welcome in to the triple triptitch club from. Madison in WV State, West Virginia. Well. Welcome in Tyler Thompson. Tyler Thompson, you complete me. Salute.

And you are now officially the caretaker of episode 13, Queen Elizabeth II. Oh, long may she rain. Oh, wow. That brings us to the end of the episode. Welcome to the club, Tyler. I'll send you over to Leo and you can either paint him or be painted by him or whatever you like. He's on the clock. He'll do whatever you.

He'll do whatever you are. Whatever you want. And yeah, anything we need to tell people before we go, Boppa? They can suggest a topic if they'd like. There's a link in the show notes. It's also on our website, which is do go on pod.com. And you can find us on social media. Do go on pod or do go on podcast.

Sorry, I got distracted because I was. I was, I think... Smelling pizza? No, because I was looking at who Guthrie is following and he's following us. Did he follow us back? Oh, I must have followed us back. What? The Guff?

In the last 30 minutes? He hasn't posted for years, but he's still obviously... Yeah. Then I was like, I must be looking at the wrong thing, but no, followers is us, sure. That's not right. But I think he's following... The Guth can't be following, no. Yeah, no, I think so.

Anyway, let's... What the heck? Guth, maybe hearing this, we're big fans. Big fans of your work. Big fans of your work. All right, boot this baby home, Dave. Hey, we'll be back next week. Honestly, he would probably come up in his feed if he does follow us because...

Yeah, he followed us back. We'll put this episode out and he'll be like, oh, the Niki, how I've been to that island. What's the he's listening right now? Hey. Sorry for objectifying you. Just based on your name, I expected you to be 80 years old and we're tweed and you seem like a young cool guy. Yeah, you look like... You're younger than us.

You're like, you know, Luke Perry and... Yes. fifth element sort of. But also a great journalist, that's more important. I read your entire business inside our article. I think it's fantastic. I've linked to it below if people want to read your great work, so thank you very much.

Well, until next week, when we find another journalist to follow on Instagram, and objectify. Look, if he's listening for first time, don't make it sound like we do this all. We don't do this all the time. You're special. You are the only one for us.

Yes. We'll be about next week with another episode. Until then, thank you so much. And until then, it's goodbye. And later. And bye. And people. It's a...

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