Do Go On - 96 - The Great Maple Syrup Heist

Episode Date: August 23, 2017

This week's episode focusses on (maybe) the most Canadian crime ever, the great maple syrup heist! Thousands of barrels of the sweet stuff went missing in 2012, how did it happen? How do you steal so much syrup?!? Find out and hear Jess laugh lots along the way! Support the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: patreon.com/DoGoOnPod Twitter: @DoGoOnPod Instagram: @DoGoOnPod Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod Email us: [e-mail] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Melbourne and Canada, we got exciting news for you. And we should also say this is 2026. Jess, what year is it? 2026. Thank God you're here. Right now, I'm in Melbourne doing my show with Serengy Amarna, 630 each night at the Cooper's Inn Hotel, having so much fun. We'd love to see you there. Canada, we are visiting you in September this year.

If you've somehow missed the news, we are heading up Vancouver, Calgary, Montreal and Toronto for shows. That's going to be so much fun. Tickets for all this stuff, I believe, are online. And I'm here too. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. Welcome to another episode of DoGo on. My name is Dave Warnocky and I'm talking into a microphone with a couple of others talking into microphones.

It's Jess Perkins and Matt Stewart. This is a microphone? What do you think it was a paddle pop? Yes. And I was like, the flavour is lacking. Why am I talking into it? Yeah. I was like, why are you guys talking into your deletops?

delicious treats. Mine tastes good. Maddie, stop licking it. You don't know whose mouths have been on that. I know exactly his mouths of been on it. How are you, boys? I'm so good. Matt's pretty good.

I'm so good. Matt's just come back from a sweet little jaunt in Brisbane. Had a great time in Brisbane, actually. Yeah, it was a lot of fun. You have a lot of listeners. People up there are keen to get us up to do a live pod. And I... And we refuse.

No, we'd love to. No, yeah. I was going to say, hopefully, you guys. guys don't mind but I kind of I basically promised a few different people that we'd be coming up later this year. Okay, cool. Okay, who did you promise? The mayor? The mayor, Mr. Mayor. I'm also Mrs. Mayor. Damn it. He's a double whammy. I was going to say Tom Tate, my favorite mayor, but that's Gold Coast, which we could also visit. Tommy Tate's there as well. How do you know the mayor of Gold Coast? He is a great source of humor. Okay. Is he better than the mayor of Jolong?

Yes, is that still that, the paparazzi blood? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't don't think so. The go of the fake six-pack. Yeah. On top of a big old... So, if you're from overseas and you don't know, we once had a mayor who was a fat guy. Not we. Geelong.

Geelong, which is a city that's really close to Melbourne, had a mayor... Was he named Darren? Yeah. Darren something, who was a former paparazzi that worked in England. And he's a fat guy, but he wanted to look muscular, so he got, like, a surgical implants to make him look like he had six-back over his fat. And he always had, like, a rainbow mohaw.

His hair was always very interesting. He was a real cool guy. He's so cool. Wait, hang on. But he is. Yeah, I know. Anyway, but Brisbane was a good time, Matt? Brisbane was a real good time.

Yeah, had a really fun time. Did some fun shows. But yeah, Hayah Bar up there was really good. So, I don't know. I liked it up there. There was one guy I liked who brought a few friends. I don't know if they were listeners or not, but they were very nice people.

That's good. His name was the Honorable Gareth Jones, and he works for a company, according to his ticket purchasing information. Huge dildos incorporated. You got me a beauty there, Honorable Gareth. And yet, yes, Matt, does check every person who comes to his show's personal details. No, the venue actually pointed that out to me. Oh, okay.

They're like, did you see this guy? Also met a listener called Chelsea, and I met a bunch of listeners. They're all very cool people. I shouldn't single any of them out. But here you are doing exactly that. Gareth and Chelsea, just two names that are on the top of my head. But so many nice cool people came along. Also, Shepard, who is a Twitter follower as well.

Yep. Who's one of those ones that never shows his face. And I saw his face. Oh my God. Yeah. Well, thank you to the people of Brisbane for taking some pity on our little Maddie. Yeah, thanks. Thanks, guys.

And soldiering on through that hour of pain and suffering. Yeah, I didn't know. There's no good. I know. No, we have to sit through it next week. We will. That's right. Matt is bringing his hour of pain and suffering tour to...

No, that's cool. It's comedy. To Sydney. It's a comedy show. I mean, it's subjective, isn't it? It is subjectively, a comedy show. Objectively, objectively. There we go, yeah.

Oh, my God. But you are coming to Sydney this weekend, Matt. And as are Jess and I for our live show on Sunday, do not forget it sold out. But if you are a ticket holder, please do come down to the Chippo Hotel this Sunday afternoon. What if no one came? That'd be amazing. Well, we'd have...

Oh yeah, we'd have the money. We'd have a party. And we could just hang out. We'd probably just record the episode. In fact, no one come. We'd still have to make the recording happen because we've got to put the episode out that week. It'll just sound really empty and sad.

We'll probably just take it back to the hotel room. Oh yeah, okay. Get drunk. Yes. All right. I reckon. I'm sober. No, not.

So if you didn't get a ticket of the live show, you can come there and still be in the same room as us. One of us will be talking. It'll be like one of the episodes where I do a report like today. I can heckle you if you like if people want to hear our voices. If you guys could chip in. If you could, yeah, if you want to take a little break from your little show, your little skits and riddles,

Dave or I could jump up. Yeah, I'll tag in at any time. Yeah. I'm going to, I'll tag you guys in at some point. I know some of your bits. I do too. I'm really... And not your comedy bits.

And I'll do them. You're going to do them a bit. Slive. Dave. Dave, I don't believe you. You still haven't humped a watermelon. Your name is mud. That's because you refuse to film it.

I do not refuse. Well, I mean, I won't film it, sure. But, yeah, I guess I do refuse. Well, speaking of other things that we promised we would do, we also had a Patreon goal that you or I would get a tattoo. And we put that out to the people. and Matt, you kind of put the poll out there. Dave and I actually don't know the results.

Oh, right. Oh, cool. I've known the results for a little while. So it's closed. Like, we're legit not being kept in the loop. It's closed. And I mean, it's closed. And even if it wasn't, there was, there weren't enough people left who could have

in the world. In the world. It was that much of a answer. We had more than 4 billion votes. And the votes went by more than 70%. Wow. Closer to 80% to Jess Perkins. I'm genuinely surprised.

I would have thought people would have loved to have seen you in pain. I was thinking that just because they could have chosen my tattoo seemed like a more exciting thing. But I think in the end they were just like, Jess wants it more. Which is so lovely and so typical of our listeners. We were like, oh, let's give Jess something. You guys are the best. So I'm going to get a tattoo. Look, 7 and 80% of them are the best.

Yeah, the other. And the other ones, look, I'm with them. If I was them, I would have voted for me as well. No doubt about it. And I was willing to get something pretty wild. So I'm probably relieved. Maybe in the future. So what are you going to get, Jess?

I'm going to get a banana playing the ukulele. Oh, this is so good. And it also has a swastika tattoo on its arm. Whoa. It's not me. It's the banana who loves it. Is that a political statement? Weird.

I don't understand. It's what I want. Oh, it's true. Okay, that's what you want. I love ukuleleys. Oh, no. Okay. Don't go on.

You're really trying to... Trying to take some heat from me here. I appreciate it. I thought we'd sort of moved on from any sort of sympathies, but... Look, it... It slipped out of my mouth. And you just kept chasing it. Let's pod.

All right, well, we will be filming Jess getting that tattoo very, very soon. We also did another poll, or I did a poll personally, for my topic this week, and I put out to the all the people for the first time and there were, I gave 10 options, right? Whoa. And they were all based on Canada. So they're all Canadian related topics. Awesome. One came out in front by like a decent margin.

It got over a third of the votes. It was a pretty, pretty chunky result. Oh, wow. And you got quite a few votes this time? Yeah, there were hundreds and hundreds and hundreds. That's fucking cool. Awesome. That's great. But the winner, or I guess I asked the question.

And the reason people ask me to do a Canadian report is because there's a celebration of 150 years of white settlement there, I guess. It's a slightly controversial one because much like our own Australia Day, people, like it's really split the country. I don't know as much about Canada, obviously, and I really probably am not in any place to talk about it. So maybe I shouldn't. I've got a couple of questions. But it's more about it's like people. wondering is it is it should we be celebrating this event that is was so painful to the indigenous peoples of the country go like our some of the one of the

maybe it's Vancouver have called their celebration Canada 150 plus sort of like and they they almost called it off I just I think it was Vancouver they were talking about it may be being inappropriate but they ended up sort of talking to community groups and so anyway that that's not what this topic is about that's why the Canadian topic vote happened. And we had a few Canadian people

being like, hey, talk about my great country. Yeah. We have done a few in the past. We did the one about the Montreal screw job, which was quite Canadian-related. We also did... Montreal being in the title.

Yes, that's true. That helps. But also the key wrestler there was a Canadian man. But also Dave did a topic... The October crisis. Which is a classic... Canadian kidnapping story.

If you haven't heard that one, I'd never heard of it before. It's fun. Anyway, here's the question for this week's topic. What is said to be the most significant agricultural crime ever committed in Canada? Agricultural crime. Oh, the great corn steel. Oh man, that is so close. That is so ridiculously close.

What are you talking about? The great something, something heist is what it is. The great corn heist. It's the great maple syrup heist. Even more. Man, so seriously. It was so good. Corn syrup is like, oh yeah.

That is so good. That's what I meant. I meant corn syrup heist, everyone. You misspoke and you meant maple syrup. Dave got it, everybody. Yay. So I had to go a little more Canadian on your food stuff. The great maple syrup heist.

Man, we could have made moose jokes. I'm so sorry. And this was suggested by Megan Elizabeth at Megan Harvey on Twitter. She also offered up herself as a tribute, I think she said. Huh. Which is like, that's like talk from that movie with the Bow and Arrow. Yes. Yes.

The Hunger Games. Blowheart. Oh my God. I think you meant Robin Hood? Blowheart. What did you think? I'm not sure where I was going to. Hang on.

I'm not sure. Why did you think the Hunger Games that youth fiction novel? Heart. There's something about heart in it? No. Blow heart? No. It's one of the main characters called Blowheart.

Catness. Catness. That's it. close. It's like corn to maple syrup. We're nearly nailing it. Low heart. There's no heart in it? No.

She's the mocking Jay. Yep. All right. Well, end of story. That's not the end of the story. Anyway. I said one thing right. Anyway.

You're a Hunger Games fan. Huge. Really? Loved it. The books or the... The books. And the movies were fine. I'm over it now, but I went through a phase of like...

I was up to like 3 a.m. I'm smashing through the book. I loved him. I like Philip Seymour Hoffman. Yeah. He's great. Didn't they had to turn him into a robot or something the last one, didn't they? No.

No. Or animate him? No. I think his scenes are already being filmed, I think. Might have been a different film. I thought that he died before that, the last one. God, we're taking a long time to get... Philips him off one, aka Blow Hard.

Thank you. All right, anyway, so... This topic's better be good, so I can blow heart. Before I get into the heist, which is Blow Heart. So I can Blow Heart. No, Blow Heart is the... He's the wrestler from the Montreal screw job. That's not.

Blow the hit man heart. Isn't that right? Fine if I'm taking requests. So I should probably right up the top, going to talk a little bit about the maple syrup industry in Canada. Right. In particular in Quebec, which is where this all went down. In Quebec, there's an organization called the Federation de lauderdocere

Oh, my God. Acerios de Quebec. I'm so sorry, everyone. They sort of felt French. Did it? How? I was sorry with you. I'm going to call it F-P-P-A-Q, because that's what it abbreviates down to.

In English, it's the Federation of Quebec maple syrup producers, basically. That makes sense. It was set up in 1966, which Jess, as you know, is a good year because the Saints won their only premiership that year. Oh, my God. F-P-P? I was like, this is the first time Matt's ever paused or let me do it. a good year, and it was because you wanted to make a Saints reference. Yeah.

Fair enough. Carry on. England also won the Soccer World Cup. So they're two shit football teams who won their only things in that year. So it was an interesting year. F-Pack is an organisation that regulates the production of maple syrup. They are a private organisation and are sometimes described as a legal cartel. Why, so they're the mobsters of the...

They're like legal mobsters of the maple syrup game. That's crazy. Yeah. How? Okay. Yep. I'm in. The cartel.

I'm in the cartel. Hey. Ask me anything. Hey, I heard them down on New Street. What is that character? I'm trying to be your mobster. But I've sucked in some helium, okay? A Quebecian?

Yeah. Did you hear down on New Street? They got a... What is the facts? They're trying to use maple syrup on their pancakes without paying us off, boss. Is that French-Canadian? Absolutely not. No, that's very offensive.

I'm so sorry to everybody. And now I've gone back to the other character. You have one character. Hey. And it's a great character. Hey, I've also got Michael Kane. That's true. It's fucking two plus.

Does Michael Kane like maple syrup? Hello, I'm Michael Kane, and I do not like Michael, Maple Syrup. I do not like Michael Syrup. In my family, we always called it Michael Syrup. Because I liked it as a kid, but I grew up and I didn't like it anymore. So the F-PAC or the producers represented by F-PAC, the cartel, they produce over... The maple mob. Produce over 70% of the world's syrup.

That's so much of it. And that's just in Quebec. That's so much. That's heaps. 70% of the world, though. Over 70%. And it's just one place makes over... That's heaps, eh?

I don't know what she's doing either. Well, that's syrup. What a lot of response. responsibility they must feel. Hey? It's a lot. F-oh, Syrup.

What's happening. Why won't you look at me? Well, I'm not Jess making fun of you, but usually you're the one who's like, the Spice Girl sold millions of records, guys, it's so good, it's so good. So she's making fun of me for saying... I'm hyped up.

Are you making fun of me for telling you a fact about syrup? I mean, that's what I'm here to do. Just doing my job, Jess. You're not wrong. Do go on. So with this much control over supply, the organisation is also able to control the price, which is what they do. And maple syrup is now worth more than oil. So one source...

What? Sorry, what? Yeah. So one source say that it's worth about $1,300 per barrel, another one saying about $1,600. Obviously, it fluctuates a bit, but it's a lot of money per barrel. I think you were saying that industry-wise, it's worth more. No, no. I was like, holy shit.

No, no, not quite, but just buy the barrel. What if we... It would cost you more to buy a barrel of maple syrup than a barrel of oil, which I think makes sense to me. What if we invented a maple syrup powered car? No, that's a stupid idea because it would cost you so much money. What's that going to help? Is it going to help the environment?

Is that your angle there? Feels like that maybe would help the environment? It smells so good. Those two things are what I was thinking of. You would never need an air freshener. The fumes would be delicious. The money you'd save on air freshen. I mean, they already are, obviously, but.

Yeah. I just try to save the world. One pancake at a time. Yeah, you're under something. The organisation maintains a strategic reserve of syrup. So this is what often these sort of cartels do they, to control supply, they stockpilot rather than so the market isn't flooded. My syrup.

Mine. After a big harvest, you know, they'll stockpilot so that in the leaner years. they can maintain supply and maintain the price. Is it in one like giant fish tank? They've got an aquarium that they bought from the Canadian government filled it with maple syrup.

There's one shark in there and it is not okay. He's not very well. No, that's definitely not what happened. So this reserve, right, they call it the International Strategic Reserve paired with the fact that they produce a high percentage

of the world's product. This means that they can control the supply. It is sometimes referred to as the OPEC of maple syrup. I think they're often being pejorative when they do that. But, you know, OPEC being the organisation of the petroleum exporting countries. Yeah.

And what do we put petroleum in? A lot of things. Cars. Point well made. It's a point well made. Your honour, I rest my case. The defence rests. The strategic reserves are spread across a few warehouses in rural.

Quebec towns, including in St. Anton de Tilly, which is the largest. Well, I didn't try and do with a French accent, because you really... No, go for it. No, hey, you're right. Maddie. This one holds over 6,000 tons. There's also one in Placisville, with around 1,500 tons. And after a bumper season, they opened a third warehouse in Saint-Lau.

A third aquarium. De Bluffon. Which holds four and a half thousand tons. Fish. St. Louis de Blanford. Yeah, four and a half fish. A thousand. This last warehouse was set up in 2011,

and our story starts the following year. Oh, this is recent. In July, 2012. Fuck, I was so close. Sorry, Jess. When you hear the maple syrup ice, I'm thinking like this is 1880s. Yeah, it does sound like it really old,

but it's 2012. It's a current thing. still in the media. Awesome. Is it the Canadian media? In the Canadian media. That would make sense. But I'm wondering if this is like a big story over there where, because I've never heard

of it. It is a, but apparently it's made worldwide headlines because it is such an eye-catching story. It's just a wild sounding story and it's just, I think people love it because it's so, it sounds, you saw a lot of international reports being like the most Canadian crime ever. I think for a podcast Because they're famous for maple syrup. A wild sounding story is very beneficial.

Do you know? Like if this story was visually provocative, we'd be fucked. I reckon Mac could describe it. But a wild sounding. Close your eyes now, please. Picture this. Unless you're driving. It was a Canadian summer's day

when Michael Guevaro was doing an annual inventory check at the St. Louis de Blufford Warehouse. St. Louis de Bluffin. Warehouse. It's a small town northeast of Montreal with a population of approximately 900 people. So a very small town. You're picturing that in your mind's eye?

Just? Keep those fucking eyes closed. Okay. Dave. I was talking to Dave. I can't tell. My eyes are closed. You enjoy that too much.

That was very nice. Dave. Is that one? You look like when you sleep because it's creepy. Look, I'm going to make a confession. I have to close my eyes hard because otherwise they drift open. I'm not even... I sleep.

Drift open. You'll find when we tour this weekend, my eyes just open, and I sleep with them halfway open. And I woke up with dry eyes. So you were laughing at a medical condition, Miss Perkins. How dare you, Jess? I have to close my eyes hard. So hard. Close my eyes so hard.

Good night. Not, yeah. I'm going to sleep so hard tonight. Fucking come at me dreams. That all you got? Unicorns, yeah, that all you got. No, that's pretty good, actually. Yeah, stick with our back.

Yeah, that's good. I'm winning a gold medal of the Olympics. And Nan's alive. Yes, great. Yeah, it's a hard room. Real hard. Picture this, Dave, the warehouse. was floor to ceiling with big barrels of maple syrup.

Floor to ceiling. It's in photos of it. It's just like it's just chockers. How do you get to the top one? Do they have a big ladder like Bell has in Beauty and the Beast? The way they talk about it with Gavro, it was just like he was climbing across them. So he's just doing an inventory ride, just checking in. One?

Yeah. One a barrel. Two a barrel. I don't know why he says it with the A and the three your barrel. Nine and a four. A little rhythm to it. A five a barrel. A six a barrel.

A seven, a barrel. More. And then he just like writes more. Many, many barrels. So many barrels. But he was climbing across the barrels apparently to count them or whatever. And he wasn't really expecting to find anything out of the ordinary. It was just every year they do this and it's just checking the barrels.

Having a great time. Sure. This guy loves counting barrels. Stock take. Very many stock takes. But then as he climbed high, he felt, that a barrel below him was much lighter than it should have been, so light that he struggled to hold his weight on top of it,

and it nearly toppled over. This was strange as barrels should weigh over 600 pounds, or 270 kilos. And he weighs less than that. He weighs much, much less. I didn't know. I wasn't imagining a giant man. They had his eyes closed hard,

and he could picture. Some sort of sumo wrestler climbing barrels. So when it sort of toppled, he went up to it and he tapped the barrel, and it made like a gong sound. No, he tapped it and he heard a little, hello! Ah, get out of there. Get out of there.

I'll just be a minute. Hey, what are you doing in there? You filling up the barrel? After it wobbling, then tapping and making a gong sound, he's like, maybe I should check. Like, this guy's going to do like a nine-step check. I reckon I would have skipped from the nearly toppling to the lid. Straight away.

He's going to smell it first. I'm going to listen. Listen to see there's maple syrup in there. I don't want to jump to any conclusions. I'm going to sleep out tonight with the barrel. See if anything happens. I'm going to buy the barrel dinner and see if it lets me in itself. Oh, playing hard to get.

Okay, I'll just have to open up the lid. Oh, what the fuck! It's empty. Where's the fucking serum? I just paid for dinner. What did you buy the barrel? $60 bottle of wine. Steak?

No, just liquor. I only had $60 in my card. His first instinct was that this was just a little anomaly. One empty barrel in a warehouse full of full barrels. So it was just empty. It was just empty. I was hoping there'd be something in there. Maybe there's like a ransom note.

Or like an ancient golden artifact. Jess thinks this is going to be a really wild. wild story. You said it was pretty wild. Did I say it was wild? You said it was wild. Where Syrup has been replaced by ancient golden artefacts. Yeah.

Look Jess, he said it's going to be a cool story, but don't aim that. I don't even think I said it was a cool story. You said wild. Did I? You said the word wild. I'm prone to hyperbole. Anyway, please wind back your expectations. Never.

They are sky high. So tell us more about this artifact. What did it look like? Is it big? Was it solid gold? Was it of a fairer? How did it get to Canada? Did the Queen once own it?

I mean, you're asking a lot of questions. All the answers will be there as the report goes on. We always jump ahead to the ancient artefacts. We get so excited. So he didn't think he was going to find any more empty ones, but soon more barrels were found. And inside them, more ancient golden artefacts. Every time did he go through his nine-step process?

Tap, tap, tap, listen, listen. Fucking ages. $60 bottle of wine. He's broke. I've spent 60 grand. A thousand bottles of wine. Some of those that seemed to be full were actually full of water as well. Oh.

So there were some empty, but many more were just sitting there full of water. Like when you take your parents' liquor and you top up the bottle with water. Very much like that. If you're smart, you do it with tea. That's good. I get. I've heard. But that would affect the taste more, I would think.

Yeah. Your parents aren't idiot. Oh, no, yeah. Because you've finished it entirely. Yeah, Matt doesn't muck around. It affects the taste because there's no more alcohol in there. Matt wasn't having a sip, but he was drinking the whole bottle and going, oh, shit. Oh, no.

Better pop a brew on. Matt's making tea again. Every Sunday, Mom. Every Sunday. I love a cupper. Anyway, I'll just be in the den next to your liquor. No reason. Isn't a den?

That is classic affluent. I didn't. Imagine having a den. You couldn't afford a fucking ten. A den? We had a run. The way your lines were. Didn't you have nine to a bedroom at one state in your house?

Four. Four to a bedroom. That's all of you. Yeah. Why were you all in one room? It was a two bedroom house. And all four kids in one room. Yeah, all right.

Two bedrooms, but how many dens? We didn't have a den. Oh, they didn't have a den. It's bloody bullshit. How quaint. How the other half-way. What is it a den even mean? Is that like a second lounge?

Yeah, come on. Third lounge? Matt, yeah, a rumpus room. A formal dining room. A media centre. An informal dining room. Pool house, billiard room, library, study, smoking room, greenhouse, plus nine bedrooms. And various weapons.

Yeah, of course there's also secret rooms, but I won't talk about them on the show. Obviously. And that's just the bungalow. So nearly Why would the bungal I have a pool house You fucking idiot We're very People

You know they have money They don't know what to do with it People people Oh people please Bada bada bada buma So nearly 540,000 gallons of syrup Had been stolen

Fuck Which was a really big chunk Of their strategic reserves That's like millions of liters Okay thank you I was gonna ask what a gallon How much a gallon is I'm saying

And millions of millions of millions millions of dollars worth. Oh. And that's how one of the largest agricultural crime investigations began. The F-PAC headquarters were alerted and the cops were brought in. Is there a specific branch of the police for agriculture? No, for maple syrup, I imagine, in Canada. They're that serious about it.

Very good. Like us with beer. Get the beer squad out. Detective Smith, beer squad. There's this fun vanity fair article. Was it fun? You shut. You shut.

That's so fun. Anyway, it was a lot of fun. It's fun. It's a lot of fun. Vanity Fun. Vanity Fun. Vanity fun. Vanity fun.

And asked some great questions about the mystery like, who would still syrup? And even if some sick bastard wanted to, what would he carry it away in? How far could he get? Good questions. I'm wondering all these things. That is.

So fun. It's fun, man. That's fun. You better watch. You better watch yourself. I'm really hyped. I'm going to just stay quiet for a little bit. You sound a little drunk. You totally do.

Have you been drinking? Have you been into your mum's liquor cabinet in the den again? Shai, you don't know me. You don't know me, Mum. I don't live with my mum. Go drink a fucking tea, Mum. I mean, bourbon. I miss her every day.

She's not dead. I just don't live with her. Yeah, but Nan's alive in your dreams. Cohen who wrote the Vanity Fair article went on to say that there was something stirring about making off with all that syrup It boggled the mind It felt less like a crime than a prank What you might do to your brother if you were

An all-powerful And he had a lot of syrup And you wanted to steal two million litres of syrup I really enjoyed Cohen's work there It's a prank I've stolen several hundred million dollars of syrup. Gotcha.

But I mean, you're making a joke of a joke that he already made. Dave, all right? Not to know and you, but... Hey, hey, vanity fair, there's no joke there. That is another joke. He was having fun. I don't think he was. He spoke to a hotel waiter in Montreal

and the waiter said, syrup is heavy and sticky. How do you hide it? Who do you get to smuggle it? Where can you sell it? Down your pants. It's like stealing salt out of the sea. Down your pants.

Absolutely. That's how you smuggler that you put down in pants. It's like stealing salt out of the sea. Yeah, I don't think it's like that at all. It's like stealing syrup out of barrels. If you can steal salt out of sea, you could probably get syrup out of trees yourself. Is that where syrup comes from? Yeah, it's sap.

Is it tree blood? I think it's like sap and then they do stuff to it and then it like thins it out and maybe it like whatever. You know, I can't tell you all this. the secret. Sounds like you're working for them. But anyway, what a bloody mystery? Any theories at this point? Because I'm about to tell you what happened.

I'm staying quiet. Matt, it's got to be an inside job. You can't just steal that. Inside job is good, Dave. Without people knowing. You want to build on inside job? Half a million gallons. It's ridiculous.

It's not like if someone stole 10 barrels and suddenly Barry was having a bit more pancakes than usual, you'd be like, all right, well, fucking Barry did it. Barry. It wasn't Barry. But good guess, Jess. you get the final guess.

You know, you asked me if I want to build on inside job. Mm-hmm. It's an inside pants job. It happened inside pants. They put the maple soup down their pants and just walked on out. That feels like my knot near. But like pants with like a tight cuff at the bottom. Oh my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, it's the worst. Well, like some sort of scuba diving outfit, but that keeps the liquid in. Yeah. Like they've lined themselves with baking paper. What are those pants you wear when you go fishing? Gumboots. They're filled gumboots.

It's brilliant. My favourite heist is when it ends with them walking out the front door. Yeah. Of the maple syrup shop. Doing a shooey of maple syrup on the front doorstep. Yeah. That's my theory. Celebratory shooey.

All right. Or a gumby in Dave's case. So the investigation was initially led by the Quebec police before the Royal Mounties came in. and got involved. Just making it super Canadian. Did you see Dudley do, right? Yeah, I reckon I did back in the day with Brendan Fraser. Yeah.

Heard and Frasier. It looks like he's falling on hard times. All right, I've flown east. The investigation was broad and costly. They didn't have a lot to go on, but they chased up every lead. Any talk of black market syrup, they were all over it. Can you say it was broad and costly again? Just trust me, it'll be worth it. It was broad and costly.

Well, I'm a costly broad. It wasn't worth it. I'm not sure. Can we just get Jess's mic? Yep, it's off. I did say I'd be quite. I'm sorry. It's now officially off.

It was, so it was a huge investigation. Around 300 people were questioned and 40 search warrants were taken out. And it was all worth it because it led to the arrests of 26 people. Those 26 arrests led to varying results. Some charges were dropped. Some charges were dropped. Some were acquitted. And I believe there is ongoing legal action actually in this case.

It's that recent that it's still happening. So I should say allegedly a lot, probably. But these are all, all this is from court reports. Just wondering what their plan was. Was it extortion? Were they going to try and sell it? Yeah, I think this probably tells us how current it is. There's not even a Wikipedia page dedicated to it yet.

We could be that Wikipedia page. We could be a source. We could be a source. Someone do that. That would be cool. We could be a source or a syrup or a syrup or a, Yeah, no, I'm going back off. Sorry. I don't know how she turned herself back on there.

Though court action is still ongoing now, it does seem like the investigation was pretty efficient, obviously with those arrests. Within the year of the crime being discovered, one of the leading investigations, Lieutenant Guy LePont, of the Quebec police, told reporters

that they were well on their way to busting the case wide open, saying they were basically inside guys. like Dave suggested. The leader wasn't with the Federation, but he had access to the warehouse that would not attract any suspicion. The leader, LePont spoke of, was Avic Caron.

This wasn't a heist that Coron went searching for, though. Rather, it landed right on his doorstep when in 2011 the FPAC rented a warehouse co-owned by his wife. That warehouse was the one at St. Louis de Blopin. Man, it feels like I'm saying a French word there. It would make my dreams come true if I'm anywhere near it. I like our reporter Graham Hamilton from the National Post put it.

He said it was as if he had been handed the keys to a bank vault. Karen almost immediately began looking for black market buyer who could convert the syrup-filled barrels into cash in his pocket. And what's this dude's name? F-Pack. No, F-Pack's the... Sorry, yeah, that's it bad. It's just hard to follow when you're saying these French names and you're like,

Sorry, was that a word? Because he's saying them so perfectly. What's the... Avic Karon. Avic. Avic. A V-I-K. And you mentioned a pocket at the end there. Perhaps a pocket in his pants.

Perkins, you've done it again. I don't need to go on. I don't know what's wrong. That's how he started early on. He just took a pocket full down to the pub. Hey? Hey? Put your hand in my right pocket.

You will not be disappointed this time. It's pure. These times. It's pure. I give it to you for a buck. All of that for a buck. A pint of beer. Soon after F-PAC started filling the warehouse with syrup back in 2011,

a friend introduced Carol to Richard Valier. I don't have no idea how to pronounce that. A man who made his money buying and selling syrup, often bending the rules and getting around the Federation system. This sort of role was known as being a barrel roller. Get out. Get out. He'd take it and he'll sort of like, almost like, rebadging it.

I'd love to see his LinkedIn profile. Barrel roller. Barrel roller. Beryl. Beryl. 209. What a guy. Oh yeah, that makes sense. Turn me off again. Did you, is it, what is it tonight?

I don't know. Have you had, like, pure maple syrup? Did you know this episode was coming out? Yeah. It's like you're buzzing. Yeah, I'm buzzing. I'm going to sit back here now. No, I'm going to sit back here now.

No, I'm not. I'm enjoying it, I'm sure. No, the listeners are not. I reckon, oh, I'm pretty sure some of them will be hating it, but some of them would be fucking loving it. And the ones who hate it will be the ones who get in contact. Hey, Jess, shut the fuck up. Like, right-o!

They're the vocal minority. During the autumn of 2011, a truck started arriving at the St. Louis de Blufford warehouse. One of these times we'll get that right, I reckon. It would load up barrels of syrup from the spring harvest. From there the barrels would be driven to Raymond Valeros sugar shack Have you heard of sugar shacks? I hadn't heard of a sugar shack What's a sugar shack?

Sugar shack is a small cabin where the sap is boiled down to make maple syrup Isn't that also what you call your balls, Dave? Sugar Shack, man, a sugar sack. Get a little to my sugar sack. Nah, it's shack, mate. Sugar shack. When the shacks are rocking. Leave my balls alone.

I got issues. Stop rocking them. Stop rocking them. I'm trying to sleep. I already closing my eyes really hard. I can't both close my eyes and settle my balls hard at the same time. It's one or the other. If my eyes are closed, the balls get bloody out of control.

It's a weird thing that I got. I didn't know that balls did that. Yeah. Well, God, I'm missing out. You sure are. You sure are. It's a curse. It's not a blessing, yes.

Double-edged sword. Sugar Shack. But is no one noticing that there's a truck that's rocking up and taking a lot of barrels away? Is the security cameras and stuff? Interesting. I'm going to talk about security in a little bit. So, you would have noticed

with my perfect pronunciation that Raymond and Richard share the same name, Raymond is Richard's father, the barreler's dad. So it's his sugar shack where they're taking the barrels to. And from there, at the sugar shack, that's where they'd empty the barrels, siphoning them out, basically like they were siphoning out petrol from a car. With their mouth.

We only have to get the flow going. Yeah. And then they'd fill them with water from a nearby creek before returning them to the warehouse. And what are they tipping them into that? They're tipping them into less sanitary vestibules. Like Coke bottles. No, there are other barrels. Toilets.

But apparently... That's really unsentery. One of the judges in a case was mentioning how they were not particularly food safe. So a toilet. And there was some talk that... I don't think a toilet, no, because that would... I mean, what would the point of that be, though? Flushing it down.

It's funny when Dave says it. That's interesting. No one would ever question it, though, would they? Would anyone ever question that? No one ever be like, oh, you keep... What's this brown goo in the toilet? Yeah, people... No one wants to ask that question.

No one does, trust me. What are you suggesting that they... They're flushing, like, you know what? Flush it and then somewhere down the sewer, the buyer is? The only sort of barren type thing that I'm associated with this is the beer barren episode of The Simpsons where Homo Bowling Balls full of liquor. Yeah. And I'm thinking that they're flushing toilets full of maple syrup to another location. They're putting toilets down toilets.

No, no, no, they're flushing maple syrup down the toilet. but the toilet is actually hooked up to an exclusive line. Oh, right. And it's pouring into Mose Bar. You have to make sure you're using the right toilet. That makes sense. You always have to full flush, because half a flush is not getting that gluggy liquid down.

That's an Australian thing, Dave, I believe. The half and full flush is an Australian invention, do you know it? Really? God, we've made some good things, haven't we? List them. Hills hoist. All right, done. Wi-Fi.

Vegeamite. When was the last time you saw a Hills Hoyst? It's the thing that people always name about Australia. Sheep. There's one in my apartment's backyard. All right. That's hard to argue against that. Paul Hogan.

Tax fraud. Allegedly. In some ways, this was a victimless crime. In other more accurate ways, it was a very victimful crime. They've stole tens of millions of dollars from someone. With thousands of law abiding. Syrup producers being the victims. I think that's my joke.

for the report. That was so good. I mean, Dave talked over, but that was... Matt, that joke was so funny. I actually really enjoyed it. Cutting all this out. It was so funny. You're so funny.

This is all on the floor. You're wasting everyone's time. Fuck. I'm in a weird place. Is this not fun for you? I'm having a great time. In the winter of 2011, 2012, the creek near Raymond's Sugar Shack froze over,

which meant a change of plans was required. Come on down to Raymond's Sugar Shack. We got all the... sugar you need. We got... Are you okay? I mean, you really have peted out there. Yeah.

Because I couldn't think of types of sugar. You got more sugar. Brown. We got... Sugar cane. Sexual sugar. What's the really fine one? Refined sugar.

No, it's an even finer one. So it's like a sugar. Brown sugar. We got sugar syrup. We got gummy bears. What's the type of sugar? I'm sorry, I keep going, I was going away now. I don't believe you.

Yeah, you've said that a few times. I know. So yeah, the creek there froze over, so they had to come up with another plan. Why? Because they couldn't wash out the barrels? They couldn't fill the barrels. That's where they were getting the water to fill the barrels. So they found another warehouse in Montreal, but the plan just kept on.

go on unhindered. It was just like, it sounds like there was never any suspicion. No one, no one care. Because, okay, you say it's worth more per barrel than oil, but this wouldn't happen in the oil industry. Yeah. You couldn't just drive in, fill up your truck full of barrels of oil and drive it to your own warehouse.

Yeah. Tip them out and fill them with water and take them back. Take them back. There'd be a couple of questions. Yeah. And you couldn't do this. How many barrels do they lose? Uh, thousands.

You couldn't do this hundreds of times. Yeah, over months and months. day after day. It's crazy. It's wild. This is so wild. And when are you going to get to that golden magical treasure? Artifact.

That will be later. Thank you. Good. But this is sort of what you've been alluding to. How do you picture the warehouse? Because when I'm thinking about it, like one of the main strategic stockpiles of this pure Canadian, like super important, supposedly super important, expensive syrup. What are you imagining?

I was sort of imagining like this Fort Knox kind of. Yeah. Yeah, like something would... Machine guns. I wouldn't say machine guns. I reckon like barbed wire fence, possibly like guards patrolling a little bit. I was imagining it in a big stable.

So we all went different ways there. You were closer, I think, Jess, because it turned out that they were pretty cheap on security F-Pack. During a later trial, Patrick Matured, one of the owners of the warehouse in Sun Louis de Blapon, testified that F-Pack had shown little to no concern for the security of the stockpile, saying that the warehouse had a fence locked with a padlock, the doors locked and a foreman who lived on the site,

but the Federation declined to pay for additional security. He went on to say that otherwise, as far as security goes, the Federation knew very well there wasn't any. It wasn't fortified. There were no security cameras or guards. How hell? Not even cameras. In many ways this did happen in the 1880s.

It's ridiculous. In a barn. That's what it feels like in some ways. And also the sugar shack. How many barrels can that fit? I'm imagining like nine. Well, yeah, I guess that's... Casting sugar.

Casting sugar. That's what I was going for. We've got casting sugar. Ray does his own ads. He's no good. Come on down to Raymond's Sugar Shack. got all your sugary needs. Remember, bulk discounts available if you mention the code word sugar daddy.

And as we always say here at Sugar Shack, Raymond, what's the catchphrase again? Sugar Baby, alright. Oh, Sugar Baby, alright. And Raymond only, he only got one take, didn't he? Yeah, he only needed one take, Dave. It wasn't that he only got, like, he booked the studio for an hour. It was a green screen. But he only needed the one.

So with no one, no security or anything, no one suspecting anything was up. They just became more and more brazen. Eventually they just drained the barrels directly in the warehouse. In the end, they just painted over the sign that just said, you know, ours now. Mine. They knocked on the foreman and said, hey, you're fired.

Okay. Get your stuff and get out. Actually, don't get your stuff. That's ours now. I've just spray pan of my name on it. Ows. That dog? Spray painted it.

It's ours dog. I don't think it can breathe. I killed your dog. Now you can have that. You can take care of that dead body. I don't want it. I don't want to look after a dead dog. Wheels, mate.

Get it out of here. According to court documents, of the 16,224 barrel stored, I only just found this out before. So if I said some other number earlier, this one's probably more accurate because I got this directly off

a Canadian law song. that Megan sent me a link to. Because she was my... She was my... Philips Seymour Hoffman. She was my Philip Seymour Hoffman. Oh, that took forever. Sorry, Megan.

What's the actual word? Tribute. Tribute. Jesus. This is just the tribute. So according to court documents, of the 16,224 barrels stored, 9,571 barrels were emptied.

9,000... That's over half. 571. What? That is insane. Which represented a total of 5,935,250 pounds of maple syrup. Whoa. Valued at approximately 17.8 million Canadian dollars.

Which I think is more, would be 20-something Australian. Do you think that's funny now, Vanity Fair? You pricking. Still having fun. Still pranking your brother? You dog. It's so fun. Yeah, it's a good prank.

He was having a bit of fun. Fun. So fun. I think he was an American writer. And he, you know, I think the American definitely... Different concept of fun. Their media was definitely looking at this as being all those quick little Canadians with their little funny crimes. Which I guess is what we're doing.

Sorry, everybody. We're as bad as Americans. No, I don't think that's right. I don't think that's right. What would be the equivalent in Australia of the maple syrup heist? Oh. The Hills Hoy's Heist. Oh, that's good.

Would it be like a dingo, dingo baby? No, that happened, and it was not that funny. Oh, I'm not saying the dingoes are heisting babies. I meant like it'd be like dingo's offspring. A pup. Yeah, but we don't really, that's not really an industry here, is it? What about just? Just Vegemite factory would be a veggie mite factory.

Imagine trying to siphon vegamite. Keep sucking. It is thick. I didn't like that sound. Oh, no, I don't like that. They call Vegemite black gold. They call it black oil, Texas tea. They call it black oil.

Black oil. As opposed to clear. I mean, that was my joke. Olive oil is clear. Oh, he's packing. Yeah, I've been stealing a bit of Vegemite from McDonald's myself. Where was that in his pants? I don't even, I've just pulled out a little type of Vegemite.

Do you think McDonald's around the world have Vegemite? Why were you at McDonald's without me? That question changed. in the middle. I know. When we fly to Sydney together, can I get hash browns at McDonald's at the airport? No, we're not plugging McDonald's. Yeah, this episode is brought to you by Movement Watchers, not McDonald's.

So from there, Valerre sold the stolen syrup to a man named Etienne Saint-Pierre. Nailed it. Or, like, if I was reading that out phonetically, it'd be Etienne Saint-Pierre. who rebranded it so that it appeared to be from New Brunswick rather than Quebec. So Quebec, in the Quebec world, that's like pretty tight. That's all F-Pack. New Brunswick, which is not far away. That's like, that's the free new world.

Oh, right, that's the anyone's going to. It's a little bit looser over there, but it's nowhere near as big of a market and stuff there. Raymond Villar, his son, Richard, and Etienne St. Piot, were all sent to trial. And that trial occurred only last year. Oh, wow. During the trial, St. Pierre told the jury, you can't prove what tree that syrup came from. Which seems like a dumb tactic to me.

He was pleading that he was mentally ill. He was saying it was not guilty, and he's going, he's like taunting them, basically. I would have said something like, surely you can prove that syrup I have is not the stolen syrup. I'm sure science could somehow prove that it's from New Brunswick not there. You know, you'd be playing. I'm not going,

I know you can't prove it. I know you can't. I dare you to find me guilty. I fucking dare you. I might be reading it in a different tone. I've killed before and I'll kill again. What's that sir? And I've also stolen my...

No, I haven't stolen maple cereal. I've just killed. Certainly not in this case. Don't look, I've stolen a lot of maple syrup, but not this particular thousands and thousands of pounds. No. I stole different thousands of pounds.

During the trial, Saint-Pierre also admitted that he wasn't a fan of F-Pack and that he resented their control of the market, suggesting they are like the mafia. I was hoping you're going to say that he said that he was not a fan of maple syrup, and because of that, I didn't do it. I didn't do it. Look, I'll try maple syrup. Yuck.

Oh, yuck. Get it out of my face. Yuck. Couldn't stand to be near it. I'm practically allergic. How could I steal 5,000 pounds of it? As if I'd siphon this. Oh, yuck.

But really, he said that he can't stand them and that they're... That's not looking good for him, though, is it? No, not really, no. Buying it from Valer meant he didn't have to go through the Federation. He despised so much. So this was, he was going to go on through a barrel roller. Sure. In court, Richard Valer admitted that he did fill the barrels with water,

but said he was forced to buy an armed man who apparently threatening, threateningly told him, I know where you live. And he did this over several months. I'll still know where you live. But to be honest, they formed quite a nice bond. They hung out, had a lot of lunch breaks together.

Yeah, it was quite nice. Like they'd chat about the footy and the weather weather happened. And then just every now and then be like, just by the way, I've still got that gum. Oh, no way you live, mainly because I pick you up for work every morning at 9 a.m. Thank you for always bringing a coffee out into the car with you for me.

That's very nice. Appreciate that. You've got access to sugar and I like it. Other than my favourite kind of excuses or alibis for something is... I did everything you're accusing me of. Obviously, you've got a lot of proof and I can't argue against that. I definitely did it. But I didn't want to.

A guy that I can't name or tell you anything more about said, I have to do it and yeah, I'm innocent. So, can I go home now? Is that enough? Sorry to have wasted your time. I wish I was guilty too. It doesn't seem that he was able to identify the man. And the story didn't wash with the jury as he was found guilty of the theft. Also fraud and trafficking stolen goods. His father, I'm going to start that again because I sort of re-said something that I already said.

Sorry, future Matt. Anyway, it seems like this story about the man with the gun, who, you know, allegedly exists as a real human. Apparently that didn't wash with the jury because he was, yeah. You seem shocked. My mouth is agape. Did you think my next paragraph was going to be all about the man with a gun and how he did it?

Do you know what I do? And how they tracked him down. I'd say, like, I don't know what he looks like, and I can't really describe his voice but I remember what he smells like so very syrupy do you want me to describe that to you

in great detail he spells like Lynx Africa so just find anybody yeah who uses that body spray and um oh no the lead suspect is a 13 year old boy in gym oh no

oh oh miss look at him he's got syrup all over him he's sticky. You've got sticky fingers. Oh, that's just being a teenage boy. Ooh. I just meant because they're messy.

When they eat their lunch, Dave. Come on. I think that's what we all meant, Dave. What were you meaning? Yeah, lunch. So, so sticky. His father, Raymond, was also found...

So, did I mention that he was found guilty of the theft, fraud and trafficking? That was... I love that the jury took him up on his dare. I dare you. And then they found him guilty. He went, that backfired. Yeah, all right. Not well played.

I double did you. I did ask for that. His father, Raymond, was also found guilty, him on possession of stolen goods and of fraud with the intention to traffic. And Saint-Pierre was found guilty of fraud and trafficking stolen goods. The guilty verdicts were handed down just last year, like I said, when the trial happened. But only a few months ago, the sentencing occurred. And this is, as it was reported in the Canadian press, this is how the same.

Sentences went down. Superior Court Justice, Raymond Pronovans, sentenced Richard Valles to eight years in prison. It does sound a bit like you don't have permission to say their names, so you're sort of redacting them as you say it, but really you're just losing confidence. So eight years. Eight years also confiscated $606,000 from him

and find him a further $9.4 million. Oh, jeez. I'd be fine. Big fine in the end there. So he was convicted of the theft for receiving solid goods will have to pay back the money over a 10 year period or risk having his sentence increased by six years. So he's got to pay 900 grand a year whilst living in prison, making no money.

Yeah, I don't know. I don't quite have... Or is it like they're like, he's sold, he's made so much money from these crimes. He's just got it, and it's just accruing interest in his account. I'm assuming that's not the case. Yeah, I don't know. How do you come across? $900,000 a year.

It's like, so it's like, be rich, and you don't have to be in jail for another six years. He's like, well, if I was rich, I wouldn't have done this crime in the first place. What happened to democracy in Canada? It used to be a beacon. The other two men, Raymond Villal and Etienne Saint-Pierre were each sentenced to jail terms of two years, minus one day for some reason, to be served in the community, as well as, three years probation. Raymond, Valia... That's not a sentence at all.

...will be required to pay $9,840 within one year or go to jail for six months, while Saint-Pier must pay $1.3 million over 15 years or be in prison for five years. It seems like such a weird... It all seems so random. And I love how you will be punished and go to jail amongst society and live in society. That's not a... You naughty, naughty. Pouty boy.

Also, one of you pays nine grand. One of you pays nine million. Work it out amongst yourselves. Either or. Draw straws. Oh, shit. The one of the key characters who we talked about right up the top

I haven't mentioned for a little while. What do you think happened in? Caron. The man who allegedly kicked it all off. Oh. He pleaded, unlike the others, he pleaded guilty. And the presiding judge,

Jacques La Croixielle, noted that the court regards, this is what the judge said, the court regards this matter as the perfect illustration of the Maxim Opportunity Makes the Thief, highlighting how none of it may have happened

if the F-Pack hadn't rented his wife's warehouse, basically. All of this happened because of the opportunity. Opportunity makes a thief. I've never even heard that, Maxim. I like that. No, it does sound a little bit like,

like, an excuse that doesn't really hold up. It's like, well, you've never even if you went to that bank that day, you may not have held it up with a gun. So, anyway, we all would have done it. Yep. We all were out of my hands. It's the bank's fault for existing. Yeah. Judge Jacques went on to sentence Karon harshly, despite his guilty plea, calling him the instigator of the heist and handing down a five-year prison term and a $1.2 million fine.

On hearing his punishment, Karon exploded with anger, yelling that he had been misled. by his lawyer into pleading guilty, he swore at the judge, banged on a wall, and wrestled with a guard who tried to restrain him. Good, good. Yes. That's how you get him.

I really like, I really like the image, because it's just like, he's, like, pleaded guilty. He's been told by his lawyer, if you plead guilty, you'll get, you know. So it's like, yes, Sean,

I'm guilty. I'm very sorry, and I throw myself with the mercy of the court. Great. Well, that's five years in prison and $1.2 million charge. You fucking what? You dog!

banging on a wall sir please stop banging on the wall they're so polite in Canada please sir please that was some great acting Matt I believed that no I was there I was in it you're a method actor so that's it that's the that's the story it's still the um a lot of those guys are

appealing the ones that didn't call he they're very appealing caron caron was like it's real good stuff Caron was like, apparently he was like going, I wouldn't have played a guilty. I was misled. And he's like, give me a trial.

I want this to go to trial. And judge is like, no, it's too late, mate. And that's why he's like, fucking Jesus. Anyway. Well, I think. Just have they found the man that was holding them at gunpoint for forcing them over several months to steal millions of dollars of not oil but syrup? As far as I know, they haven't. But I think this is the kind of, this is a topic that is going to be.

ongoing. I think it's actually it's been the rights of the story have been bought for a movie. Great. Nicholas Cage is set to cast

No, it's actually Jason Segal. Liam Hedensworth. Jason Segal. Really? Mm. So I get, which makes it sound like

I must be more of a comedy. Maybe they'll get a romantic angle in there. He can do serious. Which is interesting because he was off the Muppets and we talked about the Muppets last week. I love Jason Seagel. I think I was imagining Jason Bateman this whole time There you go

But yeah so there it is If you'd like to Matt read out the description of the man with a gun Maybe we could circulate that to our Canadian listeners And they can be on the lookout for him But more importantly what did he smell like? Link's Africa So it'll be on the lookout for a man with a gun that smells like lynx Africa And police call the Canadian Mounties

So it seemed like such a bizarre crime right And the way people were talking about it early before I found out how it all went down. I'm like, wow, this is going to be fascinated. But in the end, it's really more of a, less of a story about, like, an excitement or anything, more about just, like, bad security and painstaking work, sucking out maple syrup. Such bad security. Yeah, they just had to put in some cameras and check them sporadically,

and they would have found out what was going on. You know what they have really good security, though? At Raymond's Sugar Shack. We got CCTV. Yeah, there's a man with... The man with a gun inside the shack telling people to fill barrels for the oil. Syrup. I keep thinking of oil because that's actually a valuable liquid.

After I was well into the research and the report, I found out that it's actually not the only maple syrup house that's ever happened over there. There's actually been a few different ones. I'm hoping I picked the right one. This is the largest one. But there was another noteworthy one. Was it one in 1880, like I imagined? I imagine the early ones were 1880.

There was one in 2006, where thieves took around $1.3 million of syrup from the stockpile also, or one of the different stockpiles. One that was in dispute, actually. So that was five years earlier, and they still didn't put cameras up. But this was from, I think it was from a different source. But apparently, according to Lieutenant LePont, that investigation remains open. So that's a mystery, maybe a future mystery episode. No mystery to this one.

Unless those appeals are successful, then maybe that man with the gun thing is, that definitely is a mystery if that's real. Yeah, but it feels like bullshit. I mean, you know, I like to believe in the man with a gun. I dare you to know. Who knows where you live.

I dare you to find him guilty. You're guilty, mate. Stop banging on. Please, sir, stop banging on the wall. I will not Oh that's the report Thanks for having me I'll see you later

Bloody good stuff Canada Great job Maddie Sorry about the hyper Sorry No that's fine It's like you've crashed a lot over there Yeah Can you tell me what you took or

Not on air We need to keep the airways clear And that sort of stuff If you wouldn't mind Roll you on your side Yeah Don't let me be alone But I'm so lonely

Well, we'd like to dedicate that episode to the entire country of Canada And also thank our Canadian listeners But we also like to think Especially Megan who suggested the time Thanks Megan or Megan, do they say Megan in Canada Oh, maybe they say Megan, Megan Elizabeth Thanks Megan But we also like to thank everyone that supports the show over at Patreon

Patreon.com slash do go on pod Is where you get all your do go on extra needs By donating to our show You get bonus episodes a little newsletter from Match and shoutouts on the show which we would like to do now to thank a couple of people each.

You want to kick us off, Boppa? Oh, I would love to. And I would like to thank someone that I feel like I've mentioned before because I think they suggested a topic because you don't forget a name like P-Basta. P-Basta, that's a great name. It's honestly one of the names that's... Mr. P-Basta.

It just sticks in my head that name. Mr. Rovalova. From New York. New York. New York. New York. I'm walking here. God, we're awful.

Is that New York? Yeah, but I was told over the weekend that that line was improvised. Wow, that's great. It's a great line. From Back to the Future, too? Mm-hmm. What? I'm walking here.

And the other person I would also like to thank, other than Pee Baster, I would also really like to thank from Corby in the UK. Dean buzzard How good is that name? I was going to say it sounds like a type of bird It sounds like a type of bird But a dean buzzard It sounds like a specific type of bird

Like a species of a buzzet Yeah look at that Dean buzzard Yeah that's cool Ah the African Dean buzzard Very good Thank you Dean Buzzard Thank you Dean and thank you Pete Basta Well from a couple of great names

To another couple of great names If I will I'd like to thank all the way From Nashville Tennessee Nashville Nashville Tennessee listener, Jessica

Frallen. Jessica is a fantastic name. It definitely is, and so is frallin or fraylan, if you would like to pronounce it that way, Jessica. Thank you so much for all your support over in Tennessee. Is that anywhere, Neil Knoxville, Tennessee,

home of the Whigsphere on the Simpsons? The Sunsphere from the World Expo, 1988 88, I believe, was the... Knoxville, Tennessee. And I'd also like to thank back home of could from Belmont in Western Australia, Annette McTaggett.

Thank you, Annette. It is your time to shine on the airwaves here. Oh, so good. Belmont, W.A. We'd love to visit that. We'd love to tour more of Australia. Yeah, a few people have been asking about coming over to W.A. recently. I said to them that I'm going to be, I'm looking to go there back for Perth, Fringe.

You should come to. Fringe World. Possibly. Yes, early next year, January, February time. and maybe we'll see you there in that Mick Tegger. I'm not sure if Belmont is anywhere. Is that... But W.A. is...

It's honestly... Belmont. Yeah, W.A. tiny. Belmont. It's so small. I mean, it's only about the size of... But Europe. It's just Europe.

What's Europe? Speck of dust. Nothing can bear to Asia. Fleeting through there. Speg of dust. They were saying... Spegand dust. Belmont's just on...

It's just near the Perth airport. It's a suburb of Perth. That's what I was trying to tell you, man. There's a good guy. Those story in Bellwine. Annette, we'll see you there. We'll see you there. Yeah, Annette, that's great.

Hey, Annette, you keep doing you. Yeah. Don't reckon Jess? I could not reckon harder. I'd love to, if you guys, if we've got a moment, I'd love to thank. No, we're done. You're out of time. You're out of touch.

I'm out of time. I'd love to thank a name that I'm not going to be able to pronounce. But you're going to give it a bloody Red Hot go? Let me have a crack. I'd really love to thank. And I'm such a big fan of our patrons. Obviously help this show kick on and keep being made and etc. Audrey Chmelsky.

It could be... I want to... C-H-M-I-E-L-E-W-S-K-I. Audrey Kimlowski. Audrey, I think you are very used to your surname being mispronial mispronounced. I'm sorry to have added to that. But, thank you. Sick name.

For supporting the show. And then it's a great name. Beautiful first name to. Audrey. Good fan of that name. Gorgeous. Big fan. She is a little bit more secretive though. I have no idea where in the world she's from. Let's guess. Where do you reckon? Cape Town. West Philadelphia. I'm betting she's from Melbourne. She's got a real Melbourne vibe about it. Okay. I think she likes her Chilate and a vintage bookstore.

Is that what we're about? That's what we're all about. That's what I'm about. And I'm very Melbourne. I hate myself so much. Don't worry. The people out there do too, too. And they'll let me know.

Hey, you know who doesn't hate you? Yep. Mr. Peabaster. Mr. Peabaster. I'd also love to thank maybe almost our most frequent Twitter correspondent, Kathy Grible. Kathy. From Maryville.

Kathy. As they say over in Maryville. Maryville. How do they print? It's different. You're thinking of Maryland. Maryland. So Maryville might be how they say it.

Or, but if it's like Maryland, it would be Merrillville. I don't think it's Mariville. No, it's Maryville. Maryville. Maryville. Thank you, Kathy. The other day, Kathy said I'm her spirit animal. But you know what, Kathy?

I'm a person. Is Kathy the one that we disappointed by saying that we don't watch Game of Thrones? Yeah. Sorry, Kathy. No, she wasn't disappointed. She was the opposite of disappointed. She said, thank God. Didn't she?

Yeah. Oh, she was stoked that we didn't. And I'm, thank you for, I mean, I'm happy to be a spirit animal, but I'm both a physical being and a human. So it's very difficult for me to do. But I will do it for you if that's what you need. That's what she needs, mate, do it for. Then that's, I'll bloody do it.

That's all she's asking. I know, and I'm saying I'll do it for Kathy. Kathy with a K. Anyway. Maryville, which is in Tennessee as well. Hey. Double Tennessee episode. That is real cool.

I wonder if... I wonder if it's anywhere near the wig shop. No, stop. Knoxville. Cool. Thanks so much everyone for listening and thanks for my report

being so good again. Don't thank yourself for that. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know if I nailed it. It felt... No, it's fun. I felt so excited about the idea of it and I don't know if I fully

gave it everything that deserved. You did great. You did so well. Would you like to thank either of us for any particular type of behaviour that has occurred throughout the show? Thanks, Dave. You've been very sensible today. Hey, thanks. I often get thanked for my sensible behaviour.

And thanks Jess for being a fucking loose unit. You mad dog. Now let's all close our eyes really hard. As we say, thank you so much for listening to the show. If you want to support the show, you can always do so at patreon.com. slash do go on pod. You can always get in contact with us on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter at do go on pod

and do go on pod at gmail.com if you're an email, kind of guy or gal. But all the links are in the description of this episode. But until next week, we will say thanks so much for listening. And by next week's episode, Jess and I will be one year older. Well, technically that's not true.

But anyway, we'll both be 27 years old. Until then, we will say thank you. And goodbye. Later. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network Visit planetbcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. I mean, if you want, it's up to you. Come on down to Raymond's Sugar Store for all your sweet needs.

We've now got a range of artificial sugars which is kind of against our ethos but it's what the people wanted. So I've got equal. I've got splendour. I've got etc. Come on there. Thanks, Raymond. You nailed in one take.

Amazing. Don't forget to sign up to our tour mailing list so we know where in the world you are and we can come and tell you when we're coming there. Wherever we go, we always hear six months later, oh, you should come to Manchester. We were just in Manchester. But this way you'll never miss out. And don't forget to sign up, go to our Instagram,

click our link tree. Very, very easy. It means we know to come to you and you'll also know that we're coming to you. Yeah, we'll come to you. You come to us. Very good. And we give you a spam-free guarantee.