Do Go On - 99 - WWII Badass - Charles Upham

Episode Date: September 13, 2017

We dip into the Golden Hat this week and talk about a New Zealander who was awarded the Victoria Cross not once, but TWICE! This guy might just be the baddest ass of all the badasses we have talked ab...out! Plus a lot of the usual silliness with Matt being very hyper and weird and Jess laughing for a solid minute because of a meme. Support the show and get rewards like bonus episodes: www.patreon.com/DoGoOnPodTwitter: @DoGoOnPodInstagram: @DoGoOnPodFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DoGoOnPod/Email us: dogoonpod@gmail.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey everybody, Jess and Dave, just jumping in really quickly at the top here to make sure that you are across all the details for our upcoming Christmas show. That's right, we are doing a live show in Melbourne Saturday December the 2nd, 2023, our final podcast of the year, our Christmas special. It's downstairs at Morris House, which usually be called the European beer cafe. On Saturday December the 2nd, 2023 at 4.30pm, come along, come one, come all, and get tickets at dogoonpod.com. Most weight loss programs are short-term fixes, but managing your weight needs a long-term solution,
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Starting point is 00:01:38 Visit PlanetBcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. Hello and welcome to another episode of Do Go On My Name is Dave Warnakie and I'm here as always. Well, actually not as always, she wasn't here last week but it's Jess Perkins and as always he's on every episode Matt Stewart. And he holds it over, doesn't he? Yeah, we're talking about how this is episode 99, the 100th live show is coming up but for us it's actually not 100. Matt, it is. Yeah, I'm the only one who can genuinely enjoy the hundredth. What are you up to Jess? What? 36.
Starting point is 00:02:30 It's good to see you again for the first time in months, what it feels like. Dave. I've been here, I've, I took a two week sabbatical. He took one. I took two. I think I've missed the most. I'm sorry about that. Have you, I reckon you've both missed two.
Starting point is 00:02:46 No. Oh yeah, maybe that's right. Yeah, you're right actually. Oh yeah, I'm alright. Yeah, yeah. I'm thinking about all the times I've been away, but we were, we still released episodes. I forgot that. You did, you buddy did.
Starting point is 00:02:58 No, I'm a bit of a goose. Yeah, thanks for getting me so in to keep my seat warm. It was real good. He was great with the Moth Man, that big old Paula Duss, they call the Mothman. He's great that Nick Mason. And we would like to apologize to the good people of the United States of America, who apparently take Mothman more seriously than we did on the episode last week. Really sorry about that America.
Starting point is 00:03:19 Sorry. God bless you all. And I also found one of the names that I forgot to thank a man named Damn Wags he was actually a guy at The Sydney live show who put mothman in my and the front of my mind and then I entirely forgot to thank him when the mothman incident Because there was a mothman incident where they took the mothman You know like it it, it cryptoided into the hat and it took out the names that said Mothman on it.
Starting point is 00:03:50 Right, okay. You haven't listened the episodes and none of that makes sense because it does otherwise. Why would I listen if I'm not on it? That's a very good point. I only listened to his podcast to listen to these. What's with tone? These ones. These ones.
Starting point is 00:04:04 These ones. No, these ones. Gotets we don't these ones these ones got a no these ones I've got the golden tonsils those ones yeah out of mat that's always impressive funny stuff thank you they've made me laugh once last week as well you guys are on a hot street. Wow, we've made him laugh twice in a month. I only took us 98 and 99 episodes. No, I laugh occasionally. I laugh occasionally. There's some life left in you, isn't there?
Starting point is 00:04:32 Yeah, and there's old sack of bones. It's not, that's not going to say sack of shit. And then remembered the phrase as bag of bones. But I'd already said anyway, you don't need to know everything about it. This old bag of bones, alright, cut that in, thank you. We are very excited that this weekend, Saturday afternoon, we're doing our 100th live, well, at first, we are doing our 100th episode live at the European beer cafe,
Starting point is 00:05:01 here in Melbourne, we have sold out the show already, which is really exciting, but just don't forget to come. I love cafes. I love beer, and I love euros, the currency. So this is really good. You're going to be a cafe, got it? Yeah, they will make you pay in euros, so. Which is weird, but you know. And another thing that we'll have, that we didn't announce before the Sydney show, but we'll pre-worn people for the Melbourne show, is that we have T-shirts.
Starting point is 00:05:27 We have T-shirts that you can purchase. And Ristis. We do have Ristis and we'll give them away. Yeah, we give away Ristis with the T-shirt. If you buy a T-shirt, you get one Ristie. Yeah. You don't have to take it now. And you don't get to choose who gives it to you.
Starting point is 00:05:40 It's just whoever's manning the store at the time. Anyway. So, yeah, that's just a little note for anyone coming to Melbourne. It's gonna be really fun I'm not a little note by RISTI we mean wristband Yeah, probably good to clarify. We should just we have to go on wristbands and they finally RISTI doesn't mean RISTI outside of Australia Anyway, so no one's getting the sick joke like a hand job. We get it like a RISTI Wow was confused. Yeah like an upward motion on a Like a wristy, like a cage. Wow, I was confused. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:06 Like an upward motion on a, on a, on a willy. Up, only up. I was thinking you keep going up. I like it. Forever. It's like an opposite of milk and a cow. No, no, no, I just imagine it's so long that just goes up forever. Wow.
Starting point is 00:06:21 That is a big old willy. Wow, that's a, that's a big old willy. Wow, that's a, that's a RISTY for you. Yeah, yeah, that's a RISTY. Yeah, so that's RISTY's, um, next topic. Speaking of next topic, it is Jess Perkins report to, I'm not having a good mouth today. It is a speaking of topics. It is Jess Perkins turn to report
Starting point is 00:06:47 on a topic. Sure is buddy. With no offense to me so at all. At the fifth beat of our podcast. It is so good to have you back, Jess Perkins. It's great to see your shining face. It was really not expected when you started talking. I was going to be like, I know he's better than me. We all wish I was dead. I know I get it I Was not expecting that and I'm getting a little tricked up now It's good to be back. I missed you boys. We missed you too, but you know what I mean. I was up in Sydney I was up in Sydney and you know Sean beg you're up in I was up in Sydney
Starting point is 00:07:27 Sean beg you know what's nice about Sydney weather the beautiful harbor the weather you leave the house and The sun is out and then you the middle of the day Sun still at end of the day Well, it goes away, but it's been up the whole time Yeah the day well it goes away but it's been up the whole time. Yeah it doesn't rain in sunny then rains and it's fucking snowing Melbourne I fucking love Melbourne so much but the weather sucks balls and not in a fun way. Wow I'm not in an upwards motion. No upwards motion. Anyway so yeah I was enjoying the Sydney weather. Sydney's here they do weather real real good. I had a bloody great time in
Starting point is 00:08:05 Sydney. I'm looking forward to going back there. Yeah, it's a great place. Great place. Maybe in November. Who knows? Maybe. Sizzle. Anyone working at the Sydney airport? Maybe you might see me through them bloody ills there. And Dave got to witness firsthand that I always get picked for the random bomb test. Oh, okay, we got... Random explosives tests. Random bomb tests. They were in the bomb house.
Starting point is 00:08:36 The random bomb house. That's anyone made bumhouse.com yet? So no, Jess, I did witness it firsthand. You said going, we're going into the security section of the airport to go through to the terminal and, well, through to the gate. And Jess says to me, I always get checked. But people always say they get checked. We went through it. She got checked. You look so innocent that you must be guilty. Yeah, that must be it.
Starting point is 00:08:59 Now I reckon people just wanted to talk to you. Is this an excuse to have a chat? Oh, that's nice. I don't really chat to a match. Yeah, they've fucking, they, you know, serve them right. I'm off the clock. Mate, if you need a chat, don't go to someone like Bob. Just, just, just goes, this again. I am off the podcast. I am very cold. I will not talk to you.
Starting point is 00:09:24 I'm very cold. I will not talk to you very In fact on the podcast I see colder than Melbourne Yeah, fucking wouldn't know anyway. It is my turn to report and I have um will actually last week was your turn to report Yep, um this is You are laying it on sick look um the Mothman report suffered Um it was brought forward a week and I'm looking to offload any blame of it not being the best episode and it was the best episode. That's a weird, that's all redundant. So you're blaming me, but it would have been even more
Starting point is 00:09:59 the best episode. Exactly. If I had an extra week. You generally do the reports the day of, so I don't know what the extra week would have done. Well, I would have been more relaxed leading into it. I would have been a week off. And then I would have been really bloody fresh and I would have really attacked it with vigor. And I wouldn't have been doing it in a weird motel. I would have been in a Melbourne suburb.
Starting point is 00:10:24 Well you got to listen to the episode because we explained anyway. Um, why I'll listen to the episode. Anyway, don't expect me to just talk to you about my life. God no, I've got a divorce. I got married. Since we last spoke and I also got divorced and that's why I'm now living in a CD motel. Thank you. What's happened? Are you alright?
Starting point is 00:10:44 No, my life's falling apart. Okay. I'm so she's your wife God don't bring her up again. Come stay with me if you need or hey rather than no, yeah, the most I was fine Do you have cable television? Dave has a spare room. Don't you? Dave? No He does I I'm sorry, Dave. That's great. Oh, that's so good. Dave, I'm moving in. Oh, great.
Starting point is 00:11:10 We can be the original odd couple. Sit, calm. We're government wall of it. They podcast together. They live together. Yes, let's pitch this. They shower together. It's the strangest part of their day.
Starting point is 00:11:22 What do they do it? They both hate it. Saving water. What do they do it? They both hate it. Save and water. Stop making me do it Matt. I want to wash alone. Rub my back. That's you to me. Beating in the boy. Coming to channel 9 this spring.
Starting point is 00:11:40 Ooh, this summer, I mean the fuck. The season that we're in, you may? The season that we're in. We're about to be. It's not bloody spring and bloody melbertoyle that you're brought to your boy. It is springtime. No, it's fucking cold. Anyway.
Starting point is 00:11:56 Spring is sprung. It's been 10 minutes. Let's get into the report. I'm very sorry. Okay. I've dipped into the golden hat this week, boy. Oh. It's a golden hat from Stuart Alcock.
Starting point is 00:12:09 Thank you very much, Stuart. It's very exciting, and I will ask you this question, boys, which I've written. I've written the question. Wow, that's respect for you, Stuart. It's at the top of my page, and it's highlighted in bold, because I'm a professional. My question is, what is the highest military honor a person can receive? Oh, I know this one. Oh, Brigadier Major.
Starting point is 00:12:31 It's got a bit of a Brigadier. Brigadier. Is it, it's a firm pad on the back. Yeah, they give you a firm pad. A lot of job well done. Which arm will we be talking about? If we're talking about the English army, I reckon it's a little nod. It's just like a, a knowing wink. I think that's about as good as you did your job. Yeah
Starting point is 00:12:51 The knowledge in yourself that you did you from in the old's yummy. It's a bloody cold tinny a bee And then in the American army. It's a bloody You know, like those big cannons they shoot them over your head and there's like a million people standing around watching and everyone says God bless you sir and then they play anywhere you want it that's the way you need it anywhere you want I'm sorry yes sir! yeah that's you're correct and that's what my report is on. 12 consorts salute. If it's in the North Korean army, your name is Kim Jong Un.
Starting point is 00:13:31 Mm-hmm. That's the highest order. Kim Il-san. Mm-hmm. The father. Founding father. Founding father. Okay, in the other, in the other.
Starting point is 00:13:38 He's one of the founders. Countries, military, honors, you can think of. I'm going through all the big ones. I've included a New Zealand. It means you get to use a gun for a week. Oh, a week. You get to use the gun. The gun, yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:51 I said, I got to use the gun. We've got one. You get to use the gun. Very peaceful nation. The gun actually shoots love. Wow. You get to use the love gun. Oh, and you just stroke up.
Starting point is 00:14:03 Oh, forever up. Canada's similar. You get to use their love gun on a moose. Ah! Why? I know, they're already on a moose. Why haven't they? Your moose gets to ride a moose.
Starting point is 00:14:18 Oh, that's living. With the love gun. Why? He grew up. He died. With the love gun to cure war. Cue up to end war. War is a disease.
Starting point is 00:14:32 War is a disease. It is. We need a cure now. We need a cure now. Rub it and rub it smith again. That's two weeks in a row. We've done rub it smith again. Love cats.
Starting point is 00:14:43 They've gun street love cats. M cats. These guns she love cats. Mow. And they wear our own. Mow. Jam and Mow. Oh. What was the question again? Have we got it yet?
Starting point is 00:14:57 No. It's got to be. Do you love cat again? Mow. I like it. We got to get a gift of that face. I imagine it would be real gross to look at. I fucking love it.
Starting point is 00:15:12 Wow, we have the opposite reactions. I've fallen in love with that look. Was that your love gun? Yeah, that was my love cat gun. It worked. He's not firing black. It's really winks. It's so creepy. Yeah, I'm mad. I would not want to be looking at that. That's a powerful gun It's a powerful gun use it wisely
Starting point is 00:15:37 But if we were to get back on to the top of the highest military honor have we got it It's got a bit I think you know this as well. Do you know this? The ones that are coming to my head, a purple heart, which I can't remember with them. I think that's a brave thing in Victorian cross. Victoria Cross is the top one in the UK. And Victoria Cross is correct.
Starting point is 00:15:58 Yeah. So Victoria Cross is the highest award of the United Kingdom. On the United Cat. You can know the cat. And that's the one that Victoria Cross is the highest award of the United Kingdom Justice. The United Kingdom Justice. The United Cat. And that's one that Victoria Cross and it's originally made out of that cannon. Ah! Yes.
Starting point is 00:16:14 From Star Wars film cannon. Yeah, it's a lot. Yeah. The official stuff, they crush it up and then they make it cross. Let's make a crush in it. It's giving it a crush. It's all good. Little pestle and mortar.
Starting point is 00:16:30 As a can, can I take them from Russia, from like the charge of the light brigade or something like that? Something like that. Yes. She's got knowledge. She's got knowledge. Do you know what the VC is awarded for? It's usually, you've got, got usually have to die to get it. I'm gonna say above and beyond bravery. Basically, so it's awarded for gallantry in the face of the enemy.
Starting point is 00:16:53 I think most people that get it die. Is gallantry the one where you open a door for a lady? Well, the majority people that get it have died in it. Every single person who's been awarded the VC has or will die because we all die. You've got knowledge dripping at your ears. We all die, Maddie. You hopefully soon. Well, let him get the cross first. So, um, yeah, so it's gallantry in the face of the enemy. So it used to be they were get right up in that group. They added it in the face of the enemy. So it used to be they would get right up in that group I added it in the face of the enemy
Starting point is 00:17:27 So it's not like your miles away from the action, but you've been very brave like this guy has not cried at all today I sent a real strongly worded email to Hitler Stop it Stop what you're doing. I don't care what you say. I don't care If you ostracize me from our social group because I know you and my wife are very tight. I don't even care what happens. Hitler? Stop it. Scent. No. Scent. Thank you. All my love.
Starting point is 00:18:01 I'm mad. Oh no, that was my email signature. I should have changed it. Oh no, I replied all. Well the whole Nazi army got it. Garbys and everyone. Now they've got Hitler's email. God, he'll be upset by that. He is going to be real pissed.
Starting point is 00:18:20 Stop it. I like the gesturing you were doing there too. Stop it. That's a very firm index finger. Stop it. That's a very firm index finger. Stop it. Ah, do all of that. Ah! So this is about the Victoria Cross. It is about the Victoria Cross. It's about the very specific Victoria Cross winner or recipient maybe I should say. No winner. They won. They won. I fucking got it! Anyway, that's the way you need it. Anyway, you want brown and no Victoria across. But I want to play that at the ceremony.
Starting point is 00:18:53 I want to talk about the Victoria cross a little bit in general first, because some people may not know all that much about it. So it's kind of nice to know what it is and why it's awarded to people so that you can get an idea of it. Oh, do you know the actual facts about that cannon thing? Sorry, I should have guessed. I read it, but I did not put it in my report, and now I'm regretting that. It is made from a cannon thing. Do you feel the need to look it up, don't you, Dave? No, yes.
Starting point is 00:19:20 Look it up while I do this part, okay? Perfect. Okay, great. So the Victoria Cross, it was previously awarded to Commonwealth countries, most of which have established their own honour systems now and no longer sort of acknowledged the British honour, but like Australia for example, has still has the Victorian Cross, but it's for Australia. It may be awarded to a person of any military rank in any service, and to civilians under military command, although no civilian has received the award since 1879.
Starting point is 00:19:50 So it is now mostly just people observing in the military. The V.C. was introduced on the 29th of January in 1856 by Queen Victoria to honour acts of valid during the Crimean War. Since then, the medal has been awarded to 1,358 times to 1,355 individual recipients so a few people have received it twice that is crazy And it's crazy because it's so is that oh because it's only for it's for one act So can you get it like in the same battle or is it more likely to
Starting point is 00:20:26 have happened across different times? It's not like when you get two speeding finds going down the same highway. It's not like that at all. Matt, you've got to take victories wherever you say them. I won two speeding finds. They said it couldn't be done. But I did it. I did 200 kilometers an hour in a school zone. I killed four kids. So they fined me twice.
Starting point is 00:20:58 That's beautiful. For every second child, they gave me a fine. And funnily enough, since it's not funnily enough, but just interestingly, since the Second World War, only 15 medals have been awarded. 11 to members of the British Army and four to the Australian Army. So since the Second World War, only 15. So that's not that metany in quite a long period of time. Yeah, I guess there's not been... No, there's been some pretty big wars, aren't I talking about that? There's some big wars. But, you know, we're just about to push this now. Or maybe they just, maybe they've...
Starting point is 00:21:32 They're making one, I used to. Well, what's all the same? Boys don't know that. They've blooded new brides. I tell you that for free. These people are... No, they definitely do. Yeah, they're good. Beginning, have you found it Dave? So the story is that the original metal for the original crosses comes from a Russian cannon
Starting point is 00:21:52 captured at the Siege of Sylvester Pole, which is part of the Crimean War, which is also where the charge of the Light Brigade got you. So vaguely on the right track there. I did actually read that the stuff that they make it from now, which may be the same thing, is like kept in a vault, and it has to, it's like really, really well protected. And it's just, yeah, just checking anyone's, will ever receive a Victoria Cross for protecting the metal.
Starting point is 00:22:17 Oh. That gets made into Victoria Crosses. Amazing. I'll be cool. Imagine that. Mm. You'd make a daytime movie out of that one, wouldn't you? I'm bloody.
Starting point is 00:22:26 You're bloody, what a bloody word. I'd watch that with a popcorn ready. That's what you want a daytime movie. I don't know. Now, you're doing the vacuuming usually. You're vacuuming, I'd just a little bit of someone in the background, daytime movie. Just Elvis trying to act.
Starting point is 00:22:41 Do I always want to act? He's in Hawaii, or he's it riding a motorcycle around inside a dome in Hawaiian Island? Anyway, so beginning with the Centennial of Confederation in 1967, Canada, followed in 1975 by Australian New Zealand, developed their own national honor system, separate and independent of the British or Imperial honor system. So as each country system evolved, operational gallantry awards were developed. So the VC for Australia, we have our own sort of VC now. So it's now called the VTRA across Australia, some of that.
Starting point is 00:23:19 VC for Australia, and the Canadian VC, and the VC for New Zealand. So VC for Australia, VC for New Zealand, Canada VC. Come on Canada. Canada there, there's some of them, they like change the things around like I always thought it was weird when like on the Marty Ducks it was Team USA. I'm like, surely it's the USA team. Team USA. That makes the sounds better. Well, you grew up in a different generation, a different era, you know. You grew up post-mighty ducks. I grew up on the tough streets, pre-mighty ducks.
Starting point is 00:23:54 You grew up in the gold rush. Well, that's pre-mighty ducks. Well, there was a melee west of us, but while he was still like on his way up in the hockey world, before he... Well, I can't remember his trouble, ended up having a drive a limousine for some reason and look after these troublesome kids on the ice. There's no shame in driving a limo.
Starting point is 00:24:13 They were a rag-tag band. There was no way they were gonna ever play hockey at a high level, let alone be team USA, the USA team. No, you're right. The USA team sounds ridiculous. I don't know. It's like saying USA team. No you're right. The USA team sounds ridiculous. I don't know. It's like saying Australia child me was an idiot. Australia team. Team Australia. The Australian team. I don't. Sportswoman of the year. Can I go on? Thank you. Before the Crimean War there was no official standardized system for recognising,
Starting point is 00:24:48 for recognition of gallantry within the British Armed Forces. There's a growing feeling among the public and the Royal Court that a new award was needed to recognise incidents of gallantry. I just like saying gallantry a lot too. Queen Victoria had instructed the war office to strike a new metal that would not recognize metal, new metal that would not recognize birth or class. So previously you had to be like a certain rank to get any kind of awards, but now she's like no, if you just do something pretty bad I'll see you get a little award.
Starting point is 00:25:19 It was meant to be a simple decoration that would be highly prized and eagerly sought after by those in the military services. To maintain its simplicity, Queen Victoria, under the guidance of Prince Albert, vetoed the suggestion that the award be called the Military Order of Victoria, and instead suggested the name Victoria Cross. The original warrant... Which is how she felt at other people trying to tell her what to call her award. Victoria Cross. Oh my my god she's angry. We could call her Victoria Cross. Victoria, happy. Victoria, hungry. You're not you when you're hungry. Victoria need nappy change. Albert. The original warrant stated that the Victoria Cross would only be awarded to soldiers who have served in the presence of the enemy and had performed some signal act of valor or devotion.
Starting point is 00:26:11 The first ceremony was held on the 26th of June in 1857, which Victoria, Equin Victoria invested 62 of the 111 Crimean recipients in a ceremony in Hyde Park in London. Now there's a signal. So, what the other 50 did didn't get a bit of time with the Queen. They didn't get any time with the Queen. Maybe some of them as you had suggested. Oh actually. Word.
Starting point is 00:26:34 Dude. Oh dear. Others maybe had something on that day. Right. Like they're in funeral. You'd probably go. If you're honest you'd probably go. Come meet the queen. I've got soccer. I've got to play Emilio Estevez in a game of hockey.
Starting point is 00:26:49 Yeah. You know what he's like. I know you guys probably would go meet the queen. You wouldn't meet the queen if you're given the opportunity? No, like depending on what was on that day. You got nothing on that day. Absolutely nothing. If I've got nothing on that day, am I feeling all right?
Starting point is 00:27:06 Yeah, you feel pretty good. Feeling tip top. Tip top. Hmm, why I don't have any plans? Because all of your friends are meeting the fucking queen. Oh, my, oh my friends are there. Yeah. Oh yeah, probably go wrong.
Starting point is 00:27:19 You sheep. You wouldn't meet the queen? My friends are there. Alright, I'm there. Yeah? You sheep. You want to meet the queen? I'm friends with you. Alright, I'm there. Yeah? I'm so there, but he bowed to her and... I can't do that. I can't do that. I get a selfie with a selfie stick.
Starting point is 00:27:35 I never even owned one of those. I buy one for the queen. I'd give her a love cat gun. I hate that so much. This is kind of interesting. He said love wrong. There's a single company of jewelers, Hancock's of London,
Starting point is 00:27:48 and they have been responsible for the production of every Victoria Cross awarded since its inception. That's cool. That's cool, right? That's cool. So, there should have everything else, but their Victoria crosses.
Starting point is 00:28:01 Well, I mean, they're the only ones who have ever done it, so I guess. but they've gone through Some dry patches of the last what six 60 years have made 17 They're like come on show some bloody go on true. Come on you guys big go on Go on learned as the highest award for Valor of the United Kingdom the Victoria Cross is always the first award to be presented at a Ceremony even before night woods. Yeah, I think Knights have to bow to someone with a Victoria Cross. Yeah, I think so, yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:29 It's like at ranks, nearly everything. Yeah, ranks everything. Owing to its status, the VC is always the first decoration worn in a row of medals, and it's the first set of post nominal letters used to indicate any decoration. So let's say you're like a, you know, like a match to it VC, OAM, mama, mama, mama, it's all VC, the worst thing. You're also being thrown in order of Australia. Yeah. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:28:51 You didn't put my BA though, didn't you? No, I did not put your BA in there because I figure you Victoria cross in your order of Australia probably go before your Bachelor of Arts. Interesting take. I'm saying VA goes first. Yeah, you're saying that. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:29:07 You're playing by the Queen's rules yet again. I'm just pointing out something that's kind of interesting. That's, no, that was interesting. Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. No, it's fine. I was just having a little muck about. Yeah, but I didn't mean. I mean, Matt, do you not get it? You don't muck about with the VC.
Starting point is 00:29:20 I'm sorry, get it. I'm sorry, I got it. Have a little respect. No, yeah, it's just made out of a cannon. Yeah, you got to respect it Bow to my cross bow to it. I've got one on one of the 17 one of the four Aussies What are you really offensive? I'm sorry. I think it is yeah similar acts of extreme valor that do not take place in the face of the enemy Are honored with the George Cross. So if you're really brave but there's no Nazis around, you can still get a George Cross. George Cross.
Starting point is 00:29:49 Just still pretty cool. That's why there's only been 17 awarded because there's less and less Nazis around. Yeah, there's less of them. Was George, what George's Victoria's son or something? There's a future king, right? No, I'm not great with them. With the monarchs. There's so many of them.
Starting point is 00:30:03 There's so many George's and Richards. You're like George Elizabeth's dad? Anyway, it doesn't matter. No, that was maybe Albert. Albert, but then he did change his name. He changed his name. His king name was George, wasn't it? Yes, his regnal name.
Starting point is 00:30:20 Regnal, love it. All right, sorry, Jess, I've really thrown the brakes on this sweet progress you're making. Please do go on. George Cross is really good. Still very good. Has... George Cross.
Starting point is 00:30:31 Equal precedence, but it's a war in second because the GC is newer, but it's still like, quite an honor. There's widespread thought. There's this belief that it's kind of the done thing like you were kind of mentioning Dave that all ranks would salute a bear of the victoria cross. There's no official requirement that appears and the official warrant for the VC or in any of the Queen's regulations and orders but
Starting point is 00:30:58 tradition does dictate that this occurs and as such the chief of staff will salute a private awarded a VC or GC. So anybody will salute a victor across from it. How fucking cool is that? That's very cool. The original Royal Warrant involved an expulsion clause that allowed for the recipients name to be erased from the official register in certain wholly discreditable circumstances and his pension would be cancelled. Eight were forfeited between 1861 and 1908, so they may have committed crimes or something like that.
Starting point is 00:31:30 But King George V felt very strongly that the decoration should never be forfeited and in a letter from his private secretary, Lord Stamford Ham, all the 26 good name in July of 1920, his views are expressed thusly. He doesn't say that away, baby, but I wanted to say thusly. The king feels so strongly that no matter the crime committed by anyone on whom the VC has
Starting point is 00:31:56 been conferred, the decoration should not be forfeited. Even where a VC to be sentenced to be hanged for murder, he should be allowed to wear his VC on the scaffold. Wow. He's saying doesn't matter what he's done post V.C. if he's been given that award and that honor, that's enough. And that's the Queen's grandfather there talking right. Now, three people have been awarded the V.C. and Bar, the Bar representing the second award of the Victoria Cross. Now they are Noel Chavassi and Arthur Martin Leak, who are both doctors in the Royal Army Medical Corps for rescuing wounded under fire, and New Zealander Charles Upham, who
Starting point is 00:32:36 was an infantry man for combat actions. He stuck it right up on. Upham remains the only combatant soldier to have received a V.C. and a Bar. So is a bar just like with honors type things. It's like even a wine. So instead of getting a second little medal, it's like, here's your V.C. and a knife. Is it all for one event though? No, separate. Oh wow, so you brave twice.
Starting point is 00:32:51 Brave twice. Yeah, this isn't too speedy to go some the hard way. No. So that's what you're thinking. Yeah, sorry, I was. And it's Charles Upham that was suggested by Stuart Alcock and that is who I am going to be thinking about on D-times today. I'm kind of glad because that was,
Starting point is 00:33:04 I'm kind of glad that I was doing this. I'm glad that I was. And it's Charles Oppam that was suggested by Stuart Alcock, and that is who I am going to be thinking about what he did today. I'm kind of glad because that was, I thought it was just going to be an hour of you going, all right, here is some more. Here is some fun facts about it. No, no, no, but I just wanted to give some context to what the award is.
Starting point is 00:33:18 Yeah, it's cool. I feel like a lot of people, particularly younger people, because it hasn't happened as much. You know, I'll sort of, in the last 20 years, say. Yeah, I always knew it was something that you have to greatly respect, but wasn't. Yeah, I had a feeling, I had it in my head as well that maybe I have to die to get it, but basically, you have to put yourself in the, but a lot of it take the chance that
Starting point is 00:33:39 you probably will die. Yeah, I just know that a lot of people are rewarded posthumously, especially in the first and second world war when people are dying a lot. And what's interesting I find, it's funny, love him or hate him, but Jeremy Clarkson has done a really, really good documentary about the VC. And his father-in-law, I think, actually has won a VC as well. But he... The Yinnima Yang. The common thread seems to be that they're not the type of guys who go, yeah, I did this, what it like they they won't talk about it. Often you can't find a lot of detail
Starting point is 00:34:13 about what they've done, but it's always something. They've always put themselves in like they've basically run into fire. They're crazy and Charles Oppa was a fucking mad dog. So he was born in Central Cross Church on the 21st of September in 1908. Isaac Kiwi. Isaac Kiwi. Isaac. So he didn't get the love gun. He didn't get the love gun.
Starting point is 00:34:38 I don't even know what I'm talking about. I'm sure that was a fact. He was the son of John Oppa, a lawyer, and his wife Agatha Mary Coates. No one knows what Agatha did. You know, it was 19 or why. She probably didn't do anything. Other than have children and sit quietly. As my, uh, leave that comment and sit quietly. He attended Canary Agricultural College, which is now known as Lincoln University, and he earned a diploma in agriculture in 1930. He worked first as a shape farmer, later as a manager, and then valuing farms for the New Zealand government.
Starting point is 00:35:16 He worked with shape in New Zealand. And I. Unheard of. Unbloody, believable mate, you wouldn't write about it. You guys know that apparently outside of Australia, like around here the joke is New Zealand and shape. New Zealand and shape, isn't it? Am I right?
Starting point is 00:35:32 I'm New Zealand and shape, people are my right. But apparently like in England and America, they're like Australians in shape. I was in a traveling and people were giving me a gun. I love this shape, right down there. I'm like, no, that's New Zealand. You got to so wrong New Zealand fuck shake. Yeah, not us. No When we're not the ones that the dumb joke is about yeah, no, so you got to taste it now
Starting point is 00:35:56 We make that joke. Do you still make that joke? No, I never made that joke now that you see how much I've never made that joke. I love New Zealand. No, I don't believe me, believe me. I can't believe him. I think you guys are good at all wrong. Oh. So yeah, in September of 1939, he enlisted at the age of 30. And he was soon promoted to Tempere Lance Corporal, but initially declined to place in an officer cadet training unit.
Starting point is 00:36:24 In December, he was promoted to Sergeantgent and a week later sailed for Egypt. In May of 1941, Upperm was commanding a platoon in the battle for Malim airfield. During the course of an advance of 3,000 yards his platoon was held up three times. Has he just rocketed through the ranks? No. Yes. No. Kind of. Yeah, pretty quickly. So September of 1939, he enlisted and then he, I think December of maybe the next year, he was a sergeant. And then he's running a whole bloody platoon. Yeah. And he's carrying so while he's carrying a bag of grenades, which was his favorite weapon a bag of grenades Everyone choose a weapon shotgun bag of grenades
Starting point is 00:37:08 Like what kind of bag you're picturing I'm picturing like a nice velvety satchel. Oh, I'm thinking like a Hessian sack Satchel is much better But I'm also imagining when you said I'm like matching purple which doesn't Yeah purple but right. Yeah purple. Yeah, really good which doesn't really know if he's outfit, but right. Let's see if he can do that. Yeah, purple, yeah. Regal. No, I'm imagining him in the grenades are inside a giant bag
Starting point is 00:37:30 like the shaped like a grenade. Wow, yeah. That's good. A backpack. So people know what to expect before they die. Yes, that's good. No, but then he like, I don't really, I just like saying satchel.
Starting point is 00:37:42 It's a fun way to say. He's a fun way. But his bag looks like a grenade, so people like when they come up with grenades in there, that'd be too obvious. Yeah. He's probably got machine guns in there. And people's like grenades are like,
Starting point is 00:37:51 oh, he's quite literal. And I respect that. So they respect him before they die. Yeah, that's nice. That is nice. That's why you get a VC. So he's carrying a bag of grenades. And he first attacked a German machine gun nest killing eight paratroopers
Starting point is 00:38:06 Then destroyed another which had been set up in a house Finally he crawled to within 15 yards of an anti-aircraft gun before knocking in house When the advance had been completed. He took it on. He took it on. I did 10 rounds I mean I was like a picture of him just jumping on guns like big and just punching him. Yeah TKO Punching tanks in the face. Take that and a bit of that and a little bit of this. When the advance had been completed he helped carry a wounded man to safety and full view of the enemy and then ran half a mile under fire to save a company from being cut off like they were yeah. Is this on in one day?
Starting point is 00:38:41 On in one day. That's just crazy crazy two Germans who tried to stop him were killed You can imagine how but with grenades with grenades but by him by him The next day up until next day. I'll just he's got a wounded body over one shoulder With the other is dipping into the satchel to pull and you know pins out with his teeth The German guys like I'll just stop you right there and now pins out with his teeth. Jeremy guys, I'll just stop you right there. Oh! The next day, I was wounded in the shoulder by a mortar burst
Starting point is 00:39:10 and hit in the foot by a bullet. Shot, you could say. Hit in the foot by the bullet. Under turret, he continued fighting and with his arm in a sling, hobbled about in the open to draw enemy fire and enable their gun position to be spotted. So he's like, using himself as as bait so they knew where the guns were so that they could then
Starting point is 00:39:30 attack. Wow. Wow. With his unwounded arm, he propped his rifle in the fork of a tree and killed two approaching Germans as well. So he's just like- So we use the tree to hold up the gun? Yeah, because he's hurt in the shoulder. Well. Yeah. This is, he may be a badist ass yet. It keeps going. During the retreat from Crete Upperm succumbed to dysentery and could not eat properly.
Starting point is 00:40:00 The effect of this and his wounds made him look like a walking skeleton, which is what one of his commanding officers noted down in a diary It looked like a walking skeleton. Nevertheless, he found the strength to climb the side of a 600 foot ravine and use a bread gun on a group of advancing Germans. At a range of 500 yards, he killed 22 out of 50. Did you say a bread gun? Bread. Oh, bread.
Starting point is 00:40:22 Love gun. A bread gun. It's a shooting baguette, Southern. Wow. Also, it's got different setting, so it's not. Kill him with carrots. What's your favorite type of bread? Oh, light-right. Forgetts. You've nailed it in one.
Starting point is 00:40:33 Yeah, they're good, aren't they? Yeah, they're all good. Get a bit of dip. Yeah. Cheese. Bit of maybe olive oil. Who's manning the olive oil gun? Bit of ducka.
Starting point is 00:40:42 Or dookah? Or dookah? I love a light-right. I love a light rye. I love a dark rye. Into my yang, my man. I like a light rye too. It's right together. Rye or die.
Starting point is 00:40:52 That's what you yell with the rum, with the bread going, Rye or die, motherfucker. Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Okay, it's a bit of a treat, just like a white roll, but nice and crusty on the outside, but the real soft on the inside. And just feel it full of just yummy things. Oh yeah, I'll go make one right now. Oh, you've got it all wrong, scummy best. Just you. Squeeze in like a Ferrero, O'Shea.
Starting point is 00:41:21 I don't know what, I'm just having a stab here. I've put in. These things are yummy. So, here's soft sequence. Ferrero Rocher. I don't know what I'm just having a stab here. I've put in these things are yummy. So he is subsequent. So the range of 500 yards he killed 22 out of 50 approaching Germans. He's subsequent VCs citation recorded that he had performed a series of remarkable exploits showing outstanding leadership tactical skill and utter indifference to danger He has he is not different to danger. He's even under the hottest fire up him never wore a still helmet
Starting point is 00:41:55 Explaining that he could never find one fitted him To be got too small, he's not wearing a helmet this whole time by the way He's got so fucking cool. I want to make I I want to, someone to make, I'm gonna take it on myself, I want someone to make an Avengers of these bad asses. Your Mad Jack Churchill, you got up him, you got the three Ronnies. Well three Monty's, three Monty's. Including text. I remember text ban well. Text ban well. So good. In forty one up and was presented with his first Victoria cross-middle when he was informed of the world his response was it's meant for the men meaning it's he hates women
Starting point is 00:42:35 I knew that I knew that was going to be a the city under current eventually city underbelly up on that's really disappointing I was just really coming around to him Anyway, yeah, okay, he meant that it was for them that he did the anyway. All right Equate from the citation when the award was presented because he showed superb coolness man Really they wrote superb coolness, man. Really, they wrote superb coolness. Coolness. Imagine being presented with an award for superb coolness. Yeah, I can't imagine.
Starting point is 00:43:09 I can't imagine. I just cannot. It's within my grasp. Superb coolness, great skill and dash, and complete disregard of danger. His conduct and leadership inspired his whole platoon to fight magnificently throughout, and in fact, was an inspiration.
Starting point is 00:43:24 To the hit song wow he would have loved that that is supreme cool that is supreme cool now you're thinking of a kind of Doradas. This is very cool. Are you working way too hard for way too little? There's never been a better time to consider a career in IT. You could enjoy a recession-resistant career in a rewarding field with plenty of growth opportunities and often flexible work environments.
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Starting point is 00:44:42 Kia. Movement that inspires. Call 800-333333 for Kia for details always stripes safely His second VC was earned on July 15, 1942 when the New Zealanders were concluding a desperate defense of the Ruissette Ridge in the first battle of Alamane was set ridge in the first battle of Allermain. Up him ran forward through a position swept by machine gun fire and lobbed grenades into a truck full of German soldiers. What? When it became urgently necessary to take information to advance units which had become separated,
Starting point is 00:45:19 up him took a Jeep on which a captured German machine gun was mounted and drove it through the enemy position. At one point, the vehicle became bogged down in sand, so up and cool the order some nearby Italian soldiers to push it free. Hey! How you? Though they were somewhat surprised to be given an order by one of the enemy. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I was expression left them in no doubt that he should be obeyed you're fucking kidding That's great the enemy pushed him out when he was bogged Whoa, they probably even speak the same fucking language. No He's he's gesturing was so good. They were like we better do what he says But they were like, we better know what he says. You push, you push, me drive, me kill you.
Starting point is 00:46:11 You later. But now push. By now Oppam had been wounded, but not badly enough to prevent him leading an attack on the enemy's strong point. He was shot in the elbow and his arm was broken. The New Zealanders were surrounded and outnumbered, but up him carried on directing fire until he was wounded in the leg and could no longer walk. Legs, I should say sorry. He was captured and taken as a POW, and he was sent to an Italian hospital with an Italian
Starting point is 00:46:39 doctor recommended his wounded arm be amputated. They didn't really have, they had fairly scarce supplies, and they were worried that they weren't really able to prevent or treat gangrene, so it was better to just, just to lob it off. He refused, up and refused. That's my grenade arm. It knows for a part because the operation would,
Starting point is 00:47:01 would have to be carried out without an ascetic, and he had witnessed other patients dying at agony under surgery. So he's like, mm-hmm, not doing that, thanks. No an ascetic for surgery, interesting. He remained in the hospital to recuperate but attempted to escape numerous times before being branded dangerous by the Germans.
Starting point is 00:47:18 Wait, so he's a prisoner of war camp. Yeah. Oh, it's so funny, yeah, they still go to their hospitals and go, yeah, we'll just lock your arm off. Like I'm not trusting the Nazi doctors either. Yeah, weird, right? Yeah, that is weird. I never thought about that.
Starting point is 00:47:34 Yeah. You get captioned like, all right, you're after the Nazi hospital. Ugh. I'm not gonna get the best treatment. Am I trusting that they're gonna be giving me the best? One attempt to escape occurred when a group of peer-waves were being transported in open trucks through Italy Up him jumped from the truck at a bend and managed to get about 370 meters away before he was recaptured
Starting point is 00:47:54 He'd broken an ankle and jumping from the moving truck. Oh, no, 370 meters on it When they recaptured him he said no, you drive me home and they did When they recaptured him he said no you drive me home and they did. Another attempt occurred when he was being moved between prison camps on a civilian train while guarded by two Germans. Upperm was only allowed to visit the toilet when the train was travelling at high speed to prevent him from jumping through a window. Nevertheless, Upperm pride opened the toilet window and jumped under the tracks knocking himself unconscious.
Starting point is 00:48:23 Oh no, it went on and was going quick. Yeah, it's going really fast. On a third occasion, he tried to escape a camp by climbing its fences in broad daylight. He became entangled in barbed wire when he fell down between the two fences. When a prison guard pointed a pistol at his head and threatened to shoot, up him calmly ignored him and lit a cigarette. What? This scene was photographed by the Germans as evidence and later reprinted in his biography,
Starting point is 00:48:51 which is called Mark of the Night. Oh, I was going to say that's one of those things you just say, but then he's got a fucking photo of it. After this incident, Upperm was considered extremely dangerous and was placed in solitary confinement. It was also considered extremely cool. So cool, superb, cool. Super, it was super cool. So he's in solitary confinement now, so he's only allowed to exercise alone
Starting point is 00:49:10 while accompanied by two armed guards, so not really alone, is he? So he's got two spotters. Guys, I'm just going to go for the high bar see. It's sort of a fall if one of you could catch me, that'd be great. Thanks. You got it up. All right, and if the other one could just shout encouragement, that'd be really good. That'd be really helpful because I have a bloody native. I don't have any upper body strength. All bones that are attached. Yeah. Because he's sound he looked like a skeleton before. He looks like a skeleton. His skeleton sounds fucked. He's wouldn't have a bone that's complete in his body. So yeah he's he's I was just funny how you
Starting point is 00:49:47 like yeah they were broken we get it bones yeah I mentioned it several times and I went back and and set it a couple times yeah skeleton so he's he's in soul drinking environment he's got two armed guards with him at all time. Despite these precautions, Oppen bolted from his little courtyard straight through the German barracks and out through the front gate of the camp. The guard in the machine gun tower later told other prisoners that he refrained from shooting up a matter of sheer respect. Wow.
Starting point is 00:50:21 And as he could see the guard, the German soldiers coming up the road And he he was thought well they'll they'll get him So he let him get out and he's like well these German soldiers right there. They'll catch it That's weird. It's very weird. So he was soon recapped and obviously by those German soldiers and he was sent to the infamous cul-dits Castle. Oh, that's the castle. yeah. On the 14th of October 1944. Whereabouts are we, Dave? Well, Jess, probably, but you'd heard of that castle, I don't even know what comes through. Yes, I guess. I think it's a famous German prisoner of war camp. It's like an up-on-amounting type thing. In Germany or somewhere in Europe. I think it's in Germany, yeah.
Starting point is 00:51:00 I think so. When Colossal was captured by American forces, most of the inmates made their own way home immediately. Aphum joined an American unit, was armed and equipped, and wanted to fight the Germans. So he's obviously had some healing, his arms come good? Yeah, well, yeah, I think it's been in there for a while. And he's skeleton, which is made up of bones. Yeah, as you connect to the Yeah, it's somehow healed itself That's wild this guy's great. I can VC actually stands for very cool
Starting point is 00:51:35 That's offensive to VC winners only in this case I'm almost keen to see action again, but was instead sent to Britain where he was reunited with Molly McTamney. So you what? What's the opposite of action? Actions! Britain in the 1940s, alright? What a drab dreary town. Not like now. London is a real center point in the world of culture and good times. My parents are in London right now.
Starting point is 00:52:04 What? I miss them so much. I'm really worried about them. They haven't been able to. They haven't been able to. Now I'm just, like, it's a big flood over and I was a bit worried about them. I haven't done a big flood like that before. I was genuinely quite worried.
Starting point is 00:52:14 I've never been to Europe. Never been to Europe. Oh, I think I know the best time of their lives. They're best, they haven't a great time. But I worry about them. Let's go to Europe. All right. Yes. Let's get a cold, it's castle. Yeah,. Let's go to Europe. All right.
Starting point is 00:52:25 Yes. Let's get a cold, it's castle. Okay, yeah. That would be great. How genuinely be keen. Anyway. Oh, we could do a live pod from a castle. Oh, I don't want to do it from there.
Starting point is 00:52:33 No, yeah, that would not be. If it's a real bad. Esco, there's a really cool story where a bunch of prisoners broke out of there with this elaborate escape plan, which would be a sick episode. Put it in the hat. Can we put stuff in the hat? No. Oh somebody put it in the hat. Come on. Please. Anyway, so he goes to Britain. He's reunited with Molly who was
Starting point is 00:52:56 serving as a nurse and they were married in New Milton and Hampshire on the 20th of June 1945 and he returned to New Zealand in early September and she followed him in December. So now he's finished with his war. Just in time for Christmas. Perfect. For his actions that I described earlier, he was awarded a bar to his VC. His citation noted that he's completely in difference to danger and his personal bravery have become a byword in the whole of the New Zealand Expendatory Force. Ordered a bar, that is a real high honor. Does he have to run it? Always it like, you know, does management come in and he just gets to like drink there and hang out or whatever
Starting point is 00:53:41 or... It's more one of those. It's like a setter. It's just... of those it's like a set it's just he can because I mean it's a burden a lot of ways if it's like a run down Establishment you know it's a fixer upper if it's a fixer upper. I mean is that really an honor? You know what I mean remember a few weeks ago where you kept smelling my drink bottle to see if I'd been drinking Yeah, Maddie I'd been drinking. Yeah. Maddie, have you been drinking? We... Fun or enough, yes, but not that much. The difference is that it was a surprise with you, Jess.
Starting point is 00:54:15 I've had two beers. Matt's a given. Why'd one be you, actually? Which is it? One or two? That means three He's got a problem Anyway, is it he's a little fun fact. So he's got he's getting his second his second Vc right so King George What's a VI six?
Starting point is 00:54:35 Yes, yes Actually, and it's short fur That's never worked before ever. I just shook my head at him and he shut up. Just, it's done what I'm blocking today. What are you gonna say? I felt like I haven't had a lot of support here. I've tried to...
Starting point is 00:54:54 I've tried to chase down a few... Maddie? I'm just trying to... Yeah, what is it? I'm trying to have some fun. No, no, look to be honest. You can George V. What is it?
Starting point is 00:55:03 It's fine. I just realized we've got it the wrong way around. It's King George, the sixth, he chose the name George. Albert was his name. That's what I said before. Do we set the other way around? I think he did. No, I said his name was Albert and then his regnal name was George.
Starting point is 00:55:15 Great. We said that right. Thanks for interrupting Matt. Right as he was about to make progress, Matt. King George V was like, hey, you don't, you don't want to see me have fun on the show. You want to be the only one who has a good time. Now, you and Dave have a fun riff, and I'll sit here and watch.
Starting point is 00:55:32 Well, it's been like that for 98 other episodes. Why change now? 98, you wish mate. Oh, yeah, fuck. So, King George V, insert joke here, had invested up and with his first Victoria across a Buckingham Palace back in 1945. When the recommendation was made for the second VC, the King remarked to major general Howard Kippenberger that a bar to the cross would be very unusual indeed, and firmly said, does he deserve it?
Starting point is 00:56:05 And Kippenberger applied in my respectful opinion, sir, up and one the V.C. several times over. He's one, heaps! I think that's pretty cool. It's got a little satchel full. Just, he's full of satchels. He's got one satchel, he's got one victory across his. You do not want to mix them up.
Starting point is 00:56:29 So you are wearing a hand grenade and I bow to thee. See that support that Jess just gave Dave and that little roof? Must be nice Dave, must be real nice. It really is, it really is. I've got a statue for the support over here. Thank you Jess. Friendship. Now back in New Zealand, Upram-resisted invitations to take up politics. In appreciation for his heroism, some of 10,000 pounds was raised to buy him a farm.
Starting point is 00:56:56 He appreciated the tribute but declined the money, which was used to endow the child's up-and-school ship fund to send sons of ex-servicemen to university. Oh, he's a good guy too. He's such a good dude. But why would he need a farm? He's already got this bar, he's got to fix up. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:57:11 How many burdens do you need? Oh, you're going to give me a fixer up a farm as well? It probably would be, let's be honest. Yeah. 10,000 pounds. Come on, what do you buy him? But it was just like a lavender farm or something. I know the time lavender had a very low value.
Starting point is 00:57:25 What about now? Oh, now it's through the roof. What a man, great. If you're thinking ahead, which he obviously wasn't, it would have been a great investment. But very cool on the sporting field of war. But once he got home to the sporting field of civility and arid you know, dropped the ball.
Starting point is 00:57:46 You know, sporting was metaphorically speaking of course. Do you see why we don't let you riff? Well, so it's a different... That's the difference. That's what I'm saying. I'm saying the support was there, you know. Riffs live or die because of the bouncingness. And... When you... When you don't shut the fuck up. was there, you know, riffs, riffs live or die because of the bouncingness and um when you
Starting point is 00:58:06 when you when you um you just silently shake your head at me um what I call the opposite of support um not a very up and kind of value um. Please say do go on. Do go on. Thank you. Firstly, determine to avoid all publicity. Up and at first refused to return to Britain for a victory parade in 1946 and only gave in at the request of the New Zealand Prime Minister. Yes, to be like the Prime Minister is like, Charlie.
Starting point is 00:58:41 Come on, mate. Come on, mate. Come on, mate. All right. P.M. I'll do it for you. It'll be fun. Oh. Come on, come on. Come on, mate. Come on, mate. All right. PM, I'll do it for you. It'll be fun.
Starting point is 00:58:49 Oh, they say fun the same as us. I'm trying to make one of their accent, but they just sound the same with that one. Fem. It'll be fun. Yeah, it's about right. Also in 1946, up in Border Farm of his own, didn't need you, your donation.
Starting point is 00:59:04 Oh, I didn't need a hand-me-down farm. Border Farm at Rufferdowns, some 100 miles north of Christchurch, and he worked, so there's sort of a similar area to where he'd worked before the war, and there he finally found the anonymity that he desired. Although somewhat hampered by his injuries, he became a successful farmer and served on the Board of Governors' Christ's College for nearly 20 years. He and Molly had three daughters and lived on their farm until January of 94, went up and poor health forced him to retire the Christ Church. He died in Canterbury on the 22nd of November in 94, surrounded by his wife and daughters.
Starting point is 00:59:37 The year he retired, he died. How old was he? Good question. Well, he was born in, oh, girl, I don't even know. He was born in 1908 and died in 1994. And he retired at 86. Yeah. That isn't Matt. This is an incredible guy after all this. And also, he'd be, he's broken every bone in his body. It's been shot a million times. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:03 It really hurt. They've got, they've's hot take on getting shot, no, but I mean like forever you your body would never be good And you're a farmer to your 86 and then you don't you're getting shot would hurt man. I reckon yeah, I reckon a wood I mean I haven't haven't had it happen to me can we try? Yeah, kill me. No, I didn't say kill you No, if you if you're dead, you don't you won't be able to tell someone. I'll let you know as I go as I go out. Okay. How would you do that? I just like, ah yeah, now that hurts. Give us another one. And then and then all this pain would be over. Oh God. So sorry.
Starting point is 01:00:40 It's a pain of the wound in my shoulder. Okay, cool. the pain of the the wound in my shoulder. Okay cool. His funeral was in the Christchurch Cathedral and was conducted with full military honours. The streets of Christchurch were lined by over 5,000 people. Up in Miss Buried in the graveyard of St Paul's Church and his death was also marked by memorial service in 1995 in London, attended by representatives of the Royal Family, Senior New Zealand Government and political figures attended by representatives of the Royal Family, senior New Zealand government and political figures, senior members of the British and New Zealand Armed Forces, the commander of the Allied Forces in Crete, and the seventh governor general of New Zealand,
Starting point is 01:01:13 as well as representatives of veterans organizations and other VC and George Crossholders. So... And I asked the people, we were like, all right, we got to pull it out of the stops of this guy. Yeah, it was a pretty big deal. So that is basically my story about Charles Oppam, two-time VC winner. That, yeah, what an incredible life. Pretty cool, huh? But also, like I saw, I found on YouTube,
Starting point is 01:01:37 remember this show, this is your life? Yeah. God, that was a good show. Mike Monroe. But it wasn't Mike Monroe because it was a New Zealand version. Got it, smiley. New Zealand version Mike Monroe. But it wasn't Mike Monroe because it was New Zealand version. Yeah, it's not really. New Zealand version. Um, probably not guys.
Starting point is 01:01:48 Meek. No, that's not a good, fossil pro. Um, but I saw they did, they did one for Charles Opperman. He was like, oh, he was on it. He agreed to be on it. Yeah, well, I mean, they don't really give you a choice to that because I don't think he would agree to that. They ambushed him on the farm.
Starting point is 01:02:03 They do. They do. Hey, Oppam.. They ambushed him on the farm. They do. Hey, up him. Oh fuck. Not on the farm. I don't know. But they ambushed him and they took him and he just like. And he pulled out a bag of hand grenades instead of throwing. It's actually terrible television. Oh, is it? Because he's so modest and he's not into it. He doesn't want to talk about himself. That's interesting. He would have liked to have signed off on it to let them. Yeah, of course. But he would have been like oh he made such a fast I don't want to ruin everyone's time. But he's just kind of like looking down a lot and like he's listening and but he's it's not really engaged or that much it's like it's hard to
Starting point is 01:02:35 watch but it's just because of the nature of that person. So when did he die? 94. 94 so this is in the early 90s? I reckon even in the late 80s possibly yeah. Yeah right. It was a long time ago. But yeah, very cool. But you often get that as well with all of them. They tend to just be quite humble. And I remember one of them quite recently.
Starting point is 01:02:56 I wish I remember which one I was. This is an Australian guy but didn't tell his wife or something. That he was being awarded the V.C. Didn't tell him. So I didn't want to make it first. Well. Pretty cool. Do you want to hear just something real quick, like a little fun fact as well? I would love to.
Starting point is 01:03:15 Matt doesn't get to say. Did you know? He's going with me. There's a Victoria across the equivalent for animals. I did not know. It's called the, my- me. There's a Victoria across equivalent for animals. I did not know. It's called the Dickon Medal. He he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he We also said. And it's mostly, I'm going to list here of recipients of the second medal. Most of them. What animal do you think they are?
Starting point is 01:03:50 Dogs. Doggies. Dogs are quite, their dogs are up there, especially sort of later on more recently. Camels. Few horses. Giant tortoises. Mostly in the early days. Parrots.
Starting point is 01:04:01 Pigeons. Pigeons. The first one?, first one. Carrier, a pigeon called White Vision in December of 1943. Delivered a message that led to the rescue of a ditched heircru in October 1943. She flew nine hours in bad visibility. That is incredible. That is amazing. We just got a medal.
Starting point is 01:04:25 That's so great. Yes. That's so good. Yeah, anyway, I just thought that was a real thing. I think all the other pigeons have to bow to it now. Yeah, I see. Assuming it's still going. They know the rules.
Starting point is 01:04:36 That's nine hour flight. That is pretty great. It's pretty great. I mean, it is. Does the bird know it's getting in the board, though? Does the bird know it's done anything good board so? Does the bird know it's done anything good? The bird's light vision. The birds I'd prefer it. Just a bit of light right. I mean, much nicer. Get the bird out the breadcrumbs. Get the breadcrumbs.
Starting point is 01:04:54 The breadcrumbs. Oh here we go. Far out the breadcrumbs. Anyway, that's my report. Thank you. Matt, I just want to extend a very sincere... I'll give you a... I'm... Are you serious? I was gonna give you a medal for... Mark. For Valor. Uh...
Starting point is 01:05:12 I was about to offer a very sincere apology for shutting you down. And as I went to do that, you interrupted me. I felt like, was that... Is that karma? Is that the karma bus? Will these two ever get along? I was that, is that karma? Is that the karma bus? Will these two ever get along? I was, now I was gonna say I give your reporter a bronze Dickens award for being a real
Starting point is 01:05:35 dog. He's the best dog here. No, the report, you dildo, not the fucking jazz. Did I just get a dildo middle? Let's give you a brass dildo Dave. Oh great best side kick. Make everyone bow down to it. Yeah to the dildo. Yeah. You carry it around. I can only go up. Forever up. Well thank you so much to our Golden Hat suggestion there. Yep, Stuart Olcock, thank you very much.
Starting point is 01:06:08 Stuart Olcock, so good. Is Stuart an New Zealander? Do we think? I don't know. Maybe. I have such a cool New Zealand here. Man, thank you so much to a cracking topic that if it hadn't gone to the Golden Hat, perhaps never would have made it onto the show.
Starting point is 01:06:21 I never heard of sticking right up on. Me, but I like him. What a champ. He probably is the baddest of the bad asses. He does sound like the baddest ass. No doubt. It's got the worst ass of the lot. Oh, so bad.
Starting point is 01:06:34 Look, his ass is awful. It's all over the shop. It all just goes up. But, you know, it's up and up and up. Right up and up. Took me a sec to get it. If you would like to support the show via Patreon, like our good friend Stuart Allcock has done via the golden hat,
Starting point is 01:06:52 you can head up patreon.com. So let's do go on pod. We're gonna release our bonus monthly episode very, very soon. If you wanna get on that bandwagon, we'd also like to thank, along with Stuart, a couple other people that support the show through Patreon. Yes, may I kick it off? Oh, just please do.
Starting point is 01:07:09 Well, I'd like to thank a couple of people, the first one. It's actually someone that we know because we've met this person at, um, firstly a Planet Broadcasting... Are you about to thank Matt? We have met, Matt. Unfortunately. You think you'd feel cute again? I'm not thinking you'd be getting thanked every time. I love feel cute. He'd feel cute again. I'm not thinking. He seems to be getting thanked every time.
Starting point is 01:07:26 I love feel cute. He just loves feel cute. I love feel cute. He's having to $100. He's got a million dollar smile feel cute. Feel cute. Sorry for saying your name so many times feel cute, but also not because it's a cool name. But the other person that we would like to think who we met at the same time we met
Starting point is 01:07:41 feel cute. And who also came to a couple of our live shows at the Comedy Festival very very lovely friend of ours from here in Melbourne. Wow. Sof Walden. Oh sof what a legend. Thank you. Sof. I wonder if Sof is brought up ticket to a hundred of them so she'll feel guilty now she has. But thank you so. I think we should award each of these listeners a... What award would you give so if, Jess? Oh, okay. A military award. That might be... I don't know if that...
Starting point is 01:08:13 That might be a little offensive. How about a daytime Emmy? Daytime Emmy, great. Yes! I don't know if she quite deserves a military award. I don't know, maybe she does. No, I was wondering like what your criteria was What type of award? I reckon it's no time Emmy good one. Yeah, that is good. Absolutely
Starting point is 01:08:30 Yeah, he told me is that is a very funny sounding award The other person that I would like to think as well while we're here if you don't mind. I don't want This time not as local as Sophie Melbourne. This all the way from Virginia It was West Virginia. Matt mama. Damn it. I thought really like to think the Mothman The prophecies come true get off the bridge trying to warn us if anyone is listening to this going over the bridge Can you stop? I haven't listened bridge. He's trying to warn us. If anyone is listening to this, come over the bridge. Can you stop spawning? I haven't listened yet. I'm trying to save a laugh.
Starting point is 01:09:09 No, can't. You're ruining a story. No, I'd like to think the Mothman himself. Brad Smith. Oh, Brad Smith's the Mothman. Brad Smith. Brad Smith, you naughty Mothman, you. Brad Smith, great name. I think Brad's a rock solid name. I love a rock solid name like Brad Smith you naughty moth man you Brad Smith great name I think Brad is a rock solid name I love a rock solid name like Brad Smith
Starting point is 01:09:29 Brad he sounds like you could have been a cowboy probably I'm not a ward do you give what about the the Academy Award for best foreign film Brad from from Virginia that's foreign to us I us. I can't that'll do. Could I thank you a couple? Yeah I'm gonna try and think of some awards. Please. Great. I'd love to thank. Oh and I know I know both of these people. That's exciting. Dan Barley who I met at our Sydney live show. It's a bloody gentleman. We all met Dan. He's a he had he had maybe the most Yeah, maybe the most Shvelte Guns that I'd ever seen he was it was it was a gun show and
Starting point is 01:10:09 Tattoo show and a tattoo show he was there was a double feature Tell you what I could not take my eyes off those guns I Did I mean I probably clanced at him briefly it would would have been weird. Conversation otherwise. You're transfixed. Real nice guy. I liked him a lot. What award would you give him, Jess? I would give down. I just Googled obscure awards. And I would give down the stellar award for the dumbest lawsuit. Wow. Dan Bowley. Dan knows what he did. He works in advertising I think.
Starting point is 01:10:43 Yeah, well that's wrong. So obviously that makes quite a bit of sense. No, he knows what he did he works in advertising I think And also I'd love to thank Pete Curry my boss he runs the quiz masters trivia You laughing it you laughing in the idea of trivia the idea that I've got a boss? No, not at all. I've just, I've tried to find other awards, and these are all terrible awards that I cannot give to nice people like Pete. Well, Pete Curry, who I am also a big, big fan of, hello Pete. There's always a 50, 50 question in the quiz masters quiz that Pete runs, which is real award or fake award.
Starting point is 01:11:22 Oh, there is, too. Yeah. It's one of the, is it the last? Yeah the last question. Is this a real award? Well, sometimes I throw in like little funny ones like the Peter Curry award for best home renovation. Great. That is a very funny one. Well maybe all the hosts go. That's my boss. Well maybe, maybe Pete would have heard of the Ernie Awards Maybe Pete would have heard of the Ernie Awards for the most sexist comment. Oh no! That one goes to bloody Charlie Appam.
Starting point is 01:11:51 This one's for the man. I have not taken any bullets for any of the women until you learn much. What's the award for sexiest comment? Because that's much better. The Bert Awards. Oh yeah. The sexist one, Ernie. Do you get it?
Starting point is 01:12:08 Bert Nerny. What do you get it? I get it, I love it. Matt, do you get my joke? I do. I get it so much and I want to dedicate that joke of Jess's just then to Pete Curry and Dan Bali. Because I think you guys deserve that joke more than anyone.
Starting point is 01:12:21 To Pete and Dan. Bert Nerny. I would out, out, Bert Nerni. Out, out Bert Nerni. I would like to thank a couple of people, Tony, I'll buy a Mac. Peyton's also got Svelte guns, by the way. Oh, I can't get my ass off him. Svelte gun. I've never seen this man's guns, but he's got a gun collection.
Starting point is 01:12:39 Oh. He's got guns. He sounds like he's got money. He's got guns in his legs. Guns in his legs. Yeah, what? Probably the recipient of the Usain Bolt award for best leg guns. Oh, you're slipping, mate. Or a Grammy for best urban album. Yeah, he saved it.
Starting point is 01:13:03 It's Tom Price from the urban capital of the UK. Shropshire. Shropshire. Shropshire. That's wonderful. I love fucking so much. I love you. I love you so much.
Starting point is 01:13:16 That's my new voice. Trying that out Tom. What do you think? The only way you could do it is doing this weird rat face. His face is fucked. I love it so much, though. I'm going to do a little video about it. doing this weird rat face. His face is fuck. I love it so much though. I'm gonna do a little video about it. It looks like that dog.
Starting point is 01:13:27 You know that dog that always wins ugliest dog in the world. Yeah. Oh come on. You know that meme that was like Steven with a V? Yeah, that's what it looks like. He's Steven with a V. I don't know that meme but I'm a fucking offended. I can't find a cure on your voice. I can't stay with a V. I can't find a cure on my voice but I'm a fucking offended
Starting point is 01:13:52 I'm gonna find it now no stupid with a pH it was like At least say the age correctly, please Thank you That felt good to get it back a little bit Tom Price that was for you, that little at best. And I'd also like to thank... We are ending in our favorite state of all. From Canton, Ohio. We're gonna do a split-screen photo
Starting point is 01:14:44 I'm just saying it here, Dave I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm Steven. Haha. Haha. Haha. This is very, very good. This is the dog that you look like. You look like that dog from the internet when you do the face. It is very, very good. Oh, that was great. I would like to thank all the way from Canton, Ohio.
Starting point is 01:15:30 Oh, Ohio! Just outside of Akron. Oh, Ohio. Mr. We say Akron wrong. Oh, sorry. Akron. Oh, Akron.
Starting point is 01:15:43 No, that's right. That's very much worse. Let's just say let's stick with Canto and Canto on Ohio Scott Wilkinson. Oh, Wilkinson. He's a bigger higher guy. Something of the right guy. He's got a no higher mascot. Big tweeter. Big tweeter. Thank you, Scott. Thank you, Scott. Thanks, Scott. You're a gun gun. Wow it's all guns today. So for interrupting your thank there with just losing it over that meme but okay. That's great we're taking a favor that for show. I will not allow it. Oh shit that was the best. Now if you two would like to support the show that supports you if you're Matt Jessel Dave, head over to patreon.com so
Starting point is 01:16:32 let's do go one part and you get bonus episodes, shoutouts and you get to vote for my topic. I just did the poll today for what would be a 100th episode. Oh that's exciting. Wait so you're doing the reports in mat night and have to do anything. Yeah Yeah, so good. I love that. Jess, you just have to sell the t-shirts. Okay, down. I can do that I've worked in retail for a long time Come on down if you have a ticket, please do come to the European beer cafe. This set it at five o'clock It's gonna be a gale time. It's gonna be bloody ripper. Hell yeah, do goon kids. Oh shit, that was so fun.
Starting point is 01:17:08 All right guys, for everyone coming to our live show, we'll see you there and for everyone at home, the next time you hear us, it will be our 100th episode. Woo! I've put three sweet. It's spooky. I've put three sweet topics in the hat. You can't go wrong with this one,
Starting point is 01:17:23 can't go wrong. Awesome, can not wait. You normally put go wrong with this one. I can't go wrong. Awesome. Cannot wait. You normally put in a dot or two. Not this time. Two dozen. Two dozen one good one. And I hope they pick right. They always pick right.
Starting point is 01:17:35 They always be good. All right guys, we'll be back. And next week, but until then, I will say thank you and goodbye. Later. Later. Later. Bye, then. Bye! podcasts from our great mites. I mean, if you won't, it's up to you. Are you working way too hard for way too little?
Starting point is 01:18:11 There's never been a better time to consider a career in IT. You could enjoy a recession-resistant career in a rewarding field with plenty of growth opportunities and often flexible work environments. Go to mycomputercareer.edu and take the free career evaluation. You could start your new career in months, not years. Take classes online or on campus. And financial aid is available to qualified students, including the GI Bill. Now is the time. Mycomputercareer.edu
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