Donnell - The Donnell Rawlings Show Episode #083

Episode Date: May 27, 2022

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The Donnell Rawlings Show, live in your face! Fuck out bitch ass nigga, you'll never take my place! so If a nigga can make comedy money riding down the river, who does that? You. We can start. We started? Oh, shit. I'm setting my blue. What I'm saying is the nonprofit organizations, by the time this podcast airs,

we would have probably had a show or get prepared for a show at Wiley's. We would have started the second annual kickball game. We would have done a podcast from something close to a river we would have brought a community together

we would have brought friends and family together and that's the thing that excites me the most I'm excited about Donnell Land it's crazy. Like I always said, it's weird how things happen.

I would have never thought in many years that, like I said earlier, that I would have a situation where I could bring people together, have fun, and then make possibly a coin or two. A coin or two. And just playing games, like kid games. Playing games. This is what Donnell, when I first came up,

not came up with the complete concept of Donnell Land, but I had already been doing different events in Yellow Springs. And a good friend of mine, Mickey, we rented a cabin out there and we had some events. And she was like, yo, fuck Donnell Land. And it was like Donnell Land.

And people was like, what is Donnell Land? To me, Donnell Land is everything Neverland was supposed to be without the, without the, without the, I don't know if Timmy's coming over this weekend without the, without the, without the animals. Yeah. Without,

without the animals, you know what I mean? Without the chickens being choked, if you want to say, you know what I'm saying? Without that. And the reason why I say that, because I, I'm, I'm pretty sure Michael Jackson,

when he had the idea of Neverland, it was a place where you could feel young forever. It was a place where families could have a good time. Although, he kicked all the parents out. They could stay for a couple hours. It's the thought that counts, people. They stayed for a couple hours. Yes. It's the thought that counts people they stayed for a couple hours yes it's the thought that counts and nothing was ever proven

and I'm gonna say say say say say say say say

say say say say say say say say

say say say say say say say say

say say say say say say say say

say say say say say say say say

say say say say say say say say

say say say say say say say say

say say say say say say say say

say say say white people white people trying to take out god white people trying to take out god damn heroes

trying to arrest R. Kelly and put him free R. Kelly well Bill's back up again oh no okay let me just you follow that

that was just a joke free R. Kelly it was a joke I'm just seeing people paying attention Bill Cosby is out and Bill Bill Cosby could be

what about anybody got Bill Cosby number yo I know this sounds crazy how funny this is one thing I like about down in LA in a river run you never know who's going to be float down a river

how crazy would it be if Bill Cosby was on a kayak and he was coming down and he was like I ain't going down Bill Cosby was on a kayak, and he was coming down. He was like, I'm going to. Yes, I'm going to slide up into your. That's called it.

Can you do an impression? Bill Cosby. I don't know. That's all I got for you. Do it again. All right. Okay. Wait a minute.

Let's do this. Improv. You're Bill Cosby and you get in your boat for the first time and then you're floating down the river and you pull up on a canoe

filled with two white bitches well hey you white bitches would you like to get in my boat Well, hey, white bitches. Would you like to get in my boat? We could roll down the river. Keep going, keep going.

Keep going. Keep going. You got to, you got to, you got to. We could roll down the river with me. I don't know. I be like, I'm anybody thirsty. Want to come and build a canoe? He turned Jamaican all of a sudden, too. No, yab, yab, yabba.

A Jamaican build a canoe. Yabba, you want to come and do the canoe? I was going to float. Come here. You can roll my oar. Can you hold on to my oar? Don't drop it. We're going to trade some of the oars for the whores.

The oars. For the whores. We're going to trade some of the divas for the divas. I got some jello. Can you make it wiggle? Okay, first off, I just want to know, where did Bill Cosby ever look like this? What the fuck is this?

He has these dinosaur hands that he always does. Oh, yeah. The T-Rex. All right. And then I'm going to. He does this. Bill Cosby doing a promotion for Donnell Land. Want to go from the streets to the creeks.

From the hoods to the woods. Join Donnell Land. I know our listeners missed us last week. Well, I know I didn't miss you last week. No, I'm just saying. Damn. I'm going to start coughing if you laugh too much.

Hey, yo. Y'all got to be in on this. She got it. She had to read. She had to read. She had to read. She had to read. Nikki had to read. Nikki had to read she had to read she had to read she had to be it nicky had to be it nicky had to be it and i think the funniest titties was on quarantine those shirts were on quarantine okay the funniest okay let me do a disclaimer i'm sorry okay we take covet very serious okay Okay. Here's the story.

And this is so crazy. Because we had, as everybody talks about, yeah, you had COVID, you had COVID, I had COVID, COVID, COVID. So we was having this COVID talk. This was right before the Dave Chappelle situation. So we have the COVID talk. And like COVID people like myself, like Samson, like a lot of people, like a lot of people in the country. What do you mean the COVID people? People that have had it.

Yeah. The coves. Which I hadn't at the time. See, that's the problem. That's what happened. You see? You see? That's the problem.

You see, I'm blaming you. No, don't blame me. I told you. Stop. It's gone. It's been gone for two weeks, but this cough is like sticking with me. Oh you stop it's gone it's been gone for two weeks but this cough is like sticking with me oh stop i'm just i'm tested negative i've even flown out of the country and back testing negative i ain't sure about that but i'm just saying you don't be but i'm coughing away from

you six feet we forgot about that okay so here's the thing and you know it when we are like we're not making fun of it i know but it's still serious it is serious but it's just interesting like because we was all talking about i had i had it and nikki was like this i ain't never had it yo she was like this i ain't never had it and i went to which i said you might have had it no oh no i know i ain't never had it i ain't never had it and she said i ain't never had it and if you're gonna keep saying i ain't never had it here's the thing people had it. And she said, I ain't never had it. And if you're going to keep saying, I ain't never had it, here's the thing, people. When you're so strong about something, this is something you can do.

I learned this in grade school. You texted me that. Knock on wood. I said, just knock on some wood. Knock on wood. And you didn't. Knock on the wood. I hang out with Team Chappelle for one weekend. Wait. One weekend, and I get the big. You didn't hang out with team chappelle for one weekend wait one weekend and

i get the big you didn't hang out with teams well you hang out with team hollywood because we was fuck that don't blame those chapels i mean we we i'm blaming chappelle because y'all have had it over and over and over okay and what and we're living and living and living and living you act like you were having like over it's so hard we've had overs and living. You act like you ain't having like over. It's so hard. We've had overs and got overs and overs. Like now, nigga, we high five you. You got it, nigga. My nigga.

Pow. No, not like that. But yes, our team has had COVID several times. You know, as is a lot of people in the world, they're going to have COVID several times. People had the flu several times. Get to the point where you're dealing with herd immunity, which pretty much means at some point,

everybody has to have it or at least pass through your system. And people are afraid. I know the reasons why people are afraid to get COVID. much means at some point everybody has to have it or at least pass through your system and people are afraid i know the reasons why people are afraid to get covid but the thing i know this may sound crazy it may sound crazy but the thing that you could be excited about getting covid is now your body is building up an immune system to be able to handle it in the event that you get it because eventually it's going to come down niki it to a point where I know how scary it is. I know people have lost lives and everything. But it's going to get to a point where how do we manage it?

And is it that serious where I got to feel like it's life-threatening all the time? It's going to get to the point where it's a cold. And in so many cases of people that I know that have, and it's not that I'm a proponent of vaccine or not vaccine, but so many people that have been vaccinated have been boosted. And in those cases feel that those steps they took contributed to them not getting gravely ill with it, you know,

and that's a confidence people are going to build about getting vaccinated. I'm not even trying to make this podcast. I'm like, yeah, it's the white man trying to hold you down. I'm not trying to do that. Everybody has personal responsibilities to themselves. What do you want to do to protect yourself?

One thing you can't do is you can't be critical of people out here that are trying to live their life as normal you might be one of those extreme people that have to take extra precautions you may not go to gatherings you know i'm saying you may not be that person i think that that's one thing that we've learned about it is um how how can we protect ourself from from getting in any event uh that you get it, what are you going to do?

What's your next steps? And most importantly, because you said you had it and everybody was like, yeah, I took some moxie rocks. You know, all them words and shit. That's Samson right here. That's the first thing he said to me.

White people can't wait to pop a pill. I said I took ginger. He looked at you like witchcraft, right? But you did what what you did. You did what most people do and you put in your body with things that could help you to prevent or at least deal with it. You know, motherfuckers don't even know how, how important it is. One of the most important things they say with COVID, what you need to do is get a lot of vitamin D. Not the one you search.

No, the one I'm searching for. That's what you better say. Yeah, you're searching. Damn, I ain't never seen you. You on a mission. You are on a mission. Right? It's important to go out to the sun. It's important to get vitamin D. It's important to drink water. It's important to do so many other things to protect yourself

from getting it. I haven't had it in a minute. And get sleep. Those basic things. I'm going to tell you something. This one I know it's about to be I don't want to say outbreak or it's about to pop off with the team.

It's when I'm being honest when we started having a little too much fun wait wait you know like in our crew like we had

it popped off in Austin you know and uh what else something else popped off a couple times but it always happens for

crew people I'm around when shit is popping we like oh shit nigga let's add three shows i don't know if you want to do that that read come around on that third show it always happens but i do believe this even with the pandemic when it first kicked off i think that that was God's way of telling the world to slow the fuck down.

Absolutely. You know what I'm saying? We all readjusted our lives and we're like, do I need to go into work? Slow down. It was something because God was like, man, are y'all still going to keep up? So, all right. Pandemic, bam. And I feel like we're bringing that up.

And I just got back from Finland, which it's cold, but it's a great country in how they treat their citizens. And we say for Americans, the pandemic made a slowdown. They're slow. Their government gives them $2,000 a month just to live. Someone wrote like, oh, they're still getting COVID stuff. No, this is pre-COVID. They just take take care of their citizens and like they get free health care their rent my my nephew's rent is like eight hundred dollars a month and he's and they get two thousand dollars

a month so they can just actually live and relax and breathe here in our capitalist country it gets to be a lot and i'm glad you have very good diction thank you and I know like I see the way you move your mouth enunciate enunciate but you like like I think a lot of that has to do with no I love my grandfather was deaf and so I talk with my hands a lot and I and I enunciate my words I don't know if it helps him no it's good a lot of people are intimidated by people that use diction you know that oh this bitch trying to talk all good all proper

it's called diction not the dick son but diction so you went to Finland and did okay because my nephews are out just a little back story my nephews are there he's on a show they flew me out there for a show i want to hear about that punk ass feeling show man we ain't got

no feeling cable man fuck that nigga sure don't point out what i can't davante he don't mean it man davante davante my nephew that nigga fuck all white girls you already know because he has my daddy's eyes and light eyes and he's tall and light skinned. That nigga got the name. You go to Finland, go to Europe, Dante's, Jerome's, Eric's, Daryl's, all of them fuck everything. I was just making fun. Congratulations to him. That's so dope. And this is when I talk about traveling on the podcast before.

It's so interesting to see how you look at the world and look at America after you travel somewhere and come back. And people over in America, so many people are like, man, fuck America. And I know that we have so much issues, police brutality, all type of shit. But America really is still the land of opportunity. Yeah. It's really, it's like. If you are an entrepreneur, if you are a talented athlete, if you are a talented entertainer, the world's your oyster here.

But not only that, you need to, you know, okay, you got the talent, right? But here's the most important thing. If you are a hard worker,

you can work. If you are a hard worker, here's the thing. In life, we look at everything, we have different time frames. You know what I'm saying? You're like, you know, I understand that. And I know why you said that.

I know exactly why you said that, because you're a hard worker. No, and I'm talking about like the hard workers in their field. Say you work, because of capitalism, there's only so much you can make if you're a hard worker. I'm talking like blue collar jobs. You're in construction. You're working. Yeah, but I do agree with that. But it's also what's priority to you, what you prioritize, and what you want to do with that. Because there are so many stories of immigrants that have come here.

Like I'm talking about motherfuckers that say we hear this story all the time my mom scrubbed toilets right yes my mom scrubbed toilets she didn't make a lot of money my mom got her paycheck she didn't um scrub toilets to buy bundles she didn't uh scrub toilets to get shit to contour her shit she didn't scrub toilets to get shit to contour her shit she didn't scrub toilets for that she scrubbed toilets for her family which means your whole mindset and process are on a different shit how much can I save

what can I do and they put their money invested it in their kids and sucked it up that job that the person didn't want it's embarrassing it's embarrassing it's demeaning and all that type and sucked it up, that job that the person didn't want, it's embarrassing, it's demeaning and all that type. And sucked it up and got it done. And basically said, you know what?

And there's so many cases of people like this. Well, you know what? I wanted a certain life. It didn't happen. But now I'm working for my family and I'm working for my kids. So I know it's not easy. And going back to the thing about the timeline. And life so often we like this, oh, I need to have this by this.

I need to have this by this. If I don't have this by this, that makes me this person. That makes me less of this. It ain't about that. Nobody has a timeline. Things happen when it's supposed to happen in a time it's supposed to happen. Now, you could set certain goals for yourself,

but for some reason, I want to make a certain amount of money this year. You don't. You're not a failure at that. You still... You grew in that year. You still grew in that year, and you're still growing.

And the most important part throughout all of this, it don't matter what we pursue in life. It don't matter what we want. It don't matter what upsets you. The most important thing is finding your motherfucking happiness. Absolutely. Happiness in everything. That's why you see some motherfuckers.

I know motherfuckers that got fucking estates. Right? And then, oh, look, I'm over here. I got that sitting back. I'm over here. I'm over here. I'm over here. Look at this shit.

I'm over here. Over here, miserable. And lonely. Lonely and miserable. And I also, I'm going to tell you, I'm going to tell you, some of the dopest motherfucking birthday parties and shit I've been to, gatherings, been in the motherfucking project, it's been in the motherfucking project. It's been in that motherfucker one bedroom

where motherfuckers got everybody in the goddamn kitchen. It's a spade game going over there and you can feel that motherfucking energy. You know what makes it the best too? I put it, when I think about it, it's because it's so small.

That's like my house. Every Thanksgiving, about 22 people fit into my small apartment. When we were living in our one bedroom, I counted 21 people came over for Thanksgiving dinner people were sitting on the floor we was but it was it was the yeah but we had we were forced to interact too because we were on top but it's but it's but it's also it's everything to do with who you are in the vibe you create. And I'm going back on why Donnell Land means so much to me. Yes, do I stand to make a coin off of this? Yes, and I'm not going to make a coin off of anything other than my idea,

my creative, and then all of these things that you have to do to make a function happen. And your wonderful team. And the team. That's another thing. Team is fucking everything. But the thing about, the thing that's most important about this is that

this sense of community, how people, my phone been blowing up. I've been having people telling me like, oh man, I want to get there. When you doing it again? I really, I really, really appreciate that because I didn't know if, because me doing activities at Yellow Springs started during the pandemic.

And I was wondering, were people forced to have this good time? In some cases they were. Would they do it again with everything opening up and you have different options about shit? I'm like, how can I compete with a Justin Bieber concert or something? And then when I realized, as I started doing it, I was tiptoeing into it. And then the energy, the way people felt, it was like this. Yo, motherfucker.

I'm like, you got a choice. You can go wherever you want. Yo, I want to be in Yellow Springs. And it's not, that's not my town. That's 100% Dave's town. Any community. It was people there before Dave. But Dave was very very very involved um

in that community and i used and i i wonder why years dave used to be like yo y'all should come out here y'all should come out to yellow springs motherfucking fuckers in yellow springs nobody want to fuck with no dares and no frogs and no chickens and shit like that. And nobody in the business really could understand why until I started going out there. And I was like, I get it. It's the same thing when people are talking about, like, I like going out camping and off-roading just to get, it's just that getting away.

It doesn't even have to be yellow spring. That's your inner white girl. It's not even a white girl. There's plenty of black people that do it too. But you do have an inner white girl. I call it my inner white gay boy. Really? Is that a white girl. There's plenty of black people that do it too. But you do have an inner white girl. I call it my inner white gay boy. Really? Is that a white girl?

Is a white woman like gay? I'm telling you. I use motherfuckers. Motherfuckers are always like, Danielle, you don't fuck with black chicks. You don't like black chicks. I like chicks. But I will say, on the black side of things,

I always, I don't know, it's a weird connection with that black chick that was the only black cheerleader on the cheerleading team. I played basketball. Were you the only? No.

How many? Two of you guys? All right, two of you guys. But you know, State champs three years in a row, but okay. It's a weird, I could go deep into that.

They want to know that they want to know people people want to i had to get it out i'm sorry could you stop fucking coughing you you fov wait what fresh off the vid yeah fob fresh off the vid iB fresh off the vid I don't know I don't know yeah whenever I start talking about that cause motherfuckers get mad

I don't believe you you like a sir and it's been a lot of talk about that who is this guy he's on Breakfast Club Amour he's like a real

African nigga I mean he like when I say real African nigga like he do the dashikis, every picture he got his hands up or whatever. And he's a professor.

God damn it. I'll just put it like this. He gets very upset, furious, when black men date outside their race. And he made a point that certain cultures, it's like forbidden, they just don't do it. They just don't do it.

And he's saying that why can't the black community follow the same thing? And I used to think when I was younger, it was like, nah, man, don't fuck with them white bitches. Don't fuck with them white bitches. Don't fuck with anybody outside. And then, for the most part, you kind of subscribe to that if that's the only thing you know. And as I started getting older,

I don't think it's important for us to say who anybody's supposed to date. And the most important thing is who you want to love. You know, it's ironic you say that is i feel like mine is complete opposite thing you because i've always been open i had a whole book about it open to dating and and whoever just find love you know and like i feel like as i'm getting older i'm kind of like i do i will never say well i I'm saying it now, but I kind of side-eyed it a little bit. Like, when I see it, I'm just like, not that, but I'm happy people are happy, but I still kind of, there's that little smidgen of a, like,

there was a beautiful black woman for you, you know, like. And it's another, always that little beautiful thing that, like, this, it's that little thing, like, you can be cool with a white bitch, and the little thing is that she'll flip it on you nigga and when she flip it you like my mama told me don't do this shit I need to start listening to my mama

they will flip you anything on anything people in a crazy situation will show you they fucking true colors I remember one time somebody said Donnell why do you you like white chicks? What is it? I was like, I don't have

anything particular, but I will say this. I never heard a white chick say niggas ain't shit. I've never said that. I'm not saying you. But I've heard that so often. I heard that so many niggas ain't shit. Y'all know y'all niggas ain't shit. Niggas ain't shit.

I'll say men ain't shit, but that's overall all of them. You don't think men ain't shit? Not just black. Why? Why? Why? Can we focus on that? Why ain't nigga men's or men niggas?

Overall. Overall. Why aren't men shit? You know what I'm... And I'm going to tell you why And I'm going to tell you why. I'm going to tell you why. Bitches ain't shit. But I've been trying to figure it out all these years.

Fuck you, nigga. Fuck you, bitch. Fuck you. You hear that song? You hear that kid's song? Oh, my God. That's so good. You cry together.

Yeah. You don't cry together. You was the one that said that, bitch. You ain't shit. And fuck you. Yeah, I should have. Fuck you. No, this was the part she said.

She said, I should have got a bigger dick. She didn't say big. Oh, shit should have. Fuck you. No, this is the part she said. She said, I should have got a bigger dick. She didn't say big. And already, no, that's how women are. Your dick could be enormous. Once you get an argument. I know they can get bigger. Pussies can get tighter. You ain't said nothing.

What you said. Okay, dicks get bigger. Pussies get tighter. What is y'all talking about? Keep on talking about all this fuck you bitch fuck you nigga

don't fuck you Kendrick came through with that album no yo I'm telling you yo that song we cried together and this is a good thing

to talk about so what makes men I speak for the street what makes niggas ain't shit. The reason why brothers and men, not just black men, ain't shit is because... Don't you get cold with this one? For the most part, us women, we don't ask for a lot.

I know in theory y'all think we do. What? Hold on. In theory, we don't ask for a lot. I know in theory y'all think we do. What? Hold on. In theory, we ask to be... Oh, y'all don't ask for a lot. We ask to be treated right. We ask to be... I'm not lied to.

You know, like... If you find the right... I'm not talking about the bitches that you're talking about. The bitches ain't shit. Talking about good women. I think men get us fucked up sometimes. And y'all get us fucked up sometimes. We really don't ask for a lot.

We ask for a little bit of attention. And we give you a motherfucking attention. No, a lot of y'all don't, though. I give it to you. I'm working. I ain't got time to be attention all the time. But we asking for attention. You can just text us back sometimes.

Okay, who is these niggas you fucking with? I do all of that. Do you? Yo, there is not a woman that I've dated that can say I was a fucked up person to them. Not one single bitch can say that. They could say I was like, he got a little shit with him. You know what I mean?

That little shit. I gotta deal with this and this. I ain't saying I'm perfect or whatever, but I've never, ever treated, let me correct myself, intentionally. There we go. There we go.

So the guys I've dated, I know they're not intentionally doing it so I've been trying to figure out what's wrong with y'all's minds sometimes what like no I know that the guys haven't hurt me intentionally

are you the same person are you do you continue to be the same person because this is a known fact that we send our represent represent representatives

out first I'm always the same person I can't believe that I'm always the same person and your pussy is fire too right that's what I heard the streets that's what I couldn't believe that. I'm always the same person. And your pussy is fire too, right? That's what I heard. The streets? That's what I heard.

Okay. But I just don't understand this. I just don't understand this of what ain't shit means. You know what I'm saying? Like, we try. Maybe. So it's not good for. We put trust.

I know other women. I haven't dealt with this. So women won't give a guy. Women won't just be cool with he's trying women won't be cool with 100 he has good intent 100 we have we will we we give so much um leeway for men if we see them trying we'd see them have good intent but if it's always like the same thing but what about the bitch enough what about the chick that is never enough? There are those women, and you shouldn't fuck with them.

Right. There are those women. So why do you find out these? Do you think you're a bad judge of character when it comes to men, or are you a person that likes? I feel like you like to be in love. I do. I mean, queens. Recently, yeah.

Some queens, they queens, they queens. Some queens like to be in love or don't. Yeah. No, I want to be in love or yeah like no i i want to be in love again i do um yeah what was your question no i said uh are you a bad judge of character because i do how does it go from all these not all these it's a case with anybody in life it goes for oh this month a dis of the shit's like how's like I am a bad judge like okay the character

and the men I've dated they're all good men you've met my ex-husband and I dated a lot of men just like him but you be going for the big dicks all the time right

no that's not it why'd you laugh because that's hilarious that you just came out and just said that I mean what's the show is this a joke me too soon

but never be too soon Stephanie my problem is I choose some women like Nick Jones Some women like Nick Jones. Some women like Nick Jones. You think I need that? Oh, no, that's right.

Let me play my dog. Don't give it to her. Go ahead. Go ahead. I choose the same type of men, and that's my fault. They're always good men. They're honest. They're trustworthy.

But they don't also have these other components that I need for me. Do you think you have a type? I definitely have a type. You do? I don't have a type. I ain't got no type. I don't have no type. I think it's what moves me for different reasons.

You know what I'm saying? It's what moves, and it really is like. You mean look-wise or personality? I'm like, no matter what. All of that. I'm talking about all of that. Personality-wise, I date pretty much the same kind of guys. Look-wise, I don't have to tell you.

I'm all over the place. But the quality that I like, I like motivating women. I like people that inspire. And I think on my deity side, hey deity, I like to do for women. You know what I'm saying? I like to inspire. I like to motivate. I like to get you excited about something. You know what I mean?

I found a relationship that I've been into or my interests have been, this may sound crazy, but I've been attracted to people that, I know this sounds so old school. They need you. No, not need me, but that I really like. So old school. Yeah, that's old school. You like the bitch?

Wait, you like somebody? I thought you just needed her to be a bad bitch. You know, I thought you thought, no, like somebody. That quality is something that excites my chakra. You know what I mean? Like another thing, like working with people, you know, getting excited about the same thing, learning something, you know, and building towards something.

Like, I don't think I could be with someone that I don't feel like I could partner and work with on something, whether that be something just for creative stimulation, whether that be something for financial gain. But I feel like that I have to partner up with someone that kind of like walks the way I walk. And just because eventually fucking and all that type of shit, it's going to get old. And if it don't get old, then your brain is all fucking too hard. You know what I'm saying?

Like, I know people that really, I still know buffers that really think about pussy all the time. Like, all the time. Yeah, those ones you don't trust. The women can't trust out there in the streets. Those are the ones you can't hang out with. You know what I mean? Them motherfuckers. I'm like this, yo.

Calm down. I'm like this. What in what 20 years how old are you now not to say that I don't get excited or what needs to be fulfilled but I guess when

you get really into something inspired and motivated by something something gets you going you don't that is not big of a deal. It's like a celebration to want to be like, do you want to fuck all the time? Nah, I don't ever sell.

I'd rather close this deal and fuck off the happiness off of that. Can we get some incentive? Yeah, but you can't really talk to women, or me, about the 35 to 45-year-old women. We're like teenage boys when it comes to that. So we need that too. You keep talking about that.

Is that really? It's horrible. Really? Yeah. I wonder why. It's just hormones. It's hormones. Oh, yeah.

God did a good job with that. Can you imagine if they lined up at the same time? Yo, he like, yeah, let's make this bitch want to fuck with the kids going to college. Yeah. Yo, God like this. Oh, you want to make her horny now? Uh-uh. She got the kids at home.

We got all these recitals and shit. Like, we're gonna wait yo your fucking middle-aged chicks boy that last kid go to college go to high school go to college pussy be wet it all makes sense looking at him like oh yeah because you can't be walking around with a wop and you gotta be a soccer mom and with a wop watching the coaches one by you're like yeah like, I'm going to suck your dick as soon as I take Marion to soccer practice. Oh, that makes so sense.

And God make us the most horniest when we the youngest. But it sucks that it doesn't align. Right. So that I just got to find the young men. Yeah. But then they don't give you what I need. I know you're in a tricky situation. What do you do?

What do you do? What do I do guys? All right. Ladies and gentlemen, this look, look. All right. What is it?

Let's just see. Let's see. I need something. Let's see. I need something. Let's see. Newsflash. This is Negro Radio. I have Nikki beside me. She's going to say, and I think some women agree with this, what do you need from a man?

That's just it? Squash it. Attention, sex, honesty. God damn. Youash it. Attention, sex, honesty. Goddamn, you want a whole list of shit, man. Three things? Attention, honesty. God! What else?

God, I give up. I give up. Oh, okay, let's talk about honesty. First thing, what you're never going to get, and this is what you girls need to just give up, you're never going to get a motherfucker. is what you girls need to just give up. You're never going to get a motherfucker. This is where you're going to get up. You need to give up on.

You're never going to get 100% pure honesty. You'll get enough to not get your feelings hurt. And if you're looking, damn, boy, I feel like I embodied Kevin Samuels right now. I know. Oh my God, he just, I'm saying, looking for a

perfect motherfucker to get all the shit she talking about and think him to be 100% honest, 100% loyal is 100% loyal. Is. A foolish thought.

With that said. Not to say that he has to act on it. But a man instinct to want to do something. Will never stop. It doesn't matter how good. Your pussy is. One of my mentors in comedy, Andy Evans from Washington, he said, Donnell, your career starts taking off when you don't be tripping off the pussy. And you can walk away from the pussy, everything. pussy everything he said because at the end of the day no pussy is going to be better than new

pussy don't matter how far you think your shit is oh shit he just what what you think yours get the wettest you think really think yours get the tightest that's just like me thinking I have the biggest dick that's me thinking all that shit it's it's I'm never gonna nobody's ever gonna have the biggest dick

and a nigga that got the biggest dick in the world ain't getting no pussy how do we get to the sex thing out of honesty so you're saying that all men are gonna go out and just go for the new pussy

no I'm not saying that for this what I'm saying for all the things that you want like these motherfucking chicks have a whole list of shit. He needs this. He needs to be six foot tall.

He needs to wear suits. He needs to be a six figure nigga. He needs to be able to dress. He needs to open the door. He needs to do this. I do love a door open. Shivery. He needs this.

And the nigga got all them checks. And you think that he gonna take all of, the nigga that want all of those checks? Every one? And just put it on one check? checks and you think that he gonna take all of the negative what all of those checks everyone and just put it on one check you get a check you get a check everybody gets a check well i'm just gonna be single then well you are gonna be single with that like billionaire niggas big dick all that type of shit all that i don't have I gave you three things that I think are very doable. So what are they again?

Attention. Right. Honesty. Hey, man, can I get a piece of paper? Oh, you said pay attention. Go ahead. Go ahead. Go ahead and say it.

I forgot what the last one was already. It was part of the joke, nigga. She said attention, then I wasn't paying attention. Exactly. And I'm looking, too. It didn't work, Donnell. All of it. What I'm just saying. It didn't work, Danielle. All of it. I feel like mine's not that.

It's very normal for most women to want what I want. There are the ones that want that extra list and stuff. But I don't need a six-foot dude. Most of my exes are a little shorter. My packages come in. I'm open to different packages. You know what's so funny about the guy? I make fun of him.

I make fun of him, but they have different opinions. Kevin Samuels. Here's the thing. You said, listen, this is so clutch right now. Listen, here's the clutch. You said, this is what you said. You want, what was it? Honesty was one of them, right?

Yeah. But when a nigga give a motherfucker full honesty, they don't want to hear that. I'm okay with it. No. The ones where we've had conversations. I like talking. I like conversations.

And if you're looking at somebody, let's talk about it. You know what? A lot of women were upset with Kevin Samuel about some truths that he said. I think it's unfortunate to wish death on somebody you'd be that so upset with somebody that you like uh celebrate in their death that's evil no one's celebrating no sometimes what goes around yeah but the fact that you like this yeah that's what he get for talking on the shit that's some whack that's some fucked up shit fuck out of here with that shit point i'm making is that the plot of motherfuckers first off sometimes motherfuckers don't like when you talk to them matter of fact you know that some people only operate off of well he said when he says well okay i asked you a question so what do

you bring to the table when you use it what do you bring to the table so you want this like i said you want this this this this this this this, this, this, this, this. Okay, and on his side, what he wants, and you don't want to do any of that. You don't want to. That's true. That's not fair. Absolutely, you're right. And he was 100% right when he said,

you change the level or the type of motherfuckers you can date. It's period. You see it all the time. You see motherfucker uh with a certain type of face or whatever like and this motherfucker chick is beautiful right and this is the first thing people say is like oh not knowing his personality anything oh what is it about him oh he must got money he must got a big dick and in a lot of cases that is true too like yeah 98% of the time

yeah but it's like this what level do you think you should operate it's okay to want the baddest dude the most successful dude and all that type shit

but then on that meet me halfway why don't you meet me halfway and why don't you level up and everything that you want me to do, the things that you want me to focus on? What about you focus on those things for yourself?

Yeah. Reciprocation was 100% needed in any relationship. Yeah. It should go both ways. You know why people break up? Why? Because they're not supposed to be together. Absolutely.

Yeah. I know that sounds crazy. Yeah. I mean, you're right. I was about to say sometimes someone's ready in a certain situation and somebody's not there yet but that's the same thing usually you just

the mental's not there at the same time when I first started doing comedy I was dating this chick at the time and she was older than me and she was probably been in and out of relationships like oh she probably went through a big dick phase and all that type of shit you know

and um then she dated me i'm younger and she just went what older women will hit you with some shit she said Donnell if you ever get to a point where this isn't what you want just let me know absolutely and she said I just don't want the games I love that and then look I knew I started playing the game just by that

because she said this is I'm a game player. She said, I just don't want the game. And my ass said, what games? I knew all the games she was talking about. I played them all. I knew I'm a game player. Because I act like this. I did like this too, nigga.

I did like this. What games? Game. Game. Game. Football. TNT. What you talking about? I knew I'm a game player because I act like this I did like this too nigga I did like this what game game football what you talking about what game and then she knew I knew the games why

she was talking about the game and then she did then she did like this she said you know the games and I was like yeah I do and I was like this yeah, I do. And I was like this.

Yeah. Damn, that was real. I said, you know what? I'm not going to play no games. I know what you did. Game started. A little game. I didn't play a big game.

It was a little game. It was a little game. I didn't do the game game like Super Bowl. It was like baseball. It was first week. First week of baseball. You don't think nobody's paying attention to the game. That's the thing with being an older woman.

We just rather the communication. If you're out, then just let us know. We move on. We're not holding on like we used to back in the day. But I will say this. I will say this. I felt the game's move on. Like, we're not holding on like we used to back in the day. But I will say this. I will say this. I felt the games coming on. And I said, yeah.

I don't. I'm about to play games. But I know I said I don't want the games because I knew I was about to play games. But not just that. I knew for me it was a transition. I was just leaving D.C., going to New York, and it was a distance. You can't put too much distance between me before I start saying,

Hey, hey, hey. It was New York to D.C. But I knew that I was just like, it just wasn't going to be, it wasn't going to work. And not that I didn't love her or care about her, but I didn't know how, to what extent do I love enough to be able to like compromise. Walk away from stuff. You know what I'm saying? And then I just didn't want to hurt any feelings and probably didn't want to get my feelings hurt. And I just said it's better for us just to keep it moving. And I was in New York.

She was in D.C. I ain't had no business in New York. It was tough. You had to start all over? Yeah, I ain't know. Starting over? Like, you go from having a rack yo i'm just being honest nobody love me i can say what the i feel

you beat me up today i'm scored i'm scoring he's me up today. He's got a lot on his mind. Listen, to go from a rack of bitches to no bitches, ooh, that'll stress you out. You have to start dating again, spending all that money. No, I didn't do that. You know what I did? What? I bust bitches in. Oh, yeah.

You did tell me about that. I bust them, son. I bust them. You want to see New York? I didn't fly up, nigga. I bust them. That fucking Peter Pan got me through it, nigga. Fucking $19. I bust them. That fucking Peter Pan got me through it, nigga. Fucking $19.

I bust them. And they came. They had a good time. And I ain't had shit. And they used to come see me. I didn't have shit. But what I had was the nigga left. You know what I mean?

Like, he left. He got out. So that put you on a higher. When I started, like, you don't feel that anymore now because you can make it kind of anywhere now. Like any state or whatever, right? But that was a big deal. Like being from D.C. and leaving. Like everybody at some point, any comedian that's hiding in D.C., at some point they had the city on lock.

They did everything you could do. Comedy clubs, cabarets, Budweiser Superfest, whatever. But then after a while, you're just paddling. It's the same shit. And it wasn't until nobody really took you serious until you left. But listen. Until you left. But the thing is, the women took you seriously.

We're going back to what I was saying before. Women will put up with a lot of shit. Fuck you, listen. Until you left. But the thing is, the women took you seriously when you, we're going back to what I was saying before. Women will put up with a lot of shit. Fuck you nigga, fuck you bitch. Women will put up with a lot of shit.

Like, I don't even think it's because you left. It's because they liked you and that's why they took that $10, $19 Peter Pan. You're like,

I'm on this motherfucking bus. No, whatever. No, no, I think they like him. No, I think they like me,

but it was still something excited exciting about the nigga left and went to new york you know i mean it was like that was just like right now you can't you can't tell because with tiktok social media and everything you can really make yourself a star anywhere yeah you know i'm saying real talk i think they were just supporting you and like he needs me there in New York. I'm going to go see him. Yeah, but here's the thing. They were excited. They were excited that I left.

To see you. No, not to see me. Them bitches didn't really care about me. No, they liked me, but they was excited that, oh shit, he's doing it. Because like so many, so many guys in D.C. that just never left. And all the smaller, well, D.C. is not a small town, but a lot of small towns in general, it's hard for people to get out. It's hard to be seen.

The point I'm making is, like, it was something that was attractive about, he left. And I'm going to tell you, I left. This is so crazy. Because people see me have a certain amount of success now. And to be quite honest, I'm on fire right now you are i'm on smoke i mean i got and this is not this is not me being a braggart or anything it's just like 30 years feels like it's coming together in the last two years and i've had a certain level of

success financially creative whatever but, I don't know. It's a groove you get when you feel like something is about to happen. It's your time. You know, like Dave says, like, you're going through. It's like you hit outer space, and it's just like. It's just like. Hit that turbulence. Yeah.

It's floating. And I'm so happy about where i am but also know and this is for anybody doing anything you have to make the first step you have to make this first step you can't continue to talk about shit you can't continue to make excuses put it into motion you know i'm saying and i'm not i'm not saying i have you saying I have people in my life that have come to me and they know that I could help in a certain situation. Right? To the

extent of, I'm saying, boom. There you go. Can you do? I'm saying, boom. There you go. To the point like a lot of people start walking away from them and then they'll say something like man family is crazy family um a family member said to them that's not my problem

and it's the truth your problem is not my problem you know i'm saying everybody knows the problem what's the solution? That's how I look at life, period. Like, I don't like people that bitch. What you bitch about? What you going to do about it? Yeah. You have one time to complain to me about something.

The second one is like, how are you fixing it? Right. I'll help you. And let's keep it moving. But people don't acknowledge the road you took, taking that first step, never looking back, never giving yourself a plan B, and just going straight forward. And part of that first step, people,

is just you could be working your job that you have. If you have this dream of starting a fashion, just start drawing. Start your business. Get your LLC. Start doing something. Go get your LLC. Just those just do that. Start your business. Get your LLC. Start doing something. Go get your LLC. Just those little things.

Stop talking about shit. Be about it. Stop talking about shit. And here's the thing. You got people that talk about it and be about it. And if, everybody's not going to be about it, right? But if you're not going to be about it, stop talking about it.

That's it. That's true. If you're not going to be about that life, about it that's it that's no if you're not going to be about that life stop saying you're about that life until something happens where you show you about that life yeah because after a while i'd be like okay whatever okay all right so you're ready to go eat i'm ready to go do something i'll give you an example about that life there's a lot of people that work these jobs and go to jobs and shit, right? And they be like this, man, the next motherfucker, the next motherfucker to say something to me, I'm going to tear their ass up.

I wish a motherfucker would. There are people that go to work like that. There are people that get dressed up, put on a tie up. And there's people that work at airports. They go up to people with the notion that I'm going to slap you. And then they get the dog shit beat out of them and then here's something you're not going to believe

they want more they want more and the dude was trying not to hit him in the first place he wants more not like I'm going to give you some more did everybody see what just happened this nigga was in a luggage rack and the conveyor Not like, I'm going to give you some more. Like, did everybody see what just happened? This nigga was in a luggage rack, and the conveyor belt was about to do,

and throughout that, this guy, he wants more. Yo, the way he did it, like, witnesses. Are you guys, did anybody see this? Let's go to the videotape. Boot, block, book up, DC. Black up, black up. He wants more yo I've seen some yo

I've seen some people get fucked up right he fucked himself up too but I'm going to tell you something I respect niggas that have commentary where they fucking you up.

Like I grew up, all you hear was like, I hate that nigga, this was a commentary, I hate that nigga, I hate that nigga, black out, whip. But this motherfucker straight up engaged the audience, acknowledged what he just did. He was like, and the way it wasn't, yo, the way he moved, people say he had hands.

He didn't have hands as much as he had feet. Any boxer, you see his footwork, and like his footwork, and come to find out, he was in the NFL. He's playing football. If you see, he a cornerback. I thought he would be a wide receiver. Quarterback. But if you look at the video, okay, we'll do the video right now. We're going to slow it down right now. Here's the hands.

More importantly, look how he continues to make eye contact. His body is straight and he's moving his feet. And he didn't cross his feet. He did like a... Right? So I understand that it's important to acknowledge the hands. But those feet kept him up.

And that dude kept him up. And it was like he wanted more. The only time I've heard more, they had more of an impact on how I took it. It was Oliver, whatever that joint was, when the motherfucker's an orphan. And, please. was Oliver, whatever that joint was, when the motherfucker's an orphan, and, please. Look, he said, that's what,

the NFL dude, and the other dude, this other dude, the big dude, Arab looking dude, whatever, Muslim looking nigga, beardy nigga, whatever. It sounded like he made it sounded like he was like this. Please, sir. Can I have some more?

More! He wants more! Why you keep telling me to shut up, son? More. He wants more. This guy here saw to me, and he wants more. Can you imagine if it turned into a grease? Give me more, give me more.

Is that what you looking for? More. More. Let's do things with more in it. More more more How do you like it How do you like it He wants You keep doing that part

More more more Did y'all see He wants more How do you like it How do you like it He wants more More more more How do you like it

He wants How do you like it He wants more More more more He How do you like it How do you like it He wants more More more, more, more. He wants more. More, more, more. Did you see this?

Keep going. More, more, more. He wants more. More, more, more. He's asking for more. More, more, more. Jesus Christ, he wants. More, more, more.

He wants. More, more, more. He got. More, more, more. Blip, blop, blop. More, more, more. He got more, more, more. Blip, blop, blop. More, more, more. Mick, Mick, Mick, Mick, Mick. More, more, more.

He wants more, more, more. Wants more. More, more, more. Nigga want more. More. We're stupid. How do you like it? How do you like it?

More, more, more. I do want to say this. Our podcast is a podcast you never know where it's going to go. It's like the Jerry Seinfeld podcast. It's the show about nothing. When we first started this, we were talking about Yellow Springs. We were talking about Donnell Land. With that said, I have to take this opportunity to thank everybody. We're responsible for making this a successful weekend. I want to thank Elizabeth Wade. I want to thank everybody responsible for making this a successful weekend.

I want to thank Elizabeth Wade. I want to thank Heather Stewart. I want to thank Nikki McElroy. I want to thank Samson. I want to thank Latoya. I want to thank Julius. I want to thank Ted. I want to thank Andrea over at Avis.

I want to thank Erica at Wiley's. I want to thank Dave Chappelle for inspiring the whole idea of bringing summer fun to Yellow Springs. I want to thank Susie with all the rentals. I want to thank everybody that gave us an Airbnb. I want to thank the Yellow Springs Motel. I want to thank

Lily's. I want to thank, I did say Ted's, Birchbark Canary. Who else? I want to thank Lily's. I want to thank, I did say Ted's, Birch Bark Canary. Who else? I want to thank, I got to thank, I want to thank my man 40. I want to thank Marsha. I want to thank Lisa. I want to thank, who else do I want to thank?

Everybody. Who else do I want to thank? I thank Julius. I want to thank my son. He's super excited. I want to thank all of my family that did everything to bring everybody together in one place and to have a good time i want to thank uh yellow springs newspaper 10239 or whatever the fuck that is i want to thank um all the press that dayton was nice

enough to give me we're not trying to involve me with any politics of Yellow Springs only to know that this guy considers it second home and he loves it I want to thank I feel like I need to thank somebody else Sound I'm not thanking Samson for the sound because if he fucked up niggas be like I heard all the things

in my right ear I want to thank Elaine Chappelle for being the I heard all the things in my right ear. I want to thank Elaine Chappelle for being the, uh, hello. Where's it go? All right. Can you,

I'm still wrong. I want to thank Elaine Chappelle, um, for the inspiration to start wanting to be a counselor. Uh, just everybody, man, Donnell land. Are we doing it big in yellow Springs?

Um, I really feel like this is going to grow uh monster monster beverages.com uh laurie jonas my publicist who fucking went above and beyond to get me every type of publication uh uh date in that area had to offer one thing about thank a lot of people you still feel like you're going to forget somebody and if I forgot somebody it's not that I'm not thankful

it's just that I forgot for the moment so if you contribute to make a Donnell Land successful you participate if you bought a ticket if you did anything

I thank you and I want to thank Angela Yee and Talib I thank you. And I want to thank Angela Yee and Talib Khali, if they even showed up. They'll be there. Look at God. That's right.

A joke can be too soon, but it never can be too soon. For Funny Observations, it's Donald Rollins. This is Nicky. Thank you. Love ya. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye. Thank you. you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you