Donnell - Who Run The World? Girls!!!

Episode Date: February 24, 2020

Who run the world? GIRLS!!! And here's why.... they're edgy.... they're tenacious.... they're creative.... they're beautiful.... they're talented... they're GIRLS!!! In episode #013, the first live podcast, Donnell shares the magic he saw in Esther Ku, Jivanta Roberts and Annie Lederman when they first met and the evolution since. From stage debuts to moments of silence, watch, see and be inspired. It’s raw, it’s uncut and it’s real. A joke could be too soon, but it can never be too soon for a funny observation. Special thanks to @annielederman, @estherkuku, @jivantaroberts, @hollywoodimprov, @mfdaviddeery, @juliuslikeaboss, @aarontheartist, @thelifeofkay, @samsoncrouppen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

All right, listen everybody, I know who y'all came to see. You seen them on Chappelle's show. You just watched them on Netflix, The Degenerates. You watched them kill them on Nekin' Friends on Showtime. Hollywood Improv, I need y'all to start making some noise right now. Start making some noise right now. Russia, start making some noise!

Make some noise. Make some noise, everybody. Give it up for Donnell Rollins, everybody! Thank you. What's up, everybody? How y'all doing? Thanks for coming out to my first podcast. Thanks for the Russians coming in. Appreciate you. Psych don't trust Russians like that. Y'all got too many secrets. Russian bitches will suck your dick

and save the nut. Russian bitch will suck your dick. I am keeping secret in my mouth. It is secret in my mouth. It is good, yes? Yes, it is, Russian bitch. Is that racist? Fuck it. Sometimes racism can be funny.

I'm about to tell y'all a racist experience. I know this is fucked up. All right, first off, this coronavirus got me fucked up. Not literally, but my dumbass niggas like, nigga, I don't want to drink corona, but my dumbass niggas like, nigga, I don't want to drink Corona no more. Wow, niggas getting sick off their shit. But I was at the LAX airport the other day, right?

I was at an international terminal, right? And it was a group of Chinese niggas. I don't know what type of Chinese niggas they was. They could have been of Chinese niggas. I don't know what type of Chinese niggas they was. They could have been Japanese Chinese niggas. They could have been Korean Chinese niggas. They was Chinese niggas. That's how I look at them. I don't know what type of Chinese nigga you are, nigga.

I know you a Chinese nigga, son. And I know this is fucked up, and I got to get my life together, right? But I was walking past them, right? It was a whole bunch, like, 30 Chinese niggas, right? And I did like this. Huh! Is that racist?

I held my breath. I was like... Some people say that that joke was too soon. Now listen, I believe in some cases... I'm a comedian 25 years. I believe in some cases a joke could be too soon. But somebody that's been doing comedy for 25 years, I don't think it ever could be too soon for a funny observation.

And I've been the king of too soon for fucking all my goddamn career. I even got a throwback too soon. Some people didn't really appreciate this video, but I did it anyway because I was trying to encourage motherfuckers to not get yourself into certain situations.

So for everybody sitting here tonight, I thank y'all for coming out tonight. This is the Don Air Rollins Show. Anybody subscribe to this channel, I appreciate it. If you don't subscribe, make sure you subscribe. I'm not saying I'm a professional. I'm not saying I'm Joe Rogan. What I'm saying is I'm a person that's got a voice. And what I understand is people want to hear it.

So I'm going to continue to get y'all to Don Air Rollins' show. Give yourself a round of applause. And this was me too soon, fucking 10 years ago. Thank you. Hello. Are you a victim of domestic violence? But let me tell you, don't get yoked. Hello. Are you a victim of domestic violence? Or do you know someone in a physically abusive relationship? If so, you are not alone.

Every day, millions of women around the world are punched, bruised, and battered by some punk-ass loser with control issues. In light of the controversy surrounding Chris Brown's alleged attack on Rihanna, gossip sites rumor that his defense is he didn't choke her, he yoked her. To be yoked is to be grabbed or pulled in a jerk-like manner by the neck or arm, causing a whiplash-like motion. We believe that domestic violence against women can never be justified. However, there are preventative measures that can be taken to avoid getting yoked.

The following testimonials illustrate this point. I didn't even know what a yoke was until I got yoked, and that was very painful. I said, look, you can't be a real man if you ain't about more than three inches. And he came at me real hard. Then I took $1,000 off his dresser. I slept with his best friend, and I put that stuff up on Facebook. That was my status.

I sucked your best friend's. And we had dinner. What would I say for women to not be young? Shut the up. Because men are violent, yo. Real violent. Don't ever tell a man he's not a man. Also, there's certain looks that you can't give a man. Like, you can never look at a man like, but I'll f*** you up because you will get yoked. Why I think

Rihanna may have gotten yoked is because she doesn't know when to shut her mouth. She got a big mouth. You could see it in her last video. There's certain things you can't say to a man and Rihanna just, she lost consciousness. I think there's a lot of women who think they're stronger than men. Like I slapped my man upside the head a couple of times, about ten times. I just, I couldn't control myself. You know, and after a while, he couldn't control himself either.

I think a man can yoke you into a natural hairstyle. I used to be straight, and now I'm nappy. You don't try to yoke somebody because I don't even get dinner ready. because I didn't get dinner right. I like to have a good time. I like to party and do that type of. Hello? Hey, girl!

Hell yeah. All right, okay, I'm there. his dinner. I'm gonna have a good time. I'm a single lady. I'm a single lady. I'm a single lady. I'm a single lady.

What you doing, old lady? . Hi, I know you single lady, I'm a single lady What you doing on my leg? Hi, I know you know me as the sleep girl but I too once got yoked in Korean 이렇게 조금 자지 있어요 나는 이렇게 조금 좋다 And this guy, my boyfriend, was like, Don't do this!

Hey, what are you doing? Like this, you're... Oh, no, no, no! Oh, no, no, no! What are you doing? Don't do this! Don't do this! Though we give these examples to help reduce the occurrence of domestic violence?

The motto remains the same. Yoke me once, shame on you. Yoke me twice, shame on f***ing you. Don't get yoked. Yoko-nen haji-mayo. Please. Yo, that twerk win? Yo, no, let me understand. Like, I mean, that twerk win?

It's fake beef. It's plant-based. You don't know about black guys? You've never been in a car and smoked? Black guys? No, not black guys. How about that? Black guys.

Oh, son! Drop a beat. Drop a beat. Drop a bomb on that. The Donnell Rawlings Show, live in your face. Fuck that bitch ass nigga. You'll never take my place, nigga Thank you. Yeah! One, two.

Yo, first off, I want to thank y'all for coming. This is the first tape of the Donnell Rawlings show. And as I said earlier, I know it jokes too soon. That video, I did that video like, how long ago was that? 11 years ago. 11 years ago. And everybody thought I was fucking off the chain and crazy for doing it

then and they still feel the same way. But I did a podcast a while ago and it was called Donnell Rawlins. It was called Mans and Them. And it was basically me connecting with some guys in my life that I thought was my mans as motherfucker, ride or die, day one motherfuckers.

And I'm a man, man. Some people consider me to be like, what's that word? Gay? Toxic. The opposite, toxic. What is it, toxic? Toxic masculinity. Why you got to be so strong when you fucking say toxic masculinity?

Well, people say, would I be a toxic masculine motherfucker? Yes, that's how I met you. You were toxic to me. What? We were at Stand Up New York and you came up and grabbed my ass. Wait a minute. Did you? Because you couldn't wait to tell the story?

You did yell at me. No, you know how somebody. You yelled at me. No, listen. You know how somebody. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Listen, you know how somebody got You yelled at me. No, listen. You know how somebody... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Listen, you know how somebody got a beef with you

and you think they cool with you and then you say something and they're like, ooh, I was waiting for this shit. I thought this was your R. Kelly documentary and we were telling our Me Too story.

No, first off, first off, I only want to give you my opinion on the R. Kelly documentary shit because I felt sorry for them bitches on the first season, but the second season, bitch, don't opinion on the R. Kelly documentary shit, because I felt sorry for them bitches on the first season,

but the second season, bitch, don't go to the studio. You can't get peed on if you don't go to the studio. You on Surviving R. Kelly again? Go to church, bitch.

So, when you first... Alright, I wanted to do the introduction. First off, I'm So, when you first... Alright, I wanted to do the introduction. First off, I'm excited because we just did that video years ago. And the three ladies that are on this panel, whatever you want to call it right now, I don't call them my mansons and them, they're my bitches and them. I mean, in a very positive way.

In the most positive way you can say the word bitch. Like, that's a bad bitch. That's what I mean by that. Not the way Snoop Dogg talked about Gayle King. Oh! That was a different bitch! He called her a type of bitch. I didn't even know it existed.

Dog face, Purina cat child ass bitch. Long face ass bitch. I was like, you can't talk about Oprah Friend like that. Because I didn't know her name was Gayle King for 10 years. I just said, that bitch Oprah Friend. So when you first, oh, this is what I was going to say. These young ladies right here, right now,

I love all of them for different reasons. And nothing that you perverts would think. But only because I met Javante years ago. She was a VJ. Was it a VJ? Yeah, VJ. He was a VJ. You know how long it goes when I wasn't even a job.

Fuck is a VJ. That bitch was a vagina jockey, nigga. She was selling pussy. That's what they call her. No. Video jockey. Video jockey. A video jockey.

I forget the name of it, but whatever. I met her. Not whatever dismissiveive they call them cam girls now we're gonna get to your career in a second but i first met her and i seen her always trying to get into this business of acting producing she's been a dance for years probably tour with somered with some of the best what do you call it? Groups? Shakira. Shakira, Beyonce. She's out there. We met in New York on that event.

I was a big star and she was a nobody. Okay. And she was all on my dick. She was all on my dick. She was on my dick. She was on my dick, Sy. She was like, that's him. That is him. Look at him. His elbows, no, no, no. She was on my dick. No, no, no, no. She was on my dick, son. No, no, no, no. She was like, that's him. That is him.

That is him. Look at him. His elbows is ashy. That is him. She was on my dick, son. No. But I would have been Survivor R. Kelly if I tried. OK, she was like 19.

And now I'm 33. My mind's telling me no. Figuratively. And I seen her from New York, moved to L.A. She's still doing her thing. She's doing a lot of shit. Esther Koo, you want to tell your fucking story now? We interrupt this program for a special announcement.

The words, the lies, and the fabrication of this story Esther Koo is about to tell are all lies. In the world of Me Too, this could be dangerous and inspire other people to come out with their untrue stories. Now, back to your line. I was at Stand Up New York, just minding my own business. And then somebody... Wait a minute, wait a minute.

Oh, shit! No, no, go ahead, go ahead. And then somebody grabbed my ass and I turned around and... What? Wait a minute. Fuck that, son. Yo, that's like 15 years ago. This is the time you Me Too'd me. You were allowed to do that.

This was pre-Me Too. I didn't even know I was getting Me Too'd. I grabbed your ass? Yeah. What? I called Jason Steinberg and I was like, yeah, I met Donnell last night. He grabbed my ass.

What? And he just said, oh, yeah, he does that. Listen, he never, Donnell. Wait, wait, wait. I got to defend myself. Fuck that. Jason Steinberg, these are all lies. Jutan Clan ain't nothing to fuck with.

But I didn't grab her ass. How? Do you even see your ass? No, tell him why you don't tour with him anymore. Tell him, tell him. What? Oh, yeah. Wait a minute.

Okay, first off, did y'all talk, did y'all like pre-production before y'all came in? Did we gather our stories to come against you? Yes, Donna. Yes, women talk now. The bitches bark back. Yes. Oh, first off,

this is not fair because the name of this episode, I had two names this episode. Right? Two names of it. And you didn't like the first one. No. I said,

Donna Rawlings, the Donna Rawlings show. Asses he grabbed. Rob Markman, Ph.D.: And what was the ass? Gia Peppers, Ph.D.: It was the bitches. Rob Markman, Ph.D.: Right, okay, but I didn't mean it in a bad way. And then I said another one, and what did the other one say? Gia Peppers, Ph.D.: Who Run the World, girls.

Rob Markman, Ph.D.: So this is what I'm saying. I didn't want to put you guys in a bad way. And this was all my love for women and how powerful they were in the industry. And I said, I want to call it, I said, okay, who run the world girls? And then y'all just fucking attacked me.

That's what we do now. We're powerful now. Now? We have a voice. We got yoked and now we won't do it again. Can you tell him, tell him,

tell him why you don't toy with him. Well, there's more history to that. Wait a minute, what the fuck? You put me in your DVD. No, I didn't put you in my DVD.

And this is what I knew, Esther Koo was a real Korean, right? Because if you saw it on that, it said the bootleg comedy, right? And I had this idea of bootleg comedy. And bootleg comedy, the backstory of it was, it was comedy before the big lights. It's comedy before the shiny suits. It's comedy before you think you made it. It's like the grind spots, the grimy spots to open mic.

And I wanted to capture that, so I did this DVD, it was called Bool-Aid Comedy. Then I met Esther, and her background is in marketing, she wasn't even really on the fucking DVD. She was on the DVD laughing like, ha ha, nothing crazy. I said you should market a dildo, but an ashy one. You should sell black ashy dildos as part of your merch. And then she wondered why she got her ass grabbed.

What the fuck I'm supposed to do? But the thing was, so I had a cover, I had artwork, I had a cover for the DVD. And she wasn't really on the DVD. She did Photoshop before memes and shit, and she put on a boulet comedy featuring Esther Kuh, and she made herself bigger than everybody on that show. I was like, what the fuck you doing? I was like, oh, you Korean Korean.

I was making money at my show. Yeah, you was. You were a hustler. And then you said, I didn't even know this. I know Annie. Annie, you told me that. Yeah, it was. Fourth of July barbecue it was, I moved to New York. Fourth of July barbecue.

Yeah, I moved to New York to do comedy. Esther, I was staying on the couch of Esther's childhood friend, Paul Shin. He was like. No shit. He's black. Paul Shin. He's not Asian.

No, but they were childhood friends. And then he was like, like oh you want to do comedy my friend Esther is a comedian then Esther was like you should come to this party with me with Don L. Rollins

I was like who's that and she was like Ashley Lahren I was like who and no no no but I knew I was a fan

and then we went to the to the barbecue and you I had done like I had just quit drinking I had done like two open mics and you were like I know you would have for sure gotten your dick sucked but You, I had done like two, I had just quit drinking. I had done like two open mics.

And you were like, I know, you would have for sure gotten your dick sucked. But sorry, no more Jaeger. You met me like two weeks too late. But so Esther brought me to the party, 4th of July party. And too soon, too late. And then I was talking to a friend of yours, and he's like, you're funny.

Are you a comedian? And he goes, I go, yeah, I'm trying to do it. And then he goes to you, put her on your show, because you had just started doing mashup Mondays on Monday nights at, what was the club called? Laugh Lounge. Laugh Lounge on Essex. And you were like, come to my show, RIP.

You were like, come to my show. And I was like, I'm not ready. And you fucking humiliated me in front of everyone. How did I do that? You went like this. You went like this you went like you pretty much i think you said fuck you go hard or go home you're like that's so it was right no it was right you got me into you like flipped a switch and you say it's tough love yeah no the reason why because so many people it was good no because so many people me, I've mentored people before. Mentor.

Mentor. And I don't, I'm not saying. Mentor. He doesn't really like it. I'm not saying it in a bad way. No, he was never sexual. Never. Never.

I'm not saying it in a bad way. I just like to help people. And people always come up to me and they're like, yo, I want to do comedy and everything. And for somebody who hears it all the time, I'm like, all right, you want to do want to do comedy okay I'm gonna put you on right now right and then they start going up it up it up you know it's like up it up it up it up you know you I thought you said it like it was me I believe that I think anybody even in this audience right now and there's some people in here that probably thought about doing comedy whatever I'm not saying everybody will get to a certain amount of success with it but if you've had the idea of doing it i'm always going to encourage you to try it i'm not going to say i'm not going

to say you're going to be whack but i'm going to say yo motherfucker you never know yeah what are you going to not do it yeah what was that yeah what are you going to not do it but a lot of people do they go up to up to because you make us nervous because you're so funny. But that's not why I'm there to help you. I understand that. And I know I could be intimidated because I am nice with it. But what I'm saying is, hello, this is the truth. Nigga, I can't sing. But, nigga, let me get a stage.

No, but you gave me my shot, remember? I gave you a shot. Yeah, it was an audience. I want to finish. I want to explain what I was saying. So if somebody approaches me, and I look in their face, and they're like, oh, I really want to do it. I'm like, oh, if you really want to finish. I want to explain what I was saying. So if somebody approaches me and they even, and I look in their face and be like, oh, I really want to do it. I'm like, oh, if you really want to do it, I know it sounds weird.

People don't do this all the time. I'm like this, I'll give you the opportunity right then. I've had shows where it's like dope shows, dope lineup, and it'd be a motherfucker like, yo, man, I want to do it. I'm like, all right, you up next. Oh, but, oh, but, oh, but, oh. And the reason why I said that, because the reason why i said that because the reason why i said that because i've i've seen you before not you but a person like yourself like i want to do it and they kind of and as long as i've

been doing i don't have time to fuck with somebody's trying to get it together you know i'm saying if you're going to do it i'm like this do it motherfucker right now so i did that and you stepped up to it yeah no i came on i came on monday javanta was there with her but what did i say wait a minute you didn't finish it oh he goes he goes go hard or go home he's like if you're gonna say you do it do it like never do it you're like if steven spielberg comes up to you right now and is like i'm auditioning you for to play an app not me obviously that'd be blackface but to be an african like you're like i'm gonna do the accent i don't know the accent i'm gonna do it i'm gonna try you know but the interesting thing about you and it's i'm going to do the accent. I don't know the accent. I'm going to do it. I'm going to try, you know? But the interesting thing about you, and I'm very proud of you. And the reason why I'm saying that, because I saw you go from that stage as a fucking little bird in the nest.

Because when you first started, you weren't that good. I was so good. I'll tell you my first joke. Very cute. When I'm saying that, I'm not saying that in an insulting way. No, I know. I'm saying it in a way like, you were very deadpan. You were very sarcastic.

You were very dark. You know what I'm saying? And everything that I knew about you from just having conversations with you, I was like, man, this is what I said. Man, once this girl finds her voice, it's going to be off to the races. I was like, man, this is what I said. Man, once this girl finds her voice, it's going to be off to the races. I was like this. She's struggling right now because you've got to get used to having stage presence. There's a whole bunch of things.

You know, like what joke am I going to tell? Can I tell a joke if my father's in the audience or if he's not in the audience? And you've told some jokes with your father in the audience. And I was like, that's fucking too soon. It was fucked up. But with that said, I was like... I would never bring my dad to a show. You don't even like your dad.

What are you talking about? I brought my dad and my brother on stage and I was asking my dad if he liked me or my brother more. Like, shit, you let me do whatever I wanted. But my point is, and I'm trying to stay because I always interrupt. I'm trying to stay on topic. Is that I knew once you found your

voice it was gonna be crazy and then I think when you were just starting I moved to LA so I wasn't there to see your career like you growing because I was like this oh shit she's she's finally getting then I start seeing you pop up on on um uh on MTV or on Girl Code I start seeing you pop up on these fucking marquees and shit I was like oh shit the world finally saw what I saw and that's why even to this day whenever I see you on some shit I really get excited because I was like

I really saw it before everybody got it yeah I know you're my comedy papa you also once took and then you got brand new on me no we'll talk about that no he's so full of shit you're so full of shit but also you took my notes once i was like this is my third time doing comedy or whatever all my friends are in the audience i'm all excited i'm like nervous i'm

trying to like memorize my jokes you grab my notes you're like fuck you bitch i was like what no i said like you were like but you said something good you were like i was like but i'm gonna forget and you go that's when the good stuff comes, when you forget what you're going to say on stage. Yeah. And then I probably stood there silently staring at people sweating. You did, but I know some people get so married to like, everybody gets married to like, I'm writing jokes.

I'm writing jokes. I got these jokes. I got these jokes. But you can sell jokes or you can tell jokes. Yeah. And then like sometimes if you rely on your jokes too much, you forget why you were on stage in the first place. And the reason why you're on stage in the first place,

because you're a funny person. Even, that's what happens when people start getting really good, they don't have that youthful energy, like, oh my God, I'm falling off a cliff, anything could fucking happen. So I did that as a, I've done it to comedians before, they have this, this is my set list, I'm like, man, fuck that set list, nigga.

Go hard, go hard. Yeah, it's good. Yeah, because also it's, you're not in the moment when you're doing that. Yeah. Because you're thinking. Yeah. And Javanta. Oh my God, in the audience.

DJ Drastic. DJ Drastic. No, Javanta, she was like, she's a very attractive young lady. Thank you. Hottie. And like, to the point where, you know, some men would look at her and say, that bitch ain't got to do shit.

Is it too soon to say that? Some women, you look like, ah, she ain't never got to work. I'm more than my looks. But it was so funny because she was into the dance and the personality, being a personality in front of a camera. And she told me she wanted to do stand-up. And I was like, I don't know if that's going to work.

And I was, not that it's going to work, but I'm looking at her and I'm like, it's so, I know this is crazy, it's so hard for a pretty woman in comedy because a lot of times guys just look at you in a sexual way. Women be envious of you. But it was something

she really wanted to do. I was like, fuck it. She had her little joke pad and shit. I did. She did. She just cut in my house. We used to work out the notes and shit. And she had one set. First time she was on stage, it was like for four or five minutes. And it was, it was funny.

Yeah. Oh, it wasn't that funny. No, it was funny. No, it was funny. But I was like, oh man, the worst is when motherfuckers funny right out the gate. Yeah. Because they start getting cocky and shit. Yeah.

Yo, next week, right? The next one was tough. No, the next one was tough. No, the next week. The next one was like... The next week, and I told her, I told her, I said, I just want to tell you, it's not a good idea to go on stage

and talk about being pretty. That's not what I did, daughter. I said, it's not a good idea to talk about it because there's going to be a lot of unpretty bitches that are going to be like, bitch, you ain't all that. And they're going to be turned off, right? And she went on stage, and I don't know, I can't remember exactly how it happened, but she referenced pretty, and the audience was not having that shit.

And it's so funny, because if you know comedy, like when it's time for you to wrap up, they give you the light, letting you know, okay, it's time to wrap up, right? She got so nervous, they didn't even give her the light. She said, oh, they give me the light, I got to get out of here. I was done. She was like, oh, they give me the light, I got to get out of here. And it didn't work out well. I cried in the corner, I remember.

She cried in the corner. And I called my dad. Was Donna laughing while you were gone? Donna was like, no, you got to go hard or cried in the corner. I remember. She cried in the corner. I called my dad. Was Donna laughing while you were home? Donna was like, no, you gotta go hard or go home, son. Fuck it. But the reason, no, because I was just being honest.

She asked me. She was crying, right? I was crying. And then all the dudes upstairs that was trying to smash her. You know, dudes be like, oh, it's gonna be okay. Yo, them niggas like this, they know she was whack. They like, oh, it's gonna be all right. They wanna say quit, bitch, but goddamn like this, they know she was whacked. They like, oh, it's going to be all right. They want to say quit, bitch, but goddamn, this hand sucked.

They're like, it's going to be okay. She over there crying. She looked at me. She did like this. She said, she said, she said, what do you do when they're not laughing? I said, what do you do when they don't laugh? What do they do? What do you do when you don't laugh? What do you do? What do you do when you don't laugh?

And I said, I looked her in the face. I said, if you're crying right now, you should fucking quit. I told her, I was like, because this ain't the shit. And I quit. And she quit. But she was an editor too, but she quit. Her whole comedy career lasted nine minutes.

Nine minutes. No, I had a solid 15. No, you ain't had no fucking solid 15. You had nine minutes. She had nine minutes, and then she made a YouTube video saying snippets from my show. No, my friend did that. She said snippets.

My friend did that. She said snippets. No, it had snippets. I was like, bitch, that's your whole career. I had snippets from my show. No, my friend did that. She said snippets. My friend did that. She said snippets. No, it had snippets. I was like, bitch, that's your whole career. I had snippets. She was like, grand opening, grand closing. Her retirement video. She said snippets.

I was like, oh my God, she's out of control. I moved on to better things. How did we first meet? Oh, oh, oh, never mind. Oh yeah, it's inonan farrow's book yeah she's always she's always she's always no and then and then you brought me on the road with you but it was always like remember like we went to chicago and you were like pick me up at my hotel but i didn't have a car so

i had my dad pick you up in In a cab? Was it a cab? No, it was his Toyota Corolla. And my sister was with me, Poe. And she was in the car. But I was waiting for you in the inside lobby at the hotel. And you went outside. And you were like, oh, I thought that was you. I was racist?

No, you thought you were being racist. But you were like, I thought that was you and your dad. I go, that is my dad. Oh, yeah. I was like, yeah, it was some Chinese motherfuckers in the car. She was like, that's my fucking dad. And then you got in the back seat, and it was just really awkward. Because your dad don't speak English.

He does. You're just racist. No. He don't speak a lot of English. Was that, he didn't speak a lot of english was that wasn't he didn't speak a lot of english no he speaks but he reads the chicago tribune he probably knew that you grabbed his daughter's ass absolutely yeah and then you went between both the daughters grabbing both their asses in the back no and then we were i opened for you in philadelphia and you left me stranded without a hotel what i remember that i was there. What? I remember that.

I was there. I remember that. You remember that? And then we went to the last stop where Paul Mooney was playing, and I went up to Paul Mooney, like pretending I was in the audience. When I went up to him, I go, excuse me, hi, I'm here from New York doing a show with Donal,

but can I crash with you in your hotel? That's what you said, Paul Mooney? Yeah. You mean to Paul Mooney? And I know he said, absolutely not. I don't fuck with Chinese niggas, nigga. You Chinese nigga, I know you're going to bring up the coronavirus. Nigga, nigga, nigga, Chinese nigga.

Asian nigga, Korean nigga. Asian nigga, Asian nigga. Oh, my God. But I kept Esther Koo around me, even when she wasn't funny. She just got dope energy, man. She's like a fucking walking soundtrack. And she's so oblivious to what's going on around her when she's performing. She gets into her zone, and that's just it. I remember one time we were doing Short Caroline

and the set wasn't going well. Her last name is Kool, right? They were saying boo. She thought they were saying Kool. She was like, thank y'all, I gotta get out of here. Yo, they were like, Kool. She was like, thank you, thank. I got to get out of here. Yo, they were like, cool. She was like, thank you, thank you. No, I can't stay.

I got to get out of here, guys. I can't fucking stay. No. I got to go, guys. No, no, Donnell, I can't work for you no more. I can't. That's when we were friends, because we all have periods of time in our lives when you were mad at us.

No! You were mad at me for three years! Oh my God! Three years! Security! You call me Korean. You are Korean! But you hold bigger grudges and you speak Korean

according to your Wikipedia. I'm Korean. I'm Korean. I'm Korean. you speak Korean according to your Wikipedia. Hangul malo chokum, daega dokdokhae, aruso nuna shikara, ipdakja ima. Arusi ya! Aigo, chonmara, sekkin nomdara. First off, you're gonna have to have a different tone when you talk to me. Because I'm older than you. You can't look me in my face and speak Korean.

You better start bowing, bitch. You better be like, Arushi! you can't be like I'm older than you nah but Esther Kua is like she's dope she's dope and I'm gonna tell you something when I say

early I said sometimes where our job is more important and this was like she's always on joke time and shit she's always on joke time and shit. She's always on joke time. And I remember this night, we were at the Dime one night. And I was going, Dime is a spot in L.A. where you go work out and shit.

We were up there, and she was about to go on. And you caught me in the back, right? You caught me in the back, and you had this look on your face. I was like, what's wrong? And you said, I was like was like yo what the fuck and then you was like i just my mom just passed away you remember that night and i was like oh shit i felt so sorry for you and shit i'm telling you this is where like i don't know how to explain this. Like, true comedian stuff. She's like, mom just passed away, and she went on stage and performed.

I'm like, how the fuck do you do that? Because I wasn't close to my mom. Okay, that makes sense, but... She killed her mom, Donnell. She murdered her mom. Oh, man, I just was going Oprah interview. I was going Oprah interview. You were crying.

I'm like this. Yo, I just went Oprah, Gayle King, all the niggas. Doug, I was like, and then you were back there. Stop trying to make me cry. You're always trying to make me cry. You're always making me cry. No, you didn't cry one time. You always make me cry. All right, okay one. Rob Markman, Jr.: No, you didn't cry one time. That's what... Rob Markman, Jr.: But no, this is the point I'm saying. You always make me cry.

That's why... Rob Markman, Jr.: All right, okay. Whatever the... I didn't know... Whatever the relationship, it was strained or whatever. The fact that with something on your brain like that, to be able to go on stage... The minute you got off stage, you went back to wherever you was feeling. But I thought it was like, God damn, how the fuck you do that? And that's a real comedian because somebody... One of my mentors told me years ago, we all go through stuff.

Comedians, our job is to make people feel good. So when you go on a stage, you got to leave that shit on the side of the stage. You do your shit, come off stage, and you pick that back up

and you go to life. But I didn't know that. Well, my mom's the reason why I became a comedian because she's the funny one out of my parents. Right. That's why you had no,

you know, you and my dad were like, whatever. But my mom, if you met my mom, she was was hilarious. So that's where I got it from. You got what?

Being funny? Yeah. So your mother wasn't that funny? All right, if you want to make fun of me. Y'all going to start fucking with me now. Can I tell them why I didn't talk to you for a few years? Why? Because you got mad at me for something.

What? That I would make fun of you for. What? I can edit this. Why? Because you got mad at me for something. What? That I would make fun of you for. What? I can edit this. What? I'm like, dick size, dick size, dick size. I was like, dick size. Dick size, whatever you want to say.

Cut. It's going to be like this, Donna, you know why I smash you? Oh, I love you. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Can I have a drink, a two-dose of tonic? I'm feeling that kind of thing. Why? I'm ready for it.

Because, like, so you would always wear these shirts that, like, stop above your pants. And I would kind of, like, give you some, like, fashion tips. I'd be like, hey, Donnell, maybe you should, you know, you don't really have a big butt or a butt at all. No homo. I don't. Pause.

Maybe you should, like, wear a shirt that all. No homo. I don't. Pause. I don't. Maybe you should wear a shirt that covers the backside. Right. You got butt hurt? That's a lie. No black man from the hood is going to get mad because he don't got no ass. Thank you.

That don't make sense. That was fabricated. And then another time... I'm going to get some jeans like this. Cool. Look at my butt. Does it look good in here? I'm not with it. Y'all, it's fine.

No, but remember that other time you got mad at me when we were driving to the West Nyack Levity Live? And we were driving, and we were like, we're going to get some food on the way. And you were like, what kind of food do you want? And I was like, something healthy, right? But there was nothing but gas stations. So we stopped at a gas station like, you know, what can you find healthy at a gas station?

So I got excited when I saw fruit. There was a bowl of bananas on the counter. Do you know how offensive it is to tell a black guy there's a bowl of bananas on the counter? But I was just excited because we couldn't find any healthy food. Time out, bitch. You just called me a monkey. What? Yo, you see those bananas?

I grew up watching Roseanne. What do you want? Okay. So then I was like, oh my God, bananas. And then we turned a corner of the gas station. You gave me a dirty look. And then we turned a corner, and I go, oh my God, they have watermelon too. Did you hear all those groans? are some black people bitch yo you just told me you wonder why I'm upset she was in full blackface there's a tree full

of bananas and some watermelon Donnell you hungry no so then so then when we got to the hotel they had a bowl of apples on the counter at the Marriott. So since we were looking, so I don't look racist, I had to get excited about the apples. When we walked into the hotel, I was like, look, Donnell, a bowl of apples. Yeah, but you just, I wouldn't fuck with you. You went for bananas or watermelon.

I know that's a three-year time out right there. That's easily three years. Facts. Facts. But you're telling all this fucking shit. But you know, what you won't tell is like, that's the cool page.

She's very attractive, very sexy, and she just likes being sexy. And we were doing shows in La Jolla, right? And I was like, and then her stand-up, she's got a foul fucking blue mouth. And that's okay. But I don't, and then her stand-up, she's got a foul fucking blue mouth. And that's okay.

But for me, female comedians that only talk dick this and dick that, it just gets old to me for a while. I do butthole this and butthole that too now. Yeah, but that was the thing that was getting old to me. And I said to you, yo this is so funny. I was like, is that how you want people to see you? Is that all you want to talk about? She was like

well maybe that's it Donnell. She said it like she invited the me too to her. And I was like, I was against it but you know, what can you say nothing no but I feel like you're always an advocate for

changing the narrative for women in comedy 100% yeah cause I believe like I don't think like like there's no crutches you know what I'm saying like I see a female like I see a overweight comic, whatever. It's so easy, like, your whole routine is about being fat.

But we know you fat. Talk about something else. Even when I first started, I started in the Chitlin' Circuit. And the Chitlin' Circuit, the black circuit, nigga rooms, whatever you want to call it. And that's just, y'all ain't never heard of nigga night? I just made that term up. I'm the only person looking at it flying, they be like, Comedy blowout? Oh, Nigga Night.

Deaf comedy jam? Nigga, Nigga, Nigga Night. Y'all gonna be honest, if I'm gonna be honest, y'all gotta have honest fuckin' laughs, man. But I remember, um, and when I first moved from DC to be honest, y'all got to have honest fucking laughs, man. But I remember when I first moved from D.C. to New York, because I only was in the black comedy circuit, and I was crossing over doing the Main Street Rooms, and my first seven minutes, I had 10 minutes left, my first seven minutes was like, oh, I'm black, and I'm black, black, black, black, this.

And then Tony Woods looked at me one day, he said, man, when they say your name down there, they know you black. Fact. He was like, just be funny, and just be black later, nigga. And that's what I was saying about that. You don't even like being black.

You listen to Dave Matthews' band. That does not mean I don't like being black. That meant there was a period of time in my life where I was fucking a lot of white bitches. I remember it. I remember it. What? I remember it.

Shake me like a baby. I'm still Facebook friends with you. Feel what I feel. Know you have the answer. I'm Facebook friends you have the answer. I fucked that. It was, yeah. I'm Facebook friends with those bitches still. Really?

Yeah, one. Yeah. I love your man. When I went through my period. You know which one? That was a long time ago. When I went through my period of time, when I was wearing cowboy belt buckles and shit.

Wide leg jeans? Wide leg belt buckles. Yo, I know you didn't like them. I hated them. Oh my God. She was you didn't like them. I hated them. Oh my God. She was like this. Look, Black Sheik said, when you was wearing belt buckles

and belt buckles, I was like, ew. I was like, bitch, mission accomplished. Whatever. He made the dads like him too. Becky wanted me to hear it. Becky wanted to hear it. I want to run with you.

I was during this rocker for three years straight, nigga. They said, when did it happen? I was like, yesterday. I saw you standing there. And I want to run with you. What? Like, I never wanted to, like, prance you out on the sexual side or, like, you know, like,

oh, she's just a vixen type of shit. But, you know, with the Me Too movement and everything, what do women do? Because there's a group of women out there that aren't being represented. And those are the women that want to fuck themselves to the top. Yeah.

No, it's an avenue. It really is. Yo, what? And not that I support that. Or decline it when it's offered. I'm just saying, those women, they're upset that you're stifling their voice.

What do you say to the women that don't want to go to fucking acting school? That don't want to try? What about those women? Do they have a voice? I say keep gargling. Keep gagging and gag your way to the top. You don't have to have a voice? I say keep gargling. Keep gagging and gag your way to the top. You don't have to have a voice. You just fill it with a dick.

But are those women... It still exists. Are those women looked down upon now? By who? The women that don't want to do it. I have no clue. I don't... I have no clue.

I think it's all... I have no clue. It's to each its own, really. I feel like. It's whatever. If you want to... If you want to suck a row of dicks to the top, go for it.

All right, let's just do the math. I'm just saying it's like... Can we just do math? I think taking it away... Can we do math? All right. I know this is going to be just very, so there's a woman that likes to suck dick.

She just does it for fun. BBC. She might have 50 dicks under her belt. That's it. And then there's this one dick you can suck that can elevate your career. Do you go for the 50 for free?

Jesus. If you're already into it, listen, if you've already worked on that gadget. What is it? Quality over quantity. Okay. So for all the women out there that For all the young women out there that are trying to get into Hollywood. Don't do it. Hollywood

will fuck you up. Wait, can I just say something seriously though on this topic? Nothing serious on this part. People were crying fucking five minutes ago. Yeah, until we found out Ku didn't like her mother. I know. Listen, when you brought me into the bootleg, when you had me

doing Mashup Mondays, okay, it was 11 years ago. It was me, Ku, Javanta, there was our girl Lisa Sobel, there was Khalees you had on, you had Marina Franklin, you had so many women. I have no clue.

I mean, grabbing ass is like fucking nuts. I don't remember that story. Listen, you never tried to fuck me. You never,

I mean, I don't know if I should be insulted. You should. No, but honestly, yo, yo, don't fuck her pussy, trash. You never, I mean, I don't know if I should be insulted. You should. No, but honestly. Yo, yo, don't fuck her pussy trash. You brought me to laugh house. I heard what the streets was saying.

I was like, nah, I'm good. She was like, hey, I'm like, let's work on these jokes. It's all you know. Go hard or go fucking home. Because I'm not going to get hard and you're going to go home. No, I'm just joking. No, but honestly,

you never, like it really wasn't, because it looked, from an outsider's point of view, I'm brand new into comedy, to be getting five minutes in front of a real audience on a really good show

with a professional comedian that's like a TV star, it looks like we were fucking you to get it. And there was none of that. You literally believed in us. Are you filing a complaint? No, I'm telling you.

Like, it's fucking... And even when you were mad at me for three years, you weren't talking to me, I was always grateful. Because you said I got brand new, and I wasn't black, so I didn't really know what that meant. Urban Dictionary, Google it. Brand new. Brand new. But go ahead.

But you were mad at me because you had moved to LA. By the way, you listened to Empire State of Mind. He would get wasted, alright? 40 would drive us around town. He was leaving. He did like a farewell tour. You're chain smoking cigarettes. The windows are down. You're crying into New York City, screaming this song.

He's screaming New York into New York City, screaming the song. He's screaming New York into New York. Leaving New York. Then leaving New York. Then you move to L.A. and I came out here. My boyfriend was moving to L.A. so I drove him out here to break up with him. It was a weird thing that happened.

Only white people do that. It was very white. Only white people drive cross-country and listen to country music and shit. We were listening to Papa Roach. Yeah, people's not going to make it time to go home. It was our last resort. We drove out here. And then you knew I was in town.

And then I couldn't come hang out with you because I was crying into my boyfriend's lapel or something. I don't know. Right. His flannel shirt. And then you were mad at me for not. You were like, no spots, no love. And I was like, no, it's not about, I literally am like going through, and I couldn't articulate it.

Looking back on it, I should have never, I mean, obviously, who gives a fuck, I should have just come hung out with you. But you were mad at me for that. But the whole time you were mad at me, I was never like, fuck Donnell, Donnell's an asshole. I was like, I knew. But the thing about it, like every example of me getting mad at people, and we talked about it in the last episode, being narcissistic or whatever that fucking word is.

It's like I never, it was like me being mad was only because I was trying to encourage and start disappointing. A million percent. It was never like, bitch, don't do this. It was more like, bitch, you can do this. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? But that's what I'm saying. I always knew that.

Like I never was, I never was like fucked on out. Like I always, you, when you said go hard and go home, like who knows if you hadn't said that's what I'm saying. I always knew that. I never was fucked on out. When you said go hard and go home, who knows if you hadn't said that to me, where would I be? Home? Honestly. I was already doing it. You'd be giving that trash pushy away your jersey.

Home. No. Javad's just saying home. That's bullshit. I'm from Philadelphia. Okay, I'm sorry. I'm from Philadelphia. Oh, you would have gave that racist handjob. I'm from Philadelphia. Oh, you the game that raises heads.

Fuck you, nigga. I'm sorry. No, but it was. It was like you fucking changed my shit. You're my comedy papa. I owe you fucking everything. Thank you. Same for me. Yes, you're very kind to us.

Yo, you seem like you're acting right now. Nobody believe your shit right now. I believe you. We believe you. What do you think? I believe women. I don't. This show's about...

Have you met my mom? This show, and this show's about girl power. And I found out in this industry, when it comes to women, situations are different when it comes to love and which one I like because women get to a point where they're so driven in their career where that

I want to say miss certain opportunities but don't I say in regard to relationships right? The eggs are drying up is that what you're saying? No not that it's just that women when you go hard, women, they get to a certain point, it's like, oh, I'm going to get

it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I don't have time for love. I don't have time for a kid. I don't have time for family. A guy can do that a lot longer than a woman, and that's the case with me. I was like, fuck that. And I had my son really later in life how do women

deal with uh juggling a career wanting to be successful and and love and relationships i don't know it's it's hard because honestly i get so much of what people want in relationships from doing stand-up. I'm sure it'll drive. I'll be very sad one day. But I do. I've had so many boyfriends that want more of me. I'm like, dude, I get it from audiences.

I don't know why they wanted that, but no good. No, I'm just joking. Yo, they fucking destroyed me for the first 15 minutes of the fucking show. Did I destroy him? No. I did call him gay within 10 seconds of his going. But look at how tight his pants are. He's wearing rainbow shoes, dude. It's like the fucking gay pants.

White girls like pants that's your size. If you're 32, wear 32s, nigga. Easy. But whatever. It doesn't matter. I would rather fucking do comedy than stop doing comedy and then be mad at a, like, looking at a motherfucker. Like, fucking do comedy from me.

Yeah, the resentment. For me, it's like, I put so much into it. I mean, you did two shows. Bitch, my other career.

Yo, after I did that eight minute snippet, I was like, it's time to retire. Start a family. The whole world. I did eight minutes

this time. There's nothing else for me to do in my career I start a family no no no I'm gonna thank my mother my God and everything else

shut up no seriously it's tough cause I'm West Indian and I have the pressures of going back home and everybody's like where's your husband

where's your kids and I'm you know I'm 33 so I don't want the resentment from whoever I settled with and I'm not gonna settle

and you know black don't crack and you know 45 the time comes they'll come so career first for me if I don't know if I know you gotta go soon cuz you got to be on stage right now real quick if you weren doing... I know you got to go. That's the whole thing of comedy. Doing spots. Appreciate you coming. If you weren't doing comedy,

what do you think you'd be doing? I'd be fucking dead. Really? Mm-hmm. So comedy saved your life? Mm-hmm. I quit drinking to do comedy. God damn.

I know motherfuckers that do comedy to drink. I'm dead. Yo! You know how many nights I didn't get paid but got fucked up at that bar, son? It sucks when they pay you in drink tickets. I'm like, thanks for the Diet Coke, dude. No, black people, black,

when I was doing chilling circles, them niggas pay you in chicken wings and shit. The black circle, you know you're not gonna get paid when they start off like this. Whenever black promoter do this, well we didn't get to turn out we expected. How your mama doing? Your mama all right?

Did you eat? Did you get something to eat? Nigga, where my money? I've also seen the shows you've done where you got paid fucking stacks of cash. Me? Yeah, dude. It happens sometimes. I went into Deep Brooklyn with you before.

You took me to some, I've gotten booed in front of you several times. I know, but I'm telling you, even with that, but even, I'm telling you, even when, I know you gotta leave, even when the thing that I really'm telling you, even when, I know you got to leave, even when the thing that I really loved about you, even when the shit wasn't working out like you wanted to, and

I put you in some tough situations, you never had fear in your face, and you never felt like, I'm not going to do it. It always like, fuck it. It was Asperger's. Yeah. I've learned to smile. That's good. No, no, no, I love it. It's my favorite good no no no I love it it's my favorite thing to do

I love it I would rather be bombing than not on stage that's a good thing I know you gotta leave thank you for coming Andy Letterman ladies and gentlemen keep doing your thing girl

I'm a cash app for you too alright white people don't have cash apps you got Venemo what is that oh shit me too me too she ain't grab no ass

another cell phone Javante you what do you think you'd be doing if you weren't in this business doing what I'm doing now I'm not doing comedy

not too many options if I weren't dancing producing having my own fragrance line, I probably would be a lawyer or a psychologist. Really? Mm-hmm.

I don't believe that. Anyway. No, no. I'm fucking with you. No, I was in the law magnet school. Me neither. You was in law magazine? That don't make a motherfucker be a lawyer.

No, the law magnet school. So I was in the law magnet program. So how do you do law magnet school? How do you stick the lawyers up on the refrigerator like that? You have an interview. Shut the fuck up. You have an interview. Wait for it.

Let that joke marinate. Don't just run through my joke. Law magnet. How do you put the lawyers on the refrigerator like that? Anyway, no, I had a plan. I knew I was going to go to NYU Law. I thought I'd be this big time lawyer and then I was dancing professionally at the age of 12

and then I started doing commercials and tours and I honestly I couldn't fathom a life without living my dreams and I've been grateful to be able to do that. You said live your dreams and I probably talked about this on the podcast once. There's one of my women mentors.

Her name was Jess Jones. She was a dope Marine vet and everything. And I asked her a question. She was like, what do you want to do? What's your dream? And I started naming this shit. She was like, we are living the dream. So in all actuality, being able to support yourself,

being able to create a lifestyle for yourself off of a God-given talent, you're already living the dream. Yes. Yes. Yes. Cool. What you would do, what do you think you'd be doing if you weren't doing stand-up? I'd be in jail. You'd be in jail?

Yeah. For what? Bitcoin scandal? Who knows? For something. Right. But what were you doing before you did comedy? You don't think you would have pursued, stayed in that business?

Stayed in what business? Comedy? Your job. Before you started doing comedy. Oh, I sold pens for Sharpie. So you realize she didn't remember what she did. This is like the whole Bill Cosby shit. She didn't remember what she did, but she remember me grabbing her ass,

but she don't remember what she did. Women never forget. Free Cosby, nigga. Fuck that Cosby coming home, man. Anyway, meet my lawyer. Yes. We could settle this right here. Oh, is she a lawyer?

Boy, I'm about to win everything. We're done. I'm willing to settle for $20,000. No, marketing. You were marketing? I studied marketing, and I got a job selling pens in Boston. But then I got laid off because I wasn't good. At selling pens?

Well, no. I was good. My numbers were good. How the fuck you can't sell a pen? It's like, yo, somebody pull out a paper, you gotta sell. You know, that's when you jump in. When you pulling out your pens?

When everybody got a pen? No, the thing is, you know how corporate America is? I don't fuck with corporate America. Everybody, like, gossips about you, and everybody told all my bosses, like, oh, she really wants to do comedy. She doesn't really want to sell pens. So, they found out, and then they just, like, laid me off really wants to do comedy. She doesn't really want to sell pens. So they found out, and then they just laid me off once the recession

hit. And fucking, what, 15 years later, whatever, you're now a pop star? I'm seeing your videos. Are we allowed to play any of your videos? Yeah. You're not going to be like, yeah, they be like, send me no copyright shit like Donnell. You owe me $2 million in ad space.

Well, no, we're still settling the Me Too case from the ass grabbing. Me Too? Man, y'all can't Me Too me. Y'all already fucking admitted all the fucking shit I did. It's null and void. You're too old to Me Too. That's who get Me Too. How many young niggas get Me Too. That's who get Me Too. How many young niggas get Me Too?

It's all old heads getting Me Too. The young guys are scared of women. Yeah. They don't even animate. Yeah, you know why young guys are scared of women? Because young guys are sucking dick nowadays. That is so true. Only old heads still eating pussy.

I'm old school. Young dudes don't want no pussy. Young dudes want school. Yes. Young dudes don't want no pussy. They're fluid. They're fluid. Young dudes want dick. Yes. Especially this guy with his fucking cardigan. Ooh. Definitely.

You see what happens? This is school, schoolyard shit. She get destroyed. She pick on you. You ain't have shit to do with it. She was like this, what the fuck are you laughing at? Fucking mass shooter in the front row? She ain't want none of this, motherfucker.

We together, son. Psych still don't trust white people. Come on, bro. Wakanda forever. This is black history, motherfucker." First off, I want to thank all the young ladies that came on. I love these people right here. I love them. I want to shift it or whatever,

but I've noticed, like, when I first started doing comedy, you had different styles of comedy. You had a comic that wrote jokes, storyteller, like a dude that tells stock jokes. Then you had people that do crowd work. When I first started crowd work comedians weren't they was looked at like They weren't shit You know it's like yeah, I did 45 minutes. Yeah, but you did 20 minutes worth of crowd work

That's how I was we didn't respect the improv Improvisational skills you had to do crowd work. And then we talk about 20-some years later, one of the biggest parts of comedy right now is just people doing crowd work. I never was one that was against crowd work, because I was like, it's one thing to know your jokes in your set, but it's another thing to make comedy happen in the moment. And with that, I'm finding out that people like crowd work,

and something that's been big, all this podcast world is new to me. All this shit is new to me. All this shit is new to me. People have been very critical of me. Well, you need to do this. You need to put this picture right here. Yeah, I like that. And I want to care.

But then I want to say fuck you at the same time. It's tough. So I created this hashtag. It's called Fuck You Don't listen. And I'm not responding with it, just fuck you don't listen.

It's one thing, like, motherfuckers that be coming at me, they be like, fuck you, they be using these words cringe, nigga. I didn't even know what cringe meant. So I started listening to podcasts, and I'm saying this is simple and I know I might be over my head but if you don't like

something don't listen to it I don't need to hear your voice or why you don't want to listen to it nigga don't listen that's it it's easy and I ain't trying to judge anybody by their followers. And I get mad sometimes. Then I look. It be a nigga. He got one post. Five followers. The nigga's following 30,000 niggas. So he's just on the internet to be like... Having a good day? Not today.

But I've noticed, I've done podcasts, and the point I'm making is that a big part of all comedy shows, at the end of a show, doing Q&As, and the worst thing you do is start a Q&A, and people don't want to ask you a question. They're like, I'm trying to get out of here, man.

But I really appreciate this episode. This is the first time I did a live show. I really appreciate you guys. But if there are any questions, and I'm going to... Wu-Tang. Shut up. Son, hello? What up, son?

Son, you're being recorded. I'm in the motherfucking... This is my live up, son? Son, you're being recorded. I'm in the motherfucking... This is my live podcast, right? And I know some people that's... You got a podcast? It's not my last, nigga. Why you trying to get me to quit? This is a live podcast.

And you is responsible... You is responsible for connecting me with RZA, right? Yes, my brother, yes. So is there a chance that RZA's going to ever do my podcast? Right. I think there is a chance. I can never speak for RZA, but I definitely believe there's a chance because he got nothing left for you.

Y'all hear that shit, nigga? Yeah. So. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I Y'all hear that shit, nigga? So. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I know. It's all good. I appreciate it. And I appreciate you linking that shit up when we did it.

Are you in L.A.? Because there's a show tomorrow that I want you to come to. What show? Zom-Face show. It's second deck. It's Zom-Face. There's a show in L.A. tomorrow. There's a lot of people coming out.

You need to be there. Where's your podcast at? All right, where? Yeah, nigga, I'm there. Nigga, send me there. Wu-Tang Clan ain't nothing to fuck with, son. You already know that. Are you going to be here?

You here now? I'm here now. I'm in L.A. right now. Nigga, why you didn't come to my podcast? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. I'm here now. I'm in L.A. right now. Nigga, why you didn't come to my podcast? Nigga, what the fuck is you talking about, son? Where you at? I'm in West Hollywood.

Oh, nah, nigga, fuck that. I'm in West Hollywood. I'm at the improv. Huh? You know you ain't going to sleep. You come over here. Nah, nigga, I ain't fuck with you. I got an interview with Monique in the morning. I can't fuck with you tonight. I'm going to hitique in the morning. I can't fuck with you tonight. I'm going to hit you when I finish.

I'm about to wrap it up. All right. You coming to the show tomorrow? I'm going to send you the info. 100%. I'll be there. All right. No doubt. Peace.

So what I was saying was, I don't even know how to do this. Q&A. Q&A. Well, can we say thank you for being our mentor, our friend, our elder? I'm telling you. I'm telling you. Every woman, and I really believe, I really truly believe that women really, they definitely run the world. Yes.

It can't be argued. Let's go. The reason why they run the world is because they create the world. They create, but it's just like, hands down, women are the best shit ever. They get on

motherfucking nerves sometimes, but we can't fucking survive or live without them. And as much as people, I understand, like, women rights and what they want,

women have come a long way. When I go to these auditions, when I go to do projects and shit, like, the people, the top people in charge, women, women, women, women, women, women. But men, you know, we ignorant with certain shit. We have dumb ideas about certain shit. But we change it, and we're trying to think better.

Motherfuckers are trying not to be ignorant. That's one of the best things I think about the Me Too movement is making motherfuckers slow their roll and shit that they thought was acceptable back in the day is not acceptable anymore.

And something has to happen hardcore for you to be like, oh shit, I had to change my shit. And for me, that's what the Me Too movement is doing. Now,

I don't know how to do this transition from that Me Too to like, anybody got a question about my career? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anybody? No, we can do yeah. It could be short. Yeah, give it to me. Yes.

Get up for yeah, yeah, yeah, our producers. This nigga know everything. I'll say something like, we're gonna do yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You did, yeah, yeah, yeah. Anybody? Oh, this is the worst shit. Somebody better ask a fake question. No, I don't know how to assemble an AK-47.

I do. I know you do. Yeah, I know. Yeah. How old were you when you did your first open mic? What? Your first open mic. How old were you?

Nigga, I'm an actor. Nigga, I don't ask no age questions. Nigga, you better Google me. Fucking smart ass. My first open mic. How old were you? I'm an actor. I don't ask no age questions. You better Google me. Fucking smart ass. My first open mic my first open mic I was probably what? On the military. 23. Probably

23, 22. Yeah. I always remember you telling me this story about before you booked your first acting gig you would go to the courthouse downtown and pretend you were relatives of the person who just got indicted. No, that's not what I did. What?

Yeah, you would go on camera. No, this is what I used to do. When I first moved from D.C. to New York, I wasn't on TV. I couldn't get an audition or anything. So People's Court, right, at the end of every piece, People's Court, they would have Harvey Levin come out, right?

And he would talk about the plaintiffs and defendants, and he would do a recap of the story. And I knew what it would be, so I would go there every day and act like I was an innocent person just walking past like, oh, shit, what are you guys doing? And like waving the camera. That was my first TV credit was just fucking bum-rushing. You're so resourceful.

You get your acting classes from the courthouse steps. No, well, you know what? You can try to make this negative at all. All you want to cool. What I'm saying is like, I need to get on TV, and guess what? It was motherfuckers coming up to me talking about, yo, was you just was you just on people's court?

That was my first credit. I thought that was amazing. I wasn't putting you down. He has another one. All right. This nigga got two questions. I ain't got no more fans. He's going to change his voice next. So nigga, let me tell you something.

What made you want to join the Air Force? What made me want to join the Air Force? I didn't really want to join the Air Force, but when I was in high school, I wasn't really academically gifted. Not that I was dumb. I just didn't focus on that. I was more with my hands on the creative side. And back then, you know, guidance

counselors, they didn't know what to do with a motherfucker like me. So, like, my brother went to Brown University at Georgetown Law. When he went to guidance office, they was like, oh, we can get this motherfucker in Brown, Georgetown, whatever. But me, they pointed to the military posters. It was like, you better choose one of them motherfuckers. You better aim higher, be a few good men.

And I didn't have really a skill set or anything. And for a lot of black people, that's like a transition. And your life is a good transition you see a lot of blacks in the military you see a lot of latinos in the military not because they're super patriotic but because they wanted to get a regular check they want some benefits they want to give themselves an opportunity to get like a gi bill to go to college and a lot of people from where i grew up with military was a good option to get your life together. For me, it was the first time I ever got on an airplane. It was the first time I ever went outside

of Alexandria, Virginia. I saw people from around the world. So, you know, it was a great transition for me. And whenever I go out and do shows, people are like, yo, thank you for your service. I'm like, nigga, don't thank me. Fuck with me. You would've been killed in a war.

You know, I wasn't white dudes. They'd be painting their faces and shit. They'd be like, they know all the fucking, they know how to take the gun apart. I'm like, man, if we go into war right now, everybody behind me dead, son. Yeah, but it was like, I don't have any regrets. I really appreciate, you know, serving my country.

But it was for me, in my life, that was the best thing for me to do, not to go to jail or be a drug dealer or whatever. It was just a good transition for me. TAYA GRAHAM MCCORMICKILEAN, JR.: Any other? What's, what was I going to say? I had a question now hang on a second this motherfucker smoked the same weed I smoked on Joe Rogan's show

I quit weed on Monday actually I had to no problem oh I was going to ask when is the hat book coming out I've been working on that book for like nine months the hat book coming out? I've been working on that book for like nine months. The hat book, what you're talking about is my father passed away a couple years ago,

and I had a box of all of his old hats. And my son, I was going through the box, he said, what is this? I'm like, this is your granddaddy hats. So I started telling stories of my dad's life through those hats, which made me start telling stories of the hats. I like to wear a chef hat, the airman hats, whatever. Well, I guess the answer to your question is I'm probably a month away from having it really done because it's good, but I want to get a certain rhythm.

I want to get a rhythm for the people that don't like to read out loud or get nervous about reading to their kids. I want to have a rhythm where it's like it's got a flow. I did, it's so funny because I did a reading at my son's school, my son's four, and to teach they had like book week coming up. And my dumb ass said, oh I want to do book week. And I forgot, like I'm nervous about reading out loud. I talked about it on Showtime. Right? I was like, I want to do a book. She looked at me like, you want to do it?

I was just talking shit. I didn't really want to do it. She was like, how's the Thursday set? I was like, bitch, I ain't ready to read it for them little motherfuckers. And I pulled it off. I told her I was, I lost my voice. And I did it. And I was nervous as shit because I didn't want to

embarrass my son and it was so fucking funny because they've made a big deal as a all Don is come and then one day today I flaked on it my son's next day he said daddy I thought you was supposed to come and read our book I was like oh shit I gotta come back so when I finally went I'm nervous oh shit, I gotta come back. So when I finally went, I'm nervous as shit. Because I thought I was just walking there. Man, they had all these little goddamn kids in a circle. And you know, George Bishop, you got the little cheer. You know, you don't read the book at no bar. You gotta get down right here.

And the teacher was right there. And they left the opening. It was like, here's Austin's dad. And my son was looking at me like this, nigga, you better not fucking start stuttering. You know they gonna tear my ass up at lunch tomorrow. And I was so

worried. And he was so excited to see me and I was like, fuck, if I play myself, I will play myself doing something nice for my fucking son. I didn't give a fuck. So I sat down and I'm like this. I'm used to opening. I can go in front of adults or whatever. I'm like, I don't got no opening joke for no fucking four-year-olds.

I'm like this. I don't even got no nigga I can call like, you got some shit I can do for four-year-olds? And I know I was a hacky-ass comedian, and I know I'm telling you, if you ever got to talk for kids, I'm telling you, I started off with this. If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands.

And my face was overexpressive. You can't be a thug saying happy and you know it. If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands, nigga. I was like, if you're happy... Look at my face. I was like, if you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. It was just one little white kid. I was like, if you're happy and you know it, clap your hands.

They was like, pop, pop. It was just one little white kid. He was like this. I was like, I ain't never seen no kid not be happy and you know it. It's like, yeah! I was like, if you're. And I went right there.

I was like, if you're happy and you know it. He was looking at me like, I'm not happy. And I was like this, you're not happy? He was like, no. I don't even got no other joke for not being happy. So I went to his wonderful friend. I was like, yo, your man ain't happy. Could you make him happy?

And then he made him happy. And then I'm telling you, if I didn't get anything out of that, my son was so happy. And y I'm telling you, if I didn't get anything out of that, my son was so happy. And y'all caught, look, listen. Y'all know me from the internet world as the interrupter. My son is the little interrupter. I was trying to read the book. I'm like this.

And I'm trying, I'm like this. And me and Austin's favorite part, and he was like, no, no, no, no, no! That's not it, daddy! And I'm like, son, you know these trolls gonna fucking hate on you. Because trolls hate. And I'm gonna end this show.

I got a lot of trolls. And the motherfuckers, fuck you, fuck that. The one troll that hurt me the most somebody tweeted corny ass nigga corny ass nigga

people like this oh I see why you can be offended he called you the N-word no nigga he called me the C-word nigga I've been an ashy nigga I've been a broke nigga Oh, I see why you could be offended. He called you the N-word. No, nigga, he called me the C-word, nigga. I've been an ashy nigga. I've been a broke nigga.

Corny-ass nigga. I want to thank y'all. This was, like, last week, last week, my producer, Derry, was like, yo, we got to get on the book. We got on the book. And I was like, fuck it. They gave me some dates, like, two months from now. I said, fuck it. Let's do it. Let's do it. He said, when? Next week. We got on the book. And I was like, fuck it. They gave me some dates like two months from now. I said, fuck it. Let's do it.

Let's do it. He said, when? Next week. We did this next week. I think I'm out the gate. I really appreciate it. This is going to go nationwide. If you're not already following the Don and Rollin Show, make sure you, as my son would say, hit that red button.

Subscribe. And I will always try to be the realest motherfucker I can. I'll always try to represent the streets. And I always will be pushing the limits on what's too soon. I'm Don Aironis. Thank y'all. Have a good night. Javanta Roberts, everybody.

Thank you. Esther Kuh, everybody. And Andy Letterman. Shout out to Julia. Shout out to Aaron. Shout out to Deary. Shout out to Julia. Shout out to Aaron. Shout out to Deary. Shout out to everybody that fucking worked with me that's not getting paid saying,

fuck it, we're going to build something. I'm down at Rollins. Let's play that. Good night. Let's have a drink. Thank you. We'll be right back. Thank you.