Don't Blame Me! - BAIW: Caught Insta-Stalking

Episode Date: June 13, 2024

But Am I Wrong: Meghan - Having a nanny is a luxury Melisa - Stop trying to rely on Black women to save the world or be your scapegoat  But Are You Wrong: Having a wedding the same year as your cousin Watching someone's stories that you don't know But Are They Wrong Meghan - Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta Melisa - Sheriff Chad Bianco Write In: [e-mail] Weigh In: vote in the weekly poll on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/by.meghan.and.melisa/ Buy Our Merch: https://store.dftba.com/collections/don-t-blame-me Join Our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/dontblameme Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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all ready to go from day one so you can hit the ground running. Bring it with SAP Grow. AI Cloud ERP for any size business. hello it's your favorite gossip girlies year except we're not gossip girl we're girlies who gossip that's true it wasn't gossip girl a man anyway what it wasn't gossip girl a man anyway oh yeah it was dan wasn't it i didn't i just heard it from the grapevine i didn't actually watch the show i never think i ever got to that point there's no way i ever got to that point

i could never get over the chuck bass of it all i really tried you know i don't because i didn't watch the show well you know you know you'll get it you'll get it you'll get it i know they did a lot of whispering who whispered the men yeah that was like the acting style of like are you a hot man how quietly can you talk i did watch the showrunners talk about the show and that was the direction they were given no it was like you know what men should be seen on earth and like i kind of fucking agree so welcome to another episode of but am i wrong starring two people who have not once ever in the history of their time on earth which has been both so quick and also eternal and some might say too long some days i'm thinking oh i have been here for a while

and other days i'm like i actually just got here i'm just a baby i have no idea what i'm doing why are you talking to me like that anyways it's okay everyone life is a roller coaster life comes at to fast there's a lot of loops sometimes a lot of plane a little flat sometimes it's a death drop speaking last week we talked about like things that came from ferris bueller that life comes at you fasting is from ferris bueller but it's just part of lexicon now everything is like like everything origins latin or ferris bueller's day off or back to the future and i'm like no way well this is a wonderful podcast and we should know that because we do make exclusively wonderful podcasts and um if you have listened to our other shows before this is referred to like

podcasts you listen to after don't blame me so like you didn't take our advice and you did the thing and then we tell you if you're in the wrong or not so we have three different segments it's a fun grand old time we'll explain each of the segments before them but what you really have to remember is this is it's not just about us it is about us but it's not just about us because we also want to hear your thoughts so we want to hear who you think was wrong in every segment that we have and to do that we post the votes over on our instagram story and then you can vote on them send us messages like why you voted the way you did maybe you're the person like from the segment we were the writer you write in you give us more details more updates

like whatever and then we read all of that as well as the results on our friday episode which is called lovingly fisting friday exactly it's just a loving little fist so keep your eyes open your ears open you what i think of is the tiny hand sketch it's that kind of fist like we're not trying to like that's not even a finger to be honest well that's what i'm saying like it depends like we're starting if they're brand new we're starting out slow we're not about to like rip the was it perennium perineum episiotomy encyclopedia whatever that fucking word is we're not trying to do that we're working our way up to that thanos glove i don't know if we've ever told people this but like one of our dreams and like let's just manifest into the space we

like had tried to do it but it's actually very hard we wanted to come out with like vibrators like sex toys this was like years and years and years ago and um we were doing some market research and the way that we found these marvel vibrators and then some that didn't vibrate they were just dildos y'all there is a thanos glove that would split me in half not just thanos but hulk too that one i that one i got a soft spot for hulk so like maybe he looks like your fiance yeah he except mark ruffalo's little more petite but i love that man so but the the thanos glove because i can't help but think of it on thanos's giant meaty yeah purple uh tree trunk of an arm there was also uh thor's hammer was one of them too and we talked so long about the actual shape

of that and like what's the goal and what's like it was the angle the way we were i i remember i think you sent me the first one and i wasn't like the we were together when it was happening it was when someone said someone must have said we opened something in the whole foods parking lot and i just remember almost dropping my phone and then us both doing the same like turning our head at the same time trying to make where does it how if it what is it how does it work like this basically the question we had was you're asking google is can you do like how custom can you get with these things and turns out incredibly custom yeah and then it was too much and overwhelming and then we said we'll come back to this at a later date yeah there was also a spider-man with his little twit

fingers but i'm just like he's a child can we not it's like shocker and it was like whoa whoa that's fucking crazy like so can we call him spider boy please but i know he becomes a man eventually but as he exists right now in the mcu he is a child he's a literal high schooler yes so can we just call him spider boy so there's no confusion and is it the spider boy from the cartoon miles morales is that what his is that whose name is no he's also spider-man no i was gonna say but isn't he like also freshman high school like isn't he like a young iteration yeah yes but in that universe spider-man is a grown man like peter parker spider-man is grown i need to watch that you love it i know i'll love it yes you will i'm in an animated movie like

kick i haven't done it yet but i want to watch them i will say the second one that came out feels like two years ago now at this point i don't know if i think it was two years ago at least a year ago they the way that the second that second one ends is like where's the rest of the movie they split it into two and it has not come out yet so i would wait until the new one comes out and then watch them yes you know because i will actually take a boycott literally everybody in the theater just like it just got quiet and everybody was looking around like did they accidentally cut the movie off the way i would scream i'd flip i'd flip a table over yeah and then it said coming i think it said next year shut up or to be continued or something like that

movies do not need cliffhangers no like stop or give me a cliffhanger and a bathroom break a little intermission and i'll pop back into my seat but don't tell me to wait two years no i'm so mad i'm not i'm not seeing this again right it was so good you want to see it again but it's just like yeah no i'll wait until that blue walls blue clear come on can't leave my blue teasing me as we say we need to start calling him a man because it's talking about child anyways well what is the show well we already said that i think i said that so our first segment is but am i wrong where we pitch a hot take a lukewarm take a rant or uh something going on in our lives that we ask the other person are are we wrong and uh we also have to call you for wrong so

it can be any of those things and today I have what I would say is a lukewarm take initially I thought but as I keep deep diving over my course of like my latest hyper fixation has been like reading things about this turns out I guess it might be a hot take and that is having a nanny is a luxury and we know or maybe if you're new here I have ended up because I love reading like am I the asshole subreddits I love reading I also like really love reading am I the angel where people just like make pretend it might be asshole pose about being like i'm like a really great person i like saved a dog from like a burning building but someone was like oh no like your shirt got burned like a bad person like just and i'm like hilarious love those and they read it

was like we hear you love gossip have you ever thought about joining a subreddit about the profession the nanny and i was like no the profession the nanny the profession nannying and the things not to be confused with the professional nanny friend that that's that subreddit melissa free points and i have just been like reading things over time and it's great like you have posts from parents prospective parents you also post from like professional career nannies and all of that and i you know knew that this was like okay this is this is a lot But the thing about that subreddit is like, it's run or heavily most of the users who are posting on it are nannies. So they're like, okay, here are the things like I can rattle off like guaranteed

hours, like, you know, sick pay, can't do overtime, you can't, I mean, you have to do overtime, overtime time and a half, like you, you can't be a yearly employee, you can't be salaried all like, I know all these things, and they have their like standards. And so when people start posting about job listings or advice, rightfully, parents who are trying to take advantage don't get through the cracks a lot. Then my phone, because it listens to me. Hello, little phone. Thank you for listening. It was like, let me serve you some stuff on TikTok. And it is a girl who is, I guess, she's a nanny, but she also coaches and helps other nannies, whether it's helping them write contracts or write emails. And seeing some of the messages

that these parents are requesting of saying, so this is a good job listing. They'll advertise it being $30 an hour. And then they'll do the interview. And it's like, actually, it's live-in. You'll pay $200 rent. And that's your pay. It's just discounted rent.

And you'll work 24 hours a day, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then when people respond and they're like, oh, no, not interested in this. And it's like, well, what do you expect me to do? having a nanny is a luxury but the idea that also people should just be blessed to spend time with your child cool the same way you have to make money other people have to make money right and i saw a tiktok yesterday of a stay-at-home mom who was talking about how much they pay their nanny and someone commented on it and like all of like the things that she has and she's like we didn't

get it right with our first nanny and like i will totally own up to it like i i'm always trying to do better i don't know if we're doing like the best but like we want to show her that we appreciate her and someone commented like this can't be right you're paying her like over seventy thousand dollars a year like that's insane and she responded like well she needs to make a living wage and that person replied back again a fully grown adult was like well what am i i'm giving away my entire paycheck and i'm like to someone else's paycheck like this idea that having a child and bringing a child into the world is like the the most like important and like beautiful thing and the thing that you value above everything else but then you're like i want to have someone who is going

to watch my kid for 12 hours a day for two and a half dollars an hour and that's going to be the safe bet and i'm like i totally understand that daycare is so fucking expensive in places like there's someone who again saw another video of a girl is pregnant has a baby's like nine months old or something like that she got on waitlist for daycare when she was like six weeks pregnant not gonna kids not gonna get until she's there too like people go in for like first positive pregnancy test applying for it so i totally understand that but the idea that like there's a profession in which they take care of your child but they shouldn't be served a living wage it's nasty and it's it's a luxury and i and i'm i'm like i rate for people like i want to like

fight for like i want to be a nanny lawyer i'm like want to yell at all these parents when I was a young chap third grade we got a nanny because we were all three of us were by the time all three of us were in daycare it was more for us to be in daycare than what my parents mortgage was and so they were like we will still pay the same amount of money but like it's better if they have like somebody that's caring for them and so I was spying when we were doing the interview well they were doing the interviews and so I would just sit at a part of the steps and I was listening and my parents were like telling them how much they were going to pay and then I think it was a nanny agency and they were like oh so you want them to live in and

that's the salary and my parents were like no they're only going to be here from when we leave for work to when we get back so like nine to six like they don't need to stay here we're going to pay like this amount of money and then it was like the nanny agent had never heard of anybody doing that before and that was back in the 90s yeah and like even with traveling like people were commenting on this like women's post being like so because she they mentioned that their nanny travels with them and it's like wait you pay your nanny when you travel is traveling not the pay like the perk and she was like do you get paid when you go on a business trip or are you just going on the business trip and that's getting on the plane is the fun part and like that's in

the payment yeah it kills me and especially like seeing so many people who are doing it not because like they're totally strapped in a really like tough spot but doing it because they don't value the work yeah and to me I'm like and especially when women are doing that I'm like what like a weird internalized misogyny is this that like you don't value someone taking care of your children because you're going back to work which is totally fucking fine yeah but like you don't value someone taking care of your kids because you also don't put value in that for yourself so therefore then the person who does it someone has to do it they they derive like personal gratification it's the job they want to have whatever they you still don't want to pay that it's just

sick like horrible horrible horrible and I hate it yeah I did also dive into because I saw someone like posted on like the subreddit about like how many times do people apply for this thing called like adventure nannies like how many times did you apply before you had got in and I like looked at it and they have like the job listings are public it's all like private who the people are and like all of that kind of stuff and to me it is giving like working on a cruise like working on a yacht like you can't do it forever you can't do it when you have your own like mortgage to pay and you've got all that but like i think back to like damn i was like 20 21 like if i like was just at fresh out of college or like had dropped out of college and was trying to figure out what to do moving to

menlo park to a family who's going to be spending me paying me 150 000 a year not including bonuses and all of that and we split our time with like aspen but then you're working like 24 hours a day like you're working so much but you're being paid overtime for all of that like you're you're doing all that i'm like shit that's fucking impressive yep so yeah and i just want to give shout out to all the nannies babysitters and also shout out to any caretakers who are taking care of kids like that shit is work and you should be paid yep great all right time for mine mine is stop trying to rely on black women to either save the world or be your scapegoat especially when you're making misleading comments that could potentially lead to harming it so after

trump was convicted this white man posted a photo of members of the manhattan court and in the photos there were three black women who who are part of the appellate court justice and it said do you think Trump has a chance in the Manhattan appeals court so this photo they were basically saying that these women's minds are already made up because they just exist and they're black and they're women as if like if there was just a photo of all white men would you have that same kind of bias towards them and also the whole appellate division of the first judicial department has 21 justices only five of them are black women and from that court randomly there are five justices that are selected at chance so the chances of all five of

those women being part of his appeals process is like slim to none it made me furious when i first saw it and this post is circulating not just like it's circulating in two different ways some people are like celebrating it and then some people are saying that it's a bad thing and this unfairly is putting a target on these women's backs because we know that his supporters are unhinged as fuck so like before reposting things please educate yourself on what you're actually reposting and i wanted to thank the uh luncheon lawyer for breaking down why all this was wrong yeah is the original do you know who the original one was i've i saw it posted so many times i don't know who did the first one right now and you're right like some of the people are posting it the

captions are relatively the same but like they're democrats or like progressive and then not like yeah that's yeah i don't even know who's yeah i don't even know who they're they're messaging the first person i saw posted was some white man and then but i don't know if they were the original poster of it yeah but what i'm seeing a lot of them is like pretty much the same engagement and like the same captions but totally different affiliation or intention yep i wonder where they even got the photo i think it was like announced because i think it's the most black women that have been on it and then somebody just like found that there's 20 there's 21 and there's yeah it's a fraction yep you are not wrong at all so did you see Trixie Mattel DJs now and but did like

the beat drop was like Donald Trump is a felon and then the beat drops and I was like love that Trixie love that I was watching just as the uh I watched the video after because like I said we recording of just like the votes rolling in on msnbc and they were just like the glee that was one thing i i like for my news to be unbiased but sometimes i'd want to watch msnbc because they are so like in the left pocket that they do not hide their glee and they are all just giddy as the as the i said votes as the um or the verdict yes the verdicts were rolling in on each count and i was just like this is funny i need both i can't have entirely unbiased like i need to be able to opt into my bias news yeah i feel like cnn is like the opt-in it's like they they they say they're

unbiased but they're more left-leaning and then msnbc is just like we're just left period yeah when something like that happens i just go to my phone and i type in trevor noah what are you gonna say anymore though i know john is still cool oh yeah yeah yeah i like john stewart he's also like very funny the first time i saw him was on the navy really yeah i think it was right when the daily show has started or like it was a newer show and he came on and i didn't know who he was because like i wasn't watching the daily show and he had all dark hair but they were like fran was it was one of her many boyfriends that she had on the show all right we're gonna take a break when we get back we'll get into but are you wrong

your playlist might get you through the workday but have you ever wondered how your ancestors spent theirs? What work helped them build a life? How did they adapt as the world around them changed? With Ancestry, you can search select historical occupational records for free for a limited time and discover the stories behind the jobs in your family tree. You've got questions. We've got ancestors. Search free until August 31st. Visit ancestry.ca for details. Terms apply. and we are back it is time for but are you wrong and this is where we read your submissions the situations that you have found yourself in where you want to know if you were the hero or the villain and it's up to us to tell you so you can send them over to but am i wrong pod at gmail.com

keep them under 300 words please let us know your age you can let us know your pronouns if you would like but just know that the whole thing is anonymous so come up with some fake names you don't have to create a theme with them. But if you do create a theme, make sure you're thinking it through. And it is intentional because otherwise we will read into it and think it means something else. I'm so excited about this. First up. Hi, Eminem, long-time listener, first-time writer. I need to know if my fiance and I are wrong in this situation. Backstory. My cousin, 28, the same age as me, and his fiance got engaged about eight months prior to me and my fiancé. They set a wedding date for September of this year and a few months after they got

engaged. When me and my fiancé got engaged, we chose a wedding date two months after theirs in November, purposefully chose a date after theirs, and we will have been engaged for 13 months by our wedding. Recently, I've learned my cousin's fiancé is furious with us as she thinks we are quote-unquote taking away from their wedding. Our weddings are going to be completely different, including them having a smaller guest list and us having a larger one due to the size of our families our shared relatives have already committed to attending both weddings my cousin and his fiance have talked non-stop shit about us to multiple people in my family my family agrees that we shouldn't have to put our lives on hold for another year because of their wedding but

the guilt is starting to get to me am i wrong for having a wedding the same year as them what are you guilty for i mean i think like two months is i i think it's like totally fine i guess like how close are you and your cousin like you know do they feel like you're upstaging them because you're they're like the opening act and then they're gonna be like because like people are not gonna be like well i'm not i'm not gonna party hard in this wedding because in two months i gotta got another wedding i want to really let my hair down no one's gonna do that like it's it's far it's not like oh i can't be hung over because the other thing's the next day i this is my problem with weddings and i think this might be your problem too

don't want to i love everything about weddings there's nothing about them i would change i think they're whole perfect and amazing you getting married is about you it should not be about anyone else what anybody else does on their wedding day is just like icing on the cake for you to enjoy for other people to enjoy in your marriage there is no showing off or like showing up other people because they are simply getting married in the same season they're not even the same season they're a fall wedding you're i don't know when seasons change but more fallish more winterish yeah or late summer september late summer yeah like this is ridiculous do not feel guilty about this they will get over it because if they're truly happy in their own

marital bliss what you do is not their problem yeah nobody cares about your wedding as much as you do like and i don't even mean that like you care a little more than everybody else no i promise you care so much people don't care like it's just like it's so many people's weddings and i'm like I'm here to be a witness for you and enjoy your day but like nothing's gonna change in my life because of this wedding no and like the idea that like if you like you said like it's supposed to be about you getting married like that's supposed to be the end goal and if someone else having a wedding two months after that ruins it maybe you picked the wrong person to marry like that seems pretty fucking shaky to me so you're not wrong at all i think like if you're talking about like

if she's like oh yeah we're just like doing it like kind of small and you're like oh yeah we're actually getting the plaza but so it'll feel intimate but not won't be small like unless you're doing that there's literally like nothing else like when would be enough like when would be enough that like enough time where they're like okay yeah that's actually fine also i think it's when people have such a huge, like, ordeal about this, I'm like, you do know that the universe is about to, like, deliver you a January 6th that happens on your wedding.

Like, something's going to happen. Like, you can't just, like, claim a day to be like, this is all about me. Like, this whole time needs to be about me. Something's going to... Pete Davidson gets a new girlfriend. I don't know. Something in pop culture

where it becomes, like, a day or whatever that it will be... It's never just going to be about you. And so, like, to try and do that so hard to me, i'm like you're tempting the universe to just deliver you an insurrection on the date of your wedding not at your wedding but you know you know it overshadows yeah so you're not wrong at all all right next one i cannot wait for this one dear eminem i am compelled to write in for but am i wrong because i got an insta dm that i never expected to get i am 27 and there is one person

that is always recommended to me on Instagram, Tara, that I do not follow nor have I followed before. We went to the same high school but in different friend groups and maybe shared only a couple of classes. We also went to the same university in different majors and worked at the same place on campus but different departments.

So I know of Tara, but not personally at all. From my outside perspective, she was always one of the cool girls who had similar interests to me and so when her profile is recommended, I will look at her public profile and occasionally watch her public stories. Does that make me a creep to passively interact with someone I don't know personally? I honestly didn't think much of it until I received a DM from her asking me straight out, why do you watch my Instagram stories? Now I'm truly worried if I have weirded her out am i wrong to have watched her insta stories even though we don't know each

other she also added that she's just curious not judgmental and honestly doesn't understand it if you have any advice on how to respond to her i'd appreciate it i feel so embarrassed and right now i'm leaning towards deleting instagram forever i love the pod i have been listening since the beginning y'all are the best this is crazy i'm obsessed i don't think you're a creep because i do this but i don't do it from my account i do it from my finsta account yeah like i don't i say this with so much love someone steered you in the wrong direction because like this is totally normal you just it's an incredibly crucial step or the alternative is i will watch someone's public story who i don't follow because i want them to know that i watched it so like i

don't know what got lost in communication there for you and i just have to say i'm so sorry like i feel like we've steered you like this is wild like this is wild i would be don't delete your instagram i understand the embarrassment i would just mute her so then she can't see your instagram anymore but don't block her because then that gives her more power in the situation i am so sorry i am so sorry i would be mortified mortified oh my gosh i would follow her that's what i would do i would like follow her and just be like yeah at this point always like uh like you know always ran in like similar circles like your profile got suggested like totally thought i had followed you like didn't realize i didn't like hope you're well how many followers does she have like 200

people for her even to like notice that yeah and like i guess my question is like how would you have identified how would you have identified yourself in high school so like does she know you from like that like i have so much crossover so much crossover but like the way that you described like she was a cool girl who had similar interests to you i think that like i think if in the movie version like she has no idea who you are and you're total creep but i think in like the real life version if you notice you have a lot of the same interest she might also notice you have similar interests and so like a maybe it's flirting but also b it could just be like this could be the start of a friendship but i think you need to i think you need to play it

cool yeah yeah yeah to validate your feelings though like i would actually have to delete my instagram for a bare minimum week and go into a room with all the blinds closed it would be so dark and then i would just scream into a pillow and then i would do everything i would learn how a lucid dream so i could just forget this ever happened you can't though yeah i i think i would just like say that you show up and but the thing is the more that you interact with somebody's profile like watching their stories the more they're gonna show up so that's why she's always showing up for you yeah also and the thing is like instagram sorts it like your follows people that follow you are the top people that you see that looked at your stories and then it's like

people that don't follow you under that and so like she how i need to know how many people follow her i also need to know how cool is she because unless she's flirting calling someone out being like why do you watch my instagram stories it's not cool girl behavior she says she's just curious maybe she just has a curious mind keeping curious keep asking questions if it also makes you feel a little bit better i don't know if i'm going to be able to find it but someone had posted on might have been in the pop culture subreddit or it could have been in like a dumois one or something in that kind of vein but it was someone who had said like so this like celebrity had watched her instagram story that like they're not tagged in and people are all being like oh my god

yeah no this celebrity one time watch one of mine or like yeah this celebrity randomly follows me like this famous person like it was definitely on accident but like whatever so just know that like there are like legit like legitimate stars um who have like accidentally watched random people's instagram stories and they just never say anything again yeah so it's not just you nicola coughlin was loving things and liking them and saving stuff and she didn't know that people could see that she was doing all that so it happens to the best of us yeah i think the part that makes this hard is that this wasn't an accident yeah but we were just missing a crucial step in the lurking so yes you were being a creep but you're not alone there's a creep in all of us

we you need to creep care for care for me let us help us help you right get a fence megan has one i finally figured out how i could log out of it without being logged into because it was connected to the instagrams but i think they changed something in the settings where i could log out but i have my own fence to megan has her own fence most of them i used to share one so then i would be like who's this person we're talking and then you'd be like who's this person we're talking Love it. And anytime I do anything embarrassing, I like to remind myself something I think is one of the most embarrassing things that's ever happened to anyone ever. And that is that Nick Vial, Nick Vial from The Bachelor, his girlfriend at the time, now wife, for Nick's

birthday, she copy and pasted like as a giant paragraph, the last like two or three birthday wishes that claudia as in claudia salewski said to her boyfriend phineas she just copied them word for word as her caption to nick and just deleted comments and then also just ignore them and then never brought it up ever again and those it's still there so if you ever feel embarrassed just know that she did that and i asked claudia and claudia's like so she's like i don't think this is weird i was like this is crazy crazy so you haven't done that i also want to say on your make sure you delete your phone number from it because if somebody tries to log onto the account or they try to like see if they could get into your account it shows the last couple digits of

your phone number so that can if it's somebody you actually know it can trace that to you like in your contacts yes so delete your phone number also do not use your email address make a fake email address the way i have so many fake gmail me too and i like now that they like after a couple years if you're not using they'll just delete them and that's fine because i need fresh ones anyway fake ones i've created entire personas like these are entire people i've given them stories like back like yeah there used to be this website where you could use like they would give you a temporary uh email address and then it went away but those were great too because also you could see what other people were doing because the inbox for it was open so you could make the

email address and then the inbox is like you could just see what other people were up to and why they were using the email address that's funny let's just be more more stealth more stuff please more selfie all right uh we're gonna take a break thoughts and prayers like truly when you're a mid-sized business you need every competitive advantage you can get like an ai solution that works for you not against you sap grow is built with ai embedded at its core working across every system and it's ready to go from day one so you can hit the ground running Bring it with SAP Grow, AI cloud ERP for any size business. And we're back.

It is time for our final segment, which is, but are they wrong? where we nominate a person, place, or thing in current events, pop culture, zeitgeist, that we think deserves to have a little bit of a... It can go from a tsk-tsk to a tomato to a shame-shame to throw them in jail to... If you're not watching, you don't know what that means. So I have one that I've been wanting to do for a while,

but it's, like, so fucking heavy, and I'm, like, waiting for more things to come out about that. So we're not doing that today. We are doing something that pains me to say. because i don't want to nominate this person i really like this person and if anyone is a die hard fan of this person keep listening until the end okay so i would like to nominate unfortunately stephanie aka lady gaga oh she was on my list i forgot but go ahead yep uh-huh so she was doing a q a and let the record state it was this was not a direct question this was not an accusation

she was asked is there anything you like want to tell like any surprise anything like basically being like like tell us something we don't know like tell us something about because she's promoting her chromatica ball movie and she basically being like tell us is there any like any little sneak peeks like anything you can like let us know and she's live q a in front of an audience and she like turns and smiles and it's like i did what was it how many shows five i think Yeah. I did five shows with COVID. And then the audience, I'm not going to say cheers. It is the most confusing audience reaction I've heard. Cause like some people are clapping and some people are clapping and then realizing like it's catching up with what they heard. And it's so

fucking weird. And then she immediately, and like the host, and he's like doing it in like, oh my God, like girl, you, you did that. Like that's like, basically it's being looked at to be look how dedicated she is like look how impressive this is you would have had no idea no one would have known if she didn't tell you so she says that she shared it with everyone on her team and she didn't want anyone to feel uncomfortable and said like you know you don't have to work this day but i'm i'm gonna do the show and i don't want to let the fans down because the fans are already putting themselves in harm's way every day this is fucking crazy to me because Because I mean, the amount of people who responded being like, went with a family member, they died, they got COVID, they died. Like, she, it has dealt with chronic illness, like she has been like super open about that. And champions, like being forthcoming about that and like sharing that in like her other document, like in Five Foot Two, like she talks about it and like really advocates for that and has, you know, assumed the role of like a face of hidden disabilities and all of that.

that and to get up here and like say that i was just fucking shocked and i one of my friends like was it's being like oh my god have you watched it yet and i was like i'm so fucking mad at her and they were like i think live nation and i was like with love no like with like live nation doesn't want her to say like no one wants her to say that she can say that like they're not holding it off her head and i was like but and this is what i'm saying for all the fans out there because like i've also think she's incredibly talented i don't think she's a terrible person And this is not someone who I think is going to be like, oh, doubling down, like all of that. I think, I'm hoping, and sometimes she's going to go, that was like really reckless and really

stupid of me. But like the idea that she has no idea what she's done or whatever that is, like is just mind blowing to me. Like it's just truly at the end of the day, so i think out of touch to the point where like you're so far disconnected from the fact that like it's not that people have saved up money to go to your show millions people have died like this is something that is like so and then so many more people have been permanently disabled from this like to think of it as like a proud feat of what you did you have to be so far disconnected from again the disabled community which is something you've been so heavily a part of to me i'm like okay, this needs to be a reality check. Like, oh, oh, I got to get out of like, not to call

Holly weird. I got to get out of this fucking bubble and like recognize that I'm going to say this. And then in a group of people, and she goes into the audience and like all of this stuff. And like, it just made me irate because I do not agree. Like, sure. Yeah. People make calculated decisions based on the risk assessment that they have. But when you are with knowingly withholding a factor that drastically changes that that is malicious like just point blank i think that's like malicious and fucked up so i don't i don't think it matters whether someone does it for money or whatever but like you can disappoint fans for the sake of their own health as well as yours and yeah i hope this changes for her like this is just like i just can't imagine like she's

like does like she's like faces of like different like found like chronic illness like foundations and shit i'm like you're not no one's gonna do this with you again you cannot do that i'm gonna disagree with you in saying that she's not a bad person because i think she is i also i like her i don't know much about her history i do like her music but like she's a super spreader she not only was she like at the event she's singing the whole time her breath her spit is going everywhere she's around the fans she's probably touching their hands and things she's also around her singer her other singers and dancers and stuff so all not just like it's not just her every person that has been breathe her air around her is also spreading it to wherever they are

and then it meticulates throughout the the stadium so i don't think this one time maybe but doing it five times is reckless no i agree i just i don't think she's going to double down and say like this is not a big deal covid it's not i think she will i believe her apology but i don't think she would double down publicly being like this was not a bad thing that i did i don't maybe she wouldn't believe it but like the other thing that i'm like to say that you when you are leading this one of the biggest tours i mean i think it was the old she i think it was the biggest tour at the time because it was pre during renaissance and pre um eras biggest tour at the time people are in precarious financial situations specifically the arts

and like people can say like okay they're not going to work and like they're gonna like they can't do that but then are they still going to be getting paid for those shows like are you taking a quarantine period do people feel like they actually can turn you down to like to to do that and then also you let everyone know except for the fans so if it wasn't a big deal and like they were it was a calculated risk that they assumed that they could have been fine with you would have said it if you if you believed it you would have said it at the time like 10 toes down so like the the fact that it's months later and we're saying this as like a win you knew at the time it was not cool because you didn't tell people so now you're fine like

the fuck so yeah i just yeah i like i think probably a lot of me wanting her to like to not stand by it or to like apologize and like i obviously want everyone to learn from everything but like it's so it's even more frustrating to watch someone who's been a part of like the disabled community the chronic illness community do this because it then becomes like people going like oh no this person they're and they're fine with it and so then it becomes like a cool so someone who is a part of the community who is the at super high risk for this then you become the spokesperson for the people who don't want to take precautions and then you are the disabled person they know you are the sick person they know who say it's who says it's fine like

your word means a lot and you have a responsibility especially when like you're getting paid from like she's like the face of like a migraine like company that she's got she got fibromyalgia all of these things and I'm like that like what a colossal fucking disappointment and yeah I hope that nobody does it and I was pleasantly surprised to see like no support in the comment like people were just like completely floored but I don't see it being reported pretty much anywhere yep yep yep yep i was so mad yeah me too i was like just like disappointed like so not who i would have expected to do that like performative shake wear a mask to the vmas and like all that i'm like that doesn't fucking matter at this point then yep all right um mine is something that's

from your hometown area oh god okay i have so many guesses so the riverside county sheriff chad bianca no um he made a video on instagram that he posted in his car and it said well he was wearing his uniform and badge and everything and he said i think it's time we put a felon in the white house and so during this video he spoke about how frustrated he was with our governor and the attorney general and what he called their leniency on criminals and lack of support of law enforcement where i'm just like did you not just hear what you just said leniency on criminals but you want to in your words i think it's time to put a felon in the White House. He's been very critical of Governor Newsom in recent years for slashing his corrections

budget and letting prisoners out early and closing prisons. He's also called that the state legislator alleging that lawmakers pass laws to make it harder to put people in prison. But again, you just said, I think it's time we put a felon in the White House. He said, I've been critical of our attorney general for seemingly not caring about crime and really being an embarrassment to law enforcement. And so over the last 30 years, he's been arresting criminals and putting them in jail, keeping them out of neighborhoods and keeping the community safe. I got to be honest, I'm getting tired. I think we need to go big. You know me, go big or go home. and so he is such a staunch trump supporter but he wants to be hard on criminals make it make sense

he can't they they're just so unhinged what's his position again the sheriff of the county of riverside yes another fun fact because i was like i was like i'm pretty sure something else has happened with that recently about a month ago uh this is from la times culminating a year-long investigation dubbed quote-unquote hotline bling stories in riverside have seized millions of dollars worth of illegal drugs and arrested 15 people suspected of helping a mexican drug cartel trafficking network including a riverside county sheriff's deputy not the same man but like you know it is unfortunate how lenient going on criminals as in your co-worker who just got busted for trafficking like fucking pounds of drugs

okay okay yeah that would be frustrating too maybe reported to hr like i just seem like it's also because they like don't believe that if you want to put a felon in the white house okay why can't i think of any other felons like famous felons who like are just philly felons that you like want there or no but then i'm saying that like it's so i'm so sorry i just googled famous felons and it said danny trejo and robert johnny jr google we need some help that's not what this means um jack the ripper charles manson jeffrey dahmer like those kinds of what what's the criteria of felons should we break it down into like smaller i only want felons um who constant who have you heard the whole thing that he constantly smells like shit and people are like

he like shits his pants all the time one that constantly smells like a poopy poop poopy poop um with a terrible spray tan um a yellow toupee a thick neck and who looks like he and mitch mcconnell if you put them in the desert they'd melt faster than an ice cream cone like you got to get more specific about which felon yeah and then he was brought on to kc kcal news and they were trying to like make sense of what he was saying and he just kind of doubled down on it it was like it was almost like that was just my way of showing how crazy that argument is that we have to disregard real crime murders rapists gangs drugs all of those things and we just need to make sure that he's a felon and we lock him up forever and we can't vote for him

i mean it's psychological warfare right now what what so he's saying he's not a real felon but we are so lenient on the real felons but like the fake felons they can still be president i would love to hear how he describes like the felony of rape and how that is and donald trump is not involved in that whatsoever and then also the what's actually considered felony rape and then what's actually tried and tested felony rape and then i'd also love to know what he thinks about when women make accusations against men like he wanted to go viral and he did yep he never said he was smart and neither did way made the fucking idiot he said he's getting tired sounds like he's getting tired he should retire retire go to sleep go to fucking

sleep well that's the end of the episode well we hope you all enjoyed um let me see if i have any other fun little thing to end on for you oh i don't even really need to like click through the article but play the flame orders entire red lobster menu in effort to save company i do wonder if he's trying to save the red lobster company as a whole or that specific franchise location well you know they went bankrupt they're going they filed for bankruptcy so that's it's probably as a whole please buy it please buy it he also what what was the team some olympic team that they needed money and he gave it's a women's team i can't remember wait he says your boy meant it when i said i was gonna do anything and everything to help bread lobster and save the

cheddar bread biscuits yeah i love him he sponsored the u.s women's water polo team for paris because they didn't have enough money and i'm like why how do they not have enough money but he sponsored them he is one of my favorite underrated celebrities yeah also he has a hold it very soft spot in my heart because he was reality tv for me like so fantastic um but he is also he says he's in scheduled and talks scheduled to have a talk with red lobsters open to potential collaboration in the near future do it they can say yeah he oh yeah the entire u.s women's wait the u.s women yes that's what i'm saying for the paris games he is sponsoring them that of all sports i mean it's always fucking crazy but like to me water polo is akin to soccer i don't need

to watch men play because the women like dominate dominate i grew up in a water polo swim town so you'd watch those girls you'd watch that water turn pink you'd watch them scratch their grow their toenails up scratch till they bleed and then you'd see the boys be like oh foul he kinked me he's my water in my eye and the girls are bleeding trying to drown each other and like refs would be like are you good and they're like no i'm fine nothing's happened oh my god that's devastating and insulting yep so good on him he said um well it it was uh one of the olympians the captain she had posted something and said many of my teammates aren't just champions but also teachers business owners coaches physicians assistants and more some may not

know this but most olympians need second or third jobs to support chasing the dream including myself and most teams rely on sponsors for travel accommodations nutritional support rent lodging and simply affording to live in this day and age and so he saw the post and reached out to them and said i got daughters and i know what it feels like to be competitive but yet not recognized for what you do women's water polo is not really a big popular sport like basketball or football but i would love to see the sport grow because i love watching it being played that's why i stepped in and decided to help these girls out it's all about giving back he's like historically been just awesome like and he does stuff like all the time and i know that like swifties are like discovering

him because he like goes to taylor swift concert and he like buys merch on like etsy like he like doesn't like it's just he's what like the media wanted us to think dj khaled was of just like look at this happy look wonderful great vibes and i'm like dj khaled the man is that even okay no no yeah just like like i yeah i love him and that makes me happy oh and finally jason kelsey went on his podcast and said that uh or he tweeted and then talked about his podcast that they've been lied to by Big Soap and you really only need to wash your hotspots. And he says he's never washed his legs

or his feet in his life. And this man just retired from playing football. Good God, Kylie Kelsey, I hope you sleep in a different bed because that man has fungus on his feet. I wash my, every time I shower, wash my legs, wash my feet between the toes, behind my ear, like every crevice.

I don't feel, you feel slimy if you don't fucking scrub your body. And he was playing professional sports with other people's bodies. Yeah. Disgusting. It's time to take their mics. No, it's well overdue.

I don't think we should, as women, we're subjected to so much. I don't think that I should be subjected to, I mean, he picked up Quinta, remember? I know. Immediately, I was like, how could you do that to her? Yeah.

Now it's down to Joey and... frankie and frankie and then those two british men the black ones yep that's it the end you guys have lost your fucking privileges and you never had that we didn't give them to you you took them as you do yeah but citizens arrest put your hands up jail all right that's the end for real now well we hope you all enjoyed leave us a review if you would like on the podcast app or you can leave an individual review for the episode over on spotify as always you can write in for the But Are You Wrong segment and we will

rule with our own gavel and you can also vote for last this week's episode and then tomorrow stay tuned

and listen to the results from last week's episode hell yeah and we will circle back circle back goodbye But Am I Wrong

is a production by me Megan Rinks and me Melissa Demonts plus Diamond Imprint Productions post-production by Coco Lorenz and production assistance by Melanie D. Watson.